#i just wanna do the dumb quiz- then i can spend the rest of the day dealing with cramps and jazz asdjhkl

[cluelesslesbian]

very rude of my period to make me insanely tired today?? I'm trying to study for a quiz and yet?????? I've napped like twice today already 💀

[americaswritings]

Invisible

Warnings: Angst, Insecurity & Self-doubt, Language

Summary: The reader stays with Tom and his friends during quarantine. To protect her from media and fans, the reader can’t been seen in any social media posts. It leads to her feeling more and more lonely and isolated until she can’t take it anymore.

Words: 2.6k 

Pairings: Tom Holland x reader

A/N: I wrote this when Tom hosted the marvel pub quiz, but completely forgot to post it!

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"That's it. Thank you for joining and taking part in the quiz! I hope you had as much fun as we did and don't forget to post your answers using the hashtag massive marvel pub quiz so we can find your answers easier. Stay safe and healthy. Bye guys!"

You watched as Tom's face disappeared and the live stream ended.

But the excitement that you had felt when you had first heared of the idea of a marvel quiz was gone. Now you just felt empty. And alone.

You knew that you were overreacting, after all Tom and the others were just a few rooms away, but you couldn't help and feel left out. Again.

You weren't invited to join the live stream in the first place so why join them know?

You knew that Tom only wanted to protect you and himself by keeping you out of the public's eye. If they found out that a female in his age was spending the time during quarantine at his house, they would go wild. You could already imagine the headlines that would follow.

After all Tom had exerperienced how far his ‘fans’ and the media would go when a photo of him and Olivia had gone viral.

Only a few blurry images and both Tom and Olivia had been attacked for weeks, even so far that the girl had to make her instagram private, yet the hate comments never stopped.

And Tom knew that he would never risk the chance of you having to read through pages of hate comments of people that didn't even know you. Because if they did, they knew they could never hate you.

You were kind and loving and you cared a little too deeply.

Tom still remembered when you had called him crying, because you didn't feel confident enough to go out after some girls in your class had made it their mission to target all your insecurities and make mean comments whenever you passed them.

He still remembered the anger and hate he felt inside of him when he listened to your sobbing and how the girl's words had gotten to you, to the point you even believed them.

So when you had moved in with him and the boys, he had decided to keep you out of everything that could reveal to the world that you were living with them. You had agreed without a second doubt, because in that moment it seemed the only rational and responsible thing to do.

Now you weren't so sure anymore, because it hurt so much to be invisible every day. You had gotten used to the fact that you could only watch their instagram stories, live streams and tik toks without being able to join them. But what hurt you even more were the little things.

"Hey y/n, could you leave the room for a sec? You are always in the background of the video!"

A second often turned into hours and soon you found yourself retreating to your room more and more to avoid having to leave and get hurt again.

Yesterday you had decided to do a little game night and you felt so carefree that you came to the conclusion that you were being ridiculous and should rather enjoy the time with them instead of obsessing over your feelings. But then you had laughed over something that had been said and Tom has sighed, dropping his phone.

"Great, now I have to delete that, because you were laughing in the background", he stated, clearly frustrated and you felt heat rushing to your cheeks.

"I'm sorry", you mumbled but it sounded more like a question than a sincere apologzy, because really, what where you even apologizing for? Harrsion had leaned over to get a better look at Tom's phone. "That would have been a great post, mate!"

You adverted your eyes, starring at the table and analysing the natural pattern of the wood to try and distract yourself from the embarassment and the tears that had filled your eyes. "I know right", Tom sighed again and you crounched down in your seat even more.

"I will do that again now so you have to be completely quiet now y/n, got it?

You wanted to scream at them, because you weren't dumb and yet they were treating you like a child that had misbehaved and was now lectured. But you only gulped and nodded, fearing that if you said something, your voice would break and reveal how hurt you really felt.

While they recorded the story again, you listened to their loud laughter as you fought back the tears.

Eventually you excued yourself, mumbling something about having a headache, but you doubted that they even noticed.

Now you could hear them laugh again and even though Tom's laugh was one of your favorite sounds, it now cut deeper into your heart like a knife. 

You were still staring at your phone screen where you saw photos of answer sheets already popping up. You had gotten around 20 answers right, but you didn't feel proud.

When Tom had told you about the marvel quiz you had been beyond excited. Since you could remember you loved the marvel movies. Your rooms had been filled with posters and other merchandise and your friends only rolled their eyes when you suggested to watch a marvel movie during your movie nights.

You had build your knowdlege over the years and loved to challenge Tom, who thought of himself as a big marvel fan as well, regarding who knew more about the marvel cinematic universe.

So when he came up with the idea of a marvel live quiz, you insisted to take part and therefore hear the questions for the first time during the stream so you had the same chance as everyone else.

But as soon as Harry and Harrison had joined the live stream your enthusiasm had faded. They were having so much fun and you were sitting in your room, all on your own. The familiar feeling of loneliness and self doubt had accompained you the rest of the live stream and now that it had ended you just wanted to crawl under the covers and weep into your pillow.

Maybe you were clingy and needy and overthinking again, but you couldn't help the overwhelming sadness and you began to doubt if staying with Tom was a mistake and if your friendship meant more to you than the others.

Maybe you should pack your things tomorrow and tell Tom that you needed to go home. He would understand if you claimed to miss the comfort of being at your home but then again, you would be even more lonely.

Frustrated you threw your phone on the nightstand and quickly changed into your pajamas before crawling into bed.

In the darkness of the room the disappointment felt even more overwhelming and you grabbed onto your pillow for comfort.

A knock made you freeze and your heart started pouding in your chest. You prayed that the person would leave you alone and go away if you pretended to be asleep so you stayed silent.

"Y/n?"

It was Tom's voice.

"We want to watch a movie. Wanna join us?"

You knew that he wouldn't go away until the got an answer so you dismissed your plan and braced yourself to speak.

"No, I am tired, but thanks." You hoped that Tom didn't notice how nervous you sounded and after an agonizing moment of silence you could hear him mutter an "okay" and walk away.

Did you imagine it or did he sound disapppointed? Now feeling guilty too, you covered your face in your hands in frustration.

Why did everything have to go wrong?

And wait...did you still have your make-up on?

You let out a sound of frustration when you realized that you had to get up again to wipe off your make-up. You had applied it because you wanted to feel your best during the quiz you had been so excited for, but now it meant walking all the way to the bathroom.

Which meant leaving your room again.

You slowly opened your door, peeking out to check if the corridors were empty. You proceeded to tiptoe to the bathroom and closed the door behind you while relief flooded you. You really didn't want to meet anyone now, not when you felt like breaking into tears every second.

When you looked into the mirror and began to wash your make-up off, you allowed yourself to let the tears flow. A few sobs escaped your mouth, but the bathroom was far enough from the living room so they wouldn't be able to hear you.

Without the make-up on, you felt a little more relaxed and you couldn't wait to get into bed again.

But when you reached your room without running into anyone on the way, you were more than surprised to see that once you had closed the door and turned around, you weren't alone.

Tom was sitting on your bed, looking up at you when you entered the room.

You could conclude from the frown that covered his face that you looked as horrible as you felt. Your eyes were probably still puffy and red from the crying and your hair was in a messy bun.

"Tom?", you stuttered, too shocked to come up with something that would save you from this conversation. "What are you doing here?", you added, hating how weak your voice sounded.

His frown grew even deeper and he mustered your apperance, hurt visible in his eyes.

"You were so excited for the quiz so when you didn't leave your room I grew worried", he explained while you akwardly stood next to the door, leaving as much space between the two of you as possible.

"Oh that- I just didn't feel good so I decided to sleep early today", you tried to brush it off, but you knew that Tom would not fall for it.

"Why have you been crying?"

His question was acommpanied by a stern gaze and you couldn't help feeling guilty and ashamed.

"I- I wasn't", you stuttered, but it didn't even sound believable to your own ears. Tom raised his eyebrow, but when he saw how uncomfortable you looked his features softened.

"Hey, you can talk to me, you know that right? Whatever it is, you can tell me and we can figure this out together." His voice was so gentle and caring that tears filled your eyes again and you silently cursed yourself for being so emotional.

You didn't want to cry in front of Tom. It would not be the first time and when it had happened he had always managed to make you feel better and put a smile on your face again, but you also knew the shame that would follow afterwards.

You didn't want him to think that you were too sensitive.

But the tears weren't only a result of your hurt, no, anger was building inside of you at his words. "Really Tom, really?", you snapped and he flinched in surprise.

"Are you sure you want me to talk to you? Maybe someone is filming an instagram story and I could be heard in the background so I should just say nothing at all. Or even better, why don't I just leave the room so there is a lesser chance that I could ruin your precious masterpieces by just existing."

Tom's eyes had widened at your outburst and you actually felt bad for a second, but then you remembered the many occasions he had made you feel like you weren't good enough and the anger came back.

"You know what? I think it would be best if I just went home. I am done being treated like an outsider and being blamed for everything I do!"

Tom had jumped up from the bed and was crossing the distance between the two of you with large steps, but you raised your hands before he could come closer to you.

"Y/n I am so sorry", he stumbled over his words, desperately trying to find the right words. "I didn't realize- I never would have..." Frustrated he ran a hand through his hair.

"Listen, I screwed up! I didn't realize that my behaviour- that I was hurting you and I am so sorry! I just wanted to protect you and now I am the one making you feel this way. Fuck, I am so sorry!"

His words seemed geniune and your heart ached to step forward and pull him into a hug, but you knew that you could not forget so easily.

"I didn't think that this was so important to you. Why didn't you say anything?" He was rubbing the back of his head, seemingly tensed.

"I don't care much about not being in the stories Tom. But it really hurt whenever I am send away so you can film together or when I am told to shut up so I can't be heard while you all have fun together”, you explained, trying to keep your vice even.

“I just feel like I am a burden to you and if you don't want to spend time with me that's fine I guess but I would appreciate for you to tell me that so I can stop trying and just go home."

"No, no, no it's not like that I swear!” Tom seemed desperate again, articulating with his hands to underline his words.

“I miss spending time with you, I really do and it was stupid of me to let myself being dragged into this whole instagram thing!

You know I am normally not the person to care much about posting, but I thought now that everyone is stuck at home, I could make my fans happy and distract them from the situation by sharing more of my life. I should have never put them before you and I am truly sorry!” You could see the regret clearly in his eyes as he took in a deep breath. 

“Please don't go."

You were biting your lip as you were trying your best to stay calm and not break into tears. You had imagined confronting Tom and letting all your anger and hurt out, but now that he stood in front of you with his eyes full of hurt and regret and his pleading words for you to stay, your anger vanished.

"Are you sure?", you asked him in uncertainty, because you knew you couldn't bare if nothing would change. But Tom desperately nodded. "I am. Tomorrow I am going to post a photo to let my fans now that I am taking a break from social media!"

He looked so determined, so sure, that a warm feeling filled you. "You would do that?"

"Of course! I want to make it up to you and besides I was not lying when I said that I miss spending time with you”, he stated, stepping a little closer to you when you didn’t protest anymore.

“You were so distant the last days and I didn't know what to do, so I thought that I should give you space. Seems like that is the last thing I should have done", he sayed with a sheepish smile covering his face.

"Sorry for being so caught up in myself. I should have said something earlier too", you admitted, a small smile forming on your lips, when you felt the burden fall off your shoulders.

"Hug?", Tom suggested and you didn't have to think twice about it.

When he wrapped his strong arms around you, you realized that going back to your place would have been a mistake. Because at some point your home hadn't been a place anymore. Instead it had become a person and you didn't plan on letting go any time soon.

----

Tags:

PERMANENT: @fairytalesforever @hamartocado @capkilljoy​ @choke-me-sweet-pea @sleepinginthegarden7 @thenoddingbunny-blog @ttalisa​

TOM HOLLAND: @mbsgr​ @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory​ @fairydustparker​ @its-the-unknownspideywrites​ @tomhollanders2013​ @hollandsmiss​ ​ @100kindsofblake​ @popluckbih​ @quaksonhehe​​

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[bobohu4eva]

Pink Lace - Chapter 3

Characters: Baekhyun x Reader

Genre: College AU, stripper AU, fluff, smut, slow burn

Summary: Baekhyun, a philosophy professor with mysterious wealth, got himself completely fucked over a girl who can’t let him into her life.

Word count: 5k

Warnings: mentions of sexual assault, sex work, adult themes/situations, eventual smut

Tag List: @smolbeanmika @leave-me-in-the-summertime @totallynerdstuff @bbhmystar @nana-banan @kimyhappy @thegreatandi @geniusloey   @deligxt @baekwifey @rockerbbhyun @lovebuginlove @bellamendoza

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Class on Friday was less terrifying. You arrived earlier than you had Wednesday, and sat with Lucas as you’d promised. 

