#i know nirvanas not metal but this guy is 100% a metal boy

[mackmp3]

learning breed by nirvana cos i worked up the nerve and asked one of the cool metal guys if their band needs someone else and he said he'd ask. breed is actually so cool and not to hard either so yay

[merlucide]

What’s their taste in music?

notes: playing around with sizing hehe-

characters: Barou, Sendou, Chigiri, Bachira, Reo, Oliver, Hiori, Otoya

barou shoei

classical music 100%

Cmon my dude mediates- how obvious does it needa be? I feel like piano would be his favorite but also really likes cello or other deep string instruments. He normally just puts on the default classical music playlists lmao. Though I do think he would like Red hot chilli peppers for some reason. Definitely hard no on metal or anything really with intense drums. He can’t stand the loud aggressive music, he thinks it’s unhinged and frenetic.

sendou shuto

sendou listens to rap cus he thinks it makes him cooler💀 I can see it so clearly omg- 

Listens to Eminem obviously, and his favorite song from him is rap god. His hype song is NEW ORLEANS by BROCKHAMPTON. He feels so badass listening to it lmao. Though what he really likes is pop, Brittney spears, Dua lipa, Lady Gaga, etc etc.

chigiri hyoma 

Okay I can see Chigiri liking a few types of music for like different moods yk.

I think he’d like XXXTENTACION, he listens to his more ‘intense’ songs when he runs. He likes YuNg BrAtZ, when he wants to listen to depressing music he likes Orlando. 

He’d like rock too, The white stripes and Nirvana would be his go toos.

When he’s getting really into his workout he puts on Disturbed and occasionally SlipKnot when he’s tryna push himself.

ALSO I CAN 100% SEEING HIM LISTENING TO SLEEP TOKEN?!? OMG YEAH???

(RIP XXX.)

bachira meguru

Hear me out okay.

Voicaloid. 

IK IK- I think Bachira would really like the fast pace and excitement in their songs. He just likes Hyperpop, it’s like an energy boost he don’t need anymore energy

His all time favorites are Rin Rin Signal and Poppippo.

ALSO THE LIVING TOMBSTONE. UGH HE WOULD LIKE THEM RIGHT???? Discord would be on loop 24/7 are u kidding me

mikage reo

I think that since he grew up classy n rich he’d listen to classical music and such. he really likes Violin/Viola. Listening to it brings him great comfort and peace. Reo really likes Jazz too. Obviously Reo explored other types of music to see what else there is .definitely did it as an act of ‘rebellion’ lmao-  He isn’t really a fan of metal or rock but likes Alt. I can see him listening to The neighborhood or Radiohead. He also likes Adele.

aiku oliver

likes the more chill stuff, like Noah Kahan or Big thief. He’s a pretty laid back guy and doesn’t feel the need to rage through music lmao- Though I can see him liking Chase Atlantic. And I know for a fact if you put on any cunty music he’d know all of the lyrics to the songs. Ayesha Erotica, Chase Icon, or even porn-ish singerslike cupcakke he’d know the words to em💀

hiori yo

..

death metal.

..

Like we talking cannibal corpse, the fallen prophecies, and on calm days, SlipKnot.

he gotta cope somehow ig😶

Like you could ask him what he’s listening too and expect him to listen to like Drake or sum and he’s like ‘oh I’m listening to Murderous Rampage by Cannibal Corpse’. 

.. 😶

Like dawg wut😭

otoya eita 

he’d listen to Drake, Lil Uzi Vert and Kanye West without doubt. 

Pls he’s the most basic, generic, un-unique ‘frat boy’ ever, of course he’d listen to them. He thinks he all hot stuff jamming out to em, all dripped out in his basic ass fit, and ugly beanie, ew. Ugh I hate this hoe🙄 (jk he’s bbg 🤭) also I’m not hating on any of these artists, I like their music- DONT TAKS NUFFIN PERSONAL PLS

lemme know if u wanna pt2 or whatever mkay

made March 17th 2024

[where-is-aslan]

What kind of music do they listen to?

Fandom: Call Of Duty.

Characters: Kyle “gaz” Garrick, John “soap” Mactavish, Simon ”ghost” Riley, John ”bravo 0-6” Price.

Genre: Headcanons (random)

☆•°.•.°•.. ☆•°.•.°•.. ☆•°.•.°•.. ☆•°.•.°•..

Kyle “gaz” Garrick

Gaz is ACTUALLY the type of guy who can listen to everything. I totally see him listening to Nirvana in the morning, 2Pac the day, and Adele the night. Mainly into american rap and hip-hop tho, probably a huge Gorillaz fan.

I KNOW he hates phonk, i just do. He really hates it. He surprisely really likes Price's music tastes, and always ask him for new songs recommandations. Vibes with John because they have similar tastes when it comes to pop.

Always listens to music when he's working out, walking outside or chilling, always has earphones on him. ALWAYS. Definitely has many playlists for every situations.

Used to listen to electro and techno all the time. Was so sure he could rap like Eminem when he was in middle school...

Simon “ghost” Riley

This man has serious anger issues, and that's the only reason why i think he listens to metal. He's a chill metalhead tho, like, he doesn't go to festivals or any event. A Slayer and Cannibal Corpse lover, he likes it fast and hard.

And surprisely, im 100% sure bro loves metalcore and nu metal (he probably listens to Slipknot religeously...) Enjoys jazz and sad rock songs when he's home alone. Radiohead saved his life. Says he hates everyone's music tastes except Price's.

Pretends he doesn't listen to music, and he never does in public. (And he actually doesn't often, only when he's off duty.)

Used to be a Nirvana teenager, the basic Kurt Cobain lover. Probably tried to learn how to play guitar when he was younger, and sucessed to have a decent level.

John “soap” Mactavish

Johnny is a radio music tastes guy. He listens to whatever comes on the radio. Harry Styles? Of course. Mäneskin? Pretty sure he loves them. Even Lady Gaga? HELL YEAH!

But, we all agreed that our Johnny boy is a pround scottish man. And i love to think that he actually listens to that angry scottish music. 100% Sure he loves Imagine Dragons and Ed Sheeran... He thinks Ghost's music tastes are cool as fuck.

He hates earphones and headphones, he needs everyone to listen to his playlist with him. He randomly starts to sing, whistle or hum when he's slightly bored.

He never tried to do anything with music, he knows damn well he can't sing even if he loves to do it as a joke.

John “bravo 0-6” Price

Good old rock. A good Black Sabbath on Spotify while he drinks some whiskey at home is always good. Knows a lot of rock (and some 80's metal) bands, thats why he gets along with Ghost's tastes so well. He's a nostalgic man, he has tones of vinyls at home.

Kyle influenced what he listens to a lot, im sure they made a playlist for eachother. Really likes Gorillaz just because Kyle loves it. Nothing more to say, this man's tastes are perfects.

Usually only listen to music when he's alone, but won't hesitate to give song recommandations if you ask nicely. If you're way younger than him, he'll laugh and tell you won't like any of that because you're not old enough to apreciate best things.

Used to wanna be in a band when he was a teen, but he quickly gave up. Can play the acoustic guitar pretty well and has a nice voice.

☆•°.•.°•.. ☆•°.•.°•.. ☆•°.•.°•.. ☆•°.•.°•..

That's all for now, i hope you enjoyed these silly headcanons :)

-Aslan, your local metalhead.

[messytoybox]

Grim reaper music headcanons (either vibes of music they listen to, instruments, and artist)

Grelle

-Absolutely keeps up the top 40 hits.

-Currently I’m so hot by Chrissy Chlapeka is her hyper fixation.

-Not now I’m in my villain era (plays Natalia Kills)

-Knows every Nicki Minaj lyric

-Dancing along to music videos

-Top Artist are: Lady Gaga, Madonna, Blondie,Lizzo and Kim Petras

William

-Music taste is still stuck in 1984

-Cassette tape hoarder

-Low key male manipulator music

-Crying while listening to Blasphemous Rumors by Depeche Mode (definitely not me projecting lol)

-Does own a synth

-Top Artist: Joy Division, The Cure, Depeche Mode,Dead on a Sunday, She wants Revenge

Ronald

-2010 scene core

-Ke$ah stan

-If a song is not 130 bpm he ain’t listening

-We came here to fuckin party jamz

-White boy that thinks he can rap

-Top Artist: LFMAO, Ke$ah, 3 oh! 3, Bestie Boys, Cobra Starship

Othello

-HATSUNE MIKU?!

-Don’t give this man the aux will play 100 gecs and destroy your speakers

-Or will play really weird 1980s new wave

-Likes the happier The Cure songs

-New Order is better then Joy Division sorry boss

-Owns multiple otamatones

-Top Artist: Oingo Boingo, 100 gecs, The Cure, New Order,Graveyardguy

Alan

-I listened to them before it was cool

-I need room for my twirly hippie music

- It’s for the aesthetic Eric

-Vinyl collector

-Drunkenly screaming Kate Bush lyrics

-Did have a ukelele cover phase

-Dolly Parton can do no wrong

-Did introduce everyone to Mother Mother but now thinks they’re too mainstream

-Top Artist: Kate Bush, Fleetwood Mac, Fun,Dolly Parton,Metric

Eric

-The cheesites and sappiest love songs known to man

-Or classic rock

-“What do you mean we can’t play careless whisper at our wedding Al?”

-Likes older Sam Smith

-Top Artist: Lionel Richie, Wham!, Sam Smith, Amy Whinehouse, Queen

Ludger

-Classic Punk or Grunge

-Is the guy that will questions you if you wear a Nirvana shirt

-Plays the drums

-Angst angst angst

-Top Artist: Nirvana, Soundgarden, The Ramones, Dead Kennedys, Alice In Chains

Sascha

-The token metal head

-Or 2000s emo

-Can absolutely do the scream

-Will absolutely introduce you to new bands

-Ludger and then sing bring me to life on kareoke night

-Top Artist: Metallica, Paramore,BabyMetal, Evanescence, My Chemical Romance

[ssobsinternallyy]

hi guys im bringing you my 2012 angst headcanons for the boys because they're silly

on the topic of ANGER:

donnie's anger is very loud, but not like- in the raph way loud. more like "i'm gonna lose my fucking shit" loud. he probably laughs like a fucking maniac when he's pushed over the edge angry. probably screams a lot and doesn't take a single break from screaming. like, take every pent up anxious thought this man has ever had and channel it into this anger. bro is a mess. he probably cries after every anger meltdown he has.

okay okay leo. leo's anger is a lot quieter. he probably funnels all his depression into his anger when he's like, honest to god, genuinely angry. the most you'll probably get out of him 90% of the time is irritation or disappointment. but when he is mad, lord have mercy on your soul. he probably goes to his room to brood after his little anger tantrums and then apologizes later.

everyone knows raph's anger. big loud and scary. he yells a lot of insults and shit. very very very VERY defensive when he's mad. can and will beat the shit out of you and won't feel bad about it unless you're someone he genuinely gives a shit about. after he's done screaming whatever he's mad about, he'll stomp off and listen to music or something. the most he'll do is text you an "im sorry" and then not talk to you for a good few hours.

let's talk about mikey. oh my god, mikey. this man is IMPOSSIBLE to get mad. you CANNOT piss him off. HOWEVER, WHEN YOU DO? bro. you're FUCKED. oh my GOD you are fucked. mikey's anger is COLD. not like, his fake, borderline irritation anger. no, not that. @turrondeluxe has been getting a lot of asks about mikey having anger issues and i SO SO SO agree. the worst part is, he won't say a FUCKING WORD to you, if he's angry. like, if he's fighting you, he will not speak. he can be quiet when he needs to be. and oh my god this man terrifies me. let him go apeshit plEASE. he'd go to his room and blast the most ear-bleeding death metal in existence until he's pushed all of the bad emotions back into their little box in the back of his mind. (as for the aftermath, he'll probably act completely normal the next day, after he's done bottling it all up again.)

more under the cut (tw for eating disorders, mentions of suicidal thoughts/ideations, and just genuinely sad stuff) (also sorry for tagging you fer LOL EVERYONE GO FOLLOW THEM)

some extra headcanons because i like them a lot they make me silly

mikey:

- mikey actually loves reading. he's dyslexic and can't read, but he loves forcing his brothers to read to him. (they secretly love reading to him)

- he probably struggled with an eating disorder of some kind at some point. probably almost killed him too

- also on top of the eating disorder: probably why he’s so much shorter than his bros (bad genes combined with not eating enough [or eating too much to the point of throwing up])

- 100% a metalhead. (i also think he listens to like, green day and nirvana. probably a huge gorillaz guy too. he just listens to whatever)

- master of manipulation. he might not be able to do math but he can crack your brain open like a walnut and pick you apart.

- has a lot of weird not-directly-suicidal thoughts about something happening to him. like "what if that train just hit me and i died" type shit.

- he keeps cat food on his belt so he can feed stray cats in alleyways :3

- raph is his favorite brother. raph is also the only one who knows Just How Much Shit (tm) mikey bottles up. they have a sworn pact to keep it in between themselves because leo and donnie just dont Get It like raph does. and mikey listens to raph and talks to raph and FUCK YOU IF YOU THINK RAPH IS ABUSIVE HE LOVES HIS BABY BROTHER‼️

- he loves april so so so so so much they do everything together. he cries indefinitely depending on how hurt or sad april is.

- gossip king. he keeps tabs on EVERYTHING

- he LOVES hot chocolate.

- trans guy (thanks fer i stole this hc from you)

- “i like everyone as long as they’re nice to me”

- he’s leatherhead’s little baby. LH is like, fourth favorite family member next to raph, donnie, and leo.

- speaks spanish (and russian for some reason?? idk it seemed like a funny headcanon) along with japanese and english obviously

- only texts in slang terms for some reason. donnie’s like, the only one who can semi decipher what he’s saying half the time

- after getting over his ED with the help of raph, leo, and donnie, he begins to treat his body a little kinder. he trains with raph in the morning, and slowly gets his booyah back!

raph:

- he only talks to mikey. he plays up the whole "mehmehmeh i hate mikey he's annoying" in front of leo and donnie but the moment they're alone they are best friends. mikey listens. he listens and he understands and he doesnt get mad at raph and raph loves him so much for that.

- his banter with leo is just petty. it's his second favorite way to blow off steam.

- his first favorite way is to punch old reliable (the punching bag)

- second best cook in the entire household

- he gossips with casey about people at casey's highschool.

- speaking of casey, he likes to spar with casey a lot. not train like he does with his brothers

- was passively suicidal for a long time because of some bad shit he was going through. he only just started realizing he needed help after realizing that MIKEY needed help

- he loves dogs. contrary to popular belief, he likes golden retrievers. (i also hc that he likes chihuauas tho)

- he likes soft indie music. (also probably a huge nirvana fan)

- iced tea lover

- bisexual as fuck

- speaks spanish cause he watches too many telenovelas

- trains regularly, treats his body like a temple.

leo:

- he likes reptiles! snakes, lizards, and little frogs are his favorite :3

- green tea drinker (he likes all tea except iced tea, but green tea is his favorite. chai is a very close second though)

- anxiety 9000% percent of the time, it gets better as he gets older though

- he’s allergic to peanuts probably. he strikes me as a peanut allergy guy

- he loves milk!!! he fucking loves milk!! drinks it every chance he gets!!!

- classical music nerd. (secretly a theater kid as well, has the entire grease soundtrack memorized)

- almost killed himself once (karai stopped him in time and they talked about it. he never tried again)

- donnie and him have the closest relationship. he likes that donnie doesn’t start fights for fun or lose interest in whatever he’s talking about quickly. (not that mikey actually loses interest, but it feels that way cause mikey hates eye contact. makes leo feel like he’s not actually listening.)

- he secretly really loves ICK. mikey always leaves her in his care when he’s off doing something else

- banned from mikey’s kitchen

- karai is his emotional support sister

- reads to mikey on a daily basis

- owner of the most popular captain ryan x reader fanfic on ao3

- kind of bullies his body by pushing it way past its limit at times, but mikey’s helping him with that

- nearsighted

- token straight brother (ik the transfem leo hcs are great.. but its funny to think about him being the only cis straight guy in his household…)

donnie:

- aroace king.

- treats his body like trash (getting better at going to sleep at reasonable hours with april’s help)

- HE LOVES MICE!!!! any kind of rodent actually. (also bunnies)

- black coffee drinker.

