#i just watch for lewis honestly i don’t support the rest i know it’s awful’ blah blah blah

[l8tof1]

In 2008 a newspaper reported that then - FIA president Max Mosley had a Nazi-themed BDSM orgy with 5 prostitutes, being himself the son of a well-known fascist. So. Yeah. Not our first rodeo tbh.

Oh and he did not lose his job over that, btw. He went to court and won. Then he stepped down at the end of 2009.

well then.

for the first time on here i’m at a loss of what to respond

[justanothercinemaniac]

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #233 - National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

Spoilers Below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: No.

Format: Blu-ray

1) There are five theatrical films in the Vacation franchise, this is the only one I’ve seen. I’ve never seen the need to see the other ones, honestly. This one’s already good enough.

2) The opening animation over which the credits is a strong start to the film. It establishes a classic Christmas vibe and silly/slapstick humor. There’s nothing particularly PG-13 about the animation, just PG. It’s not raunchy or rude, just funny. I think that’s an important thing because it’s what makes Christmas Vacation as good as it is. Not the occasional raunch (which is very limited, I think) but instead the silly family elements. Not to mention it sets up a great original song.

3) The opening carols scene in the car with the Griswold clan does well to establish that dynamic. Clark is a little TOO enthusiastic but it’s sincere, Ellen is supportive, and the kids are kind of over it all.

4) This first encounter with the truckers is very strong. It shows two of the films best comedic elements: Clark’s ability to take things too far and then the build of it. Each choice makes the situation worse and worse leading to an inevitable, unexpected, hysterical climax to the scene.

5) I love Ellen.

Ellen: “Clark, stop it! I don’t wanna spend the holidays DEAD!”

6) Honestly, there are a lot of great little dialogue exchanges in the movie. I dig it.

Ellen: “Clark.”

Clark: “Yes honey?”

Ellen: “Audrey’s frozen from the waist down.”

Clark: “That’s all part of the experience, honey.”

7) When you make a comedy, you HAVE to have a good sense of humor. That’s the entire point! This film succeeds there. It’s odd, ridiculous, slapstick, and silly. Born from escalating problems and crazy “solutions” as well as a nice element of absurdity humor. Clark’s sticky fingers, everything on Christmas Eve, the sled, it all lends itself to this idea.

8) Julia Louise Dreyfus is in this movie. That is all.

9) Of course Chevy Chase is great in this movie, he’s freaking Chevy Chase! But Beverly D’Angelo is equally as good.

While the straighter of the two actors, the one who sees more clearly, D’Angelo gets a number of clever and hysterical moments in the film. She has a great chemistry with Chevy Chase but helps to make her Ellen MORE than Mrs. Griswold. She’s her own character, full of life and personality, patience and flaws, just truly wonderful.

10) I always like that Clark has a Tasmanian Devil coffee mug. It speaks to his fun energy as a character.

11) I never really got why Clark lies to Mary about not being married. It gives Chase a funny outlet to play flustered, but there’s nothing in this film which suggests to me he’d cheat on Ellen.

12) The arrival of the extended Griswold clan is perfectly done. A clear sense of family conflict and insanity is conveyed not only by the performances but the quick editing and off kilter camera angles. It’s very well done.

13)

Clark: “Russ, when was the last time I overdid anything?”

14) Remember how I said Beverly D’Angelo is crazy funny?

Audrey: “Do you sleep with your brother? Do you know how sick and twisted that is?”

Ellen: “Well I’m sleeping with your father.”

15) Much of this film benefits from a pacing that allows us to check in with the whole family here and there, supporting its heart and characters.

16) I actually analyzed the scene where Chevy Chase falls off the roof for a Physics for Filmmakers class. The class was horrible but I had fun with the project. I’d share some of what I wrote but it’s long and boring. Basically the gist of it is the ice can’t travel to the gutter like that but also the velocity of the gutter changes between shots.

17) I don’t know why, but my family always quotes this line like crazy.

Margot: “And why is the carpet wet, TOD?”

Tod: “I don’t KNOW Margot!”

18) Clark’s failed lights attempt.

There are two things which stand out in this scene: Clark’s in-laws are freaking awful and his immediate family are great. The in laws just relentlessly mock Clark leading Audrey to stand up for her dad.

Audrey: “He worked really hard, Grandma.”

I love that. I love seeing Audrey getting to show some real love and support for her dad instead of being sidelined as a stereotypical teenage girl. It’s freaking great.

19) Clark in the attic.

Firstly, Clark’s mother in law is an idiot. “Oh, the ladder to the attic is open. It must’ve just fallen or something, there can’t be ANY way a person is up there. I shouldn’t check or anything.” Jerk.

