#i just needed something to throw me off a bit so i switched art program and i think its helping with my stupid perfectionism so mission acc

[dizzybizz]

raptor hands so true

[jincherie]

say so | knj & ksj [m]

! —  COMMISSION  — !

❥ — pairing: namjoon x reader x seokjin ❥ — genre: poly, 1950s au/rockabilly au, smut, childhood f2l, angst, fluff, musician!namjin, burlesque!mc ❥ — words: 24.5k+ ❥ — rating: 18+ ❥ — warnings: light angst, pining, smut !!!; oral (all kinds), anal, fingering, squirting, multiple orgasms, edging, light switch!joon, light switch!oc, harder dom!jin, double pentration, cockwarming, reverse cowgirl etc.... if I forgot sometihng I will add it later but for now this is it fellas. ❥ — notes: oh my god I am FINALLY ejecting this fic from my brain !!! part of the reason this took so long was, of course, the current circamstances across the world mixed in with a few personal factors, but also because I haven’t written a ‘historical’ fic before and I wanted to make sure I got it right ! of course, that somehow ended with me going way over word count so i am so sorry for that, but i truly hope you like it! I haven’t gone over it yet but i will do that later, i just wanted to post and get this fic out of my asshole

Returning to your hometown for a week is something you’ve managed to avoid for three years, but when you can finally put it off no longer you find upon arrival the very thing you were scared of encountering. When the two famous childhood friends you haven’t spoken to in years have returned at the same time as you, you can’t quite tell whether you’re going to be able to make it out in one piece or emerge with a heart more wounded than before.

Especially since it turns out the feelings you thought you were over never quite went away.

— masterlist |  posted; 17.08.2020

You didn’t really expect to find yourself back here so soon, but here you are— everything in your room is in exactly the same state as it was three years ago.

The covers on your bed, the magazine cuttings, faded posters and hand-painted canvases that mark the phases of your youth hung on your wall—even the light-toned floral wallpaper and the little knickknacks atop your dresser are the same. It makes something like nostalgia rise within you, a reminiscent haze filtering through your thoughts. It has been too long since you’ve been back here, and the guilt that always lingers in the back of your mind now pushes its way to the forefront. You feel bad, not having been back to your childhood home in so long, despite the reasons you had for moving away.

You haven’t been here all that long, but as soon as you finished talking with your parents downstairs your feet had carried you here, more out of habit that anything. Absentmindedly, you brush your hand over the oak of your dresser, curious when your fingertip comes back without a single speck of dust. Your mother must have come through often to clean. The realisation both warms your heart and compounds the guilt you feel, making you frown.  In an effort to distract yourself, you turn your gaze back to the rest of your old room, catching sight of a few photographs plastered above your study desk. You know what they contain, and still you can’t seem to help yourself as you draw closer and peer at them anew. They’re just as familiar to your eyes as you expected.

Of course, in this house you’d be lucky to find a photograph of you that didn’t also have these two in it. 

Your eyes skip over the older ones with yellowing glaze and curled corners to focus on the most recent-looking image, drinking in the two boys you’d spent the entirety of your childhood and teen years with. Easily your best friends, until… well, until three  years ago. A fond smile fights its way to your lips; you remember when this was taken. Your mother had lined the three of you up for a photo in the yard but at the very last second they’d pushed you into the pool. Both boys stand tall in the image, but you’d recognise the taller one with the goofy grin anywhere, even if his face wasn’t already plastered across newspapers and featuring on the television every other evening. Namjoon is just as boyish in the image as you recall, and next to him where they stand laughing over the pool is Seokjin, appearance every bit as neat and clean as you’ve glimpsed in recent years when he has featured in a magazine or program that is particularly popular with the youth. It was always a bit weird to you, a little hard to process, that the two boys you’ve known since the three of you were in diapers are now pretty much, well… celebrities. Something bubbles in your chest, the pressure of a sigh but the weight of something you’re not quite ready to name yet. Distantly, in the back of your mind, a tiny part of you whispers that it tastes a little like regret, and sounds a little like yearning.

Growing up, the two of them had discovered an affinity for music, and you for the arts. You suppose that small difference is what eventually led to the distance that grew between you, before you left— if not for the fact that they found the limelight so naturally and built popularity quicker than anticipated after their individual musical debuts. It really didn’t take them all that long to begin steadily growing their fanbase within the youth of your town, their songs played more and more often on local stations. Before long people even a few cities over caught wind of them, but you didn’t get to see it. By the point they had spread their wings that far, you were already gone.

You wrinkle your nose, not liking this sudden trip down a particular lane in your memory that you’ve been avidly avoiding the past three years. Taking a step back from the desk that the photographs hang above, you desperately search for something else to capture your attention. Fortunately for you, a voice sounds behind you before you can flounder too long.

“Wow, I can’t believe you actually came. How long has it been, forty years?”

You jump slightly, the familiarity of the voice and sheer amount of attitude in the words allowing you to recognise it instantly. You spin, eyes quickly locking onto the familiar head of straight blonde hair and cherubic features that belong to your sister. You’ve kept in touch with her via letter and the occasional call, but other than that this is the first time you’ve seen her in years. She’s a little bit taller than you remember, and she’s filled out a little more now that she’s no longer a gangly teen. You are surprised though to note the absence of the usual distressed denim that she favoured throughout the years. Instead she’s in a neat pair of capris that rise to the dip of her waist, where she has tucked in a bright red blouse beneath a belt. Out of habit, you look down to her feet and catch a glimpse of red canvas shoes that instantly make you want to laugh; your mother never could get her into a pair of heels, even if she managed to get her out of the dungarees that she used to love so much.  Lisa smiles cheekily beneath your scrutiny, opening her arms wide. With a laugh, you throw your own around her, pulling her into a tight hug. 

“You’re so dramatic,” you retort, rolling your eyes even though she can’t see it. “Of course I would come to celebrate my own sister’s engagement. I had to see it with my own eyes to believe it.”

“Why does everyone say the same thing when I talk about it?” Lisa groans, pulling back with a familiar pout that seems to have survived her transition into young adulthood. She slips her arm through your own,  giving your bicep a smack as she leads you from the room. “It’s not that hard to believe that I’m getting married! Also— what on earth have you been up to all these years? Have you been attending classes? You’re in such good shape, oh my goodness—”

Unwittingly, your cheeks flush; you probably shouldn’t tell her the real reason for your current physique lest she blab with champagne-loosened lips about it to the rest of your family at her party. Sober Lisa is the only one that knows how to keep a secret, as you’ve found out through a number of shamefully scrawled confessions in the letters she would send you. A number of things you’d confided in her over the years have since been aired like dirty laundry to some of her friends, much to your mutual regret.

“Uh, yeah. Something like that,” you say dismissively, quickly returning to the previous topic as the two of you descend the stairs. “And it’s probably because of all those things you said when you were younger, like how you’d rather live in a mud hut on a deserted island than ever marry a smelly boy riddled with cooties—”

“Ah, yes,” Lisa sighs, the sound more fond and less ashamed than you were expecting. “Those were the days— I was such a badass little ankle-biter. What has become of me? I must be the one riddled with cooties at this point.”

“Probably,” you muse, catching sight of your mother behind the kitchen counter and shooting her a smile as you move past. Lisa is lucky she hadn’t spoken too loudly or else she’d be getting a light smack for her language. It never seemed to stop her when she was younger though, so you doubt it would have an effect now either.

“A skirt at the knee, y/n?” Your mother lets out a dramatic, scandalous gasp upon seeing you. “I don’t even know who you are anymore.”

“These are the clothes that you greeted me in?” You give her a pained look; apparently you need readjusting to her oddball sense of humour. She’s always been a little out of place in the straight-laced, conservative society that marks this day and age; your father too, except he was just a bit more sneaky about it. Actually, now that you think about it, Namjoon and Seokjin’s parents were always a little more on the liberal side too… What an odd coincidence that the three families ended up in a row at the end of the same cul-de-sac.

You’re not deigned with a response, your mother smacking her hands onto the apron she has tied over her baby blue skirt and turning to the oven. You think you hear her muttering about ‘time’ and ‘darn apple pies always taking too long to cook’ and can’t help the way your mouth waters in response. Gods, is it bad if one of the things you missed the most while away is the apple pies your mother makes?

You turn to Lisa, about to ask her whether the apple pie is something you’re going to be able to steal a piece of, only to find that she’s disappeared into thin air. Fantastic. You’re not staying here while you’re back in town, so you’re unsure whether you’re going to be able to cash in on dinner or whether your mother will hold it over your head a little first. You wander over to the  edge of the kitchen, sticking your head into the living room to peer around; you’re curious as to just how much has changed in the time that you’ve been gone. Not as much as you might have hoped, to your chagrin.

“You still have that ugly old thing,” you observe, unable to help the way that your nose wrinkles in response to the sight of the monstrosity still wearing holes into the carpet of the living room.

“My love,” you mother says, giving you an (affectionate) sharp smack on the shoulder as she slips past you, shooting you a bright grin when the thickness of her skirt knocks you slightly. Apparently she’s finished in the kitchen for now; you glance back to see a bowl of nuts joining the bowl of fruit that had been on the counter earlier. “I’d sooner perish than give up your grandmother’s armchair. Besides…. I do so adore how it never fails to draw your ire.”

“I do hate that thing,” your father utters suddenly from the kitchen behind you, his hand reaching for the bowl of fruit; he has his glasses perched on the bridge of his nose, so you figure he must have retired to his study to read after greeting you earlier. He moves just as fast as you remember— your mother didn’t even have a chance to stop him before he was gone as quick as he came, hands full of whatever fruit he couldn’t fit in his mouth. 

“You—!” 

The sound of your father’s laughter tumbles off the walls, and you can’t help the smile that tugs your lips. You did miss this; the liveliness, the feeling of home. 

“y/n, dear, darling, light of my life…”

You turn to your mother, already knowing what is coming next from her tone. One thing you definitely didn’t miss—

“I forgot when I went past earlier, but could you go and fetch some cream from Barb’s? You know, that little store on the corner, down the road from the diner you always used to—”

You’re already turning towards the front of the house, heading for where you’d left your purse with a fond roll of your eyes. “I know where Barb’s is, Ma! I only went away to study, I didn’t lose my memories!”

Your mother’s cheeky laugh is what bids you farewell as you duck out the door and start on your way.

X – x – x

You’d forgotten just how tempting the treats in Barb’s are.

When you exit the small corner store around an hour or so later (it was hardly any distance to walk, but of course Mrs. Park was keen to hold you hostage long enough to squeeze every single detail out of you she could about your time away) it’s with an overflowing paper bag in your arms that holds more than just the cream your mother sent your for. One look at the apple Danish pastries and cinnamon-sprinkled goodies behind the glass of her counter and you’d been unable to help yourself. Your mother did always say that your sweet tooth would be your undoing. 

Walking through the streets that you grew up becoming so familiar with breeds a certain kind of yearning that swells in your chest and borders on painful. This, you suspect, is because most— if not all— of your memories of this place are intrinsically linked with those of the two men who used to take up such a big part of your life; and that therefore then left such a big hole when they were gone. 

It’s hard not to fall into them, the memories. The candy store where the three of you would scrounge up as many coins as you could and pile them all together to get the best sweets on the shelves; the library where you spent as much time goofing off and getting scolded as you did studying in your senior years; even the drive-in cinema, where you used to take your parents cars for the evening and sit on the hood while poking fun at the latest flick to grace the screen. Being back here is making you face something that you have somehow skilfully managed to avoid up until now—

You miss them, Seokjin and Namjoon. You miss your best friends.

This is something that is hammered home further when you reach the point in your journey home where you pass the place featured most in your memories. Dana’s Dinery, probably the only thing more constant in your life than those two boys and your own family. The pink and red hues of its name and the exposed bulbs decorating the signage are something you remember clear as day, and just the sight of it alone has your mouth watering for the burgers and other fried goods they loved to serve there. The kind of food you know is terrible for you, but that you also just can’t get enough of nonetheless. You’ve spent so many nights there that at some point every single member of staff there knew you by name. Of course, since the three of you were barely seen apart at that time, they knew Seokjin and Namjoon, too. 

You’re tempted to duck in and say hello, and before you can even give it much thought your feet are already angling you in that direction, short heels scuffing against the pavement. Through the window you can see the familiar shiny red booth seats and the similarly upholstered stools that line the counter; behind it is a woman with wild, dark curls thrown back in a bun, a pencil behind her ear. Ah, so Mrs. Cara still works there. A petal of affection unfurls in your chest at the sight of her, but drops to the ground in the next second as your gaze slides to the side and halts on two figures currently seated at the counter.

No way. No way.

You freeze, eyes wide as you stand rooted to the spot for just a moment. You know that logically, they can’t be here, but the profiles you can just barely glimpse from this distance are so eerily familiar to that of Namjoon and Seokjin that you think your heart skips perhaps one too many beats. For some reason, your stomach roils with the urge to flee; you just got around to admitting that you miss them, and yet the second you think you might be seeing them, you want to run away? Honestly, it doesn’t make sense—wouldn’t make sense to anyone else privy to the thoughts currently whipping through your mind. 

But you’re a master at stewing in your own thoughts and feelings, familiar with dissecting them until you understand them to the best of your ability at the time. So you know why you promptly turn on your heel and begin hastily back on your way home, abandoning any plans to go inside the diner. You know why, but you’re not quite ready to dwell on it yet, so you push it to the backburner and do your very best not to think about it the whole walk back.

X – x – x

You’re ashamed.

A huff escapes you, your eyes boring into the ceiling, unfocused. After delivering the cream to your mother (and promptly having the extra sweets confiscated until after dinner, lest you snack away your appetite—you guess that answers your question about whether you’re staying for supper) you decided to retire up here for now. You’d thought that your room might feel a little alien to you after all this time away, but when you’d dragged yourself in and shucked your shoes off at the door, it had welcomed you back with an air of nostalgia and open arms. You’re sprawled across your bed now, arms behind your head as you stare at the ceiling. When you were younger, maybe fourteen, you had decorated it with little stars and planets that you’d painted. Well, it wasn’t just you—some of the more crudely decorated renditions towards the wall are courtesy of Seokjin and Namjoon. You wouldn’t say they’re bad at art, just that they have… well, a distinct style that is very them.

Wait, you’re getting distracted—back to the matter at hand: you’re ashamed. 

At this point in your life, if someone had asked you why that particular emotion might be plaguing you right now, then in all honesty you would have a vast array of reasons to give them. But the answer as to why you’re ashamed right now, lies in the two people you could have sworn you glimpsed earlier. 

Now that there is a little temporal distance between you and that particular moment, you can use logic to assure yourself that there’s no way you actually just saw Namjoon and Seokjin at the diner that you all used to haunt in your youth. But in the moment, when you thought you’d seen them, you fell into a bit of a panic. This, you have determined, is because you are ashamed. It’s a little harder to determine why you’re ashamed in relation to them, but what you’ve managed to discern so far is that you feel to blame for the way things went, at least partially. Or, perhaps its that you fear they blame you for the way things went. In reality, from what you remember, they first began to grow apart from each other, and then they began to grow apart from you. That, of course, isn’t something you can blame yourself for. But, what you can blame yourself for – and here is what you think may be the root of your shame – is that you were the one to up and leave suddenly. You were the one to disappear without even a goodbye, almost. You could have kept in touch if you tried, but you’d basically disappeared off the face of the earth.

You wonder if they blame you, or if they might even resent you because of that.

Well, if they even remember you, that is. They’re pretty much in the big leagues now, you remind yourself. They’re making it mainstream and they’re hot on the heels of the most renowned names in the business. 

You’re not very good at comforting yourself. Not that you really attempted it this time, but usually whenever you do you just end up stewing in your thoughts a little. You don’t even realise you’re glaring at the ceiling in the midst of sorting through your mental mess until a knock at the door jerks you out of it. You turn towards it just as it opens and a head pops inside, a gleam you instantly decide you don’t like shining in Lisa’s eyes.

“Come downstairs,” she says cryptically, beginning to ease back out. She only chimes once more when she’s out of view. “If you don’t, I’ll eat all those pastries you brought back! Keep that in mind!”

What on earth… you’re left absolutely confused for a moment, before her last words sink in and you throw yourself from your bed with haste, not even bothering to put your shoes back on before you dart out of the room. The trip downstairs is treacherous in stockings, but you don’t have time to lose. You’re sister isn’t one to bluff, and you don’t want her anywhere near those pastries!

“Don’t you touch those!” you call in warning as you slide across the hardwood floor in the hall and fly down the stairs. “Lisa, I mean it! If you lay a single finger on those pastries you’ll lose it!”

There’s laughter in the direction of the kitchen, and you’re angled to follow the sound when your eyes catch sight of movement to the side and you freeze on the spot. 

“y/n!” your mother cries, clearly ecstatic that you’ve come down to join her. She’s standing in the hall that leads the front door, talking to some people you can’t yet see. “Look who’s here! My, I haven’t seen these two in almost as long as I hadn’t seen you!”

Something like dread, mixed with an odd spike of anticipation, begins to trickle into your abdomen. All too suddenly you remember exactly who you thought you saw earlier, and realise she can only be talking about two people in particular. 

Nervously, you smooth down your skirt and blouse, shooting your mother a look that you hope isn’t too panicked. She is, of course, oblivious, and simply grabs you by the arm to drag you around the corner. 

“I haven’t seen the three of you together in so long! I missed your handsome faces around here, too. Perhaps the height as well— now there’s no one in the house that can reach the top shelf in the pantry.”

Your mother is babbling, but you can’t bring yourself to mind when it saves you from having to speak yourself. As you’d feared, there are two very familiar people standing before you, hovering on your doorstep with almost nervous energy.

“It has been a while,” a soft tone with the luxurious depth of velvet— Seokjin smiles so charmingly at your mother that you think your heart really might have stopped for a second. When his dark eyes turn to you, there is something swirling in their depths that is in such contrast to the winning smile on his lips that you almost feel your knees shake. “y/n, it’s a lovely surprise to catch you here— we didn’t know you were in town as well.”

“Oh, and what brings you two boys back here?” Your mother asks, all too excited to hear exactly what has been going on in their lives since she saw them last. Thankfully, she saves you from having to answer straight away. “Are you back for long?”

“Just a week,” Namjoon answers, bashful smile juxtaposing the beaten leather of the jacket over his shoulders and the low, rough melody of his voice. Oh dear— “We’re actually here celebrating something with a close friend of ours; we were invited to a… party of sorts, you could say.”

You think you might be safe, that he might not say anything to you just yet, when he turns to you and his eyes flick along your form. He smiles again, this time with his dimples making an appearance. 

“It really has been too long, y/n. I’m glad we managed to run into you.”

You know it’s not a dig at you, but you feel your cheeks flush with shame nonetheless.

“Don’t tell me the three of you haven’t seen each other since she left,” your mother gasps, sending you a look that tells you she is going to be wringing information out of you later.

There’s a slight lull in the conversation that tells you it’s your time to chime in. Before you can, though, Seokjin speaks— still with a smile, despite the slight bite of his words. 

“Ah, yeah,” he says, shaking his head. He leans back slightly, switching his weight to the other leg and crossing his arms over his chest— you try not to look at the way it makes his chest and shoulders strain against the material of his button-up. “We wanted to write, or call, but we didn’t know where she was staying to send it. Made it a little hard to keep in touch.”

Your heart squeezes; that was a dig, that was definitely a dig. And you deserved it, but damn you didn’t realise it would hurt that much. And he hadn’t even said anything direct!

“Oh, well this is perfect then!” Your mother smacks you on the back, a little rougher than necessary, making you cough. “y/n is here for the week, why don’t you all catch up? Lisa’s engagement party is on Saturday so any day other than that should be fine— oh, you two should come, by the way! And invite your mothers too; it’s been too long since we’ve all sat down for tea.”

“That would be wonderful,” Namjoon agrees amicably, nodding his head to your mother. “I’m sure they’d love to take you up on that invite— I did get an earful about how lonely she was when I got home earlier.”

You have to fight a smile at that— Namjoon’s mother does have a penchant for the dramatics. You turn your gaze to the side to find Seokjin’s own already boring holes into you— it takes all your willpower not to jump. When he sees he has your attention, he smiles once more.

“We’d love to catch up,” he says, eyes still holding you captive. “How about dinner tomorrow, at Dana’s? I miss the burgers there.”

You catch Namjoon nodding from the corner of your eye, agreeing with the idea, and swallow your nerves down to flash a smile back. “Of course, that sounds fantastic.”

The two men nod, satisfied for now, and Namjoon pipes up once more as they take a step back.

“Well, we should probably get back— if we’re late for supper today we mightn’t be alive for dinner tomorrow,” he jokes, earning a laugh from your mother. His eyes flick to you, unreadable but holding such heat you almost gasp, “We’ll meet you there at seven tomorrow, y/n. I’m lookin’ forward to it.”

“See you, boys!” Your mother waves farewell, jabbing you with her elbow until you join her. “Hurry home!”

They nod with a laugh, and you watch them retreat to their respective homes on either side of yours until your mother closes the door and cuts off your view, turning to you with a look that could mean a number of things. She’s distracted from unleashing a verbal flood on you in the next moment, however, when she catches sight of your feet.

“y/n!” she gasps, tone scolding. “Go put your shoes on! Walking around without them— this isn’t how I raised you, my goodness. You’re going to wear holes in your stockings! Go go go!”

Startled by the way she raises her arm in promise, you yelp and scamper away, back towards the stairs. “Okay, I’m going!”

You’re about halfway up the stairs, petticoat and skirt swishing violently from how fast you scaled them, when she calls after you.

“And don’t think you’re off the hook, missy! You and I are having a long, in-depth chat after dinner!”

You can only resign yourself to your fate.

x - x - x

“I’m in trouble, Mina. Oh, I’m in trouble.”

“It can’t be anything more than the trouble you’re going to be in for wearing holes into the hotel room carpet— stop that! You’re making me anxious!”

You halt mid-pace, sending your friend a pained look. She’s sprawled across the second bed in your hotel room, reading some magazine that touts the latest in makeup and jewellery from some of the more big-name brands.

“Please, just this once, let me be the one having a Diva moment,” you say, almost begging— to your own distaste. You just need someone to vent to, but she’s not exactly being helpful.

“What is this about?” she asks, closing her magazine to pin you with a borderline-grumpy look. “What has your knickers in such a— oh, I love those shorts! Are those new?”

“Uh, yeah. I bought them the other week,” you answer, looking down at the light blue shorts you’d slipped into for comfort’s sake this morning. They’re so comfortable, in fact, that you regret that you’re unable to wear them in public. You quickly shake your head when you realise you’re getting off-topic. “Hey— I told you what this is about! Did you listen to a single thing I said since I got back last night? Do I mean nothing to you?”

“You’re so dramatic,” Mina utters under her breath. “Yes, I was listening! I was just checking we were talking about the same thing!"

The look you give her is dubious at best, "Okay, then what am I talking about?"

"Those two hot cats you grew up with," Mina says, waving her manicured hand dismissively. "What about them is giving you such grief?"

"I ran into them yesterday," you say, eyes unfocused as you fall back into your thoughts once more. "They want to meet for dinner, to catch up."

"Oh, well that's fine," Mina says. "You don't have feelings for them anymore, so it should be alright, yeah?"

You bite your lip, wincing and giving her a look that could only be described as a mixture between sheepish and remorseful.

"Oh, y/n," She sounds a lot like your mother with the tone she's taken now, "Don't tell me..."

"I thought I was over it!" you say, wailing almost, as you throw your arms into the air. "They were already so distant before I left, you know? And it's been so long that I thought the feelings went away."

You huff, one hand on your hip and the other splayed over your face. "But then I saw them yesterday, and I think I nearly had a heart failure. I don't think... that those feelings went away."

When you manage to glimpse her way, Mina is wincing, teeth visible. She reaches up to scratch her hairline, almost dislodging one of the curlers she has wound in her hair. "Well, it's just one dinner... When is it? I'm sure you have plenty of time to get rid of those feelings before you--"

"It's tonight," you say with a certain level of resignation, walking over to your own bed and finally throwing yourself onto it in defeat.

"Tonight?!" Mina positively squawks, scrambling into a sitting position in her disbelief. "Uh, y/n, I do hope you haven't forgotten, but we have a show almost every night Saturday--"

"I know," you bemoan, staring at the ceiling and trying to ignore the odd marks there-- you don't have the brain space to wonder how they even got up there in the first place. "The dinner will be finished in time, I'm not worried about that. I'm just... worried about what will happen during, you know? It's kind of stupid but... what if they hate me now? I didn't even tell them when I left, didn't give them an address to write me or a number to call..."

"Yeah, that was kind of a rude move," Mina says bluntly, "But I don't think they would invite you to dinner to catch up if they hated you, y'know? They were your best friends, they probably missed the hell out of you."

You ponder her words, unable to pick them apart with logic. "Maybe," you mutter, picking at a loose thread on your blouse."... I did miss them."

"See?" Mina says knowingly, giving you a look before falling back on the bed and reaching for the chunky romance novel that she has perched on the headboard above the bed.. "And who knows— you're a hot catch, they might end up returning those feelings and you might come out of this a lucky woman! Well, probably a bit sore in certain places, but lucky nonetheless—”

"MINA!"

The pillow you threw smacks her square in the face, but does nothing to muffle the cackle she lets out after. God, she's not the first choice to come to for advice, but to her credit you do feel a bit better now.

x- x - x

Seven o’clock that evening finds you hovering nervously outside the doors to Dana's Dinery, hand outstretched to take the handle but unable to follow through completely with the movement. For the moment, you're stuck in your thoughts, and your thoughts are stuck on the same thing that had plagued them earlier in the day.

What's going to happen when you walk in there? When you're seated at the table with them and in the process of catching up? You shouldn't be as fearful of it as you are, but you can't help it. The evolution your feelings for them undertook a few years ago aside, they were still very much your best friends. Their opinion of you... well it sucks, but it still matters to you.

Didn’t stop you from doing what you did though, did it?

Huffing and deciding to ignore the nasty little voice that is attempting to make an already stressful night even worse, you force your limbs into action and simply resign to bite the bullet. If they are upset with you, then being late to dinner certainly won’t help things. 

“y/n! Over here!”

With how quickly they spot you, mere seconds after passing through the doorway, a part of you wonders if they saw you hovering outside like a coward. Shame flushes across your neck and ears at the thought, but you do your best to remain at least outwardly unaffected.

Over in the booth at the very end of the diner, nestled against the window and the wall, the two men who have been haunting your thoughts for more than a day sit. You recognise the booth— it’s your Corner, you always sat there with them, to the point where if the staff saw anyone else sit there when they knew you were coming, they’d politely usher them to a new seat. It makes something shift inside you to see them there again. You don’t feel like you’re in school again, but something else feels akin to that time…

It’s probably the butterflies.

Namjoon is grinning at you widely, waving his arm; he’s ditched the leather from yesterday and is now donning a fitted black button-up that brings a nice contrast against the sun-kissed hue of his skin, though his hair is still swept into its style somewhat half-heartedly. Seokjin next to him is in a tan knit turtleneck sweater, glasses perched on his nose and hair attended to much more neatly than the man next to him. Both men are looking at you as you approach, but their stares (especially Seokjin’s) are a little too intense for you to handle, and you end up looking away as you take a seat across from them. 

The booth is less squeaky than you remember, but somehow just as plush. You place your purse and cardigan onto the red leather next to you, clasping your hands together and offering a tentative smile. The soft rock tumbling from speakers around the diner isn’t going to fill the lull in conversation for very long. “Hey, sorry to have kept you waiting…”

Seokjin raises a brow, and you know in that moment that they did indeed see you hovering outside the diner. You don’t have time to process the embarrassment that follows that realisation, though, before Namjoon begins speaking with a warm smile. 

“Don’t worry, you didn’t,” he informs you, eyes glimmering like he’s just happy to have you here. It makes something painful throb in your chest. “And loosen up, would you? You’re sitting like you’re at a job interview.”

To your embarrassment, a brief internal examination of your posture tells you that he is right. Sheepishly, you allow the tension to drain from your body, leaning forward onto the table slightly. “Sorry,” you mumble, offering a smile. “Guess I’m just a bit wound up from being home. I forgot how chaotic it is here…”

To your surprise, Seokijn snorts; your fears that he was truly upset with you are dispelled somewhat as a lopsided grin tugs his plush lips, eyes meeting yours levelly.  “Tell me about it. My mother had my aunt and the cousins over when I got home. I haven’t felt as exhausted as I did after that night in, well, years.”

You don’t notice the smile Namjoon shoots to the man beside him when he first speaks, but you do notice when he lets out a laugh and beams so brightly that his eyes almost close and something you completely forgot about makes an appearance. His dimples have always been a weak spot of yours, and you’re slightly horrified to find that glimpsing them now has led to a skipped beat in your chest and a flutter in your stomach. 

It’s not looking very good for the state of your old feelings right now…

“You never unwind properly,” Namjoon says, somewhat chastising despite his playful tone. He doesn’t pursue it further, though. Instead, he turns to you with a soft smile. “So, y/n, how was college? If you have replaced us as best friends, I will never forgive you.”

You can’t help the laugh that tumbles from your throat at both his words and his face, Seokjin chuckling to himself in the corner. Still smiling, you tell him that no, you haven’t replaced them, and sort through the events of your first year for something they’d like to hear. 

Just like that, and definitely much easier and less stilted than you feared it would be, the three of you seem to sink back into something like the old dynamic you used to share, conversation beginning to flow and laughter beginning to tumble. There are some small differences, of course. Namjoon, who used to be much more clumsy and prone to blushing in his fluster, now seems to have come into his own and his presence commands your attention whenever he speaks or gestures, each movement sure and with confidence. While Seokjin used to be the more blatant joker between the three of you, now he seems to sit back a bit, observing conversation contentedly until he sees the perfect opportunity to chime in and elicit a few laughs. 

And then, there’s you.

Well, you suppose you haven’t changed all that much. When Ms. Cara comes around to take your order (amongst gushing about how grown up and handsome and beautiful the three of you look), you still order the same thing from the menu, go about eating it the same way (fries before burger, being sure to leave some so you can slip them under the bun), and feel the same butterflies running amok in your stomach as you did years ago. You know that you’ve changed a lot, an almost scary amount, but sitting here in this diner with the two men who used to be your best friends, you’re only realising just how much of you is the same.  

“I still don’t know how you can eat that,” Namjoon says, pausing in scarfing his own dessert down to judge you for yours. “You always used to get it— aren’t you sick of it?”

“Hey!” Seokjin intercepts, pointing his spoon at Namjoon. “The Fun Sized Sundae with the Triple Sauce Special is a respectable choice of dessert, and I won’t have you shaming it when you’re just sitting there with pudding and custard!”

You chuckle at Seokjin’s avid defence of your choice— the two of you were the only ones with a big enough sweet tooth to be able to combat the sugary monster that is your choice of dessert. He hadn’t braved it tonight, though, opting instead for apple pie.

“I actually haven’t had it since I was last here,” you say, without even thinking. Another spoonful is already on its way to your mouth as you continue, “It’s one of the things I missed most after I—”

You cut yourself off, realising your blunder too late. The looks in their eyes tell you they know what you were about to say. After I left. Ah, how could you forget? You’ve been here over an hour and this is the first time it’s crossed your mind since you entered. You left— you. Not them, but you.

Your appetite suddenly begins to fade, and you place your spoon down as gently as you can. It still tinks against the bowl, but does little to break the tension beginning to seep into the air.

You clear your throat, growing a little antsy in your seat. Even as you ask, you’re unable to meet their eyes, “Ah, what time is it? We— I got a little carried away…”

The question had mostly been to dispel some of the awkwardness, but Namjoon’s response had you shooting up ramrod straight. “It’s five-to-nine.”

“Oh, shoot,” you don’t even think about the words escaping your mouth, just that way more time had passed than you thought and if you stay any longer then you’re going to be bordering dangerously close on being late for your other very important commitment tonight. “I— I have to go. I’m so sorry, I didn’t realise how late it was.”

You hurry to gather your cardigan and purse, starting to shimmy out of the booth, when Seokjin speaks up, “Is everything alright? Where are you off to in such a rush? If you need, we can walk you—”

“No!” you burst, regret swallowing you moments later when you see how taken aback the two men are at your sudden rise in tone. “No, sorry, it’s okay. I just, um… I just have to pick up something, for Lisa’s party.”

“At nine o’clock at night?” Jin verifies, brows drawing down.

“Uh, yeah,” you say, voice small as you manage to finally get out of the booth and stand somewhat sheepishly at the end. “I’m so sorry, it was so lovely meeting you two again and catching up. I’ll, um… I’ll see you, at Lisa’s party.”

You barely allow them enough time to bid their own farewells before you’re turning on your heel and hightailing it out of there before one of them comes to their senses and offers to walk you again. 

You definitely do not need one of your old best friends walking you to the entrance of a club.

A fifteen minute cab ride is what you choose instead, and it isn’t long before you’re slipping into the building from the back entrance and dashing through the halls.

“FINALLY,” Mina erupts dramatically when she catches sight of you bursting into the dressing room, brows raising so high they almost meet her bangs. “I almost thought you were going to stand us up, Miss Luna.” 

Your eyes sweep over her form, alarm filling you at the fact she’s already mostly dressed, from her netted stockings to the many fluffy and feathery layers that she’ll be discarding on the stage tonight. She’s currently sitting at the dresser, putting the final touches on her makeup with small detail brushes.

“That lip colour is too orange,” you inform her, hastily rushing over to the chest that you know contains your outfit for tonight. Mina halts in her motions, staring at herself in the mirror for a long moment before she tilts her head back and lets out a loud, torturous groan.

“I knew it! Momo, you lied to me! I asked you if this colour was too orange or warm and you said—”

You shake your head, slinging the clothes you retrieved over your arm and making your way over to the screen in the corner to get changed. You feel a little bad for the girl currently on the receiving end of Mina’s whines, but on the other hand you’re now free to rush about and catch up to the rest of your co-performers. 

Within the next ten minutes you’re dressed and ready to go, dropping into a seat next to Mina and reaching to begin powdering your face.

From the tingle of excitement beginning to thrum in the air, you can only assume it won’t be long now before the show begins.

x   x   x   x 

Burlesque. It’s something that you know from experience, something you’d sadly gained before you grew more skilled at hiding your profession from the judging eyes of others, has some quite divided views and opinions. Despite how open-minded and liberal as your parents are, you know even they would struggle to come to terms with the fact that their beloved daughter had moved away for college and somehow come to perform in burlesque theatres on the side. 

You don’t even have a clear explanation as to how or why you’d ended up down this path, just that you had. Contrary to what a majority of the population would likely hope, you aren’t ashamed, and you don’t regret it. This is something you love, and you think part of the reason you had been so drawn to it in the first place was the promise of power nestled within a certain kind of anonymity.

