#i keep trying to but then i quit it and go back to playing bloodborne JDKSJF

[phoenixcatch7]

Spent the morning on bloodborne and the evening on stardew valley... Very different states of play. In bloodborne I've got 19 in blood tinge and 23 in endurance. In stardew valley I've got a 6 in fishing and 4 in foraging.

I've started the beach farm, which is a fairly challenging one and not one I'd recommend to new players - sprinklers don't work in the sand that's 70% of the whole farm. I figured going in I'd have to change my usual methods (huge fields) in favour of, well, everything else.

Usually my main focus is on the crops, with only a small orchard and few tapped trees, one shed, one coop and barn each. Most space goes to crops and, of course, animal grass. I've never had enough grass to sustain itself no matter what fencing techniques I use, so this time I'm going to section off a full third of the farm just to let them run free and hopefully get something I don't have to keep replacing, especially once I swap to blue grass late game.

I've also dedicated the little grassy meadow area to just decoration, which isn't my usual style but I was a little overwhelmed with the size. It'll be nice. I've planned for a hut and a well, just to feel nice.

When drawing up the blueprints on the sdv planner thing I like to leave it fairly undecorated, because a) that takes ages and b) it's nice to be able to come up with the designs organically with the actual resources I have when it becomes time and not try to get it pixel perfect according to a map I drew up weeks/months ago and c) inevitably it will fall apart and I'll have to do it differently anyway. So. No idea on the details or even if everything will work out as I hope but fingers crossed!!

I don't have any hardwood on the farm, I like to use the quarry for that, so that saves space. And I've remembered to block out a space for the stable! Didn't do that last time XD. I hope I'll be able to even fence off a little pseudo field. I really need to check if trees work the way I remember, I'm hoping for a proper orchard!

Ooh and I moved the greenhouse! I normally keep it close to where it started, but man I appreciate the ability to move it around. Took it off the little island and moved it just below my house. In its place I've built a circle of obelisks! (... Eventually. Even on my main farm I haven't got the final one (dragon teeth my beloathed.) Quite proud of that.

All these buildings, but the main path runs along the very back! I hate having stuff or paths behind buildings, doesn't feel right at all. And I'm still not fully sold on where I'm putting the silos (because I'll need SO MANY to keep like 50 animals through the winter. Will need to do the maths later) but there should be space to move around.

One of my new problems was that usually I can put everything against the walls of the farm, but I can't do that now - it's all water! It'd be weird!

My favourite part is hands down the little sandy area sticking out with the return totem mouse, because I've put my fish ponds there and I'm going to put stepping stones scattered around so it's like rock pools :D.

The most important part of any sdv farm is the ability to match play progress. A patch dedicated to mystic syrup isn't much help in the first fifty hours, but you'll need space to put them on hour 60. I've got a patch ready for banana and mango trees, but for the majority of the time it's going to be more tree tappers, and maybe some seasonal forage seeds. The slime hutch is conveniently placed to leave empty, but if any of my other areas don't work the over flow can go there. I can fit it in the meadow.

But seriously, this is such a hard farm to design! I looked up inspiration and everything was either min maxed to death and stupidly high maintenance (think random tapped trees in every spare inch and 1 block wide paths) or way too aesthetic (random beehives and twisting impractical paths with long grass and stray fence posts EVERYWHERE and a plaza dedicated to the golden clock). A couple even had sprinklers in the sand, like way to show that you made it purely in the editor and haven't so much as looked at it in game.

But overall I'm really excited!! I've played a few other farms, but this is the project following in the footsteps of my year 5 wilderness farm. I feel like I've got a lot more experience and understanding of the game to bring to the table, especially late game stuff now I can't be spoiled, and I'm ready to tackle this challenge.

[ostrichmonkey-games]

I keep wondering, where does the name Ostrich Monkey come from? Is it just two animals you like fused together into some kind of a chimera or is there some other meaning?

Also I happened to notice that Vibe Check (which I'm looking forward to buying come next payday) name checks TWEWY. I haven't played TWEWY but I find the topic of RPGs inspired by video games endlessly fascinating (I'm also on a huge Interstitial kick in spite of not having played Kingdom Hearts). Is there any other video game you would some day like to use as a starting point for a tabletop game?

So! Fun story, the handle "ostrichmonkey" has no meaning! Way back in like, 2011 when I was making my main tumblr, I needed a username, and this was what ended up sticking. Kept it for basically all my socials, and when I started doing more ttrpg stuff, just slapped "games" onto the end of it.

Good thing is, it's rarely ever taken on websites lol.

Also hello from Vibe Check! TWEWY is one my favorite video games of all time (and like, easily one of the best DS games), so if you ever get a chance, I highly recommend it. I think video games are a really fun place to pull inspiration from honestly! It's fun to try and figure out what elements you want to try and work into the tabletop-design-space. I've also done it for Dishonored with Paktbound, and have some very early ideas swirling for something inspired by the new Marathon that I've talked a bit about here and here.

I would love to play in Kingdom Hearts space some (KH2 is another all time fav), approaching from a different angle than Insterstitial (which absolutely rules, I adore that game). I would love to dive into the weird, complicated, fantasy melodrama of the franchise - so less focus on the world hopping elements for example.

At one point I was working on an SSX Tricky inspired game (couldn't quite figure out how I wanted to do semi-competitive-but-also-cooperative as an approach), but at some point I want to get back into that.

Related to Vibe Check, I have a loose idea that takes inspiration from rogue-likes and Neon White, where you go through different procedural generated "runs" with limited use Tokens (like cards in Neon White) that you're constantly picking up and using.

The in-progress Dark Confluence is directly inspired narratively by the Dark Souls/Bloodborne/Elden Ring series, though less so mechanically.

There's probably more, but those are just a few that immediately came to mind!

[kiaryn-ledgem]

WhimsiKarren’s Games of the Year

In no particular order.

Let’s get Elden Ring out of the way. It’s not my favourite of the fromsoft games as the top spot there for me is Sekiro, but it is at the very least tied with bloodborne for being my favourite of the more proper souls games. There's not much I can say that hasn't already been said about it.

Lets you marry another lady as a lady. Perfect game.

Tunic

If I were more inclined to make a list, this one might be number one. Tunic is a game that hits me, specifically, the way games like La Mulana and Ittle Dew 2 do. It's got fun exploring and combat but the real meat, the real fun, is the elaborate world spanning puzzles and secrets. These games feel few and far between and I eat them up everytime I find one. Ah...

An aside, is outer wilds a secret explory puzzle game? I keep hearing about it and have yet to try it... Might do that soon.

Also. Not sure it's all that gay. Not really enough characters for that though. Somehow my favourite game despite lack of gay. Impressive.

Last Hero of Nostalgaia

this one came out of left field at the end of the year thanks to a friend. This souls-like game quite effectively nails the demons's souls/dark souls 1 feel and might be one of the better souls games not by from ive played. It's got a bit of a 4th wall breaking stanley parable aspect to it that's neat and has a sort of puzzle mechanic with gear where you can unlock effects by bringing the gear to a scenic location hinted at in its item description. Pretty neat all around! I haven't finished it yet but I'm close and even if it nosedives I'd recommend it for how much I've gotten out of it already.

not all that gay but there's a couple cool ladies.

Splatoon 3

Not as good as octo expansion, but a damn fine expansion to the game. Story mode had a bunch of cool and fun levels that make me look forward to its dlc where I can get my favourite videogame couple back. Played the hell out of its multiplayer in September and fell off as always, but I enjoy the time I spent with it. Feels good to control, is a blast to play, high recommend if you wanna jump and shoot.

once pearl and marina come back it will return to being canonically gay. almost perfect game.

Floppy Knights

A cute little strategy game with a deckbuilder element mixed in. It's not the most addictive turn based grid strategy game I've ever played and I did get bored towards the end and haven't finished it, but Im certain I'll go back and complete it eventually. For the first 3/4ths of the game I'd say it was well worth playing. And you get the delicious art from the artist behind Dicey Dungeons! It's beautiful and cute!

There's a rivaly between two girls. Maybe gay? Unknown...

Signalis

Oh damn this horror game! Not yet done this one either (man im slow at games; not enough time to finish everything!) but this is amazing! The art style is incredible and while the limmited inventory is a bit ridiculous I am in love with the aesthetics. Could do without the screams on the enemies tho. Definately the best horror game i've played in long time.

also seems pretty gay from where I got. Pretty good game.

[ordosmarkzero]

I started a Dark Souls replay a little while ago, have been wanting to for a while but was waiting for the pc servers to come back online because playing without messages just felt wrong.

Has been my first time playing since I beat it a few years ago, my first time on the Remastered version and my 2nd proper playthrough (I had a few failed attempts before I beat it the first time where I never got much further than around Darkroot Garden / Depths).

Here's some random thoughts I've had during my playthrough, might continue to update this as I go, also spoiler warning I guess?

This is my first time doing an INT/DEX build (Sorcery) properly, all 3 games + Bloodborne I did STR mainly. At first I felt very powerful compared to that and was surprised at how quickly you can blitz down bosses, but as it went on I started to feel the trade off of not having big armour and not being able to hit as hard with your weapon. I'm glad it's now feeling more like a different kind of challenge instead of just being easier. I'm also intrigued to try out faith now too.

I keep going back and forth and how I feel about the lack convenience compared to 2&3. When I got to just before O&S in Anor Londo I was starting to feel like my spells weren't hitting hard enough so I resolved that I had to go back and buy the ring that boosts sorcery. This meant I had to go back through Anor Londo, then descend Sen's Fortress all whilst not using a bonfire so I could easily Homeward Bone back. It wasn't that bad as you can run past the big guys in AL and I had unlocked the elevator in Sen's, but I got knocked off a ledge by a trap due to rushing + nerves and fell to the bottom, I only just survived and had to then use the ladder to get back up. This journey wasn't that much of a big deal but was definitely one of the more memorable parts of my playthrough, whereas in 2 & 3 it would have just been warping back to the hub then warping back to where I was and have lasted about a minute or two. I also enjoy that the merchants and blacksmiths are spread around the world, makes them and the world feel more alive. But sometimes I do find the "oh I need this item/upgrade so I have to travel all the way here" quite tiresome. I suppose it works better in DS1 because it's a lot easier and quicker to get from place to place.

I tried the Forest Hunter covenant for the first time and it's pretty fun! I never really did any PvP in the first game and most people are much better than me but I enjoyed doing it for a while.

The separation between magic & enchanted feels kind of pointless. Maybe I'm not using the right weapon or I've messed up my build somehow but I plugged my stats and weapon into mugenmonkey and even when I extrapolated my INT to around where it'll probably end up the difference was so minimal in what damage my weapon would end up doing between the two.

It's probably because I play the game quite late at night and the game is so old but it feels quite dead. I've barely seen any summon signs and never been summoned when I dropped one of my own. Have had a few invasions though. I think I'll try again during Return to Lordran and see whether that's any better (which I guess would also be a good time to test out a faith build).

I'd kind of blended together Siegmeyer & Siegward in my mind. Whilst I still like Siegmeyer and think he's quite funny, I love Siegward, he's so charming and all the encounters with him are fun. The first time you meet him and the game lets you know he's there because you hear the "hmmmm" as you pass him on the elevator is forever in my mind and one of my favourite introductions to a character.

On the other hand I found Solaire a bit boring on my first full playthrough but I'm liking him a lot more this time.

The Undead female merchant is also pretty fun, "you'd trust a piece of moss over me..."

[arigatouiris]

an inconvenient crush // kozume kenma x reader (2/2)

Author’s Note: Thank you so much for the support! I really appreciate people coming in and telling me you liked my story! Makes me feel so loved and valid, I can’t even begin to tell you how special it makes me feel. Here’s the final part! Do let me know what you think! Thank you so much :”)

Word count: 4k+

Pairing: YouTuber! Kenma Kozume x Streamer! Reader

Summary: YouTuber Kozume Kenma has had the biggest crush on Twitch Streamer, (s/n) (y/n), who in actuality simps heavily after Kenma’s secret YouTube persona, puddinghead0.

What happens when their paths cross?

Kuroo is honestly tired of Kenma’s second-guessing, and (y/n) is a bit of a crackhead.

Warnings: unrequited love, one-sided crush, slight angst, pining, crackhead reader, internet bullying, slang, gaming references, haikyuu manga spoilers, fluff

C h a p t e r T w o: kozume in love

Kenma chuckled when he heard you scream over the controller. The both of you were currently fighting a boss named Martyr Logarius, and while you had beaten the game once, playing it in Newgame+ was extra hard. Kenma was certainly helping, but you had made a silly mistake and died for the fourth time in a row.

    "You're dodging too early," Kenma said, still chuckling, "But it is entertaining to see you dodge in such panic."

    "Shut up," You groaned over the microphone, earning more chuckles from him, "I'm trying, okay?"

    "You beat this game, you said?"

    "Ahhh!"

Kenma laughed some more, now covering his face with his hand. He could hear you laugh out of frustration as well, but while this entire orchestration felt funny to both of you, Kenma's heart bubbled dangerously. He loved the sound of your voice, and he absolutely adored the way you groaned and cursed at the bosses each time you died or each time you defeated them. You were good, and even as the game tested you, you trod on. He could see you loved gaming in its entirety, and slowly, he was learning more about you.

    "I need a beer." You sighed.

    "This game does that to you," Kenma leaned back against his bean bag, "I mean... Not to burst your bubble, but you do suck."

    "Oye," You warned playfully, "I'm a streamer."

    "Anyone can stream, (y/n)."

There was silence on the other end after that, but Kenma didn't think it was anything odd. The co-oping between you two was going on for a few days now, and it would last up to 5-7 hours at most. It was strange that despite college, you two managed to find time to sit and play, but after a point, it had become more than just the game. You began to crave his voice, crave the way he'd be there, whenever you were about to run low on health, he'd come over and give you time to heal.

Co-oping with Kenma was fun because it felt, oddly, as if he really cared.

    "(y/n)?"

    "I always thought you sounded familiar," Kenma blinked, "But I think hearing you say more words sort of... gave it away."

    "Gave what away?" Kenma's heart was pounding now.

    "Kozume-kun," He didn't want to hear the rest, "Are you puddinghead0?"

It took him several seconds to process what you said. He could practically feel his heart beat against his ears, and he could sense you getting impatient at him as well.

    "Kozume—"

    "How did you know?"

You took a few moments to answer.

    "I... I've been a fan for too long not to recognize your voice, really. I just... I guess I had to hear you through the microphone to instantly pick it up? I don't know I... Why didn't you tell me?"

    "I didn't want you to know."

    "Oh," His heart broke at how low you sounded. "I... I'm sorry, I didn't ask you because I knew you were him or anything! I asked you as Kozume—"

    "Right."

    "No, listen," You were panicking now, "I assure you, I didn't know until recently. I didn't even think... I never—"

    "What did you picture him as, (y/n)?"

    "What do you—"

    "I'm sure you pictured him as someone different, right? It must disappoint you that someone you admire is in fact, a regular college student—"

    "Don't say that! I really enjoy playing with you, and... I never even pictured how you'd look in the first place!"

