#i know i have some things here to work on too salute emoji

[toestalucia]

anyway does anyone want a lil ask or two<3 if u want a specific setting/verse/timeline/etc feel free to say so, otherwise i got this:] if u want any of my other muses thats great too

[beardedjoel]

sugar rush

joel miller x f!reader

event masterlist prompt: your desperate neighbor, joel miller, runs out of candy for the trick-or-treaters and comes to you. it turns out you've both been keeping a secret from each other; 4.7k words warnings: mostly cute fluff and pining, makeout sesh, they stay flirting, joel miller is a gentleman *saluting emoji* a/n: loved writing a fluffy little piece for my ppcu darlings for this event, happy halloween and i hope everyone enjoys all the fics we've been writing for you all!

The last thing you’d wanted was to do something extravagant for Halloween this year. You watched friends planning to go out to parties, ones with kids plotting all their family costumes. But what you really want is a peaceful night in, passing out candy and eating popcorn with a scary movie in the background, spending time in your own cozy cocoon. Work has been relentless the last few months, stressful and draining, and you’re happy to just relax with candy stolen from your candy bowl for the trick-or-treaters. 

The first hour of little ones comes and goes, all of their costumes more adorable than the last, getting a chance to quickly catch up with some of your neighbors as they pass through. It’s just the evening you wanted, you convince yourself once again as you listen carefully to your popcorn in the microwave to make sure you don’t overcook it. 

You feel a twinge deep inside, maybe some kind of loneliness hitting you while you feel the emptiness of your home pressing in on your heart. You’d not been having the best luck with dating recently, you knew that, and refused to believe the real reason was that there was someone you were interested in, but didn’t have the heart to pursue it. So instead, you had spent the better part of this week persuading yourself you were happy to spend the holiday by yourself, to get this much needed alone time. 

You silently thank the universe when your doorbell rings again, bringing you out of your thought train that was heading towards a swift derailing into depression. You put on a smile before whipping the door open, expecting another group of kids dressed to the nines. Instead, your eyes flick up from child height to your neighbor, Joel Miller. He’s standing in a faded black band t-shirt that’s hugging his biceps, and when you finally pull your eyes to his face, it’s adorned with a shy little smile on his lips. His hair looks like he’s been running his fingers through it a few too many times today, tousled and sticking up, and his tan skin looks somehow stunning in the shitty light of your porch. How he manages to look this good all the time baffles you.

“Joel? Um, hey,” you stutter out awkwardly, hoping he can’t see that your cheeks now feel like they’re burning as they always do when you meet his intense, chocolatey gaze. “Here to trick or treat? I’m not sure what your costume is, though.”

Joel chuckles, his face lighting up and you feel your insides warm at the fact that you made him laugh. “Wish I was, but no. I actually, er…” He rubs the back of his neck nervously. “I ran out of candy, was hopin’ I could…” he says, the last part more quiet, half hoping you didn’t hear his embarrassing confession. 

“Oh, y-you need some?” you reply, fidgeting your fingers in front of you. You glance over at your candy bowl, still over half full - you tend to go overboard on most things, and this was no exception. Anxiety had taken over you in the grocery store aisles and made you a different person, filling your cart with way more candy than accounted for kids in your neighborhood.

“I figured, y’know, think I might know ya best around here, and well, your light was on. The McCarthy’s don’t seem to be participatin’ this year.”

You have a flurry of emotions - amusement at Joel’s predicament, excitement that he’d chosen to come to you, and absolute screaming, jumping up and down joy that he’d thought he knew you the best of all his neighbors. The outside of you nowhere near matches the inside as you just give him a sweet, reserved smile.

“Those cranky bastards,” you say with a chuckle that Joel reciprocates. “Well, come on in, you can have some of mine. It’s kind of slowed down the last little while, though. But feel free to take whatever you need. Lord knows I don’t need this much leftover candy in my house tomorrow.”

“I’d kinda like to see you runnin’ around your lawn with a sugar rush, though,” Joel teases as he steps inside and you close the door behind him. Your brows raise slightly in surprise - Joel seems in an uncommonly great mood tonight. Not that he’s unkind, by any means, he’s just not typically the most chipper person you’ve ever met. 

“Not so funny when I crash and pass out and you have to drag me back inside,” you quip back to him, and his smile goes a little crooked, which sets your heart jumping inside your chest. You’d been harboring a bit of a crush - okay, more than a crush, you admit to yourself - on your neighbor for a while now, too afraid to say anything about it, or even flirt too forwardly most of the time for fear of rejection. You figured he was just a nice guy, and you had helped each other out in a pinch a few times, attended a few of the same barbecues, or waved as you passed by. You���d fallen more quickly for his gorgeous little accent and rugged looks than you’d cared to admit to yourself, and these feelings didn’t seem to be going anywhere any time soon. You’d even started to wonder lately if the reason your dating life hadn’t been the most lively and successful was that you were still holding out hope that maybe, just maybe, Joel felt the same way about you. 

“Might be kinda a good look for me - neighborhood hero an’ all, savin’ you,” he says, his smile growing a bit. 

You roll your eyes playfully, feigning hurt. “And at my expense? That’s cold, Joel Miller.”

Joel laughs and holds up a small bag he’d brought over, hoping to take home his spoils. He’s filling it when the doorbell rings another time, and you start a little, so caught up in watching his broad, muscled form moving. You rush over to open it to a few small kids standing outside, not over the age of eight or so, all screaming TRICK OR TREAT! You laugh heartily and greet them all, gushing about how perfect their costumes are. You hold out your bowl of candy to them, letting them choose what they’d like and they all giggle at your compliments and little jokes. 

Joel has stopped to stare, enamored with your sweetness in this moment, how good you are with the kids. Hell, Sarah is much older than these three little ones, but he’d seen how good you are with her, too. She seems to adore you, asking after you any time it’s been a while since she’s seen you. Joel’s lips tug up into a smile, just now noticing how cute your Halloween pajamas are - black bottoms with little jack-o-lantern’s printed all over them and a black tank top. Now that he was noticing, he tries not to bite his lip when he sees just how tight the tank top is, how well it hugs your body as it slides up along your back a little when you bend down towards the kids’ level.

You wave your goodbye and turn back to Joel, face glowing from the big grin you’d put on for the kids. 

“So cute, right?” you say, hiking a thumb over your shoulder towards the front door.

“Miss that age,” Joel murmurs before he can stop himself. He promised himself he wouldn’t wallow too much tonight, and here he was telling the first person who had the misfortune of talking to him. Sarah chose to do a sleepover at a friend's house tonight, the first Halloween she was spending that didn’t involve Joel. Sure, they’d done the pumpkin patch and carved them after, apple picking with Sarah fulfilling her promise to bake Joel an apple crisp, and watched some of their favorite scary movies together. It still hurt that his little girl was Trick or Treating in another neighborhood without him tonight, maybe one of her last ones ever as she neared those teenage years. 

“S-sorry, didn’t mean -” Joel starts, cutting himself off from the deep thoughts he’d tumbled into.

“No, hey, it’s okay. Sarah’s got plans tonight, I take it?” you ask, sincerity and compassion sparking in your eyes. Joel finds himself dangerously close to falling into those two pools, your sweet soul shining through as you look at him.

“Mhm,” Joel replies, scratching a hand through his beard. “She uh, wanted to do somethin’ at a friends’. Don’t blame her, just… y’know, one of those things.”

You give Joel a sympathetic half-smile, letting out a sigh. “I’m sorry, Joel. That is tough. I’ll bet she’s feeling a bit sad about it too, even if she’s having fun.”

“Better miss her old man at least a little bit,” Joel replies, trying to lighten the mood.

“Old man? I don’t see any old men in here,” you say, gazing around the room with a fake curiosity, your brow furrowed. Joel spits out a laugh and shakes his head.

“Too kind, darlin’. For that, and the candy.” He holds up the bag full of candy and starts towards the door. Your heart lurches every time he throws out one of his Southern little pet names, and you have to forcibly keep your face neutral as you bask in it. “Well, uh, thanks. I owe you,” Joel finally says.

You pull your bottom lip into your mouth and worry with it as Joel’s hand seems to inch towards the door in slow motion. 

“W-wait,” you say, before you’ve even realized the word has left your mouth. “I was watching a movie - would you want to, um, stay and watch with me? Pass out candy together?”

Joel blinks a few times, and you feel your stomach sink, until he breaks out in a sheepish smile, his cheeks flushing a bit. 

“I’d like that, yeah.”

“Oh,” you nearly start, mostly having expected him to say no for some reason. Maybe you just haven’t accepted the fact that Joel does seem to enjoy your company as much as you do his. “Great,” you flash a smile, gesturing over to the couch. You walk over and sit down, and Joel follows closely behind, peering around at your setup.

“Popcorn ready and everythin’,” Joel comments with an impressed whistle, settling onto the couch next to you, the distance between you enough that you’re hoping you can stay focused on the movie. His warmth radiates though, his broad shoulders looking so damn big, fuck, on your couch and his legs spread open as he relaxes back a bit. You try to make your shaky exhale as discreet as possible before grabbing the popcorn bowl from the table and plopping it between the two of you.

“What are we watchin’, then?”

“Killer Lake 3. oOooh,” you tell him, wiggling your fingers in an attempt to make it sound creepier, but Joel just laughs and shakes his head at you, running his fingers over tired eyelids.

“Ain’t seen that one yet, makes me kinda nervous, that uh, whole series,” he admits, and you kind of like the idea of knowing something small and intimate about him, something vulnerable.

“Me too,” you admit, holding back a chuckle, your hand over your mouth.

Joel sits forward, shooting you an incredulous look. “And yet you were watchin’ this… all alone in your house?”

“It’s called living on the edge, or something,” you reply with a laugh. “Besides, not alone anymore, am I? I’ve got a victim to suffer with me.”

Joel huffs and crosses his arms. “Just play the damn thing before I can chicken out.” He settles back again, but you can feel the tension radiating off of him as he never fully relaxes, his body taut while he keeps his arms tucked into each other. You find yourself hoping that at least part of the reason he seems tense is he’s just as nervous as you are to be sitting so close on the couch together, able to feel the heat of each other’s bodies, the scent of the other person permeating the space. You try not to breathe in too noticeably when you catch the smell of him - musky, a little outdoorsy, and something else a little less like his natural scent, an aftershave or deodorant. It’s all equally intoxicating, you think to yourself, trying not to let your brain become too muddled by it.

The doorbell rings several times while you two are watching, each time you and Joel pause the movie to coo over the little trick or treaters together. You feel your heart flutter at the thought of those who don’t know you two, who would think you’re just any other couple living together. Your insides are nearly bursting at the thought, not realizing just how badly you’d wanted that with Joel, this sweet domesticity. Now that it was within your reach, a little taste of it playing over in your mind, you don’t know how to go back to how things were before this night.

The movie still isn’t finished when 8:30 hits, but you get up to turn the porch light off, signaling the end of the trick or treaters for the night. Joel stands up awkwardly in your living room, hands fiddling in front of his belly. He clears his throat and glances at the carpeting before he looks back up to you. 

“Love to stay, and finish the movie off, if that’s alright,” Joel offers before you can even say anything, and you nod eagerly. “Couldn't leave you all alone with this scary shit now.”

“My hero,” you tease, calling back to your earlier conversation. You clasp your hands over your heart with a grin, and Joel chuckles, rubbing his neck.

When you two sit back down, you start to realize that every time you've gotten up from the couch to give out candy and sat back down, you and Joel have gotten a little more comfortable, bodies less rigid and tense, able to sit a little bit closer to each other. You realize you’ve barely been paying attention as the movie plays again when Joel makes a sound at something happening on the screen, so you try to focus so he can’t tell just how affected you are by his presence or how lost in thought you are. 

“S-shit,” Joel calls out, jumping a bit in his seat, clutching his chest with one hand. The other one flies over to your thigh, where he holds on for dear life, squeezing you there. He quickly pulls it off, before you can even fully register it, trying at the last second to memorize the feeling but coming up short, too stunned to even believe that it really happened. Joel seems to tear his gaze from the movie, both of his hands clutched in his lap, fiddling nervously. 

“I’m - uh, I’m sorry ‘bout that. Just got me jumpin’, didn’t mean to, well…” Joel stutters out, gesturing to your leg. You’re sure if the room was more light, you’d see a flush creeping over his cheeks. He can’t believe he’s embarrassed himself in front of one of the most beautiful girls he’s ever known, one he’s sure is completely out of his league. It hasn’t stopped him from being excited to see you every time he’s had the pleasure of getting to have a conversation with you or simply see you pass by his house on a walk or run. He’s in deep, he knows it, and now he may have just ruined his chance to reveal his feelings to you the right way. 

“Oh,” you say plainly. “It’s totally fine, I nearly did the same thing,” you say with a chuckle, trying to laugh it off. 

You feel the skin on your thigh buzz beneath your pants where his hand had been for that brief second though, and your heart doesn’t seem to be interested in calming down its incessant thundering. You want more, you want to feel his hand back right where it was, the strength of his arm slung around your shoulder, his touch nearly anywhere on your body. You’ve never been alone with Joel this long and it’s starting to get to you, sending your mind reeling.

That brief touch suddenly has you gathering up your courage, so you turn your body to face Joel a little better and breathe in deeply.

Now or never. 

Your heart thuds harder and your stomach tightens into knots, but you strengthen your resolve and square your body a little, trying to give yourself a false confidence. 

“Actually…” you say, clearing your throat quietly. Joel’s attention quickly snaps from the television back to your face, and you nearly lose any semblance of bravery at his gaze locked so firmly on yours. “I didn’t mind, at all. If you wanted to do that again, or anything like that, uh, maybe,” you tell him, cursing yourself for stumbling on your words, for making it sound so unsexy to ask him to put his hand on your thigh. 

You pull your lips inward and press them together, sure that your widened eyes are giving away the complete terror you feel as you await his reply. It feels like years creep by of his face looking completely taken aback until you see the corner of his mouth twitch up, his eyes starting to go a little softer with a twinkle in them. 

“What, like, uh,” Joel clears his own throat now. “Like this?” 

His hand slides over from his lap, much slower and intentional this time, landing on your thigh, right above your knee. It feels like heaven - his grip firm and protective but also soft and caring at the same time. His fingers flex a little, giving away his nervousness before he settles on a few errant rubs of his thumb. 

“Yeah” You give him a toothy smile. “Like that.”

“Wouldn’t mind one bit if you wanted to hold onto me, an’ all that. Since the movie’s so scary, ‘course,” Joel says, sounding more bashful than you’ve ever heard him with his voice lowered.

You feel yourself smiling wider and wider, your face nearly feeling like it’s going to crack soon with the excitement you feel. Joel’s own heart is fluttering more than it has in ages and he wills it to calm down before he gets too excited about his crush, for Christ’s sake, simply cuddling with him. 

“Of course, since the movie’s so scary,” you tease, biting your lip anxiously. You tentatively scoot closer to Joel, pressing your thighs flush with his as you curl up on the couch, tucking your feet up next to you on the opposite side. You bring your hand up to his bicep, wrapping it around the muscle before gingerly laying your head onto his shoulder. Every movement feels a little stiff at first, testing these new and exciting waters with each other.

Joel lets out a quiet hum of satisfaction, one he’s not sure that you heard until you sigh lightly in response and his heart leaps along with yours, the two of you tensely holding one another. Joel feels you start to relax first, your attention half back on the movie, and he takes the initiative to let go of some of his own tension, letting his hand wander a bit more on your thigh.

By the end of the movie, you and Joel are entwined together, his arm slung behind your shoulders, your hands clasped together and palms sweaty from the intensity of the film and being so close to each other. You’ve migrated onto the top of Joel’s chest, resting your head there. Joel thinks he’s died and gone to heaven as he keeps getting delicious whiffs of your shampoo at that angle - a scent he tries to burn into his memory for when this evening inevitably ends. 

When the credits start to roll, neither of you move, not wanting to break whatever spell it seems the two of you are under. Joel reaches for the remote, turning the movie off before tossing it aside and resting a finger under your chin. He gently pushes, urging you to tilt your head to look up at him. The little, curious noise you let out at his touch makes Joel’s insides instantly turn to fire, his body tensing up and muscles going taut. Just the touch of his calloused finger under your soft chin has a heat licking up your spine, then settling deep inside your gut.

“This was nice,” you murmur, now looking up at him and blinking slowly. He can hardly believe that the look in your eye - the starry, eager, content look - has anything to do with him. His eyes drift down to where your lips look so pouty and inviting right now, parted slightly as you wait to hear from him. 

Joel leans forward a little, sliding his fingers up from your chin to your cheek, cupping it softly. He brushes his lips across yours, so lightly you can barely feel it at first, sensing his hesitancy. You meet him in the middle, and you can feel the smile on his lips as they meet yours in full, pressing into you with a romantically soft kiss. You moan wantonly into it, having wanted and dreamed of this moment countless times. Your hand cups his face in return, gently scratching your fingers through his beard and he lets out his own satisfied groan now before pulling away. 

“That okay?” he asks quietly, his voice a hoarse whisper.

“Joel,” you say, your own voice barely above a whisper. “I’ve been wanting that to happen for like, almost a year now, so yes.”

Joel blinks hard in surprise. “That long?” he asks, his tone going lower with suggestion as his brows quirk a little. He keeps his hand on your cheek, rubbing along your jawline with his thumb. 

“Mhm. That long,” you murmur with a nod, closing the small gap between your faces once more as you press your lips into his. You make a small moaning sound deep in your throat and barely pull your lips off of his to utter feels nice. 

Your enthusiasm urges Joel on, a quiet groan making its way out of his throat as he deepens the kiss, sliding his hand from your cheek up to the back of your head and burying it in your hair. His fingers along your scalp feels so heavenly that you can’t help the satisfied mewl that comes out of you.

Joel’s hands start to explore a little more, curving down your back with a firm touch, his fingers tracing along your spine. You nearly shudder and then gasp when his calloused pads find their way underneath the bottom of your tank top, touching bare skin now, the heat of his hands blazing into you. You can feel how heavily you’re breathing already, the tension building and nearly unbearable. It feels like a dream, this moment you’d thought so much about happening, wishing for his touch and his lips and his body just like this. Your hands wrap around his neck to keep him pulled close, desperately trying to keep this moment from slipping away from you.

He surprises you by lifting you onto his lap, hands enveloping your plush hips as he tugs you over to straddle him. You gladly and willingly move your body along to where he guides you, settling on top of his lap with your heart beating out of your chest. It all feels so natural but has you giddy, nearly jumping out of your skin with the quickening pace of your kisses. Your bodies meld to one another effortlessly, your hips sinking down further into his lap as you grind a little into each other.

Every movement, touch, and synced breath is pure bliss as you two continue devouring everything the other is putting out, tongues dancing with one another and now swollen lips pressing into each other. All the pent up longing and burning desire coursing through you now has an outlet, and you try to hold back a moan that pushes up through your throat to not seem too desperate, but Joel beats you to it, a little groan slipping past his lips. He pulls away slowly, peppering the corners of your mouth with a few kisses before slowly opening his eyes, now gazing at you with a heady, half-lidded look. You meet his expression curiously, your heart still thundering as you lazily scratch along the back of his neck.

“W-would it make me look like a complete idiot if I said,” Joel starts, keeping his hands steadily wrapped around your hips, fingers still splayed all the way to your ass. “I wanna take y’on a date before we go any further? Know it’s old fashioned, but…”

You laugh quietly, sincere and sweet, at his honesty and apprehension, watching his cheeks reddening and mouth a little agape as he awaits your reply. You palm his chest with your free hand, spreading your fingers out and brushing them dotingly across the fabric of his tee shirt.

“Not at all,” you tell him, your voice coming out a little cracked, planting a chaste kiss on his lips, savoring the way they mingle so quickly into yours without hesitation. “I think I’d like that, too,” you add on, giving him an encouraging smile.

You see him breathe out, shoulders sagging in relief while his mouth twitches upwards. “Good,” he sighs, “‘Cause I really wanna take you out, darlin’. Been wantin’ to…” he says with a lopsided smile now, leaning back in for another kiss.

“Maybe I’ve been wanting to, too,” you tease, leaning your head down to rest on his shoulder, snuggling into him, letting the moment become comfortable, any expectations on the two of you lifted for now.

“Couldn’t tell or anythin’, by the way you hopped on top of me,” Joel jokes, breaking the tension even more. It feels like any other day, now, like you tease each other while you curl yourself up on his lap all the time. It amazes you how little discomfort or awkwardness you feel right now around Joel despite the major shift in your relationship only moments ago.

“You pulled me up here, you ass,” you quip back, lightly hitting him on his other shoulder.

“That I did, sugar,” he says more sweetly now, kissing your forehead, warm and sticky. “Wanna go out w’me this Friday, then?” he asks, and you pick your head up to smile at him, tenderly curling your fingers around his cheek, still getting used to the feeling of touching him so freely.

“Friday? Not sooner?” you ask, biting the inside of your lip and trying to give him your best version of sweet, pleading eyes.

“Eager, are you?”

You kiss him again in reply, letting your tongue slip into his mouth again and he meets it hungrily with his own, his hands snaking around your back to your ass and squeezing the globes greedily. You can feel his arousal, pressing hard where your warm heat meets his, thighs gripping around his legs tightly. He has to practically tear himself away and you can see the mischief in his dark eyes growing by the second.

“Yeah, me too,” he says, a little breathless now. “Tomorrow, then.”

“Tomorrow is perfect.” You slip off of his lap and plop next to him on the couch again, stifling a yawn now that you’re coming down from the quick boost of adrenaline your make-out session with Joel had given you. 

“I should head out, but…” Joel says when he notices your tiredness, putting a warm hand on your thigh. “I’m lookin’ forward to tomorrow.”

“Me too,” you reply with a wide grin. You stand up from the couch with him, walking to the door together with your fingers brushing, not seeming to want to be without the other’s touch.

“Pick you up right here at 6:00 tomorrow, yeah?” Joel stands in your open doorway, lingering on shifting feet as you nod in agreement. He leans in and captures your lips in another kiss, this one feeling just as new as the others and you instantly lose yourself to it, breathing in his scent and memorizing the feel of his plush lips on yours for the final time tonight.

“Goodnight,” you say quietly, planting one more peck on his cheek, wiry stubble around his beard tickling your lips. He ambles down your walkway, and while you’re admiring the view, leaning against your doorframe he turns back, giving you a sheepish, crooked smile.

“Hey,” he says, stopping where he stands. “Happy Halloween, darlin’,”

You can’t help the smile that bursts onto your face, your heart soaring at the adorable pet name, the locks of Joel’s hair sticking out in all directions, and the near puppy dog eyes he’s giving you right now. This right here, this Joel Miller is one you know not everybody is lucky enough to see, and you’re so grateful you’re getting a glimpse of it tonight.

You lift a hand and wave as you step back inside and call out to him. 

“Happy Halloween, Joel.”

dividers from saradika !

[tickle-bugs]

BUGS YOURE ALIVE!!! Could I bother you for some McKirk? Maybe some bed sharing?? For uh...mission related reasons? Accidental cuddling?? If it's not too much trouble?? Do these emojis help?? 🛏🤣🪶💘

Anything for you beloved!!!!

Suite-Hearts

Bones thinks defecting might genuinely be better than this. 

He’s not twenty anymore, the sight of his best friend shirtless doesn’t fluster him the way it used to, but it’s still…a lot, given the circumstances.

Circumstances being the honeymoon suite in one of the most notorious casinos in the galaxy, a room that couldn’t possibly be big enough for all the feelings that Bones had to fit inside of it.

The room is beautiful, granted—the entire far wall is a floor to ceiling window onto the glittering city lights below. Every inch of the place is plush in a way Bones can appreciate, even if it reminds him vaguely of a padded cell. Stocked mini bar, soundproofing--even a built in white noise stereo. The hotel had been sweet--they’d decorated the place with little hearts and champagne bottles, committed to celebrating the newly engaged couple they’d checked in as. 

But again. The circumstances. 

“Are you gonna glare at me over there all night?” Jim huffs and crosses his legs on the bed. He plays with his hair, still stringy from the shower. 