But most importantly, the attic scene is the best representation of the film’s heart. Holiday movies need a good heart to it, good emotion, otherwise they’re just a lazy cash grab. This film’s heart, its focus on family and familial love, are one of the reasons it has held up as well as it has 28 years later. Clark’s sentiment over watching old home movies, supported by a great Ray Charles song, is one of the best parts of the film.

20)

Clark: “Honey, you honestly think I’d check thousands of tiny little lights if I wasn’t sure it was plugged in?”

21) The fact that the solution to the problem with the lights is so abundantly simple is great. Also relatable. How many of us have plugged something into the wrong plug and obsessed over what was wrong?

22) Cousin Eddie just showing up when he does helps give the film an extra bit of energy to propel it in its last hour. Honestly if we had stuck with what was going on with no change or development it might’ve gotten a little dull, but Eddie is just a perfect source of fun family conflict.

23) Some of Clark’s asides when Eddie shows up are just freaking hysterical.

Clark: “If I woke up tomorrow with my head seen to the carpet I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am right now.”

24) Randy Quaid as Cousin Eddie.

Eddie is this film’s ultimate scene stealer. Quaid, reprising his role from the first Vacation film, plays Eddie as totally sincere and honest. Yes he’s a dumbass, yes he causes problems, but there is not a hint of malice in his performance and that’s important. You need to like Eddie, despite his idiocy, you need to root for him along with the other characters. He’s a sweet guy, he just causes a lot of problems, and he fits perfectly with the rest of the cast.

25) Brian Doyle Murray as Mr. Shirley is a great Scrooge-like character in this film. You understand he’s pretty much a pill before you even learn what he did about Christmas bonuses.

26) The saucer sledding scene is crazy fun, but I never got how Cousin Eddie and the kids were able to see Clark go as far as he did. Like, we see him go through woods where no one else is, across a highway, and into a WalMart. And they’re just up on the hill reacting?

27) Clark’s pool fantasy.

The key part to this fantasy is not the presence of a pool, but how happy it makes his family. Clark doesn’t want to let anyone down. He wants to be a traditional patriarch and provide for his family. To not succeed 100% feels like a failing to him, that’s why the pool is so important to him.

28) The conversation Clark and Ruby Sue have together about Santa Claus continues to show off the film’s heart but mores how it balances heart and humor. There’s some crass language mixed in but it doesn’t undermine the emotion of the scene.

29) And now it’s Christmas Eve, and EVERYTHING on Christmas Eve is just one big problem after another. The night descends further and further into chaos before the movie is over which is truly freaking great!

30) Aunt Bethany and Uncle Lewis are a great late addition to the film. For animation fans, the actress who plays Aunt Bethany is also Betty Boop and Uncle Lewis is Dr. Finklestein from The Nightmare Before Christmas. They’re totally nuts, nonsensical, and just fun to watch.

31) All the cat-in-the-box movement is done by Chevy Chase.

32) That Turkey is SO dry!

All the crunching is so uncomfortably funny, leading into a hysterical extended dinner table scene which is a lot of fun.

33) Honestly these next batch of notes are going to be commenting on how each gag works so well. For example: the dad cat gag, for some reason, is extremely funny!

34) Ah, the Christmas bonus.

This scene is so freaking great. The entire film set it up, we’ve been waiting for this bonus. Meaning the surprise of it is as great for the audience as it is for Clark. The big setup, how much is riding on the bonus, means the fall is even greater. And Chevy Chase’s rant is one of the greatest movie rants EVER! I love it.

35) Clark’s following mania is great to watch, specifically the hilarity and insanity of the squirrel chase.

36) I’m just gonna leave this here.

Clark: “This is a full blown four alarm Holiday emergency here! We’re going to press on and we’re gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap danced with Danny FUCKING Kaye!”

37) The heart to heart between Clark and his dad is a nice reclaiming of the heart that Clark almost lost with his rant. And just when everything seems okay…

38) Eddie happens.

39) I love Ellen.

Ellen: “I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping.”

40) The police response seems a little excessive, but I guess when a wealthy white guy is kidnapped they bring out the freaking marines.

41) Where Ellen’s hand is in this scene (and where it returns to) was improvised by Beverly D’Angelo.

42) And despite the movie ending on a joke, the ending does have a nice sweetness to it. A sincerity about the madness of the holiday spirit and its equal success.

Christmas Vacation is a holiday treat that grows better with time. The humor is supported by a strong cast and equally strong heart. Chevy Chase is obviously great, but other cast members such as Beverly D’Angelo and Randy Quaid get their time to steal the show. Filled with endlessly iconic holiday movie moments, it’s a great treat for the holiday season.

