#i know I don't have the strongest faith but at least I'll admit it

[abyssalcitrus]

I asked my mom if I could stay home to work on her present and naturally she automatically starts saying I have weak faith and am in dangerous territory and basically I'm a godless heathen and this is exactly why I don't talk to her about my faith (or lack thereof, I guess)

[alevolpe]

❤️, 🔻 luna and artemis?

I'll premise by saying that I don't really ship Artemis and Luna, despite liking both of them a lot and their bantery relationship, it wouldn't feel very organic for me to do a jointed hc.

Luna ♥ - family headcanon

Unlike the reincarnations of the senshi, I do believe that both Luna and Artemis share a very similar persona as their SilMil selves.

For Luna her devotion to family and duty is one of her strongest attributes. She was chosen early on as a caretaker for many children that were to grow up into soldiers for the Queen and the main ambassador of Serenity. She knew it wasn't a merciful faith, to be born a senshi that is, so she chose to dedicate her life to giving many of them as good a life as she could possibly offer.

Even after death, the love persisted, although it was not the love for the previous soldiers she cared so much for. No, she never regained any memory of her previous life. It was the love of a dedicated mentor, a friend and a mother.

She's very much a mother figure for the team she was assigned to, but especially for Usagi, Ami and Rei. Her family and her duty. Swallowing the guilt, she looks on lovingly and admires how far they've gone. She wouldn't have it any other way.

Luna ▼ - childhood headcanon

I think SilMil Luna had a pretty unremarkable childhood. Despite being born in a wealthy and powerful family, she was never blind to the hardships lower class citizens had to endure every day. She'd pass by slums and decaying merchant tables everyday, everyday she witnessed the inequity the Moon Kingdom had caused.

Her first time on the Moon she was left astonished. Even living in one of the wealthiest sections of her region, she never had seen such haunting perfection. No stone out of place beneath her feet, not a section of the road left unlit, not a wandering thought in the guards' eyes, no dark corner hiding the mistakes of their society.

Despite only humans walking among her, nothing ever felt more estranged from the concept of humanity. Luna never felt more terrified.

Artemis ♥ - family headcanon

Luna struggles a lot with separating family and duty. She knows that given her situation, the two must collide at times, but I see Artemis being at peace with the idea that the two can be one and the same.

He retains all his memories from his past life, he's aware that the people he loves and cares for are here for a reason, a reason beyond being there for him. It's bigger than him, than any of them.

This is prob my wildest hc and it might change with my narrative moving forward, but for the time being I see Artemis as one of Queen Serenity's sons.

Unlike Priness Serenity, who I hc as very self-centered and almost uncaring to those she deems will not give her attention, Artemis did love his mother. He was not blind to her faults, but he could truly see the suffering the Crystal was putting on her, a corrupting force slowly fracturing an already broken will. He believed in his mother's ideals of an utilitarian society, although he knew the approach was a far cry from what it should have been. Serenity wasn't human. She could never understand they lacked the ability to peacefully maintain such order.

After his death he had a lot to reflect on. He wasn't angry. He understood that ultimately he was just a tool. He wasn't meant to live as long as them, but why a cat? Was it a punishment? Left to live only long enough to guide them to the right path, but not long enough to let him witness their future. Luna was a traitor, as so her punishment was clear, but for him it felt even crueler. Left with the memories of what was and the inability to see what will be.

He chose to believe the Crystal had chosen his destiny. That it wasn't her. That despite what she had become, at least some of her smiles were the token of a mother's genuine love.

Artemis ▼ - childhood headcanon

Gotta admit I haven't thought much about either Artemis' or Serenity's childhood or what type of mother Queen would have been to them, but I know for sure that she didn't treat them equally.

Not saying one was neglected or tortured or anything like that, but she definitely knew that a man couldn't be the next in line for the throne, so she couldn't dedicate the same amount and type of attention to him as she did to Serenity.