“I hate this.” Bones clenches and unclenches his fists to stave off the urge to pace. He tears down one of the paper hearts from the ceiling and crumples it instead. 

“Yes, you’ve told me. Repeatedly.” Jim sighs and leans forward, balancing his chin in his hands. “Honestly, Bones, I don’t bite. This isn’t much different than the Academy.”

“Uh-uh. We had bunks in the Academy.” 

“Bunks that we rarely slept apart in, usually. What’s up with you?” Jim drifts over, pretty eyes sloped with concern. The full brunt of the hotel’s fancy pine soap hits Bones. 

“Nothing.” Bones keeps his gaze on the floor. 

“If you hate sharing that much, I’ll try and swing a separate room for you. We can pretend we had a fight or something. I’m sorry.” Jim squeezes his bicep. Bones’s mouth sours at the apology. Jim isn’t apologizing for the room, he’s apologizing for his presence. Bones knows that tone of his and he despises it. 

“It’s fine. I’m just…not the best for these kinds of things.” Bones pinches the bridge of his nose. Guilt swirls and claws at the base of his stomach, making swipes at his throat to try and close it. 

“It’s just for a few days. You’ll never have to do another espionage mission again, scout’s honor.” Jim fumbles his way through the boy scout salute. 

“You were never a scout.” Bones huffs, but the promise soothes him some.

“Semantics.” Jim tries to crack his back a few times. “Want a drink?”

“Your back.” Bones furrows his brow. Jim makes a dismissive noise, scoping out the selection of whiskey and gin on the bar.

“Lay down.” Bones shoves Jim onto the bed with a eyeroll he doesn’t bother to hide. Jim squeaks as he hits the mattress and bounces higher than he expects—gravity’s just a little weird here and Bones can’t figure out how to work the in-room controls. 

He climbs up after Jim and settles heavily on his thighs. Jim grunts a little and Bones affectionately swats the back of his head. 

“M’fine. Really. I’ll go to the spa or something.” Jim hides his face, suspiciously shy, but Bones doesn’t press. Jim talks when he wants to.

“I’m not letting you waste money on that frilly shit. You want a free massage or not?” Bones gives his arms a fond squeeze. Jim nods, then deflates. 

“Where?” Bones reaches for the massage oil. He makes a face at the gaudy and suggestive label before pouring some into his hands. He rubs his palms together to warm it, breathing in the notes of lavender, sandalwood, and something else he can’t quite place. 

Jim makes a noncommittal noise into the mattress. Bones chuckles and smooths his hands up Jim’s back.

Massage therapy had been an optional Academy course but it had always been one that Bones enjoyed. It took a certain amount of trust in a stranger to allow them to know your body in that way. Bones wanted to be that stranger for people, he still does. 

And with Jim, well—what isn’t better with him? That’s comically, cosmically, the problem. Bones knows nearly every atom of Jim’s being, even the ones Jim hides from himself. That’s their deal. They are bonded halves, binary stars, and they care for one another. Even when they drive each other insane. 

“Pressure okay?” Bones hums, working into a stubborn knot near Jim’s shoulder. Jim moans and dissolves into the bed. 

“Quiet down. You’ll make people think we’re really getting a use out of this room.” Bones’s face grows painfully warm as Jim makes another terribly distracting noise. It dissolves into a chuckle. Bones squirrels the entire thing away into a private corner of his brain. 

“S’rry. Feels good,” Jim mumbles, pressing his face further into the mattress. Bones chuckles and continues his work. 

“Stop squirmin’,” Bones huffs, working his way up the back of Jim’s ribs. Jim wiggles around a bit but doesn’t say anything. 

“If I’m hurting you, you gotta say somethin’.” Bones leans down and murmurs, stilling his hands. Jim makes a string of noises, attempts to shake his head into the mattress, then settles on waving his hand around dismissively. 

“Whatever you say.” Bones snorts and smooths his palms over Jim’s warm, soft skin. He finds his lower back and starts over, working his way back up, then down, and up again. The rhythm of it takes them both.

“Doin’ ok?” Bones hums, leveraging his elbow into Jim’s lower back. 

“I’m in love with you,” Jim sighs, then groans, nothing more than a puddle of captain. Bones swallows the surge of emotion in his chest and concentrates on maintaining appropriate pressure of the elbow. 

“Sorry. For the next few days, I’m a taken man.” Bones skimming his fingers slowly up Jim’s back. Jim shivers and grabs fistfuls of the blankets. He traces patterns between mottled scars and freckles, a little lost. 

Jim twitches again, muffling something high-pitched into the mattress. It does, admittedly, take a minute for Bones’s brain to catch up, but once it does…

He slides his fingers ever-so-gently up Jim’s sides, over the back of his ribs, taking great care to wiggle against the ridges of his shoulderblades. Jim jumps, turning to admonish him, but Bones is back to the charade. He works his thumbs into Jim’s shoulders, then squeezes--just above the collarbone. 

“Well h-he’s a lucky guy--holy shit--”

Jim shrieks, high-pitched and frantic, and totters off into a flustered flurry of giggles. Bones has never in his life heard him make such a sound, not even when drunk. 

“What--”

“Bones--” Jim flips over and levels a threatening finger.

“--was that?” Bones smothers his laugh in his fist, but it bursts free when Jim’s face flushes adorably pink.

“You surprised me.” Jim crosses his arms and pulls a face. Bones raises an eyebrow. 

“I surprised--c’mere.” Bones starts tickling him in earnest now, nipping fingers chasing each sensitive spot he’s come to learn over the years. Jim dissolves in his hands, giggles quickly graduating to full-on laughter. 

“B-Bohohones!” Jim shoves lightly at his shoulders as he laughs, bright and bubbly. Bones uses the opportunity to slip his hands up to Jim’s collarbone again, giving another squeeze into the muscle just above. Jim flails, his knees slamming into Bones’s back--ow--and and descends promptly into a highly-entertaining octave of desperate laughter.

“How on earth are you this ticklish and alive?” Bones muses, skittering his fingers back to Jim’s stomach for something of a break. Eventually, he just pats Jim’s stomach and swings off of him. 

“I’m never letting you forget about this. Every time you’re being annoying I hope you think of my hand right here,” Bones grins, resting his hand on the spot. He tries not to read too much into the clear giddiness on Jim’s face. 

“Oh, you bastard,” Jim gasps, eyes positively sparkling. “I’m going to get you back for that.”

Yet, Jim does nothing but flop back against the bed. The extra high bounce shakes a few stray giggles loose. 

“I’m sure you will.” Bones pats Jim’s head. Jim shakes him off, grumbling under his breath. Bones snorts, squeezes Jim’s shoulder, and trods off towards the bathroom, ignoring the indignant screech behind him.

…

Bones wakes up warm, beautifully so. Jim’s arms wind around his torso and keep him close, strong and secure. Some soft and content part of him wants to lean back into it. He’ll never get tired of waking up like this. 

Bones turns slowly so he can see Jim’s face. He looks so different asleep. Younger, maybe. 

Bones allows himself another thirty minutes of drifting sleep, letting Jim’s gentle snores guide them into the late morning. The room chimes a soft tone around ten or so, warning them of their impending loss of breakfast privileges. He has half a mind to ignore it, but he doesn’t really know what they eat on this planet. Jim can be picky as hell when he puts his mind to it, and they’re both useless when they’re hangry. 

Bones starts breaking Jim’s hold, maneuvering him gently. The sleepy whining is par for the course, but the fingers worming into his sides? That’s certainly new.

“J-Jihim.” Bones clears his throat. “Let go, ya sleepy lug.”

Jim makes a soft noise and cuddles closer, decidedly not following instructions. Bones keeps tugging, but the more he pulls, the more Jim decides to tickle. Jim finds a spot on his stomach that makes Bones choke back a squeal, shaking both of them with unreleased laughter. 

“Damn pehest. Two can play at that game.” Bones huffs. He starts poking at his ribs, still gentle, as he wiggles closer to the edge of the bed. Jim smiles and starts chuckling, his hold loosening. Bones worms his torso out of the octopus grip and starts slowly untangling their legs. He gets about halfway there before Jim grabs his leg and starts reeling him back in. 

“Jim--”

Jim smirks and opens his eyes. Oh. Oh no. 

“Gotcha!” Jim cackles, pinching at Bones’s thigh with reckless abandon. Bones screeches, his voice cracking hopelessly. Jim flops on top of him and starts tickling wherever he can reach, taking extra care to revisit his stomach. 

“Y-You absolute—“

Thump. 

Bones’s back collides with the plush carpet, along with a few throw pillows. Jim catches himself at the last minute with a yelp.

“Are you okay?” Jim laughs and peers at him over the edge of the bed. He offers a hand to help Bones up. 

“I hate you.” Bones glares up at him. His lips twitch as he tries to resist the smile that’s already consumed him. He swats Jim’s offered hand away, then smacks him with a pillow for good measure. He goes to get ready for the day--someone has to be the adult here--but Jim grabs him by the waist and pulls him back into bed. 

“I love you too.” Jim gazes down at him with an unbearably goofy smile. Bones rolls his eyes, but his face is warm, so embarrassingly warm. Bones goes to get up, Jim shoves his hands under Bones’s arms, and round two sufficiently costs them any hope of breakfast. 

[bentosandbox]

hoshi headcannons GIMMIE [pwease im starving]

woah how did you know i had some (more) bubbling in my head recently after reading the mh collab (not that she appears in it :( but…yato does) also perfect timing since hoshi module Y is about to drop just dropped on EN

read it NOW!!!!

ok so . shes basically like an old salaryman to me just look at that bow (salute emoji) and with all the salarymen traits that come with that like terrible work life balance(well they are all office workers so. all have this but shes like, THE salaryman you know) nomikai addict (kind of real) and a super yes-man except..nobody dares to even make her do something she wouldn't do herself, and not out of fear(well maybe a little for some) but out of respect (probably saved every officer at least once), and being a senior (since she's been with the lgd since day 0) she could technically treat people like they're beneath her (true) but instead she goes super formal-mode the gapmoe(?) is so endearing its like . suddenly thought of the mc from vinland saga whos like ^_^ im so harmless i wont harm anyone (havent not caught up with it for very long though idk if it's still like that)

she likes to (Module X spoilers I guess) idk roleplay being a pushover??? in that story she tl;dr comes to the rescue of a colleague who is like 'ty oni-sis but you should just leave me here 🥹 and she's like (tanks like a champ getting her ID card cracked in the process module.jpg) and goes 'haha sorry that request is a bit too hard why not i uhh help you apply for a bonus instead' it was here i was like ok hoshichen (in that order) is dead to me she would never yaoitop chen !!!!!!!!!!!!!! basically could be left.jpg but is right.png most of the time

she's old… but how old?? I guess touhou type of old…? the other two are like kids to her at times, maybe sometimes she does an old man act to get them to stop quarrelling like sitting at the window and with a coffee and reading something and telling them 'ok im just going to sit here until you two sort it out ok take your time' (they instantly stop)

her and chen: i think i mentioned this somewhere before but chen = wuxia protag hoshi = her mentor (in some capacities since technically wei was her [absent] mentor) she has all the qualities you would want except like in standard mentor fashion, a little conservative (i really do like this…flaw? because to be content with how the LGD operates, it makes you wonder how things were like before…)

her and swire… i like to think sometimes swire brings That Day up and hoshi is just ^_^ i see! and then after chen is gone maybe swire has some difficulty cleaning up the mess and at times takes out the badge to have a 'what would mysterious officer x do' moment and one time hoshi catches her doing that and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh omg forgot what i wanted to write here

her and lin: man…………….they didn't seem that hot in ch7 but man the potential interactions of an ex-underworld lackey and current underworld heir where is my food hg where are the ingredients i will cook the food myself but i need the ingredients to start with that one interaction was not enough

(quick spoiler warning for monhun collab) basically only the el gatos and rathalos got isekaid so the village is all higashinese and not like a MH village so you get sprinkles of higashi lore

i bring monhun collab up because yato and noir used to be an assassins but they quit da life and yato mentions 'killing your own kind', talks about her last hit she flaked out on but that that another assassin simply killed the mother and daughter duo she was supposed to kill so i was like damn what if hoshiguma also…?? (they are all oni and we all know she's ex-yakuza) or what if… she was the one that had to do yato's job, the hoshi/yato yaoi would be UNREAL but i dont think HG has the guts

also she and yato are ace because uhhhhhh i said so my rhodes my rules no joke i had wanted to do a hoshiguma dating sim for this year's april fools (with a bunch of other ops too but she would be the 'main' route even though there's no 'good' end) but then uhhh time issue anyway don't forget to set the LGD trio's voices to cantonese

[gennabi]

Hiiii i didnt know wether ur request r open or not, if its not them im sorry and you can ignore this request. Can i request dating headcannons for Opera-san from Mairimashita!Iruma-kun? If you dont want to then its ok, you can ignore this request!

luv ur works! <3 remember to stay hydrated and eat 3 meals a day!

it's actually closed but this made my day, giggling just thinking abt it heh so here ya go 😚 awww thank you so much for loving them!! im honoured 😭🙆‍♂️ i will!! you too anon, please stay healthy n take care of urself <33

dating headcanons

opera x reader (no prns) • 0.6k

romantic; fluff

[ self explanatory title , opera's a little soft bcs yes , cw cussing ]

m!ik masterlist | main masterlist

─does that thing where they would ask for the time you wake up and sleep just so they could text you good morning and good night 🥺

─opera's love language is acts of service bcs i say so

─they love to spoil you!!!

─from letting you sleep in for five more minutes to smtg like

─bathing you and washing your hair themselves when you come home tired, wordlessly massaging your shoulders as you doze off in the bathtub

─also a little mean teasing shit. the funny (or lowkey scary) thing is opera teases with a straight face. straight up spitting lies as if they're facts. if you're oblivious, goodluck figuring out if they're actually being serious or just teasing.

─"y/n, i've heard a rumour that if you don't kiss a certain red-haired butler, iruma is going to hate you and won't talk to you ever again."

"that's not true, he would never do such a thing─"

"you're saying i'm lying when i literally spend day and night in the same castle with him? wow, y/n, i expected better from you."

─they did get their kiss in the end so it all works out i guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

─also the type to play around with hair if you have them. you'll do cute and weird hairstyles on each other during sleepovers awww omg imagine opera w the cat ears hairstyle hfffffjjf

─speaking of sleepovers, would definitely be into face masks n shit but only views them as a "privilege/sleepover thing" if that makes sense

─mostly the big spoon but that's because they like to come in bed later than you, checking buttler stuffs for next morning yk, but if they're having an off day tomorrow, would definitely ask to be the little spoon and your heart just squeezes when their ears do that happy flap 🥺😭😭

─your dates are either staying in or some low-tension stuffs like picnics or having a walk through the streets at night kind of thing, they just like to hang around with you and listen to you talk and ramble :') <33

─loves it when you give them a headpat, like one where you do to actual cats

─they just grab your hand n brings it to their head and you ruffle. the first time iruma and sullivan saw it, they dropped their knees to the ground bcs OPERA PURRED??@$$?&

─when you're having a bad day, opera's ears are down all day :( they feel so bad when you feel bad, what's this. their sweetheart not feeling good? oh no :(

─go to extreme lengths to make you feel better (as u fucking deserve yeah!)

─mf bought a new comforter just so you can lie down comfortably in bed bless sullivan's debit card amen 🙏

─doesn't let you move at all like you wanna go to the kitchen? no need to worry. opera will bring the kitchen to you instead 🫡 *not sure if it'll show but its supposed to be the salute emoji

─spoon feeds you :( <3 and yk the thg they do when they sing a lullaby and pat iruma's body to sleep? yeah, they do that shit too. except they're lying beside you because what if a certain bald demon decides to disturb you in your sleep by being loud? no way they're letting that happen🤕

─also LOVES giving you nicknames 💔💔💔 more so the slightly corny ones lmao

─the thing is they do it so smoothly and with their blank signature face even you didn't notice it the first time.

─"do you prefer something light or heavy for tomorrow’s breakfast, lovebug?"

"_ would be nice─ wait what"

─opera's fav place to kiss is your fingers sighs just imagine you talking to them as they play with your fingers and hum as they give each a delicate peck. also has a habit of kissing the inside of ur hands when u cup their cheeks WAHHH 😭😭💗

okay that's it im going to stop here before i go insane and cry more bcs opera's not real </3

[forgwater]

There is evil, and then there is cursed emoji pillow

Sam's Shop where everything is in stock

part 2 - Sam and Divus

part 1

Warning: cursed emoji pillow crackfic

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It was a normal day in the Mystery Shop. Students came to buy 5 things and left carrying 15 instead.

All was well... until...

Sam's shadowy friends all pile in one of the storage rooms.

Weird.

They're usually out and about gathering intel for Sam. There is a disturbance happening.

Suspicion filled his thoughts and as the man turns around he comes face to face with a horrific plastic mask in the form of what he assumes to be a frog...

...what's going on here....?

"Hello, Sam!" the figure salutes cheerily.

"Hello... I can't say I remember meeting you before..." he tries to sound as casual as possible even though some rando just appeared into his shop in a puff of smoke and his friends don't seem too fond of their presence.

Ah, well... Sam's used to dealing with cursed customers. So what's one more curse being added to the mix?!

"Ah, no, we haven't met before." the stranger explains.

That's good. He didn't want to offend this... apparition by not remembering meeting them. That would've been bad for business.

"Then what can I help you with?!" Sam offers enthusiastically.

"I-" but the figure gets interrupted by a hand on their shoulder. They look behind them to see none other than Divus Crewel.

"And what do you think you're wearing?" he inquires, a frown evident on his features.

"My blob of darkness, mushroom hat and frog mask?" the stranger answers uncertainly. "If you don't like this, you're definitely going to hate the uniforms..." the mutter.

"Speak clearly." Crewel demands.

"Now, Divus, don't go scaring my... uh... customer." Sam interjects.

"There is no need to fight." the stranger tries "I have been sent by... you know what? That doesn't matter. I'm here as divine intervention." they declare.

Sam and Divus share a look. Both of them thinking 'Is this person mad?' But the stranger continues.

"I am here to help the students of the prestigious Night Raven Collage cooperate." they clarify.

"That cheeks out." Sam says.

"Good luck. You're going to need it to train these boys." Divus adds.

"Worry not for I have Him." and with that the figure produces the Almighty Cursed Emoji Pillow form behind them. "Fear not! for He is here!"

"Put that thing back where it came from or I'll burn it." Crewel demands.

"So this is why my friends acted like that, huh? The end is near after all... the cursed tarot cards were right all along." Sam adds.

And with that the figure disappears again.

"They better not come back." Divus warns to no one in particular.

"That pillow... it truly is evil." Sam explains.

-the very next day-

A blob of darkness manifests in the Mystery Shop yet again.

"Sam, I need all your empty cardboard boxes." they announce.

"You can have them as long as you don't bring that pillow here ever again." the shopkeeper says.

"Deal."

Let's just hope the NRC is ready to receive the blessings of the cursed emoji pillow.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(if you want to be tagged, you need only ask, also please specify what characters you are interested in reading about or if you want to be tagged in all works)

taglist: @wildnya @bunnwich @sammo-writes-whatever @theonemarvelousness @kalu-luwa @b0nkers-papaya

[hivequest]

Taking a Risk » Mallek Adalov/Reader

Wordcount: 2.3k words

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, stressed out reader, chillboy Mallek. TYping quirk only used when texting cause I could not be bothered lmao Originally posted on AO3

A/N: One of my favorite things that I’ve written, ever. I love Mallek and he’s for sure one of my favorite Friendsim characters. When I wrote this I was really feeling those Quarantine Woes

You didn't know what you were doing here. You felt out of place in the worst possible ways. It was a weird, squidgy feeling like stepping on wet grass. But not like the fun kind where you were running around in a sprinkler on a hot-as-balls summer day. No, this was the bad kind of wet grass that you stepped on without knowing it was wet. Why weren't you wearing shoes?

This analogy is stupid. The point is, you're feeling bummed out.

And what better way to not have to deal with that than hang out with someone you knew wouldn't push you into talking about all the ways crashing on this planet sucked! The point is, you're on your way to see Mallek. Mallek is absolutely the kind of friend who can tell when you just need to sit down and veg out. You had been so caught up in everyone else's bullshit that you weren't looking after your own damn self. So now you were doing that.

All it took was a quick text, asking Mallek if he had any company. He texted back only a moment later with a no, obviously not. You asked him if he wanted any. Not really. You ask him if you can come over anyway. Obviously.

You smiled at the palmhusk in your, well, palm. You could already feel the chill vibes of your hacker friend. Friend? Was that the right word for it? You didn't know anymore. When you first met there were definitely some sparks there. You could still feel them now and it made weird butterflies flutter around in your stomach. When you slapped his phone out of his hand and he sent you ass over applecart into the slimy depths of sewer water and he saved you, tits out and all.

You shook off the weird wistful feeling of maybe possibly crossing the friendship barrier and told him you'd walk to his hive. You'd been moping in some bookhive, not your usual hang-out spot with Tagora or Tyzias. This was some upper caste bookhive with purple bloods and some indigos and definitely not where you were welcome if the looks you were getting were any indication. They ranged from snooty to downright murderous. Yeesh.

Your phone -palmhusk, stupid troll names- beeped again. You got another text from him and those cheery fucking butterflies were back. God, you had it bad.

yeah were not doing that lmao;

im not going to let my robobuddy walk out in the sun

do you even know what time of day it =

just stay put ive already got your location ill pick you up;

And like a good little friendsimp. You park your ass on a chair and wait. You hadn't released your moping had taken up most of the night. But with the quick look around, yeah, no, this place was nearly empty by now. Just some older bluebloods trying to cram before their Ordeals and get shipped off-planet. Again: Yeesh.

You kept your ears open for the telltale sound of Mallek's limo. It was a sound you were getting used to these days. He always seemed ready to drop whatever coding shit he was working on to come to see you. You tried not to think too hard on what that might mean. No need to get your hopes up now. It's probably just your bad mood making you imagine some context where there's nothing. Yeah.

Damn, that shit hurted.

Just as you were about to add that to the reasons you were considering just screaming your lungs out who cares whose listening? you heard the wonderfully familiar sound of an approaching elongated scuttlebuggy. If that wasn't enough of a clue as to who the ride was for the quiet of the bookhive was very abruptly disturbed by a series of rhythmic beeps.

Holy shit was that the Tetris theme?

You shoved your palmhusk into your hoodie pocket and yanked the hood over your head. Even if the sun was only out a little bit you didn't want it anywhere near your freshly healed skin. You had no kind cowgirl to nurse you back to health right now if you got your asscheeks baked by the flaming death orb. You peeked your head out and even with the blinding light of Alternia's suns you could Mallek had opened the door and was waiting for you.

Aw. No, shit. You're in a bad mood don't get all heart eyes at him. Don't make it weird.

You took a few steps back into the bookhive, ready to make a run for it. You turn to a sitting indigoblood, who is just staring at you disdainfully for keeping the door open. You give her a two-fingered salute. Godspeed young cosmonaut. She gives you a one-fingered salute. Close the door you insufferable bulgebiter. Fair.

Taking a running start, you book it out into the heat of the Alternian sun and dive for the open car door. It's then that you realize he's halfway parked on the sidewalk to lessen the amount of time you'd have to spend in the sun. Aw. That also means that you came barreling like a cannonball at something that was like two feet out of the door. FUck.

Your face meets carpet and you can already feel the rugburn starting to set in. You hear a startled wheezy laugh from above you, a sound you know better than anyone else on this planet. You smile. It's not like you had any dignity to begin with.

You say hello to him as you peel yourself off of the floor of his car.

"Hey, there robobuddy. You stuck the landing this time," He smiles down at you as he reaches over you to shut the door, closing the space out from natural light and leaving you both lit by his colorful LEDs. You shrug and tell him you've been getting a lot of practice landing on your face these days. The look he gives you is still smiling but there's some level of disbelief at the dumbassery that is your whole existence.

