#i just don't care because that’s for future me to handle and i'm still current me so whatevs

[chuuyanaurkahara]

holy shit i just realised that azrael is so tall in comparison to dani, he could literally kneel down and still would be some centimetres taller than them😭😭

[lucy90712]

kinda sad but reader distancing herself from jude bc she’s pregnant and don’t know how to tell him and he’s really scared bc he thinks she’s gonna leave him

A/n: I had to give this a happy ending as I have far too much angst to write that I needed a pick me up

Do it. Just do it. 

I have to keep telling myself those few words. In front of me sits a pregnancy test that I can't get myself to take as I don't want to know the answer. Jude and I have always been really careful as he doesn't want kids, I don't mind either way but because he doesn't want them we always try to be super safe. Despite that for the last few weeks I've just not felt right I've been feeling really nauseous and my period is now a week late which really only means one thing I just didn't want to believe it. As much as I know I'm almost definitely pregnant I don't want to take the test as that will confirm it and then I'll have to deal with the consequences.

How would I tell Jude? Would he leave me? Can I raise a baby on my own? All of those questions swirled round my brain as I still just stared at the test. Jude will definitely not be happy but if I am pregnant I don't want to get rid of the baby as I don't think I could handle all the emotions that come with that. If I don't get rid of the baby I can definitely see Jude breaking up with me which I understand he doesn't want kids and he's just starting out his career at Real Madrid he won't want a baby to look after so I'll probably be on my own in a city I don't know with no support. 

It got to the point that all of the questions were starting to eat away at me so to forget about them I decided just to take the test. What no one tells you about taking a pregnancy test is that the few minute wait for the result feels like a century I swear I was pacing back and forth forever before the screen displayed the result. I chose to take a digital test as it would tell me how many weeks I was as that's something I wanted to know too but then I realised that knowing how far along I am will make it feel a whole lot more real. There was no surprise when I finally looked at the test and it said pregnant 4-5 weeks. 

Finally seeing it confirmed made it impossible to hold back my tears any longer. Instinctively my hand went to my stomach as I thought about how in a few short months I will have a baby the baby that is currently growing inside me. The tears were a mix of happiness as somehow I was actually happy to know I was pregnant and anxiety as I have no idea what the future holds. 

~~~~~~~~~~

It has been a month since I found out I was pregnant and I'm now 10 weeks along. A few weeks back I went for my first ultrasound and got to see the baby and make sure everything was ok which it was. Jude still doesn't know, I've tried to tell him so many times but I just can't do it I either chicken out or the moment just doesn't feel right. I know I need to tell him soon as I'm already starting to develop a small bump which will only get bigger and sometimes I think Jude gets a bit suspicious when I won't eat certain things I usually love as I know they will make me sick. 

Over the past month I have definitely been a lot more distant with Jude which has meant he hasn't noticed when I've had really bad sickness days and that I have a small bump growing. It's hard hiding such a big secret from him which is part of why I've been so distant because I just want to tell him and for us to be a happy family but I know it won't go that way and I can't bare the thought of that. I love Jude so much and I don't want to ruin our relationship but I know at some point I'll have to tell him and deal with whatever heartbreak comes along with that. 

No one apart from me knows about my pregnancy not even my parents or my friends I have kept it a complete secret. Today though I'm seeing my friends and I know they are getting a bit suspicious as when we go out I'm always tired and I don't drink anymore. We aren't doing much today just going for brunch so I got up after Jude left for training and went to where we were supposed to meet. Once everyone was there we went in and got a table and I lasted less than a minute before the smell of someone's food made me feel so nauseous that I had to run to the bathroom. My best friend joined me to make sure I was ok but I knew she wasn't convinced when I said I was fine. 

"Are you ok?" The rest of the group asked 

"Yeah I'm fine" I said 

"What's going on girl you've been acting weird for a while now" my best friend said 

"Ok you guys can't say anything to anyone but I'm pregnant I found out a month ago and I've been hiding it because Jude doesn't want kids and I don't know how to tell him" I admitted 

None of them really knew what to say they all knew that Jude didn't want kids and a baby was never supposed to be part of our lives so they were as shocked as I was. After the initial shock they all started giving me advice and telling me everything would be fine. They all tried to reassure me that Jude wouldn't leave me when he found out but they did say I need to tell him at some point soon and I agree but it's hard to find the right words to say. 

Once I got back home I just sat in silence thinking about life and how I got to this point. I was so consumed with my thoughts that I didn’t hear the front door opening or Jude calling my name as he entered the house with increased panic when I didn’t reply. I only came back to reality when he was stood in front of me catching his breath after I nearly gave him a heart attack. There was a lot of staring at each other as I tried to find something to say while he tried to read me and work out what I was thinking. 

“Love are you ok and before you tell me you’re fine I know you’re not you’ve been acting strange for a while and I just want to know what I can do to make things better” he said 

Hearing him say that was too much for me I just burst into tears right in front of him. His arms made their way around me and he tried to calm me down but that didn’t help. This last month I’ve held back all of my emotions about this whole situation and now they are coming out all at once and I can’t hold them back any longer. I tried to tell him but the words couldn’t escape my mouth so instead I grabbed his hand and took him upstairs with me. I kept my pregnancy test and ultrasound pictures hidden away in my wardrobe so I found them and just placed them in Jude’s hands. This isn’t how I wanted to tell him but I think it’s the only way I can do it without having another breakdown. 

“What is this?” He asked 

“I’m pregnant” I said 

“I’m sorry I know you don’t want kids and we are always careful I don’t know how it happened and I just I’m just sorry” I rambled 

“Hey it’s ok calm down how long have you known?” He asked 

“I’ve known for a month and I’m 10 weeks now” I said 

“Wow we are going to be parents” he said hugging me tightly 

“Wait you aren’t mad” I questioned 

“No of course I’m not mad I’m actually really happy I know I said I didn’t want kids but more recently I started to change my mind especially seeing you with all the guys kids it made me want that with you I couldn’t be happier right now” he said 

“So you aren’t going to leave me?” I asked 

“Of course not I can’t wait to go through this whole journey with you I’m just sad I haven’t been there for you until now” he said 

Hearing that was such a relief but not at all what I expected. I’ve always been told things happen for a reason and this is one of those things I guess. Naturally Jude had a lot of questions so I told him everything like everything I know about the baby and how I’ve been feeling as he wanted to know how I’ve been coping. It felt so good to finally tell him everything and he seemed so genuinely happy which allowed me to actually think about how excited I am too as that’s something I’ve pushed away until now. 

After a long conversation we both went silent and just took a minute to take in what has just happened. As we sat there Jude’s hand made its way to my shirt which he lifted up slightly and just rested his hand on my tiny bump. I watched as the smile on his face got even bigger than it was before I could see him look at my almost non existent bump with so much love that it almost made me cry. This whole thing doesn’t seem anywhere near as scary now that I know Jude is here to support me and I already know he’s going to be the best dad if he loves our baby this much already. 

[ireadwithmyears]

Hi! Would you be able to write something for the clones (any of them) with a reader who has a guide dog. I've been running into a lot of issues with people trying to distract her and borderline harassing us (the president of my university follows us around with his unleashed dog running up to us, someone grabbed her nose when we were on a bus and then screamed at us, I'm a biology/genetics major so we get some subtle discrimination in academic opportunities like research projects, etc). Also I don't currently live somewhere with public transportation so I have to take Uber to get anywhere which is a whole other nightmare (a driver dropped us off at the wrong location and I was stuck in a sketchy part of town for 45 minutes while drivers kept denying us a ride). Maybe something with how the clones would comfort/handle their SO dealing with these things. Obviously you don't have to write about all of these scenarios, just some ideas

You don't have to of course, but I figured it was worth an ask:)

Looking Out for You:Part 1

Pairing: Commander Fox/fem Reader

Visually impaired reader masterlist

Word count: 4.1 K

Tags/warnings: Visually impaired reader, meet cute, grumpy x sunshine vibes, denial of feelings(Fox falls first, he falls hard, and he denies it every single step of the way because he’s Fox), guide dog cuteness, brief mention of ableism(this chapter is pretty tame, but in future installments, I intend to explore these elements more deeply, specifically as they pertain to service dog users. These topics aren’t always the most comfortable to discuss. But I feel they are important to bring awareness to)

Summary: Making the transition from your small, rural homeworld to Coruscant already promises to be tough. But when you’re employed to work at the Senate buildings directly under senator Organa and you’re also a guide dog user, things quickly become more complicated, in a variety of ways. Luckily, you seem to have caught the eye of a certain Marshal commander, who swears up and down that he’s not falling in love with you, but who, regardless, always has your back, and is always looking out for you.

A.k.a. 

The three times Fox makes sure that you get home safely. Plus the one time he ends up following you inside

Authors note: Hii anon. I was so happy to hear from you and received this request. As a fellow guide dog user, I have so many different experiences that I feel are worth sharing, so that more people are aware of the trials we face because as amazing as it is that we have these incredible animals, it isn’t always just a nice walk in the park. Which leads me to my next point. Because of all of these experiences that I want to highlight, this 1shot quickly evolved into a four part series, to give it the proper breathing room that I feel it deserves. I hope that’s okay, and I hope you still like this one. If you’d like to message me privately so that I can make sure you’re tagged in each subsequent update, please do. I’d be happy to do that

The first time it happens, Fox is admittedly running on his default, which is to say in plain terms that he is annoyed.

