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ugh I reallllyyyyy didn’t want to get in on this but like
The assumption that all atheists are people who’ve “never touched a religious text in their life” basically says to me you have a specific view of atheists and have probably not known many.
Most of them grew up IN the system and DO know the text and THAT’S why they walk away.
If you’re gonna make a whole post on ppl not using nuance with CR stuff right now the least you can do is use nuance yourself and not paint an entire group of people with a brush that TV taught you, or a bunch of white men into power *cough* Dawkins *cough* coopted a movement in a society where to not believe in god is synonymous with being immoral.
So just keep in mind, the representation of people without faith that you see on TV or twitter isn’t the majority and 9 times out of 10 isn’t correct at all.
thanks ^_^
#I learned a new word the other day#apatheism or something#b/c there isn't a word for what I am#but like I know that people who don't know what I am will paint me with the nuance-less brush of#oh you're atheist or whatever#but yeah#maybe also pick up on the nuance that Matt's putting down#that not all the Prime deities are the saammmme#can't paint them all with a brush too#just funny that so many people saying I want to be free to not worship anything rn brings so much ridicule#I'm sad ppl are taking a really fascinating complicated take on gods and such is being turned into this stupid fight#just BREATHE please#yes I'm sub-blogging a little b/c I don't want to get into it#I just want ppl to keep in mind that some people out there are ppl too#sorry I don't mean to go off but it's a sensitive point for me#something I never talk about b/c of opinions like that out there#can't wait to see my follower count drop b/c this sorta thing always does T_T#I just wanna be me and make the world a better place isn't that enough#Tria rants
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i'm trying to find the motivation to do things, but man it's been hard. i think i just overwhelmed myself again which is why i haven't been answering things here. i just have too much to do and it's stressing me out. don't worry, i'm not dropping any threads or anything, i'm just taking my time to do them. please be patient with me. i'll definitely get things answered at least by wednesday if i'm still overwhelmed with everything the next couple of days.
#* this is my unfinished symphony // ooc.#i know people are waiting on me for things and i'm sorry for being so slow#i feel bad about it but it's been so hard for me to respond to things#i'm doing my best please be patient with me#i fear i've overwhelmed myself once again and it's making it hard to be here
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#My parents are yelling at me and expecting that wow! It'll help my education#What if i just exploded#Fucking hell#I'm so fucking tired#What am i supposed to do!#And my mother keeps comparing me to people she hates#I'm sorry i just I'm so fucking tired!!!!#I can't do this#Being yelled at and sworn at every single day just because I'm there because I'm an easy target#And I'm supposed to live for this?? And for their ideal???? What the fuck#And I'm supposed to pick up the pieces after and pick myself up again after they've just bullied me#Fucking hell I'm so tired!!#And#The slurs and swearing my mother uses against me#Like I'm so tired#So tired of this shit#I'm so sorry i did the stupid thing of being born i guess!#I'm so sorry you decided to have kids because you thought they were just slaves to run about and make them do whatever#I feel so so loved by my parents!!!! :D#And you know the worst thing now#An hour of them shouting and swearing later#I just have to dust myself off#Pretend my souls not being ripped out#And go back to work because the fucking exam won't wait!#Goddamn what's the point of living if it's like this#Tw vent
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dude.