You told yourself that Baekhyun was just another one of your professors, and you needed to get your head on straight and pay attention, especially since the class was already more challenging than you’d thought. You were starting to get worried that you’d embarrass yourself by doing poorly, and you definitely didn’t want Baekhyun to think you were stupid. You knew you weren’t, but you also knew that this class wasn’t your strength. 

You noticed Baekhyun walk in and take a seat at his desk. He looked happy to see you back in his class, and this time without you trying to avoid him. You gave him a shy smile, still feeling fairly awkward around him. 

“So that party’s tonight, any chance I can still convince you to come?” You heard Lucas say next to you, flashing you a smile.

“I told you I’m not really a fan of parties, sorry.” You responded, avoiding his eyes and fidgeting with the things on your desk.

You were acutely aware of Baekhyun listening to your conversation from his desk a few feet away.

“Aw come on, even if I’m there? I promise it’ll be fun.”

Baekhyun was listening. And he felt his face harden and fists clench at the boy’s pushiness.

“I have homework, I don’t have time to go out.” You looked at him now, trying to get the point across. You just really didn’t want to go.

“But it’s the first party of the year! I promise you won’t regret it.” He continued anyway, now grabbing your hand. Baekhyun narrowed his eyes. 

Panicking slightly, you blurted out “I can’t anyway, I have work” as you pulled your hand away from his.

Baekhyun cocked up an eyebrow, wondering what’ll happen next.

“Work? Where at?”

“I’m a waitress, at a bar across town, you wouldn’t know about it.” You stammered, building on your lie.

Baekhyun quietly chuckled to himself, now obviously amused. Especially when he knew what your real job was.

“But what if you got someone to-”

“She said she didn’t wanna go, so drop it.” Baekhyun suddenly interrupted, voice calm but stern. Before you and Lucas even had time to react, he was getting up from his desk and starting the lecture, and you found yourself opening your notebook.

As the class went on you understood less and less of what Baekhyun was saying. You were quickly learning that philosophy meant reading lots of things that were old as hell, and nearly impossible to understand. Your own notes weren’t even really making sense to you and you knew you’d have to go back over them later if you really wanted to understand the material. Who knew philosophy would be such a bitch of a class.

Near the end of class, Baekhyun started handing out a short pop quiz and you felt yourself getting nervous.

When he handed you yours, he mouthed “good luck” with a smile. When you read the question you cursed yourself for having been so distracted the first few days. You had no idea what the difference between moral relativism and objectivism was anymore, nor any of the other things he’d talked about. Despite taking notes, it was just too difficult for you to make sense of the things he taught with so many other things running through your mind.

Baekhyun noticed how stressed you looked as he watched you stare down at your paper. Every time you’d start to write something, you’d stop and erase it. Time was ticking by and you didn’t have much left until he’d collect everyone’s papers.

This wasn’t like you at all. Usually you could remember things easily and ace pop quizzes without a problem, but Baekhyun was too distracting. Especially when you knew he was watching you and you knew he was waiting to see what you’d write.

Eventually you started scribbling down something incredibly vague and almost definitely incorrect, but at least it was something.

Although Baekhyun could tell you were struggling with the assignment, he still found it amusing to watch you as you tried to figure it out. He lost count of how many times you brushed your hair behind your ear, only to have it fall right back in your face again. He could almost see the gears turning in your head as you mulled over the question and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen something so cute.

When he got up to collect everyone’s quizzes you were still frantically trying to finish your paragraph. When he got to you you were almost finished. You looked up at him, silently begging for more time, and he gave you a soft smile. He went to take the papers from the rest of the students in your row first before eventually coming back to you. Yours was the last paper he took, and you cringed as you saw him start to read over it immediately as he made his way back to his desk, brows furrowed.

Once he’d collected the quizzes from the students they were free to go, making you the last one in the room with him again.

“Thank you.” You said. “For giving me more time. I promise I’m not stupid it’s just been hard for me to focus.” Baekhyun was glad you seemed comfortable enough to talk to him like this, and couldn’t fight the smile that was creeping onto his face. 

“I know” he looked at you with sincerity “you can go home” he looked over at the door “I’m not gonna make you stay again. I’m sorry for Monday. That was mean.” You could tell by the way he looked down at his desk after he finished speaking, he really was sorry.

You felt a small smile start to form on your lips.

“It’s okay, I shouldn’t have freaked out so bad.”

“No, I shouldn’t have talked to you like I did. You were obviously uncomfortable, it was a dick move to make you stay.”

You giggled, pleased that he could admit he acted poorly. “It’s okay, really. I was just in shock.”

“Well it won’t happen again.” He gave you a smile so full of warmth and you couldn’t help but smile back. “Don’t forget that essay is due Wednesday night.”

“I can remember a simple due date Baekhyun. I told you I’m not dumb.” You rolled your eyes, walking towards the door.

“It’s still Mr. Byun when we’re here!” He yelled after you playfully.

“Okay Baekhyun!” You yelled back, waving as you walked out the door.

Baekhyun’s face hurt from how hard he was smiling, very much pleased by how you seemed more comfortable today. He silently patted himself on the back for it, relieved that you wouldn’t be a nervous wreck every class anymore. Your answer on the quiz hadn’t been too bad either, despite how stressed you’d looked.

Hopefully, just maybe, this meant you would start opening up to him more.

~

You spent Friday night doing homework as planned, and when Saturday morning rolled around and you started getting ready for work, you started to worry about whether or not Baekhyun would show up. You both hoped he’d show up just for the money, and dreaded the awkwardness if he did. You decided to just assume he wouldn’t show and go about the night as if he didn’t matter.

You added some last touches to your makeup, opting for something natural and glowy to go with your glittery pink outfit you’d packed for the night.

“I like the outfit tonight” Dave said, winking at you as you checked in. “New shoes?”

“No. I got these a few weeks ago.”

“Come on Candy, loosen up.”

You cringed but gave him a smile anyway, not wanting to get on your manager’s bad side.

For the first time in months you were going to have to spend a Saturday night trying to talk to random guys to sell dances, something you hated. Half of them would likely waste your time anyway, the other half would give you money but you never knew what bs they’d try to pull when getting their dance.

You stood by the bar, facing into the room looking for someone who didn’t seem too bad. Eventually a group of guys around your age came in and you sat down with them.

“So what’s your name gorgeous?” One of them asked you, already slightly drunk.

“I’m Candy” you told them, asking for their names as well. They all introduced themselves and soon went back to laughing amongst themselves, until a waitress showed up.

“Shots of patron, and two for the lady” one of them ordered, and you didn’t object. In the back of your mind you were still worried about Baekhyun showing up, and drinking would easily help you forget.

You took the shots. And then two more. Your stomach felt pleasantly warm, and you kept laughing at whatever the men around you were saying, though you didn’t really listen. You could hear your words slur together when you spoke, but the comfortable haze felt nice to you and you let yourself get lost in the feeling.

Eventually they ordered a 3rd round, at which point you were thoroughly tipsy and probably shouldn’t have had any more, but with the thought of Baekhyun still in the back of your mind, and the alcohol clouding your judgement, you swallowed down the fifth and sixth shots with little thought. Although by then you weren’t counting anymore. They went down like nothing, body already numb to the sting.

You were laughing at something someone said, mind going hazy from the liquor as everything around you began to go blurry. You tried to stand up but nearly fell, having trouble standing on your heels on your own. You sat back down, closing your eyes, and the room felt like it was spinning out of control. You vaguely heard the chatter of the men around you saying something, but before you had time to process their words everything went black.

Next thing you knew, your head was on Baekhyun’s lap and he was staring down at you.

~

Baekhyun wasn’t sure if he was going to go that night. As much as he wanted to see you, he wasn’t sure you’d want to see him there again.

As the night went on he tried to distract himself, grade some papers, watch some TV, but nothing worked. No matter what he did, you were stuck in the back of his mind. He wanted, needed to see you again. As long as he paid you, you wouldn’t be too mad to see him there, and two of you could just act like it was any other Saturday night, right? 

Not wanting to think about it too much, he got his shoes on, grabbed his wallet, and walked out the door.

When he arrived, he didn’t see you at the bar where you usually stood and waited for him. Upon looking around the main room of the club, he didn’t see you either, and his heart rate started to go up. What if you were stuck in a VIP room with some creep who was making you uncomfortable?

Baekhyun started to wander around the room to look for you. He checked every booth and could see every table, you had to be upstairs in a room. He hated to admit it to himself but even just the thought of you being up there with someone who wasn’t terrible bothered him. Thinking about you grinding on strangers at all made his stomach churn.

To calm his nerves he stood by the bar and ordered himself a drink, and not even a minute went by before there was a girl standing in front of him.

“Hey handsome, what are you doing here? You’re awful cute to be in a place like this.”

She started to touch Baekhyun’s arm and he slapped her hand away, turning around and gulping down his drink.

The girl frowned, but persisted anyway.

“So why are you here? Looking for some fun?”

“I’m looking for my friend.” He replied, eyes still scanning the room, ignoring her.

“I’m sure I can show you a good time too you know..” she stepped closer, blocking his view of the rest of the room.

Baekhyun dug in his pocket and pulled out a 50, holding it up with an annoyed look on his face.

“It’s yours if you leave.”

She took the bill, scoffing and turning around to walk away. Baekhyun faced his back towards the room and kept his eyes on the stairs, waiting for you to come down.

10 minutes went by, and then 10 more. Baekhyun couldn’t help but get more and more nervous. He knew it was pretty rare for people to spend that much time up there. He ordered himself another drink and started getting fidgety, trying to distract himself from worrying too much. 

A few more girls came up to him, but he quickly sent each one of them away.

After about 15 more minutes you finally appeared, and Baekhyun’s worst fears were realized when he saw you nearly unconscious, basically being carried down the stairs by 2 men. Immediately his mouth went dry and he felt his stomach do a flip.

You had your arm around one of the men’s shoulders, and the other had his hand on your lower back as you clumsily made your way down, nearly falling several times. You hadn’t even put your top back on, probably too wasted to notice it was missing anyway. The two men sat you down in an empty chair near the bottom of the stairs and went back to their group across the room with disgustingly smug looks on their faces. Baekhyun would’ve loved to walk right up to them and deck each of them in the face, but the last thing he needed now was to get himself kicked out while you were alone, completely incoherent, and surrounded by strange men. He cursed himself for not being able to do anything about them, but you were more important now.

He quickly made his way over to you, crouching down in front of you and grabbing your hand between his as he desperately tried to get a response from you.

“Hey, it’s me, say something.”

You could only mumble something incoherent.

“Can you open your eyes and look at me?”

You just shook your head slightly, brows furrowed.

“Fuck” Baekhyun whispered. He saw other people beginning to give him weird looks, and decided to take you to a room upstairs. “Come on, let’s get you out of here.” He slung your arm around his shoulder and kept a firm grip on your waist as he got you to stand up. 

He helped your mostly limp body up the stairs, and into the room. He let go of you for a second, and immediately you fell onto the couch, hitting your head on the wall in the process. He flinched, hearing the impact.

“Shit” he heard you say and saw you rub your head where it made contact with the wall.

“Sorry.” He knew you couldn’t process his words in your drunken state, but he said it anyway.

He handed you your bra, which had been dangling off one of your arms when you came down the stairs and he helped you get it back on. He helped you out of your shoes as well and laid you down on the couch. He sat down and you put your head in his lap, curling up against him and quickly passing back out. He gently rubbed the bump on your head, and heard you hum at the feeling. He looked around to see your money bag discarded on the floor and when he picked it up to set it on the small table in the corner he noticed it was empty. Those creeps had stolen your money and left you without paying.

Baekhyun looked at his watch and took his wallet out of his pocket. 10:04pm.

He stuffed $800 dollars in your bag, and looked down at you asleep in his lap as he stroked your hair.

The whole time you slept Baekhyun couldn’t help but run his fingers along the lines of your jaw, lips, and brows. Although he hated that those guys had gotten you like this, now, peacefully asleep in his lap, he thought you were the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. He ran his thumb across your cheek and noticed your eye twitch, and then open. As you looked up at him, he knew you were still too far gone to understand what was happening.

“What’sgoingon” you slurred, rubbing your eyes and sitting up.

“Some guys got you way too drunk, and then you hit your head.”

“Ohhhh” you sighed absentmindedly, not really having heard or understood what Baekhyun said.

“Come here, you’re still drunk.”

You seemed to listen, laying your head back in his lap and dozing off again. Another hour went by and he looked at his watch. It was after midnight, so he put another stack of cash in your bag. The movement seemed to be enough to wake you up this time, and when you opened your eyes you were a bit more aware of your surroundings. You shifted to lay on your back, looking directly up at him.

“Baekhyun” you groaned, still fairly drunk “why are you here?”

“I’m here every Saturday night.” He replied simply, smiling down at you in his lap. Gently he moved a strand of hair out of your face, and you felt yourself go red. Although you were now sober enough to know something was very wrong, with the way he looked at you in that moment, with so much warmth and admiration, you couldn’t help but feel warm and fuzzy inside.

