#i imagine barty bringing lily back to their place

[quillkiller]

the other day when saints dropped the alectobarty roomates au i was like…… so alecto and lily would be fun but i mustn’t… i will let the professionals handle it and today i go on tumblr and BOOM my wish became reality, thank you jen <3

KISSING YOU ON THE FOREHEAD 💗💗

honestly saints changed something in my brain when they posted that alectobarty roommate au… i have been thinking of little else since… mean cunty radfem alecto carrow i want you .. i think lives could be saved if there was a bartylily/alectolily love triangle where alecto WINS !!

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

Hey! I love your meta’s, a little while ago you talked about The Order of the Phoenix as an organization could you talk about the Death Eaters?

The post anon is referencing.

TL;DR the Order is incompetently hilarious and Dumbledore is a man who trusts no one.

Oh, the Death Eaters, what to say about the Death Eaters...

In a World Without Voldemort, They'd Probably Be Arsonists

One of the things JKR implies in the series, and something fandom seems to take for granted, is that Tom Riddle is the ultimate corrupting influence.

Were it not for him, the Wizarding World would be a much better place, and people like Bellatrix LeStrange would be productive members of society.

As soon as he is killed, even, by Harry, the good guys win, their problems all presumably solved, and Harry tells his son Albus Severus that it's totally fine if he's put into Slytherin.

I don't believe that though.

To me, it's not so much that Tom Riddle corrupted these people, but that he gave them an organized cause. The people themselves, oh, they were itching for a fight.

In a world without Tom I think they'd be a loosely, poorly organized, group (probably with Bellatrix as the ring leader) where they commit acts of domestic terrorism probably involving burning offensive shops to the ground or attacking muggleborns, halfbloods, and blood traitors.

Voldemort, to me, is designed to pander to them (and not the other way around).

The Death Eaters' Beginnings

So, first off, I think Tom's goals are not what he says they are. What he represents to his followers is exactly what they want to hear, wrapped in a grandiose theatric bow that they just love.

But how did this all start?

First, I don't believe in the Knights of Walpurgis. Instead I think Tom came relatively out of nowhere in the 70's uses parseltongue to prove his heritage as the Heir of Slytherin and thus of purer blood than any of them.

He throws these exciting rallies/parties that the rebellious, angsty, teenage heirs all go to. There he says everything they wanted to hear in the most eloquent manner they've ever heard, promises them the action that their fathers have never delivered, promises them a role in the glorious revolution and a place in history, and probably offers them mounds of cocaine.

All the Death Eaters we see, or the core of them, appear to be in this age range where they'd be in Hogwarts or just out of it when Voldemort came knocking. I can imagine they're all whipped up with excitement, YEAH LET'S BLOW UP THE MUDBLOODS and for some that's great, for others... things don't go the way they expected.

October 31, 1981: It All Falls Apart

Regulus famously steals Tom's horcrux. I imagine it wasn't so much that he learned the error of his ways but that he saw what Tom Riddle was really after: the destruction of his very society.

Lucius is riding high until October 31, 1981 and he sees the complete destruction of the entire Black family. Lucius' priorities greatly shift and as he grows older he prays Voldemort never returns. Unfortunately, Tom does, and he charges interest.

Bellatrix absolutely loses her mind, refuses to accept reality, and tries to torture the Longbottoms for information they do not possess. She is imprisoned in Azkaban and never truly recovers from this.

Snape ends up the cause of death for Lily Evans and must forever live with the guilt and be tied to her prophesied son. He also becomes Dumbledore's lackey forever, which ultimately gets him killed.

Point being, no one's having a good time. Some because they figure out being a Death Eater wasn't all it was cracked up to be, and others because they had the Voldemort rug pulled out from under their feet when Tom Riddle disappears.

Pettigrew flees and lives as the Weasley rat for nearly fifteen years.

They're left making a mad scramble as they try to pick up the pieces of their lives.

Canon Catches Up

More than ten years go by and then suddenly, in a muggle graveyard, the surviving Death Eaters discover that they are bound to Voldemort for the rest of their lives.

Death cannot stop this man and he has branded them: there's no escape.

Some are still enthusiastic supporters of the cause: Bellatrix is vindicated that her lord has returned, he rescues her from hell on earth, and everything's finally coming up Bella. Barty is similar in actively working for Voldemort's resurrection.

