#i kind of feel sorry for levi having to deal with grumpy lucifer

[leviathanswingman]

killing me softly, chapter 9: intervening

Diavolo fixed Lucifer with an intense stare. He still hadn't eased up on his death hold, so Lucifer and him were only mere inches apart from each other.

Oh, this was dangerous.

Lucifer was the first to avert his gaze and instead focused on the swirly pattern of the wallpaper to calm his breathing and collect himself again. „How long have you been awake for?“ he asked, dreading the worst. „If that was all it took to wake you up, I've clearly been doing the wrong thing for decades.“

Diavolo scoffed. „So that's how it's going to be.“

He released his grip on Lucifer's body to cradle his face instead, rough hands on surprisingly soft cheeks, forcing him to look into his eyes again.

„For how long do you think you can keep up this charade? You are dying,“ he said. Despite himself, Diavolo had lost all willingness to keep up a playful front. He was dead serious now and his eyebrows were furrowed in confusion. There was a certain expression on his face, it was almost as if he were searching for the last piece of the puzzle that would finally make him understand Lucifer's uncharacteristic defiance. Perhaps he would find it if he studied Lucifer's face long enough.

„I'll live just fine,“ Lucifer grumbled in response, his face as stoic as usual.

“How? Out of nothing but spite? Not even you can do that. Hell, not even I would be able to do that!” Diavolo growled. “It's not worth it if it means losing you. Confess already and move on, I need you. Your brothers need you.”

For a split second an undeniable look of hurt slipped through the cracks of Lucifer's otherwise indestructible poker face. He shook off Diavolo's hands, took hold of the bloodied handkerchief that had still been lying on the bed, and sat up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed. Holding the handkerchief to his mouth once again, he coughed six blue petals into it before letting it disappear in the pocket of his pants.

He threw Diavolo one last, indecipherable look. “Of course, my lord. I'll make sure to eradicate these pesky feelings. Thank you for your hospitality and also, excuse me for the inconvenience I've caused you,” he stated coldly as he slipped on his dress shoes, distinctly avoiding Diavolo's gaze.

At this point Diavolo had sat up on his bed, watching Lucifer in confusion.

Had he said something he shouldn't have said? All he'd wanted to do was help Lucifer get back to his old, unbothered self.

If there was one thing Diavolo couldn't stand for certain then it was seeing his beloved Lucifer in this much pain. It cost him all of his strength to remain in place when his brain yelled at him to go on a one man mission through the whole country to weed out the one person who had managed to do the unthinkable; to find that one person who had managed to steal Lucifer's heart, a feat Diavolo himself had attempted uncountable times, but had failed at over and over again, no matter how hard he tried.

Certain things just couldn't be earned through persistence after all. After all, there was a thin line to be walked between pursuing the object of your admiration and obsessing over them, so Diavolo had resigned himself to a purely professional connection between him and Lucifer. He had resigned himself to courteous nods, secret glances, shoulders brushing in the heat of war.

Lucifer smoothed down his clothes before turning towards the door. With one last look at Diavolo, he pressed down the handle.

“Barbatos wanted to talk to you about business. But you heard him, so there's no need for me to tell you twice.” The door slammed closed.

Seconds passed as Diavolo simply stared at the door.

Something felt off, yet he couldn't tell what had gone wrong. Even as he thought about it intensely and thoroughly, he didn't know what he'd done wrong. Still, Diavolo couldn't shake the feeling that something had gone awfully awry.

Perhaps it was really time for him to go and see Barbatos.

Lucifer walked down the hallway in a hurried pace.

He had been an utter fool. Of course, Diavolo would have overheard his conversation with Barbatos.

Of course, Barbatos had never explicitly stated that Lucifer was in love with Diavolo, yet even a stranger could have been able to gather all of the evidence that had been dropped in that conversation and figured out that Lucifer was undeniably in love with Diavolo.

Though he often had his dense moments, Diavolo certainly wasn't dumb. Actually, the demon prince was incredibly intelligent, scarily so. There was no way he hadn't it all figured out. Perhaps he had known all along.

To say he had been rejected was much easier than the actual truth. Not only had Lucifer been rejected, he had also harshly been told to just move on.

His lungs weighed heavily under that truth, spores and roots choking him considerably more violently than before.