You closed your eyes again and smiled, enjoying the feeling of Baekhyun caressing your cheek with the back of his hand in your drunken haze. No matter what shit had gone down earlier in the night, and why you were here with your head in his lap, this felt like bliss. You could’ve stayed like that for hours, just enjoying his gentle hands admiring your face.

“What time is it?” You asked lazily.

“12:15.”

“Fuck.” Your head snapped up and you sat next to Baekhyun, immediately feeling dizzy due to your intoxication. Head pounding, you rubbed your temples to try to relive some of the pain. “It’s that late? You never stay this late.”

“You’ve been sleeping for a while now.”

“Huh?”

“How are you feeling?

“Kind of drunk... and my head hurts. But what happened?” You slurred your words slightly, alcohol still apparent in your system.

He looked at you with sorry eyes. “Well, some assholes got you fucked up out of your mind. After I got here they came down the stairs and basically just dumped you into an empty chair and left, so I took you up here to sleep it off. You hit your head too, so be careful.” He rubbed the lump on the side of your head again, making you groan.

The terrified look on your face told him all he needed to know. He was about to see you cry for the first time, and he felt his heart drop.

“W-what? They took me upstairs?” A tear escaped, and more followed. “Who?”

“I don’t know. Some younger guys. I’d have beat the shit out of them if it wouldn’t get me kicked out.” You sensed the anger in his voice as he spoke. “Your bag was empty too by the way.”

Slowly you started piecing things together in your head, stomach churning with disgust and now fully crying.

“W-what, h-how did I-”

“No. This wasn’t your fault.” He interrupted, afraid this would happen. Afraid you would blame yourself. “They were assholes. They knew what they were doing.”

In reality, Baekhyun blamed himself. He knew you’d probably been nervous about whether or not he would show up. He should’ve been there earlier. But all that mattered now is that you were okay. At least physically.

As you sat next to him, head in your hands crying, he felt helpless. All he wanted to do was hold you tight and tell you all the things he was too scared to say out loud. But all he could manage was a comforting hand on your shoulder.

Your sobs got more intense and he was caught off guard when you threw your arms around him, head buried into his chest as you kept quietly crying. Reluctantly, his arms found their way around you as well, holding you as you shook in his arms.

“Hey hey, it’s okay, I’m here, you’re okay now. I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.” He said softly, rubbing soothing circles onto your back.

“Thank you” you choked out between sobs. Embarrassed, but still too drunk to stop yourself, you held on to Baekhyun tighter and tighter. You hated to admit it but you already felt much better with his arms wrapped around you. The gentle feeling of his chest rising and falling against yours, compared to your erratic breaths, felt like heaven. “Thank you, l-I’m sorry.” 

“Shhh” he said, stroking your hair. “You don’t need to apologize.”

“B-but you stayed here with m-me the whole time.” You sobbed.

“That’s okay, I came here to spend time with you didn’t I?”

“Why are you like this? W-why me?” You asked, leaning back to look at him.

Baekhyun sighed.

You’d avoided the question when you were sober for a reason. You knew Baekhyun liked you too much, more than he should, and you didn’t need to know the details. It would only make you feel more guilty later. But now, with alcohol to give you courage you didn’t hold back.

“You know how much I like you.” He responds quietly, giving you a soft smile. “It’s stupid, I know.”

Another tear fell, and Baekhyun was quick to wipe it away. Even with makeup running down your face he looked at you with a tenderness that made it difficult to feel anything but a comforting warmth.

You stared at him, trying to find some form of deceit in his eyes, some hint that he was just messing with you, but all you saw was his admiration and care for you.

Another sob rolled through you and you wrapped your arms back around him. He held you like that for a while, and slowly the tears lessened and you calmed down a bit.

You pulled away from him and looked around the room, realizing where you were and thought to yourself how silly it all was. You were in a dance room, just sleeping on the couch all night as Baekhyun stayed and made sure you were alright. Every other time you’d been in here with him, your ass was on his lap grinding on him.

“Do you want a dance or anything?”

Baekhyun just laughed, “Don’t worry about me, I’m just as happy doing this. As long as I get to spend time with you.”

“Okay.” You said, but you made yourself comfortable on his lap anyway, legs stretched across the couch. You wrapped your arms around him again, and rested your head on his shoulder. He put an arm around your waist and you just sat like that for a while, enjoying each other’s embrace.

He hadn’t been lying, he’d take this over a lap dance any day. To have your arms around him like this, not because he paid you, but because you wanted to, for him nothing could beat that. The skin of your waist felt so soft beneath his palms, he thought he must be dreaming.

The sober part of you wanted to scream at you to get up. But when Baekhyun’s hands felt so warm and comforting on you, the drunken haze took over and you just basked in the feeling. In the back of your mind you knew you’d regret tonight’s events later, but now it felt too good to ignore. With your head resting on his shoulder and the sound of his heartbeat in your ear, you just felt right. Like this was where you were supposed to be. 

“Do you want me to take you home soon? I don’t think you should be driving yourself tonight.” Baekhyun asked, and your lips pulled into a pout. 

“Can we stay like this a little longer.” You lifted your head to look at him, and when you made eye contact, Baekhyun couldn’t help but grin. 

“Of course sweetheart, if that’s what you want.” 

Your heart skipped a beat at the pet name. That was the first time Baekhyun had called you anything like that before. He usually just called you by your name (or in the past, your stripper name). You didn’t mind, but you couldn’t help but find the word heart fluttering nonetheless. You laid your head back on his shoulder, and watched as he slowly ran his hand up and down your thigh. 

“You have such pretty hands.” You told him, reaching for the hand on your thigh. He didn’t respond, only laced his hands into yours, rubbing the back with his thumb. You kept silencing the voice in the back of your mind that was screaming at you to get up, to push Baekhyun away. But when his presence was this sweet and comforting you just couldn’t bring yourself to do so. 

“Everything about you is pretty.” Your face burned red at his words. “So, so beautiful.”  

“You’re pretty cute too.” The alcohol did a good job of bringing the words out of you that you’d usually know better than to say out loud. 

Much to your dismay, Baekhyun moved you off his lap and got up, putting his hand out for you to stand up as well. 

“Let’s get you back home, it’s late and you’re still drunk.” At first you pouted again, but you eventually agreed. You grabbed his hand and got your shoes back on, following him back down the stairs. Your manager saw and gave you a strange look, but you ignored it. You went back to the dressing room to change and met Baekhyun again in the parking lot. Being seen leaving with customers looked bad, and after being upstairs for hours with him you didn’t want to raise any more suspicions. 

 You spotted him leaning against a black Audi, and you let him open the door for you and got in. You told him your address and he pulled out of the lot. For most of the car ride home you were silent. You still felt bad that Baekhyun had come to see you just for all of this to happen, and now he was having to drive you home too since you had gotten too wasted.

“I’m sorry, for everything. You just wanted a fun couple of hours and you got stuck babysitting my drunk ass.” 

“You know I don’t mind, I’m just glad you’re safe now.” He said as he was pulling up to your place. He parked, but looked over to you before getting out. “Can I give you my number? You don’t need to use it if you don’t want to, but I just want you to have it so you can call me if you’re in trouble again.” 

You looked him in the eyes again, looking for some sort of ulterior motives, but found them filled with nothing but care and warmth. “Okay.”

He looked surprised, but you just handed him your phone and let him put in his number. 

“I don’t want you to think you have to text me or call me or anything, I just feel better knowing you can contact me if you need someone.” 

You smiled. “I know.” 

Baekhyun got out to open the door for you, and when you stepped out you found yourself wrapping your arms around him again tightly.  “Thank you. Seriously, I don’t even wanna think about what could’ve happened tonight if it weren’t for you.” 

“You don’t have to keep thanking me, it’s no big deal. You know I’m happy as long as I’m with you.” 

You didn’t want to let go. The feeling of your head resting against his broad chest and his arms around you felt too sweet, too good to be true.

He’s the one who breaks away first. You could see his eyes scan your face, spending especially long on your lips. Your face heated up as you noticed the proximity between the two of you. 

“I, um.. I should get inside. Thanks for the ride.” You said, grabbing your bag  and quickly walking to the door. Baekhyun waved you goodbye and waited until you were inside to get back in his car and drive himself home. 

You almost immediately threw yourself into bed and passed out, but Baekhyun couldn’t stop thinking about your words and actions from earlier. The way you clung onto him as you cried, how happy you seemed to be sitting on his lap cuddled up to him, how you’d called him cute. His mind raced with the possibility of you maybe, possibly, being able to like him the way he liked you. He told himself it was just the alcohol, that you would never have acted like that sober. 

But he couldn’t help hoping he was wrong. 

As the night went on he only found himself falling deeper and deeper into thought. With nothing but the darkness of his bedroom to keep him company, he felt hyper aware of the emptiness around him. 

Baekhyun hated sleeping alone already, and with the thoughts of your sweet words and actions running rampant in his mind, it felt impossible. How was he supposed to relax when you had just called him cute? The night drew on and on, but Baekhyun didn’t sleep. Not when the feeling of your hands around his body was still so fresh in his mind. 

He was so close to what he yearned for more than anything, yet still so far. 

Next Chapter

[crimsonbluemoon]

Kihorri’s Birthday Present: Daithi De Wildcat

OKAY SO FIRST OF ALL

Happy birthday @kihoori !!!! You are the best Owlbun ever and I’m so happy to have you in my life! And since you drew me pictures that made me cry for my birthday, I wrote you a little drabble to get back at you. Won’t make you cry, but it’s a storyline you wanted me to write so I figured I’d spoil it to you and give it to you. 

So again, happy birthday, and please enjoy! ^.^ 

Kihorri’s Birthday Present

Wildcat hadn’t wanted to know his ‘perfect match’. He was in the competition, yeah, but that was because he needed money. Marcel had urged him to enter the competition on a whim; they were looking for single people in the area, and Tyler definitely fit that part (Marcel’s word’s, not his own, and he’d shown his appreciation by throwing a gatorade at his head). Wildcat hadn’t expected a call back, nevermind an actual place on the show. He’d taken the chance, because it was free money and he wasn’t an idiot. So he had to go on weird dates and let a computer calculate his compatibility with a bunch of guys. He could handle that. A plan was formed; he’d come in, watch guys make complete fools of themselves, and then he’d get the cash money at the end. Maybe even get some entertainment out of it. 

But when he actually fell in love? Yeah, that wasn’t a part of the plan.

“It’s just a date, Tyler.” Vanoss rolled his eyes and leaned back on the couch, which was far too large for just the two of them to share. The living room held all twelve men on the show easily, but most of the other contestants were busy getting drunk or falling in love. While Scotty and Marcel (the first perfect match to be discovered by the group) made out in the kitchen over dinner, Smiity, Craig, and Ohm joked around a game of poker and shots. Wildcat was sure the others were scattered all over the home, but it wasn’t any of the people in the house that was causing his pissed off mood. 

“Why the fuck did your boyfriend choose Nogla and Moo for the date? Delirious is a fucking idiot, but even this is beyond his stupidity.” Vanoss flushed and kicked the side of his thigh before slumping back on the couch’s armrest. His hands shoved into the front of the sweatshirt, Evan burying his chin and scowl under the collar of the hoodie. Wildcat knew that technically, Jon and Vanoss hadn’t been paired up yet by Panda’s ‘Computer of truth’, but everyone had all but given up on trying to match with either of them. Vanoss was hopeless, Delirious oblivious, and Wildcat wanted to smash their faces together or drown them (depending on how close he was to the pool at that given moment). Some of the couples in the house were dumb, but these two were hopeless. 

“He was put on the spot after he won the challenge; you know Del’s mind ain’t good with quick decisions.” Vanoss defended Delirious, because of course he did. Wildcat made his feelings about the reply known by a snort and a roll of his eyes.

“Moo’s got a better chance finding water in the desert than matching Nogla.” 

“You know you keep doing that, right?” Vanoss’s tone changed, and Wildcat arched an eyebrow to dare him to continue. Surprisingly, Evan did, even if he sunk lower on the couch and sigh. “Any time any of us put Nogla on a date, you say they won’t match.” 

“What? No I don’t.” The loud groan that came out from Vanoss proved that he felt Tyler’s answer was dumb. 

“First time, we sent him out with Lui.”

“Have you seen the height difference? And the chaos is too imbalanced, neither keeps the grounded side of their stupid relationship-”

“Which is probably why the computer said they weren’t a match, and we moved on to Nogla and Brian-”

“Why, because they both speak like dumbasses? Neither one of them has a grip on reality, and they’d be spending their money in Las Vegas before the first date ended. I knew before they even got scanned they weren’t gonna be a match.” His critical assessment got a droll stare from Vanoss, who kept his judgement quiet because of the pizza slice he’d stuffed into his mouth. “Wait, when did you get-”

“And now-” Evan cut in, the cheese and dough muffling the voice. “We picked Moo. Who is well grounded, mature, will help Nogla’s impulsive nature.”