- can speak like four different languages fluently. has the third best understanding of japanese and kanji next to leo and mikey (mikey’s being the best because he retains the most of what splinter taught)

- not very spiritual at all but tries his best.

- probably the most depressed out of all of his brothers (pro tip: don’t compare depression guys, just saying he most definitely struggled the most with depression)

- doesn’t have a favorite brother. loves them all equally.

- got over his weird crush on april after realizing that it was probably just him wanting to feel normal. they’re besties now though

- would belittle everyone at a really low point in his life, got help though :D 👍 (he still apologizes about it to this day)

- also banned from mikey’s kitchen (still a better cook than leo)

- most of his inventions are stupid things his brothers though would be funny if he made (50% of the time they blow up in his face, but it’s still fun to mess around.)

- casey is the only one not allowed in his lab without supervision LMAO

- any bad depressive episodes he has usually ends in a turtle pile (HIS BROTHERS FUCKING LOVE HIM SO MUCH THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO SO SO MUCH FIGHT ME RAHHHH)

- he wears his goggles 100% of the time now.

- surprisingly has really good eyesight. the best out of his brothers.

- and lastly, he loves sweet things. even though he’s a black coffee drinker, he loves pastries and asks mikey to make him little sweet things all the time (mikey always agrees!)

thanks for reading this long ass post :3

[whatilistenedtoatwork]

Last 100 Songs on my Radio Show

Around a year ago, I was invited to make a weekly radio show by a friend who had set up an online radio station. A year on, the radio station has now ceased to be. Here's a list of the last 100 songs I played on my show.

The Mountain Goats – This Year

Boogie Down Productions – My Philosophy

Aphex Twin – Windowlicker

Bob Dylan – Sad-Eyed Lady Of The Lowlands

Grandmaster Flash – White Lines

Big Daddy Kane – Ain’t No Half-Steppin’

Nirvana – All Apologies

The Shirelles – Will You Love Me Tomorrow?

Belle & Sebastian – The Boy With The Arab Strap

Junior Murvin – Police & Thieves

The Magnetic Fields – I Don’t Want To Get Over You

They Might Be Giants – I’ve Got A Match

Sleaford Mods – Five Pound Sixty

Digable Planets – Where I’m From

Johnny Cash – One

The Ronettes – Be My Baby

Jurassic 5 – Jayou

Ned’s Atomic Dustbin – Happy

The Mama’s & The Papa’s – Monday Monday

Tom Waits – Downtown Train

Funkadelic – (Not Just) Knee Deep

American Music Club – Johnny Mathis’ Feet

Pop Will Eat Itself – Get The Girl, Kill The Baddies

Alice Cooper – Big Apple Dreamin’

Snippet – Today I’m Gonna Be Happy

The Supremes – Baby Love

Electric Light Orchestra – 10538 Overture

Siouxsie & The Banshees – Peek-A-Boo

Planxty – The Good Ship Kangaroo

Dementio13 – Granadaland

The Faces – Stay With Me

The Crystals – Da Doo Ron Ron (When He Walked Me Home)

Underworld – Born Slippy (Nuxx)

The Wonder Stuff – Circlesquare

Andy Breckman – So Far So Good

Eric Matthews – Fanfare

Leon Rosselson – Harry’s Gone Fishing

Slade – Everyday

Squeeze – Tempted

Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds – The Ship Song

Stereolab – Cybele’s Reverie

Royce Da 5’9” – Power

Serge Gainsbourg – Intials B.B.

Fatima Mansions – The Door To Door Inspector

Roy Bailey – Rolling Home

Terry Hall – No No No

Suede – Metal Mickey

Thin Lizzy – The Boys Are Back In Town

Royskopp – Eple

The Cure – Boys Don’t Cry

Whodini – The Haunted House Of Rock

Billy Bragg – Tank Park Salute

The Temptations – My Girl

The La’s  - There She Goes

Roy Orbison – Only The Lonely

The Beach Boys – God Only Knows

June Tabor & The Oyster Band – Love Will Tear Us Apart

Queen – Killer Queen

Mary Wells – My Guy

The Rutles – Another Day

The Vaselines – Jesus Wants Me For A Sunbeam

Lindisfarne – Meet Me On The Corner

Jeff Buckley – Hallelujah (Live, Olympia, Paris, 1995)

David Bowie – Starman

Daft Punk – Around The World

Marvin Gaye – I Heard It Through The Grapevine

The Avalanches – Frontier Psychiatrist

Bob Marley & The Wailers – Waiting In Vain

Buffalo Tom – Late At Night

Eric Bogle & John Munro – Bloody Rotten Audience

Oasis – Sad Song

Flight Of The Conchords – Carol Brown

Kurtis Blow – 8 Million Stories

Kate Rusby – The Radio Sweethearts

Fatboy Slim – Rockafeller Skank

The Zombies – This Will Be Our Year

The Bluetones – Bluetonic

Robyn Hitchcock & The Egyptians – My Wife & My Dead Wife

Ray Charles – Hit The Road, Jack

Picturebox – I Got The Pox

A Tribe Called Quest – Scenario

Led Zeppelin – Gallows Pole

Weird Al Yankovic – You Don’t Love Me Anymore

Badly Drawn Boy – Promises

The Prodigy – Voodoo People

Massive Attack – Teardrop

Tindersticks – Marbles

Chas & Dave – Ain’t No Pleasing You

The Fall – I Am Damo Suzuki

The Kinks – Waterloo Sunset

XTC – Senses Working Overtime

Steeleye Span – Dark Eyed Sailor

New York Dolls – Trash

Arctic Monkeys – Mardy Bum

Run The Jewels – Close Your Eyes (And Count To Fuck)

Sharon Shannon – The Diamond Mountain

The Beatles – Strawberry Fields Forever

The Stranglers – Duchess

The Eagles – Journey Of The Sorcerer

Fairport Convention – Meet On The Ledge

[edengarden]

Hiii!!! I'm here for that regular bnha matchup👉🏿👈🏿 I really love the hq one u did omg!! It's *chef's kiss* kekdjdjdkdhd!!!! Here's the info:

Appearance: I'm fem, black, 5'1, slightly athletic & curvy-ish figure (lol), short? (mid-neck) hair, straight, dark brown eyes, size 9 shoe size (I still dk if it's relevant but oh well lmao)

Personality stuff: infp-t, Hufflepuff, Taurus sun, scorpio moon, sanguine, chaotic good, ambivert, a BuzzFeed quiz told me I'm a Pinto bean and a pumpkin spice mocha (do what you will with that info jdskdj)

Positive traits/qualities:

I'm super enthusiastic!! I love hyping people up and being energetic in general! I'm always down to try new things and have fun! If anyone is not feeling appreciated I'm ready to make sure they know that they're a queen/king and they're amazing!!!

I'm optimistic! I like to look at the brighter side of things and I always try my best to find a silver lining in any situation! Positive thinking helps me get through tough spots in my life because there's always hope for something better in the future!!

I'm observant!! I usually like to sit quietly and observe my surroundings. Especially in a new environment. Irl I like to read people's body language to asses their mood so ik how to approach them lol. I also do little things like remembering what they (friends/family) like to order at restaurants or something they pointed out at random that they liked. (Idk if I'm making sense lol)

Negative traits/flaws:

I'm annoying. Sometimes I just like being a little shit and cause mischief (being the youngest child does that to a person) but I think sometimes I'm too enthusiastic/energetic that it can be seen as obnoxious/annoying so I usually try and tone it down so I don't bother people...

I'm argumentative. When I have something to say I have to speak up. I try not to step on any toes but I can't help but argue with someone when our views on something clash. I like hearing different sides of debates though so I always give others a chance to talk. I don't go picking fights but if I feel like my opinion is being disregarded/not heard I will argue until it's known!!

I'm forgetful. Sure I'll remember random stuff like 'what my friend said in that one coffee shop last year' but important things like appointments? Birthdays? Assignment due dates? Idk her 😭 I try my best to write anything important down cause my memory is a selective sieve and it'll keep the most useless/random shit.

Hobbies: I love: Reading, writing, listening to music, learning languages, playing saxophone (I'm still learning tho lol), swimming, watching anime and cooking!

Music taste: any type of rock (punk rock, grunge, j-rock, metal), pop, kpop, RnB, jazz, dubstep, lofi hip hop, rap, bangers from: Elvis, the beach boys, Khalid, Ateez, Kendrick Lamar, p!atd, mcr, fallout boy, Nirvana, BTS, mxmtoon, Marianas trench, twenty one pilots, stray kids, Jay Park, crush, Dreamcatcher, Skrillex, MJ, troye sivan etc

Traits I look for: idk kind, funny/fun, loving/lovable, loyal (idk I ain't picky)

Traits I don't like: (nobody's perfect, just don't be a racist, xenophobic, sexist asshole lol)

More fun facts:

My love language is touch! I live for hand holding, cuddling, hugging, tickle fights and more!! 🥺

I love learning new stuff and rn I'm learning how to draw, paint, play music on sax, a new language and new recipes! :3

I love traveling!! It doesn't even have to be too far, as long as I don't know where I am it's an adventure! I usually end up getting lost whenever I travel (rip) but it's fun finding your way around and makes the trip more exciting!!

My current aesthetic: Sunflowers, striped turtle necks, warm blankets, rainbows that come out after storms, friendship bracelets, watching movies cuddled up w/someone, the joy of being alive. <3

It's mostly the same lol I just added a little something at the end :D Can't wait to see who I'll get! Don't forget to stay healthy & drink lots of water!! Take care 💙✨

I’m matching you up with Tokage! (You didn’t specify your gender preferences I hope this is alright ;-;)

You guys. I can’t even decide where to begin. The ENERGY- oh my god, you’re so enthusiastic, she’s so enthusiastic?? And you also recharge each other’s batteries so it’s a never ending stream of optimism and cheers!! People can’t believe the two of you are together but then again they watch you two go and they wonder how you two COULDN’T be a couple.

And her?? Thinking YOURE annoying? Fucking never. She’s the same as you to an extent and we KNOW she wouldn’t doubt your affection for her, but for the love of god if it does bother you, talk to her. She’ll have you thinking differently in NO TIME. this girl uses her words and she uses them well. And the two of you ARGUE. but it’s mostly fun arguing, Tokage isn’t the type to be so cocky as to not admit when she’s wrong; she’ll fight for her point if she knows it’s valid. Otherwise, if YOUR point becomes the only valid one, she’s giving it to you. She wouldn’t want to lose you over some stupid pride thing.

Oh my god, she’s 100% the type of person who’ll go “hey remember like two years ago when...” and theN MENTION SOMETHING STUPID OR EMBARRASSING YOU DID THAT YOU COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT

Tokage loves physical affection, both giving and receiving. She’s just so proud to call you hers?? Let her hold your hand and watch her always call dibs on you during training (Vlad never lets the class choose their partners anymore because of you two lol). She’ll tone down the PDA if you’re uncomfortable or if others warn her that they don’t like it, but otherwise?? She’s always by your side unless you need some space.

My god the two of you just have SUCH a fun relationship!! It’s never dull or boring, trust me.

Songs!!!

- my boy, Billie Eilish

- Feel It Still, Portugal. The Man

- butterfly addiction, Cö shu Nie

- Let’s Spend the Night Together, David Bowie

[skottydawgblog]

Top 25 Albums of All Time

Scott Welsch

Criteria:

Every song on the album must be attractive for listening. No “skippers” on the album. No, “Eh, that song kinda sucks” on the album. *Greatest Hits albums ARE NOT acceptable for this list. (This rule devastates me, as it disqualifies Foo Fighters)

2. The album/music/lyrics should still be relevant (and listenable) today.

3. The artist can’t just be for a specific crowd or followers (e.g. Jimmy Buffet, Grateful Dead, Moody Blues, etc.).

4. There is no need for the album to have won any awards or previous recognition.

5. I could have easily made this a “Top 100”, but I have a life.

TOP TWENTY FIVE ALBUMS OF ALL TIME:

#25 Billy Joel — Glass Houses

I played this album at bedtime growing up. I listened to side one, flipped the album, then listened to side two until the needle lulled me to sleep by making the “click click” noise at the end of the record. The album features Billy Joel’s first song to reach #1 status on Billboard (Still Rock and Roll To Me).

#24 Guns n Roses — Appetite For Destruction

My best friend in the 80s said to me, “Have you heard of this new band?” and handed me a cassette tape (in 1987). I listened to the entire cassette from start to finish the first time, and thought to myself, “Oh, man. These guys are gonna be huge.” Sure enough, Guns n Roses became one of the best-known names in modern rock. Their debut album (Appetite) has a buffet of glorious songs to listen to. Repeatedly.

#23 Elton John — Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

Elton John released this album as a two-disc set because he ended up writing and recording more songs than required by his recording company for the release. His creativity had kicked in full force (and then some). He recorded it in Jamaica (the country, not the neighborhood in Queens, NY).

#22 Red Hot Chili Peppers — Blood Sugar Sex Magik

The Chili Peppers’ fifth studio album, BSSM pushed them into mainstream. Prior to this album, the closest they had gotten was with a Stevie Wonder cover of Higher Ground on the Mother’s Milk album. No one has ever duplicated the variety of melodic undertones created by the combination of acid-rock, soul-funk, early alt-rock, and blues style on BSSM.

#21 Billy Idol — Billy Idol

Billy Idol’s debut album, released in 1982, was an absolute success after his breakup with the band Generation X. The song Dancing With Myself (track 11 on the 1983 reissue of the album) was actually a song originally recorded BY Generation X (with Billy Idol on lead vocals). It was a retail failure when released with Generation X, but when Billy Idol re-recorded and re-released it as a solo artist, it went mainstream.

#20 The Police — Zenyatta Mondotta

This was the last album The Police recorded by combining their reggae and punk music style before they switched to a more “popular” music style. Songs like Canary In A Coal Mine and Bombs Away had innuendos of political undertones, while Don’t Stand So Close To Me and De Do Do Do De Da Da Da were more lackadaisical and humorous.

#19 Van Halen — Van Halen

This album is an anomaly. Van Halen is a very well known band. They produced twelve albums. Yet, this is their debut album and has their legacy songs. The album has reached Diamond status by selling over ten million copies. It has one of the best-known guitar instrumental songs in history (eruption).

#18 Nirvana — Nevermind

This is my nod to the Foo Fighters, since they are not eligible for the list. Nevermind was the cork that popped and brought alternative rock (as a whole) into the mainstream. It basically created a whole new genre of both musicians and fans.

#17 Lynyrd Skynyrd — (Pronounced Lĕh-’nérd ‘Skin-’nérd)

Well…Free Bird, of course. I don’t need to write any about this album more than that.

#16 Pink Floyd — The Wall

I used to just listen to this album and watch the movie because it was the cool thing to do. Then, once I picked apart the meaning behind both (the music and the screenplay), it was totally eye opening. Pink Floyd was successful at concept before concept was cool.

#15 The Doors — The Doors

The Doors recorded this album in less than a month, yet it will inspire musicians for centuries. Critics often rate it the best album of all time.

#14 Rainmakers — Rainmakers

The Rainmakers self-titled album epitomizes my “100%” criterion. Every well written song tells a story, either historically or humorously. Also, The Rainmakers made rockabilly cool when no one knew what rockabilly was.

#13 Rush — Moving Pictures

With so many amazing Rush albums to choose from, it was difficult to pick just one. However, the rules of my list narrowed it down to Moving Pictures. I have spent countless nights in my life listening to this album from start to finish. Although Side B has no songs that ever received radio play, they are still AMAZING songs.

#12 Linkin Park — Hybrid Theory

This debut album launched Linkin Park into their river of greatness. Linkin Park was initially rejected by 42 recording agents before recording Hybrid Theory and becoming one of the all-time greatest alt rock bands.

#11 Beastie Boys — Licensed To Ill

Licensed To Ill is one of the fastest selling debut albums in history. It gained Diamond status (over 10 million copies). Some claim that Licensed To Ill is the best punk rap album ever released.

#10 Van Halen–5150

5150 was Van Halen’s debut album with Sammy Hagar as lead singer. Each song has crisp, clear instrumentals and incredibly well written music. Although the album received negative reviews from critics, each song creates different feelings and scenarios with the tempos and feelings. I know, I know. Van Halen is already on this list. However, as stated: this album is with Sammy Hagar as lead singer. The previous one was David Lee Roth.