“Why is this my problem?”

Fox winces upon hearing the barely concealed snarl in his own voice through his helmet speakers. He could have phrased that better. He should have at least taken the courtesy to add “with all due respect” when leading into that sentence, even if both he and the trooper who has the misfortune of being at the other end of the line are both fully aware that he doesn’t intend to sound respectful in the slightest.

There’s a pause, a hesitation on the other end of the coms, which causes Fox to silently berate himself for his initial sharp tone. He reminds himself, as he does about 500 times daily, that he needs to be more careful with it.

This warning, for some reason, always falls on deaf ears. But still, Fox wagers that he at least keeps trying, and who knows, maybe one of these days, it’ll actually stick. It probably won’t.

“It’s just that the issue is occurring at the entrance closest to your office, sir,” the trooper begins before rushing to add, “but if you’re busy, we can send—”

“Don’t bother,” Fox sighs. “I’m already on my way there.”

Maybe he shouldn’t be on such a high horse, but really, being sent to investigate a loitering complaint is far above what he, as a marshall commander, should be doing. Despite this though, he privately admits that he’s been looking for an excuse to stand up from his desk chair and stretch his legs. Maybe if he’s lucky, he'll manage to shake off the aching twinge in his left shoulder, hunched from filling out a last-minute stack of crime reports that he had been on the scene of, all from the previous night between the hours of 1 to 3 in the morning. So really, he rationalizes, can anyone blame him for being more than a little bit pissed off at the interruption? 

Maybe it’s a sign that he needs a refill on his caf. 

He rounds the corner and, with what is in hindsight probably more force than is necessary, smacks a hand against an access panel. The door slides open, and a cool breeze hits him as he steps outside into the open air.

His eyes scan through the visor of his helmet, and to his annoyance he doesn’t see the suspected loiterer that he had been warned of, at least not at first. 

Sighing, he steps further out and past the awning above the entrance. Though the air is cool, the sun still shines, and the slight glow causes his eyes to catch on the gloss of your hair as you walk past, eyes nervous as they flick around. Sensing his presence, you pause, shoulders stiffening slightly as you turn to face him with trepidation. Fox also takes notice, his eyes widening in momentary surprise when he observes the guide dog harnessed at your left side, looking up at you with big brown eyes, as if silently trying to understand your sudden hesitance.

You, of course, have every reason to be suspicious of any unannounced or unidentified presence in your vicinity, especially now that you’re living on Coruscant. But, if you’re honest, you’re already on edge, and even though it’s still morning, the day has promised to be shit if the beginning of it is any indication.

Senator Organa isn’t in the habit of firing his junior staff for small mistakes like this, you remind yourself. Still, the thought, no matter how many times you’ve repeated it like a mantra at this point, doesn’t manage to calm your growing nerves, because regardless you’re still lost, and you’re still running late. You silently curse the pitfalls of being blind and using a ride-sharing service, and then you have to restrain yourself from cursing aloud when your eyes land on the silhouette parked a few meters in front of you.

You don’t have much vision. But with what you do have, it’s enough to deduce bright, contrasting colors. And the red splotches against white armor has you stopping dead in your tracks, because within the span of two seconds, a cold clarity settles within your stomach, because the red and white armor is distinctly and unmistakably that of a Coruscant Guard member, the visor of his helmet tilted, looking no doubt with suspicion directly at you.

Resisting the urge to bemoan the shortage of orientation and mobility droids designed to assist with transitions like this—which would have ensured that you would have been able to smoothly get yourself out of this situation in the first place—you bring your guide dog to heel before gesturing for her to sit, then slowly and hesitantly raise your eyes to the trooper, already feeling a mix of anxiety and guilt stirring in the pit of your stomach.

There’s a small sound from his helmet, a hesitation as he seems to clear his throat before speaking. 

“Personal Senatorial aides aren’t permitted to use this entrance,” he says, gesturing to the badge on the lanyard that hangs around your neck. 

He speaks as if this is a reminder that he’s given more than once, which you’re sure he has. Still, there’s an underlying sharpness to it that makes you jump despite your efforts not to react. 

“I, I know,” you say, swallowing before rushing to continue. “I didn’t mean to be dropped off here, sir. I took a Speedershare to get here this morning, and I didn’t realize the driver dropped me off at this entrance until I got out, and by that point it was too late, and I should have asked to verify which one he was going to but—”

“Hey, easy. Slow down.”

The trooper steps closer to you, and it’s only then that you register that you’ve been rambling, your anxiety ratcheting up with each word. Now that you’re silent, you can feel the way your heart is pounding. You’ve seen the Guard around, of course, but you’ve never really interacted with any of them. He’s tall, you realize as he stands in front of you and you look up into the visor of his helmet. Tall and broad, and you were already nervous before he showed up. 

But his hands are raised, in supplication or as an offering of peace, you’re not sure. But regardless, he doesn’t seem on the verge of scolding you further for your silly mistake, which is good, because your nerves are still so frayed from getting out of your ride only to realize that you had no idea where you were, and that apart from knowing that you were somewhere at the Senate building, you were effectively lost and alone. A scolding, delivered with just the right amount of displeasure, would probably be enough to make you start crying, which would make this day go from being the worst to certifiably irredeemable.

“Speedershare isn’t always the most reliable service. Your employer is Senator Organa,” he says, eyes once again scanning over your badge. “I’m sure he could arrange an alternate transportation service that is much more consistent and professional for you to use.”

“I don’t want his charity,” you say, and you can’t help the hard edge that creeps into your voice when you speak.

But really, you don’t. You know that he could, and knowing Senator Organa, he would be happy to do so. But it’s unnecessary. You grew up needing extra accommodations and things that, despite your teachers’ constant stream of reassurances, always made you feel singled out. 

You’re an adult now, and you don’t want that. You don’t need his charity, his pity, or to be added to his ever-growing list of things to worry about at the beginning and end of each day—an item to be checked off. 

As far as you’re concerned, the best thing you can do for the both of you is to keep this to yourself, and you’ll figure out how to manage sooner or later.

Fox takes a step back, able to recognize your quick deflection of his suggestion as a sign that he’s slightly overstepped, and he nods, glancing towards the door.

“Well,” he says, forcing his voice to sound lighter. “I suppose I could let you off the hook this once and let you use this entrance.”

“Thank you,” you say, before hesitantly adding, “I, I’m not familiar with the route to get to Senator Organa’s office from where we are. Would you, I mean, you don’t have to if you’re busy, but—”

“I’ll take you there,” he cuts you off, finality in his voice. “Do you, uh, need a guide or anything?”

Fox internally kicks himself for not knowing how to handle a situation like this, but you give your head a small shake, which allows him a moment of relief. 

“The color on your armor is bright,” you respond, and for the first time in this interaction, you smile. He can’t help but admire the way it seems to transform you, your previous nerves and worry disappearing like the sun breaking through the clouds. It’s quite lovely, he observes, and then internally kicks himself just a bit harder as punishment for that traitorous thought. 

Useless, he scolds. Unnecessary. But it’s already been thought, and he can’t take it back. He’s grateful for the helmet concealing his face, hiding the way his lips repeatedly twitch in an effort to turn upward as he hears you, your voice giving a soft, encouraging command, and the slight pitter patter of paws against pavement as your guide dog leads you to follow after him. 

He firmly resolves not to speak unless necessary until he’s taken you to the senator's office.

This resolve lasts for less than two minutes before he feels the slight brush of a wet nose against his hand and hears a small sniffing sound at his hip. Turning his head, he finds your guide dog, who has stopped walking and is sniffing at a pouch around his waist, and you looking sheepish as you stand behind him.

“Mandalore, leave it,” you scold, your voice lower than he’s heard it and with a suddenly authoritative edge that has his eyes widening slightly. You’re so little, he thinks, and all you’ve ever been whilst interacting with him is timid and quiet like a mouse. Seeing that side of you, as if flipped on by a switch, well...he can’t help but be taken by slight surprise. You pull back the harness, giving it a slight shake and the dog, with obvious reluctance, backs off, abandoning its curiosity.

“I’m sorry,” you say quickly, your cheeks heating with a blush. His hand twitches of its own accord, struck with an unexplained urge to reach out and touch, wondering if he would feel the warmth of your cheek beneath his gloved fingers.

Kriff, his internal monologue groans, disgusted. What the fuck is wrong with you today? He refocuses, looking down at you and shaking his head.

“Your dog’s name is Mandalore?” he asks, genuinely curious and unable to hide the amusement in his voice.

You laugh, nodding your head. “The one and only,” you grin. “Certain training schools do things differently. But the one we went to likes to name each litter by theme, and hers happened to be planets.”

You lower your voice, leaning in conspiratorially with a slight twinkle in your eye. 

“You know, for a Mandalore, she doesn’t look very intimidating, does she?” you ask, and he’s surprised, startled even, to hear the snort of laughter that is pulled from him as he nods his head, looking down at the guide dog who’s unaffected, her professional mask barely concealed behind a tail that wags at him and big, pleading eyes that seem to pierce through his soul.

“No, she really doesn’t,” he agrees, and your grin widens.

“I’ve always joked that if a burglar broke into my house, she wouldn’t bark or growl or try to bite at them,” you say, still smiling as you continue to walk. “She would simply flop down on the ground at their feet and roll over to demand a belly rub.”