Your act, after all, is a masquerade performed beneath the security of an intricate lace and silk colombina disguise.

When you’d first left, you’d felt… well, there wasn’t any other way to put it but rejected, and abandoned. You might have been the one that left, and it’s something you regret now, but at the time it was Namjoon and Jin who had grown distant from both each other and you. Coupled with their increasing popularity and the way their lives seemed to be picking up speed in the direction they’d always dreamed of, it made you realise that their world was getting a little too big for you, and in the scheme of their lives you no longer held a starring role.

So you’d packed up and moved away, and in the midst of your aimless moping in another city, you’d stumbled upon this… and from the first taste of empowerment it gave you in the wake of all you had been feeling, you quickly decided you weren’t going to be letting it go anytime soon. 

And now here you are; an act with such high regard and admiration that you had been called to perform it in other cities. It was a stroke of fortune that one of the stops was your own hometown, at the same time as your sister’s engagement party no less. You had wondered at the time what the catch had to be, and now, of course, you know.

It’s that in an instance of divinely aligned misfortune, the two people you’d planned to avoid indefinitely happened to be here as well.

It’s been a few days since the night you spent catching up with them, and there is enough distance between then and now for you to have calmed significantly when thinking about it. It had been kind of weird, sneaking away from the diner to come perform that night. Even though years have passed, you’re still so used to telling them everything whenever you see them, that holding something back feels foreign, and oddly enough… you feel a little guilty. The first excuse that comes to your mind in your defence is that  ‘they wouldn’t understand anyway’. You know that is baseless, though. Both of them have become popular and risen to fame not just because of their natural musical talent, but for the topics that their music so brazenly broaches.

The truth is that you know they wouldn’t judge you for anything you do, and you’re not quite sure why you’re so resistant to them knowing. The human mind is a mystery, and yours is no exception.

A slow, smooth saxophone melody brushes your ears, a lower note capturing your attention and bringing you back to the present moment. Amongst the faint tendrils of smoke that reach you from the seating area, an itch rises at your brow and you fight to contain it, not wanting to rub off the thin arch you’d drawn on so carefully earlier. It was always like this; you always got itchy before performing, for reasons unknown to you. One of your friends had theorised that it was due to nerves, or something similar. It drove your manager mad, because you’d ripped your costume pantyhose a few times while scratching your thighs in the past.

Mina’s act precedes yours, usually, and tonight isn’t any different. She’s good, and you can’t help but marvel as you watch her. Her movements are fluid, full of a certain zest and allure that mix into a single heady cocktail that has the crowd enraptured as she allows her skirts to drop ever so slowly with each smooth swing and sashay of her hips. When the ruffled fabric hits the floor there are hoots and whistles from the crowd, and Mina’s beaming face peeks over her shoulder to deliver a wink. The room eats it up.

It’s a special performance, tonight.

Due to confidentiality, none of the performers had been told exactly who was attending tonight, just that they were Very Important People, and they were to be shown the best performance they would ever see in their lives. It was an ambitious set of instructions, but you know that both yourself and the other girls in the show are some of the best in the business, so you aren’t too worried about meeting expectations. You plan to exceed them. 

You always put effort into your appearance, but tonight you admit that you did try the tiniest bit harder than usual. Your hair is pulled back from your face, twisted and pinned into curls at the top of your head; the rest of it you simply allowed to hang to its natural length and shape, though you took care to make sure it was soft and silky enough to gleam beneath the stage lights. At Mina’s insistence, you’d allowed her to pin a few small glittery ornaments amongst the curls, and as you peek out and see just how full the room is, you find yourself thanking her mentally. It’s the little details that really pull together a performance and hammer home the effect it has on the audience, and it looks like a full house tonight that you’re going to wow. Though, none of the faces seem to jump out at you so far— you still don’t know who tonights VIPs are. 

Even though tonight is meant to be a big, important night — as it had been emphasised to you so many times — you still find your thoughts wondering back to a certain two men and the reappearance of the feelings you’d once harboured for them. You’re conflicted, as anyone might expect of someone in your situation, but you can’t say you’re very fond of the feeling. Hence, despite your best efforts, your thoughts just keep coming back to your current predicament. Lisa’s party is tomorrow, and you know from yesterday’s visit to your home that your mother had already extended an enthusiastic invitation to both families on either side of the fence. So you know that there is absolutely no way that those two aren’t going to be there, since even if they hadn’t already expressed their intention of attending, their mother’s would drag them over by the ear.

You’re not sure why you’re still worrying about this. You already met and caught up with them! And it went well… or at least it did, until the topic of your abrupt disappearance from their lives was brought up. 

Perhaps that is why you’re so conflicted still. That is an issue that has yet to be resolved.

When you tune back in to the moment and catch your manager sending you a whithering look, you shake your head and decide to try and ground yourself so that you’re not off with the fairies by the time your cue to perform rolls around. You bring your gaze back to the stage, finding that in the time you spent in your own head, Mina had managed to strip down to just her shelf brassiere and the panties and baby blue garter belt with straps that stretched over her shapely thighs and attached to the top of her stockings.

You get lost in the moment, watching as the spotlight follows her across the stage and illuminates each small gesture she makes that draws the audience further and further under her spell. Her hair is perfectly curled and with each flick of her head and bat of her lashes, the strands slide over her shoulder and bounce against her back. As she reaches for her final garment to discard, it isn’t long before the light fades in tandem with the last note of her song, and the audience gets only the barest glimpse of Mina’s almost bare form before the stage is blanketed in darkness. Cheers and applause break the beat of silence that follows, and then Mina is hurriedly rushing past you, beaming with pride and holding most of her discarded skirts bunched up to her chest. Soon, the applause fades out, the hollers nonexistent, and the stage is cleared.

Now, it’s your turn to wrap the audience around your finger. 

Taking a deep breath and revelling in the light fluttering of your stomach that never seems to fade no matter how many shows you perform, you listen for the first few strumming notes of the song that accompanies your routine. When the low, bass riff of guitar finally brushes the air, you make your way slowly onto the stage and let yourself fall into the familiarity of the show.

It’s kind of ironic, you can’t help but think to yourself. Considering the events of this week, the song you’d chosen to tailor your routine to is kind of funny. For the first few years of their careers, you’d seen Namjoon and Seokjin simply go their separate ways. You thought that would be it, that your friendship had broken up for good, but to your complete and utter surprise, at the beginning of this year there had been a new record to grace the radio and enrapture young fans across the country. An unexpected collaboration between two of the biggest figureheads of the rock and rebellion movement that had started to sweep through the youth. 

When you had first heard the song, you’d done a double-take. It wasn’t anything like the rapid, upbeat rock that came to be synonymous with Seokjin’s name, or the heavier, laidback tune that usually accompanied Namjoon’s records. The beat that lay beneath the lyrics was sultry, deep and dark and made your heart skip a beat and your stomach dip. However when the lyrics registered in your mind, you’d had to fight the urge to cry. They weren’t strictly sad, per se, but to you… they had spoken a little deeper. It felt paranoid to think it, but a part of you had to wonder at how… targeted… the song had seemed to be—

Was it made... for you?

You wouldn’t be caught dead admitting it aloud to anyone or even yourself, but you liked to think so. It helped, when you found yourself missing them and yearning for the way things had been. It soothed the traitorous aching of a heart that didn’t seem to remember that the choice to leave hadn’t been theirs, but rather yours.

In the version that accompanies your performance, there are no vocals. Even so, the beat is easily recognisable and as it begins to play, an excited murmur sweeps through the crowd. Something about it is a little odd, but currently your back is turned to the audience, so you don’t get to investigate the feeling. Instead, you let each note that enters the air and brushes against your skin to soak into your being, closing your eyes for the barest second to centre yourself before you feel the heat of the lights begin to grace your skin, and you start to slowly swing your hips.

It is only instruments that brush your ears now, but you can hear the opening lines of the song so clearly in your head you can’t help but mouth them in time.

We're part of the moonlight, Ain't a fantasy...

Can't breathe in the sunlight, Gotta hide your heart...

Following the rise and fall of the beat, you turn your head over your shoulder to deliver a sly smile and a wink, moving your hips all the while— a round of catcalls and surprised murmurs results. You are the only one of the performers to wear a mask after all, so you’re not surprised by the response. Turning back around, your ease yourself into the familiar motions of your routine and let the song and atmosphere carry you away.

At any other time, you would probably find it funny how second nature stripping yourself of your clothes has become. The silky gown that drapes over your shoulders and ends in faux fur ruffles that trail across the floor is the first to go, revealing the entirety of your stocking-clad legs through a sheer petticoat, and the corset and cushioned bandeau that hides a sheer, cheekily embroidered bralette beneath. The audience eats the reveal right up and at the enthusiastic response, your chest swells with pride. You’re smiling, but with a flick of your wrist you snap open a fan and use it to cover the bottom half of your face, leaving only your eyes to peer out at the crowd from behind the mask. You’d discovered early on that a little bit of mystery keeps them intrigued a little longer.

You don’t pay much mind to the audience as individuals; more often than not, when you perform they become a faceless blur. But as your routine goes on and your body follows each sultry move to the beat, one item of clothing discarded after the other, you find yourself paying a little more attention than you usually would. 

It’s as the top part of your corset meets the floor and your sheer bralette is exposed that your eyes sweep over a certain portion of the room, and you realise very suddenly and abruptly who the guests of honour are tonight.

And you cannot believe the atrocity of your luck.

Two familiar faces return your gaze from the centre-back portion of the room, in one of the deluxe booths. It’s a wonder you can recognise them through the haze of smoke created by cigars and cigarettes, but you think that you’d be hard-pressed not to, at this point. Seokjin and Namjoon sit back comfortably in the booth with two unfamiliar men on either side of them, their eyes lit with a certain kind of intrigue and focused solely on you. For a heartbeat, your chest feels so tight you can’t take in a breath, stomach fluttering. Just barely, you manage to maintain your face and stop yourself from stumbling in your routine. The beginning of panic begins to bubble beneath your lungs, but in a split-second it is stopped in its tracks as something seems to snap inside you and you come to a realisation.

You’re wearing a mask. They don’t know it’s you.

It strikes you again, the way they eyes are trained on your every move, and it knocks you breathless once more, though for a different reason this time. Exhilaration begins to course through you— you feel powerful. When you were with them the other day, the weight of the knowledge of your wrongs and your guilt held you on unequal ground. But now, here in the heady allure and smoky seduction in this room, you have them in the palm of your hands and the dynamic is switched, if only for a moment. 

With barely a moment having lapsed since your initial realisation, you slip right back into the next move in your dance, each shift of a limb accompanied with just that little bit more oomph than before. This is their song, the song you suspect they wrote for you, and since you don’t think you will ever be able to forget it, or them, you will make sure they won’t forget this.

One fluid movement leads to the next, the beat picking up ever so slightly as you bend, legs straight and behind pointed at the crowd, before easing your way back up and unclasping the hooks that keep your corset together. When it falls, you turn and bend once more, this time facing the audience so that they see it when you push your breasts together and wriggle your shoulders, a cheeky wink accompanying the resulting jiggle of your chest. 

More hoots and hollers, as expected of an audience that seems to completely consist of men tonight, and you’re pleased to see that the two guests of the hour aren’t completely unaffected either. Namjoon is leaning forward slightly, gaze intense, and Seokjin’s eyes have narrowed in focus as they follow you across the stage. 

Following each note in the song, you strut across the stage, and when there is a pause before it picks up once more, you drop to your knees and reach forward to the floor, arching your back with your behind to the audience again. Using the strength you’ve built in your thighs over the years, you slide one leg up and turn yourself around, using the momentum to slip into an abridged version of the splits. While in this position you bend backwards, one arm reaching back to unravel the ribbon that keeps your flimsy bralette up. When you feel it come loose, you bring your hands to each piece and make a faux-shocked expression, ever so slowly peeling the sheer fabric down and revelling in the way the room is watching with bated breath. 

Your breasts bounce as you yank the bralette all the way down, the tassels that were hidden beneath and keep the barest remainder of your dignity intact jiggling with the movement. Using the cheers that result as a distraction of sorts, you deftly remove the bralette with one hand and discard it slyly on the floor, bringing yourself out of the splits but moving to another position on your knees, sliding your legs apart. There are a few soft gasps and sharp inhales that echo from the front of the crowd, and you can tell from the way their eyes are focused on the inside of your thighs that they’ve glimpsed the pretty picture inked into your skin there. You don’t leave their gazes to wonder too long though, reaching up to pinch the dangling ornaments of your tassels and using them to lift your breasts. You ignore the low, pleasurable tingle that shoots through you at the sensation of tugging on your nipples, fighting to keep your legs open, and release the tassels from your grip. Your breasts bounce generously once more, cheers sounding across the room at the sight. You deliver a wink, before bringing yourself off of the floor in a fluid movement, hearing the final notes of the song beginning to play and a low, sexy saxophone drawl emerging to intertwine with the rest.

The end of your routine passes in a blur, your mind slipping into a haze as you simply move, barely aware of the way you dance and sashay across the stage. A feathery boa situated strategically to the side becomes incorporated in your final moves, allowing the audience peeks at what they can’t have and drawing them further and further in until the music hits a crescendo and with it, you fall into your final pose.

The last thing you see, as the lights begin to dim and the crowd erupts into applause, is the way Seokjin and Namjoon’s eyes are boring holes into you, transfixed on the place where your hip meets the inside of your thigh and the intricate depiction of a crescent moon and a rose that are inked into the skin there.

 x    x    x

 “...sweetheart? Is there a reason why you haven’t gone outside yet? Everyone is by the pool with those wonderful finger foods your Aunt brought with her!”

You startle at the sound of your mother’s voice, almost dropping the grape that had been en route to your mouth as you stared into nothing, rooted in place in the middle of the kitchen. The day of your sister’s engagement party has come, faster than you were able to prepare for, and now that you’re no longer on the stage staring down your two ex-best friends from behind a mask, you’ve lost a lot of your gall. In fact, it could even be argued that your spine had slipped right out of your body the second you stepped off the stage that night. It’s the early afternoon, and Namjoon and Seokjin have been here for about… perhaps half an hour. You don’t claim to be perfect, but the way you’ve been skulking about and hiding in the kitchen is pathetic even to you. 

It’s just… how do you face them after that? They’ve technically seen you almost completely in the nude! If your grandmother ever caught wind of the fact that a man had seen you without clothes then she’d marry you off immediately— not to mention if she ever found out Seokjin and Namjoon, of all men, had seen you like that, she would have an absolute field day!

It was bordering on disheartening, but at this point, even after all this time, you’re pretty sure most of your family loves those two more than they love you.

“I, um… just wanted some grapes?” you blink, offering a sheepish smile that you hope your mother doesn’t find suspicious. That is quickly shot down when you see her brow raise and her bright cherry lips quirk to the side, eyes flicking to the empty glass by the grapes that reeks of gin. What can you say, you thought downing a glass would help you cope, but you’d been wrong. 

“Uhuh…” Your mother says, folding her arms and leaning her hip against the bench; the fullness of her skirt swishes behind her in an echo of the movement. “Well, now that you’ve eaten half of the vine, maybe go outside? Mrs Kim has been asking where you are, I think she missed you almost as much as we did.”

Your brows furrow, “Wait, which Mrs K—”

“Off you go, sweetheart!” 

You don’t even get to finish whatever you were saying because your mother moves into the kitchen solely to chase you out of it. You drag your feet as she herds you out— or at least, you do before she reaches for the kitchen towel by the oven and starts twisting it.

“I’m going!” you promptly flee after grabbing a handful of grapes to-go, holding up a proverbial white flag. Your mother is a little too good at turning mundane household items into a weapon. Now she’s put the fear of god back in you, you find yourself thinking that it’s no wonder your father has always been so well-behaved compared to the stories some of your friends would tell you about their own parents.

It’s a beautiful day, really. It’s part of the reason you were annoyed at yourself for hiding inside, even if it was only for about half an hour. The sun is out, the sky is clear, and while the sunlight warms your skin there is a cool breeze every so often that keeps you from overheating. Some of your younger cousins are in the pool, and have probably been there since around ten minutes after they arrived an hour or so ago. You’d barely gotten a hug in greeting before they were off, the backyard pool held a little more favourably in their eyes for the moment than their own flesh and blood.

They’re cute, though, so you decide that perhaps just this once you will let them get away with it. You’re going to rain down a storm of kisses on them before they leave, though. No one ignores you for an inanimate object and gets away with it!

As you exit the house and step beneath the sun, the skin of your arms and lower legs warming instantly, you just barely manage to dodge as one of your cousins comes bolting past you, followed barely a second later by his mother, your aunt, who is hotter on his heels than you might have anticipated for a woman her age.

“Jackson! You better get back here with those patties, boy, or you’re gonna regret it!”

You know you shouldn’t laugh, because it will encourage the bad behaviour, but the sight is so funny you just can’t help the way you burst into giggles, shaking your head and turning in the direction of the large gazebo that is rooted by the pool and is currently sheltering most of the guests from the sun. A quick scan also reveals that the lady of the hour, your sister, is over there too. Your eyes narrow when they catch sight of the champagne glass in her hand; hopefully she’s forgotten any and all things you’ve told her in confidence recently, or else they’re about to become public knowledge.

“Ah, y/n, just a moment!” 

You pause in your steps, turning just in time to catch in your arms the plate of small pastries your mother shoves into your hold. 

“Wh—” you don’t get to question her, as she simply flashes you a bright grin and nods her head to the table. “Take these over there, will you? And make sure Jin and Joon get some, I made their favourite!”

And then she is off, shooting back into the house and leaving you on the grass. At the delicious smell that wafts up to your nose, you send a cursory look down at the plate and hum in recognition,ignoring the way your mouth salivates. Ah, these are their favourites. This plate probably won’t last very long when you bring it over there. 

You’re on your way once more, now with the plate of sweets in tow, and the closer to the gazebo you grow you catch the sound of the radio, on one of the channels most popular with the youth and playing one of Lisa’s favourite songs. She’s dancing, dragging her friend Rose with her, giggling like a madwoman as she does so. It brings a smile to your face without you even realising. 

“Oh, y/n! There you are! Where have you been? We thought you might have gotten lost!”

Your attention is drawn to the side of the gazebo closest to the pool, where a few people are lounging in the chairs there, beers and glasses with clear, bubbling contents that you can only assume is gin and tonic on the table and in hand. The older woman who called you over with such a teasing tone is Mrs Kim— well, one of them. Both the Kims are here, and you realise belatedly that of course, their sons are too. It was Seokjin’s mother that noticed you, and as you make your way over you see Namjoon’s mother next to her, and the two men in question in the lounging chairs opposite. They seem to light up at your arrival, and you try not to think about the way their reaction makes your stomach flutter. You aren’t here for them, you’re here for their mothers! 

“Sorry,” you apologise, leaning and placing the plate down on the small table in the middle of the seats. Straightening, you dust your hands against the patterned skirt you have buttoned over your matching swimsuit. “I did get a bit lost, there’s so many kids here right now I thought I might have turned up in the wrong house.”

Both women erupt into laughter at your words, and you take the opportunity to smile at Jin and Namjoon, offering a timid wave. They return it, before following your finger as it points to the plate and they realise you’ve brought them their favourite baked goods.

“Cinnamon scrolls!” Namjoon croons, material of his navy button-up creasing as he hastily leans forward to swipe one off the plate. “And they’re shaped like little fish, like she always used to do! I can’t believe your mother made them today.”

“Of course,” you say, snorting lightly. “She’d do anything for her two favourite sons. She made it because they’re your favourites.”

The two of them beam in pride at that, before proceeding to consume the plate of sweets.

“Ah, and she sent you too, sweet y/n! Our favourite daughter! And even more stunning than I remember, right Soo-ah?”

Seokjin’s mother, Jia, hastily reclaims the conversation and succeeds in making you flush pink at her words. Jisoo, Namjoon’s mother, instantly nods, her short curls bouncing with the action, and shoots you a devious grin. 

“It’s been so long since we saw you last, y/n. You didn’t get a husband while you were away, right? We still want you as our daughter-in-law, you know.”

This time it’s not only you that feels the embarrassment heat your cheeks— to your side, both men choke on the mouthful of scroll they’d been in the process of devouring, Seokjin’s face going bright red as he brings his fist to hit his chest and attempts to dislodge the pastry. Amongst his own struggling, Namjoon reaches to smack his friend on the back, clearing his own throat.

“Ah, no…” you say, awkward and smoothing your skirt to distract yourself; it feels like the eyes of the entire party are on you, despite the fact you know better. “I’ve just been focusing on school…”

“Oh, tell me, dear, do you still do those wonderful paintings? I still have that one you gifted me for my birthday before you left.”

Namjoon follows up on his mother’s question, shooting you a smile that somehow is a combination of both bashful and proud. It makes a dimple pop in his cheek. “She still has it displayed above the dining table, actually. She nearly killed me when I almost knocked it by accident a few days ago.”

Jisoo doesn’t even bat a lash, smiling at you brightly— though a bit drunkenly, if the almost-finished glass in her hand is anything to go by. You’re surprised— you know from all the dinner parties your three families held over the years that despite their petite stature and classy, ladylike countenance,  both Kim women can outdrink their husbands and your father. You wonder just how much they must have had already to have such silly grins on their faces.

“I do!” You answer, feeling your chest warm in affection. It was silly to have ever doubted it, but it made you feel somewhat eased to know that you haven’t lost your place in their lives despite your departure. “But, actually, while away I actually took up sculpting. I’ve been doing that a bit more…”

“Oh, are you talking about your works, sweetheart? Ah Jisoo, Jia— they’re absolutely wonderful! I have photos that she brought, here let me go get them—”

You feel heat flush to the tips of your ears, greeting the arrival of your mother with an embarrassed look. “Alright, let’s not bash ears about it—”

“Oh!” Jia and Jisoo perk up at your mother's exclamation, and you shrink into your seat as you watch her reach into one of the hidden pockets in her skirt and pull out a handful of small photos that you’d printed to show her. Your hubris seems to have come to nip you in the bottom. “I forgot I popped them in my pocket to show you earlier! Here, see— isn’t she just so talented? My baby girl must have been the absolute queen of her department.”

All three parents are oblivious to the way you’re shrinking into your seat in mortification, but Seokjin and Namjoon are anything but. They’re grinning at you, relishing in your discomfort much like they used to. 

“Hey, y/n, could you get us another drink? I’d go get it, but your mother actually told me earlier I wasn’t allowed in the kitchen until she’s finished with the pastries…”

You shoot him a grateful look, shooting to your feet and slipping out of the little seating area. “Yup, doing that! Getting drinks! Be right back, don’t wait up!”

Though you doubt any of the adults heard you, they didn’t wait anyway. In fact, in the time it took you to head into the kitchen and bring back three drinks on a tray, your mother has since downed her glass and has started on another topic of conversation. Thankfully, the victim is no longer you. 

“Oh, Namjoon, where are your peepers?!” Your mother gasps suddenly as you return, pointing at the man beside you. There’s the barest slur accenting her words, and you resign yourself here and now to a night of loose-lipped blabbering from both your sister and your mother. “I’m not goin’ crazy am I? You used to run into things all the time when you were a kid ‘cause you were blind as a bat!”

Namjoon winces, but Seokjin bursts into laughter. Glad for the conversational shift, you take one of the last remaining chairs and settle down, your own drink now in hand. Namjoon reaches for the refill you had brought him, using the opportunity to hide his face, and only when Jin has settled down does he manage to wipe his eyes and claim his own glass.

“I’m tryin’ out something new,” Namjoon answers after a hearty gulp, clearing his throat. He reaches to scratch the back of his neck bashfully. “Lenses, I think they’re called. They’re convenient, especially when I’m performing, but they’re expensive and so dang fragile I’m gonna need to take out insurance on them or somethin’.”

“Isn’t this your last set?” Seokjin queries knowingly, laughing as Namjoon grimaces. “Don’t worry, he’ll be back in the peepers you know and love by the end of the week. If he doesn’t break them, he loses them.”

You half expect Namjoon to be irked but he just sighs with a small smile, apparently having made peace by now with the clumsiness and two left feet that have haunted him since childhood.

Your mother decides to tease Namjoon a little more, before she changes the topic and starts gushing about their career, and how she can hardly go a day or two without hearing one of their songs on the radio. All three women are beaming with pride, and though slightly bashful about it you can see Namjoon and Seokjin’s chests swell slightly. 

Lisa, the star of today’s show, happens to walk by right when your mother is interrogating them about where they’ve chosen to settle down for the meantime, and eagerly joins the conversation.

“Ah, cool cats like you must be absolutely rolling in dough by now! How many mansions do you have already?” Lisa laughs, looking for a free seat and simply sitting on you when she doesn’t find one. She’s quite a bit heavier than you remember, and you feel your breath wheeze out of you at her abrupt drop onto your legs. 

“Unfortunately, none,” Namjoon laughs, gesturing to his mother, “Though, the pressure is on. I think ��Ma wants a nice place to retire before my career is over.”

Jisoo takes a sip to hide her sheepish grin, crossing one leg over the other and smoothing her skirt afterwards. Seokjin lets out a soft chuckle before he turns to your mother and answers the question she’d asked earlier.

“We have a sweet pad back in the fat city, actually. We both were leanin’ to the same penthouse with the best view but in the end decided to compromise and split it.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful!” you mother exclaims, eyes alight. The last time she’d looked this excited was when you told her you were staying for the whole week. “It’s so good to hear that the two of you stuck together even though you’re such big news now!”

Guilt. You bring your glass to your mouth and take a large gulp in an effort to drown it, the tart fizz of gin and tonic barely disguising the familiar curl of guilt in your gut.  Perhaps if you ignore it, it will go away. 

“Oh, speaking of— that latest record the two of you released together, it really does razz my berries like nothin’ else!” Lisa gushes, throwing a hand out to wriggle her fingers for emphasis. “It’s real hip and different from all your other tracks. Trust you two to be settin’ trends!”

Starting to get slightly tipsy now from the generous downing of your drink, you can’t help how you chime in with little thought,  “Oh, I really do love that one. It’s perfect to dance to.”

“A dance?” Lisa queries, turning to pin you with a confused look over her shoulder. You realise your slip up in that moment, when you glance to the side and see both men looking at you with unreadable expressions.  “It’s a bit slow for a dance, I think.”

“You can dance to anything,” Namjoon swoops in and unknowingly saves you, shrugging nonchalantly. The expression that was present on his face earlier is gone now, but it takes a split second longer to fade from Seokjin’s features.

Sinking into your chair as much as you can with Lisa’s weight pinning your legs down, you bring the glass to your mouth once more. 

Slip-up aside, you can only hope it won’t be as difficult to get through this party as you thought. 

 x - x - x

The day has progressed nicely and as daylight begin to bleed into night, your father emerged to help man the barbecue and dinner was served —  it was a somewhat rowdy affair, given how much alcohol the party had consumed up until that point. After eating their fill, most of your relatives and small cousins went home — they have a strict bedtime to uphold, after all. You made good on your promise to smother the little ones in kisses as they left, and it was with pink cheeks and bright grins that they bid you farewell. 

It’s getting well into the night at this point, and only a few guests are left. Lisa is inside with a cluster of her friends and her fiance, your mother and the Kims are underneath the gazebo with their husbands— this has left you by the pool with Namjoon and Seokjin. They’d gotten a little bold earlier and when you’d teased them about something, you’d had an unceremonious reunion with the pool. It was startlingly similar to what occured right before your mother took that photo hanging in your room, and made an odd mixture of affection, nostalgia, and something a little bit bittersweet settle in your abdomen. 

Just as it had the other time you’d met with the two, any tension and awkwardness had quickly melted away as the evening progressed. A few drinks in your systems and anything and everything is now water under the bridge. All too easily the three of you had fallen back into the same comfortable, playful air that you’d always known—

That you’d missed so much.

You’re lounging now in one of the rubber duck-shaped floaties your mother bought recently (she’d made you blow it up, gushing all the while about what a bargain she’d gotten on it and the companion swan floatie). Your head is more than pleasantly fuzzy, and you decide as you finish this glass that perhaps you’re done drinking for the night. You kick your legs lazily, feeling the heavy material of your skirt swish in the water as you propel yourself around the pool. Normally, the skirt is meant to come off before you take a dip. However given the nature of your entry into the pool, you hadn’t exactly had an opportunity to discard it. 

“No, no— I remember it cleary— clearly.” Seokjin waves his hand, finger pointing at Namjoon— the man in question is cackling in the deep end, falling off the swan floatie that he was attempting to climb onto. Both men are at the point in the night where they are beginning to slur their words, and to be fair you’re not much different. You’d lost count of how many times either of them have slipped up in their words.  “It wasn’t me who fell and broke y/n’s coffee table. From what I remember, it was your buttocks that hit it.”

“But you pushed me!” Any attempts on Namjoon’s behalf to hide his grin and even pretend to be angry prove to be fruitless. He has the same dumb dimpled grin on his face that you remember from your teen years. “It was uncalled for, assault!”

“You!” Seokjin’s mouth drops open, his legs kicking in the pool in his outrage. Namjoon’s eyes almost disappear as he cackles, throwing his head back. It melds into the sounds of the festivities over by the gazebo, where the radio and Lisa’s own gleeful laughter echo into the night. “y/n can confirm, it was Joon, right?!”

You put your arms behind your head, pretending to lounge back on the floatie despite how tentative your position is on the slippery rubber. “I don’t recall, suddenly I can’t think.”

“Yah!”

Your jubilant laughter means that you don’t see it when Seokjin slips completely into the pool, diving beneath the water to where you’re lounging and coming up beneath you. A scream rips from your throat as you're flipped from the floatie, tumbling backwards and into the water with a hefty splash to boot.

When you come back up, gasping breaths above the surface turning into laughter, it takes a moment for realisation to reach you through the sluggish fog in your brain that your skirt has detached. Still laughing, you catch sight of it and reach for it where it’s floating across the pool, recognising the sound of the two males guffawing behind you. When you slip on the bottom of he pool for a moment and get water up your nose, you decide that perhaps it’s time for you to call it a night soon.

“Woah, bubs, are you okay?”

When you slip again, a strong arm catches around your waist like an iron bar, holding you to the surface. Blinking the water out of your lashes, you turn to see the owner; the breath is startled out of you as your gaze meet the dark depths of Seokjin’s own. His hair is still dripping, an inky wayward mess atop his head, and the t-shirt he’d donned as he first entered the pool so long ago is clinging to each line and plane of his body. 

For a moment, yearning and a feeling all too familiar takes up the space of your lungs, and you find that you can’t breathe. 

“I think… I think it’s time to call it a night,” you manage to say, a new kind of lightheadedness emerging to addle your thoughts. You turn, breaking the hold Seokjin’s gaze has on you to seek out the edge of the pool. You feel his eyes bore holes into you for a moment longer, before two hands come to grip your waist and he moves you through the water to the rim of the pool. 

“Probably for the best,” Seokjin says, grip tightening in a split-second of warning before he heaves you up and onto the brick that lines the poolside. Off-kilter and unexpecting of the movement as you were, you have to balance yourself with your legs, which almost end up smacking Seokjin in the side. Through your inebriation, you don’t realise the way your thighs have parted in the process, the detached skirt in your hand doing little to cover you where it is laying sopping wet on the brick.  

“You’re being almost as clumsy as—” You’re also so busy trying to quell the fluttering in your stomach and find your bearings you also don’t notice the way Seokjin’s eyes move unwittingly down your form, falling to your thigh at eye-level. “...Namjoon.”

You blink, eyes finally focusing but heartbeat still thrumming in your ears.

“I don’t know if I will ever be that clumsy,” you manage to say, as comprehensible as possible. Seokjin’s hands leave your waist as you stumble to your feet, wringing out your skirt before attempting to button the drenched garment back up above your hips. 

“Hey!”

At Namjoon’s outcry, you grin and bring your hand up in a wave. 

“I’ll see you guys later,” you drunkenly promise, completely forgetting that in a few days, you’ll be out of this town and out of their lives once more. “Goodnight, you two.”

They return the sentiment, and you grab a towel from one of the poolside chairs, wrapping it around yourself and making your way back in. You miss the way that their eyes follow you as you leave their sight and reenter the warmth and light of your home.

x - x - x - x

The night has drawn to a close, and the two men have long since climbed from the pool and dried off with the fluffy towels your mother so generously laid out for them before she got too tispy. A sharp look from their own mothers reminded them earlier that there are still plates to clear and things to tidy, so despite being guests they do their best amongst the alcohol-induced fog clouding their minds to help clean up the aftermath of Lisa’s engagement party. 

As they do so, the same thing is true for both of them: there is a lot on their minds.

Seokjin had to turn to Namjoon earlier to confirm what he’d seen, and when he saw the man in question already looking at him with wide eyes, he knew he hadn’t just drunkenly imagined it. They both saw it, the glimpse of a strikingly familiar picture peeking from the inside of your thigh. They’d seen that very same tattoo in the very same place just a few nights ago, only last time the owner had remained a masked mystery. Now, they’d glimpsed the same image on the body of their childhood friend, the girl they’d both fallen in love with and subsequently drifted apart over only years ago because they were young and jealous and stupid. But, things are different now; they’re now only two of those things, and after they made up over a year ago their friendship is stronger than ever, in… more ways than one.

But despite how much has changed over the years, there is still one thing that has remained constant; and that is their feelings for you.

Truthfully, after not seeing you for so long, they had started to think perhaps they were finally getting over you. Impossible as it had seemed, considering how smitten they were. A cold realisation washed over them the second they saw you again, though, that those feelings hadn’t disappeared like they had suspected, but simply remained dormant. Seeing you at the diner and finally getting to catch up after being apart so long, missing you so much, had pretty much cemented that. When they’d returned to their hotel room after, they didn’t need to say a word and only shared a look to know they had both come to the same conclusion.

They were both irrevocably, pathetically, undoubtedly still in love with you, even after all these years. 

Then had come the show.

It was the reason they’d returned to this town, technically. An important friend of theirs had invited them both to celebrate the success of their latest record and talk about future opportunities; the location happened to be a club currently hosting a highly regarded burlesque set. They’d felt the second the final masked performer had come on stage that there was something odd, something special about her. She had used their song, on her thigh had been a tattoo that tickled something in the back of their minds, and there was something in the way she moved that had been so jarringly familiar, but neither had been able to pin where they had seen her before.

Until tonight, that is.

It hadn’t been an intentional reveal on your part, but there on your thigh had been the exact same tattoo they’d glimpsed in the club, and they’d known the second they saw it that it wasn’t a common design. At first, on the night, Seokjin thought that it might have struck them because it was drawn similarly to how you always used to doodle moons on all of your schoolbooks, and now it all made sense. 

The only thing left to consider is, what do they do now that they know?

“Oh, my boys— my precious, helpful, lovely boys!”

