#i just finished fallout and i stg

[queercodedcowboy]

i wonder what my neighbors think is going on when i scream at the top of my lungs and thump around while doing so every few nights. its cockroaches fyi. radroaches if were being size specific here.

[vault81]

ik i already did smn like this before but im doing it again!!

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[himbos-hotline]

I finished another fanfic. But... I'm afraid to post it. It hurts SO STONKING MUCH.

There is no point in this saga that, at this point, isn't going to break hearts. Not one. I'm trying to write a canon-compliant, storyline-adjacent series about the current Sami and Kevin storyline and there is no world in which writing about them in September doesn't hurt like hell in December.

Also, the part I'm writing now is the direct fallout from the Honorary Uce segment and seriously, there is SO MUCH TRAUMA going on that neither one of them wants to or is prepared to deal with I STG this is the worst thing I've ever written for them and, again, IT'S MEANT TO BE CANON COMPLIANT.

I straight up ABUSE ellipses in this story because there is so much that I want to say about what's going on here that I just CAN'T because it would take the story into dark fic territory. All because that damn segment made my skin crawl and the post-show segment kicked me in the chest hard enough to almost stop my heart.

Stupid me and my stupid ideas. My stupid notion that "what if we could see that friendship that never got explained? What if we could look at what was going on when the Bloodline WASN'T around?" Why did I ever think this was a good idea, Samuel? Why must I hurt myself like this?

so we're both hurting ourselves with fics? I found the notes to the end of the hairtie fic and got heart bunched by it and now I must work on it.

[stuffedeggplants]

hullo pls can you tell me about your clone ocs?? any and all of them would be just lovely :D

Lieutenant Six! He’s a supply officer in Coruscant Guard Aviation Support Squadron 66. (They handle logistics and are also an OC squadron! So they don’t have pilots but deal with maintenance, parts, ordnance, etc..) Conveniently he’s CT-60-3102 which also adds up to six- twice. He likes making the kind of jokes that are usually way too obvious for most people to actually make, indulging in clone humor, and has a very optimistic personality. He’s creative with language (and chewing people out lol), but does not excel at lateral thinking and is routinely defeated by bureaucracy and his inability to think outside the box, (but that’s what he has friends for.) Very nice guy, will absolutely go out of his way to help you, but struggles with coming up with creative solutions on his own.

Trooper Eyes-up! He’s on the younger side and also in the Coruscant Guard where he works at the detention center. He got his nickname in very unfortunate and embarrassing circumstances wherein commanders Fox and Thorn caught him doing something he absolutely should not have been doing and told him to bring his “eyes up here, shiny!” So they gave him his name which he’ll never live down. He’s curious, enjoys reading, and is prone to pushing boundaries when he shouldn’t. But he’s also honest and owns up to his screw-ups and is kind of resigned to routinely getting shit for the nonsense he gets himself into, but people love him for it because the fallout is amusing. He was unfairly blamed for bringing granite slugs into one of the barracks (which then proceeded to eat the duracrete walls and cause a problem that only flame troopers could ultimately fix.) He’s good at reading people emotionally but his risk vs reward calibration is a little off. In worlds where Order 66 happens, Eyes-up never participates though the rest of his unit does- this is because his latest screw-up put him on SUFR duty (”sweeping up the fucking rain”), Fox telling him to stay outside in the rain and keep sweeping until it was completely dry. Well the ground was still wet when Order 66 was activated, and Eyes-up’s visceral fear of upsetting the commanding officer of the entire Coruscant Guard overrode his in-built compliance with Order 66, so he stayed and swept up the rain while his brothers went on to worse and darker things. :(

