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ashenberry · 1 month ago

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ashen. ashen i hope you know. i really want to know metal gear lore and the story please if youre ever bored and wanna talk about it talk at me about it !!!!!!!!!

HEHEHE >:3c i was gonna ask if u wanted like a specific game or in an specific order (game vs timeline) but i decided im just gonna talk at nasuem. for fun.

future ashen voice this ended up being long as shit. a read more. for ur sake

ANYWAYSSSS metal gear is about snake. which snake? fuck you that one but specifically these two

The metal gear games can basically bit split into the Solid Snake Games [MGS1/2/4] and the Big Boss (Naked Snake) Games [MGS3/PW/V]

The timeline for the games go

MGS3 -> ***MGS:Peacewalker -> MGSV* -> MG1/MG2SS** -> MGS1 -> MGS2 -> MGS4 -> MGRR

*(which is 2 games in 1 but not actually? konami wanted a game released in 2014 so they took one of the missions from V and called it ground zero. and then the rest is called the phantom pain. tpp. the peepee)

** these are msx2 games which was a home computer back in the 80s it was basically slightly more powerful then a NES. its very funny its such a. interesting part of the timeline and they never remade them so theyre just 35 year old games that are like the biggest twist is that big boss. is a bitch !

*** Metal Gear Solid: Portable Ops is here but its not mainline saga. Metal Gear Rising Revengence is also not mainline saga but people have heard of it so it gets a mention. its the one with the brazillian guy sammy.

---

our timeline begins in the humble year 1964. the cold war is cold-ing and we meet our protagonist for the game john metal gear jumping out of a plane and into Russia to get some scientist past the iron curtain and into the states bc he decided he fucking hates developing nukes. Our cast for this game includes [Naked] Snake. The guy who will become, by the time of metal gear 2, the guy running the War Orphan Economy. they call him naked bc zero is mean and also bc they didnt give him shit in way of supplies

Zero. Also known as David Oh but who gives a shiiit. Hes your main point of contact for mission information he will tell you your current objective he'll tell you where to go what to do etc etc.

Para-Medic. She is here to tell you fun facts about the food you pick up, she is the one you call to save the game (in which she will then tell you about the movie ^-^) and she helps you when it comes to tending to wounds but i think that only comes up twice

The Boss. The most important character in the series given the impact she has on others, everyone whos met her talk about her in the highest regard and after this game Snake and Zero (and others) will tear the world apart for her.

Sigint. He's your main contact for weapons and equipment in this game. He and Para medic might end up being the character you talk the least to if you dont go out of your way to but honestly i really like their banter :]

EVA. Shes your intel on the inside for being the only other mother fucker on your side* thats actually here. in the russian jungle. Shes also propped as the love interest but snake and her at best have a one night stand and then. well you can argue they stayed friends. I do. i like that they dont get together it goes with the side thread that like. sometimes meaningful relationships cant be described as romantic or platonic WHATEVER!!!! next guy

Ocelot. fuck ass. bitch. he meows. he gets his ass kicked by snake and watches him hit his famous "i shit my pants" stance and then is just. [textually. stated in game] obsessed with him. for the next 50 years. and makes him everyone elses problem. my beloved mutuals could give u a more sincere read on ocelot i just. hes funny to me check this shit out

he does that for like 2 minutes. and for what. fuck him

Volgin. this guy is terrible he stinks which is great for a villian but hes fucking terrible. he also grabs snakes dick. he nuked a science facility hes trying to start mass produce the shagohod which is basically the precursor to metal gears. the metal gears are the nuke launching metal dinosaur

*theres some double tripple agent bullshit but. shes on your side like 90% theres like some side thing she crosses on you but snake i dont think gave a shit

---

SO SO SOSO SO. game starts out snake jumps out of plane into russia etc etc etc. This is called the Virtuous Mission. His Radio team consist of Zero, The Boss, and Para-medic. And this is the first time hes talked to the boss in like. 5 years? and she is like. the most important person to him shes like basically raised him since he was 15 he is often described as 'her most beloved disciple" anyways snakes like why did you leave >;| and the boss is like snake what is loyalty. who do you answer to? the goverment? the goverment changes who are you loyal to. for no reason. btw u dont need me anymore ive taught you everything now go forth and go save that russian scientist guy. so you go and pick up sokolov and then ocelot shows up and shoots the shit out of everyone and then snake shoots the shit outta ocelot and his boys but he doesnt kill ocelot becauses hes a fuck ass 20 something and snakes like ahh hes a fuck ass 20 something i cant kill him.

so he and the russian scientist walk towards the pickup point and the boss is like hi snake :> and snakes like shouldnt you be in a submarine ? and then the boss is like send the bees. Snake and Sokolov (Scientist guy) get swarmed with bees, sokolov gets yoinked by The Cobra Unit which is just. the boss squad for the game they have silly powers and theyre the boss's group from WW2 and the boss is like hey snake. im defecting to russia and volgins like hiiii we should kill the fuck outta this guy and snake hits his famous i shit my pants pose

and then the boss breaks his arm and throws him off the bridge* and then snake washes up on shore and calls in to zero and paramedic and is like hey chat. all my bones hurt so then the boss and volgin fly off in their helicopter and volgins like thank you The Boss for these davey crockets (which are nuclear warheads u can launch by hand) im gonna use them :> and ocelot (whos there) is like you cant just nuke the shit outta people????? and volgins like i can do whatever the fuck i want the blames gonna be put on the american who just defected and snakes like. hey zero i think something down the road got nuked to shit. the send snake a balloon and thats the end of the virtuous mission

*the boss has been wearing a bandana, and when snake gets thrown off he grabs at it and then from this point on untiiiilll. end of peacewalker he is seen wearing this bandana. idk if its the same one solid snake wears it might be im no bandana doctor

---

One week later, snakes in the hospital healing up from getting his bones broken and zero is like hey. theyre sending you back to russia. to kill the fuck outta the boss bc yknow that building that got nuked? well it was an american nuke on russian soil and if we cant prove that the boss was rouge this cold war is gonna go hot and theyre gonna kill the fuck out of us. So begins Operation Snake Eater, called that because the objective is to take out The Boss, Leader of the cobra unit (though the cobras will also die bc they are loyal to da boss L)

To begin snake has to meet up with his guy on the inside ADAM at the same shack sokolov was rescued from. On his way there he meets up with the boss on her horse and shes like snake. Go Home. horse stomps on his hand she breaks his gun. L. Snake heads to the shack. When snake arrives he is not greeted by ADAM however but by the motorcycle riding EVA who gets him supplies including a disguise for getting to the research facility sokolov is chilling at and a gun and shes like youuu should fucking sleep its like midnight and snakes like >:| fine. and he does. and when he wakes up in the morning theyre surrounded by the ocelot unit that snake has to take out and Ocelot, the main guy, has eva held at gunpoint and is like SNAKE. YOU. LOOK I GOT A REVOLVER LIKE YOU MENTIONED. YOURE GONNA HIT TTHE CLASSIC "i shit my pants pose" SO I CAN DEFEAT YOU FOR REAL and snakes like ok buddy & snake and eva 1-2 combo him, eva does a wheelie off his face, and they head towards the research sokolov is behind held at.

on the way there snake meets alligators and you can grab the alligator cap and some leeches and then you get to a ravine and oh fuck its ocelot again. that gif earlier? this is when he does it Snake and Ocelot have a good ol duel before they are RUDELY. interrupted by a shit ton of bees in which they are both. terrible at dealing with? snake tries to cut them with his knife and ocelot spins his guns at them and to avoid the bees snake jumps into the ravine at the end of which is our first cobra fight with

THE PAIN - each cobra brings an emotion into battle. The unit includes, The Pain, The Fear, The End, The Fury, The Joy, and The Sorrow. you fight each of them in this game. The way the Pain's fight works is that he has a shit ton of bees and you have the power of water. he uses his bees as a shield, fake clones, bullets and you can go. under water to not get stung. you defeat him he explodes yay

and off to the research facilityyyyyy. on the way you see The Boss and Volgin and Sokolov and Ocelot chit chatting and if u have a sniper rifle you can kill The End here but theyre just giving exposition about this girl tatyana and how sad it is that the pain died. off to the research facilittyyyyyyy

sokolov isnt there. some other guy is i think his name is granin? he has nice shoes and he was the guy who design shagohod and hes druunk and hes like shits fucked. heres a key card so u can go to grazny grod which is where theyre keeping sokolov and also shagohod and snakes like thanks. nice shoes. and heads out to encounter the secound cobra fight with...

THE FEAR - this guys a BITCH to do when youre doing a no kill run bc the way to take down foes non lethally is to take out their stamina and he will recharge back to full once hes hit half. his fight is him chilling. invisible in the trees until he gets hungry enough to come on the ground and start eating. i found when going non lethally just handing him a bunch of poison frogs works really well. you defeat him he explodes with a shit ton of arrows cause he used a crossbow and off you gooo.

Eva calls in and goes wdym he gave you that key card theres. mountain there. ill meet you there get you supplies. snake continues on towards their meeting location when he encounters....

THE END - honestly metal gear, aside from sniper wolf in mgs1, has reallly fun sniper fights in this youre basically hunting him down and augh its good. you can also put the game down for an irl 5 days and he will die of old age cause hes old as shit. he also has a parrot that u can eat after the fight but like. bro? dont? anyways you defeat him he explodes and then snake continues on in which he encounters. the ladder

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ANYWAYS you make it past the ladder and my least favorite sneaking section of the game and then you meet up with eva and shes got you some food and a way into grozny grad BUT !! she also is trying too yknow. seduce snake shes very upfront about this tbh shes like most of my missions is to fall in love w/ who the mission says anyways snake got any deets about da boss while shes just wearing her underwear and snakes like :| yknow eva. im not feeling the whole vibe your bringing to the conversation but i will talk about the boss cause this whole things got me conflicted why would she do that to me :| and evas like oh were u lovers and snakes like some things cant be explained w/ the lovers friends dichotomy but she was like. stupidly important to me and evas like damn. i need to get going ocelots getitng suspicious of me and she heads back to gronzy grad on her motorcycle and doesnt bring us we need to go. a different way through the sewers where we have our next cobra fight with...

THE FURY - this guy is decked out like an astronaut with a flame thrower and my favorite vocal performance AND THE FIGHT IS ANNOYING AS HELL I DONT LIKE ITTT HES A BITCH whateverr u defeat him he explodes and youre in gronzy grad

Once in grazny grad snakes next objective is to get into the weapons lab. find raikovich and impersonate him and meet of with sokolov. Raikovish isss. raiden mgs2 hes very clearly made to look like him raikovich vaugely sounds like if you took raiden and tried to make it sound more russian, they made him a little bitch to reflect the fact that gamers of 2002 did nootttt like raiden bc he was a little bitch with hips you could make out as oppose to solid square. I like raiden. anyways. you locate raikovich, knock him out drag him to a locker room and steal his close and now youre raikovich so now you can just walk around without anyone instantly smiting you.

you walk into the room where sokolov is being held and there you find him getting interrogated by tatyana (who is EVA. btw. idk how much of a twist this was suppose to be bc on one hand of course but on the other aaaa it was a ps2 game i just went like waow. the third blond blue eyed women in this game bc thats just what metal gear does theres a lot of blond bitches ANYWAYS) tatyana leaves you talk to sokolov hes like we gotta blow of shagohod and snakes like im getting you outta here. this time. for sure. surely nothing bad will happen and volgin walks in and was like raikovich. i was waiting for u in my room what the hell man and snake. cant say anything he doesnt sound raikovich at all so he just stands at attention and then volgin grabs his dick. Volgin's then like hah. an imposter. and then is about to beat the shit outta him and then the boss walks in and beats the shit outta snake and then volgin beats the shit outta him to unconsciousness.

snake wakes up with a bag over his head and his arms tied up above his head for beat-the-shit-outta-him 2: electric boogaloo. Ocelot, The Boss, and tatyana eventually are watching. its an interrogation scene theyre "trying" to get information out of him but we're shown earlier that volgin is very good at the beating the shit outta someone part and very bad at the getting information part. Granin (nice shoes) guy died. very sad. ANYWAYS. volgins like i hate this cia dog dipshit are you here for the philosophers legacy and snakes like ? cause he doesnt know shit about that and volgins like the philosophers legacy. yknow. the big pile of money that The Philosophers, a group that worked behind the scenes to pull the strings on events around the world that eventually broke into the US, Russian, and China branch after the cold war started? and snake looks at him like he just got the shit beat outta him.