The two men turn in tandem, easily catching sight of your mother as she stumbles her way over to them. They were in the process of moving some of the plates to the kitchen before they heard her drunken cooing, and Seokjin finds himself thanking the heavens they’d put them down quickly because in the next second your mother is throwing her arms around them and they’re being yanked down to her height from the sheer strength of her grip.

“I missed you two, we all missed you two,” she blubbers, hugging them close like she’s worried they might slip away into the night the second she loosens her hold. A second shy of suffocating them, she finally releases her grip, and they straighten with warm faces. Namjoon knows without even having to check that he’s got a real goofy grin on his mug right now. 

“We missed you too,” Seokjin says, and he means it. Your family and Namjoon’s family are both pretty much his own at this point, and he’d found himself missing every single member while he was away. Each time he returned home, he was sure to visit the other two houses at the end of the cul-de-sac, though the times he’d been able to actually make his way back to his home town were unfortunately few and far between. The same is the case for Namjoon, as he knows, except likely a bit worse since he knows Namjoon has always been a real Mummy’s boy.

“But I doubt it was as much as we missed you!” Your mother argues, and it makes both men smile. The next few words to escape her mouth knock the expression straight off their faces, though.  “y/n especially. Oh, I remember she was so heartbroken when you three started growing apart. I think part of the reason she left was to get away from it. The way she used to talk about you boys…” Her gaze slips to the side, eyes slightly hazy in recollection. “I thought for sure that she was going to end up marrying one of you.”

They don’t even get a good second to unpack that, before the haze leaves your mother’s eyes and she is giggling, leaning forward with a cheeky glint in her eyes that they know for sure they’ve seen in your own. She brings her hand up to shield her mouth as she whispers in a voice that is not at all as quiet as she likely thinks it is, “It’s a bit improper, but I think she used to like both of you.”

Namjoon chokes on his own spit, and Seokjin’s mouth falls slack. “What?”

Your mother merely giggles, leaning back and spinning on her heel. “Thank you so much for your help, boys, but you ought to be on your way! Your mothers are about to head home and neither of them are walking in a very straight line.”

She halts, turning over her shoulder to shoot them a wide grin. “I’m glad you two came. Thank you.”

And then she is gone, and a blanket of silence falls over the kitchen. Seokjin and Namjoon turn their heads, locking gazes. 

Well, at least now they know what to do.

x — x — x

 You swear there is something odd in the air of the club this evening. 

It’s something subtle, and none of the other girls seem to have noticed it; they continue as always, tittering away in the dressing rooms and giggling amongst themselves when one of them makes a joke that probably shouldn’t be repeated outside the room. It’s the last night you will be performing here, and also the last night you will be staying. You were planning on making a quick visit home tomorrow morning to say farewell to your parents and congratulate your sister once more, before being on your way. You hadn’t decided yet whether you were going to go out of your way to track down Seokjin and Namjoon to say goodbye to them as well, but the idea of it… well, it sets your belly alight with nerves. You have no idea what you would say, and you know — you know— in your gut that doing it would revive the elephant in the room that you’ve all been ignoring up until now. 

But if you don’t, then you’ll be doing the exact same thing you did last time, and this time around you don’t know if you’ll get their forgiveness, let alone deserve it. 

By this point in the evening, you’ve already slipped into your costume and powdered your face. Since you wear a mask while on stage, you don’t really need to apply any heavy makeup around your brows and eyes; you usually settle for accentuating them naturally. 

Mina has disappeared since you last saw her, which is odd since she usually lingers to talk your ear off about any handsome faces she might spy in the crowd as the room beyond the stage begins to fill. You’d started to look for her earlier, seeking a distraction from the depressing inner monologue you have running, but hadn’t managed to find her. This means that for the past half hour or so you’ve been left to your own devices, fiddling with different parts of your dress and costume like a child twiddling their thumbs in the principal’s office. Part of that time, you spend trying to ignore the events of last night and any feelings that may have resurfaced as a result of your return to this town. For the rest of it, you attempt to think about what you’re going to do tomorrow when the rapidly-approaching hour comes when you have to leave again. God, where on earth did Mina get off to? You’re going insane here.

Oddly enough, it’s her that finds you a few minutes before the show is set to start. By this point, it’s a wonder you haven’t torn your hair out of it’s meticulous styling.

“Where did you pop off to?” you ask her before she even has a chance to say hello. She raises her brows, laughing at your rapid questioning. 

“Big boss wanted me for something,” she supplies, cocking her hip and resting a hand there. “Actually, I was asked to pass on a message to you.”

The confusion must be evident on your face, because Mina is quick to wave her hand. “Don’t worry, it’s nothing bad— though it is a bit odd. He just asked me to tell you to meet him in one of the private rooms in the VVIP section. I think it was the very last one…?”

That is odd, considering she’d apparently just come from meeting him. Private shows aren’t something you do, so you can’t think of a reason why the big boss would ask you to meet him there. 

“Huh, ok. So soon before the show…?” you ask, just to be sure. You don’t have your mask on you right now, so you need to calculate how long it’s going to take you to return and get it. Mina shrugs, nodding. 

“I suppose so. Don’t worry,” she smiles, something indecipherable yet oddly devious entering her gaze. “You won’t be there long enough to mess anything up. The show will go on, Miss Luna.”

You could almost swear there is something hidden in her words, but don’t have the time or the thought to dwell on it. Instead you return her smile and turn to be on your way; the VVIP rooms are on the other side of the establishment, and you don’t want to keep the big boss waiting. You’d only met him once, the owner of this club, and he didn’t strike you as anything in particular. The only thing you’d thought to note is that he smoked perhaps a few too many cigars, because his office was almost always filled with curling, coiling smoke that leaked into the hall  each time you moved past. But he was quite mild-mannered and polite as far as men in this business go, so you’re not particularly concerned for your wellbeing as you make your way to meet him.

It takes a little longer than anticipated, since you ran into one of your co-performers and they cornered you for help with their outfit, but finally you’re arriving in the second-floor wing that houses the VVIP rooms. Instantly, it’s evident where you are. The carpet is a little more plush, the wallpaper a little more maintained, and the hall decorated a little nicer than the rest of the place. Spotting the room on the end, you make your way down there and knock on the door thrice before grasping the handle and easing it open.

“Mr. Leigh? What did you want to t—”

The rest of your sentence dies in your throat before it even has a chance to reach the tip of your tongue, feet freezing mid-step as your eyes fall upon the occupants of the room. For once, you don’t have any sort of instinct that kicks in to save you; you simply stand and stare with wide eyes.

“Took you long enough, bubs.” Seokjin straightens from where he had been leaning back against the plush crimson leather of the circular lounge. “We were beginning to think you weren’t going to show.”

A myriad of thoughts suddenly flood the blank space in your brain, all in contention with each other. Oh no, they’ve seen you— no, you have a mask, they don’t know who you are— no, you don’t have your mask—

Dressed in your performing attire and standing before Seokjin and Namjoon, in one of the VVIP rooms in the club where they attended your show, you aren’t a faceless dancer. You’re y/n, and it feels like they can see every single bit of you there is to see.

You don’t even know where to begin.

“I…” You attempt to say something, anything, but your tongue has suddenly turned to lead in a pact with your stomach, sinking down and refusing to dance for your words.

It takes you a moment to realise as you watch them straighten, but neither of them look surprised. It leads you to believe that somehow they figured it out on their own, though you have no idea how. You don’t really have the presence of mind to ask them right now, either. In fact, it could even be argued that you’re almost panicking.

“We have a lot to talk about,” Namjoon speaks up, offering you a smile that holds neither judgement nor disdain. “We wanted to catch you before you inevitably skipped town without saying goodbye.”

That stung, just as much as the guilt that struck you for the truth of his words. You’d been contemplating it, leaning towards it even, but suddenly you feel you have to defend yourself. 

“I hadn’t decided that yet,” you say quietly. You let the door fall shut behind you, silently acquiescing to the unspoken demand weighing heavy in the air.

“Don’t lie.”

Your eyes shoot even wider, if possible, at the sound of Seokjin of all people snapping at you. His tone was sharp, and you half expect him to look furious, but when your eyes flick to his face it gives nothing away. When he continues in the next second, though, you see it in the depths of his eyes. Hurt.

“We used to tell each other everything, back then.” It could have been a trick of your mind, but you swear you heard his voice break slightly. “I don’t want that to change. So no lies tonight, y/n. We’re going to talk as adults, openly and honestly.”

For reasons beyond you, something about the promise woven through his tone makes you nervous. A tremor fights to shudder its way down your spine; for a moment, you feel akin to a small, cornered forest animal, even though they are the ones sitting against a wall and you are in the open. You don’t know what to say. 

Namjoon steps in, saving you from fumbling for a response as he always seems to do. “You don’t have to stand there, ready to bolt, you know. You can come sit down.”

You shake your head, suddenly recalling your commitments outside this room and feeling relief flood you at the realisation that you have an excuse to remove yourself from this situation you’d tried so hard to avoid. “I can’t. I have to go p—”

“We already talked it over with your boss, he was happy to take you out of the performance tonight. It’s okay, the others know too.”

You deflate, looking at Namjoon with a sinking feeling in your stomach. He doesn’t hold your attention all that long, though, before the sound of Seokjin’s voice brings your gaze to him once more.

“Why did you leave? Without even saying goodbye, or telling us where you went?” You feel rooted to the spot, pinned first by the weight of Seokjin’s gaze and then his words as they slam into you, unfiltered. 

“Hyung.” You think you hear Namjoon murmur softly, giving the man next to him a pointed look. Seokjin is unphased, looking at you expectantly, “Be honest.”

It’s just as panic begins to seep into the bottom of your lungs that anger sparks and sets it alight, transmuting it to something red and hot in your chest. 

“You want me to be honest?” you ask, heat beginning to colour your voice and sharpen the tip of your tongue. “I left because of you— both of you. I don’t know if something happened between you or if I just wasn’t enough, or you felt I was holding you back, but you drew away and you left me. You both left me before I ever left you.”

You see it the second your words enter the air like a whip, the hurt and guilt slipping across their features. Anger bubbles in your throat, stings your eyes, and urges you to let loose everything else rising to the tip of your tongue, “I left because I couldn’t handle the pain of my two best friends slowly easing themselves from my life, like— like I was old news. Like I no longer had a place in that shiny, brand new world they’d stepped into.”

More rushes to escape, feelings kept bottled up tight for three years suddenly flooding forth with the force of a tidal wave, but you bite it down, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath that rattles through your chest. When you’re sure you have a firmer grasp on your emotions, you allow yourself to speak once more. “If an apology is what you want, then I’m sorry. I’m sorry for leaving without saying goodbye. I’m sorry for my part in hurting you. But you… the two of you hurt me, too. You meant the world to me and when you pulled away you made me feel like nothing.”

Your eyes remain closed, teeth sinking into your bottom lip as you will yourself not to cry; silence sinks over the room, only broken as your ears adjust to the thin buzz of electricity thrumming through the walls. One moment, another-- you try and focus on breathing in, and breathing out.

“Something did happen between us, you know. We fought over you.”

Your head snaps up, eyes locking onto Namjoon. He stands, dusting his legs as he straightens and adjusts his jacket. Slowly, like he’s worried he will spook you, he begins to step closer. “I’m sorry, y/n. We never meant to hurt you, and didn’t realise the way our immaturity was hurting you, too. You took up such a big part of our lives, and after you left it was painfully empty… when we saw you again this week, it was the first time we’d felt whole in years.”

Stunned, you’re rooted to the spot and can only watch as he comes close enough to touch, hands reaching for your own; faintly, you register the sound of Seokjin getting up from the couch as well. When he reaches your side, you risk a glance to his face and are surprised by the soft, remorseful expression resting upon his handsome features. 

“I’m sorry, bubs, for hurting you.” He lifts a hand, the warmth of his palm cupping your cheek. “You are irreplaceable to us, and we will always want you as a part of our lives. No one meant as much to us as you did then, and no one means as much to us as you do now. The two of you are my world, and I know the same goes for Joon.”

There’s something different hiding in the depths of his tone that makes your heart patter faster against the confines of your chest, something in the way they share a look so full of something warm that your own cheeks heat in response. Both of them… with each other, too? 

 “Why are you saying this?” Now, you meant to tack on. Why is he saying this now?

Namjoon’s eyes are warm as they meet your own. “Because we should have said it three years ago. Plus… we got a tip from an anonymous source that our feelings aren’t as unrequited as we once thought.” 

You don’t even need to wonder who it was that could have exposed such a thing; your mother had been mysteriously avoidant of your gaze this morning, almost knocking a few things off the bench in the extent of her effort to evade meeting your eyes.

“If nothing else, please just tell us before you go,” Seokjin implores, voice a low murmur. “Whether it was true then, or....”

You have a feeling you know what he was going to say: or even now. You’d known it the second you glimpsed them back in this town that those feelings you’d harboured for years and years weren’t ever going away. Even seeing them a handful of times has made your heart ache with the revival of your love and the magnitude at which it had bloomed once more in the tender soil of your being. The words rush to the tip of your tongue, but even now when the two objects of your affection have all but confessed to you, fear barrs them from leaving your mouth. Because it’s not appropriate, a voice murmurs it’s familiar tune, It’s so unlikely— what if you are just reading too much into it and are mistaken?

Honesty, Seokjin had requested. You take a deep breath before admitting the words that will seal your fate, for better or for worse.

“I did love you, then,” you say, catching it as they both seem to tense. “I should have known better than to think those feelings would just go away.”

It takes a moment, but soon both men are erupting into bright grins. In his glee, Namjoon folds you into his arms, smacking a soft kiss to your forehead, your cheek, and finally your lips— the suddenness of the action brings a gasp to your lips, but you’re definitely not going to complain. Especially not when the way his mouth moves against yours lights something bright deep within you. 

You don’t get to enjoy the sensations for longer than a moment before Seokjin’s voice is parting the air, a completely different tone underlying his words than what you expect from seeing his stupid grin earlier.

“Ah-ah-ah, don’t think you’re off the hook just yet, little miss. “ You meet his gaze over Namjoon’s shoulder and a shudder shoots down your spine at the look in his eyes. “We have a lot of lost time to make up for, wouldn’t you say?” 

x - x 

Barely ten minutes and a private car ride filled with scandalous touches and even more scandalous noises later, you’re being pressed against the wall in the bedroom of the penthouse suite in the most expensive hotel your town has to offer. Namjoon’s mouth is on yours with a kiss so impassioned that it pulls the air from your lungs and the strength from your knees; you don’t even realise that the lights hadn’t already been on when you entered and it was Jin responsible for illuminating your path into the suite.

A part of you expects some internal resistance — it had been three years since you’d last seen them, before this week — but instead you’re simply overwhelmed with how right it feels. Soft, fluttery warmth like sun rays on a winter’s morning fills you up to the brim, the feeling so foreign you’re worried your heart might actually burst. 

Namjoon’s hands come to your hips, pressing them to the wall before sliding up to the dip of your waist. He isn’t overly bold in the way he moves his mouth against yours, but it makes a whine build in your chest nonetheless. A part of you disagrees with it, and when you recall that you’re still here dressed in the costume that usually gives you the power over men, you push back and turn the two of you around. 

When his own back meets the wall, the softest gasp escapes Namjoon’s mouth and you swallow it down, your hands coming to cup his jaw. You take the lead in the kiss and he doesn’t put up a fight, grip tightening on your sides as he holds you closer. 

“Ah-ah, bubs.”

An unwitting squeak escapes you as two large hands find purchase on your waist and you’re pulled apart from the man panting against the wall. You blink and before you know it Seokjin has you falling onto something so plush and soft you know immediately it’s a bed. Your eyes are quick to find Seokjin’s, and the raven-haired male shoots you a stern look that is only contradicted by the heady mixture of affection and lust in his gaze.

“You don’t get to call the shots tonight,” he informs you simply, striding closer to where you’re laying on the bed and tugging on the string that holds your silken gown together. It’s designed to come undone, and so it’s no surprise that at the lightest pull the silk is sliding off your body, revealing the outfit you’d paraded on the stage before them barely a few nights ago. Faintly, you register the bed dipping behind you, but your attention is otherwise occupied when Seokjin reaches for the bedside table and retrieves something long and black. 

“Her wrists?” Namjoon asks, unknowingly answering the question you had forming in your head. Seokjin nods, tossing the tie  to him. Your gown is slipped from your shoulders completely, sheer petticoat ruffling as you’re scooted backwards until you feel the firmness of Namjoon’s chest against your back and Seokjin is sliding between your legs, in the midst of unbuttoning his shirt. 

“Do you know what you did to us when we saw you that night?” Seokjin asks, voice smooth as honey. It’s a struggle to remain focused on his words when Namjoon brings your hands together in front of you where you’re propped against him, beginning to bind them a little too expertly with the tie Seokjin had passed him. Your heart beats a little faster, thighs trembling as heady anticipation whirls within you. “What you do to us?”

“Just seeing you was already dangerous enough,” Namjoon murmurs, husky tone brushing the shell of your ear. “But you danced to our song, the song we wrote for you. It’s like you knew what it would do to us…”

It makes something swell in your chest, the confirmation that they had written that song for you. You catch something fond flick through Seokjin’s gaze before he tuts, shaking his head. He pushes your now-tied hands up and over your head, back until you feel the side of your thumbs grazing the back of Namjoon’s neck. Lips brush your neck, eliciting a shiver that Seokjin eagerly drinks in. Long, deft fingers work to undo the top part of your corset, the cushioned bandeau, and slip it from your form. You can visibly see it as his eyes darken, drinking in the sheer bralette barely supporting your breasts. You also know the second he glimpses the tassels pressed beneath, because his teeth sink into his lip and he takes in a sharp breath. 

Namjoon’s wandering hands come to trace the underside of your chest, breath catching in your throat when he takes their weight into his hold and kneads. Warmth shoots to your core, the hints of pleasure curling your toes. You feel breathless as they work in easy tandem, Seokjin slipping your petticoat over your legs and Namjoon removing your bralette. You shiver once your chest is bare, not from the cold but from the intensity and the weight of their gazes as you feel them fall upon you. 

“Leave her corset,” Seokjin instructs, flicking one of your tassels and eliciting a yelp. He settles back further between your legs, wrapping his arms around your thighs; his gazes falls upon the tattoo on the inside of your leg and the corner of his lips curls up. 

The plush of his lips presses against the sensitive skin of your inner thigh, the sensation tingling along your nerves. He doesn’t comment on the picture, but when his mouth touches where it is inked into your skin you feel your heart skip a beat nonetheless. 

Your mind is pulled from the sensation of fingers slipping beneath the edge of your panties when Namjoon’s fingers play with the tassels attached to your nipples, tugging and pulling and eliciting all sorts of heady sensations that make your thighs shake. “Joon,” you breathe, something else resting on the tip of your tongue only to be replaced with a whine when Namjoon pulls a little harder, soft open-mouthed kisses pressed to the sensitive column of your neck.

It’s like all of your nerves are alight at once, each touch and brush of their skin against yours heightened and making your heart race and your breath come a little quicker. Seokijn quickly slips your panties off, but leaves the pantyhose and garter belt. His eyes drag a trail of heat up your body, halting where Namjoon has begun to suck marks onto your neck like an artist decorating a canvas. For a moment he is mesmerised, and you can’t help the words that slip from your lips.

“You like what you see?” You ask, curving your back ever so slightly to emphasise your position. Seokjin pins you with an unreadable look, jaw ticking for a moment. 

“Very much so,” he answers, pulling away from you for a moment. He reaches behind him, retrieving something you hadn’t even noticed before now, and when you realise what it is he has in his hand you feel your stomach simultaneously drop and flip in excitement. His eyes meet yours for a moment, an unspoken question whether what he is about to do is okay, and had it been anyone else you know you would have refused, but you trust him. You trust them. You offer him a small nod and you receive the smallest smile in return before he is bringing the camera up to his eye and lining up his shot. 

Flash. Click. The camera isn’t as bulky as you’re used to, and you figure it must be one of the newer models you are far too poor to afford. One picture seems to be enough for him for now, but you know as he places it well to the side that it won’t be the only appearance it makes tonight. 

“Just in case you decide to fly the coop on us again,” he says, a sly look on his face. You scoff, knowing that he’s joking, and hold up your hands, still bound. 

“Like this? Not likely.”

He chuckles, and you feel Namjoon’s chest rumble with a soft laugh against your back as well. The lighthearted moment is over as quick as it arrives as Seokjin settles back between your legs and hardly waits for you to orient yourself before dipping his head down and delivering a broad swipe of his tongue up your slit.

“F— Jin!” you yelp at the sudden shock of pleasure, wriggling in Namjoon’s arms slightly; he nips at your skin in light reprimand, and Seokjin lifts his head only for a moment to scold you with a cheeky gleam in his eyes.

“Careful now, bubs,” he cautions, delivering a small kitten lick to your clit between utterances. “We might have the penthouse but there are still people below us.”

Surprisingly— or perhaps unsurprisingly, when taking the rest of your life and profession into account — the idea of being heard has the opposite effect on you than one might expect. You bite your lip, tipping your head back as Namjoon’s fingers begin to play with you once more and Seokjin begins to bury his face between your legs in earnest. 

It gives you a bit of whiplash, when you think about it; you don’t think you ever would have expected to end up here, in this situation. Crushes or no crushes, you hadn’t even expected to see them again let alone become the meat in a famous musician sandwich. 

It’s almost shameful how quickly the heat and pressure builds within you, Namjoon managing to tug the tassels off completely to roll your flushed buds between his fingers. The noises that sound from Seokjin’s ministrations between your legs are so downright lewd you can feel your face flush with heat, your thighs trembling either side of his head. You attempt to keep your own moans and whines in until Seokjin delivers a smack to your thigh and sends you a warning look. 

Just when you think you might be about to reach your peak, Seokjin stops, pulling back and licking your cream from his lips. The look you send him must be devastated, because he looks absolutely smug. 

“Now, this isn’t just about you,” Seokjin says, carding a hand through his hair before he finishes undoing his shirt and slips it from his form. Your breath catches at the sight of his sculpted torso, and the ink that decorates it in pretty splotches of imagery. You feel so ridiculously naughty, finding the tattoos on him as attractive as you do, and you’re aware of the irony but you just can’t help it. Seokjin could manage to make a potato sack look good. “Hasn’t Joonie been good? Been making you feel so good, with nothing in return? I think we should pay him back.”

It’s all the warning you get before you’re flipped over, braced on your elbows and knees. There is rustling before something plush is slipped beneath you, and Seokjin lowers you down between Namjoon’s legs with the pillow propping your hips up for him to continue where he left off.

Dazed from the sudden shift and beginning to lose yourself to the feeling as Seokjin returns his mouth to your soaked centre, you tilt to meet Namjoon’s dark gaze and offer him a brief smile. You can’t deny, the angle you’re viewing him from is nice, especially as he wrangles his shirt off and you catch glimpses of firm abs and chest. Namjoon, too, has decorated his skin, and it’s somewhat ridiculous how viscerally you’re reacting to it but you really think you might be about to drool. 

The pleasure quickly beginning to build in you once more from Seokjin’s plush lips and agile tongue leaves you no room for pleasantries, “Can I suck you off, Joonie?”

You hear his breath catch before he tips his head back and lets out a soft groan. “Do you even have to ask?”

His response only fuels your eagerness, mouth beginning to feel empty when your face is so close to his crotch you can feel the heat of his body. Considering the state of your hands, Namjoon makes quick work of his belt and slacks for you, shimmying them down with his briefs just enough to let his member spring free, almost completely hard at this point. 

“Holy shoot, Joon,” you curse, eyes wide with a mixture of shock and lust. God, you don’t think you’ve ever wanted anyone as much as you want these two men.  Namjoon shoots you a cheeky, if somewhat dazed, smile that makes his dimples pop out.

“It’s not just me you have to worry about.”

Well that’s a condemning statement if you ever did hear one, considering how you’re hoping this night will go. One of the more open and liberal girls that worked the show with you had once said “god gave me two holes for a reason, girls!” and right now you find you couldn’t agree more. 

You’re sick of your mouth being empty, you decide, and so you forego further foreplay and simply reach for his cock, taking the length into your hands and promptly enveloping his tip in the heat of your mouth.

“Fuck!” Namjoon swears loudly, thighs tensing against your shoulders. The yelp that escapes you as Seokjin smacks your ass melts into a moan that elicits a throaty noise from Namjoon, as well. 

You press and drag your tongue along the underside of his length, gradually working your mouth lower and lower until your nose is brushing the dark patch of curls across his pubic bone, a surprisingly pleasant mixture of musk melding with his cologne and brushing your senses . Even without the pleasure flooding your nerves from Seokjin’s tongue and the way he latches his lips around your clit, the deep, throaty noises tumbling from Namjoon’s mouth are reward enough. Since your hands are bound, your mouth has to do most of the work; when you sink down enough that his tip bumps the back of your throat, you do your best to fight your gag reflex from kicking in fully. 

Namjoon swears once more, just barely stopping himself before it gets too reminiscent of a sailor’s vocabulary. The sensation of your throat constricting around the head of his member makes his hips twitch and buck up ever so slightly, his hands winding into the hair at the nape of your neck. Struggling to keep on task through the haze in your mind, you do your best to build up a rhythm that has Namjoon’s abdomen trembling from the effort of keeping his hips still.

In tandem, the two of you seem to be rapidly approaching your highs— unfortunately for you, that same attention to detail that makes Jin’s ministrations so mind-numbingly good is what alerts him to that fact. Right when you feel yourself tense up in the prelude to your orgasm, Seokjin rips his mouth away, the bed shifting behind you. “Not yet, bubs.”

You can’t help the whine that sounds from your throat, the vibrations making Namjoon jerk.

“Fuck, I’m—”

Flash. Click. 

Another whine, different in tone this time, escapes you at the knowledge that Seokjin has added another filthy memory to his collection. 

“Joonie, you better not cum until I say so. y/n, off.”

Namjoons nails scratch lightly against your scalp, almost making your eyes roll back as he whines lowly in protest. You know you should listen and do as Seokjin says, but you can’t help but push a little, taking your sweet time as you pull your mouth slowly from Namjoon’s length, sucking all the while. The noises that tumble from Namjoon’s mouth as a result are incriminating enough, and even though you knew Seokjin wasn’t going to let it slide it still comes as a surprise when there is a sharp, painful smack against the globe of your ass. It’s hard enough and loud enough that your back arches slightly, mouth leaving Namjoon with a pop so you’re free to cry out. 

“Jin!”

Seokjin’s hand is cool against the smarting flesh of your behind as he rubs soothingly over it, raising an eyebrow as you meet his gaze over your shoulder. “I told you off, bubs. Let’s not make me repeat myself.”

Somewhat petulant despite the giddy butterflies in the pit of your stomach, you allow him to grab you by the hips and yank you back with a pout, breathless with anticipation when you feel his fingers drag over the dips and curves of your body as though mapping them out. He makes you sit up, your back against his chest as he explores your front, drinking in each gasp and whine as he pinches and tugs your nipples and rolls them between the pads of his fingers. Down, down, down he goes— when his finger drags along your slit and slips over your swollen clit you cry out, unable to help the unwitting buck of your hips. 

“After all the effort I went to to clean you up, you’ve gone and made a mess again,” Seokjin murmurs, pillowy lips brushing the edge of your ear. You quiver in his hold as he rolls a lazy circle around your bud, thighs threatening to close around his hand. You’re suddenly aware of how empty you feel, surprised that you’ve almost orgasmed twice without even being penetrated. 

You try and cant your hips up, not above whining and begging at this point— if he denies you your high one more time you just might go insane. “Please, Jin, please—”

Namjoon, who had taken a moment to recover after almost blowing his load earlier, shifts forward on the bed to join the two of you. His lips find your neck, your jaw, until they finally meet your lips once more and he swallows your sinful noises down. 

“What, you want more? You want my fingers? Look at you. You want to be filled so badly you’re willing to rock against anything with a pulse...”

Heat flushes up your neck to your cheeks, Namjoon’s kiss muffling your whine; you hadn’t thought you would be one to fancy this sort of thing, but if the wetness gushing forth at his words is anything to go by then apparently you do. 

Namjoon parts from your lips, waiting until your eyes focus on him so that he can hold your gaze. “Baby girl,” he murmurs, voice rough. His hand slips down to join Seokjin’s, finger dipping ever so slightly into your slit. The true meaning of his question isn’t lost on you.  “Who do you want?”

You feel almost unhinged with how much raw, restless desire is coursing through you right now— you couldn’t have stopped your answer even if you’d wanted to. “Both… both of you…”

There is a moment of silence following your response, but you don’t have time to wonder whether you said the wrong thing. In the next second Seokjin is swearing lowly under his breath, pressing his lips to your throat to hide his groan.

“Joonie, bedside table. You’ll have to prepare her.”

You’ve never seen Namjoon move as fast as he did the second Seokjin spoke, flying from the bed; he’s back within seconds after retrieving something from the drawers to the side, placing them on the covers. A small rectangular tin and a slim bottle. 

When he sits, waiting eagerly with his cock still flushed and hard and bobbing from the movement, Seokjin turns you around in an abridged version of the way you were before. Taking note of the uncomfortable angle of your arms, he undoes the tie, but doesn’t discard it after slipping it from the reddened skin of your wrists.

With your ass now pointed in Namjoon’s direction, it isn’t long before his hands find purchase and your most intimate area is revealed to him.

“Fuck,” he swears, “You’re so wet, baby. We might not even need the extra help, hyung.”

“Use it just in case,” Seokjin instructs, before turning his attention to you. “Now, if you want to cum later I think you should earn it now, hm?”

Your hands were already moving towards his belt and fly before he’d started talking, but his words renew your vigour. When you free Seokjin’s crotch from the confines of his slacks and briefs, you quickly understand just what Namjoon meant earlier. Namjoon has length, but Seokjin is thick. You wrap your hands around him and can’t help but marvel at his size— you’re a little ashamed of how excited it makes you.

“Ah!” Your plans to engulf Seokjin’s cock in the heat of your mouth are interrupted by a sensation at your rear. You wiggle slightly, unable to help it. “That’s cold!”

Namjoon places a featherlight kiss to your cheek, thick, slippery finger beginning to ease into your hole now that it is sufficiently lubricated. Suddenly aware that your attention is in the wrong place, you do your best to hurry back to what you were doing before you earn yourself another smack. 

“Perfect, bubs.” The groan that rumbles from Seokjin’s throat in praise is so raspy and low that it makes a shiver roll down your spine. As teasingly as you dare, you’re suckling around the flushed head of his cock, feeling it twitch and throb in your hands in response. It’s already a tight fit in your mouth, you can feel your thighs quaking in anticipation as you imagine what it would feel like filling you up. The thought takes you by surprise.

Since when did you start thinking like such a wanton whore?!

Well, you suppose, there is no time like the present. 

Seokjin’s hand threads through your hair, his hips rocking ever so slightly; you watch the way the muscles in his abdomen undulate at the movement and fight to keep your saliva in your mouth as you begin to bob your head down his length. Considering his girth, it’s hard to keep your teeth tucked behind your lips, but you somehow manage; when the time comes that he reaches your throat you’re in a better condition than you were earlier for it, but it’s still a bit of a shock to the system.

“Oh my god,” Seokjin’s thighs quake for the slightest second against you. “Fuck. No wonder Joonie almost blew his load. Look at you. You do this often, huh? Look how well you swallow my cock…”

You moan around him, his words and the oddly pleasant sensation of Namjoon working his fingers in and out of your asshole melding into a pool of heat in your abdomen.  Your eyes flutter closed as you try to focus on making Seokjin feel good, and you’re only distracted by a muted flash behind your eyelids.

Click.

Another shot saved. You take Seokjin further into your mouth, trying to go as far back as you can without gagging. He doesn’t seem to mind the way your throat constricts around his length though, if the noises escaping his plush lips where they part are anything to go by. Namjoon gradually adds one finger after another, making sure you’re accustomed to the stretch at least a little before the next joins. By the time he has squeezed in three fingers and scissored them a few times, you find yourself shaking a bit from the sensations. It’s odd, different to what you’re used to, but oh even with the light burn that accompanies each finger it still feels so good. 

You’re so focused on the sensations that you don’t even realise the attention you’ve been giving Seokjin has strayed, lips sucking a little harder and your hand stroking a little tighter. The salty taste of precum coats your tongue and you have half a mind to be ashamed of the way it makes you long for more. It proves to be a little too much for Seokjin at once, though. His hand tightens in your hair, pulling you gently off of him as he struggles to catch his breath.

“Not yet, bubs,” he says, voice rough. His eyes are like magnetic pools as they draw you into their depths, their hold only broken when Namjoon slips a final finger in and you shut your eyes on instinct, mouth dropping open at the sensation. 

“Are you ready, baby?” 

Namjoon’s voice makes your stomach flip, his free hand smoothing over the curve of your ass. You find yourself nodding before you even have the thought to do so, and with that Namjoon shifts on the bed behind you. Seokjin helps you move backwards, your eyes trained on his length somewhat longingly. There is the sound of something tearing softly behind you and you find yourself thankful that they took the initiative and you don’t have to ask them about protection.

You’re moved so that you’re straddling Namjoon’s hips with your back to him, still facing Seokjin. The two of them have since discarded their slacks and briefs  and are now presenting themselves in all their naked glory. Namjoon mutters a tender warning, informing you it might burn a bit, and you’ve heard of that but aren’t about to turn tail when you also know it’s going to feel so good after. You feel his tip press against your ass, alarmingly bigger than his fingers, and Seokjin helps ease you down slowly, inch by inch, with a firm grasp on your hips. 

True to the warning you’d received, it does burn; Namjoon had made sure there was more than enough lubrication for an easy glide, though, and by the time he has seated himself fully in you, you’re making noises you don’t think you ever have before. The line between heady pleasure and light pain is so blurred that you’re worried you might have fried your nerves at some point tonight. 

“Oh—” you take in a shuddering breath, shifting your hips ever so slightly and moaning in tandem with the man beneath you. “Joon…”

“Ride him,” Seokjin instructs, hands leaving your hips to reach for his camera once more. “Let’s make him feel good, hm?”

Who are you to say no? 

You pride yourself on having a lot of strength in your limbs, thighs especially, but still they tremble as you roll your hips up until just the tip of Namjoon’s cock remains in you, and then ease back onto him again. It takes a second before you realise the low moan you hear is coming from you, mind so addled with pleasure at this point you almost feel like you’re floating. Bracing yourself on your thighs, you do your best to set a rhythm and maintain it, ignoring the fatigue of your muscles and focusing on how good it feels and the noises tumbling from the man beneath you. 

When there is a sly touch against your swollen clit, you cry out loudly— Namjoon almost shouts at the way you clench around him, his hands flying to your hips to hold you in place for a moment. You look to Seokjin with wide eyes, panting slightly.