    "Sure—"

    "Can we meet? Please, let me just—"

    "Not happening. It was nice playing with you, (y/n). I hope you get the platinum—"

    "Please, don't do this."

When Kenma hesitated, he knew that it was no longer an inconvenient crush. His fingers trembled and he couldn't look away from the television screen. His chest hurt and he was certain that his shirt was drenched.

    "Please, let's—"

    "Where do you want to... meet?"

    "Oh, thank goodness," Your genuine relief made him want to laugh, "I was so certain you'd hang up. Oh, thank god. Uh, I don't know. You live near campus?"

He narrowed his eyes, "What campus?"

    "Tokyo University?"

    "You go here too?"

    "Literature student! You go here? You mean to say the puddinghead0 goes to—"

    "Please, just never call me that, okay?"

    "Where do you want to meet?"

    "I... Just come to campus, we'll figure it out."

What normally took Kenma 12 minutes took him 17 now. He spent some time pacing back and forth on whether to go or not, before understanding that he couldn't back out after assuring you that he'd be there. He wondered if you would come as a fan or as his friend (were you his friend?), but the foremost thing that Kenma worried about was what your interaction with him would be about. Why did you want to meet him? What explanation did you want to give?

Maybe she wants to thank me, he thought as he walked forward, finally bucking up and realizing that he might actually need to meet you alone as himself.

He noticed that you were waiting outside the gates of the campus, airpods plugged in, head rocking lightly to some music that you were listening to. From a distance, you caught sight of him and waved almost hesitantly, shooting his heart to the skies. Your hair was tied in a messy bun and you were wearing anime merch, a Bakugou shirt with regular jeans. No matter what you wore, Kenma thought you were ridiculously pretty. Kenma had always thought you were pretty, from the very first video that you uploaded. He caught your stream in Kuroo's laptop when he had come over, and apparently it was your first time. You were hesitant and shy, but it gradually died down the more you played. Kenma found himself laughing so much that it alerted Kuroo, who had understood right away that you held a special place in Kenma's mind since no one could make Kenma laugh quite like you could.

When he was a few feet away from you, you looked at him awkwardly before he noticed you were red-faced. Is she... blushing?

    "U-Uh, yeah so uh," She was so nervous that it was making him feel weird, "I don't want to treat you differently but I just realized that I was gushing to you about puddinghead not knowing that you are, in fact, puddinghead and god, I feel like an idiot."

Kenma had to laugh at that before shaking his head, "It's fine, I don't get too many compliments anyway."

    "You had me simping all over you and you knock that down as compliments? Please teach me the art of modesty, senpai."

Kenma laughed some more before letting out a breath, rubbing the back of his neck. You were taking breaths now yourself; you were standing beside someone who had literally inspired you to start streaming gameplay, and you had no idea that you were playing alongside him all this while until he had practically confirmed it not too long ago. Of course, a part of you felt weird that he never told you himself, but perhaps he wanted to keep it a secret. Also...

He had been watching your streams. Kenma had admitted that as himself the first time you had met. You could practically die.

    "There's this cafe down this road," You said, suddenly feeling a lot bolder, "We won't have to stand around awkwardly then."

    "Alright."

The walk wasn't quiet, you were desperately trying to think of something to talk about, and you were mumbling a few things here and there about Bloodborne, and he commented back; but neither of you found your heart in the conversation and kept going because you didn't know how to handle the silence. While you admired Kenma, Kenma was also aware that you had no idea the feelings he had for you.

It made him feel a bit inadequate, and he wasn't sure how to take it.

When you reached the cafe, Kenma and yourself took the seats outside. You took in his appearance properly for the first time that evening; his hair tied in a messy, loose ponytail and wearing baggy clothing with black jeans and sneakers. Kenma was gorgeous, you wouldn't deny that, especially now that your heart was bubbling with excitement over how he was your YouTube idol. Strangely, his question rang in your mind:

What did you picture him as, (y/n)?

Your eyes softened at Kenma as he checked his phone for a minute; unable to look away. You stared at him the way folks stare at a rainbow, taking in all that unexpected beauty, not wanting to look away in case it might disappear. You felt yourself blushing when he looked up to meet your gaze, almost feeling time stop. But, you were too much of an overthinker to let that happen.

I'm sure you pictured him as someone different, right? It must disappoint you that someone you admire is in fact, a regular college student—

    "Kozume-kun," What am I doing? "I can't picture anyone but you."

He was now staring at you like you were an idiot mumbling rubbish. He gulped, you could see the rise and fall of his adam's apple, but he wasn't saying a word.

    "A few months ago, when I started the channel on Twitch, I could do it only because of you. You inspired me to upload my own gameplay because I now had a platform to be proud of it. But as Kozumu-kun, you gave me the courage to not only be proud of my gameplay but to see what's actually important," You smiled as you said, "Fun."

    "You're giving me way too much credit."

You shook your head, "We don't always realize how little exchanges that we have with people cause ripple effects. Playing with you these past few days reminded me of what streaming for views made me forget. Views don't matter, the fun does. I let those comments get to me because the views mattered to me, and they still do. But, that's not everything. I learned that from you."

Kenma didn't know what to say.

    "So when you figured out that I was... the YouTuber—"

    "Puddinghead—"

    "—Yeah, that. Didn't you think I lied to you?"

You shook your head, "You never had a face reveal, which meant that you wanted to keep it a secret. So why would I feel like you lied? You had every reason to—"

    "Stop being so fucking adorable, it's actually pissing me off." Kenma snapped without realizing.

Both of your eyes widened—Kenma's and yours—at the words that exited his mouth. Your face was flaming at what he said, and Kenma probably felt like a suicidal ostrich. He wanted to bury his head under the ground and never rise, for that would keep him away from the embarrassment that was due; he could hear Kuroo's laughter in the distance, which made it all the worse.

    "I'm... I'm not trying to be cute, you know?" You said, tilting your head a little, playing with a strand of your hair.

Kenma frowned at you, wondering now if you were doing it on purpose.

    "What are you... doing?"

    "There's a word for it!" You pointed an index finger in the air, "Hanker sore."

Kenma scoffed, "What's that?"

    "It's finding someone so attractive that it pisses you off."

Kenma blushed, "Y-You're not all that attractive, you just... come across as cute sometimes."

Your eyes widened, "I'm a catch!"

He bit his lower lip, "Yeah, sure."

    "Hey! I am a total catch, you could like totally fall for me!"

Kenma's heart skipped a beat, "Yeah, sure."

While you were sitting across him having a struggle over how he easily pushed away your claims, Kenma stared at you like you were all he could see, and as if you were a sight that he would forget if he didn't drink in your details at this very second. A moment later, you gasped before leaning forward.

    "I think we should get something."

    "Let's actually... go get your platinum."

Your eyes widened, "You... don't mind?"

He shook his head now that he was absolutely certain, "No, let's go back."

You were beaming and thanking him, acting as if he suddenly wasn't the YouTuber you had been simping after, treating him like a separate individual that he was, behaving as you would with anyone else; Kenma's worries dissipated in thin air, he was now confident that he had fallen in love with you, mind, body, and soul—your voice had ensnared and captured him, and now, your revelation had done the deed of claiming his heart.

    "Oh, and," Kenma said, "No one will know."

You nodded before throwing him a mock salute, "Of course!"

*

You were legitimately freaking out. 

Kenma had followed you as puddinghead on your professional Twitter and you had been staring at the screen for close to an hour now. You weren't sure if the reason for your heart to be beating the way it was was because Kenma was puddinghead or because you had finally learned what puddinghead looked like, but whatever it was, the feeling was intense.

Are these feelings romantic though? You wouldn't lie, before you knew puddinghead's face, you had pictured meeting him and dating him—the regular daydreaming that a person would do for the person they were simping after. And while those thoughts were innocent, now puddinghead had a name. Puddinghead was Kozume Kenma, an attractive college student, CEO of Bouncing Ball Corp, and YouTuber. Your mind was taking you to places, and juxtaposing your previous fantasies now with Kenma's face. No, no, no, you scolded yourself before covering your face with your hand. Yes, discovering his identity is huge, but don't forget, he thinks of you as a friend!

You were about to join his party on the PSN and co-op Bloodborne again, but all you could think about were how long Kenma's fingers were when they were placed on the table before you that day when you met him in the cafe.

You were practically out of it.

    "Hey, Kozume-kun!"

    "You know you can call me Kenma, right? I call you (y/n)."

    "O-Oh," Your face reddened uncharacteristically. "R-Really?"

You heard Kenma chuckle and your heart was ready to combust, "Yeah, what's there to think about?"

Oh dear lord, "Okay. Uh... So..."

     "So."

     "Uh."

    "(y/n)?"

Fuck, "K-Kenma-kun."

Kenma had his hand covering his jaw at how cute you sounded, but you were practically jelly yourself. It wasn't easy learning the identity of your internet crush and having to play with them as friends. It wasn't easy to accept these facts and to admit that maybe, just maybe, the person that they are in real life was equally attractive.

    "We have to beat the Shadows of Yharnam today."

Did his voice always sound like velvet?

    "Hm, I've heard they were relatively easy?"

    "No," He said chuckling, "To you, they're definitely going to be a challenge."

When he chuckles, I feel like I'll die.

    "Didn't you play against them without co-op?"

    "Oh, yeah," You could practically picture him rubbing the back of his neck, "I did co-op for Gherman in the end, though."

Fuck, he's so cute!

    "What?" Kenma asked, sounding confused.

    "What?"

    "You said 'he's so cute', you mean Gherman?" You gasped, "(y/n), he's... he's an old man?"

    "Y-Yeah! Haha, I mean... Yeah. It's... I was..."

Kenma laughed before asking you to continue before you slapped yourself for making such a big fool out of yourself. Snap out of it, you scolded yourself once more. You can't like Kenma-kun just because you know he's puddinghead.

But, did you?

As days passed, you exchanged numbers with Kenma. Texting him was relatively easy since he barely tried to keep the conversation alive and you just had so much to say. Sometimes, Kenma believed he might be boring, but you kept texting him as if his personality wasn't really that much of a bother. He wasn't much of a texter, and you had caught on, a fact that didn't actually bother you. Kenma, however, would never leave you on read, would try to reply within the hour even though he doesn't text as often.

Your mind, however, revolved around the heart he had once sent you as puddinghead.

You were re-reading the tweets almost every night, and juxtaposing the image of an empty face with Kenma's. For some reason, puddinghead's image was slowly erasing itself from your mind; you became less fascinated with the YouTube persona, but instead, looked forward to hearing from his real-life identity, trying to know more about his day, about his other interests, and having learned that he was from Nekoma blew your mind since he was from a rival school.

Kenma and you often met at the cafe again, just to grab a few snacks and talk about games. It would be you most of the time who would be initiating conversation, and Kenma would listen and retort when he felt the need to. However, not once did you feel like he wasn't listening; not once did Kenma make you think you weren't keeping him engaged. His eyes were on you, his intense gaze enough to burn you to the ground. It practically had you shivering.

Your mind, however, still continued to revolve around the heart he had once sent you as puddinghead.

    "I might need to go to a volleyball game soon—"

    "Why did you send me a heart?"

Kenma froze before meeting your gaze. "What?"

You almost wanted to slap yourself but you had said it. You couldn't hold it back, you couldn't keep mulling over your thoughts and therefore, you decided to tell the source of your problems what your problems were.

    "Kenma-kun, I... I had a big crush on puddinghead," Kenma's gaze on you was unwavering, "Now that I know you're puddinghead, and... and you were the one who sent me a heart, I... I've always thought you were cute and all—"

    "(y/n)—"

    "—and it's a bit unfair if I like you only because you're puddinghead, but I gave it a lot of thought—"

    "—(y/n), listen—"

    "—and I don't want you thinking that my feelings are just because you're a famous YouTuber and I just want to like... I don't know... I enjoy every second with you and slowly I just—"

Kenma's finger tapped your forehead, freezing you in position. His cat-like eyes were boring into your soul, and there he was, face inches away from yours, expressionlessly staring into you.

    "I've been in love with you for the longest time," Kenma's voice was gold, "No pressure, though."

    "No..." What the fuck? "N-No pressure?!"

Kenma laughed at your outburst, "Yeah, I mean... I took sometime accepting it, to even think that I liked you over the internet didn't make sense to me. And then we bumped into each other and we started gaming together and I guess I understood that your internet persona was just a part of you I'd liked, and now I like you more."

Oh.

Was it really that simple?

    "So... If I liked you as puddinghead—"

    "Please don't call me that."

    "—and if I like you as Kenma-kun, then..."

Kenma sighed before offering you a sweet smile, "It's probably the same thing, (y/n). Stop worrying."

    "Can I kiss you?" You blurted out, without thought.

God, this woman, Kenma thought, before covering his jaw with his hand.

*

In less than a week, you'd learned the route to Kenma's apartment by heart. You went over to game at his place, and slowly began streaming as (y/n) again on Twitch. You didn't want to stream with Kenma yet, because you guys had just started dating a month ago. For liking you longer than you liked him, Kenma was relatively cool about you hanging over at his, and about initiating any sort of touch—because your thoughts were practically spilling out of you and as cute as he once thought they were, he didn't want you to say 'pinch me' every time he kissed you.

Kenma's hands were buried into your hair as he kissed you fervently, softly at first before pulling back to see how flushed your face was. He'd never really imagined you being here, out of the screen he saw you from, in his arms, kissing him back.

He chuckled at the thought.

    "What's so funny?" You were legitimately a crackhead, but he adored you.

    "I thought having a crush on you was very inconvenient at first."

    "Why?"

He shrugged before pulling you to his chest, your face reddening at the contact. He noticed, but simply shook his head as you buried your face into his chest.

    "Because I thought it was too good to be true."

    "Am I the one freaking out each time or are you?"

    "Yeah, that part even I don't get."

You giggled before wrapping your hands around his neck, bringing yourself closer to him. Your face was at the crook of his neck, eyes closed as his arms were wrapped around your waist. You were both currently on Kenma's couch, nuzzling with each other on a lazy class-less Monday.

Suddenly, the door opened, revealing Kenma's roommate, in all honesty, did not know how to react when a famous Twitch streamer was lying asleep on his roommate. Kenma gave him a nonchalant look before placing a finger on his lips.

    "She's asleep."

    "Y-Yeah, that's definitely what I was thinking." The roommate said before rushing to his room and locking the door.

Well, Kenma thought before bringing his hand back around your waist, That's a problem for another day.

[cicaklah]

YA GIRL FINISHED HITMAN 3

AND I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS

1. The LEVELS my GOD they are all spectacular, 

DUBAI: this is the only one I didn’t like really, but I did like that they had an explanation in all the emptyish levels for why they’re empty, but Dubai felt a bit too much. This is possibly because I forgot how to run after 3 months of playing bloodborne and I just thought there was no running on the marble corridors. Anyway still a good level just not as good as the others.