Tatyana is like this is fucked up and The Boss is like your ass at this and Ocelot is like tatyana can u stop wearing that perfume (this haas been mentioned everytime their on screen together I just Forgot to mention it) and volgins like ok ignoring tatyana and ocelot. Da Boss. why dont youuuuu prove your loyalty and stab both of this dipshits eyes out and the boss is like 🧍‍♂️ yeah ok hand me that knife and then we get a scene of snake looking at the boss sad puppy style while theres a blade inches from his eyes and tatyana is like this is FUUCKKED and grabs attt. volgin or the boss i forget its been a hot minute. it goes to chaos a little bit but the scene ends with Ocelot shooting out Snakes (his right, looking at him the one on the left) eye and at long last. now people who havent played the games have their shorthand for which one is big boss and which one is solid snake (the eye patch. tho we still gotta wait a minute for him to get one theyre not just gonna. give him one yet they still gotta beat the shit outta him more). eventually volgins like thats IT. we're done for now send him to the cell and tatayana (EVA) whispers to snake when she has a moment hey i got an escape route for u w/ supplies all you need to do is to get outta the cell.

So now snake is in gay baby jail. theres a couple ways to get out one is that if you went in 1st person view mode earlier you would have saw a Ghost (whos shown up a couple times, uh mostly when the boss is like Are you there The Sorrow? the ghost is the Sorrow) and the ghost wouldve held up a sign that had a radio frequency if you call it it opens the door. you can leave when the guard uses the bathroom sounds like dinner didnt agree with him. you can also make friends with the guard by giving him food hes like waow :3 my names johnny my dads name was johnny my sons name is johnny and snakes like thats crazy can you open the door and hes like yeah and you scram presumably after putting him to sleep. ANYWAYS you run off to the sewers and eva is like bad news they got dogs you gotta get going and snakes running through this sewer getting chased by dogs n guys until he gets to the end and oh fuck a cliff drop into the river and he looks behind him and FUCK ITS OCELOT AGAIN goddamit hes like SNAKE. LETS DUEL AGAIN and snakes like fuck it T-poses and falls into the river jesus style where because he was barely hanging on takes him too the next boss fight with…

THE SORROW. yeah. the ghost from earlier. snake is in a realm between life and death. The fight takes place in a monochrome version of an earlier section where you are walking through waist through water. the sorrow is like its fucked up to kill people snake. heres everyone you killed and then you have to walk through this river past the ghost of everyone youve killed up until that point. no kill runs still have a couple ocelot unit members bc snake kills them in a cutscene. and once you wade past all of them you see a body floating in the water. The sorrows body. touching it kills you instantly and to progress you need to take a revival pill you have earlier bc u also have a death pill you can use whatveer but it wasnt important.

I will mention it here. This jungle is where the sorrow died years earlier. He and the Boss were put in a situation where one of them had to kill the other and they decided the sorrow will die and the boss will live. which is great for the sorrow honestly he already had ghost powers im. being a cryptid is his calling truly.

Snake wakes up under water and starts swimming upwards for air. he gets ashore and EVA's like heres the meet up spot and he heads over there where he gets his gear back and a nice roasted snake for the time being. They Chill before Eva is like OK!! i got some C3 youre gonna head back and blow the fuck outta the shagohod i need to get back before ocelot gets sus and snakes like o7 ok AND WE HEAD BACK. TO GRANZY GROD. to BLOW UP. THE SHAGOHOD. we set up a bunch of c3 which was c4 but a little lamer but they didnt know that at the time but before the explosives can go off volgins like HIIII and hes got tatyana (EVA) corned because they found out about the spy shit. Remember how ocelot kept getting annoyed by her perfume? he finally placed the smell it was the smell of gasoline from her motorcycle and evas like your a bitch ass motherfucker and volgins like lol. lmao. strikes you with lightning. and the boss is like hey. let me finish her off and volgins like ok :thumbs_up: and turns his attention to snake where the 1v1 in a pit. Ocelots miffed because HEEE wanted to 1v1 snake so he just watches from above. and throws items for snake which pisses off volgin oh yeah next boss fight

Volgin - he has electric powers he can zap the shit outta you so for the most part you cant really use ru guns bc theyre metal you gotta use C! Q! C! close quaters combat a fighting form in universe created by The Boss and Snake. you have. 10? maybe minutes to defeat volgin b4 everything blows up. at some point phase 2 beings where volgin is like OCELOT. KILL HIS ASS> and ocelots like fuck you. does his gay little hand gesture and leaves cause he aint getting blwon the fuck up.

you finish up the volgin fight and get the hell outta dodge where you see Eva outside on her bike and snake is like ? i thought da boss killed you and evas like noooo she wanted me to tell u that we gotta go meet her at the lake where im keeping a plane and snakes like awesome ok. and then the c3 goes off and theyre like yay and then the shagohod starts coming for them and theyre like D: and volgins like IM COMING FOR YOUR ASS and ocelot who hates being left out also gets on his own motorcycle and also starts chasing after eva and snake hijinks ensue ocelot gets knocked off his bike early you blow up a bridge trying to take out the shogod it works for most of it but theres still the front half you 2v1 it in some field you kill the fuck outta volgin god strikes him with lightning. snake and eva are like x_^ YAY ^_^

then all of volgins men keeps chasing them to kill em and theyre like ah fuck. eva's like snake ill drive u shoot the fuck outta them and so u go through this driving section and then you get out nice n good and then eva n snake notice the gas tank got shot and while theyre looking at that they drive into a tree and off a cliff and eva gets like. stabbed all the way through her abdomin with a stick and shes like aug i cant go on and snakes like you have to. i cant fly a plane. i need u and shes like well when u put it like that so u get eva off the stick and then perform surgery with snakes first aid kit which includes. ointment. bandages. a cigar? SHES PATCHED UP. she aint shmooving tho so we have some slower paced stealth before we get to the lake! yay! snakes like i need. to go talk to the boss and evas like ok. ill get the plane started so snake walks over to the flower field the boss is in and then we have our final boss fight with…

THE BOSS - also known as The Joy.

Life's end... Isn't it beautiful? It's almost tragic. When life ends, it gives off a final lingering aroma. Light is but a farewell gift from the darkness to those on their way to die. I've been waiting, Snake, for a long time. Waiting for your birth, your growth, and the finality of today.

Joy recounts to snake parts of her life. How she went to space and saw the world whole. with no division no borders no west vs east capitalism vs communism us vs russia. how she went to fucking dday and gave birth on the field (??!) and how her kid n womb were taken by the powers that be. uh in this case those powers are the Philosophers. She talks about how this. shouldnt be happening. They shouldnt be going face to face. How the winds chance and how someone you fought along one day will be ur enemy the next. iiii have opinionsss but those are stored in the boss ppt uh. ask if you want those send an ask im not going tooo incredibly deep here bc im just writing this all off the top of my head but she thanks snake for letting her talk about her self, calls in a bomber jet, and says snake. we have 10 minutes before everything gets blown to shit. lets have the best fight of our lives.

I have found that this fight is far easier when using a non lethal method and also this is like the only part of the game that lags the flower field has hands. The games theme snake eater plays for the second half of the fight and you can find 3 snakes around named Solid Liquid and Solidus. buuut im stalling. At the end of the fight The boss hands snake her half of the philosophers legacy that she stole from volgin. She tells him that he is a wonderful guy. That their can only be One Boss. and One Snake. the camera pans out and this is when you the player are suppose to pull the trigger. if you wait long enough the game will do it for you but this is where Joy dies.

the while flower field turns red and snake heads towards the plane with a petal he took with him that as they take of get stolen by the wind. as the gain win who shows up but MOTHERFUCKING OCELOT BABYYY HE WANTS THAT 1 ON 1 HE HAS SOME LIKE HOVER CRAFT BULLSHIT THATS SHOWN UP A COUPLE TIME AND HES LIKE FUCK YOU SNAKEE AND THEY HAVE A 1-1 IN THE BACK OF THE PLANE AND THEN OCELOTS LIKE WAIT wwai twaitwait. russian roulette my friend here here. 1 bullet. 2 guns. he starts juggling them u take them and theres like a lot of outcomes here but its either snake gets it and shoots past him and either no bullet or its a blank or ocelot shots him and its no bullet or blank and hes like. "im not an ocelot and ur not a snake what ur name" to which snake responds john metal gear. thanks john metal gear. ocelot jumps out of the plane and we're off. out of russia. thank god.

They arrive back to the states Snake and Eva have a night to themselves :smirk: and then snake wakes up alone with a message from eva thats like hey snake. i took the philosophers legacy. i wouldve killed you too but god. The Boss is really based wow. Her ORIGINAL Mission was just to get the philosophers legacy off of volgin but the dipshit nuked a building so to prevent the cold war from going hot she had to die but she couldnt kill herself cause the states needed to prove their innocence so they made YOU do it and while this tape is playing we see snake getting his medals and honors for operation snake eater and. the president whats his fuck Lindon B Johnson i think is like. youve surpassed even the boss. we give you the title big boss. people go shake snakes hand and he just fucking leaves and goes to an unmarked* grave and just cries bc da boss is dead. *its like a MIA gravestone i think. yknow. the gravestone "here lies a hero" but theres no name.

AND THATS METAL GEAR SOLID 3. Ill be fucking honest i didnt expect this to be as long as it is holy shit. and mgs3 isnt even my favorite game i just honestly sincerely just recounted the events to you off the top of my head bwhadwaiwfjiwf. ill do the other games but later hehe

#ashen.ask #ashen.rambles #<BC GODDAM

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twigstarpikachutroll22 · 1 year ago

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1, 3, 8, 17, 27, 30, 41, 44, 60, 67, 83, 85, 88, 90, 95, 99

1) 6 of the songs you listen to most?

Lately?

Jort Storm by Slimecicle

Lil Nugget by Chi-chi

Surface Pressure from Encanto

Big Bad Wolf by Scratch 21

Keep It Down by Oh Geeez

W(h)i(t)ch Way from Central Park

3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

Having trouble deciding what counts as one line.

I think it's either

"I mean to say I've been here before, all the way to Pandemonium and even further."

"I honestly and truly only want to know where I am--I'm not a hunter, and I don't want to get married for a long while yet."

8) Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls are a social construct, boys are also a social construct.

17) What was the last lie you told?

Don't remember for certain, but probably my mom asking if I was okay while I was being depressed and me saying "m-hm".

27) What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

Hate the sound of people watching things on their phones without headphones when I'm trying to watch or listen to my own things.

Love the sound of farts because funny.

30) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

If I stick them out forwards, first thing I touch with either of them is my computer.

To the sides, I can't reach anything with my right arm, but I can reach the sofa/bed by the window with my left arm.

Diagonally, first thing I touch with either arm is a book.

41) What was the last book you read?

Last book I reread was parts of The Girl Who Fell Beneath Fairyland And Led The Revels There.

Last book I read for the first time was some of this year's Girls Write Now anthology.

44) What was the last film you saw?

Minions 2: The Rise of Gru (I didn't get to finish it AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA)

(last one I saw all the way through was Encanto)

60) Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

A notebook. Some card envelopes and cards. A sparkly gel pen. My Trolls headphones. the erasers on some pencils. A flair pen. My blanket. My Trolls bag. Some books. A large plastic bead-thing that's shapes like a heart and full of butterflies and other designs. A post-it note.

TLDR; yes.

67) What were you doing last night at 12AM?

Listening to Speak Now (Taylor's Version)

83) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word "heart".

Cure Heart from Dokidoki Precure lkfhsdjkghslkjg

85) What’s the last song you listened to?

The end-credit theme of Kirakira Precure as I was watching some?

Apart from that I relisted to Electric Touch by Taylor Swift today.

88) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

Having trouble deciding between Muskrat, Bezos, Ron Desantis, and Soman Chainani.

90) One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

Freak out at first. Freeze all tensed up. Kinda stare a bit. If my mom hasn't already been woken up by the light being turned on, I go "Uhhh...Mama??" in hopes she might have some better idea what to do ifhsaiulghwraiugahrs

(If they continue just standing there not doing anything we probably both just kinda go back to sleep, though I might wanna keep the light on.)

95) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

HANG ON DOES MY MOM HAVE ONE TOO OR AM I JUST SUPPOSED TO FLY TO ANOTHER STATE OR COUNTRY COMPLETELY ON MY OWN RIGHT NOW WHAT--

Uh-- Errrm--

Oh wait! I could fly to where you are, couldn't I! We could meet irl! :-D

99) If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

PEEPEE POOPOO DIAPERS VOMIT DIARRHEA UNDERPANTS FARTS BURPS BUTTS ARMPIT BOOGERS EJACULATION--

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delugguk · 2 years ago

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[4] In the soop | JK

welcome to domestic, soft boyfriend, mini or not so mini jungkook in the soop episodes! ft bam

ㅡsince my mind can't stop spinning with every episode + jungkook's finery,,, I decided to do this! I'll be updating this once in a while so don't be afraid to come and check from time to time ♡.