“Well…” he says, and faintly, in the back of his head, he registers that he’s 

actually smiling. Huh, he thinks, taken slightly off-guard by the strange feeling. He can’t remember the last time that’s happened. It’s almost slightly disturbing. “If she’s not a fighter, she at least has some good distraction tactics.”

You laugh, your previous nerves surrounding getting lost and being late all but forgotten. It’s a nice sound, bright and lively, and Fox, the Maker help him, finds that he wants to hear it again.

“She probably smells the treats I keep in my pouch for Grizzer,” Fox explains, slightly rueful. He rolls his eyes and pretends to dislike it every time Hound brings the massiff to his office, citing that his panting is distracting, and that his drool gets everywhere, which is disgusting. Those things are both true. But Fox also can’t help but appreciate the warm weight of Grizzer’s head against his leg or the large, imploring eyes the massiff gives him when he knows that Fox has food. 

“I figured it would be unprofessional of me to offer one to her,” he continues, and you nod your head, glancing down.

“It would, but...” you begin slowly, calculating as you clock the staircase you’re approaching and turning your head to look up at him as a slow smile pulls at the corners of your lips. “If you give it to me, I could give it to her by proxy if you want.”

He nods, unzipping the small pouch, guiding you to hold out your hand as he places several small treats on the palm of it, which already has the dog vibrating with eagerness. But you don’t give in right away. 

“Forward,” you say, gesturing your head to the small set of stairs. The added incentive makes the dog quick on her feet, and you have to tell her to slow down as she rushes to comply, guiding you towards the stairs, barely able to contain the excited trot in her step. “Okay, Mandalore, show me where the railing is.”

The guide dog turns slightly, changing course to lead you towards the railing on the far right, placing her front paws up on the stairs and pausing, turning her head to look up at you for approval. 

“Yes,” you beam, stroking a hand along her head. “You learn so fast. Good girl.”

Fox watches, a smile on his face as you hold out your hand with the treats, giving it a few taps against the railing before opening your palm, offering it to her. She eagerly gobbles them up without hesitation, her tail never ceasing its happy little wiggles, which makes Fox want to laugh.

“You know,” he says, stepping up beside you and beginning to mount the stairs. “On second thought, maybe she is a fighter. I mean, she looked like she was ready to take off your fingers along with the treats.”

“When it comes to food, she definitely is,” you say with a grin, following after him. “If only all burglars came covered in peanut butter or dog treats, I’d feel much safer about our odds.”

You both snicker, and the rest of the journey up to the senators’ offices passes in a relatively comfortable silence apart from Fox giving you a few quiet directions as you make your way through the halls. You never fail to turn your head and smile at him each time he warns you of a crowd of people incoming so you can maybe take a step to the side, or if you need to turn left or right at this next intersection.

He isn’t sure how to describe it, but his heart does something strange each time you do. 

“I’m sorry for the inconvenience...” you trail off, uncertain of the trooper’s name as you stand outside the doorway to Senator Organa’s office.

“Fox,” he responds, and he’s quickly struck by the strangeness of how he felt compelled to give you his chosen name first instead of his rank. That, he thinks, is definitely odd and out of the ordinary, but he recovers himself quickly. “Commander Fox,” he adds, and your cheeks rapidly heat with a blush.

“Oh, Force,” you groan, covering your cheeks with your hands and closing your eyes, mortified. “I’m sorry, Commander. I didn’t mean to inconvenience so much of your time.”

“Don’t worry,” he says, and the brush of gloved fingers against your arm is barely there, brief and gone in an instant, but it’s enough to startle you out of your embarrassment, your eyes widening as you look up at him. “It wasn’t an inconvenience,” he says, sounding so sincere that you lose any ability to respond to that, falling into a silence in which the both of you simply stand, contemplating each other.

Fox, for his part, is struck by the realization that, for once, he means every word he’s just said. 

“Well,” you say, blinking as you try to shake yourself out of your stupor. “Regardless of the circumstances, it was lovely to meet you, Commander, and if we ever encounter each other again, you may want to introduce yourself by name if we speak. Every trooper shares the same voice, which makes it much harder for me to differentiate between you all, and I’d hate to mistake you for someone else and embarrass the both of us any further. At least, more than I probably already have.”

“Right,” he says, equally as slowly and strangely hesitant for this conversation to end but not knowing what else to add. “Understood.” 

“I should go,” you say, feeling suddenly shy as you give him a small smile and turn to the door. “See you around, Commander,” you murmur, giving him a playful wink.

You step into the office, not waiting for his response. It takes him a full 30 seconds of just standing there out in the hall listening to the sound of dog paws tapping against the floor, growing distant as you move out of his listening range, to realize that you left him—completely and deliberately if the smirk that was pulling at the corners of your lips was any indication—with a blind joke.

He chokes, uncertain of if he’s allowed to laugh—of if it would be completely inappropriate for him to laugh. His cheeks heat with belated awkward embarrassment. He shakes his head, making a note as he forces his feet to move and forces himself to walk away, heading back in the direction of his office.

The next time he sees you—and he can’t help the strange and foreign hope that twinges in his chest at even the thought of seeing you again—he’ll have to ask you.

Until then, he thinks, giving himself a firm shake as he maneuvers himself through the halls of the Senate building. He resolves to keep you—the girl with the pretty smile, the hair that looks like it was made to run fingers through, and the infectious laugh that he still hears clear as a bell even now that you’re gone—far from his thoughts, ordering himself to stop acting like some sort of lovesick puppy and for kriff sake to just get back to work.

*

Fox, to his consternation, is unsuccessful.

The whole day, as he goes about his tasks—filling out reports, sending requisitions to the Senate, doing patrol—he can’t stop thinking about you. 

Your smile as you tilted your head to look up at him, your warm, encouraging demeanor as you worked with your guide dog, the excitable pup looking up at you like you’re her whole galaxy, the way that he had been able to make you genuinely laugh...

Okay, maybe his bar for sharing friendly interactions with natborns was insanely low up to this point. But knowing that he had brought that out of you had felt strangely good, leaving a warm, unfamiliar feeling in his stomach that lingered every time he thought of it.

He’s so unsuccessful at keeping his mind off of you during the workday that it’s still early in the afternoon when he pulls up your file on the database, scrolls through your work schedule, and at the end of the day is standing outside of Senator Organa’s office waiting for your shift to end.

When he sees you come out, Mandalore, sensing his presence before you do, happily begins to waggle her tail, her footsteps quickening as she leads you out of the office. He calls out to you, and you turn, searching for the voice.

“It’s Fox,” he says, removing his helmet and tucking it beneath his arm. “From this morning.”

Is he imagining it, or do your eyes actually light up when you spot him? 

“I just wanted to make sure that your ride picks you up without complication,” he continues. “Not that I don’t think you can do that on your own,” he rushes to add, his cheeks heating slightly. He’s already gotten the sense that you don’t like being underestimated, and he respects that. “I can make sure that you have detailed instructions in the app so that your driver knows exactly which entrance to collect you.”

“That would actually be super helpful!” you exclaim, and there’s no masking the relief in your voice as you pull out your comm, fiddling with it for a second before passing it to him. “I’ve been meaning to ask someone to update them, because I have a vague idea of what each entrance looks like and how to describe them, but honestly, I don’t think it’s enough to be helpful.”

He takes the device from you, and working quickly, types up detailed directions on how to get to the staff entrance along with a description of its surroundings. He pastes a copy into your notes for good measure so that you’re able to keep reusing it at your convenience. He explains all this to you as he passes it back, letting you know your ride is booked.

“You’re an angel, Fox,” you say in a relieved breath, beaming up at him. “Moving here has been so stressful as it is, and getting used to the transit options is just one more thing on top of that.”

You miss the way his cheeks go pink, but you do catch his quiet, breathy chuckle as he awkwardly avoids your gaze. 

“Right, well,” he scratches at the back of his neck, looking down at the ground. “Your ride should be here soon. Want me to come with you and make sure it shows up?”

“I don’t want to hold you up if you have other things to do,” you say uncertainly, biting your lip.

The truth is, you so badly want to say yes. Waiting for a Speedershare on your own can be anxiety inducing. So many things can go wrong. Your driver might not be able to find you, and when they call and ask you for directions, you aren’t able to provide them with much help. They could drive past and cancel altogether once they realize you have a service dog. Or worse, they can turn it into a full out yelling confrontation. In all cases, you’ve learned, your anxiety is significantly lessened if someone else is with you, ready to back you up at a moment's notice.

It’s true, you’ve only met Fox today. But his presence is steady, safe, and you get the sense that he would stay without question and without hesitation. But you also don’t want to become his burden.

“You’re not,” he states, hooking his helmet to his belt. “And I’m not. Come on, let’s go find your ride.”

And that’s exactly what he does. 

He leads you out towards the pick-up point, and when the speeder gets there, he verifies the plates, opens the door, and helps you inside, waiting patiently for your guide dog to tuck in her tail before beginning to let it close. Before it does though, before it drives away and you’re left wondering if and when you’ll ever see him again, he speaks, his voice low and carrying the softest, lightest undertone of teasing.

“See you around, mesh’la.”