#9 Violent Femmes — Violent Femmes

This was Violent Femmes debut album. It was the party album of the eighties. Every partygoer knew every lyric to every song. The Femmes had one of the most distinctive sounds of the times and remains an enduring classic. The minimalism and simplicity of their music created the attractiveness, and their lyrics are a drug.

#8 New Order — Substance

This is a compilation (2 disc) album. NOT a greatest hits album. It contains a ton of great New Order music. The only reason I made the exception (of “Greatest Hits”) is because it has a “B” sides disc included with many unreleased, 12-inch, and dub versions of the original songs. For New Order fans, this is a gold mine.

#7 The Who — Who’s Next

There are so many great tracks on here. The primary reason this one made the list is Baba O’Riley. This song (often mislabeled as Teenage Wasteland) was originally 30 minutes long. I would have had no problem with the song being that long.

#6 Prince — Purple Rain

Purple Rain had innovation that was unheard of in the early ’80s. For example, When Doves Cry does not have a bass line. The consolidation of R&B with rock was a new concept. Lastly, Prince’s guitar playing on this album was out of this world.

#5 U2 — Joshua Tree

Bono’s “great romance” and fascination with the United States served as the inspirations for The Joshua Tree. I wonder if Bono would have found today’s United States as inspirational? One of the BEST songs on this album- Running To Stand Still.

#4 AC/DC — Back In Black

This is one of the best-selling albums in history. It is AC/DC’s leanest, meanest album of all-time. It will always sound timeless and simple, yet savagely crafted.

#3 Led Zeppelin — IV

This album defined not only Led Zeppelin but the sound and style of 70s hard rock. It encompassed heavy metal, folk, pure rock-and-roll, and blues. This album not only served as a cornerstone but also a turning point for the future of music. Just don’t ask a guitar player to play Stairway (or Freebird).

#2 Nine Inch Nails — Downward Spiral

It’s no surprise that Trent Reznor collaborated with Jane’s Addiction drummer Stephen Perkins on this album. The instrumentation throughout the album is amazing. Every song leads into the next (it should, as it’s a concept album). Just don’t listen to the lyrics too closely. It could prove very, very depressing!

#1 Pearl Jam — Ten

Ten was the debut album from Pearl Jam in August 1991. Although most consider Pearl Jam a “Grunge” band, the album is more classic rock music. Most of the songs on the album began as simple instrumental band jam sessions that Eddie Vedder then wrote lyrics to go along with. The songs on Ten, despite their deep, dark lyrics, will remain on playlists for generations to come. Ten is powerful, insightful, deep, dark, thought provoking, and brilliant. “Why is the album named ‘Ten’?” you ask, when there are eleven tracks on it? Jeff Ament’s (the band’s bass player) love for NBA point guard Mookie Blaylock provided the inspiration. Blaylock’s involvement in a tragic car accident hit Pearl Jam like an injury to a family member. Blaylock’s jersey number was — you guessed it — Ten.

HONORABLE MENTION:

Steve Miller Band — Book of Dreams

This album has a few legendary songs on it: Jet Airliner, Swingtown, Jungle Love, and True Fine Love. The only reason it did not meet the cut is because it has some “eh” songs on it. However, a host can play this album straight through at a party or a get together, and no one will complain.

The Cars — The Cars

This is an amazing album. Clean, crisp guitar. Ric Ocasek’s vocals and lyrics are powerful. However, two songs (I’m In Touch With Your World and Dontcha Stop) prevent this album from meeting the “100%” criterion.

[melodramaticfanatic-blog]

Prove me wrong

Bucky x reader

Warnings: smut, cocky Bucky, definitely 18+

A/N: Smutty one shot thing (this was supposed to be a short drabble, HA!). For the record, I know plenty of women can’t find pleasure through only penetration and there is nothing wrong with that at all; do what you need to do for you, ladies! Just needed something for cocky ass Bucky to challenge her on and that popped in my head.

Gif not mine, credit to owner

“What I’m saying is, you men have it so easy in terms of sex,” you slurred slightly, gesturing wildly at the group of Avengers seated around the room. “We women really get the short end of the stick.”

“Sometimes literally!” Nat called out with a devious grin. 

“Care to run that by me again, sweetheart?” Bucky asked from across the sofa, his own voice not unaffected by the copious amounts of alcohol the whole team had enjoyed tonight. 

“You, all of you,” you said as you turned to face him, your arm grabbing the back of the couch for support while your body leaned unintentionally in towards him, “you just get up, get off and go. You have no idea what it’s like for us!”

“I’m thinking this is one of those times when we just smile and nod, Buck,” Steve suggested wryly from his seat near the pool table. 

“Don’t patronize me, flag boy!” you snapped.

Steve chuckled and held up his hands. “On that note, I think I’ll call this a night. Be good, Y/N, I know that you love me really. Bucky, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do and don’t do anything that Tony would do.”

You watched as the super soldier made his way out of the room with only the slightest falter to his step. Obviously, Steve had not had nearly as much to drink as you had. Why were you yelling about sex again?

“So tell me, Doll,” Bucky said, reclaiming your attention. “Why is it so hard for women?”

“Look, men are basically guaranteed an orgasm, right? You shove your cock somewhere nice and soft, thrust a couple of times and wham, bam, thank you ma’am, you’re all blissed out. I, like many women, do not reach orgasm through just penetration. That means that while you have achieved nirvana and are ready for a nap, I have to find a way to stimulate other areas in order to join you in happy town.”

Seriously, why were you talking about this with Bucky? Bucky, the cute, blue-grey eyed, quiet, man of mystery that you had been crushing on since he moved into Avengers Tower several months ago. Sure, you were friends with the guy but you had never talked about anything like this before. No doubt it had to do with your recent breakup and the incredible sexual frustration you had been building throughout that entire relationship. Those ingredients plus hormones and alcohol had mixed in your bloodstream to form a poison cocktail: it had killed all your filters and left you a rambling mess. 

“Are you saying that you can’t achieve orgasm through penetrative sex or that you haven’t yet?” Bucky asked, cocking his head to the side slightly as he studied you. 

“Same thing.”

“Not the same thing at all, sweetheart. Haven’t just means a man hasn’t done his job correctly yet.”

You stared back at Bucky, blinking stupidly. Was your brain so foggy because of the beer or because of the way that he was looking at you?

“See, I’m thinking we may need to do a little experiment, sweetheart,” Bucky suggested, his voice dipping lower as he moved down the sofa to be closer to you. His metal arm came up to brush against your arm on the back of the couch, the smooth cold of his touch instantly raising goosebumps along your skin, and you turned your head to look at it, perplexed by this new development. 

“What do you mean?”

“I could get you off through only penetration.” His tone was matter of fact, not a hint of bragging to it, as though he was just stating the obvious. 

“Bullshit,” you challenged without thinking. 

A large smirk broke out across his face. “That’s what I thought you’d say. So let’s test that theory.”

The wheels of your mind were turning incredibly slowly. “As far as I can see...there’s only one way to do that.”

“Yup,” he agreed with another cocky smirk. “I can only think of one way too.”

“Why don’t you tell me what your thought process was and then I’ll see if it matches my thought process,” you said slowly, not wanting to embarrass yourself if you had somehow misread the situation. 

“Well, first, we need to wait until you’re sobered up. You have to be sober so that you can give consent to test the theory, obviously. Plus, I wouldn’t want alcohol to interfere with any results. So I figure, we let you get a good night’s sleep and then tomorrow, I come and fuck you so good, you realize just how wrong you were.” Bucky finished speaking and gave you a charming smile, the kind of smile that would sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman wearing white gloves in 100 degree heat. 

You blinked at him stupidly in response. Even without the alcohol turning your brain to mush, you would not have been able to think straight. Not with Bucky’s voice, so low and tempting, speaking to you like this as his eyes seared into your own, burning more brightly than any star in the sky. 

“What do you think about that, doll? Sound like a plan?”

“Umm...yes?”

“Good,” Bucky said with a triumphant smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow then. Oh, and, don’t be alarmed when I stand up...talking about this with you has had an affect on me.”

You continued to blink at him stupidly, all ability to speak having left you. The sight of Bucky’s pants pulled taut over a straining erection when he stood to leave the room did nothing to help you recover your powers of speech and you sat on the couch for a long time after he had left the room, wondering what had just happened and more importantly, what was going to happen tomorrow.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

The knock on your door came as you were towel drying your hair after your shower. It wasn’t early morning, there was no way that you were going to be getting up early after last night’s escapades, but you had only abandoned your bed about 30 minutes ago. As you looked over at the door in response, a shiver ran along your back. You hadn’t been able to get a good night’s sleep because of the way your mind kept returning to Bucky and his promises. Were you scared or excited? It seemed like a mixture of both. Now you felt frozen at just the idea that the man of your fantasies from the last several months could be waiting for you, just outside the door. Would he remember the conversation from last night? Would he still want to prove you wrong?

“You in there, Doll?” Bucky’s voice called from the hallway. “I got coffee.”

Walking over to the door you took a deep breath to steady yourself and tried to stop your hands from shaking. Coffee wasn’t anything new; Bucky often brought you coffee to start the mornings before training. He was especially good about it if you had had a late night the night before. 

“Morning Buck,” you said pleasantly, opening the door and moving out of the way so that he could come in. 

The man was a vision of perfection: long, dark strands of hair framing his face where they had come loose from the bun at the back of his head, bright blue-grey eyes with just a hint of a crinkle around the edges, perfect, plump lips already curved into a smirk and just a hint of dark stubble along a jawline so sharp it would probably cut glass better than any diamond in the world. To complete the sublime view, Bucky carried a tray with coffee and brunch for both of you.

“Hey, Doll. I wasn’t sure if you’d be hungry so I brought some stuff just in case.”

“You know me,” you tried to play it cool as you closed the door and turned to find him sitting on your bed. “I’m always ravenous.”

“Sure, just didn’t know if it was gonna be food you were in the mood for.” Bucky’s smirk grew larger and his eyes darkened slightly. Oh, shit. He definitely remembered.

“Uh, I, uh-”

The man on your bed gave a low chuckle and held out a cup for you. “Relax, sweetheart. I know you were a little drunk last night. No hard feelings if you don’t want to test that theory of yours anymore.”

“It’s not really a theory. I mean, a theory is just a belief, an assumption. This is a fact, Buck. I’ve never had an orgasm just by having sex.” Your face heated as you spoke and you had to look down and drink a big gulp of your coffee. Bucky’s eyes had never strayed from you. Why hadn’t you just laughed it off and let the whole thing go?

“You’ve never had sex with me, sweetheart.”

It rankled you that he kept challenging you and his refusal to believe you was just enough to egg you into continuing the conversation.

“Not yet, anyway...” he added with another smirk. 

“Alright,” you lifted your chin defiantly, your gaze meeting his. “so prove me wrong then. Penetration only. That means no hands wandering down to rub my clit or vibrating cock rings, you know.”

Another dark chuckle rumbled from his chest as he shifted slightly on the bed, his pupils now dominating his once bright eyes. “I don’t need gadgets to do my job for me, Y/N.”

“Get over here and do it then,” you challenged.

Bucky moved the tray off of your bed, setting it on the nearby dresser before coming towards you. You could feel your blood racing under the skin along every inch of your body; it suddenly felt as though all your life the world had been colored in sepia and Bucky had just turned on the technicolor. Everything was brighter, more vivid and more real. Just watching as the handsome man moved towards you like quicksilver was enough to make your chest heave with irregular breaths. The closer he came to you, the more alive you felt. He stopped walking with about a foot left between your chests and placed a hand on either side of your waist; one warm and soft the other cool and smooth, they easily found the edge of your shirt and slipped just underneath, brushing against your already over heated skin.

“You sure, doll?” Bucky dipped his head slightly so that he was on an eye level with you.

You nodded dumbly, staring deeply into his lust blown eyes.

“I need to hear you say it, Y/N.” Bucky brought his flesh hand up to run his thumb along your jaw bone. “Tell me that you want me, doll.”

“I want you.”

It came out as a ragged whisper but the words had hardly left your lips before Bucky’s mouth crashed against yours, hot and needy. The space between your bodies was gone, he was pressed as close to you as he could possibly be without actually being inside of you, the hand on your jaw angling your face towards his. His head tilted slowly, finding the perfect position to devour your lips from while his metal hand gripped onto your hip and held you steady. Your blood thundered in your ears as your own hands reached out to him, one wrapping a fist into the soft material of his t-shirt, the other reaching back to tangle into his hair. So much for keeping it tied back in a bun. As you tugged against his silky locks gently, Bucky let out a low moan, the vibrations causing your lips to tingle. 

“Damn, doll,” he gasped, breaking away to catch his breath. “A guy could get used to being kissed like that.”

Without giving you a chance to reply, Bucky leaned in to kiss you again, this time more slowly. He caught your bottom lip between his teeth and pulled gently causing you to whimper. You could feel him smirking against your lips as he pressed light pecks over them, trailing down to reach your jawline. 

“I think it’s about time to get you out of these clothes, Y/N,” he murmured against your skin in between smoothing kisses along your neck. 

It’s hard to say which of you was more surprised by what happened next. Bucky had been thoroughly in control of this encounter from the moment he walked in the room but without any warning, your body took over, acting purely on impulse and driven by desire. The hand that had been wrapped in his hair jerked down to his t-shirt and with a sharp pull you found that each of your fists clenched around a long, jagged piece of fabric. Bucky looked down at his ruined shirt and bare chest in shock but before he could say a word, you were on him again, your mouth claiming his as you pushed him back towards the bed. His knees hit the mattress and you both toppled on to it, your body coming to rest on top of his as his arms wrapped around you, hands splaying against your back and pulling you closer.

It was obvious from his response that Bucky didn’t mind you taking control. You could feel his bulge beneath you, rubbing against your clothed core, as he hummed happily against your mouth and rolled his hips tauntingly. His tongue darted out to gently caress your lips and you opened yourself to him, reveling at the way he licked over them before delving deeply into you, kissing you as no one ever had before. His hands found the hem of your shirt again and slid the material up, flesh and metal both raising goosebumps along your back as they pulled the garment away. You sat up, straddling him, and finished the job of removing your top, watching as his hungry eyes traveled over every inch of newly revealed flesh. He stared at you the way a man dying of thirst stares at a glass of water. His metal hand sat on your hip, his thumb making small circles on the flesh above your waistline, while his flesh hand got busy exploring. He pressed his palm to your stomach and agonizingly slowly slid it upwards, traveling along the valley between your breasts before smoothing his fingers along your collar bone. Desperate for his hands to be on you, you reached back and unclasped your bra, letting the material fall to the ground with a soft thump. 

For a long moment, Bucky simply laid beneath you and basked in your beauty. He had been dreaming about this for far too long to not enjoy the moment. In what felt like the most profound understatement, Bucky purred out, “Well, aren’t you just the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen, Doll?” before dragging his hand down to capture your breast. Your head fell back as Bucky went to work, his hand groping and kneading one side as he sat up to press kisses on the other. A harsh gasp was sucked between your teeth as he bit your tender flesh, marking you slightly before sucking and kissing the angry skin soothingly. 

“Bucky, please,” you whined. Your nipples were hard peaks and he seemed to be pointedly ignoring them, both his hand and his mouth circling around them but never making contact.

“Mhmm?”

“Teasing me wasn’t part of the deal,” you panted, one of your hands wrapping into his hair again.

In the blink of an eye, the former soldier had flipped you onto your back in the bed, his body fit snugly between your legs as he hovered over you. Looking up at you from under his dark lashes, Bucky smirked and then lowered his head, capturing one nipple and sucking harshly on it while flicking the other with his thumb nail. Your body was writhing beneath him, unclear words and curses falling in a nonstop string from your lips. You had never considered yourself particularly sexual and didn’t think that your breasts were very sensitive, but under Bucky’s care you could already feel pleasure coiling tightly in the pit of your stomach. 

Moving slowly, Bucky drifted his lips across your chest, pressing soft kisses over your skin until his mouth reached the opposite nipple. His free hand began to snake down your body, expertly finding the closure on your pants and undoing them as he rasped his teeth over the hard bud. He didn’t bother to remove your clothing yet, choosing instead to simply slip his flesh hand inside the fabric, his warm fingers rubbing almost tenderly over you. You half expected him to plunge his fingers into you immediately but Bucky took you by surprise, his hand moving slowly, brushing and rubbing against your slit. 

“You’re still teasing me, James,” you groaned through gritted teeth. 