Corporal Corr: the Coruscant Guard Corpsman who ‘mysteriously’ has not managed to promote to sergeant (and likely never will....👀) He works under Thorn in the Diplomatic Service, is a great connoisseur of alcohol, and goes extremely hard for the Coruscant Guard (and nurtures a rivalry with 501st guys whenever they go planet-side for whatever.) He’s very serious about the concept of CG brotherhood and becomes a fixture in Diplomatic Service initiation rites (where shinies are ‘officially’ inducted into the group after their first milestone) to the point where he pretty much leads them. Part of this involves shinies mixing a drop of their blood into red paint, and then their older brothers in the CG mix in their own blood as well. The ex-shinies then use the paint for their armor. Corr has been implicated in brewing his own barracks moonshine which Fox and Thorn let him get away with just long enough to let him finish the process so they could see how good the final product actually was when they confiscated it. Corr also has an agreement with Toast clone, where he trades alcohol for the bread that Toast makes in a crematorium oven that’s non-operational on official records but which is very much operational in a hushed, practical sense. (He also has Toast score the bread surface with the pattern of the CG symbol because he can’t help himself, and has tattoos of the CG armor armbands and legbands actually over his arms and legs. Some might describe Corr as overzealous, but he believes you need passion and strong bonds in life or you have nothing. [This guy is also kind of a joint OC with my friend who runs a Coruscant Guard blog here!]

Are you sick of the Coruscant Guard yet? Well I have 12 more guardsmen alone where this came from and 13 if you count this next guy; I wasn’t kidding when I said I had half a platoon worth of OCs. 

Kov, rank to be determined, pronounced like “cove.” (I might change the spelling to better reflect that.) He’s in one of the Special Tactics Groups of the Coruscant Guard, a unit which I made up to work kind of like a SWAT team. He and his STG are also part of a designated force that can respond extremely quickly to developing situations and get there first to deal with the trouble before anybody else comes in. His STG’s motto is “made to kill, decanted to die” and he has a target tattooed over the side of his face to go with it. (They get shit from non-CG and units that think all they do is give out parking tickets and stand around looking pretty in the Senate building- these guys very much do not do that.) His face is very expressive, and he’s decisive, straightforward, and unfortunately comes off as kind of low on empathy. He wants people to see him as very pragmatic though he’s actually rather idealistic and kind of naive about certain things. He and his best friend are very interested in plants- Kamino didn’t have any, and they’re generally rare on Coruscant. There’s something calming and ‘constant’ about them that he enjoys. He likes taking photos of the ones they find together and looking them up later to learn about nature/biology. Kov learns he really likes children, but is uncertain/a little afraid to let himself interact with them because he’s worried about what sort of influence he’d have on them (and on a deeper level whether he’d learn from them that he’s not actually the person he thinks he is or tries to be.) He and a Twi’lek woman who immigrated from Ryloth sort of fall into a relationship without meaning to, and they both learn a lot from each other and grow as people. (I’m planning on having her take him to a botanical garden that he had no idea existed, and sometime during their visit he realizes he loves her even. He has trouble putting it into words in his mind, but he definitely knows.) 

Okay last one, I’m sorry! :( 

Lieutenant Rakia of the 212th, part of Slick’s direct chain of command. He goes through Geonosis with his best friend and batchmate Arak. When they were cadets on Kamino, and Arak’s helmet saved his life during a training accident but was partially shattered, and Rakia’s random compulsion to bend down and pick up a shard of the helmet inadvertently saved his life too during this incident. Arak and Rakia kept the small plastoid chunk, carved designs over its surface, and exchanged custody of it for years. Before Geonosis Arak gave it to Rakia. Rakia survives but somehow can’t find the chunk where it’s supposed to be in his utility belt, like it just disappeared, and Arak goes missing and is presumed KIA during the battle. On a deep internal level, Rakia has similar realizations to Slick, but because his personality is different he takes that in another direction. He doubles down on a deep trust and faith in the Republic and the Jedi because he’s subconsciously afraid of what it means about his life and purpose if those things are not the things he should believe in. He sees that they’re all cogs in a machine, but his response is that that’s a good thing. He finds something very personally significant about the idea that all those tiny cogs come together to become something much bigger. So his own internal tendencies towards a collective approach and trusting the leadership he was instructed to trust all his life just get kicked up to higher levels after Geonosis in the face of his anxieties.  

