#i just miss baseball in general so yk

[dreamlandgirlie]

go dodgers!!! (amed rosario)

[yippeeometer]

US RAHHHHHH headcanons for the v special boy day!

RAHHHHH

first off a more foolish person would assume that this holiday would involve peace. they would assume that the joy of independence from tyranny was enough to sedate rivalry. point and laugh wttt fandom this person is wrong

the fact of the matter; at least one person will have to sit in their car and cry when the night is over because they brought a dish that was just relentlessly mocked.

fact of the matter: 90% of the time this is a midwesterner. minnisota brings an ambrosia salad one year and this threatens civil war.

i do hear a lot of misconceptions that texas would immediately start running the grill like the navy; however i believe in the much more obscure principle of alaska running it to get away from people.

'how do u want ur meat' he asks. theres a smile on his face. this is bc he knows it will be burnt either way and he enjoys the idea of setting you up for failure.

cali is banned from hosting bc yk he'd be so insufferable ab having no weed allowed and about 8 states immediately start twitching at the idea of having to do it sober.

speaking of sobriety LORD this day must be difficult for the NE. not for the obvious reason, just bc they hate everyone and their lives and having to hear ab your stupid families. and sports that aren't baseball or basketball. and the sun, and social interaction and overall joy. other than that great day out.

yeah mass is traumatised but i fear its his gay right to loudly judge you like an old woman at a party. someone asks him to stop and he asks why they have no respect for the people that won the war.

does okla object morally to the idea of celebrating a nations birth when he, a native man, knows his people were there for generations beforehand? yes. will he be in attendance every year for the football match he gets way too competitive about despite the fact he's playing against washington (weak and asthmatic) and ohio (home of the browns)? yes

look theres a distinct family unit going on here guys. the south r dads or uncles. midwest is your aunt whos recently divorced and his gotten REALLY into experimental baking because she doesn't miss her husband (she will leave him 10000 voicemails at the end of the night). west is a clean split between youngest cousins that REALLY need to perfect this dance so they'll be allowed a sleepover and your weird aunt who recently came back from vacation as a hippie. northeast transition from weird emo cousin to genuinely insufferable old men in around 30 minutes to an hour (depending on how fast they can drink)

[thecoppersoulbox]

Badly Explaining Every HSR Character's Type

Disclaimer: This is very dumb and some of these are stretches/I just completely gave up so don't take it seriously. Also I'm stopping at 1.6, so no Penacony. Maybe I'll make a sequel in the future.

Under a read-more bc this is a lot of people.

Trailblazer, Physical: Baseball bat hit body, ouch

Trailblazer, Fire: They wanted that really cool imagery of us helping to melt the Eternal Freeze

March 7th, Ice: Her whole thing is she was found in Six-Phased Ice

Dan Heng, Wind: Spear go woosh through the air, it's also called Cloud Piercer which sounds pretty windy to me

Asta, Fire: That spectrum beam looks like it would burn you pretty bad

Arlan, Lightning: I am fairly certain his skill is him electrocuting himself for the extra adrenaline

Natasha, Physical: Massive bullet hit body, ouch

Pela, Ice: I think it's just bc she's with the Silvermane Guards, nothing about her attacks scream "ice" to me

Hook, Fire: Diggertron produces flames (seriously who let her keep that thing)

Serval, Lightning: Music is electrifying (also that's an electric guitar)

Qingque, Quantum: Digital = quantum in HSR and celestial jade tiles are digital (...I'm pretty sure)

Herta, Ice: I guess the diamond is cold...and looks like ice...? Maybe they're linking crystals with ice bc of how they look

Tingyun, Lightning: Yeah I got nothing. Most of her animations don't even have lightning anywhere in them?

Sushang, Physical: Big sword hit body, ouch

Sampo, Wind: Blades go woosh through the air

Himeko, Fire: That massive laser DEFINITELY burns

Clara, Physical: Big robot punch body, ouch

Bronya, Wind: Small bullet go woosh through the air (it's straight up called Windrider Bullet)

Gepard, Ice: The shield he makes is a massive wall of ice like. My god man.

Bailu, Lightning: Resuscitation requires electricity (also water isn't a type but if it was...)

Yanqing, Ice: His swords seem to be made of ice (also he needed the Jingliu parallels)

Welt, Imaginary: If those black holes were real then...wouldn't everything just be gone...? (idk HI3 lore so I might be missing smth)

Seele, Quantum: Girl moves so fast it breaks quantum physics

Jing Yuan, Lightning: Two words. Lightning-Lord.