"I know you can get yourself into it. Nothing too bad this time, though, right? No drones or broken bones?" He sounds concerned which is nice but he doesn't drown you with his concern. He leans back on the bench of his limo, keeping an eye on you as the vehicle begins to move on its own. You've been staying out of big messes but the little messes are starting to mess with you. He makes a sound of understanding the sounds as it comes from deep in his chest. Whoa. "Believe me, I've been there. Glad you're not cracking under it though."

He smiles and you can see his little fang and you can feel your heart melt a little. And also you're getting a bit teary-eyed and now Mallek looks alarmed. Shit. You try to quickly explain that you're fine, just, alien allergies am I right? He must be using some new air freshener to mask the musty smell of his limo. Since doesn't use it enough. Ha ha?

He isn't buying it.

With a rare show of cerulean prowess, he lifts you up off of the shitty car rug and sets you on the seat beside him. He feels uncomfortable and you can tell. Ah, goddammit you made it weird. You didn't mean to. Fuck. Fuck now you're feeling even worse. You thought you were starting to balance out. You're with Mallek now, shouldn't everything start to quiet down like it always does? Fuck. He doesn't say anything at first, just leans back against the seat and stretches his arms across it, letting you lean on him if you choose to.

...You choose to.

Your head finds itself somewhere between his shoulder and his collarbone, and you just. Shove your face there. Then scream.

To his credit, Mallek doesn't even flinch. He doesn't wince or shy away from you as you let out every bit of anger, sadness, and frustration out against his sweater. He just sits quietly, staring straight at the blacked-out windshield. You get the feeling he's needed to do this more than once.

Screw this planet. Screw everything about it that makes all of your friends suffer. Why can't you just get them away from all this bullshit?! Why do you have to deal with everyone's bullshit! You love them, you do but holy fuck they're looking to you like you can undo all the damage this place has done to them when you've got literally no god damn idea what's happening at any point ever!

And then, just like that, it fades into the background. Your throat hurts. Your head hurts and you think you might be crying. But it feels lighter. Better now that you've gotten some of that aggression out. You aren't like the trolls on Alternia. You can't kill people when you experience an Emotion™. But that doesn't mean you don't get pent up with rage.

Mallek realizes that now. He lets out a breath he didn't realize he was holding and his left hand slowly moves down from the back of the seat the rest against your back. His thumb brushes against your back, the claw drawing little patterns against the fabric of your sweater. His sweater. He tries not to think his sign your chest. This isn't the time.

"Feeling any better?" He asks and you don't know how to answer. You kinda don't want to. But you nod anyways, and you feel some tension leave his body. You knew he was worried about you. You apologize for making him witness your meltdown but he just makes another deep-chested hum. "Nothing to apologize for. I got the feeling you weren't feeling great. I could tell from the texts, you didn't use nearly enough ugly emojis."

You scoff and smack a hand against his chest and once again you hear that wonderful laugh from him. Hey! Your purrbeast emojis are adorable, thank you very much! And you'll not hear another word of it or else you'll send him pictures of rocks and rocks exclusively. No more memes.

"Jokes on you I'm into that shit." You laugh and thump your head against his collarbone. You thank him for being with you when were needed it. And picking you up to make sure you didn't deal with it alone. You don't want to make it weird but...yeah.

He doesn't respond this time, just letting you both enjoy the silence and the comforting sound of the engine. You should almost be at Mallek's apartment by now. It's as you're settling in for the last bit of the drive that you notice that the limo isn't moving. And hasn't been for a while. Your head pops up in confusion and the little GPS display on the back of one of the seats says... yep.

You're already at Mallek's.

But then why is the engine still on? That can't be good for the environment. Do these things even run on gas or is it bugs? Bug gas? Gross.

You notice then that the rumbling is coming from behind you. Like. From where Mallek is sitting. He doesn't look away when you turn to him, just kind of tilting his head to the side with a little bit of a cerulean hue to his cheeks. Oh. Oh, the sound is coming from him. He's purring. That's.

That's adorable.

You feel yourself soften even more when he lifts his arms, silently offering a hug if you want it. Is this platonic? Is this more? You've never had too much trouble identifying what people wanted from you. (Debatable.) If was overtly flushed you could shut it down or divert it to something very much friends only. (Like your every exchange with Zebruh.) But did you even want to do that to your hackerman? You could feel yourself screaming, no, absolutely not. But at the same time, you didn't want things to change. You didn't want to make his issues any worse than they already were. He didn't have too much longer on the planet and you knew it would tear him apart.

But then he turned those blue eyes to you. He looked just as unsure as you were but he was willing to take the risk. He shoved himself so far out of his comfort zone for you and was asking you to be selfish. To want something for yourself and do something for yourself. Not put him or anyone else's wants first. Just your own. And so you did.

You crawled up into his lap, pressed yourself as close to him as you could and clung to him. His arms didn't hesitate to wrap around you and you could feel a shuddering breath from above you.

"We don't have to put a label on this... not yet. Or ever. Either way is chill with me. I just... yeah." He gave up with a little shrug of his shoulders but you knew what he meant. Unless you could find a way to fight fate he was going to go off-world. He was going to leave you and you doubted you'd be able to go with him. You'd probably get gored by a drone for even trying.

But even if it was just for now, just for a moment, you were going to take it. You were going to let yourself have something, have someone who would care for you no matter how long or short your time was. You'd take it. You had stomached some of the most horrible things on this planet but Mallek had always been a constant. And you got the feeling he thought the same way about you.

So, you'd take it. Whatever comes next, you'd take it. You listened to the sound of his purring, in no hurry to move to get inside the apartment. Mallek felt the same.

You exhaled.

You would be okay.

[bribe-the-door]

Don’t Blame the Drunk Calling [1]

the one where you’re harry’s roommate and you both have messy dating lives

a/n: hello sweetest babes!!! it’s han -- i know i haven’t been writing much fo anything for ... like a year now? but we’re BACK! we are back and kicking!!! this is the beginning of something i’d like to continue so ... stay tuned :) ily! <3

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“What are you smiling about?” you asked, sarcasm lingering in the tone of your voice.

Harry sat opposite of you, legs curled up under himself. His face glowed from both the light of his phone screen and the words being sent his way. Watching his lips twitch into a smile made your own stomach churn.

He remained quiet as he typed; the clicks of his keyboard and the whoosh! of a sent text served as a response to your question.

“Well?” you pressed.

Your second attempt hung in the air between you two. He chuckled under his breath and continued to scroll through his phone, probably looking for an emoji of somesort.

“Hm?” Harry’s eyes never left his phone.

You sighed, voice quiet. “Nevermind.”

He looked up at the change in cadence, shaking his head as if to refocus himself. His phone was then turned over on its face, a silent promise of ‘I’m listening’.

“What is it?”

It was your turn to bite at your lip now, except this wasn’t in a flirty way. Or a smirking way. There was nothing cute about the jealousy you so fervently tried to hide on a daily basis, living with the boy who stole your heart last summer.

And then promptly stomped it into the ground.

“Y/n,” he interrupted your self-spiral. “What?”

You shrugged it off as if you hadn’t been the one to press in the first place. “I don’t know, it’s just my job as your best friend to pester you about the new girl in your life.”

Harry’s eyes widened, a nervous laugh following in suit. “The new what?”

“Isn’t that why you’re smirking at your phone?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know.”

You narrowed your eyes in his direction, wishing for laser-vision or something of the like.

He pursed his lips, pondering. “Her name’s Elise, not that you’d care to know.”

Elise.

The pounding of your heart sped up and simultaneously grew quiet as it fell into your stomach.

She wasn’t the first, after the both of you… you know.

There was Brie, Anna, the girl you only saw once because she snuck out in the middle of the night, then Sage, most recently Elisabeth.

And now Elise.

“Y/n?” He asked again.

“What?”

He paused, holding onto your gaze for mere seconds too long. “Are you jealous?”

“Why would I be jealous? Of a girl I haven’t met? That you’ll probably bring here for a few dates and then hook up?” The words steamrolled from your lips. “Not everything is about sex, you know.”

Harry bit back a laugh, shaking his head.

“What?”

“Sounds exactly like someone who needs to get laid would say.”

Your mouth fell open with a spread of embarrassment across your cheeks. “What the hell--!”

Harry stood quickly, throwing another taunting smirk in your direction. “I’ll leave you with that to ponder. I, on the other hand, have a date.”

You muttered a string of curse words under your breath, bidding him farewell and silently hoping he’d stub his toe on the way out.

“We’ll try to be quiet tonight, you know, when I’m getting laid.”

“Oh fuck off!” A throw pillow was, accurately named, and launched in his direction. His laughter could be heard even once he was down the hall to his room.

Maybe he was right.

*** It had been a while since… you know. It had happened. And you wished that period of absence was lesser than, but given the way things were working these days, it wasn’t something to depend on. Your own relationship with hookups and casual dating wasn’t anything to boast aboutーthey were few and far between (when they did happen).

You preferred to keep to yourself; nights spent alone with a good show and a glass of wine far more filled your fancy than any night with a stranger, but lately, you’d been feeling rather lonely. Like you wanted to be needed.

Desired.

Even if just for a moment (or hour, or so).

Harry had long since left the living room and you sat in silence, pondering. The buzz of an earlier glass of wine lingered in your head and only encouraged your decision to open the dreaded app on your phone.

Your profile, carefully curated with pictures of you laughing with friends, moody mirror selfies, and a screenshot of a fuckboy’s attempt to slide in your DMs (as a warning of what not to do), sat vacant for a few months now. There were a few unread messages in your inbox and you deleted them all. It was time to start over.

All to prove Harry wrong.

Swiping like it was a video game, you matched and matched and super-liked anyone to your liking. Bryan, Timothy, a few Chrises, some guy named “T”, they all piled up somewhere on the internet as your next potential fling. It only took a few minutes on this dull Saturday night for Chris #3 to message you.

“Hey cutie” was all that you earned from your search, and you played along, wine helping your case.

Chris didn’t keep your attention long, though, and you continued swiping out of boredom. It was then that you swiped to Aly’s profile.

It was a curious feeling, the way your heart rushed to a rapid beat in your chest. Pausing, you studied over her face in the first picture. Then the second. And the third, fourth, and fifth, too.

How did…

You tapped to the settings of your Tinder app, confused. Indeed, it was set to “Everyone”. When this happened, you were unsure. Maybe Harry had gotten a hold of your phone one Wine Wednesday and changed it as a prank. (Not that it really was a prank…).

You peered over your phone sheepishly, as if you were expecting Harry to jump out from behind the couch and cause a scene. Like you were somehow 13 again, hiding from your parents and reading Seventeen magazine. A slow burn flourished over your cheeks, ignited by the juvenile sparks in your chest.

You pressed the settings button again, biting your lip as you did so. It wasn’t as ceremonious as you were making it out to be, but your body had other plans.

Women only.

The checkmark sealed the deal, and that was that.

A new kind of rush filled your ribcage, holding back the beating of your heart that very likely could be heard from across the room. You swiped back to the main screen, Aly’s profile still front and center. Carefully hovering over the picture of her face, you paused before swiping right.

To your surprise, it highlighted in blue and showed your pictures together.

“Matched!” it said in a celebratory font.

Your phone hung in your hand absent-mindedly as you sat, sinking further into the couch. Does this mean something? You wondered. Am Iー?

Before you could answer, your phone vibrated in your hand.

A single “1” shone like a beacon over the Messages tab in the app. Something told you it wasn’t Chris #3 trying to redeem himself from earlier.

Aly’s name was illuminated at the top of your screen, her profile picture shrunk down to fit the small space but her smile was still just as friendly. Your heart picked up in its cadence, thudding prominently in your chest.

It’s just a girl, y/n, you thought to yourself. It’s just a girl, on a dating app, that I matched with.

Aly: Hi :)

Okay, simple. Concise. Not a lot to work with but certainly not a lot to get worked up over, either. Your fingers danced over the screen, going back and forth between the “Hey” with a smiley or a “What’s up?” and a wink. Was a wink too forward? What if you responded with the same thing she sent. Would she think you’re an amateur? That you don’t know how to talk to girls?

Aly: Are you from around here? Your third picture is from the Firefly, right?

You paused again, rethinking everything.

You: Hey! I am, the Firefly is my go-to. You?

Send.

It was almost instantly Aly sent a response, excited someone else was familiar with her favorite spot, too.

Had you ever crossed paths?

The conversation flowed between the two of you seamlessly, your anxiety fading away as Aly provided most of the questions and seemed eager to talk. Before you knew it, an hour had gone by and you’d ignored a few other texts to talk to this random stranger.

Harry had sent a few, one was the link to a tiktok, one of those “the person who sent you this…” (it was about food; how typical) and a text reminding you he’d be bringing Elise home tonight. He made sure to remind you that he ‘apologized in advance for the noise’ and that he’d ‘make it up to you’.

Aly sent another message, the banner across the top of your screen pulling your attention from Harry’s attempt at pushing your buttons.

Aly: You down to get drinks sometime?

The butterflies started their rampage in your belly all over again, this time much more intensely than the last.

She wanted to get drinks? Already?

You weighed your options: one; drinks with a hot girl at Firefly or two; get wine and bring it back to your apartment while Harry had this Elise girl over.

There was nothing to lose with your offer, so you swiftly typed out a suggestion and hit send without second thought.

You: Wanna come to mine and drink some wine? I just baked banana bread :)

Her response was immediate, a quality you quite admired about Aly: she was bold and brave, exactly the opposite of yourself.

Aly: Red or white? ;)

***

The moments before Aly was slated to arrive were the longest of your life. If you’d thought your heart was beating quickly before, this was overdrive. You shared your address, along with the promise of baked goods, and waited.

A soft knock at your door sent your feet flying to the entryway. You brushed the hair from your forehead and fidgeted with the buttons on your flannel, and with one more deep breath, you unlocked the deadbolt.

Aly was shorter than you, only by a few inches, but her bold eyes drew you right in. She smiled, sly and curious, offering the black plastic bag of wine before greeting you.

“Hi.”

Her salutation hung in the air between you as you took her in. She was just like her pictures and she drew you in all the same as she had on Tinder.

“Hey,” you answered, taking the bag from her outstretched hand. “Come in?”

You stepped back to allow her to shuffle past you, her coat already coming off before the door shut behind the two of you.

“This is cozy,” she said. “Just you?”

“No, I have a roommate. He’s bringing someone home tonight, supposedly.”

She chuckled, “Interesting living with a guy, huh?”

“Yeah, you could say that.”

You took her coat and tossed it over a dining table chair. Aly had already made herself at home on the couch, opposite of the corner you normally staked out as your own. She continued to look around, biting back a smile every so often.

The string lights around the crown molding illuminated her face with a soft orange glow as she took everything in. She tossed her phone aside, arms outstretched across the sofa behind her. Her smile was everything, and you almost forgot why she was even here.

“Do you, uh, want me to open this?” You nodded toward the bag in your hand, its weight bringing you back into the moment.

Aly nodded, “Want me to come with?”

“Sure.”

She pushed off of the couch to follow you into the small kitchen, finding a spot in front of the sink. It was comfortable having her here, the way she just ‘fit’ in without even trying. Like it wasn’t new territory for her.

Her arms were folded in front of her chest and she watched you intently.

Aly had bought both red and white, taking your answer of “depends on the day” a bit literally.

“So…,” she started, stepping in closer. “What’s your story?”

“Hm?”

“You know,” Aly laughed, “Why’re you on Tinder?”

Luckily you were searching through the silverware drawer when she asked, intent set on finding the corkscrew. “Just a 24-year-old thing to do, isn’t it?”

“Not really.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” you sighed, turning to face her. “My roommate and I have a bit of a bet going.”

Aly raised an eyebrow, asking you to continue. You found the corkscrew and shut to the drawer with your hip, shyly turning back toward the counter with the wine to divert the attention from yourself.

“It’s stupid. He’s … he’s a bit of a player.”

“Okay, and?”

So she wasn’t going to let this go. “He brings a lot of girls home, and I don’t bring many guys home.”

The bottle of red popped! open and you set the corkscrew aside. You felt Aly step in closer behind you, offering a glass from the counter.

“I’m not a guy, though.”

“Yeah,” you laughed, feeling the warmth returning to your cheeks. Your tone shifts, voice getting quieter. “You’re not.”

“So what does that mean?”

You hand her a glass, generously full of the deep red alcohol, and shrug. “I’m not sure. What does that mean?”

She cocks her head to the side and smirks again. You’re painfully aware of how she licks her lips before speaking, and watched intently as she took a sip of the wine.

“Do you want it to mean something?”

“Well I mean,” you stammer over your words, “If you want it to mean something?”

Aly stepped toward you, closing in on the space between the lot of you. Her glass is raised, she nods in your direction, and you tap your glass to hers. You both take another sip and she waits to respond.

“I think it would be fun, you know. For it to mean something,” she shrugged. “I mean, isn’t that why you invited me over?”

Your eyes grew wide and you laughed nervously. “I didn’t think it would actually work.”

“Wouldn’t work? Oh, baby,” Aly shook her head, “I knew from the moment I saw your picture that I wasn’t going to just let you go.”

Baby. Your head swirled with thoughts, overwhelmed to say the least. “Sorry, I, uh,” you giggled to yourself again, flustered. The sip you intended to take was more of a gulp, and then another.

Aly joined your laughter, touching your shoulder in efforts to console you. “Was that too forward of me? I’m sorry, I forget that this is new for some people.”

“How’d you know?”

“You’ve been picking at your nails since the moment I got here and talking at the speed of light,” Aly leaned back against the sink. “You’re an open book, y/n.”

She took a long drink from her glass, now half empty, and stood silently.

“An open book, hm?”

“Yep. Totally.”

You paused for a second, the wine in-hand going down much faster than you anticipated. “What else do you know about me then?”

Aly’s eyes widened, a smile creeping up on her face. “Let me see.”

It was your turn to lean back against the counter and wait for what she had to say. Her eyes sized you up and down, and she hummed a “hmm…” just for good measure.

“Shy. But only when you don’t know her well. Confident, but that’s mostly with the help of wine. This roommate? You like him, at least a little. But you’re on Tinder… matching with women? Interesting character development in my book at least.”

You shook your head, embarrassed at the impressive correctness that she boasted in her assumptions. “Mostly right.”

“Only mostly?”

“Yeah,” you hid behind another sip of wine, “You forgot about the part where I’m really into you.”

“Oh,” Aly reached behind her to place the now-empty glass on the counter, stepping closer to you once more. “You’re really into me?”

You nodded.

She took another step in. “How much?” Her voice was nearly a whisper.

You could hardly hear her, over the hammering of your heart, but your brain was busy working up a witty response.

“How much, baby?” Aly pressed.

She was dangerously close to you now, only inches from your face. The mention of you being ‘confident’ but ‘mostly with the help of wine’ was no truer than in this moment, and you didn’t answer her with words. But instead, a kiss.

Aly didn’t hesitate to kiss back, hardly leaving you the time to place your wine glass (empty, too) on the counter. She leaned into you and wrapped her arms around your neck, pulling you closer. She knew exactly what she was doing.

It was just like kissing boys, you quickly realized, except this felt better. Aly led, moving her lips in synchrony with yours that, once you two found a balance that worked, made your head spin. The butterflies in your stomach morphed into something more; less about the nerves and more about the want.

You didn’t care about anything in this momentー

ーWhich was exactly when you heard the front door slam shut.

“Y/n!” Harry called out from the entryway. You heard his keys hit the table, along with another thud and the low murmurs of another voice.

Fuck fuck fuckfuckfuck.

“Y/n!” He called again, “Are you evenー?”

He rounded the corner as you pushed out from behind Aly’s grasp, her own surprise catching up with her.

“Oh my god,” you whispered, quickly changing directions to face Harry. “Hi, yes, I’m here.”

Harry eyed you, clearly seeing the person behind you. “Hi…”

“Um, Harry,” you paused, stepping aside to bring Aly into view. “This is Aly.”

Aly spoke up from behind you: “Yeah, I know.”

You turned on your heel. “What?”

Harry hadn’t said anything since seeing Aly and remained quiet in the doorway of the kitchen. He raked a hand through his curls and stared at the ground.

“Hi, Harry.” Aly said, her tone laced with awkwardness.

Oh.

He cleared his throat. “Hey, Aly.”

Oh, no.

“Do you…?”

“Yeah,” they both answered in unison.”

“...know each other.”

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part two coming soon!

[xpeachesncream]

off the grid | two

summary: it was as simple as swapping places with a stranger from across the world to get away from everything back home. that is - until you meet Jimin. things become more complicated as he unfolds a new chapter in your life that you were initially trying to avoid.

pairing: reader x pjm

genre: post-college au, christmas/holiday au | angst, fluff, smut (to come)

words: 3191

chapter warnings: cussing / mature language, definitely inaccurate depiction of transportation, events and whereabouts in South Korea since i only did my research thru the internet, jimin is cute as fuck for being such an angel

> series masterlist <

You tried sleeping in after Namjoon and Yoongi's call, but you couldn't fall back asleep no matter how exhausted your body still felt. Instead, you sat up in bed, scrolling through the pictures you took from your stroll in the nearby streets yesterday. You didn't get too far, yet you came back with so many small goodies already. You kept stopping by every shop on the street, and you ate such delicious food that you were contemplating on getting more today. But, you were also determined to travel a little bit further and start some real adventures for yourself.

You got yourself washed up and ready for the day. You did your usual of prepping a very light breakfast for yourself, just to give you enough fuel to kick off the morning. While doing so, surprisingly unsurprised, you were certain you heard Jimin's voice in the hallway. You stared at the door as you stood and ate some cereal on the kitchen island, waiting for his knock to come.

"Knock, knock." He says, following with two soft knocks. You walked over, bowl in hand, as you opened the door to see Jimin standing there with a huge smile on his face and another tupperware in hand. "I come bearing gifts?" He steps in as you shut the door behind him.

"Aw, thanks! More food?"

"Yup."

"Assuming your parents still don't know Yana isn't here?" You chuckled.

"Not at all." He scratched the back of his neck and laughed nervously. "But I'll deal with it later."

"Mm, you should probably deal with it before Christmas rolls around, sir."

"Yesma'am." He salutes you playfully. "Did you eat the stuff that I brought yesterday?"

"Sure did, for a night time snack." He chuckled as he placed the new tupperware in the fridge.

"Body still adjusting?"

"Pretty much." You say as you begin to wash your bowl.

"What's your plan today, Miss Y/N?" You softly chuckle as you wipe your hands down.

"Just roam around."

"Let me know if you need anything, or if you need anyone to show you around." He held out his hand, signaling for your phone so he can put his number in.

"I may just take you up on that offer."

"Good." He smiled. "Well, I'll catch you later? I'll leave you to your peace." You nod as you follow him to the door.

"Thanks again for the food."

"No problem. Eat up." He taps the door frame before shutting the door close. You look down at your phone and see Jimin's contact info still on the screen. Or should we say, "PRINCE CHARMING 🥵😍" since that's what he decided to name himself?? Let's not forget to peep the little tidbit he put in the notes: "My name is Jimin but you can call me tonight ;)" Who even uses the 'Notes' section under the contact's info?

His use of emojis and cheesy lines made you laugh to yourself, but you left it anyways. You were highly thinking about taking up his offer on having someone show you around, but you kept reminding yourself that the whole reason you came here was to do this solo. But, god, there's only so many things you can achieve as a solo newbie in a place like South Korea. Would it truly hurt to get some help or advice from someone?

On your way to the train station, you came across a lively farmer's market. The cold was biting at every inch of your body no matter how bundled you were, cheeks rosy and glowing. Being that the farmer's market was booming at this time, you figured checking out the station map could wait. Long aisles of stands with colorful fresh fruit and vegetables had you stopping almost every second to try samples. Fruit and veggies certainly tasted fresh, and it was a nice feeling on your tongue. None of that pesticide, wax-covered bullshit back home. There was music playing in the background, one being a street artist playing his violin in this cold. You threw some change into his case and continued down the aisle, where more vendors were selling their own art and home-made goods.

You spent quite some time here, as it seemed like the booths would never end. It eventually did, and it brought you right to the train station that would bring you to Myeongdong. Luckily, it was a simple, straightforward trip and you'd be on your way to more exploring. You planned to get some lunch first though because you can most definitely hear the street food calling your name.