Bucky responded to hearing you say his name with a low growl. He instantly moved down your body, pushing your pants and underwear away before coming to rest between your thighs. His shoulders were so broad that you had to open your legs as widely as possible, your wet core on full display before his eager eyes. 

“Fuck, Doll,” he murmured in a voice so animalistic you had to fight down a shiver, “you’re even more perfect than I imagined you’d be.”

He began to press soft kisses to the inside of your thigh, one of his arms wrapping around your leg where it connected to your body and coming to rest with his hand just above your sex. The other hand reached out until it found one of yours, intertwining your fingers with his own in a gesture so loving you could swear that you felt your heart thump against your ribcage in a wild attempt to reach the man between your thighs. Your hips lifted off the bed, searching for contact and eliciting a low chuckle from Bucky. He knew what you wanted. Moving slowly, the former soldier traced his mouth along the soft skin of your thigh, his stubble tickling against you until his face was positioned at the apex of your legs. You looked down to see his bright eyes shining up at you as he lowered his head and flattened his tongue against you, stroking a long, rough lick from your entrance up to flick against your clit. 

“Bucky!” you cried on a wild moan.

He repeated the action, pressing a kiss against your bundle of nerves when he reached it this time. You could feel yourself getting closer to the edge. 

“This doesn’t- this doesn’t count,” you panted. “You said- ugh...you said penetration only.”

Bucky sucked your bud between his lips briefly before releasing you with a smirk. “I can’t just shove myself into you, Y/N. Christ, what kind of losers have you been fucking?” He chuckled darkly and lapped his tongue against your folds again. “I have to get you ready to take my cock first. Get you nice and wet so that you can stretch enough to fit me. Consider this a control study; we know you can have an orgasm and now I’m gonna give you one to demonstrate that.”

True to his word, Bucky went to work. His tongue pressed between your folds, dipping deeply into you as his fingers began to circle against your clit in a demanding rhythm. Your hips rose to meet him as your free hand tangled in his hair, holding his face to your body. He kissed and licked and sucked at you as though he would never be able to get enough. His mouth took the place of his fingers, covering your aching clit while his hand moved to hold you down. As you tugged against his hair, he let out a feral groan that vibrated against you and pushed you over the edge. With a moan of his name and several unintelligible words, you felt the tight coil inside you snap, your walls spasming and legs trembling with the shocks of pleasure coursing through your body. 

“That’s it, Doll,” Bucky whispered tenderly, still pressing kisses to your heated flesh as you began to go limp while coming down from your high. “Damn, Y/N, you are so fucking amazing.”

Unable to think of anything else to say, you simply panted, “you still haven’t proved me wrong, James.”

He let out a dark chuckle and moved off the bed, shedding his remaining clothing and grabbing a condom from the brunch tray he had brought along. Your head fell to the side as you kept your eyes fixated on him, your entire body feeling like mush after your recent release. Every piece of him was coiled muscle so it shouldn’t have surprised you that he was packing major length and girth below the belt. His skin shone slightly with a light sheen of sweat and your eyes traced every line of his abdomen before returning to the thick cock that was standing proudly as he rolled the latex over it. Bucky caught you staring and smirked again, knowing what was to come. He crawled up the bed, his eyes never leaving yours and began kissing you again, slowly, as his weight pressed you back to the bed. You could feel the tip of him brushing against you with each shift of his hips and it was driving you crazy with desire.

“Damn it, do you ever stop teasing?!” you huffed angrily as he moved his hips away from you again. 

“Alright, Y/N,” he said with another light kiss to your lips. “No more teasing.”

He reached down to align himself with your opening, unable to resist rubbing his cock along your wet slit once more as he did so. You hissed sharply as he began to push into your tight core. 

“You ok, Doll?” Bucky asked through gritted teeth, holding himself still with just his engorged head inside your lips.

To be honest, Bucky was almost too big. Even having this small piece of him inside you was causing a burning pain as your body tried to adjust to the intrusion, but that was why he had taken his time with his mouth earlier. You were still so wet and stimulated that after several moments the pain shifted to a kind of deep pleasure. 

“More,” you begged, your nails biting into the soft flesh of his back as you tried to pull him closer. 

Happy to oblige, Bucky slid a bit deeper into you, kissing you softly and watching your face for any sign of distress. Your head tipped back at all the new sensations you were feeling. You had never really understood why sex toys were made with veins and ridges until this exact moment. As Bucky sheathed himself fully within you, shivers ran along your skin in response to the rub and throb of the protruding veins along his thick shaft. He held himself in you, feeling how tightly you were wrapped around him and sucked soft kisses into the flesh of your neck, waiting for you to be ready. You had never felt so filled, so stretched, and although it hurt slightly, the pain was covered by the pleasure of the wet suction of Bucky’s lips on your skin, the feel of his cold metal arm at your waist, the brush of his warm fingertips against your cheek.

“I need you, Bucky,” you mewled softly, feeling his body tense in response to your words. 

Moving slowly, Bucky began to draw himself out of you again, the feeling of each vein and ridge rubbing against your soft walls setting your nerves on fire. He pulled almost all the way out before plunging back into you with a low groan. 

“Damn, Doll, you’re so tight and soft...you feel so amazing.” Each compliment he showered on you was accompanied by a thrust and roll of his hips. “I just want to worship your body for the rest of my life.”

“Bucky, I-I,” you were panting heavily, taken aback at the way your muscles were tensing and the pressure that was coiling deep within you. “Shit, it’s never been like this!”

With lithe ease, Bucky rolled you over so that you were on top, still buried deeply between your legs. He began thrusting his hips up manically as you moved to straddle him and you let out a near scream of pleasure. The new angle allowed his large head to hit repeatedly against a spot inside you no one had ever found before.

“I know, Doll. It’s never been like this because it’s never been with me. You were wasting your time with those fucking losers who don’t have any idea how to treat you.” Bucky was panting and ramming himself into you, his hands on your hips to allow him to sink as deeply as possible. You were nearly insensate with lust, your fingers clawing at his chest as he continued to pound into you. “You were made for me, Y/N. No one else compares to you. I love being inside you; I’ve been waiting for this since the day we met.”

“Bucky, Bucky, please, I’m gonna-” you whimpered, biting your lip and tipping your head back. 

“Cum for me, Doll. Please, cum for me. You look so beautiful when you orgasm.”

With a snap and a roll of his hips, Bucky sent you over the edge, your body shaking wildly as your walls clenched around him and all your muscles contracted. A few tears leaked from your eyes as you gasped and moaned his name over and over again. The feeling of you tightening around him and the gorgeous look of bliss that came over you was almost enough to make Bucky cum right on the spot but the former soldier held on, riding you through your pleasure before suddenly rolling your bodies again to place himself on top. Staring deeply into your surprised eyes, Bucky reached down and grabbed one of your legs, hitching it up so that it rested against his shoulder. 

“You’ve got one more in you, don’t you, sweetheart?” he asked sweetly, leaning down to brush his lips against yours as he resumed thrusting into you. Your body answered the question for you, tension beginning to build again. Now that Bucky had proven his point, he felt free to explore your entire body and his hand reached down to where you were connected, stroking and rubbing insistently against your clit in rhythm with his hips. 

“Oh, god...JAMES!” You knew at the volume you had just called his name there would not be a single person in the tower who was unaware of what was happening. You also didn’t care. 

“Doll...Y/N!” Bucky had become a panting mess, his hair sticking to his sweaty face as he slammed his hips against you like a man possessed. Watching you come undone for the third time under him was too much and he came with a groan of your name which he muffled against your lips. 

It took a long moment before either of you could move, your bodies too overwhelmed by pleasure. Eventually, Bucky drew your leg back to your side and slid himself languidly out of you, chuckling when you whimpered at the sudden emptiness. He moved his weight off of you, pressing his body to your side and wrapping an arm around your waist. 

“How’d I do at proving you wrong, Doll?” he teased lightly. 

“Well, technically, you did but it was only 1 out of 3. Not a great ratio,” you quipped back. 

He chuckled darkly and pressed his lips to your temple. “I’ll keep that in mind for next time, Y/N.”

“Next time?”

“Hell yes, Doll. I told you, you were made for me. You’re the only one I want. I’ve spent months waiting for you; I’m not letting you go now that I have you. And I think I just did a pretty great job of proving I was made for you too, Y/N.” He lifted a hand to your chin, turning your face so that he could look into your eyes which were suddenly feeling a little misty. “Oh, and by the way, it just so happens that I love you.”

[liugeaux]

Greatest Songs Ever - Part 11 (Self Actualization)

self-actualization [self-ak-choo-uh-luh-zey-shuh]

the achievement of one's full potential through creativity, independence, spontaneity, and a grasp of the real world.

It's been 3 years since I’ve done a “Greatest Songs Ever” list.  At that time I was trying to dip into retro music and find songs I connected with that were released before I was even born. That whole process was stressful, migraine-inducing and worst of all, it felt forced. For the next set of songs, I’ve chosen the theme of “Self Actualization”.  

I am not able to properly formulate an opinion about music I wasn’t there for, I know this now. Instead, I’ll continue to pull songs I am intimately familiar with to create a quality product on this blog. That’s not me shitting on older generations of music, it's just me finally achieving my full potential when it comes to building a playlist. Let’s get started.  

2006 “Tears Don’t Fall”  - Bullet For My Valentine

If I were to list the genres of music I love, Metal would be number like 4 or 5.  However, every once in a while a song peers it’s head out of the wreckage and catches my ear. From the first guitar chords “Tears Don’t Fall” grabbed me. I’m gonna call it a ballad because it feels like a song that should make me sad. Most screamy emo songs don’t carry the emotional weight they are designed to, but BFMV hits a nerve with “Tears Don’t Fall” that most bands aren’t even able to dream of.  Hell, BFMV has yet to release a song that even scratches the surface of “Tears Don’t Falls’” guttural impact.

2006 “The Sharpest Lives” - My Chemical Romance

I know, I know, this nearly forgotten MCR track wasn’t even a stand out when the seminal The Black Parade album was released, but somehow it has stood the test of time in my library. No MCR song more perfectly encapsulates both the aggression and awkwardness of the band’s entire catalog. “If it looks like I’m laughing, I’m really just asking to leave” is just one of the dozen perfect MCR lyrics on this track. I love “Welcome to The Black Parade”, “This Is How I Disappear”, “Mama”, “Teenagers” and the rest of the 100% classic Black Parade, but “The Sharpest Lives” hits harder both sonically and emotionally than most of the songs released in its decade.  

2006 “Stop This Train” - John Mayer

Ok, let’s slow it down a bit. This isn't this first time I’ve talked about John Mayer in this blog and not even the first time he’s made this list, but its a crime that “Stop This Train” has never been mentioned with the proper respect on it’s name. Written as a touching anthem about the existential nature of growing old, “Train” is the perfect John Mayer song. It combines his knack for simple and honest guitar parts with lightly metaphoric lyrics that cut directly into the segments of our psyche that make us human. The older I get the more this song makes me cry...and that can’t be unestimated.    

2004 “All Downhill From Here”  - New Found Glory

NFG has always been a stealthy favorite band of mine. “All Downhill From Here” is NFG at the height of their power. Once upon a time, I was ashamed to “like” any pop-punk outside of Green Day because of the perceived social implications. Jordan Pundik’s voice is just punky enough to turn most people off at first listen, but through the storm and the years, I’ve realized that NFG is kinda my spirit animal when it comes to pop-punk music. As for the song, it's endlessly singable and has a strong bridge, the two most important parts of any song I wish to immortalize on this dumb list.  

2003 “How About You”  - Staind

This is an admittedly weird one. As the forgotten 3rd single from Staind’s 4th album “How About You” is a song not many people know, however, when I dig into the archives it always floats to the top. Even with its vaguely religious lyrics and somewhat self-righteous delivery, “How About You” is sung with an earnestness not found in nu-metal. Sometimes when I listen to this song I wonder if Aaron Lewis realizes how unique it is to his chosen genre.  

2002 “Harder to Breathe” - Maroon 5

This one is a softball. Everyone knows "Harder to Breathe”, everyone loves "Harder to Breathe”. Its become a go-to karaoke knock-out. So much so that people ask me to sing it all the time. Equal parts pure song-writing talent, and light cultural appropriation, “Harder to Breathe” is funky for white-people-music and that’s really all it needs to succeed. All of Maroon 5′s tracks following that first album have a self-aware calculated feel to them, but “Harder To Breathe” is the best that first album has to offer and is a talented first stab at making a name out of something.  

2011 “Little Black Submarines” - The Black Keys

Most of The Black Keys tracks have an air of pretentiousness to them that’s hard to get past. I like tracks like “Lonely Boy” and “Howlin’ For You” but neither of them sound genuine. They sound like 2 dorky white dudes playing the part of ironic rock stars, which ultimately leads to them making songs for frat guys who are too cool to listen to typical frat guy music. “Little Balck Submarines” is a HUGE exception to your typical Black Keys song, and its the only time I’ve felt real emotion from the duo. 

2007 “Watch Over You” - Alter Bridge

I’ve always liked this song, but it wasn’t until I saw Alter Bridge at the fair a few years ago that I LOVED this song. Alter Bridge gets a lot of shit for being the offspring of Creed, but it's really unwarranted. They are one of the only bands still around carrying the torch for normal-ass rock music. Some may turn their nose up at it, but Alter Bridge has some bangers. “Watch Over You” is your stereotypical, pull out your lighters, ballad, that’s written vaguely enough for it to cover several different relationship dynamics. Its real strength comes from Myles Kennedy’s vocals. He might be the best singer in rock music today.  

1997 “My Own Summer (Shove It)” - Deftones 

In 1997 I was transitioning from being a hard-core Garth Brooks fan, into rock music in a big way. Bands like Nirvana, STP, Pearl Jam, Bush, and Live had a back catalog that I was swimming in the deep end of. The Deftones, and more specifically “My Own Summer” represented a “cooler” and more edgy version of this new found love of Rock music. Chino Mareno’s vocals during the chorus singing “Shove It!” might have been the most aggressive vocals I had ever heard to that point. I still get the occasional goosebump when jamming this track.  I can’t say I was ever cool enough to truly understand why the Deftones were great, but “My Own Summer” is a cornerstone of the musical taste of my formative years.  

2015  “Here to Mars” - Coheed and Cambria

13 years and 7 albums in, I was sure I had heard the best Coheed and Cambria had to offer. “Gravemakers & Gunslingers” was even included in this dumb series of blogs. I wasn’t a huge fan of The Aftermath and I assumed C&C were on their way out creatively. Then they released The Color Before the Sun and I was impressed. That album was their first outside of the silly sci-fi narrative they’ve been weaving for 15 years now. Track 4, “Here To Mars” is a surprisingly straight forward love song that has grown into one of my favorite songs of this decade. Seriously, it’s probably a top 5 from the teens for me. It’s as big as older Coheed songs, but still carries a touching sentiment that I just don’t get from the rest of their library. Of all the songs on this list, I recommend this one the most.  

Ok, that wasn’t so hard...maybe I’ll bang another one of these out soon. Who knows? 

[sims2snfkggh]

The Brookey family - chapter 4: Gemma Charm

Friday evening, 20 pm: perfect moment for a movienight and a sleepover with your best friend. 

Gemma: “This was the best idea we had in quite a long time. I hate this spring rain.”

Alistar: “Yeah.”

Alistar and Gemma put the foldaway up for tonight and turned on Spotify for a good session of girl talk with good music in te background.

Gemma: “What I do like, is Moss’s cover of Lana Del Ray’s ‘Video Games’. Damn! It’s way less depressing than the original. This is the first time I actually listened to the lyrics. And this song - it just suits you. Reminds me of you and Billy”

Alistar: “Yea, agreed. But I actually got this song via Wolfgang, so it kinda reminds me of him instead of... actually playing video games."

Gemma: “Wolfgang? I assumed he’s more the kind of guy to listen to heavy metal or Nirvana or something like that.”

Alistar punched Gemma’s shoulder softly and chuckled.

Alistar: “He’s actually quite sensitive. At least... In some ways. Wolfgang’s just full of surprises, you chould say."

Gemma: “Hey hey, weren’t you done with this boy?”

Alistar: “I am! I still absolutely understand zero of why he left that night, but hey, that doesn’t mean I don’t understand the most parts of him, you know.”