#jaerambles#okay once again . you don't have to expand all that#but like dude. i was talking about how i feel so STUCK and it's also mostly my fault like. i can't commit to the SIMPLEST stuff#what about growing one plant. what about going outside and playing on my phone for 10 minutes. what about setting an alarm#if it has nothing to do with work or obligation i just don't !! i haven't been drawing or writing or Anything i just . wait for other peopl#to tell me what to do. and i know it's like . a miserable unfocused existence. i feel bad!#i can't be self directed i don't Want anything bad enough#and i just wait for things to come to me. and then they don't . and so i'm just stuck.#IT SHOULD BE SO EASY!!! DOING THINGS IS SUPPOSED TO BE EASY!!!#i'm. DEPRESSED!!! but most importantly i am just like. i feel like i'm giving up#i don't . have goals i don't have wants. i only leave the house when other people tell me to. THERE HAS TO BE MORE TO LIFE!!!#i feel . so bad. i feel unwell.#i'm also like. very lonely. which is not exactly helping#sorry guys. i'll start dming people again my bad. i just like. don't have as much to talk about so i'm afraid of being boring#or just like. a waste of people's time
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🫧
#tw: vent#so my mother is basically mean to me like 99 % of the time and we literally argue every single day#and i have been trying my hardest to not pay any heed to what she tells me but recently she told me something that really#made me feel so incredibly hurt and stupid idek how to put thaf into words#i avoid sharing things with her because she makes me feel bad about even the tiniest most unnecessary thing i share with her#so basically i have this one friend who was staying away from home for uni and she lives near me so i always try to be there for her#becayse i know how lonely it gets for her and i always go everytime my friends need me and my mom hates that#she makes me feel like being nice to my friends and others is the dumbest thing on this planet and that im stupid#but if my sister does it she's an angel#i was just waiting for my friend to figure things out as she was moving back home after uni ended so we could go look at internships#toghether#and she went home and got a job and while im happy for her she didn't even mention anything about it which made me sad enough but when i#told my mother about it she made me feel worse she said that was not very nice what she did you did so much for her and i told her#that's alright i dont mind and she said that my friend used me for her benefit and that I'm stupid for being nice to people#because according to her every nice thing that ive done is stupid and nothing i have done is going to make her feel proud or is enough#she qould NEVER say this to my sisters EVER#aah fuck this became too long#im so sorry if anyone came across this#but yes my mother is literally my biggest enemy most times ngl#she makes me feel like i wish i was not alive#it hurts to see my friends have great relationship with their moms and sisters#:')
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Hiatus
I am going on hiatus for a bit more. I really really hoped the stuff that have been going on lately were already "sorted out" but, uhm... they aren't. I need to take a bit more time offline once again, and try to work things out.
Thank you for your patience ❤
Wren
#EDIT: I've deactivated my IG for a bit because it wasn't helping at all. I'll be back there but I need time#wren text tag#somehow issues from mid July/early August have managed to get worse. Like I'm not even surprised bc I'm used to it but GIRL . What the fuck#“it's finally summer”+“can't wait to draw!” * gets 3 hiatus in a row * maybe drawing or summer isn't really meant to be 🤨🤔#I hate having to log-in to post a hiatus message and then dissapear again when I'm supposed to post my doodles n have fun#Feels like one of those jesters that appears at luncheon to entertain the royal court and then they go missing for the rest of the month#bc I'm trying very hard not to hide in my shell + having a bit more presence here to post my artwork#and somehow I fail at both like fucking heck. How can you be so bad at this.#but in short I won't be here to answer stuff and being silly or whatever people expect me to do#because if you're here for the silly stuff. MAN. I'm am sorry but I don't feel silly at all.#Somebody once said “the horrors are never ending yet I remain silly” but I forgot the “remain silly” part#And if you're here for drawings. I don't even have time and I don't feel like drawing at all. Idk which one is worse#The bakery hangs up the “closed today” so people know they have to go to buy bread somewhere else. Same here. But it won't last a day#idk why the bread analogy. Guess I'm a birb after all#this is also the closest thing to a vent post I will ever write and I managed to say nothing at all. Vagueposting about vent. Good job Wren#tw: vent#tagging in case somebody like me needs to have some tags filtered#the hiatus will go on also a bit longer because the last few weeks my mental health suffered a lot and I know my limit#also this post was queued. If I see I can still be active before publishing I will delete it otherwise see for yourself#also queue doesn't work ig like I programmed this for 9 pm hopefully it will be up by then and not any other random time
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napoleon movie was not good tbh
#script was not good didn't make a good use of history & didn't really justify being 2hr40min long imo#it had some nice cinematography in parts but.#idk maybe I'm just being mean but even as a long historical movie enjoyer i wasn't a fan#thoughts#i felt like sometimes also it was trying to do that sort of modern humor slant to history thing which Can work (eg the favourite) but didn'#also it was weird abt the french revolution in a way I didn't rlly enjoy but I'd have to chew that one over before making any serious crit#& my knowledge of napoleon is v patchy so I can't really say anything there except it didn't really feel like it developed him much at all#which. idk how. it feels like it should have done#overall an extremely meh altho sometimes pretty film tbh. idk#<- i did smile seeing the rain at waterloo though thank you victor hugo she is like a celebrity to me#sorry adding more as I wait for the bus but. how do cut the entire peninsular war & invasion of italy etc etc & still have it drag#also again i felt like the dialogue was quite bad but maybe I'm being too mean#esp bc the other people in the theater did seem to enjoy it ajskdjkgky. so who knows#wait i Will say that I did quite like the mysuc though. that was good.#*music#also we got a ship interior w middies at the end#the french revolution bit really did leave a bad taste in my mouth though