Akin to the way a mortician would tend to a new body, Lucifer made his way to the next bathroom he could find, checking if he could feel any other demons nearby, then locking himself in the next best bathroom stall before leaning down to the toilet, one hand placed on the stall's wall to steady himself; a routine. Roses, white and blue in an unholy union, loyalty and the one thing he could never have, pouring down the pipes.

Lucifer used a wad of toilet paper to clean up the trail of saliva and blood that had dripped down his chin, almost sullying his clothes.

For a few more moments he stared at the rose petals that were almost clogging up the pipes. Lucifer mustered the blue-white mess, his chest void of any kind of emotion.

They were almost taunting him.

A certain sort of numbness crawled through his bones and suddenly, Lucifer smashed the hand that'd been holding him up harshly against the stall. With a loud cracking noise the wall gave in, shaking violently as bits and pieces dropped to the ground, leaving a huge hole behind.

A loud shriek emerged from the neighbouring stall Lucifer had just punched a hole into. As he looked through it, at first he couldn't make out anything that could've caused that ear-piercing sound.

Annoyed, Lucifer stuck his head through the hole and looked around more carefully, peering down.

Below the hole cowered one of his brothers, shielding his head with both of his arms before reluctantly looking up.

“Levi.”

Leviathan stared at his older brother for a moment, his big orange eyes never wavering.

That calculating gaze of his made Lucifer shiver. He felt like his brother could see right through him.

“I- is there anything you wanted from me, Lucifer?” Levi eventually asked, sweat pearling down his temple. He removed his hands from the top of his head and used them to prop himself off the ground instead. Quickly, he tried to dust off his pants but failed miserably in doing so, and then took a few steps back to lean against the wall opposite the hole.

“Why would I seek you out so I could talk to you through bathroom stalls?” Lucifer asked quizzically as he leaned against the wall as well, resting one arm lazily on the frayed edges of the newly formed hole. He could already feel a migraine coming on.

Levi cleared his throat. “Well, in the graphic novel 'My heart keep racing whenever I look at you but we are childhood friends who are cursed to stay five feet apart from each other so I couldn't possibly love you!' the main character and his best friend always meet up in the bathroom during their lunch break so they could discuss their-”

Lucifer interrupted him before he could find himself stuck with one of Levi's infamous rants.

“Leviathan.”

The demon in question quickly stopped talking. Hearing Lucifer use his full name never promised much good. ”Y-yeah?” he asked, but then remembered the exact situation he had gotten himself into. A situation so peculiar that it almost reeked of dramatic potential. For a moment, he mustered his surroundings in confusion. Right, there was a hole in the wall of the bathroom stall.

“There's a hole in the wall,” he mumbled, trying to suppress the unyielding urge to play detective. He raised his head again and looked at his brother. Based on the evidence he had gathered, there was only one conclusion to this mystery. “There's a considerably big hole in the wall, the only suspects in this case are me and Lucifer. There's no way I'm the perpetrator, except if you consider the possibility of an unreliable narrator, which I don't think I am, so there's only one possibility left,” Levi mumbled as he pointed at Lucifer. “You're the only one!”

Lucifer stared at him blankly, unblinkingly. “Get out of here,” he simply stated. He was in no way in the mood to deal with his hikkikomori brother's shenanigans. Truthfully, he was rarely in the mood to deal with Levi's obsessive otaku ramblings.

Levi took a small step towards the hole and stuck his neck around the corner, spying past Lucifer.

“What's that?” he asked, pointing towards the toilet overflowing with petals and rose buds. “Huh?”

His eyes dashed from the toilet to Lucifer and back again, travelling back and forth over and over again. “Huh? Huh huh huh? HUH?!”

All of a sudden, Lucifer slammed his hand flat against the stall and put his head through the hole he had created minutes prior. “You didn't see anything. If you did, I will not hesitate to burn your whole Ruri-chan collection to a crisp,” he threatened, his eyes gleaming dangerously in the sub-par bathroom lighting.

With a loud bang Levi hit the back of the stall as he had taken several steps back in fear. He clenched his shirt and panted heavily. “You wouldn't!” he exclaimed, eyes desperate.

Instead of giving an answer Lucifer simply stared at him, a deranged smile slowly starting to spread over his face. “Oh?”