It takes you a moment, but as you drive off, the echo of the words you had jokingly thrown over your shoulder at him just this morning flashes through your memory, and before you know it, you’re tipping your head back against the headrest of the seat, quietly laughing to yourself, uncaring of the driver giving you a funny look from the corner of his eye as he picks up speed, driving away from the Senate building.

You’re still smiling as the speeder rounds the corner, and the building, as well as Marshall Commander Fox, disappears from view.

If you like and enjoy this story, please consider dropping a reblog, as you might help someone else find something they enjoy just as much. Thank you :-) and thank you to @strangergraphics-archive for such cute puppy dividers

[markantonys]

While I still don't think the show has done enough to show why the world despises and fears male channelers (since it really should've been embedded into the world building, so far we only know that the Aes Sedai hate and fear them) and it does kinda lessen the impact of the narrative that none of the EF5 had at least an initial gut reaction to Rand being able to channel. I do wonder how they're gonna handle that topic moving forward, cause it kinda has to be addressed now that Rand is actively channeling. I could see it being expanded more deeply as Rand's madness progresses/tie it into his arc.

the show has made it ABUNDANTLY clear that Male Channelers Are Considered Bad News By All. it IS embedded into the worldbuilding. was the king saying that logain's gone mad and trying to kill him not enough for you? was the people of tar valon jeering and throwing fruit at him not enough for you? was rand and mat saying "hey if i'm a male channeler please kill me" not enough for you? was rand's terror the second he realized selene saw him channel not enough for you? was selene's act of how a normal person would react to finding out her boyfriend can channel not enough for you? was his heartbroken yet unsurprised reaction to her rejection not enough for you? was the whole backstory of a male channeler causing the apocalypse not enough for you? do you think that show-onlys are completely incapable of putting all these pieces together along with aes sedai treatment of male channelers and coming to the conclusion that male channelers are probably not very popular with most people and it's going to be very tough for rand that he is one?

literally what else should they have done that would make sense within the very small world and very early story of the first 2 seasons/3 books that they didn't already do? shown emond's fielders sitting around the dinner table talking about how much they hate and fear male channelers when none of them has ever met one and thus it's not relevant to their lives? wasted time doing a whole sidequest for rand in s2 where his abilities are discovered by some Average Citizens and they react badly? shit all over show!mat's characterization and given him a negative reaction to rand in s2 that would not make sense for his current show headspace, just for the sake of furthering rand's randpain? i'm sick of the rand stans who act like rand is the only character who matters and mat's characterization should be sacrificed just so we can go "oh poor rand uwu even his own best friend is mean to him". portraying mat in 2x06 as the sort of person who bullies and kicks his best friend while he's down would've been beneficial because......? what is so wrong with the show making the ef5 feel like mutually loyal friends instead of "rand is the best and most loyal friend in the world but the rest are little shits who abandon him as soon as the going gets tough"? seeing as in the books, mat continues to be an extremely loyal friend to rand throughout the series but most readers are too stupid to see through his unreliable narration and realize he doesn't mean it when he says that rand channeling is like him eating babies, i'm not surprised the show decided to simplify things in order to convey the true heart of mat's character (loyal and caring friend to rand) in a more obvious manner.

and i guarantee you that no show-only is going "oh, it's only aes sedai who have a problem with male channelers, everyone else thinks they're cool". that's not happening. show-onlys are not stupid, and they understand that male channelers are considered bad news by all; or maybe they haven't thought much yet about how male channelers are viewed by the average public, but in future seasons once we see rand getting shit from the average public, they are not going to be surprised or confused or go "but i thought it was only aes sedai who had a problem with them and everyone else thinks they're cool?", they're going to go "oh, well we've seen how much aes sedai hate them, so it makes sense that everyone else does too". stop. think for 2 seconds about "have i actually seen a large number* of show-onlys misunderstanding X and/or do i think it's plausible that a large number of show-onlys would be likely to misunderstand X, or do show-onlys have enough context clues to figure out X for themselves or to be unsurprised when X is expanded on and made more explicit in future seasons and i'm working myself up into a state over a non-issue?"

*there are always going to be a handful of people incapable of critical thinking who willfully misunderstand what the show is showing us, just like there are readers like that with the books, hence unless a LARGE number of general-population show-onlys are misunderstanding X, as opposed to just 20 idiots on twitter, i do not consider it a failure by the show in portraying X.

[mikuni14]

Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo - Ep 7-8

There have certainly been many smart words written about the finale, I've managed to read only one post so far (and I totally agree with it), I've got a busy end of the week and don't really have time to read more. So I'll quickly list what I particularly liked about the finale:

as far as I can tell, the series probably wrapped up all the threads. Some things may be a bit incomprehensible, but I think that may have been the creators' intention, so that we could guess many things rather than be told specifically by the series. Like, for example, the reasons why JuYeong stayed and took care of DoHoe's father. There could be several such reasons and each one is good (and each one could be wrong lol). Such a wrap-up of threads, a satisfying finale and leaving viewers with a sense of closure is not that common in BL series, especially those that aspire to be more serious, we all know that 🤷‍♀️ so I really appreciate it!

the actors are excellent, I really liked, for example, how looking at DoHoe's body, figure, face, one could clearly deduce his current condition. This zombie-like rigidity, apathy versus ease, a broad smile, uncontrollable bursts of laughter... it was just 👌

I liked this juxtaposition of the oppressive, homophobic, obedience-enforcing and punishing version of religion, with the positive version of religion, i.e. "and the truth shall set you free" :) Because yes, truth, honesty, liberated DoHoe, made him feel free at last, made him feel at peace

I liked this "simple, ordinary" ending in general, where the answer turned out to be a simple, ordinary truth and honesty. Even if it involves pain, loss of something, consequences. And how even these consequences cannot overshadow the overwhelming sense of freedom and peace that is immediately visible in DoHoe. I like the lack of a sugary-sweet ending: DoHoe suffers the consequences of his lies, although as viewers we root for him and want him not to be punished at all

I absolutely love JuYeon's unconditional feelings, how he helps DoHoe over and over again, just like HyeonHo, who, even when rejected, after a difficult conversation, is still ready to help DoHoe

just like the unconditional standing by the child, even at their own expense

JuYeong, when he is serious and so matter-of-fact, when he sees reality for what it is, not believing DoHoe's "mean" but also empty words about breaking up. How many such situations have we seen, when one rejects the other for Noble Motives, or Out of Fear, or for some other Bullshit Reason, when due to an irritating lack of communication the other leaves hurt and then, frustrated, we watch them suffer for several episodes convinced of their unrequited love 😬 JuYeong is not like that, he knows DoHe, he believes in his love, he doesn't believe DoHoe's words because he knows him - this knowledge of the other person, their past, their personality is something I love in my romances, and what makes me believe in love watched on screen as a viewer. Personally, I can't stand this trope when someone is pretending or saying something ooc for them and the other person just buys it. I always ask then: do you even know who you love? Because it's so obvious ooc for them! 😤Super happy that JuYeong is like "I'm not going anywhere and I don't think you actually mean it"

I love how they talk about themselves, their relationship, their life together, their future together, like a real couple, real people 🥰

I love JuYeong because he educated himself in various, sometimes serious, sometimes funny topics 🤩 I often hear men people complaining that they can't handle various things because their parents / school / no one taught them, while Google and books in the library are free. JuYeong asks the internet how to live and how to be a perfect little boyfriend for his pookie and the internet answers him lmao, this is just so simple and perfect. JuYeong is the best!

teddy-bear pajamas! (I will put a gif of them later, love it so much!)

HyeonHo is so fiiiiiine

(apologies for the screenshot from the gray pages but I can't make them on Gaga)

To sum up: I won't hide the fact that whether it's my own fault, or the fault of the subtitles, or the plot, or the aura of depressiveness, but episodes 4-7 were incomprehensible and chaotic for me in some parts, overly complicated at times with conversations full of ambiguities and understatements to the point of being incomprehensible (but I also completely buy the fact that I'm just too stupid to catch all the nuances lol). Overall, the series is very good, although unlike Where Your Eyes Linger, I can only watch it once. The series showed the long-term effects of domestic violence very well, realistically but with respect for the victims, without sugarcoating, without idealizing the victims. It also showed struggling with traumas, which is not always successful, it also shows how important unconditional support is, but also coming face to face with the unpleasant consequences of untreated traumas. It shows the value of love, friendship, honesty, doing what is right, without irritating moralizing. The series had a very realistic vibe, I was able to imagine all of DoHoe's feelings, and the actor convincingly played him as a lost kid, tangled in his own guilt, traumas, lies, yearning for love and hope - even though he is an adult.

The only tiny reservation I have about the series is that I would like more of JuYeong, who has also suffered so much, but from the beginning he has been a strong,leading force in their relationship and is often "the adult one". However, his type of personality, his openness, courage, honesty and straightforwardness are responsible for the fact that he copes relatively better with difficult situations. So it's not really any complaint, more an observation ;)

But apart from that, this series is really good aaaand has a good, happy ending, yay!💖

[ivormybeloved]

Okay maybe i should do more rants about my MCSM AU ideas bc like. I have a LOT and then a month later I see someone mention an idea like it and I missed my chance 😭 so let's just clear up a few things

WARNING: some things may be triggering to some, so if you don't like mentions of kidnapping, death, religious themes, and a few other serious topics then these stories are not for you.