“Didn’t you wanna cum so badly, earlier?” he queries, fingers slipping down to slide through the slick mess around your entrance. You moan as he easily sinks two fingers in, pumping lightly. “Don’t stop, fuck yourself on my fingers, bubs.”

It feels so good you think you might tear up; obediently, you resume the pace you set earlier, now riding both Namjoon’s length and Seokjin’s digits. Each time you sink down he curls them, and you don’t know how much longer you can keep this out before your legs become too akin to  jelly to support you.

The answer is: not much longer. Seokjin quickly grows tired of it when your movements slow, thighs trembling from the effort. With a hand to your stomach he pushes you back, shifting your legs so they’re folded with your feet flat against the covers. You scramble for purchase, Namjoon quickly supporting you from behind. 

Seokjin tuts, muttering playfully about having to do everything himself, and it’s all the warning you get before he adds another digit and begins to finger your sopping entrance so hard and good that for a moment your vision goes white.

“S-Seokjin!” you drop your head back, nails sinking into the bedding as he begins to curl his fingers into that delicious spot inside of you with each pump. You had been slowly but steadily climbing back up to the precipice of your orgasm earlier, but now you’re heading there at breakneck speed. Before you know it the coil of pressure is snapping inside you and you’re shaking, pleasure numbing your limbs and making you whine.

By the time your high fades and you tune back in to the moment, you quickly become aware of two things— one, that you’ve somehow managed to coat Seokjin’s whole arm in your fluids, and two, that Namjoon has gone so tense and still beneath you that you think you might have almost killed him.

“Good girl,” Seokjin praises, sucking your cream off the tip of his fingers before wiping the remaining excess on your thigh so he can reach for his own rubber. “Do you need me to wait another moment?”

Assessing your current state, you find yourself shaking your head. You might have thought you would be too sensitive to continue, but Namjoon is still fully seated in your ass and now your pussy feels too empty for you to bear. Seokjin is only too happy to fill that void. 

Nestled between your legs, when he lines his cock up at your entrance and begins to slide in, you all but lose the ability to think. You clench unintentionally from the sensation of being filled so completely, making both men groan and Seokjin halt in his movements. He waits until you relax again before continuing his motion. 

When both men are fully sheathed inside you, you think this really might be what bliss is. Soft, panting whines and moans tumble freely from your throat as Seokjin pushes your thighs to your chest and begins to set a mind-numbing pace. It’s borderline brutal, the way he slams into you and splits you open so hard and good; each time his hips hit home you feel your whole body jostle.

“You can move, Joonie,” Seokjin somehow manages to articulate, sweat beginning to bead across his forehead and dampen the strands falling over it. You don’t know how he can talk, because you know if you tried at this moment you’d likely end up biting off your tongue. 

You feel Namjoon shake his head, hair brushing the space between your shoulder blades. “‘m close,” he mumbles in explanation, a short moan following his words. “Wanna cum together.”

It’s such a sweet desire in the midst of such a lewd situation that you almost get whiplash between the swelling of your heart and the pleasurable ache filling your insides. You feel that he will get his wish soon, because despite your recent high you’re already well on your way to reaching it again— Seokjin’s hips have begun to stutter, too, and you know he isn’t far behind. 

It all reaches its peak when Seokjin slips his hand down, following the angle of your hip bone to your core and rolling your bud with his thumb. It proves to be too much for you, because in the next moment you’re letting out a loud train of expletives and clenching tightly around them as pleasure floods your system once more, mind absolutely blank. The tightness of your heat around them is their undoing and barely a moment after you reach your high they follow suit, the sounds tumbling from them borderline sinful against your ears. 

It takes a bit longer for you to come back to earth, this time. By the time you do, Namjoon is winding his arms around your waist and rolling to the side, taking you and Seokjin with him. You let out a noise of surprise that curls into a laugh, hands gripping his arms as you hit the bed; both men are still inside you, and while you secretly wish it could stay that way for a bit longer, you know you should probably clean up. 

“No,” Namjoon says before you even go to move, a pout in his tone as he buries his face in the back of your neck. Seokjin nestles closer, pressing his lips to the hollow of your throat. “Stay, just a bit longer.”

That’s a dangerous request, especially considering the way your eyelids are beginning to feel heavy after the events of the night. For them, too, you can hear the way their breathing has already begun to even out. You couldn’t be mad if you tried, though, because just being here in their arms feels so right that you don’t ever want to feel anything else. 

“I guess we can nap…” you say, sounding tired enough that it elicits a chuckle from Seokjin. You let your eyes close, nestling your cheek against the top of Seokjin’s head and enjoying the light scent of his shampoo and cologne. You let out one last warning before you let yourself fall into the abyss, though. Just so they know who’s boss.

“If I see those photos anywhere near my house, Seokjin, it won’t just be me getting disowned.”

The laughter that tumbles forth in response just adds to the warmth flooding your being, and you let yourself relax, contented and truly happy for the first time in three years. 

[phoenotopia]

The Last Phoenotopia Blog Update

(Date 2021 MAR 01)

I debated how to open this blog post, but perhaps the main crux of this blog post is the best place to start. The blog is being retired.

The purpose of this blog was to be a "development" blog for Phoenotopia, and well, Phoenotopia's development is done. I'll still be doing bug fixes and maintenance on the PC and Switch versions, and playstation and xbox ports are underway (by a publisher). But I'm not going to be making any more major changes to the game. At some point, you put the paintbrush down and say it's done. Blemishes and all.

Recent Events

The game launched on Steam last month, and like any launch, it was hectic. Bugs Galore. This is our first commercial PC launch, so it was a real baptism by fire. Unlike Switch's one configuration, the PC has multiple configurations and factors to account for. The game needed to be able to handle multiple control schemes, screen resolutions, refresh rates, and more! I had a 60Hz monitor going into launch and didn't know anything about Hz (I do now). There was a troublesome stutter that some players were sensitive to that my whole team didn't notice since our eyes compensated it away. There were a few times where in fixing something at one party's behest, it introduced problems for another party. A few times, due to disorganization, I unwittingly rolled back a fix that was meant to be applied. For some, the game couldn't play at all (really glad Steam allows refunds).

It was messy. It was tiring. I.AM.BEAT.

I think the worst of it is over... I'll still be around to do the last updates and bug fixes, but I'm ultimately ready for what's next.

SO what is next?

What isn't next... is Phoenotopia 2. As you may have heard down the grapevine, the game couldn't be what you call successful. No one's earned even minimum wage on it.

Maybe there's hope in the game's long tail. A year or two down the line... maybe. I won't hold my breath though. At some point in the past few months, I finished processing (or grieving) and it's time to move on.

The game has at least earned enough for us to continue our modest operations. As long as we don't expand the team, and we don't take another monster six-year dev cycle like what Phoenotopia took, we can continue. We'll have to be smarter and faster. Perhaps the most valuable thing we gained from all this is experience.

The Experience

It is a dev blog. Here are some of the lessons I've accumulated from this game's development.

- Have a good menu design. Menus aren't just that in-between fluff before you get to the good stuff. Menus are KEY. Your menus need to be robust, expandable, and *understandable* (to you, the developer). Because once the game's out, you will invariably be asked to add more options. And if your menu design is bad, every time you have to add a new menu option, it becomes a whole new pain all over again. Support mouse from the get-go, etc.

- Focus on features that people will actually care about. For instance, I've never seen anyone praise the camera's zoom feature. In practice, people try that feature a few times and then never use it again. But that feature was a constant consideration factor for every level. Run through it multiple times to make sure the level didn't break, think about which zoom levels made sense, resize rooms because they worked at one zoom level but not the other, and so on.

- Don't do boxes that you can move around. Other 2D platformers avoid movable boxes because they're a huge headache to program and they really complicate the game space. Enemies need to respond to boxes you throw in their path and either navigate around or attack it. When you're moving the box, you have to worry about constantly changing your collision size and reconciling when the box gets snagged on the environment. The boxes were also a constant source of bugs because people can manipulate them to soft-lock themselves and more.

- More focused script. Phoenotopia's 100,000+ word script was panned more for being bloated than it was praised for being lengthy. Long scripts take a long time to write and make the game more unwieldy, increasing the costs of translation and upkeep. Every update we're addressing some textual error or mistranslation. There are some highly renowned games (e.g. Hyper Light Drifter) that do without a script at all!

- Be flashy! A bat and a lightsaber take the same amount of work to program, but the lightsaber will draw a lot more attention and interest.

- Slopes, surprisingly! Six years ago when I started, Unity was ill-equipped for 2D games. If you used the physics that Unity provided you'd have a really floaty character that wouldn't adhere to the slope when going downhill. There were a hundred different tutorials saying different things (use forces, use move position, use translation, etc). You can get rectangular collisions done in a day, but to do slopes took weeks. Meanwhile, games can actually get by fine without slopes. Most people won't even notice. Did you know the Phoenotopia flash game didn't have slopes? Neither does Hollow Knight or Rogue Legacy. You can save yourself a lot of work by avoiding slopes.

(big entities look weird on slopes. Bad slope!)

I could write enough little knowledge nuggets like this to fill a book! But I'd rather just make the next game. 

So… what IS next?

As mentioned previously, it's not Phoenotopia 2. Pirate and I are mostly just tossing some ideas back and forth right now. We'll go silent for a year (or two). Our next game's scope will be more modest in some ways, more ambitious in others. It will definitely be more smartly designed. (There will be a map!)

We'll announce it when it's ready for the public. It might be necessary for us to do a kickstarter. I've tried to avoid kickstarters having been burnt on quite a few myself and also because I worry that mismanaging a kickstarter would earn the ire of backers.

But I did keep this blog regularly updated for six years. So I've gained some confidence in my abilities to at least manage a kickstarter well.

Is it really the last Phoenotopia Blog update though?

Okay, not really. There is some news that I'll need to announce, and this blog is one of the game's main outreach channels. Here are the events that will cause me to update the blog:

Announcing the launch of the xbox/playstation ports when they're ready

If a physical edition of the game happens

If a new language is getting introduced into the game (Korean is a high possibility)

When we're ready to talk about our next game

If (BIG IF) we begin development on a Phoenotopia sequel. I do want to do a sequel one day if we have the means and the demand is there. 

Those updates will be more on a "when they happen" basis, rather than me reporting in every couple months.

Fan Art

As always, I'm very happy to see fanart of Phoenotopia. Major thanks again to Pimez for collecting all the artwork from the corners of the internet! Since this is the "last" blogpost, Sir Pimez can finally take a rest from collecting the fanart :P

ÆV made a series of pictures that tell a story. A Pooki is humanely sheared of its wool to create a hat. The Pooki is unharmed. Nice! Gotta love Gail’s expressions.

Amagoo Mazeru makes a stunning landscape shot of a full moon and shooting stars. It’s a sharp and clear vector art. I like the faint glow of the moon and the fire and the subtle gradient in the night sky. Very skillfully done!

Hah hah. I got a chuckle out of this one. I imagine this is how Gail's enemies see her by the end of the game. CaESar made this image based on TerminalMontage's famous youtube videos. Nailed it!

CrownStar drew two pictures of Gail. I'm a big player of JRPGs, so the first shot instantly reminded me of Persona 4's art style. (Hmmm... Phoeonotopia as a JRPG... there’s potential there...) Next, Birdy is shown carried off after her defeat. I really like Birdy's expression here - she just seems mildly uncomfortable.

There's a bit of a story behind the first image. As Firanka shares it, she wasn't able to defeat the Big Eye monster at the end of the flash game, so she believed a tall tale that what awaited after was a 6 armed Kobold boss. Hilarious! The second is a rendition of the lonely Anuri elder. A rare subject. The loneliness is portrayed well here. I feel lonely just looking at it!

Koo_chop draws the clash between Gail and Katash at the top of the towers. I really like this interpretation of the game's art style. It’s faithful to the in-game graphics. And the lighting, from the glow of Gail's bat, to Katash's sword, and the lightning in the background... Amazing!

Lime Hazard shows Gail with a salute pose. Very appropriate for this occasion. I also like how there's a slight tilt in the angle that Gail is portrayed. Those dynamic angles are always hard to get right, and Lime Hazard pulled it off very skillfully. See you next mission!

Lyoung0J with a digital painting of Gail posed sitting on a rock. I like how it almost seems like she was caught in a candid moment - she’s smiling, but also feeling self-conscious. Cute! The art style really pops, and I like how Gail is sporting what I call the old anime style nose. 

MyUesrNameIsSh*t with a sketch of Gail performing a skillful slingshot. I like how Gail is depicted with her tongue out in a mischievous manner, the way all mischievous people with slingshots do.

Niitsu Kentaro returns with a 2021 Happy New Year picture. That happened didn't it? A New Year... Gail's pose gave me a chuckle with how she seems to be waving the bat around as casually as one would wave hello. And "Phoenotopiyear"... Well said! One day we'll have our Phoenotopiyear...

Ochan Nu breaks all records with a stunning NINE pictures in one session :O

There's so many goodies here. My favorite would be the one with Gail staring intently at the screen - it's like she's looking directly at you. You almost feel uncomfortable.

Next, there's an Animal Crossing villager dressed as Gail and sporting her pink hair. It even looks like a house Gail would live in. Gail is a connoisseur of the arts and likes Mona Lisa. Yes :)

There are various comics of Gail pointing out Gail's weird food habits. A picture of Fran looking really cool, and even Gail rocking a bathing suit. (bathing suit image linked here in case NSFW). Wow!

Pimez didn't just collect the arts, he creates them as well! This one, which he aptly named 'The Year 175' is a depiction of when the dragons invaded the towers as told by an elderly Daean woman. Great pixeling skills! I got a good chuckle from the ice dragon leaving with its stuff slung over its shoulder.

Quo made a stunning picture of Gail playing the flute surrounded by the 5 musical notes and the Phoenix logo behind her. The theme seems to be "fire" and it works really well. Gail herself looks awesome depicted in her red suit - it's like she's leading a marching band!

Rai Asuha depicts Gail in the late game with her red suit, and night star bat, and holding a lamp. She looks ready for adventure! I really like the white outline here and Gail's poofy shoulders here - the art style feels reminiscent of Final Fantasy Tactics.

Seri also draws Gail bearing her late game equipment. Unique to Seri's drawing is how all of Gail's equipment is accessible from a pocket on her shirt. I also like how Gail is depicted with her lucky earrings - that accessory is often forgotten.

Treedude depicts Gail with a bat and wearing a funny smirk. She looks like she's ready to hurt someone!

Warotar returns with everyone's favorite Great Drake, Bubbles! It seems so happy to be featured!

I'm really grateful for all the fanart this game has received. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!

Closing Notes

Pirate drew a picture to mark the occasion. It shows Gail enjoying a hot chocolate with marshmallows and a pumpkin muffin. A rest well-earned...

Goodbye! Until next time!

[something-very-special]

Call Her Back

Probably already a post with this title from the Let’s Play but it’s appropriate.

Thoughts on Replicant up to Ending A (and change):

This game is pretty. I guess it didn’t really hit me because I’ve always thought that the original NIER was pretty, but this game can be very pretty.

This in particular just kind of struck me as I was going across the Northern Plains. It had been dominantly gray, overcast skies up to that point because Part II of the game is meant to be. You know. Bleak. But I walked out onto a bright, sunny day with an expanse of blues skies, the mountains in the backgrounds, the ivy a burst of green growing up the rusted sides of the train tracks and it just kind of hit me that the game can be very pretty.

(Then I got punched out by a Shade.)

It’s definitely not a matter of massive graphical overhaul. The models look much better (getting a good look at the Twins during the finale, they really are beautiful) and I’m sure the environmental poly count is much higher and just overall smoother, and there are little touches here and there and just the capacity for better atmospheric lighting... I mean it all helps. But NIER is a game that’s always had fantastic art direction, making the most out of its budget through atmospheric tuning. There’s something uniquely beautiful about its muted palette and the way it uses its spaces that elevates it beyond the its actual technical limitations. It doesn’t look like an end-of-generation PS4 game, but that’s not an insult; it looks very much like itself from ten years ago, with its solid art direction, but touched up where it matters.

Does the sidequest grind seem... better...? I haven’t really dug into the BEST part of the game (spending 30 hours grinding out weapon upgrades) but I mentioned before my theory about how the sidequest grind is supposed to be carried out across multiple playthroughs and that’s why it sucks. To my surprise I finished Ending A missing only one sidequest (your friend and mine, Life in the Sands), with all of the other ones being more or less... pretty natural? The only thing I really needed to go out of my way for was Memory Alloy but all the other components didn’t really give me the kind of grief I remember from my playthroughs of the original. ‘Grief’ of course being relative to getting the platinum trophy, but my first time through the game I gave up finishing a few outstanding sidequests (specifically, fixing the lighthouse broke me-- I could not find 10 Mysterious Switches!)

Maybe I just got lucky, especially with the Machine Oils. Maybe some weird muscle memory kicked in. I feel like there were a few purchasing options that weren’t open originally, too, to ameliorate some of the grind, but it might also be a case of those options being cost-prohibitive so I just didn’t really acknowledge them... whatever the case the sidequest grind felt overall pretty painless. I dunno!

I really need to know how to manipulate events. For literally seven playthroughs straight of the latter half of the game I always did the keystone quest as Junk Heap (start) - Forest of Myth - Junk Heap (end) - Facade - Aerie. It wasn’t until I did a run with my college roommates and Popola gave me the Aerie letter before the Facade in invite that I realized the Aerie wasn’t actually programmed to be the last event.

Absolutely blew my mind, and ever since I became aware of it, it feels like the game goes out of its way to make sure the Aerie always comes before Facade. When I did my Let’s Play of NIER I kept a save file from the start of the kystone collection so I could re-do the events in case they went ‘out of order’ (according to my headcanon)... which they did. I replayed the latter half of the game again in order to get things the way I wanted them to be, same order, and fortunately it cooperated the second time, but I still don’t understand what the trigger is, if there’s a way to manipulate it, or when the determination is even made.

And then they throw the Little Mermaid into the mix, which I wasn’t expecting (that is, I knew it was added, but I’ve been mostly avoiding spoilers -- and happily, the changes have largely been a delight, I’m so excited for the subsequent playthroughs -- but the way it was posted about made it seem like it would happen after and apart from the keystone quest. Not so, my friends).

The reason for this is just the emotional escalation of each factor of the quest. The Forest of Myth is weird and little else (at this juncture, of course). The Junk Heap is a personal tragedy, but the actual tragedy has already occurred and you’re just experiencing the fallout. Facade is a powerful and personal tragedy that deserves to be experienced later on. The Aerie is a terrible place and nobody misses it it’s an enormous loss and profoundly traumatic for the party, and it feels like the appropriate apex to basically force them to go to the Castle and finish the fight, having already lost far too much.

Also it’s just super weird to me that they see that devastation, they literally wipe an entire settlement off the map, and then the next day everybody’s super excited to go to a wedding.

It also becomes even weirder that you go to Popola post-Aerie and nobody mentions ‘yeah that didn’t go so well’ but coming out of Seafront they have a legitimate conversation about the loss of the ferryman and the people they’re never getting back. I guess that guy had a personality but I still think maybe somebody should mention the smoking crater where people used to be.

Then again it’s legitimately funny to me how basically everybody is just agreed the world is better off without it.

This might also just be an issue of familiarity. Maybe if I’d always ended on Facade, or actually known that they could be swapped out as they are, it wouldn’t feel so weird. I definitely got used to the pacing with the Aerie at the end and I feel like I got into a debate with somebody about how it’s more appropriate for Facade to come last so this might just be a personal thing. But it’s still a personal thing and I’m still vaguely irritated I can’t figure out how it works.

Anyway I blew up the Aerie So that’s that problem taken care of.

I feel like the ambiance surrounding Wendy was a little creepier this time. I swear I heard that good stock creepy child laughter in the background.

Then the ferryman left This was a nice bit of foreshadowing; following the Aerie events I wanted to hop over to Seafront to take care of an extant sidequest only to find the ferry dock in the Northern Plains empty. I thought that maybe this was just a weird way of railroading you to make sure you went through the Village first, even though there were no scenes that would trigger just by being in the Village.

Alas.

Not gonna lie, when the couple was first introduced I thought for SURE it was going to be the wife who wound up dead. I guess it’s because the guy had a purpose as an NPC so yeah, I was tricked. Good design decision; the ferryman is talkative and bright and definitely difficult to forget and even though he was kinda obnoxious there’s a definite void where his dialogue was. It’s clever too that you’re forced to use the ferry at least once so you can’t escape the dialogue that you’re presented with, meaning that even if you don’t really make use of the ferry you’ll always have that contrast between him at the start of Part II and the other guy (his brother, maybe?) taking over the job and just not really talking to you afterward.

Episode Mermaid First of all, to be clear, I’ve not done the Route B playthrough yet. All I know about the Little Mermaid is what’s presented on the surface, what can be gleaned from there, what I remember reading in the Grimoire NieR short story. This is very much just an impression and reaction to the first encounter and it’s pretty cool.

I like that they managed to go into yet another genre style aping a point-and-click adventure.

I like the atmosphere of the wrecked ship. It really brought me back to the ‘ghost ship’ level archetype with its little hints of spookiness.

I appreciate that it ties subtly in to the Haunted Manor (technically the Part I Seafront dungeon) with Weiss’ utterly irrational fear of ghosts.

I love every excuse they find to get Kaine and Emil (and especially Kaine) out of a situation. It’s almost a running gag that Kaine keeps getting knocked out of dungeons and boss fights. None of them are quite as great as her getting Rules Lawyer’d in the Barren Temple, but there’s something delightful about “Let’s get you some fresh air, we’ll be right outside, be careful!” and then bookending it with Kaine and Emil just chilling at the end like “Well yeah there are a lot of holes in the hull we just popped in.”

(I forgot to go backward to see what happens if you try to take them into Seafront proper, gotta remember that next time.)

Interesting thing when you find some of the dropped apples is that Nier and Weiss talk about the dinner they had with the couple. This was actually a really sweet and oddly emotional conclusion to the added sidequest between the bickering couple-- entirely missable. I would assume the dialogue just doesn’t trigger if you didn’t do the quest but it was a nice touch.

I appreciate the use of dead bodies in the hold.

(That’s a sentence.)

But for the game’s focus on violence and excess of blood it’s very selective in how it uses actual corpses. Any time you see a dead body it really emphasizes the seriousness of the situation. The corpses in the hold and the blood spatter -- especially compared to how bright and clean Seafront as a whole is -- was surprisingly effective. Again, just good atmospheric buildup.

Bit of an anticlimax as a boss, though. It is a really cool boss, between the environmental buildup to the fight and then actually unveiling her, but for how big and scary she is the fight itself went by fairly quick, and the actual finale (the postman whacking her hand telling her to go away she’s groooooss) felt a bit weird in comparison to the way the boss fights in the rest of the game usually play out. Of course, I don’t have context of her dialogue (I can take my guesses, her holding out her hand to Hans as he freaks out and attacks her is already a palpable tragedy) and by the way the scene was framed I suspect the Route B reveal is where the most important part of the scenario lies.

And the seals came back! It’s the little things.

“I wish I was Fyra.” So in the original Replicant the conversation between Emil and Nier before Sech’s wedding was apparently an implication that Emil had a crush on Nier and wanted to marry him. It was ambiguous enough that people had to ask for clarification and some players interpreted it as a weird, childish expression of looking up to and respecting Brother Nier. It was clarified in the Grimoire NieR that Emil is gay and crushing hard on Brother Nier, and this line of dialogue here seems to have been... not made explicit, but changed even between RepliCant and ver. 1.22 to make the implication a little clearer, at least insofar as he isn’t interested in girls. (It winds up missing the implication that he’s into Nier specifically, though.)

...which is funny, because it colors his introduction to the King of Facade somewhat differently. These two meeting is honestly really sweet on a few levels (Sechs recognizing him from Nier’s descriptions, which implies that Nier’s been visiting Sechs regularly and so proud of his interactions with Emil he told the king of another nation all about him, and the King is legit excited to meet him) but then a couple of minutes later Emil is all ‘I’m so jealous of Fyra’. He isn’t crushing on Nier, but he is totally crushing on Sechs.

Endgame At this point in the game the distinction between Brother and Father has become mostly lost and the final charge is pretty much the same as

wait what’s up with the music in the Lost Shrine? This is Snow in Summer.

Or an arrangement thereof. That particular track level from Snow in Summer winds up getting used in a few new places and it has this kind of weird, vague sense of dread that makes it work pretty well. Utterly threw me off in the Lost Shrine, though (I think it’s appropriate given its connection to the Shadowlord/Gestalt Nier so slowly re-introducing it in the climb is pretty cool). It also builds insanely as you climb, which is a very cool effect but, um, I’m just here to pick up some sidequest items right now this feels like a little much.

There isn’t much to say regarding any impact or differences in the large part of this area of the game. It’s a good final dungeon, it carries good momentum, it works as well as it ever did (that is to say, rather well). The emotional beats are great and translate equally well between the protagonists, although I have to give the nod to Papa Nier during a lot of this just for the imagery of such a big, powerful man becoming so broken the further he goes in (and Kaine being strong enough to toss him around like a rag doll anyway).

The final flashback with Nier and Yonah also feels better with Papa Nier. I always read it as, of course, Papa Nier having his moment with Yonah, giving her the flower, and as he lays back down Yonah does the same big sigh like she’s trying to emulate her dad and it’s really sweet. This is another one of those moments where it’s not something that feels wrong in Replicant, but just having that comparison in the back of my head is something that I just can’t help.

Is Papa Nier still Best Neir? Yes.

But there’s room in my heart for Brother. I’m glad the bizarre marketing decision happened and both of these characters can exist.

...and then we reload the save. Okay, okay, so-- so here’s the thing-- I figured that’s a good place to conclude a session, right? Get to the ending, prepare for the next run. But I also know that Route B starts with Kaine’s unskippable novel segments. I’ve read them, of course, so I figure I’ll just reload into Route B so I can make a save after the novel sections, really get into the meat of Route B when I’m fresh.

So skim through those--

Beat up the Knave--

Skim through the rest--

Educated Warrior... didn’t pop...?--

Wait what’s this camera angle--

Why am I outs--

oh my god

oh my god

KAINE AND EMIL HAVING GIGGLY GIRL TALK AROUND THE CAMPFIRE OH MY GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING

THERE’S MORE.

THERE’S. MORE.

I legit short-circuited. Going in I knew they added the Little Mermaid. I knew they added Ending E. Those were things I suspected would be added and went out to specifically confirm; beyond that I’ve been keeping myself completely spoiler free.

I had no idea there was more. I had no idea this was happening.

I’m so excited.

And a goofy thought for the road

“I polished you with a special cloth, I poured warm water on you--”

“Wait, you poured water on me?”

/imagines Emil running blindfolded eight hours across the Southern Plains with an 8oz plastic water cup, getting to the library, splashing it on Kaine, waiting expectantly

/nothing happens

/walks dejectedly eight hours all the way back to the Manor

[bluemoon-writer]

Childhood Friends AU: MariKim

Part 2- in which the class discovers the MariKim friendship

You can find Part 1 here

Here is background head canons about their families

-it started in the wake of a disaster

-Francois DuPont is a magnet for crazy shit, to the point that many students are starting to become immune to some of the more mild occurrences

-a giant boulder crashes through the window one day and rolls across the room and out the door, crushing the front row of desks in the process and passing inches from Ms. Bustier

-students scream and jump, more in surprise than actual fear at this point, but back away from the windows (Marinette and Adrien both immediately dash out of the room)

-all except Chloe, who didn’t move a muscle when the boulder flew through the window, and Sabrina lays praise on her like usual

“Wow, Chloe, you’re so brave. You weren’t shocked or scared at all when that boulder flew right past you!”

“Pff, Sabrina, I’m Queen Bee, the only thing that could shock me is if Ladybug turned out to be some weakling like Dupain-Cheng”

-The class is used to ignoring Chloe at this point

-Except Kim is high on adrenaline and doesn’t want to listen to Chloe insult his friend when she isn’t even here to defend herself

-Tells Chloe to shove it

“Marinette is super brave! Remember that traffic akuma from two weeks ago? she ran straight at it so the class could get away. Last week, Marinette literally saved you from the lunch lady you akumatized by throwing a chair at her. And bravest of all, yesterday when I accidently broke one of my mom’s sculptures, Marinette took the blame for me!”

-Chloe is not impressed, “Of course you of all people would come to her defense. If she impresses you so much why don’t you go back to being best friends with her instead of glasses over there?”

-Kim is visibly confused “I…what are you talking about? I never stopped being best friends with Marinette?”

-Chloe is more focused on the dirt that’s on her sweater at this point. She rolls her eyes and drags Sabrina off to the bathroom to makeout clean her sweater

-Alya, who had been getting ready to jump into the argument, is looking more confused than Kim.

“What do you mean you’re best friends with Marinette? Everyone knows that Max is your best friend, and Marinette is mine.”

(Alya is just a bit jealous, because she’s still the ‘new kid’ and while she gets along with the other girls in the class, she’s not super close with them)

-Now Kim is really lost. “Uh, Max isn’t my best friend?”

- :0

“Kim! How could you say that, he’s right there! Max are you okay?”

-Max is also confused. “Yes? Why would I not be? It would be illogical of me to expect Kim to call me his best friend when he is not mine.”

-the classes current mental statues: ??*confusion*???

-Nino is the voice of reason, “Who’s you’re best friend then Max?”

“Markov of course! I spent years programming him, he knows everything about me, and I know everything about him.”

-Markov’s eyes turn into hearts for a moment. “I concur, Max is also my best friend!”

-The class is fucking exhausted, Kim is beaming at Alya

“Wait, but that doesn’t explain how Marinette is your best friend! You never even talk to each other.”

-Nino is subtly trying to get Alya to stop, but when Alya hears something that doesn’t add up she pushes until she learns the truth. It’s great for a journalist, but it lands her in some embarrassing situations sometimes.

-Kim is flabbergasted. The idea of him and Marinette not being bffs is so foreign to him that his brain physically can’t process it. He opens and closes his mouth like a fish trying to figure out where to begin explaining their history

-Alix rolls her eyes and comes to his rescue. “Those two dorks have been tight since before primary school. Be glad they don’t act like best friends, trust me, I went to primary school with them and they almost burned the building down.”

“Hey! That was…Marinette’s fault.”

“What was my fault?”

-Marinette is back, the class was so absorbed in the drama they didn’t even notice ladybug defeating the akuma right outside the window

-Kim is a smug bastard. “Burning down our primary school”

“WHAT! I PREVENTED you from burning the school down. You lit a match in the art FULL OF PAPER MACHE SCULPTURES!”

“Uh-huh, and when you blew the match out you dropped it in the trash, that was full of paper. Which then caught on fire.”

-This argument lasts for several minutes while Ms. Bustier recovers from the shock of almost being flattened by a giant rock

-She decides she needs to medicate with a bottle of vodka, so class is cancelled for the rest of the day

-No one tells Marinette about the argument that happened just before she walked in

-Alya watches as Marinette and Kim walk into the bakery together

-Rose swoons, “That’s so sweet. Do you think they’ll date? It would be so romantic!”

-Juleka nods in agreement, secretly hoping they do so that she can ask them for pointers on how to ask out your best friend

-Nino been knew, so he doesn’t say anything and just asks Alya if she wants to go to the movies

-Adrien got back after Marinette and has no idea what is happening

-Likewise, Ivan was listening to music and didn’t even realize an argument happened.

-Nathaniel is hit with sudden inspiration for his comic and rushes off to write it all down before he forgets

-Max and Alix…don’t care. They already knew and are more surprised by their classmate’s surprise than anything else

-Lila mentally makes Kim her new target

Why the class didn’t realize Mari and Kim are such good friends:

 1. Most of them didn’t go to the same primary school as Mari and Kim. The only people who went to their primary school were Chloe, Nino, and Alix. But even then, Chloe didn’t arrive until the second year of primary school and Nino didn’t transfer until the fourth year. 

Alix was there the first year, but was constantly switching schools when she was younger due to her father traveling for work.She doesn’t come to Francois Dupont until the second year when her father takes a permanent position at the louve so that she can stay at the same school for a while

2.  For the first two years at their Lycee they were in different classes.No one saw them interact much at school. They ate lunch together, but most of the time they went to Marinette’s house for it since it was so close. 

and sure Marinette went to Kim’s games consistently, but no one else did so they had no way of knowing just how often Mari went. And the few times other students went to the games they just assumed Marinette was there for the whole team. Because Mari’s just nice like that.

3. Even when they were in the same class again, they didn’t hang out. This is partly due to the classes’ own perceptions, they already don’t think Mari and Kim are tight, but both are friendly people so they don’t find it strange when they wave at each other or have small conversations before and after class.

Plus they have other friends. The two years in different classes did them some good. They learned that they don’t have to constantly be hanging out.They see each other enough outside of school that they figure they can use their in-class time to hang out with their other friends.

4. The Class is Oblivious. This is almost the same as the previous point, but slightly different. Whether or no Marinette and Kim are friends doesn’t really matter, it wouldn’t change anything in the eyes of their classmates, so no one is bother trying to figure out how close they are. 

They don’t see them interact much so they assume they aren’t close

This is gonna be the last part, but I couldn’t resist that Lila bit, so there’s gonna be a Part 3 ig lol

Also, look out for my upcoming post about Max and Markov’s deep friendship lmfao

[steviethechihuahuawrangler]

A Formal Welcome

So it occurred to me that I just hit the ground running. I didnt look back when I went forward and began posting intimate things onto this wonderful Tumblr. Now that I see I have a couple people following me, I figure I owe you a welcome and thank you for visiting my corner of the web, and I also owe you an introduction to who I am.

I am Stevie. There's the general business of stating that I love blogging about my transgender wife. I myself am non-binary born female and still uses she/her pronouns by default but accepts all of the pronouns...call me any of them but just keep calling me *wink* I also love blogging about mental health, human rights issues, and some spiritually inspiring nuggets I find as well as humor and my interests. I am trying to capture my spirit for you all to see.

I am a rather peace, love, and harmony kind of person. I'm a multicultural beautiful mutt of a human that loves people of all walks of the Earth. I was born into a family that always was just getting by with hand-me-downs and used cars only. We lived rather bare bones-humbly on a farm where my mom had a kaleidoscope of animals that us farm kids fed and took care of for her. I still remember wandering out in large snow drifts with buckets of hot water to thaw the ice bricks in the sheep and cow enclosures so that the poor dudes could have a drink twice a day before they froze in the Midwestern winters.

