#i honestly have zero idea of the quality or lack thereof of that one

[flydotnet]

Bad Things Happen Bingo! The event where you send me requests according to this marvelous card! (Red cross is the completed prompt, character headshots are prompts I’ve already filled. I don’t have any request left, so feel free to send in suggestions for this card!).

Can't you hear it? I'm fine!

I'm deeply sorry to have stolen this pure cinnamon roll's voice for the sake of a prompt fill - it just escaped me. I was supposed to write a very similar idea for "Appendicitis", but I realized it'd be a better fit for a more basic illness like this one. It does flow a little better than my first draft (that I obviously never finished), and it brought me one idea for "Voice Breaking" that seemed pretty good to me. That one is very basic because I spent a couple days in a bad mindspace and suffering from blank page syndrome, but I believe I'm having that beat by now. I'm not sure I even respected the prompt (it ain't a prompt list filled by Fly if he doesn't bend at least one prompt to propose a convenient-for-him interpretation!), nor if I wrote the characters properly. We've all got test runs, after all, and this story was one.

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Fractured Falsetto

Summary: As long as you tell others (and yourself) that you're fine, you'll be, even if everything around you says otherwise; or, at least, that's what Hikaru believes.

Fandom: Inazuma Eleven Go

Wordcount: 2.5K words

Event hosted by @badthingshappenbingo​

AO3 version available here.

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He doesn’t like the concern in Mom’s eyes nor her voice, so when she asks him if he’s fine enough to attend class because he looks a little sick, Hikaru replies he feels fine. Plus, he’s got a presentation to make in class and the team is practicing for a fairly important match after class, so he better head there so they can all train together – it’ll be better for team cohesion, right? Moreover, if he doesn’t show up, they’ll wonder where he’s gone and he doesn’t want to either anger or concern them.

Maybe he just didn’t wake up the right way, this morning. Not being full awake sometimes tricks you into thinking you’re more tired or less aware that you actually are. It’ll pass, he’s sure of it, and he’ll be able to handle practice as well as he usually does.

 It’s the middle of winter, so the air feels chilly all around, yet since it hasn’t rained in a couple days, it’s dry and irritates the airways. His throat already felt scratchy when he got out of bed, probably from how much he tends to scream when he shoots or when he needs to wind out, and the weather doesn’t make it better. Mom has allowed him to attend class as soon as he wore a mask just in case he really is sick, so at least it doesn’t cause as much annoyance as it could have. There’s that already!

He read again and again his presentation notes, last night, to the point he doesn’t remember at what time he packed his bag for the last time and went to bed. He assumes fairly late, since it was so difficult to open his eyes this morning. He supposes the urge to yawn will fade out after some time: just thinking of his upcoming presentation jolts him awake.

 Class soon begins, which doesn’t surprise him since he was a little late due to negotiating with Mom. The air inside the room is the complete opposite to outside: it’s warm and stuffy, to the point he’s sweating under his uniform, and the difference between the two makes him a little dizzy. He doesn’t remember the classroom feeling that hot yesterday, or the day before for that matter, so it’s a little weird – but he remembers a couple of his teammates (Hayami and Hamano, if he’s not mistaken) complaining about the heaters in the classrooms of Raimon and how drastically they can function from one day to the other, so it must be the heater… maybe.

(He hopes it is, at least, because at times, he feels colder than he feels warm and it’s starting to dawn on him: maybe he’s sick and is just trying not to think he is).

 His presentation goes mostly like he planned it to be. He’s not the first to go to the board nor the last, so at least he doesn’t have to worry about being the first or last impressions of the class: that’s already some sort of relief. There’s an issue, however, and it’s not because of his notes or how everyone is reacting: it’s with his throat, which won’t stop scratching, and he has to cough a little from time to time. The teacher doesn’t say anything about it, even if she must be at least a little annoyed by the sound of his voice.

When he finally gets to go back to his seat, he can’t keep a coughing fit in, prompting everyone him to stare at him, dumbfounded. He finds himself rushing to his seat in embarrasment with an unsoothable throat and his legs almost flinching. Not his day… not his day… Practice will make it better, though, he’s sure of it! It’s got to, it’s practice, with the team! With his friends! There’s no way that’ll make the situation worse.

 He eats lunch on the roof of the school, today. Well, actually, he doesn’t feel that hungry, but he needed to head somewhere that wasn’t as smotheringly hot as the school: the outside seemed perfect for that. The wind is blowing gently through the trees surrounding Raimon, with nobody speaking to break the immersion. He should probably be more concerned than that not to be as affected by the wintery cold outside, but Hikaru doesn’t quite know why: he’s just not cold.

On second thought, never mind, he’s freezing out here. The thing is, he still doesn’t want to go inside his class’s room in case he infects someone: he’s pretty sure he’s sick, by now, and the last thing he wants is to see someone catch whatever he’s infected with. It’s most likely nothing big – probably just a cold – but it can be a pain and grow into something more dangerous. He can sustain the cold a little as he tries to eat some of his bento for a couple minutes so none of that happens, right?