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my god i am ADORING the fontaine world quests so much they are so good
#personal stuff#thorn plays genshin#i love how they all show different sides of fontaine while also being connected!!!! and we get pieces of the puzzle with each quest!!#all the alice in wonderland imagery too. caterpillar........ also lyris being called the ''red empress''.....like the red queen perhaps?#and taking everyone back to the ordo after each quest is so cool and satisfying because it really feels like it's building to something#and we'll finally get to see the whole puzzle and figure everything out and AUUGH.#just the whole doomsday clock + the ??? domain talking about the apocalypse and how no more civilizations will be made#and caterpillar's comment that maybe we're already living in the apocalypse. HMM. maybe we are#jsut AUUGH. it's so so so cool. i love lore :]#though each one is supremely fucked up in different ways. and i love it#ann's whole thing with Stories and how what stories are told about you shape who you are as a person#and all the alice in wonderland stuff in her quest#the whole thing with elynas and jakob in seymour's quest. plus the book of revealing with canotila.#then everything about the Master that we learn from caterpillar???#me going on the wiki like hey what the fuck is going on. and going WAIT THE INSTITUTE AND THE ORDO ARE TWO DIFFERENT THINGS#okay that makes more sense. the institute split and the ordo was made of the people who believed in the abyss and apocalypse stuff#OH MY GOD ALAIN AND MARY-ANN ARE SIBLINGS. sorry this is not a huge reveal i just didn't know what their connection was#i'm not reading all the artifact descriptions sorry </3#anyway i'm psyched i love siblings.#ALAIN MADE HER A ROBOTIC DOG TO PROTECT HER. cries and explodes forever i love you sibligns. wtf#but yea the master being a fucked up rebirth combo of lyris and rene.#and caterpillar possibly being created from the master's memory of carter who was also ''prepped for rebirth'' by rene before his dissolvin#NO BUT ACTUALLY WHAT THE FUCK. in ann's story lyris giving up her ''time'' to freeze narcissus. what the fuck was that about#with the context that she and rene dissolved and were stripped of personality to become the Master which caterpillar calls narzissenkreuz#?????????#god. remember when i said i felt like i needed a corkboard and red string to figure this stuff out. still true#i could just read the wiki but the black + white contrast makes my head hurty. thank you <3
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I've been so excited about house of the dragon that I forgot that the dragons will in fact be dying in large numbers.
#🐇#I was so wrapped up in thinking about all of the dragons that are going to be added in this season and I forget what the fucking plot is#I just like conveniently don't think about the dragon pit and how I'll need to probably like actually be sedated for that#....I'm literally about to cry just thinking about it lmfao listen.#my friends have been making fun of me for this since GOT I know they're cgi I get it#I can't explain it to you I am EXTREMELY emotionally attached to literally all of the dragons in this world literally all of them#even the cannibal. is the cannibal going to be added even? idk#I was being sent memes about drogon literally months after GOT ended because people thought it was funny to make me cry#if it's one thing that I am extremely passionate about it is dragons in any world. targaryens too but like second#so sorry to everyone I speak to they're gonna be getting targaryen history lessons. and I need to get back to my valyrian lessons#anyway.....I'm very excited for tonight. so completely shocked to see that there are team green and team black fights still happening#I get why they did it from like a pr standpoint but I feel like that GREATLY misses the overall point#and also.........................look at the family tree y'all like it's no secret how this will end#can't wait until they cover my man maegor's story then we will see who the real targaryen fans are
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Hey hello can i be sad on main or will the heavens unleash 7 thousand ravenous hawks upon me
#river rambles#vent post#tw for basically everything bellow just saying it now#sorry the last 8 years of not a single reason to live are getting to me <3#i hate being alive i hate being trans I hate being autistic and not able to work like a normal person#to provide my transition to myself instead of having to rely on parents that kiind of support me? (dad) or are straight up pulling -#the 'you're making MEEE SUICIDAL!' card (mom)#i hate not being able to talk to people like a normal person#it's not even just the autism anymore i feel like i've been the worst version of me for such a long time i dont even know where to start#dysphoria is so fucking bad and getting worse every single day and any semblance of trans positivity winds up feeling toxic#like even body neutrality feels like an insult. im at a point where i want to tear myself apart just when i'm sitting still#i hate being told to wait for things to happen#the dreaded 'it'll get better'#it hasnt#it's been EIGHT. FUCKING. YEARS#nothing helps. i've exhausted every option within reach. no words of encouragement help at all#literally the only OPTION is to wait. and i've had! ENOUGH OF IT!#I've dreaded pride every year because it feels more and more like i'm living a lie being there. im not PROUD of being trans.#All i feel about it is misery. All the time. I hate my body so fucking much i cant do a single thing i want to do#most of my early years after figuring out im trans i tried to just ignore it and focus on pride about my sexuality#since i couln't transition then anyway#but as time went on and i became an adult and there's still not a single glimpse of light on the horizon. I can't focus on it anymore#because you know. those things are interconnected. So now i just feel like an unlovable piece of shit!#Like i will never be what i was meant to be. what i want to look like.#and i dont even want to try for any manner of relationship before that . because even if anyone DID like the current version of me#that's not even me#birth is a curse and existence is a prison etcetera