As you continued down the street with your food in hand, you heard someone call you by name from behind.

"Y/N?" You turned your attention towards the street behind you to find Jimin pushing his way through the crowd with a huge smile on his face.

"Are you following me, Park Jimin?" You chuckled. He was wearing the same outfit you saw him in this morning, which was a thick sweater and leather jacket, dark grey jeans and boots. He had a hat on and some oversized glasses, which you thought fit his frame perfectly well.

"Definitely. Just had to make sure you knew what you were doing out here." He laughed. "Enjoying yourself?"

"Yeah, it's great. Do you come here often?"

"To be honest, not really. But the guys and I had nothing else to do today, plus-"He holds up a bag. "Ma put in a request for some stuff she was looking for since I was going to be here."

"That's sweet of you." You smiled toothlessly, watching as he beamed from ear to ear. Definitely a mama's boy, and a handsome one at that.

"Yeah, I do what I can." He shoved the bag down back to his side and tugged on his own shoulder bag. "Where are you headed after this?"

"Honestly? Wherever the wind brings me." You shrugged.

"You should tag along with me and my friends. We're uh, not doing anything fancy besides going to the comic cafe." He snorted nervously, hoping you wouldn't be one to label him as a dweeb this early on. "It's near the Dongdaemun Night Market. I think you'll enjoy grabbing some dinner there."

"Yeah, I'll come with. That sounds fun." You began to walk alongside of him as he walked back towards the opposite end of the street.

"Sorry, were you done looking here? I could accompany you while you keep looking." He paused to look down at you.

"No." You instantly shook your head. "Uh, I think I'm all good." You took one last look behind you, a little unsure since there was a store you still wanted to check out before leaving. You didn't wanna burden Jimin and his friends though, this wasn't their plan.

"You sure?" He smirked.

"Maybe not?"

"Let's go, I can tell you still wanna look around."

"Jimin, I can go alone-"

"It's not an issue, Y/N. Besides, Jungkook and Taehyung are still wandering around." He nodded towards the one shop you were eyeing. "Come on." You smiled toothlessly and followed him into the store.

"By the way, nice contact name." You showed him his contact info on your phone, making him laugh.

"Yeah, it's gold isn't it? Trying to stand out. I'm surprised you kept it."

"Your work of art. I don't meddle."

"Ah, touché. I like a girl who can appreciate good art." He winked, causing your cheeks to heat up as you blushed and looked down at the ground below you. He stepped into the clothing store and slowed his pace to let you lead the way. The one thing you were eyeing were the puffy jackets and coats because who can have too many outerwear? Jimin bit onto his bottom lip as he watched your eyes light up at the coats in front of you, touching everything you came across.

"These are so cute. I want it all." Jimin chuckled.

"Looks like you'll be needing another luggage to go home with you." You hung onto a beige colored puffy jacket, then reached out for a plaid coat.

"There's so many colors, I can't decide." He pointed to the plaid coat next to the one you had reached out for.

"That color would look nice on you." You smiled at him and nodded.

"Thanks. That makes it easier."

"You do have enough warm jackets for your stay right? There's a possibility it'll snow soon."

"Yeah, I think I'll be alright?" He nodded.

"I don't know Y/N, that doesn't sound convincing." He did a quick head tilt. "Make sure you get something warm then, please. The cold bites down here. I wouldn't want you to be miserable for the rest of your stay." He leaned against the rack. "Like that." He pointed at a thick parka. "Might be good to have that in your stack."

"Ou." Your mouth formed an 'o' shape as you grabbed the olive parka and swung it over your arm.

"Well, that was easy." He laughed.

"I trust your word." You began to quickly scan the rest of the floor, making sure you wouldn't miss anything. But also, you didn't wanna take too much time off of Jimin's hands.

"Ayo!" You hear someone call from behind you. You continue to walk the floor, hearing Jimin's laugh from behind, followed by a couple of unfamiliar voices. "Stop being a creep."

"I'm not being a creep, you idiot." Jimin laughed and shrugged off his friend. "I'm helping Y/N out."

"She's here?" You turn to look at the three boys standing behind you.

"Y/N, this is Jungkook and Taehyung." You smiled softly and shook their hands. "I really apologize about them in advance."

"Hey, nice to finally meet you!" Jungkook smiled as he pushed Jimin aside. He was also very attractive, standing just an eensy weensy bit taller than Jimin. He had tattoos on his hand and his wavy, black hair was parted, falling down on either sides of his face and right at the eyes. He had big, doe eyes and a good build. Even though he was wearing baggy layers, you could tell his ass lived at the gym with the way his shoulders were built and how his collarbone was sharply poking out from his shirt.

"Sounds like you've heard of me." You chuckled.

"Jimin won't stop bringing up your name."

"Don't listen to him. He's making that up." Jimin's cheeks turned slightly rosy.

"That's not nice to lie, Jimin-ssi." Jungkook pinched his side, making him laugh and playfully hit him back. You scrunched your nose at how cute the interaction was, not feeling out of place at all between the two.

"Hey Y/N, Taehyung." Taehyung shows off a boxy smile as he gently shakes your hand. He looked like an artist, pulling a Jack from Titanic who was ready to draw one of his french girls kind of vibe - clad in brown pants, a black turtleneck, a long coat and low cut sneakers.

"She's gonna come along with us."

"Cool! Preparing yourself for the weather?" Jungkook asked as he quickly checked out the men's shirts across from you, while Jimin and Taehyung continued to talk and laugh on the side.

"I was warned by Jimin." You chuckled.

"He's right, it can be freezing here. Do you need any help carrying your stuff?"

"I'm good! Thanks. I think I'm about done anyways." Your mouth curved into a small smile before you walked off to the registers, grabbing a scarf on the way over just because. You definitely did not anticipate to spend like this already, but hey, self-care am I right?

"Let me hold that for you." Jimin takes the paper bag from you.

"You don't-"

"Is it like this in California or something?" He laughed.

"What?"

"Feeling shy when someone offers to hold your bags?"

"It's just not a consistent thing, I guess? At least not that I've experienced much. It could be different for others." You spare him the details. Now that you think of it, Romeo has never offered to carry your bags like that. Ever. He obviously lacked a lot of common courtesy.

"Interesting." Is all he says as he shrugs and continues on. You clutched onto your bag strap as you followed the three, suddenly questioning how you got from going around solo to now tagging along with your home swapee's brother and his friends. Jimin slightly slowed his pace to catch up to you, pulling you out of your thoughts when he shared a small laugh. "You okay? Suddenly having regrets?"

"No, I'm good." You chuckled as you tugged into the strap harder.

"Do you ready any comics?"

"I used to when I was younger. Now I just don't have time to even find a good read."

"That busy, huh?"

"I guess so. Or I guess, sorry, I just don't find the time so it's partially my fault."

"No need to apologize. You should make more time for yourself though."

"Yeah, I know." You looked up at him and smiled toothlessly. He returns the favor before opening the back passenger car door for you, allowing you to situate yourself first. As you fasten your seatbelt, Jungkook adjusts his rearview mirror before starting the car and switching its gears.

"So, what's California like?" Taehyung asked as he whipped his head around from the passenger's seat.

"You never said exactly where you were from." Jimin chimed in as he cocks his head to the side to look at you.

"Los Angeles." The boys collectived oo'd and aw'd together.

"I've been there before!" Jungkook rose one hand off of the wheel. "I did a summer dance camp there and spent time with my family going around. Like Universal Studios, that was fun." He excitedly bounced in the driver's seat.

"Did you like it?" He nodded happily.

"Very much so. I'd love to go back. You should take me with you when you go back." Jimin threw a piece of crumpled paper at the back of his head.

"I'll keep that in mind." You laughed.

"The views are amazing and-" Jungkook continued to reminisce on his memories, but was abruptly cut off by Taehyung.

"I wanna hear what it's like from Y/N, not you." Jungkook popped Taehyung on the side of neck.

"It's busy." You chuckled. "It's busy and usually always hot. Lots of people, lots of cars, lots of things to do. People are always on the move."

"Does it feel any different being here?"

"Yeah, it does. I can't really explain it." Although Seoul was just as lively and the hustle and bustle was apparent, Los Angeles just felt like.. life was moving way too fast. Like no one really had time to appreciate life as much as they do here. There's always things that need to get done, and you're more worried about other people than yourself. No one took the time to just slow down.

"I imagine so. I've seen a lot of things about LA. Lots of Hollywood stars and famous people." Taehyung continued to look at you, resting his head against the head rest.

"Yeah, that's definitely the it thing there."

"Maybe we can all go back with Y/N."

"I don't have a big place but I'm sure we can make it work." The rest of the ride included the boys loudly singing along to the songs that came up. If you weren't mistaken, you could have sworn you heard Jimin's angelic singing voice pop out every now and then. He tried to keep it lowkey. Keyword: tried.

At the comic cafe, Taehyung and Jungkook went their separate ways to find what they were looking for while you stayed near the entrance, looking at the cute stationary items. Jimin had left you to browse but came back to your side as soon as he found what he needed, worried you'd feel lost and out of place. You reassured him and told him he didn't need to rush, but as you were picking up quite quickly, it was just in Jimin's nature to be that caring.

Time had gone by so fast, you didn't even realize how hungry you were. Dongdaemun Night Market was crowded as hell; so crowded that you had to try your best to squeeze through without being rude.

"Y/N, hold onto me." Jimin looked back, holding out his arm for you to hook onto. Jungkook led the way, with Taehyung holding onto his shoulders as they navigated through the crowd. Jungkook looked back at you both, pointing towards one of the food vendors. "Are you okay with eating some tonkatsu?"

"I'm down for whatever." You said, feeling a little flustered from the crowd. Jimin signaled a thumbs up to Jungkook before turning towards the seating area. He was able to snag a table so that you both could sit and wait, instead of being in the crowd.

"Sorry, I forgot to mention that it gets really busy here."

"It's alright, thanks for guiding me through the crowd."

"You feeling tired or anything?"

"A bit." You yawned into your elbow.

"We'll get you home after so you can rest up." Sooner or later, Jungkook and Taehyung come back with two trays, both loaded with tonkatsu rice bowls and sauce.

"Here you go." Jungkook smiled as he placed your bowl down in front of you.

"Oh, thank you! How much do I owe you?"

"Don't sweat it. My treat." He shook his head.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive, Y/N. Please eat." He chuckled. The rest of dinner was pretty quiet, as everyone was hungrier than expected. They would break the silence every now and then, talking about the rest of their friends and what they had been up to.

"What are your friends like, Y/N?"

"Well, to be honest, I don't have too many." You chuckled. "Not many I can actually call friends, at least."

"That's valid. That's like us, too." Jungkook responded.

"I met both of my bestfriends in high school. I'd meet people through them, but that's about it. They're really cool though, I think you all would get along with them quite well."

"What are their names?"

"Yoongi and Namjoon. They're all I really know. We've done almost everything together and we've always stuck by each other. They've always had my back and protected me."

"That's good. It's nice to have people like that in your life." Jimin says.

"What about you guys?" Taehyung adjusts the heat in the car before whipping his head around to face you.

"You should hang out with us more so you can meet Hoseok and Seokjin-hyung." Taehyung smiled. "They're super social and they always have good energy. They're fun to be around."

"Sure." You chuckled. By the time you were getting really comfortable with the warmth in the car, you had arrived back home. Jungkook and Taehyung greeted you goodnight before Jimin had shut the door and walked you upstairs.

"I know we didn't do much, but I still hope you enjoyed yourself."

"I did, thank you. Seriously."

"Did you wanna, maybe, hang out again?" He shyly asked as he scratched the nape of his neck. He was cute nervous, and there was no way you could say no to him. Besides, you were sure Jimin could help you explore more. "I just have to help my mom and dad out at their cafe tomorrow morning, but I should be good by lunch time."

"Yeah, I'd love to."

"I promise I won't disappoint." He laughed. "Goodnight, Y/N. See you tomorrow?" You nodded as you walked in. He gave off one last big smile before descending down the steps.

And you weren't gonna lie to yourself. He was so damn attractive. Everything about him so far was just different. You couldn't help but feel a little bit excited to hang out and spend more time with him.

[amydancepants-peralta]

Could you write a fic about the cold open of 7×04 and what actually wouldve happened if terry wasnt in his office 😂 (By the way i love your content!)

I definitely can!  (Did I spend the majority of today writing this, and very little else?  Yes I did.  Was it a valuable use of my time?  Absolutely.)

Rated NSFW - and also available on AO3 if you’d prefer. 👮🏽‍♀️

oh captain, my captain

With a satisfied hum Amy adjusts the last pile of paperwork on the desk, nudging it slightly to the left so that it sits perfectly perpendicular with both the right and bottom edges of the wood grained surface.  Double checking that all breakable items have been stored away for safekeeping, she stands in the centre of the captain’s office once done, folding her arms across the front of her chest as she allows herself a cursory nod of approval. 

There’s an anxious energy running through to the tip of her right foot, and the steady tick of clock on the wall reminds her of the metronome that used to accompany every music lesson she took in high school.  Briefly, she wonders if her and Jake’s son will play an instrument as well.   

Her nerves are racing, and she’s barrelling towards a severe case of paranoia; but logically she knows that her plan is sound, so Amy runs through several key points in her head, one last time:

1: Scully and Hitchcock’s recent hare-brained plan to build and cook a Mega Pizza at their desk (their mourning period from the pizza vending machine finally coming to an end) had resulted in a small fire and the complete short-wiring of all electrical equipment on the fourth floor, rendering the bullpen and all surrounding offices completely useless,

2: Budget cuts meant that the repair crew would not be in for two more days, and due to the lack of security and surveillance, the floor had been cut off from access entirely - except for Sergeant Santiago, whom they’d trusted would hold the keys to each stairwell in safekeeping, and

3: The growing baby in her uterus has set her hormones onto an all-time high, and if there was any chance for this fantasy to come to life, it was right. now. 

Adjusting the tucked in edges of her version of work attire, Amy fiddles with the toy captain’s badge that she had clipped to the front.  It wasn’t nearly as shiny as the real thing, and was far too light to feel legitimate, but there was still a sliver of joy that ran down her spine whenever she looked at it attached to her chest.  One day, hopefully not too far from now, the real thing would be there permanently.

Flicking her wrist upwards, she looks at watch without ever registering the time.  It was relatively late in the evening and she had texted Jake fifteen minutes ago, explaining that she was finishing up some duties in the precinct and needed some help moving some heavy boxes around in Terry’s office.  Like the sweet and dutiful husband she knew him to be, he had responded within seconds, an emoji filled text message telling her that he was on his way.  

He had been so supportive the past five months - supportive for their entire relationship, if she really thought about it - stocking up on the one brand of tea that didn’t make her feel sick, offering regular back and foot rubs, drawing baths with just the right amount of hot water and bubbles, and complimenting her body with such sincerity that even on her worst days, Amy had still felt a little bit desirable.  He honestly had been exactly the kind of charming husband that she knew he would be, and she couldn’t wait to see him turn into an equally wonderful father to their son.  

She glances at the clock on the wall and sighs, shifting the captain’s hat she’s been holding to her left hand before placing it carefully on her head.  He just needs to work on his punctuality.  

Finally, she can hear the telltale squeak of his favourite sneakers, growing louder as he moves further into the bullpen, and only moments later he calls out - “Ames?” 

“In here!” Amy yells in response, adjusting the stark white blouse one last time and putting on her best Power Pose as she waits.  His steps are faster now that he knows where to go, and as he opens the door and sees his wife standing before him in a makeshift captain’s uniform, Jake’s eyes turn as wide as saucers.  

“Babe?”

“Detective Peralta.  It’s about time you got here.  Close the door.”

With his eyebrows flickering upwards, Jake blinks a few times before responding, the blinds rattling slightly at the force of his movement.  “Yes, ma’am, I apologise for the delay.  I got caught up in - ”

“Spare me the details, detective.  We can discuss your issues with time management later.  There are more important matters at hand.”

His posture straightens and he nods, and a familiar twinkle begins to show in those beautiful brown eyes.  

Focus, Amy.

“It’s come to my attention recently that, despite previous scenarios that have held similar elements, there still appears to be a pressing need for the reality to occur.”  She can see Jake suppressing a grin, and holds her ground as he starts walking towards her.  “And while said earlier exercises have held a very high success rate, it would seem as though sometimes there is just no substitute for the real thing.”

Jake stops just in front of her, close enough that Amy can smell that intoxicating mix of cologne and their fabric softener and Jake.  His grin hasn’t faded - if anything, it’s grown - and he grips his hands behind his back like a dutiful officer of the law.  While his eyes trace up and down her body, taking in the uniform, his grin turns into a full-blown beam, and after he beat he leans forward to whisper -  “You want me to fuck you in the Captain’s Office?”

She nods, quick and stern, and corrects his inflection.  “I’m going to fuck you in the Captain’s Office.”

His breath is warm against her cheek as he lets out a grunted hell yeah, pressing his lips against hers a mere second later.  Warm hands are wrapped around her waist, and hers curl around his neck as the need to be as close as possible to him overthrows the need to play pretend, and when his tongue massages hers Amy cannot help but let out a contented sigh.  

His face has taken on That Look when they finally pull apart, that I’m so turned on look that Amy loves to see (but really, she loves all of his faces, and damn anyone who says that makes her a lovestruck fool), and her heart begins to race at the anticipation of what’s to come.

They’d only been dating a few weeks the first time they tried this; a pared down version of role play with Jake using his very best authoritative captain’s voice and turning Amy on so quickly that the resulting sex had led to multiple orgasms for both.  For their one year anniversary (a date that had been delayed slightly by a temporary Floridian residence), he had set up the reading room in her apartment to be an almost exact replica of Holt’s office, and proceeded to fuck her on every single available surface.  It was a treasured memory, and one that rated very high on her list of Favourite Sexy Timez, and even to this day she cannot read a book in there without getting turned on just a little bit by the thought of it.

Over the years they’d branched out into various role plays, with a special section of their closet dedicated specifically to the costumes they’ve acquired along the way, and while Jake has definitely seen Amy in this captain’s uniform before she’s fairly certain that this change of scenery into something far more real is going to turn him even more than usual.

Lord knows it has definitely worked out that way for her.

His hands have stayed on her waist, and with a grin he yanks her closer, pressing his hips into hers.  Yep.  It’s definitely working for him too.

He pulls her in for another kiss, and as much as she wants to let him, there are a few important details that the need to iron out first, and so Amy presses her hands against the grey shirt that lay underneath his open flannel.

“There needs to be a few quick rules before we go through with this, Peralta.”

“Whatever it is, I’m going to say yes.”

“Obviously.”  She raises her hand, pointing her index finger upwards.  “Rule one, what happens in here never leaves these four walls.”

Jake nods.  “No doubt.  Rule two, I get to replay this in my mind whenever I feel like it.”  His hands slide lower, gripping her butt gently.  “And babe, I’m gonna feel like it a lot.”

Smiling, Amy shakes her head.  “Rule number three.”  She leans in, grabbing the open panels of his shirt and pulling him closer.  “You’ve gotta make me scream, babe.”

He grins, that sexy smirk that once only belonged in the bedroom but over the years has progressed to closets, kitchens, living rooms and even once an elevator with the emergency break on.  “Yes, Captain.”

Oh, mama.  Her breath catches in her chest, and Amy can feel her eyes widen as she looks up at her husband, the facade temporarily stripped away as she speaks.  “Say it again.”

Jake leans in this time, moving his hands to rest two fingers against his forehead, pushing them away quickly in a faux salute, and ohhhh mama.  “At your command, Captain Santiago.”

Her lips are pressed against his before another thought can be made, the amount of desire running through her veins providing more than enough fuel for Amy to get the fire started.  Jake’s hands move just as quickly, wrapping around her waist and pulling her closer before tugging at the blouse that she had tucked so perfectly into place.  Moaning into Jake’s mouth, Amy shuffles them backwards, casting both of his shirts to the floor and feeling the edge of the desk scrape along her thighs as they make their way to the tall leather chair that has held such power in so many moments.  

Jake pushes her against the desk before they can get there, digging his fingers into her ass with such ferocity that Amy feels the blood rush in for repair at his release, and when his hands move up to undo her buttons she lets out another encouraging moan into his mouth.  It had been a passing joke when Jake had misinterpreted her request, months ago on the morning of the Jimmy Jabs, but Amy would be lying if she said there hadn’t been a frisson of excitement run down her spine at the suggestion of it, and now that it was finally happening, she couldn’t wait to get to the good stuff.

A rush of cool air hits her overheated skin as Jake flicks open the last button on her blouse, shoving the panels to the side and letting out an appreciative sigh at what he finds underneath.  She knew him to be a fan of the curves that her pregnancy has blessed her with - particularly when it came to her boobs - and Amy had done her due diligence in researching a front clasping bra specifically for this occasion.  It was nude in colour - work appropriate of course, even if this particular uniform is technically a costume - and had just enough padding and lace to make her chest look incredibly inviting.  

“Ames,” Jake whispers, eyes bright with attraction as he leans down to begin a trail of kisses against her bare skin, scraping his teeth along her collarbone.  Carding her fingers through his hair, Amy uses her right hand to reach in-between Jake’s chest and hers, undoing the clasp in a practiced move and Jake sighs in approval at the sudden change of pace.  His hands move lower; undoing her navy blue slacks as his tongue laps gently at each of her nipples, already aware of the sensitivity that she’s begun to experience there, but tonight all of her nerves are on high alert in other places, and so Amy digs her fingernails into Jake’s hair in silent encouragement to continue.  

He lets out another moan, the sensation of his voice vibrating against her skin as he leaves a gentle bite underneath one breast, lifting her hips up slightly to push her slacks towards the floor.  Amy kicks off her shoes quickly and Jake follows her lead, listening for the heavy thunk as both hers and his hit the ground.  She lets her hands linger along the bulge of her husband’s biceps as they wander lower, undoing the button and fly of Jake’s jeans as his lips move back up towards hers for a heated kiss.

His hands roam along the curve of her belly, touch turning incredibly soft as he traces the gentle swell where their son is currently growing.  He’s been so incredibly enamoured with watching Amy’s body grow, making it a daily ritual to kiss both her and her bump good morning and good night and making Amy’s heart flutter just a little bit each time.  Some nights he rests his head against her abdomen as they lay together on the couch, and on lazy mornings when getting out of bed seems like way too much of an effort he will shuffle down the mattress, leaning in to tell their baby boy the story of how he and Amy met, peppering the moments with truly terrible dad jokes that she just knows he’s been storing up for future reference.  

“You really are my dream girl,”  Jake mumbles against her cheek as he kisses a path towards her earlobe, nipping gently at the hypersensitive spot that only he knows about just below.  Amy’s responding giggle turns into a gasp as he does so, and she grips the waist of his jeans and pushes them down as far as her position will allow, waiting for Jake to pull back slightly so that he can take care of the rest of the material.

The chair moves back into her eye line as Jake shakes the last leg of his jeans off, and Amy rises from her perched position on the edge of the desk to meet her husband, planting her palms square against his chest as she shoves him backwards.  His butt lands square on the seat as he lets out a surprised yelp, and she grins.  “Now I’ve got you exactly where I wanted you, detective.”

He lets out a soft laugh, his arousal obvious in the unusual gruffness of his voice (and the sizeable bulge in his boxers), opening his arms out in silent invitation - and it’s one that Amy is very willing to respond to.  She moves towards Jake, resting one hand along the top of the chair as she plants one knee on the cushion beneath them, and then pauses.

“Wait … the arms on this don’t move.  Can you - ”

“Uh … what if I - ”

“Oof.  Okay let me just put my knee - ow, babe!”

“Sorry!  I think maybe if ..”

“This belly doesn’t make things … How about - Oh god no, my back!”

Out of nowhere, Jake bursts into laughter, the absolute ridiculousness of the situation causing his chest to bounce with joviality.  His hands are resting against Amy’s back, low enough to support her movements as she laughs along with him, tucking her head into his neck as the tears streak down her face.  In mere seconds, all of the tension dissipates, and that is a skill that only someone like her husband could possess.  

