#i know tumblrs gonna destroy the quality rip

[mudkipper]

Damn yall are really bad at flirting

[mintywolf]

AO3 Tag Game Thing

Tagged by @astoriacolumnstaircase. Thank you!

How many fandoms have you written for?

Ever? I mean my first ever was a Sound of Music sequel that I wrote in kindergarten. But if you mean like posted online, five. Chronologically: Phantom of the Opera, BloodRayne, Final Fantasy X, Fire Emblem Fates, and Critical Role. On AO3 right now though I only have FE and CR because some of those were before I came to AO3 and I also have a(n admittedly bad) habit of destroying old or unfinished works that I don’t think I’m going to come back to. :\ (RIP The Heretic’s Daughter, you just never found your audience.)

What’s your favorite fic on your Ao3?

The one I’m most excited about is A Long Road Home, although it’s a comic that I’m crossposting to there from tumblr. Definitely the one that’s taking the highest level of dedication and the one with upcoming plot developments that I’m most eager to get to!! I’ve been really happy about how kindly it’s been received by the fandom and how many people seem to be enjoying it. I am too.

Although I’ve kind of moved on from the fandom I’m still pretty proud of Nohrian Lullaby, because it’s a complete novel (with illustrations!). While it stands on its own it was however the first part of a planned trilogy but now that I’ve gotten into Critical Role I think I’d have a hard time going back to it, haha. It was Fire Emblem’s voice cast that led me to CR but now that I’ve gotten to know them all I feel like I’d have a hard time approaching e.g. King Garon and Queen Mikoto with the solemnity they have in the game knowing now what Travis and Marisha are like at the table. XD

Have you posted elsewhere? If yes, which of those fics is your favorite?  

I’m most proud of Guardian (another comic) because that was a huge undertaking and in order to do it I had to forcibly overcome the SEVERE executive dysfunction that had been hindering me for my entire life. (Absolutely trashed my school performance and for some reason none of the adults around me seemed to think that this might be a symptom of a larger problem? I was just repeatedly told “But you’re smart! You just need to work harder!” and could not figure out why I just couldn’t.) But when I started working on that and was kind of floundering at the beginning having a hard time keeping up with it, I told myself that if I wanted to see it exist in the world, then I had to be the one to create it, and basically brute-forced myself out of a lifetime habit of destructive procrastination. I taught myself to break a huge task (200+ page comic) into smaller tasks (one page at a time) and set a schedule to make that workable (day one sketch, day two lineart, and so on). And now I sincerely don’t allow myself to procrastinate anymore. If I’m given a task to do I know to get it done ASAP before it starts to seem unconquerably huge and that is honestly as much as an accomplishment as the comic itself. It’s still a struggle but it has improved the quality of my life by a lot. (Still have not received diagnosis or treatment for whatever is causing the executive dysfunction! But at least I’ve managed to wrestle that beast to the ground and am continuing to hold it there.)

How many bookmarks do you have on AO3?

I only recently figured out what they are for, haha, so 6.

How many unread comments do you have?

None! See the above procrastination thing. I have already replied to them all. :)

Any subscriptions?

About as many as the bookmarks. Currently I’m most looking forward to updates from Consequences of a Bleeding Heart and The Madness from the Salt. :D

Any favorite tags?  

Laudna & Imogen Temult, Laudna/Imogen Temult, and within those I tend to comb through for AUs with an interesting premise. (Judging by my bookmarks my definition of “interesting” seems to trend towards “vampires” haha.)

I don’t know if she’s still active on tumblr but I’m gonna tag @auronlu bc she has had a very respectable fic writing career! (Feel free to ignore this, however.)

[sungbeam]

Me when serpent and dove: 👁️👄👁️⁉️🫣😱🫵😐💔🤯⁉️🤡

Like man just because you’re going through Jichang brain rot doesn’t mean that you have to give it to me too 👹/j

AND THANK YOU I KNEW YOU’D UNDERSTAND THE SUNSET LINE LIKE THERE WAS A REASON I HIGHLIGHTED IT 😭 but Ofc I’m insecure so I always downplay what I like so that no one else can make fun of it cause I already made fun of it myself #copingmechanisms #earlybirdgetstheworm 🥲 I’m glad you get it like I do tho 😔🫶

It’s so sad that you haven’t read for fun in a while tho 😭 BUT YOU’RE JUST LIKE ME FR CAUSE IDK THE QUALITY OF PRINTED LITERATURE THESE DAYS IS JUST BAD 😩 Like FR a double whammie smh you got the same boring plot and the same boring covers 😔💔 IT’S LIKE- WHY WOULD I PAY $20+ FOR A BOOK THAT I PROBABLY READ 3 TIMES BEFORE JUST WITH DIFFERENT NOUNS IF I COULD READ A BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN ONESHOT BY SUNGBEAM HERSELF?? I hereby declare this tomfoolery yessir

AND YOU HAVENT WATCHED MIRROR MIRROR WITH THE STUNNING LILY COLLINS AKA MY FAV NEPOBABY??? I was actually gonna send the link for the opening scene but no one cared to post the opening scene on YouTube but they bothered to post the FULL MF MOVIE 💀💀💀

I would send the link but it seems that the paste thing timed out and I don’t want to leave the Tumblr app (rip mobile) again cause it will refresh everything (yes this is my second time writing this) so just look up mirror mirror opening scene on YouTube 😭

AND THANK YOU POOKIE I’M GLAD MY IDEAS WERE GOOD ACTUALLY LMAO 🤭 and nooo I haven’t watched rescuers even tho it does ring a bell 🤔

And ok??? Damn I was just making sure I had all bases covered just in case you were being a perv like smh idk your life 🙄☝️/jkjk SJFJEJR