“Brock’s softer than a sneaker full of shit; he’s too kind for him to keep a steady leash on Nogla’s chaotic energy. I’m telling you, Moo is Terroriser’s match and y’all are gonna send Brian to jail for murdering the next guy who takes Brock out.” Tyler hated how little their group gave him credit for his intuition. He wasn’t buying the algorithms and stupid shit their host, Panda, had explained on the first episode. But he could pick up on human nature; Brock and Brian’s chemistry was soft, but powerful, except both men were just too hesitant to get rejected by the other to suggest they go on a date. Plus, they were already on two strikes each; one more strike and they’d be sent home without finding their Mr. Right. 

“I think Brian’s waiting to win one of the competitions so he can ask Brock.” It was cute, in a dumb kind of way, that Brian wanted to earn his date with Brock. Wildcat could respect that, in a way. He’d only been on one awkward date with Ohm the first week, which he was sure Smiity chose just to get Tyler back for eating his cheerios. Since then, Wildcat had glared at anyone who even looked his way during the ‘date decision’ part of the show, and his name had been kept off the chopping block. 

“Is that why Brian asked your soul-dork to a boxing match? To beat the shit out of the guy who beat him out of sheer luck and sent his lover away for the night?” Because Delirious should not have won their challenge that afternoon; since when did Delirious read? Did he even know how to? He couldn’t figure out the word ‘mountain’ on a good day. Yet he’d aced the trivia quiz about literature, stealing the last three points of the competition out of Brian’s hands when knowing the two men who were sent to kill Hamlet were named Rosencrantz and Guildenstern (even Brock hadn’t know that, and he’s the nerd of all nerds). Vanoss had looked impressed, Terroriser pissed, and Wildcat just wanted to yell at Nogla for not knowing who wrote Harry Potter.   

“You know,” Vanoss drawled out slowly, tip-toeing around a subject that Wildcat wasn’t aware of. “Remember how we got split into two teams week three for our date challenge?” 

“Yeah, I got stuck with the fucking idiots.” He’d lost, because Scotty couldn’t figure out how to change oil for the car they’d had to tune up for the competition. Where Panda and the producers of the show got the stupid ideas of the challenges, Tyler didn’t want to know. 

“Panda spun the wheel for the first half of the date, which landed on Nogla. So we had to choose the other person.”

“I was literally right there, why are you-

“Lui wasn’t the group’s first date choice for Nogla.” Vanoss’s words pushed Wildcat away from the back of the couch, fighting with himself for only a moment before he caved.

“Then why the fuck did you pick him?” Wildcat snapped out, crossing his arms over his chest. Evan took time stretching his arms over his head, before letting them dangle over the armrest his head rested against. 

“Why is this my job?” Vanoss gripped into the air, but didn’t give Wildcat time to ask what he meant. “We had to choose Lui because the guy he’s meant to be with had made it quite clear he’s not going on another date.”

“You’re saying… wait.” Dumbfounded, Wildcat sat without words to reply with. Vanoss gave him a few seconds to try and rebuild his brain, then finally pushed to sit cross-legged on the sofa.

“We’re on week six, and you haven’t even stopped to think of why you hate Nogla being on dates with people?” 

“Because he’s an idiot,” Wildcat answered, uneasy when Vanoss shrugged his shoulders and smiled.  

“Or maybe cause he’s your idiot?” 

“Wh-what the fuck? Are you stupid? Why would he ever be-” 

“Nogla’s on two strikes, too.” The words stalled Tyler’s brain, Vanoss leaning to the side to snag another piece of pizza from the box he’d hidden under the table. “If we test him with Brock, and it’s wrong-”

“It will be wrong.”

“-then he’s gone.” Evan folded the pizza together, but kept his eyes focused on Wildcat. “You okay with that?” 

“Course I’m not!” His words came out before he could stop them, and Vanoss nodded like he already knew the answer.

“Wonder why that is.” Both men sat in the silence for different reasons. Evan because his mouth was full of pizza, and Tyler because the bottom was dropping out of his stomach. He couldn’t accept this. Sure, he knew there was a chance, because statistics and algorithms and all of that bullshit. But he’d thought he’d end up with someone softer. Someone who didn’t drive Tyler up the wall with his idiotic nature and weird laugh, his love of dogs and his kind smile whenever he was proud of one of the other guys. Not one who was optimistic about everything in life, made Wildcat’s ragged edges a little smoother, made him wanna just roll his eyes and laugh at all the random thoughts he spouted out at the weirdest time. But he was cute when he got angry at Tyler’s insults and the blush brightened his eyes if he was too tired-

“Oh.” Horror crashed through him, Wildcat slowly rising to his feet. “Oh no.” 

“Yup.” Vanoss didn’t even give him the dignity of looking up from his pizza when he finalized Tyler’s mental breakdown. 

“Fuck that.” Then Wildcat was gone, his panic pushing him down the stairs of the house. He could hear the cameraman chasing him, trying to keep track of his movements. But Tyler just didn’t care; he needed out of the house. 

“Wildcat?” Panda’s voice caught his ear when he pushed out the front door, feet feeling the wet grass because he’d left his shoes in the house. 

“Nope.”

“Where are you going?”

“Away.”

“You can’t just leave! Get back here.” The sound of Anthony moving after him made him walk faster, refusing to let his anxiety or feelings catch up with him.

“Nononononono-” Tyler shouted when he was tackled to the ground, his mouth filled with dirt and grass in seconds. He spit it out and flailed his body, trying to buck Panda off his back. But the host held strong as they rolled, garbled shouts and insults thrown back and forth between them. Panda’s elbow met his eye, while his own palm rocked the side of Anthony’s nose. They fought like school kids, Wildcat desperate to get away from the show and Panda refusing to let him budge. In the distance he could hear cheering from his castmates, and he knew Kryoz well enough to assume he was taking bets. If Vanoss didn’t bet on him, he swore to god-

“Woah, woah!” Moo’s voice caught Tyler’s ear, jerking his head up from the grass Panda was pushing it into to look at the new voice. Not because he wanted to see Brock, but because Wildcat knew who he was with. 

“Is that Panda? Is the host supposed to fight the contestants?” Nogla glanced between Anthony and Tyler, eyes round with curiosity and excitement. “Is Tyler winning?” 

“O-obviously,” Wildcat answered, despite his cheek fully planted into the ground. But he couldn’t really care at the moment; his heart was too busy trying to leap out of his chest to focus. Like a freight train, his emotions finally caught up with his body. Seeing Nogla after Vanoss’s revelation made Tyler realize the idiot wasn’t lying; the tension that’d spun around his spine from the moment Nogla and Moo left on their date finally unraveled. Panda bearing down on his back didn’t affect his breathing anymore; he was able to breathe smooth and easy. The pulse in his neck was going wild, and he’d never felt the desire to kiss and punch someone at the same time so badly.  

“Come on, up you go.” Brock helped pull Anthony up with a laugh, finally allowing Wildcat to push up into a seated position. It was second nature to cross his arms and glare at Panda, who showed his maturity by sticking out his tongue. But he looked proud of himself turning to chit chat with the filming the crew, because he had completed his mission. Wildcat was still at the house, stuck with his feelings and emotions and Nogla-

“Aw, jeeze, Tyler. Look at you, buddy.” Nogla’s goofy grin when he crouched down and rubbed his rough palm against Wildcat’s dirty cheek was overwhelming, Tyler frozen in his spot at the touch. Heat rushed his face, fingers twitching in the grass from the urge to touch the beanstalk gazing down at him in obvious amusement. “You’re a mess.” 

“Well whose fault is that?” Tyler snapped out, sure his cheek would burn off Nogla’s skin from the heat. Dumb as always, Nogla gave a owlish blink, tilting his head to the side curiously. 

“Eh? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you’re my match, you idiot!” His mouth really needed to learn to take a fucking break. His chest heaved from the shout, hating how many eyes and cameras and lights were on them. He wanted to curse himself for making Nogla’s mouth drop open in surprise, proving he hadn’t a clue about their potential match. Which meant the idiot didn’t even see Tyler as a possibility, which was just a kick in the dick-

“Are ya making fun of me because I like you?” The question derailed Wildcat’s thoughts, and he stared at the slight pout that Nogla now wore. “Cause I already told the guys ye wouldn’t want a guy like me, so if this is some sorta bet or something…”

“Since when have you liked me? You never told me shit.” Tyler asked, and Nogla sighed with more annoyance than he should ever be allowed.

“Ya, obviously. Why would I wanna get rejected by my match?”

“Wait, you knew?” 

“Yup! First week, it was kind of obvious. I got all these butterflies looking at you, but nobody else. You’re weird and rude, and I like how funny you are when you make fun of the others.” Nogla scratched his temple with his free hand, the other still holding Wildcat’s face. “Don’t like it much when you do it to me, but I think that’s how you flirt so it’s okay cause you do it alot! Made me feel pretty special.”

“Jesus, what is my life?” Tyler’s shoulders deflated, but even with his irritation, he felt his heart lighten. Trying to cover his hint of a smile when noticing the cameras still watching them, Tyler huffed, rolling his eyes. “We’re going into the scan tonight; if we’re a match, the next date is ours.” 

“Fuck the rest of us, right?” Brian’s shout from the balcony of the house had the rest of the castmates laughing, and Tyler flipped him off long enough that he knew the editors were going to hate him. 

“Yeah! Let’s go on a date.” But when Nogla laughed and dived forward to tackle Tyler (despite Wildcat shouting in protest) onto the grass in a hug, Wildcat forgot the rest of the house. The show, the money, getting revenge of Panda- none of it mattered. 

Wildcat hadn’t wanted to find his match, but maybe he was okay that he did. 

And there ya go! Thank you very much, let me know what you think, and go say happy birthday to Kihorri! <3

[whitewallwhispers]

Little Lies

Narcos - Javier Peña - Series

Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight - Part Nine

A young writer moves to Colombia to perform research on the drug war for her latest novel. She’s willing to do anything for information, which leads her down a rabbit hole that begins to blur the line between pretending to be someone and becoming something she might not be ready for.

Her latest target is a D.E.A. Agent named Javier Peña. And things are getting complicated.

Warnings: Drug use (cocaine), alcohol use (wine), strong language (pretty much every expletive under the sun), smut - mentions of oral sex (male receiving), rough sex (mentions of hair pulling, choking), unprotected sex (wrap it up, folks), daddy kink

My hope is that you can imagine this character as any race with any style of hair (as someone with short hair I get annoyed when every fic mentions long locks and ponytails).

This is kind of a dumb note but I feel the need to clarify that this smut is completely aimed at Peña - I love Pedro but in a completely different, non-sexual way. It’s a credit to his acting skills that he can make me want to fuck nearly every character he plays when IRL I just want to be his best friend.

He certainly left bruises. On her hips, her wrists. Purple at first before fading to yellow in the week that had passed since she last saw him. She’d gone to the bar every night, drinking away her parents’ money in the faint hope he’d show.

He didn’t.

She tried not to take it personally. She tried not to think about the possibility that he’d gone back to his regulars and forgotten all about her.

Maybe that’s why she’d decided to blow through an entire packet of coke, railing line after line off her counter as she wrote, though it wasn’t long before she was running into a dead end of ideas. If Peña had given up on her, she’d have to find another cartel member soon to give her more information. If she couldn’t gain the perspective of the opposite side, she might as well gain more insight into the one she already knew.

Her high made her forget that the next packet of her supply still laid on her bedside table. It didn’t help that she’d gone for the bottle of white wine she had in her fridge, drinking deeply straight from it as she moved to turn on her stereo, dancing to herself to Billie Holiday as she took another pull, her lips numb and limbs buzzing.

Maybe I should call it a night on writing. She’d been stuck for the past hour and even the coke had failed to stimulate her further. Maybe she could drown out the strange strain in her chest with the next packet she had. Maybe the wine would give her a hangover, and she’d spend the whole day tomorrow thinking only about how miserable she felt instead of wondering what Peña was doing and if she’d ever see him again.

Thirty minutes further into dancing by herself she’d drank nearly half the bottle of wine and taken another line from her fresh pouch.

She was being irresponsible.

She thought there wouldn’t be consequences.

She wasn’t thinking straight.

So when there came a knock at her door, she opened it straight away without peeking through the chain to see who it was.

Fuck fuck fuck.

She now had her door wide open to Peña, who was giving her an apologetic look.

“I know I said I wouldn’t turn up unannounced next time, but you wouldn’t believe what a week it’s been.”

Before she could even think he was stepping into her apartment.

“Wait,” she choked. “Hold on.”

But by the time she’d thought to stop him, he was already in the door. He could already see what she was about to do. He’d see her hiding the coke and he’d know and he’d hate her and she’d lose her only chance at writing about both sides of the story. He saw her panic.

“What’s the matter?” his voice was full of concern, too sweet in contrast to the severity of the situation.