[literati42]

Batfam Week day 6: Paparazzi

Title: Warning Signs

Rating: PG 13 (a smidge of language and some discussion of suicide)

Genre: Angst, family, emotional h/c, a bit of humor

Characters: Tim Drake-centric, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Damian Wayne, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth

Description: Batfam week day 6: Paparazzi. The reporter for a gossip column uncovers something a bit closer to the truth than anyone could guess, leading the Batfamily to realize they should be worried about one of their own.

Note: The week is winding down, but I am still taking requests. Hit me with them.

Note 2: Read the end notes for more information about suicidal behavior and resources.

            It started with a question. Tim should have known better, he realized, but the truth was he was so exhausted. Bruce gave a speech for the Gotham historic society, and Tim stood behind him on the stage. He applauded with everyone. Honestly, it was a great speech, good enough that Tim could focus on it even though a part of his brain was actively trying to make him fall asleep standing up. He felt a wave of gratitude when everything wrapped up, and the applause died until he saw reporters begin to ask questions. He groaned, “They're doing a Q and A.”

           “You could sneak out, I’m certain no one would miss you,” Damian said beside him. Tim looked down and frowned. He recognized it for the kindness it was, even wrapped in Damian’s usual surly packaging. Tim nodded and slipped back behind the curtain. He was certain he made a clean get away, and let out a breath. He started toward the coffee shop on the corner. Tension built in his shoulder, and he felt the hairs on the back of his neck raise.

           Someone was following him.

           Tim sped up slightly and slipped down an ally. He pressed his back against the brick wall and cautiously watched the passersby. There. He grabbed his pursuer by the arm and slammed the person back against the wall. It was a woman, with severe features and hair pulled into a ponytail. She raised a voice recorder. “Cynthia Lewis, Glimpses of Gotham.” Tim released her arm and stepped back, just a reporter. No, not even a reporter, a writer for that awful gossip rag.

           “I’m not taking interviews today,” Tim said, stepping out onto the street.

           “Your father sure does take self-defense training seriously huh?” she said, following. He heard her struggling to keep up with his quickened pace in her pumps. “What else does living with Bruce Wayne intel?”

           “No comment,” Tim replied, stopping at the crosswalk as cars whipped by. Cynthia caught up then, looking at him.

           “You seemed pretty angry back there. Do you get that angry often?”

           He looked over at her. That question was not the usual ‘who is your father dating’ dribble he was used to. Does he get angry? He shook his head and looked back at the traffic light.

           “Is that a no?”

           “It’s a no comment.” The white walk sign lit up, and he started walking. For a moment she was not there, and then she caught up. He looked down to see she was now carrying her heels to keep up with him.

           “You retreat from social gatherings a lot don’t you?”

           He fell silent. She would eventually get tired of talking, he assured himself. But that was the moment she asked the question that started everything. “Where did you get the scar on your wrist?” Tim’s steps faltered for a second.

           “No comment,” he finally said, he darted across the street, between cars, giving her no chance to follow.

_-_-_

           Tim woke up the next day and headed toward the kitchen. He paused on the stairs and turned around. Damian’s door shut quickly. Weird, he thought. He shrugged and went on down. The smell of pancakes filled him as he opened the kitchen door and he stopped in his tracks. Alfred was cooking, Jason was helping, and Dick was sitting on the counter.

           “What…is everyone doing here?” he paused when Bruce walked in. “Did a mission come up?”

           “Can’t your brothers just come home?” Jason asked, licking batter off the spoon. “You hungry? You love pancakes right?”

           “I do,” Tim said slowly, wondering if he woke up in the twilight zone. “I…just want coffee.”

           “Not hungry? But coffee huh? You’re hitting coffee awfully hard lately. Sleeping okay?” Dick asked. Tim grabbed a mug and started to pour it, but Dick took it and filled it for him. He handed it back, and Tim took a long gulp. He definitely was not caffeinated enough for whatever weirdness was happening.

           “My sleep is…normal,” he said, ignoring the fact that not sleeping was his normal. He sensed someone behind him and spun around, sloshing coffee. Damian stood there, hand on his hip.

           “You’re so scrawny, Drake. You’re going to need a new costume.”

           “What…the hell is happening?”

           “Why, did I make you angry?” Damian asked.

           “Do you get angry, often?” Dick added. “Like…easily?”

           “Or have mood swings?” Jason said.

           Tim sat down his mug. Bruce was watching, and even Alfred had stopped cooking.

           “Someone is going to start explaining to be what is happening before I am forced to test you for Joker toxins.” Tim watched his family exchanging looks.

           “So you probably don’t read Glimpses of Gotham,” Jason started.

           “You read that? Why doesn’t this surprise me more?” Tim asked. Dick picked a copy of it off the counter and offered it over. Tim found himself staring at his face, on the cover. His eyes widened. The tagline read: “Tim Drake Suicide Scare? Find out why the son of Billionaire Bruce Wayne is dying to get away.” Tim flipped frantically until he came to the story. His eyes scanned the pages in record pace.