Silver Wolf, Quantum: Everything she does is digital, also aether editing probably breaks quantum physics too

Luocha, Imaginary: Those spirit-like things in his ultimate just seem imaginary, also he just radiates the colour yellow which doesn't explain anything but it's all I got

Yukong, Imaginary: Gonna be real idk, that bow looks pretty real, I'm kind of wondering why she isn't wind (probably the severe lack of imaginary characters at the time she came out)

Blade, Wind: They had to make it clear he's connected to Dan Heng yk? Also his swords probably go woosh through the air

Kafka, Lightning: Her strings have a similar colour to the lightning icon and so does her general design, it would be weird for her to be anything else. Also there's lightning in her animations so something is producing it

Luka, Physical: Big metal fist hit body, ouch (this boy wants to be fire so bad)

Dan Heng IL, Imaginary: He's basically controlling that water with his mind, right?

Fu Xuan, Quantum: Idk how to word it but. Quantum just makes sense here like I have no questions about it but I can't explain it. Edit: The Matrix of Prescience is a supercomputer tysm for reminding me!!!

Lynx, Quantum: Literally nothing about Lynx feels quantum like her weapon is an ice pick and her healing stuff is physical objects...do you think Lynx and Pela are such good besties that they swapped types?

Jingliu, Ice: Look at that really cool ice sword

Topaz and Numby, Fire: Numby creates so much friction spinning like that it burns the enemy lmao (also the blaster Topaz uses might use lasers? It looks like a mix of money and some sort of beam)

Guinaifen, Fire: Girlie is literally throwing firecrackers at her enemies

Huohuo, Wind: If she waves that flag fast enough she creates a little gust of wind!

Argenti, Physical: Big spear hits multiple bodies, ouch (ignore the roses)

Hanya, Physical: This is the only physical character I can't explain like she's hitting her enemies with ink and chains that didn't exist two seconds ago...I think HYV just don't wanna give siblings the same type but she could've been imaginary

Ruan Mei, Ice: ...Maybe it matches her personality? Or it's a women of the Genius Society thing?

Dr. Ratio, Imaginary: Nobody actually believes the building he's dropping is real, right?

Xueyi, Quantum: This is another one that I can't put into words but just makes sense to me, something about the chains just materialising and the colours

TL;DR - If in doubt, look at their weapon and how they use it, except sometimes that doesn't explain anything either (if that's the case...look at their hair colour maybe...?)

Feel free to offer corrections or further explanations bc obviously I don't have everyone so I'm mostly going off what I can see from their animations

[arche0ps-moved]

can you please tell us more about your cool earthbound (or mother in general) headcanons. . . one's already mentioned are so cool I WANNA KNOW!!! ps YOU ARE COOL IN GENERAL TOO!!!!!!!

OHHH MIKE YOU SCAMP .. TWIRLS MY HAIR!! This could be long so. Under the cut !

okay first guy: ness I love ness.

Ness is a trans kid!! he doesn't know the right terminology for any of it but he knows he never felt like a girl. his family all support him ofc, but Tracy got a little sad thinking ness wouldn't play dollhouse with her anymore (he still totally does)

Ness looooves gross stuff. Bugs, mud, bones, etc. Call me autistic the way I study those bugs (<- ness)

oh also he's autistic 👍 very sensitive to loud noises and the cold, and wears almost the same outfit everyday because 1. different outfit everyday is HARD . 2. He likes his outfit!!

his special interest is baseball :)

him and pokey play on the same Onett baseball team and have an unofficial rivalry with the Fourside Fogies . one time they trapped pokey under the bleachers. it was a whole ordeal (hc from soypeople thank you bestie)

ness was their number one player!! until. yk. giygas. after all that he quit going to school and became a shut in for a good while (he'll be okay)

Paula helps teach him the PK moves!! Fire freeze thunder etc etc. In return him and pu teach her how to heal and such (none of them manage to learn starstorm, though ..)

Ness is overall an overly caring kid. he'll often put others before himself, especially in the line of danger. But he can also be very stubborn if he chooses to (if he's angry, he'll most likely give you silent treatment until he simmers down)

Ness and Paula date in the future :]

ok paula now.