DELUSION [Main themes: Religious Trauma, corrupt society, coping mechanisms] — This will be the main AU I post for a while. It might be finished around late 2025/2026. The entire plot of that is this: Jesse is a pretty normal guy. He lives in a small town in the middle of nowhere, wishing for some adventure or something more. Each night he has weird dreams of familiar faces and his mother, Ivy. Ivy is not his biological mother and was forced to take care of jesse after his father, her twin brother, went missing. Jesse, accompanied by Reuben, one day finds a strange portal he's never seen before and falls into it. He finds himself in a strange and wacky world with no escape. Things will quickly turn into horror as he dives into the secrets of this world and even the people he feels close to. Every character in this story is an experiment that either has or is based on some sort of disorder/disability. Not all depictions may be accurate, but I'm planning on doing more research. The scientist and made all of these creatures is Ivor, The Creator. He's treated as a god and even sees himself as such. Our World's Delusions is not the official writing and is only hints at the future story + random ideas I have that I write out so that y'all can see them. The writing is on AO3 and my only fic I have written so far

THE GREATEST SHOW UNEARTHED [Main themes: Imagination, Greif, Kidnapping] — this au is, of course, based on the song. The current story at time of posting this is: Ivor takes his son, Jesse, to a carnival. They soon get wrapped up in the plans of the evil ringmaster (Romeo) who steals and manipulates children to join his circus. At day, it's a normal and fun circus. At night, it's a horrific, gorey freakshow filled with some unimaginable horrors. This is the first AU of mine where Ivor is (FOR ONCE) a good dad (not counting me and Br0ken's rewrite AU. That one takes 2nd place)

TOYMAKER [Main themes: Death, Paranoia, Greif, Loss, Drug use] — Toymaker was an AU that actually came from an idea i had for delusion that didn't fit in the story at all. In this story: Ivor, again, is Jesse's dad (all my AUs center around them. Get used to it <3 /sil) Ivor used to make toys before an accident happened and either Harper or Soren died (or both idk). Ivor couldn't handle the loss and ended up shutting down his whole business. Years later, Jesse finds a few toys stuffed in boxes in the attic. Crazy things happen and Jesse soon helps Ivor out of his depression.

FEARS/PHOBIA [Main theme: Suicide, getting over fears, Mental health] — This AU is mainly just major death. In this AU, each of the characters represent a phobia that Jesse has. Jesse starts killing all of them, trying to free himself from paranoia. Along the way, he gets tired of it. He tries to befriend some fears but soon kills them still. After becoming fearless and killing Romeo (the fear of death) he takes his own life.

FUGITIVE AU — this was a ship AU I had made because I was sad there was barely any Jailbirds (Reginald x Milo) content. The main idea: Milo would steal items and basically commit various crimes for Build Club. He'd get arrested sometimes, but was let go as no one had any evidence that it was actually him who committed the crime. When in jail, he'd talk to Reginald quite a bit and they seemed to get along. Isa, however, was tired of these constant crimes and the fugitive going unpunished, so she ordered Reginald to do whatever he could to capture them. Once Reginald successfully captured Milo, Isa sentanced the criminal to death by void. Reginald tries to protest, claiming that the punishment is much too harsh, but Isa doesn't listen and instead orders the guards to arrest Reginald with charge of treason. Reginald and Milo end up falling off of the island together mid-battle and fall to the island. Reginald wants to find a way back up and talk some sense into Isa, but Milo is completely ECSTATIC and only agrees to find a way back up when Milo remembers Build Club

ALIEN AU — random PolyOrder AU I thought of because of a narrative writing prompt at school 😭. The Old Order are pretty much just are aliens from a planet that is mainly just The End. They crash on Earth and the only person who doesn't like the new world is Soren. They decide to stay on the planet and study the world. They meet a human (Gabriel) and he helps them learn more about the world

I will update when I make another AU or change something. Other than that, have a good day!!

BIOME AU — one-off idea I had. Each of the characters are celestial beings (or gods/admins) that rule over specific biomes. There's sections of the world for them to have these biomes and their followers/cults. A collab AU with @thegreatnure!!

AXOLOTL AU — little AU where the Adventure Trio (after Jack is killed in season 2) are revived as axolotl's and are found by Ivor after the Older Order breaks up. It's a small AU idea I had to while talking to @/thegreatnure

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

I've seen my name being thrown around, and I'd like to dot my is and cross my ts on this once and for all.

Gonna preface by saying this:

No one said that glossysoap, groguspicklejar or soapskneebrace told their anons "GO HARRASS THIS RACIST" - that's just, once again, y'all misinterpreting our words. All that was said was "You are a big blog that accidentally created a witch hunt amidst your followers and even though you didn't mean to, you need to realize you still have influence over them, so you need to make amends";

I also made a very big point of pointing out that when soapskneebrace posted those screnshots, they acted as if their blog was an "island" and that it was safe to make a comment like that because they believed it would stay 'contained' within their friend group or followers. And that they should've known better because this is the internet, they're 28, and they should know stuff **doesn't** stay isolated. All things can be accessed.

Another thing I'd like to point out is that soapskneebrace/Madi has admittedly a history of their followers/anons harassing people in their inbox. I don't care that the circumstances are different. They *know* their followers have done such a thing and as a creator (yes, this is not a normal social media, yes, none of us are 'influencers' with proper check marks that make giant moves on the platform, but we all STILL have an influence) they should've known better.

(Their own words below 👇)

I'm sorry for the way I spoke:

Yes, the tone I used was aggressive, cheeky and on-the-offensive and the hashtag I used was in poor taste. I could've handled my **tone** better as well as the way I tried to make my point across. I realize that now once I've had time to cool off and I apologize for the way I spoke.

I recognize that I didn't help the issue by being as aggressive as I did and, in fact, just caused a bigger commotion. That wasn't fair, and the tone I used wasn't nice or helpful.

I'm not a trained psychologist or anything, and I reacted like any normal person should/would, in my opinion. Saw an injustice that was preventable and got upset about it. I promise to thrive to not let my emotions get the better of me, nor to let my tone ever be that aggressive again.

That's not to say that I don't stand for the things I said. I don't take back what I did. I consider myself an honest person... and if nothing else, it would be dishonest of me to go back on my word. I apologize for my tone but not the message.

About Bunny:

That being said, I'd like to point out that half of the blogs currently talking about this topic (specifically @ceilidho and @391780) giving their opinions and sharing it with their followers are doing so behind 'closed doors' (aka by blocking the two of us) and doing exactly the same thing soapskneebrace accidentally did: they are accidentally pinning their followers against us by providing a retelling of events and hoping their followers go read up more on their own, despite knowing they have a huge influence and that people on the internet are not gonna do that, and are just gonna take their word for it.

And frankly I don't think that's fair. I'm not even speaking for myself. I couldn't care less about the abuse coming my way or any boycotting to my future posts or current ones.

I just wish you both/all would stop putting me and bunny in the same category. You wanna get mad at someone? Get mad at me.

Bunny handled this with not just a lot more maturity than me, but also a lot more elegantly. Bunny strived to educate and to speak respectfully and in a way that was informative when she tackled all the creators involved.

If you go read her replies to the blogs in question, they were measured, understanding, respectful, kind and polite. She made sure they understood all she was seeking from them was some form of accountability, and never meant them any harm.

It's not fair that she's being 'lumped' together with me and getting any harrassment or torment over the fact *I* was aggressive, when she wasn't.

She has always, ALWAYS strived to make her blog a positive space, a safe space too. She has always strived to keep people informed and safe, and to tackle topics in her fics that she sees are lacking in the community.

Bunny has plenty of anons who reach out to her to discuss mental health, disability and other topics of the sort because she's trained for it, and now she's not free to open her inbox anymore because people are also spouting abuse at her.

I just want you all to stop going after her. She deserves your admiration, not your hatred.

Again, you need someone to yell at? To get mad at? I'm right here and I can fucking take it.

My inbox and the anon button are not gonna ever close, just so you all still have a place to go yell at me through while keeping your precious anonymity that emboldens you so.

Kind Regards,

Kea

[sirfrogsworth]

Wishlist Haul

All I asked for were pants, and those are coming Saturday. But you all came through in a big way with my wishlist and helped me solve some problems that have really been bugging me lately.

One of my biggest current issues is my decision to use my M1 MacBook Air as my main computer until I can move my PC upstairs at some distant time in the future. Which means I need to ask a lot more of it. And it is capable, as these Apple Silicon devices are amazing and very zippy, but I only got 256 GB of storage because I thought this would just be a secondary computer while I was taking care of my dad.

So I need storage. And if you do photography and use Lightroom, you know you need *fast* storage. In the days of spinny disc drives, going back and forth between images was maddeningly slow. I already hate the process of culling photos and picking the best ones. And sometimes you'd need to find 5 winners out of a few hundred. And when it took 3 seconds to switch between every photo, I wanted to die. And honestly, it could still be better.

But one of the best solutions is a super fast SSD. Which I had. I bought it right before my parents got especially ill and was planning to install it in my PC. But my priorities changed and I just never found the energy.

The problem is that was an internal NVME SSD. I needed it to be external.

Which is where this little thingie comes in.