           “All the warning signs are present…” he read out loud. The reporter referenced his quickness to get angry. His social withdraw—which the reporter indicated by him having no friends. The reporter referenced his recent loss of weight, how he was practically skin and bones. She mentioned the bags under his eyes as evidence of insomnia. As he read the signs she indicated that there was no evidence of having, he suddenly began to put together his family’s concern. The reporter could not know of his recklessness, the hopelessness, the anxiety…Tim shook his head. The biggest part of the story was clear. The scar on his risk as proof.

           Tim lifted it, “You know this is from a case right?”

           “Yeah,” Dick said, “But, consider the other things…Tim, we’re just worried about you.”

           “This is an intervention.”

           “Tim…”

           “No, this is an actual intervention. You have to be kidding. Haha, hilarious everyone,” Tim said.

           “Timber, we just want…”

           Tim held up his hand to stop whatever his brother was about to say, “This is ridiculous.”

           “You don’t sleep,” Dick said, “You aren’t eating well. You don’t have friends. Tim…we’re worried.”

           “Well when you describe it, Dick, my life sounds horrible. Thanks.”

           “Tim,” Bruce’s voice cut through their arguing. “This is something that needs to be addressed. We are not saying that this story is true, but if these problems exist, they need to be handled. If you are not at your best, and you continue to patrol you put yourself and this team at risk.”

           “Right, well I would hate to get in the way of a mission,” Tim snapped. He left the room, letting the kitchen door slam behind him.

           “Smooth,” Jason said, his voice loud in the suddenly silent room.

_-_-_

           Tim went back to his room and sunk onto the bed.

           “You wouldn’t use a gun, right?”

           Tim jumped, “Damian, get out.” The kid instead walked further in.

           “You wouldn’t though, not with how Father is about guns. You respect him too much.”

           “Damian…do you find this funny?” Tim looked at him, “Because it’s not funny.”

           “I am curious what substances I need to remove from your room,” Damian said. Tim paused and looked at him. Damian’s tone remained flat, but there was actual fear in his eyes.

           “It’s just a story, just some paparazzi garbage. Dami, it’s fiction.”

           “But you do all of those things, do you deny it?” His eyes flashed. “Can you swear to me that you would never, have never considered it. Swear it on our family’s honor.” For the second time, Damian’s words gave him pause. The kid said our family, including Tim with a single word.

           “Look…it’s not where my head is right now, Dami,” he said. He ran a hand through his hair, “Things get dark in my head sometimes. I’m not denying that. Things have been piling up, and I guess, I’ve let things like sleep and eating slip. But I need you to hear me. That is not where my head is right now. It isn’t.”

           Tim could see the words churning in his little brother’s mind. “So, we can agree I am vastly superior to you in many ways,” Damian said suddenly. Tim raised an eyebrow.

           “This took a turn.”

           “I’m a better fighter, I have significantly more skills,” Damian met his eyes, “So you should turn to me as back up. When you’re head gets dark.” Tim met his kid brother’s eyes, and he gave one nod, his voice failing him. Damian got up and ran out of the room, but the door did not shut before a hand caught it. Tim glanced up as Bruce walked in.

“We don’t need to talk about this.”     “We do,” Bruce said, he walked over. “You misunderstood me.”

“I’m certain that was my fault too,n right?”

Bruce sighed in frustration, “Tim.” He stopped and started over, “Tim, I don’t want you in the field compromised because I care what happens to you.” He crouched down to look into the teen’s eyes. “If you’re hurting, that’s something I need to know. Not Batman, me. Bruce. Your…your father.” Tim found rebellious tears escaping and he turned, trying to hide them. He felt Bruce take his shoulders, and draw him in, resting a hand on his head. “I have you. We’ll figure it out, Tim. We’ll figure all of this out.” Tim opened his eyes and through his tears, he saw Jason, Dick, and Alfred standing in his doorway.

           They would figure this out. Together.

PSA: For more information on suicidal behavior and warning signs click here

 Also to get support, read stories of real people, and find ways you can help check out To Write Love on Her Arms

 If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidality, get yourself or them help. There is no substitution for seeking mental health counseling. It works, it saves lives. There is no shame in that. Also please call the national hotline

Seek help, notice the signs, and support exists.