ㅡI'm not sure how many scenarios I'll write since it really depends, this doesn't have a specific end because I can still write in the future but n-e-ways!! hope you enjoy it and please let me know what you think on my lovely ask~

WARNING: 18+ CONTENT.

pair: jungkook x reader

word count: 4.2k

warnings: smut, stand up doggy, peepee slaps pusay, it gets sticky and lowkey messy *wink wink*, creampie?😳 jungkooks so cute :( bam my beloved <3

[more episodes]

EPISODE 4. "fuck, listen to me. I wouldn't like him to wake up."

"ah.. I'm so hungry." jungkook sighed as he rubbed his naked stomach.

tattoos in full display at the very first hours of a saturday morning.

you were used to it.

finishing brushing your teeth, you meet jungkook who's now walking around the counter table cleaning up some trash from yesterday.

"Is bam sleeping now?" you murmur as you quickly approach him but not without affectionately wandering your hands around his back and waist first. It was a must.

"eung." he softly hums. turning his body around so he could have a better focus of your face as you're met with a very adorable puffy face, plump lips and a very messy hair. the way jungkook managed to still remain so pretty in the mornings was a total mystery to you but.. now that you're thinking about it, maybe he's just that gifted. sighs. he must really be, once again, the universe's favorite.

well, he doesn't have whole galaxies in his eyes for nothing, am I right?

"really, that easily?" astonished, soft horizontal wrinkles paint into your forehead as you place your chin upon his chest. "no crying this time?" you ask while pressing your fingers towards each side of his waist, thumbs caressing his skin.

..to shed some light into why you're asking these questions, jungkook doesn't like when bam wakes up earlier. if not, at the same time as him.

jungkook has been waking up extra early these days just to get everything ready for bam as soon as he wakes up. you know, being the good dad that he is. but the thing is.. that whenever he does, bam also does and it's a problem because each time bam follows him, it completely ruins his natural sleeping schedule. not only that but it also makes him develop hunger at such random hours of the night and that's... well, not very convenient for jungkook or.. you.

so like every good dad, he wants bam to rest and wake up at his designed hour. but... with the random times he gets to wake up at night, it's either because he wants to play or go to the bathroom. - jungkook and you were confused at first. asking why was the cause of this but after giving it some thought, you both realized It was because of him waking up at the same time you both did. his schedule was getting so messed up that he even started waking up alone at three or four of the morning. like how crazy is that?! - it was getting hard for the both of you because of course you also wanted to sleep well...

so because of this; you've been trying to help your boyfriend into getting bam his old sleeping schedule's back. but the process of that, mostly consisted on something like this;

jungkook putting all of his super gentle and caring energy into him, only for bam to take advantage of that, giving him those pretty light brown pleading eyes that make jungkook's heart crash every time, but because he knows he can't let his very handsome son to keep living like this collecting these bad habits, with all of his will, he needs to ignore bam's super adorable powers. - but then, that's when he starts crying and jungkook doesn't know another way other than to pretend to sleep just so he could do it too. It worked most of the time but as time passes, bam gets smarter and so he wasn't buying it as much anymore. turns out, bam just loves his dad so much he wants to be with him 24/7 so yeah.. it was also getting hard for jungkook to come up with new ideas but honestly... can you blame him?

so that's why everytime jungkook's plan or yours worked, you both always tried to stay as quiet as possible and it usually worked so it wasn't something very hard to keep butㅡthere were still some days like today where things could get a little.. let's say, complicated.

"mhm.. well," he lowly chuckles. "not that easy. I had to promise him to give him lots of snacks as soon as he wakes up this time." with a silly smile on his face.

poking fun at what he said, you take your chin off his firm naked chest. "of course you said that." followed by a playful slap to his shoulders, turning away from him. or well, trying to because jungkook doesn't let you escape that easily as he tugs your body back into his.

"hm.. where are you going?" he says in undertones, face closer to yours.

"...out?" nonplussed, you proceed to ask him, "aren't we.. making breakfast?"

"eung, you could say so." he says blandly enough, nodding his head very brightly in a unbothered manner. "but first..." just to suddenly change his whole demeanour as he takes you by the waist, pulling your body closer to his. "let me do some things." with one hand traveling down your ass. very softly, very.. delicately.

oh god.

"ohh, hell no!" you scream-whisper, trying to get out of his trap as soon as you remember bam's sleeping.

but jungkook only smiles. wrapping his super strong arms around your waist. "why not?" mumbling with his head buried onto your neck and you can swear you feel him lick his lips.

"what do you mean why not?" you blink, muttering back at him with an expressionless face. "don't you see how hard it is to put bam back to sleep? like do you really want to get through all of that again and lose aaall of your hard work?" with your palms trying to push him away but you just keep on failing. miserably.

jungkook pauses for a few seconds, only to say. "..you know what else is hard?"

but you roll your eyes. "jungkook!" slapping his muscular chest. "weren't you super hungry?"

"super horny too.." he says.. quickly. way too quickly.

you fake cry. "you're insufferable."

jungkook chuckles at that. "come on babe.." with a low tone on his voice, murmuring against your neck once again. just this time leaving slow kisses as he speaks. "I'll make it fast. I can make it fast.. we can make it-"

and you closed your eyes. he was turning you on. not only by his kisses but his hands that were now palming your ass.. "jungkook.. I really don-"

"I know baby but we can keep quiet.." he purrs as he takes one of your legs up and when he has both of them, you're already straddling his waist and It inmediately makes you feel his growing bulge. you can't help but release a gasp that he catches to hear.

slowly grinning to himself, jungkook takes you back to the counter table placing you on top of it. opening your legs as he adjusts his body in betweenㅡmaking no room for you to close them.

his hands start roaming around your soft skin, going up and down your legs as he sensually starts kissing your neck, you're trying not to let any moans out but it's kinda hard when he's touching and teasing you like this.

"can you keep quiet for me, baby?" he purrs against your ear. "or you don't think you could take it.." kisses travelling alongside your lips now. "..is that It?"

with a whisper that lingered pass your lips, you could feel the way his increased breathing drubbed on your skin. he looks irresistible and so because of that, you can't help but take the nape of his neck, leading him in onto your lips. wanting to kiss him so bad, feel him so bad..

you've once again fell into your boyfriend's dangerous trap. fuck.

but he stops, just before you start doing anything.

"If you want to kiss me, I need you to say it." he pauses. "you know how once I get to kiss your pretty lips, this won't stop here."

he lowly says with lidded eyes and you know he's right. knowing him for many years, you know how much jungkook enjoys to just.. kiss. It is something he really loves as it is very intimate for him. It turns him on like no other because he has such a strong connection with you so when he feels it.. he really feels it. very strongly.

so with him not being able to control himself whenever this happened.. you immediately knew the right answer because, damn. you were also as much as a mess, if not the same, for this.

you look deeply into his eyes, taking your lips closer to his. "I want this." then pausing, smiling a little. "very badly." placing a quick peck into his lips.

and as soon as you say that, jungkook's mouth searches for your lips and so you both start kissing very deeply. tongues clashing against each others as they move in sync, jungkook's lips travels below your jaw painting butterfly kisses all over it as his kisses and hands get needier and you can't help but open your legs wide to give him more access and closeness into your body. his hands stroking your bare legs very softly yet so needy.. it's something you loved about him.

always touching you very gently yet deadly.. you swear those little moments always made you get wet so fast.. and you're pretty sure he knows it too by the way his hands slided up your legs the same time he gingerly bits onto your skin and shoulders. a smile always formed along jungkook's face everytime a little moan escaped from your lips and for the way you seemed to clutch your hands over his big body. it makes him know just how much you also want him.

softly touching the hem of your shirt, he takes a step back pulling it off from you as you put your hands up. skin totally bare, you're only left with a cute little white panty that it actually marked how wet you were, given to its (now) transparent fabric that helped expose yourself the more you opened your legs for him to see.

"fuck.." he exhales. "no bra and a soaked panty?" he mischievously stared at you. "you must like me a lot.." he teases.

"no shit, why do you think I've been with you this long?" you found the way to fight back. but that just makes jungkook's smirk grow even more.

"Is that so?" he bites his lips as he slowly moisturizes them with his tongue.

pulling your legs by your ass so you could feel how hard his evident growing dick felt like, he wanted to tease you. cause some sort of friction because oh yeah, he was enjoying this a lot. "you make me crazy, but it seems like you want me to really lose it." he groans between your lips.

but it doesn't last long as soon as he's already leaving traces of kisses to your collabones down to your chest. - finding your cute boobs, his lips meet your very erect nipples. warm lips closing around it; licking, pulling and flicking.. his tongue went crazy with it as one of his fingers played with your clothed, still very wet clit.

you couldn't help but want more from him so what you do isㅡstart swinging your hips back and forth every time his fingers moved.

you were getting desperate and so was he.

watching you move like that made jungkook wrap his teeth against his lower lip. wanting to kiss your pretty lips once again and so that's what he does.

feeling up his body while kissing, jungkook hands weren't any different from yoursㅡthe moment getting so intense, both of your breathings deteriorated by each passed second.

so just before you could say anything to your very horny boyfriend, he said. "turn around for me." with a very deep, raspy moan that resonated through your whole body the very moment his words reached your ears.

his soft steamy kisses, burning your skin as he says so, you feel like you could explode. feeling so wanted by him. - you inmediately knew what he wanted the moment he opened his pretty mouth and to be honest? you can't fucking wait.

"are you sure?" but first, you breathe while looking down on his swollen red lipsㅡyou still want to make sure because you know how messy or loud this could get.

but jungkook doesn't respond. decided into just taking action of his desires, he kisses you one more time before making his own way to manhandle you back into putting both your legs down to turn you around. ass exposed to him, god damn it he adored this view.

"if I say I want you to turn around, that's exactly what you do, princess." he deeply purrs into your ear. sliding a hand below the fabric, gripping your bare ass with a tiny, little slap on it with his hand still lingering beneath it so he wouldn't cause too much noise.

"your heard me, baby?" he pecks your neck and you naturally arch your back into him. slightly opening your legs.

god, you just wanted your panties off right now. the urge and ache on your clit getting unbearable. you just wanted him to touch you.

noticing your little movement, jungkook chuckles to himself. but no after you start rubbing your ass against his joggers. feeling his clothed dick that way, you were actually trying to take your panties off that way.

"if you want to take this.." jungkook starts speaking while pulling the soaked fabric aside. rapidly touching your folds with his bare middle finger to then close it back again. "..off," gifting you a little slap on it that makes you actually jumpㅡhe proceeds to hug your body with his dick pressed against your ass as his head lays to your side. "just say the words, baby." purring back again into your ear with a sensual tone this time.

"fuck me-" you moan, with a plead.

"uh-uh, angel.. does aren't the words I want."

trying to move your hips back at him so you could tease his dick and hopefully calm your very pulsating cunt, jungkook is in so deep close to you that is almost impossible to move. mostly because all you have in front of you right now is this stupid table.

little did you know jungkook could actually feel the way your cunt pulsated for him everytime...

defeated, you decide to answer. "take my panties off."

"hm.." jungkook hums. "see how it wasn't so hard?" smirking afterwards.

too bad you can't see.

"shut up" it's all you say and he chuckles.

the moment he removes your white panties, his mouth is left with a gasp as he narrowed his eyes with his eyebrows furrowed and the word 'O' forming on his lips. the sight making him want to destroy you here and there as he mentally cursed himself for not going to another place to fuck you properly but he was so horny and you were so wet that the moment he pulled it off, the thread of arousal was so visible it was hard to tell where did so much liquid came from. having a fight on which thin strand could get unattached first from the cotton fabric.

"fuck, all of this for me?" he croaked, Immediately taking off his black joggers aswell. he did not had anything under it so yeah, dick was jumping the moment he took it off.

teasing your entrance felt like heaven to him. your walls feeling so soft against his length, dick getting soaked so easily.. he swears he could die by how heavily turned on you make him feel. "my fucking demon is always so ready for me." he rasps, giving a few consecutive slaps to your clit with the tip of his bare dick. "guess you'll always want me as much as I always want you huh?" keeping sliding his hard dick between your folds, slowly. teasing to enter but it never does. he was insane.