In normal speech he’s casual and kind of playful, but when he gets angry he becomes overly explicit/didactic about things and snaps a lot to the point where he can be condescending even without meaning to be. Rakia has an artistic side but doesn’t get to explore it much at first. He’s clean-shaven and lets his curls grow out a bit because he likes how he looks that way, but otherwise looks like everyone else and doesn’t want to visually distinguish himself from his brothers too much besides the slightly longer hair. He wants to be someone others look up to and tries to ignore/deny parts of himself that he doesn’t feel fit that ideal image he wants others to see. Part of that ties into him really struggling with grief but not even allowing himself to contend with it and find closure, stuffing it back down and ignoring it to negative effect. It also ties in to him resisting discovering himself as an individual beyond a certain point/his comfort zone because he’s afraid that will isolate himself from his brothers, but resisting that (and continuing to deny his grief/keep it bottled down) ends up doing that exactly, leading him to feel cut off and alone in certain ways that compound the problem in a bad spiral. (He gets out of it, I promise.) So because Slick is busy developing his own radical ideas and solutions which he can tell no one about (on top of feeling like he’s the only one who’s cottoned on to something nobody else can see,) that’s isolating too, and he and Rakia understand each other a lot better than they think they do in some respects, regardless of their disagreements. 

I know you didn’t ask for a six paragraph essay. Sorry I just really love these guys.😅

[kumomist]

ahhh just finished tua 2, it was great.

fiiive you cant fool us, you love your family too much even as you try to threaten them into stopping the apocalypse with you, all your threats are liiiiies

there were SO many bonding moments between all the sibs, though they felt like they were missing something. maybe character depth i guess?? idk how to describe it. but i stiLL LOVE THEM ALL

(wish there was more ben, like BADLY. why cant they let him interact with his sibs directly. that glimse during the nuculear war fallout was a big fat LIE and then they killed him more and if they dont bring him back as he was i stg-)

honestly i dont feel like there’s much to analyze from tua as a whole. its just sib conflicts interfering with you know, just stopping the apocalypse, again, dodging the commission’s attempts to stop them, and five having to wrangle his family into working together to save the world and stay alive, and god five loves them so much, all he wants is for his family to stay alive and together

its really sad thinking how so many of their issues they also pushed onto their father? it felt like meeting them made him feel responsible for training them so hard. also he would have still been with grace if diego hadn’t talked to her, especially considering how the whole thing is a misunderstanding addled with diego’s new fixture on kennedy and thinking of his father as the enemy

me whenever five started talking about kennedy assassination: dammit five just tell them you were the shooter already, think of how many of diego’s current issues you would solve, five. five please for the love of god-

i have so much confusion on reginald now i cant even understand how to put it in words. like, what the what and also wha

but at least it makes sense why the umbrella academy are so messed up. they were seven superpowered children raised by a robot maid, a talking chimpanzee, and also a billionaire whatever the heck reginald is.

[ziracona]

Pfft poor Philip. Do you have any plans for fics after ILM? I love your writing and I'd love to see more.

Yes and no. I’m sure I will at some point! But not for sure when I’ll start. Life’s so complicated rn, & there’s just so much going on. Life is. Life is hard, man.

Let’s see, though. I’m going to edit all of ILM as I re-read it myself for the first time start-to-finish, but that’s not new, it’s just QA updates. For new writing, I got a really sweet comment last year unexpectedly on the Fallout 4 fic I have on hiatus, so I mean to finish it for that one user sometime in the not-too-distant-future. I also have part of the prequel to ILM, Signifying Nothing, which is about Vigo/Alex/Benedict/Philip, especially Philip & Vigo, and the attempt to beat the Entity that group made that is already written, & do for sure plan to write more/all of that and post it sometime. I really like those characters & the story & it’s important to me, and to ILM even though it doesn’t make a ton of visible appearances in it.

I’ve had ideas for one shots or shorter fics too (although nothing I have planned is as long as In Living Memory was lol.) A Joey-Quentin one, another about Philip & Claudette being cute, one w David & Laurie meeting differently (there would all be ILM au dbd one-shots, not the same continuity/timeline). Have a currently one-shot cute dbd Quentin gets kidnapped/adopted by Anna the first night he shows up in the realm & has an out of body experience & hard time but they slowly begin to better understand & help each other fic up on AO3 already that I wrote for my sister as a Christmas gift that I might add more to & update. I am writing a Whodunnitmafia fic rn which is only uploaded to my side blog (I love it, & I have like 90 pages 😂, but it’s like—Nancy Drew video game AU fic for a game 13 people played and only 6 even remember period, so it’s basically just for me & not going up on AO3 even though I’m really liking the story). That’s a for fun one.