Gemma: “You are one of a kind. You’re too good for this world. - Come on, let’s go and watch Twilight!”

Alistar: “Damn, it’s too long ago we made popcorn. We should definitely do this more often.”

Gemma: “You know what’s the weirdest thing about these movies? Jacob! I mean, at first he’s in love with Bella and then he’s in love with her kid. Eww! But... I still hope they’ll make a perspective about Edward's perspective.”

Alistar stared laughing. “Stop it! We still have to watch the next movies!”

Alistar: “Besides, the whole movie is rubbish, haha. I mean: sparkling, immortal vampires?”

Gemma: “Okay. But come on, what if something like this did excist in real life. I mean... what would life look like, then?”

Alistar: "Well, I’d be sure as hell smart enough to not befriend a fucking vampire. Those cold ice queens.”

Gemma laughed out loud.

Alistar: “But if vampires did excist in real life and they had eternal life and stuff, I’m sure they wouldn’t go to high school like 100 times. Because that part totally sucks. I mean, who would voluntarily repeat high school anyway?”

Gemma laughed even harder.

Alistar: “I would totally repeat college instead. Moving out, just a little studying, enough time for gaming, writing stories and reading books. Sounds perfect to me! And I wouldn’t have to live with my dad any more, finally. I’m so happy high school’s just one more year untill it’s over. Can’t wait for my graduation! By the way, what study course would you pick if you could choose anything? Uni’s just one year away!” Alistar wiggled her eyebrows.

Gemma: “If I could pick anything I’d want? Something with music, or fine arts. But... since life’s not a Twilight movie and I really think such a choice will let my parents down. I’ll go to Foxbury Institute to study Psychology.”

Alistar: “Wow what? Wait a moment. You’re not going to Britechester? But... And how long have you been thining about this? And since when do you care about what your parents think?”

Gemma: “Well...”

Alistar: “Aw shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean your parents, but...”

Gemma: “It’s okay, it’s okay. Like you know, I don’t know anything about my father. But mum never got the chance to go to college, so she really wished that for us.”

Alistar: “At which university did Darrel go to college?”

Gemma: “Nah. He’s an office assistant. Even though mum wanted us to go to college, we didn’t. Darrel would never tell anyone why because he’s such a snob, but I know he’s been saving up money for me, so I could go to college. He’s a real smart kid after all, so no one ever noticed the fact he didn’t go to college."

I wonder if mum ever thought about what job I would do when I’m older. Shit. I miss mum at moments like these...

Gemma: “What about you, Ali?”

Alistar: “Hmm? - Yep! I mean, I don’t know which university I would pick, yet. I always thought Britechester was very charmfull. And I just don’t like Foxbury’s technical stuff - no offense, Gem. No...  I guess - I honestly don’t give a fuck which course it’s gonna be, as long as I can move out as soon as I finished high school. My dad’s never around anyway, so it’s not like he would care. Thought it would be fun if we were housemates, though. But... if you’d go to college to Foxbury, I don’t think that’s really...--”

Gemma’s eyes started to twinkle.

Gemma: “-- no! Of course it’s still possible to live together! We would live in Britechester and I’d just turn into a vampire, so I could run like the speed of light, and go to college every day. We’d listen to music, eat popcorn, watch movies and laugh together everyday, all day long!” .”

Alistar laughed really hard at that joke. “Yeah, would be really fun. If only fucking magic was involved. Too bad this is just real life. Fuck vampires any way. Let’s watch Harry Potter next time instead.”

Gemma: “Oh, I don’t just like you, I love you.”

Alistar: “Serious as hell though. Harry Potter’s better anyway, right?"

Gemma: “It fucking is.”

[blankasolun]

source: Metal Wani January 2018

Dave Grohl Remembers Meeting NIRVANA for 1st Time: How I Got Introduced to Grunge

Dave Grohl remembered meeting the boys from Nirvana before they went on to change the world of music together, explaining in a new Dear Seattle video (via Alternative Nation):

“I remember getting off the plane, and Krist and Kurt meeting me at baggage claim. It was like having Children of the Corn pick you up from the airport. When I came up to Seattle, Nirvana was doing a show with another drummer.

“I get there to this Nirvana show, there’s 1,200 people, and maybe 15 of them looked like they were punk rockers. The rest were trailer park kids with greasy long hair wearing clothes they bought at Frey Myers and Salvation Army.

“They were flannels… I still dress like the kids I saw at the gig that night.

“It already felt like there was some sort of movement, but it was unintentional. These people just gathered, or were drawn to this thing, because it just sounded like they felt.

“The energy was different than anything I’d ever seen. That was my first day in Seattle.

“I went out and got drunk with all the guys in Nirvana, it was really fun. I thought if I don’t become the drummer, at least I have a story to tell. I think that’s the first time I grilled octopus too, that was weird.”

Grohl added during the chat:

“Anyone who spent more than one season in Seattle knows that there’s practically one season in Seattle. Those hard five or six months when you don’t see sun, you retreat to places like basements or bars. In that, you develop these little communities.

“I talked to friends at home, they’d say, ‘What did you do last night.’ I’d say, ‘I went and shot pool with a guy from Alice in Chains, a dude from Pearl Jam, a guy from Soundgarden, and someone from Mudhoney. It’s a big city with little-town vibe, small-town vibe.’

“Months went by where I didn’t see the sun. Kurt and I wouldn’t go to sleep until 9 o’clock in the morning as the sun was coming up.

“We’d wake up at 4 in the afternoon as it was going down, in this tiny little apartment where I slept on a couch that is half as long as me, with turtles and this aquarium that Kurt had built.”

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Dave Grohl Remembers Meeting Nirvana for 1st Time: How I Got Introduced to Grunge source: Metal Wani January 2018 Dave Grohl Remembers Meeting NIRVANA for 1st Time: How I Got Introduced to Grunge…

[obtusemedia]

In Ascending Order: Top 50 Songs of the ‘90s

The ‘90s have become sort of an idyllic period that many Millennials and Gen Xers look fondly upon. It makes sense — the economy was good, Seinfeld ruled televisions, we weren’t worried about either the USSR or North Korea nuking us — but if there’s one thing that has really kept the ‘90s beloved, it’s the music.

There’s something for everyone at the end of the 20th Century, from grunge to gangsta rap to boy bands to Britpop. The ‘90s featured rock’s final years of pop relevance, as well as the blossoming of its underground movements. Hip-hop became a massive cultural force. And although pop wasn’t as strong as it was in the ‘80s, it did have a nice bounce-back period near Y2K.

Capturing the essence of the wildly-divergent ‘90s in just 50 songs is difficult, but I took a swing at it anyways. Let’s dive in:

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

> “Even Flow” by Pearl Jam (1992): Since I’m a Puget Sound native, I should love Pearl Jam more than I do. But sorry, I’ve never been able to muster too much love for the iconic grunge act. That said, “Even Flow” has a great, energetic groove that goes nicely with Eddie Vedder’s bellow.

> “Not If You Were the Last Junkie On Earth” by the Dandy Warhols (1997): By 1997, Nevermind seemed like a century away, as bright-and-shiny pop tunes took over from Alt Nation. So how did indie rock respond? By making a snarktastic, uber-catchy power pop jam about how “heroin was so passé,” complete with a music video featuring dancing syringes. The ‘90s were wild, guys.

> “Crash Into Me” by Dave Matthews Band (1996): If Greta Gerwig gets to admit that this song is actually good despite the oddly skeevy lyrics at times, then so do I. Just forget about the time they dumped 800 pounds of poop in the Chicago River and let Dave’s froggy voice whisk you away.

> “Metal Detektor” by Spoon (1998): America’s most consistent indie rock band wouldn’t reach their heights until the early 2000′s, but “Metal Detektor” is a solid lo-fi preview of the groovy, nervy tunes to come.

> “All Star” by Smash Mouth (1999): Forget the memes and Shrek and remember that this song is iconic for a reason. Did it age badly? Absolutely. But that’s part of its dorky, wonderful charm. And like every young Millennial, I know every word by heart. HEY NOW

#50: “Inbetweener” by Sleeper (1995)

One thing I love about Britpop is its fondness for character vignettes. Pulp were masters of this, and Blur occasionally dipped their toes in that pool, but even the B-listers knew how to nail a depressed-suburbanite character study.

“Inbetweener” tells the story of a married couple who settled for each other. They weren’t each others’ first-choices, they were just supposed to be “inbetweeners.” By the time they’ve settled into adulthood, their lives have descended into complete boredom, but they’re also too lazy to change anything. It’s the black hole of mediocrity.

Sleeper does a stellar job making the story pop, with a sunny sound to balance out lead singer Louise Wener’s deadpan vocals. In a way, it’s a bit ironic that a pop-rock song with a chorus this anthemic would be about the most boring lives imaginable, but I imagine that was sort-of the point.

#49: “When I Come Around” by Green Day (1994)

Bay Area legends Green Day went 100 percent into the pop side of pop-punk with the infamous graduation anthem “Good Riddance.” But I’ll always prefer their earlier, snottier side, which balanced the two genres perfectly.

“When I Come Around” is a song so maddeningly catchy that it doesn’t even matter that drummer Tre Cool utterly fails to stay on beat, occasionally slowing down and speeding up. Thank god for Billie Joe Armstrong’s timeless melody and crunchy guitar tone, both of which keep this song afloat, along with a solid slap-bass. 

Honestly, the amateur vibe of “When I Come Around” is endearing nearly 25 years later, when most mainstream rock feels aggressively focus-grouped. Even Green Day would become much more polished later on (not that this was always bad), so it’s nice to see the youthful energy and passion on display.

#48: “Jesus Freak” by DC Talk (1995)

There were many subgenres that peaked in the ‘90s that I’ve already mentioned, but there’s one more movement that had its prime years in this era: Christian rock.

...wait, wait, don’t click away yet! I’m not trying to proselytize here — some ‘90s Christian music could pass as the real deal. A few, like Jars of Clay, even notched a mainstream hit. But no Christian rock band was bigger among the youth-group set than DC Talk, who never really crossed over to secular audiences. And their signature song, “Jesus Freak,” is absolutely ridiculous — and that’s what makes it great.

Christian music in the ‘10s is mostly bland and focus-grouped to death. If you can tell one Hillsong or Lauren Daigle tune apart from the next, you have better ears than I. But “Jesus Freak” was a strange beast. Instead of joy or thankfulness, its primary emotions are defiance and rage. They even worked with the same music video director as Nine Inch Nails! Amy Grant would never. (although she certainly had her mainstream pop sellout moment in the ‘90s)

Does “Jesus Freak” have some embarrassing lyrics about John The Baptist’s belly? Of course. Does it blatantly rip off “Smells Like Teen Spirit?" Definitely. But, most importantly — is it a banger? HELL (err...heaven) YEAH.

#47: “Vapour Trail” by Ride (1990)

Shoegaze is definitely a sound that I respect more than I actually like. Personally (as you’ll see later on this list), I prefer its more structured, catchier cousin, dream pop.

But Ride managed to find the sweet spot between My Bloody Valentine and top-40 with their sweetly melancholy “Vapour Trail.” It definitely has all the hallmarks of shoegaze — it’s very spaced-out, the lyrics are both romantic and depressing, and there’s a definite wall-of-sound feel to it — but there’s also an actual hook. Thanks to its jangly guitars and orchestral coda, it almost feels like The Smiths’ take on the subgenre.

#46: “Enter Sandman” by Metallica (1991)

Why yes, I am that loser that’s never been able to get into metal, yet loves the simpler pleasures of “Enter Sandman.” What can I say — it’s a total jam and the hooks are plentiful.

It’s honestly kind of hilarious that this song became a massive success right as R.E.M. and Nirvana were rapidly shifting what popular rock sounded like, because “Enter Sandman” leans much heavier towards cheesy, over-the-top hair metal than grunge. I can’t get enough of James Hetfield hamming it up on the mic, literally cackling like a Disney villain at a few points.

For me, the corniness is part of the fun here, along with the raw energy that the band brings to the song. “Enter Sandman” let the masses headbang along with the metalheads, and for that, I’m grateful.

#45: “...Baby One More Time” by Britney Spears (1998)

Here’s proof of how massive Britney Spears’ debut single was: I was in preschool when it was released, and I knew it just as well as the Sesame Street or Arthur theme songs at the time. “...Baby One More Time” was a staple of Radio Disney, which was my main exposure to non-Christian music before elementary school (that, and Thriller, of course). Those opening piano stabs were etched into my brain from a very early age.

There’s a good reason it’s stuck with me: Britney’s breakthrough smash is a pop classic. “...Baby One More Time” captures the passion of a teenage crush better than almost any song from its era. And Max Martin’s crystal-clear, melodramatic production is untouchable. Frankly, it might still be Britney’s best song, over 20 years later.

#44: “Animal Nitrate” by Suede (1993)

One of the first major Britpop anthems, “Animal Nitrate” is a swaggering, cocky ode to the UK’s finest glam rock. Marc Bolan would’ve killed to write something this seedy and catchy.

In a way, it serves as sort of the mid-point between Blur and Pulp’s winking snark and Oasis’ hard-charging stadium-fillers. Just add a nice dose of sleaze. Suede weren’t able to keep up the momentum from their landmark debut, but at least they have classic singles like “Animal Nitrate” that cemented their legacy as pioneers.

#43: “Born Slippy .NUXX” by Underworld (1996)

I’m not normally a fan of super-long electronic songs. In fact, this will be the only representative of electronica — a fairly popular scene in the late ‘90s — to show up on this list.

But “Born Slippy” is special. First off, to be completely honest with y’all: I’m a bit biased, since the track was famously featured in Trainspotting, one of my favorite ‘90s movies. So it was always going to have positive connotations for me. Beyond that, “Born Slippy,” more than any other classic electronica song of its time, is bonkers. After a long, atmospheric intro, it’s essentially five and a half minutes of rambling, drunken chaos over a thudding drum beat (with one little break in the middle).

It’s both minimalist (a good chunk of the song is just a drum machine and chanting) and maximalist (IT’S SO LOUD). “Born Slippy” is the audio equivalent of losing your mind, and I love every second of it.

#42: “Groove Is In The Heart” by Deee-Lite ft. Q-Tip (1990)

And here’s a dance song with the complete opposite vibe! While Underworld turned their thumping beats into cold, confusing chaos, Deee-Lite only has one mission with their classic one-hit-wonder: to soundtrack the greatest party of all time.

“Groove” just about succeeds in that goal, too. The bassline and clattering percussion are untouchable, the lyrics are pure nonsense in the best way (more dance songs should throw in Dr. Seuss references), and the group even snagged funk legend Bootsy Collins to throw in some random ad-libs here and there. 

Q-Tip, a budding legend in his own right, contributes a nice verse, but the real draw here is Deee-Lite’s aggressive quirkiness. Where else will you find a dancefloor filler that includes slide-whistle solos?

#41: “This Is How We Do It” by Montell Jordan (1995)

New Jack Swing — the subgenre that mixed R&B smoothness with hip-hop beats and attitude — might have peaked in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s, but its best track came way after its pinnacle.

“This Is How We Do It” will always be an effective crowdpleaser. Somehow, Montell Jordan found a way to balance street smarts with a squeaky-clean jam perfect for a Bar Mitzvah. He essentially perfected Will Smith’s formula, but Jordan had an extra advantage: his golden vocals. Yeah, his rapping is a bit corny, but you can’t deny that voice.

The ‘90s had plenty of gangsta-lite party jams like “This Is How We Do It,” but thanks to Jordan’s charisma and a deathless chorus, this one stands above the rest.

#40: “Movin’ On Up” by Primal Scream (1991)

If you’re going to rip off the Rolling Stones’ “You Can’t Always Get What You Want,” you might as well go for the jugular and only steal its massive ending.

“Movin’ On Up” is absolutely shameless in that regard, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t effective anyways. This gospel/classic-rock pastiche is four minutes of straight euphoria: Uplifting lyrics! Jazzy piano! Soaring guitar solos! And of course, a gospel choir so powerful that their voices break through the noise like the Kool-Aid Man. 

Primal Scream were smart enough to let the choir take over the second half of the song, just letting the vaguely-religious vibes ride itself out. Because of this brilliant decision, “Movin’ On Up” is somehow more danceable than the rest of its album, the acid-house landmark Screamadelica.