“Can you close your eyes? Please? I know it sounds weird, but…”

“I - uh - sure, I guess,” he answered, mercifully shutting them without question.

She reached behind her to the counter to put down her wine and grab her manuscript before sprinting to her bedside table, stuffing the baggie of coke on top of the papers and shutting them safely away in the drawer.

“Okay, you can open them now,” she said, returning in front of him.

He was on her immediately, lips hot and heavy as he pushed her further into the room. It unfolded much like last time. He forced her onto her knees. This time she did a better job of relaxing her throat, and as such he thrusted into her harder than before. She didn’t gag once, and he rewarded her by eating her out before he began to pummel her into the bed in every position imaginable. There were no handcuffs this time, but plenty of hair pulling and insistence on calling him daddy and choking.

He came inside her again, and this time she made sure she got up to go to the bathroom first. He required no cleanup. That should automatically grant her first dibs.

But it was a mistake. After she’d taken care of everything she washed her hands and opened the door, only to find Javier standing there, jeans on but shirtless, his gun held lazily in his hand that rested against the wall as the other held up his badge.

“You wanna know what this means, sweetheart?” His voice was calm and even, but his eyes were dark.

Fuck. Had he looked when he said he’d close his eyes? Had she forgotten to hide something? Or please, for the love of God let this be some weird sort of kinky roleplay bullshit. He took a step towards her and she fought the urge to take a step back. It’d look too suspicious. Instead she tried to play dumb.

“Hmm…American Beurau of Fuckall?” she asked coyly.

“Wrong letters.”

“Unless you’ve been studying up on the Berlin Wall I don’t think you get to quiz me about anything.” She rolled her eyes and turned back to the mirror, frantically looking for something to do with her hands. Lipstick. Bingo. She pulled open her makeup drawer and grabbed the first tube she found before hurriedly applying it. She prayed he couldn’t see the way her hand was shaking.

Javier stepped fully into the bathroom now, standing directly behind her, his arm holding the gun wrapping around her waist while the other returned his badge to his back pocket. He pushed her forward until she was stuck between him and the counter.

“That thing better not be loaded,” she joked, “and your gun better be empty too.” She finished with her lips and began to toy with her hair instead, avoiding his eyes in the mirror.

“What’s this?” he asked, bending so his mouth pressed close to her ear, dangling something small in front of her.

“What does it look like?” she said with a shrug. Holy fuck. It was a baggie of coke. Her coke. She couldn’t tell if she’d left it out or he’d gone looking for it and honestly it didn’t matter right now. The only thing she needed to focus on was sounding as oblivious as possible. “If you want some go ahead, I don’t mind.”

His grip on her tightened painfully, the cold metal of his gun biting into her bare skin.

“Where’d you get it?”

“A friend.”

“What kind of friend?”

“The same kind you are.”

His arm loosened its hold on her slightly, but she was still pinned between him and the sink.

“Do you know who your friend works for?”

“I mean, he’s never said, but given he pays me half in coke I think you and I can wager a guess.”

Javier nodded.

“How often do you see this friend?”

“Not often.” A lie. She’d only seen him once. But he made sure she knew where to find him again.

“Are you friends with anyone else he works with?”

She shook her head.

“Could you be?”

“Why?” she laughed. “Bored of me already? Worried I’ll go broke when you stop calling?”

“I’m D.E.A.”

She blinked. “Yeah, I still don’t know what that means.” Oh, yes I do.

“Drug Enforcement Administration.”

Time to play it up.

“Oh shit, Javi, listen, I can explain,” she stammered. “Please, don’t -”

“Don’t worry, you’re not in trouble,” he reassured her, placing the baggie on the counter and stroking her cheek. “Not unless you refuse my offer.”

“Offer?”

Okay, now she was lost.

“See your friend more often. See his friends. See his friends who are more powerful than he is. And I’ll keep seeing you, and if you tell me where they are or what they say or anything useful about what they’re doing, I’ll pay double.”

She gulped. On the one hand, she’d already been considering seeing cartel members more frequently for info. On the other, she wasn’t sure if she was prepared to really commit to being a prostitute. It wouldn’t be pretend anymore. Instead of a writer playing at being a whore, she’d be a whore who was writing a novel.

“You…you won’t get in trouble for sleeping with someone who does coke?” she whimpered, trying to still sound scared of him while inside she was really just scared shitless of herself and the mess she’d gotten into.

“What, you think you’re the only whore in Medellin who partakes? You think you’re the only one I see?”

She bit her lip. Why the fuck did that hurt?

“Right,” she nodded, suddenly unable to look him in the eyes.

“You’re so naive,” he sighed. He placed his gun on the counter and returned his hand to her hip, thumb brushing over the bone with the same intensity as when they fucked. His lips found her neck and they began to press feverishly against her skin, gently biting her between every kiss.

His free hand reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet, briefly letting go of her long enough to pull out a stack of bills and toss it next to his gun.

“The only info I have on him is old, probably useless to you now,” she stammered.

“That’s not what it’s for.” After shoving his wallet back into his jeans he gripped her waist and pushed his body so tightly against her back that her hips ground painfully into the sink. She gasped at the way it hurt, but it only made him groan into the crook of her neck, biting her harder now.

“J-Javi,” she breathed, not knowing which pain to focus on.

“Why do I want you so much?”

She blinked in surprise. His voice sounded so vulnerable. Raw and honest.

“I know I just told you to, but…I think about you fucking someone else and I can’t help but feel jealous.” His hands tugged down her panties and she could feel his growing erection pressing into her lower back.

What the fuck was she supposed to say to that?

Especially since she felt the same way.

Come on, think of something clever.

She couldn’t, her mind was completely scrambled between the way her hips were embedded against the cold porcelain, the way his lips were trailing across her collarbones and shoulder, the way his hands were pulling out his cock and pushing it between her legs.

His hand came to her other shoulder and bent her forward, her reflection flying towards her as she leaned closer to the mirror. She looked at him in the glass, noting the way his eyes were heavily lidded and mouth was hanging open slightly as he breathed heavily.

“I find myself daydreaming about being inside you all the time. It’s so fucking distracting,” he huffed, sliding into her and meeting her eyes in the mirror. She braced herself against the sink, crying out gently as her hips were pushed further into the counter. He pumped in and out of her slowly, keeping his eyes locked on hers.

“See how pretty you look when I fuck you?”

“Javi,” was the only response she could think of. Think of? There hadn’t been any thought in it, it slipped out of her as she threw her head back. He felt so good, and hurt so much. Not just the way he trapped her against the sink, but the way she wanted him.

She’d gotten attached.

She really was too naive, too inexperienced, too out of her depth.

Childish, almost, in the way she let herself develop feelings for him just because he was the first man to make her orgasm, the first man she dreamed about when he wasn’t there, the first man to make her feel desirable. She felt so silly, so ashamed of how she’d lost her professional objectivity.

She was so lost in thought she didn’t notice the tears that welled in her eyes. It wasn’t until one slipped down her cheek that she realized she was crying. Javier pulled out of her immediately, turning her around to face him.

“Am I being too rough?” he asked, eyes searching hers.

“No,” she shook her head, her voice pathetically weak. “Go harder.” Maybe the physical pain would drown out the embarrassment and confusion currently filling her mind.

“I won’t if you’re crying.”

“Please just do it. I’ll use our safe word if it’s too much.”

His eyes surveyed her dubiously for a moment before he turned her back around, pushing her against the counter once more and bending her forward. His hands found her waist as he began to thrust into her again, grunting as she tensed around him.

She watched his face in the mirror, a few more tears spilling out her eyes before they stopped as she steadied herself. Focus on the physical, she thought. She closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip so hard she was sure she’d break the skin. Her hips would be bruised again, much worse this time, but she began to relish in the way her bones ground against the sink.

He picked up his pace, slamming into her with stuttering breaths.

“No one feels as good as you,” he whispered.

“Don’t.” She hadn’t meant to say it. But it came out of her mouth anyway.

He froze inside her.

“Don’t what?” he sounded concerned again. Sweet.

Stop it.

“Don’t be nice to me. Don’t say nice things to me. Just fuck me and go.”

“I - are you sure you’re okay?”

Oh, great. She could feel herself getting choked up again. “Javi, just do what you’re paying me for.”

He sighed heavily and pulled out of her. “Fine. But not like this.” He pulled her up and shut the bathroom door, pushing her back up against it and kissing her gently, his fingertips softly brushing over her cheeks and neck. His hands trailed lower, sliding around her to undo her bra, pulling it off of her carefully and placing it on the counter beside his gun. His thumbs circled her nipples as he brought his lips back to hers, tongue hesitantly slipping into her mouth.

“You made your lip bleed,” he said, pulling back and looking at her with furrowed brows.

“Good.” Her voice was flat. The way he was treating her so softly was making everything worse.

“What’s going on?”

Frustrated, she grabbed his wrist and thrust his hand against her throat. “Please stop being like this. I want you to hurt me.”

His fingers flexed weakly against her neck, but still, he didn’t let go. “You’re acting different. Something’s off.”

“I don’t wanna talk about it. Just fuck me.”

“Look, you don’t have to be an informant for me if you don’t want to, I won’t get you in trouble, just -”

She went on her tiptoes and kissed him as hard as she could, her hand wrapping around and stroking his length.

“I’ll do whatever you want if you just finish this the way you started,” she breathed. “Please.”

Her touch seemed to bring his base instincts back into control, because his fingers began to tighten around her throat while his other hand hooked under her knee and pulled her leg up, pushing it beside her chest and testing the limits of her flexibility.

It burned. He held her leg in place so firmly she could feel the muscles straining as if they were ready to snap. As both his hands were occupied it was up to her to guide him into her center, but once he was inside her she let her hands brace herself against the door.

Their height difference made things a little awkward until he finally released her throat and scooped her other leg up, lifting and holding her against the door with his body as he thrust into her again and again. Her hands came to his shoulders, gripping them to feel the way the muscles were pulled taut with her weight.

He buried his face in her neck, panting against her hot skin.

There was no pain now, only pleasure, and it was almost too much to bear. He felt so good against her, inside her. She ran her fingers through his hair and breathed in the smell of sweat and sex and faded cologne that encompassed him.

She didn’t want to cum. But she did anyway, biting her lip again to keep herself from saying his name. She couldn’t do it to herself. It would hurt too much  in the wrong way. In the way that came from inside.

“Good girl,” he murmured as she pulsed around him, legs shivering.

She hung her head back against the door, closing her eyes and trying to numb herself to his touch. It sounded like he’d finish soon and then he would leave and then she would never see him again.

She wouldn’t allow herself to.

Fuck it. Her book would only take place from the cartel’s perspective.

It wasn’t worth getting her heart broken over.

Because the money on the counter beside her bra and his gun was all she meant to him, all she’d ever be worth to him. And if she fucked him one more time it might kill her.

He came inside her, groaning as he held her against the door one long moment before gently bringing her down. As soon as her feet the floor she was picking up her clothes and the money, pushing through the door without looking at him. She rushed to get dressed before he could follow her, but she only got as far as her bra and panties and shirt before she heard his footsteps coming out of the bathroom.

“Cigarette?” he asked, walking past her and picking up his own shirt off the ground. He turned to study her while he buttoned it, but she didn’t look at him. Couldn’t.

“No,” came her blunt reply. She debated putting on her shorts but the minute he was gone she’d be under her covers feeling like shit, so she decided it wasn’t worth it. Instead she stood awkwardly against the back of the couch, arms crossed, looking everywhere in the room but at him. When she heard him light himself a cig she thought she should polish off the last of her wine.

Not wanting to risk walking near him in her suddenly unbearably small apartment, she decided to forgo actually stepping into the kitchen to get it and instead leaned over the counter from as far away as possible to grab it, her hips aching in protest as she did so. She took a deep swig before moving to go back to her perch on the couch, but when she turned she found herself nearly running right into his half-exposed chest.

“Why won’t you look at me?” he asked quietly.

Defiant, she met his gaze and was taken aback by how sad he looked.

Goddammit.

All she wanted to do was kiss away his frown and push back the messy hair from his face.

“Don’t show up unannounced next time,” was her only response.

Something flickered across his face so quickly she didn’t get the chance to recognize it before it was gone.

“Meet you at the bar, then?”

“Sure,” she nodded before pushing past him, resting on the back of the couch and taking another draw.

She’d never go to that bar again.

[amelink66world]

Love of my Life

Hey guys!! This is the fifth part of the series. For those o you who don't know, this story is available on my wattpad too. I go by the name @Vanshikaaaa12 so you can check it out there too if it's more convenient. Enjoy!

New York ( part- 2 )

To say that I was surprised to see her would be an understatement. God had a funny business with her. A million things are running through my mind. I never told her I got divorced, or that I had a brain tumor or a foster kid or that I operated on Catherine Fox or... What do I now?

" AMY!! Oh my God. Amy! " Nancy leans in for a hug which Amelia begrudgingly returns. " Nancy!!", she smiles tightly.