“You're smiling. Why  are you smiling like that, this isn't good. Don't look at me like that, Lucifer! Please spare my Ruri-chan collection, she's the only thing that's worth living for! You wouldn't want to be the reason for your little brother's suicide now, would you-”

Lucifer grabbed the edges of the hole with both of his hands. “Stop it. Come here,” he growled, staring at his brother intensely.

Levi didn't move one bit.

“Come. Here. “

Reluctantly, Levi approached his brother who mustered him with a deadly glare. Before he could say anything, Lucifer sighed. “Don't talk like that, Levi. We've been through this, your presence at RAD is important and needed. Don't talk yourself down like that. You are my sibling and the third oldest of us all, take pride in that.” He reached through the hole and put his hand on his brothers shoulder. All in all, it was a peculiar and somewhat awkward situation. Neither of them knew how to react.

Finally, Lucifer pulled back and massaged his temples. “Now leave. I'm busy with preparations. Tell the others that it would be to their best interest if they managed to stay out of my way for once.”

“Ah, yes, sure, ” Levi mumbled as he left the bathroom stall. After having washed his hands, he made his way towards the music room.

Taken aback, by Lucifer's sudden kindness, he had almost forgotten what he had left his room for to begin with.

“There you are,” Barbatos said as the door opened and Levi entered the music room. All of his brothers except for Lucifer were already there and evidently, he was the last one to join them. He plopped down on the couch next to Satan.

Then, the doors opened once again and Diavolo entered the room.

“Lord Diavolo,” Barbatos started as he caught sight of the demon prince.

“What does this mean, explain yourself.”

Barbatos locked eyes with Asmodeus for a short moment as they both nodded.

“Lord Diavolo, this is an intervention.”

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6 , Chapter 7, Chapter 8,Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12, Chapter 13

*nsfw chapter

taglist:  @el-does-photography​

[obeymeluv]

Who Plays Match-Maker?

»»————-　♡　————-«« »»————-　♡　————-«« 

Even devils need a little help sometimes! »»————-　♡　————-«« »»————-　♡　————-«« 

I have too many ideas for this blog and I’m not sure what to share first :/ The askbox should be open so if you have any suggestions or want to send something, feel free!

These blurbs are inspired by who would play wingman/match-maker for each brother. Sorry if the font or format is messed up. I wrote/submitted this from a different computer. And had to redo it because Tumblr froze the first time I tried.

When Lucifer is in love...

He’s going to deny it BIG TIME. Why? Well, he has so many responsibilities and if Diavolo needs him--! Lucifer basically runs from his feelings and doesn’t want to admit he could be in love with someone because he’s spent thousands of years alone. Thousands of years being head of the house, upholding his image and his loyalty to Diavolo.

As much as he entertains the idea, it somehow seems like laziness. Like he’s falling short somehow. It’s not something he feels he deserves, especially when he thinks of how long he lied to his brothers. Asmodeus would step in to work this out because who better than him?! He’s not the Avatar of Lust for nothing!

If he’s having a hard time pushing the two together, he’ll enlist Satan for backup because Satan could annoy him into almost anything. Involving Diavolo’s last on the list, but Asmodeus WILL have the two dating before long!  

When Mammon is in love...

He’s easier to read and more open to the idea of dating. Anyone who knows him knows he often acts opposite of how he feels. Mammon may complain about doing things with you but that tell-tale blush on his face proves he doesn’t mean any of it and actually loves spending time with you. It’s pretty easy for ANY of the brothers to rile him, call him out, and get him to confess to something accidentally. Being second-born means his only real kryptonite is Lucifer; centuries of dealing with the younger five leaves him pretty unmoved by their tactics.

Mammon and Lucifer seem to have a radar for each others schemes and behaviors; Mammon’s going to get that hair-tickling feeling that Lucifer’s up to something and notice he’s hanging around you too much. That just gets him because NO ONE’S HANGING AROUND HIS HUMAN MORE THAN HER FIRST MAN, YA KNOW?!

When Levi is in love...

I think he’d be in denial for a long time. If it’s not because of the ‘Ew, normie!’, it’s the creeping and crushing possibility that you could love any of his brothers. Any of them would be better for you. Levi could write you lists of proof, and he’s not shy in assuming people think of him as a ‘gross otaku’ so he’s probably seen his fair share of teasing and degradation that makes love harder to believe in. If you can make it to friends, he’ll be more open and confident with the idea of dating you.