This is an NVME enclosure, and if you are looking for cheap, fast external storage, this is so much better than those external SSDs they overcharge for. For $200 they give you a 2TB drive that can read about 2000 MB per second. Or you can get a 2TB NVME and this enclosure for the same price and get 3000 MB per second. Not only that, but it is upgradeable. In a year when 4TB is $100, you can plop that in. And the Mac's Thunderbolt 4 has a max speed of around 5000 MB/s, so there is room to improve there as well. Though sometimes advertised speeds are not reality speeds.

The only thing you need to be aware of is these drives run hot. You're going to think there is something wrong with them. Like, they top out at 90C. Which is nearly 200 degrees in freedom units.

I wanted a convenient way to mount my drive, but I didn't want 200 degrees on the back of my screen, so... MAGNETS!

And I can stack a few more if that section starts feeling too hot.

So, I have that problem solved. I can now use this as my main computer and work on my photography.

Next up... fashion!

I'm going out more and I want to look a little more presentable. I thought these two tone shirts looked a little more fashionable. And they are very comfortable too. I have a red one that I think I'm going to wear on my trip. I know you can't see the two tone well in the picture, so here is the product photo of the red one.

Next problem?

Well, it's maybe not a problem so much as something cool I wanted. A black light!

My mom had all of this uranium glass and I had no idea my salt shaker was marginally radioactive all these years. I really wanted to take a proper photo of some of the glass before it all gets sold at auction. So this should be a fun experiment.

I will say, if you don't have uranium glass, don't get a black light. You will want to burn your house down. It does not matter how clean you think you got something... you didn't clean it enough. And I have all of this dry flaky skin on my feet. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't bother me. You can't even really see it unless you look really close. But when I shined the light on my feet they looked like they had some undocumented disease. I will not be sharing a photo of that.

But the depression glass, that's super neat.

Some proper photos coming soon I hope. Maybe after my trip.

Next problem!

My key fob. This thing is a piece of shit.

Even if it looks cool under a black light, it is THE WORST.

It's cheap plastic, it takes a stupid watch battery, the symbols on the buttons all wore off. And all of that I could handle, but for some reason this fob has an effective range of about 2 feet. I literally have to be standing next to the door before it will work.

I had a black fob that worked much better, only the plastic casing was falling apart. But I taped it up as best I could and hoped it would not fall apart. Then I went to get my tires changed and they needed the fob to do some special reset of the pressure sensors and the battery died before they could. I went home to try and change the battery, and the entire thing basically disintegrated on me.

The inside looks like this.

The battery retention contact is held on by a tiny dab of solder. And if you pull the battery up even a little, it snaps off. And that's what happened. And to make matters worse, the rubber buttons were falling apart and the unlock button just... fell off.

So I was either stuck with the 2 foot range green one or I needed a new fob. Thankfully, they are only 20 bucks for 2 on Amazon. Unfortunately you need a dealer or an auto locksmith to program them. The lowest quote was $100 for about 5 minutes of work. The dealer actually wanted to sell me the fob as well, which they quoted as $150 for ONE. Same cheap plastic piece of shit and everything.

So, I got all of the parts from the broken fob and I hot glued that battery contact back into place and I transplanted that into a shiny new casing.

Works just like new. The buttons feel much better, I can actually see the symbols, and it has a range of at least 100 feet. And that hot glue isn't going anywhere. Changing the battery might be an issue, but these lasted several years.

Next problem!

An intervalometer is a fancy shutter button for a camera that allows very long exposures. It is detached from the camera so you don't shake anything and it needs a backlit screen because if you are using it, you are most likely in the dark.

My intervalometer is about 12 years old and uses another dreaded watch battery. And the backlight on the screen seems to be dead. So it is pretty much useless.

But look at this!

The light even works in the... well, light! And it takes normal batteries. Seriously, watch batteries need to stay in watches.

I don't know if I will get to take a long exposure in Florida, but I want to have this with me in case I do.

Next problem!

This one I actually solved on my own. But I found these stainless iron (yes, iron!) shims and I covered them with black tape and now all of my most used kitchen items never take up counter space.

Yes, I use magnets and hot glue to solve most of my problems.

Next problem!

My garage door is not very smart. And the remote control for it is huge and does not fit in my man purse.

So I downsized the remote.

But I wanted to fix the non-smart thing as well. A while back my brother got into my garage without me knowing. He must have taken a remote of his own. And I really don't feel like figuring out how to change the frequency, so I now have a sensor that lets me know when the door is open with a phone notification. Beyond that, I can open or close the door from my smartphone from anywhere. And I can give access to anyone with a smartphone in case of an emergency.

I will say, this company is really paranoid about people being crushed by garage doors. The instructions tell you to put up this sign in your garage...

And if you use the app to close the door, you get a light show with annoying beeping...

And I know that these accidents happen in real life. But whenever I think about how that could actually happen, all I can imagine is that scene in Austin Powers...

In any case, I am really glad I have this now. And I also like that if I forget to close the garage door, I can check the app and not have to get up to do it.

OH! I almost forgot. If I want, I can have Amazon place packages inside my garage.

Next problem!

What in the heck do I need galvanized steel plates for?

In product photography you need a diffusion panel called a scrim. If you try to buy one of these already made, they are hundreds of dollars. They are mostly made for movie productions, and those items always have inflated costs.

So most product photographers make their own out of tracing paper or a special plastic called Translum. It's $80 per roll, but lasts forever. I used to hang my scrims from the ceiling. But you can't really angle or move them, so you have to move the object you are photographing instead. Which is just a backwards way to work. So I invented my own scrims with two strips of very thin wood, metal chip clips, these little plastic feet that held up plexiglass barriers during COVID. And to weigh everything down... steel plates.

This is version 1.0 where I glued the plastic rather than affixing it with the chip clips.

The clips work much better and allow me to put different weights of plastic on, or even double plastic, for more or less diffusion. And I ended up not needing that board at the bottom which allows me to curve it as well.

And these scrims let me take this photo...

It's called graduated lighting and it makes things look neat.

I also got a backpack for my trip and shorts, but I am going to forego an explanation of those.

To all that helped, thank you so much. I hope you can see I am putting everything to good use.

[brainrawt]

Layla 6x08 - my reaction

I am so happy to see Layla in therapy, and appreciative that she got such consideration in an episode about Billy giving letters to the other kids. 

I love that we’re asking questions! I love questioning what we watch, dissecting it, I love exploring character dynamics and relationships, and we have so many in this show. I love talking about my favourite couple clearly, so I love them talking about it too. We missed some conversations surrounding their engagement given it was a surprise proposal and then there was a time-jump to them just getting on with it, I'm pleased to address it now. I mentioned this in my 5x20 posts that I wanted to hear from them about their engagement, and honestly a lot of the doubts I had back then have kind of been relinquished now.

“Why did you propose to me?” So earnest, so vulnerable. Layla is trying to make sense of everything and she’s building ground up. “Do you love me more than you loved her [...]” We know so much about how Layla struggles to put her trust in others and accept their love and she did watch Jordan be in love and fail at marriage once on top of all the other relationships they've seen and been in, she needs to KNOW why this will be different (I asked for exactly this!). Not just want it to be, think it will be, but KNOW it will be successful. The whole conversation, Jordan was so tense and scared of what she might say, he’s scared by her questions because the answers, “Because I love you, obviously” “Layla I fell in love with YOU”, "We take care of each other", are very obvious and clear to him, but not to her. Depression can cloud your perspective and thinking. Asking the questions is so active, not passive, not avoidant, just such an effort on her part and so much progress in my opinion.

We’re REALLY sitting right up in there with her in this therapy session, exploring her struggles thoroughly and step by step. We’re not getting a snippet or a reference to it, we’re getting all of it, what a privilege. She’s so vulnerable in this space. Layla goes around as this mini grown-up, running businesses and handling herself, but it’s not true. She really is just that little girl, this flashback brought back that depth to her. A scene of her discussing her mum in therapy? Come on. SOO head-on, SOO true, so so honest and deep and so fucking good. What we’re learning about Layla, it’s new and different but all makes sense and adds to her and reveals what she carries at all times. She lost her mum, but she inherited her depression, and that journey unfolded after her death so only had memories to reconcile it all with. “What if I don't want to remember?” She is stripping all defences. As for the memory itself…

TRUE CINEMA!!!!!!!!!!!! BEST SCENE EVER ???! SO GOOD SO DEEP and genuinely so profound. I was holding my breath throughout the scene, the way Greta portrayed the aching sadness was phenomenal. I saw Jordan and thought it was just a parallel to their present. When the camera pans to Layla, I’ll actually never forget it, I jumped. In this one scene, we’re seeing Layla past AND future. We’re seeing her true memory AND her own fears. She is present in the one scene in TWO pov’s, she is the baby girl AND she is the mother. A masterpiece. How much is she in control right now? Is she able to manipulate the memory at all? How much is Layla and how much is Monica? How she breaks when she says “Not for her…” makes me question. Before she even understood what depression means, Layla has felt like she couldn’t keep her mum alive, and has carried that all this time. The dad says “Layla needs you.” Yes childhood Layla needed her mum, current Layla needs future Layla to show she can get up, future Layla’s daughter needs her, current Layla still needs her mum! It’s grief and anxiety and so many other things. I am just in shock watching this, I never expected them to reach so deep inside of her, she's baring her whole soul to us! And obviously I’m giggling a bit at seeing Jordayla with a daughter hehe. Truly a standout scene to me, the best I can recall seasons and seasons.