" Amy what are you doing here?", shock evident on her face having to come face-to-face with her youngest sibling after many many years. She then noticed the very very handsome man standing confusedly next to Amelia. Feeling rude to have ignored him, she quickly introduced herself and shook his hand ," Hi. I'm Nancy Shepherd. Amelia's sister. " She assumed the man must be Owen, Amelia's husband she briefly told them about, seeing how close the couple was standing together. " And you must be Owen? "

Link suddenly felt Amelia loop her hand around his arm. He found it quite odd since the 'rules' strictly prohibited them from any form of PDA, not that he was complaining. He was shocked for a second when the woman who claimed to be Amelia's sister called him Owen but was flabbergasted by Amelia's affirmation. She froze on the spot and slowly turned his head toward her. What is she doing? Me? Owen? WHAT?

Amelia agrees, " YES!! This is my husband". Oh Link is going to kill me! Why did I have to do that? I just hope Link plays along. She signals him with her eyes when they briefly connect their eyes to play along. He quickly perceived her reaction and played along. Thank God!

" Yes! It's really nice to finally meet you Nancy. I've heard so much about you", he flashes his pearly whites. She smiles back at them.

Amelia starts, " So you work here?"

" Uh I'm covering the Chief of OB's maternity leave. Ironical right? ", she laughs at her own joke. Amelia thinks, oh don't even start talking about irony with me.  My life has been nothing but ironical. She chuckles darkly and silently. To entertain her, Amelia pretends to laugh.

" So what brings you to New York, kiddo? Everything okay?", she asks concernedly. God I hate that nickname!!

Amelia is quick to reply, " Yeah ". Link sharply turns toward her and raises his eyebrows in slight judgment. She's okay, right? How long do I need to pretend to be her ex-husband?! He keeps on staring at her making Amelia more agitated than she already is in the process. " OH. We're here to perform a surgery on a patient." Does Nancy look impressed? Wow. I MANAGED TO DO THAT? She smiles a proud smile.

" All the way from Seattle? You must be very much in demand. Maybe that is why we never hear from you", subtly taunting her. Now there it is. I should have waited there for a second. Somethings just never change!! Link is silently watching the whole interaction

She nervously replies, " Yup. I've been pretty busy since I last saw you. Eh. I operated on Catherine Fox herself. You might'veread about it. " She turns towards Link to gauge his reaction. He smiles down st her proudly making her grin. I'm glad he approves. Nancy is a whole different story though. She just nods along showing no reaction. Link interrupts,playing along , " Also got married!! " and smiles down at her with raised eyebrows. " Ummm yesss", she laughs and lays her head on his shoulder. Somehow it comes naturally to her. Weird.

" We should definitely catch up. Come for dinner. Both of you ". Link quizzically looks at Amelia who politely declined the offer saying they had surgery. Link too intercepts saying that Amelia had a big surgery on Seattle the next day and that they were in New York only for a day, smiling apologetically.

Nancy sighs, " Huh. At least I got to see you. Haley's comet comes around more than you do. Well, good day." She turns to leave. Amelia and Link turn towards each other with disgruntled looks. They suddenly hear her voice again and turn sharply, "Call mom sometime, kiddo. It's a kind thing to do. She really misses you " and leaves. She misses me huh. What a funny thing to say.

" Okay. Thanks for that Link." Link is pretty much speechless at this point. Amelia looks embarrassed. Link curiously asks, " What was that all about Amelia??"

" What you just witnessed was some serious family disfunction. Never told my family I got divorced ", she chuckles hurmorlessly. Link is curious but doesn't probe further. " I hope there are showers here. I really need to wash off that kiddo from my body. Blah."

Link chuckles and flirts, " Need some help with that?? "

He looks down at her with mirth in his eyes. Her eyes widen at his suggestion and she feels her cheeks burning. She sharply looks away from him trying ignore the images her mind was conjuring at his suggestion. Link shakes his head and softly laughs at her reaction. Oh this trip is going to be amazing.

They quickly change into some scrubs, in separate rooms obviously to avoid the inevitable ;) and examine the patient. They determine a treatment plan and decide to monitor the patient closely for the next twenty four hours after the surgery.

" Sooo, the surgery is scheduled in the afternoon. We'll have twenty four hours to monitor the patient. We have more than enough time on our hands. What do you wanna do today? ", Link wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at Amelia. She grins at him to give a playful comeback but before she can do it, Nancy emerges out of thin air. Is she spying on me?

" That's wonderful news. I was just going to leave y'all a note. Now you can't say no to dinner. "

Amelia is startled to say the least. She scrambles for words but none come out. She has suddenly become a dumb person. Nancy goes on, " Nope. I won't take no for an answer so don't even try otherwise I'll spring mom on you! I'll make your favourite pie. Now you have to come! "

Amelia's eyes widen at the mention of her mom. "NOO!! Don't do that. FINE. Make the pie."

" Kidding. I won't just spring mom on you like that. Meet you at 7 ", she smiles triumphantly and departs.

" Care to explain what just happened there? ", Link gives her a hard look. She cowers under his gaze.

" I hope you like pie ", she smiles apprehensively.

Amelia is trying her best to persuade Link but he fiercely refuses. They were walking down the hallway towards Jonah's room when she exclaims, "Liiinkk you can't just leave me alone like this!! They'll skin me alive! It's like...like sending Red Riding Hood to visit the wolf "

" Nope. Nuh uh. I'll be having pizza and doughnuts in the city. You're more than welcome to join me. What's even the point of going. Stay with me! "

She pouts petulantly. " Please please pweeaasee!! "

He concealed his impending grin. He had never seen her like this. She's the cutest! I can kiss her pouting mouth right here!!

" PLEASE...". She comes to a stop. " I'm begging. This is me begging." She has that flirty and teasing gleam in her eyes which she knows he can't resist. "Aren't I cute when I beg? "

Link cannot stop himself from grinning. Cute ? You're always cute. And sexy. Cute and sexy. Now how can I resist that face? She knows I can't say no to that face. Ughh she'll be te death of me!!

He waits until his heart stops racing to simply answer, " NO ". Jonah's room comes into view. Phew. Now she'll shut up for a while about me accompanying her.

Amelia kept on talking during the entirety of the surgery. She ate his ear off which he seemed to enjoy. Only when she brought up the idea of attending the dinner did he feel agitated.

" Please Link. Please ", he could make out her smile behind her surgical mask.

" The begging is cute. I agree. Don't get me wrong. But I'm not going. You shouldn't go either.  Why are you going anyway ? You don't seem too fond of your sister so what's even the point ? ", he raises one eyebrow.

" My whole family considers me a train wreck. They seriously judge me and call me the Black Sheep of the family. That's the reason I never told my famiky I got divorced. "

" What, they're mad at you cause you and Owen eloped? "

" Naah. We didn't elope. We had a big fat wedding. They just didn't come. None of my sisters or my mom came. My brother too but he gets a pass for obvious reasons. "

" That's some serious sibling rivalry. So why go to this dinner spend the evening with me in the city. I know great places here ", she shrugs.

" Well I was flown to New York to perform this rare and complicated surgery. I'm here with my husband who is shockingly handsome and ever so kind. This is a chance for me to...I don't know, brag? Prove them wrong that I'm much more capable. I'm not sure exactly ". Link feels for Amelia and that basically sealed the deal until Amelia further coaxed him into going by flirting, " I'm just sure that if you choose to go with me, I'll make it worth your while in very creative ways that you will enjoy ", her smile reaches her eyes. Link stares right back at her with dark eyes trying not to picture too much. They basically have eye sex for the rest of the surgery which was successful.

In the cab:

Amelia and Link were getting their stories straight and Amelia was telling Link about Owen's likes and dislikes. Link was actually chilled out. He even engaged in some heavy flirting with her which she very subtly ignored after getting flustered.

" Okay, last question. What colour are my eyes? " she closed her eyes and turned to face him, waiting for his answer.

Link incredulously answers, " You think they're gonna quiz me on the colour of your eyes? I believe they can't be so damn evil. "

" You don't know my family. Literally anything is possible with the Shepherds. So answer. "

He turned towards her to gaze into her face trying to picturise her face. He was a master on doing so since he had been doing that a lot lately. His favourite feature on her face were her eyes. He answered without hesitation.

" Sometimes they look blue. Sometimes they look green depending on the m...", Amelia interrupts him with " Good ". She got flustered with his correct description of her eyes. He really notices even the littlest things about me. Owen never got the colour of my eyes perfectly. Stop looking at me like that!! He's a jackass. He knows how to get me weak in the knees.

              Link is smiling at Amelia with a gleam in his and she stares back. They're list in each other's eyes until Amelia recovers quickly and turns her head. She tells him all about her family and is thankful that it's only Nancy they have to bear the whole night. Not her mom or Liz. Least of all Kathleen. God she's the worst! She described her to be like Martha Stewart but with a power to diagnose personality disorder and Amelia was always on the receiving end of that diagnosis.

They reached Nancy's mansion and were quickly ushered in. Only two minutes had passed before the doomed began to arise. Amelia sharply turned at the voice which rang in the hallways. Kathleen!!!

Amelia felt betrayed and confronted Nancy over her betrayal. She apologised quickly but showed no remorse. Kathleen managed to make Amelia uncomfortable even after so many years with a single glance. She always said the wrong things at wrong time. Who made her a psychiatrist? I seriously question man's judgement!!

          Amelia and Link's initial shock and restless gradually died down and they were having a really nice time apart from the slight jibe the sisters took at Amelia from time to time. Nancy finally served the pie and Amelia seriuosly savoured that delicacy!! Link watched her face change at sight of the pie. She really is a child! I can't take my eyes off her ! They were enjoying their pie when suddenly the bomb was dropped.

" Where's my baby giirrll??!! There was dead silence. You could hear a pin drop.

Amelia had the look of utter shock and betrayal written on her face. She looked really torn. Link was in too big a shock to think straight.

            She confronted her sisters and Nancy knew nothing about calling their mom. Kathleen was the culprit though. She obviously didn't look repentant!

Mama Shepherd came into the picture and gushed over her youngest daughter and hugged her until her gaze landed on Link. Things quickly went downhill from there. Carolyn Shepherd seemed to remember Owen from when she visited Derek in Seattle many many years ago and caught them red handed.

             The sisters then began the Shame on Amelia programme. They brought up each and every transgression of her entire life and insulted her relentlessly. It was revealed that they freaking bet on her marriage!! Who does that?! Amelia told everybody about her divorce. Soon wine was brought in Kathleen. Link reached for the wine but stopped himself thinking about Amelia. He didn't drink in solidarity and in consideration of Amelia. He knew she'd be broken after this and wanted to stay sane to take care of her.

" See this? This is why I didn't even bother to call you when I found out I had a brain tumor. This is why !! " Again, dead silence! Her family was shocked that she never told them about her brain tumor. But they didn't seem unfazed. Her mother had tears in her eyes hearing about her daughter's tumor.

Thisbpoece of information was astounding to Link! " You have a brain tumor??", he cried.

" No. Had. I had a benign grade- 1 meningioma which they completely removed!! "

Link had never felt so fiercely protective of anyone in his entire life. She is telling her about her brain tumor but no one cares ?! Is this really her family? They're pure evil !! How can someone treat their own blood like this? Don't they care about the hardships she must've endured on her road to recovery? They better shut up right now !

                 Link was having enough! They were her family ! Her blood! How could they treat her this way?ink could not bear seeing the object of his affections being insulted this way. He was getting mad !! He'd blow a gasket if Amelia didn't open her mouth soon. What has happened to her? Why isn't she defending herself? This is not the Amelia I have come to know!! Link and Amelia made brief eye contact. He willed her with his eyes to speak up. To defend her honor! Speak up, woman. Say something! Prove these bitches wrong! Show them who you are.

Amelia seems to gain some strength from his confident gaze and stood up abruptly.

Amelia's damn broke. She just blew.

" Okay you. You don't know me. You have not seen me for years. I am not that fourteen year old girl trapped in your mind anymore! I am sober. I am responsible and I'm a freaking neurosurgeon at the top of my field. I save lives everyday. In fact, I'm the Chief of Neuro at one of the top hospitals in the country. You don't get to judge me here. You have no idea who I am. So just shut the hell up!! "

Link had a proud smile on his face. Attagirl!!! That's my girl!! That's my Amelia! That's the Amelia I know and respect.

They sisters still were unfazed. Are they devils? The didn't stop their humiliations of Amelia here. In fact, they began questioning her career now!

Nothing could stop Link now!

" ENOUGH ! That's enough. I haven't known Amelia that long but I certainly know her better than you people! I've been getting to know her and she is not at all the woman you are describing. She is a brilliant surgeon. The kind you fly across the country when you need the best! ", he replied sternly but firmly. His voice grew softer when he looked at her, "She is an amazing teacher and mentor. She cares about her patients and her colleagues. I mean, she's beautiful. And smart. And kind. And funny!! And STRONG. She has overcome a lot and adversity and feels her feelings in a big way but that only makes her better than most of the people I know!! It makes her authentic! She doesn't need your misjudgment in her life."