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#rant cw#🌙.txt#i'm genuinely so scared rn 😃 i'm trying to distract myself and have fun but it's so hard#like. i know i'm privileged bc at least i have a safe place to stay and i could make it here before everything got worse#and i know there are people going through much worse than me#but i'm TERRIFIED bc there's a high chance we might actually lose everything this time bc this flood is SO much worse than the last one#and if we lose everything then what the fuck are we gonna do...#how many times are we gonna have to deal with this kind of situation#i couldn't sleep bc i was too anxious and now i'm tired#and i just saw a video of a bunch of cows being DRAGGED by the fcking water and they looked so scared :(#i keep crying i feel so powerless#bc literally the only thing i can do is wait and pray that the damage won't be bad to the point where we can't recover from it#i'm sorry i keep posting about this and again i know i'm more privileged than a LOT of people#but i just need to vent bc i honestly have never felt this scared in my life#i'll try to at least take a nap now tho. i need some rest
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why would they schedule the canada game at the same time as the march madness final?
#it's literally so mean to me specifically#and it's not like the breaks are long enough in either one for me to flip back and forth#:( i'm gonna end up watching mm sorry#the thing about basketball is it's all action all the time#like you don't sit around waiting for people to score#like how it is in soccer and hockey#like i am rooting for south carolina for a variety of reasons#even tho it also goes against my bracket#also what is with the IIHF website being shitty to navigate and also listing things in military time#i used to be good at doing the math and calculating wsl times have made me worse at 24 to 12 hour times#please don't yell at me for being a dumb american i took ap calc#and listen i know now that you just scroll down to get to the live scores#but a few too many times i have ended up in a different division's women's worlds#this wouldn't be a problem if ESPN would buy the rights to this tourney#bc then they wouldn't program over mm#eyeroll anyways
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One big mistake people make is deciding that because someone they don't like enjoys something, that mean the something is bad
Easy example from my own life, Max who I'm no longer friends with and just... there were elements of a decent person in there once, but I don't think so anymore... anyway, Max likes Infected Mushroom
So my dad and my Mr Dumbass of a friend decided that Infected Mushroom is a bad band and it's like...
Mr Dumbass, you've been to a concert of there's with me and Max and another person (didn't care for the way the venue did things), you like them or at least have liked them... I'm pretty sure you introduced them to Max
They didn't become a bad band magically because one idiot likes them
Like people just lose the ability to judge things on merit when there's a chance to shit on something that someone they don't like enjoys and... it mostly screws you over and makes you look like a fool, you know?
So try not to do that, try not to shit on something just cause someone you don't like likes it
#cause it would be hard for me to say specific people here; but I certainly see it happen#and it's a trap that even smart people fall into#also don't forget that maybe people you like actually enjoy whatever it is and you're being an asshole to them for no reason#like evaluate things based off their merits; that's all I'm arguing for#anyway; in other news Max enjoyed Infected Mushroom wrong#see... he hate anything with vocals (unless it was something like U2 that his mom played him when he was young)#he had this idea he was enlightened for not liking vocals because... well cause he was a snob and liked feeling smart#so a lot of their best tracks he couldn't stand and would skip#and like listen... they've got some good instrumental tracks for sure#but sorry something like Becoming Insane grabs me a hell of a lot more because it actually speaks to me#also like... voice is an instrument... and it's one I have access to#I honestly often find myself singing the chorus to Wish; in fact anytime 'the game' comes up; all it does is triggers me to sing that#'I play the game; the one that will bring me to my end; I'm waiting for the rain to wash who I am'#I'd sing the rest of it but I don't have it memorized other than stray lines like#... well I know it as being like#'I want to - to - to -... and to bring it all back; I want to - rewind - - - - - and enjoy the consequence'#so you see why I can sing either of the main verses and only have the chorus#but nah; Max is an idiot and enjoys them wrong so I don't really care about his opinion#doesn't make them a bad band dummies; one of you even likes them#don't be 5; don't just go opposite of what someone else likes to spite them
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its just a con exclusive, other shows do it all the time, only the people at the con get to see it and cant film it, its a very small amount of people compared to the fandom over all so theres probably nothing too worry about
Thank you for the additional info!!!! I mean... There evidently are bsd fans participating to the con who are very much talking about the things there discussed so I don't have many hopes the adapted novel (or more likely lack of thereof) will stay a secret, but I guess we'll wait and see how much of the episode is revealed. Thank you still!!!