Lucius, meanwhile, lives in constant terror. Karkaroff desperately flees the country and hopes Tom will not find him. Snape, is in fact, Dumbledore's agent. Pettigrew only returned in utter desperation and has now cut off his own hand.

They're not the young men they were, some of them have families, to some of the past ten years have been utterly miserable. They have to watch as their children make the same damn mistakes they did, be sucked into this same hell hole, and there's nothing they can do about it.

There is a notable reluctance for the cause, and yet, they have to try with the same vigor or this madman will kill them all.

And it's all worthless anyway: come 1998, Voldemort dies again (perhaps for real this time, who knows, Harry Potter seems to think so for whatever reason) and then they are imprisoned for their acts as Death Eaters.

And they just laugh, because how badly Lucius wishes he could go back in time and tell his eighteen-year-old self, "YOU DUMB FUCK, LEAVE NOW!"

But Do They Learn Anything?

No.

Just because we see some of them regret being Death Eaters doesn't mean they regret their beliefs. Their beliefs were fine, even blowing up people here and there, a bit gauche but fine.

But maybe following Voldemort blindly was a bad idea.

Are They More Competent Than the Order?

No.

Tom Riddle is terrifyingly competent in that he infiltrates the government with ease, has spies everywhere, and all but proclaims himself minister one day and nobody blinks.

He gains the full support of most of the wizarding world's wealthiest and prestigious families.

But he doesn't actually give these people anything to do. Because there's nothing for them to do, with them, Tom's won. He owns the Wizengamot, the Ministry, everything.

There's no need to fight. It's over, there never was a war. Society is primed to accept Tom Riddle as their ruler.

However, the likes of Bellatrix LeStrange thinks there's a glorious war on, so "uh, go out and blow up a few muggles, have fun." And the young Death Eaters (and the older ones), think they've committed this great, daring, brave, and very important act.

Tom only seems to hand out real assignments when in desperate straits or else when being particularly vindictive.

Lucius, after messing up with the diary, is told to retrieve a prophecy he is not allowed to touch in a department of the ministry he should have no access to. If he fails: Tom kills his entire family. When Lucius does fail, Tom assigns his son to assassinate an already dying Dumbledore. These aren't real tasks, though they do have the appearance of one, and consequences for failure.

Barty, Tom is forced to rely on, as he is trapped in this dying infant's body. And better Barty, someone who is truly loyal and seems fairly clever, than Peter Pettigrew who is a miserable scum bag who'd sell his grandmother for a bar of soap.

Barty, of course, fucks this up. Rather than just kidnap Harry Potter at any of the many easy points this could be done (Hogsmeade trip, lure Harry out to Hogsmeade with super secret serial information about Voldemort/Snape being a Death Eater, etc.), Barty is determined to make use of the Triwizard Tournament to destroy his father's legacy.

This means rather than a few weeks, it takes months to kidnap Harry, and even then they bring along an extra boy who then gets killed and provides some evidence that Tom Riddle has in fact returned. (Somebody murdered Cedric). It takes months and Barty actively ensuring Harry makes it through the tournament and does well, leaving open the possibility that he might get caught helping Harry cheat at any moment. And of course, Barty has to pretend to be Madeye Moody for months, keeping his man locked and drugged in his trunk.

Thankfully, Moody's such a paranoid wreck, no one even notices.

Quirrell, Tom is forced to rely on. Quirrell fucks up, though admittedly not as badly as Barty. Quirrell fails to steal the stone when it's in transit/in Gringotts. He fails to murder Harry Potter, an eleven year old boy in the world's most dangerous school. He rouses Snape's suspicion almost immediately. Then of course he doesn't get the stone. He at least gets to the room with the stone and nearly overpowers Harry and gets it had he not been mysteriously lit on fire by the power of love/Lily Evans.

The only one Tom ever really relies on by choice is Snape. Snape is charged with spying on Dumbledore and later running Hogwarts (which he fucks up).

There is only one competent man in Britain: Severus Snape. Which is, of course, why he's a double agent that Dumbledore and Tom both extensively rely on despite his being a double agent.

There's no one else.