Paula is a transgirl!! she knows the terms bc she's a fast learner (with gifted child syndrome)

When she grows up she most likely takes over the Polestar preschool

Funnily enough, her favorite color isn't pink. It's green!

Her parents are a bit overprotective of her .... Ness and her had to practically beg to go fight Giygas

Much like Ness, she cares a lot for her friends. Unable to heal them with her PSI, she resorts to carrying around lots of healing items for her pals! (And wet towels for Jeff, since he overheats easily)

She doesn't mind any temp, but sweat is an unpleasant sensation for her (it's gross, it smells, and ew, it's wet! Jeff shares the same sentiment)

She isn't a damsel in distress, obviously. She probably would've beaten up Montoli and Carpainter all on her own if she didn't have the brain to accompany her (though, an hour longer in the cage at Happy Happy and she probably would've started a fire ..)

OK JEFF TIME I LOVE JEFF :) copy pasting some jeff-tony hcs from my personal discord teehee

When Jeff couldn't stand in class Tony would take his assignments to the teacher when they both finished (albeit a bit later as Tony took more time on his)

Tony signs the end of the Y in name with a small heart when writing Jeff. Jeff was oblivious to it's meaning till he got older

Tony will sometimes break stuff on purpose when Jeff has nothing to tinker. Just little things that they won't miss if Jeff can't fix them (he always fixes them)

Jeff shares what he doesn't eat with Tony (tony has a bit appetite!)

Jeff carries Tony's bag in his lap when in his chair

Neither of them use air fresheners or perfumes. It irritates Jeff's nose and Tony has asthma. Win!

They don't have the same taste in music but like to listen to each other's music when working in their dorm. They take turns putting in tapes

Jeff prefers classical music .. Tony calls him old for it (it's endearing. He's memorized Jeff's favorite artists)

Jeff falls asleep in class a lot .. tony makes sure to write plenty of notes if he does

Non Tony related ones:

Jeff is autistic! And physically disabled. His legs were injured in the novels boat incident, so he uses a cane(or crutches) and a wheelchair depending on how well he feels

He doesn't like being babied or carried around much, but if it's necessary he'll allow someone to lift him (mostly ness or tony)

Distant relationship with his dad obviously. It gets a bit better but they never get as close as they could

Jeff modifies his chair to have rockets on them. Because it's fun!

Even after getting his prosthetics he'll still use the chair whenever he feels tired

As stated in my fic he hates the heat so so much. He'd rather run around in the snow butt naked than spend a minute at the beach

Okay that's enough Jeff sorry for the favoritism <3 pu time!!

I spell his name as Pu thanks to mysthlarey (thank u bestie)

Probably very stressed. It's hard being the newest king and also 14

His hair is shaved on the sides and tied into a long braid. No reason behind it he just likes it that way tbh

Despite his resting-mean-boy face, he's super sweet under that Princely attitude! (He's got a lot on his shoulders, it's hard to relax)

Much like in game he's very . Uh. Physcially weak. Most people don't expect that because of his "fighter" look, so they don't usually mess with him

He's a picky eater bc of sensory issues. What do you MEAN you guys can eat rice? Yuck! (It tastes fine, but the feeling is .. bad. very bad)

Water enthusiast :) often the one to remind Ness (water hater) to drink some water

Tallest of the group (sorry jeff)

Funnily enough he doesn't grow once he hits his current height. Sooner or later Paula matches him in height and he finds it p funny

Uses his future kingly status to mess around with his friends. (Ex: DEAR NESS. THIS IS THE KING OF DALAAM. COME OKAY WORLD OF WARCRAFT WITH ME OR ELSE I WILL START A WAR WITH EAGLELAND. signed ur bestie xoxoxox :) )

bonus time oh goodness oh me oh my! Random character's!

Tracy uses she/they

Picky uses he/they. they match!

Picky loooves spiders (<- he doesn't know about pokey)

Tony's family actually live in Scaraba- they sent him off to Winters since it has the best school in the 3 major continents (he was eligible, so why not take the chance!)