She has clarity, she has selfdom and reflections and convictions; you look at me like that, you are not my dad. The convictions are real; you’ve seen all of me, we’ll be okay, I’m not my mum. She knows, I don’t want to be like my parents, I want to marry you, I need time. She has asked all the questions and done the digging and building and they have led her back, to here, to Jordan. Such clear communication in so many words, not only apologies and reassurances but laid out feelings and thoughts! I've been looking forward to this. 

The way Jordan says “I sprung the proposal on you” is unshakeable. He’d take back the happiest moment of his life to save her any pain. “The thought of marrying me made you (that) unhappy?”, “You don't want to marry me.” Him saying the hard words, it’s part of the out. He’s letting her off from having to say it. He’ll even break his heart himself to spare her that much! A minute ago he was joking about should he be worried that she has all those breakup phrases, and a minute later he is in all seriousness offering to break their engagement, for her. He'll give her any length of time, he’ll let her go entirely. 

The episode has left me feeling a little insane. Time to digest it a bit more slowly and I’ll probably be back with more to say haha. 

[scumashling]

Welcome newcomers! You can call me Ash (they/she).

About this account

•i made this account after realizing I've been into whump for years without knowing it and discovering that I'm not alone in finding comfort in fiction about characters being put through emotional and or physical hell. I've often struggled with intense shame related to my interest in whump, especially as it's tied to my own trauma, so learning about this community has felt like a huge weight off my chest.

•fan of: defiant whumpee, intimate whumper, Lady whump, living weapon, non con body modification, drugged Whumpee, revenge whump, dehumanization, fantasy whump,Bastard whumpee, religious whump, Whumpee turned Whumper, Bad Caretaker and nsfwhump,

•I'm fairly new to tumblr and am still trying to get a feel for how things work around here, both in terms of the people and the site itself, so I apologize in advance for any possible future faux pas. I'm also a novice writer and still building my confidence in it, but I do I intend to post some of my own fiction, art, and memes.

•I'm in too many fandoms to count but currently you can expect stuff related to Chainsaw Man, Berserk, Slay the Princess, The Boys, and Delicious in Dungeon

•DNIs: I don't intend for this to be an overtly political account, and i'm not into policing people's behavior so giving a list of opinions/positions I find morally objectionable and demanding you keep away from my account if you hold them isn't my style. If I think something you posted is wack then I will simply unfollow or block you, because I am an adult who knows and enforces their own boundaries. That being said, I am a leftist (socially, economically, foreign policy wise) and related themes are more then likely to show up in my fiction, so if you have a problem with that my account probably isn't for you. The one exception to the DNI is Zionists (including "progressive" two staters) in which case, fuck Israel, fuck genocide, fuck you for supporting it, you're a N@zi, Long Live a Free Palestine 🇵🇸

•WARNING: there will be non con stuff posted on this account, as well as general content related to abuse, kink, trauma and addiction, as well as the occasional gore post. I will use appropriate tags/cws but if that is not something you can handle, or just not something you're into hearing about, please take care of yourself and disengage. I use fiction to cope with my own history and truly do not want anyone else to be harmed by it

•I do not consider myself proship or antiship and as far as I'm concerned yall both have some weird people on your side. Basically as long as you aren't being creepy or harassing anyone, have common sense around media literacy/ engaging with fiction as fiction, but don't use the fact that it's fiction to avoid thinking about real world implications/themes, you are welcome on my page.

some facts about me:

•im a nonbinary femme lesbian who's currently studying fine arts.

•I'm mixed (Asian and white)

•I'm a 23 years old

•I was diagnosed with autism at age 18. Some of my special interests include manga, horror, feminist theory, animation, media analysis, mycology, vampires and cooking.

•i adore poetry, my favorites are Lady Lazarus by Sylvia Plath, Ozymandias by Percy Shelley, and She Had Some Horses by Joy Harjo (specifically the canto Drowning Horses)

•I have been drawing for 7 years

[zettatoad]

finished mario and luigi brothership. i liked it! misc thoughts

i kinda like that this game is relatively back-to-basics. feels like a good decision considering it was made under a different studio. besides that, dream team and paper jam were very much following the template of bowser's inside story, and i feel like that was a little to their detriment. compared to these, the first three games were all trying new things, and in resetting like this and figuring out how to make mario and luigi work again from scratch, brothership is both trying new things and paving the way for any future titles to try even newer things

it does kinda suck that they made it so that you select luigi's battle options with the A button. a little awkward to switch from A to B when attacking

regarding trying new things: i like how luigi is handled in the overworld in this one. i don't know if i prefer it to the classic way, but i feel like it was a different way of controlling him that introduced new puzzles and such, rather than a simplification. it admittedly took some getting used to to not try to make him jump while navigating

the music is pretty good, but it's not yoko shimomura good, y'know? i don't begrudge hideki sakamoto at all and i wish him the best but i do hope they're able to get her back for any further sequels

the pun game here is on point. kudos to the localization team for their many ways of interweaving electricity, sailing, and gardening together (some of those are freebies, though. e.g. i'm pretty sure electric current is named after water current)

i've seen people complain about how long the special attacks and enemy attacks are for multiple mario and luigi games, and that hasn't really bothered me before. but boy, do some attacks take a while in this game. not a big deal for me but i'm beginning to see where those complaints are coming from

i wish this game had repeatable boss refights like the previous few did. they could give it an in-setting justification with connectar, somehow. the fact that there's already a level scaling system means you could potentially have an option to strenghten old fights so the early ones don't die in one hit when you're strong

the bowser jr. subplot was a good payoff for me actually playing bowser jr.'s journey. i think the mario and luigi writers care more about bowser jr. than basically anyone else. i like how he's characterized as being an incredibly spoiled and selfish brat but still a good kid at heart (besides being, you know, evil)

i like that peach does things in this game instead of protecting or saving her being a major goal. awarding mario and luigi brothership two feminism points for this

i haven't talked about the actual plot uhhh it was pretty good. i liked it. some of the many characters who tag along with you were a tad one-note but it was kinda nice having a whole gang of guys you get to know. iunno.

they did nail the ending, in particular the stuff after the final boss. a great conclusion to everything

overall i rank it as my 4th favorite mario and luigi game, above dream team and behind partners in time (i have an unusually high opinion of partners in time, relative to how i've seen other people talk about it. if you did not like partners in time like this is basically like saying it's my third favorite (i don't know if it works like that))

we still need more mario and luigi games until we finally get one with a wario and waluigi boss battle

SPOILER THOUGHTS BELOW:

reclusa is sort of like if flowey the flower and monokuma had a horrible son together

i kinda think he sucks but i kinda think that's at least partially because he kinda shows up out of nowhere to take over the last act of the game. and then that last act is kinda just going back to old islands without doing anything interesting. kinda kinda kinda

like if he could peak out of his egg a little earlier and have some dialogue, some influence on the plot, maybe introduce a couple of reclusa-brand enemies earlier, then it would it be less like some random annoying guy took over the game from the previous villain and more like the annoying guy we all know and love rightfully ascending to his place as the true villain

also: why an egg. that's kind of random, considering how on point the rest of the game's theming is. a seed would make much more sense, especially considering he makes an evil tree

i bet you could have fun dialogue with him being his annoying self and zokket being like "yes, master. your will be done" or whatever and the extension corps could be like "is this REALLY the guy behind the guy we're serving?" could help make their face turn at the end of the game be a little less out of nowhere. oh well, writing is hard and making video games is hard and it's a lot easier for me to say all this in hindsight

i DO like his design and the design of the reclusa-brand enemies. i even feel like his dialogue and personality is kinda (again? argh) fun. but the way he suddenly shows up and takes over everything left a bad taste in my mouth

the final boss has a problem where they wanted it to be an epic multi-phase fight, but they also need it to fit in with the difficulty curve of the rest of the game, so it ends up that every phase goes down pretty quickly and has only two or three attacks, and it all feels less exciting than the fight against zokket, who had a bunch of attacks and survived several times longer than any phase of this fight

while i'm at it, why didn't zokket get a unique boss theme. antasma got one and he didn't do anything. he didn't even do anything

as it stands, i think the game would be improved if it ended at fortress zokket

i feel like i should write a conclusion here but i already concluded it before i started talking about spoilers. i complained here but i liked the game and i'm glad they're making more of these even if i'm still mad about alphadream. odds are high that the next paper mario game will be good instead of bad. that's all i got

[velvet-vox]

Random status update:

At first, I didn't think I had to write this post, because I don't consider myself to be important enough to other people to think that maybe letting others know what my current condition is may actually be important, because maybe some of the people who read my stuff may actually care about me a little bit, which is something I never even thought about until very recently, so here we are.

Mostly, I've been doing a bit of self reflection in this period, and have been dedicating myself to other things.

One thing that my period of self reflection brought me is the realisation that the way I'm handling my time spent on Tumblr isn't really working, at least not in the way I want it to.

More importantly, I've come to the conclusion that my own approach to analysis, despite improving exponentially in the last period of time, isn't providing me as many profits as I hoped it would give me.

You see, I realised that I have this extremely romanticised view of analysis, where analysis is this extremely cool, magical process; analysis as something that speaks to my soul and that triggers my brain chemicals; a lot of the essays that I've produced on this blog are things that were ultimately meant to serve the purpose of satisfying my weird fetish fantasies; hence why I consider The insane, untapped potential of Rebecca from Murder Drones to be my best work ever, it's the closest I've ever got to actually sound like a professional, and even then, it's not entirely an analysis, is more so a way to make other people appreciate Rebecca's potential as a character more.