Oh and I haven’t watched secret invasion but I kinda just thought abt it cause yk superheroes/marvel LMAO but have you watched ‘the boys’ on Amazon prime? It was actually pretty interesting (even tho TW it’s way more explicit in the blood, death, and sexual aspects and it did take a hot sec for me to get used to it 💀) but I actually would recommend it just be weary of those warnings 🫡 also you might’ve even seen a reaction vid from it since it got pretty popular on tiktok/twt 😭

ALSO NEW ALBUM DROPPING THE 7TH OF AUGUST BUT NOT A SINGLE PEEP OR SCHEDULER FROM IST LIKE GIRL WTF HOW RUSHED IS THIS CB GONNA BE ESP IF ITS A FULL ALBUM LIKE- 🧍‍♀️

Also also hopefully this isn’t overstepping or anything but I wanted to let you know that you’re not alone and I really related to your ‘scroll past this’ post :( it’s kind of hard not feeling that way and I do kind of get impostor syndrome too just cause I feel like I can never accomplish anything and I can never make it to people’s expectations of me but honestly I think I just need to be kinder to myself? And you should too! Something I do to remember that I have to be kinder to myself is by imagining my inner monologue being directed to the younger version of myself. I went through a lot when I was a kid and I just know that if I say what I say to myself/about myself to my younger self then it would completely destroy me. And if it would’ve destroyed me then, why wouldn’t it destroy me now? And it’s cause it does. It chips at me, albeit slowly. And then I’ll just absolutely break down one day. But we’re on this earth too short to be hurting and anxious and insecure all the time. When you feel overwhelmed it’s good to just… back away for a bit. Maybe cook, get some ice cream, take a walk in the park, just sit outside and breathe. Ground yourself and remind yourself that although you’re not perfect, no one is. You can always be a happier version of yourself though so just do what feels right at the moment and live in the moment :) I don’t want to downplay your pain at all but I really hope that I could provide at least a smidge of comfort since that’s what I do when I’m really feeling down (esp existential rip) :,)

- If you have breath you have purpose. You are an instrument, a testament, that these minutes can be survived. (Raquel Franco)

Love, 🌷 anon

LISTEN. serpent and dove has been hiding in my drafts folder since JUNE I HAVE BEEN EXERCISING A LOT OF SELF CONTROL OKAY :l

NO CUZ i do that too 😭😭😭 #copingmechanism frfr cuz if i already clown it then ur clownery will have no effect skfnkenff

TEARS ! anyways,, , ahem yes i do appreciate that sunset line, it makes me feel something for once so thank u ma'am 😔 WAIT I JUST SAW THE EARLY BIRD GETS THE WORM SKDNSKDM AHAHHAHAHA when the worm = dignity 💔💔💔

HELPPP DONT SAY THAT UR GONNA MAKE ME SEVERELY DELULU ABT MY WRITING ABILITIES 🤡🤡🤡 no but i FEEL u, like i find books that im intrigued by, but a lot of them are just copy paste of each other and they never intrigue me and r ALWAYS in some form WEIRD or PROBLEMATIC 😭😭 like why would i pay money for ur copy paste covers when i can find that for free on wattpad /hj tho there r some books w those kinds of covers that r like that lol emily henry i hear is pretty good and i can't wait to finally read her shit 😔 once i get my shit together skdnkenf

blr is going down hill and FR WHY DO THEY RESET FOR ASKS LIKE CAN I NOT DRAFT AN ASK IT TAKES COURAGE AND TIME AND CAREFUL CONSIDERATION— lmslmflenf LMAO 😭😭😭 OKAY I'LL LOOK IT UP LATER 🤡 AHHAHAHA when they said, if we're gonna pirate, we're gonna go all the way !!!

takes one to know one abt the perv life 🤨🤨🤨 ANYWAYS 😁🤸‍♀️

OMG I've seen clips of the boys and it's low-key like 😭😭😭 scary skfnkejfk i mean like, the main blonde hero dude is TERRIFYING and i mean that in the best possible way. i watched a video essay on how to make a terrifying villain, and they used the boys as an example, and i had to look away from some of the parts just cuz it was so violent, and his SMILE IS O_O FRIGHTENING.

GIRL IKIKIK THEY JUST POSTED TEASERS OF THE THREE CONCEPTS !!! ITS CALLED "PHANTASY" AND TBH I THOUGHT OF DANNY PHANTOM 💔💔💔 low-key if kev came back w the blonde hair he could totally pull off danny phantom, i don't make the rules— i think my favorite concept look so far is love letter !! but i think as more is posted i'll def change 💀 we'll see 💀 NO FR IST REALLY PULLING A FASTBALL ON US FOR THIS??? like HELLO?? they're literally supposed to cb in TWO WEEKS AND I NEED TIME TO SCREAM AND YELL AND MENTALLY PREPARE AND FIGURE OUT IF IM GONNA CAVE AND BUY AN ALBUM—

ahh thanks tulip 🥺 i really appreciate u saying all that, and ,, yeah,,, i never really thought abt like if i was speaking to my younger self like that and it really does put things into perspective. i've become the person who i despised yet was desperate to please when i was a kid, and that's ,, awful. it's awful esp since i can't run away from myself like i could those people from my past. im sorry u went thru shit as a kid :( ig we find our own ways to cope and grow and try to move on, and maybe we won't always make it out of the woods immediately. i used to think i had a pretty good view of myself, and then i realized it was all just a cover-up? like it was a mask on top of a mask and it was fake and it was just covering up all the truly damaged parts of me like a bandage over a bullet wound. yeah fsfs! i forced myself to step away that day. i actually went and cleaned my bedroom workspace up w like noise cancelling headphones on and it made me feel so much better. bro fr like,, when do we not feel existential atp, sometimes i feel like im not actually "go w the flow" but "i don't care enough anymore"

— Promise me not to hide yourself when you're in pain, it's unfair that we laughed together but you cried alone. (unknown) ❤️

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh Season Zero: The Yo-yo Crimes of Jounouchi Pt 2

OK, last we left off, we were in a different Youtube video. This one I grabbed off of 2 different videos (you’ll see their watermark in the corner change) and it makes me appreciate the quality that our other episodes have been, honestly. A little bit of compression going on in these, just to give you even more of that nostalgic feel of watching a bootleg anime from the 90′s your brother got from his weird high school friend’s Napster account.