Tom Riddle doesn't make use of the Death Eaters but given they prove themselves enthusiastically incompetent at every turn I don't blame him. Just pretend to give them something to do and hope it makes them feel important.

That's all I've got in general, you want anything else you'll have to ask for something more specific.

[365days365movies]

March 16, 2021: Legend (1985) (Part One)

Hi, Tim Curry. How are you doing today?

Yeah, that tracks. Been a while, always good to see you. Man, actually, when is the last time I saw you? Clone Wars? I think so, although I don’t know if that really counts. I think, in person, it was...oof, Criminal Minds in 2012?

Yeah, dude, you were FUCKING TERRIFYING, HOLY SHIT. I feel like people don’t talk about that performance as much, but you were goddamn amazing, buddy. Sorry I didn’t open with this, but...you were my childhood, Ti. Like, from Clue to The Wild Thornberrys to Muppet Treasure Goddamn Island GOD I LOVE YOU IN THAT MOVIE TOO

Amazing. And let’s not forget Ferngully, of course. Look...I love you, OK? You’re beautiful. And I know that recently, you’ve been through a lot of health struggles, and I wish you the absolute best, I sincerely do. You’re the best, man. Hang in there. 

Actually, while I have you...settle a bet for me, I’ve got it with myself. Have I...have I already seen this movie? Because I feel like I might have, but I don’t think so. It’s like the Mandela effect, y’know? I mean, if I’d seen it before...would I not remember you in this get-up?

I mean...come ON, RIGHT? I know FOR A FACT that I’ve attempted to watch this movie with friends before, and that didn’t happen. Then, I tried to watch it on my own, and that didn’t pan out because I’m pretty sure I fell asleep after 15 minutes. It had been a long day, I’m sorry. But...I don’t get it, Tim Curry? What the hell happened?

Well...whatever. I guess we’re going to take care of this ONCE AND FOR ALL. Now, who directed this movie?

Oh shit, REALLY? RIDLEY SCOTT! Kick-ass, he did Alien, and this - 

And then this - 

OOH, and this!

Oh, and we can’t forget this!

And also this!

And...and this...

...And this...

Oh. Fuck, and this.

...

OH GOD STOP I FORGOT ABOUT 1492

...OK, this could either be a very good movie, or a very VERY bad one. I mean...it’s got Tim Curry in it, so it can’t be that bad? And hey, Scott was on a hotstreak at the time, right? What could go wrong? Let’s do this!

SPOILERS AHEADOH FUCK IS THAT TOM CRUISE

Recap (1/2)

...Ahem. Um. OK. Maybe I imagined that image, or it’s from a different movie. Cool. Let’s keep going, nothing to see here.

The opening text scroll tells us that once, long ago, before time was even a concept, the world was shrouded in darkness. But Darkness hid from the light, which brought to the world laughter, love, and...unicorns. Yeah, really. Unicorns harbor the Light in their souls, as the most mytsical of all creatures. They’re safe from Darkness, and can only be found by a pure-hearted mortal, like Jack, a denizen of the forest. He is loved by Lily, and both believe only in goodness. But not for long, as a struggle for the balance between Darkness and Light is about to commence, and in that struggle will be born...Legend (1985), dir. Ridley Scott.

As the opening credits roll and confirm that Tom Cruise is in fact in this movie, I take a brief moment to vomit lightly.

At night, walking through the forest, there is a creature with some...bad-ass makeup and costume design GODDAMN. Like, yeah, that category’s already looking good. Anyway, the creature goes through the forest, and finds a den of fire and torture, all lorded over by a horned man, who speaks Mother Night, asking for her protection.

This is Darkness (Tim Curry), and...fuck me, holy shit, I GET it. Like, this dude began an entire movement and aethestic, and it makes a fuckton of sense. THis dude must have given birth to, like 10,000 goth children, goddamn. Anyway, he commands his goblin henchman Blix (Alice Playten) to find a unicorn and kill it, and to bring its horn back to him. Blix, the rhyming cretin, asks how to find them. And Darkness answers with the perfect lure: innocence.

That innocence is symbolized by Princess Lily (Mia Sara), a maiden cavorting happily about the wood, without a care in the goddamn world. She visits her friend Nell (Tina Martin), and briefly has a vision of winter in the cottage. Nell notes that it’s time for her to grow up a bit, but Lily’s only concerned with finding her sweetheart, Jack.