"don't get too loud, okay?" he stated with a kiss to your neck.

grabbing your waist with one hand he squeezes you very gently to let you know he will penetrate your slit now.

the moment he does, you try hard not to moan letting out a loud sigh instead. legs already shaking, you were waiting for this so bad and like as if it wasn't possible, you also started to get more wet with strands of arousal dropping down your thighs and jungkook wasn't even fully in yet.

yeah, it's been 7 days of you without having sex. It was about time.

"agh- shit. relax baby, you're squeezing me so hard."

"eugn- s-sorry babe, I- I just-" you lean on the counter. chest plastered on it.

"I know angel. open your legs a little more for me hm? I promise I'll give it to you good." he murmurs while taking your ass back into him making you yelp.

"sshh baby, bam.." he warns you.

"I know-" you mutter back to him.

jungkook starts fucking you with slow strokes. noisy, wet strokes and you can't move for the way his hands are grasping into your hips. - pressing both your legs together now, jungkook thrusts into you as you feel him so full and deep inside of you. your back couldn't stop arching to him, your moans were slowly increasing the moment jungkook started heightening his speed. It wasn't much of him going fast, but more like going hard. the way your pussy sounded everytime he slammed his hips towards you turned you on even more, he feels so good, so hard, so big.. fuck. he was truly perfect.

"fuck- baby, can't you keep quiet?" he groans while taking your torso up to him, covering your neck with one of his hands, arching your back, placing your head onto his shoulders, perky nipples bouncing as he tries to play with them with his other hand and one of your legs resting on top of the counter as you could feel the way his balls slapped against your clit as he pounded into you.

"maybe if you weren't fucking me like this I'll wouldn't be making so much noise to wake up bam." you manage to say.

"as if you weren't loving it." he responds with a hard thrust and a mischievous look on his face.

"can't fucking deny It." you moan back at him. pushing your chest back into the counter so you could move with him.

jungkook's so horny he also moans but it's still not so loud for likeㅡto wake up bam and to be honest at this point, you just wished bam was having a good ass sleep given to how horny the both of you were because it was also getting harder and harder to keep quiet.

grabbing both your buttocks, jungkook opens them up just so he could watch the way your pussy swallowed his juicy dick and indeed, you were taking him so well..

"pussy so good, fuck. I'm in love with you." he exhales and that makes you breathlessly chuckle, he was just saying whatever at this point even thought that was.. very much true.

"fuck.." he hisses. "best fucking pussy in the world." too far too gone, jungkook whispers to himself.

"I'm gonna fucking cum if you keep fucking me back, princess." he forewarn you.

"then do it." but you love to dare him.

"hmm.." he groans. "I really don't want to." he cries.

"then why do you sound so desperate?" you tease, turning your head back glancing at him with a smug face when you know damn well you shouldn't because he can't do anything about it and because jungkook tends to get almost insane when you get like this.

so if you continued.. you're afraid bam will definitely wake up.

so for your.. pussy safesty and bam's sweet dreams, you stop your teasing games (for today) and start moving back for him. still wanting to make him cum.

"come on baby.. don't you want to cum inside of me? hm?" you moan with a very needy tone. the one that makes him weak.

"fuck. stop it right now." he pants.

"huh? you said this will be quick and I really can't stand being in silence anymore." you cry and this time you mean it as in youㅡnot trying to provoke him. "all I want is you cumming hard in me." you continue as your hips push back at him everytime he slammed back into you. "d-don't you want it?"

"you know well I fucking do."

and with that, jungkook takes your leg off the counter, pressing both your legs together again as your cunt tightens around his dick and suddenly your whole world started spinning.

fingers grasping the counter's edges, he pounded on you hard and messy, his big dick glistening, his mouth slightly biting your shoulders connected with sloppy kisses everytime he got closer to you. - your legs were almost floating above the counter with each one of his thrusts, one better than the other.. your stomach and core carrying all of the weight and it's all because of your tight grip.

your moans were starting to sound loud so jungkook wraps a hand around your mouth, shutting them off.

"I'm gounna cium." you mumble against his palm but jungkook surely understands. giving you just what you want.

"shit, shit-" jungkook starts hissing as soon as you do with your walls pulsating around his hard dick. he cums too and he cums hard.

his cum makes a mess round your hole as he keeps thrusting passing throught the euphoric feelings.

pulling out, a waterfall of cum falls down your thighs and jungkook lazily smiles to himself.

both feeling completely out of breath, go one by one in order to clean up. cringing at the sticky feeling once you both were cold enough. - when you're still on the bathroom, jungkook uses this moment to check up on bam, finding him soundly sleeping like the angel he is. jungkook endearingly smiles to himself.

"I can't believe we did it." jungkook whispers as soon as he approaches you.

"huh?" you hum, drying up your face. "what'd you said?"

"bam." jungkook smiles, taking you onto his arms. "he didn't wake up." pinching both of your cheeks very gently.

"really?" you gasp. "we.." then pause. "oh my god we are so good?" crunching your nose, you inmediately laugh. taking care of still not doing it so loud.

jungkook follows your laugh while rolling his eyes.

"you're so silly." he stated as he softy flicked your forehead.

"hey! why are you like this!"

"because I love you."

"ha! I know." you laugh. "you just fucked me before eating first. can you believe that?" you tease him. "like when in all occasions have you ever denied food over a good fuck?"

jungkook rolls his eyes once again, faking being annoyed as he searched for his sandals.

"for that exact same reason." he says. "you are that good fuck. my one and only." he grins, glancing up at your face as he signals you to follow him.

and you do. "you didn't had to get all cheesy now..." you bleat.

he laughs. "why? are you embarrased, huh?" sliding your arms around your chest as he back hugs you walking towards the glass door.

as you don't respond back, he leaves a quick peck to your cheek, before opening the door. "come on, let me make you something delicious." holding your hand.

"suddenly?" you say, entralacing fingers.

"eung." he quickly nods his head. "at the end of the day, you're still one of my best clients when it comes to my food." with a bright smile on his face.

"just one?" you tease, arching one eyebrow. "who's the other one?"

"myself." and he laughs to himself.

you swear you could never take him seriously. but even when he said lame things like these.. you still loved him very much and it's just.. that if he wasn't like this, you wouldnt think you'll be as in love as you are of him.

so that's why you punch his chest. "now you're the silly one."

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insidetheacademy · 5 years ago

Text

Say You Love Me

pairings: Peter Parker x Reader (peter and reader are both 18+)

summary: in which reader wants Peter but Peter is happy in his relationship

warnings: angst angst angst and bad writings

gif credits: tomholland (i cant tag them:-(!)

part ii part iii part iv part v

the birds were chirping outside of my apartment signaling to the flocks of other birds to go home as the sun was going to set. you were sitting on the couch with your phone in hand scrolling through instagram when a message notification dinged and it read a familiar name “peepee”. you read the message and it said “what are you up to?”, you hover your thumb to the notification and send a quick reply “hello to you too– i’m currently on my couch just hanging. how about you, spiderboy?”.

surprisingly after a few seconds he replied, it wasnt quite like him to reply fast enough due to him patrolling often when the sun goes down but you guessed maybe he’s taking a break from it.

“do you maybe want to eat sushi? i’m super hungry,” he said, you then shoot back “sure why not. i’ll meet you at our usual spot,”. your phone dinged yet again but you didnt need to look at it as it would probably be him saying okay.

you went to your wardrobe and picked out a black top with a pair of jeans nothing too flashy. you wouldnt want to dress up just for some silly “eating with your friend” kind of date plus you knew that Peter would dress down anyway so why not do the same? after you grabbed your bag and your phone you headed out to meet Peter.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

as you walked into the sushi restaurant, you stopped to search for Peter, your eyes then stopped when you saw a brunette boy with the biggest grin who’s sitting at a table next to the sushi counter waving at you. you head over to him and exchanged hi’s.

“how’s it going, spider boy?” you asked cheekishly, he rolled his eyes and replied “the same old same old. Aunt May’s out of town for the next few days,” you nodded in response. “i must say, tonight you’re looking quite marvelous,” he said sarcastically not knowing the butterflies in your stomach that he just set free. you sticked out your tongue at him and say “you’re not being slick, Parker,” he laughed it off and continue to look at the menu. the waiter then came to take your order.

once the both of your orders came, the both you digged in straight away. the whole time they were eating it was filled with laughters, chewed food shown on your tongue to him and light conversations. after you were done eating, you split the bills.

whilst walking back home, he asked you “hey, y/n, how do i ask a girl out?” you laughed at him and said “i dont know, Pete?? i guess try giving her flowers and then hit her with the big ol’ question.” he nodded mentally taking note eventhough it was so simple an ant could remember it. you hoped and pray that this girl is you.

you were curious to know who was this girl, you tried asking him but he said its a surprise. you would’ve thought that you stopped here but oh no, you tried pushing Peter into spilling it but he refused to do so.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

it was 8am on a Saturday and your phone was vibrating so loud. what an annoying sound you thought to yourself, trying to get back to sleep as it would most probably some unknown caller. it stopped. well, for awhile then it got to ringing again, frustratedly you got out of bed to look at your phone and it was Peter calling.

“you better have some good explanation on why you’re calling me at 8am on a Saturday, Parker.” you said sternly to him to which then he respond with “uh, yeah, so i’m trying to buy flowers for the girl i’m asking to prom and i don’t know what kind of flowers are girls into,” you mentally palm yourself to his idiocy and replied “get a rose. its cliché but its kinda romantic in a way, i guess,” how the hell were you supposed to know what other girls like? all you know was that you liked sunflowers and allisium. so you asked him to get the most basic flower, a rose. he thanked you and immediately end the call. great! now you can go back to sleep.

time skipped to 8pm, you were lying on you bed just listening to a song by Heart Attack Man. you were just vibing to the song when the doorbell rang. you paused the song and went straight to the door. you opened the door to meet a brown eyes and a curly haired boy, he was smiling like crazy. you looked at him weird, “what’s up, Parker?” he then proceed to hug you and he literally squealed “I asked Jane to go to out and she said yes!” your heart shattered to million pieces.

not gonna lie, you thought he was gonna ask you. i guess he was still pretty clueless about your feelings towards him. he went on and on and on about Jane’s reaction when he asked her. you couldnt do anything except smiled and nodded at him. though it was breaking your heart you couldnt do anything.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

it has been a year since Jane and Peter are a thing. ever since he has gotten together with Jane, Peter had bailed you so many times. it happened frequently to the point where you had stopped texting him altogether.

you tried moving on, tried going on dates with loads of people. even people who are not your type. well eventually you found one guy, his name was Sam. he was actually kinda perfect but you broke things off with him but the feeling was mutual. you both decided that the both of you are too busy.

you were walking at a park when you saw Peter with a girl beside him. he caught your eye and gave you the hugest smile ever. you noticed his familiar warm smile but you chose to ignore it and look at the opposite direction. “y/n, wait up!” you immediately stopped in your tracks as he stop running to you taking a deep breath, you look at him pitifully.

he asked you the usual catching up stuffs. you were trying hard to not cry when Jane came to him and greet him “hey babe! who’s this?” Peter then introduced you to Jane “Jane this is y/n. my best friend.” you exchanged smiles with Jane, she then said to Peter “i gotta go home now, babe. i got work tomorrow.” they pecked each other on the lips before she goes and you wanted to puke.

you were awfully silent when you’re with him, he couldnt help but noticed it “is everything alright, y/n? you’re not your usual self.” you wanted to cry at his words. you try to control yourself and try to tell him the truth, “can I be honest with you Pete?” he nodded frantically and you continued “i... i kinda like you. i have always liked you since high school. i want you for all of my life. i had someone during the time we stopped talking, but everytime he kisses me, i wish it was you. everytime he hugs me, all i could think about was your-“ Peter cuts you off with a stern voice “thats enough,”

you were taken aback by his voice and the fact that he cuts you off mid sentence. you looked at him trying to hold back the tears, “y/n, look, i like you too but as a friend. i’m happy now with Jane and i wouldnt change it for the world. i am sorry that you like me but you have to find another.” you winced at the words that he said and you couldnt help but walk away.

you were sobbing absentmindedly on your bed, holding to your dear heart. this is what you expected him to say. this is what you had expected to happened. it was all like a nightmare. you pinched yourself so many times wishing that it was to wake up in his arms while they were cuddling watching a boring movie but it isnt and you had to accept it.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

a/n; feedbacks are welcomed!! and so are questions!’ everythinge is welcome, i am so bored with locking myself for another 2 weeks!!!