Because this is done with subtitles on, it takes more caps to cover it. Part of why I rewrite the dialogue in these recaps is to help abridge stuff, and so consider yourself warned...there’s a lot of caps in this one. For most of you, that’s probably not much of a problem. But I’m just letting you know because...I sure wasn’t expecting it to be over 40 caps for half an episode, and I’ll probably just type less to make up for that. (Tumblr keeps Erasing All My Words anyway, so this is for the best, but that’s a tech issue I already went into in another post.)

(read more under the cut)

So, to start off, Yugioh and co. walk up to a bar like a really weird version of a bar joke and are like “do you know where we can find the yo-yo gang?” And, much like a video game npc, the bartender was like “I know EXACTLY what you’re talking about, and I heard every part of their intimate conversation. Let me give you all the details, children.”

Hey, PS, there’s an entire Wikipedia entry about the bar joke. And that is wild. Apparently the first bar joke was from Ancient Sumeria, and Wikipedia was like “Here is the Sumerian joke, but we Do Not Get it. Please don’t try to get it.”

The joke being: "A dog walked into a tavern and said, 'I can't see a thing. I'll open this one'."

Damn. I can’t believe the Sumerians were onto meme humor before we ever invented memes. They were in the Galaxy brain over there in the land before time, holy crap. Depositing their memes knowing that 7,000 years later mankind would look at the world’s first joke and be like “I don’t get it!” while all the millennials and zoomers with our MB of nonsense memes on our phones are like “No. I get it.” Good on you Sumerians, that is freakin the best joke ever made. 7000 years to get to the punch line of confusing the hell out of all us. Bless.

They promptly tell Miho that everything was resolved and that she should go to bed and she was like “Cool!” and exited stage left. Bye, I guess. Anzu also went home, but she didn’t have to be tricked into doing it, she just went the hell to bed.

(PS, I just realized that if I want to write less...I should probably not look up Wikipedia articles about the world’s first ever bar joke. But y’all, habits die so freakin hard, and I just feel like it’s very pertinent to this Yugioh recap, although I know it’s really not.)

Yuugi and Honda decide to visit the warehouse and harass Jounouchi. In the context of the show, they’re going out of their way to pull their best friend out of society’s systemic downward pull of a life of crime and most likely turning into exactly like his Father. But, the way that it’s storyboarded makes it look a lot like these kids just show up out of the corner and this gang was like “Damn it, again? OMG small children, please leave us alone!”

Honda hands over the symbolism sash, to which Jounouchi symbolically says “Nyeh.”

And Honda didn’t take it very well.

After tending to his kidneys for a little while, Honda decided to go back at it again at the Krispy Cream and do some sort of insane parkour over this completely ordinary fence.

Ah, the very first instance of real duel law where you duel over a relationship. In later seasons duel law is invoked for things like Mai’s marriage and the right to date Tea (and then just kind of forgetting you ever won the right to date Tea twice). But to think the very first time was Honda dueling for the right of Jounouchi to be part of nerd gang because Jounouchi had fallen to the dark side yo-yo gang across the street run by some 40 year old man with blue hair.

How many times is Honda gonna fight with a broom? Like are they just magnetized to his location? where are they even coming from?

Freakin janitor powers over here, put him in a Final Fantasy style RPG. I want to see what his limit break would be.

Not like it matters, because Hirotani very quickly explains why these yo-yo’s are at all a threat.

Which honestly shouldn’t be...so lethal? Seems like the weight is all you need, not really the spikes. But it’s at least stronger than Honda’s janitor stuff.

Unfortunate for Honda that he just destroyed an antique.

So with lightning reflexes, Yuugi does what he does most:

The death yo-yo ricochets back and does this little itty bitty scrape to this guy’s face and he’s real bothered by it. Although it’s like...well dude, you’re a 50 year old high schooler, I don’t think people will notice the scrape compared to everything else falling apart in your life.

And so then the Yugioh Season Zero team was like “oh shoot is it time to torture Yuugi???” and they got hella excited.

Like I thought it was just Yuugi’s class that were a bunch of disturbing criminal disasters, but I guess it’s the whole city. Like...was Yuugi’s class the good school?

I mean, it can’t be, there’s no way...

but like...is there a good school in this universe? How does anyone survive till graduation? If you so much as disgrace a yo-yo, you will get the torture treatment that I sure did expect in Yakuza games, but not so much in Yugioh, tbh.

Just a reminder: This is the third time we’ve beat up Yuugi this episode. Within the first meeting of Yuugi and Hirotani, he beat the tar out of Yuugi within eye shot of Jounouchi. So like...Jounouchi was reallllllllllllllllly lax on that deal, right? Like...he took his toot sweet time to realize “yeah this just ain’t ever gonna happen.”

And then the yo-yo wars begin.

Just like Solid Snake crawling through the radiation chamber.

Hirotani throws his Fyper-yoyo, Jounouchi intercepts with his Eireboy, and Hirotani’s completely terrible yo-yo just flies off the string again because Hirotani should have just sticked to using his fists. No wonder they wanted to recruit Jounouchi so badly, their yo-yo game is so off.