He saw his mother as very loving, despite her being rarely if ever openly affectionate, especially as the years went on. He grew ever so hesitant to bother her, all his questions about life left unspoken, his needs and interests always taking backstage when in her presence.

Despite the two emotionally growing more and more distant, as he grew into a bright and diligent young man, he never left his mother's side. Eventually earning a place as one of her trusted advisors.

P.S. sorry it took me so long to answer this. I genuinely don't have an excuse.

[hel-phoenyx]

I'll have to admit that it has been a while since the last time I saw my mother like this.

Under the eternal day of the Gaikamshigtai lands, where no warrior ever finds solace, we decided to take a break waiting for the next fight in the Tournament for Glory. This year apparently, there is quite a number of good candidates, rumors even go around about the young king of the Kraken Coast as the one who finally has a chance of winning against War herself for the first time since she ascended ; but I pay no attention to those rumors, because I know her strenght better than anyone, having felt it restrain itself in tenderness against my very skin.

Still, I think that if anyone has a chance to go far enough, it will be the woman sitting in front of me. Her hair is greying the more years are passing, and in her right eye a cataract is beginning to form, but she still holds the strenght of her forties, still was able to fend of a full army in a matter of seconds without even using her powers.

We are currently in the middle of the fights to the death, and her next is in a few hours ; All the time needed to catch up. It's just too bad the permanent sun is constantly hurting my eyes. The things a woman would do for love.

"Ugh, I complain for the third time in the hour. How I hate the light of that unwavering sun. It's way too hot to fight."

Queen Lina the Ist Frosilaen gives me a sly smile before downing her third serpents' liquor. As always, she's unscathed by even the strongest of alcohols.

"Maybe you shouldn't have put on that black velvet dress then, girl."

"Mom, I am in my sixties. Stop calling me girl."

"And I am in my eighties, sweetheart, argument invalid."

She laughs, albeit a little bitter. I let it slide. I don't think I ever heard her laugh genuinely.

"But black velvet dress or not you'll complain anyway will you ?"

"Better complain than keep silent."

"Right. I'm happy speech therapy allowed you to break my ears with nagging," she said with a hint of sarcasm. "But next time, at least, bring an umbrella. And please, not the boney one. It's scaring your own faithful."

I roll my eyes. My faithful are used to it. The mandatians, anyway, I'll have to admit some of the clerics here still are not used to my bone set, the meltdowns that still happen when the sun is too hot or the noise too strong, my inability to talk in front of a lot of people when Moon isn't there, or my unfocused eyes. But I am Greater Archbishop for Moon's sake, they can get used to it.

Mother finishes her drink, before looking around the tavern.

"Where's Moon, anyway ?"

"Chasing interesting people. You know how they are. and you know, since we got king Kaizarz the Ist among the candidates..."

"Oh right ! I've been dying to test myself against that young bastard. Rumored to be the one who will kill Faloi and shit. Heh. Maybe he will, childlike that he is. Will get a thorn out of my side for sure."

I frown.

"Won't Lamia be unhappy about that ?"

"She will, but it's really not a matter of alliances or for the good of the divine Mandate," sighed mom while playing with her ring. "It's really just personal opinion."

Like always with cousin Faloi. I never got why exactly, but to be honest, I stopped being interested in the affairs of the Divine Mandate after Moon made me reorganize their church from scratch and put me at its lead. Religion has no place in state matter, neither personal ones.

I hear some noises at the entrance of the tavern, and before mom has any time to look, two people make their appearances. A blonde giant with a ruby-encreusted sword on his back, and a eerily beautiful woman behind a veil. Both are no older than twenty-one, I'm sure of it, even if I can't see much through the veil and the scales on the man's face make it harder to guess his real species.

They have a certain presence among them, the kind even mom, used to the biggest of this world, notices. She turns her head towards them, and watches as they take a place somewhere with beers without even noticing us.

"Well those are interesting people. See them, Selene ?"

I smile.