#39: “Just A Girl” by No Doubt (1995)

Riot grrrl, an aggressively feminist brand of indie rock, was an important ‘90s subgenre, but rarely a commercially successful one. Still, there were some acts that polished up that style of angst and packaged into something different yet still great, and one of them was No Doubt.

Although Gwen Stefani might be more well-known to most millennials for teaching us all how to spell bananas, her best song might still be “Just A Girl.” It’s a pretty simple concept — woman is righteously upset by how society coddles her because of her gender — but Stefani sells with her flexible vocals and loads of personality. She shifts from an exaggerated Betty Boop pastiche to a Californian alt-rock wail within seconds.

The rest of No Doubt are able to keep pace with their frontwoman, bouncing back and forth between the springy verses and mosh-friendly, speedy choruses. It’s a good fit for Stefani’s manic energy, and a nice burst of bright energy to bring a close to a dreary era of rock.

#38: “Ruff Ryders’ Anthem” by DMX (1998)

Forget shiny suits: If I’m listening to late ‘90s hip-hop, I’ll take the rawer pleasures of DMX every day of the week.

On his breakout hit “Ruff Ryders’ Anthem,” DMX began to hone his now-legendary untamed style, although it’s a bit more subtle than how he would sound a few years later. It’s not quite as bombastic, but in some ways, that makes this feel a little more like the real X. It literally sounds like a mobster making threats, and it just happens to rhyme and be over a killer beat.

There’s all the ridiculous lyrics you’d expect from DMX here — highlights include the wonderfully emo couplet “All I know is pain/all I feel is rain” and a coda that’s simply a machine gun firing and X yelling “TALK IS CHEAP, MOTHERFUCKER!!!” But for the most part, it’s proto-DMX, and it’s interesting to see a larger-than-life figure somewhat grounded.

#37: “Friday I’m In Love” by The Cure (1992)

The first couple years of the ‘90s are flooded with awkward ‘80s leftovers, but one wonderful (and very ‘80s) song that snuck into the next decade is “Friday I’m In Love,” The Cure’s final hit.

It’s shocking that something this bouncy, simple and optimistic came out the same year Nirvana and Pearl Jam dominated the airwaves, but great music can succeed at any time. Robert Smith’s nursery-rhyme melodies and lyrics are so simple that it’s shocking that this song wasn’t actually written ages beforehand.

And it’s refreshing to hear a band famous for getting angsty pull out a happy-go-lucky love song tailor-made for romantic comedies. At some point, Smith had to write an upbeat song, right?

#36: “Everlong” by Foo Fighters (1997)

There’s an argument out there that “Everlong,” written by Foo Fighters frontman and former Nirvana drummer Dave Grohl, is better than any Nirvana song. I cannot remotely agree (spoiler: Nirvana places much higher on this list), but I can understand why “Everlong” has such a strong reputation.

Easily the best Foo Fighters song, “Everlong” is everything you’d want in a radio-friendly alt-rock single. It’s catchy, but still has some legitimate grit and bite. Propulsive and anthemic, yet still angsty and relatable. Grohl somehow took a grimy post-grunge banger, added romantic lyrics, and made it work. I certainly can’t imagine Bush or Everclear pulling that off.

#35: “Wannabe” by Spice Girls (1996)

In less than three minutes, five British women kicked down the doors of alt-rock and birthed the late-’90s bubblegum pop boom with one song. And what a glorious burst of energy that song is.

"Wannabe” might be the most purely fun song on this entire list. From the springy piano beat to each of the five girls showing off their bold, feisty attitudes (except for Posh Spice...sorry, Victoria), to Scary and Ginger Spices’ cheeky rap breakdown at the end, it’s impossible not to like. The song is a bit repetitive, yes, but when you have nuclear-grade weapon hooks like these, you might as well use them. ZIGAZIGAHHH

#34: “Fake Plastic Trees” by Radiohead (1995)

And now to the exact opposite side of British music!

Not to be that annoying contrarian, but I’ve never been able to get into Radiohead. A lot of their music is too cerebral for my tastes — I don’t mind thoughtful lyrics or experimentation, but I need a hook or a groove to grab onto.

Still, I do have a fond spot for their early years. And “Fake Plastic Trees,” my favorite song of theirs, is the perfect midpoint between grunge angst and sweeping Britpop balladry. 

The lyrics are abstract, yet Thom Yorke’s yearning, cracked vocals convey more than any words could’ve. Like one of my favorite modern acts, Japanese Breakfast, his voice acts simply as another instrument to convey the heartbreak. Match that with a slow-burn power ballad fit for a rom-com credit roll, and you’ve got an instant classic. It’s really too bad Radiohead got bored with this sound...

#33: “It Was A Good Day” by Ice Cube (1992)

Ice Cube is not normally a happy guy in his classic songs. Whether he’s pissed at the cops or his former bandmates, he’s usually in a bad mood for some reason. But for his most beloved track, Cube imagines what a day with no problems would be like, and it’s sublime.

He nabs a triple double on the court without trying. He gets to bang a chick he’s been trying to have sex with since high school. He seemingly wins every game of bones and craps he plays. And most importantly, the police and gangs didn’t hassle him.

Many gangsta rap songs are about turmoil and chaos, but “It Was A Good Day” shows that even the toughest thugs just wanted some peace and to have a good time.

(although if it was a really good day, the Supersonics would’ve beaten the Lakers...)

#32: “Hunger Strike” by Temple of the Dog (1991)

This song is so Seattle that the CD single probably came with a complimentary damp flannel, a Dick’s deluxe, and coffee stains.

It’s a bit surprising to me that there hasn’t ben any Seattle artists on the list proper yet, seeing as the city was the epicenter of ‘90s culture. Obviously, grunge played a role, but this was also the decade when Starbucks, Microsoft and Amazon blew up; the decade when the Sonics and Mariners had superstars like Gary Payton and Ken Griffey, Jr. (the Seahawks had to wait another decade to hit their stride); the decade where the Emerald City’s reputation changed from South Alaska to one of America’s iconic locales.

And before Nirvana and Pearl Jam took led that charge, “Hunger Strike” was the first grunge breakthrough, and for good reason. In a way, it’s sort of the Watch The Throne of grunge, with Chris Cornell and Eddie Vedder exchanging vocals. The chorus, when Vedder sings the hook while Cornell bellows “I’M GOING HUNGRAAAAAAAAAAAY” like a madman, gives me goosebumps every time. 

Honestly, I like this lighter-waving ballad more than any of Pearl Jam or Soundgarden’s actual songs. Not sure why this connects with me more — perhaps it’s the four minutes of raw emotion and wailing vocals over gorgeous harmonizing guitars. Vedder and Cornell work shockingly well together, too. I wish the duo made more music.

#31: “Connection” by Elastica (1994)

There is no Britpop song that’s cooler than “Connection.” While most of the subgenre is all about wink-wink cleverness or gigantic classic-rock riffs, Elastica dispenses with both of those for Justine Frischmann’s snarling attitude.

Elastica kept things very simple on their most iconic single. There’s a rudimentary guitar riff (which yes, they stole from Wire, but who cares), a steady beat, and Frischmann rolling her eyes over the whole thing. “Connection” is not a song that needs a lot of explaining: one listen, and you’ll instantly understand why even American teens couldn’t resist the snark.

#30: “Alison” by Slowdive (1993)

Slowdive’s masterpiece, Souvlaki, might have been a bit late to the shoegaze party by 1993, but it and its iconic leadoff track, “Alison,” have stood tall over the movement regardless.

My favorite shoegaze song, “Alison” is a hazy soup of distorted guitars, hypnotic drums and hopelessly romantic lyrics about a druggy (and possibly imaginary?) relationship. About half of the lines are about drugs and confusion, and lead singer Neil Halstead describes the titular woman as his anchor through the chaos of life. It’s a slow-dance made for a goth prom, and it lingers in your brain long after it’s over.

#29: “Baby Got Back” by Sir Mix-a-Lot (1992)

“Baby Got Back” has unfortunately become sort of a punchline by this point. Not because it’s a clunker —I think most people seem to love it as much as I do — but because of its constant feature in kids’ movies (I first heard it in Shark Tale as a child...the early ‘00s were a strange time) and the fact that the song has been boiled down to just a few lines. 

“I like big butts and I cannot lie.” “Oh. My. Gawd. Becky, look at her butt.” “My anaconda don’t want none unless you’ve got buns, hon.” Those moments define “Baby Got Back” more than anything else.

Which is a shame, because it’s a masterpiece of trashy fun. Seattle icon Sir-Mix-a-Lot somehow found out how to make solid punchlines about booty for four minutes — you try coming up with that many iconic moments in a short timespan! And the dizzying production, with its sharp horn bursts and super-tight bassline, is no joke.

"Baby Got Back” might be a goofy novelty track, but there’s actual effort put in. It’s a formula more artists should strive for.

#28: “California Love” by 2Pac feat. Dr. Dre and Roger Troutman (1995)

Yes, this is the cliché 2Pac choice. But “California Love” is difficult to resist.

Backed by a rowdy Dre beat (and a great opening verse from the Dr. as well), Pac’s comeback single after being released from prison is truly timeless. You go to any L.A. party or sporting event and it’ll inevitably be played (partly because it’s strangely clean for a gangsta rap anthem). And 2Pac is game to shout out the entire state — he even gives Sacramento props over 20 years before Lady Bird!

Pac has some deeper, more introspective songs than “California Love.” But sometimes, the basic pick is the right one.

#27: “Summer Babe (Winter Version)” by Pavement (1992)

Pavement has always been the cool kids’ ‘90s band. While the massive alt-rock acts put their raw, bleeding-heart emotions on display, Pavement kept things sardonic and snarky. They were willing to poke fun at The Smashing Pumpkins. They’re essentially the Jim Halpert of rock — kind of lazy and self-removed, but with too much charisma to ignore.

Yet, for all their snarky bonafides, my favorite song of theirs is one of their more emotional. “Summer Babe” still features Stephen Malkmus’ famously flat, dry vocals, but the song has some real heft to it regardless. The deep-fried guitar shredding its way though the track and the noisy drums work well amongst the sloppy-but-charming sound. It’s meandering, but when Malkmus puts some juice in his vocals for the final minute, it still strikes a chord. 

#26: “Deceptacon” by Le Tigre (1999)

By the late ‘90s, punk icon Kathleen Hanna had already moved on from her massively influential riot grrrl band, Bikini Kill. Distorted guitars were so 1992. What was next? ‘80s nostalgia, of course!

“Deceptacon,” by Hanna’s other famous band, Le Tigre, is a sizzling slice of new wave perfection. With its proudly-analog synth stabs and dance beat, the song perfected the indie-band-goes-disco formula 10 years before everyone else tried it. Seriously, this sounds way more like 2009 than 1999, and it’s shocking that its somehow from the 20th Century.

But “Deceptacon” isn’t purely a Duran Duran tribute — there’s still that same fury that Hanna was famous for. Her raw vocals make for a strange, yet captivating combination with the poppy beat. It’s a punk song you could dance to, just like the Ramones always wanted!

#25: “Fantasy (Bad Boy Remix)” by Mariah Carey feat. Ol’ Dirty Bastard and Puff Daddy (1995)

There might not have been any ‘90s popstar bigger than Mariah Carey. She racked up 14 number-one hits, including “One Sweet Day,” a monster R&B collaboration with Boys II Men that is still tied for the longest stay at the top of the charts (if only it was a better song). 

However, she’s never been my favorite — overwrought R&B ballads really aren’t my thing. But she did release one single that I unabashedly love, and that’s partly due to an assist from one of hip-hop’s weirdest stars.

I’m still not sure why the powers that be felt that Carey, a super-polished pop balladeer, and Ol’ Dirty Bastard, a rapper who sounded and acted like a homeless man on bath salts, was a good combo. But it worked beautifully! ODB’s weirdo charm proved to be a nice balance to Carey’s more sanitized sound. And the pop structure reigned in ODB just enough — although that didn’t stop him from spending the first 45 seconds just shouting out random places (“JAPAN ARE YOU IN THE HOUSE?!?”) and later quoting Donny and Marie Osmond. The man was a maniac.

But arguably what makes the song work better than either artist’s contribution is that sparkling production. The remix of “Fantasy,” helmed by Bad Boy mastermind Puff Daddy, strips back the original song’s heavier sampling of the ‘80s classic “Genius of Love” to just the groovy bassline for most of the song, letting the synth burbles wait until the chorus to pop. The result is one of the few truly great American pop songs of the mid ‘90s.

#24: “Blue Jeans” by Blur (1993)

Despite their relatively low placement on this list, Blur are my absolute favorite band of the ‘90s. They helped create one of its prominent movements, Britpop, with their 1992 single “Popscene,” and went on to dominate the subgenre. And when they got bored with that sound five years later, Blur proved they could do angsty, distorted alt-rock just as well as the Americans. (And five years after that, lead singer Damon Albarn started a fun little side project — you might have heard of them.)

But my favorite song of theirs doesn’t really fit into either Blur’s eras. Technically, “Blue Jeans” was released on their first Britpop album, Modern Life is Rubbish, but it doesn’t really have the same witty, uber-English vibe as their hit singles from that time. Instead, it’s a low-key, almost dream-pop song that’s simply about being content in a relationship. 

Sounds a bit boring, until you actually listen to the track — Albarn’s melody here is stunningly beautiful, yet down-to-earth, and the quaint music backing him matches the vibe of the song exactly. And his lyrics nail the early stages of love — “I don’t really wanna change a thing/I wanna stay this way forever.” There’s few songs that capture the simple joys of a romance like “Blue Jeans,” particularly in the honeymoon period.

#23: “Forgot About Dre” by Dr. Dre feat. Eminem (1999)

The defining sound of West Coast hip-hop — the squealing synths and trunk-rattling bass of G-Funk — was mastered by one man in the early ‘90s. Dr. Dre’s The Chronic was a landmark for the genre in 1992, and his iconic style can be heard from MCs throughout most of the decade.

But by 1999, things had changed. The biggest names in hip-hop sounded nothing like Dre’s signature sound, from Puff Daddy’s sample-heavy pop-rap to the chaotic Southern twang coming from No Limit Records. Dre was seen as a has-been, a relic.

However, “Forgot About Dre” ended Dre’s slump that year. The funky Chronic beats were supplanted by a sharper-edged, metallic production over which Dre publicly shamed the world for ignoring him and his legacy. It’s a ballsy move to already anoint yourself as a legend just 11 years after you burst onto the scene, but with Dre’s track record, he could afford to do so. And although he’s not the greatest rapper technically, he spits with enough force and charisma to sell his snarling lines.

Dre also had a partner to give him a boost: the then-newbie Eminem. A lot of Em’s big 2000′s hits have aged badly in my opinion — the production is awkward and there’s too much homophobia — but he sounds sharp as hell on “Forgot About Dre.” His verse is arguably the song’s highlight, as he unleashes a rapid-fire, charmingly random verse with endlessly quotable lines.

“Forgot About Dre” cemented Dre’s status as a titan of the industry who could seemlessly create new trends and stay afloat through multiple decades. And with it being one of Eminem’s breakout moments, it also proved Dre could be a kingmaker.

#22: “You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette (1995)

The ‘90s were the decade of angst. So what better climate was there to release a scathing takedown of an ex, who may or may not be one of the dudes from Full House?

Okay, so it’s never been confirmed that “You Oughta Know” is actually about Dave Coulier. But that doesn’t lessen its rage and impact. Morissette is seething with rage about this breakup, writing all-time classic lines like “Does she know how you told you’d hold me until you die/’Til you die, BUT YOU’RE STILL ALIVE” and of course, “Are you thinking of me when you fuck her?!”

Morissette perfectly uses the era’s classic quiet-loud dynamic shifts to her advantage, creepily whispering at the start of the verses, and slowly growing louder and angrier until she’s screaming her lungs out by the chorus. Her ragged, off-kilter vocals perfectly capture the blinding emotion she feels. It’s a karaoke staple for those who’ve just been dumped for a good reason.

#21: “Big Pimpin’” by Jay-Z feat. UGK (1999)

That Timbaland beat. Dear lord. How can it sound so good against three radically different flows?! The man is truly a genius.

Yeah, Hov and Bun B and Pimp C all deliver here too, but let’s not pretend that beat isn’t the reason why this is a top-shelf Jay-Z single.

#20: “Larger Than Life” by Backstreet Boys (1999)

Yeah, it’s better than “I Want It That Way.” Not by a lot — they’re both perfect — but I’ve always preferred upbeat boy band songs to ballads.