He’s slow to realize his affection for you because he can down-play it and rationalize all of your nice behaviors, but he’ll look back on his game models, NPC crushes, and realize they start to have things in common with you.

Practically every brother will jump at the chance to help their sweet baby Levi out because he’s a late bloomer and deserves the best in life. It’s a huge, huge thing for him to want to be in a relationship and they want to help it work! Satan would be good at talking logically with him, almost in an encouraging therapist kind of way. He’d let Levi draw his own conclusions but loud Mammon is always there to drop the obvious of ‘if you don’t like her, why does NPC look like her?!’ 

When Satan is in love...

He’s the quiet pining type. As beautiful as a relationship sounds, the cold logic hits him in the face. It’s probably not good for him to get into a relationship, being the Avatar of Wrath and all. You’re so delicate that things could go horribly, unforgivably wrong faster than he could bear! And yet, as he hides away in his books he’s absolutely tormented by all of the hopeful ‘maybes’ floating around. 

Satan could just see it and it’s so beautiful! His heart’s doing something wonderfully dangerous and he wonders if he’ll drop dead sometime soon. Lucifer sees it before Satan sees it, and calls him out on it. The embarrassed rage of being called out is enough for Satan to deny it, or make an ass of himself right as you come around to hear the confession (sneaky, prideful bastard planned this!)

Asmodeus or Mammon just love to make up little white lies--”You’re looking for her? She went with X!”--to see him fly off a flustered mess. If he doesn’t like you, why is he so worried? Those white lies always end up with Satan bursting in somewhere just to find you by yourself. And now you’re alone with him. 

When Asmodeus is in love...

This guy needs no help! Are you kidding?! His reputation is the hardest to overcome since his nature makes him a lovable person. There’s no shortage of people willing to tell you a scandalous story or about a time they hooked up with him. Maybe out of jealousy or just being truthful. Asmo is happy to tell you all of this himself just to prove he’s serious, but he imagines it’s still a lot to take.

Solomon or Simeon would offer to brew a truth-telling potion (at Asmo’s insistence) for you to ask your most burning questions. Belphegor swears up and down that Asmo loves you because he never shuts up and lets him sleep when he’s nearby. 

When Beelzebub is in love...

Is it hunger or something else? Indigestion? He gets all warm and flustered and, honestly, kind of absent-minded. Beel is pretty smart but his mind basically runs on two things when he’s got a crush: food and the crush. Caring but shy, I think he’d make his own confession efforts (sharing food, etc.) and would accidentally botch them by eating all of the food before the plan happens.

He’s a nervous eater, okay? And he needed energy to confess, anyways!

Being his twin, Belphegor is obviously the first to step up and help his brother out. He’ll tell you point blank and restate that he’s sacrificing a nap to tell you this so you better listen up, human! There’s some threats thrown in--do you take them seriously or not?--but Belphie’s said his piece and he’s going back to sleep.

Simeon is all too happy to tell you about Beel’s nervous eating and rambling. “All of it was about you, I think that’s pretty special!” as Beel hides around the corner to watch this all unfold, dying of embarrassment and trying to sneak up on Simeon to grab some of the pastries he brought to the House of Lamentation. 

When Belphegor is in love...

He’s going to be a grumpy sourpuss. Not going to say it outright. On the surface, he’s not waxing poetic or showering you with gifts. If anyone else is around, expect to be treated kind of coldly. It’s his version of casual-in-denial and it’s all sharper than he means but Belphie’s awkward and uncomfortable around others.

All of it’s easier in private when he can say it all with the special privilege of sharing his bed. Maybe even his famous cow pillow. Because he’s hard to read and leaves before anyone can see him blush or pout (and whatever else you do to him) you’re DEFINITELY going to need some fraternal intervention.

Beelzebub has no shame in outing his brother (especially for food) because it’s really cute and he just wants someone to know. He’s happy for his brother, and he wants to see him even happier by dating someone! If Belphie talks in his sleep, has a dream, or complains about something one of the other brothers did with you, you’ll know.

That’s hard proof right there!

Once outed Belphie comes forward himself. If he thinks Asmo’s gotten wind of his crush, he beats Asmo to you. No way is he letting Asmo broadcast his feelings everywhere!