Oh. There’s also like, an idea for a post ILM fic I have? Not even sure if it’s canon, bc it started out as me wanting a fixer for my own damn canon (which makes it sound like ILM ends tragically—if you haven’t finished, stg that’s not the case. It’s fixer for the prequel, not ILM lol), but the more I mess w it the more it takes shape & I like it? So who knows. Involves post-Jane survivors and takes place several years in the future. I’m still unsure but maybe. We’ll see. Will probably do like, litttle scenes abt ILM characters at some point bc I’ll miss them? Dunno if I’ll make like a scraps compilation on AO3 or just upload here or what, but that’ll probably happen eventually.

I really don’t know, other than that, though. Finishing ILM was nice but still feels unreal to me, I’ve been so put off by a lot of the Archives stuff that even though I’m actively ignoring it all, I’m tired. Tired and kinda sad, abt the game, bc I love it a lot & don’t like watching that happen. Makes motivation more difficult. I think I’ll probably just rest from writing for a couple weeks or however many days it takes my brain to get mad at me for not writing, and then go with my gut. I definitely plan to finish The Nuclear Reaction for that one nice person, & to write Signifying Nothing sometime not super far in the future though.

[readbythestarlight]

c2e21 reaction:

THAT D&D BEYOND AD WAS SO COOL???

SOMEONE GET ME AN ANIMATED CRITICAL ROLE SHOW PLZ???

“Can we all just cry all night?”

“It wouldn’t be Critical Role if we didn’t!”

This Febron/Vebron/whateveron guy is a creeeeeeep

Kiri sleeping with her dagger SHES SO PRECIOUS

“Be with you in about an hour.”

pause, then everyone:

“An hour?!”

Caleb no omg

They are such children

GUEST STAR GUEST STAR GUEST STAR

“You’re blue!! :O”

“You’re not :)”

She’s so jittery and jumpy

Calianna is a nice name

“Is that you’re daughter?”

F: “...yeah.”

Nott, clearly choking on the words: “yeah, that’s.... that’s my dad...”

Kiri just echoing random things is so fucking cute

Oh daaaaamn she’s got scales

“Do you worship the Platinum Dragon by chance?”

Molly, lying through his teeth: “Oh yeah! Absolutely.”

“I’m like 1/10 dragon”

“You sure you’re just a tenth?”

FEBRON STOP GOD YOURE SUCH A FUCKING CREEP

The Kiri-Cali exchange of names so cute omg

Frumpkin and Kiri are gonna be the death of me

Fjord and Cali bonding over their anti-cat issues

Nott is constantly so proud of Caleb and bragging about him to everyone and it makes me cry

“Bren”

“Jester Fancypants”

I like how Fjord is like “you’d better pay us for our help” like damn they are So Mercenary

Nott’s gonna steal that charm thing for Caleb

“I’ll write a release form really fast!” Guys omg

“This may be really obvious but if you haven’t picked up on it already we’re kind of a pack of assholes” I feel like Caleb just always tells everyone this

Kiri please be careful

“You don’t have any dragon blood in you, do you?”

“Uh, nein.”

“Nine. Nine dragons.”

Beau @Jester: “I’m trying to wingman for you here!”

Fjord: “What are you talking about?”

Beau ships FjordJester pass it on

They wandered their way into the Fire Swamp from the Princess Bride only instead of fire jets it’s pollen jets

Now we just have to wait for the ROUSes

“Is it flammable, Mr. Creepy Pervert?” I’m crying

3 d12?? Daaaamn witch bolt is cool!

Are they bone charms I bet they’re bone charms and I don’t like it

KNEW IT I KNEW IT

If there’s a swamp witch or some shit I stg Matt...

On the one hand I want them to be smart and not mess with it but on the other hand I’m glad they’re being smart

“Here lies Salty Pete”

BEAU you should have STOPPED him xD

Cali bouncing Febron up and down mid air lol

Uh oh swamp shadow monsters?

...I’m trash I want them to fight an ogre in this swamp

I like how they tried to avoid the monster and came across it anyway

Beau and her ball bearings

Gross troll

lol poor Kiri don’t tell her to hush Cali!

FJORD DONT YOU TOUCH KIRI

“I’m disappointed in you, Mr. Fjord.”

“That means literally nothing to me.”

Something about this troll is legit freaking me out and making me uncomfortable Matt how do you do this?