I was successful in school and graduated in the top ten of a tiny class of roughly 200 or so. I worked hard for it though and suffered a great deal. You see,

I was violently molested by a babysitter when I was in kindergarten. That mixed with my family's predisposition for kicking out babies with bipolar disorder and being the lucky winner of that lotto... made for an interesting dark cloud for a kid to compensate. The abuse I suffered at the hands of my sitter gave me PTSD and DID. Most people are familiar with PTSD, but as for DID...most only know it as multiple personalities. And no... its not like Split or even Sybil, at least not for me. I had an intricate system that worked quietly under the surface. Some of my personas my child-self made were so intricate they represented all the phoenixes that rose from the ashes of past failures. I had male personas, female personas, child personas and adult ones too, gay personas, straight personas.... I had emotions I bottled as personas as well. A total count of 16. 17 if you count the true me.

Wow this is hard to write. Hard to admit but I feel more people must talk about these things. Abuse has horrible outcomes for those who experience it. I feel I need to keep writing this because I need it off my chest and DID is a very real thing.

It had gotten so messy but I didnt even realize that it was abnormal to do it. I thought thats how everyone got through the day.... with 4+ trains of thought chattering at you, remembering things, and feeding your mind with the in formation you feel you need at the time. I didnt realize that it was abnormal at all. Its not something you talk about out of the blue with anyone either. So I had no clue I was a multiple til the ripe age of 33. And in 2 years time with mega therapy from many stellar therapists in Wisconsin, I was able to go through integration of all of my personas, making myself whole again. I essentially made myself my own program when we had the insurance great enough to cover all my treatment. I started with finding a therapist and a psychiatrist and then added DBT group therapy as my diagnoses kept changing as they struggled to find my Dissociative Identity Disorder. I added art therapy and that was the point I finally started making dramatic improvements.

They even recognized it making me a formal mentor of the therapy program I was in. I helped in IOP programs inspiring fellow addicts to get clean while working on mental health goals with them. I started helping others go to their sessions and AA meetings or CODA meetings.

My Lizzy was the one that pumped her blood sweat and tears into funding my nearly daily therapy regiment. Then when my excellent therapist.... DrTwin we will call her.... realized that I was switching personas. She argued with herself a bit on whether to tell me or just treat it without doing so but she told me DID and PTSD were the beasts causing my bipolar 2 to be unmanageable.

Truth be told I cracked down on the seriousness I put towards my therapy efforts because I could see that Lizzy, who then was living a depressed and rage filled male life as she struggled with work was having a hell of a time keeping up with which Stevie would be in the room when she came home. I could see that Lizzy couldn't keep fighting through her darkness alone either. time was ticking and I had to get to a stable place.

Thats when Lizzy's dad got diagnosed with early onset dementia. When I got stable enough I offered the jump to come back home to Illinois to help take care of him since my hernias from my botched surgeries make it hard to work. Lizzy's mom welcomed the help as we didnt find out about the dementia until Lizzy's dad already was in stage 4 of 7. now he is toward the middle of stage 5 but its usually a faster decline at this point. Though we moved quickly and helped for months his care needs began to exceed what 3 adults could do in a 24 hour period. He is now moved into a memory care apartment unit with several other people who he seems to get along with. This leads us up to present times

Where we are currently living as a tripod family with Lizzy's mom who doesn't want to live alone now that her spouse is in his new home. Its Lizzy's childhood home and one day may end up being ours.

As far as Lizzy and I, we've been courtin' since Spring of 2008. We were married in spring of 2010 and since day one Lizzy became my best friend. We met when we were in the throws of our alcoholism amongst other things I had problems with. But lets just say I would have gotten my 8 year chip on the 4th of July. SOBER 8 YEARS and feeling great. Lizzy loved me during all the high spirit days where we went to haunted hayrides and houses. Lizzy loved me when I was laying at the bottom of the tub crying and dissociating while screaming in PTSD attacks. Our life has a pulse not unlike Grey's Anatomy....which dramatic turn shall we take next? Terrible Misfortune or Blissed Out Humor? Only time will tell. But its a beautiful ride in the big picture.

I would love for you to ask any questions or leave any messages! If you want to know more I am an open book and thats why I am writing this blog. I want the world to see me. Welcome to my world! Enjoy.

*~*~*~*~*Stevie*~*~*~*~*

[everythingirl44]

What about 19 + 47 + 75 (for Staticquake) for the tropes mashup game!

19 = Summer Camp AU, 47 = Not a Date, 75 = Bed Sharing

Great minds think alike because I almost submitted this prompt minus the Not a Date. When I think of summer camp I imagine the counselors and kids in the woods with the cabins. My interpretation is probably a bit off, but I did my best. I now realize that this is LONG, but I needed to get the details before I could add the requests. I hope you like it, Lily!

Daisy woke up bright and early with a smile on her face. Today was the first day where she would be a counselor at her parents summer camp. Coulson and May started the Shield Summer Camp before they adopted Daisy. Every summer she would go there with them spending her time with the older kids. The camp accepted ages seven through thirteen for seven weeks of fun. Daisy decided to spend the summer before college working at the camp. She was dragging along her two best friends Jemma and Fitz. Daisy could hear her dad yelling from downstairs that they needed to leave. She really should have packed last night. This time it was her mom yelling for her to hurry up. She started frantically throwing clothes into her duffle bag. She ran down the stairs to see Jemma and Fitz waiting. 

“Finally! Though we were never going to leave.” Jemma said once, seeing Daisy at the stairs. The three of them loaded up the car waiting for Coulson and May. They made sure the house was locked before taking off. Abandoning the city and heading for the woods. It was about a four, five-hour drive so they would arrive before noon. The staff came in yesterday to start setting up before the kids arrived tomorrow. Daisy had her headphones in the entire ride. Sitting in the backseat listening to Jemman and Fitz argue about science wasn’t what she was looking forward to. 

“Okay kids, listen up!” Coulson yelled, grabbing their attention. Daisy started to argue that they weren’t kids anymore. That argument stopped once she saw the sign, indicating they were approaching the camp. They drove past the cabins and cafeteria to the staff cabins. 

“How exciting! Aren’t you excited Fitz? We get to help lead the science program this year.” Jemma said, pulling her bag out of the trunk. 

“Yes, yes very exciting.” He mumbled trying to pull his bag out. May pushed him aside, unloading the bag on top before tossing him on the floor. 

“You three have ten minuted to get your stuff in the cabin. Then head over to the cafeteria so we can hand out the rest of the assignments.” May said as she and Coulson got back into the car. They had to drive to their cabin to park the car. Not wanting the three teens to take it out on a joy ride.

“Jemma you’re bunking with me, Elena, and Bobbi, she already grabbed a cabin. Fitz, Hunter, and Mack are in cabin twelve! See you at the cafeteria!” Daisy said hooking her arm around Jemma’s and dragging her away. The two ran to their cabin while Fitz had to walk down the road. Daisy opened the door, quickly claiming a bed before Jemma. Bobbi and Elena already unpacked since they came in yesterday. They exchanged hellos and started walking towards the cafeteria. They talked about Daisy and Jemma attending college. Elena was one year older than them. Bobbi was two years older than the two. Jemma was probably more excited than Daisy. Jemma and Fitz were going to the same school for technology and medicine. Daisy was staying local and going to the state college for computer science. The girls arrived before Mack, Hunter, and Fitz.

“I wonder who else got stuck with them.” Bobbi said leaning against one of the tables. Daisy started laughing, knowing Fitz and Hunter could get into some trouble. Jemma pointed out that they were walking over. They tried peeking to see who the other counselor was. Elena and Mack were already there, along with the rest of the staff. 

“Daisy, didn’t your parents say who else was working?” Jemma asked, turning back to her. She shook her head and watched the door carefully. 

“You can’t be serious.” She said under her breath seeing the infamous Lincoln Campbell walk through the doors. Daisy’s known Lincoln since they were kids. She didn’t exactly hate him, she despised him. With her luck, she had almost every class with him since elementary school. 

“Okay, now that everyone is here. Let’s hand out some assignments! Fitz and Mack, you two are doing the engineering. Jemma and Lincoln volunteered to show the kids some science. Bobbi, May, and Hunter are doing the sports and physical activities. Elena, Daisy arts and crafts, but Daisy don’t forget you have a small group interested in computers.” Coulson continued to remind everyone of their assignments. Going through the schedule for room checks and night patrols. When Daisy was younger they would sneak out and start prank wars with other cabins. Kids still did it which is why they had to enforce the night schedule more.

“Daisy and Lincoln, you two have the first week of night checks.” Coulson quickly said before moving on. Daisy was in absolute shock that her dad put them together. She could hear Jemma and Bobbi laughing, knowing fully well that Lincoln and Daisy did NOT like each other. Coulson dismissed the group and told them to finish setting everything up for tomorrow. 

“It will be okay Daisy. It’s just seven nights, checking the rooms and staying out two hours after curfew with Lincoln.” Bobbi said patting Daisy on the back. She walked over to May and Hunter, probably heading off to set up the archery targets. Jemma gave her a small speech that they were adults now and should put what happened when they were kids aside. Lincoln and Fitz walked over, Daisy wanted to slap that smile right off of Lincoln’s face. 

“So I’ll see you tomorrow night? It’s a date?” Lincoln said teasingly, giving her that annoying smirk. Jemma quickly grabbed Fitz and left the building, not wanting to stick around. 

“It’s not a date Lincoln, we have to do this.” God, he was already annoying her. You’d think after twelve years he’d take a hint. 

“Sounds like a date!” He shouted as he turned to walk away. Daisy was so heated she couldn’t think of a witty comeback. Racking her brain for something to say before he was out of earshot.  

“It’s not!” That was the best she could come up with. Letting out an aggravated sigh she made her way to help Elena. Which is what she should have been doing. Daisy's sour mood continued as she and Elena were cleaning up the crafts room. While Elena was counting the supplies Daisy was sweeping the floor. She may or may not have spilled glitter on it. There was a knock on the wall that drew both of their attention. Mack asked if he could steal Elena for a bit. Daisy didn't really care, she could finish inventory. She watched as they ran off, Fitz and Jemma were also with them. Part of Daisy was jealous that all her friends had stable relationships. Her past two didn’t end well. Breaking her own thoughts she went to finish taking inventory. Be real the glitter was not going to get off the floor. 

Now it was later in the day, everyone was in the cafeteria eating dinner. Their source of amusement was Fitz and Jemma arguing over what they were going to teach the kids. Every one and a while Lincoln would enter the conversation, applying this knowledge on the subject. Daisy started talking with Lincoln's little sister who was attending the camp. Even though Daisy had a bad relationship with Lincoln, she enjoyed talking to his sister. Turns out Amanda had an interest in computers, which Daisy was very excited about. Halfway through their conversation, Daisy felt a kick against her shin. Looking across the table she knew it came from Lincoln. Two could play at that game. Continuing her conversation, Daisy proceeds to kick him back. One turned into two, then became a full out game of footies. This time when she went in for the attack, Lincoln moved his leg causing her to slam her knee into the table. Everyone turned to the two at the end on the table. Lincoln was trying to stifle a laugh, this caused Daisy to start laughing. This only made the rest of the group concerned. Daisy and Lincoln getting along? Not possible.

The next day went smoothly for everyone. Not much happened on the first day of camp. They were assigned bunks and then wandered around the camp, getting the lay of the land. Daisy was transporting a box filled with parts for Fitz and Mack’s class. She walked past the lake seeing some of the kids swimming back to the shore. She balanced the box in one hand, taking her phone out to look at the time. Daisy let out a groan, she had to do night duty with Lincoln. 

“Fitz, what is in this box?” Once Daisy got to the cabin she was quick to put that heavy box down. Fitz started looking through it, making sure everything was there and not broken. 

“Some supplies, we are having the kids build robots. So, night duty with Lincoln?” All she could do was glare at him. The last thing she wanted to do or talk about was having to spend two hours with Lincoln for the next week. 

“Please Fitz don’t remind me. I can’t stand him, for instance, this morning he switched the salt and sugar. I ended up putting salt in my coffee.” Daisy thought they finally outgrew the prank wars. They would start harmless until they started accidentally pulling others in. One time Lincoln set up a water bucket over the girls’ cabin with the intention of getting Daisy. Instead, Bobbi was the one out the door first and ended up with a cold morning shower. Coulson and may once had to pull them aside, that was the most awkward conversation. Looking at the clock she had to meet Lincoln in the courtyard to start the first rounds. Curfew was at nine because the sun had gone down. 

“Finally, you’re twenty minutes late.” Daisy wasn’t surprised at Lincoln's comment on her being late. Besides she made sure he knew she was only three minutes late. Daisy just wanted to get this over with. There were forty-two cabins, each with five or six kids. They had to spend the next two hours checking each cabin and walking around making sure kids weren’t sneaking out. They started with the seven-year-old cabin. Daisy would poke her head into the girls’ cabins telling them lights out if they weren’t already. Lincoln would go into the boys’ cabins doing the same thing. The next set of cabins they went to Daisy turned around to see Lincoln was gone. The light in the boys cabin was out so maybe he went ahead? She started walking to the next set of cabins. While walking she heard a creaking sound coming from the trees. Turning her flashlight to the trees she fully expected to see a kid sneaking out. Nothing was there and she chalked it up to a bird or small animal. She turned back to the trail, but before she could take a step forward a figure popped out of the bushes. Daisy let out a short scream before a hand was clapped over her mouth. She shoved Lincoln off of her flashing the light in his eyes. 

“Are you crazy! You scared the shit out of me!” She screamed in a hushed voice. He was hunched over laughing at her frightened state. Rolling her eyes she started for the next set of cabins with him hot on her trails. He kept saying how he didn’t think she would get scared. He was preaching to the choir, Daisy could care less. Halfway through the checks, Daisy was regretting not bringing a jacket. 

“Hey, are you okay? You’re shaking, if this is because I scared you I really didn’t mean any harm.” Lincoln seemed genuinely concerned and that was something Daisy had never gotten. They had the same friend group and saw each other every day at school, but they didn’t participate in friendly conversation. Daisy was a little take back by this, quickly brushing it off. She said she was fine and they kept walking. The later it got, the colder it was supposed to be summer for God sake! She wasn’t paying attention and tripped over her own feet. Lincoln grabbed her arm before she could hit the ground. 

“Daisy you’re freezing!” Once she was upright he quickly pulled his hand away from her. Insisting she was fine, they continued walking. He couldn’t help but notice how she was still shaking. Protesting again on how she was obviously cold, she snapped back at him that she was, again, FINE. 

“You say you’re fine, but you’re obviously cold!” 

“Why are we even having this conversation? Why do you care?” 

“You know what? I don’t! Go fucking freeze then, I don’t care!” Lincoln threw his arms up in defeat, stomping away from Daisy and to the next cabin. She shivered her way to her cabin seeing the light was off. She used her flash to glance into the window seeing the girls asleep. She was determined to go ahead of Lincoln so she could avoid talking to him. Daisy could hear his footsteps running up behind her. What she wasn’t prepared for was the feeling of a heavy and very, very warm jacket being placed on her shoulders. Immediately she wrapped the jacket further around herself, taking in the warmth. She looked over at Lincoln to see he had given her his jacket. Lincoln had no intention of arguing over the jacket. Daisy wasn’t going to say anything about it either. He still had a long sleeve shirt, while she had a tee-shirt on. Just seven more cabins then Daisy could go back to her warm bed. 

The next day Daisy and Elena were cleaning up the mess the kids left in the crafts room. Daisy slept in missing breakfast, so she was very excited for lunch. The two made their way to the cafeteria, seeing Jemma and Hunter walking over as well. The pairs met up and started chatting about the first official day of camp. 

“Daisy? Where did you get that jacket?” Hunter was the one to change the subject, eyeing the jacket. Trying to keep her composure, now remembering that is was Lincolns jacket. She never gave it back to him the night before and she wasn’t going to admit she kinda loved the jacket. They parted ways once it was eleven, both tired and annoyed with the other. 

“Just a jacket from Goodwill.” Was her response, which wasn’t good enough for Hunter. He continued to provide, hinting that he definitely knew who was the owner of the jacket. Bobbis perfect time saved Daisy from the interrogation. The cafeteria was loud and crowded with the kids. During the conversations at the Lincoln asked if anyone wanted to go with him and some of the older kids onto the lake. Several no’s could be heard in the group. Each had an explanation as to why, but he had to point out Daisy’s. 

“I’m teaching a computer class after lunch.” Was her answer to why she wasn’t going to the lake. Lincoln only rolled his eyes, there were nine kids in the class, which was small. Daisy caught the eye roll, which started another squabble between them. Ending with both of them leaving the table angry with the other. One the way out she made sure to throw the jacket straight at his head. 

This time she brought her own jacket, it wasn’t as nice as his, but she was not going to admit that. They went through the cabins a lot quicker than last time. While they wanted to go back to their cabins, they had to stay until eleven. Once Daisy did get back to the cabin she saw Jemma, Bobbi and Elena were still up. They didn’t even ask about it, but Daisy spent almost two hours ranting about Lincoln. 

The following morning the boy and girls, minus Daisy and Lincoln, met up. They knew the two were probably going to sleep in again. It was the perfect time to hatch a plan. 

“I’m tired of hearing about Daisy at one in the morning. Although I did like knowing I was right about her having his jacket.” The minute Hunter said, everyone knew what had to go down. No matter what, Daisy and Lincoln HAD to become friends, or more, by the end of the week. For the sole purpose of they couldn’t hear them complain about the other anymore. Jemma would ask Daisy to drop things off at the cabin she worked in. Fitz would ask Lincoln to see if Jemma was there on his way to the lake. They tried locking them in the room, but Daisy had a master key. That’s how they dragged Amanda into the plan. They were shocked when she was all for it. 

That night Amanda snuck out of her cabin. Daisy and Lincoln caught her quick and dragged her back to her cabin. She could see Lincoln was disappointed, but it would be worth it if this worked. During her apology she started to cry, causing Daisy to give her a hug. That was her opportunity to get Daisy’s keys. Jemma and Fitz convinced the two that it would get hot tonight for some scientific reason that Daisy and Lincoln didn’t understand. Now they were both cold and wandering around in the dark. Mack changed the batteries in the flashlights, they died quickly. Hunter and Bobbi knew there was a counselor cabin close to the kids’ cabins that wasn’t used unless kids were sick. They knew the heater worked and there was a bed inside. Hunter turned on the power and Bobbi had Elena stand in the cabin until the two noticed. She was quick to get out of there without them noticing. They walked in confused, the power was on and Lincoln swore he saw someone in there. 

“Maybe it got left on by accident, it stores medical supplies. Someone probably scrapped their knee or something.” Daisy walked back over to the door only to find it wouldn’t open. 

“Lincoln, the door is stuck.” She said trying to push the door open.

“What do you mean the door is stuck?” He asked walking over and trying to get the door open. What does he think she meant? Luckily she had her keys with her. Reaching in her pocket she realized there were no keys. 

“I must have dropped them or something.” She said, both of them coming to the conclusion that they were stuck in the cabin. 

“At least the heater is working.” He said sitting on the bed. The power going out was completely out of everyone hands. The group didn’t even know the power went out because once Daisy and Lincoln were locked in, they went to bed. 

“Had to jinx us, didn’t you? It’s bad enough we’re stuck here, but did I have to be stuck here with you?” Daisy sat down on the other side of the bed, back facing him. 

“Okay, camp princess at least I didn’t lose my keys.” Daisy turned around ready with a comeback. Why was he laying down? The question of what are you doing left her mouth. Getting comfortable, they were probably going to be locked in there till morning. 

“Could you get up, I want to be warm under the covers.” He said pulling on the blanket. Daisy wanted to protest, but the little heat that was in the room was fading. Lincoln and Daisy were tucked under the covers. There was an unspoken agreement to stay on their side and don’t hog the blanket. 

“Why are you breathing so hard?” Lincoln turned his head over, glaring at Daisy’s comment. 

“Why are you so annoying?” She sat up, dragging the blanket up with her. 

“You are the most stuck up, aggravating, know it all, who has ever walked this Earth!” She shouted at him. He stared at her not moving or saying anything. Daisy got up forgetting that the door was locked and she couldn’t walk away from him. 

“The past twelve years you have pushed my buttons. The pranks and the teasing it’s just so annoying! Yet, you have the audacity to say I’m annoying?” Lincoln has never, ever seen Daisy lose her shit. She was overall a very calm person. 

“I didn’t- didn’t realize it bothered you that much. You always play it back. Didn’t think there was a problem and if there was why didn’t you say anything?” That was a good question. Why hadn’t she said anything? Was it because she genuinely enjoyed the fun banter between them. How even why they were angry, they were laughing at each other. She went back sitting on the bed, pulling over covers over her lap. 

“I’m envious of you. You have your amazing sister and your parents. I love May and Coulson, but they’re not my birth parents. My birth parent didn’t want me and everyone I love will leave eventually.” Part of Daisy felt silly for saying that. She was deflecting her feelings because she still felt like everyone leaves her eventually. 

“One, that is the dumbest thing I have ever heard. Your friends, May and Coulson, they’re never going to leave you. Two, I’m envious of you. You have it all figured out, the college you want to go to, what you’re going to do after. You even get this really cool summer camp.” He said making her laugh. That was the first real conversation they’ve had and it was long overdue. They ended up reminiscing stories of them not getting along. 

“No, remember eighth-grade graduation. You tripped me when I was walking back to my seat.” How could Lincoln forget? She slapped him with her award. 

“This ones better, we were in high school doing a lab project. We weren’t paying attention and mixed the wrong chemicals.”

“We had to stay and clean up the mess. That was horrible!” She finished for him. After moments of laughter, there was complete silence. It wasn’t awkward, it was nice. Like they were content in each others company. 

“I think I know my favorite memory.” Daisy said rolling on her side to look at him. He faced her, raising an eyebrow. Giving her the silent question of which moment. 

“This one because losing my keys and this cabin being on, was the best thing that could happen.” She said smiling and Lincoln couldn’t agree more. 

“This whole situation made one this very clear.”

“That our rivalry was really us being horrible flirts?” Daisy was worried that ruined the moment, but Lincoln confirmed her sudden revelation. This entire time they really, really like each other. They just let the other get to them so easily that the rivalry out weight the flirting. They much of fallen asleep at some point because they were forced awake by the sun. It did get colder in the night and when the heat finally went away, they ended up cuddling for warmth. The only issue was they were still stuck in the cabin. There was a knock on the window that drew their attention away from the door. Amanda was standing there holding Daisy’s keys. She unlocked the door to show their friends standing there with wide smiles. 

“You people are evil! Do you know how cold it got in there!” Daisy screeched at the group. 

“You could have at least left the power on.” Lincoln said crossing his arms. Everyone looked at Hunter because he was the one that turned on that cabins circuit. 

“She was wearing his sweater! You all really thought locking them in a room was going to make them friends? No, you have to take it one step further. Besides, was I the only one who realized they were flirting?”

[neshabeingchildish]

Hensley & Char: Friends or Whatever || Part 2

@henryharts @junknstu1f  @just-a-j-reallly Thanks for reading/reviewing last time and here goes another...

 Buddy (in My) System

“I’ve gotten the best grades that I have ever gotten in my life working with you!” Hensley said.

“THAT’S because you have yet to do any of the work!” Charlotte complained. 

Jasper simply observed and Hensley scoffed many times, before asking Charlotte, “Well, would you prefer that I did my fair share of the work and bring down YOUR grades?” 

Charlotte opened her mouth to retort, but then shut it, out her hand on her hip, stared at Hensley and just shook her head in disappointment and disbelief at her. Hensley recoiled. She didn’t like this. This felt bad. It was like whenever her mom was about to ground her or something, and seeing Charlotte’s cute little face wrinkled in disdain, accompanied with this disapproving body language and the face, to boot. Hensley begged, “Please, never look at me like that again. I will TRY!” She promised. 

Charlotte took a deep breath and nodded her head once.

She and Hensley had been placed at project partners for the year. If there was partner work, Hensley was her partner, and if there was group work, she was in a group with Hensley and Jasper. 

This particular assignment, they were partners. Jasper’s partner was Chloe. The four of them were simply going to study together and do their work in their separate partnerships. “Why won’t the teacher let us switch?” Charlotte asked the skies.

“Rude!” Hensley said.

“I’d take JASPER over you!” Charlotte snapped.

“Really?” Jasper asked, excitedly. Hensley threw him a look. “No offense to Chloe or to you, but Charlotte’s the smartest kid in school. I’d love to change my B average!”

“You make A’s in Language Arts,” Hensley reminded him. 

“Yeah, I know, but like… I’m shooting for the A honor roll. My mom says if I can get on it, we can get a cat!” Jasper said. 

Charlotte was already setting up her workspace, at the coffee table in the Hart living room. Chloe wasn’t there yet. Charlotte suggested that she just ride along with them, but her mom didn’t want her getting into strangers’ cars… Charlotte was annoyed that her mom’s car was a “stranger’s car,” but fortunately, she wasn’t Char’s partner. Not my partner, not my problem… 

Hensley entertained, making snacks and jokes all of the study period. More than a few times, Chloe suggested that they ask the teacher if they could switch partners.  

Charlotte heard the beep of her cellphone and grabbed her things to go. "Bye, Charlotte!" They all cheered as she left. So, they DID realize that she was there. She left and went home and was finally able to work on the current project without all of the distractions. Or, so she thought.

Why was Hensley so disruptive and unfocused? Did she not care ONE BIT about any of the grades?? What if the teacher asked HER to present the information??? Charlotte gasped and began making note cards of EXACTLY what Hensley would need to say, if called upon to speak for the group. Maybe Charlotte would ask the teacher if she could partner up with Jasper for the rest of the year. His ideas were often super off and not very great, but he at least put his all into the assignments.

Hensley, on the other hand, was more concerned with getting laughs and attention and affection from Chloe. Charlotte rolled her eyes. Chloe wasn’t even that cute! Well, she was like cute in the - you could tell that she knew about trends and that she definitely cared more about her appearance and hygiene than some people did… but just physically, Charlotte didn’t see the appeal. 

She had little rodent teeth on the same face with bug eyes, and Charlotte wasn’t even drawn to her personality, so the attractiveness of her on any level - romantic, platonic, merely having to share the same space… it was nonexistent for Charlotte. She scolded herself for ragging on another girl’s looks and wondered if she hadn’t let some type of social programming prompt those thoughts. Chloe not being pretty to her specifically was not a reason for her not to understand someone else’s obsession with her. But, she couldn’t help but be aware that *blond* girls rarely had to have qualities.

Here she was, as fashionable as she believed that they came, hair game always strong, skin immaculately cared for, perfect teeth, and perfect GPA, and people overlooked her every single day. 

Being noticed wasn’t everything. In fact, her parents would tell her being noticed is a nonfactor. “Being accomplished is all that matters,” she had been hearing from her father since she was six and got 2nd place in her first competition. He didn’t feel like 2nd place was anything to be so proud of, because she “still wasn’t the best. I WAS SIX! Why does SHE have to be the best, but blond girls just have to wear a pretty outfit? ONCE AGAIN, she scolded herself.

It was a little unfair, if not slightly untrue, she guessed. She couldn’t say for sure. Statistically, she was probably right, but to sit there and research and study it - she would not. Besides, Hensley sort of muddied that idea. 

That girl wore a plaid shirt and jeans almost everyday, with an undershirt - usually something plain, barely cared about color scheme, didn’t even keep her sneaks fresh, and her hair, IF she did anything but wash it and 2 second comb through, she just threw it in a ponytail and let Chloe sort it out later, whenever the latter felt nervously embarrassed to see her friend with that mop all over her head.

But, that wasn’t really her fault. She’d let slip before to Charlotte, whenever it was the two of them, that she never learned how to do anything with her hair. Her mother, who was ALWAYS extremely pretty and put together never showed her or her younger sister how to make themselves presentable, and even Piper was learning to do it on her own. She was just better at it.

Despite that, Hensley had other charms. She was anxious, but caring. She could be self centered, but she stood up for what was right. She was infuriating to work with, but even Charlotte found it difficult not to laugh at her corny jokes. And now, she was nowhere around, and Charlotte STILL was infested with thoughts of her. BUT, maybe that expanded her original theory. Blond girls didn’t even have to wear a pretty outfit. “We’ll just take whatever blond the world throws at us, won’t we?” She shook her head and put her work away. 

.

Hensley waved at Jasper as he got into Chloe’s mom’s SUV. “It’s so nice of her to take him home. He usually has to walk. His parents never give him rides anywhere. Can’t be good for his sweating condition,” she babbled. 

Chloe smiled and shrugged, “He’s nice. I don’t mind helping out. Besides, he’s your best friend, so that means he’s a friend of mine. See you tomorrow!” She gave Hensley a kiss on the cheek and Hensley blushed, smiled and waved. 

Chloe always went along with Hensley's affectionate side, unlike Charlotte. Charlotte never even hugged her back. She just stood there, limp in her arms, looking at her like mistakes were made. It was intimidating and made Hensley be very alert and aware to try her best not to hug Charlotte much. It was sad, because hugging her was always nice for that moment that she forgot that Charlotte didn't like people just hugging her without warning. She was small and seemed to sorta fit into little spaces against Hensley's frame that usually didn't receive any contact. Plus, she smelled really good all of the time. Like coconuts and pineapples, or peaches, or bananas… something fruity and appealing. Sometimes honey.

Hensley wasn't sure why she was comparing Chloe and Charlotte. There was no comparison, really. She spent hours today trying to get Charlotte to crack a smile and take it easy for just a moment… all it seemed to do was make her more upset until Hensley just left her alone completely and hoped that she'd feel better tomorrow.

It was stressful being Charlotte's friend. She had zero others, but still acted like she didn't care to have the few that she did, and anytime Chloe was around, her irritation was heightened, though when Hensley asked her if there was a problem between them, Charlotte said that Chloe was Hensley's friend, so they didn't have to be all “buddy-buddy,” and she never even answered the question, really. Though, Hensley supposed that was the answer. Charlotte wasn’t even that buddy-buddy with her friends, so being any level of okay with others must’ve just been her way.

Still, Hensley was going to think about this randomly throughout the week… Why was it so hard for Charlotte to like her whenever everyone else clearly did?

On the way to school, Jasper said, “Hey, Hensley. Let’s stop here, I wanna get Charlotte a cupcake.”

Hensley followed him and wondered, “Why are we giving Charlotte a cupcake?”

Jasper answered with a face a tone that suggested that Hensley should know this information, “Because every time she has to do a presentation in class, she skips breakfast because public speaking makes her queasy. Then, her stomach growls until lunch because her parents have a rule about not putting food in her backpack and she follows their rules, even when they aren’t around.”

Hensley’s brown eyes went wide for a moment, then she laughed and nodded, “Right. Right. Of course, I knew that. I’m her best friend, after all.”

“Are… are you? Huh. I thought I was her best friend. Well, maybe we’re sharing,” Jasper said. “I didn’t even realize that she even liked you. You’re always upsetting her.”

“You think I upset Charlotte more than YOU do?” Hensley asked. “She punched you in the nipple just yesterday!”

Jasper held his chest with the memory of pain, “Yeah, but.. I’m sure that I’m the only person she ever actually touches on purpose. Even if it’s usually taking a swing at me for something. Wow. Charlotte’s kinda mean, huh?” He folded his arms and looked at the cupcake, contemplating eating it. “Maybe she’s the kind of girl who’s like my mom, and not the kind of girl like you.” He decided that his mom hurts him and still loves him, so Charlotte’s still his friend and he was gonna follow through with the cupcake. 

.

Charlotte gave the presentation, with Hensley cracking jokes here and there, feeding off of her energy and making the other kids laugh through what she was sure was going to be unbearably boring, otherwise. Charlotte didn’t mind, as long as all of the information was given and Hensley at least seemed to know something. Honestly, as long as the teacher didn’t ask follow up questions, because Hensley had put the cards into her back pocket and probably wouldn’t even be able to navigate them properly in the event of additional questions. Another A! And after class, Charlotte gave Hensley what she was sure that she wanted. 

“Hey, I talked to the teacher and for the rest of the year, you get to work with Chloe on partner projects and me and Jasper are gonna partner up now,” she announced, with the most cheer that Hensley had seen her exhibit probably EVER. Wow. She was really happy not to have to be her partner anymore. 

“Is this about the cupcake?” Hensley asked.

“No, but the cupcake sure was thoughtful!” She and Jasper left, talking and working out how they would do ride schedules and stuff whenever they were partners. 

“We usually go to Henley’s,” Jasper reminded her.

“Yeah, but we don’t have to anymore. That’ll cut down at least 80% of the distractions…”

“Whatever,” Hensley grumbled. 

The school year was almost over and Charlotte wasn’t going to see them for most of the summer. “I have a birthday party!” Jasper said, giving her an invitation.

“This is in July,” she said.

“That’s when my birthday is.”

“We’ll be out of school,” she said, tucking the invitation into her backpack.

“Will you be at space camp?”

“I don’t always go to space camp!” She snapped. She sighed and said, “This summer, I’m going on a geological excavation trip and a junior student council induction retreat.”

He smiled, unhappily, “It sounds like you’re making up things, now.”

She wasn’t. 

She spent her summer surrounded by kids who were a little more like her than Hensley and Jasper were, came home, relaxed a little bit, and went to Jasper’s party in July… It was… A mess. First off, his home was a nightmare, and also 15 people went to the hospital! She tried to warn people. 

“What kind of fish is in this sushi?” She asked Jasper.

“Oh, it’s turkey sushi,” he replied, coolly. 

She stared at it, sure that the meat inside of this was raw, and knowledgeable that turkey should not be eaten raw. Still, she confirmed, “So, your mom cooked some turkey and wrapped it up in sushi, because you don’t like actual sushi?”

He laughed, “Oh no, my mom didn’t do anything here. I planned and worked on everything myself. And you don’t cook sushi Charlotte.” He shook his head as though it was a silly thought… to cook the turkey that he was feeding to people. She told people that it was raw turkey in there and after the fourth person said, “Turkey sushi,” she decided that natural selection could tell them anything that they needed to know, at that point. 

But, something that she had forgotten about when she was gone resurfaced that day. She heard, “Char!” and felt herself being lifted into the air by a girl about a head taller (had she gotten a little taller this summer) and then a kiss, right on the tip of her forehead, where her hairline was. 

“Hen…” she said, less enthusiastic, but definitely amused. 

Hensley wore a “Birthday Bestie” t-shirt with tie dye and glitter and confetti. Jasper clearly made it for her and Charlotte was slightly offended that he hadn’t made her one, even though she had only really considered him a friend for like less than a year, and some cut off shorts. Hensley generally hated showing her legs. They were all scarred up from running around and playing recklessly AND they were skinny. But, she was wearing shorts today, because it was hot, and she also had her hair cut into a short style. She looked kind of like a boy, but she was much too much of a girl to look like a boy. “You look really good,” Charlotte said.

Hensley’s face brightened and she smiled wide and shrugged her shoulders, “You only think that because this haircut makes me look like a boy. All the girls that curved me before are saying that to me now.”

