#i know some ppl hced that she left but NO

[canongf]

i've always always always had a hc that eddie's mom died when he was little and i was right. she got sick. he was six. :(

[kristailine]

Kazujun headcanon (made for the holidays ver)

I kept this one with me for so long since I thought it fits the holidays season.

Kazuya and Jun definitely got matching sneaker shoes

We all know how Kazuya is a sneakerhead and most ppl collectively hced (ironically and unironically) that Jun once got to visit Kazuya's sneaker collection vault.

At first, it left Jun distasteful as she thought the numbers of shoes that are unworn could've easily been donated to a good cause and gifted to less fortunate people around the world who could really need just one usable pair.

But seeing how enthusiastic Kazuya was with the collection, Jun settled and let it pass. She followed him around the vault as he mansplained about some of his favorites from his collections and the struggles he had to put up with trying to get some of the limited editions.

At some point, Kazuya was becoming aware of how much time he was consuming just talking about sneaker stuff with Jun and he couldn't help but feel a little conscious (something new he thought he would never feel at all) if Jun was getting bored. He didn't wanna ask outright if she was getting bored, not that he cared (he insisted in his thoughts, being the dense guy he is).

To make it more engaging with Jun, he asked if she found anything nice. Jun pointed to a plain white design which she said was her favorite among the collection. She never thought something so simple can stand out among the wide collection of colors, but its simplicity just captured her attention as she thought the design looked timeless.

Kazuya thought about it for a long time until one day, he actually did go and order a pair of the same design in Jun's size. He gifted the sneakers to her and Jun loved it (it was her first time wearing sneakers as she always just wore slip ons, flats, leather shoes, heels, and sandals as footwear).

But Jun went on and teased Kazuya how much lovelier it would be if he could also wear his pair so they could match. Kaz ofc scoffed at that bc there was no way it was gonna happen, he didn't wanna ruin his collection.

(The same day, he ordered the same design in his size and put the newly purchased white sneakers on his collection, while he took the old pair and started wearing it as Jun suggested)

Additional stuff:

Aside from having Jin, I'd like to think this pair of white sneakers is one of the stuff that was left with Jun which reminded her of Kaz. She brought it with her all the way to Yakushima, stored it in a storage rack and never used it again in fear of getting it damaged, she of course didn't want to lose it.

As a result, Jin had always grown curious why his mom never wore the pair, but it's whatever.

[danothan]

shoutout to @ceeloilights for always having thought-provoking tags on my rambles 👊 i’ve responded to it in a big batch below! it rly does paint a picture for the behind-the-scenes of hal’s family…

(my tags for context to some of these responses):

#i also wonder if jessica wanted to discourage hal from idolizing his dad #so if she kept martin away from him he would somehow forget abt it and lose interest in flying #god how fucked up is that. to keep a grieving son's late father away from him #i hope this isn't disproportionately angsty #i just feel like it's rly fucked up that she wouldn't let him see her when she was literally on her deathbed #hmm actually im looking back on these pages and im wondering if she DID say that #bc it's jack and jim that say hal can't see her bc of his 'broken promise’ #but then it's later ‘hal's fault' that she died of a complication #implying that she got so emotional abt the fact that he was a pilot that it worsened her condition #did jack and/or jim tell her?? did she ask to see hal and they refused?? #like she's DYING could you guys not have lied and pretended that hal kept his promise #she died thinking she already lost her son how do you think that makes hal feel

RESPONSE:

#i mean it also couldve been the family just doesnt have many photos of their dad in general and they thought the only other one they had was #the one martin brought up in his jets when he flew until jim found another pic of martin #but bec hes a child and a mamas boy he didnt want to fuel hals want to leave and become like their dad so he kept it a secret (@ceeloilights)

maybe it wasn’t all of their photos of martin that jessica put away, but probably all the ones with hal! maybe they still kept up portraits or even family photos with him, but the one jim gifted hal was the time he’d ditch school to go hang out with his dad on the airfields. there’s a reminder jessica would hate to keep around.

and that is fucked UP if it was jim that kept that hidden from hal. it always seemed like he was the one caught in the crossfire of everything, but it would make sense considering that when jack didn’t want hal to see their mom, jim agreed despite being torn by the decision. following what his older brother says, trying to look out for their mom, i can understand why he’d do it. but damn does that not make it hurt any less.

this in tandem to hal thinking, “i thought no one understood me. i was wrong” when jim gave him the photo, honestly stings a little. it makes me think that jim is torn between every family member. he’s a mama’s boy for sure, but he cares abt his brothers deeply. he didn’t even seem to choose a side when they fought, he just wanted them to stop fighting.

#i read it as jim just never having the time(seen w jim having to rush back to sue) or appropriate occasion to give hal the gift #but like the ANGST and GUILT of jim stowing the pic away everytime he talks to hal

i think it’s both timing and jim’s internal conflict! the family rarely keeps in touch in general (gee i wonder why), but that guilt of him not wanting hal to leave, the guilt that jim doesn’t want to fuel anything against the promise hal made to their mom… i think it’s notable that the “appropriate occasion to give hal the gift” only happened when she passed (oh god ☹️)

#i always hced hals mom pushing him away bec its her way of coping knowing the ppl she loves will die is by putting distance b/w them #she might know wat shes doing is wrong but she doesnt want hal to miss her either

i think there are aspects of this that are true in secret origins, esp keeping a distance bc of potential grief. but idk if i’d say it’s to protect hal’s feelings of missing her, it feels very much like a selfish (albeit understandable) thing to want to protect him. i always thought her overprotectiveness was the magnetic push to hal’s rebelliousness (“i thought there was nothing left to be afraid of. mom thought there was everything” / “i didn’t understand her. and she didn’t understand me.”)