Link walked up to her and held onto her shoulders to provide support. She gazed at him with tears in hers eyes. No one has ever stood up for me like this. He is a very good man. I'm so thankful that he came with me today. She looked up at him with adoration and gratefulness in her eyes.

            Things went further south after what he uttered next. His unintentional slip up about Leo and Betty brought a new wave of judgement and string of insults her way. She quietly looked at her mom with an unreadable expression and simply said, "Link, let's go. " She caught hold of his hand and dragged him out of the house along with her.

Mama Shepherd had never felt so disgusted by herself in her entire life. She shut up her other two daughters, gave them an earful and determined to set the record straight with her youngest daughter. She cannot leave without talking to me!

Author's Note:

I'm soooo sorry guys for the extra long chapter. I'm really trying very hard to make them shorter but these ideas in my head. Ugghh sorry. Anyways, I've kept the story as close to original as possible and just added some personal touches. Next chapter coming right up!! And I'll try to make them shorter, but you never know 😉

Your comments just make my day and motivate me further to deliver some amazing chapters. Keep commenting! Enjoy!! Until then.

[riseupimagines]

Love Mixing

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x Stark!Reader Summary: At one time Loki thought humans and Asgardians don't mix, but his opinion is tested when he meets you, tony stark's sister, a Midgardian he thinks he might be able to mix with, his feelings are tested. Especially when a Midgardian boy starts showing up around the tower wanting to mix with you. A/N: There's a lot of overprotective big brother Tony. And Thor also gets really protective. Two big brothers and s really snarky snappy Loki. Loved writing this and I hope you'll love reading it 😍😄 "Asgardians and Midgardians don't mix." Loki warned Thor. "You don't get it because you haven't been around them. I know father thinks they're inferior, but really, they're wonderful. One day you'll see." Thor said, sauntering away. Loki scoffed dismissing his brother as being ridiculous, but it wasn't long before he discovered for himself what his brother meant. After Loki's mishaps on earth his brother worked out a recuperation plan with the avengers. Loki wouldn't be put in prison, probably because no prison would be able to hold him anyways, and he'd stay with the avengers under surveillance. Everyone was doubtful of this plan-except for Thor-until one night when they came in from a mission one night and saw Loki with a young girl. She was laying on the couch. Energy drink cans, coffee cups, and work were scattered around her. She looked exhausted, with bags etched into her eyes and sleep had finally won the battle, but the most surprising thing about the scene was that the god of mischief had laid her out co,for table on the couch and was tucking her in with a blanket. He reached to carefully stroke her face when the silence was broken. "You are way too close to my sister! Back it up!" Tony yelled. Loki turned giving him a glare that startled him into stepping back. "Shhh! Stop yelling. She's trying to sleep and she hasn't slept in days. If you wake her up she'll try to drink another one of these abominations," Loki gestured to the coffee and energy drinks, "and then she'll never get the rest she needs." "She studies valiantly. Trying to undertake the knowledge of decades within a few years." Everyone looked shocked. Tony sputtered something that was almost an agreement Thor just smiled knowingly. "Are we going to talk about this?" Bucky asked later, kind of smirking. "The god of evil-" "Mischief" Thor corrected. "-has a soft spot for a college student." Bucky finished. "Not just any college student but my sister?!" Tony exclaimed. Thor just smiled. "I think Lady Y/N can be a great influence on my brother." Thor said. The other avengers nodded in agreement. "No!" Tony said. Needless to say he was outvoted on that one. And that's the one of the stories neither you or Loki knew about how you became friends. The god of mischief had taken to spending a lot of time around you. He was nicer to you than he was to anyone else and everyone, especially Thor knew he had a soft spot for you. Thor had taken to teasing him about it. "What happened to "Asgardians and Midgardians don't mix"?" Thor asked with a smirk on his face once he finally got Loki alone after his ice skating outing with you. "You were just mixing. Just now. Gliding on this ridiculous contraptions and drinking hot drinks and holding hands. That is mixing." Thor said. "No. That is you spying and being a nosy bother. I was hanging out with a friend. In fact, it was really a training exercise. She inquired about my powers and told me about a device that could help me glide on ice and I thought that I should look into it in order to expand my repertoire." Loki said. Thor just smiled and shrugged. "Fine then. You were right I guess. Asgardians and Midgardians don't mix. Maybe that's why Y/N is attempting to mix with a Midgardians right now." Smash! Thor didn't even look to see what dish Loki had smashed against the wall. He just watched his brother's eyes darken with something he could have sworn was jealousy. ***** You felt your brother's eyes burning a hole in your back and your friends curious texts burning a hole in your pocket as you escorted the muscular football player to the door. He smiled and continued flirting with you, just as he'd been flirting with you all through the lesson. When you got to the door he hugged you and swooped down for a quick kiss "for good luck". You turned your face and squirmed out of the hug. As he left you pulled your phone out and saw all the messages from your friend. How was the study date with the quarter back? Did you get a good feel of those muscles? See if y'all can make some chemistry!! You messaged her back but you couldn't muster up her same enthusiasm. When the star football player, Brad Turner, asked you to be his tutor so many girls were envious of the time you'd get to spend with the muscular quarterback that everyone was drooling over...but you couldn't muster up any attraction to him. There wasn't a sharp mind among his mass of muscle, his flirting was clumsy pick up lines and shallow compliments. His jokes fell flat on you and his green eyes see me dull and vacant compared to the blue, cunning filled eyes that you couldn't get out of your mind. "Y/N!" Tony called. You walked into the room and saw him sitting with his arms crossed on the couch. "Who was that guy you just had in here?" He asked. "Brad Turner. He's a classmate from school. I'm just helping him out." "Why?" Tony asked. "The dean said that if I tutor Brad then he'll write me a recommendation letter and secure a paid summer internship for me." You said. "Why do you need an internship? You can work at stark industries, no need to even apply." He said. "Exactly! That's not how things work. I want to get a job because of my qualifications, my work, and my accomplishments, not because of my last name or who I know." You said. "You know I can always write you a rec letter. It doesn't even have to say anything. Just slip a check insid-" Fwomp. Tony's joke was cut off as you threw a couch cushion at him and it hit him square in the face. "So the boy was here because you were tutoring him? He was drooling over you because he wanted help?" A voice in the doorway asked. You turned, surprised to see Loki standing there, arms crossed. "Yes. Im tutoring him because he needs helps passing a class." You told him. "So playing the dumb, weak fool is now a mating ploy? Darling when you're looking for a mate don't start by looking down." He said. "Mmhm. Perfectly stated." Tony said. He held up his hand to high five Loki. Loki smiled wryly as he he touched the palm of his hand then he turned on his heel and left, leaving you admiring his figure as he walked away, while wondering where this catty side of your sweet friend was coming from. ***** "Really brother? How unexpected! You don't seem to like Lady Y/N's suitor. I thought they mixed quite well together but you don't seem to appreciate him asking for her hand." Thor said. Loki scowled. "It's not her hand he wants. And it doesn't matter because he's not worthy of her fingernail clippings." Loki said storming past his brother. "But they're both Midgardians. Don't you think Midgardian and Midgardian go so well together?" Thor asked. Loki slammed his bedroom door in Thor's face. He stared at the photo strip of you and him in the city on one of the outings you'd taken him on. A week ago You'd dragged him into a photo booth and he'd tucked the photo away to later hang it on his wall. Now as he looked at the photo, you and him, he couldn't help but think that an Asgardian and Midgardian wouldn't be so bad together. ***** You sighed as you tried to explain the simple concept to Brad for the thousandth time. He just smiled at you and tried to touch you. You moved away and read the passage to him again. When you looked at him to see if he was following he was staring at your chest. "Brad!" His eyes flickered away from your chest and he turned slightly red. "Sorry." He murmured. "Brad. You are barely paying attention to what I'm supposed to be teaching you. I think you need a tutor that you find less distracting." You told him. "What you call distractions can be motivation," he smirked, leaning back to display how his muscles strained through his jersey. "How about this. You quiz me. For every question I get right you remove-" Fwomp. The sound of Brad's jersey igniting echoed through the room even though the flame was small. Squeal. Brad squealed, high pitched like a little girl, when he noticed the tiny flame. He fanned it desperately and it spread. You reached out to help him, but you didn't feel any heat. Brad jumped up from the couch screaming and dancing as he tore off the shirt and threw it to the ground. You looked at the shirt on the ground and didn't even see any smoke. HA. Ha ha ha ha ha. Loud, guffaws of laughter filled the room. You looked at the doorway and saw Thor clutching his stomach, leaning over slapping his knee, bellowing laughter. Behind him stood Loki, looking cool and regal with a hint of a haughty smile on his face. "How's that for disrobing?" He asked. Brad was panting and stomping at his shirt. "Robe? You wanna get me a robe?" "If you want someone to take off their clothes so badly why don't you start?" Loki said again giving him a haughty glare. At that moment Tony walked up. "Excuse me?! Who the hell is taking off their clothes? No one is taking off their clothes around my sister." He said. Thor stood up and crossed his arms trying to look scary. "Tony is right. You should be more respectful to Lady Y/N." Thor said. You ducked your head embarrassed by your older brother (and older brother figure). "What are you doing here Tony?" You asked him. He pushed past Thor and Loki and you saw that he had a pizza and soda in his hands. "Well I heard that my baby sister brought home a guy. That she's gonna be spending a lot of time with. So I need to check him out." Tony said. Brad stood up with his wrinkled shirt in his hands. "Sit back down. You're eating dinner with me. I need to check you out." Tony said. "Me too." Thor announced striding behind tony to sit at table. "And I guess I should confirm my notions of your inadequacy." Loki said following suit. You mentally face palmed as all three crowded around the table with you and Brad and everyone fixed their plates. "So why are you shirtless?" Tony asked. "My shirt caught on fire." Brad said. Tony's eyebrows shot up and he gave a suspicious glance to the Asgardians. Thor grinned proudly and pointed at Loki. Tony nodded and gave them a thumbs up. Loki almost smiled. "How tragic. Are you ok?" Tony asked unauthentically. "I'm great. I was freaked out but my my muscles are good. I need these muscles. Not only do they look good but they keep me on my game, keep me QB, and they keep me winning on the field and off." He said, flexing at you. "I don't know what field you're referring to but romance, to real men, is not a game." Loki said. "No. Brad is a football player. He's the quarterback. Football is a game where you're trying to get a team of men down a field to a goal while they're attacked and tackled by other men." "Oh! So it's like war?" Thor asked. "Yeah. And the QB is like the general." You said. "So what's the object of this war? Gold? A jewel?" Thor asked. "A football. It's a ball wrapped in pig skin." You said. "So you're commander of the pig army? How fitting." Loki said. Tony snorted trying to hold in a laugh. "Guys! Can y'all stop?" You said. "Ok ok. Sorry about that. Um how did you guys meet?" Tony asked. "Well I was failing a class and I have to pass the class to play in the game so my coach told me to get a tutor. Y/N's really smart and hot and like really smart so I asked if she could be my tutor. She's really smart." He rambled. "And you certainly aren't so I can see why you found that impressive." Loki said. "I mean I was smart enough to get into school. But it wasn't just that she's smart. She's hot too." He said winking at you. "Fire is hot. The sun is hot. Your clothes, should I choose to actually set the,mom fire as I'm considering doing, would be hot. Y/N is beautiful. Exquisite. Lovely. Enchanting. Radiant. She emanates beauty from the very core of who she is. She is far too beautiful for you to reduce her down to an adjective you used to describe your food. And she's much too beautiful for a cretin like you who can't even see the extent of how beautiful she is so turn your leering, disgusting eyes away from her and find somewhere else to stick your insufficient manhood and someone else to drip your disgusting hormones all over." Loki said. "Enough! This is ridiculous." You said. You stood up from the table, grabbed Brad's hand and led him out. "Brad I'm sorry about that, about them. From now on we'll do tutoring sessions at school. One hour after school I'm the library. That's it." You said. Then you walked back into the room ready to confront your silver tongued friend about just why he'd had such a problem with your friend. ***** The room was silent for a few moments after you left. Then Tony smiled and cheered and high fived Thor. "There we go! Got rid of the fuck boy. Thanks for the backup. And Loki, that was good. You scared him off for sure. Thats what happens when a guy just wants to fuck my baby sister. He's gotta be able to withstand the heat from big brother tony if he wants her." Tony said. Loki nodded, but he seemed wrapped up in his own thoughts. "She deserved better than a mere measly unintelligent mortal man." He said. "I mean, mortal is ok. That's most of her options on earth. Well I guess there's Steve but I don't know if he's necessarily immortal just old." Tony said. Loki pushed back his chair and stood up and stalked off. Thor grabbed the remaining four slices of pizza and folded them into his mouth. "They won't be coming back any time soon." Thor said. "Where's he going?" Tony asked. "To prove himself wrong." ***** You ran into Loki on your way back. "Y/N I was just looking for you." He said. "What the hell was that?" You asked him. "That was me putting an incompetent idiot in his place and making sure he keeps his dirty hands away from what's m- from what he shouldn't be touching. I know what his intentions were." Loki said. "I know what his intentions were. And I had it handled. and what do you mean what he shouldn't be touching? I'm not an object in a museum!" You said. "Exactly. You're not an object. Not a toy to be played with or a prize to be shown off or a tool to get a grade. You're a beautiful person with a beautiful heart and mind and soul. You're talented and kind and funny and...you deserve someone who at least recognizes all that you are." Loki said. "So you meant those things you said earlier? About me?" You asked. He stepped closer, "I did." "Y/N. I hope you don't think I was being cruel. I am a good person but I couldn't stand by. Not with you at stake. You deserve more than just a simple mortal man who doesn't even recognize how amazing you are and who's so inferior to you that you need to tutor him. "Since you specified...do you think there's a non mortal man who is interested and thinks I'm amazing as you say I am?" You asked, your heart racing. "Most definitely." He said, grasping your hand. You felt so giddy, but decided to mess with him as payback. You pulled your hand from his. "Great idea. I should go talk to Thor about how he feels about a Midgard-" Loki grabbed your hand and pulled you into his arms. "My brother can get his own girl. You-" he stopped and took a deep breath. He released you from his arms but pressed you against the wall, trapping you between the wall and his body. His blue eyes were boring into yours with such sincerity. "I'm sorry." He said. "Mine. That's what you've been wanting to say. You don't want Brad putting his hands on what's yours. Thor should get his girl because I'm yours. You've been trying to say it. Loki, do you want me to be yours?" You asked him. He nodded, his hands caressed your face." "Y/N. I love you. And I do want you to be mine, but not like him. I don't want you to be mine as in be my possession. I want you to be mine as in be my love, be my treasure, be my happy ever after because you make me happy. And I love you. And I will treasure you. I will be yours. Will you be mine?" He asked you, his lips hovering over yours. "Yes." He closed the gap and kissed you. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you against him your bodies molding together, fitting like puzzle pieces. He deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth. You felt intoxicated by his smell, the taste of him, his fingers left trails of fire in your skin as he traced delicate patterns up your arms and your upper back. "Oh come on! We just got rid of one of them. I don't care if you're a god you still gotta go through the process. I need to check you out and make sure you're good enough for my sister. If you can't stand the heat then you don't deserve her and you should quit now." Tony said. "Tony. No." You said pointing a threatening finger at him. Loki grabbed your hand and held it as he turned to face Tony. "I'm not going anywhere. Not when I've found someone who matches so well with me." Loki said, kissing your hand. "Don't you mean someone who mixes so well with you?" Thor said.