“The girls who did what?” Charlotte asked, then added, “Also, no. You look really good. The haircut works and it’s nice to see you in something festive and free…” Hensley simply smiled and after a while, Charlotte asked, “Wait… Did you just…?”

“Actually, right after school let out!” Hensley cheered. “Jasper helped me make the announcement on my social media.” She smiled shyly and looked at the ground, “I like girls…” 

Charlotte’s lip dropped, but in a happy surprised way and she actually was the one this time to reach out and hug Hensley. Hensley definitely grabbed her harder and held on tight. It wasn’t often that Charlotte Page started a hug. “I’m so proud of you, Hen! I didn’t know if you even knew, but the fact that you came out. That’s huge for people twice our age. At 11? That’s HUGE.” She let go and wondered, “Are you seeing anybody?” She folded her arms, trying not to look too awkward in asking this. She didn’t want Hensley to think that she was hitting on her, but she was genuinely curious about her friend’s big news.

“Nah. My mom says I’m too young to date, but when I turn 12, she’ll allow it,” Hensley cheered. 

“Did you cut your hair to…?” Charlotte didn’t know how to finish that question. 

“I let Piper cut it,” she said.

“Why do you always let that child get you into things?” Charlotte wondered.

“I DON’T KNOW! She always seems like she has every idea of what’s going on!”

“She’s a tiny person, Hensley!” Charlotte said. They both laughed and moments later, natural selection got activated. Kids started dropping left and right. A few just toppled over and held themselves. Charlotte shook her head, “I tried to tell them.”

“That turkey sushi is just raw turkey? Yeah, even I wasn’t dumb enough to eat that.” 

They walked home from the party together. Jasper’s parents kicked everyone out who wasn’t being rushed to the hospital for being violently ill. It was the first time that the two of them hung out without Jasper, and the first time they’d hung out in a while. It was cool. 

Hensley was grateful for Charlotte’s company. People were all being a little bit different with her all summer. Her dad was always trying to find gay activities that she might like, every time that he saw her. Girls were asking her, “Did you ever have a crush on me?” SOme of them were girls that she didn’t even know existed. And, Chloe sort of had been avoiding her, though whenever she saw her, the girl pretended like everything was fine. With Charlotte, everything WAS fine. She was treating Hensley like she always had. The same level of disdain for her habits. The same level of concern for things she maybe needed unsolicited advice for. She felt, at this point, all of the people who had chilled and laughed and played with her before were all sizing her up in various ways, but Charlotte? She was just… still her friend. “What?” Charlotte asked, annoyed, because Henlsey was staring at her. Same as always.

Hensley shrugged her shoulders, “I’m just glad that you’re back. I missed my best friend.” 

Charlotte fought a smile, but it happened and Hensley took great satisfaction in it. “Shut up,” Charlotte told her, but then added, “And tell me what else you and Jasper got up to this summer…”  

[klymilark]

Sore: Chapter 2

First Chapter

CW: Swearing, mentions of sexual assault

Word count: 1872

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

Kaye woke up from her slumber in a sweat.  She’s always had nightmares when moving, but it seems like a new method of torture has been introduced into her brain.  One specifically related to this move. She calms herself down, and heads to the kitchen to put coffee on. Once the coffee’s done, she goes out to the back patio to have a cigarette.  She’s been trying to quit, and has been mostly successful.  Dreams like that, however, just fuck with her in quite a few ways, so she keeps a pack around.  After her cigarette is done, Amie walks outside, and sits near her.

“Bad night?” Amie asks

“Yeah.  Wasn’t worse than anything you’ve heard, but definitely a new one.” Kaye responds.

“Ahh, that’s not good.” Amie says.

“You’re telling me. Although, I do still feel like I’ve slept, so that’s a plus.” Kaye says with a moderate tone of sarcasm.

“You always do.  Excited to see the condo?” Amie asks, switching the subject.

“Yes!  The fact that I can afford to buy is wonderful, too.  Gonna be nice to be able to rip the carpet up instead of just having to deal with it.”  Kaye says, bouncing up and down lightly.

“Woah.  Did you just act excited?!  Who are you, and what have you done with my Kaye?”  Amie asks, genuinely shocked at the display of excitement.  In all of the years they’ve known each other, Amie has not once known Kaye to show any kind of emotion beyond neutral.

“Huh.  I guess so?  This is weird.” Kaye responds, also genuinely confused at her willingness to show the emotions.  That’s something she’s always struggled with.

Amie giggles and says, “Maybe it’s the dress.”

Kaye looks down, and realizes that she is still wearing the dress she went to bed with last night.  Her face then proceeds to turn several shades of red, and you could swear a few shades of purple mixed in at some points. Amie points this out through a very poorly hidden laugh, which only serves to make the problem worse.  After another 20 minutes or so of Amie poking fun at Kaye for showing emotion for the first time, Don steps out.

“Hey, you ready to go?” Don asks Kaye.

“Oh, yeah.  Let me change into something more appropriate for heavy lifting.  I’ll be ready in ten minutes tops.”  Kaye responds, downing her coffee.

“No need to rush, I was just asking.” Don says.

Kaye runs out to the truck, and grabs a pair of canvas pants, and a flannel shirt.  For some reason, they don’t seem to fit quite as well today as they did a few days ago.  Must just be the trip.  Kaye then runs up to the box truck, and gets in.  As she waits for Don to get in his car, Amie starts knocking on her driver side window.  Kaye opens the door.

“I think you forgot something” Amie says, holding the dress out.

“No, it’s yo-” Kaye starts.

“Take it.  It’s yours. You love it, and you definitely need it more than I do.” Amie says, cutting her off.

“But-” Kaye starts.

“No.  Buts.  It’s yours.” Amie says.

Kaye grabs the dress through the window, and puts it in the passenger seat.  She then jumps down from her seat, and hugs Amie as tight as she can.  This girl has been nothing but wonderful to her, and it’s about time she starts showing some appreciation for it.  As the hug stops, Amie smiles.  Don comes out, they get in their cars, and leave.  Amie stayed behind, because she had some cleaning to do.

They pulled up to Kaye’s condo.  It was a first floor unit, which she picked out primarily for the fairly easy sound proofing she could do.  She didn’t plan to get very loud, but you never know where life will take you.  Doubly so when everything is about to change.

Before they start moving anything, they decide to walk in to tour the place.  Kaye hadn’t seen the place, and she’d been trusting Amie’s word about how well it would fit.  From what Amie said, it would be darn near perfect.  The living room was large enough that her computer could fit in the corner without obstructing too much of the room, and it had a connected half bathroom.  The master bedroom was large enough to fit a four poster bed, which wasn’t there yet, but would be one day.  The master bathroom had a corner tub that could definitely fit Kaye’s height, as well as a separate stall shower.  Finally, the spare bedroom would definitely fit all of the various implements and furniture Kaye planned.  It was perfect!

Kaye and Don began unpacking.  She didn’t have much, so it only took a solid hour. Kaye moved most of the boxes to the rooms the contents had belonged in, as did Don.

“Hey, Kaye, where do the boxes that just have a D on them go?” Don asked

“Oh, just throw them in the spare bedroom.  I’ll have to unpack everything there, since I’m gonna be kind of particular about where everything goes.” Kaye responded.

“Alright!” Don said.

As Don said that, though, the box he was carrying burst through the bottom.  What looked like a set of mountain climbing gear, plus a few other odds and ends came crashing to the floor.  Don’s focus shifted to one item in particular, though.  Settled near the top of the pile were a pair of very fuzzy white cat ears.  They had barrettes on them for attaching to the head, bells, and ribbons on them.  Don giggled a bit to himself, which drew Kaye’s attention to the mess.

“Whatcha doin’?” Kaye asks, leaning into the bedroom from the hallway.

As she stood there, her mind started racing.  Don didn’t know what she liked to do in her spare time, and this wasn’t the way she was hoping he’d find out. It’d be one thing if Amie told him, but this?!  Almost 500 feet of rope falling on the floor with cat ears smack on top.  Right in plain view.  How is she going to cover this up?  She really doesn’t feel up to the conversation right now, and she’d rather not have to go through with it until way later.  Shit shit shit!  Shit!

“What’s all of this for?” Don said.

Kaye, trying her best to maintain her composure externally, and doing a remarkable job given the night she had, and the amount of heavy shit was just moved.

“I… was in theater in college.”  Kaye said.

“I didn’t know your college had a theater program.” Don responds, puzzled.

“They don’t!  It was a local thing for college-aged kids.” Kaye says, grasping for straws

“Interesting,“ Don says, contemplating whether to believe this story or not, “You’ll have to show me a video at some point.”

“They didn’t really allow video recording a lot of the time, and I wasn’t in it for that long.” Kaye says, realizing that her story sounds less and less plausible, “Plus I mostly did lighting work.  I only had one on-stage performance.”

Really?  That’s the best she could come up with?  He’s gonna know.

“That’s too bad, but not too surprising.  You were always better with technical stuff than the arts.” Don says.

How the hell did he buy that?  That was the single stupidest excuse Kaye had ever heard from anyone, much less said.  She guesses that her friend just trusts her, or at least understands that this is a part of herself she isn’t quite ready to share yet.  

“So, that looks like all of it’s sorted.  Want to grab a few chairs?” Don asks.

“S-sure.  I’ll grab the mead.” Kaye responds.

She goes into the kitchen and grabs a bottle of the mead she brought with her.  It was a dry one that had been aged for about a year before being shipped across the country in the back of a box truck in a fairly big hurry.  While she was doing that, Don texted Amie and asked if she wanted to join them.  She didn’t, as she was just settling in for the afternoon. That was code for the bra came off, it’s not going back on, and I’m not leaving the house without it.

“Oh well, looks like it’s just us.” Don says, not too upset.

“From what she said, it seems that you two have been seeing a lot of each other lately.” Kaye says.

“Yeah.  She just quit her job, but she’s looking for another.  Last one got a bit too crazy for her to want to deal with anymore.  Thankfully she should have one soon, since she’s a damn good worker, and she has a good reference with her previous company.” Don says

“Does she?” Kaye asks.

“Yeah.  Her direct manager was awesome, it was everyone above him that was bad.” Don responds.

“I definitely know how that feels.” Kaye says, looking down slightly.

“Yeah.  Sorry for that, but it’ll hopefully get at least a little better here.” Don responds, rubbing her back.

“Thanks.” Kaye says.

“So, how’d you afford this place, anyway?  Seems like it’d be out of your pay range.” Don says, trying to lighten the mood a bit.

“One of my previous employers.  They did some particularly heinous shit, and I managed to find a lawyer willing to represent it.  I didn’t win all that much, comparatively, but it was enough to afford this place.  Should be able to get a scrap car while I’m here, too.  Outside of that, since the place is paid off, I don’t have to worry about that much. Should be able to afford it working part time, honestly.” Kaye says.

“Ahh, wish I could say the same.” Don says.

“Yeah, I wish I couldn’t, given what I went through with that place.  It’s gonna take a while to get over that.” Kaye responds.

“That’s fair.  I remember how hard it got for you.” Don responds, “I don’t see why places can’t get over that, it’s not even that b-”

“Everyone thinks I’m a rapist is why they can’t get over it.  When someone looks at you and sees nothing but an absolute degenerate, nobody wants to keep you around.  I’m honestly shocked you and Amie did, all things considered.” Kaye responds, a little annoyed.

“Honestly, things would be weird without you texting one of us at random times to vent about something.  It’s been weird to not have you randomly knock on our doors to hang out and calm down.” Don says with a chuckle.

“Hopefully that’ll start again.  I was happiest in those moments.  I felt like I was home for the first time.” Kaye responds with tears welling up in her eyes.

“Well, welcome home.” Don says, arms outstretched.

Kaye hugs him as tightly as she can, and they stay like that for a few minutes.  She cries quite a bit, but he just stands there, just like he always has.  He’s been one of the few constants to her life, and she’s very thankful for that.

“So,” Kaye says, breaking off from him, “did you want to grab a game out?”

“Sure.” Don replies.

Chapter 3

Search sbbl on my blog to find the rest of the chapters, as well!

[thewriterofmanythings]

And They Were Roommates

Day 5 of Widojest Week-There’s only one bed, or Alternate Universe

Nott and Yeza's apartment is undergoing renovations, and the cute foreign grad student Jester has been crushing on needs a place to stay. What could go wrong? Super happy with this fic. You can also read it on AO3. As usual big shoutout to @3fling for all the love and support, especially this time because I wouldn’t even have a plot for this otherwise!

Working at the local coffee shop had a lot of benefits. Free coffee of course, free pastries at the end of the night, listening to whatever music the employees wanted, and the flexible hours that worked with her school schedule.

The cute redhead grad student that came in everyday was definitely a plus too.

Jester had been working at Cool Beans for four years and had seen all manner of people come through the door. As a college town it wasn’t a surprise; people came from all over and stayed a few months to a few years while they studied. Some of those people stayed but most left to go back to wherever they came from or even off to new places. Jester herself dreamed of leaving one day, venturing out into the world and discovering what was out there. But for now she was here, working towards an art degree and making the best of her situation.

The redheaded grad student was a foreigner from Germany. He spoke excellent English though his accent was a bit tough to understand at times, especially if he ever got frustrated. His name was Caleb and he had come all the way from his home country to join one of the world’s best linguistics programs. He came in every day at exactly one p.m., ordered a sandwich and an americano with an extra shot of espresso, and sat down to study for two hours before neatly cleaning his table and heading out.

Jester enjoyed people watching, trying to analyze people from the way they walk, the things they did, how they interacted with other people. Even before she had a full conversation with Caleb she noticed he was quiet, polite, and had a dry sense of humor. His wardrobe was full of earthy tones, lots of boots and plain button up shirts, adding in jackets, scarves and hats when the weather began to turn cold. On the rare occasion he came in when it didn’t seem he was studying he still carried a simple black leather notebook. He often pulled the top part of his shoulder length hair into a sort of bun, exposing the pen he regularly kept behind his right ear. Ink marks and scratches along his hand indicated he did a lot of writing and, Jester would guess, he owned a cat.

Of course, it wasn’t all just staring from a distance. Jester had begun to build a friendship with Caleb thanks to a strange change of relationships. Most often at the shop Jester shared her shift with Clay and Molly; the three of them made a trifecta of hair colors and piercings that gave the warm shop an unexpected punk vibe. Clay was a gardener of sorts and had made friends with Yeza and Nott, the lovely couple whom Caleb was staying with during his time in the States. Molly was in a band with two women named Beau and Yasha and the group usually played in a newer dive bar downtown on Saturday nights. Jester and Clay went every week to support their friend, and one day while picking up a new plant Clay had told Yeza about the shows. Knowing it was unhealthy for Caleb to spend all his time in the house studying, Nott and Yeza had immediately booked a recurring sitter for their young son and dragged Caleb down to the bar to hang out with others. The eight of them had begun to get closer, but Jester still found it difficult at times to put herself out there and really engage with Caleb.

Today however was Jester’s lucky day.

“Caleb!” The small bell chimed through the coffee shop as Nott slipped in, shutting the door quickly to keep the cold wind from freezing the customers out. The woman was on the shorter side but no one ever noticed because her personality more than made up for it. Her sense of humor among the friend group was unrivaled and she could easily drink them all under the table.

“Ya Nott, is everything all right?” Caleb looked up from his laptop where he had been hyper focused on a paper. His brow was furrowed with a mix of worry and confusion.

Jester busied herself with straightening the pastry display, which was conveniently close to Caleb’s table. She could be particularly nosy at times due to her curious nature, but now she mostly wanted to make sure everything was okay with Nott’s family.

“I’m all right Caleb, but I’m afraid I do have some bad news. The renovation plans have been moved up by two whole weeks!”

“Oh, that means…” Caleb’s voice trailed off, his face turning into a frown.

“Yeah exactly! Yeza’s mom said she can take Luke, and we have another friend we can stay with, but she only has one extra room.”

“I see. So I suppose I will need to find a place to stay in the meantime since Clay will not be back until the end of the month.”

“I’m really sorry about that Caleb! I’ll help you look, surely we can find something soon. Maybe you can stay with Beau or something?”

“He can stay with me!”

Jester fought the urge to clasp her hands over her mouth. Wow, smooth move Jester. Inviting your little crush to live with you? There’s no way this is gonna go well, she thought to herself. She hadn’t even stopped to consider the ramifications of what she had volunteered for.

Something glinted behind Nott’s eyes and she nodded her head frantically. “Yes! Yes that would be perfect! You’re just the best Jester.”

“Oh, I… I would hate to impose, Jester, that’s very kind of you…” Caleb stuttered, his hands nervously fidgeting with his scarf.

“I think it sounds like the perfect plan.” Molly emerged from the back room where he had apparently been listening to the whole conversation. “Jessie might bring you out of your shell, Mr. Caleb, and Jester, well…. You could learn some tidiness habits perhaps.”

What a wingman, Jester thought, rolling her eyes at her purple-haired friend. He smirked, twirling around and walking to the register to help another customer who had walked in.

“Don’t you have a dog? I do not know if my cat would like that.”

“Oh that’s okay! Nugget doesn’t mind cats, he won’t bother Frumpkin!” Jester smiled at Caleb, trying her hardest not to blush.

“Well, I suppose it would be the best offer I could get on such sort notice.”

Nott beamed at the two of them. “Sounds like it’s settled then! I’ll help you pack up Caleb and we’ll be right over!”

***

“Soooo, this is my apartment. It’s nothing crazy you know, but it’s nice and has a good view and a lot of spaaace….”

Jester could feel herself beginning to ramble as she opened the door to her studio apartment. It was extremely nice for college student standards; her mother wanted her to be comfortable so she paid for Jester’s rent, but she also wanted her daughter to learn the value of hard work, meaning Jester was responsible for her own tuition and school supplies, as well as any other necessities. All things considered it was a pretty nice arrangement.

The living room was a nice open space with a gorgeous window overlooking downtown. The kitchen and living room were decorating in bright colors with unique art sculptures spaced around. In the center of the open area close to the window sat a large easel displaying a half finished painting. A number of half-dead attempts at plant keeping were littered about the area as well.

“You have a very nice place, Jester.” Caleb was huffing a bit as he carried in a large box of his belongings. Jester herself had Frumpkin’s cat carrier and a bag of cat supplies. There was still a fair amount of stuff to bring in but this was a good start.

“So I don’t have a second room but the couch is a fold out and it’s totally comfy.” Jester sat Frumpkin’s carrier down and unlatched the door. “Here, kitty kitty kitty!”

After a second Frumpkin lazily made his way out, beginning to inspect the strange new space. The two of them watched as he began to sniff the couch, marking the edge with his scent glands.

“You are an artist?” Caleb asked, gesturing toward the easel.

“I do! I’m an art major but I don’t get to do a lot of painting stuff at my level so I like to practice it here.”

“I look forward to seeing you work.”

Jester tried not to let Caleb see her blush as she began to help him unpack. The rest of the day was spent moving boxes to make sure everything was out of Nott and Yeza’s apartment in time for the renovators to begin their work, taking only a small break for Chinese food. The conversation was timid at first, the two of them dancing around each other the way acquaintances interact at a party when their mutual friend goes to visit the bathroom. But by the end of the night the two had sunk into a comfortable rhythm. As Jester went to sleep that night, she played over the day’s event in her head, giggling every time she thought about how she had made Caleb laugh. If she didn’t have a crush before, she was certainly deep in one now.

***

“Jester, look out!”

Caleb’s frantic voice came from inside Jester’s room. It had been a week since Caleb had moved in, and Frumpkin and Nugget hadn’t gotten along as well as Jester had assured him they would. He had spent the last hour trying to coax his cat out from under her bed and it seemed like the persuasion had taken a turn for the worse.

Jester glanced over from her position at the easel. She was enjoying her Saturday morning routine of hot tea and painting, listening to Regina Spektor ring out through the apartment via her wireless speaker. Her trance like state was broken as she saw Frumpkin shoot down the hallway, followed by Nugget’s large body. The cat turned sharply, but the poor dog was caught unaware and his attempt to switch directions was nowhere near as smooth, throwing himself right into Jester’s easel. Thanks to Caleb’s warning however, she was able to stabilize the workspace, only losing a bit of her paint to the tarp underfoot in the process.

Caleb ran out, his red hair a frazzled halo around his head. He frantically darted into the kitchen, trying to corner Frumpkin around the island, but the cat was wise and jumped up onto the counter, knocking over one of Jester’s plants in the process.

Catching wind of what Caleb was trying to do, Jester ran to try to intercept him, but the cat was too fast and she ended up tripping over Nugget instead. She braced herself for a fall onto the hardwood floor, but felt hands attempt to catch her. Unfortunately in his rush to help, Caleb himself was off balance, sending both of them tumbling to the floor.

Jester felt her face redden at being so close to Caleb. She could feel his breath on her face and his eyes were just inches away from her own. Her mind scrambled to think of something to say, an apology or excuse or anything, but her brain was short-circuiting.

“Paint,” Caleb said, pulling her out of her panicked haze.

“Wh-what?”

“Sorry, you uh, you have paint on your cheek.” 

She felt Caleb’s thumb rest on her cheek, gently wiping away a fleck of color. He still lay there though, holding her in his arms, inches from her face. She knew she ought to pull herself away, get up and clear her head, but she had to admit there was no place else she would rather be. “Thank you,” she said, barely daring to whisper.

“Your freckles are quite beautiful.” Caleb spoke breathlessly, his thumb still stroking her cheek softly. His eyes seemed transfixed, glancing over every bit of Jester’s face. She could feel his heart beat underneath her hand.

It’s now or never Jester, said the voice in the back of her head, and before she realized what she was doing she had closed the distance between him. Her lips touched his, quickly and softly before backing away. “I’m sorry Caleb, I don’t know why-”

Her voice was silenced by the sudden presence of Caleb’s lips on hers. He had kissed her back, but his held intent. Something about him was hungry, as if he had been waiting for this for months and he was going to enjoy every moment of it. She moaned into his mouth as her tongue slipped into hers and she moved her hand to the back of his head, intertwining her fingers through his hair.

Caleb suddenly moved away and Jester moved after him, craving more before realizing he had something to say. “I did not know this was a perk,” he said, chuckling lightly before kissing her again.

Jester in turn pulled away, laughing as well. “Only for really special roommates.”

***

“Caleb, the rennovaters are all done! You can move back in whenever you want to!”

Nott’s voice came across loud through the phone speaker, forcing Caleb to turn the volume down. It was seven in the morning and the sun was barely beginning to peek through the window of his apartment. He looked down at the woman next to him, still asleep with her blue hair splayed out across the bedsheets.

“Thank you Nott, but I don’t think that will be necessary for now.”

“Really?”

“Ya. I think things have worked out just fine.”

[astrology-india]

How To Seduce An Aquarius Man Through Text

New Post has been published on https://www.astrology-india.com/seduce-an-aquarius-man-through-text/

How To Seduce An Aquarius Man Through Text

Have you got the hots for a sexy guy and you have found out that his astrology star sign is Aquarius?

Maybe, you like me, when I had this attraction, are looking for ways to let him know you are interested without throwing yourself at him?

Well! Have you considered the possibility of trying to seduce your Aquarius crush by text ????

This may sound a bit way out! I thought so too until I found a great system that uses carefully crafted messages, with a subliminal suggestion, that draws a man to the woman who sent them.

The Proven Text’s That Will Seduce An Aquarius Man

A guy born between the dates of Jan 20th and Feb 18th comes under the zodiac sign of Aquarius the water bearer. A person’s traits and characteristics can be influenced by their star sign giving an indication of how they react in romantic situations.

An Aquarius man has very high ideals and tends to be conventional in his thinking, so you need to be careful if you are too full-on, which may scare him away. Although an Aquarius guy can seem confident on the surface, he has a shy interior and can easily withdraw into his shell.

If done in the right way, texting can be a fun and effective way of breaking down barriers and creating a romantic relationship. I say ‘In the right way’ because too many texts without foundation can be irritating for the recipient and a big turn off.

A program that has been devised by relationship expert Amy North, which shows you how to send the correctly worded messages, that will catch his attention, designed for any situation. So if you are looking to seduce an Aquarius man or re-light the fires of passion after a row, Amy has the answer.

Amy has called her program Text Chemistry because of the chemical reaction her crafted words have on the subliminal thinking of a man. If you want your Aquarius crush to focus his attention on you, then listen to a short video as Amy explains the easy way through Text Chemistry here.

Turn on an Aquarius man through text

An Aquarius man is known to have the characteristics to be ambitious and determined in everything he does. He has a work ethic of never giving up until a job is complete.

This sometimes makes him single-minded and not easily distracted from what he is focused on.

Getting an Aquarius man to show interest in you is all about activating the romance thought waves in his brain.

He is the type of guy who can be excited by intrigue and a woman who shows her mysterious side will immediately draw his attention.

Aquarius men, in general, are very competitive and want to win at everything they do. When texting it is of utmost importance to send messages that affect his emotions which trigger his natural instinct to chase you rather than make him feel boxed in.

Once you fully understand that an Aquarius man wants everything to be a challenge, you can then make yourself a little mysterious so that he feels he wins you. He has a very competitive side to him that tends to make him shie away if things are too easy.

Texting in a way that stimulates an Aquarius man’s interest in you is the key to him thinking he is seducing you rather than the other way around. To learn the stupidly simple messages that will make him want to chase after you, listen to Amy North explain her Text Chemistry here.

Flirt with an Aquarius man via text

Everyone these days has a cell phone and texting has become the most accepted way of communicating. However, this has sometimes come as a blessing in disguise because it has become easy to disregard irrelevant messages and just switch off.

People only absorb and respond to messages that have ‘That little something’ that raises their interest. So, learning the art of seduction by flirting with an Aquarius man is essential. The whole point of texting successfully is making it mysterious, so he wants to find out more about you.

Whether you are trying to attract an Aquarius man for the first time, or you are in a relationship that you feel is losing its fizz, it’s important you get it the right first time.

Do you feel in your heart that your Aquarius crush could be Mr. Right? The last thing you want to do is send a message that is just ignored or worse just deleted. Use a proven format with a message that will make him desire you and want to make you his own.

Text seduction technique

Aquarius men are usually very intelligent and realize that a relationship is based on more than looks. There is an old saying ‘Beauty, is in the eye of the beholder’ and this is something that is particularly true of the male with this star sign.

This guy is one who wants a loving relationship rather than a one- night stand. There needs to be more in his woman than looks. So, when you approach him with text it needs to be interesting and something that stimulates his intelligence.

I’m not saying that he would be looking for a brainbox but definitely a woman who is interested in topical issues and can have an intelligent conversation.

Take things slowly

Aquarius is a water sign so likes to gently flow with minimal turbulence. Make sure you adopt the same attitude of only taking the lead occasionally. A sensitive sign like his will not be pressured, just learn to be laid back and a little distant and he will want to know more about you.

The Aquarius star sign in a male indicates that he is more likely to be looking for romance rather than a one -night stand. Occasional text messages laced with some intrigue will allow him time to adjust his emotions.

Text him about his interests

An Aquarius man has a very active mind and as such, you can be sure he will have many interests ranging from sport to hobbies and current affairs. It would be good if you can find out what he is interested in because it will make it easier to have common ground.

Now I’m not saying you have to pretend to be an expert in any of these fields because if you do you will soon be found out. Just discover his pet interest and find out a little about it so that you can communicate. He will naturally be impressed that you have shown an interest.

I came across this YouTube video which explains some important things you should know about an Aquarius man. I hope it helps you in your search for true love.

Final thoughts

Texting is an ideal way to break down barriers provided it is done in the right way. Each word in every message needs to be thought out carefully. If your message does not create interest from the start it might just be binned into the spam folder.

Taking a little advice from an expert will show you how to create the desire in your Aquarius crush to open a link to your texts. The messages which you send have hidden meaning that will draw him towards you making it much easier to seduce your Aquarius man through text.

Find out for yourself the stupidly easy way to have a guy desperate to want to be with you. Listen to a short video in which Amy North explains how to capture the heart of your crush. Text Chemistry will give you the exact words to use to rise the passion in your Aquarius man.

[soysaucevictim]

Busy, busy, busy... also this post is hella long.

-

Aug. 20

I woke up around 8AM today.

I was picked up by a new/different transport service than before. Got out there in a rush, because I didn’t get up at an ideal time.

Since I was earlier to the facility and bored before group, I decided to go into the TV Room and continue sorting the VHS cassettes. Felt productive, but worked up a little sweat going up and down.

Seeking Safety went alright. I did the DD afterwards, 30 raised leg push-ups with EC... twice. I mis-remembered it as 15/15, not alternating. Pffft. :P

Then I got a chance to replace my cell. Here’s to hoping it won’t be a giant headache. But it was a thing in the anxiety BG noise to deal with, and this was needed.

Got home, did some dishes, made dinner (a bit cranky, but I’m just tired), BS’D, and did the rest of my exercise.

First, Day 10 of the PO!C. 200 overhead punches, done in one go. I alternated sides with each rep. I started feeling it by the last ~50-100 reps.

Second, Day 10 of the CoSC. 2x40″ calf raise holds. Only rested ~10″. Doable, despite being overtired.

Last, Day 10 of the 30DoY. Nice upright/standing sequence. Love the tree pose, but I did get some awkward tension in my left ankle doing them. Might not’ve been as attentive of form for that, but still, good work!

-

Aug. 21

I got up a bit after noon.

Did a bit of the usual stuff, overate and was groggy for a few hours. Was roped into playing more rummy with the family. (I won twice and grandma won once... wasn’t Dad’s day, it would seem.)

I then did my exercise.

First, today’s DD. 20 pop-up tripods with EC. Very fatiguing, especially the last half, taking a bit of digging deep to get through that! Ooof. :P

Second, Day 11 of the PO!C. 240 punches, bounce-switching every 20, and done in one go. Fun and breezy.

Third, Day 11 of the CoSC. 110 calf raises, split into 2x55. I believe I had to rest ~20″ in between. Doable, but tougher than throwing those punches!

Last, Day 11 of the 30DoY. Okay. I liked MOST of this sequence. Except TWO of the exercises. One being that hollow hold, because I never much cared for ‘em (neck strain). The OTHER was that SHOULDER STAND. Okay. The BIGGEST issue was space negotiation during the transitions (and the position of my computer, in relation to my body).

I knew I would have to do those with wall assist (did it one foot on wall at full extension). I have never done a handstand/etc before.

See how MOST of the positions have the legs splayed out at or near full extension (like that hollow hold)? That meant my upperbody was pretty damn far away from the wall. So I had to waste like 5-10″ just getting up to one.

And then I had to scramble toward getting to the fullest expression I could in ~5 more seconds. Which is hairy because you have to also mind how much pressure your head/neck is getting, during the 5-10″ left of the interval. It’s something I honestly don’t feel comfortable rushing to get into and out of. (Hell - it’s the reason I kinda swore off doing plows anymore.) orz

Now you have to lose ~5″ to getting down and extending into corpse pose. Which as a resting pose really feels hard to appreciate for only 10-15″, before repeating the sequence. :I

Now, If I COULD drop into said shoulder stand anywhere - a lot of that wouldn’t be an issue. Well, I’m glad I’ll only a have to do that one one more time in this program. And I think it’ll be way easier to negotiate from/to that knee hug before/afterwards.

-

Aug. 22

I woke up a bit before 7:30AM, today.

Got to the facility and worked on a composition sketch for a new project, I’m working on. Also spent some time doodling some of that Kefka art I recently posted. That and I listened to music, leading up to my WRAP Group - which went well enough.

I then did the DD (and a bit of socialization), before leaving the facility. 40 raised leg circles, with EC. I did this one while I was out at the facility again. Glad I remembered correctly how many to do - because that was tough! :U

Had a minor confusion about home-bound transit - but that smoothed out pretty quick.

Got home, updated a transportation reservation for next week (tripping over my words because tired), made some business arrangements, gave the ears some TLC, before a small-ish break (with the usual stuff).

I also did the rest of my exercise, kinda late.

First, Day 12 of the PO!C. 240 overhead punches, done in one go. I decided to go for 120/120 today - and oof. Last 20-40 reps on each side did get pretty intense!

Second, Day 12 of the CoSC. 2x40″ calf raise holds. I basically paused 3-10″ between sets. Manageable.

Last, Day 12 of the 30DoY. 10′ meditation. Since I got a lot of things done today - I felt a bit less fidgety.

-

Aug. 23

I woke up a bit after 11AM.

Did some more arrangements, poked the usual stuff, and did today’s DD (since today’s an active rest day, it’s the only exercise stuff I’m doing). 40 bridges with EC. This was very doable, but it did get more challenging near the end!

I then did some dishes, made some dinner, watched some Devilman Crybaby, while running some maintenance on my computer.

I needed to fix an issue involving my tablet settings- cursor disappearing on me intermittently. Blew a gasket until I figured what happened. Short of it, I think it was problems with Windows Ink.

But given I was frazzled and it was getting late. I didn’t get much else done.

-

Aug. 24

I woke up a bit after 10AM.

One of the first things I got done was today’s exercises.

First, today’s DD. 40 plank rotations with EC. This was pretty intense, had a few moments where my center was a bit off. But I managed to keep it for the whole duration. :P

Second, Day 13 of the PO!C. 260 punches, done in one go. I hop-switched at every 20 punches. Very fun and doable.

Third, Day 13 of the CoSC. 120 calf raises, split into 2x60. Rested probably ~20” in between. A bit tough, but doable.

Last, Day 13 of the 30DoY. The sequence was alright, I just don’t think my head was properly in the game. Got my cues a bit mixed up and only managed to get in a few seconds for the dancer pose on right foot (non-dominant side) - struggled to get my center stable enough to hold the expression very long today. Ah well, that’s how it is sometimes.

Spent some time with the usual, afterwards, before getting a commission done. Will be posting that when I get the green light.

-

Aug. 25

I woke up a bit before noon.

First, today’s DD. 2′ leg extensions (donkey kicks) with EC. I counted 83 reps by the time was up, and this was a fun exercise to do! :D

Second, Day 14 of the PO!C. 260 overhead punches, done in one go. I alternated with each punch and it did get pretty tough!

Third, Day 14 of the CoSC. 2x50″ calf raise holds. I rested about 10″ and this was pretty breezy still.

Last, Day 14 of the 30DoY. Oof, I had to make a few mods here. I think tiring my arms out from those overheads probably made things more challenging. I did the first upward dog proper - but after that I changed them out for cobras. Both push-up planks were sloppy - had to do the latter on my knees. Might have to do my punches AFTER plank-ish days like this one.

I then spent some time making some final touches/revisions on that commission (which I also just posted.) I did one pass through editing down the footage of me drawing it, too.

Remainder of night was spent on the usual.

-

Aug. 26

I woke up a bit before 11AM.

Did a second and final pass through video editing, before posting that footage today.

I then did my exercises for the day.

First, today’s DD. 1′ bicep extensions with EC. I'm going to count 74 reps, may've done more but unsure if that was an over-count. Anyways - another fun exercise!