Dartmoor: I played the mystery novel which was SO fun, the house was gorgeous, it was great just having 47 and Diana working together, will be interesting to see how it is after.

Berlin: OH MY GOD THIS LEVEL GAVE ME SO MANY FEELINGS, like god, this level, this setup, sneaking around, omg. Absolution was my first Hitman game and Hitman 3 felt like what made me fall in love with the series because it was so cinematic and high stakes, but then I almost cried when I walked down the deep stairs to the club because I miss clubbing, and those stairs remind me so much of my very favourite nightclub in the world, now long lost to history. I miss crowds!

CHONGQING: FUCK ME NEON AND RAIN AND 47 IN A FAMOUS BLUE RAINCOAT AND DID I MENTION THE NEON IN THE RAIN? I got SO lost and it took me WAY too many times to get into the vault and I loved every second of it. The 3AM rainstorm fanciness was just so well done and the city was so beautiful, this was my favourite level conceptually,

MENDOZA: THE FEELS HAVE BEEN WIRED TO MY ACCOUNT!!!! OBVIOUSLY AS A SHIPPER THIS GAVE ME CONNIPTIONS FROM THE START. I took like 500 pictures of Diana posing there in her beautiful dress cut all the way up to there???? And all through she kept snarking and just WATCHING 47 all along??? Their hands touched??? THEY DANCED THE TANGO???? I am going to 100% the hell out of this level if I can stop writing fanfic about those golden few hours between the dancing and meeting in the olive grove. 

THE TRAIN: Fun and again quite absolutiony which probably will be unpopular with the masses but ur girl enjoyed it and I will definitely try and silent assassin it because I ended up running through most of the office part due to accidentally getting compromised.

2. THE CUT SCENES!!! They were great. What can I say. SO SHIPPY. When Diana leans over 47 and then calls him Agent all cold and callous but still in her dress cut to there and her heels??? Still not over it. When she tells Edwards that she’s 47′s weakness??? When Olivia sees that they’ve been together for over 20 years and is like ‘wow okay I see why you’re devoted to her’, when he mutters to himself ‘time for a change’ ahhhhh goddamn these games.

3. The ending!!!! HE SMILED!!!! I am choosing to believe she’s out in the garden of her little cabin in the snow and they spent the rest of their lives happily banging with the world a safe place.

4. I like the camera but I keep forgetting to use it, but honestly its missing selfie mode, that I could not take a picture of 47 and Diana in black tie together is a crime I want my money back.

5. IO BABES! Oh obviously linking my account didn’t work so idk I’ll probably just keep my hitman 2 installation, but honestly IO did such a good job with this, it looks super great AND they did a VR conversion (which I am definitely going to buy a PSVR for at some point) I have no regrets about paying the most I’ve ever paid for a video game for this excellent, excellent game, now go knock the 007 game out the park and then make me moar hitman thanks xxxx

IN CONCLUSION WHAT A GAME NOW TO PLATINUM IT AND WRITE 100 FICS ABOUT MENDOZA BYE.

[foxingpeculiar]

Dark Souls (3) Diary:

Feeling quite self satisfied cos I BEAT NAMELESS KING!

It's still one of the more insane gaming challenges I've ever pulled off, but once I got the hang of it, the strategy was pretty simple. For the Lord of the Storm phase, just stay in front of him and pick hits carefully--the lightning slam is the easiest to punish. The fire breath is too, but unless I'm already close enough in, I have a hard time dodging that one, so I mostly held back. But pounding the shit out of the thing's face with a lightning +10 weapon staggers it pretty quickly, so it's not THAT bad as long as you can keep control of the janky-ass camera in this phase.

For the boss proper, keeping a middle distance and baiting his jump attacks was the strategy that worked for me. Wait for him to land, watch for a follow-up thrust and punish once or twice, then get the fuck out of swinging range. It took a while, but learning the tricks of the lightning phase (turning the camera away when he does the strike, strafing slightly to avoid the floor bolts after the slam) worked pretty well.

I got him down where three hits would kill him, but I had 1/5 health and no Estus left. I ran in for a YOLO kill and somehow pulled it off, but it was a gamble that had me on the edge of my fucking seat. Damn, that endorphin rush, though.

So after I go fight Hawkwood in Faron Keep, I'm off to Ariandel and we'll see how that goes. There are still a few notoriously rough bosses ahead (*cough*Midir*cough*) but I'm closing in on the end of this thing.

I am stoked to replay Bloodborne afterwards, though. I *squeaked* through it once before, but now having played all the Souls games, I'm feeling a little more confident about my trip to Yarnham, and I love the whole feel of the thing--plays right into my inner high school goth self. This time I have the Old Hunters DLC and I am fucking scared of Orphan of Kos, though. I've never tried it, but it's supposedly the hardest boss FromSoft has ever produced, so... eek.

After that, I'll try my hand at Sekiro again. I could never get the hang of it when I've attempted it before (I made it as far as Gyobu once and gave up in frustration), but maybe now I've got the skills to pay the bills, as the kids used to say.

[actualbird]

nobody asked but here are my personal top five pat gill videos | a 2.1k word long post where i rank and review pat gill’s videos for just way too long.

Right around the tail end of April, 2020, I fell into the rabbit hole of my current obsession; Polygon Dot Com Video Content. As a consequence of this was being introduced to the phenomenon of Pat Gill. A dire consequence of that consequence was me slowly, deeply, irrevocably, finding myself attracted to this marionette of a man. So, I enjoy his content and I think he’s hot and that combined with the fact that some of my friends bully me over that latter fact has inspired me to do this: rank my personal favorite Pat Gill videos in a post that’s entirely too long.

Before I get straight into the rankings, I need to explain my process. 

First, I needed to narrow my scope. Polygon has a lot of videos. Polygon has a lot of videos with Pat Gill in them. If I didn’t narrow my scope, I would either go bonkers yonkers or have a list that would be kilometric in length and thus miss the entire point of ranking altogether. So, for my sanity, I am excluding any videos that are a part of a Polygon video series. This means no Overboard, no Gill and Gilbert, no Video Game Theatre, etc. If I included these, I would cry. I do not want to cry over Polygon Dot Com Video Producer Pat Gill.

Second, I need a criteria. If I just ranked videos with no system, I would find myself endlessly rearranging my list based on whatever thought comes out on top in my mind at the given moment. I am a disorganized person, so I need rules. I have decided that I will rank Pat Gill videos using the EEEH criteria. 

Entertainment. Do I smile, watching the video? Do I chortle? Am I filled with the embarrassing urge to show this video to my sister and derive glee from her laughing at the exact same moment I laughed? Entertainment is key.

Education. Did I come out of this video knowing something I originally did not know? More importantly, was I engaged in the learning process? I come from a family of teachers, so I have high standards when it comes to education. If I am to learn, I must learn well.

Exaltation. This is a bit of an oddball criteria, but it is important to me. The word “exalted” is defined as “elevated in rank, character, or status.” This criteria refers to how good it is at exalting, elevating, pulling me out of a depressive episode. That is to say I’ve been in a depressive episode for the past month and whether or not the video made me stop crying and brush my teeth is essential. Polygon video content has been integral to my serotonin production lately, and thus the video’s ability of acting as an audiovisual antidepressant for me factors into the rankings.

[BONUS POINTS] Hotness. How Hot Is Pat Gill In It? I felt bad, morally, ranking videos based on how good looking I thought Pat Gill was in it---because beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and all that, and people don’t exist to be beautiful, they just are, and I agree---so I’m relegating this criteria as a bonus point. Standard is 0, because he’s always hot in my mind, but he gets plus points if he is exemplary in the hotness department.

The maximum score for each of these criteria is 5 points, making the perfect score a 15, but because of the bonus points, a 20 is, hypothetically, possible. 

With that out of the way, let me dive right into it. 

5. The fastest interview ever with Ben Schwartz from Sonic the Hedgehog

Entertainment: 5 Education: 2 Exaltation: 2 Hotness: +2 Total Score: 11

Pat Gill is a good interviewer, he’s engaging and fun and keeps the interview interesting, but this interview is particularly special because it seems that, and let me quote Youtube user AudreyN who left a comment on this video stating “ben schwartz consumed all seven chaos emeralds prior to this interview.” Pat Gill and Ben Schwartz’s dynamic is amazing, and by “dynamic” I do mean “Ben Schwartz absolutely just fucking dunking on Pat Gill for 14 entire minutes.” and it is glorious.

For Entertainment this scores a solid 5. Quite honestly the funniest interview I’ve ever watched in my entire life. Just the sheer beauty in the exchange [Pat] “You would use Sonic’s power to gaslight me?” [Ben] “Just you.” In terms of Education, I guess I did learn a bunch of things about the Sonic movie that I didn’t know before, but the avenue by which it was portrayed in was not exactly the most engaging, more like I was absorbing it via watching two experts discuss on a webinar. I would have given just 1 point to Education but I made it 2 because of the wonderful knowledge that Pat Gill can draw a pretty good Sonic in a few seconds. When it comes to Exaltation, I must admit that while this video got quite a few laughs out of me, it didn’t make me want to get out of bed and take a shower. 

BONUS: Pat is +2 hot in it. His short hair makes him look very handsome. He’s a spiffy boy, in this video. Very, very good.�� 

4. Pat Will Not Tweet at Nintendo This Week Because He is Resting at Home — PLEASE RETWEET, Episode 12 

Entertainment: 5 Education: 0 Exaltation: 5 Hotness: +1 Total Score: 11

I know I’m breaking a rule I set for myself a few paragraphs earlier by including an episode of Please Retweet, which counts as a video series, but this is my post and I can do whatever I want. More importantly, this video is so fucking funny to me, it feels like it would be a crime not to put it in this list. 

Solid 5 out of 5 for entertainment. Pat Gill, alone in his apartment, drinking six cans of what I think is beer silently while the intro music plays. That scene in itself should win an Oscar. Sadly, a solid 0 for Education, because I learn nothing in this video except for the fact that Pat Gill is the type of person to put out a coaster and then just completely not use it. I quantify things as educational if I can maybe answer a trivia question with them, and unfortunately, this fact does not pass that test. In terms of Exaltation, seeing Pat Gill lie down on the floor next to his cat made me get out of bed to do the same with my dog, and with myself thusly out of my bed cocoon of sadness, I was able to actually complete tasks on the day I watched this video. Perfect 5.

BONUS: Pat is +1 hot in this because there’s something very beautiful about him being a little bit miserable. However, I do miss his beard when I watch this video. It is one of my favorite things about him, and it is not present here.

3. Pat and Simone Play Human: Fall Flat

Entertainment: 5 Education: 1 Exaltation: 5 Hotness: 0 Total Score: 11

I very much enjoy Polygon’s gameplay streams. I often play them in the background while I’m doing other stuff like doodling or origami, but this stream is special. It is special because of the moment at 24:00 when Pat Gill, in game, swings a stereo into a glass window, shattering it, while saying, “Actually, y’know what? Let’s talk about trauma.” and then proceeds to tell a horrible and embarrassing story from his childhood where he had to do a rap about Ancient Egypt. 

5 points for Entertainment. This is partly because of Pat’s tragic childhood story about the Egypt Rap (and, segue just to point out 33:22 the incredible moment where you can hear Pat’s feral panic when Simone finds the lyrics to the Egypt Rap) but also because Pat and Simone just talking to each other is so deeply entertaining to me in a very comfy way. I’m starved for human interaction, in this quarantime, okay. Let me enjoy listening to other people have conversations while playing video games. Education scores a 1 because, again, nothing in this video will let me answer a trivia question, however it does get 1 point and not a 0 because the Egypt Rap’s lyrics are in the comments and I did end up learning stuff about Ancient Egypt that I didn’t know. A perfect 5 for Exaltation because this video showed me that talking about trauma can actually be cathartic, given that you’re trashing a video game living room at the same time, and I think that message of not bottling up your experiences really helped me, in these trying times.

BONUS: Pat Gill is not visible for the entirety of this episode, so he scores the standard 0. I’m sure he was hot. We just couldn’t see him.  

2. Why Bloodborne and Muppets are the same thing

Entertainment: 4 Education: 4 Exaltation: 3 Hotness: +2 Total Score: 12

Ah yes, one of Pat’s “x is y because of z” videos. He’s made a number of these and they’re all very good but this one is my favorite among them and earns a spot on this list because 1) I think puppets are cool and 2) I fucking love monsters. 

This video scores a 4 on Entertainment, just shy of perfect, because as funny as it is, it also gives me the vibe like I am being lectured by a professor who’s just a little bit off the shits. And we all know that lectures are supposed to be taken seriously. Which brings us to Education, which also scores a 4. I learned a lot in this video! Watching Pat Gill explain to me that children’s puppets and these horrifying viddy game monsters use the same character principles in different ways is not only very educational but is also explained in a streamline and easy to understand manner that I WISH some of the shitty professors at my old university could emulate. As for Exaltation, while this video did give me enough energy to have a meal, I did eventually end up back in bed for the night at 8pm crying myself to sleep, thinking “I’m like the slime scholar. Used to be a scholar. Now they’re slime.” 

BONUS: Pat Gill is +2 hot here. He’s rockin that basic ass monochromatic aesthetic and I love his look dearly. 

1. Preparing for Big Boy Season in Red Dead Redemption 2 

Entertainment: 5 Education: 3 Exaltation: 5 Hotness: +3 Total Score: 16

Here we are. My favorite non video series Pat Gill video. The video where Pat Gill tries to make Red Dead Redemption 2 protagonist, Arthur Morgan, large. 

Perfect fucking 5 for Entertainment, which I’m sure many may find odd. Afterall, this video is told in a serious investigative tone reminiscent of Vox’s videos on current issues. But that’s the glory of it. The complete and utter ‘playing it straight and serious’ for a ridiculous issue in a video game. It is high tier comedy in a subtle, understated way that sings to my comedy loving heart in a melody so lovely, so wonderful, that it urged me to give this video 5 points for Entertainment. It scores 3 on Education, because I have never played Red Dead Redemption 2, nor will I ever, but now I know things about it. The information was also relayed to me in a very interesting style, via something like a crime procedural, and thus it was engaging for me to absorb all this new knowledge. Exaltation scores a perfect 5 because of this video’s beautiful end about existential smallness. No joke, but hearing Pat Gill say “Our bigness isn’t measured in pounds, but in the impact we have on the people with whom we shared the world.” deadass made me want to talk to my friends again after conversationally isolating myself for 3 days. Preparing for Big Boy Season has a special place in my heart. And there it will stay.

BONUS: Pat Gill is not visible for most of the video but he does appear for like 15 seconds in the middle of it, and guess what. He’s hot. +3 hotness. Good beardage, good hair, all in all, good Pat Gill. 

So there you have it. My five favorite Pat Gill videos. If you read this whole thing, holy shit. You’re welcome, I guess.

[lilmissbeanie]

Navigation Haikyuu Masterlist

Tetsuro Kuroo x F!Reader. Fluffy Word Count ~ 4.3k Happy very late birthday to a dear friend of mine, I hope you had a great day girl! 

KozumeKenma is going live! 