[maryseward666]

JAMES MALONE Thinks ARSIS Stands Out Because None Of Its Members 'Necessarily Like Extreme Metal'

RARE BLACK METAL COLLECTIBLES

Alex Haber of Heavy New York conducted an interview with guitarist/vocalist James Malone and bassist Noah Martin of melodic tech-death overlords ARSIS prior to their October 26 concert at The Kingsland in Brooklyn, New York. You can watch the entire chat below. A few excerpts follow (transcribed by BLABBERMOUTH.NET). On the creation of the latest studio album, "Visitant": James: "It was fun. It was a lot of fun to get together. We did an insane amount of pre-production. A lot of us ended up tracking a fair amount of the album at our respective home studios, so it was kind of relaxed. It wasn't a super-stressful experience necessarily. Mixing of it went very smooth, Mark Lewis knocked it out of the park as usual. It has really cool tones. It sounds pretty natural to me, especially in comparison to a lot of the metal records getting produced these days. I think we're all pretty stoked with it." Noah: "We took our time and we were able to like, Jim said, able to work at home, get really good performances. The mixing performance for Mark didn't take an awful lot of…I mean, it took a lot of work on his part, but it wasn't as difficult. He wasn't making a lot of edits, he was letting the tracks speak for themselves and he was able to do his magic a lot more effortlessly." On whether the band considers "Visitant" to be the logical follow-up to 2013's "Unwelcome" or stand on its own: James: "I definitely think it stands on its own. I don't know if that was necessarily…" Noah: "It was something that happened very naturally. It was a natural progression and a lot of those riffs and parts came together over the course of three, four years." James: "There was a bunch of riffs that I had started working on maybe seven years ago that Shawn [Priest, drums] and Noah just had the original files of. Shawn kind of started arranging them together. They weren't intended to be necessarily related at all and it really helped get a jumpstart on a quite a few songs that way. But as far as the gap being, I don't know, it wasn't necessarily planned. Honestly, it really didn't feel like that long of a gap to us. We were really supporting 'Unwelcome' up into 2016 with some tours. It was really a two-year little lull there where not too much was happening, but Brandon [Ellis, guitar] joined THE BLACK DAHLIA MURDER and I was working with NECROMANCING THE STONE and Shawn and Noah had their own projects going. Noah and I both made some major moves during that time. I moved to Dallas from Virginia. He moved to Seattle from Virginia. All of that stuff takes time and focus away from doing a new ARSIS. I felt it was a very natural time for us to get a new album together. I think it came out pretty rad. We're stoked on it." On whether they feel ARSIS can appeal to fans of various sub-genres of metal: Noah: "We'll certainly cater the set to the crowd and we try to change things up as much as we can. We picked songs in the set that are geared toward a certain audience, sometimes it's just whatever, these are the songs we like to play, but, yeah. [Laughs]" James: "I think ARSIS, I don't want to say we wear many hats, but we do have a lot of influences, we have a lot of influences that are not death metal and not extreme metal. To me, that's always been the one thing that made ARSIS stand apart is just that it was a take on extreme metal by a bunch of dudes that don't necessarily like extreme metal, if that makes sense. I like a lot of '80s synth-pop and I always have, like DEPECHE MODE and Noah is really into like power metal trad-metal, like WHITESNAKE, just really sleazy, slutty music and we all kind of bring different things to the table for dinner. The result is…" Noah: "One hell of a Venn diagram." James: It's one hell of a smorgasbord of stuff. I think promoters and booking agents kind of have this idea, 'Well, shit, ARSIS will fit on this because they have this one song with that breakdown.' It doesn't always work out as the intentions behind it, but, you know, I do also feel that we win over a lot of fans, too. We win people over as well. But, yeah, we cater the sets and we have to try to play up the situation as best as possible and yes, for instance, this tour is a very slam-heavy tour. The last tour we did was a very, maybe, more tech type of proggy, tech type of tour. I think we're still searching for the perfect tour for us, but I do think our music is varied enough that when it falls onto the right ears, it's pretty awesome." On the origins of ARSIS's sound: James: "When I started ARSIS, I was really into a lot of traditional metal stuff like CRIMSON GLORY, QUEENSRŸCHE, that sort of stuff. I had met the original drummer in ARSIS [Michael Van Dyne] who was into more extreme metal. He introduced me to the Scandinavian stuff like AT THE GATES, DISSECTION, I was just, like, 'I bet my riffs if I just made them a little bit faster and threw some of these nasty vocals on it, we'll see what happens.' I just started doing that. It was a weird take on extreme metal that wasn't necessarily influenced by extreme metal so much." "Visitant" was released November 2 via Nuclear Blast (North, Central, South America) and Agonia (rest of world). The disc was recorded in part and mixed and mastered by producer Mark Lewis (WHITECHAPEL, DEVILDRIVER, DEICIDE, CANNIBAL CORPSE). Artwork was created by longtime collaborator Mark Riddick.

[Read More ...]