#peter parker angst #peter parker #spiderman #tom holland #tom holland smut #peter parker smut #avengers #marvel cinematic universe #mcu #tom holland x reader #peter parker x reader #god help me

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lolabangtan · 5 years ago

Text

if you can hear the ocean waves | myg

Two dumb childhood friends embark on a trip to the seaside – as they try to figure out what they will do with their lives if they can’t neither be with each other nor cut off their lifelong crush.

Word count: 6k

Warnings: tooth-rotting fluff, dumb and dumber in love, a little bit of angst, friends to lovers, mutual pining, soft femdom, drunk sex (non vaginal), infidelity, degrading kink.

# sub!yoongi, dom!reader, oral sex (female receiving), dry humping, fingering, semi-public sex, anal fingering, rim job, spanking, yoongles is a baby boy.

“It’s crazy. How can I hear the ocean in a seashell?”

“It’s most likely that it’s the ocean itself. The seashells captures this noise, and it resonates inside.”

When Yoongi offered you to go with him on a work trip to the sea, you expected to be locked up in the hotel day and night, waiting for him to return from all the meetings and work commitments, or snooping around the city by yourself. That’s why you had a hard time accepting.

Yoongi complains with a hiss. “Misery guts,” he calls you.

However, there you are, lying on the sand at first thing in the morning, drunk on fruit juice and stuffed with grilled meat. Time is not a concept anymore.

“I think I got it figured it out,” he mumbles.

“Of course you do. I just explained it to you, silly,” you retorted with a laugh.

Yoongi sits up on the sand and stares at the sea horizon. His pale legs almost mix with the colour palette around him. He’s gained some weight, too, since last year. Fortunately, he isn’t overworking himself anymore. “No, I mean—about the wedding.”

You hold your breath. He told you he’s been thinking about it lately, after all.

“So?”

But he just grabs his hair, muffling the sounds of his frustrated groans against his knees.

“I don’t! Hell, I can’t-I-forget about it. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

You were pretty excited about this trip, even if you’re a collateral traveller. It’s been a while since you’ve been to the seaside, so I thought you’d like to come along. It’s been a while since you two last spent some quality time together, too. Perhaps that’s why the mood seems off.

And Yoongi’s acting so weird lately, too. Since the moment you set foot off the train. When he told you he was having doubts about the wedding, you thought he was just freaking out about such a big step, as had so often happened to him, but you could tell – this time, it was different.

It was worse.

“You’re just nervous, Yoongles,” you tell him, pressing your heels against the wet sand, “How about we go back to the hotel and see if they’ve sorted out the rooms?”

He agrees. That’s the best you can do since he knows you’ll end up yelling at him and demanding that he tell you why the hell he’s acting so weird. That way, at least, you can find out if the hotel staff has fixed the problem with the room.

After you arrived this morning, exhausted after hours of train travel and how inhumanly early you had had to take it, the first thing you wanted to do at 8 am was to lie in bed and sleep for the next hundred years, but you two are rather unlucky and the first thing the receptionist said was already awful news:

My bad, sir. I think there was a problem with the reservation and we’ve booked you a double room.

“What kind of cheesy romcom is this?” grunts Yoongi in response. His neck is blushing, just like the tip of his ears. “Can’t you change that, miss? We wanted a twin room.”

“Of course, sir, but it’ll take a while. You can take a look at the hotel facilities in the meantime. The beach won’t be too crowded right now, and there are several restaurants nearby where you and your sister can have breakfast.”

You want to clarify that you are not his sister, but what’d be the point?

“It’s no problem for us to share a bed, Yoongi. I just want to sleep,” you whine, grabbing his arm.

But he shakes you away. “It’s weird.”

There it is. It is indeed weird of him to act like that, and things haven’t changed since this morning. Yoongi’s still being bashful and grumpy, more than usual, and you just can’t grasp exactly why.

And that’s how you two ended up laying on the beach after stuffing yourselves with some juice and tons of food. A pretty good way to spend your time, if they’ll ask you. And a pretty good way to avoid thinking about your best friend not being sure about his wedding, too.

Good news – the front desk clerk tells you that the problem is fixed.

After she gives Yoongi the keys, you two get on the lift and head to the room, almost running. You’re surely on the verge of extenuation.

Two beds. A window facing the sea. A minibar you won’t touch since you don’t wanna get a loan.

“Home, sweet home!” you groan, already feeling sleep taking its toll on you, “Have they told you your working schedule yet? To be honest, knowing the guy, I thought your boss would fill up your ass with assignments as soon as you set foot in town.”

“Fortunately, he hasn’t. Don’t jinx it,” retorts Yoongi as he finally reaches the wardrobe.

Raising your left foot, you push your bed against his. “Oh, no!” you yelp then, “There’s only one bed!”

He reacts to your antics with a scoff.

“God, I’m so tired,” he mumbles while grabbing a bunch of clothes from his open luggage, “Can’t wait to throw myself on the bed.” Yoongi then heads to the bathroom but turns to look at your frowning face. “What?”

“Are you embarrassed to change in front of me?” you ask.

Honestly, you’ve been acquainted with his peepee since he was as tall as a chair. He even asked you, when he was twelve, if it was too short after he pulled down his trousers in the middle of your room. You can’t remember hearing your mother laugh louder than when she came in and saw your puzzled face.

No, Yoongi-ssi, it’s not small. Pull up your trousers so you two can come downstairs for a snack.

You often wonder if her reaction had been so calmed since you had a brother, and you also hope that it is something all boys think about at some point in their lives, and not that Yoongi was the only boy in school who had shown her penis to his best friend in need of feedback.

His voice brings you back to reality. “No, it’s just – it’s cold in here. I’d rather change somewhere warmer, and the bathroom’s got a heater.”

Nodding, you see him disappearing through the door and decide to change there. After all, acting as weirdly as he will only make things worse, or at least incredibly awkward. So, you grab the hem of your shirt and pull up, feeling the chills down your spine. It’s pretty cold, in fact.

“Did you-” Yoongi comes back from the bathroom but stops as he sees you. “Sorry, I— I’ll brush my teeth while you change.”

You don’t really wanna force him to see you half-naked, as weird as that sounds, so you nod and thank him.

Once you’re finished, to tell him he can come in. “Which bed do you want?” you ask.

“The one that’s closer to the bathroom. You know I get up to pee a lot during the night.”

Nodding, you sit down on the other one and stare at him as he grabs the blankets and shoves himself in. “About what you said earlier— are things okay between you two?” You sound like a vulture and you know it, but you do it because you care about him.

Yoongi nods in silence, so you let it be and you get into bed too.

“Cuddles,” he demands anyways, like it’s something he can’t help asking, and it’s enough for you to get it.

You still don’t believe his fiancée is okay with him spending an entire weekend with a girl-friend, even if you’ve known each other since the very day his mother pushed him out of her womb. But it’s okay, because you’ve been doing it all your life.

It just makes you cringe in pain – how out of the question it’d be. “Spoilt baby boy,” you mock, embracing him in your arms.

Truth is that things have been a little weird since you guys finished high school a few years ago. As you grew up, the film of innocence surrounding your friendship went away, and pretending to be his friend became more difficult.

You let yourselves be guided by the rest, and all they said was ‘if you’re not going to date, you can’t keep being friends the way you used to’, and they were right.

Two grown-up adult friends planning sleepovers, sleeping together, changing in front of each other – it couldn’t possibly be okay. So, that must be why he’s being like this. Things had indeed got weird since you realised you’d fallen in love.

Why is he like this? Being all weird one second and cuddly and bubbly the next one.

As for Yoongi himself, he knows perfectly well why. It’s stupid, and pointless, too. But he wants to be close to you, be held by you, be with you. And he knows it’s going to end at some point.

Yoongi’s life is full of pointless why not’s, while the only ‘why not’ that matters is the one he’s not brave enough to do. Why not? Well, there are tons of reasons why not to tell you he’s in love with you, and the main one is that he knows you don’t love him back.

Why not ask this girl he met at this class out? It’s not as if the woman he’s in love with will ever reciprocate his feelings. Why not keep dating her? It’s not as if he wants to stay single forever and embarrass his parents more than he’s already done pursuing music. Why not ask her to marry him? It’s not as if they haven’t been dating for years now.

Hugging each other, you fall asleep almost instantly.

The sun hits you in the face. You can’t go back to sleep, you’re awake, so you turn around to see that lucky honey boy Min Yoongi is still asleep. Then you check the phone – it’s past lunchtime.

“Yoongi,” you whisper, “Yoongi, wake up. Don’t you have work to do?”

He grunts something in his sleep, tangling his arms around you and pulling you closer. God, you hate this, you hate this sudden drive you’d get to kiss him until he’s flushed and panting and putty in your hands.

“Wake the fuck up, you good-for-nothing.”

“Five more minutes, please,” he mumbles against your shoulder.

It’s sunny outside, the typically beautiful spring day, when summer is around the corner but the weather is not mortally hot yet. And you’re purely for leisure, so you may as well enjoy now the sunlight you haven’t been able to get these past few winter months.

“I’m going out to the terrace,” you say, getting out of the bed. As you expect, Yoongi remains silent.

You take a book on your way out and lie on the white plastic lounger that looks like it’s gonna break as soon as you get your ass on it.

Opening your novel, you lie down anyways, intrigued about what’s going to happen in the next chapter. That’s how you spend the next thirty minutes, until Yoongi comes out to the terrace, frowning at the sudden sunlight and probably still half-asleep, looking for you.

“Hey, I just checked and the hotel bar is reserved for a birthday party.”

You finally look away from your book. “Do you already know anything about that work stuff you have to do?”

“I just woke up, Y/N— I have no idea,” he grumbles on his way in.

Yoongi is so bloody stressed. You can see it in the way his heavy eyelids shut, appreciating the sudden chance to rest a little; or how his voice breaks as he almost growls because he has no energy to speak louder.

Whatever is behind him acting like that, it has to be worrying him almost more than what he can handle.

When he invited you to come along to this trip, you assumed that he had to meet with a client and work on a song for them. There’s no other reason you can come up with, and you’re still his best friend, you still want him to feel better.

“How about we find somewhere to buy some drinks and spend the rest of the day in here?”

He looks surprised at your proposal. “I thought you’d like to see the sea.”

“Not right now,” you retort, getting up and approaching the railing, “People saw how good the weather is and are crowding on the beach. It’s all full of kids and middle-aged drunks.”

You and Yoongi decide to stick to the plan of buying alcohol and getting drunk in the room after going out to lunch.

Stuffed once again with food and already tipsy-but-actually-more-like-half-drunk, you catch up on the terrace, talking about upcoming projects and happy incidents that have happened to you lately.

It’s already getting dark and, just as you expected, he doesn’t bring up the wedding again.

It’s not until childhood memories come to the scene that you realise how much you had missed talking to him like this. Two old hands talking about the past as if time was a treasure rotting in the depths of your memory.

Yoongi gets up and stumbles on his way to the room. “We ran out of whisky.”

“And more ice,” you remind him.

You wait for him to come back, but it doesn’t seem to be happening any time soon. The door to the inside of the room is still opened, so you get up to check if Yoongi has perished on his way to the minibar.

He hasn’t. Not entirely, at least— Yoongi is squatting in front of the tiny fridge, savouring the cold air coming out of it. He seems to be in some kind of out-of-body trance.

When you call his name, he turns his head and nods, grabbing the last bottle of whisky and the ice.

“What’s with you lately? Do you wanna talk about it?” you ask, determined to find out at last what the bloody hell is wrong with him, as you follow his petit, sneaky figure back to the terrace. “Fuck, Min Yoongi, really.”

You sit back on the lounger to watch him pour you a glass of whisky instead of answering your question. He’s visibly drunk, and so are you.

That’s probably the reason why, when Yoongi handles you the glass, bending over you, so close that he’s almost pressing his nose against yours – you can smell the whisky in his breath – he looks down at your lips and kisses you.

The drink falls to the floor, breaking into a thousand pieces, as he jerks back. “Sorry. Sorry, Y/N, it-it looked like a good idea. I-”

But you smile, cupping his face so he doesn’t run away again. “It was, Yoongi.”

Then you kiss him back. Yes, it seems like a good idea in your mind. You don’t need to think about it for now. You’ll think about it tomorrow. Not now, because now you have Yoongi’s lips against yours and his body slowly falling onto yours until he’s practically straddling your lap.

None of you know where is this all coming from, although you can take a glimpse at why. Years of yearning, of craving, of pent up yeah, but I’m not brave enough’s – whether it’s a mistake or a dream with consequences.

“I’m so fucking wet.” You feel him tremble over you. “And it’s all your fault. What are you gonna do to fix it?”

Yoongi stares at you in awe. “Now? Right here? Out in the open?”