The girl grinned at the notification that flashed up at the top of the screen of her phone. Her favourite streamer who she had been watching since he started streaming, she had just randomly found him playing some Minecraft years ago and decided to watch, she had been a loyal follower since that day, his streams always made her laugh and she loved how relaxed he was, she would often pop up in the chat, commenting on the game. Kenma had recognised her as one of his top fans, she had VIP status on his streams and he always said hi to her. Y/n had noticed that he was looking a little more run down recently, so she would often pop up telling him to hydrate or go get some food. She often used buying a treat for Kenma through streamer treats and he would often scold her for another pizza or ice cream Sundae, but Y/n knew he didn't mean it especially when it was her favorite pizza, she had been sending water with them too as the boy seemed to live on soft drinks. 

Opening her laptop she turned it waiting for it to load up, it usually took a little while now, she needed to get a new one, this one had to be about seven years old now so it was starting to get a little slow now but it still did the job for now anyway. While she waited, her fingers tapped against keyboard on her slightly cracked screen of her phone, 

Snowy Bluewolf: Happy wednesday! How are you?   

She heard Kenma chuckle, of course she was the first to message the chat. “Hey there, as always you are straight in the chat Wolfie.” Kenma gave a smile seeing her username, Snowy Bluewolf. “I’m good thank you, how is your lock down wednesday going?” 

Snowy Bluewolf:: Ah you know the usual, I got out of bed, moved to the couch to play on the ps4 and haven’t moved since unless to get food or another drink.   

“Ah, what have you been playing today?”   

Snowy Bluewolf: Just some bloodborne, still terrible at the game 

He chuckled, “It is a hard game wolfie, the offer still stands, anytime.”  She smiled, she had told him she had started playing bloodborne over the lockdown and that she was finding the game incredibly difficult and he had offered to help her out if need be. 

Snowy Bluewolf:: I heard orphan is a bitch to beat so I will give that one a few tries and then I may take you up on the offer! Thanks, Kenma!   

“Okay, the rest of you, stop being jealous, you all know Wolfie has been here since day one and she is super loyal follower so of course I’m going to talk to her!” Kenma rolled his eyes playfully at the jealous messages in chat, Kenma looked dead in the camera with a playful look in his golden eyes as he teased the rest of his followers “She is also one of my mods so watch it.”   

The girl laughed, she had never abused her power as a mod in his discord or in the twitch chat she only kicked those who didn’t obey the rules. She also was friends with Kenma. On discord they were quite good online friends now and they do play games together in private and they do have quite a laugh together.   

“Right let’s get on with the stream!” Kenma said getting straight into the game.   

Y/n had gotten her laptop all set up and ready now, she lounged out on the sofa, getting comfy for the Animal Crossing New Horizons stream.  She would lurk in the chat making sure that everyone was behaving, she rarely had to time out anyone, but she liked to keep an eye making sure everyone is behaving, over the eight years she has been a part of Kenma’s streams and been a mod she had only have to ban about a couple hundred people though she had timed out a lot more than that, she reckons she has hit over the thousands or more.   

She smiled as she watched Kenma update his island, trying to make it five stars, he had built his orchard, a zen garden and a flower garden, it was looking quite stunning so far. Had been streaming about an hour and half when she noticed he had yet to have a drink.   

Snowy Bluewolf: Oi, Kenma! Hydrate would you, have some H2O smh 

“Ergh, Wolfie you are starting to sound like my friend Kuroo.” He sighed, grabbing his water bottle, and having a drink. “Always telling me to drink something...” He tightens the cap on the bottle.   

Nekomasbestcaptain: I heard my name? What shit are you saying about me now? 

Y/n giggled at the fact his best friend had been lurking in Kenma’s stream this whole time, Y/n knew of Kuroo his best friend but had never spoken to him even as a mod all these years. “Nothing Kuroo, just saying Wolfie is as bad as you, reminding me to hydrate.”   

Nekomasbestcaptain: Wolfie? Oh, you mentioned her before. One of your mods, right? 

Kenma glanced at the chat quickly, before replying, “Yep.”   

Snowy Bluewolf: @Nekomasbestcaptain hi! I am the one making sure he stay’s hydrated and that he eats 

Nekomasbestcaptain: @Snowybluewolf haha thanks he does forget like all the time.   

For the rest of the stream Kuroo and Y/n chatted and flirted back and forth, Kenma rolling his eyes at his two best friends. 

To: Kenma  From: Kuroo  Sent: 04:14pm  Dude, how can I talk to wolfie other than through your streams? 

To: Kuroo  From: Kenma  Sent: 08:17pm  Discord.   

Kuroo had never downloaded an app so quick in his life, he created his account, got Kenma’s discord tag added to him then begged him to allow him to join his discord server before tracking down Y/n and private messaging her.   

The months of lockdown flew past, Y/n and Kuroo bonding over the course of three months, they had gotten to the point they would video call in bed usually with Y/n falling asleep while they chatted which he found super cute. 

Nekomasbestcaptain: Hey, Y/n seeing as lockdown is finally over, did you, maybe fancy going for dinner?   

Kuroo sat at his desk in his home office as he chewed on his lip as watched her name pop up at the bottom of the chat bar in discord, before disappearing and reappearing again.   

Snowy Bluewolf: Sure (*ﾉ▽ﾉ) I would love too. Rather than going out for now, maybe we could have a stay at home dinner, like we each cook a course and share one? 

The grin was spread across both their lips as they stared at their phones, the crushes they had developed over the past few months had come clear and they had slyly admitted it to one another and Kenma hated how they were with each other yet loved it cause they both deserved to be happy. Kuroo’s eyes sparkled as he read the message. 

Nekomasbestcaptain: Sure, who’s place shall we do it at? I don’t mind travelling to yours.   

Snowy Bluewolf: We can do it at my place and I’ll pop out and buy the food for the mains if you don’t me doing that course.   

Nekomasbestcaptain: Sounds like a plan. I'll make the starter and we could have a cheese board for dessert? 

Snowy Bluewolf: You are talking my language rooster boi! So, friday? 

Nekomasbestcaptain: Friday is perfect, 6?   

Snowybluewolf: 6 is perfect, I’ll send you my address on friday 

Y/n couldn’t help but squeal she had a date with this beautiful man, it may be a home date, but she had a date. Kuroo flopped back in his desk chair, he had done it he had finally asked her out.   

Friday rolled around in a flash both arguing over who was buying the cheese, in the end Y/n won to buy the cheese and crackers but Kuroo said he would be buying the wine. Y/n decided to make a sushi from scratch, Y/n wasn’t going to admit it, but she did want to show off a little. She had all the equipment she needs to make sushi at home she had just never used the sushi kit she had brought. 

Kuroo had spent days trying to work out what he would make for the starter, he finally decided on tempura. He wanted to make a mix of vegetables and fish. He knocked on her door, with a few bags in hand.   

The door opened shortly after, he was met by a h/c haired girl, her e/c eyes peering up at him, with a shy smile on her face, “Hey rooster boy.”   

“Hello Chibi-chan,” Since he discovered she was the same height as Kenma he had begun to call her Chibi-chan, he loved how a light blush covered her cheek bones. He smiled at her leaning down pecking her forehead, not chancing more yet seeing as this was the first date. Biting her lip, she stepped back gesturing for him enter, trying not let the blush erupt over her cheeks from the feeling of his lips against her forehead. It was a small innocent gesture that caused goosebumps erupted over her skin as she knew the small peck had a deeper meaning behind it. The pair had become comepletely and utterly smitten with one another.   

Showing him into the open plan kitchen sitting room “Can I get you anything to drink?” She asked leaning on the counter, “I brought some wine with me” Kuroo grinned pulling a bottle of wine out of one of the bags. Y/n smiled in return, opening the cupboard by the fridge pulling out to large crystal-clear wine glasses, while opened the bottle with the corkscrew. “What have you planned for starters?”   

Tetsu gray orbs met hers as he poured them a glass each, “I was thinking of making Tempura. What are you doing for mains?”   

The girl took a sip of the wine and sighed, her eyes widening at the smooth taste coating her tongue and the velvety texture running down her throat, “Well I was goinf to make sushi but I’m thinking screw the starter and mains and let’s just have a cheese and wine night, Tetsu this wine is delicious what is it?”   

“Cabinet Sauvignon by a California vineyard called dark horse,” Kuroo swirled the wine in his glass before smirking “and I won’t say no to a cheese night.”   

Y/n emptied out the carrier bags taking everything that needed to go in the fridge and placing it there, before giving him a playful look with raised eyebrows at the 3 other bottles of wine she removed from the bags. “Tetsurou are you planning to get me drunk this evening?”   

“What?” Elongating the word, “No! Whatever gave you that idea?!” He gasped, placing a hand over his chest struggling to keep the fake offended look on his face, before they both cracked up laughing, the pair relaxing in each other presence for the first time that evening. 

“So, cheese and wine night?” The nod of Kuroo’s head joined with the twinkle in his eye was all Y/n need to grab one of her wooden chopping boards, the crackers from the cupboard before she pulled the fridge door open and snatching the selection of cheese, she had brought earlier that day from the fromagerie, the strong-smelling shop contained a wide variety delicious French cheese. 

Y/n wasn’t sure what kind of cheese Kuroo would like she got some milder ones as well as some strong ones, the milder ones being those like brie, camembert and cantal, a cheddar like cheese, the stronger ones like Roquefort and stilton. She had gotten quite a mix of hard and soft cheese too. Taking all the cheese out of their respective wrappings before placing them on the wooden board.   

Kuroo watched each of her movements carefully from his seat at the breakfast bar, she did everything so gracefully and he was awestruck by how beautiful she was, he already thought she was when they video chatted but seeing her in person was a whole other ball game. He watched as she stood on her tiptoes, reaching into the cupboard to get down two small side plates, her flowing red blouse riding up slight allowing him to catch a glimpse of her smooth looking s/c skin of her waist. The way she bent over as she rummaged through the fridge looking for something, gave him perfect view of her arse in her skin-tight dark blue Levi's over the rim of his wine glass as he took another sip. He glanced away as she straightened up, turning around with some chutneys in hand, making it seem like he was admiring the apartment rather than the owner of it.

“Did up want to sit here or move to the sofa?” She asked gesturing towards the dark blue loveseat with a pair of matching armchairs that was placed opposite a flat screen TV on that was mounted to the wall with a light oak sideboard under it, he could see through the glass of the doors that it contained a PlayStation four, Nintendo switch and a range of games and DVDs, separating the two was a coffee table that matched the sideboard, light oak with a glass top. “Sure, the sofa sounds good.”   

Kuroo grabbed the two glasses wine and made his way after y/n to the sofa as she made her way over to the coffee table with the wooden board with the cheese on before they both when to grab the condiments and utensils.   

“Hey, google, shuffle wake up and smell the coffee.” Y/n called out to her google home which sat on the side board under the TV. 

“Okay, I’ll shuffle the Spotify playlist wake up and smell the coffee.”   

The gentle strumming of the guitar of Comethru by Jeremy Zucker played threw the Google home. The pair got comfy on the loveseat, letting the music flow through the apartment, they both snacked on the cheese and biscuits chatting and talking about their days at work. “It’s nice to not having to go into the office that often yet I do procrastinate while I’m at home.”   

“Oh god I am just the same and Kenma is not helping when he streams when I am trying to work.” The girl laughed as she sipped at her wine enjoying the smooth texture.

“I have Kenma’s streams playing as background noise these days myself.” Kuroo added with his own deep chuckle as he watched the girl drink her wine and the way the tip of her tongue darted out over red full lips, temptated to kiss them to discover how soft they are , “This one is nice.” Kuroo said grabbing another cracker with some brie with the fig chutney, Y/n hummed agreeingly in response as she had her own mouthful of blue cheese and cracker, taking a sip of her wine before responding, “The fig chutney does go well with brie, try the blue cheese with a sip of wine.”   

He did as she suggested and his eyes widened at the mixture of mouth-watering tastes, “damn that’s good.” He grabbed another chunk of the blue cheese, placing it on his plate and grabbed another cracker. The cheese board didn’t last long between them even with the six different cheeses they keep eating until there wasn’t even a crumb left. 

“Whoa, I’m stuffed.” Kuroo sighed as he flopped back on the cushions of the sofa, they had finished a bottle of wine and began the next. Copying his movement, Y/n made herself comfy on sofa, the music still softly playing in the background, 1994 by Alec Benjamine harmony filled the room. “God, I love cheese nights.”   

“I have decided, this,” He gestured to the empty plates, board and the bottles wine “Shall become our first tradition. We will have regular cheese nights.” Kuroo said, nodding in agreement with his own decision with a proud smile. A gentle smile crossed her rosy lips again, the look in her jewel-like eyes holding a matching look, nodding in agreement with his idea. Their first tradition, Y/n was filled with giddiness and tried not to squeal at the fact he wanted to start making traditions with her, “I’d like that.” 

His grey eyes watching as she curled her legs up under herself, her left elbow resting on the back of the couch, her chin resting on her on the palm of that hand and in her right hand held the wine glass which rested on her knee. The small ball jumping up on the sofa between them broke him out of his trance of checking her out. His eyes landed on the black kitten whose large blue eyes were briming with curiosity. “Oh, there you are Luddy.” Sitting up slightly, the h/c leaned forward enough to gently pet the kitten, the second Y/n fingers met the top of his head, Luddy began to purr, his blue eyes closing in contentment.   

“Did you have a nice sleep baby?” Y/n cooed to the bundle of fur starching behind his ear making him lean into his touch, Kuroo was in awe as he watched her coo over the small creature. “Do you want some dreamies?” The kittens eyes seem to fly open at the word dreamies as if he understood what his own had said, he looked at her and gave her a small meow. Y/n giggled placing her glass down on the coaster before standing up. 

“Okay you make friends with Tetsu while I grab the dreamies.” Starching the back of Luddy’s head, Y/n gathered up the plates and knifes an placed them on the wooden board along with the chutneys and taking them to the kitchen, leaving Kuroo and a kitten staring at one another, molten grey eyes staring into inquisitive sapphire blue ones. In the background you could hear dishwasher being loaded and the opening and closing of cupboards as Kuroo gently reached a handout allowing the small cat to sniff his calloused fingers, from all those years playing volleyball, before Luddy rubbing up against the man's large hands purring, he stood up walking over to Kuroo sitting down on his lap, allowing Kuroo to continue to pet him, purring happily at the affection. Y/n watched the interaction from the kitchen smiling, before shaking the bag of dreamies, causing Luddy’s ears to prick up and turn to look where the sound came from, he jumped over the back of the sofa trotting his way towards the sound of the treats. Kuroo watched as Y/n opened a ball with a few holes in it, pouring the treats in, shutting it and placing it on the floor for Luddy who ran up to it and batted the ball across the room causing the treats to fall out of the holes. Y/n walked back over to the sofa, grabbed her glass of wine off the table, taking a seat next to Kuroo, whose arm was resting across the back of the sofa, where she was sat it looked like it was placed around her shoulders. Trying his luck, he placed it around her shoulder and tugged her into his side, “Come ‘ere.” To which she responded to his tug by curling into his side, head resting on his chest while he drew gentle circles on her shoulder happily relaxing into the sofa with her curled up to him.   