MY BLOG: http://www.rockoutwithyourcockout.com/

from Rock Out With Your Cock Out http://www.blabbermouth.net/news/james-malone-thinks-arsis-stands-out-because-none-of-its-members-necessarily-like-extreme-metal/ via IFTTT

[bigthoughtsinthevernacular-blog]

Christian Schools

Here’s the thing about private Christian Schools. -I was taught from a young age that the secular world was something to be defended against.
-We were not allowed to watch Finding Nemo for a school movie night because Dory was voiced by a lesbian and our school didn’t want to deal with parental complaints.
-We have the cheesiest, tackiest school song you have EVER heard. 
-I have had a math teacher who does not believe women should pursue the maths and sciences. The same math teacher spends, on average, more time lecturing his honors class with variably offensive “devotions” instead of teaching. As a result, the students of this advanced class struggle more than most any other math class in the school. 
-I have had a science teacher who gave 20 minute devotions in his 50 minute class. Every. Single. Day. He is a terrible teacher, and he is constantly referring to aesthetic evolutionists as blind and willfully ignorant of the evidence of a creator.
-Harry Potter books are not allowed in the school library due to the complaints of versions parents.
-We have monthly chapels featuring some of the tackiest, most repetitive Christian music you have ever heard. 
-We have a teacher who is a total dress code nazi. She stalks the hallways and turns every dress code violation into a spiritual issue wherein girls are trying to seduce the guys at school. Honestly, these are eighth graders who just hit a growth spurt. There just AREN’T any dresses out there that are long enough.
-If an employee’s child drops out or switches schools for any reason (keep in mind, our school is INCREDIBLY driven and demanding on its students), the employee is no longer allowed to keep their job.
-if any student were to get pregnant, I’ve even heard that she would no longer be allowed to stay at school. I can only imagine that similar verdicts would be handed out to any student that came out as LGBTQ.

This is part of my Christian School, and I HATE the fact that any of these bullet points are true. 
But this is also my Christian School:

-At the beginning of every year, each member of SGA chooses one or two seventh graders to be their “buddy.” The older buddies make it their job to show the new middle-schoolers the ropes and to encourage their younger buddies. I remember my buddy constantly left me notes and brownies, and always waved to me in the hallway. She’s in college now, but we still stay in touch, even though I was doubtless completely irritating in seventh grade.

-Every single time I see a new kid walking around on orientation night, I always say hi and show them around the school for the rest of the night. They always seem shocked. Is that not something done in public school?

-You never hear hardly any cursing, ever. (This had two different benefits. 1. You learn to save swearing for when it really counts. And yeah, I do think there’s value in this. The less often you swear in everyday speech, the more potent it will be when you use it in fury. 2. You hear the FUNNIEST substitutions for insults.)

-Any time anyone gets bullied or even feels bullied, the administration comes down on the behavior harshly and immediately. I know one girl, new to the school, who was getting teased by a few of my classmates. They weren’t trying to be mean, they just didn’t know her that well and hurt her feelings while joking around and trying to be friendly. She got hand-written letters of apology from all of them.

-The school has never taken any government funding whatsoever. It doesn’t believe it merits any special grant etc. just because it’s a Christian School.

-That terrible science teacher I mentioned? Yeah, he’s an awful teacher. He has one of the biggest hearts I have ever known.

-All of my teachers are fine with me disagreeing with them on philosophy or religion, and I am free to argue with them on any of their statements as long as I do so in a respectful manner. They do not treat or grade me any differently as a student, and do not get angry with me for arguing my beliefs.

-Most of teachers disagree with evolution. However, any time they speak about it, they make an effort to disprove it through facts instead of relying on personal bias.

-Most of the teachers (of course there’s always ONE with a stick up their butt) are really easygoing with a student if they are usually hard-working but slip up on a deadline. I have had one teacher who always talked with his students first about when would be the best time for them to have a paper due. Even that he would change if there was a last-minute project or sports event.

-Our teachers are never afraid of giving us big essays or speeches to read that have bigger ideas behind them. They encourage us to learn on a massive scale and are always stretching our brains.

-The good teachers are CONSTANTLY encouraging us to learn outside of school and formulate our own beliefs. They will also always recommend books and articles to you on any given topic if you want them to.

-That one super-conservative politically right-wing kid in my class makes HUGE efforts to understand things like the values of nature and art and the feminist movement. He’s still conservative, but he never wants to be conservative based off of uneducated bias or prejudice.

-I got the chance to get to know one of the arguably hottest guys in my class this past year. I had never liked him or anything, but I just assumed he was kinda proud, pretty, and flirtatious. 
Instead, I met one of the sweetest guys I know. He has two sisters, so he is endlessly patient with women. He’s had a terrible crush on the same girl for years, and they just started dating. He’s always trying to protect, support, and care for her. He’s unendingly humble, always cheers for others, even if they’re not close friends of his, and is always trying to learn new things. He is also constantly searching for truth, reading tough philosophers like C.S. Lewis, Dorothy Sayers, and G.K. Chesterton in the pursuit of figuring out and understanding his Christian faith.