“Larger Than Life” was named accurately. From the second the thumping beat kicks in, the song is a stadium-filling anthem, the kind arena-rock bands would’ve written a decade prior. Does it have a chorus that’s easy to scream along to at concerts? Check. Does it have a beat you can awkwardly groove to? Check. Does it have a bad-ass guitar solo thrown in? Shockingly, yeah.

Boy bands were the true rockstars of the late-’90s (apologies to, uh, Matchbox 20?), so it would only make sense to have one of them create a bonafide rock anthem. And when you match the Backstreet Boys’ sugary hooks with a roaring atmosphere worthy of Def Leppard, you’ve got a classic on your hands.

#19: “The Fly” by U2 (1991)

‘90s U2 is the best U2. I love Joshua Tree and Unforgettable Fire as much as the next guy, but I’ll take their weirdo, aggressively-ironic decade over their more earnest years any day.

Perhaps no song encapsulates U2′s ‘90s ethos better than “The Fly.” It’s got a slinky, nocturnal feel to the music, with The Edge’s guitar distorted slicing through like a machete. The swirling, tripped-out guitar solo here might be his greatest ever.

But like many U2 songs, “The Fly” belongs to Bono. In it, he plays the titular sleazebag from hell (literally — the song is about a crank call from down there), whispering sweet nothings into the listener’s ear. Do the lyrics actually mean anything? Honestly, I’m still not sure, but they still somehow sound transgressive and witty, if a bit corny. But you’ve got to expect a little corn when U2 is involved. And when Bono duets with himself on the sublime chorus, both as The Fly and in a piercing operatic falsetto, it’s one of the best hooks of the band’s career.

“The Fly” was the world’s introduction to the new U2 in 1991, and although it might have shocked people expecting another “With Or Without You,” it’s aged beautifully over 25 years later.

#18: “Heaven Or Las Vegas” by Cocteau Twins (1990)

Cocteau Twins are usually held up as dream pop’s forefathers, helping create a distinct, hazy sound that would inspire future artists from The Cranberries to Beach House to Washed Out. One listen to “Heaven Or Las Vegas” proves why the Scottish trio was such an inspiration.

“Heaven Or Las Vegas,” the title track to Cocteau Twins’ flawless 1990 album, is one of the most immaculate, gorgeous songs of the decade. Invoking both heaven and Las Vegas was accurate: the track is graceful, yet also drenched in neon synths and glitz. It perfectly toes the line between holiness and kitsch.

And here’s where I admit that, like most people, I can’t make out 90 percent of what vocalist Elizabeth Fraser is singing. Beyond belting out the title of the song in the chorus, the rest sounds like French, or speaking in tongues. Regardless, her ethereal alto is a perfect compliment to the swirling keyboards and gauzy guitars floating around her in space.

#17: “All The Small Things” by Blink-182 (1999)

In the classic video for “All The Small Things,” Blink-182 spends the entire runtime clowning on the TRL-era boy bands of the time. Here’s the ironic thing about that video: “All The Small Things” is secretly the greatest boy band song of the ‘90s (yes, that means *NSYNC didn’t make the list...their best songs came out in the early aughts, sorry).

Blink-182 are technically a pop-punk band, not a boy band, but you wouldn’t really know that from their most iconic, and best, hit. “All The Small Things” is direct, punchy and has a monster sing-along chorus. Sure, Tom DeLonge’s nasal whine isn’t a typical teen heartthrob voice, but young Justin Timberlake had an unusual voice too (“IT’S GONNA BAY MAAAAE”). 

The fact that “All The Small Things” is basically a bubblegum Trojan horse for Hot Topic kids is exactly what makes it so great. Chugging guitars can peacefully coexist with a TRL-ready melody and surprisingly romantic (if simple) lyrics. 

#16: “Gin & Juice” by Snoop Doggy Dogg (1993)

Nowadays, Snoop Dogg is probably more known for his intense love of weed, unwillingness to turn down collaborations, and friendship with Martha Stewart more than any new music. But Snoop’s earned the right to ease into being a hip-hop elder statesman, thanks to his landmark album Doggystyle and its standout single, “Gin & Juice.”

The young Snoop (only 22 at the time!!) had already nailed down his trademark, chilled-out drawl by 1993. He uses it to great effect on “Gin & Juice,” describing a wild house party filled with sex, drugs and alcohol like it’s just another regular day at the office. You can practically hear his knowing smile in the verses, and the chorus sung by D-Ruff is infectious as hell.

Of course, major credit has to be given to Dr. Dre’s G-funk production. It’s my favorite beat of his from this era, and its dog-whistle synths and shuffling beat perfectly fit the early-’90s California party vibe. 

#15: “Semi-Charmed Life” by Third Eye Blind (1997)

This is probably the only song in history to take heavy lyrical influence from the Doug theme song and simultaneously be about crystal meth.

It shouldn’t be hard to explain why “Semi-Charmed Life” is a classic, right? It turned an insanely bleak topic into one of the sunniest, most propulsive jams of all time. The rap-singing in the verses is a blast to keep up with, and that falsetto “goodBYYYYYYYE” in the chorus is the ‘90s equivalent of the high note in “Take On Me”: often-attempted in karaoke, with a very low success rate.

The late ‘90s had no shortage of great, weird pop jams, and “Semi-Charmed Life” is near the top of the pile.

#14: “Say It Ain’t So” by Weezer (1994)

My favorite ‘90s album will always be Blur’s Parklife. But my second choice would probably be Weezer’s self-titled “Blue Album,” a nerdy power-pop masterpiece. It’s an angstier mirror of The Cars’ 1976 debut, also self-titled; appropriate, seeing as Cars frontman Rik Ocasek produced Weezer’s first album.

The record’s centerpiece is the heartbreaking “Say It Ain’t So,” a perfect power ballad. The band nails the quiet/loud/quiet dynamic shifts from the mumbling verses to the supercharged chorus. There, Rivers Cuomo scratches his vocals, displaying his emotional wounds after alcoholism tore apart his family. 

For a band known for very silly songs like “Buddy Holly” and “Beverly Hills,” the passionate bridge, where Cuomo first wails away vocally before making his guitar do the same in a fiery solo, is truly heartbreaking. “Say It Ain’t So” proved that California dorks could pull off sadness just as well as the flannel-wearing Seattleites, if not better.

#13: “My Heart Will Go On” by Céline Dion (1997)

Earlier this year, Avengers: Endgame moved past Titanic on the all-time box office charts. As much as I enjoyed Endgame, this feels wrong. Sure, Marvel is a big deal, but was Endgame as much of a phenomenon as Titanic? No. Frankly, it’s not even a top-5 Marvel movie (although it is better than Avatar, which Endgame could pass soon for first place). 

Why has Titanic cemented itself in pop culture history? Part of that is because the movie is a stone-cold classic, featuring a frothy romance between two of a generation’s greatest actors that ends in unspeakable tragedy and heartbreak. But I believe there’s another aspect to the film that’s helped keep its legacy strong: its unsinkable theme song.

“My Heart Will Go On” is one of the greatest movie themes of all time, precisely because it mirrors its movie. Like Titanic, Céline Dion’s signature song starts as a tender, soft romance, before bursting into a dizzying climax that pummels the audience into submission, forcing tears.

I don’t think I need to emphasize that Dion is a fantastic singer — there are very few singers that could nail both the cooing opening and the Whitney Houston-esque belting at the final chorus. But “My Heart Will Go On” is still occasionally considered a punchline, and that’s just wrong. Any song with this much emotional heft and force cannot be taken lightly.

#12: “What’s The Frequency, Kenneth?” by R.E.M. (1994)

Two of Gen X’s longest-lasting and most important acts, U2 and R.E.M., switched roles in the ‘90s. U2 shifted their image from overly-earnest arena-rockers to weirdos dabbling in underground sounds. Meanwhile, their American counterparts went from mumbling college rock jams to radio-friendly ballads.

Not to be a total snob, but I’ve always preferred R.E.M.’s jangly ‘80s sound over their blockbuster early ‘90s albums. But the lead single off their underrated 1994 record Monster might be my favorite song of theirs.

“What’s The Frequency, Kenneth?” sounds like very few other R.E.M. songs. There’s no mandolins, and Michael Stipe’s lyrics are much clearer (although they make little sense). Instead of being bouncy and light, the guitars are a blast of crunchy distortion, not far off from a typical Smashing Pumpkins song.

In fact, Peter Buck’s guitar work here is what makes “Kenneth.” His echo-y sound adds a raw texture to the tune. And although the lyrics are a bit cryptic (apparently it’s about Boomers trying to advertise to Gen Xers? I have no clue), Stipe’s melody is on-point, as usual.

Although the sound of alt-rock had long passed by R.E.M.’s original style, “Kenneth” showed that the Georgia legends were more than able to keep up.

#11: “Steal My Sunshine” by Len (1999)

This sunburnt ode to being young and dumb in the gloriously young-and-dumb late ‘90s is the greatest summer anthem of all time. And the greatest one-hit-wonder of all time.

“Steal My Sunshine” is the soundtrack to driving with the windows down, goofing with your friends and pretty much any positive aspect of summer. Gloriously dumb and kitschy-fun summer songs like this are perfect examples of why the late-’90s was a golden age for pop.

#10: “Man! I Feel Like A Woman!” by Shania Twain (1997)

While we’re talking about that late-’90s pop boom, how crazy is it that the era’s best single is technically a country song? 

Of course, “Man! I Feel Like A Woman!” is barely a country song — yes, there’s some violins and slide guitar buried in the mix, but there’s also a thundering synth riff and Twain barely has a Southern twang (makes sense, seeing as she’s Canadian). And there’s no mention of any country tropes like pickup trucks or whiskey in the lyrics.

What “Man!” does bring to the table is a tongue-in-cheek, groovy pop-rock jam that’s just as easy to love as it is to make jokes about. Sure, it’s corny as hell — see the obvious joke in the song’s title — but Twain is clearly having way too much fun to care. And in a decade filled with angst and irony, a super-cheesy pop jam like this probably seemed like a needed salvo.

And the Mutt Lange production on this has some serious oomph to it. Before his extensive work with Twain, his then-wife, Lange was arguably best known for mastering the roided-out arena rock sound of the ‘80s, assisting on classic tunes from The Cars, AC/DC and Def Leppard. He even gave us this beautifully ridiculous Billy Ocean track, which might be the greatest song ever written. Lange brings some weight to “Man!”, making Twain’s female-empowerment anthem an actual anthem.

Listen, if this song isn’t for you, I get it. But for those of us who have the prerogative to have a little fun, “Man! I Feel Like A Woman!” is the pinnacle of one of pop’s greatest eras.

#9: “Check The Rhime” by A Tribe Called Quest (1991)

A lot of ‘90s rap hasn’t aged well, even if it’s still a ton of fun. Albums from Dr. Dre and Puff Daddy and even Jay-Z can sound like time capsules. But that’s not a problem that A Tribe Called Quest has, as their smooth jazz-rap still sounds timeless and perfect.

“Check The Rhime” is the Queens group’s brightest highlight off of their 1991 magnum opus, The Low End Theory. It’s a simple setup: MCs Q-Tip and Phife Dawg introduce the other rapper by reminiscing about freestyling on street corners back in the day. Then, both Tip and Phife get their own verse, each stuffed with playful lines and life advice — Industry Rule 4080 still holds to this day.

Unlike a lot of ‘90s hip-hop that was trying desperately to either be menacing or cool, Tip and Phife ooze effortless charisma on their verses in a playful, almost childlike way. Phife starts his verse reminding everyone “how nice I am” (before proclaiming that he flips off “punk MCs”). Tip even seems to diss MC Hammer by saying “rap is not pop/if you call it that then stop,” but apparently, this was meant as a defense of the then-megastar. Maybe.

“Check The Rhime” works partially because of its funky, minimalist production, but also because the Tribe’s two rappers were born to spit non sequiturs and awkward brags over a jazz-rap beat until the end of time.

#8: “I Wanna Be Your Joey Ramone” by Sleater-Kinney (1996)

I’m not sure how flamingly hot of a take this is, but I’d say Sleater-Kinney is the greatest band in Northwest history. Yes, better than Nirvana. 

1997′s Dig Me Out is a flawless masterpiece, and there’s not a single dud in their eight-album discography. Unlike many of the major Washington acts from this era, the Olympia three-piece never lost relevancy, releasing some of their strongest work in the 2000′s.

But Sleater-Kinney’s best single, “I Wanna Be Your Joey Ramone,” is actually from one of their early albums. And it serves as a thesis statement for the decades of great music to come.

Legendary guitarist Carrie Brownstein takes over vocals here, nailing both the sardonic verses and the thrilling, off-kilter chorus. “Joey Ramone” tackles an interesting subject: how almost all of indie rock’s heroes up to that point had been male. So when Brownstein wails about wanting to be Joey Ramone or Thurston Moore, she’s placing Sleater-Kinney in the pantheon of rock greats. And this was just their second album.

Luckily, Sleater-Kinney had the goods to back up their chutzpah, and “Joey Ramone” became prophetic.

#7: “Supersonic” by Oasis (1994)

Just a couple months after Kurt Cobain’s death, two unibrowed guys from Manchester (and the rest of their band) completely upended the rock world with their band Oasis’ debut album, Definitely Maybe. After a few years of gloom-and-doom dominating the genre, it, along with fellow hit albums from Blur and Pulp, helped usher in the brighter world of Britpop in the mid-’90s.

That album’s first single, “Supersonic,” is still the greatest thing Oasis ever produced. (Yes, it’s better than “Wonderwall.”)

“Supersonic” is a blast of rude, snotty rock-n-roll cranked up to 11. In an era of irony and sarcasm, lead singer Liam Gallagher was spouting out nonsense lyrics like they were the most important and coolest thing in the world. And for the four-and-a-half minutes of this song, they probably are.

Everything about “Supersonic” is boneheaded perfection, from the thunderous drums to the dual guitars, one crunchy, one soaring; all the way to Liam’s sneer. This is prime Oasis, the band running on all cylinders. Based on how ramshackle this sounds, it’s no wonder the band only stayed great for two albums. But at least we’ll always have that legendary start.

#6: “1979″ by The Smashing Pumpkins (1995)

On the opposite end of the cool spectrum as Oasis and Sleater-Kinney, you have Billy Corgan — singer/songwriter/control freak of The Smashing Pumpkins and alt-rock’s most weaselly, petty figure. But say what you want about him as a person, Corgan wrote some incredible alt-rock pop nuggets.

“1979″ is a major outlier in the Pumpkins’ discography. It’s not an angsty shoegaze/grunge banger or an orchestral power ballad. It’s a low-key, skeletal new-wave track that perfectly captures the boredom and aimlessness of youth.

While many songs about being a teenager capture either its euphoric highs or angsty lows, “1979″ is one of the few classic songs that nails the in-between moments. It’s the feeling of walking to the 7-Eleven with your friends, cracking jokes that you’ll probably forget the next day. It’s about sitting in a parking lot and just waiting to leave your hometown.

"1979″ isn’t a grand gesture, but in a backwards way, that makes it even more profound. And from a band who typically dealt in soaring, intensely emotional songs, it was a brilliant change-of-pace that will no-doubt be relatable to teens for a long time to come.

#5: “Rebel Girl” by Bikini Kill (1993)

Two massively important alt-rock movements came from the Puget Sound in the early ‘90s. One is grunge. The other is riot grrrl, centered around a group of furious, political women-led bands in Olympia. And although Sleater-Kinney may be the subgenre’s longest-lasting act, its brightest moment came in 1993 with Bikini Kill and their incendiary single “Rebel Girl.”

Lead singer/songwriter/punk icon Kathleen Hanna is the focal point of “Rebel Girl,” wailing away on the microphone about an unnamed woman who is just the absolute coolest. The woman is described as a confident, revolutionary lesbian figure who would serve as an inspiration for angsty teens across the globe.

And oh yeah — “Rebel Girl” absolutely shreds. It sounds like there’s maybe 18 guitars going at once on the track, and Tobi Vail’s drum work is fearsome. Just to give more rock cred to the song, it was produced and features guitar work from Joan Jett. The rock legend and Bikini Kill made a great pairing, creating a song that sounds angry, with its distorted guitars and punk drums, but is actually a triumphant feminist anthem for the ages.