It was peaceful as the pair led there on the sofa curled into one another, the only sound in the room was Luddy’s ball rolling around and the music still quietly playing, “This is nice Tetsu,” Humming in agreement, he kissed the top of her head allowing his lips to linger inhaling in her soft scented shampoo. He could get used to this, ruining the perfect scene was a loud ringtone going off.

"Is Kenma really streaming at this time?” The girl sighed untangling herself from Kuroo to get her phone from the kitchen counter where she had left at the start of the evening. “Ya know, he only lives around the corner,” Y/n turned to look at Kuroo confusingly as her eyes met with his that held a mischievous glint, “and I have a key.” 

Y/n confusion turned into a smirk as she caught onto what Tetsuro was planning, her eyes brighten up and nodded in excitement, this would be the first time she was meeting her favourite streamer and she would gate crashing his apartment with his best friend. “Can we stop and buy food and drinks for him? I bet he hasn’t eaten.”   

Kuroo couldn’t help but be just as enthusiastic as her, seeing her excited was contagious and made him just as excited. “Of course, we can” He smiled pulling on his shoes and jacket as Y/n did the same. “Luddy be good while we’re gone. Mummy loves you baby.” She blew a kiss towards the kitten who was sat on the sofa looking at the pair with a bored look in his eyes as they stepped out of Y/n apartment door. They made their way to local convenience store fingers entwined together as they searched for Kenma’s favourite soft drink and a few bottles of water before going to the pizza takeaway and order the largest pizza they could with Kenma’s favourite toppings. Y/n couldn’t believe how close they lived together, Kenma live barely 2 streets over, they had the same local takeaways and supermarkets she was surprised they had never bumped into one another before.   

Kuroo entered the code to Kenma’s apartment building, saying hi to the kind looking receptionist who knew him very well with how often he visits his best friend, Y/n sent a wave to the lady behind the desk who returned it with a smile. “Back to see Kenma I see Kuroo, and who is this?” 

“Hi, yep!” He popped the p “This is Y/n she is my girlfriend and actually I met her through Kenma streams she’s one of his mods and he decided to stream during out first date so we thought we would come and crash his stream” The lady giggled and nodded, noticing the blush that exploded over h/c girls cheeks as she heard Kuroo tell the receptionist that she was his girlfriend. “Pleasure to meet you Y/n have fun crashing his stream.”   

“pleasure to meet you too. And thank you we shall.” The girl replied with a smile as Kuroo tugged on their entwined hands towards the elevator, he hit the button for the eighth floor and watching the doors close as the pair made their way up to his floor, Kuroo fished his set of keys out of his pocket, “So we’re going to sneak in and sneak to his stream room and throw the door open and yell at him to hydrate right?” 

“That’s the plan.” The girl nodded bouncing on the balls of her feet. She was so excited to do this. The bell ding in the elevator signalling they had arrived at the eighth floor, stepping out the made in along to apartment 803, Y/n took the carrier bag from Kuroo’s hand as he slipped the key into the lock carefully turning it to unlock the door quietly, they slipped inside stylish modern apartment, they both took there shoes and jackets off, placing the bottles of water and one of his soft drink bottles on the counter, before sneaking there way towards Kenma’s stream room.   

Showing three fingers Y/n began the silent countdown, She knew the whole stream would see this as Kenma had recently moved his stream room around so his back was now facing the door.  

3...  

2...  

1...  

Kuroo threw the door open “YO KENMA! HYDRATE!” The pair yelled at the same time, they watched as the streamer jumped five foot in air out of fright and the stream chat was moving at a mile a second asking what was going on. Kenma pulled his cat ear headphones off his head placing them down on his desk slowly turning around in his desk chair to find Kuroo leaning against the door frame one arm around his date and in his other hand was his Kenma’s drink while Y/n was snuggled into his side with the pizza box in hand. Both of their face held large cheeky grins.

“Kuroo? Wolfie?” He questioned, Kuroo was the first to speak between the couple, “This what you get for crashing our date with your stream”   

“Oh, so now I have to plan my streams around your dates?” Kenma sassed them. The h/c cocked an eyebrow before replying, “Yep, you do.”  

Kenma laughed at her response, watching as the pair stepped into the room, Y/n thrust the pizza box into his hands “bet you haven’t eaten yet tonight so here it’s your favourite.” Before she pushed his chair with him in it out of the way and crouching down to be eye level with the webcam seeing herself in the video, of the stream managers on Kenma’s second monitor, “Hey chat! It’s me, Wolfie! You best be all behaving while I am not there to mod you” She winked into the camera, noticing Kuroo making his way over to her kneeling down behind her, he was still taller than her, he placed his chin on his head, reading what the chat was saying.   

It was exploding with laughter over how they made an entrance, to how pretty Wolfie is and how handsome Kuroo was. “He is handsome isn’t he but hands off he’s mine.” Y/n replied sticking her tongue out at the chat.  

“This gorgeous girl is mine so back off lads I can see yall eyeing her up.” Kuroo growled out playfully.

Kenma just sat in his chair chopping happily on his pizza while shaking his head at his two best friends who had just stolen all the limelight of his stream, which had gone from a Bloodborne stream to just chatting in a matter of seconds, with a gentle smile on his face glad they were happy together.

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©️ All content  belongs to lilmissbeanie, do not copy, edit, repost or translate. 

[demons-fanatic]

The Choir: Chloral Madmen or Misguided Fools?

Spoilers for Bloodborne below for the entire post:

So, for my first lore post here, I wanted to keep it within the season. Believe it or not, the Choir is quite a scary prospect of Yharnam when you look at it in depth. First of all, what is the job of the Choir? As their set states outright: “Members of the Choir are both the highest-ranking clerics of the Healing Church, and scholars who continue the work that began at Byrgenwerth.“ This means the choir continues in Eldritch Knowledge and the pursuit of ascension in the path of Master Willem and not Laurence. The origin of the Choir is also explicitly stated with the Orphanage Key: “Key to the Orphanage, birthplace of the Choir. The Orphanage, shadowed by the Grand Cathedral, was a place of scholarship and experimentation, where young orphans became potent unseen thinkers for the Healing Church. The Choir, that would later split from the Healing Church, was a creation of the Orphanage.“ This explicitly tells us that the Choir are just Orphans who grew up and were taught to essentially experiment on people their whole lives, along with a lot of Eldritch Knowledge. If you’re wondering where the rest of the Choir is well, presumably they’re in the third floor of the Upper Cathedral Ward main building. It’s a fact that some of them are there, given that singing can be heard, arias specifically. These aria’s are supposed to be religious-like thing, given by the Rosmarinus’ description: “A special weapon used by the Choir, high-ranking members of the Healing Church. Sprays a cloud of sacred mist, created by using blood-imbued Quicksilver Bullets as a special medium. Arias are heard wherever sacred mist is seen, proving that the mist is a heavenly blessing.

‘Oh, fair maiden, why is it that you weep?’”  It is seen as something of the heavens, the heavens being something the Choir, or really the church believe in. These heavens might be the Nightmare realms in the other planes of existence. The mist is made from Quicksilver Bullets, aka Mercury and Mercury in Bloodborne deserves its own post but it’s essentially Mercury gas, in which Oedon loves Mercury. The last line “Oh, fair maiden, why is it that you weep?” this maiden is the Great One below in the cave, but we’ll get to her later. Now, what do the Choir do? Well, they experiment on people to, as Fauxsefka puts it “Surpassing our own stupidity.” these experiments create Kin. These experiments are the Celestial Emissaries. And why are they called “Emissaries” well, it’s presumable they are used to contact Great Ones. How do we know this? Well, they drop communion. The boss does anyways. Meaning that they have contacted a higher truth. All the places we find communion, minus +5 vials, is in relation to some sort of religious place/person. Where communion has or could take place. 

The Choir also is said to now be separated from the Healing Church itself and with this they have just become a separate name. They are still apart of it, just not the Healing Church conglomerate. This means that the Choir gets their “patients” from the Church who of course, just kidnap Yharnamites. Another faction that has separated from the church is the School of Mensis, who preform a similar function to the choir, but they do not experiment on people in the same way, their wish is though, is to reach Kos and end the Curse of Hunters. The Choir is very suspicious of the School, sending a spy, Edgar to the school in hopes of sharing secrets, though, due to the Mensis ritual, he got stuck in the Nightmare Realm. The choir’s suspicions aren’t for naught though, Mensis is doing something and killed an entire village to try and create an artificial Great One, which worked half-way.

Another aspect of the Choir to note is their clothing. Which the cap is the most interesting part. “Attire of the Choir, high-ranking members of the Healing Church. Members of the Choir are both the highest-ranking clerics of the Healing Church, and scholars who continue the work that began at Byrgenwerth. Together with the left behind Great One, they look to the skies, in search of astral signs, that may lead them to the rediscovery of true greatness.“ This states that the Choir outfits are inspired by Willem, why they choose not to see is a common concept. It’s not rare in Yharnam to cover ones eyes so that you can gain eyes on the inside and ascend. Their attire looks very special and like Choir wear, nothing special there but it is apart of the Choir.

Another interesting part of the Choir is their tools. Their tools include: Rosmarinus, Choir Bell, A Call Beyond and Augur of Ebrietas. Minus the Rosmarinus, they are all Arcane items. Meaning they are understood by few, but they also incorporate, for the lack of a better word, magic in their use. The Choir Bell is based on a larger bell that can send a sound across multiple planes of existence. This one just uses its sound to raise vigor/heal someone. A Call Beyond was created when the Healing Church failed to contact the greater Cosmos using Phantasms, but instead summoned a small exploding star. Finally, the Augur of Ebrietas uses a similar tactic to A Call Beyond. It uses a phantasm but it uses it to partially summon Ebrietas, using one of her tentacles to shoot out of ones hand. All of these weapons use the cosmos and are the latter two are considered secrets, for good reason. They do use it in combat, Yurie, Fauxsefka and Edgar all use it. Along with Micolash(Who would’ve been apart of the Choir but split in Mensis). 

Another thing the Choir is continuously said to do is look at the sky or mention how the sky is one with the Cosmos. This, of course, is also something they most likely took from Willem as when we find him in Byrgenwerth, he is literally staring at the sky forever. Doing this seemingly does do something as Willem is growing some sort of Fungus on his neck which isn’t natural. He’s also lost his ability to speak in a normal human tongue. Though, the Choir either haven’t done it long enough or as expected, have just used other methods to achieve this. Of course, the experiments are these ways. Once you understand that in this world that these Gods exist, you’re either afraid or in awe. How the people of Bloodborne even figured out you can transcend is beyond me, but. They figured it out and now they wish to do so. Multiple ways of doing it have been shown in the game whether it be drinking God Blood, Water, Eating Organs or becoming too Enlightened. And all of this, as we know are connected to Aliens. Beings from Space. There is a reason the Moon Presence is called the Moon Presence after all, did she come from the Moon? Who knows, but she always descends from it, meaning she is not from Earth and comes from space. Not to mention some aspects of the Choir magic as listen above are well, space related. Stars. Yes, it is strange they just realized that the sky leads into space but it helps in the fact they most definitely worship the moon a lot. Hell, they even have statues of the Moon Presence.

These can be found in Lumenflower Gardens and most definitely suggest that the Choir worship or really appreciate her in which one makes sense over the other. With this, and other descriptions, the Choir are really obsessed with the Moon, in the same theme of the Lumenflower Gardens, the flowers open in full Moonlight. We also know the church has always participated in rituals with a Great One, mostly the Moon. So this obsession with space, Great Ones, it’s all religious. It’s sacred, holy, divine, etc... This isn’t surprising of course, all Great Ones are considered Gods. The Choir themselves have a connection to one of these Gods, Ebrietas.

Now, since we are talking about the Choir and Isz and Ebrietas are apart of the Choir, I will 1. Talk about them as if they are the same(Isz less so) and 2. Go into full detail about them. 

First off we have Isz, a land that the Choir themselves consider to be in touch with the Cosmos. It is a land that is filled with Moon Larvae(Most likely where most of the ones in Upper Cathedral Ward come from) Celestial Emissaries and other Kin. It’s infested with a blue hue and arcane tree roots. This of course, going along with the themes of Bloodborne proves that well, all of this has already played out. Isz has already done what the Choir has done, the Choir is just repeating Isz. There’s even a human(or Pthumerian; Iszian?) who has become a Great One, but we’ll get to her later. But yes, this is just proof everything is repeating, like Loran and Yharnam. It is also notable that Isz houses most Great Ones we see as bosses, which brings to effect 1. These Chalices are Pocket Dimensions, Rom has no place being here. 2. These Chalices are existing so the Great Ones shall keep their forms stored so they cannot die, they can revert back to their other form and regenerate so to speak and then come back. Isz just seems to possibly be the main hub for that. Regardless, that is Isz. And relation to the Choir, well, they found the chalice and explored it and then came into contact with Ebrietas.

Now we have Ebrietas, Daughter of the Cosmos. She is called a Great One in many places, but is she? Well, it’s confusing. All true Great Ones bleed red, like Humans. But, all Kin bleed White, Mercury. But, what does Ebrietas bleed? Red and White. What does Rom bleed? Red and White. What is Rom? A Human who has transformed into a failed Great One. From the previous paragraph, we established cycles in Bloodborne. This isn’t a joke or false, this is true. Think about it; Loran, Old Yharnam and now Yharnam all were infected by the Beast Plague. It happens again and again. Isz and now the Choir, it’s happening again and again. The Fishing Hamlet and now Mensis with Mergo, again and again. If this isn’t proof, well, I don’t know what to tell you. This is even more explicit than Dark Souls. Anyways, along with this would be another failed attempt at a Great One, right? Well, of course, why couldn’t it? Ebrietas is like Rom, she can cast her own magic and looks like a Great One. Anyways, take that theory with what you will. So, what does Ebrietas do in our current story? Well, she was found in Isz by the Choir. It’s said she was left behind, if you believe my theory you’ll know why. She’s not like the others, she cannot ascend to other planes like the others can because she’s not full, so to speak. So, she was found and luckily for the Choir, she wanted to coexist with humans. Why she does isn’t known but, she soon became a thing for the Choir to study, but presumably they did nothing bad to her and even gained a good relationship with her. She stays in a cave below the Grand Cathedral, called the “Altar of Despair” and currently she’s weeping over a dead corpse of a giant Spider. 

And, this is where I deviate from current lore to cut content, well. See, that Giant Spider is Rom. It’s honestly, should I say an extremely bad mess up, like really, really bad. Because in current game, it makes no sense. This giant spider that looks like Rom is here but it’s not really Rom? And you can reverse Annalise’s death here? What? Well, if you want to know, it’s Rom and the Altar used to be below Byrgenwerth, Rom would fall and then Ebrietas would be sad her “sister” is dead. There’s also a cutscene associated with her corpse, but nevertheless, there we go. You might be asking, “Why is this important” well, there’s no good explanation for it other than to explain why it’s there when the area was being developed.