We never get a door to darkness in this episode, dipping our enemies into mind horrors. Instead, we get home-alone style traps. But, this makes sense. Not only do the show makers have to make Yuugi avoid solving problems with magic in front of Jounouchi, they also have to make it Jounouchi’s choice to leave Hirotani behind. If Yuugi did it for him in like...some sort of duel law situation...then that sort of leaves out Jounouchi’s choice in the equation.

Not like this ever really comes up in later seasons, since who even follows through with duel law and marries Mai? But like, it does feel like Season Zero calls out the later Seasons a bit in this regard. Honda got beat up because he tried to win Jounouchi back by force (or game, I guess.) That was just another form of coercion on the heels of Hirotani’s. What Jounouchi actually needed was to make his own decision to leave.

...most other anime I’d be like “I’m sure that’s just a translation error” but not this one.

So Yuugi runs to the roof where Jounouchi will never see this.

My audible sigh reading this line about fight club roof.

These stupid gang members went into Yuugi’s native territory, not just a fight club roof, but on a warehouse? They were dead before they arrived.

This was like maybe 3 frames of animation in just rapid succession, it was pretty silly and good.

Reminder that like 4 minutes ago, Yuugi was about to get like executed on a meat hook.

Speaking of getting executed on a meathook:

Hope you like the idea of glass in your eyes, because this anime’s got it.

They chase Yuugi around, in a sequence that was done mostly to conserve frames, so you rarely saw the ground until this shot:

Lots of falling down this episode, but unlike Tea, who fell from a warehouse ceiling once and just kind of rubbed her ass after and was like “ah damn it.” these guys won’t come out of it virtually unscathed.

Also, Honda is here now:

Jumping off of his symbolic sash trapeze, he decides to do in Hirotani for good.

Hey so like...walk the dog is a fairly gentle walk that a yo-yo does slowly on the ground right?

Just pointing out how sensitive Hirotani’s fingies are.

And he...didn’t appear to be dead, so I don’t have to add to the bodycount...but it’s gonna be a real long road for recovery.

And now, with the gang back together Jounouchi is back at school knee deep in make up assignments he’ll probably completely ignore since we know that in a years time, these fools are going to be trapped on Pegasus’ island, and at that point school will be just that place you talk about when you try to remember why you’re friends with Bakura.

---hey aren’t those chairs attached to the desks?

Because...holy crap, Anzu.

Honestly this is what you see before you die, but I guess Jounouchi died off screen after the episode ended, so I don’t have to add him to the deathcount (again). RIP.

Alright! That took like...8 tries to get Tumblr to save this one, but it managed! (well...I guess “managed” isn’t the word you’d use for a typing program that takes 8 tries to save)

Next time, we’ll be back to S5, for an arc I’ve heard is kind of boring. We’ll see. If it truly is, I can condense episodes into fewer posts. Or maybe it’s a secret gem? I guess we shall see.

And if you just got here this is a link to read all the Season Zero recaps from the start:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yuugi-muto/chrono

(there’s also a link to read all the Yugioh posts we wrote from the start in chrono order but straight up, this file won’t freakin save, and I just can’t even will myself to look up that link again. It’s on the home page of this blog on the right.)

[adamarinayu]

Did you see the trailer for the rest of season 2? Did you see Donald?

Yes!! I did! And I am so excited hggggg I need it now

Somewhat happy to see a payoff to the “people can’t understand Donald” joke- I don’t remember if I said it here on tumblr or to my discord friends, but I called it that Lunaris was gonna use it to his advantage! And hnnn Donald is gonna go toe to toe against Lunaris!! And I assume Penumbra’s gonna help him, by freeing him and telling him of Lunaris’ plan...

I so, so very hope that it’s Donald flying the golden rocket and not Penumbra, destroying the large gold ship (a transit ship? I’m not sure what it is but that sequence from the trailer looks SO COOL). It’d be so badass to see Donald actually flying a rocket properly, and take out a large part of Lunaris’ army. 

I still hope to see PK but at this point I’m guessing we’re not getting PK, since Donald was fighting against Lunaris himself, but hey! Frank did say they didn’t reveal every character :) I’m also hoping for a little heart to heart between Donald and Penumbra, before she chooses to help him, where we finally get his side of the Spear of Selene story (as we’ve only gotten Scrooge’s part, not Donald or Della’s). It’d be nice to see Penumbra choosing to help Donald out of compassion rather than guilt. But I’m not sure there’ll be any time for that, amidst everything else.

I’m curious about all of the screens and diagrams! Like the Lunarians have been monitoring Earth, or something. Specifically Donald’s nephews on the screen. Also that really weird family tree that pops up and crosses out Donald’s face- are we gonna get a Disney Death?? Is Lunaris gonna initially win against Donald, and Donald be declared dead until he comes swooping in at the last moment (either as PK or Donald, either one would be EPIC) like SURPRISE BITCH I LIVED and just takes out Lunaris’ army?

Will the triplets, Webby, Della, Scrooge, Mrs. Beakley, etc etc be involved in the fight against the Lunarians or will they be fighting the villain teamup while Donald fights the Lunarians?? So many questions, so many options. 

The villain teamup- whoo wee when Glomgold goes for it he goes hard. Was he the one recruiting everyone? I assume so, but yeah. Why is Magica green again? I’m guessing she regained her magic since we last saw her!

Oh yeah and something I was wondering about when I saw the poster! (sorry about bad quality image rip)

... Assuming Penumbra sides with Donald, Baby Beaks isn’t evil, Owlson is just a business woman, and Goldie isn’t evil, there are only two villains on this poster; Don Karnage and Zeus. It could be argued that Zeus is more an antagonist than a villain, so... Don Karnage.