Amy rests her hands against Jake’s dancing shoulders, sliding her palms up to cup his jawline, taking in his infectious smile and oh how she loves this man.  Both of their pants are on the floor of their superior’s office, her shirts is wide open and Jake’s hair is all over the place from her fingers running through it, but she feels as comfortable right here as she would if they were at home on their couch.  

She loves Jake Peralta for a lot of reasons, and that was never going to change.  

Bending slightly lower Amy tips the captains cap back and drops her forehead to rest against Jake’s, leaving a soft kiss against the bridge of his nose as their laughter begins to trickle to a stop, and it’s only a second later that he moves his head to capture her lips with his own.  It’s a simple kiss, the sweetness of it all proving to be too much for Amy as they part, and she strokes Jake’s right cheek with her hand stating the most simples of truths: “I love you.”

His cheeks flush slightly as he looks up at her in utter adoration, right hand sliding along her outer thigh as he replies.  “I love you too, Ames.”  Shifting his body ever so slightly, Jake digs his fingers into her skin and continues.  “Here, rest your weight on this leg .. I have an idea how we can make this work.”

“I’m still not going to be able t-ohhhhh.”  The protest dies in the back of Amy’s mouth as Jake’s fingers push her underwear to the side, the angle of her half standing position giving him easy access to where she really wants him.   He circles her clit slowly, watching her lungs expand and contract as he slowly gains speed, and as Amy moves her hands to his shoulders, Jake dips his middle finger inside.  Her breath hitches, and he pulls out before returning, once with two fingers and then again with three.  

“So wet, babe.  You’ve been thinking about this a lot, huh?”  Jake’s lips are pushing against Amy’s before she can answer, and the feeling of his fingers pumping in and out of her takes all response away from her, letting her tongue push against his in response instead.  

She comes to when he finally pulls away, taking in a shuddering breath before throwing him a withering stare for a millisecond, stating “You were ten minutes late, Peralta.”  Pulling him back in for another kiss Amy sinks her teeth into his lower lip in admonishment, and Jake’s responding groan vibrates again her chest.  She smiles when they part, running her hand through his hair and tugging gently at the roots.  “I had to think about something to pass the time.”

“Mmm,” Jake moans, tucking his head into Amy’s neck as his fingers move faster, “Let me make that up to you, babe.”  He makes no hesitation in twisting his wrist, circling his thumb around in the small, rapid circles that he does so expertly.  It’s a well-practised move, one performed only two days ago when he crowded her up against the kitchen sink and pushed her over the edge while they waited for their coffee to finish brewing. 

His fingers stop pumping, pushing in deep and holding still while slightly crooked.  Jake grins up at her as his thumb doubles down in intensity, and Amy tightens her thighs against his wrist as she comes with a stuttered gasp, a mumbled version of her husband’s name falling from her lips as her shaking legs release him from her grip.  She giggles softly (at least, as much as her racing lungs will allow her) and grabs Jake’s hand as he pulls away, pulling it towards her lips and sucking gently on his fingers, sighing in satisfaction at the taste of her arousal.  “Consider yourself forgiven.”

His hand falls from her grasp, and Jake stretches himself up to kiss Amy, gripping his arms around her lower back tightly as he lifts off of the chair, stumbling back towards the desk and resting her butt against the surface once he feels the hard wood press against his thighs.

“I need to be inside you,” he mumbles between hot kisses as his fingers grip the top of her panties, and Amy lifts her hips again to help the fabric disappear faster.  He makes quick work of his own boxers once her underwear is on the floor - and honestly Amy has fantasised about giving Jake a blowjob in this office enough times that she genuinely had planned to do so - but all the hormones that her body was producing right now had turned her into a horny mess and she, too, needed him inside her now.

Spreading her legs as Jake moves in between them, Amy raises her hand up and pulls away the captains hat that she’d managed to keep on until now, resting it on the surface before planting her hands behind her body for support.  She smiles up at Jake as he groans with lust, pumping his wrist up and down his cock while his tongue darts out to moisten the edge of his mouth.  “You truly are the sexiest woman alive, you know that right?”

She nods, and Jake leans in for a kiss, tongue slipping into her mouth as he pushes his cock inside, fingers digging into her hips before resting beside hers on the desk.  This time it’s Amy’s turn to moan as Jake begins to pump slowly, getting both of them used to this unfamiliar position, and honestly every thrust already feels incredible.  

He watches her with the careful eyes of a well-trained detective, but also that of an attentive husband (both of them had discovered that once pregnant, Amy’s body gave different reactions to things that used to work so well), and she gives Jake an encouraging nod of her head as he begins to pick up speed.  She couldn’t tell if it was the angle that the desk presented, or the fact that there were doing it in the captain’s office, but everything felt fucking amazing and she could already feel her body beginning to respond.

“Oh god Jake, yes …”  Bending back on both hands Amy tents her knees, resting her heels precariously along the edge of the desk and letting her body bounce to the rhythm of Jake’s thrusts as all of nerve endings begin to come alive.  The various collegiate novels and industry awards that are lined up on the shelves behind Jake catch her eye, and the sheer illicitness of what they are doing feels better than she could have possibly anticipated.  They should have done this years ago.  Her husband’s right hand moves to cup one of breasts, pushing the heel of his palm along the bottom just the way she likes, and the pressure feels so good that she lets out a gentle moan.  His fingers move further, circling her sensitive nipple with his thumb and only weeks ago an action like that would have had her screaming in pain, but thank god her body has adjusted to these changes because NOW it feels like he’s lighting a match with every stroke, pushing her closer and closer to combustion.  “Yes!  Harder, babe!”

Jake’s breath is hot against her neck as he leaves a series of slopping kisses, dropping one to her mouth before pulling away, breathless.  “You feel so good Ames, so hot … I can’t believe we’re fucking in the captain’s office.  Fuck I love you.”

Amy moves her head back up slightly, eager to watch her husband as he moves closer to the point of no return, and the sight of his beautiful face as he thrusts harder and harder makes Amy call out his name, circling one leg around his lower body in silent encouragement for more.  Glancing behind her quickly, Amy grips the edge of the captain’s hat from the desk, using her thumb to rotate it within her grasp and places it onto Jake’s head with a cheeky grin.  It seems to spur him on, her body rocking against the desk with every single thrust as he increases the intensity, that determined look that she loves so much falling onto his face as he pushes harder and faster. 

Amy lets her hand slide back down his chest, pinching his right nipple as she goes before heading straight for her clit, holding on to Jake’s steady gaze as she begins to move her fingers in the rapid circles that never fail to get her off.  She doesn’t want this to end, but her first orgasm had felt so. good! and she was absolutely ready for another.  The handles on the desk drawers beneath them begin to rattle as Jake really begins to hammer into her, clearly racing towards climax as he mouths Ames over and over.  

The sensation of it all becomes too much a couple of minutes later and Amy cranes her neck back, calling out her husband’s name as another orgasm takes over her body, the delicious rush of it all making her giggle nonsensically.  From above her, Jake moans as Amy’s insides pulse around him, and when she drops her chin to watch him he grips her butt in both hands, pulling her as close as the bump will allow and changing the angle completely.   

His pubic bone rubs against her clit with every forceful pump from this new position, and even though Amy’s just had an orgasm and she would normally be oversensitive by this point, she’s also incredibly turned on - and as Jake’s thrusts continue she grips her other leg around his waist, holding on to him with nothing but her lower body as another wave washes over her.  This time proves to be too much for Jake as he follows her over the edge, digging his fingers into her skin and calling out her name as he releases everything he has.   

It takes a while for either of them to come down from the high, with only the sound of panting breaths and gentle kisses filling the room.  Slowly they part, holding out items of clothing to the other as they begin to put themselves back together, adding in a lingering touch every time one of them is near enough.  

They clear away the evidence of their tryst with the practiced efficiency of a team that know each other inside and out (because really, that’s the only way you could describe their partnership by now), and Jake pulls Amy in for one last lingering kiss as he fastens the top button of his jeans.

“Alright babe, I’m just gonna grab a few things from my desk while I can get to it, and then let’s go home, yeah?”

Amy nods, running her hand along her ponytail and quickly deciding it probably needs to be redone.  “Yep, I’ll be right out.  Oh, and Jake?” 

He turns at the doorway, one hand still gripping the outside frame, and Amy takes deliberately strong steps towards him.  Grabbing him by the collar, she yanks him in hard and fast for a swift kiss, pulling away before he can even try to deepen it.  There’s a flustered look on his face as they part, which when matched with his I just had sex hair makes him all the more adorable, and Amy gives him a quick wink before pushing him out completely.

“Dismissed.” 

[blackfemmecharacterdependency]

26. I Hate This Fandom, and I Hate All of You

I absolutely stole this line from an old friend in the Glee fandom, because it’s one that I think about EVERY TIME a fandom gets on my nerves, much the way that even this fandom does and in particular Simon stans. Idk what to tell y’all if y’all feel some type of way... be better people. ANYWHO! Shoutout to my friend for a quote that still means a lot to me 10 years later. Word Count: 4119

Previous

There was a lot of buzz surrounding the mini vacation for Simon’s birthday. Their families were together in Belize. Simon’s photos only reflected Simon either being with Grace and Hazel on the trip, or Grace. For the type to hyperfixate and go through everyone’s pages, they could find entire group photos and stuff on Mr. Laurent’s and Mrs. Monroe’s pages as Mr. Monroe didn’t have social media and Mrs. Laurent’s wasn’t sophisticated (inspirational quotes and recipes and DIYs that she was never going to actually try). Simon’s selected photos always looked like professional stills of the scenery, candids and capturing all the beauty possible, while Grace took hundreds of photos of everything from hijinks and mishaps to food to selfies, and they always just looked like somebody living her best life.

But, someone asked, “Are you in Belize with Grace Monroe?” on Simon’s photo of a pair two pairs of bare feet in the dirt - one an older person, dark brown skin, several scars from previous damages and new callouses, and a younger person’s lighter brown skin and cutesy temporary tattoos on the base of their feet. 

“Grounding, also called earthing, is a therapeutic technique that involves doing activities that “ground” or electrically reconnect you to the earth. This practice relies on earthing science and grounding physics to explain how electrical charges from the earth can have positive effects on your body.” Simon had put as the caption. In the same photo set, you could see an image of his own feet in the dirt, and...

“These are Grace and Hazel Monroe’s feet, right???” When they flipped through the set, there was near the end of several pictures of the landscape and sky, silhouettes of two people in the sunset - remarkably shaped like Grace and Hazel dancing in the dirt.

“OMG OGM GOM MOG MG OOMG…”

“Simon and Grace are BACK ON y’all!”

“Grace is letting Simon post photos of her! You all know that she’s very secretive about Simon these days, and now they’re in Belize and he’s posting photos! We WON everybody!”

“GRACE???”

Grace’s comments were a little bit less like that. A little bit. She had almost forgotten how “Simon’s fans” could get. She had looked up one of those “foods to order when you’re in Belize” articles and gotten everything on the list, took a photo of the table top and captioned, “About to go IN!” And less than a few moments later, had SO MANY, “Are you with Simon/Simon is gonna eat most of that/Save some for Simon/What did Simon order/So jealous that you get to eat all of that! Save room for desert AKA Simon!” That was the point where she decided to go on a comments black out. There could be no more comments on whatever photos that she took for the rest of the trip. Simon left his open, though. It blew his mind that half a year ago, people were telling him that they were disappointed in him for hurting Grace and lying about it, or that they were disappointed in him for trusting Grace again after everything, and now SOME of those very same people were extremely excited just to see them having brunch together that they were already working on wedding date headcanons and pregnancy foreshadowing. This entertained him. Grace wasn’t as much of a fan and contacted Hazel’s social media rep to ensure that any comments or questions about Simon were promptly deleted from any of her pages. Sometimes, they did that too. That was less amusing to Simon. He really believed that kids should be left out of things like that.

Simon knew that he was the reason that they didn’t last, as friends or otherwise and he had come to terms with that, but he still wanted her to be able to forgive him someday, trust him again and let him be a part of her life. This wasn’t her intention with this trip, so he definitely couldn’t take it as a sign. She was enjoying Belize with her daughter and making the most of the fact that her parents had foolishly invited him along, thinking it could be beneficial in some way. That didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to enjoy his limited time with her to the fullest. 

Plus, he and Hazel had made some small steps to acceptance on her tour of their memory lane. Surprisingly to him, Grace was very open with Hazel about her wrongs. She did tell her about how she fought and hunted down Simon’s bullies, how she stabbed one with a fork and kept it just to remind herself of that day. She told her things that Simon never would have wanted to ever let his kids know that he had done. Hazel just hugged her, told her that she understood her pain better now and that she was proud of her for being able to be a good and strong person now. She posted something about her mom being her hero and being so glad that she had somebody like her in her life. It was really cute. 

Simon went to follow her on her social media and someone even noticed THAT. “Simon Laurent is now following Hazel Monroe on like everything!” They posted with screenshots of his name following each account and an eyeballs emoji. He… blocked the person. He didn’t block people very much, but where Hazel was concerned, he didn’t want any of his stuff to bleed over into her space. Grace wouldn’t like that and he didn’t like it, either. 

He and Hazel had spoken about the charm bracelet. She had been chronicling the charms with their stories, and said something like, “I feel like I’m wearing a sacred relic on my wrist.” 

“Speaking of…” Simon had said, and reached into his satchel. “I made you copies of something…” 

He showed her some pages of what could ONLY be two Esmoroth books and she squealed, hugged them to herself and stuck them in her own tote. “Expect my notes on them, soon.” He gave her a salute. Grace watched them interact and she couldn’t remember many moments that he talked to kids - like she had seen him at work with them and even sometimes whenever she caught part of one of his scouts things, but seeing him and Hazel sort of bonding affected her. She was equal parts cautious and soft. Simon seemed genuine though, and that only became more noticeable during the trip.

He was doing stuff like making sure she was walking on the inside when they went down streets, reflexively shielding her in crowds, helping her over, up onto stuff whenever she looked like she might struggle - things that Grace would normally do/try to do but wait it out to see if Hazel could do it herself or ask her if she needed help. Simon jumped into action and it didn’t seem to bother Hazel, so Grace was able to watch her get babied a little bit. It was cute. She snapped several photos, just for herself, though. 

They got back to the villa to see that Mrs. Monroe had arranged another dinner. “This woman, I swear,” Grace mumbled. Simon laughed a little. 

Mrs. Monroe announced, “We had a spa day and I got the Laurents makeovers. The three of you get washed up and dressed. The photographer is already here and I don’t want him to catch you three looking like… This.” she circled her hands at them, then waved them off. 

“What… should I wear?” Simon asked as they walked off.

“I’ve set your outfits out!” Mrs. Monroe called at his back, “All of you!” 

“I really feel like I’m 15 again,” Grace said shaking her head. Simon let out a grunt of agreement. 

Hazel wondered, “This is what 15 feels like???” Not her 15. Grace was NEVER gonna do this type of stuff to her. But, the occasional bossiness of GlamMother Monroe would be fine. ONLY on occasion. 

They reconvened with the family on the patio, overlooking the water as they were relaxed enough to not be as uncomfortable as at the birthday dinner. Hazel and Simon were talking about how far along she had gotten in his book, which she had her copy of at the table and was going over notes so far (she was pleased with where it was going and she enjoyed the angst between the Future King and the Idol Princess, “A lot more than I would have before everything I learned about you and my mom,” Grace heard her say. 

“Do you want more?” Grace heard an unfamiliar voice ask. 

She turned to see Mrs. Laurent staring at her with gray eyes… Simon’s eyes. Ugh… This is where he got those? She forced a smile and shrugged, “Someday.”

The woman leaned closer to her and said, “It gets tougher whenever there’s another. You have a hard time juggling the same amount of love that you have in you between more bodies.”

“I don’t think I’ll have that problem, but I’m going to take everything that the professionals say into consideration whenever I begin to think about expanding the family.”

“Simon was really easy. You just give him a little block set or something to build and he would leave you alone for hours. His sister needed constant attention. She just couldn’t stand not being focused on. I could easily leave Simon alone for half a day whenever he was 6. Hope couldn’t be left for a couple of hours, even having someone there with her…”

“Leave her alone,” they heard Simon growl at his mother in a low voice. The woman frowned and sat back in her seat. “Are you okay, Grace?” Simon looked at Grace’s hands clutching the table. She looked at them too, and released her grip, then saw Hazel, looking at her concerned and looking at Mrs. Laurent suspiciously.

“Yeah. She was just talking about motherhood.”

“About how she was terrible at it?” Simon asked.

“Simon…” Grace started.

But Hazel interjected, “Not everybody has a mom like you, Grace.”

“My mom isn’t perfect…”

“I think she meant a mom who is like you,” Simon said. Hazel nodded. “Some of us got hit a lot and yelled at, called names…”

“Abandoned in a field for days…”Hazel added. “Not to say that GlamMother was better! Just… sometimes it’s harder to trust people again, depending on what they did and well… as a mommy, doing bad stuff to your kid makes it so hard to even be nice.”

Grace nodded and adjusted Hazel’s braids. She had braided her hair whenever they were on the plane, to pass the time on the long flight. “I understand. I’ve been hurt by somebody that I thought really loved me before…” Simon blinked and turned away. Hazel gave him a sympathetic glance. Grace added, “But, I’m really trying not to be angry with them forever, and I think maybe our moms might be able to inherit a little bit of the same kind of forgiveness that we would want from others.”

Hazel scoffed, “She is definitely talking to you, Simon. There’s no way I’m forgiving any time soon.”

Simon said, “Noted,” and stared into his cup. He sat for a while longer and then took his cup and left the table. Hazel lowered her eyes, avoiding looking at Grace. 

Mrs. Laurent offered, “He’s always been really sensitive. I’ll go…”

“No,” Grace said. “You… stay.” She stood up, glanced at Mrs. Laurent, slid Hazel’s chair away from her a little, basically letting Hazel know not to engage with that woman (though Hazel seemed to be the only person that the woman was kind hearted to, probably reminded her of her daughter or something). Grace found Simon pacing and clenching his fists. She turned to leave. This was a private moment, but he glanced up, saw her and stopped moving. She winced and clasped her hands together, “I was coming to check on you.” He relaxed a little and sat down on the nearby stairs. 

She leaned against the rail and explained, “I’m not saying that you have to forgive your mom if you want me to forgive you. That’s not what I meant to convey. I just mean… that I try to think about things from the other person’s shoes a lot more than I used to. I remember right before I snapped, I asked my mom if you really believed all of the things you said about me, or if you were just a really good liar. I still don’t really know for sure what the answer is and I don’t think you do, either. And, whenever we don’t even fully know ourselves, how can we possibly know what others are going through? For all I know, you’re in the most pain that has ever pained anyone. I couldn’t say. What I can say is that I won’t let your pain be an excuse to hurt me, and as long as you aren’t hurting me, I see no reason to punish you.” She sat next to him. “But, maybe you and your mom can’t be like that, and that’s valid. I was just throwing something out in the air. I probably should have thought it through.”

“It’s true though. The stuff I did is just as unforgivable as the stuff she did. How can I expect you to ever trust me again when I’m not willing to do the same with her?”

“I mean… you and me are different people. You and her are different people. Not everything is interchangeable.”

“Any time I’m near Hazel, you look like at any moment, you expect me to throw her into the ocean. It feels really bad, but I get it. So… I know that she MIGHT be hurting too. It’s just… so hard. And to think that this is the way that I make you feel when I’m around, trying to pretend that I’m normal… It’s the most painful part. What can I do though? I made it this way. I did things that can’t be undone. Even in trying to rectify it, that’s just… treating an injury. I’ll never be able to remove the scars.” He had tears falling down his face, which he wiped away before she could have the chance to feel bad. “And you’re the last person that I should be whining to about it, because you’re the victim in this story.”

“A survivor,” she corrected. “Who has chosen to try to understand. Let’s give each other a little more space. We went around town, living in the old days and that maybe threw us a bit out of reality’s orbit. You were fine before we hung out..” He opened his mouth to debate, but she caught herself and corrected, “Well, not fine, but better. And… you need to get increasingly better. Until you’re well.” She got up and he watched her go back out and collect Hazel. They turned in early that night. He went back out to talk to his mom… 

.

The Laurents were awake early and the only ones in the kitchen with Hazel whenever Grace emerged from their quarters. Mr. Laurent had made pancakes and eggs, and Hazel was stuffing her face and reading. Simon was next to her, ready to protect her, if he had to, while his mother was nursing a cup of coffee with a full, cold plate in front of her. “Good morning!” Grace cheered and kissed Hazel on top of the head, then Simon, though she awkwardly cringed after she did. He blushed, but didn’t make a big deal out of it. Yeah, she requested space, but she was also always affectionate and they had been around each other a lot the past few days. 

“Good morning,” Mr. Laurent said. “Plenty of pancakes and eggs!” 

“I’m having breakfast with my parents, but thank you for the offer,” she said in a fake sweet voice. “Hazel, why don’t you go get ready for the day. We’re spending it with your grands.”

“Yes!!! They give the BEST day out presents!” Grace sat down, and Simon noticed that with the off the shoulders blouse she had on, he could see the tan marks on her now even darker brown skin. He… liked tan marks. And… her hair smelled really good. Her lips looked so moist… She squinted her eyes at him and he quickly turned away and grabbed his plate and Hazel’s to clear them from the table. 

“What do you all have planned for the day?” She asked.

“I’m going to take Samantha to the beach,” Simon said. 

“If you can find her. I told you to keep her in her crate,” Mrs. Laurent said.

“I let her out in my quarters, not in the entire villa. She’s somewhere in my space,” he said. They had been bickering. He told her that he was trying to forgive her, because forgiving her might mean being able to forgive himself for the things that he had done. She told him that even if she tried for the rest of her life, she couldn’t forgive him for what he did to Hope… So… They weren’t any closer to whatever it was Grace was at in her growth journey. “I might do something with my hair,” Simon said, shrugging his shoulders as he washed dishes and returning his attention to Grace’s question. “Since I have that patch on the side from getting kicked in the head, I sort of want to do something Viking looking or elvish… Maybe a braid and a side do.”

“That sounds hot,” Grace said. He blushed again. “There might be something in Hazel’s Celtic book! There were some hairstyles in there. She carries the thing around a lot. Every since we found out that she had it in her DNA, she’s sorta been obsessed with Celtic history and the fact that there’s hazel tree lore is her favorite coincidence in the world.” Simon smiled and put the clean dishes away. 

“She’s a great kid. You’re doing great with her.”

“It’s really not that hard. I just love her a lot and always try to give her what’s best for her and trust her to let me know if she doesn’t agree with what’s best for her… which isn’t often, at all. I worry that she sometimes maybe has too much emotional maturity. Like, if I shouldn’t coddle her a little more…” She bit her lip. “Like… how can you even tell when it’s what’s best?”

“She is happy and healthy. I trust that you do what’s best.” He cut his eyes at his mother and dismissed himself just as Hazel returned. They high fived each other when they crossed paths and Grace got up so that they could leave. She’d meet her parents elsewhere later. She couldn’t just stay in there with the Laurents, no matter how nice they were maybe trying to be.

.

She and Simon did well enough keeping their space through the rest of the trip. By Monday morning, when they were all back home, Grace wondered if Hazel needed a day to recover, but she was SO READY to get to school and brag to her friends about how she had been given drafts of the next two books of Esmoroth and how she wouldn’t tell them what happened and they would be SO jealous and think she’s SO cool. “They might even think that I’m lying. That’s why I have photos of me and Simon, with both of the drafts. They’re gonna be extremely, extremely envious.”

Grace laughed, “Why do you want your friends to be envious?”

“Because, that’s how you know it’s the good stuff.” Hazel still had her braids in. They probably wouldn’t last as long as that style would in Grace’s head, but Grace estimated she still had a few weeks before they would have to take them down. Also, Grace noticed that after giving Simon the leaf in her hair whenever they went to get on their planes home… She hadn’t replaced it. She put in one of her leaf clips and almost left the door without Grace! Grace caught up with her and the girl was as lively as ever. Grace didn’t have that same enthusiasm. 