But that’s the end of the rant, so the Choir are children who have been raised to experiment on people and elevate humanity. Of course, they aren’t the only ones who do so but they definitely are making progress. If you read all the way through, thank you! Feedback and RB’s are appreciated!

[plasmavamp]

[cracks knuckles, breaks hands]

aight fam here’s the official catch-up post to whatthefuck lolita’s been up to in the sims 4 (and continuing from where i left off in my DU posts lol)

featuring Nasier, Caleb and Morgyn ~

[ nasier belongs to my bestie, Mav @mavesathesimblr​ !! ]

caleb and nas actually started dating early on in college ! nothing crazy happened uwu that yall know of lol, but yeah. spent 4 years as dorm roommates. around year 4 morgyn came to visit caleb a couple of times and hung out with the boys ^^ Nas and Caleb stayed in-dorm for the last winterfest (and other holidays) of college. caleb graduated a bit before nas did lol

the boys moved to strangerville shortly after graduation!! caleb lowkey isnt a fan of the neighbors but he knows how they get lol. morgyn moved in with them not too long afterwards ^^ 

(third pic is an edit i might post late btw)

morgyn was in a kinda-relationship with caleb before he went to college, btw. kinda meaning they knew each other and and might have had feelings. well, with the feelings still present and the three of them having some type of chemistry, it was agreed for the three of them to date together ^^ Caleb hasn’t decided how he feels about drinking human blood but, he’s trying lol. His plasma trees are bountiful but Nas is being a good bf and just wants to help his bro out. Also, Lilith came to beat up Caleb for ignoring her texts and calls and invites all the damn time (she lowkey harassed him but she just wanted to check on him lol)

Caleb’s been leveling up his vampire abilities basically; he’s already a grandmaster but he still had shit to learn tbh. Morgyn developed a garden in the back and decided it was a good idea to have a cowplant. The cowplant was adorable (but it ate morgyn and nas twice lol). Also, Morgyn and Nas got closer and decided to become boyfriends as well rather than sharing Caleb uwu ~

speaking of trying human blood out, Morgyn started volunteering to help Caleb out with that. Turns out he temporarily borrows their magic lol.

the boys have jobs btw! Nasier is a marine biologist (using his college degree for good use), Caleb went into acting, and Morgyn is a scientist! (still cant believe Caleb’s very first acting gig [shown] was him being Mario. Its funny bc Caleb’s italian lol, but the gig was the vlad straud handyman gig lmao)

caleb’s early acting gigs were lowkey lame but my favorites were the handyman and pirate gigs tbh o: but here’s a few of his early parts lol. (He started straightening his hair again by the time he was in the apocalyptic movie!)

they also adopted some pets! Tod is a fox, Sparky is the cat—you can see more of Sparky here c: He’s Morgyn’s familiar hehe. [casually inserts “Fox & the Hound” ref for Tod and Nas lol]

Morgyn literally is best friends with the damn aliens. These pics are 3 different occasions, and they got abducted six times so far u.u thankfully morgyn is unable to bring any aliens back with them fjhgjhff

Nasier had leveled up to 10 in his career already and basically was making bank at this point. Caleb won his first award for the apocalypse movie!! and Morgyn was hard at work and building all of the things o:

After winning his award, Caleb hit career level 10 as an actor and had his acting skill leveled up as well, so he stepped away and went into the medical career (thanks to Mav for the suggestion lmfao). Before starting his new job, the boys went on vacation to Granite Falls. Caleb was moody one day, it thunderstormed the next day (caleb and nas got spooked but morgyn deadass stayed outside to watch the weather). Overall they had fun hehe.

some time had past, caleb and morgyn bumped up in their careers (while Nas just chills out with his job but uses some of his vacay time to stay home lol).

When Caleb and Morgyn had a few days off together, Nas used his vacay time and spent the days with them...and in those days, the three decided to get married. The three visited in three different places and collectively proposed; Nas asked Morgyn in Sulani; Nas asked Caleb on Sixam when Morgyn had finally built the wormhole generator; and Caleb asked Morgyn in the realm ♥

After having 3 beautiful weddings with their close friends and family as the guests, they are honeymooning in Selvadorada—and that’s where I’m at in my game now c:

I have a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot of pictures from this save oml. Most of them are taken with some flare and reshade, some are just screenshots of dumbassery, some are posed with ship aesthetics, some are [ahem] taken with ww lol. But overall, I have spent a solid in-game year in this save 👀👀👀 and i’m nowhere near finished with it hehe. Caleb, Morgyn and Nas have had quite an adventure of bs that I’ve mentioned and PLENTY more that i didn’t wanna ramble on about, but they’ve got a whole life of marriage and more for them :] and I’m excited.

I’m sorry that I keep forgetting to like, actually post shit lol, and I’m sorry this is a halfass attempt to catch everyone up. Only my friends know what’s all been happening through screenshot spam and streaming lol. But it’s been fun. 

I’m gonna go play some more, but I wanted to finally sit and share what’s been up with my game since putting Bloodborn on a hiatus lol. I’ll probably post more once the boys are out of their honeymoon phase uwu ~ 

[burningthemidnightcityoil]

ASPECTS AS GAME MECHANICS AND TRAITS

Here’s a fun idea to think about.

The Aspects of Homestuck are both very simple, and very complicated. They can have literal symbolic objects (Pumpkin for Void; IE “What Pumpkin?”), or they can be metaphorically symbollic (Light deals in a lot of metaphorical symbols and meanings), and they are very certainly Narrative Elements (Such as Breath being PLOT, or ACT; and Blood being Character, or YOU).

But I’mma gonna add an additional layer to the subject: The Aspect can also be elements to a Video Game.

Because SBURB is a Video Game, albeit an all encompassing one that plays on a idea that if you can create a universe in a video game, then your universe is also a video game.

BREATH - ACT YOU: ACT

If you haven’t realized, the ACT in Homestuck is Breath based. That’s right, Homestuck has played you. You’re the game now, and it is the Player.

Breath is many things, and they’re all the spur to action or to force, or even to explore. Its very freeform.

LIFE - Health “... Or your Life.”

The Health Bar, Your Lives; and All those lovely and freshly cooked dinners and lunches you keep finding on the dungeon floor.

Homestuck pushes this a step further, and now Life is also your Experience bar, though not necessarily the Level Up. After all, Life is about Growth.

LIGHT - The Guide and your Money pouch “Your Money...”

Light encompasses any Guide. From your Journal, taking on your quests; to your Notes, signalling out any significant information (Be it your actual notes, or something in game, ala Morrowind), to online guides.

Light, for Homestuck’s sake, is apparently your money. Your valuables, anything particularly shiny and expensive that’ll get you that all mighty sword the bastard of a merchant is keeping.

TIME - SAVE GAME? “This will be a timed mission.”

Saved Games, Resets, Reloads, New Games, Timed Games, Timed Missions.

Time is one of those definitive Aspects, and thus, is one of those Aspects that will appear in every video game, even if the Health Bar doesn’t.

But to brass tacks.

Homestuck explores how a saved games and reloads could work, because ultimately you really can’t explore those in a world that doesn’t revolve around one character. I imagine if we only had one character to explore in Homestuck, who was a Time player, then Saved Games would work as expected (Provided that Player is the Only Important Player) [Huh, that brings up an idea that more Players added, the more complicated things get; that could bring up a reason why a Lord of Time really does play Time as its expected to be]

HEART - Aesthetic; Character “ROMANCE OPTION”

While there is the unexplored idea behind how Hearts are also a measure of One’s Life... I’m not gonna go into that right now.

Heart has always been about Character as it (Your character) or they (The characters you meet) are expressed. The kinds of characters that rely on a certain aesthetics and weapons, even when impractical (See Cloud Strife, ) or when “clothes make the man” (see Nick Valentine, Fallout 4), or when the aesthetic identifies the character (Bloodborne).

Additionally, lot of games also add buffs to clothes, armor and weaponry, especially if they’re fanciful.

The secondary here is that there is a different between Character and Player. You want the complexities of Player Characters, you look at Blood. Story Characters? That’s all Heart.

Ask any shipper.

RAGE - Combat and the Fatigue Bar “Y’know? RAGE QUIT!”

Rage is an... interesting bag.

It could manifest as your Berserk button (Literally); its often the Fatigue bar, because gods forbid you can’t just run on a map with no fast travel.

Plus there’s the fact that Rage is a very violent aspect. Very warlike, like every combat system ever. If all other aspects color the powers of your combat system, Rage is the System. Because sometimes that system is bullshit.

BLOOD - Its you! “YOU BOY, stop this scurrying around!”

Blood is, again, a definitive aspect. After all, YOU are playing, ain’t ya? In a game world, especially one vested in choice and exploration, the world is decided based on YOU. Your relationships with the Characters, the Setting, the World...

The game world begins and ends with YOU.

DOOM - Game Over “GAME OVER MAN, THEY’RE COMIN’ OUT OF THE WALLS--”

Doom is pretty self explanatory. Its the Game Over, its the “Pokemon is Poisoned”, its the “Your World is Doom, you must go back a save”.

It can also make a surprising appearance in the form of Sanity bars, Hunger meters, because those are a hanging Doom above you if you can’t keep them up.

Majority of Games will have Game Overs, or Doomed States, or Bad Ends. You want a narrative with choice? Then you accept the possibility of fucking up royally. You want a straight forward narrative but with combat? Accept that you’re probably gonna die, and die alot. You decide to go into the Game Registry and delete something? DOOM.

This can also encompass your deadzones; Areas in video games were you touch em, you die, or you fall and you die (Half Life loved these).

Not necessarily affiliated with the actual game DOOM, but I’d dare you to try.

VOID - Anything, and Nothing at all The Rest...

Void is peculiar in Homestuck, in that it encompasses everything. It isn’t just absolute nothingness, those its that too, its also things that are meaningless, or people who aren’t relevant to the story.

That isn’t a bad thing. Any game with significant world building needs those fillers in order to make the world feel real.

On the flipside.

Anyone who’s played a Bethesda game will have fallen into this at least once (and the one in Oblivion is filled with fucking WATER)

SPACE - The World ... And Everything else.

A game can’t exist without some sort of World. Even if its just a box that collects falling boxes of various shapes. Even if its just a jumping square on a flat plane, its a plane and a world.

Plus, all that world Building.

Additionally, its Fast Travel.

MIND - Management Intelligence is just a dump stat.

There are plenty of games that have you manage resources, manage experience, levels, weapons and armor. Why go for that pleasing dress up when that hunk of full plate armor will stop arrows better?

Plus, Mind is the QUESTION. Its not your Answer, its not your Choices; The Game will provide you your choices, but you gotta have to ask first in order to get those choices.

So y’know.

Mind the pudding.

HOPE - Power UP; The Mana Bar Its your final fantasy.

Hope is an explosion waiting to happen. Its your Limit Break, your Power UPs, that magic mushroom coming out of the metal Brick, that Materia that can summon Gods...

It is also your Mana Bar. Because its fuckin Magic, and Magic in any setting, medium, or story is gonna be about how that world Believes Magic works. So long as you can fireball everything in sight, you’re good.

Its also additionally, the Story. Not the Plot (Breath), not your Fate (Doom) or Destiny (Time), but the Story as its expected to be a story.

... So its that one old bastard in the introduction that won’t shut up about the world ending or something, and not let you get to the game.

[vicar-dei]

My Love-Hate Relationship with Bloodborne

I’ve made it a habit to always play a game from the company From Software, especially after being drawn in by the first Dark Souls game. So when Bloodborne came out for the PS4 as an exclusive, not only did I buy the game day 1, I even played around in the Bloodborne open beta. The beta itself was nice, I really enjoyed the combat and the new trick weapon system. In addition, the lack of shields forced me to think a bit differently about how I played. I was the type to play lighter, dodge-based characters already, but not having a shield to fall back on when I messed up a dodge really helped me refine my skills (or so I thought).

The official game drops, and I buy it. I go through the starting areas, breezing through it all with relative ease. The beta had trained me for this, I thought, I can do this! Then I hit my first pitfall, the Forbidden Woods. Now the area itself was fairly easy, if not a bit of a slog. No, the real trouble I had was with the Shadow of Yharnam, a set of three hooded figures each with their own unique moveset. On top of dealing with all three of these enemies at once, I also was severely under-leveled for the task. So I ran away, quickly clearing out Hemwick Charnel Lane. Somewhere along the way, I fumbled into Iosefka’s Clinic and acquired the Cainhurst Summons. This item is required to get access to Castle Cainhurst, probably one of the most beautiful locations in Bloodborne, in my opinion. Unfortunately, this locations’ beauty blinded me and left me defenseless for the ass-kicking I would soon receive. 

Giant, bulging moquitos with woman’s faces. Large dining rooms and libraries filled with tanky ghosts. Deranged servants who pretended to be regular servants. Weird gargoyles with tons of i-frames (in Bloodborne this happens for alot of enemies, but it still doesn’t make it any less painful). Cainhurst tested me at literally every new turn I made, and I can safely say that my death toll in Cainhurst alone riveled my death toll for my entire playthrough up to that point. What awaited me at the end of my struggle? What’s my reward for me endlessly throwing my poor, innocent (no, his hundreds of beast kills don’t count, he was so pure) hunter to his death? Master Logarius, in all of his unsightly glory. Now I won’t lie, this boss broke me. He broke every single good feeling I had for Bloodborne, and all he left behind was pure, blind rage. Rage at the game, rage at the developers, rage at my own hunter. After my final encounter with Logarius, I quit out of the game, uninstalled it, and didn’t touch Bloodborne again for years.

Fast forward to 2020. I’m older now, a bit more experienced in Souls games. On top of playing Dark Souls 3 backwards and forwards, I’d also played games such as Code Vein and Mortal Shell, two more “souls-likes” that I thoroughly enjoyed the hell out of. On top of this, I went back into the first Dark Souls with Dark Souls Remastered, reviving my old DEX/ INT rapier, crystal magic spamming character to dominate the PvP scene (spoiler alert: the meta had evolved, so I ate pavement). Anyways, as I was looking up cool build videos to try out, I came across a few guides for Bloodborne as well. The more I kept reading, the more confused I got. Chalice dungeons give you the best blood gems? Grinding chalice dungeons for levels? Chalice Glyphs to help with farming? Since I had come directly from Dark Souls to Bloodborne, I didn’t even remotely look into doing chalice dungeons. I had assumed it was all side content, or maybe the more co-op sections of the game. As mad as I still was at Bloodborne, I had wanted to see if things would change if I just grinded out chalice dungeons.