“Don’t you want to?” you ask, and you want him to be as honest as he can be at this moment.

“Fuck, of course— of course I want to,” he says, taking a deep breath against your still clothed cunt.

Two lifelong fantasies come true the moment he unzips your shorts and pulls them down along with your underwear: yours to be eaten out by Yoongi and Yoongi’s to eat you out.

While the warm feeling of his tongue poking between your lips brings a groan out of you, you slip a leg under his torso until you feel his erection. Yoongi hisses when he feels the pressure of your shin against him and looks at you from his position between your thighs.

“You’re so hard,” you say with a smirk.

Then you rub his dick, savouring the way the honey-like whimpers coming from his lips end up being swallowed by your cunt.

As drunk as he is, Yoongi knows better. He doesn’t hump your leg like a bitch in heat until he creams his pants. Instead, he sets a pace, slow and intense at the same time, focusing on the feeling of his tongue licking your labia rather than how pathetically he’s twitching against your shin.

“Fuck, Yoongi, who would’ve thought— that such a naughty boy could do so well.”

“And I can do far better,” he mumbles, kissing your inner thighs, “You just have to let me-fuck! Let me show you. Please, Y/N, please, I-I can be so good.”

You chuckle as your leg rubs against his crotch. “Make me come and we’ll see.”

Said and done. With one last stroke of his tongue, you feel the climax crawling up to your belly, exploding and taking you with it. You thrust up into Yoongi’s mouth to ride out your orgasm, and he’s pretty happy to feel your shivering thighs tangle around his head.

If only he had a reason to convince himself that it’s impossible. For you to love him. Maybe then it would be easier to get over it and move on.

But there’s a bug in his head that makes him overthink everything: from the way you look at him to the love he can feel under your fingers when you caress him. How does he know he’s not going crazy? How does he know that whatever he does, he’s not making a mistake?

Whether it’s losing the woman of his life or wasting the chance to be with someone who’s willing to spend theirs with him.

With that thought in his head and the image of your face blushing with orgasm; of your wet, agape lips as you catch your breath but that somehow manage to show a confident smirk; then Yoongi erratically humps your leg until he moans with a threaded voice and comes in his trousers.

“Fuck,” he mumbles, pressing short kisses against your inner thighs.

Suddenly, everything goes down—the sky, the blood in his veins, reality, the weight of what you have just done, the rest of the world. All of it comes down onto his shoulders.

“I need to…” Yoongi can’t really connect the words and just gets off you, heading to the room with little balance, “I have to wash up.”

During the painful three seconds you take to tears your eyes away from him, you can see the sneaky way he fixes his trousers, but you decide to think about it later and put your shorts back on. The feeling of the wet patch of fabric against you feels uncannily cold.

When you follow Yoongi back into the room, you want to wait for him to come out of the bathroom. You wanna talk this out, make things less awkward. He just cheated on his fiancée.

Yes, you decide to wait, but Yoongi doesn’t come back on time.

By the time he finally does, you’ve already fallen asleep on the bed, and he stares at you thinking how the bloody hell is he supposed to live now that he’s been this close to your body. Yoongi can still savour you onto his tongue, he can still picture the way your legs shivered around his head when he made you come, he can still feel your warm skin against his.

You. His best friend. That’s what he is—to you, at least. That’s everything he’ll ever be. This trip just made it clearer. This bloody trip made it worse. What a fucking good idea, Min Yoongi genius.

With that in mind, along with the creeping dizziness of drinking too much, Yoongi gets in bed, his body far away from your figure but his eyes incapable of looking away from you now that you can’t look at him with disgust.

When you wake up the next morning, you see that Yoongi’s mindlessly scrolling through his phone, showing you his back.

You want to play it cool, so you smile as if nothing happened. “Good morning.”

He turns around. “Morning,” he mutters back, trying to read you. However, your niceness and your bright smile make him frown, and he ends up pursing his lips. “I… My head hurts so fucking much. We shouldn’t have drunk two bottles of whisky last night.”

There are many things you two shouldn’t have done last night but, for some reason, you’re both happy and terribly devastated that he thinks guzzling three bottles of whisky was the worst one.

He doesn’t remember a thing.

“How about we get a shower and head to the restaurant? I’m starving,” you say.

It’s Saturday already and Yoongi still doesn’t know anything about what work he’s supposed to do there. “Sure. I’ll go first, if you don’t mind.”

You nod.

Even once you’re alone in the middle of the bed, you can still feel Yoongi’s ghostly warmth pressed on the blankets. You hate moments like this; when you think how great it’d be to cuddle him and pet his hair. Now, the feeling is worse, because you can’t erase the memory of his kitten-like lips eating you out.

The sudden sound of a phone takes you out of your painful thoughts and you reach out to see who is calling Yoongi. When you read ‘Kim Minhyuk work’ on the screen, you decide to pick up—it might finally be the assignment he has been waiting for all this time.

“Yoongi-ssi.” The caller doesn’t even let you talk. “I’m Kim Minhyuk, the project manager. I know you’re on holidays, and I hope you’re having as much fun as possible, but I need you to send me the demo from the last-”

It takes you a few seconds to process the new information, but as soon as you do, you have to force yourself to breathe in and out to contain the urge to throw the phone to the wall. “Yoongi isn’t here right now.”

“Oh, I see—can you tell him to send me the demo ASAP, then? I’m Kim Minhyuk,” repeats the man.

“Sure.”

The guy Minhyuk hangs up and you put Yoongi’s phone back from where you picked it up, but your mind is somewhere else. He is on holiday? It doesn’t make any sense, but at the same time, it puts all the pieces together.

“Y/N!” you hear from the bathroom, “I heard my ringtone. Did anyone call me?”

You don’t really know what to do right now. On one hand, you want to beat the shit out of Yoongi until he tells you what the hell is going on.

On the other hand, you can’t help feeling hurt that he lied to you.

“It was Kim Minhyuk, your project manager. He’s sorry that he’s had to call you during your holidays, but he wants you to send him some demo song. Also, he hopes you’re having fun at the beach.”

It takes him a few seconds to understand the situation, but Yoongi eventually does—and a deep blush takes over his ears and neck. “I can’t keep lying, can I?” he says with an embarrassed chuckle, “It’d be pointless.”

“Kinda,” you agree.

Your silence moves Yoongi into spilling his guts, although now the entirety of his face is flushed and reddened, and he’s fidgeting, butt sitting still on the hotel room bed.

“I need to ask you a question first.” It’s not until he sees you nodding that he speaks again. “Do you want me to get married?”

You stare at him in silence, again. What kind of question is that? Of course you don’t. But Yoongi reads your puzzled face and cringes at the idea of having ruined everything. For a moment, you’re glad he can’t remember anything of what happened last night.

As certainly as it is that it’ll remain in your head as your most cherished memory.

“Even after what happened yesterday?” he continues.

Oh. So Yoongi does know. He just has been getting along with your apparent amnesia. That makes you wonder what on earth does he actually think about it.

“I don’t,” you say.

Fair enough. What is life if you don’t live it with a little bit of courage?

“What?”

Chuckling, you repeat yourself. “I don’t want you to get married, Yoongi. I’ve never wanted you to. But what else can I do? You’re my best friend. I can’t just tell you, ‘hey, don’t marry her’. Don’t you agree?”

“Yeah, it makes sense.” Yoongi then nods with a smile that is crying on its own.

“It’d be selfish to put my feelings before yours.”

He holds your intense gaze, trying to figure out what that means—trying to figure out if that means what he thinks, what he hopes it means.

“We’ve been talking.” Yoongi’s voice breaks. “She asked me if I really wanted to get married and, well, I couldn’t keep lying to her anymore. She doesn’t deserve it. She… She deserves better, she deserves someone who’ll love her with all their might. Someone who can love her the way husbands should love their wives.”

“And you are not that someone?” you ask weakly.

Yoongi finally gathers enough courage to look up at you. “Not to her. I… I want to be that person to someone else, if she’ll let me… I’ve always been your best friend. Small, grumpy, anxious, introvert—totally not like you. How could I think that you-that you’d ever see me that way?”

He’s going full throttle now with his declaration of love, for better or worse. If it’s up to you, it’s for better, of course. So, you take pity on him and crawl across the bed towards him.

“I do see you that way. I always have, in fact.”

Just like he did yesterday, Yoongi cups your face and kisses you. Shyly at first, although you try to encourage him putting your hands over his to pull him towards you.

“You’ve been so dumb, lying to me like that,” you growl against his lips, “It really makes wanna be mean.”

“Be mean to me, please. I deserve it.”

You let out a groan of frustration and bite his bottom lip. “Fuck it, Yoongi, you can’t just say something like that and expect me not to go fucking berserk.”

“Then do it!” he cries, thrusting up into nothing. He’s already hard. “Go fucking berserk on me! As fucking berserk as you fucking want! Shit, Y/N, I’m gonna come all over myself without you even touching me and it’s going to be all your fault!”

“And you were crying me to punish you two seconds ago. Turn over.”

He obliges immediately, and you straddle his back, grabbing his chin to pull him towards your chest so he doesn’t even think that you’re going soft on him.

“You’re a fucking slut. A bit of spanking will do you good. What do you think? Hm?” But you stick two fingers in his mouth, and all he can say is a babbled ‘yes’ as drool leaks down his lips. “Can’t hear you, babydoll.”

Yoongi is sucking and licking your fingers wet, soaking almost. “Y-yes, yes, please!” he manages to say despite his tongue being rather unavailable.

This has all escalated so bloody quickly, but you can’t say you’re not enjoying it. After feeling him coming over your leg, you can’t just have enough of him and his whines, of the way he’s offering himself to your touch.

Once Yoongi’s finally silence again, you kiss him again. “So, since you remember what happened last night, let me tell you,” you whisper in his ear, fingers lingering on the back of his throat and making him gag. The goosebumps he’s getting right afterwards taste like honey. Your honey boy, always. “I haven’t forgotten how hard you came back then when you humped my leg as you ate me out.”

Yoongi doesn’t answer—he just lowers his head, embarrassed not only by your words but also by how much they’re turning him on.

“Take off your clothes.”

The man turns his head to look at you. “Fuck, yes. We’re-we’re doing this?” he then asks, stripping immediately.

Licking your lips, you decide to stare at his body instead of answering to whatever he’s told you. He has definitely gained some weight. He looks like a fucking meal and you haven’t had eaten yet—Yoongi’s gonna be your breakfast.

Once you have him back into his former position, you can now stare at the back, too. At his soft thighs, as his squishy ass, at the sneaky vision of his balls and his hard, dripping little cock.

You fix your eyes on his entrance. “You can’t come until I say so, you hear me?”

He nods eagerly, so you take a hold on his hips to keep him still and kiss his inner thighs, making him wince against your hot lips.

“Relax,” you coo.

Focusing back on his butt, you pool some spit on your tongue and keep it loose, teasingly licking his entrance up and down. Once you feel your tongue getting tired, you use it to poke in, but only let in the tip.

Yoongi chokes on his groan. “Shit! Please, don’t-don’t tease.”

You decide to use your lips instead since he’s feeling so demanding today. You’ll get back at him for it later.

It isn’t until you begin to kiss his ass that Yoongi goes feral. Letting out a breathy moan—that sounds dangerously similar to a desperate, whiny whimper—he grabs the blankets with his fists and thrusts back into your mouth.

The way your nails softly scratch over his ass cheeks is a warning, one he gets immediately.

“Ready for more, babydoll?” you ask.

He nods. “Yes! I’m so close! Y/N, so close, I-I need to come, please.”

Your index finger strokes the flushed rim and, once you are sure that it is sufficiently dilated, you slowly insert it. Yoongi seems to be okay with the intrusion, so you pump it a few times to see his reaction, which is, honestly, delightful.

“That’s-” he moans. Then you bend your finger downward and rub your pad against his walls. “That’s my-shit! Yes, please, I’m gonna cum, please! Don’t stop!”

You pull your digit out of his entrance, ripping a complaint out of his lips. “Lie on your back.”

Once Yoongi obliges, you take a look at him, at how he’s splaying all over the blankets, limbs shivering and eyes glowing. The little sweat he’s exuding is concentrated under his chin, so you bend down to wipe it away and deliberately tilt up his head so he doesn’t look at anywhere else but you.

“Do you like it, baby? You like my fingers fucking your pretty little hole?”

“Fuck, fuck! Not gonna last, Y/N, not-not gonna last,” he grunts against your neck, “Please, please, cum on my cock, I don’t wanna last two pumps.” Yoongi doesn’t even know what he’s begging for anymore.

“We don’t have condoms,” you remind him.