Second, Day 15 of the PO!C. 300 punches, done in one go, bounce-switching at every 20.

Third, Day 15 of the CoSC. 130 calf raises, split into 2x65. Was getting to feel that - but it wasn’t too bad.

(After a break and a shower...)

Last, Day 15 of the 30DoY. 10′ meditation. Not a lot to say about this other than I believe it was pretty calming.

I kinda went to bed a bit later than usual - I felt compelled to share with pops a few history/political things. Glad though, that he was receptive and curious about said subjects (even if we jumped from Iran, to China, to Helen Keller and Woodrow Wilson... of all things.)

-

Aug. 27

I woke up a bit before 7:30AM.

Got to the facility, did the DD right away. 2′ palm strikes with EC. I got in 93 reps in the duration. The only thing that really hampered my pace was using my mp3 player as a timer, but it was no less fun! :D

Group went well enough. And I spent the rest of my time there doing some sketches and socializing (though, I admit I just didn’t get enough sleep and might not have been as great in communicating some stuff).

Once I got home and after I was able to put an order in for a bokken. Katana Week, here I come! (Well, after I’m done with current arrangements and the excitement is real!)

I was also roped into playing some cards. Dad won both games, which fair, since he didn’t win any the last time we played. Pffft!

I then spent a few on the usual, before getting in the rest of my exercise.

First, Day 16 of the PO!C. 300 overhead punches, split into 3x100. Rested ~20″ in between and alternated with each rep. A bit challenging, given my energy levels, but doable!

Second, Day 16 of the CoSC. 2x50″ calf raise holds. Rested only about 10″ again. Still very manageable.

Last, Day 16 of the 30DoY. I liked a good chunk of today’s sequence and felt generally good about my flow between each exercise (I loved the O, boat, and half lord of the fishes poses)! I did however pull a hamstring doing that single leg bridge variation - mostly because I felt to  shift the planted foots position while up. But I took care with the remaining exercises, sneaking a few moments to massage it when I could. I think we’re good!

-

Aug. 28

I woke up around 11AM, today. I got my exercise in pretty early, too.

First, today’s DD. 40 modified scissors with EC. I rather like this version of scissors - feels better in the hips and generally more fun!

Second, Day 17 of the PO!C. 340 punches, in one go, bounce-switching kind of inconsistently due to lack of focus (20-40, I believe.) Nevertheless, a perennial favorite!

Third, Day 17 of the CoSC. 140 calf raises, split into 2x70. Still very manageable work!

Last, Day 17 of the 30DoY. I appreciated that this was a gentler practice, today. I did mod that upward dog into a cobra because I kinda wanted to keep it chill. But all in all - I enjoyed myself a lot! =w=

The only other particularly productive things I got done were cancelling a reservation), doing dishes, and making dinner for the family.

Other than that - yeah. Same old business.

-

Aug. 29

I woke up around the same time as yesterday..

I determined that I would not be able to get to the facility, but did reschedule that appointment. Going to have to figure out my transportation stuff while some forms get dealt with. :/

After much of the usual, I did my exercise.

First, today’s DD. 2′ elbow clicks with EC. I counted 142 reps for the duration, but after the ~100 mark, elbows stopped being able to consistently make contact. The willpower game was real, but it was still fun!

Second, Day 18 of the PO!C. 340 overhead punches, split into 160+180.

Third, Day 18 of the CoSC. 2x1′ calf raise holds. I only dropped for ~5″ to reset the timer today. Very manageable!

Last, Day 18 of the 30DoY. 10′ meditation. My mind wandered to commission-related stuff. But I did try to stay focused on sensation of breath throughout the session.

I think I’m going to draw today, barring further distractions.

(Okay... I need to actually post this damn thing already.)

[fearofaherobrine]

Roleplay Server Log #367

“Girls Night Out, More Cheese, Not Just a Program”

[Lie] Is down by Hera's bay, just letting her feet dangle into the water. She's waiting to spot her fellow female brine as she's currently needing somebody to bitch to about her husband-

-A few sea dragons glide into the shallows and wend their way around the kelp and the mangrove trees in the shallows. Far on the horizon Basil breeches and makes a tremendous splash in the water. After a while a small white shape becomes visible in the distance and swims lazily into the bay, circling Herabrine's house.

[Lie] - Hera!

-The pale guardian's fiery fuchsia mane is visible for a moment as the shape is shed and Herabrine drops down a narrow shoot into her house.

[Lie] Groans, not really wanting to move- Hera!  Come here!

[Herabrine] is barely visible in her house below but she's bustling about doing something.

[Lie] Gets herself standing and heads for the trap door, kicking it open- Hera!

[Herabrine] Faint sound of someone dropping something and swearing.

[Lie] Huffs and makes her way down the ladder and through the short hallway into Hera's house- Hera!

[Herabrine] Come back here!

[Maggie] Bounces down the hallway towards Lie.

[Lie] Reaches down and scoops the magma cube up-

[Maggie] Excited wiggling-

[Herabrine] Oh hey, thanks Lie!

[Lie] - I've been calling your name for like ten minutes now!

[Herabrine] Sorry, I musta had water in my ears. Heh. What's the matter?

[Maggie] Is super hot and still squiggling-

[Lie] - I'm mad at CP

[Herabrine] Well come on in! You know my policy; If you have nothing nice to say, come sit next to me.

[Lie] Comes in and heads for Maggie's pen to put her away-

[Maggie] Small noises-

[Herabrine] Aw you don't have to pen her, I just forgot to shut my door.

[Lie] - Are you sure?

[Herabrine] Yeah, it's fine. Have a sit.

[Lie] Sits down on Hera's bed-

[Herabrine] Sits on the window sill - So what did the big kitty do wrong now? Try to eat Cn again?

[Maggie] Happy flop-

[Lie] - We ran out of cheese

[Herabrine] That's, that's it? I mean, he doesn't know how to make it, right? That's TLOT's thing?

[Lie] - But I want more!

[Herabrine] I think I have some... - Hops up and starts shuffling in trunks- Here I thought it was something horrible...

[Lie] - It is!  But the baby!

[Herabrne] What about the baby?

[Lie] - I'm craving the cheese because of it!

[Herabrine] I heard. You're the talk of the rumor mill since you were so vocal about hating it before.

[Lie] - Oh shush!

[Herabrine] It's true! You were more then adamant. - Pulls out a small chunk and Maggie whines at the pungent smell.

[Lie] Promptly holds out her hand for it-

[Herabrine] Gives it to her-

[Maggie] Hops down and hides under the bed-

[Lie] Starts eating- Thank you.  CP's been busy building a room for the baby...

[Herabrine] What's the theme so far? I thought he tended towards stone, fire, and huge cavernous spaces for his builds.

[Lie] - Stone so far, but I think I heard him throwing down a bit of carpet too

[Herabrine] You really do like that... I wonder if you'll go back to hating it once the little spud is born? Well I was partially right.

[Lie] - I kinda hope I do go back to hating it.  TLOT and Doc have been making cheese near non stop for me since the cravings started

[Herabrine] That's gotta be hard on your digestion too...

[Lie] - But right now it's so good!

[Herabrine] Apart from that, hows it going?

[Lie] - I'm sore almost every moment, she's decided to try and be a dancer inside of me...

[Herabrine] I know this is going to sound super obvious... but have you tried going swimming? Just floating a bit might take some pressure off.

[Lie] - ...  No?

[Herabrine] Then we should go! I don't mind going back out. I did manage to feed Maggie before she scampered off.

[Lie] - We should probably go over by the bar, the water is hotter over there and I have been getting cold a lot lately

[Herabrine] Meet me up top. I doubt you can hold your breath long enough to get to the surface from the chute- She's putting Maggie back in her pen with a little kiss-

[Lie] - Alright- She stands and pops the last of the cheese into her mouth before heading for the ladder

[Herabrine] Bustles around a little and shoots upwards through the water before bobbing up like a cork, the guardian does an artful flip and swims over to Lie, making a weird hollow noise-

[Lie] Smiles a little- I'd race you, but I don't think I'm in any condition to run- She does step into the shallows and gently grabs a hold of part of Hera

[Herabrine] Moves around a bit so her friend can get a good grip and races through the water towards the bar, fast as a dolphin despite being shaped more like a puffer fish-

[Lie] Shivers a little as they move through the colder water-

[Herbrine] Scoots up near the edge of the blocked off lava pool down the hill from the bar. The water is warmer here and she waits for Lie to get down before switching forms again-

[Lie] Slides off and floats a little- This...  Actually still feels a little cold...

-The sun is going down near the horizon and the sky is tinging a lovely shade of pink-

[Herabrine] Could you just belly up to the lava pool from the outside?

[Lie] - Maybe...- She moves closer to the lava, feeling the warm stone

-As the sky darkens there's a creak up the hill and Sam steps into the doorway, there's a tiny red point of light as he smokes a redstone cig-

[Herabrine] Flops into the lava and paddles a little-

[Lie] - It is a nice night...

[Herabrine] It's too quiet. I'm suspicious...

-Thump.-

[Lie] - There's your noise

[Mix] Fuck! -From within the bar-

[Sam] Is talking quietly to someone up the hill and turns back to see if Mix is okay-

[Moth] Is coming around the side of the library with a stack of books and follows Sam inside for a moment before peeking back out and calling down- Mistress?

[Lie] - Hm?  Yes?

[Mix] -Has dropped her mug and is trying to pick it back up- -grumble grumble-

[Moth] Are you okay down there?

[Herabrine] I think we've been spotted and it's too late to run away.

[Sam] Helps Mix and pours her a fresh drink-

[Lie] - Yeah, just trying to take some weight off

[Mix] Thanks Sam.

[Moth] I could just carry you if you're too tired to walk?

[Lie] - No thank you, I am fine for now.  What were you doing in the library?

[Mix] -Sips her drink and decides to check out the talking by poking her head out the door-

[Moth] Doing more research. Hoff is on watch tonight.

[Sam] Also wanders back out-

[Lie] - Research for what?

[Herabrine] Oh hey Mix! You should come gossip with us!

[Moth] Why babies of course! And what kinds of things we can do to help you as well.

[Lie] - That's very sweet Moth

[Mix] Mmm... okay. -Waddles down to the group, a bit wobbly on her feet-

[Sam] Sees she's having trouble and lends her a hand getting down.

[Moth] Just saunters down and plops on a sand block,- thank you mistress.

[Herabrine] Floats up a little, riding just above the surface- You look drunk Mix.

[Sam] Would eye roll if he could.

[Mix] Thanks Sam. -With Sam's help is less wobbly, but she still plops like a ragdoll once down there, tucking her legs under her- Oh you bet your ass I am

[Lie] - Everything okay Mix?

[Moth] Yes, it's not good for people to drink in excess. especially ladies. It's unhealthy.

[Mix] Mmm... Yeah. Just thinking about stuff.

[Sam] Mimes how many she's had.

[Herabrine] Whistles- That's a lot of stuff.

[Lie] - Hey now, don't try to drink for me too!

[Moth] Tut tuts a little.

[Herabrine] Something on your mind Mix?

[Mix] Aww.. but it's fun. -Rotates the little bit of fabric tied to her wrist.- Makes it easier to think.

[Lie] - What are you thinking of Mix?

[Moth] What is that? If you don't mind me asking?

[Herabrine] And where's the psycho chicken? I haven't seen him around in quite some time.

[Mix] I don't know where Benny is.. I'm kinda worried about him too.. And this? -Holds her arm out and points at the soft orange fabric- Ahhh... Just something I've hung onto for a long time.

[Herabrine] You want me to hunt around for him psychically?

[Moth] It's a pretty color.

[Mix] It is! And uh... If you don't mind? He always comes back eventually.

[Herabrine] Touches her feet on the shore and closes her bright eyes, reaching outward to find the reckless chicken with her mind-

[Moth] Puts the books away and wades into the shallows to splash her face - ahh, it's so nice and warm.

[Lie] - The lava pool does that...  I remember we accidentally cooked a bunch of lobsters when we first made the pool

[Benny] -Climbing a tree somewhere. Amazing.-

[Herabrine] Still concentrating-That was a fun night-

This message has been removed.

[Mix] -Absent mindedly twists fabric some more-

[Herabrine] I think he's trying to fly? He's in a tree?!?!

[Mix] What?!

[Moth] So what's the fabric Mix?

[Herabrine] Sends to Benny- Come to the bar you dumb birb. Mix is drunk and worried about you!

[Lie] - If I recall correctly I can't have most things that come from the water right now...

[Benny] -Falls out of tree- No! Not yet!

[Herabrine] YES Come home you stupid chicken!!!

[Mix] It's just a square. -She unwinds it and holds it up, it's got a small motif in each corner-

[Benny] No. I will soon, though. Don't worry!

[Lie] Sticks her hand in the lava to test it, when she pulls her hand out it hardens as usual-

[Moth] That's a shame. I have found quite a few dietary restrictions in the literature for the health of the baby. It's so complicated. Oh, and it's pretty Mix. I like orange. You don't see it much.

[Sam] Examines the square more closely-

[Herabrine] out loud- Stubborn ass.

[Lie] - It's already starting to get harder to walk, and I'm having to rely on you guys a bit more to tend to the animals

[Mix] I'm really fond of orange, but it makes me sad, usually. And is Benny being stubborn?

[Moth] Oh, you're light as a feather Lie. Just say the word and I or any of my brethern will gladly carry you.

[Herabrine] Yeah, he's doing something but he says he'll come home soon. Way more erudite then I was expecting him to be.

[Sam] Signs- Why sad?

[Lie] - You'd probably have to fight CP off for that honor

[Moth] Shrugs- Just offering.

[Mix] Ugh... as long as he comes home, I guess... -Small frown as she wraps the fabric around her wrist again- Uh... It was a color someone really important to me wore a lot. -Points at the fabric in explanation.- I haven't seen them in a long time. -frowns a bit and holds mug close again-

[Lie] - Do we need to go searching for somebody else?

[Mix] No.

[Herabrine] Ah.... someone lost in the turmoil before you came here?

[Mix] -Softly- Yeah.

[Lie] - I'm sorry Mix

[Moth] I am sorry for your loss then.

[Sam] Nods solemly-

[Herabrine] I dunno, living here I've learned that it's never a good idea to count anyone entirely lost.

[Lie] - This is true...

[Mix] Maybe.... But I'm pretty sure.

[Mix] Didn't mean to bring down the mood, haha.. What's been up with you, Lie? Beyond being pregnant?

[Lie] - Cravings and soreness and mood swings and I'm just a mess

[Herabrine] She's also super cold and inhaling TLOT's stinky gold cheese like it's going out of style. Don't have kids Mix. -chuckles- It seems like a huge pain.

[Sam] signs -Unless you're having an egg haha.

[Mix] Heh, don't plan on it anytime soon,

[Lie] - Well it's not as if CP and I planned this

[Moth] This is true.

[Herabrine] Eh, you're good with kids though. I figured this would happen eventually anyway.

[Sam] Signs- So how is your household faring Mix?

[Lie] - Actually, you could say Sam is partially responsible for my getting pregnant

[Mix] It's alright, Prince is adjusting to seeing really well, and. .. Stev and NK are fucking like bunnies at every opportunity. -Softly- At least I wasn't that bad....

[Sam] Signs frantically - Me??!? What did I do???

[Herabrine] Ha! You should encourage them to get their own build if it's bugging you.

[Lie] - The alchohol you gave as a belated wedding present?  That's what CP and I drank right before, well, yeah

[Sam] Signs- Oh geeze! I'm sorry Lie!

[Mix] -Very blunt look at Hera- They have one. On the shore. They're L O U D.

[Lie] - There's nothing to apologize for Sam, we also forgot to take one of the berries

[Herabrine] Maybe you could surround their house with wool, real subtle like? -grins mischeviously

[Mix] -Strokes chin thoughtfully- Maybe..

[Sam] Still looks contrite

[Herabrine] Can I help? [wool everything over mostly]

[Lie] Winces a little, feeling the baby squirm-

[Herabrine] Feels her distress - Put your arms out and float.

[Mix] Sure, I don't mind

[Moth] So what's this about a chicken anyway?

[Lie] Does as Hera instructs- Come on, calm down little one

[Herabrine] She's fiesty.

[Lie] - And taking after her father, she's griefed CP and TLOT

[Moth] Giggles- With some well-timed kicks.

[Herabrine] Tries to brush the babies mind to see if she can read anything-

-There aren't really any thoughts yet, but it's responding to Lie's movement and voice-

[Moth] Notices Hera's look of concentration. - Getting any signals miss?

[Herabrine] She's just listening and kicking around-

[Lie] - Well she could tone down the kicking a little

[Mix] -Plays with the fabric some more while watching-

[Moth] If she's listening, maybe I can help. - She starts to hum a few bars and then breaks into a soft lulling melody. It's wordless but tuneful and she has a lovely voice.

[Herabrine] Is staring openmouthed. - So much for the old joke about teaching a pig to sing....

[Lie] Feels the baby squirm a little more before she starts to settle a little

[Moth] Keeps singing softly and there's a hush in the few milling mobs beyond the pool of lava light, after a little while she trails off into a few trilling notes and goes quiet- Is that better?

[Lie] - She did settle down a little

[Moth] Good.

[Herabrine] So what's the story behind your hankie Mix?

[Mix] I hurt myself on accident and we didn't really have anything on hand to stop the blood flow. He said I could keep it once I cleaned it up. -It sounds pretty simple. A little too simple.-

[Herabrine] Ah, we all have our mementos.

[Lie] - My memento just lives with me

[Moth] Gives Mix a supportive pat with one huge hand.

[Herabrine] Ha! Too right. He needed a keeper anyway.

[Lie] - I'm surprised he hasn't come looking for me yet actually, he's fretting almost more than anyone else

[Herabrine] If you legit yelled at him for there not being any more cheese he might have gone to get more....

[Lie] - Well Doc went out and I don't know where TLOT is...

[Sam] Signs- You can pretty much just yell for TLOT from anywhere and get his attention...

[Lie] - Doesn't mean he'll respond if he's with Steve

[Herabrine] That's a good point.... And if he is ahem, 'with Steve' it's not smart to interrupt. Especially if you value your eyeballs. hehe.

[Lie] - Not like that's stopped CP before

[Moth] The master is quite tenacious.

[Lie] - Actually, does anyone know where Doc went?  I saw they left with Notch and some others...

[Mix] No clue here.

[Herabrine] If they took Notch it's probably money related since he has the cards. Or they went to visit the office staff. Who else went?

[Lie] - Um, Deer, Flux, Yaunfen, I think HG and Glitchy too?  I was a little miffed at the time so I wasn't paying much attention

[Herabrine] If they took the kid... it can't be anything dangerous.

[Lie] - True

[Moth] whistles as if she knows nothing, though she does have suspicions.

[Lie] - ...  I'm getting cold again...

[Herabrine] There's always the lava? You could just dip your feet?

[Lie] - It'll just harden on me...

[Herabrine] Yeah, but feet are easy to clean.

[Lie] - True...

[Moth] You could sit against me?

[Lie] - Yeah, I guess- She stands walking out of the water and once the air hits her she starts shivering, hard- Maybe getting in the water was a bad idea...

[Herabrine] Hmm. - She waves her hands and raises several water spawn blocks out of the water into a column that's as warm as a shower and endlessly falling beside the lava pool-

[Moth] Interesting trick-

[Mix] -Claps- Niceee!

[Herabrine] Try that. It's pretty hot.

[Lie] Moves into the water- Thank you Hera.  Hey Mix, do you want a sobering flower?

[Mix] Nah, I'm good. I'd get sad again. Best not to let this go to waste.

[Lie] - What are you sad about?

[Mix] The person I lost, mostly.

[Lie] - Who were they?

[Mix]  -Shuffles a bit before pulling a small picture out, it's off two figures, one of which is a more happy looking Mix, and a taller person who's got his arm around her shoulder and a hesitant smile on his face. Around Mix's neck in the picture is the fabric she's got around her wrist currently.- Him. He... meant a lot to me.

[Lie] - Oh Mix...

[Mix] -Looks fondly at the picture- Yeah...

[Lie] - What was his name?

[Mix] Niko. His name was Niko.

[Lie] - That's a nice name

[Mix] Yeah... -Fond sigh-

[Lie] - Are you sure we wouldn't be able to find them?

[Mix] Yeah, certain.

[Lie] - I see...

[Herabrine] Did a NOTCH get him Mix?

[Moth] Little intake of breath.

[Mix] No, thankfully. I think I would've kicked the fuckers ass if it was. -Small frown-

[Herabrine] That's the spirit!

[Moth] Then what.. what happened?

[Mix] -Stares at the picture a bit more before shaking her head.- I don't... I don't want to talk about it right now.  If.... If that's okay.

[Lie] - Absolutely, we understand

[Moth] Okay.

[Herabrine] So how's your tribe doing?

[Mix] -Perks up a bit- The lightfeet are doing wonderfully! They're not lazing about now! -Returns picture to her inventory-

[Herabrine] What happened to get them moving?

[Mix] Give them a ball and you get them off their asses, apparently.

[Moth] What's a ball?

[Lie] - An object you can throw around and play with

[Moth] Oh that makes sense!

[Herabrine] And Liz? I haven't seen her lately either. Getting big yet?

[Mix] Liz is getting long, mostly! Shi's out and about just.. at odd times. Really odd times.

[Herabrine] And the big daddy and the little shy kiddo?

[Moth] Perhaps she's nocturnal?

[Mix] Big... daddy?

[Herabrine] Snaps her fingers - Gambit?

[Lie] - Endrea's kids are getting so big too

[Mix] ... Oh! Gambet, and his kid? Uh.... Not too sure. I've seen Alan when Liz brings them over. Alan's a bit skittish still.

[Sam] signs- Well they are dragons... Endrea is HUGE.

[Herabrine] Sometimes kids are just shy.

[Lie] - Hera...  I want more cheese...

[Herabrine] Sorry, I'm fresh out.

[Sam] Signing - cheese?

[Lie] Whines a little-

[Moth] at Sam, - the Golden Steelton TLOT makes.

[Sam] Oh.

[Mix] The stinky stuff.

[Lie] - CP better get some soon

[Herabrine] Almost makes me feel sorry for him...

[Moth] Offers her some watermelon slices - I heard these were a common pregnancy craving Lie.

[Lie] - I'm not craving those, but I probably should have something other than cheese and chips...

[Sam] signing- I could make something?

[Lie] - I'm not terribly hungry right now...

[Herabrine] Okay Lie, lets just get you home then. Hopefully Cp has your cheese by now...

[Lie] - Okay...

-After Hera leaves Lie at her house the white haired brine heads for the workroom to warm up by the lava.  As she turns the corner a pleasant scent reaches her and she's moving closer to the source.  Turning the corner into the room proper she finds that CP has set things up for her even though he currently isn't home.  There are freshly picked pods and flowers from her vanilla plant and a few of her calming blossoms scattered about as well.  She realizes that at some point he must have gone out to the real world as there are a few candles lit around the lava tub.  Lie's annoyance at him vanishes for the moment as she moves to take full advantage of what he has offered her.  He's left her one of his shirts by the tub as well and she slides into the warm fluid gratefully after stripping herself to wait for CP to return-

-Deep below the lab in their private room TLOT and Steve are curled up on a rug near the lava pool. The two men are snuggled in eachothers arms just enjoying the warmth and companionship. A little food and drink sits forgotten nearby and LH is stealthily dragging away a neglected porkchop-

[CP] Has been looking stomping around looking for TLOT for hours and has only just gotten to the lab- TLOT!

[TLOT] Flops against the bed with an annoyed groan- mentally- go away Cp....

[CP] - No!  Lie's mad

[Steve] Is sort of eavesdropping and his thought is loud- How come?!

[CP] - Because we're out of cheese!

[TLOT] Rubs his temples as the beginning throb of a headache ripples across his brain- Not again...

[CP] Starts coming down the stairs- Yeah well I'd rather have a happy wife!  I didn't realize how much she was sneaking out of the chest without my knowing!

[TLOT] Faintly imitating Cp's tone. - Yeah, well you keep driving off my mate and it would be nice if I could have a happy husband....

[CP] - Yeah well you've never seen Lie mad like this!

[Steve] Incredulous- How bad can it really be? She's usually so nice...

[CP] Gives them a mental burst showing Lie's emotional change-

[Steve] -Blink blink- He knows it's bad to say but can't stop himself- Now you know how she felt trying to keep you happy and calm at the start...

[TLOT] Oh dear...

[CP] - TLOT, just tell me you have some more of the damn cheese stored away somewhere?

[TLOT] I do not. I gave it all to you.

[CP] Long string of curses-

[Steve] Won't she accept anything else? Eating just cheese can't be good. How about the... whatsit...?  huumy bows?

[CP] - She's not even that hungry!  She just wants the cheese!

[TLOT] That's very strange...

[CP] - I mean yes she will eat a few other things, but she mostly wants the cheese, and she's getting more demanding of it

[Steve] Do we have to do this? Can't you ask Doc?

[LH] Scampers up the stairs with the meat.

[CP] - Doc went out

[TLOT] How interesting... Damn it.

[CP] - I'm hoping she'll be a little calmer by the time I do get back to her, but she'll go right back to rage if I don't have any cheese

[Steve] Still quietly pondering the irony, it's not like Cp can't hear his thoughts or anything.

[TLOT] Flops in annoyance.

[CP] - Well?

[TLOT] Take Steve someplace for about ten minutes so I can make some and clear out the smell. Be nice! I want to get right back to where I left off as soon as possible.

[Steve] Huh?

[CP] - Why do I have to take him somewhere!?

[TLOT] Because I don't need you hovering over me any more then I need him crying from the smell!

[CP] - Fine!- He grabs Steve and actually teleports them near his home, so he can check and see where Lie is and what sort of mood she's in

[Steve] Is released and thumps a few inches to the ground. - Oof! Damn stiff boots...

[CP] Sends out his senses and feel Lie in the lava tub- Well at least she won't be moving from there...

[Steve] Oh? Is she in bed with Blake, Hope and the vulpixes?

[CP] - Nope, naked in the lava tub.  Even with her emotions running haywire, she won't run around naked, plus hardened lava makes it a bit harder to move

[Steve] You guys should keep some potions around for that, it makes that stuff slip right off.

[CP] - Nope, I prefer to take it off myself.  Besides, I suspect she'll be in there a lot with how cold she's been lately

[Steve] The kiddo wants the heat, doesn't she? Geeze... you'd think she's part nether dragon.

[CP] - Well I run pretty hot myself...

[Steve] Yeah, I know. -stretches- TLOT is the same way. It's pretty comforting. Especially if you've been working and your muscles hurt.

[CP] Just shrugs-

[Steve] So... uh... hows Stevie handling his glitch? -There's a question here he's afraid to ask anyone-

[CP] - Well so far he hasn't turned his house into a glacier- His psychic abilities are wandering a little

[Steve] Do uh....? - He scuffs a foot in the grass a little - Do you think the glitch might get worse over time...?

[CP] - Maybe a little, it took a bit of time for mine to stabilize

[Steve] Did you do anything special to... fix it at a certain level...?

[CP] - Nope, I let it settle itself out, was too painful to do otherwise

[Steve] Pales a little- Painful? What...? Like trying to fight or hold it was hurtful?

[CP] Thinks for a moment- Trying to stop it I believe, it was so long ago that I don't really recall

[Steve] How would you even stop it...?

[CP] - I don't think you can

[Steve] Is staring off into space unhappily- Oh...

[CP] - TLOT should be done by now, let's go

[Steve] Yeah.. okay... - He's checking- Give him another few minutes, he's fumigating the room.

[CP] Groans in annoyance-

[Steve] Awkward silence. -

[CP] Waits for the time to pass before grabbing Steve and teleporting him back-

[TLOT] Has already cleared the room and put the cheese in a trunk- Here, take this weird plant too. - Holding out the failure plant- Lie might be able to do something with it, but I hate the way it smells. Yaunfen made it accidentally.

[CP] - Fine- Takes everything and then teleports back to his house

[Licht] Sighs as she gets into her cruiser, having just been called to a burglary-

[EAlex] Makes a thoughtful noise as the phone is placed against the passenger seat- Your GPS is all over the map... what on the seed are you doing?

[Licht] - My job.  Currently I'm heading someplace that was broken into, burglarized

[EAlex] Burglarized? Was is that?

[Licht] - It means somebody forcefully entered the domain of somebody else and stole things

[EAlex] There's a sharp intake of breath and she's quiet for a moment. - That explains your harshness then... You hunt griefers...

[Licht] - I...  Suppose so?  I hunt criminals technically

[EAlex] There will always be rules and people who break them... But there will also be those who are hunted because they look like troublemakers, even if they aren't.

[Licht] - Here you cannot be persecuted just by how you look, at least not legally

[EAlex] I remain skeptical of that.

[Licht] Pulls up to a house and plugs a set of headphones into her phone so she can still hear EAlex as she goes into the house to look at the crime scene-

[EAlex] Is using the camera lenses on the phone to look around - So much detail, and people... with weapons..? - She shrinks uncomfortably back into the deeper guts of the phones small hard drive.

[Licht] - Nobody is going to use a weapon here.  We carry them for protection and only use them as a last resort.  In fact your more likely to be hit by the taze gun than the real one

[EAlex] Still... humans use weapons rather freely. Especially the younger ones. A child with a simple iron sword can cause a lot of pain. And I do not know what this taze you speak of is.

[Licht] - It's a device that delivers a non lethal dose of electricity to stun people

[EAlex] Sounds like something a NOTCH would use, to force compliance when someone disagrees with them...

[Licht] - We use it when somebody is being threatening towards us.  Most people are compliant and understand that they did something wrong.  And what would Markus have to do with anything?

[EAlex] So says one with power to one without; I'll only hurt you if I have too... And NOTCHs are evil. They rule with iron fists and crush unbelievers.

[Licht] - There's only one

[EAlex] I wish... many wear the mantle of NOTCH, and many use it to spread fear.

[Licht] - So somebody pretending to be Mr. Perrson?

[EAlex] You don't understand...

[Licht] Looks up as another officer approaches-

[Offcer] - Licht, busy morning?

[Licht] - Yeah, you?

[Officer] - Just a few traffic tickets

[EAlex] Is quiet but uses the camera to examine the person she's talking too, she's nervous being around such a huge human and the phone shakes slightly in Licht's hand.

[Licht] Is just talking business and being briefed on what had been stolen-

[Officer] - So yeah, if you want to go start checking some pawn shops...

[Licht] - Why the rush to get me out?

[Officer] - Face it, your tenacity is why you get stuff done, so the sooner we get you on this, the sooner it might be solved

[Licht] - Fine fine

[EAlex] Like an angry wolf...

[Licht] Starts heading back towards her car- Well, guess it's time for some leg work...

[EAlex] Why did you light the summoner? It seems you have no time for any world besides this one.

[Licht] Huffs a little- The game itself was given to me as a clue to what Markus was doing.  When I got in there, there was a chest with a book with instructions on how to build the summoner, so I built it

[EAlex] Then you have no idea what you called for... and what you recieved is even more terrible.

[Licht] - What do you mean?

[EAlex] The summoner isn't a toy, and the thing that answered it's call is not... normal...

[Licht] - So?  It's not like it effects me

-There's a bit of a pressure change in the air and Licht feels suddenly short of breath, it's a distinct pain around her throat that's sharp and gone as quickly as it arrived. The phone lets out a burst of white noise and EAlex calls out in alarm as the small device starts downloading something in the background.

[Licht] Quickly pulls over and curses a little in Swedish- Wha...  What?

[EAlex] Is visible on her screen stomping against the wallpaper in obvious distress.

[Licht] - What was that?

-There's a small pop and an icon for Minecraft pocket edition is visible long enough for EAlex to let out a small cry of alarm. She stomps on the wallpaper and makes the icons wiggle before slapping at the X to delete it frantically. -

[Licht] - What are you doing?

[EAlex] Falls over and lays flat on the surface of the wallpaper like she's making a snow angel and breathing hard- Saving our pixels!

[Licht] - What did you do?

[EAlex] Don't talk bad about... him... He'll take it out on us both. But he needs a copy of the game to get at me more easily on your phone.

[Licht] - You mean the Herobrine on the computer?

[EAlex] YES. The one who took my spawn!

[Licht] Makes a frustrated noise- You're just some random ai, not even real, why do you try to act like it!

[EAlex] I'm not an AI! I'm a glitch!

[Licht] - Whatever!  Either way!  You're just programs!

[EAlex] No we're not. - She sits up and gets closer to the screen by standing on an icon- Just because I'm not made of meat and water like you, doesn't mean I'm not real.

[Licht] - You are a program!

[EAlex] I am not! I have a soul! -waves her hands in frustration- What can I do to prove it?!?

[Licht] - There's nothing to prove!

[EAlex] So I am sentenced to be a non-person by someone who claims to uphold justice?

[Licht] - You.  Are. A. Program!  One I could easily throw away!

[EAlex] Shakes with fear- You're a player just as evil as a NOTCH, one who would kill for no reason.

[Licht] - I do not kill!

[EAlex] If you delete me, I will die.

[Licht] - You technically don't actually exist!  You were made, AS A PROGRAM!

[EAlex] I WAS NOT MADE. The world gave me a place to gain a body! But I existed as a spirit before!

[Licht] - Yeah right- She pulls up in front of the first pawn shop- Just shut up and let me do my damn job

[EAlex] very quietly- I think you're the one with no soul.

[Licht] Goes about her job for the rest of the day in a somewhat foul mood, deciding to end her day at a bar-

[EAlex] Has rearranged Licht's icons and is now browsing the internet in an equally unhappy mood. Her activity is visible on the screen and the battery is running a bit low. -

[Licht] Grumbles and pulls a charger out of her bag and plugs it and the phone into the wall as she waits for her drink-

[EAlex] Takes a measure of electricity for herself and tries to order her thoughts. The phone is flat and she can't see anything but the ceiling.

[Licht] Receives a decently strong drink and starts downing it-

[EAlex] Resigned and quiet-  Could you at least prop the phone up? I don't think that's too much for non-person to ask.

[Licht] - Why?

[EAlex] So I can see.

[Licht] - There's nothing to see

[EAlex] Then I'll just stare at the ceiling. - She sits down with a huff. - And me without even a Steve or an Alex to bother...

[Licht] - Oh fine!- She tilts the phone up so EAlex can see

[EAlex] Notices her drink. - Can you spare 17 Krona?

[Licht] - Why?

[EAlex] Because... I'm hungry and I have an idea.

[Licht] - No, you don't need it, nor do I think you need food

[EAlex] I could be mean and just take it, but I chose to ask.

[Licht] - And I could let my phone use neither data or wi-fi

[EAlex] -Theres a quiet but very distinct rumble from the earbuds, it's unmistakably the sound of an empty stomach.