And Jack is...well, Jack o’ the Green (Tom Cruise) is a young man who lives in the forest, with his animal friends. An innocent himself, he’s basically Peter Pan, with Lily playing his Wendy. Except, well, they’re not THAT innocent, because they, like, IMMEDIATELY make out on the forest floor. Which has to be uncomfortable, real goddamn talk.

Jack teaches Lily to speak with the birds, then takes her to see something wonderful and rare. All the while, they’re being followed by Blix, who believes that their innocence will attract the mystical unicorns. And, uh, yeah, Blix is entirely correct about that, because here they come! And they’re making whale noises?

Apparently, as long as unicorns roam the Earth, evil can never harm the pure of heart. They express only love and laughter, and dark thoughts are unknown to them. Which Lily takes as an opportunity to go hang out with them, despite Jack’s urgings.

But the unicorns seem receptive to her, to Jack’s...frustration? He just kinda leaves her behind for some reason. And Blix takes the opportunity to hit one of the unicorns with a poison dart, causing them to be startled and storm off. Lily flees into the forest, and is immediately scolded by Jack, saying that what she did is forbidden by magic forest law. OK. She’s as confused about that as I am, but she still apologizes to him.

The two kiss, and Lily makes a promise to him and the universe, I guess, and says that whomever finds her ring will have the right to marry her. She throws it, and Jack IMMEDIATELY JUMPS OFF A CLIFF AFTER IT GODDAMN MY MAN! Lily screams hysterically after him for...some reason?

However, this isn’t great timing, because Blix and the goblins have caught up to the poisoned unicorn, and they cut off its horn, immediately plunging the forest into a fierce winter, similar to what Lily saw in her vision. Jack, in the river looking for the ring, is trapped underwater, beneath ice. By the time he breaks out, Lily’s already run away, to Nell’s place. Nell is frozen solid for some reason, and the goblins are also coming off after Lily for...some reason.

Lily hides, as Blix and his two companions Pox (Peter O’Farrell) and Blunder (Kiran Shah) exposit the whole thing so that Lily’s caught up on her fault in all of this, and once they leave, she promises to make it right. No idea how she’s gonna do that, but sure.

Jack, meanwhile has collapsed in the woods and snow. He’s woken up by a spirit of the forest named Honeythorn Gump (David Bennent), who is...interesting. He asks Jack what in the FUCK happened, and Jack admits that Lily, a mortal, touched a unicorn, which is apparently the ultimate no-no. Gump’s pissed, but the ACTUAL SECOND that Jack says that it was for love, Gump’s just...totally cool with it? They have a drink with Brown Tom (Cork Hubbert), and agree to help him find Lily...like, immediately.

They quickly find the dead unicorn, and yeah, the unicorn is FUCKING DEAD after losing its horn, and its mate shows up to mourn. Jack and Gump mourn with the magical creature, which looks REALLY BIG for a horse, Jesus. She stays with her fallen mate, and Jack goes back to the group, delivering the news that they’re cursed? No idea where that came from. 

To lift the curse and get the horn back, they must find a champion bold in heart and spirit. Gump IMMEDIATELY nominates Jack, and takes him to some cave where he can find weapons and armor. He’s guided by Oona (Annabelle Lanyon), a fairy who is LITERALLY NAVI FROM ZELDA, I CANNOT STRESS THAT ENOUGH

Oona reveals her true form to him secretly, then notes that she could be anything he wants her to be, even his heart’s desire. COMIN’ ON A LITTLE STRONG THERE OONA. Anyway, in the vault of golden weapons and armor and...gold, Jack grabs a sword.

Meanwhile, Lily follows Blix and his group, where Blix uses the magic of the Unicorn Horn (or the Alicorn) to demonstrate his newly found prowess. But as he’s claiming to take over Darkness’ kingdom. Just then, Darkness shows up and claims the Horn for himself, and kills Blunder when he talks back. Darkness asks whether or not the Unicorns are both dead, and reveals that his power will not be complete until the female Unicorn is also dead.