I haaaaate stalker type monsters who pick off stragglers and drag them back to their lairs 0/10

Yasha immediately like “okay let’s put all the little ones in the middle, round them all up here we go” to protect them from the trolls

“so you haven’t actually gone past these...?”

“fuUUUCK NO” okay Febron is funny when he’s not being a pervert

lol Jester introducing Cari to the Traveler and Fjord just being like plEASE JESTER STOP JESTER

“Let me introduce you. This is Jester. Jester, this is a dead body.”

Just this whole thing with talking to the body it’s hilarious also Kiri continues to be adorable

“Swamp fish men from under the ground” they gonna fight the creatures from the black lagoon there we go

“Beau are you writing this down?” Laura you don’t even have to ask it’s Marisha of course she is

“If it bleeds we can kill it” KIRIIIIII

fuck the troll got Febron ajalajaldjalsjaldjslala i haaaaate the creepy troll

I like how Matt deliberately had Febron move back to have that happen and Nott figured it out like .2 seconds before the troll grabbed him

Beau I know you’re a melee fighter but he sprays acid don’t TOUCH HIM

Daaaamn Febron died horribly and painfully. I almost feel bad for him. He was a creep but I don’t think he deserved that.

BEAU IS OUT wtf Beau stay away from things you shouldn’t touch you idiot I love you don’t die

“Yeah I cast regret” pfft Fjord

FUCK FUCK FUCK

MATT DONT KILL YOUR WIFE

god I’m so scared omg

don’t kill beau I love her

Kiri holds her dagger and shouts “fuck” same

HEALING WORD GO JESTER

LOOK AT JESTER SHE IS *THE* CLERIC

BEAU IS ALIVE I CANNOT BELIEVE

BLESS YOU CALI

GUYS LET THE TROLL GO FFS

Nott sending it prone with her dumb joke spell thing

lol them rushing back to the dead guy like “oh yeah we were talking to a dead dude!”

Caleb calling Beau his good friend is sweet and cute

As of right now I feel like the guest star might have been better off during another week? Aside from saving Beau that hasn’t been much for him/Cali to do? Although hopefully that changes as we get to the last bit of the episode here

N: “I feel like Caleb could have done it.”

J: “Caleb, can you...?”

C: “...No, no, I can’t...”

N: “He’s just being modest.”

C: “???? Noooooo I’m not???”

Nott vigorously pulls on the branch

Why do we always send Nott down into the creepy dangerous places

Fish people oh god

Please be careful when dropping Frumpkin

Kiri whispering “kill people?” like they’re going to make her a gleeful little murderer

“Sup, fish-fucks?”

“It’s fishkabobs!”

Yayyyy Fjord! Except there’s definitely more than 3

MOLLYMAUK DONT ugh did he cast “friends” on Cali sigh

Caleb is being sweet to Cali awww

Kiri just stabbing the dead body like “I kill people!” I cryyyyyy she’s so cute

WHY do they keep finding manacles?? Is Matt being a tease or is that somehow gonna be significant??

Nott don’t try to steal the bowl

The theme of this campaign has been manacles and skeletons

Yooooooooo Fjord’s patron is talking to him

Jester/Laura gets so worried about Fjord it’s so cute

Laura is ALSO like “NOTT AND CALEB STOP STEALING PEOPLE’S THINGS” like when Caleb stuck the bowl in the satchel she made such a frustrated face

I’m slightly frustrated too, tbh, but if Caleb tells the TEAM about it, because he’s like… concerned that it’s a really bad thing, I’ll be fine

If he just tries to keep it to himself and Nott I’ll be disappointed

God I’m so anxious about the fallout that I know is coming over Caleb keeping the bowl

Literally so anxious

It took me a week to finish the episode because I don’t liiiiiike what I’ve heard I’m so exhausted by the constant mistrust

Hnnnnnn okay Beau tho what gives you the right to make the choice to give Cali the bowl of Caleb can’t decide NOT to give it to her??

Also thank you, Cali, you’re sweet and I’m glad you’re not being angry with Caleb

Cali was a good sweet guest character and I’d like to have her come back

Aw Cali and Jester pen pals 5ever

Okay that wasn’t QUITE as painful as fandom’s reaction made me think it would be. Definitely not worth all the argument and fuss.

Although I’m pretty sure Nott may be getting ready to

Anyway here’s my reaction a week late and just in time for the next episode lol