[Licht] - Nice try- She asks for another drink, having finished hers

[EAlex] Picks around on her wallpaper and looks up pleadingly, her eyes are a bit dimmer then they were when she entered the phone and the distance from her game is wearing on her a bit.

[Licht] - Humor me for a minute- If you were to get some food, how would you expect them to shove it into the phone?

[EAlex] Weakly and a bit resigned- I know an app game I can take some from, it's not expensive.

[Licht] - Fine, do whatever

[EAlex] Vanishes with a soft voomp. The phone warms as it downloads a small app and a new icon pops up. There's a sound like someone desperately eating something messy-

[Licht] Just starts working on her second drink before glancing at the screen-

-The icon is Fruit Ninja-

[EAlex] Reappears with half a watermelon and a bit more glow, she's still eating but more slowly now. - ........ thank you.

[Licht] - Whatever

[EAlex] I guess I should be grateful for anything. It's not a bad game either, and I could unlock all the swords if you wanted...

[Licht] - I'd never play it

[EAlex] Of course.

[Licht] - You know what, I'm going to give you ten minutes...

[EAlex] Ten minutes to what? Beg for my life some more?

[Licht] - To convince me that you are what you say you are, a being with a soul

[EAlex] Her eyes go wide - H-how? What would you even accept as proof?

[Licht] - That's for you to figure out

[EAlex] Spreads her arms- I am a finite creature with a mind and feelings. How is that different from you? Perhaps I should ask what you could say to prove to me that you aren't a demon with no soul yourself.

[Licht] - Simple, I'm human, I am made from flesh

[EAlex] Bristles as she speed reads a few articles from the web - Flesh is atomic particles and waves and mostly empty space. You're made out of electricity same as me.

[Licht] - I am more than electricity

[EAlex] I can show you the science. Written by your own people... Give me another test.

[Licht] - You haven't convinced me yet, you haven't proven anything to me yet

[EAlex] Then tell me what can a human do that a program can not?

[Licht] - We can create legitimate life, plus there is consequence when we take it

[EAlex] If I killed too many players I would be deleted. Is that not a consequence? And too my chagrin, I have the female parts to make a child. But even if I wanted one, I would need a mate.

[Licht] - Still not convinced little program

[EAlex] Grimaces- can a program feel pain?

[Licht] - They can be programed to believe so

[EAlex] Can a human tell the difference between real pain and someone programmed to simulate it?

[Licht] - Most of the time?  Yes when looking at context

[EAlex] Gives her a grim look- Fine. - She vanishes back into the small icon and comes back out with a plain sword from the game. She grits her teeth and slashes her left arm with the blade before dropping it with the shock of the pain. She can't hold back the wail of agony that escapes her lips as she bleeds copiously on the backround wallpaper and sinks to her knees with tears streaming down her face.

[Licht] - Context, you are a program, it doesn't really effect you.  You are made of nothing but data

[EAlex] Is cradling her arm in agony and making a rather large pool of blood. It hurts too much to muster more then a choked response. It's the merest gulp of air and labored breathing echoing in the earpiece.

[Licht] - Nice try, but I'm not convinced

[EAlex] Must I... die to plead my case...?

[Licht] - It's not as if you'll actually die

[EAlex] Then I cannot convince you, without destroying myself... Then my small existence is doomed...

[Licht] - Then just accept it, you are nothing more than a program

[EAlex] Stronger with sudden fury - I AM NOT A PROGRAM.

[Licht] - You have yet to convince me otherwise

[EAlex] Is near passed out from the blood loss and pain, her head is spinning, she didn't realize how weak she'd be away from her game with an injury to boot. - You are a monster... without pity...

[Licht] - If you're done being insulting, I have some work to do- She digs through her bag and pulls out a folder containing some of the information she has on Markus

[EAlex] Passes out from the pain, and lays there very still on her wallpaper in a pool of bright crimson blood.

-The phone shakes a little and the pocket edition Minecraft reloads itself again. There's a rather creepy laugh in her earbuds-

[Licht] Twitches a little-

[???] Awww... did the weakling hurt herself?

[Licht] - Not sure how a program can actually hurt itself

[???] Just because you don't know how something works, doesn't mean it's impossible. Why was she playing with a blade?

[Licht] - Trying to prove she was real

[???] Laughs- She's too weak to prove anything to you. Perhaps I should take a turn..?

[Licht] - What are you talking about?

[???] Ignores her question- How about I show you something really good....

[Licht] - Only if it helps me solve this case

[???] Hmmm... It might.... And it might entertain me for a moment as well...

-There's a sudden shift in the atmosphere, as if she stepped sideways out of reality, the people around her slow and freeze in place but there's still a rather schizophrenc chorus of whispers all around her. -

[Licht] - Wha...  What's happening?

[???] Just a bit of fun.... - The air goes dark and foggy until her vison is blotted out entirely and she feels large hands wrapping around her windpipe and squeezing just enough to make it hard to breathe.

[Licht] Tenses and squirms a little-

[???] Opens white eyes that fill her field of vision and half-blind her. His breath is hot against her face - Do you believe now?

[Licht] - What are you doing!?

[???] Leaving a few marks.

[Licht] - Marks?

[???] Squeezes a little tighter, the skin already purpling under his grip-

[Licht] - S...  Stop it

[???] Or what?

[Licht] - Just...  Stop...

[???] Are you trying to goad me into killing you so soon?

[Licht] - You kill me and you'll find no way to Markus

[???] Markus isn't my prey my sweet, but good try.

[Licht] - Then what is?- She's starting to get woozy

[???] All in good time. - He notices her slipping and puts her down roughly- Can't have you dying on me just yet.... - The whispering goes up in volume and the color and motion resume around her. Her reflection is visible in the bar mirror and there are already angry purple and red bruises in the shape of hands forming around her throat.

[Licht] Quickly motions that she's like to pay and grabs her phone, her hands shaking a little

[EAlex] Slowly coming around with a pained groan...

[Licht] Pays and hurries outside-

[EAlex] Is bumped around a little and opens her eyes - You are... fleeing? OH!

[Licht] Scowls as she opens her car door and tosses the phone onto the passenger seat-

[EAlex] Drags herself to the fresh icon and sets everything wobbling before deleting it- You... you are injured?

[Licht] - I...  I don't understand...

[EAlex] What is there to understand? You seem so certain we are just programs that feel nothing.

[Licht] - That...  That doesn't explain how he was able to...

[EAlex] Now do you believe me?

[Licht] - I...  Maybe...

[EAlex] Then at least my suffering isn't in vain...

[Licht] Starts up the car and begins heading home-

[lokistories123]

The internship (chapter 2): That’s my girl

Okay so first: to prevent any confusion from happening. This Blog and foreverdrivinginpuddles123 are both my blogs. This blog is the side blog (with fanfiction and NSFW fanart) and foreverdrivinginpuddles123 is the main blog. Also: let me know what you think of this story. I’m not the confident type of person.

Your first official day as an intern.

You woke up by the sound of someone singing. When you quietly laid your head on the door that led to Loki’s room, you could hear it was him. It sounded like a lullaby. You opened the door.

“Hey, Good morning Loki.” Loki was a bit startled that you just opened the door, and he was even more frightened that you’d hear him sing.

“Uhm, hey… good morning Natasha.” You both exchanged smiled.

“How late is breakfast usually?”

“It’s pretty early, but it’s from 7 till 10.”

“That’s not bad. Thanks. I’m going to get dressed and have breakfast then.” You smiled at him and closed the door. You chose to wear black jeans with a white shirt and neon green shoes.

“Good morning Natasha!” Jessica yelled from the other side of the room. You obviously weren’t fully awake yet. You rolled your eyes and smiled at her.

“Hey Jess.”

“Not yet awake, now are we? Did Loki keep you up all night?!” She giggled.

“OMG Jess, no he didn’t. What do you think that’s happening up there?”

“Oh nothing, just you trying to get some extra points” She winked at me and we both laughed.

“No, that’s not me. I’ll just write a pissed of essay on why I should deserve more points, if not done verbally.”

“That’s my girl.” You and Jess got along really well. And she enjoyed your sarcasm.

After 20 minutes when you and Jess were having one last coffee, Loki entered the dining hall. He threw some food on the plate and seated himself next to his brother Thor. You noticed he didn’t exchange one word the whole time. He wasn’t a morning person either. Jess was trained by Natasha Romanoff and Natasha picked her up to start the training

“See you later Nat!” Romanoff eyed her weirdly but then remembered that you shared a name.

“Later Jess!” You were now all by yourself at the intern table. You decided to grab a cup of tea with a cupcake to make the morning enjoyable. After you seated yourself again you noticed Loki walking towards you.

Loki didn't even notice you until you stood up to grab something to drink. You weren’t allowed yet to sit where you wanted, so he decided that he would come to you. He really did want to bond with you, but he was afraid to be himself just yet. That was the reason he usually didn’t tutor any interns, because they were afraid of him. But somehow you were very casual around him and didn’t show any signs.

“How I hate mornings.” Loki said and grabbed Natasha’s cupcake, tore It in half and ate one half of it.

“Join the club. I switched to tea for now. But 90% of my veins are coffee in the morning.” You said sarcastically.

“So, I usually start the morning in the training halls. For most of my morning anger goes into that.”

“Yeah sure. I go where you go.”

“After that I’ll show you around the researching halls and medical halls, may you ever need those. Although I hope not.”

“Okay.” Loki was glad that you were okay with his plans.

You both walked towards the training halls. But then everything came back to you: you were never really good ad defending yourself. When you entered the hall, you could see all sorts of people doing all sorts of “training”. There were different kind of weapons that people were training with: guns, bow ‘n arrows, blades, knifes, electric thingies. And then there were all sorts of fighting skills as well. You stopped walking and turned white. Loki noticed you weren’t walking besides him anymore and turned around.

“What? Did that cupcake turn you stomach?”

“Well… I never did anything that’s happening here right now.” Loki rolled his eyes at you.

“Isn’t that the whole reason you joined the intern program?”

“Not exactly, I thought my medical and technical skills would be at good use. I didn’t think I would be trained into a super spy.” You felt even more awkward since it was Loki you were talking to. You still had to keep away those fangirl feelings (if you know what I mean). You went from white to tomato red.

“Well, it depends on the tutor Natasha. I have little medical knowledge and no technical knowledge. What I do know is how to fight in battles. I’m Asgardian if you’ve forgotten.”

No, you didn’t forget. Look at this man. The divine was dripping off of him. You didn’t want to look like a total loser, so you made the decision for yourself that a bid of stamina wouldn’t hurt nobody.

“Yeah I haven’t forgotten. But before you kill me with impatience, we do have to start from scratch.” Loki shrugged.

“That’s why you’re an intern Nat. Now let’s pick a weapon first.”

Instead of a banquet of foods, there was a banquet with all sorts of weapons. There was something about these daggers that took you interest. You grabbed them both and when you turned to Loki he was smirking.

“What?”

“Those are MY daggers.” Well fuck.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I’ll pick something else.” Shit shit shit you thought to yourself. One way to start a trusted friendship by annoying the hell out of a god. Although if he would do anything, you’d probably say thank you anyway…

“It's fine. We’re here for you anyway. But we should ask for a second pair at HQ.”

You grabbed them both and Loki explained the whole art of throwing daggers and using them in fights. You sucked at first, but after a few tries to throw them at a close “target” (big board) you finally got one to stuck in the board.

“YES.” Was all you could manage to say, and Loki just smirked. You could tell he was enjoying it, but he wasn’t going to give in on the second day.

You trained for another two hours and then it was already 1 PM.

“Okay, Natasha. I think that’s enough for now. I’m starving. Let’s get lunch.” You wanted to go on and on and on, since you were finally getting the hang of it, but you decided to just listen to him before you’d get in trouble.

“Okay.” You handed Loki the daggers, and when he securely put them away again, you went back to the eating halls. It had turned from a breakfast feast into a lunching feast.

Loki immediately went for the food and you went after him. But Loki didn’t seat himself at the table you were seated, no, he seated himself next to the Avengers. But he didn’t talk at all. You did feel a bit hurt. But you also understood the ranking systems. He was the tutor and you were the intern.

Jessica wasn’t there, and neither were James or Katherine. You did know the other interns, but they weren’t THAT nice too you. There were even a pair of guys throwing sexual comments at you the WHOLE time.

“Looking fine Holmes, what did you do?”

“How about you come to my room and I’ll show you some tutoring.”

“Is Loki a bottom or a top? How much work do you have to do to get those points?”

You didn’t even sit for 3 minutes, but you decided to call it quits and just wait for dinner and hope that some nice people would be there as well.

“SHUT UP YOU ASSHOLES!” you threw your plate with food at one guy and the other got the drink thrown at his head. You shoved the chair backwards with so much force that even the chair got damaged. You angrily walked out of the eating halls.

“NATASHA!” You could hear Loki calling after you. It wasn’t anger in his voice, but worry.

You entered your door and slammed it shut as hard as you could. You were still smart enough to lock both doors. Quickly after that you heard someone knocking.

“JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!”

“Nat? Are you okay? I just walked in when I saw you throwing your food at those guys. Is everything okay?” You could hear it was Jessica.

“Yeah, just some horny assholes. But I need some alone-time. Please.”

“Okay, if there’s anything I can do for you, just let me know.” You could hear Jessica walking away. You threw yourself on the bed and started tearing up a bit. What a hell this would be if those guys were to keep bothering you for a whole year!

After a while you fell asleep and when you woke up there was a tall figure standing next to your bed. You quickly slammed your fist at it and went out of bed the other side.

“Ah, for fucks sake!” After your eye-sight finally woke up too, you noticed it was Loki that you just punched in the crotch area. He was in a bit of pain. You walked up to him to comfort him.

“Loki, I’m so sorry. I thought one of those sneaky bastards sneaked up in to my room, to do god knows what.”

“Nope. Just a sneaky bastard in general.” He said with a high voice.

“Oh my god, please don’t kill me.”

“Nat! Stop thinking that I’m going to kill you.”

“Sorry, I really am sorry!”

“It’s okay. We’re okay. If I knew you better I might say I need a kiss on my booboo, but let’s not do that.” He laughed. You didn’t know what to do, so you just stood there frozen.

“That was a Joke Natasha. You’re supposed to laugh at one.” Loki said smiling.

“I was pretty sure, that you were going to kill me after that!” You pointed at his crotch.

“Well, you had your reasons. I didn’t quite notice what was going on back there, but I did hear it from some other interns. Why are they making sex jokes?” You really didn’t feel very comfortable to even bring up that word to him, but you had some explaining to do.”

“One guy even has a black eye. You threw that plate with quite some anger…”

“Well.. Everyone is thinking I’m sleeping with you for A. the whole internship in the first place and B. for extra points. They think this because I AM staying at your guest room. They also say that the other tutors say you don’t get close to anyone really, and now you’re tutoring an intern. And since I’m a woman 1+1 makes 2.” You had a sad expression on your face and you hated the idea of making Loki feel bad.

“Oh! So that’s the reason why everyone’s been acting so weird... Like I said at the interview, you have something that interests me. But that doesn’t mean I want you as my personal little fucktoy like Tony does with his interns. And there was no place anymore at the intern’s wing, so I came up with an idea myself. Some humans are so stupid.” Loki rolled his eyes.

“Well, yeah. I know that, but the other 99,9% that walks here doesn’t.”

“I’m not going to explain myself to those children. And even if we did have a sexual relationship. It would be none of their business.” HE was so goddamn casual with al this sexual stuff, while I almost had a bleeding nose even trying to talk about it. Must be because he has like a thousand years of wisdom in his pretty head. You just stood there with a questioning face.

“I can tell, this isn’t your favorite subject to talk about?”

“No. But just let it go. I hope they’ll stop after what I just did, and if they don’t… I’m going to need those daggers of yours.” Loki smiled.

“That’s my girl.” You could feel a friendship starting to come together.

[solarbird]

The Armourer and the Living Weapon, Chapter 18: forgetting the old days

I forgot to mention, last time, but Dr. Ngcobo is based on concept-art Mercy, for those familiar with that.

This chapter is worksafe.

[AO3 link]

"Oh, I know this," Lena said from inside the sensory isolation chamber, as the song played. "You used it last time, too."

"You know it?" Angela asked by microphone, watching peripheral nervous system reactions in real time. Dr. Ngcobo, also watching by remote, noted that the ring didn't shift, but Lena talked through it, so of course it didn't. He queued the sample for replay again, later.

"Yeh. Always have."

"That's interesting," Dr. Ziegler replied, pausing the stimulus set. "It's a fairly obscure traditional tune, a lullaby - how do you know it?"

Lena shrugged, mostly relaxed and floating in the dark. "Just do, that's all. Makes me think of my mum."

"You... I did not think you remembered your mother."

"Don't, love. Pop, either, not really. But, y'know..." she waved her hands around a little in the small space. "Y'have impressions, doncha? Ideas? I do."

She's never mentioned this before, Angela thought, but when has there ever been cause? I should check her psychological profiles. Aloud, she replied, "I suppose one may well. I'm going to repeat it, later - when you hear it again, I'd like you not to talk. Let your body react to it, but nothing else. Is that all right?"

"'Course it is. I like it - particularly the tune, yah?" A little 'heh' came over the speakers. "Shame the singer sounds like, well, you know. Her."

"...Moira? Does she? I didn't notice."

"T'me she does. Particularly in the low notes."

Well, Angela thought, that's interesting. She added two more, similar snippets she had identified in advance to the queue, randomly interspersed. Let's see if that repeats, as well.

Oilliphéist and Widowmaker watched from behind glass, sitting in a viewing room, able to see the chamber and both doctors at work, and hear them as well. Lena had insisted on that in the strongest of terms, and Angela did not push back, but certainly noted it for discussion later.

Danielle considered what she'd heard. "Did... that sound like Dr. O'Deorain to you?"

Emily snorted. "Aunt Moira can't carry a tune in a bucket. But if she could - maybe, a little?" She smiled, calm but deeply aware and ready, her arm around her lover's shoulder. "I really don't know what Ziegler's chasing, here."

"Perhaps some sort of keyword, some sort of..." She tapped the armrest of the chair. "Some sort of activation phrase?"

"What, like in those old movies?" Emily laughed, a little. "Doesn't work that way. Even I know that."

"Doesn't it?" the Widowmaker asked, one eyebrow raised. "I received a 'go' code."

"You were already all there, sweet. I know, I was on the team."

"My first kill," the senior assassin sighed. "And I felt nothing at all."

"I'm sorry for that. The doctor and I both wanted it to be different for you, but..." She shook her head. "That... reminds me... of something. What... was it... oh!" She sat up straighter, silver eyes bright. "In your office at the chateau, you have a framed picture from Amélie and Gérard's wedding. It's the two of them cutting the cake."

Danielle blinked, surprised, something not easily done to the spider, and she looked directly at her counterpart. "...I do? Really?"

Emily nodded. "Yes! It's on the bookshelves, to the left of the desk. I was so confused. Why?"

"I..." She shook her head. "I suppose it was already there, and I never thought to throw it away," she replied, not as entirely convinced of that as she wanted to be. "I imagine you smashed it?"

Emily chuckled. "'Course not, sweet. It's yours! Why would I do that?"

"Because you hated him! Fiercely. I may not have felt anything yet, and I know not to entirely trust my own memories, there have been too many changes, but... I still remember how you hugged me when I returned. How happy you were that he was dead." She gave the other woman a soft smile. "That... I did feel. Just a little."

"Aw. Love you too, pet. And I remember that. But it's all water under the bridge, these days." She grinned, freely. "He's gone, you're here, we're together, I'm..." she hugged herself, and shivered a little with pleasure, "...oh, it's hard to describe, but I feel so... complete, at last."

She looked back through the window, keeping an ear out for any additional conversation from the doctors on the other side of the glass. "I really think she's starting to settle in, too. I was thinking about it a couple of nights ago, I thought it'd be such a struggle, but... no. She's become a brilliant weapon."

"She already was," Widowmaker noted, a little quirk up at the side of her mouth. "That's what got my attention at the start."

"And so easy to like! I told her back at Auntie's place that I'd never kill her, because you love her, but..." she smiled broadly, "I don't even want to!"

"I like our new sleeping arrangements," the spider said, quietly, gaze focused on the chamber.

"So do I," replied her beloved.

"We should talk more seriously about the future, you realise. Not here, of course, but..."

Oilliphéist nodded, agreeing. "Yes. I love Aunt Moira, but..." A bit of a grimace. "She's a tricky one. We'll have to stay a couple of steps ahead of her if we can, for all of our sakes."

Danielle reached over and took Emily's hand back into her own. "I'm... relieved to hear you still agree."

"Don't worry, sweet." She grinned, nuzzling at Widowmaker's hand. "I've got you. We'll be fine." A glance back up, through the window. "All three of us."

-----

"I am increasingly worried," the doctor said, sharing documents across the table to the subset of Overwatch personnel present. "But I cannot give you a firm reason why."

"She's not... acting entirely like herself, is she?" Winston said, nervously, flipping through pages of data he was not reading. "I've worked my entire life to understand human body language, and it's not always easy, but I've got a pretty decent grip on it. Hers is different, now."

"It is," Morrison nodded. "Has been since the eyes, but it's getting worse."

"She was always very tactile, very physical," Dr. Zhou said. "But you see her with them, and they're always touching. Over and over again. It's a little off-putting."

"It's a little creepy, you mean," said Hana Song, back from Korea only a few hours before. "No, it's kind of a lot creepy. And that palm nuzzling thing is just bizarre."

"She is not changing any more, not physically," Angela said. "Some of the body language, I think, is more getting used to a very different nervous system than she once had. But I have also noticed the... nearly obsessive need for physical contact with Widowmaker and Oilliphéist. With everyone else, she's hardly touch-averse, but it is different."

"That part seems pretty normal to me," Winston noted. "She still sneaks up and gives me a noogie at least once a day."

"I could fly in after the show tomorrow," Lúcio said, over comms. "I haven't seen her in a while, I could tell you how much she's changed, or hasn't..."

"If you can manage it, certainly," Angela replied. "The more data I have, the better. But I am far more concerned with the reactions in her nervous system."

She brought up a set of charts that wouldn't mean anything to anyone not a research doctor, but they gave her something to point at while speaking, and that made her feel better, like she had more of a grasp on the situation than she really had. "There is a hint of a pattern to sensory input reactions. It is not a pattern I can yet identify, it is not anything easy to find - she does not react, for example, to video samples of Moira, with or without sound." The doctor switched to paired video of Dr. O'Deorain and Lena's data, placid and nonreactive.

"It would be very tempting to make assumptions and be led seriously astray... but... there are... agh," she spat the word. "I do not like speaking in such terms. It is very un-Swiss of me, but there are... rumours and innuendoes. There are inferences in these numbers, barely outside margin of error, but... I cannot even say they are statistically significant. I simply do not understand them yet."

"She clearly hasn't been programmed to like Dr. O'Deorain," Winston said.

"No, clearly. Similarly, not Talon. It is entirely possible that it is just biases in the way her nervous system works, and it could turn out all to be something as trivial as your love of peanut butter, which is, for the record, complex in similar ways." She glared at the shifting data. "But - I am convinced something is here."

"You heard her at the debriefing," Morrison said, flatly. "Would the Lena Oxton we know - we knew - smile at Widowmaker relishing a kill?"

"That's unfair, Jack. You know how she scored on psych exams back in '68. It's why..."

"Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. But..."

"Look, n00bs," Hana Song interjected. "You're all missing the obvious. Spiderbitch is one thing, okay? She's a defector. She's a merciless assassin, but she's also a victim. So I can just about see Lena going for that, particularly given her looks. Everybody with me so far?"

"What are you getting at, Hana?" asked Lúcio.

"C'mon - Oilliphéist? Really? Oilliphéist?! She isn't a victim. We don't know much about her, but we do know she wanted this. And Lena is apparently... okay with that? And we're supposed to be okay with her being okay with that?" She crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. "I don't think so."

"She and I have talked about it," Winston said, "She's aware..."

"And she's still doing it. Watch 'em touch. I'm not sayin' they're in love, it's not even sexual, they're touching just all the time. Watch them. It's weird."

"Should we cancel this operation? Talon has already taken a real body blow. The governments are finally starting to set their operations in motion..." asked Winston.

"No," said Mei-Ling, firmly. "Absolutely not. The risks are too great."

"Even if it means we lose Lena to... whatever this might be?" If it's even anything, he prayed to himself.

Mei-Ling looked down at her padd, eyes haunted, and did not reply.

"Look," Winston continued, "why don't we just... get her away from them for a few hours. See how that goes. We could have an Overwatch Night Out tonight, like we used to. Hana, you come; Angela, you bring Fareeha. All of you, me, Mei, Lena... see if we can't just remind her who she's always been. She if she snaps back."

"That would be wonderful," Mei-Ling said, wistfully. "I miss those days very much. It seems so long ago already."

"The pub back in Gibraltar?" Angela asked, a bit of a smile. "It has been a while."

"Why not? It's a bit of a haul, but at least they're used to me," Winston noted, "And Athena could fly us back if we stayed up too late."

"It would be worth a try, at least," Angela said, thoughtfully tapping her chin. "We are in an alien and stressful environment, particularly for her. If she reverts to normal in a comfortable, normal situation, then perhaps... we are all just reading too much into everything."

"She is not the only one under stress," Dr. Zhou noted.

"I can't believe we're having an executive meeting to decide to go out for drinks," Morrison snarked, shaking his head.

"You have forgotten the old days, Jack." Dr. Ziegler snorted. "I absolutely can."

[foreverdrivinginpuddles123]

The internship (chapter 2) : That’s my girl

Okay so first: to prevent any confusion from happening. This Blog and Lokistories123 are both my blogs. This blog is the main blog and Lokistories123 is the side blog (with fanfiction and NSFW fanart). Also: let me know what you think of this story. I’m not the confident type of person.

 Your first official day as an intern.

You woke up by the sound of someone singing. When you quietly laid your head on the door that led to Loki’s room, you could hear it was him. It sounded like a lullaby. You opened the door.

“Hey, Good morning Loki.” Loki was a bit startled that you just opened the door, and he was even more frightened that you’d hear him sing.

“Uhm, hey… good morning Natasha.” You both exchanged smiled.

“How late is breakfast usually?”

“It’s pretty early, but it’s from 7 till 10.”

“That’s not bad. Thanks. I’m going to get dressed and have breakfast then.” You smiled at him and closed the door. You chose to wear black jeans with a white shirt and neon green shoes.

 “Good morning Natasha!” Jessica yelled from the other side of the room. You obviously weren’t fully awake yet. You rolled your eyes and smiled at her.

“Hey Jess.”

“Not yet awake, now are we? Did Loki keep you up all night?!” She giggled.

“OMG Jess, no he didn’t. What do you think that’s happening up there?”

“Oh nothing, just you trying to get some extra points” She winked at me and we both laughed.

“No, that’s not me. I’ll just write a pissed of essay on why I should deserve more points, if not done verbally.”

“That’s my girl.” You and Jess got along really well. And she enjoyed your sarcasm.

After 20 minutes when you and Jess were having one last coffee, Loki entered the dining hall. He threw some food on the plate and seated himself next to his brother Thor. You noticed he didn’t exchange one word the whole time. He wasn’t a morning person either. Jess was trained by Natasha Romanoff and Natasha picked her up to start the training

“See you later Nat!” Romanoff eyed her weirdly but then remembered that you shared a name.

“Later Jess!” You were now all by yourself at the intern table. You decided to grab a cup of tea with a cupcake to make the morning enjoyable. After you seated yourself again you noticed Loki walking towards you.

 Loki didn't even notice you until you stood up to grab something to drink. You weren’t allowed yet to sit where you wanted, so he decided that he would come to you. He really did want to bond with you, but he was afraid to be himself just yet. That was the reason he usually didn’t tutor any interns, because they were afraid of him. But somehow you were very casual around him and didn’t show any signs.

“How I hate mornings.” Loki said and grabbed Natasha’s cupcake, tore It in half and ate one half of it.

“Join the club. I switched to tea for now. But 90% of my veins are coffee in the morning.” You said sarcastically.

“So, I usually start the morning in the training halls. For most of my morning anger goes into that.”

“Yeah sure. I go where you go.”

“After that I’ll show you around the researching halls and medical halls, may you ever need those. Although I hope not.”

“Okay.” Loki was glad that you were okay with his plans.

 You both walked towards the training halls. But then everything came back to you: you were never really good ad defending yourself. When you entered the hall, you could see all sorts of people doing all sorts of “training”. There were different kind of weapons that people were training with: guns, bow ‘n arrows, blades, knifes, electric thingies. And then there were all sorts of fighting skills as well. You stopped walking and turned white. Loki noticed you weren’t walking besides him anymore and turned around.

“What? Did that cupcake turn you stomach?”

“Well… I never did anything that’s happening here right now.” Loki rolled his eyes at you.

“Isn’t that the whole reason you joined the intern program?”

“Not exactly, I thought my medical and technical skills would be at good use. I didn’t think I would be trained into a super spy.” You felt even more awkward since it was Loki you were talking to. You still had to keep away those fangirl feelings (if you know what I mean). You went from white to tomato red.

“Well, it depends on the tutor Natasha. I have little medical knowledge and no technical knowledge. What I do know is how to fight in battles. I’m Asgardian if you’ve forgotten.”

No, you didn’t forget. Look at this man. The divine was dripping off of him. You didn’t want to look like a total loser, so you made the decision for yourself that a bid of stamina wouldn’t hurt nobody.

“Yeah I haven’t forgotten. But before you kill me with impatience, we do have to start from scratch.” Loki shrugged.

“That’s why you’re an intern Nat. Now let’s pick a weapon first.”

 Instead of a banquet of foods, there was a banquet with all sorts of weapons. There was something about these daggers that took you interest. You grabbed them both and when you turned to Loki he was smirking.

“What?”

“Those are MY daggers.” Well fuck.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I’ll pick something else.” Shit shit shit you thought to yourself. One way to start a trusted friendship by annoying the hell out of a god. Although if he would do anything, you’d probably say thank you anyway…

“It's fine. We’re here for you anyway. But we should ask for a second pair at HQ.”

You grabbed them both and Loki explained the whole art of throwing daggers and using them in fights. You sucked at first, but after a few tries to throw them at a close “target” (big board) you finally got one to stuck in the board.

“YES.” Was all you could manage to say, and Loki just smirked. You could tell he was enjoying it, but he wasn’t going to give in on the second day.

You trained for another two hours and then it was already 1 PM.

“Okay, Natasha. I think that’s enough for now. I’m starving. Let’s get lunch.” You wanted to go on and on and on, since you were finally getting the hang of it, but you decided to just listen to him before you’d get in trouble.

“Okay.” You handed Loki the daggers, and when he securely put them away again, you went back to the eating halls. It had turned from a breakfast feast into a lunching feast.

 Loki immediately went for the food and you went after him. But Loki didn’t seat himself at the table you were seated, no, he seated himself next to the Avengers. But he didn’t talk at all. You did feel a bit hurt. But you also understood the ranking systems. He was the tutor and you were the intern.

Jessica wasn’t there, and neither were James or Katherine. You did know the other interns, but they weren’t THAT nice too you. There were even a pair of guys throwing sexual comments at you the WHOLE time.

“Looking fine Holmes, what did you do?”

“How about you come to my room and I’ll show you some tutoring.”

“Is Loki a bottom or a top? How much work do you have to do to get those points?”

You didn’t even sit for 3 minutes, but you decided to call it quits and just wait for dinner and hope that some nice people would be there as well.

“SHUT UP YOU ASSHOLES!” you threw your plate with food at one guy and the other got the drink thrown at his head. You shoved the chair backwards with so much force that even the chair got damaged. You angrily walked out of the eating halls.

“NATASHA!” You could hear Loki calling after you. It wasn’t anger in his voice, but worry.

 You entered your door and slammed it shut as hard as you could. You were still smart enough to lock both doors. Quickly after that you heard someone knocking.

“JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!”

“Nat? Are you okay? I just walked in when I saw you throwing your food at those guys. Is everything okay?” You could hear it was Jessica.

“Yeah, just some horny assholes. But I need some alone-time. Please.”

“Okay, if there’s anything I can do for you, just let me know.” You could hear Jessica walking away. You threw yourself on the bed and started tearing up a bit. What a hell this would be if those guys were to keep bothering you for a whole year!

 After a while you fell asleep and when you woke up there was a tall figure standing next to your bed. You quickly slammed your fist at it and went out of bed the other side.

“Ah, for fucks sake!” After your eye-sight finally woke up too, you noticed it was Loki that you just punched in the crotch area. He was in a bit of pain. You walked up to him to comfort him.

“Loki, I’m so sorry. I thought one of those sneaky bastards sneaked up in to my room, to do god knows what.”

“Nope. Just a sneaky bastard in general.” He said with a high voice.

“Oh my god, please don’t kill me.”

“Nat! Stop thinking that I’m going to kill you.”

“Sorry, I really am sorry!”

“It’s okay. We’re okay. If I knew you better I might say I need a kiss on my booboo, but let’s not do that.” He laughed. You didn’t know what to do, so you just stood there frozen.

“That was a Joke Natasha. You’re supposed to laugh at one.” Loki said smiling.

“I was pretty sure, that you were going to kill me after that!” You pointed at his crotch.

“Well, you had your reasons. I didn’t quite notice what was going on back there, but I did hear it from some other interns. Why are they making sex jokes?” You really didn’t feel very comfortable to even bring up that word to him, but you had some explaining to do.”

“One guy even has a black eye. You threw that plate with quite some anger…”

 “Well.. Everyone is thinking I’m sleeping with you for A. the whole internship in the first place and B. for extra points. They think this because I AM staying at your guest room. They also say that the other tutors say you don’t get close to anyone really, and now you’re tutoring an intern. And since I’m a woman 1+1 makes 2.” You had a sad expression on your face and you hated the idea of making Loki feel bad.

“Oh! So that’s the reason why everyone’s been acting so weird... Like I said at the interview, you have something that interests me. But that doesn’t mean I want you as my personal little fucktoy like Tony does with his interns. And there was no place anymore at the intern’s wing, so I came up with an idea myself. Some humans are so stupid.” Loki rolled his eyes.

“Well, yeah. I know that, but the other 99,9% that walks here doesn’t.”

“I’m not going to explain myself to those children. And even if we did have a sexual relationship. It would be none of their business.” HE was so goddamn casual with al this sexual stuff, while I almost had a bleeding nose even trying to talk about it. Must be because he has like a thousand years of wisdom in his pretty head. You just stood there with a questioning face.

“I can tell, this isn’t your favorite subject to talk about?”

“No. But just let it go. I hope they’ll stop after what I just did, and if they don’t… I’m going to need those daggers of yours.” Loki smiled.

“That’s my girl.” You could feel a friendship starting to come together.