(of course, I never watched Talespin so there are characters on here I don’t recognize, so if I’m wrong go ahead and correct me hgg)

I just can’t help but wonder why Don Karnage is the only actual villain (and not just antagonist) on the poster? No Glomgold, no Magica, no Beagles, none of the well known classics. No Vultures, not even current threat Lunaris. But Don Karnage is there.

Now I’m not saying “redemption arc for Don Karnage” but I think it’s interesting. Maybe it’s just because he’s in a plane? I don’t know. Just an interesting thing to note.

[theabominableblogger]

My Reaction to “Gotham” S5E2

In Which Harvey Continues to be the Best Goddamn Thing in This Show

I was a lucky son of a duck and managed to get this reaction while the episode was airing live on FOX last night.  For episodes 3-12, I will be waiting for Hulu to receive them because of an upcoming spring semester at college.  So for episodes 3-12, I will be in the dark until Friday or Saturday (so no spoilers from y’all).

Also, on TV, there are so many GOD.  DAMN.  COMMERCIALS.

AN:  I managed to record my reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post.

*Recaps shows the chopper*  OK, so who freakin’ shot down the chopper?

Oh, Tabitha...

*We see a whole bunch of injuries on Will’s back*  What the...

“They call themselves the Soothsayers.”  The Sooth- what?

“They’re digging some sort of tunnel.”  *gasps and reels back*  It’s Jeremiah!  ‘Cause he has a tunnel!  Oh my God!

What’s the tunnel for?

OK, never mind then, I don’t think Jeremiah’s in charge of the Soothsayers

“The second you [Jim] step outside that door, someone’s gonna take a shot at you, and if it’s not you that’s getting hit, it’s the schmoe standing next to you.”  *laughs*

*Jim hangs up on the radio*  Who’s on the other end?

“Four shells each.  Half a mag each.”  Wow.

“Will says the Soothsayers are here, which means we have to pass through Sirens territory.”  Ooh.

“She’s [Barbara] gonna be thrilled to see you [Jim] after what happened with Tabitha.”  Ooooff...

Wait, so is the Dark Zone like around Gotham?  At the docks or...

What?

So this is Robinson Park, OK... so this is where Ivy is.

Oh, these sets look nice.  Getting some serious Arkham Knight flashbacks.

Swore I just saw someone move in the background...

*Bruce catches a guy trying to sneak up on him*  Yeah.

“They came for help too!”  What district are they from?  Why are they British?

*jams along with opening theme*

*silently headbangs to heavy metal cover of "Ring of Fire” by Social Distortion playing in Barbara’s club*

*Everyone stops dancing when Jim arrives*  Oooohhhh... ooohh hoo hoo hoooo...

“It’s a police matter.”  “You know, they should really write that on your tombstone.”  *laughs*

“Drive right into this nightmare you’ve created.”  Actually it’s Jeremiah... kay...

“HAVE AT HIM!  RIP HIM TO SHREDS!”  Ooof.

*Panning shot of an absolute dark Gotham*  Oh my God.

*laughs*  There’s just this one random burst fire hydrant!

So is this whole episode gonna be them [Jim and Harvey] fighting their way out of the Dark Zone?

*jaw drops when someone shoots an arrow at Harvey*

“It’s a freaking arrow, Jim!  IT’S A FREAKING ARROW!”  *scoffs in shock*

Whooooo I remember her [the Day of the Dead lady] from the trailers!

Yeah, that’s the same... freaking tunnel

“The smoke... you [Gabriel] should take it.”  No.

“It’ll give you energy-”  Oh my God, is that Viper?  Is that Viper from S1?

“-see the future.”  What?

Or does Jeremiah shanghai this whole tunnel later this season?

“Once this tunnel is complete, we will have exclusive access to the mainlands.”  Oh my God, they are going to the mainland!

God, that guy [Sykes] just spit everywhere!

Sykes?  Isn’t that the bad guy from Oliver and Company?

“In Penguin’s grace, we will remain.”  Ohh, that’s a good line.

“What are the cattle prods for?”  “Fun.”  *scoffs in hilarity*

“If he [Sykes] moves, kill him.”  Oh ho!  Jim’s not messin’ around!

Yeah, that’s that same tunnel that Jeremiah [and Ecco] are in in some of those pictures.

AN:  Take a shot every time I mention the damn tunnel.

So is Gabriel Will’s older brother?

“Why would anyone be a cop in a world like this?”  “Well, the Halloween shop was all out of gas masks so it was either this or Sexy Nurse.” *reels back in chair from laughter*

“Let take ‘im, boys.”  CHEESE IT, BOYS!

*Sykes and his men try to take the kids*  Oh no.

*Jim comes to the rescue*  Yay.

*One of the car tires get shot*  Ooohhh...

*Commercials start*  OK... OK... so... what?

Wait, so is Jeremiah gonna leave for the mainland?  Like “Syke, I’m gonna get out of here!”

Noo... because his mission is Bruce so I don’t think he even wants to leave Gotham.  It’s the whole “I don’t wanna kill you!  What would I do without you?” mantra going on.

Whaaaaaatt...

What is she [Ivy] wearing?

“You have to believe me.”  “Forgive me if I find it hard to do so.”  COLD.

“It wasn’t me.  It was the park.”  *in unison with Bruce*  The park?

“The plants are my protection.”  ...OK.

“Maybe we can help each other.”  Bruce...

TELL HER IT’S SELINA!

“There’s a seed.  It’s growing under the oaks.  It’s said to have magical qualities.  When digested, it goes to the damaged tissue and bone.”  A seed?

Wwwhhhhaaaattt?

Ed?  Hello?  How are you?  Where are you?  Are you in the library again?  Why are sleeping with your glasses on?

What is going on?

That [library] looks like Oswald’s old house [the van Dahl mansion]

Oh my God, are we gonna see Ed peeing?