Lily runs off and makes her way back to the Unicorn and Brown Tom, and warns them of the Goblin’s approach to kill the Mare. Brown Tom, who I think is either a leprechaun or a brownie, fends the Goblins off, while Lily and the Mare...DON’T RUN? FUCKING RUN YOU ASSHOLES!

Tom gets shot by an arrow...in the hat. He immediately falls dead, despite being totally fine, the dick. And Lily and the mare are captured, BECAUSE THEY DIDN’T FUCKING RUN WHEN THEY SHOULD’VE. Jack, Gump, and the leprechaun/gnome/brownie/halfling Screwball (Billy Barty) come to “rescue” him. He tells them that Lily’s alive, and Gump takes Jack to the Great Tree for the next step, accompanied by Screwball and Tom. There, they find...

WOW. THAT SHIT IS COOL. This is Meg Mucklebone *Robert Picardo), and this thing is absolutely my favorite thing in the movie so far...AND THEN JACK KILLS HER IMMEDIATELY. JAAAAAAACK, WHAT THE HELL, she was really cool. Goddamn it.

The group gets to the great tree, then falls into an underground prison, where Blunder is also held. The group is NOT where they want to be, right in Darkness’ lair. Nice job, Gump. In the prison, the guys, now joined by fellow brownie/dwarf/gnome thing Blunder, hide from one of Darkness’ men, as he takes Blunder away to the torture table.

Stuck in the cell, Jack suggests that Oona go and get the keys. However, her ability to transform into a humanoid form was a secret between her and Jack, and she’s upset by him revealing it. Gump’s also upset by the secret in and of itself, but she defends that her secrets are hers to keep. You tell him, Oona!

She then says that she’ll only do what Jack wants if he kisses her, GODDAMN IT OONA. NOW IS NOT THE TIE TO GO ALL TINKERBELL IN HOOK! He gives her a little peck, but she transforms into Lily to make him give her a real kiss, dear lord that is CREEPY, OONA! Jack almost kisses her, but refuses at the last second. He notes that human hearts can’t be won over that way, which greatly upsets Oona. Still, she ends up getting the keys for them regardless, and sets them free.

And at this point, we are halfway through, so FUCK IT. PART TWO! See you there.

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

I respect your opinion of Dumbledore and all reasons you mentioned. However I'm not sure I entirely agree with what you said regarding the Triwizard Tournament. I'd argue that Barty Crouch Jr. is the one who forced Harry to compete just to bring back his dark lord, and I believe the “magical contract” is the same as the Unbreakable Vow the second Harry's name was placed in the Goblet. Even if Harry refused to compete, which I don't think anyone ever has, he'd die.

I respect you too, my good anon! And when it comes to the Triwizard Tournament, there was indeed a lot going on. Even though GOF is in my opinion, one of the best of the books, there are a lot of questions concerning Voldemort's plan and the logistics of the tournament itself. Like why, for example, Crouch Jr needed to wait an entire year to get Harry to Voldemort when they were alone together more than once, much earlier in the year.

The film makes it so that Dumbledore's chess-playing is the reason Harry has to compete in the tournament. I normally don't take film additions as canon (and the GOF film was kind of a mess, at least in terms of adaptation) but the book doesn't give us a reason. You're right, this is Barty Crouch Jr's fault more than anyone, but I still think Dumbledore had a responsibility to get Harry out of this and he didn't even consider it, he didn't even try. Which leaves us to speculate on the reason ourselves.

I have seen that theory, that the magical contract works similar to an Unbreakable Vow. But I just don't know about that. Like, the book is so frustrating about this "contract" because it refuses to clarify. But I don't believe it could be an Unbreakable Vow. With the way that spell works, there doesn't seem to be any room for tricking a person into swearing one. Nor for impersonation. If you poly-juice another person and swear an Unbreakable Vow in their name, are they bound to that oath? I'm not even sure if the impostor would be, but the person they're pretending to be? No way are they bound to that promise. The spell wouldn't be placed upon them, they wouldn't have the trademark scars.

So that's the first reason I don't think it could work this way - Crouch Jr would have been bound to compete, not Harry. But the second reason is the political, the PR. If this was how the contract worked, Dumbledore would have needed to clearly announce that before anyone had the chance to put their names in the Goblet. The potential entrants have to know what they're agreeing to. Otherwise that contract is null and void if you ask me, because there was no informed consent. And even if the entrant is still somehow magically bound by the oath...and they find out about this later, after it's too late to back out? That is a scandal that Hogwarts and the British Ministry would not recover from.