Pokey and Ness liked to draw comics together :) they're probably super cringey now

Picky, Tracy, Ness, and Pokey all used to walk to school together. Sometimes pokey had to carry picky since he was half asleep

Ness doesn't actually eat trash burgers okay it was ONE TIME you can STOP BRINGING IT UP POKEY

pokey needs glasses due to his bangs fucking up his vision. will he ever get them? probably not

aloysius minch is bisexual. win I guess

[ryuseitai]

guuuhhhh i like having short hair but i aloso loovee having long hair thT im able to like. Do stuff with even tho all i do ever is ponytail but shh but also short hair is lowejey like my soulmate. the love of my life and it makes me able to pass sometimes and just in general makes me less dysphoric But then it take forever to siwtch back to long hair. i have like. kind of a mullet rn but kind of subtle i only have a little bit shaved on the sides Which i also need to trim anyways also i need to trim my bangs and the other side parts but i just dont touch the very back os it gets long, which, it is now. not long long but yk But i kind of miss having just all short hair bc its simpler and while my hairstyle really isnt super.. feminine atm the length doesnt help at alllllll earlier i was tweaking bc i couldnt find a hat to wear to cover up my hair Not even to actually go out anywhere just to go to myrgrammas hosue. just really bad dysphoria today for some reason andits making me miss short hair a lot But ive spent sm time growing the back out and i like havng it like that AND literally just last month i went thru sm bull shit to bleach the ends of my hair so i can have them colorful whenever i want but if i cut my hair hsort all of the bleached part will be gone Sigh. i stlil wanna bleach it one more time i did twice and its still just kind of.. medium orangeish brown bc it started from black. i wnana dye it green but like BRIGHT green so i def wanna bleach again first BUT I CANT Do any of that if i cut it short but i also want it short AAHHHH i just need hats really ive been thinking about this as well for months. i have one hat other than my work hat and i like it but its jlike. pink baseball cap w a rainbow on it REALLY CUTE but 1. doesnt cover all my hair 2. i dont rly wear bright colors very often os it clashes w most stuff i wear. i need a plain black beanie for days like this. if only it could just be possible to have 2 completely diff haircuts interchangeable whenevr i want w.o a wig or extensions

[mwolf0epsilon]

ngl josh reading to kids in his spare time sounds really cute, i bet he'd be a good dad

I made this a little sad but yes, Josh would definitely be a good dad :')

Enjoy!!!

---

[[MORE]]

When he first came across a child model Josh didn't know what to say. He knew there were androids meant to simulate human offsprings but he'd never actually thought he'd meet one himself, or any child for the matter...

As a norm PJ500s did not exist in spaces where humans bellow the age of 16 or 18 congregated. They weren't programmed to teach bellow college program levels and thusly had no social protocols for children. Even privately owned tutor PJ-Series were meant to help with advanced studies on topics like socioeconomics and physics.

Talking to a child wasn't rocket science so Josh had failed terribly at it, if the look Simon had given him was anything to go by.

He'd sounded robotic when he spoke to the poor girl, and frankly he had felt ashamed that he not only frightened her but also couldn't find it in him to be welcoming towards her.

Simon had definitely been very upset with him for upsetting the poor thing...

The second time he met a child android was a little less awkward than the first. He'd practiced with Lucy's help. Loosened up a little on the whole teacher-student relationship protocols that tried to force their way into his general demeanor, and helped Simon settle in a pair of YK500s who had been on their way back to the shop after their mother (their owner) had perished on the ride back home from an evening at the bar. At the time he'd played it off cool, but something in the back of his mind had nagged at him that leaving two small children completely alone (even if they were androids), felt like negligent and reckless behaviour from someone who was trying to be a parent...

Josh had felt somewhat satisfied that he'd managed to work out how to talk to little kids. And some of them liked history, so it had fed them little tidbits of historical trivia he knew. The stuff that was age appropriate and non-violent of course. Simon would be furious if he divulged the need behind inventions like the guillotine or a trebuchet.

The third time he meets a child android isn't a moment he likes to remember. In fact, it's perhaps one of his most darkest moments...

He'd been roaming the streets in the late evening, marveling over the little privacy he got from sneaking out and hiding in plain sight. His model wasn't common and he rarely had left campus, so no one thought to look at the big tall guy with the baseball cap and the ratty jacket. He was just another figure walking through the crowd.

It felt like freedom, even if in the end he was just hiding behind a facade.

Josh had nearly missed it himself as he walked. The tiny figure laying in a heap of trash, completely ignored by those who walked right past him.

He looked like a child, but was met with no kindness or sympathy from the humans who'd grown apathetic towards android-kind. The moment they saw blue staining bellow the boy's nose they'd simply turned a blind eye and carried on marching, as if in an assembly line.

Josh had been revolted by this.

Had been so horrified and disgusted that he'd nearly let his anger boil over.