EEUUGGHHH we don’t need to be seeing this...

Oh my God, there’s someone in the frickin’ [bathtub]...

“There’s nothing there.”  *laughs*

Waaaaiit... what’s going on?

[Ed] You’re gonna attack him [the Street Demon] with a toilet plunger!  *cackles*

“Did I uh...” *chuckles*

“We’re gonna have to do all this again?  Guess so...”  *scoffs*

What is that place?

“It’s not safe out there.”  No dip, Jim.

“Maybe there’s still good people left in Gotham.”  Mmmmmm....

Yeah, you’re [Jim and Harvey] gonna leave three kids there [in the lobby].  All alone.  In a strange building.  Great.

Harvey, you’re a blessing.

Yeah, you’re gonna leave the three kids there.  Right.  Great idea.  Great idea.

These sets are fabulous.

“Hello?”  Blaaggghh!  Jump scare!

“GCPD.”  Take a shot!

Was that a crow [in the background]?

There’s just a bunch of random folded clothes everywhere.

*Harvey finds the dinner table full of body parts*  Oh my God...

Are those teeth?

*Harvey finds a plate of bloody fingers*  :0

Oh my God, freaking- they’re freaking cannibals?!?

*gasps when Mother attacks Harvey*

*has to leap out of seat to cool off when commercials start*

Oh wow, I love Sweeney Todd.

*ends up coughing up a lung*

So far, again, this feels like a foundational episode.  It’s just like “OK, we gotta work on this, we gotta make sure this is safe,” and yeah.

I wonder if the Jaime Murray character is gonna show up at the end of the episode or something.

AN:  You may think that... but no.

I also wanna know what kind of crack these writers were on for this final season.  Tze Chun had the good shit; I dunno about the others.

*gasps in disgust when Ed hits the Street Demon in the mouth with a wrench.”

“[Ed] You wanted to know where the Street Demons base was.”  Why?

“Aaand you wanted to make sure the boss would be there.”  Why?

“OK, how did I [Ed] seem?  Was I... confident?  Flamboyant?  Charisma for days?”  *giggles*

“Or was I conserved, kinda repressed, a little nerdy?”  *laughs*

Soo... did Hugo combine the two personalities?  ‘Cause the pushing up the glasses is a new thing.

*gasps when Ivy kills the men who were holding her.”

“[Bruce] You are so utterly naive.”  Oh my God.

“[Selina] She is paralyzed and has lost the will to live.”  “Good.”  What?!?

“That bitch destroyed the last of the Lazarus Water.”  ExCUSe me?!?

“Let her suffer.”  Noooo...

You can tell that Peyton List [Ivy] is just wearing a whole bunch of face powder on.

“I am feeding the earth these wretched creatures.  It consumes them.”  She has lost her freakin’ mind.

*Ivy starts caressing Bruce’s neck*  Do not prick his neck.

“Those men you killed were right.  You are a witch.  A murderous, callous witch.”  WHOOOOOOO- oh my God...

Hoo!

“What’s your name?”  “I- I can’t remember.”  What?

“She found me?”  “Who?”  “The ghost!”  The ghost?

“She makes me call her.. Mother.”  *reels back and puts hands in the air*  It is Mother and Orphan!

Wait, is that the kid?

*The kid stays behind*  It is the kid!  That’s Orphan!

Oh my God...

“The lights will make you dizzy.  And then you’ll go to sleep.”  Oh this is cool..

“Jim, I don’t feel so good.”  Wow, I love Infinity War.

Actually no, I hated it.  I was sick the first time I saw it.

*gasps when Mother sneaks up behind Jim*

They really do need to put a flashing lights warning on this.

*gasps when Mother fights off Jim and Harvey*

*Harvey tries to leave*  There’s an open window!  You broke a window!  Go through the window!

*looking through the Gotham tag on Tumblr during commercials*  Wow, someone wrote some fanfiction quick.

Oh wow, I love Ghost Adventures!

*gasps when Ed and the Street Demon find the Street Demon leader wiped out.”

[Penguin Was HERE] Really?!?

*imitates the guitar riff going off*

*Ivy leads Bruce to the seed*  Oh my gosh, that’s so pretty

*Ivy gives Bruce the seed*  I ain’t eatin’ that...

“One thing’s for certain... the seed will alter her [Selina] forever.”  Great.

“Some say, the darker angels of our mind-”  Great.

Also, yay for natural lighting finally in this show.  I love it when they use natural lighting in the show.  It looks so nice.

“What’s the matter, Bruce?  Don’t know if you can trust me?”  I don’t trust you.

“I don’t.”  “Good.  then you’re finally becoming a man.”  Ivy, you’re like his age.  shut up.

*Ivy sits in one of the low sitting trees*  OK, so if the tree branches just grab her and just sink down into the ground, this will be the greatest thing.

“Detective Gordon, your hand’s bleeding.”  Uhhh...

*Sykes and his men arrive*  Oh my God... monster truck!

“Wait just a minute!  Please...”  Whoaaa... who are you?

I don’t know who that is.  She [the Day of the Dead looking lady] looks cool though.

*commercials start*  Who is this?  Who are you?

Five bucks:  Barbara comes in and saves the day even though she still hates Jim.  She hates everybody.  She comes in like “I’m just here for the kids, not you.”

Oh noo...

“Did you [Bruce] find the witch?”  “It was Ivy.”  Great!  Alfred’s like “Oh bloody brilliant!”

“What choice do I have?”  Bruuuce...

“I want to help Selina as much as you do but Ivy’s a maniacal, cold-hearted killer.”  You met her like twice, Alfred!

But true, she is.

“So if Ivy wants to kill me, she can have at it.”  Oh my God...