I know they carefully instated an age limit and forbade minors from entering...but A, that would once again disqualify Harry from the terms of the supposed Unbreakable Vow, and B...parents would not care. The staff of the other schools would not care. If a student was forced to compete in this tournament because their life literally depended on it...I mean can you imagine that? That basically holds the foreign champions hostage at an unfamiliar school when they are all of seventeen years old. When there's every possibility that an underage student will get past the Age Line. What would Hogwarts tell the parents in that situation? I know this world is stupidly dangerous, but...really? This is why it's so convenient for Dumbledore and the story that Harry is an orphan. Lily would hit the roof. She'd have the whole tournament cancelled before she let Harry risk his life like that.

[lumosinlove]

On the third day of ficmas, Hazel gave to you…a New Year’s Eve party meet cute.

Sirius felt rather tired of the party in swing around him all of a sudden—even though it is his party. He straightened his button-down, the white collar falling open loosely at his collarbones, and took another sip of champagne. This one was made in Belgium. He’d given specific instructions to the waiting staff to bring out a different champagne per hour closer to midnight. He’d selected all of them himself, saving the best for last. It was ten forty-five now. He only had a few more moments with Belgium before it was off to Germany, and then, finally France. Because, of course. James and Lily made it a point to tell him at every one of his parties that he over did it, but what could he say? He’s on the list of twenty-five billionaires under twenty-five, and Sirius thought he’d earned a little extravagance. At least until he was thirty under thirty, and he had to—maybe—have a bit more poise.

Besides, he was always telling them, what else am I going to do with it all?

He looked briefly towards where they were laughing with Alice and Frank, then turned away towards the full-length window, watching fat flakes of snow fall down to coat the ground.

He gave to more charities than he could count, his brother would never have to work a day in his life if he didn’t want to. The rest was left to him. He’d spend it on his friends whether they liked it or not.

“Sirius! There you are!”

Sirius closed his eyes against the falling snow. Why had he let his assistant maneuver him into inviting any work relations at all? He pressed a smile onto his face and turned.

“Barty! So glad you could come.” He accepted the clammy handshake, “How are the kids?” Please don’t show me pictures.

Barty was already reaching for his wallet, “Oh, marvelous, wonderful, look here—“

And so Sirius spent the next ten minutes looking at pictures that ranged from baby to early childhood to first day of school, and the next ten discussing the best possible way to rope the Chudley Cannons into accepting a deal with this sponsor rather than that one. It was not the place at all, but Sirius figured he’d rather do it now than have to see Barty again later in the week.

“Padfoot.”

Sirius stops from where he had been arguing for looking into the Godric Griffins instead, and blinks at a boy who he doesn’t—no, almost doesn’t recognize. He certainly doesn’t recognize his nickname coming from his lips—no matter how full they may be.

“I—yes?”

The boy strides a few steps closer, turning to smile at Barty, “Hi, sorry mate, got to steal this one away. I’d also, though, go with the Griffins. They’re having a much better season.”

Barty opens and closes his mouth a few times, and then closes his wallet and accepts a glass of German champagne from a waiter walking by. He takes a sip, hums, and follows the tray for more.

Sirius places his own glass down, as it’s not Belgium’s hour anymore, and holds his handout with the same business-like smile, “Your Lily’s friend, aren’t you? So sorry, I think I’ve forgotten—“

“It’s alright, we haven’t actually met.” The boy grins and takes two Germany glasses from a passing tray, “You don’t have to pretend you know me, so put that smile away. I just thought you looked rather miserable.”

Sirius takes the glass slowly, watching the boy’s own easy grin, his soft but pilling sweater, “That smile?”

“You didn’t have this party to talk business.”

Sirius raises an eyebrow as he takes a sip, “No.”

The boy motions towards the window with his own glass, “But here you are sulking by the window until that guy comes up to chat about something that can definitely wait until Monday.”

Sirius lets out a huffy laugh, checking to make sure Barty is well out of hearing distance before taking a slightly larger sip, “I don’t want to see him on Monday.”