The weekend was exhausting for her. Seeing her parents wore her out. Seeing them, the Laurents, and specifically Simon? She was about to sleep this entire day, until it was time to meet up with Hazel afterschool. Back in her own bed, with her own energy in her space, her own schedule and company (or lack thereof) it was great. 

.

 Simon had went live while he was working on styling his hair, to clear up all of the rumors about he and Grace rekindling their romance, which essentially boiled down to, “Grace and I are not together. We aren’t even friends again. The Monroes were nice enough to treat my family to a vacation for my birthday. I love, admire, adore, worship, would die for Grace, but I’ve done too much stuff for her to ever trust me again and I have to be okay with that, so all of you should be, too.”

Grace didn’t know until Hazel told her that Forgive Him Grace and Groveling for Grace were a thing. She watched the video and was amazed that they had taken his words and decided to do the complete opposite, because of course they did! She merely made a post, with no tags or links that said, “I hate this fandom, and I hate all of you.” Some were in the comments laughing, because they knew exactly what she was talking about. Some were asking her what fandom it was and offering words of kindness. Some were just flooding it with those stupid hashtags. 

Simon messaged her to apologize and insist that he didn’t mean for THIS to happen. She turned it into a video call, which he immediately picked up.

“Your followers have always been a very… special kind. Unreasonable. Stubborn. Obsessively defensive, even when you absolutely don’t deserve it.” He looked embarrassed. “You trained them too well. Jeesh.”

“They’re literally a little cult on the internet,” he said.

“Yup. They better not be bothering my baby.”

“No. I shut that shit down the moment I see it. I actually pinned an exile list to the top of my pages specifically for that.”

She checked and saw “For troubling Hazel Monroe, you will be exiled and your name will go upon this wall of shame.” It was followed by a list of names of people he blocked and at the bottom, “Leave her alone or you won’t be welcome here.” 

“This is kinda adorable,” she said. “I love how you are with her. It means a lot to me.”

“You mean a lot to me, so she does too,” he said. She bit her lip and blew air through her lips. He smiled. “I love that you still do that. I was counting the similarities and differences.”

“I’d love to hear what you came up with!” She said.

“Okay. Similarities: You still do that brrrr thing with your mouth when you’re thinking or uncomfortable. You still play with people’s hair as a show of affection. You playfully tugged on Hazel’s braids so many times! Your feet still bother you… though they seem to be giving you more trouble than before. You still try to play nice with people and speak sweetly… Differences: You’re more confident. Not that you were insecure before, but you used to care what people think about you and now, you just don’t. It’s really sexy.” She blushed. “You’re independent. You don’t need anybody else and you used to always want somebody around. Like, you love Hazel and keep her close, but I can tell that you also allow her freedom and don’t demand her obedience like your parents did to you. And you’re… everything. I can’t believe that I convinced myself that you were nothing. You’re everything, and I would do anything for you.” They both just stared at each other a while. 

“Well… That’s a nice thought. I’ll think of you if I need anything.”

“Or if you want anything…. Anything at all, Grace. I swear.”

“Okay. I’ll talk to you soon. Get your followers together!”

“I’m on it,” he said and rested his chin on his hands. She exited the conversation and took a deep breath. She didn’t know what he meant by any of that, but she had a feeling that it would be clear soon. Simon never made a declaration that he wasn’t going to come through about. Even “new” Simon. 

Next

[robotsandzombiesarebi]

Hss class act fanfiction

Looking at the same sky - part 3

(Skye x MC)

[A/N -- If you would like to be tagged in these chapters in the future, let me know and I'll make sure you're on the list.]

Skye read the message and felt a strange mix of relief for being able to talk to Bailey after the conversation she had just had with her mother, and nerves because of the words her girlfriend had used

'Can I call? We need to talk about something 🖤'

Running though several scenarios in her head, Skye threw herself on to her bed and wiped at her dampening eyes. She sent a thumbs up emoji back and waited for the phone to ring. Within seconds, her phone lit up, playing 'Love will tear us apart'. Looking at the screen, Skye saw that it was a video call coming through and quickly hit 'Decline'. Sending a quick message, asking Bailey to wait a few minutes, she dashed to the mirror to check the make-up on her eyes was intact and pulling off the tatty pyjama top she was wearing, covering herself instead with her black bathrobe. Settling back on to her bed, after running her fingers through her long red hair, she opened a video call with Bailey.

Within seconds, Bailey appeared on the screen. Her eyes were heavy and her smile was plainly forced. Skye mirrored her expression, trying to hide the way her last conversation made her feel. Bailey worried about her enough. She didn't need outdated thinking and unveiled homophobia from her family adding to it.

"Hey Bailey." She said softly, clearing her throat after to help her voice. Bailey was clearly checking her own reflection on her camera, subtly wiping at the bottom of her eyes and trying harder to school her smile.

"Hey Skye. I miss you" Her attention was now clearly on Skye who smiled contentedly at her.

"Its hardly been an hour. But I miss you too, especially when you're sweet."

"So always, right?" Bailey let out a small laugh that caught in her throat as she spoke.

"Yeah. You're always cute I guess." Skye smirked. "What did you want to talk about?"

"Well..." Bailey began. As she thought of the best way to approach it, she saw the poorly hidden, scared look on Skye's face. "What's wrong?"

The question startled Skye. Realising she should never have accepted a video call, she gave up trying to keep herself together. A glance at her door showed no shadows in the light under it. It wasn't unusual for one of them to decide to listen in so they stay in control of everything. Skye explained what had happened since they parted. Brian snooping, her mother's critique, her dad's obliviousness to her. By the time she had finished, her cheeks were streaked with charcoal tears. Bailey looked calm, taking in everything Skye was saying, giving her time to finish before reacting, but her eyes betrayed her anger. She was furious. They talked through it. Bailey helping Skye to process what she was feeling while listening to everything her girlfriend needed to get off of her chest.

Skye exhaled slowly, composing herself and ready to move on.

"You never said what you wanted to talk about" She said dryly.

"Oh yeah..." Bailey paused. "I was going to ask..."

"Hmm?"

"Are you wearing anything under that big ol bathrobe?" She giggled.

"Seriously?!" Skye gasped with a deep blush creeping over her face. "No..."

"No?!" Bailey choked out, her blush surpassing Syke's.

"I meant, no, that's not what you wanted to talk about"

"Oh right... yeah, I definitely knew that. It's ok, we'll talk tomorrow. It's nothing to worry about right now anyway."

"You sure?" Concern shook Skye's voice.

"Yeah. Are you ok? The last thing I want is you worrying." Bailey asked, searchingly.

"I am. I think I'm just tired at this point."

"It takes a lot out of you, huh?"

"Sometimes. Talking to you helps. You always know what to say."

Bailey blushed harder than before at the praise. Suddenly feeling a little relieved, knowing she would still always be able to talk to her, she could always be there for her that way.

"I'm here to help." She said with a salute to her camera. "You should get some sleep though. If you wake up, just call me, ok? You're not disturbing me, I promise."

"Okay. I will, if I need to." Skye assured her.

They said a short good night and ended their call, not before Bailey blowing Skye a loud kiss, then waiting expectantly for Skye to catch it, which she did with an eye roll. Skye settled under her covers easily, one hand tucked under her pillow, the other cradling her phone. She scrolled social media for a while, until her phone chimed with a notification from Bailey. Skye opened the picture that was captioned "There's nothing on under this bathrobe either"

When the picture opened, it was of Bailey's dog, Biscuit wearing her purple fluffy gown against his plush white fur. It made her smile, more than she had all night. Bailey could do that. Only Bailey.

'I really love her.' Was the last thought in Skye's mind as her eyelids hung heavy and she drifted in to a peaceful sleep.

--------

The next day, Skye was getting dressed and checking the time constantly. She always met Bailey at 10:45am. It gave her a perfect amount of time to leave her house without issue. Her dad leaves early, so does Brian. Her mother, being a woman of leisure, didn't leave the house until she was good and ready. The bar at the brunch place she met her 'friends' at on the weekends opened at 10:30, so she would leave 15 minutes before, giving Skye 10 minutes to leave her room and get out of the front door before Brian came home from the gym, stinking and overdosed on testosterone. She got out without a problem and took a slow walk in to town. As she got to the arcade, she saw Bailey hitting the side of a crane machine which had a plush toy hanging precariously over the edge of the prize slot.

"Why not just put in another quarter?" Skye commented from behind her, making her jump and knock the machine, causing the plushie to fall within reach.

"Yes! I never lose!" Bailey chuckled turning to Skye and holding out the toy for her. "Here, he's all yours."

"Oh, that's ok. I don't want to take your prize." She mumbled. Looking at the toy, she could see it was clearly a knock-off version of the doppelganger monster from the movie she had shown Bailey on the first (and last) night she had visited her bedroom.

"But I wouldn't have won it if you didn't make me knock in to the machine. Besides...." Bailey held out the little stuffed monster to her again. "...You're my prize."

Skye was use to the corny jokes, the cheesy one liners, the awful attempts at flirting. Her girlfriend was awkward, it was a fact. She usually compensated for this by saying whatever first came to mind so she didn't overthink what she was saying. It made Skye feel more secure, knowing that Bailey meant everything she said without any hidden intent.

"Your prize for what?" She asked shyly, gently taking the toy and fighting her smile back.

"Hmmm... putting up with Ajay. I should definitely be compensated for that."

"Don't forget Danielle." Skye smirked.

"The girl who made me look like I would risk someone's life for a role in a play. I had totally forgotten about her, thank you." She laughed, shoving Skye's shoulder slightly.

The two of them shared a sweet kiss and walked in to the arcade, hand in hand. After playing their usual favourite games they moved over to the cafe area to get some lunch. Skye ordered their food, refusing to let Bailey pay while Bailey tried to get the busted tablet attached to the table to work. Skye sat beside her, sliding her a red basket of fries and a soft drink.

"Any luck?" She asked, nodding at the tablet.

"No, but..." Bailey gestured to the window. "...How about some classic entertainment?"

Outside, Skye saw Brian, flocked by some of his friends, all of them wearing similar gym clothes, surrounding a small group of girls. Brian was the only one speaking by the look of it, until the entire group of girls burst with laughter as walked off practically holding their sides. Brian, who's face now matched his hair perfectly, stormed off in the other direction with his friends trailing behind. Skye and Bailey shared a smile before falling into a fit of loud giggles.

As they are their lunch, Skye began to notice how quiet Bailey had become. She wasn't even eating much, just pushing her food around instead.

"Bailey!" Skye called out.

"What?!"

"You're not this quiet. What's wrong?" She asked as she stared in to Bailey's eyes, trying to find an answer.

"So. Remember I said we needed to talk about something?" She muttered.

"Yeah. Then I dropped all that stuff about my family on you..."

"No. I wanted to know how you were. You didn't drop anything on me, Skye. It's not a burden, ok?" Bailey interrupted.

"Ok. Thank you. Yeah, I remember."

"Well. It's kind of serious. I don't really know what to say." Bailey looked down, avoiding Skye's eyes. "I don't want today to be ruined. I don't want to ruin any day with this, but..." She took a deep breath. "The sooner I say it, the more ready the two of us will be for it."

"Am I supposed to be scared right now? Because I am."

"Skye, I have to move. Away from Cedar Cove. Away from Berry..." Bailey's eyes misted and her breath caught as she spoke. "I'm so sorry"

Suddenly, there was no sound. The arcades went quiet, the sounds of people talking dimmed until they were mute. Bailey was still apologising, but the sound struggled to reach Skye's ears. The whole world seemed as though it was losing its connection and Skye's senses suffered it alone. Midway through what Bailey was trying to get across, Skye grabbed her by the loose green shirt that hung loosely from her and pulled her in to a tight embrace. Bailey's hands rested on Skye's back, drawing small circles against her frame. It was too much. There wasn't anything to say to make this better. It was bad, and no amount of 'sorry' could make it better. It wasn't Bailey's fault, this clearly broke her heart too. After a few minutes of the two of them holding eachother as though they would be pulled apart this second if they dared to let go, Skye spoke up, softly.

"But... I need you. Please... don't." The words were strained in her throat and her arms tightened around the girl who was her only beacon in the dark that surrounded her life.

"Skye. I'm sorry, I didn't want..."

"PLEASE!" Skye screamed without a single thought of who would hear her. "Please...?" She cried.

-------------

TBC in the next chapter....

[ladylillianrose]

You’ve Got SPRQS a Max Richman/Zoey Clarke Fanfiction

A/N: I'm back guys! So this plot bunny wouldn't leave me alone. You've Got Mail is one of my favorite movies, so I decided to take a modern ZEP twist on it! So hopefully you all enjoy this!

SPRQS messages are in italics

Thank you to my lovely beta aubreyrichman for looking things over and listening to me ramble.

Just borrowing the characters to play with, they're all Austin Winsberg's babies!

Summary:  A new dating app has just launched for the SPRQ Watch, called SPRQS. Joan signs Zoey up for it in order to help her meet someone. Will Zoey find someone? Can you really fall in love through an app? Inspired by You've Got Mail.

Chapter 1

"I'm sorry, you did what?" Zoey asked Joan incredulously.

"I signed you up for that new dating app that just launched on the SPRQ Watch," Joan calmly explained.

"Ooookay….but why me?" 

Joan raised her eyebrow at her, "Because, you need to try putting yourself out there!"

"But a dating app? Aren't those just hookup excuses?" Zoey asked, worrying her lip.

"Not this one! No photos, no real names and no personal info until you choose to disclose it. SPRQS is all about building a lasting connection through meaningful chats and messages with one another." Joan explained eagerly. 

"So it won't even interfere with your nonexistent social life. If you find someone you enjoy chatting with, then you talk with them until you're ready to meet in person. And when that happens, I'll go with you to make sure they aren't a homicidal knife wielding maniac." Joan reassured her.

Zoey sighed, "I guess that doesn't sound too bad."

"Great, so here's your login info. You just need to make a simple profile listing some of your interests, and then you just decide who you want to talk to." Joan beamed at her.

"CodeRedLeader?" Zoey looked at Joan skeptically.

"What? It works." She said dismissing Zoey. 

Zoey shrugged her shoulders and headed to her desk. She took a moment to write a short profile.  " My blood type is coffee. No, the moon landing was not faked. Aren't you a little short for a Stormtrooper?”

Within a few minutes she had a message from someone named PianoMan. 

"Why is it all the women I talk to prefer Star Wars to Star Trek? Genuinely asking, maybe I'm missing something."

Zoey chuckled, she glanced at his profile. It read,  "Office guy by day, Piano Man by night. Pitched that idea to Marvel, still waiting to hear back….Live long and prosper."

"Maybe it's because all the women you know appreciate the badassness that is Princess Leia who eventually becomes General, and the leader of the Resistance?"  She responded.

"Hmmmm...that does seem to track with the women I know….Hii by the way, I promise I don’t normally start all conversations with random questions about Star Wars vs Star Trek...some but not  all  .”

Zoey couldn't help but giggle, "Hi to you too."

"So….I'm not totally sure how this all is supposed to work,"  he confessed.

" A friend signed me up for this so I'm not that certain myself. She said something about using it to chat and get to know people. Which, considering how busy my life is right now, is about all I have time for."

"I totally get that. Things can get pretty crazy here too. Pretty much the only thing that keeps me sane sometimes is my piano."

"Oh, so you actually play? That's not just a clever screen name or line to get the ladies ;)" she teased.

"LOL! Oh, that's too funny if you think that line gets any ladies. But, yes I do play, I've been playing since I was a child. But what about you? CodeRedLeader? I can't make heads or tails of that."

"Well, RedLeader is of course for the far superior Star Wars, and what can I say? I just love Mountain Dew Code Red."  What the fuck am I saying? Mountain Dew Code Red? Really Zoey?

There was a pause as she waited for a response.

"Of all the soda flavors out there, you're telling me that Mountain Dew Code Red is the one you would choose? I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who would admit to that."

Zoey cringed,  "Umm yeah, it's amazing…"

"Lol, to each their own. Look, I have to get back to work before my boss realizes I haven't done anything in the past half hour. But, I'd like to keep talking to you if that's okay, Red?"

Zoey grinned,  "I need to get back to work, too. But, yes Billy, I'd like that."

He sent back a laughing emoji followed by a piano keyboard.  "Talk to you later, Red."

"Bye, Billy."

Zoey glanced up from her watch to see Joan watching her with an approving smile.

Zoey shook her head, turning to focus on her work, when she felt a cup nudge against her hand.

She looked up, and saw Max standing there with a cup of coffee held out to her.

"How did you know?" She asked, taking a sip and savoring the rush of caffeine.

"I figured if Joan was making you meet with her when everything was going pretty smoothly, then you might need a pick-me-up." Max grinned taking a sip of his own coffee.

Zoey smiled at her best friend, "Naw, it was just a checking in chat. Making sure everything is okay." She was too embarrassed to admit that Joan had signed her up for SPRQS. 

"Did you hear about this new dating app that someone came up with?" Max asked.

Zoey coughed as she inhaled her coffee too quickly. "There's a dating app?" She squeaked.

"Yeah, it's called something like SPRQLR, or SPRQR I think?"

"Hmm," Zoey feigned disinterest. 

"Yo bro, it's called SPRQS!" Tobin said as he approached them.

"You know like, you've got SPRQS of love because of the connections you make."

Max raised his eyebrow at him, "And how do you know so much about it?"

"Cause I signed up, dude! I'm going to find the perfect person to handle all of this," he gestured to himself.

Zoey turned pale as she realized that there was a possibility that Tobin was PianoMan.

"Random question, but do you play any instruments?" Zoey asked.

Tobin looked at her oddly, "Just my sweet skills on the mic and some beat boxing. Why do you ask?"

Zoey breathed a sigh of relief. "Just curious. I hear some girls are into musicians. So, you could always lead with that."

Tobin grinned, "Ooo, that's a good idea, Little Red. Woo a woman with my mad lyrics. You guys should check the app out, it's pretty sweet."

Zoey shook her head. "Oh no, I don't have time for anything like that." She lied.

"What about you, Maxi-Pad?"

"First, don't call me that. And second, it doesn't sound like my kind of thing. I prefer personal conversations to exchanging messages."

Well, that was at least two guys that Zoey could check off the list. Tobin didn't play piano, and Max clearly hadn't joined the app.

"Come on people, I'm not paying you to stand around and gossip!" Joan yelled from her doorway.

Tobin saluted her and sprinted back to his desk, throwing himself in his chair. "You got it, boss!"

Joan shook her head and returned to her desk.

Max and Zoey exchanged a look, and laughed.

"So, does that mean you aren't going to take Tobin's advice and sign up for SPRQS?" Zoey asked, tentatively.

"I'm no more likely to sign up than you are," Max said, walking back to his desk.

Zoey winced internally, if he only knew.

[ibelieveinahappilyeverafter]

Writing Commission - Where I Want To Be - Chapter Six

Summary: Yamada Hizashi, better known as the Voice Hero Present Mic, is a busy man. He has classes and students to teach English to, an agency that always seemed to be in the middle of a disaster to help deal with, and a radio station that was one bad show away from being cancelled to run. He doesn’t have time for a bad day triggered by nightmares and fears and anxieties that just never seem to stop.

Luckily for him, his partners are Aizawa Shouta and Yagi Toshinori and neither of those two are very good at leaving Hizashi to suffer alone.

Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia    

Relationship: Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic/Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic/Yagi Toshinori | All Might, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead/Yagi Toshinori | All Might

Characters: Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Yagi Toshinori | All Might

Rating: Teen Audiences

Word Count: 29,323

Transaction Amount: $200 (USD)

WARNINGS FOR: Past childhood abuse (both emotional and physical) and anxiety attacks verging on panic to PTSD episodes. Please read with caution if needed.

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                                         Chapter Index

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Staring down at his phone, Toshinori resisted the urge to bite the inside of his cheek -- again -- and instead typed out a quick message, ‘Are you CERTAIN this is the right agency?’ The response came near at once, a frowning little emoji that Toshinori could feel Shouta’s exasperation through. ‘I just want to be certain!’

‘It’s the right one. Go inside. Stop being weird.’ Damn Shouta and damn Toshinori himself for feeling nervous about stepping into a pro-hero agency. He was All Might, after all! His home might as well have been hero agencies in general! Except… he wasn’t All Might quite like that anymore. Now he was simply Yagi Toshinori, a nervous wreck bringing one of his partners something to eat since he had practically skipped lunch. 

Trying to text Shouta one more time, and getting no answer, Toshinori sighed and walked into the agency. He clutched tight at the bag that held the snacks and water he had carried with him, nervous as he edged his way inside before immediately being overtaken with, well, everything. 

The lobby of Hizashi’s agency was in complete and utter chaos, Toshinori not sure where he should look or who he should ask for directions as people ran in all directions. There was a mix of general staff, lawyers, managers, interns, sidekicks, and even the odd second-year or two trailing after an adult. 

Bright, searing color dominated the walls, a mix of color so intense that Toshinori had the urge to squint. The place was wild, fully of energy that surged through the air loud and clear with a heartbeat that was just full of life. It was an agency that suited Hizashi and Present Mic perfectly. It was also probably hell on the man, all things considered. Toshinori knew what an approaching sensory overload looked like, after all.

Distracted by a sea of calm over by the front desk where things seemed quieter and had some form of order to them, Toshinori carefully made his way over as he tried to keep his head down. He could already hear a few whispers, but, well, it wasn’t exactly easy to hide who he was anymore. 

Still, he made it to the front desk, clearing his throat lightly and patiently waiting until the woman running the desk could look up and give him her attention. Toshinori knew from experience that the secretary who ran the front desk of a hero agency was often the one who kept most day-to-day operations running. 

“Yes, how may I…” Ah. There was the recognition. Everyone in Japan knew what ‘All Might’ looked like now, and Toshinori did his best to put on a smile and wait for the possible spiel of oh my god you’re All Might oh my god what are you doing here can I get you autograph- “Good afternoon, sir. How may I help you today?” 

The woman’s tone was utter professionalism, eyes still a bit wide, but expression and tone controlled and even. It was enough of a surprise that Toshinori was rushing to explain and, he could admit, over explain, “Ah, well, you see, I’m actually here to see Present Mic! Or, er, Yamada-san, as it were. You see, we work together at U.A., and he didn’t quite eat much at lunch, so I thought I would bring in some small foods for him to eat. 

“Not that I don’t think he can’t take care of himself, of course! It’s just, well, if I’m being honest with you, while Yamada-san is incredible at caring for and helping others, he tends to neglect his own well-being. It’s doubtful he would remember to eat if we didn’t remind him -- plus, he’s so difficult. He works far too hard and he’s extremely hard on himself, and bringing in lunch is a good way to make sure the idiot hasn’t gone and drowned himself in a sea of paperwork or hung himself with a string of paper clips!”

Toshinori fell silent, wincing as the woman stared at him for a long, long moment before she was taking in a deep, steadying breath, and putting on the perfect smile, “Of course, sir. Let me contact Present Mic for you. It’s regulation that we contact the hero if any visitors arrive asking to meet them by name.” 

Mumbling his thanks, Toshinori decided that he would have to remember to bring a gift basket for the woman the next time he visited because he had no doubt she truly was the only thing keeping it all together. She was also exceptionally nice in pretending she hadn’t heard him mumble and fluster himself as badly as Young Midoriya. 

“Yamada-san?” The woman was already speaking into a phone, glancing up at All Might before she spoke again. “Yes, I was calling because… All Might is here to see you. He says he brought something to eat since you skipped lunch.” There was a beat of silence before there was a burst of crackling laughter that Toshinori heard even from how far away he was, the sound having him smile before he could try to resist. 

The secretary said a few more things before she was nodding, hanging up the phone with a simple, “Yes, Yamada-san.” She then grabbed a visitor’s badge and held it out for him. “Please wear this around your neck and keep it in sight at all times for security purposes. Yamada-san’s office is reached easily by taking the northwest elevator up to level six. His door is the fourth one on the right. May I help you with anything else today, sir?” 