-My best friend is always quiet. She loves with her whole heart, and is one of the most generous people I know. Her hobby is making THOUSANDS of hand-folded paper hearts out of expensive patterned paper she buys herself. She always keeps a jar of these hearts in her locker to give people who are having a bad day, and my entire school loves her.

-lockers never have locks, and we have never had any theft resulting from this rule.

-I have yet to meet a “smart kid” who proudly flaunts their smarts. They’re all humble.

-The teachers (all except the weird 5%) are like family, constantly joking, encouraging, and supporting the students.

-In EARLY middle school, puberty hit me like a truck, and while all the other girls in my class were thin, beautiful, and athletic, I looked like a potato. I never once, ONCE got even slightly teased or even looked at funny because of my appearance.

-Cliques are rare and usually thought of as ridiculous by the rest of the school. Like yeah, there are friend groups, but they intermingle. -My entire class is athletic. I am not. I sing, I draw, and when I try to play volleyball everyone around me dies a little inside. However, my class has been endlessly encouraging and loving to me despite our differences.

-The people in my school are always trying to do the loving thing for the person beside them. They are always searching for knowledge as humbly as they can. They are always trying to be inclusive, kind, and supportive of others, even if others are different. They never think of themselves as perfect, right, or correct, but are always trying to learn and get better.

So yes, Christian schools can be screwed. They can have weird teachers, policies, and teachings that are completely messed up. But can’t all schools? 
Just… please don’t forget that at the heart of some Christian schools there is a deep humility and care for others that can be overshadowed by bad stereotypes.

[the-telegraph-sport-yahoopa-blog]

From an all-night party to signing 'Dimitri Payet' - a whirlwind week at FA Cup underdogs Sutton United

Ahead of Sunday’s tie with Leeds, Sutton United manager Paul Doswell reveals how life has been turned upside down at the lowest-ranked side left in the FA Cup...

Tuesday

After we beat Wimbledon, I tell my wife Kate not to expect to see me back home for 72 hours. I am really going to enjoy the moment. I tell the lads to enjoy it too. And if I’m honest the party nearly does go on as long as I’d warned her. 

What a win it was for us and we celebrate long and hard into the night. The fun starts in the dressing room at Kingsmeadow. Someone cranks up the CD player and everyone’s dancing. But obviously the Wimbledon staff want to lock up and go home as soon as possible, so the party shifts to our place at Gander Green Lane, just up the road. 

By the time I get there after speaking to the media, things are well under way. I don’t leave till four in the morning. I have to drive back to Winchester where I live, so go about 10mph all the way. Still, at least I make it home. I’m told four of the lads don’t. They are found the next morning asleep in the vice-president’s office. I’ll not name and shame. But they know who they are.

Sutton's players partied long into the night after beating Wimbledon

Wednesday

For me, getting back to the day job isn’t a problem. I help run Drew Smith, a £100 million turnover construction business in Hampshire. My brother, who is my partner, is incredibly supportive. It’s not a normal job, mine. 

My input involves loads of driving to and from meetings with architects and clients. So I do a lot of work on the road. Today most of the calls are about football. The reaction from colleagues and clients to the win is brilliant. I get so many messages. So many people are chuffed. There’s no better story than the underdog.

Thursday

We train on Thursdays, which means a two-hour drive to Sutton. I make a load of work calls on the road. To be honest, from the moment I arrive at the ground, we don’t mention the Wimbledon win. We have an important National League game against Eastleigh to prepare for and the lads are really focused on that. This is our bread and butter, we have to concentrate all our minds on the league.

Paul Doswell has his eyes on the prize Credit: david rose

Friday

Friday is always date night with Kate. She is my best mate, so she gets attention. I have got seven children as well, so they obviously deserve plenty of attention. And I have to do some work occasionally. Kate appreciates what a passion football is for me. She’s been on that touchline with me watching our kids play, she’s a Southampton season-ticket holder, we go to away games together too when we can. We went to Prague and Milan for the Europa League games. She loves her football. If I said to you she’d happily go without shoes for me to have my football, that gives you an idea.

Saturday

We play Eastleigh at home and get a draw. It’s a big game for me. I was manager there for six seasons, got them from the Wessex League right up to Conference South. Not a lot was said about my time there, but we got five promotions. My biggest achievement was leaving them an all-weather pitch that they could start their academy on. I left them with an infrastructure. My company also built the stand there. I’m not bitter – too much – but there was not enough recognition given. Now they’ve got big money behind them. I’ve heard Martin Allen the manager there is on £200,000 a year. Which is £200,000 more than I’m on at Sutton.