“Yes, I know, fuck—then let me make you come first,” says Yoongi, already on the brink of his climax. He won’t last long enough for you to bring yourself to orgasm with your fingers. “Please, I can hold it, p-please. Last night I couldn’t do it as well as I could’ve.”

“Okay.”

You give in to his pleas and let him fight the urge to grind against the blankets and finish up himself. The way his dick twitch, resisting the orgasm, makes your mouth water.

“Sit on my face,” begs Yoongi.

Actually, you have a better idea. You might sprain your wrist, though, but it’s worth the try anyways.

Before raising your hips, you turn around, showing him your back. Yoongi’s not stupid, and he gets the idea immediately, helping you sit on his face as you lick your fingers to moisture them so they’re ready to get back to work.

“Shit, Y/N, this is so hot,” he mumbles, nuzzling your wet core.

Yoongi doesn’t hesitate to dive in and kiss your core, as or more eagerly than last time. Although you need a few seconds to get used to it and not push your hips against his face until you drown him, you come back to yourself, biting your lip, and insert your finger back into him.

“Yes, Yoongi, you’re doing so well,” you moan right before kissing his inner thighs. You can feel him tensing as your lips travel to his hole. “I’m gonna fuck your ass so well, baby.”

Instead of answering, he just gives your clit a more intense suck, lapping it with his tongue.

Your hand practically ravishes his entrance, going in and out, rubbing his prostate as his hips adapt to your pace so he can get the best out of it, whimpering and begging for you to let him come.

Slowly, the knot inside you begins to unravel. The softness of his lips kissing your labia and sucking on your clit is mesmerising. You sink your nails onto the skin of his thighs, making him groan and fasten his ministrations.

“Baby, I’m going to come, keep going,” you say, thrusting down onto his face.

You do before he says anything, and it’s probably one of the best orgasms of your life. Probably has something to do that it is Yoongi who’s behind it. Who knows. But you moan his name anyways, riding out your climax against his tongue.

Once you can think somewhat straight again, you notice his dick twitching and his balls hardening. He’s close, too.

When you take his dick between the fingers of your free hand, putting your weight on your elbows and pumping slowly, Yoongi finally loses it. “Yes! Yes, yes! I’m coming, please, kiss it, kiss it, Y/N, so-so good! Please, please!” he moans against your core, completely tense and strained.

It’s just a lick, a short stroke of your tongue onto his tip but, added to all the teasing and edging, it’s enough to make him shot his load, staining your hand.

He begins to come down from his high. “You did so well, babydoll.”

Yoongi can barely help you get off him, but he tries anyways, and you end up getting out of the bed so you can go to the bathroom and get yourselves some tissues. Your cum-stained hand isn’t going to clean itself.

“I know this is… I know this isn’t really the time to ask this but—what are we?” he asks as you clean his belly.

“I don’t know.” With a sigh, you throw away the dirty tissue. “You’re still engaged, Yoongi. I think you should talk to your fiancée first. Before talking about anything with me. You’ll have to explain the situation to her so you don’t hurt her.”

Yoongi chuckles. “She knows. I told her—about my feelings for you. We met the day she found me crying in the restroom of our school after you posted a picture with your new boyfriend.”

You raise your eyebrows, stunned and hurt that you were so fucking blind, but your grimace quickly vanishes when you feel him hugging your waist. Cuddles, he demands with his eyes, as always. And you oblige, as always.

Everything’s silent, pleasantly so. You can hear the ocean waves.

Don’t hesitate to like, reblog, and leave some feedback if you liked it! It’s always good and encouraging to know what you think <3

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dearestlouis · 4 years ago

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𝑫𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒖𝒔𝒃𝒂𝒏𝒅,

Today is our 6th month of being together and I'm so happy to have you in my life. I'm not a perfect one for you, but you always told me that I'm the prettiest ever. Who's lucky? Absolutely me. Through this, I want to show you that there are so many people who support us. And I'd love to welcome the baby together with you. We shall to hold each other's hands tightly, I love you the most! xx

𝑨 𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒔 :

⋆ Hello, dearest Joy and my twin Johnny.

I'm so glad to see this couple at first. You guys look so great together and I must say that you guys are the best couple I've ever seen! I wish you guys nothing but happiness; I hope your marriage life will always be romantic and last long. Can't wait till I see you guys have a kid.👀 Wishing all of the best for you guys! —JOHNTSUH

⋆ Starting off this message to Johnny oppa and Joy unnie for reaching another month together! It probably was not an easy road but both of you went through it well together and I hope it'll stay that way for a loooong time! Congratulations and happy monthsary once again! 🥳 — KlMSOHYUNN

⋆ MEMLO LOVEBIRDS! Congratulations for reaching another happy moment together. I hope both of your love will keep getting bigger every day! Thank you for taking care of my unnie well ❤️ stay longlast! —KAGNMlNAH

⋆ Hello Joy and her husband, I am very happy to see you have come this far and I hope you will be together forever. Your marriage is proof and witness that your love will always be united until your hair turns white. I pray for your good, make it last guys. 🤍 —roisiepark

⋆ Hello, Johnny hyung and Joy noona. J2(?) so there will be J3? i believe it will since Joy noona is having something called cutiebean inside her tummy right? i'm so happy for the two of you. Wow time flies that quick now Johnny hyung will become a father, Joy noona will become a mother and i will become an .... uncle? omg congratulations to both of you i'm very happy for both of you! not only that, i also want to congratulate you both for spending 6 months together. it is quite a long time, you guys have gone ups and downs together for so long. I hope you two will always be happy, your time always filled with love and always cheerish each moment together. I'm beyond happy for both of you. 🤍 — HENDEURl

⋆ happy monthsary lovebirds! anyways, as you guys going to be a parents soon, i have a strong feeling that this is the beginning of many great things. have fun discovering the surprises and perks of being parents. i will keep you in my prayers and also thank you so much for making me an auntie. can't wait to meet your ray of sunshine💛 — withlovewheein

⋆ Hello there, my sweetest brother and his beloved! I am feeeeling so great to hear that both of you have reached the sixth months of living with each other. I only have one wish that i want both of you always stay together and sharing bunch of memories together. Thank you for taking care of my brother, and please love him and take care of him well. 🥺 Happy 6th monthsarry! 💗 — Kakak Ayel sayangnya Tobi.

⋆ Good day, johoenny the peepee 👉🏻👌🏻💦 HAHAHAHAHA.

First of all, damn your wife is sweet ay. I can see now why you were so eager to make the baby🤡

But well! Happy 6th monthsarry to both of you🔥🔥🔥 it may be a short yet long journey but i know both of you can last really really long. Hope you 2 will stay sweet and lovey-dovey like this.

And also for Joy, i wish the best for your pregnancy! Im sure the baby will be as strong as the parents *lets pray that johnny's horny genes wont get into the baby 🤡*.

Best luck for everything, guys!

P.s please do tell me the birth date so i can come unlike the wedding 💀 — bobbyrxnika

⋆ Hi, lovebirds. It’s been a while since my last wishes on your wedding day and now i’m gonna throw some words again for you two. So, how’s your marriage life? It’s fun right? Even i don’t really know how you treat each other, but i can see Johnny can be a perfect husband for Joy since she always talk about how lovely Johnny is. And i’m very thankful for keeping my sister safe with you, Johnny. Also, congratulation soon-to-be parents! Promise i will buy some good stuffs for my niece/nephew later! I hope you both will only meet the happiness in life for a very long time! ♡

Sincerely,

kembang desa cicaheum.

⋆ Happy 6th monthsary, my favorite love birds.

May you both love and care for each other as you do today till infinite. may you create countless memories in coming years and grow stronger each day. may this monthsary be magical enough to add great love, care, and compassion in your live.

With love,

Vira [TAENGIM]

⋆ Hello to the cutest couple ever, Johnny oppa and Joy unnie! First thing first, thank you so much for inviting me to your wedding (it is one of the most memorable things that I’ve ever had in this world!) so for you two.. I wish you two for always be surrounded by happiness. Please enjoy all those quality time you could spend together. I hope nothing would butt into you two’s happiness. Stay healthy and happy! <3

Love, Siyeon.

⋆ To the most adorable and sweetest couple on earth, Alodie and Louis, congratulations for reaching up another milestones in your relationship! I notice how both of you being a simp for each other and that's wonderful. Louis, I would bid my utmost thanks for taking care of Odie really well, you know I always count on you when it comes to her. May both of you be blessed with happiness and more love for another upcoming journey, another anniversaries, to no end. Keep on sailing and be happy, always.

With love,

Buna Lily.

⋆ Happy 6th Monthsarry to you, lovebirds! 🕊❤️

There’s nothing as wonderful as seeing a happily married pair. Your happiness always reflects by the smile in your face and the delight in your eyes. And I as Alodie's beloved mom would like to personally thank Johnny for taking a well care of my daughter. Thank you for making her the happiest she ever been! May the love you have for each other continue to blossom like a rose with each of the passing month (and even year). You have all my greatest wishes and blessings. 🤍 And oh, I'm praying all the best for the baby too. 😜 Grow healthily, little one.

With love,

Adrianne L. Edelstein

⋆ Congratulations for being 6 months together with Joy unnie. Thank you for taking care of her well and make her happier than before. The road is still long way to go, so, i hope the love will always lights up the way. Please always be the lovely couple and lovely siblings for me.

— Kim Yerim

⋆ Best wishes to both of you on your Monthsary. May the love that you share last your lifetime through, as you make a wonderful pair. Happy Monthsary Johnny hyung and Joy noona.

- Doy

⋆ This message is aim to the dearest couple, Alodie and her husband. Time flies, I bet your relationship as a husband and wife is finally reaching a month old. Congratulations for that, I sincerely happy for you two. I wishes both of you to be happy with each other and I wish it'll wrapped with abundant blessing, jolity, and prosperity around so you could have the dream life you've dreamt about. Long live the couple! ♥️

— Calliope, X.

⋆ Happy mensiversary, Joy unnie with her beloved husband. 💗 May the ties that bind you grow ever stronger and hold you steadfast amidst your fears and uncertainties. Never stop being each other’s best friends, and always be each other’s priorities. I love seeing you both in love. Stay this way forever! 🌹

— Aeri

⋆ Hello, Johnny and Joy, oho I just realized that you both are Js. I am here going to congratulate both of you for another months you guys have spent together. Also the fact that Johnny is going to be a daddy soon!

As for my wish is for you both to have a happy and healthy long lasting relationship, being supportive towards each other and take a good care of each other more, okay? Johnny is a good person and I trust him that he will be a good dad and husband too. Also you should love Joy more each day, or I’ll beat your peepee John. OK JK.

Happy 6th Monthsarry!

Love,

Chu.

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kosmosguk · 5 years ago

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Wrapped Up and Gifted; 7 Days of Christmas Day 1|Yandere Seokjin x Reader

Type: Smut Drabble

Description: As insufferable as your boss is, you find a small festive part in you to give him a present. You just aren’t expecting what he gives back in return.

Warning: blowjobs, what’s it called when you accidentally walk in on your boss wanking his peepee, seokjin giving switch vibes like it’s nobody’s business, subtle yandere vibes like if you squint you’d see them haha

[A/n: the next 7 days of Christmas drabble is loosely based on the yandere BTS reaction to meeting you for the first time !! I’m finally on my winter break and although this line of drabble won’t be all out in time for Christmas, my lack of school will allow me to push out a small present for my beautiful readers !! thank you for nearly 600!! Ilysm and have a warm holiday season <3 (whether or not you celebrate Christmas or winter holidays in general)]

Kim Seokjin was an asshole.

He was a Grinch, a Scrooge, a Boogeyman, and if you had to describe him, you would use every swear word in the dictionary. He picked on every aspect of a dish, spat out spoonfuls of food just because he didn’t like a certain flavor, and threw whole dishes that took hours to make into the trash. And most of all, he loved to pick on you, his merciless harassing extending from the days where you were his student into the days where you received a job at his restaurant--you were extremely surprised when you got the acceptance email; maybe, just maybe, he didn’t hate you as much as you thought he did.

He wasn’t really that bad, you supposed. Manager Kim Namjoon liked him, and Namjoon was a decent guy through and through. You used to spend lots of time with him when you started working, but Seokjin had noticed, and his biting comments turned into scathing remarks until you stopped talking to Namjoon as much. Seokjin, others had jokingly said, was probably jealous. No, you had bit back, he was just a conceited asshole.

You take it back; he was that bad. But at least he got you your job. That was something. He was known to be hard on people; others had reassured you that he was this way to all newcomers because he saw a way to shape potential. But as others got the treatment for 6 months tops, yours stretched over an expanse of a year.