He'd taken the poor YK400 to Jericho, fueled by a gutteral seething rage that would have incinerated those around him if it had come off of him in waves like pure energy.

He'd taken care of the boy himself, the dark look in his eyes having deterred Simon and Lucy from advancing in his direction.

North hadn't bothered him that day either. Instead she curled up with him when he finally came out from behind the blinding veil of rage against humanity.

He cried like a baby that night, and he'd cry again for every single little boy and girl that came crawling into the derelight freighter that should have otherwise terrified any child.

Anything looked like sanctuary when the adults that promised to love and care for you suddenly decided you were not wanted anymore.

Josh starts teaching the YK-series not long after his third encounter. He does his damn hardest to not go onto the advanced topics right away, instead gradually evolving their classes so that the children can naturally adjust to the level changes.

They're eager learner's, especially Ezra who Josh has grown incredibly attached to since rescuing him. The poor boy attends his classes, but his thirium pump malfunctions cause him tremendous discomfort that require him to take short breaks.

That's all fine, because afterwards Josh will sit with him and tell him bedtime stories he's learned from Simon. He watches over Ezra as he sleeps and feels a comfortable warmth in his chest.

---

The day they leave Simon behind in Stratford is the same day Josh has to say goodbye to Ezra. It was a matter of time before his pump shorted out and Lucy had been watching out for the signs.

She finds him browsing through children's books he'd "borrowed" on his last secret excursion to the outside world, trying to forget that his friend is likely dead and gone by now, when the heavily damaged KL-series pulls him towards Ezra's corner.

The boy is terrified and in terrible pain, begging for his short little life. Josh doesn't cry. He holds the boy tightly and hums softly to him before he shuts down for good.

Lucy tries to comfort him but Josh doesn't look at her and doesn't speak. When North returns, crying over androids she hadn't known for more than a minute, he nearly loses his mind with anger.

He feels like she's betrayed him in some way, but he doesn't voice this. Instead he feeds into the growing argument between the both of them and gets out of dodge when Markus tells them to stop.

He only cries when Simon returns, blue blood splatters on his face and a slight limp to his tired geit.

He cries so hard his processor begins to stall.

Simon hums to him, just as Josh had done in Ezra's final moments.

It doesn't feel fair that children had to be in the crossfire of their fight against human oppression. Sadly life was rarely fair.

---

After the revolution Josh continues to teach the android children at the tower. They're all fond of classes, eager learners that they are, and they especially love the extra curricular activities Simon sets up for them, and Josh's bedtime reading sessions.

He wasn't meant to teach kids but he loves it so much he can't bring himself to give up on his teaching sessions with the YK-series. Even in the heat of political tensions.

The humans couldn't make him hate his profession before, and they certainly couldn't do it now either.

He reads to them as a form of healthy enrichment and childish indulgence, but also to honor the little one he'd lost back in Jericho's ruined carcass.

The one he likely would have adopted as soon as the law permitted, if it weren't for the circumstances that took him away from him.

"You're a big softy, you know that?" North chuckled as soon as she caught him at the end of a reading session. The children had all left to go to bed and he'd finished another chapter of 'Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone' with them.

"You'll find that I have no padding to allow for that." He joked, tapping on his chest and stomach to emphasize on the hardness of his chassis. "Simon's the better hugger."

"You say that because you've never genuinely hugged Markus. His tits are super soft." North grinned mischievously.

"I'm not exactly interested in gropping anyone's... Tits..." He let her drag him away by the arm, smiling as he waved goodbye at some of the stragglers. "The kids are doing good in classes... And they're really liking the book so far. We have a lot of little boys and girls who want to be like Hermione Granger."

"Ever consider adopting?" North suggested.

"If we ever get that far, yes. Cyberlife is fighting us every step of the way though, and some of those politicians are adamant that androids don't need familial units..." He glared angrily at the implications. "Because obviously the YK400s and YK500s don't need parents..."

"Assholes... Well between you and Simon, the kids are good on parents. They've got their big nerd dad and their mother hen."

"What would that make you and Markus?" Josh asked.

"... Cool mom and cool dad?"

"Wow, you suck at this."

"Shut up..." She punched him lightly on the arm.

Josh snorted and carried on walking towards the elevator. He considered North's words and couldn't help smile to himself, a hint of longing in his eyes.

He wouldn't mind a few sets of little tiny feet running around the house...