Who wrote this episode?  I’m gonna have words.

*Bruce gives Selina the seed*  Yeah, you’re gonna shove that down your throat.  Great.

Is she gonna chew it?

*Selina starts chewing the seed like a gummie vitamin*  OK then...

It’s the Spiderman bite except in fruit form.

*freezes when Selina starts seizing*

“God, what have I [Bruce] done?”  *extremely sad face*

“I’ll tell you what!  I’ll [Sykes] take his head!  And you can have the rest of him!”  *scoffs in shock*

*gasps when Jim shoots the Day of the Dead lady*

Is that a monster truck?!?

My sister:  Is that a tank?!?

That’s a monster truck!

*both immediately at loss of words when Barbara hops down*

Wow, I love Hot Wheels!

*jaw drops when Jim uses his last bullet to kill Sykes and defend Barbara*

Wow... that just... came out of nowhere!

“Wow.  Wasted your last bullet for me.  Must be love.”  No it is not.  Barbara, how dare you say that?

*Barbara tells Jim she wants to kill Penguin.”  Great.  Great plan.

Wait, you’re gonna invite Barbara to the Green Zone?  Yeah, great plan, Jim.  Great plan!

*Jim and Co. arrive at the Green Zone*  Whoa!

He [Lucius] looks fab!

Wait a minute, is this [the Green Zone] that apartment complex that got blown up in the trailer?!?  Are you freaking kidding me?

They’re gonna freaking blow this place up later in the season.  God dang it.  Who did it and why?  Who does it and why?

We stan one future police commissioner.

“See you around, killer.  We have some unfinished business, you and I.”  Nooo you don’t.  Cool off!

Oh crap, is she [Selina] gonna be gone in the morning?!?

Oh my God, Bruce hasn’t slept in like 48 hours?!?  Great.

*gasps*  She’s [Selina] not there!  Did she go out the window?

Did she pull a “Dark Knight Rises” and back flip out the window?

“Bruce...”  Oh no.

She [Selina] looks like Michelle Pfeiffer.

“[Selina] How do you feel?”  “Different.”  Why are her eyes closed?  Open yo eyes!

“I’m better.  Even better than before in fact.”  Mmmmm no!

*Bruce hugs Selina*  Yay hug!  We like hugs!  We like some hugs!  Yay!

Oh my God, she’s gonna go on a murdering spree and kill some people, isn’t she?

*Selina’s eyes*  WHAAATT the frick?!?  Wha-

WhaAAAAttt?!?

*gasps when Ecco pops up in the promo for next episode*

*ejects out of chair to cool off*

AN:  Ecco, your man better treat you right or I’m gonna fight him AND the writers.

We’re getting WhaAAAtt??? WHaaaAAT?? 

Oh my God...

[amaanfr-blog]

There was no one

(Spiderman homecoming, Irondad)

Waring: Suicide attempt, happy ending.

Summary:

My take on what was going in Peter's head when the warehouse collapsed on him, how he coped with it and what Tony Stark did about it.

"I just wanted to be like you,"

"and I wanted you to be better."

...

Well then. If Tony Stark could come out of a terrorist cave with shrapnel at his heart, wear a suit and save the world then the universe could damn well expect Peter Parker to get a measly building of his back.

But it hurt. The last bits of his courage collapsed with the warehouse. When he realized that his attempts at dodging the vulture were nothing. Then came the orchestra of broken bones, followed by gushing blood.

If only he had the suit. If he just had Karen for a few seconds. Anybody or AI that would listen.

"Help! H-help! please!" His voice broke. "Anybody! please...I'm down here, I'm stuck-I'm stuck I can't move I can't-I can't..."

And yet, there was no one.

He wondered if Mr. Stark would be more disappointed or embarrassed if he saw him right now. He wasn't doing this for Mr. Stark though, or Liz, or to get his suit back.

He was going to survive this and stop the vulture. So that innocent people don’t get hurt when Avenger level weaponry goes into the hands of people who would do anything for money.

Was he going to cry under a heap of concrete or get back on his feet and stop an aircraft hijacking, Spiderman-style?

“come on Spiderman, come on Spiderman, come” he groaned when something pointy grazed the slash on his leg. “come…on Spiderman”

Where lifting the rubble took every drop of physical strength he had, it taught  him something priceless in return:

He didn’t need a suit to be Spiderman.

...

Did Mr. stark get nightmares too? every time Peter closed his eyes, the concrete came back, laughing at him, mocking him. was he trying to be a superhero? he was an insect who survived being squashed. Nothing more.

He'd wake up crying, and his tears were nothing like the blood that kept gushing that night. tears were transparent, blood was red. Just like his Spiderman suit. just like Mr. Stark's armor.

Did Mr. Stark cry himself to sleep too?

...

The suit had grown on him, swinging out the window, he sat on the highest roof in eyesight, the moon was silver, not red like Ironman, or Spiderman, or his blood. it wasn't transparent like the tears of a teenage crybaby. It was a beautiful shade of silver.

If Mr. Stark found out he was crying on a random roof because of something that happened years ago, he'd definitely take his suit away. Peter immediately ripped the suit off, it had started to sting.

Thank god he was wearing something underneath.

He cocked his head and looked, down. Cars buzzing away and litten apartments and busy hotels. So many people were under him.

There was no one at the warehouse. One tear. he screamed, another tear, no one listened, he tried not to whimper.

No one would listen. No one ever listens. If he jumped, would people listen? they do say actions speak louder than words.

Would they care if their friendly neighborhood Spiderman suddenly disappeared?

Of course not. People remember the suave guy who saved all known and unknown worlds. not the kid who helped some old lady cross the fucking road. Do even you remember the name of the last guy who opened the door for you?