#4: “Linger” by The Cranberries (1993)

In an early-’90s rock scene filled with distorted guitars and raw angst, The Cranberries broke out in 1993 with a song that sounded nothing like the crowd. And over 25 years later, their stunningly gorgeous single “Linger” has aged far better than most of the grunge and alt-rock it was surrounded by.

The Irish four-piece took inspiration from Cocteau Twins’ and Galaxie 500′s dream pop and just made the hooks even more bulletproof and melancholy. “Linger” is the kind of ballad that’s a perfect fit for a longing prom slow dance and for crying with a tub of Ben & Jerry’s on the couch after a break up.

The late Dolores O’Riordan’s lilting vocals are a miracle here, able to express both hope and resignation. Her heavy Irish accent helps the vocals become another instrument in the band’s sweeping wall of sound, alongside the jangly guitars, marching-beat drums and orchestral swells.

It’s the most beautiful song of an ugly (in a good way!) decade, and arguably the greatest dream pop song ever written. The Cranberries would later adopt the heavy guitars of their Seattle peers, but “Linger” is still a high-water mark for the subgenre.

#3: “Juicy” by The Notorious B.I.G. (1994)

The first verse alone could’ve gotten “Juicy” into this list’s top 10. It’s one of the most-memorable and quotable verses of all time, exquisitely detailing The Notorious B.I.G.’s rise to fame. And then we get two more stellar verses?! 

“Juicy” is frequently cited among one of the greatest hip-hop songs of all time, and it’s deserving of that reputation. Biggie penned the definitive rags-to-riches story in just five minutes (honestly, more like four, as he and producer Puff Daddy let the beat ride for a bit at the end) and then blessed it with his silky-smooth, commanding flow.

What separates “Juicy” from other come-up anthems is the vivid detail Biggie gives us, both about his impoverished Brooklyn upbringing (“We used to fuss when the landlord dissed us/No heat, wondered why Christmas missed us”) and his stunning rise to fame (“Girls used to diss me/Now they write letters cause they miss me”). He even brags about owning a Super Nintendo AND a Sega Genesis, which was the biggest early-90′s flex possible.

Of course, knowing the tragic ending of Biggie’s story, “Juicy” has a bit of a bittersweet feeling to it now. But its ‘80′s-retro beat and infectious glee can still bring a smile to my face every time I hear it.

#2: “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana (1991)

Well, duh.

There is no song that encapsulates an entire decade and generation like “Smells Like Teen Spirit” does for the ‘90′s and Gen X. It famously changed the entire rock landscape nearly overnight from sleazy hair metal to grimy alt-rock. It’s one of the most famous and iconic songs ever written. And shockingly, it still retains all of its revolutionary power nearly 30 years later.

How does “Smells Like Teen Spirit” pull off the balancing act of being a time capsule, yet still sounding remarkably fresh? I believe it’s because it captures the raw feeling of visceral rage and confusion better than nearly any song. Most angry songs have a target, whether its racist politicians, stuffy adults, or even a crappy ex. “Teen Spirit” has no tangible reason for its angst. Kurt Cobain’s lyrics are famously nonsense. And that’s what makes the song so brilliant.

Because the song is so emotionally powerful in a visceral way, it really doesn’t matter that the lyrics are meaningless. All you need to love the song is to connect with the anger buried deep, and start moshing the moment Dave Grohl’s instantly-recognizable drum fill meets the clanging guitars. It’s a total banger.

Cobain might not have had the intent of creating a generational anthem that would last beyond Gen X. But as long as people feel “stupid and contagious” alongside a creeping rise of angst, waiting to burst, “Teen Spirit” will remain relevant.

#1: “Common People” by Pulp (1995)

For a subgenre entirely built around a particular country’s culture, most major Britpop acts surprisingly refrained from politics. Oasis never sniffed the subject, and while Blur got close, songs like “Parklife” or “Stereotypes” were more winking jokes than bold statements.

Then there’s Pulp. Their most beloved track, “Common People,” is a scathing attack on the British upper class who indulge in poverty tourism, unaware of how the other half really lives. And it’s the best song of the ‘90s.

There are few things I love more than a perfectly executed story-song, and lead singer/songwriter Jarvis Cocker gives listeners a doozy here. “Common People” is about a rich woman talking to, well, a common person, and she decides she wants the poor guy to show her how to “live like common people.” Cocker’s songwriting is very literary, going into detail about the woman’s history and her botched attempt to act poor while shopping for groceries, as well as all the lower-class problems the wealthy will never understand. As Cocker bluntly puts it, “If you call your dad/he could stop it all.”

“Common People” is just as furious as “Teen Spirit,” but Cocker has clear targets here: the one-percent, and the misguided idea that poverty is somehow cool. The song starts calmly, almost at a whisper, but by the final, heart-pounding climax, Cocker is wailing away, condemning the upper-class with gusto.

The swelling disco-rock groove channels this anger into an absurdly catchy tune — an odd combination of musical tone and lyrics, but one that’s effective. It’s a giant middle finger that you can sing along to.

Britpop might have ended, but the sentiment of “Common People” is still fresh today as a righteous anthem for the trod-upon. 

[metronomecharisma]

TL ;DR : I am myself for good, I confess a lot of stuff, I love make-up and tights, I love my friends so fucking much, and I want everyone to be proud about themselves.

I promised a full story about me wearing tights and make-up and stuff some days ago on my Insagram account. So here it is. I didn’t know if I wanted to share it with you when I started writing it, but In fact I think it’s necessary to share all that with you. I want you to know this story and that I wanted to be myself for good.

Let’s start from the very beginning. I always had a great sensitivity, and some attraction for things that modern society calls “girly things”: hugging your friends, crying, writing our deepest feelings on a diary, having long hair, watching romantic films, loving flowers, loving pink, and a lot of other things. Pretty early I was attracted by beautiful clothes and attitudes that wasn’t « male ». I remember that when I was a child, when I was 6 or 8 (mom help me pls), I had a doll named Léa, and I loved taking care of her, to comb her, to tell her my secrets. I admit I also had weird experiences about discovering sexuality with that doll. I don’t have anymore souvenirs with her, but she was with me for some years, with a little blanket I still have now that one of my aunts, that now live far away from earth since 2004, offered me when I was a baby.

I didn’t have any problems by being me in primary school, despite being shy. I started to had troubles to be a “good boy” when I was in college. Almost every boys in the school was mad about me because I wasn’t male enough : I didn’t have pricey shoes, joggings, hats, vulgar language and stuff. Also I wasn’t into rap music. I grew up listening to Mylène Farmer, Nirvana, Daniel Balavoine, and even Guerilla Poubelle tho. So I forced myself to be a “good boy”: listening to (bad) rap music, wearing baggys, being a stupid disrespectful teenager (wish I could be a grunge or skramz teenager tbh), lying to myself, refusing to face my feelings, my wishes, my sensitivity, my feminity. When I was in my last year of college, I started having access to the internet, and I discovered the whole emo thing through some friends that was in that movement and recommend me some websites and elements of style. It wasn’t at all the “punk” side of emo that I discovered years later, it was all about “scene” stuff, and to be honest, I was completely blown away back in the day… I saw girls and guys with make-up, long and colored hair, lots of colored or pretty dark clothes, slim pants, with lots of feelings… I was like “wow, guys can be like them and being happy and popular and shit. It’s real…”. When I was on the internet at this time, it was for like one or two hours in a whole week because my father was super restrictive and wicked. So I managed to find the password of the computer of the father, and I passed lots of sleepless nights writing feelings on stupid blogs with scene aesthetics before he woke up to go to work… I was looking for recognition, I wanted to feel good about myself, and I refused to be alone because yeah, I felt terribly alone in my family, by beginning to love metal music, by affirming my style, my sensitivity… My father laughed a lot at me because of my sensitivity, because of the way I dressed, my way of expressing myself… The more I asserted myself, the more he mocking me and was violent against me. He hated me when I was a teenager, when I was a scene kid, when I decided to put eyeliner on me, to wear slim pants, to have long and “girly” hair… The more I was hurt by him, the more I wanted to go further and being even more myself each day. He never wanted to hear myself when I was sad, when I wanted to talk with him about life and stuff. I never had any good souvenirs with him, he was never there during my scolarity, he never learned me anything. He never wanted to have sons, only daughters. So at least, he wanted me to be a « good boy ». And I wasn’t that straight dude… And I wasn’t sorry. He wasn’t sorry. One night, he wanted to kill myself, because I stayed 10 more minutes than my authorized time limit on the computer, and I was sad and I needed to speak about myself, when no one was here for me. He grabbed my throat and strangled me with all his might, shouting “I’ll kill you!” He passed the night with cops.

Anyway, during those nights, I learned how to be myself, how to express feelings, how to talk to that kind of people, how to be like them. I met some great people, wonderful women, especially this girl with whom I had a strong relationship for a year, during my 17th year, and with whom I lived proudly my androgyny, she loved that, she even did my hair pretty often, and put makeup on me… I was really lucky, and hey, thank you so much for that, Jessica, you are a great part of who I am today. And yeah, I also met bad people. I made bad stuff too at this time, I was a stupid coward guy during a year, when I was 16, I hurted a joyful and adorable girl called Alison by thinking too much about myself, and I played the victim of the break-up. I’ll never be sorry enough for that, I was a stupid dickhead with her, I acted like my father: constantly being ignorant, constantly being on the Internet. Hope she’ll find that post one day. During those nights, I learned how beautiful a guy can be by being “girly”, androgynous… And I also learned that a good amount of them was terribly macho, with violent thoughts against women, and I strictly refused to think that way. I wanted to be myself, but why girly men were violent against the girls they wanted to look like? Do I really wanted to be like them? Why I started to thing and act like them, like my father? Maybe I wanted to be a good guy in the end, for being accepted, because it was the way I was born, because those androgynous boys themselves needed to be « good boys », because they just wanted to exist for girls and having sex and stuff. At this time I hated the idea to have sex… It’s another debate tho. Then by growing up, I searched again and again who I was, who I wanted to be. Not like them, not a male, just… me ? But fuck, who the hell I was? One thing was sure : I was alone, and never wanted to be a « good boy ». I was lost. I got some friends of course, but I wasn’t able to see them often because of my father, and mom who was under his authority. Then I was 18, the scene movement was almost dead, but I still wanted to look like this but not thinking like most of the boys in that movement, I think I reached a point where I really felt good about my look. I met a girl in my new high school that was half kawaii and half metalhead, and she was seduced by the way I dressed, my hair, the fact I was a guy with make-up and someone that was “out of step with the world” in our shitty parisian suburb. We spied each other during 3 months, she was pretty talented for that : she succeeded to have my MSN address (yeah, MSN, feel old now?) through a classmate she had missionned for making me sign a false petition… This was fucking crazy haha ! We spoke during a crazy amount of hours in MSN, then met during a cold and snowy day of December. She was so cute with her childish attitude and her yolo lifestyle… I admit her boy-ish side charmed me too. The first six months was some of the best in my young life. She encouraged me to continue to be myself, to leave my house where I suffocated more and more each passing day. I did it, I moved to her bedroom (she lived with her mother), and finally it was time for me to be free… I was wrong. I will not go into details, but she forced me to be someone I didn’t want to be, wanted to rob me and deprive me of my privacy, my sensitivity, my privacy, my friends, my website, my music tastes, my femininity. I had no right to approach her, to cuddle or kiss her, while I wanted to give her tons of love, sweetness, warmth, to tell her how she was cute and unique, how she was courageous to fight the malady that will paralyze her arms and legs, how I was frustrated, disappointed, terrified of this situation, how I missed the herself of that 22 December of 2012 so fucking much. When we made love together, it was completely cold and distant… Like, there was no love, no complicity, she wanted me to have sex, but didn’t want it at the same time… It was so weird. So I didn’t know how to act. I always was 100 % gentle and caring with her in those moments, but she remained cold, silent… I remember to sob out and wanted to scream loud as fuck one night after making love this way once again, and stifle my tears and my breath as hard as possible on the pillow so she wouldn’t hear me, and then she asked me “Yo, you’re OK?” and was like “yeah, all is fine!”, and we fell asleep, and so it went on for two years. I was afraid every day of having missed something because of my way of being, I was afraid to not being here enough for her, I was afraid, afraid of everything, afraid of me. At the end of this relationship, I lost all trust and self-esteem in myself, I repressed everything I had built and deconstructed, I just wanted to end everything and eventually wanted to start again from zero. Ultimately, to flourish as a good boy would be the way to spare me worries and being in peace with everything? I believed it.

I began to acquire somewhat disgusting ideals about women, alternative lifestyles, I started to have short hair, to be dressed like a fucking businessman, I started to troll everywhere, to be misanthropic and selfish… I was the complete opposite of the real me. I started to make friends this way, but none of them was good people, or safe. I was in a way to fucked up even more my already well fucked up life. And fortunately, even if it was super bad done at this time, I was always thinking, every time, every hour, every fucking second. And I was thinking about my actions, I was convinced that I made all that shit to be someone, to exist. But I cowardly close my eyes because I was someone to some people, I wasn’t alone. Then I finally started to REALLY start from zero the day I realized my actions were bad and wasn’t at all soothing or constructive for me and people around. It was scary as fuck but it was the best decision I ever made about me. I again isolated myself by forgetting these bad relationships, I thought about what I really liked to do, live, feel, see, listen, say, eat, drink… It took me 3 years. 3 years to find myself again, to deconstruct and reconstruct everything. To remember how the fuck I loved putting eyeliner on me, to be cheesy and lovely as fuck with people, to support every fucking kid who was alone, who was oppressed because of the way they felt with themselves, the way they dressed, their identity… Since I took over my life in hand, since I really decided to make something cool with my blog, that I really am myself, I met fantastic people, I lived perfect, wacky, unforgettable moments, I realized that my life is beautiful in spite of everything that happens around us, and it’s more and more beautiful thanks to this group of friends who consolidates since last year. I’m so fucking happy with myself since I’m cheesy and feminine and sensitive and expressive again. I think I look great, I’m happy by seeing myself this way in the mirror. When I tried that floral tights some days ago, with a grey tie-dye short above, it was completely unreal. It was like I waited to see me this way since my birth, I found myself so great… Like never before. I had tears of joy and flourishing in my eyes. No lies.

I can’t being 100% this way at work, unfortunately. Maybe 80% of myself can be showed to customers? I can’t wait to find another job where I can be totally me, it will be hard, but I think I can find it… Well, I hope :’) I’m feeling more myself than ever with that floral tights, with that black shorts, with my fringe and long hair, with eyeliner, with nail polish, with my childish attitude. And 100% of my actual friends and lots of punx people love me this way, and I can’t thank them enough for this. Some people aren’t aware yet of all I say on this post before reading this, so hey mom, hey dad, hey family, hey facebook friends : here’s your non-binary small vegan skramzkid, more happy and proud than ever, struggling with bad looks in the streets but not giving a fuck about it in the end, saying fuck you to every racist, sexist, machist, transphobic, ableist people, living his life fully because we only have one, taking care of each friend, each life around me, being me, being him, being her, being good. A super cool friend asked me what pronouns to use to talk to me… You can use they/them and “iel” for french people. Also “he” or “she” none will disturbs me, I feel good in my boy’s body as in my femininity, the most important for me is to feel good about myself. Maybe one day I’ll feel better with one pronoun rather than the other. Maybe. Who knows, life’s surprising, right ? :)

Hey everyone, please, be proud of who you are. Your body & mind are fucking YOURS. We only fucking living once, it’s OUR time, OUR lives. You are great, you matters, you are beautiful, you are NOT alone, no matter the age, color, origins, « imperfections » you have. Please, don’t let common people tell you how to dress, to think, to live, to love, to have sex, be YOU, ALWAYS. And if you are against all that, FUCK YOU, unfriend me, unfriend every of my friend, forget me, I don’t want you in my life because I live AGAINST you.

*insert all the lyrics of « rather die young, than die young at heart » of Rainmaker* « Mais d'où vient cette étrange impression de sentir mes mots se briser sous ce bloc de discours agencés, sous le poids du pré-pensé… Advienne que pourra, j'ai fait mon choix. Désolé mon gars, encore libre à moi de refuser ce qu'on t'a inculqué, je n'ai pas à m'y plier, à ton mal à penser ! Encore libre à moi de refuser ce qu'on t'a inculqué, ce qu'on veut m'imposer ! » Belle Epoque - Le mal à penser.

Yours truly, Guillaume.