"Oh, they are my favorites here. I noticed them when Kaizarz and his guard came to the arena. The boy is a sorcerer strong enough to bring thunderstorms in the Eternal Day, and the girl has a weird magic within her. Strangely, only she participates to the tournament, and has been eliminated in the qualifications anyway."

"Too bad, I wanted to fight both, they look like compelling foes. But you didn't noticed them for their fighting abilities, did you ?"

As always, mom knows me too well, and her smile is a reflection of my own, sly and teasing. I wink softly, before turning my eyes towards the two youngsters that are now talking without even paying attention to the world.

"Lord Moon no. Only one glance is enough to see these two have a complicated relationship with a certain Kraken King. I've been watching them for some time and the dynamic is fascinating. If I didn't know any better, it would look like a weird love triangle. A real one."

"Ah, how it brings me to my youth, said mom with a smile. Monarchs and their convoluted relationships before they realise they can basically do whatever they want with enough notoriety."

"How much time did you take before marrying Chiara ?"

"Hey now, no sassing me, girl."

"Continue calling me girl and I'll never stop."

[treadmilltreats]

This too shall pass

Recently a lot has been coming at me. It's like the sun has been shining and your walking around on this beautiful day and all of a sudden out of no where, here comes this horrible storm that you were not ready for. Well, that about summarizes my life lately.

All of a sudden all kinds of shit has been coming at me at once and it's a little overwhelming, to say the least.

I have always been brutally honest in my blogs because I feel that if I am going to help someone else, if I am going to inspire somebody I need to show them The Good, The Bad, and The really ugly in life.

And because I write so much about myself, I have to be brutally honest to you all about my life. I know so many people who are so afraid to show the world who they really are, to show the world that they have faults, that they have had failures, that they're not the perfect Instagram person that they portray to be but that's not me.

My one purpose for being on this Earth is to inspire somebody with my story. I don't feel that I went through all that I've been through, all of that pain, all of that brokenness and  hitting rock-bottom not once but twice for nothing. All of this is for a lesson, to inspire someone else to keep going when they think that life is too tough.

I'm not embarrassed about my choices, I'm not embarrassed about my failures because I'm human and whether you admit it or not this is life and this is what we all go through. I don't care what people say about me, I do this because I know there's someone out there who God will put me in their path and they will be inspired to keep going that one more day because what I've done or what I've said or what I've been through and that's what keeps me going.

I always say that I am just human and there are some days that I, like you struggle. I struggle to get up in the morning, I struggle not to cry throughout the day, I struggle with life's storms that come at me. Yes, there are days that I feel like I'm drowning, I feel like I can't go on, I don't want to go on. I feel like crying out to God and trust me I do "When God? When will this happen? When will my dreams come true?"

I know he knows my heart, I know that he knows that this is my purpose and my passion because he gave me this. I know that I must be patient and it must be on his time and not mine but there are some days where I've just had enough. HELLO, I'VE HAD ENOUGH ALREADY!

There are some days where I am so sick of doing what I'm doing and I want it now. I know that's how so many people feel and I know that so many people won't admit to this because then you will look less than or not strong enough but what makes me stronger is the ability to admit that.

Yet, sometimes even the strongest of people need someone there to tell them it's going to be alright, to give them a hug, to let them cry in their arms. I speak for so many single mothers out there that are doing it all by themselves, that are the breadwinners and are taking care and raising amazing children all on their own. I know that there is no one there to help them, there's no one there to lean on, trust me I know how that feels. I'm just here to put it out to the world that I know there are some days where this feels like it's all too much.

But because of who I am, I cannot quit, I cannot give up.

I've already been to the dark side so this is just a bump in the road for me, this is just something I'll have a little pity party over and then get on with it because that is life, People.

It's has ups and downs, it's good, it's bad, that is life and you must just go with it. I remember my mother's favorite saying "This too shall pass"

There is someone out there, who is in a really great season and everything is going amazing and you feel like you're at the top of the world but always remember that "This too shall pass"

And you must remember when you get into that season of your life where everything is coming at you, where you feel like you're drowning, when you're lost and broken, remember "This too shall pass" because this is life.