With that in mind he stood on the edge, how metaphorical, he had been on the edge for the past three years, this was just in a more literal sense.

He leaned forward, he was falling, no web following him, no safety buffer, just as he closed his eyes, May came to mind. Oh god, what was he doing, she'll be destroyed after this, first his parents then Ben, oh god please he'd do anything for May not to care about him. Ned, MJ, the Churro lady was going to hate him for this! Then Came Mr. Stark.

"And if you died, I feel like that's on me, I don't want that on my conscience"  he didn't have his web shooters he was gonna die, why did he leave them up there-wait he should've hit the ground by now.

Then he realized the pair of red metal arms holding him up. But Ironman wasn't moving, just floating, shaking.

Peter definitely fucked up.

"M-Mr. Stark-"

"One word, kid, one. Why?"

Peter couldn't see his expression with the Ironman mask on. It was so much more terrifying.

They were back on the roof, now.

Peter quickly dismissed another roof from his mind, another day, another disappointment.

"Why?!" Tony screamed. Mr. Stark hardly raised his voice.

"The warehouse" Peter was uncharacteristically quiet. Tony’d do anything to exchange this for a never-ending Star Wars marathon with his kid.

Honestly, he expected him to experience all the trauma Avengers went through, no matter how hard he tried to throw that fact to the back of his brain.

Because he caused this. Tony Stark practically kidnapped a minor, lied to his aunt, threw him into a multi-million dollar suit and made him fight captain god damn America. then came saving ferries and fighting vultures.

But what warehouse?

the very fact that he didn't know something that caused his kid (*this kid) to attempt suicide made his insides turn to stone.

"What warehouse?"

Peter looked up at him, his brown eyes swirling with panic.

Tony glared at him. "What made the friendly pg thirteen Spiderman jump off a building?"

The kid visibly curled into himself, instinctive. defensive. Damn, Tony couldn't do anything right.

"When, when you took the suit away, I went to thi-this this" the tears were flooding, messing with the kid's audio quality. "warehouse, and the vulture was there and did you know his wings are very strong? and they can cut through walls and that's what they did and and I was-"

Tony wished he was an idiot. he wished he was oblivious. Ironman wished he wasn't so painfully overconfident. he wished he didn't finish Peter's words.

"You were in there. and the building collapsed" Peter nodded, staring at the ground.

Tony felt sick.

What had he done?

-the end-

(lol nah, i’m not that evil XD, continue reading, love)

Peter had given up not crying a long time ago, but the boy still had the audacity to look away and hide his tears behind his hand. As if that could stop those moonlit streaks and drops to haunt Tony forever.

Without thinking, he hugged the weeping kid in front of him. Said kid chuckled. “That’s not a hug”

“I’m just opening the door for you” Tony finished with a melancholic smile.

Peter sat down, legs hanging above Queens. For some reason, Stark knew he wouldn’t try jumping again.

Peter sighed and looked up at him. “First, I’m so sorry, second, this isn’t your fault, third: I’m not suicidal”

Tony pulled off his helmet. “That’s a little hard to believe taking into account that you just jumped off a building without your web shooters.” Ironman sat beside him.

There it was again, the panic in Peter’s eyes. “No, please no, what I did, I wasn’t thinking and now that I am, I know that I don’t want to go I won't leave you or May or Ned or Mj or the churro lady, nightmares aren’t supposed to-”

“Nightmares?” Tony narrowed his eyes, everything slowly falling into place. This kid was battling demons the size of his own.

Peter nodded, and He sighed. “Know how you like a song? and you listen to it over and over again?”

The teenager frowned, confused, but nodded again.

“And then you start hating it, it doesn't even sound like music anymore? Try that with your nightmare”

“Sorry, Mr. Stark, but what?”

Tony reigned in the urge to sass the kid in front of him. “Play the nightmare in your head, over and over again. Painful, scary, a bit crazy but trust me, kid. I get nightmares too.” He slowed down a bit. “Play it until you get tired of watching yourself getting crushed and getting back up again. Get tired of hearing the voices repeat the same things over and over again. And you’ll see it for what it is.”

Peter cocked his head at him and grinned. How the kid still maintained that attitude was beyond him. ‘Mr. Stark, this is all sweet and Dumbledore-y of you but what exactly am I supposed to see it as?’

The billionaire rolled his eyes. “Don’t make me say it, kid,”

Chuckling Peter looked below, so many people were living their lives under him, yet the one who came to rescue him flew here from god knows where. “How did you know I was going to jump”

Tony looked straight into his eyes, no helmet. “You get a little suspicious when your kid takes his suit and swings to a roof, in the middle of the night, every night And this time decides to take it off”

Peter held his head in his hands, sighing dramatically. “Oh god, Mr. Stark. This is a whole other level of helicopter parenting” Tony glared at him and they waited in the midst of the tense silence before bursting into fits of laughter.

A/N:

YOU! YES YOU! are reading my first fanfic on tumblr, and it would make this girl Hela happy if you press the heart thingy and reblog because I SPENT 2 WEEKS ON THIS GODDAMNIT. I need a beta reader, so if you want to help me out then message me. 

 Just some clarifications:

1) i am not promoting suicide, at all. This oneshot came to be when i realized having a building drop on a 15 year old and have no one offer him a hand would mess with their brain, and have consequences, something marvel ignored in homecoming.

2) Just because we end the oneshot with both of them laughing, that in no meaning of the word means they’re “ok” But they will, eventually. (want me to write some fluff? ;) )

3) THIS WHOLE THING IS FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF PETER AND TONY. I IN NO WAY AM SAYING THAT PETER IS A WORTHLESS INSECT OR THAT TONY SHOULD BE BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING. I tried my best to think up how their perspective, and this is it.

4) This ain’t Starker, period.

Bai.