[kachulein]

Okie dokie fuck! So. I'm trying to decode my own brain and figure out if I have a crush on my friend. I really really wanna spend a lot of time around him, I want to be physically affectionate with him a whole lot, and. 😔 I have thought about kissing him recently. I neeeeeeeeed assistance. I also need sleep but 🤷. Do you think I have a crush on him or he is just my bestest friend?

Hello dear~ I'll try to give you some assistance but I can't guarantee whether it will be good. First and foremost, I feel like you will know best what your feelings for him actually are. Try to listen to your heart, what does it say? Does it beat faster when you're around him/thinking about him?

Being affectionate with someone can definitely be a friendship thing but now that thinking of kissing him has come into play you may be developing a crush. Do you feel like anything (emotions wise) has changed ever since you started wanting to be closer to him physically? If you can remember when it all started maybe you'll see a difference in which the friendship you previously felt towards him turned into something more than that?

And try to fantasize a little to see whether the thought of being with him makes you feel good or not. Thinking about wanting to kiss him is definitely a sign that there might be more, but try to test out the waters a bit more. Think about going on dates with him, holding hands, doing all kinds of couple-y stuff... if it feels good and you crave it? You probably have a crush on him. If it feels weird/uncomfortable, maybe not. Though, maybe it could feel weird, or maybe "wrong", since you know you've always been "just" friends but if that feeling occurs, try to feel into it and see whether you feel uncomfortable because you don't want to do any of these things with him or whether it just feels weird because "you're not supposed to have feelings for your friend" (I'm writing this in quotation marks as there's obviously nothing that forbids you from having feelings for him but I know that when friends develop feelings for one another they may feel like they could be risking their friendships due to these feelings, thus making them feel "wrong". But I hope you know, your feelings are valid and it's totally allowed to feel them🥺).

I'm not sure if this helps :(( Something (a bit silly) I used to do in the past when I had a crush on someone, I'd search up a quiz "do I love him/do I have a crush on him" or something and sometimes these quizzes, as dumb as it sounds, gave me some clarity.🤭

I hope you can take some rest and catch up on sleep!🥺 A well rested mind can see things more clearly~💞

[ponyregrets]

100 fic title songs master post part 3

is it sad that I really look forward to these? don’t answer that I don’t need further insight into how sad I am

part one / part two

And Maybe We'll Get Lucky - Modest Mouse : Ocean Breathes Salty

But He Does It So Well - Taylor Swift : Wildest Dreams

when the moon explodes or floats away - Sparklehorse : Sunshine

tsubasa wa nai kedo - Spitz : Sazanami

You Know, We Don't Stand a Chance - Belle and Sebastian : Get Me Away From Here, I’m Dying

In the Library of My House I Have a Laugh - Regina Spektor : Riot Gear

Hey You With the Pretty Face, Welcome to the Human Race - ELO - Mr. Blue Sky

The Dice Was Loaded From the Start - Dire Straits : Romeo and Juliet

And I'm Having Some Trouble Just Breathing - Jenny Owen Youngs : Fuck Was I

Nothing But Affection For All Those Who've Sailed With Me - Bob Dylan : Mississippi (these are all weird live versions I just picked one)

If You Wanna Reach Me - Christina Milian : Call Me, Beep Me

The Whole World In His Hands - idk here’s the worst possible version of what is apparently a hymn to use for this

the difference between shooting stars and satellites - Death Cab For Cutie : Passenger Seat

Just a Stranger On the Bus - Joan Osborne : What If God Was One Of Us

The Reason You Fall, The Moment You Fly - October Project : Adam and Eve

I Swear I'm Going to Bite You Hard And Taste Your Tinny Blood - The Weakerthans : Plea From a Cat Named Virtute

That Doesn't Mean We're In Love - The Magnetic Fields : Zebra

Believe Me, There's a Better Frankenstein For You To Bride - Say Hi to Your Mom : The Key of C

Oh How Happy We'll Be - Whoever sang “By the Beautiful Sea” on the Some Like It Hot soundtrack : By the Beautiful Sea

Or Are We Dancer? - The Killers : Human

Just Gotta Get Right Outta Here - Queen : Bohemian Rhapsody

It's Just That It's Delicate - Damien Rice : Delicate

you're a shining star, you'll do great in LA - Nightmare of You : I Want to Be Buried In Your Backyard

The Time It Takes to Get From Here to There - The Weakerthans : Aside

I Run a Tidy Bakery - Jenna Maroney : Muffin Top

When One Falls In, Another Can't Get Out - Nada Surf : I Like What You Say

No Surrender, No Defeat; Why Do I Still See You In Every Mirrored Window;  Help Me With This Barricade  - The Weakerthans : Pamphleteer 

All I Know Is Where You're Going - Mary Epworth : Long Gone

Look How Far We Have Come - Robert Miles : One and One

Even Though It All Went Wrong - Leonard Cohen : Hallelujah

No One Can Lift the Damn Thing - Peter Gabriel : The Book of Love (Magnetic Fields cover)

Would You Freak Out If I Said I Liked You? - Hello Saferide : The Quiz

Be a Good Guitar and You Could Go Far - The Magnetic Fields : Acoustic Guitar

this is ourselves - Queen : Under Pressure

The Bells Are Gonna Chime - My Fair Lady : Get Me to the Church On Time

and dream how wonderful your life will be - Billy Joel : Lullabye (Goodnight My Angel)

A Tunnel From My Window to Yours - Arcade Fire : Neighborhood #1 (Tunnels)

What the Hell Is the Catch? - Hamilton : Satisfied

our troubles will be miles away - Rosemary Clooney : Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

The Nature of My Game - The Rolling Stones : Sympathy for the Devil

nitenai bokura wa hosoi ito de tsunagatte iru - Spitz : Yoru o Kakeru

Nightly, Beside the Green, Green Grass - Sixpence None the Richer : Kiss Me

Where the Memories Flicker - John K. Sampson - Virtute at Rest (SAD CAT SONG WARNING)

when the wind is right - The Weakerthans : This Is a Fire Door, Never Leave Open

And It's Clear, You're On Your Way - The New Amsterdams : Hughes

You Bring the Groom - Fiddler on the Roof : Matchmaker

Dog Problems - The Format : Dog Problems

We Can Both Watch X-Files - Bloodhound Gang : The Bad Touch

allow the hope - John K. Sampson : Winter Wheat

Wish On Everything; She's Okay and It's Raining There Again  - The Weakerthans : Exiles Among You

Love and Joy Come to You  - Traditional : Here We Come a Wassailing

But It Feels Alright - Britney Spears : (You Drive Me) Crazy

And I Thought I Was So Smart - Hamilton : Dear Theodosia 

Time's a Gentle Stream (Longer Than It Seems) - Over the Garden Wall : Patient Is the Night

If Someone Said I'd Be So Dumb; The Princess There Is Me - The Magnetic Fields : Long Forgotten Fairytale

Spooky Scary - Tracy Jordan : Werewolf Bar Mitzvah

Just Say Yes - Taylor Swift : Love Story

I Wreck It (You Fixed It!) - Wreck-It Ralph : Wreck-It, Wreck-It Ralph

a socket-set to dismantle this morning - The Weakerthans : My Favorite Chords

You Can Take a Piece of Mine - Catatonia : Road Rage

And Who's to Say That They Won't Sing to Me?; Still We Should Be Prepared to Leave - John K. Sampson : Alpha Adept

There's a Flame, There's a Spark - Say Hi to Your Mom : But She Beat My High Score

Let's Talk About Spaceships - Say Hi to Your Mom : Let’s Talk About Spaceships

Some Speak of the Future - Bob Dylan : Love Minus Zero/No Limit

Kiss You on the Mouth and Tell You I'm Your Biggest Fan - Nightmare of You : My Name Is Trouble

War Was In Color - Carbon Leaf : War Was In Color

A Girl With Uninterrupted Prosperity - Cake : Short Skirt, Long Jacket

You Make Me Feel Like I Am Home Again - The Cure : Love Song

Everaftering So Happy - Enchanted : True Love’s Kiss

It Doesn't Show Signs of Stopping - Dean Martin : Let It Snow

My Name in Lights at Carnegie Hall - High School Musical 3 : I Want It All

Three, Two, One, Now Fall In My Arms - We the Kings : Check Yes Juliet

So Happy Together - The Turtles : So Happy Together

No Escape, No Change of Heart - Aida : Written in the Stars

Good Heart, Soft Touch, Fast Horse - Faith Hill : This Kiss

In Some Old-Fashioned Way - The Police : Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic

Who Said Life Was Easy and Who Said a Man Was Fair? - The Magnetic Fields : Sweet-Lovin’ Man

Me Myself I Got Nothing to Prove - Tracy Chapman : Fast Car (Also here’s a super cool Japanese cover of Fast Car)

And You Can Have This Heart to Break - Billy Joel : And So It Goes

when the truth is told (you can get what you want or you can just get old) - Billy Joel : Vienna

I've Been Awake For So Long - Basia Bulat : La-Da-Da

From Give and Take - Joni Mitchell : Both Sides Now

A Date With Botticelli’s Niece - The Band : When I Paint My Masterpiece (Bob Dylan cover)

It Varies From Season to Season, Kid - Death Cab For Cutie : Why You’d Want to Live Here

You Hurt But Learn - Yoko Kanno : I Recommend Instincts

Happiness Is Where You Are - Moana : Where You Are

Take Me Out to Dinner Like You Did Last Week - Lightspeed Champion : Everyone I Know Is Listening to Crunk

The Darkest Ages Couldn't Kill - Billy Joel : Two Thousand Years

A History of Taking Off My Shirt - Barenaked Ladies : One Week

It Was Clear That Day, So We Faked It - The Postal Service : Clark Gable

I'll Talk You To Sleep - Lisa Loeb : Sandalwood

Wherever We Land, May We Grow : John K. Sampson : Prayer For Ruby Elm

Looking For a New Way, Way of Living - Laleh : Speaking of Truth

We Can Make It If We Take It Slow - The Killers : When You Were Young

I Thought I Should Spend My Time Alone - Doctors & Dealers : Social Skills

Sweet After All These Years - Billy Joel : Famous Last Words