#Like apart from everything I do recognize it's not an issue for everyone.#I know there's people who are more than okay with learning new details without watching the thing#and the people who go at the con are more than in their rights to share what they see since a lot of people probably do want to know#It's just. Not my preferred way to experience the media I guess but we'll see about it#hopefully Anon is right and there won't be many spoilers anyway#bsd#bsd s5#people asks me stuff#Sorry for the rest of unanswered asks btw... I've been in the process of moving from the dorm the last days-#n top of being stuck with studying for an upcoming exam so I'm afraid they'll have to wait a little more ;;;;;;#I will try to get to them as soon as possible
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CW: vent in tags (I'm sorry idk Tumblr etiquette yet-)
unfortunately a lot of the corny self help advice turns out to be true but the thing is you have to come to those conclusions yourself otherwise it just sounds dismissive and dumb
#THIS IS SO TRUE!#I hear myself recommending advice I straight out dismissed#the magnus archives#tma#Mainly bcs even though I've gone thro similar things idk how to confort others (I don't know how I found comfort before)#It feels fake when I'm told to do it#And ig part of me doesn't want it to be true. To be that easy. Like what I'm feeling is real. It's not just a bit of low mood#It's depression and it's hurts me. It is a part of my life and I hate it#But it can't be fixed by just some deep breaths or positive affirmations right? It's more serious than that#I want to get better but part of me doesn't want it to be as simple as that because that would mean all that time I was just being dramatic#And what would it make all this? Pointless? Pathetic?#It feels fake anyways. Being told to do something. My brain's cynical so will find any and all flaws with the suggestion#And I just can't do positive affirmations. It's feels so so fake and like you're lying to yourself#And then it feels like you're being egotistical and self absorbed. Like oh look at me I'm so great and amazing. I just can't#I feel like I've gone off topic-#But like when someone else suggests something I can often dismiss it out if hand because I can list all the reasons it wouldn't work for me#But sometimes when you find it yourself - even if you know it's been recommended before - it works better#I guess it's because you've chosen to give it a try willingly?#Idk I'm still tryna find stuff that helps#Is this the kinda stuff you should post if Tumblr? What are the rules for like...vents ig?#This may be kinda triggering for some people uhhh content warning?#Shit but like you can't move tags so I can't add one at the top uhh-#Wait solution!#Okay well yknow sorry if you read all that and yea uhh imma head to bed now or pretend to :D
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guys i am going to have a breakdown why do i have to be so boring and lame :[ i fucking hate having a job and school and shit
#some of the more Traditionally “Cool” ppl i know wanted to see if i wanted to spontaneously hang out rn. like. yes obviously#however. i am in bed. I've already taken my sleep med. i have to wake up to leave for work at FIVE AM.#so no. i can't be cool and interesting ive actually been regularly going to bed at like 7 fucking o clock which means#that i can't socialize at night like all of the interesting and normal teenagers and i also have no time to do any hobbies#just me rambling again#sorry to be fucked up on main (no im not this blog has been my diary since middle school 😔) but my number one very deep seeded insecurity#genuinely one of my biggest Things I'm Just Fucked Up About is. being “boring” or uninteresting or lame or not fun or .. you get the gist#so the fact that i go to sleep nowadays before 9pm most nights and have zero social life and zero romantic interests and barely even hobbie#doesn't help and sadly my dear friends trying to include me in something Remotely Interesting and my being too fucking boring and lame to#be able to participate in causing me to spiral :(#luckily the sleep med im waiting to kick in is also uncoincidentally a med meant to help me deal with anxiety attacks. so like. ill be fine#just a big insecurity ive found incredibly easy to trigger in the past few weeks unfortunately#i should have been more interesting in high school and snuck out and partied and did all the things#unfortunately i dedicated at least three years of that time dedicating every ounce of my being towards a person other than myself#so now i have to deal with bullshit like 6am shifts and college workloads and the fact that i am increasingly unlikely to#1) be invited to any “parties” and 2) be at a party where there *aren't* people literally doing coke#sigh. anyways
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