The boy hums in understanding and faces the window. He really should be getting that sweater dry-cleaned. Sirius watches his lips and his profile and suddenly has a strong urge to buy him a nicer one.

Sirius leans his shoulder against glass, cold seeping through his thin shirt, “What’s your name again? You never—“

“Oh.” The boy shakes his head, “Shit, sorry, it’s Remus.” He offers a smile, shaking his head like forgetful things like this happen all the time, “Hi.”

The corner of Sirius’ mouth lifts and he needs a second before he remembers to say, “Hi.”

“Do you like the champagne?” He adds. Could we go somewhere with a bottle of France to ourselves in a bit?

Remus nods, “Sure. Sort of like the cheese platter more, though. Not to burst your bubble or anything.”

Sirius laughs, shaking his head, “No, that’s fine. Did you see—“ He sighs, “Well, I arranged them to pair with the drinks but I’m fairly sure no one is going in order.” He glances over where he can just see someone—Peter, maybe—still nibbling on nine o’clock’s brie.

“You’re insane if you thought anyone would follow that rule, but,” When Sirius looks back at Remus as he pauses, he feels his ears heat because Remus is already looking at him, head dipped and lips soft, “but cute try.”

Sirius lets his temple rest against the window, “Yeah?”

They stay there, talking by the window until Sirius takes Remus’ German glass from his hands and replaces it with France.

“You have to like this one.” When Remus looks up at him, Sirius realizes how close they’ve gotten, how he can’t feel the chill of the window anymore.

“Is it your favorite?” Remus asks.

Sirius shrugs one shoulder, “It’s the most expensive.”

“But is it your favorite?”

Sirius blinks, “Oh. Well,” he lets out a small huffy laugh, “to be honest I don’t quite love this stuff.”

Remus tilts his head, “You’ve been serving it all night.”

“It’s New Year’s Eve.”

Remus studies him for a moment, then presses his lips together and holds his untouched glass out with finality, “I want your favorite. Not money’s favorite, your favorite.”

Sirius, to his credit, is not easily taken off his guard these days. He’d been ambushed too many times in stuffy meeting rooms with stale croissants on the table for that. He’s steady on his feet, trusts only himself, and is rather proud of the fact.

But here, he stutters. His heart feels warm in his chest. “I—mine?“

Remus holds his glass out more forcefully until Sirius takes it, “What do you like best?”

Sirius sets the glasses down on a side table behind him, “You really want to know?”

Remus nods, “Yeah.” Sirius might imagine it but he thinks that maybe Remus looked at his lips there for a moment, “I do.”

Sirius glances around the crowded apartment. Everyone is having a good time, paired off and merry. The televisions have been turned on. There’s a half an hour until midnight.

“Come on.”

Remus said nothing, just wove after Sirius through the apartment. Sirius nodded to James on his way by, shook hands and clapped a few shoulders, and checked a few times to make sure Remus hadn’t lost him.

He rounded the corner and stopped so suddenly that Remus bumped into his back, his nose knocking between his shoulder blades. Sirius suppressed a grin and pushed hard on one of the wooden panels of the wall. It clicked open and Remus sucked in a little breath.

“After you.”

Remus looked at him, “This is a secret door.”

Sirius nodded, “It is.”

“You have a secret door.”

“I have a lot of secret things.”

Remus let out a disbelieving laugh, looked once more over his shoulder, but allowed himself to be ushered through, Sirius following close behind.

“What the fu…” Sirius almost bumps into Remus this time, “Sirius, how big is this place?”

“A bit.” He lights up the small iPad on the wall and turns the lights on—still dim. He raises the shades too so they can just see the snow falling, “Well, no one really sees this part. I like…I like to have some of it to myself, you know? Somewhere that people can’t just…find during nights like this.” He offers Remus a small smile, “I host a lot of parties.”

“But I’m here.” Remus tilts his head again and Sirius clears his throat, making his way towards the small bar across the room that he keeps personally stocked. He lifts the counter gate up and slips behind it.

“Yeah. I don’t want to interrupt the kitchen right now, but you wanted a drink, so…” He places the three bottles he needs and a crystal mixer on the counter.