So I bottled up my contempt, and I re-downloaded Bloodborne. I didn’t have PS Plus during my first playthrough, so I ended up making a new character, but I didn’t mind much. Cleric Beast, Father Gascoigne, Blood-Starved Beast, chalice dungeons! I started out simple, selecting chalice glyphs for high damage gem farming and enemies that drop lots of blood echoes. After about 3 hours, I had went from level 30 to level 100, with cursed gems on all my weapons (really good stat buff, usually comes with a really big downside). Needless to say, the game was a cakewalk after that point. Shadows of Yharnam, Rom the spider, even Master Logarius were a complete snooze. Before I knew it, I was close to the final boss, and was ready to delve into the Old Hunters DLC (that experience is a story for another time).

After this emotional roller-coaster, what do I think of Bloodborne? While the game made me question my life choices originally, after “properly” playing through the game I actually got to properly compare it to the other games From Software had produced, something I had never even considered doing due to my initial rage-quit. I can honestly say that I put Bloodborne up in quality in line with Dark Souls 3, if not maybe even higher. The atmosphere, the lore of the world, the bosses, and so much more. In addition, completing this game made me compare it to a lot of the other games I’ve tried out in the souls-like genre, which makes me value it as an art piece even more. It’s one of those games that I’ll definitely keep playing, and talking about, in the future.

[yeenybeanies]

A Bad Dream

i’ve loved bloodborne for years now, & just recently actually started playing it ( never mind that it’s kicking my ass ). hence some inspo to write a lil bit with it :> 

a hunter ( bloodborne ) & borrower reader ( 2nd person pov ) 

1492 words

mild language warning

feel free to leave comments in the tags!! thank you!!

There’s a chill in the air. Normally that wouldn’t be unusual, but you can tell––something in the setting sun and the rising moon that you can’t quite place, but you can feel it in your guts and bones and under your skin––that this night is different. It is something sinister. Evil? Perhaps. You aren’t sure. 

The moon looks far bigger tonight than it ever had––at least, you think it does. Has the moon always been so big? So bright? The streets of Yharnam, too, go quiet early on. Maybe the Yharnamites sense it too, whatever it was, and have taken to holing up in their homes for the night. You think you should do the same; tonight does not seem like a night for a borrower to be out. 

Those thoughts resonate stronger as you make your way through the streets, hugging the walls and curbs and whatever shelter you can find. Activity starts to pick up again; though still empty of people, monstrosities––gross, grotesque, twisted figures––now roam about, dragging their dirty rifles and pitchforks and cleavers behind them. Normal Yharnamites are to be avoided as is, but these? You want nothing to do with these. You don’t even know what these are––if they even are Yharnamites. You’ve never seen such disfigured, beastly–––

The Hunt. 

The Hunt. 

Tonight is the night of the hunt. Tonight! Of all nights! Oh, tonight you’ve wandered far from your home, and tonight is the night of the hunt! Realization runs through you, and you feel like your veins have suddenly been filled with ice. You shiver, too, your body afflicted with a chill both metaphorical and literal. 

No, no, no. You need to get home now. It is not safe to be outside in the Hunt. 

Fear keeps you shaking, but alert. You make your way through the streets as best you can, sprinting between bits of cover whenever you see an opportunity to do so. It’s utterly terrifying, seeing all the beasts, so big and horrible, wandering about. Mangey dogs, semi-grounded crows, brick and statue-wielding trolls, massive fucking pigs––oh! So many beasts. And so many of them still would make a quick snack out of a little borrower like you if given half the chance, you imagine. A part of you considers sneaking into one of the homes, if only for the night, to take refuge from the Hunt. 

Somewhere behind you, you hear shouting and commotion. It sounds like fighting. Oh no, that is not something you want any part of. You hold your bag closer to yourself and prepare to run, but the noise quickly grows nearer and stills you. No, whoever’s fighting is too close, and the next hiding spot is too far. You have to wait for things to quiet down before you’re willing to risk moving. 

That is, until you hear a low, throaty growl. You whirl around, damn-near jumping out of your skin. The snarl of a grizzly, worse-for-wear dog meets you, its lips pulled back to show its mouthful of twisted teeth. Horror overwhelms you; you act before you can think and run, your legs carrying you as quickly as they can out into the street. The dog’s snarls and barks and thundering paws ring in your ears. There is no way you are going to outrun this thing! Oh, it’s going to snap you up in its horrible mouth and tear you apart and swallow you down while you’re still alive and–––! 

And you trip. 

You fall forward, and quickly flip yourself over to face the beast, arms held up in vain to shield your face. Eyes squeezed shut, you brace yourself for your final, painful moments. You hear the dog growl, and then–––

And then you hear the dog shriek, and fall bodily to the brick road. You peek out between your shaking arms, eyes wide, and see the beast on the ground, dead, with a massive saw . . . thing sticking out of its head. You blink, stunned, watching the filthy blood gush from the wound, but you don’t get long to process what’s just happened. A masked man stands over the dog, boot pressed into its back, and yanks the weapon from its corpse. Red flies from the blade, some of it splattering onto you. You must have squeaked or flinched too hard; the man’s head snaps towards you. He sees you. Your whole body shakes. He just . . . stares. 

You don’t know how long you two sit there staring at each other. The massive man’s dark garments are soaked and slicked with blood. His weapon is in a similar condition, dripping all over the soiled street. There’s something strange about him. You can’t see much of his face, but he doesn’t appear to be disfigured like the other beasts of the night. 

Maybe he isn’t a beast at all. 

“ Y-you . . . are you . . . a Hunter? ”  Your voice squeaks and shakes. You don’t think he’s heard you, but he nods his head after a moment more of staring. 

From behind him, there’s more commotion. You flinch. He looks over his shoulder, and then back at you. He doesn’t seem to be much for words, but he holds up his free hand, gesturing for you to wait. His weapon shifts with a loud snap, he pulls a firearm from his back, and then he runs off towards the noise. 

Whether you intend to or not, you do stay. Time doesn’t register; your mind goes into a haze, and the Hunter is back before you know it. His garments drip with fresh blood, very menacing. You’ve barely moved since meeting him, but you do shake yourself out of it when he crouches down before you. Scared and feeling very vulnerable, you try to scramble backwards, away from him.

“ Mr. Hunter, I––no, please––! ”  He holsters both his firearm and his blade, and reaches for you with one gloved hand. Your plea stills him for a moment, but doesn’t deter him fully; those fingers wrap around your middle and lift you from the ground. You squirm and try to pull yourself free, your tiny hands pushing at his thumb, but it’s all to no avail.  “ Please! I only want to get home! It-it isn’t safe out here! ”  

To your surprise, the Hunter’s grip loosens until he holds you cupped in both of his hands. You look to the wall of fingers behind you, then back up to the hunter’s masked face. There is no malice in his eyes that you can see. It looks more like concern, compassion, to you. He stands, effort clearly made to keep from jostling you, though it has limited success. You whimper and brace yourself against his palm, head ducked. 

“ I will keep you safe. ”  Hearing his voice makes you look up to him again, eyes wide. It’s gentle, whispered, more on the deeper side from what you can tell. Your first instinct is to say no, to reject his help and carry on through the beast-filled streets on your own, but it takes only a moment to rationalize how truly stupid of an idea that is. This man––this man here who holds your body and life in his hands––is a Hunter. He is the one thing right now that stands between you and the night’s monstrosities, and he is a Hunter of beasts. 

You curl up, bringing your knees to your chest, and bury your head into your arms. Okay. He is your best chance at survival. You . . . have to go with him. Face still hidden, you nod in slow agreement. He . . . whether he sought it or not, has your permission to guard you. 

His hands shift so you sit in his left, leaving his right free to pull the collar of his scarf. Of course: he’ll need both hands to continue his hunt. You still shiver, but you crawl to his fingertips as he brings you near to the opening and climb in. It isn’t the most comfortable or ideal of spots, but you settle yourself into the tough fabric, making a sort of hammock. At least it’s warm. The Hunter’s breathing and heart beat are loud, but the rhythm of it all is sort of soothing. He can’t see you well here, so you pat at his neck, telling him that you’re . . . well, you’re about as secure as you’re going to get. The Hunter nods in return, and pulls out his weapons, readying himself once more for the journey ahead. As soon as he starts to run, you lurch and scrabble for better purchase, realizing that this night is going to be long, bumpy, and likely blood-soaked. 

Oh Great Ones be with you, and may you survive to see tomorrow . . .. 

[ranger-report]

Thoughts On: Mortal Shell  Open Beta

I want to start this off by stating up front that I am not a fan of Dark Souls in any way, shape, or form. Don't get me wrong, I don't think Dark Souls is bad per se. I actually really like the world the games have built up. I watch videos on the lore, the environments, the bosses, and I find it all thoroughly fascinating, it's just that when I play video games I like to enjoy playing them, and playing Dark Souls is like bashing my head against a wall repeatedly because I'm using my forehead in lieu of a hammer and these goddamn nails just won't go in the wall. Oh, I've tried to get into it; I've put in two separate six-hour runs, along with diving into Bloodborne because I'd heard that game rewards players who are more aggressive vs the measured style of Souls, but no matter what, I just don't have the patience to be punished over and over again by a game that actively hates me. So imagine my surprise when I not only got into Mortal Shell, but actually persisted to play through the entire demo.

Mortal Shell, developed by Cold Symmetry, is a Souls clone and proud of it. Currently, the open beta is available to download via the Epic Game Store. Pre-purchase is up and running for $29.99. The first trailer was released on April 1st of this year, but make no mistake, the game is no joke. Far from it. For those coming in late to the party, Dark Souls's gameplay revolves around slow, methodical combat in which the player has to read enemy patterns in order to know when to strike, parry, dodge, etc. Any enemy in the game can potentially be a bad time, meaning that if the player gets a little too cocky and impatient, a solid run can so south pretty fucking quickly if they're not paying attention to timing. That's literally what the game is: a massive, calculated game of timing, fueled by trial and error. If you die – and you will, frequently – you're sent back to the last checkpoint you camped at or visited or lit up. You'll have one chance to forge your way back to the point where you died, and reclaim all the currency you worked so hard to accumulate, but if you die again before you do, all of it is lost. So essentially we're working with a complex risk and reward system, in which any fight could be your last, any moment could turn ugly, and your character is having the worst fucking day they could imagine.

Mortal Shell takes this formula and puts a bit of a spin on it. Sure, you've got the health bar, the stamina bar – which depletes any time you attack, dodge, or run – the quick items, and the ability to parry and commit heavy attacks if your timing is right. But what it does differently is the character system itself. Most Souls games involve the player creating a character and slowly leveling up as time goes by. You could become a super beast depending on what you choose to invest in. Shell puts you in charge of a Foundling, basically a nameless/faceless lost spirit, who can inhabit the bodies of fallen warriors it comes across. Each warrior – called a Shell – has different attributes which can be leveled up. Some Shells are faster, some are tougher, and each one has their pros and cons to fit your play style. In the beta, we get two, named Harros and Tiel. Harros is a well-rounded fighter, your basic bitch knight class, while Tiel is more of a rogue, which a much higher stamina bar but can be hurt a lot quicker. Regardless of which Shell you choose to inhabit, you're carrying around what has to be one of the most badass swords I've seen in a video game in quite some time. Called the Hallowed Sword, it's two handed and looks like it could ruin pretty much anything if you put your mind to it. It has a secondary attack where it turns into a goddamn spear for massive damage. There's another weapon in the beta, a hammer and chisel, but I somehow missed that in my playthrough. I'm eager to dive back in and find it, but for now we'll focus on the sword. Sweet Jesus, that sword. If a fantasy game had the equivalent of a double-barreled shotgun, it would be the Hallowed Sword.

There's also a catch to hitching a ride in the Shells: if you take too much damage, the Foundling will be knocked out of the Shell, vulnerable and weak. You'll have an opportunity to get back into the Shell, and if you do, it's an instant HP refill and you're back in the fight. Your Shell can die twice, but if you're knocked out of the Shell a second time, it's game over and back to the checkpoint. This is inventive because dying isn't immediately a punishment, and it's also neat because the Foundling can still carry the Hallowed Sword while trying to get back to the Shell. I have a feeling YouTube is going to be full of No Shell Runs in which players go hard as only the Foundling, chopping, parrying, dodging, somehow escaping damage. And make no mistake, the naked Foundling will die in one hit without a Shell. Having a safety net like this automatically makes gameplay more forgiving and also more intense. Say you fuck up and get knocked out of your Shell early on, leaving you with just one more chance to get through to the next checkpoint knowing if you get knocked down again, you're done. That's a rush unlike many I've played in video games. Also the frantic panic of running and dodging as the Foundling, surrounded by enemies, trying to get back to your Shell, desperate to stay alive, is shockingly effective.

However, there's another weapon in the Foundling's arsenal: the ability to Harden. Pressing the left trigger instantly turns the Foundling into a rock solid statue, unable to move, but also unable to take damage for one single hit. Once the hit lands, the Harden goes away and the Foundling starts moving again. What is absolutely wild about this are the potential combat tactics that can arise. Because if the Foundling is moving or attacking when the Harden goes into effect, they will immediately resume what they were doing when the Harden is gone. So say you're going in for a light strike, followed up by a heavy strike, and before you can land the heavy strike the enemy goes into attack animation. You hit the Harden, freezing mid-swing, and the enemy connects – and then your heavy strike animation resumes, smashing into the enemy, staggering them, freeing you up to either dodge away or get in another attack. Some enemies will be staggered just from hitting your Hardened form, so even if you're not mid-swing, you'll have a window of opportunity to get in and sucker punch. But Harden has a cooldown period, so if you use it at the wrong time, you'll have a wait a minute before you can use it again. And come out of it at the wrong time, you could be facing the business end of a bad day.

What initially drew me to Mortal Shell was definitely not the concept of a Souls game, but rather that Cold Symmetry cited old-school first person shooter Quake as one of their influences on the game. By and large this comes across in the aesthetics: browns, grays, armor textures, otherworldly pagan imagery, skulls and bones and dark caverns, it's all over the place, and it's lovely. Grimy industrial atmosphere permeates everything. Enemies range from brutish bandits with swords and pikes, to imp-like creatures that poison you when they strike. And the monster design is a visual chef's kiss, craggy and awful and menacing. My personal favorite is the Pincushion Warrior, which I've dubbed because it looks like a goddamn pincushion. Walking around with an eyeless helmet and multiple fucking swords sticking out of its torso like, well, a meaty pincushion, when it notices you from afar it will pull out one of the swords and throw it you. It'll keep doing so until you get into melee range, at which point it pulls out two swords, one for each hand, and come at you fast and hard. Do enough damage to it and it will attempt a kamikaze maneuver, in which it rips off its fucking head to throw at you and release a poison cloud which does massive damage over time. Seriously one of the most metal things I've seen, and I cursed the fuck out loud when I saw it the first time. But the showstopper, the truly most outstanding beast in the beta, is the Enslaved Grisha, a lumbering monstrosity that looks like a combination between Silent Hill's Pyramid Head and BioShock's Big Daddy. You fight it in an icy cave, and its attacks are so thunderous it will shake loose stalactites from the ceiling which can fall on top of you for damage. It's fast, brutal, mean, and intimidating, and beating it was such a terrific rush that it made me wonder why I've never gotten into this style of game before when it feels this rewarding to win against a tough enemy. Maybe it's because Soulsborne games are vicious and unrelenting in their assault on the player as they slowly attempt to crawl their way through the environment. Here, it seems like there's just enough stacked in the player's graces to save them that it's simultaneously more forgiving and more brutal. With the Harden ability and the different Shells as combat style options, the choices presented to the player are unique enough to offer a deep challenge, but one that players themselves can modify depending on how they want to play.