Toshinori laughed, putting the badge around his neck before shaking his head, “Thank you, but no. Do let me know if you ever leave this agency and need another job, however.” 

“Thank you, sir, but part of the reason I’m here is out of fondness to not see my idiots burn the entire agency to the ground. If it weren’t for that reason, then no one, not even you, could afford me.” With that the woman gave a polite smile and returned to work, Toshinori pulling out his phone as he headed towards the correct elevator. ‘Would it be considered rude if I were to run Hizashi’s agency out of business and then steal both him and the wonderful young woman at the front desk?’

The answering text came back immediately, which meant Shouta had been ignoring him earlier. ‘Many have tried. All failed. Stop worrying.’ Toshinori clucked his tongue, shoving his phone away. For someone who supposedly ‘wasn’t in touch with his emotions,’ Shouta was surprisingly observant when it came to the emotions of others.

A smattering of whispers had Toshinori glancing up just enough to see he was definitely being stared at and recognized. Honestly, he should have brought a hat or a jacket to hide behind. Then again, knowing his luck and considering he was carrying a nondescript bag, if he had hidden his face everyone no doubt would have assumed he was a bomber. 

Some days, he despised the fact that the world now knew what he looked like. He could control the stares and the whispers when he was All Might, but… he wasn’t much All Might in that moment, really. Thankfully, he reached the right floor before his thoughts could spiral too deeply, Toshinori politely making his way out of the elevator before slumping in relief as no one got out with him. 

He was then treated to the sight of, standing in front of the fourth door on the right, an irritated Yamada Hizashi ‘yelling’ at two sidekicks that were looking more and more like scolded students by the second. Toshinori only laughed when he got close enough to hear what was going on, Hizashi throwing his hands up in the air as he hissed, “-do not get to make that call yourself and walk off! When you’re hurt you are to report to the nearest medical personal for help. You’re lucky it seems to be nothing more than a severely twisted ankle!” 

The injured one, who was using the other sidekick for support, sucked in a breath as if ready to fight back, “Present Mic, sir, the pain was barely present when I left the scene and I assumed I could just… walk it off.” The girl looked like she regretted the words as soon as they were out.

“Walk it off, huh?” Hizashi crossed his arms and raised his eyebrows, looking rather judgmental considering his own medical escapades. “And how, exactly, Shifter, is that working out for you?”

“To be honest, sir, it was going a lot better before you noticed I was limping,” Shifter replied, Hizashi’s lips twitching into a barely there smile before he was rolling his eyes. “Does this mean I’m benched?” 

The heartbroken tone showed the sidekick was still rather young, and Toshinori got to watch as Hizashi caved at once, “It means that you should get yourself to medical and get checked out. The sooner it’s healed, the sooner you get to do more work. Oracle, make sure she gets there.”

“Yes sir,” the other sidekick, Oracle, saluted before he was helping Shifter towards the elevator. Toshinori calmly walked past them, keeping to the shadows before he was at Hizashi’s side. There was a moment of silence, Toshinori finally laughing and shaking his head, “You're quite the hypocrite, aren’t you?” He had heard too many tales from Shouta and Hizashi both about the two of them skipping out on medical checks.

Hizashi’s response was to collapse backwards into his arms, Toshinori catching him with a startled laugh. There was then a dramatic, grief-filled groan that held too much pain to be fully passed off as dramatics. 

Remembering what Shouta had mentioned about Hizashi appreciating the quiet, but not silence, Toshinori distracted Hizashi with a kiss to his cheek before shuffling him back into the office. It wasn’t a surprise to see the lights were off with only a dim lamp lighting the room, papers strewn all over in some form of chaotic order known only to Hizashi himself. 

Kicking the door shut as quietly and carefully as he could, Toshinori leaned back against the sturdy wood and kept his arms low around Hizashi’s waist as the man turned around to curl in against him with a softer, more sincere sigh. Hizashi had always been eager to give and receive physical touch from others, but Toshinori wondered, after seeing him today, if it was more than just a personality trait. 

Shouta hadn’t told him the full story, but between what he had shared and Hizashi’s actions throughout the day it wasn’t hard to guess that the man had been muzzled when he was a child. It was something Toshinori had seen even when doing his patrols with his new time limit. People feared powerful quirks that could be used against them, and it was a small part of why All Might kept his smile. It was no doubt that same line of thinking that made Present Mic seem fun and upbeat and like he didn’t take anything seriously. 

Still, just because Toshinori had a good idea as to what pain Hizashi had been through, it didn’t mean he understood it. Physical pain, yes, that was something Toshinori understood far too well. He, of all people, knew what it was when one’s body betrayed them. Mental pain, however? Remnants of abuse that was as dangerous emotionally as it was physically? Yagi Toshinori nor All Might had ever dealt with that firsthand.

Soft touches seemed to help, Toshinori mused, one arm slung around Hizashi’s waist and the other rubbing circles against the man’s back. The stress and tension leaked out of him, but Toshinori was careful to avoid his head and neck. It didn’t take a genius to know that the last thing Hizashi needed on a bad day were touches to his neck and face. 

After a few minutes, Toshinori moved himself, Hizashi, and his protesting knees over to the small couch that was kept in the office. Toshinori made sure to tug Hizashi down with him before the man could get back to work, distracting him by handing him the bag of snacks and water he had brought. He then looped his arms around Hizashi’s waist and pulled until his back was snugly pressed up against Toshinori’s chest. 

The half-whispered grumble of complaint was enough to know Hizashi truly didn’t mind, instead putting up an argument just for argument’s sake. Toshinori hid a laugh, listening to their quiet breathing and the crinkling of plastic as Hizashi picked through the bag halfheartedly. Toshinori broke the silence, but he made sure not to break the quiet as he patted at Hizashi’s chest, getting his attention. 

As soon as he had it, he was signing out a simple, ‘How has your day been so far, sweetheart?’ Even if Hizashi was reading his signs backwards, he had a feeling the man knew sign language from front to back to upside down. He was proven right when Hizashi gave a little wiggle of his body, a sure sign of his pleasure, before signing back. 

‘Absolutely awful. I was about to jump out the window to escape before you arrived.’ The signs were careful and fluid, Hizashi no doubt knowing full well that Toshinori was still shaky with sign language sometimes even on a good day. ‘Quick question, though. Why are we using American Sign Language?’ 

Ah. Right. Toshinori cleared his throat, slightly embarrassed when he admitted, ‘I know the American Sign Language better than I do the Japanese Sign Language due to all the time I spent in America in my earlier years.’ 

‘Of course you do,’ Hizashi shot back, his smile as warm and soft as his tone no doubt would have been if he had spoken. ‘You should have told me sooner. I don’t have many people to practice with when it comes to ASL!’ 

‘A grievous error on my part. I assure you that such a mistake will never happen again.’ Toshinori watched Hizashi’s face scrunch up, eyes narrowing as he stared at Toshinori’s hands before signing again. 

‘Are you trying to use words you know I won’t have used as often?’ Weighing his options for a moment, Toshinori signed a simple yes. The huff of laughter was a reward all its own, Hizashi shaking his head as he finally pulled out a snack and began eating, chattering away in sign one-handed as he did so. 

Toshinori followed along, more paying attention to the fact that Hizashi was finally eating. It probably helped that the man’s support equipment was resting on his desk instead of tight around his neck like it usually was. If nothing else, it at least made it easier for him to eat something -- which Toshinori would not be bringing attention to. If he did then no doubt Hizashi would stop just to spite him.

Still, Toshinori made sure to keep the man relatively distracted as he worked his way through half the snacks and an entire bottle of water. It was enough that Toshinori was happy enough to not push when Hizashi set the bag down on the floor and settled more against him, throwing his legs up to rest on the other half of the couch. 

‘Hey, Toshi.’ Hizashi signed, along with tapping at one of Toshinori’s hands to fully get his attention. His own hands then fell still, Hizashi looking almost nervous before he tipped his head back to meet Toshinori’s gaze with his own. ‘How do you deal with your own bad days?’ 

Oh. Well, now. There was a question. Toshinori shifted Hizashi so he was looking back at his hands, signing out a quick, ‘Let me gather my thoughts for a moment.’ Hizashi nodded, looking content to wait as long as it took as Toshinori got himself together. He really was too lucky when it came to being able to share his life with Hizashi and Shouta. Still, he had been asked a question, and Toshinori would do his best to answer it. 

‘The best way I can begin to explain my bad days is that there was a Before and then there was an After.’ Before had been tolerable. His before had been nightmares and worries and fears, but he had managed to handle them. His after, on the other hand… ‘In the Before my bad days were about people I couldn’t save. Villains that had escaped and caused untold damage before I could stop them. Times I had failed as a hero…’

It had been the fears that all heroes shared, whether young or old. They all had nightmares of their failures, and it killed Toshinori to see so many young students and children getting ready to shoulder on that same burden. 

Forcing out a sigh, Toshinori looked down at Hizashi, who was watching Toshinori’s hands with rapt attention. Toshinori let himself give a bit of a smile before he continued, ‘In those Before days when I had a day I knew was going to be bad, it was as if the weight of the world was on my shoulders and I couldn’t dare bend under it -- not even for a moment.’ He had been All Might, after all. He had been the Number One Hero. 

Toshinori had heard the old story of Atlas who had been punished by being forced to hold up the sky. He knew that the story had changed over time and it was Atlas who held the world now, his burden increasing a thousand-fold. Toshinori had understood that story far too well; beginning with one heavy burden and then being given an impossible one. 

‘Then there came the After. After was… more difficult.’ After came following that fight, where he had almost managed to lose everything; his life, his quirk, his promise to Nana. ‘After… My bad days in the Before was what one would typically expect. Jumpy, irritable, anxious, trying to pretend everything was okay when it wasn’t. My bad days for the After I just try to survive.’ 

His After involved crawling through the day and struggling to so much as suck in a single breath, heart hammering and lungs screaming for air that would never come. It was trying to keep the world on his shoulders with his bones breaking with every single misstep he dared to take. His bad days in the After, he had realized, involved far, far too many missteps. 

‘My bad days are paranoia,’ Toshinori signed, grateful he had an excuse to not look at Hizashi’s face -- grateful he didn’t have to say any of what he was telling him out loud. ‘My bad days are me waking up and thinking that I didn’t win that fight. That HE is still out there, waiting and watching for my next mistake.’ He knew All For One was locked away and that it was finally over, but it never felt like it. 

‘It’s seeing Young Midoriya dead and suffering for all of my mistakes.’ Because he had been impatient and foolish and hadn’t stopped to realize that Midoriya Izuku, for all his skills and talents and heart, was still a child. ‘It’s seeing the ones I love dead and gone because I wasn’t strong enough to save them or even so much as try to help them.’ 

He had always seen his loved ones dead in his nightmares. It was impossible to be a hero and not see something like that, but it felt like it was only getting worse and worse as time went by. The more he made a home with where he was in life, the more terrified he was that one last misstep was all it would take to lose it. 

Raising his hands to start signing again, Toshinori instead jumped when his hands were grabbed, Hizashi lacing them together with his own before tilting his head back to look up at him. His voice was little more than a quiet whisper when he spoke, “It’s okay, Toshi.” 

Toshinori didn’t even try to fight the grip, instead letting his head drop forward to rest on Hizashi’s shoulder. He didn’t stop the weak, bitter laugh from escaping him, either. “Aren’t I supposed to be the one reassuring you?” 

“Not your fault. I just have a lot of practice in dealing with self-sacrificing idiots.” Hizashi shifted and twisted until he could place a soft kiss against Toshinori’s cheek. It was a little sad how stupidly fuzzy and happy that made Toshinori feel. “Thank you for telling me.” 

“For you, sweetheart, anything,” Toshinori swore, pulling Hizashi more against him and turning his head to gaze at the man quietly. Hizashi still looked worn and ragged and so, so tired, but there was a smile on his face. It was small, and subdued, and still so tired, but it was a smile. 

“You know,” Hizashi whispered softly, leaning in so his words were pressed against Toshinori’s cheek. “Maybe we could start helping each other through our bad days. What do you think?”

Toshinori sighed softly as love-stricken feelings washed through him, relaxing him further as he bundled Hizashi even closer and tilted the man’s head so he could give him a soft, lingering kiss. “Sweetheart, I think that sounds like a wonderful idea.” 

They were pro-heroes -- all three of them. They knew the risks and the dangers of what their lives and worlds entailed, but, Toshinori mused, it was nice to be reminded they were just people, too. 

Besides, curled around one of his hurting partners and being able to help soothe him, even just a little? He had never felt more like a hero than in that moment.

[leggomylino]

I saw someone else do one of these about a week ago, and it’s been on my mind to do one as well. It’s a very sweet gesture and I want to let all my mutuals know that not only do I see them and care about them, but I also really appreciate y’all as well! So without further ado, here’s my shoutout to each and every one of you! ->

@lovesickmark​ -> I’m pretty sure you’re like, the first person I really connected with on here? If not THE first then definitely one of the first. I know you’ve been going through a lot and I respect that; I’m cheering for you from the sidelines tho, just remember that! It’s been wonderful having you around so I hope you’re doing well and that you keep moving forward. <3

@jisungx2​ -> JOSIIIIIIIE >A< My INFP sister. I’m sure things have been kind of annoying and rough for you too, what with the holidays here and having to work Black Friday and most the rest of the season (holy cow I salute you and I’m really glad you didn’t die. Ily man.) It makes me so happy when you leave cute asks in my box like “hope you have a great day!” or “[enter cute chain mail here]”. You’re just very cute 😞😞 and I really wish you all the best this holiday season! I hope you’re taking care of yourself and remembering to take breaks when you need it. Remember the storage room excuse. Ily bro man.

@iiasha​ -> We haven’t been talking for very long but like, omgosh I love talking to you oops. 😂😅 Idk sis, I guess because most of my mutuals are a bit younger than me it’s nice to have someone who’s the same age I can relate to? And also someone to guide me through the confusing but quite entertaining world of the Seventeen fandom 💍 (I’m on my laptop and I couldn’t find the giant diamond emoji don’t @ me). ALSO! YOUR WRITING!! IS SO GOOD!!! Ugh I STILL gotta get to that Jimin alt. ending 😫😓 But I’ve been very invested in working and my language studies as of late while procrastinating on my other works rip. ANYWAY! I APPRECIATE YOU!! LET’S TALK MORE!!! YEEHAW!!!!

@joully​ -> You and I are still going to take over the kpop industry with our band, right? Shoot, what was the name of it again?? 😂😂 I don’t remember RIP...anyway, we don’t talk hardly as much but, I still see a lot of your posts and think about you! You’re really talented and I’m totally jelly of your piano skills 🥺🥺 Like dang I wish I could play half as good sis. Also, I’d really like to visit Germany one day! My dad’s best friend lives there, they met while he was travelling Europe in the army. He said we may go there one day and if we do, or if I just have to make my own adventure, I’d love to meet at a coffee shop and say hello. <3 Please continue taking care of yourself and come talk to me sometime! If you don’t, I will!! Lol 💕

@minniewoos​ -> 😎😎 <- SEE I REMEMBERED ❤️ I really hope your anatomy final went well! I bet it did <3 And if you haven’t taken it yet, you’re going to do great, I know! ^^ We haven’t talked for long but, I enjoy talking to you a lot. It’s always nice and appreciated to have another stay to bond with and just chat about how dumb boys can be but wow they sure are cute while doing it. Sigh. Anywho, I’m looking forward to talking with you more, and if you ever get a chance, I’m excited about getting to maybe study Korean together!  천천히 해 💓

@kpoptrashx2​ -> Luisa!!! We don’t really speak as often either 🤔 But I really appreciate that you’re always there to help me with my writing and give me pointers when I need it. Thank you so much for that! It’s truly very helpful because as a writer I have no idea how something is going to sound to others who have no idea what’s going on inside my head. ^^” Not only that but it’s a joy getting to chat with you as well. 💓 I hope you’re doing well and that we’ll get to catch up soon!

@hanniesunshine​ -> Omgosh sis I cannot wait for your story to come out! You know the one I’m talking about so I won’t accidentally spoil anything lol. But anyway! I hope you’re well and that you’re doing alright. We haven’t talked for very long but I had so much fun talking about your story with you, and I’m looking forward to chatting about even more stuff! 🥰

@bopping-to-my-kpop​ -> Sis you betta talk to me more or imma come after you 😤😤 Don’t test me I’ll dang sure hold another court case if I have to! And it’ll be totally rigged because I’ll be in charge of everything! The judge? It’s me. The jury? Also me~ Any outside opinions? I have influence in all of them! 💞 ...Nevertheless, I really hope that you’re well, and please know that you can come to me for anything :c Even if it’s just to take your mind off of something negative and you need a laugh. I’ll see what ridiculous shenanigans I can cook up for you, okay? You’re never a burden, I love helping people (esp. people I care about!) so please stop by anytime!! #westanemmainthishouse 🥀

@xxsanshinexx​ -> I haven’t talked to you in forever but I really hope you’re doing well! I haven’t seen many posts from you recently :(( Idk if you’re just busy or if I’m blind, but if you ever get a chance I’d love to catch up! Whatever you got going on please keep doing your best and remember to take your time as well. <3

@spuds-potato​ -> 🌟🌟🌟 B)) What’s poppin little sis? I hope you’re doing well as well, and I’m still waiting for my story 😤😤 Remember if Celi dies she’s dragging her bf down with her okay?! Okay. Some Romeo and Juliet action going on 😂😂 Aaaaaaanywho, I’ll have to pop in soon on Insta and you can tell me about your day! Remember boys are dumb and drink plenty of water~ 💗💗

@chanscoffee​ -> I know you’re super busy but I totally miss talking to you 😭😭 and I hope you’re well. I rarely use Snap but I need to hop on there sometime and maybe we can chat! Or on Insta. Idk we’ll see. Whatever you have going on just know I’m still supporting you and I’m here if ever you need someone. 💖

@daydream-jwoo​ -> Okay I’m telling you now imma be texting you soon! Seriously sis how have you been?! We have so much to catch up on! 😩😩 The holidays have managed to be both crazy and slow at the same time some how? Like time has been completely nonexistent and a total paradox lately. 🗿🗿 It’s wild. Anyway imma keep this one short bc it’s been so long and I’ll text you soon!! 💝💝

@thevampywarlock​ -> Give me a minute.........okay. *deep breath* AAAAH I THINK YOU’RE REALLY CUTE!?!?! ...Aaaaaanyway uwu” The stories you write are so cute and just, small wholesome things that you manage to extend and expand upon? Does that make sense? I really admire that. It’s like subtle but I definitely see it and eventually I’m going to come around to going on a reblogging spree \o7o/ But until then I hope you’ll consider stopping by and talking with me more? You’re a wonderful author and I think you have a kind heart. ^^ <3

@jisungsjheekies​ -> Oh sis. We gotta chat more too! Your stories are also very cute and well written and idk why but, I feel very compelled to support both you and @backhugsforhyunjin​ and whole squad. It’s very strange and I don’t mean to alarm anyone 😂😅 I just...can’t really explain it other than I feel like y’all are good people and I’d love to get to know you better. Anyway I’ll cut this short to avoid making anything unnecessarily weird, but, I’d really love to talk with you more! And I def support and appreciate you!!

@backhugsforhyunjin​ -> Sis you too, we def gotta chat more 😤 If you ever need anyone to talk to, I understand we aren’t close at all but I’m available to listen or give advice if you need it? 😅 Also, you’re a wonderful author as well. I really wish the best for you and hope to hear from you more in the future. If anything, please remember to take your time and know that there are people cheering for you! You got this, whatever it may be!!