It's beautiful and it's ugly and it's incredible, and it's heartbreaking and it's Joy and it's pain.... this is life and we all have to go through it, no one is exempt, no one gets away with all of the good or all of the bad.

So today my friends remember, no matter where you may be in this point of your life, if your in your good season or your holding on for your life in the storms, know that just like every time there is a storm, eventually the sun will shine again. Remember this too shall pass.

"Be the change you want to see"

 

"And just when the caterpillar thought his life over...he turned into a beautiful butterfly"

**Now released my latest book**

The Blessing in Disguise.... revealed

https://www.amazon.com/Blessing-Disguise-Revealed-story-faith/dp/1074340493/ref=sr_1_19?keywords=the+blessing+in+disguise&qid=1561392004&s=books&sr=1-19

***Now available***

My 1st book The blessing in Disguise

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[pamiedrawnic-acid]

Re:Zero Review

Borrowed photo

Ola! It's been a while since I made a review and I think this is the 4th time that I'll be reviewing an anime. Oh well, me reviewing something means this show is really amazing cause I got a lot of beautiful things to say about it. Yes, I only want to review things I've found beautiful because it's really not in my nature to rant about something since it's really tiring and I hate negative thoughts! 😆

Well, let's get down to the business, first things first, what's with Re:zero?

Re:zero or starting life in another world is what exactly the title tells us about. It's a story of a typical shut in guy who suddenly got into another world, with this story a game-like world, set in a medieval era, where magics were not a very unusual thing and where humans and humanoids live together. Fortunately, our protagonist, Subaru, was very fond of playing games so he had already an idea on how to start or how to literally "play the game." Such a generic story isn't it? It's supposed to be but it's actually not.

Normally, in such stories, the protagonist is supposed to have an unknown ability that will only be released when the situation calls for it. Most of the time it would later on revealed that the protagonist in an important part of the world, either a part of the royal blood, a saviour, a god etc. Also in some stories, there would even have a character who would appear in front of the protagonist and explain whatever is happening. Likewise with how Subaru expected it, I was also expecting for the same thing. However, what happened was really unexpected.

[SPOILERS ALERT] He died but then he was reset to his last save point; literally like a game. The difference was, he would not know where or when was his save point unless he would die and be reset. Also, this ability of him do not allow him to have any choice. Once he died, he would automatically go back and complete his mission, which he still needed to figure out. The only rule is that, he would die over and over unless he could solve the mystery or found the "happy ending." Thus, "quitting" was not an option.

At first I thought that it was such a very convenient ability. At least you'll have another chance, not just once but as many as you want until you find the happy ending. But as I moved to each episodes and as the story goes deeper I've realized that NO it's not very convenient.

Subaru can reset from death thus, if there was something not good happening with his life, with his friends or even with the kingdom, which would result to their deaths, then he was the only one who could change it. Imagine the pressure and the burden that he was carrying?!

Subaru did not have any choice but to go over and over into an ugly situation not until he could find the solution

Have you tried solving a math problem that needed you to go over from the scratch because you know somehere in between you made a mistake but can't find it so you have to do it again? Or a science experiment that ended in a bad result so you need to go back to procedure 1? A project, a drawing, or anything~ anything that you were doing but did not go well so you have no other choice but to do it again, over and over, not to mention that your only option was to finish it. Frustrating isn't it? Imagine how frustrated, irritated, desperate and tired Subaru was? Not to mention all the time he needed to go back just to witness the death/s of the people around him.