Now I am currently reconfiguring my analytical process for my future projects, hoping that it makes a difference in the long run.

I've also been dealing with some pretty awful mental related issues, and these are very relevant because they all had an indirect effect on my writing, so I had to mention them.

They can't unfortunately be fixed easily, as I lack an appropriate support system in my life that can help me deal with them, so I just have to live with them until I can find a solution.

I'm actually going to stop making Murder Drones content for a while even if I'll still interact with the community from time to time, as with episode 8 around the corner it would be better if I took some time to reflect on what is gonna happen inside it.

My next project is hopefully going to be a Fethry Duck post, as I haven't really done any DuckTales analysis despite having it as one of my main blog's focuses, then it's going to be the turn of that infamous top 10 favourite female antagonists of all time, who grew up quite a lot in scale ever since I started writing it.

But of course, before any of these projects can become a reality, I'll first need to address a certain situationship with a certain old man who may or may not actually be a young adult and whose name may or may not be Jenkins.

That entire situation is my fault, and I'll have to finally close it for good as soon as the Murder Drones season finale releases.

[fatalframez-archive]

//As I said yesterday, I'd be making some decisions for my blog. No, I'm not leaving. However, there are going to be a few muses I'll be removing from my blog. I already removed Robin because I've already lost muse for her over not really getting to write her. Fiona, Ren Hojo, and Daniella will also be removed as I've had them on this blog for 2+ years and they've gotten no interaction. This isn't to make anyone feel bad - no one is required to interact with all my muses(that'd be a ridiculous expectation), but I just don't feel like keeping them around if people haven't been interested in that amount of time, you know? I'm also removing Sable because I'm personally just not feeling writing her right now, but may bring her back in the future. None of my OCs will be removed, however.

Another thing is I'm going to be more picky with shipping from now on, especially when it comes to who I ship my Steve and Eddie with. I often feel as though with those muses I'm being used as shipping fodder people add to their Steve or Eddie collection(Especially when it comes to writing St*dd*e) and so I don't start hating playing either of these two because I love them dearly, I'm being more careful with who I ship them with. No, I will not end any ships I have with them currently. Do not worry about that.

I will likely be dropping a few threads here and there before I start replying to what I owe. Mostly ones that are basically over already or ones that may be similar to threads I have with you already. I will only be dropping 1-2 threads with people I have 5+ threads with. Nothing against you friends! I'm just a little overwhelmed (and that's my own fault).

I will be adding a new rule where if you were the one who followed me first, when I follow you back, I expect you to contact me within 2 weeks of following me. Oddly enough, people respond when I follow them first + contact them first, but not the other way around; Often times when other people follow me first I will have always tried to contact them just to never get a response (talking it's been 5 months no response) and as that has become exhausting due to my social anxiety, I will not message people who followed me first first(and I will contact people I followed first first). If this rule is broken and you have not contacted me in two weeks since following me first you will be soft blocked. I'm not interested in being follow fodder. Also, I understand I was gone for 2 months and people likely haven't contacted me at least recently because of that so y'all who followed while I was gone are safe, don't worry.

That's all I could really think of in terms of changes or things I'll be doing. Sorry if I scared anyone. I've just been really overwhelmed with a lot of things irl and have been really depressed so I needed to do some things that would make things easier on me. I'm still not handling my mom passing or Reita passing well and my gf lost her job(she had to quit because customers were giving her death threats - we live in a bad part of town) so we are.. struggling bad. With bills, with food, with everything. I'm also having to deal with the fact that I just have to let everyone in my 'family' go. They've all done things since my mom has passed that I'll never forgive them for. So yeah, there's.. a lot going on.

Anyway, no one's in trouble and there's no drama. Just me trying to lighten the load of my stress a bit. Again, sorry if I worried anyone.

[microraptorreactor]

I love the tales for the blood thirsty series, and I've been dying to see more, any updates on the future or are you taking a break from ultrakill stuff?

Hello Anon!

For starters, you can always send me asks for the characters! I am more then happy to doodle them in silly situations.

Short version: for now Stories For The Blood Thirsty is on hiatus. While I'd like to come back to it at some point, the place I ended the series on is complete enough to be enjoyable.

Long version:

SFTBT built to be as cannon-compliant as possible, while still having fun with the setting. The biggest change I made to cannon text was keeping Earthmovers around, done because not including them felt wrong. It's meant to be worldbuilding for the skimmed over aspects of Ultrakill's lore. Which is exactly why it isn't updating.

I have plenty of ideas for how to continue the story. My main problem is I don't want my post-cannon plot to get canceled out by whatever direction the Ultrakill story goes. Currently, the post-canon plotline revolves around a mechanized Gabriel and Caladrius, but could go any number of directions. I want to know which direction is least explored when the game finishes.

I can basically only write pre- or tangential to cannon works at the moment. And since I don't want the concepts around the BA-31 squad and Caladrius to outstay their welcome, I'm waiting until I have a solid direction for the sequel.

The characters still occupy a special space in my brain. I love them to death. There's so many things I have left to say about them (especially Koda, Sleet/Baeri/BA-31, and Kaine), I'm just waiting to see what there is to work off of in cannon.

Sorry if this is a disappointing answer, lol. But again, I'm always happy to talk about the series! There's plenty about BA-31 (group & individual) that I never got to talk about in Handle With Care lol. Plus Koda And The Quiet is still in the works! Which is still a WIP despite being at the top of my WIP pile since whenever Electric Sleep was finished. Might go work on that now lol.

[beatcroc]

1- GOD I LOVE YOUR ART SO MUCH

2- just a random question: do you plan on playing the BYOC mod (made by mcpig and the pizza tower discord community) or other stuff, or is it out of your interests?

3- some leaks shown that beside a noise spin off, we may also get a pizza tower update with playble mr stick and also a PIZZA TOWER 2- INVASION OF THE ALIENS (or smth likr it i forgot the title)

are you excited for it?

yaaaaa thank youuuuu :3

2. i'm not really much for modding in general, haha. isn't that one something for DOOM? i have no experience with doom either but maybe someday [dont count on it]; i feel like if you get into doom it's just natural to get into the goofy mods along with it

3. i do not care abt any of that 🔥🔥💯🔥💪🔥 when and if we get any official announcements for more projects direct from the tour de pizza team i'll look into it, but until then there's still plenty to chew through right now.

in my case, i'm far more interested in the game's past than its future; my actual ultimate hope for more More Content:tm: in pizza circles is them expanding the base game with stuff that got cut during development, since there was so much of it. the mansion? the heat meter? unused transformations? betas of these things literally exist and are still functional and playable; and with the structure of pizza tower being as loose as it is i wouldn't think it'd be hard to add a new floor, or just an extra level or two to existing floors. even just looking through sprite archives and seeing unused peppino attack animations im like man these don't look like they fit the current combat system but i'd fucking love to see them in the context of like a wrestling level or something

but anyway i realize this is kind of a pipe dream so in the meantime i just comb through debug mode to explore what there used to be and crash my game every 20 seconds :^) [space pinball cannot hide from me forever i WILL find a way through.... i haven't actually booted debug since the noise update though i hope all the old maps and shit are still there :x

there's also the old demos and builds to sniff out but i've been lazier about getting to those because frankly they all feel like ass compared to how the final game handles fjgfjkgfgf

if there WERE to be be a sequel to pizza tower or something else in its universe, i would definitely want a different cast; or at least a different protagonist. peppino's tale feels very neatly wrapped up and i really like his ending as-is.

[evreeone]

text (i can't put read-mores anymore without preface text, is why there's something here always)

i feel like there's a switch in my brain that gets flipped every other day that just has flipping between "i'm okay, i can just bide my time the next (hopefully only) four years, i'm somewhere that at least state-wise is protective, i won't have it as bad as everyone else, it's going to be fine. i have my small community in the form of my friends if nothing else, and i have at least One friend irl who is pretty supportive and protective, even if the world around me is going to fall apart i won't be alone in it and it might fall apart less for me personally so maybe i shouldn't be so negative" or "i want to [----] myself, i'm sick and getting sicker, old and getting older and i can barely physically handle climate change right Now let alone how it'll worsen once environmental protection policies get cut, i'm in a city where racists are pretty bold and i'm already too afraid to leave my house, i'm going to have to watch people i love and care about and family in less safe states suffer even more, i'm going to watch the birds suffer, Why do i even Want to continue living this life because there's no Living to it as someone who is just a shut-in and now any small tentative hopes i had for a future in being more openly queer are Pretty Much Gone because i'm not strong enough to persist as myself in the current political environment"

every time i wake up. the smallest tinge of hope some mornings and then complete and utter hopelessness other mornings, and it's exhausting. i never really think about the future much because i always expect to die before i get there but it's been especially hard to grapple with the fact that the one time i started to (within the past year) it immediately went to shit.

i still really don't know what to do, for myself or for others, and i think the answer might really just be Nothing and that's. hard. as it stands though i am still clinging to rain world dlc release date as at least a Gotta Get This Far marker and just crossing my fingers something else is dangled in front of my brain like a horse and a carrot that'll help me continue to push myself forward