@gaiyofanfiction​ -> Asdfghjkl now that we’re buds ofc I had to make you a part of this too 🤪🥳 I think we could use a team name, what do you think about #TurkeyDragons?  Bc the NCT float?? 😂😂 I like it honestly...but if you hate it lmk lmao. I hope we get to talk more soon and I’m really looking forward to an update of Twisted Karnival! One of the greatest fanfics I’ve ever read on here 😞✊ Of course with the Holiday season here updating isn’t super important, y’all pls take care of yourselves first and I hope you have a wonderful holiday season! (p.s. if anyone else is reading I wish this for y’all as well!) ❤️🎄

~~~

. . . That was a lot. If I’ve forgotten anyone I sincerely apologize and I love and appreciate you as well! Please don’t be mad at me 😩😩 At the end of the day I really do love and appreciate all my followers and mutuals, y’all are all fantastic and I’m always rooting and cheering for you like the Mom in every Pokemon rpg ;-;-;-; Keep going and become the Pokemon Champion okay? And I mean really go kick Gary’s ass, because he’s an ass and needs his ass whooped after all the crap he puts you through in Red/Green. I can’t wait for a reboot to come up on Switch so I can kick his butt all over again 😤🤭🥴 Anyway x9,000, thanks for coming to my Appreciation Ted Talks and I sincerely hope you all have a wonderful day and rest of 2019, as well as a happy New Year and an amazing 2020! ...Dear son of a biscuit it’s gonna be 2020. Wow. Letting that sink in. Where’s the rewind button? Actually I’m not sure if I wanna go back maybe it’s best if we bury this year for the most part and start over 👀💧

OKAY THAT BEING SAID EVERYONE GO OUT AND TAKE DOWN GARY!!! ILY ALL WOO 화이팅!! LET’S GET THIS 2020 BREAD after a cup of eggnog and some holiday celebrations uwu Peace out and again I love y’all! 💝

[scaredofthebasement-blog]

When Love Walks In - Chpt 21

Chpt 21 – Auston gets his catheter removed, eats and stands up.  Dr Quinn breaks down.

Words 5414  (Long Chapter but Good One!)

Auston quickly erases his writing board as he sees Dr Quinn approach the foot of his bed.

“Well hello there, Alex. Are you going to hang around for the procedures?”  Dr Quinn asks.

“Hi, Dr Quinn. Yeah.  I thought I would”, Alex answers.

“Great!  And, hello to you Auston!  I just heard from Jacqui, that you had a choking episode this morning. You okay now?”  She looks at Auston with a concerned and caring expression.

Auston smiles and nods yes.

“I’m glad.  I understand you got upset about something. If you’d like we can discuss it later during our chat at one o’clock”, Dr Quinn suggests.  

Alex and Auston look at each other and smile, knowing they are thinking the same thing, Thanks but that can’t happen cause it was about you.

Dr Quinn observes the exchange.  Feeling like an outsider on an inside joke, she asks, “What?   Is there something I should know?”

Alex plots, “No.  I’d been working on sorting through Auston’s text messages, and I let him know that two women he has dated have been texting him wanting to get back together with him.  We were discussing that issue.  But it’s all good now.”  Alex turns to Auston, who looks confused.  She winks without Dr Quinn seeing.

Auston catches on to what Alex is doing and isn’t happy about it.  Frig!  If Quinn thinks I’m going back with some other woman, she’ll charge full steam ahead for McDreamy!  Not smart Alex!

Dr Quinn is surprised that her body has reacted to this news.  Her stomach sinks at the thought of Auston’s attention going to another woman. Her blood runs cold for a few seconds as an image of him having fun with someone else flashes across her mind. She relishes Auston’s attention. She gets butterflies when she wakes in the morning, knowing she’ll get to see him;  see him smile at her; watch his face light up when he sees her enter his room; watch him make silly faces at her;  witness him teasing her.  She feels better when she’s around him; like a flower receiving sunlight.  If she’s honest with herself, she’s very attracted to him and enjoys his personality.  He’s very charming.  But she can’t be honest with herself, so she’s been distracting herself when these thoughts cross her mind.  She’s starting to recognize that these thoughts are not as easy to block as they were earlier on.  As each day passes, they are getting stronger.  In fact, her body has got into the act now by reacting, and that is even more difficult to assuage.

“Okay.  Well, I’m glad to hear”, Dr Quinn lies trying to push past her jealous thoughts.

What does ‘all good now’ even mean?  She asks herself.  Is he going to be seeing someone now?  Is he taken now?  Shit!  No!  Stop it, Quinn!  You can’t even date him.  He’s your patient!  Plus you’re dating Scott!  So stop it! Now!

“I managed my congestion. It was close, but I didn’t need suctioning!”  Auston writes, proud of himself.

After waiting a moment for Quinn’s response, Auston motions to Alex for her reaction to the fact that Dr Quinn is staring off in a daze.

Alex smiles at Auston, confirming she sees it too.  

If Alex’s ploy was successful then she’s probably wondering if I’m committed to another woman, Auston thinks.  If so, how’s she going to react?

Alex pulls Dr Quinn from her trance by calling for her attention, “Dr Quinn?”

“Ah…Yeah?  Yes?”  Dr Quinn startles, looking up at Alex.

“Auston wrote something on his board for you to read.”

Dr Quinn reads it and responds, “Oh, yes.  I heard that you did that Auston. Very glad to hear, especially so early in the week.  Good job, Auston!”

Neither Auston or Alex know how to read Dr Quinn’s take on the situation.

Nurse Jacqui and Nancy, another nurse, enter the room.

As Jacqui pulls the curtains to surround Auston’s bed, Dr Quinn announces, “Oh, Auston and Alex, you, of course, know Jacqui, but you haven’t yet met Nancy.  Nancy is a nurse that specializes in catheters.  She’s going to be removing yours with Jacqui as a chaperone, for lack of a better term.  A local numbing agent will be used so you shouldn’t feel any pain.  As Dr Quinn is speaking she realizes Auston is just remembering that these two women are going to have to look and touch his penis to do the procedure.”

Alex and Auston nod their hellos to Nancy.  Auston looks mortified.

Not wanting to watch Auston get any more uncomfortable than he already is, Dr Quinn announces, “Alex, how about you and I step outside the curtain and give Auston some privacy.” 

Dr Quinn can barely stop herself from smiling or stifle her laughter as she glances up to wave goodbye to Auston and sees him mouth ‘Help!’ to her as she starts to walk through to the other side of the curtain.

“You don’t have to ask me twice.  Yuck!” Alex gags as she also pushes hastily through to the outside of the curtain.  Dr Quinn and Alex walk over to look out of Auston’s window to the traffic and people below, coming and going about their business.  Both women are trying to compose themselves quietly after witnessing Auston’s amusing look of terror.

Once Auston’s catheter is removed, Jacqui pulls the curtains open and explains to Auston what he can expect and asks for him to let the staff know if he encounters any pain, discomfort or blood in the next few days.  She tells him that he will now be using the washroom or pee container, so he is to let the nurses on duty know if he needs them to help him get to the washroom by pressing his buzzer.

Jacqui and Nancy both leave the room to wash up.

Dr Quinn and Alex walk meekly to Auston’s bedside and can barely contain themselves as Auston looks at them with a horrified face.

“I trust all went well, Auston”,  Dr Quinn braves the question, smiling.

Auston stares at Quinn with his mouth hanging ajar.  Then he mouths, ‘wow’ followed by ‘fuck!’  Then he grabs his board and writes “You’re both dead to me!” and adds an emoji giving the eff u salute.

Dr Quinn mouths back ‘sorry, so sorry’.  But Auston can tell by her restrained smile that she’s clearly enjoying his embarrassment.

When Auston looks at Alex she pleads, “Hey!  I had nothing to do with it!”

Jacqui and Nancy return, ready for the next procedure.  

“Okay, Thank you, Nancy and Jacqui.  Are you going to remove Auston’s intravenous line while you’re here?  If you have to go, Nancy, I can do it with Jacqui.”

“I’m happy to do it”, Nancy says as she and Jacqui attend to removing the intravenous line from Auston’s arm.

“Bet you’re glad to have those things out, Auston?”  Alex asks, trying to cheer Auston.

Auston ignores Alex. Once the intravenous line is out, he mouths “thank you” to both nurses.

“Pleasure” they both respond as they tidy up and leave Dr Quinn and Alex alone with Auston.

When Dr Quinn and Alex know that the nurses are out of earshot, they burst out laughing into their arms trying to be quiet.

“Wow!”  “Simply Wow!”  Auston writes on his board which makes the women laugh even more.

Dr Quinn gets herself together and cheers, trying to be professional, “Great job, Auston! Those two things removed are significant steps!”  

“Yeah, it feels great!” Auston writes, with a serious face.

“Really?”  Dr Quinn asks, surprised.

“No!  My ‘yoo hoo’ is burning!  … Whoops...Sorry”,  Auston writes blushing and smirking.

“OMG!  Auston!  Oh, hell! I’m already scarred for life after sorting through your cell phone, so whatever.”

Dr Quinn laughs at Alex and Auston.  “Brothers are fun, aren’t they Alex?”

“Oh yeah.  I told Auston I’m retiring from being his sister, but he won’t accept my letter of resignation.”

They both look at Auston as he writes, “Hey!  Have some sympathy for the poor guy in the hospital bed with a sore Willie, will ya!” He adds a drawing of one sad and one pained emoji.

“Augh!!!”  Alex gasps upon seeing the emoji.

“Oh, dear!  Here we go again.”  Dr Quinn shakes her head trying not to laugh at the ridiculous images. “Auston!”  She scolds in fun.

“Do you have siblings, Dr Quinn?”  Alex asks.

“Yes, I have an older brother.  So I know your pain, Alex.  They’re gross aren’t they?”  Dr Quinn teases.

“Hey!  Yoo Hoo!  I’m sitting right here, ya know!  I might not be able to talk, but I can hear perfectly fine!” Auston writes, pretending to be offended.  He draws an emoji waving.

Dr Quinn and Alex laugh at Auston and his emoji.

“Oh Auston, you’re such a goof!  We need to get some water in you to get your system flushed out.  The Speech Therapist should be here in a few minutes to do that”, Dr Quinn tells him with affection in her voice.

“If you feel burning, I can have Jacqui put some more numbing …”  Dr Quinn can’t even get out her whole sentence before Auston writes, “Noooo Thank You!”

Dr Quinn and Alex start laughing again.

“You sure about tha…?” Dr Quinn asks teasing.

“Yessssssss!  Very sure.”  Auston writes, smiling back.

“Can you please be so kind as to give me the heads up if anyone else needs to look at my penis today?” Auston writes.

Dr Quinn laughs.  “Auston, how did you think they were going to remove your catheter?  Without anyone seeing or touching you?”  Dr Quinn playfully challenges.

“Yeah, did you think they were just going to pull it out from behind a sheet?  Like a magician?”  Alex chimes.

Auston writes, huffing, “Yeah, Alex cause everyone’s seen, catheter magicians! No!  I just got mixed up.  I confused a catheter with an intravenous.  All I’ve been thinking about today is getting to eat real food again. So sue me!”

Alex jumps in dryly, “Well let's just be glad you’re not the doctor then, cause imagine Auston putting an intravenous in a patient’s penis to feed them?!”

“Oh my goodness, Alex!  Stop!  I’m gonna bust a gut!” Dr Quinn begs.

“Or imagine Auston placing a catheter in a patient’s arm to get urine!”  Alex can’t help herself.

Auston puts on his glasses and draws an emoji with glasses and buck teeth to push Dr Quinn further over the edge.

Dr Quinn sees Auston’s now wearing his glasses and then she notices his emoji.  She thinks he’s drawn a take on himself as a geeky doctor who doesn't know the difference between a catheter and an intravenous and she’s losing it over by the window where she’s trying to get a grip on herself.  

Auston and Alex see Dr Quinn’s shoulders going up and down, and it’s making them hysterical.  Auston has tears rolling down his face just watching her.

Auston loves how Quinn reacts to him when he’s silly.  She’s so cute.  He wishes he could pull her to his lap and tickle her.

Melanie, the Speech Therapist, enters the room with a cart of supplies.  She introduces herself to Auston and Alex and then says hello to Dr Quinn. They all take a moment to compose themselves as Dr Quinn explains that they were just laughing about something silly.

Melanie takes a few minutes to explain what Auston should expect as he re-starts eating and asks him how he’s feeling.

“Looking forward to eating real food again.  Bring on the steak!”,  Auston jokes.

“Ha!  Sorry.  It’s far from steak my friend.  But glad to see you have an appetite because many patients lose their appetite after being on intravenous for a while. We’ll have you start off slow with small amounts of blended and pureed foods. We’ll get you practicing swallowing; get your coordination back. But first I need to deflate the cuff of your breathing tube and suction the tube before eating or drinking”, Melanie explains as she preps.

Auston motions to Alex for her to watch the procedure closely.

“Oh, is Alex going to be staying at home with you?”  Dr Quinn asks.

“Probably”, Alex answers.

“Okay, so yes, you should watch and ask questions if you have any.”

Melanie completes the cuff deflation and suction.

“Okay, so now we need to have you sit up nice and tall.”

Once Auston is sitting up straight, he is given a cup of water with a straw and instructed to take small sips and swallow them.

After he manages to consume some water, he is given a small protein shake to drink.

He has no trouble getting both down.

“Well, you did great, Auston”, Melanie and Dr Quinn tell him.

Melanie informs Auston that he should drink water throughout the day.  She says she’ll leave the cart with the cooler in the room, in case he gets hungry, and Dr Quinn or the nurse can supervise his drinking and in-between meal sessions. She’ll be back for Auston’s dinnertime meal around 530pm and excuses herself.

Dr Quinn tells Auston, “Well after all that excitement, you can now have a bit of time to relax. Maybe take a quick nap.  Jacqui will come and stay with you to make sure you’re okay over the next half hour.  Alex and I will grab a quick bite to eat, and I’ll update her on what she missed this morning.  We’ll see you at 1230 when Jack gets here for your Physio.  Gonna try to get you standing up.  Oh, and I promise, no one else will be looking at your penis today Auston”, She winks at him and walks out of the room followed by Alex who is laughing her ass off.

Auston shakes his head laughing to himself.  Despite, or maybe because of, (lol), having his penis touched and looked at by two nurses today, Auston is having the best day.  He can’t remember having felt as much joy as he has this morning, ever in his life.  Sure he’s laughed insanely with friends and family, won awards, achieved goals he dreamed of, had incredible moments on the ice, but never has he done anything that brought him such joy while being able to share it with the love of his life. Not until today.

My god, I hope this is a sign of things to come.  If just laughing inanely at dumb things with Quinn brings me this much happiness then imagine sharing other things with her; like making love!  Auston contemplates.

Nurse Jacqui comes in Auston’s room, explains that she’ll let him rest while she reads in a chair off in the corner until he needs to get up at 1230 for his Physio session.

Auston puts on his earbuds and listens to music as he daydreams about how he would love Quinn if and when he ever gets the chance.  It involves a whole lot of tearing off her clothes.  He drifts off to sleep with a smile on his face.

It’s 1230 when Alex and Dr Quinn return to Auston’s room after their quick lunch and briefing. It’s time for Physio, but Auston is asleep.  Dr Quinn walks to Auston’s bedside and lifts his left wrist into her hand and holds it to stir him with the temperature change.  She can’t ignore that it feels incredible to touch him. She savours the tingles that spread all over her body.

Auston isn’t waking up so, Dr Quinn removes his earbuds and whispers quietly to him, “Aussssstoooonnnn ….wake up. Time to wake uuup.”

Alex is smiling to herself, thinking how happy Auston is going to be, waking up to Dr Quinn’s face and gentle voice.

A groggy Auston hears a voice calling out to him from what seems far away.  He slowly comes out of his slumber and realizes whose voice is calling him and that it is nearby.  He smiles before he even opens his eyes.

Dr Quinn sees Auston’s smile and melts a little inside.  He’s so sweet; she thinks as she continues to hold his wrist.

“Hey, Sleepyhead! Wake up!”  She whisper-yells, looking down on him smiling, eyes adoring.

Auston is finally able to open his heavy eyes.  His eyes lock immediately on Dr Quinns; his heart pounds at the sight of her and the realization that she is touching him.  Her hand is warm and electric.  His eyes slide from her eyes to her hand, and then to her lips as she speaks to him. He can’t hear what she’s saying. He’s lost in his thoughts and the urge to pull her to him and crash his lips on hers, his mouth consuming hers in a frenzy.  Is she mine yet?  Can I do that? No! She’s not!  Not yet!  Whoa! He yells at himself.

Dr Quinn lets Auston’s wrist gently slip out of her hand.  “There he is!  Hey!  Hi ‘Bam Bam’!  Sorry to have to wake you but it’s almost time for your Physio.  Jack will be here in a minute.  Can I get you to elevate the head of your bed while you wake up?”

Now that Quinn’s warm hand has let him go, Auston feels his wrist go cold, and he yearns for her touch. He longs for the day when he can hold her hand for as long as he wants.  Auston imagines kissing the top of her hand and caressing it with his thumb, writing messages of love on her palm with his finger, intertwining his fingers slowly with hers; feeling the warmth and softness, sliding in and out of them, neither knowing where one ends and the other begins.

Now, all he can do is take the remote from Dr Quinn and sit himself up. Patience…. patience… patience, he tells himself.

Jack, the Physiotherapist, enters and greets all in the room.  He introduces himself to Alex, who he has never met before.

Before long, Jack has warmed up Auston by putting him through their usual routine stretches. It’s now time to get Auston standing up by himself.  With the help of a walker, Auston is on his feet outside of his bed.  He stands for as long as he can before sitting back down in a chair.  Taking a break in the chair, Dr Quinn gives Auston some water to sip and some pureed food to eat. He swallows both successfully.

After a half-hour of Auston standing up, sitting down, drinking, swallowing food and making his way to the washroom to pee, he is done with Physio and back in bed.

It’s 1 pm.  Alex has left and will return around 530pm.  Dr Quinn and Auston are alone at last for their ‘Friend-Therapy.’

“Where did you get it?” Auston writes, casting his eyes toward the window sill as Dr Quinn settles into her chair next to his bedside.

“Whaa?”  Dr Quinn asks, confused.

“The tiny stick.  By the way, it made me smile.  Very funny!”  He writes and smiles.

“Oh!  Yeah!  Ha! The stick for ‘Auston Cact-thews’. Well, I thought he should have a stick. How else is ‘Auston Cact-thews’ going to be able to get back to playing hockey if he doesn’t have a stick?”  Dr Quinn jokes.

“Ha!  Yes.  Of course. And he loves his new stick.  Where did you get it?”  Auston asks.

“I was shopping for a Lego kit for my nephew, Grayson, for his birthday last week and noticed a small pack which had a hockey player and a stick.  It reminded me of you, and I thought you might like it. I figured it would be funny to just put the stick with the cactus and let you discover it in your own time”, Dr Quinn explains.

“So great!  Thank you!  Very funny!  And I love that you named him!”  Auston writes gushing.

“Oh, I didn’t name him.  That was his name.  He told me”, Dr Quinn tells him.

“Oh, so he talks?” Auston plays along.

“Yes, have you not heard him?”

“Nope.  Has he told you anything else?”

“He has.”

“What?”

“He told me he’s very impressed with you and your recovery.  He knows you’ll be playing in the NHL again.”

“Is that right?  What did you say?”

“I told him I agree 100%.”

“Oh, really.  Why is that?”

“For three reasons:  

(A) Cause you got me intrigued about how good you are at hockey, so I have to watch you play hockey for my home team;  

(2)  For years and years, I was buried in books and studies preparing to save you and had no time to go to a Leafs’ game and see you play, so essentially you owe me;  And

(D) You’re a Goof, and you owe me for putting up with your goofiness.  Exhibit A:  ‘Friend-Therapy’ Inventor.”

“Ha!  Is that right?  BTW, I love how you count”,  Auston writes with a smirk and wink.

“Ha!  Thanks, I learned that from Home Alone, one of my favorite movies.  And yes, that is one of my hopes for you and me, anyway.  Another is your voice”, Dr Quinn tells him.

“Well, I’ll keep that in mind.  They’re my hopes too”,  He says winking.

“Good!  I’m expecting big things from you.” She says playfully.

“Then I better not let you down. Geesh!”  He laughs.

“Neither will I, Auston. I will do everything I can to help you get there.  I wish someone could have done the same for Josh.”

“If you don’t mind talking about Josh, I’d like to know a bit more about him if that’s okay?” Auston writes.

“Sure, Auston.  But may I ask, Why?”

“He seems to have had a huge impact on you.  Your feelings for him were so strong that they led you here, to me.  Because of your feelings for him, you were able to save me and be here for me.  I want to know about him.  What made him so special to you?”  Auston explains.

“I see.  Well, Josh was my first, and as it turns out, only love.”

“Really?  But you’ve dated other guys right?”  Auston asks.

“Yes.  Sure.  But I never loved anyone like I loved Josh.  I think I always compared them to him, and they didn’t stand a chance since he could do no wrong.  In my 17-year-old brain, he was ‘the one’, and I lost him… ‘my one’.”

“What was it that you loved so much about him?”

“Well, he was everything I could have ever wanted in a boyfriend.  I was 16 at the time I met him, and he was 17.  We went to the same high school.  I first noticed him when he performed in a school assembly.  He was funny as hell.  He and his best friend were insanely talented performers; like SNL funny.  In grades eleven and twelve, they put together skits and performed them for our school assemblies.  They would have everyone rolling on the floor laughing.  They made fun of school stuff; you know, relatable stuff.  They were clever in the way they made you see the lighter side of things.  

Josh was also the Quarterback of the school’s football team.  He was up for a scholarship at an American University but needed to get his grade up in math.  I had skipped a grade, so I was in his grade 12 class.  He asked me if I would tutor him.  I jumped at the chance.”

“Not surprised that you skipped a grade.  You’re a Brainiac!”  Auston interjects.

“Thank you, Auston. Oh my goodness, Auston, he and I had so many laughs.  He was always making fun of himself and the mistakes he would make doing math.  We started dating about three weeks into tutoring.”  Dr Quinn is enjoying telling her story about Josh.  Her eyes are dancing, and her face is full of expression.

“Sounds romantic.”  Auston comments.  He loves seeing Quinn so happy.  It reminds him of when he made her so happy earlier.

“Yes.  It was very exciting for sure.  But he had a daredevil side to him as well.  He wasn’t afraid of anything.  He was always looking for a challenge.  And because of that, he is dead”,  Dr Quinn says with emotion caught in her voice.

“I’m so sorry”, Auston writes with sincere sympathy in his eyes.  He can’t stand to see her hurting.  Auston wants to hold her in his arms and tell her that he loves her.  He wants to reassure her that he’ll be what she hoped Josh would be for her.  But he knows he can’t.  Not yet, anyway.

“Thank you.  We only dated for a few months before Josh died, so I was still in the head over heels stage.  It’s extremely difficult to move on with any part of your life when you lose who you believe to be the love of your life, someone you can only remember as being perfect for you.  Josh was the only reason I was able to move on with a career; cause I made it about him”, Dr Quinn explains.

“I get that.”

“How about you Auston? Have you been in love?”

“I thought I was a few times.  But I look back now and see it was just horny infatuation.  Excuse the term”, Auston writes.

“Oh yeah?”  She laughs.  “I’m getting used to your invented terms.”

“Ha! Good.  Since being in the NHL, I’ve needed to have my guard up to protect myself from being used.  At the same time, I understood that it wouldn’t have been fair to ask any woman to enter into a serious relationship with me since I needed to be selfish with my time, to achieve my career goals.  It’s been hard not having a steady girlfriend when most of my teammates have one.  But for me, personally, I could only see problems in having one.  So I just dated casually; some a little longer than others.”

“I see.”

“Well, it kind of backfired in that I have developed a bit of a reputation for being a ‘ladies man’ or ‘playboy’ so to speak”,  Auston feels the need to explain in case she finds out.

“I see.  So you’ve had some backlash?”

“Oh yeah.  I’ve had to put out a few fires to protect my reputation.”

“Did you always let these women know you weren’t in it for keeps?”

“I tried, but all women are different.  Some were fine with it, especially the women who were like me, busy travelling with their careers.  But some led me to believe they were okay with it, appeared busy with their careers, but in the end, they weren’t content with the arrangement and wanted more.  It was difficult for me to tell who was going to be okay with it and who wasn’t.  Also, there were some who I believe were initially only in it for the fun of it, but apparently got swept up in it.  Oh lord, the stories I could tell would fill a book.”

“Oh, is that what you were upset about this morning with Alex?”  Dr Quinn asks.

“Yes, but I really don’t want to discuss it.  It’s being dealt with,”  Auston explains as he watches Dr Quinn closely to see if she is relieved that these women are not going to be part of his life.

Dr Quinn knows Auston is watching her, but her smile betrays her.  She is thrilled that these women mean nothing more to him than fun.

Auston feels hopeful, witnessing her smile.  All I need now is to get past Dr McDreamy, he thinks.

“Well, I’m glad to hear it’s being dealt with as I’m sure that can be very stressful. I hope it all goes smoothly for you.  But since you haven’t achieved your ultimate goal, I suspect you might have a few more fires to put out?”  She asks, trying to get an idea of Auston’s plans for his future.

“You mean Stanley?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh look at you, using hockey lingo!”

Dr Quinn laughs.

“No I haven’t achieved my ‘ultimate career goal’ yet, but since my accident, I have changed and reevaluated.  I have a new ‘ultimate life goal’ that is going to take priority.  I want to be in a committed relationship with someone I love deeply.  What’s most important to me now is having someone in my life who I’m in love with and can share everything.  I imagine that my career successes will feel so much better when I have someone to share them with.”

“Your family shares in your success?”

“Yes, but it is different to share success with your family versus someone you’re in love with.  Don’t get me wrong; it would kill me not to be able to share my success with my family.  They have been with me from the start, they’ve seen the struggle and have shared in all the highs and lows; they also sacrificed for me to achieve success. But at the end of the day, when I win the Stanley Cup, I want to be able to go home with the woman of my dreams who loves me deeply; someone I can share the joy.”

“Wow, Auston.  You’re making me tear up.  I want that for you too”,  Dr Quinn says trying to push away the wish that it could be her.

“Thank you, and I want you to have someone to share your success and joy with too Dr Q”,  Auston writes, wishing he could add that he wants that person to be him.

“Wow!  Well, thank you, Auston.  I want that for me too.” She laughs.

“I agree with you, Auston. It’s very special to share success with family, but it sure would be intimate and less lonely to share it with someone you love deeply”,  Dr Quinn tells him dreamily.

“Do you think you’ll find that with Dr Peters?”  Auston pries.

“Time will tell”, Dr Quinn lies.  Deep down she wants to say no.  She starts to feel sick just thinking about how much she wants to tell Auston that she wants him. This is so hard.  I can’t do this anymore.  I need to leave. I have to get out of here,  She tells herself.

Auston notices something has changed in Quinn.  He watches her closely as she stands up to walk around the room.

“I’m so sorry Auston. I suddenly feel sick.  I need to leave our session early.  Please forgive me.  I need to go home”,  Dr Quinn tells him as she tries to catch her breath and goes pale.

What the hell?!  Come here! Let me see you!  Auston wants to yell to her but he can’t talk.  So he moves to sit with his legs over the side of the bed. He’s going to walk to her so he can check on her and comfort her.

Dr Quinn looks up and sees Auston trying to stand up.

“What?!  Auston!  What are you doing?”  She calls out as she rushes to him.

As soon as Dr Quinn is within arms reach of Auston he grabs her arm and sits back down on the edge of the bed.  He pulls her to him.  He slides his arms around her waist and buries the side of his face into her stomach. He knows he shouldn’t, but he can’t stop himself.  He feels like he’s died and gone to heaven as he holds her and inhales her.

Dr Quinn is in shock. She slowly and instinctively puts her arms around Auston’s shoulders and holds him tight.  When she realizes what is happening, she pulls away and places both hands on Auston’s cheeks and crouches down to be face to face with him.

Looking him directly in the eyes she cries, “I can’t Auston!  I’m so sorry!  I just can’t!”  She kisses his forehead and says, “I have to go now.  I promise I’ll come see you tomorrow.  I don’t feel well, but I’ll be okay.  You’re wonderful Auston! Simply Wonderful!  But I must leave right now.”

Auston has hold of her hands that rest on his cheeks.  As she slides her hands away from his face to leave, he tries to hold them for as long as possible. She keeps pulling.  He sees her face is red and wet with tears.  It’s killing him to let her go, but he has no choice.  When she begs “please”, he releases her.