Lastly, [SPOILERS ALERT] Subaru's ability was actually a cursed from some witch, which he couldn't tell to anyone because everytime he tried to, the witch would squeezed his heart to the point that he could almost die. Out of desperation, he actually tried to tell it to someone but that someone died. Imagine how difficult it was for Subaru to face everything alone? No one could understand him not because he didn't want them to but because he COULDN'T. (cursed that witch I definitely wanted to tear her apart! 👹)

I've read a lot of comments from somewhere on how people disliked Subaru because he was a helpless, hopeless, useless boy. Because he did not have any special power or because he was weak. Well, after all he had been through, is he still useless?

Yes, he showed us the time when he almost quit even resorting into running away because he had failed so many times and thought that there was no other choice but to leave. He showed us his frustrations, desperations, helplesness and weaknesses, that he actually admitted and you hated. Well, on the other side of the note, I commend the writer for doing a great job because I believed that, that really what he wanted you to feel. Congratulations! You've been his victim! 🙊 Going back, Subaru really became a hateful character those times but if you are going to watch the anime and try to put your feet into Subaru's you will understand me or perhaps him.

He was disheartened for who knows how many times. He was fighting all by himself. Despite of having his friends and allies who supported him with his actions and especially to those who gave him courage and moral supports, no one really knows what he was going through. He was all ALONE. But still at the end of the day he would always proved to us how strong he was; mentally and emotionally, and that, stories only ends once you've reached the happy ending so life's goes on until you became happy! Quitting was never an option!

The only downside I've seen with him is that [MAJOR SPOILER] when he did not choose Rem despite of all the things she had done for him and even asked her to help her save Emilia, the woman he trully love. He was such a cruel man, a fact that actually Rem accepted and even told him outloud which he actually agreed with. However, despite of that, I still believed that he only showed how faithful he was to the woman he love. For me he was a man of word who knows how to fulfill his promises.

I'm sorry for defending Subaru so much but I really like how his character was made in this story. Everything, including his downsides, just fell rightly into the plot and that was something you wouldn't find mostly in the animes now a days. Another thing is that, I really liked how he could accept his own flaws but would still do something to compensate with it and not to be a burden to all the powerful people around him. He was the weakest but he was also the embodiment of willpower and unending hope which made him the strongest!

Story wise, as I've said, it was a very typical but was also different at the same time. It actually gave me the feeling that it was something that I've seen before but actually I haven't. I think it's because of how the story was narrated by using the main character. The writer was actually succesful in making me experience what the main character is going through, as if I am Subaru himself. Both of us learned things about the realm at the same time. Both of us believed that some things will happen, like on a typical story, but then will hit us the least that we have expected, as if both Subaru and I were played by fate. For example is what I have said from above, when Subaru first arrived on the kingdom and he thought that since he was summoned in a different world he would definitely have a super power, which made me believed also, but he actually never had. He also remained as an outsider, someone who do not hold so much of a power, a weak human with no special fighting ability except for his naturally strong body and an incredible amount of willpower. He was not revealed as a saviour but he made himself as the saviour of the kingdom. In the end, his journey to the other world actually made him a better man; wiser and stronger mentally and emotionally.

Overall, this story was very unique on its own way. Every seconds of each 25 episodes was worth watching as you wouldn't want to missed any sudden heart attack moments and important information that will be necessary for the future. It was actually a dark story that gets a little bit of depressing but would lighten up in the end. It's a complete pack of action, drama, suspense, mystery, romance and comedy with a bonus of life lessons and words of encouragement. YOU DON'T QUIT, YOU ONLY CHANGE YOUR PLAN and STORIES ALWAYS ENDS WITH HAPPY ENDING; It's not yet the end if it's not happy.

I can actually give this series a 10/10 score if not because of the hanging questions they left after the last episode. I hope this would be answered on the next season (if there will be!). I've heard that there will be an OVA but I don't think it will be enough to tackle everything and give the story a solid conclusion. This is the kind of anime that worth having more season! Anyway whether they'll decide to give it a season 2 or not I will still recognize this anime as one of the best I've watch for being unique and unpredictable as well as for having a well constructed story and characters.

Rating: 9/10 - highly recommended