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Tuesday

I’d mentioned on the radio that we’d probably spend some of the money from the Wimbledon win on some new tiles for the entrance hall at our stadium. Let’s just say they were a little 1960s. It shows the power of the FA Cup that almost as soon as that interview went out, B&Q got in touch to say they’d like to donate the tiles to us.

They arrange to have them delivered by this lad who works for them at their West Ham depot who is the spitting image of Dimitri Payet. So we do a photo shoot with him and me saying I’d like to introduce our new signing … some B&Q tiles. 

Mind you, I’d love to sign Payet. Imagine the look on the Leeds players’ faces if they saw him lining up for us. Perhaps I’ll invite the lookalike along on Sunday to put the wind up them.

Who's that chap on the right? Is it Dimitri Payet?

Wednesday

I’m a massive Southampton fan. In fact, I think I might have shocked a few when I was asked before the last round who I’d want to win if Sutton drew Southampton in the Cup and I said the Saints. Hands down, every time I would. I had tickets for the EFL Cup semi-final second leg at Anfield. 

It shows how committed I must be to Sutton that with the Cup game against Leeds coming up I decide to give the tickets to my son. I watch the match on the telly and it is just brilliant. I’m so chuffed, I go to bed singing “We’re on our way to Wembley”. Trouble is, I’m so excited I can’t get to sleep. About 3am I suddenly remember we are playing Leeds on Sunday, so I go downstairs to watch a recording of them playing Nottingham Forest. Go to bed about five. Then I have to get up at six to drive to Sutton. Sleep? What’s that?

Thursday

We have our big media day ahead of the Leeds game. The interest has been brilliant. I was very critical before the last round of the fact we hadn’t been picked by television for a live game. I felt the BBC in particular shouldn’t be chasing ratings by putting Man United on every time. They should be using their position to enhance the game at the bottom of the pyramid. That said, except for their choice of live game, I’ve no argument with the Beeb. We had Football Focus down here before the Wimbledon game and they were great. This time, we’ve been chosen by BT as their live match on Sunday and we’re going to make the most of it.

One thing all this publicity does is allow us to show the world what a wonderful club Sutton is. We’ve got three ladies here, in their eighties and nineties, do teas, coffees, sandwiches, and they love it. I think our ground will look wonderful on the telly. Sure it’s a bit like an old house in that it needs constantly updating. I remember doing a half-time team talk in our dressing room last season, standing between two buckets which were catching the drips from the leaking roof. But we’ve repaired that using the money from the Cup run. 

Funniest TripAdvisor reviews of Premier League stadiums

And we’ve painted it, because it was a little mouldy. We’ve even spruced up the away dressing room. Mind, I’m not sure Leeds will have experienced a dressing room like it.

In the build-up a lot has been made of our pitch. The fact it’s a 3G is supposed to give us a huge advantage. Which is ridiculous. Because I know for a fact that Leeds have got a 3G pitch exactly like it at their training ground, so Garry Monk will have done all his sessions on that this week. They won’t be taken by surprise.

And actually, if you saw the state of the pitch at Wimbledon for the replay, you’d agree with me ours is way superior. That was a horrible mess of a pitch, really badly drained. Ours is always excellent. Plus it is a big money-spinner for us as we can constantly rent it out to community groups. Even if it takes 20 years, I think we will eventually see a time when every club up to League One have a 3G pitch. When clubs are struggling financially, it makes sense.

Friday

I’ve been asked what I might learn from going up against a coach as good as Monk. Without seeming arrogant, I honestly believe the only advantages he has over me are those of time and facilities. I think everyone involved at Sutton has the self-belief we could make the step up. I run a £100 million company, I back myself against anyone when it comes to man-management. If I’m honest it’s not rocket science being a football manager. Actually, I’d go further: football is the s-----est business I’ve ever been involved in. It’s full of selfish people who don’t know a lot else. They think that because they’re good at football they can be a good football manager. That’s not always the case. I’ve seen some awful football managers in the Football League. Their man-management skills are appalling.

Paul Doswell (left) believes his side can cause an almighty upset Credit: david rose

Saturday

I’ve been asked so many times whether we can win this tie. My heart says we can, my head tends to disagree. You never know in sport. No one gave Oliver McCall a chance when he took on Lennox Lewis. But he won. There’s always a chance. On Sunday, we intend to be 11 Oliver McCalls. And a lot will depend on what team Leeds put out. Their priority is promotion, getting into the Premier League is what is on their minds 24/7. So the chances are Monk will rest some of the team I watched in their win over Forest. But even if he brings in the youngsters, we can be sure they’ll be real quality. For me, a draw would be a fantastic result. Imagine taking a team to Elland Road for the replay. I’d love that.

One thing I can guarantee is that if we do lose, we will lose gloriously. We will go down all guns blazing. At Sutton, what we are all gearing ourselves up for is to make sure this is the best day of our footballing lives.