Still, he deserved somewhat of a present. Hell, if he found out that you had gotten Namjoon a present, he would throw a hissy fit and the next dish you made would be tossed into the dumpster.

‘‘Chef Kim,’‘ you knocked on the door. Once, twice, no answer. You called out again,’‘ Chef Kim.’‘

That was strange. Kim Seokjin, despite how much of an ass he was, was always prompt with these things.

You opened the door, hesitantly making your way into the dimly lit office.

‘‘Chef Kim, your lights are of-,’‘ your voice cracked slightly as you took in the sight.

His chair was pushed back, and there, tilting his head slightly with his bangs clinging to his forehead from sweat, was Seokjin. Your eyes trailed the sight, taking in his flushed cheeks, his soft panting, the slick noises, and the movement of his hand... Oh. That’s why he didn’t answer the door.

You dropped the gift. The box landed on the floor with a thump, and you winced, hoping the gift hadn’t broken. The chair creaked slightly as he turned to stare at you, really, really stare at you. You swallowed heavily.

‘‘What are you doing here?’‘ his hand movements didn’t stop.

Your cheeks reddened in embarrassment--you didn’t dare think that it was anything else--and you spoke quickly,’’ I can leave. I’m-I’m sorry for walking into your office. I won’t speak of this...predicament to anyone. I’ll be go-going now.’’

You bent down to grab your gift and hightail it out of there when...

‘‘Stay,’‘ Seokjin’s voice was rougher than his usual even, clear almost-pleasant tone. You felt something squeeze slightly in the deeper parts of your stomach at the sound and slightly rubbed your inner thighs together.

‘‘Don’t you want to find out why I’m risking my reputation to do this-oh shit fuck,’‘ he broke off in a groan, and you averted your gaze,’‘ Even if I keep this up, I can’t even cum. And it’s all because of you.’‘

You froze, unable to think or speak or, hell, even breathe.

‘‘I think about you, the way you always tempt me without even knowing, and I get hard all over again. I bet you’re so tight that you would squeeze down on me,’‘ he panted out,’‘ It makes me want to put you under my control, to fucking take over until you can only think of me. So you won’t think of anyone else but me.’‘

You let out an uneven breath.

‘‘Chef Kim, this isn’t professional. We’re at work; there are chefs outside and guests and-,’‘ you were silenced.

‘‘No one will come in unannounced, not like you. Now come over here,’‘ Seokjin groaned,’’ Let me see what you have to give.’’

You found yourself taking steps forward, and you weren’t aware you were until you were kneeling in front of him, reaching out to take hold of his length. It pulsed and throbbed slightly under your touch, and you experimentally dragged your hand up and down.

‘’Shit, you feel so fucking good,’’ he hissed between clenched teeth, his hips rolling up.

You glanced at him through your lashes before pressing a soft kiss on his precum-stained tip. You gave small kitten licks, raising an eyebrow at the new taste, before stretching open your lips as wide as you could and taking in as much of his length as you could.

Seokjin groaned, his hips bucking up. His length hit the back of your throat, and you gagged, hitting his bare thighs until he dragged back and let you breathe. You pulled off, saliva staining your lips and his dick, before going back down. What you couldn’t fit in your mouth, you stroked, making soft moaning sounds as you sucked.

His hip movements got jerkier, more erratic as you stroked and licked and sucked, until you felt him let out a husky sound that was a mixture between a groan and a moan. Thick liquid filled your mouth, and you coughed at the new sensation, spitting out a mixture of semen and saliva.

He reached out to stroke your head, his movements gentle and slightly tired. You looked up, your throat aching from the thrusting as you fought for needed air.

‘‘You gave me two gifts. It only makes sense if I give you some gifts too,’‘ the stern look he usually gave was replaced by a softer one. This was the most gentle you had ever seen him.

And as you got up on shaky legs and slotted yourself onto his thigh, a whine pulled from your lips, you thought of how fortunate it was that you decided to give Seokjin a gift.

And maybe, maybe he wasn’t as much of an asshole as you had originally thought.

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zamilemzizi · 3 years ago

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A trip down lockdown memory lane!

A trip down memory lane

As my business steadily builds itself back up, with a new face and some Covid-influenced changes, I look back at what it was like for a few months last year as just the “Mom.” The South African lockdown, one of the strictest in the world at that time, forced most of us Marketing and PR SME owners to close our doors and focus on creating a safe and “new normal” environment for ourselves and our families.

My parents both contracted the Corona Virus and so, it was left up to me to care for ALL five grandchildren for a few months. Including my own children, I had two five-year-olds’ (one boy; Wandi and one girl; Koli), one nine-year-old girl (Thotse), a twelve-year-old girl (Lungi) and the legend himself, my two-year-old son (Bugsy) whom you will have read a lot about on my personal Facebook page. As if that was not enough, we rescued an eight-week-old puppy (Luna) too!

Being a person known for preferring the company of all the Mzizi grandchildren, I was up for the challenge of this time spent being reacquainted with the daily struggle of just-being-the-mom-with-no-work without the pressure of having to go to work.

I acknowledge that my experience of this time is grossly different to that of a majority of my fellow countrymen/women, who struggled to make ends meet. Zam’s Hive started a fund, which generously received funds donated by almost ALL of my clients, close friends and colleagues from my place of work. We used these funds to assist families who wrote in via WhatsApp and SMS stating what their urgent needs were and paired them with the correct donor. I was astounded at how the people I knew were able to look beyond their own experience of the Lockdown, and were able to give the little (or lot) that they had to keep hope alive.

However, being the stay-at-home mom yielded quite a few hilarious experiences, which naturally, I shared on social media as they happened. Here are some of these posts. I hope they make you chuckle a bit at my expense. I hope they remind you that no matter how bleak the situation, our inner circle, our families, our children, the people that matter most to us are the ones we should keep our focus on.

How the wars began…

Wandi’s benevolent fart

Raising boys is a BREEZE!

My Wandi has reached that age where every hug and cuddle is a conscious decision on his part to be with me. It says, ' I choose to be near YOU. I choose you, mommy'

So imagine my joy as I was working in my office and my big boy chose that moment to sit on my lap...

He sat facing me, flashed his special smile and said' 'Mommy, let me show you how much I love you'

He put his hands on my shoulders and closed his beautiful brown eyes. I could see him mentally reaching deep within himself in order to share what he had to say. Then...

I felt it. A persistent drill-like hammering on my sturdy thigh where his bony bum was perched.

The stench was instant and the fog it created in my mind was confusion personified. I could not immediately compute that my baby came all this way just to fart on me. As realization dawned on me, my little angel held onto me just a little bit tighter to keep me in place as the hammer-drill was still operating. My thin leggings were no barrier from the barrage of bodily functions battering my poor skin.

During this assault, Wandi did not change his facial expression at all. He looked like a little Buddha bestowing a blessing upon a lesser mortal.

When he was done, he nimbly sprang off my leg and bestowed a beguiling cherubic smile upon me. Slowly reversing from the room with his cheesy smile and eyes closed, he blessed me with his benevolent ' enjoy the smell mommy' and quietly closed the door.

Bugsy drinks shit water

I'm on my knees begging for this changeling to be taken. Return Bugsy pre-terrible twos to me please!

I went into the toilet for a teensy while. I'd been holding it in for some time chasing my kids around. To my knowledge, fake Bugsy was safely chilling on my bed.

As my empty bladder and I float out the bathroom, changeling proudly displays a cup of water he is drinking...now this is a problem because all taps and cups are beyond his reach. This cup looks like the dirty one I ignored on the floor a teensy while back- are you judging me Karen?!

I frantically urge fake son to show me if he got water from the other toilet. He proudly replies, ' I no drink here Wandi peepee here' This is good. It's great actually. Wandi has diarrhea and drinking from his toilet could kill someone. Never mind Corona.

So I drag the smirking not-really-my-son into the kitchen to wash this mysterious cup. At this stage I'm fuming at the lord thinking 'turn this crap into wine NOW'

As I wash the still alcohol free cup, I turn to find swopped-at-birth guy smacking his lips and drinking from the bucket mqobothi style.

MY HEART SKIPS A BEAT!

I used water and Jik to clean dog poop just now. I spilled the water but clearly not all of it. What's worse here? Jik poisoning or dog poop poisoning?

The terror child is ok. I gave him milk and surrendered the rest to his creator.

I'm ok. I have a new twitch in my eye and I think I might have peed my pants a little. But otherwise baaah I'm good.

No really.

Just fine.

Look- fake son took the tin of milk and smeared the stuff on himself.

I'm just FINE!

Then the tensions were rising

The stand off

In a bid to demonstrate his defiance of my authority, my two year old has taken the long life milk and some shopping bags to an undesirable corner of the house. He has boldly announced that, 'I puttinnnin me in noty cona' This is his strategy to deprive my authority of putting him in a corner myself. The standoff continues...

Sulking in the shower

I swear I don't make this stuff up...

Wandi just played with matches and his cousins came to tell on him. Naturally I gave him 'the look' times 10. He says to me,

'I know you're cross with me and wont talk to me.'

He stalks off to the shower and sits there while singing his new and spontaneously composed struggle song. The words weren't too clear but this is what I heard:

Take me away in peace, take me away in peace.

Please note he has taken to eating some of his meals in this shower.

Can someone please send me a bottle of gin??! Its for the kids.

The breaking point

Exacting revenge in small ways

My kids broke my hair clippers machine while I was cutting them. So now I'm leaving them with unfinished cuts because one needs to take revenge wherever the opportunity may present itself-even if it's your own kids. They think they know me. Mxim!

Mom flu strike

I've been in bed with flu for a week now. During this my kids haven't given me an inch of space and rest.

I'm still a horse, jungle gym, chef, personal snot cleaner and unwilling audience to dance shows and song decompositions.

Tonight was just the worst! I went to the chemist for more meds and so needed a nap from the trip. Only to realize that I'd over slept and it was supper time.

After a mad dash to cook, serve and feed the royal highnesses, I'd had enough.

Where am I now? What am I doing now? These are all relevant questions I'm happy to answer for you.

I'm in my bedroom. For the first time since I became a mother, I have done the only sensible thing a tired parent can do...

I'VE LOCKED MY BEDROOM DOOR BIYAAACHES!

The situation update is as follows:

Hostile!

1. Two year old has attempted breaking door down

I DON'T CARE!

2. Five year old has resorted to creepy body plastering against door and quietly chanting 'mooommyyyy can we have ice cream while you die?'

I DON'T CARE

3. In a rare show of solidarity the boys are now howling like wolves outside the door, throwing in the odd 'moooommmy where are youuuu'

I D O N T C A R E!

4. Nine year old niece has increased the volume and frequency of her coughing

IIIIIIIII DOOOOOOOONT CAAAAAAARE!

I'm at peace in my warm bed. Let the siege continue I have all that I need in here. A bathroom, all the toilet paper in the house, the only phone with airtime and did I mention -I'm the only person tall enough to cook. Muhahuahua!

They will know me!

The resolution?

Wandi prays for peace

So as usual the kids were acting up and driving me crazy before bedtime. This time however, the transgressions were extreme.

Someone didn't pee INSIDE the toilet but decided to mark his territory next to it instead.

Another decided to generously leave food on a dinner plate and put it in the kitchen sink for Santa maybe.

Another was dejectedly roaming the passage without pajama bottoms like a homeless person. Left to wander the night in shame and bottomlessness.

This was the last straw and I blew my top off.

EVERYONE TO BED WITHOUT A STORY NOW!

Even the little one understood that Armageddon was nigh, and scurried into bed as fast as his fat stubby legs could carry him (only half way up the bed usually).

In an unusually respectful and hesitant tone, Wandi bravely reminded me that I forgot to pray. So fine! I asked God to please help me make my children good etc.

Wandi again bravely offered to pray too and this is where he played his master plan into action (he never wants to pray):

Wandi: Dear God, please make all my dreams come true. The end.

Yes. He said the end and not AMEN. I felt a reluctant smile coming on but I was wise to the enemy.

The next morning the kids all came to greet me in that way guilty kids do hoping for a cease-fire.

'Good morning rakhali' etc.

Then the master played his Ace move.

Wandi: In the name of Jesus, good morning everyone!

How could I remain grumpy after my son evoked the name of Jesus?!

He's goooooood. One point to Wandi. None to me.

Please subscribe to my blog and follow me on social media for more insights into; what goes on in the life of a working mom building an empire. All the links are below. My women’s network as well as my courses are also available on this site.

#workingmama #workingmom #zamshive #liveyourbestlife #zamilemzizi #startsomething

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