#but i feel like jess wouldnt be the kind of person to fully wipe someones traces away lmao maybe #she still let the boys celebrate christmas even tho technically there jewish bec its like a tradition that they love #even if its based off of her husbands beliefs and reminds hal (and prob her) about his dads death #but ig celebrating ur husbands holiday once a year isn't the same as seeing ur dead husbands face everyday in a pic

it can go hand in hand! i don’t think she’d want to forget abt martin’s death completely ofc, after all, jessica is the one to encourage hal to light the candles in his father’s memory despite it being a catholic tradition via darkseid war (which, sidenote, isn’t it interesting that hal remembers his dad as someone that thought church was stupid anyway? i think it plays a lot into hal feeling like his mom doesn’t understand him and vice versa, but it’s smth they do regardless bc of what it symbolizes for themselves). i think choosing that holiday as smth they can use to celebrate martin’s life is a symbol in that way as well. but imagine the anniversary of his death comes around, i don’t think they’d have that same energy of family connection and understanding. jessica would take that HARD. and it’s the same thing with the photos, the constant reminder is different than making the choice to acknowledge it.

and the reason i have this hc is bc it echoes the way she treats hal’s passion. it’s not even the flying, which would ofc worry her, but she doesn’t even like that hal played with airplanes as a kid? she might not wipe every trace of her husband away from the family, but she’s definitely not allowing certain parts of it

i actually forgot i had this panel of her (presumably) explaining to hal why he can’t have his toy planes anymore. like they’re in one big box full of photos, hello?? where are you putting the box jessica??

#also i dont think jack and jim would lie to hal #like jack and hal got a rivalry but telling ur brother that he cant see his mom is like not up there Imao #but ig telling him hes the death of their mom is a shallow blow too (scapegoat hal as always lol) #i always thought bec jack was the one taking care of her it was more like a game of telephone where their mom said one thing and jacks #jealousy and hatred for hal made him think she meant something different or just thought hal didnt deserve to see her

see, the way i was thinking abt it was that it was true that the doctor said anything upsetting would worsen her condition, and it’s also true that hal is an emotional trigger for her. IF they lied, it would be to protect her, as they’ve always done, not to punish hal, and the reason i was wondering if they did was bc i’m curious how that conversation with their mom was brought up. DOES she still care abt that broken promise, even now on her death bed?? or was it that game of telephone you mentioned, where she asks where is hal, and they tell her he can’t see her, all while dancing around the (emotionally triggering) reason why. “jack won’t let you. i can’t let you either.” says more abt their choices than jessica’s. if they kept from him the fact that she was dying of cancer this whole time, i wouldn’t say it’s completely out of character for them to make the executive decision to keep it up.

#its like [jack] wasted his life putting time and effort into something taking care of something with nothing to show #then his brother shows up thinking he can say he cared for their mom when jack was the one by her side the whole time

no like that’s so fucked up 😭😭 bc it’s not just hal not understanding how much jack had sacrificed for their family, the other side of that same coin is jack not understanding that hal couldn’t take care of her bc of how much she pushed him AWAY. good lord i love a well-written dysfunctional sibling dynamic, but i forget how much it hurts me.

#like hal said jack was the one who cared for her he put his whole life on hold to come to her care while hal had to be told shes dying

it’s still insane to me that he had to FIND OUT his mom was dying of cancer, that shit doesn’t just happen overnight. from jack’s perspective, hal was the one that chose to leave the family behind, but hal sees it as never being welcomed into it. jack thinks hal is selfish for living for himself, and the wild thing is that hal is the one that escaped that toxic household. jack’s sacrifice is what makes him “selfless” in comparison, and the resentment that built up from it is hal’s fault, not the long history that created this environment to begin with. he doesn’t question why hal ran away, just that he chose between himself and his family.

and i don’t think hal was the one that didn’t want to come back either:

god it rly is such an interesting familial backstory, especially for dc. i always found it fascinating how hal has more or less come to terms with his trauma PRIOR to active canon, but it still bleeds into his characterization now. and i love that i rly can’t blame anyone, you can totally see where each person is coming from. it’s like putting a bunch of wounded animals in a cage, you know things would be different if it weren’t for the close proximity. but that’s the thing abt family isn’t it 😔 i said it before and i’ll say it again: no wonder hal ran away.

note: none of my firsthand sources of media cast jessica in a charitable light, so i will be keeping an eye out for iterations that show other sides to her. but i don’t think that negates what she’s done, or the effect it had on the boys, or how hal remembers it now. i think it just makes the family a lot more… complicated.

lemme know if this is supported/debunked anywhere, but i always thought it interesting how significant it was meant to be that jim got hal a framed photo of him and their dad. yes ofc martin’s death makes it significant, but did hal not have any other photos of him? the line “something i wish i could’ve given you a long time ago” gives a weight to the gift like i’m missing smth, like smth could’ve changed if he had. and the fact that jim was so excited to give it to hal all those years ago that he stayed up until midnight makes it feel even more significant, secretive even

what i’m saying is that i headcanon their mom took down all the photos of their dad bc she hated having the reminder. that’s why it’s especially painful for her seeing hal follows in martin’s footsteps, he’s the spitting image of his father. without him there, even in spirit thru framed photos, it puts a lot of pressure onto hal. i can see this being a part of her coddling and overprotectiveness, how she wants to hold onto what she has left. and i can also see how her later disowning him can reflect putting the photos away, how it seems almost contradictory that she wants to protect him so she tells him to never come back. it’s that duality of grief; she loves him so much that she can’t bear to look

god hal rly grew up in a fucked up household didn’t he, no wonder he ran away