“I…Wait, Sirius, I don’t want you to feel like—I mean, I didn’t mean—“

“Remus. If I didn’t want you here, you wouldn’t be here.” He gives him a sure nod, “Really. Please, sit.”

Remus eyes the built-in leather bar stools for a moment before crossing to Sirius and sliding onto one. He fiddles with an ashtray, “Do you smoke?”

“No.” Sirius shrugs, “In case someone else does.”

Remus furrows his eyes at it for a minute, “But I thought…” His expression clears and he looks behind him, and the large bed set up by the window, the dark gray sheets and mountain of pillows. He quickly turns around, “Oh. Right, that’s…that’s thoughtful.”

Sirius really, really doesn’t want to talk about other people in his bed with this boy in front of him right now, “Don’t you want to know what you’re having?”

Remus looks up from where he’d still been looking at the ashtray and smiles, “Oh. Yeah.”

“Negroni.”

Remus scrunches his nose, “That sounds like a self defense move.”

Sirius lets out a loud laugh, “It’s not, but that’s funny. Do you want to grab me an orange from that bowl while I mix this?”

Remus follows his gaze to the fruit bowl behind the counter and nods. Instead of opening the gate he promptly ducks beneath it, “Here.”

Sirius has only just finished pouring when the sound of people counting down comes muffled from the other room. They both look towards the door.

“Huh.” Remus smiles softly and accepts the thin, wide-mouthed glass Sirius holds out to him, “Midnight already.”

“Yeah.” Sirius makes no move to pick up his own glass, and Remus just holds his.

The counters reach one and fireworks start almost immediately. The snow outside turns shades of red and green and purple, and it reflects off of Remus’ skin and hair, even from here.

Neither of them has said anything yet, but they’re looking at each other and listening to the celebration. Sirius suddenly really hopes Remus hasn’t seen this as some strange ploy to get him alone, especially with the talk about having people in here earlier, and his mind spins for a good ten seconds around how to ask for a kiss, or should he ask for a kiss, when Remus lets out a breath.

“I know we met two hours ago but—“ And Remus shakes his head for a moment, and his eyes definitely find Sirius’ mouth this time before his own lips do. His mouth is as hot as he makes Sirius’ chest feel and Sirius’ hand finds one side of Remus’ jaw. And then it’s over. Sirius’ fingers stay though.

“I—Happy, uh.”

“Yeah.” Sirius agrees.

“Yeah.” Remus doesn’t look quite focused. His cheek is sort of pressing into Sirius’ palm, and Sirius doesn’t really realize he’s leaned forward until Remus’ tongue is licking into his mouth, and somehow Remus is planted firmly on the counter, knocking their drinks askew.

“Fuck, I didn’t even try it.” Remus mumbles the words against Sirius’ mouth, fingers splayed and curling into his hair.

“Make you another.” Sirius just gasps out before they’re kissing again. It’s easier, now that Remus is Sirius’ height, but Sirius drags his mouth down to Remus’ neck anyhow, all the way to the worn collar of his sweater, “Later.”

Remus laughs, but it sort of comes out a moan, and Sirius looks up, “I don’t—I mean, is this okay? I honestly, I didn’t take you here for this, I don’t want you to think—”

Remus takes a breath—a few breaths—and smiles. Somehow that smile is Sirius’ favorite part of this entire scenario. His hands curl around Sirius’ ears, weaving the soft hair there through his fingers, and he leans down for a much softer kiss, “This is okay. But you do have…”

Sirius sighs, “A shit ton of guests.”

Remus nods solemnly, “A shit ton of guests.”

Sirius smiles against a sigh but nods, helping Remus down from the counter and around the spilled drinks on the floor.

Remus straightens Sirius’ collar for him before they sneak back into the party. It’s emptied out a little, maybe, but not much.

“Hey.” Sirius loops his fingers around Remus’ wrist to stop him from going too far into the main room, “Get brunch with me tomorrow. I know a place.”

Remus studies him for a moment before grinning, “No, I know a place. But, yes. I’ll pick you up at Twelve. Yeah?”

Sirius blinks, “I—Yeah.” He smiles back, “Good.”

“Happy New Year’s, Sirius.”

Sirius watches him move over to James and Lily, both of whom are looking a little flushed, and says softly, “You too.”