There's a couple other mechanics that I want to touch on briefly while I'm here: Resolve, and Familiarity. Resolve is essentially a limit break with multiple uses. When you're attacking enemies, you're building Resolve, and can keep track of how much you're gaining via the meter above your health. But while it builds through attacks, it slowly goes away unless you fill a whole bar, and each Shell will have a different number of bars to fill. For example, Harros has four bars, Tiel has only two. Once a bar is filled, you'll be able to use the Resolve in one of two ways. The first is parrying; you can attempt to parry if you don't have resolve, but in my experience it worked better when I had a bar built up. If you've got the Resolve when you parry, you'll do so with greater success, but it'll also open up a window for you to hit the attack button immediately after. Time it right, and you'll do a powerful strike which will regain a large portion of health, which is handy as fuck when you don't have healing items, but also uses up a lot of Resolve. This can hinder you a little bit if you want to use your special strike. Remember how I said the Hallowed Sword has a super strike where it turns into a spear and does a fuckload of damage? Yeah, you need to fill up at least one or two Resolve bars in order to use it. I'm not sure if you need one bar, two bars, or a full load, haven't done as much experimenting with that as I'd like. Some things in the game are still obtuse, relying on trial and error to discover, which brings us around to Familiarity: picking up items in the game world at first gives only a brief guess at what the items will actually do, so you have to use them to figure out what their effect is. This can be positive, or negative, but the more you use said items the more familiar the Foundling becomes with the effect. Each item has a different number of times you need to use it to become completely familiar with it, but once you do, it'll unlock bonus side effects. For example, the weltcap mushrooms restore 40 hit points over the course of 60 seconds (the regen shrooms I mentioned earlier). But use them often enough, and the Foundling will get a bonus effect of being able to dodge once without using any stamina to do so. Meanwhile, using the tarspore mushrooms – which infect poison damage – will eventually make the Foundling immune to poison damage for 120 seconds. For me this is one of the more revolutionary parts of the game, which requires the most amount of trial and error and experimentation. Of course you're not going to want to use the poison mushroom again after it killed you with poison, but if you take it enough, next thing you know you're immune to poison for two minutes? This is wild when confronted with Imps that deal poison damage with each strike they land, or the fucking Pincushion Warriors and their suicide poison bomb. But at the same time, this could be a bit frustrating when the player gets rare items that are hard to come by, which may have huge bonuses, or massively negative effects. I love it, but also kind of hate it, though where Harden and Resolve add complementary aspects to the combat, Familiarity throws in the gamble of figuring out whether a consumable will do you harm, or make your day.

Mortal Shell has already impressed the hell out of me simply by being a Soulsborne game that I can play and not feel vandalized by, but also through sheer innovation and attention to detail. The atmosphere is thick and luscious, the combat is deep and so are the RPG elements, and there's a genuinely terrifying obtuse story being played out. I did have a few issues with my playthrough, notably the two times the game crashed, one of which forced me to force restart my desktop. A few other ragdoll glitches notwithstanding, the beta is a resoundingly solid experience which is promising great things for the full game. Something which, to my unending surprise, I have already pre-purchased based on this demo. May wonders never cease.

[divineveil-inactive]

Never ending survey

RULES: Repost, do not reblog. Tag 10 blogs!

Tagged by: @lareine-kira and @paleshadeofrose

Tagging: @hangedemperor , @istolin , @maximiloix , @trahja-tia , @eorzeasfrozenknight , @charm-in-spades , @thorcatte , @haila-wetyios , @a-sharlayan-abroad

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BASICS.

FULL NAME: Varg Blacksoul, formerly Timur Oronir NICKNAME: Varg-Varg (given by Lareine), Stiffy and Grumpy (given by Silke) AGE:  54 BIRTHDAY:  9th sun of the 1st astral moon ETHNIC GROUP: Xaela Au Ra NATIONALITY: Othard, Ishgard LANGUAGE/S: Common, xaelic, ishgardian SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Demisexual ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Biromantic RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single and not looking for company. HOME TOWN / AREA:  Dawn Throne, Azim Steppe CURRENT HOME:  Pillars, Ishgard PROFESSION: Paladin, medic/healer at Ishgard’s service.

PHYSICAL.

HAIR: Long and silvery grey. EYES: Black with white limbal rings, small irises. FACE: Angular features, long nose, high cheekbones. LIPS: Narrow, often cracked, slightly darker than his usual skin color. COMPLEXION: Grayish purple BLEMISHES: Dark circles SCARS: Lots of scars which he keeps hidden at all times. Two thick, long ones are visible and almost go across his right eye. TATTOOS: No tattoos. HEIGHT:  210cm WEIGHT: Slightly underweight BUILD: Slender but masculine, somewhat toned. FEATURES: Black markings around eyes, and naturally thick, black claws. ALLERGIES: None USUAL HAIR STYLE: At work or formal meetings it’s combed back either completely or with some locks on his temples left loose. In more casual situations he mostly just lets it be. USUAL FACE LOOK: Calm, focused, narrowed eyes. USUAL CLOTHING:  Full, dignified heavy armor or parts of it combined with a long coat, formal robes, jodhpurs, vests, blouses and high-heeled boots.

PSYCHOLOGY.

FEAR/S: Imprisonment, being held or tied down, physical pain, betrayal. ASPIRATION/S: To be successful, self-sufficient and powerful until the end, to bring as many as possible wrongdoers to justice, to find an heir, and catch people still on the loose who managed to escape his revenge long ago.

POSITIVE TRAITS: He keeps his word, doesn’t leave things unfinished, is a good motivator for slackers, aims for high-quality results in everything, is reasonable and logical.

NEGATIVE TRAITS: Insensible towards most of people, logic always comes before his own or other people’s feelings, very straightforward, capable of cruelty if necessary.

TEMPERAMENT: Calm SOUL TYPE/S: Thinker ANIMALS: Gray wolf

VICE HABIT/S: Smoking. He hates it, but it’s the least harmful thing that calms his nerves down, and he’s addicted. He tries to limit it though, and use it only in worst occasions, since he doesn’t want the side effects affecting his health or work. If things get especially grim, he also has full stashes of potent liquor and intravenous sedatives.

FAITH: Science usually comes first, but he’s also spiritual in some way. It’s one of those topics he doesn’t discuss with anyone. Some of his duties include working as a cleric, so it may have something to do with Halone. Or then it doesn’t, and it’s just another job.

GHOSTS?: Has seen them with his own eyes so can’t deny their existence. AFTERLIFE?: He hopes it exists, for reasons. REINCARNATION?: It’s a possibility.

POLITICAL ALIGNMENT: Generally neutral, but on demand would choose the side of underdogs: ignoble, the poor and the sick, minors etc. Wouldn’t show his alignment publicly if it was a threat to himself. Would also pretend to be supporting the oppressor, only trying to sabotage their work at every opportunity. Even I’m not sure would he actually die for anyone else or some common cause. He has fled once to save his own hide and he could do it again. Knows main points of what’s going on and where around the world for the sake of common knowledge, but is only interested in topics that concern himself. Has been a target for racists since arriving to Ishgard as a teenager, so he despises them from the bottom of his heart.

EDUCATION LEVEL: Learned

FAMILY.

FATHER : Not relevant MOTHER :  Not relevant SIBLINGS : None that he knows of EXTENDED FAMILY: Iris Ymir (patient and protege) and Arsene Dreadeois (butler)

NAME MEANING/S:

Timur is a Turkic and Mongolic name which literally means iron. In Indonesian, timur translates to east and symbolizes hope by the rising sun.

All members of the Oronir tribe believe themselves to be direct descendants of Azim, the tribe's god of the sun.

Varg is wolf in swedish. Varg was also originally a nickname given by his friends at the Steppe. It was the only thing he kept after starting his new life in Ishgard and severing his ties with his homeland.

Blacksoul was given by his comrades in the army for being so ruthless towards enemies - both the ones on the battlefield and the ones captured.

HISTORICAL CONNECTION?: None

FAVORITES.

BOOK:  Science, mythology, swordplay, alchemy, etc. Everything that has something to do with his work or hobbies. DEITY: Halone seems to share most of his values. HOLIDAY: Doesn’t celebrate any. MONTH: September and October. There isn’t many little things in life he gets pleasure from, but fall colors is one of them. SEASON: Fall and winter. PLACE: His estate, cathedrals, libraries and forges. WEATHER: Thick fog, rain and sunshine at the same time. SOUND/S: Fire, rain and musical instruments when someone who actually knows what they’re doing plays them. SCENT/S: Herbs, iron, parchment. TASTE/S:  Whisky, tea, whatever Arsene makes. FEEL/S:  Clean clothes, heat radiating from a fireplace. ANIMAL/S:  Doesn’t like animals except for his chocobo, Mori. NUMBER: Doesn’t care about numbers. COLORS: White, black, blood red, gold, silver.

EXTRA.

TALENTS: Accuracy of a chirurgeon, skillful with swords, managing to define a goal fast in any kind of surprising situation and being very patient and stubborn at achieving it.  BAD AT: Admitting he has weaknesses, comforting people, having fun, small talk, relaxing. HOBBIES: Reading, studying, weapon maintenance, alchemy. TROPES: Antihero, tragic hero and mad scientist. Definitely could also be a villain. Depends on whom you ask.

QUOTES:

“Since you seem to be so worried of my… customers, perhaps I should take you along the next time I interrogate them. You would see with your own eyes what kind of delicate, exquisite and misunderstood individuals they are, when they spit on you, mock their victims and brag about the amount of people they have raped or murdered.”

“Today it happens. Make sure she is out of here before I return tonight. I am no longer even sure which one of them is the worse one.”

“It was a mere procedure. If procedures were considered intimate, I would be close friends with half of Ishgard by now.”

“Do tell me... If you work as much as you claim, how come you are always broke when we meet?”

“Very well. Play something for me. Let us see are you a man of your word.”

MUN QUESTIONS.

Q1 :  If you could write your character your way in their own movie, what would it be called, what style would it be filmed in, and what would it be about?          

A1 :  He’s been busy sticking his spoon into so many soups during his life that you could probably make a trilogy of his fooleries feats. The first part would tell about his early life in Azim Steppe and how he was forced to leave from there, the second part about how he found his soulmate and adapted to his new life in Ishgard, and how it all eventually ended up into a shitstorm, and the third one would be the current storyline. No clue about the name, though. The Soulforge would be perfect but too bad it’s taken.

Q2 :  What would their soundtrack/score sound like?          

A2 : Bloodborne, Dark Souls and Amnesia the Dark Descent OSTs are absolutely the closest ones you could get to Varg. Orchestral, choir, bowed string instruments, both epic and monstrous. Even if there were more peaceful pieces here and there, while listening to them you’d still have that same feeling of dread you used to have while playing the original Resident Evil and Silent Hill games and finding a safe room: you just barely escaped death but can’t stay in the safe haven forever.

Q3 : Why did you start writing this character?          

A3 : He’s quite different compared to my Forsaken shadow priestess in WoW, whom I used to RP for... two or three years? Long story short: I wanted something else for a change. I also used to have an old Forsaken death knight, who was a lot more similar to Varg, but he was more evil. He existed pretty much only for occasions when someone needed a true villain for some plot. He was funny however and I always thought it was a pity I didn’t get chances to RP him more often.

Q4 : What first attracted you to this character?          

A4 : He’s a mixture of four different OCs of mine, with a bit of his original spice ofc. One of them came into being in, uh, somewhat obscure conditions. Kept seeing him in my dreams when I was a kid, and he became one of my imaginary friends I used to have back then. And not just one of the many, but the closest one. Also generally in entertainment I couldn’t care less about Lukes and Frodos. Villains, tragic heroes and the like are my thing. They’re usually the most multilayered and interesting characters.

Q5 : Describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse.

A5 : Perfectionism. I’m similar and it sometimes drives me nuts to watch him neglecting himself while trying to achieve perfection. If I could physically talk to him I would go and slap him and be like “EAT. SLEEP. YES THE THING IS GOOD ENOUGH ALREADY. LEAVE IT.”

Q6 :  What do you have in common with your muse?          

A6 :  Well, already kind of answered this one, but wait, there’s more: insomnia, nightmares, PTSD, misanthropy and cynicism come to mind first. And booze. How could I almost forget booze? I believe I know what misery is so I’m good at RPing miserable characters and make them look as authentic as possible. *lols like Alcyone from Magic Knight Rayearth* We both also have a strong sense of justice and nonexistent sympathy for those who use others as stepping stones. Aye I know, sounds a lot like a self-insert character, but it’s not like that. It’s more like... before meeting him/the OCs he’s based on, I used to be quite a scentless and tasteless kid. Similarities and peer support attract. And I’ve also learned from him.

It’s also a lot like me and Lareine. We became friends because we had 95% of the same interests and problems but perhaps that’s why we get along so well and understand each other.

Q7 :  How does  your muse feel about  you?          

A7 :  He would probably hate and like me at the same time. Or couldn’t decide. We both like peace and quiet, doing our job well is fundamental and our basic values are pretty much the same. We would get along well if we worked in the same place. However, unlike him, I have some horrid procrastination seasons, crippling self-esteem issues, tend to put other people’s needs and opinions above my own and keep stressing about things for 7 billion souls instead of just myself. I’m suspicious of pretty much everything else except Lareine and our plushie crow Agatha, except that Agatha creeps me out sometimes as well when she takes out a knife and sits next to my bed at night, staring at me, can’t watch Hachiko without bawling my eyes out during the entire movie, love puppies and kittens and danger noodles and I’m addicted to video games. Very likely he’d kick me out as well.

Q8 :  What characters does your muse have interesting interactions with?        

A8 : Varg would never admit it to himself, but I think he gets best along with people who are a bit silly in some way, and who get on his nerves by being too carefree and doing stupid things. Lareine and Iris, when they’re behaving. Arsene, who’s kind at everyone. Currently Shaura is my favorite. Varg himself is so uptight people like them help breaking his gray routines. Also a bonus: he doesn’t see them as a threat, so that’s probably the closest he’s able to get to relaxing among other people.

Q9 :  What gives you inspiration to write your muse?        

A9 : I’m a fan of my own characters. It doesn’t feel like I would’ve created them. I saw them with my third eye or something and I’ve just written for others to read what I’ve seen. I don’t plan RPs beforehand. I just let the hound loose and let him do whatever he wants. So far I haven’t got tired of my characters’ antics and could just write more. The only obstacles are limited hours per day, necessary evils like eating and sleeping, procrastination, trying to sort out my life, and the damn FFXIV. SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE IT OUT OF MY HANDS.

Q10 : How long did this take you to complete?          

A10 : Ehh, maybe 4-5 hours.