 To his surprise, he comes across Tenma and Shinsuke going back to their classroom on the same floor as his. He’s never seen them around, probably because he’s usually inside by this time. They run up to him, smiling, before he sees their faces change as soon as they notice he’s wearing a mask.

“Wait, are you okay, Hikaru?” Tenma asks, suddenly frowning.

“Ah, y-yeah, I’m fine!”

“You’re wearing a mask, though… Doesn’t that mean you’re sick?” Shinsuke questions, as doubtful as one could be.

“It’s just in case I am! My mom wanted me to wear it for today.”

It’s not lying to them if that’s true, right? (His voice sounds very bizarre, like it’s not even is). Neither of his teammates sound convinced, however.

“I see!” Tenma replies with one eyebrow lifted and the other still down. “We’ll see you for practice, then. See ya!”

“See you later!”

On that, both Shinsuke and he leave, waving at him before disappearing inside their classroom.

 Guilt (of having at least partially lied to his friends, of not being fully honest about his own worries) eats Hikaru more and more as afternoon classes go on. He’s now nursing a headache that prompts him to drop his pen from time to time so he can rub a temple and hope it goes away (it never does, instead it lingers and strenghtens). He’s having a difficult time following what the teacher is saying despite usually having no issue with math since, each time he tries to focus, his headache worsens and he’s left whistling the pain away under his teeth.

The itch in his throat hasn’t faded away, far from it: it’s not seizing his entire neck. He tries to keep the feeling away by clearing his throat and short bursts of coughing, but it doesn’t work. He knows it’s a vicious cycle, that the more he coughs the more his throat gets irritated; yet he can’t help it, it’s almost as if the gesture is what is keeping him calm despite the bad presentiment bubbling in his stomach about this.

 He really doesn’t want to bail out on the team.

 At some point, the teacher asks if he wants to go to the nurse’s office after a fit he didn’t manage to keep to himself (it just burst out without him being unable to do anything – he’s the first bothered by this), prompting him to finally rise his head and notice everyone’s staring at him again, except this time, he can tell they’re not so judgemental. He doesn’t like it much more than the impression he got this morning, but he supposes it’s better.

“No need, sir,” Hikaru replies, trying to put on his best smile under his mask. “I’m fine!”

His voice contradicts him, considering it sounds like glass paper, and he wonders how it’s gotten downhill so fast.

“If you say so, Kageyama.” The teacher sounds as convinced as Tenma and Shinsuke did earlier – which means not much, if any. “Simply rise your hand if you need to go there, understood?”

“Okay!”

 He doesn’t ask to go to the infirmary for the rest of the afternoon classes, instead trying to muffle his coughing fits as much as possible. Maybe he should, because the temperatures are starting to make less and less sense and everything feels heavy; but he doesn’t want anyone to worry. It’s all he can say, really, and maybe if he convinces the others, then he’ll convince himself everything is well and good.

Classes end and after them comes practice, so he runs out of the classroom with only a few “I’m all good!” to spare and heads straight for the inside soccer field. The air outside once again tries to bite at his lungs, but he only allows it to get a couple coughing fits from it. The main casualty of it is, in the end, his voice – and he’s afraid it means he won’t be able to tell everyone he’s actually not doing too bad, that he can actually practice with them for the match.

 When he arrives at the club and says everyone hello, the glances his teammates give him just amplify the fear in his chest. Several of them ask him the dreaded question, to which his answer still hasn’t changed, and Shinsuke points out how tired his voice sounds. He doesn’t have much to do but to admit he’s a little sick, ignoring the way his uniform is sticking to his skin and the way the world is starting to spin around him.

Even as he changes in the lockers, the feeling doesn’t go away. He can only pray nobody else notices the chills going down his body and the fact he looks like he’s already practiced – would he look into the mirror for more than necessary when refreshing his face in an attempt to make the fever vanish from his cheeks, he’d notice the fatigue isn’t just visible on his body.

He puts away his mask inside his bag and exits the changing room’s bathroom, intending on practicing like everyone else and to stay home tomorrow. (Wait, that’d worry them, wouldn’t it? Ha, he’s in quite the predicament, isn’t he?).

 Running around is difficult when his throat is pratically begging him to stop and so is doing literally anything on the field. The voices around him are floating, his surroundings keep blurring on and off, the coughing fits are tearing his throat apart. Even after the warmups, he can feel Trainer Kidou’s heavy glance on his shoulders and his teammate’s doubts all around him like a collar that’s buttoned-up too tightly around his neck.

Still, he tries to convince himself it’ll all be fine in the end. It’s just a practice session and he’s sure his teammates have practiced through worse pains than his throat bothering him to no end. The only thing that makes him weaver in his convictions is the way the words he tries to say tend to break apart by the end, his voice suddenly shifting in tones as if someone played nonsensically on his vocal cords (the imagery makes him squeamish, so he tries to focus back onto practice, no matter how much the day has exhausted him and how difficult it is to keep up his optimism).

 His bad day clearly doesn’t end there either as, for the first time in a while, someone stops Extend Zone before it can even reach the goal, without even responding with a technique of their own. He watches the purple ball lose its firepower in the hands of his teammate and falls to his knees, the artificial grace rubbing against them, as he loses control over his own body.

He doesn’t even do it on purpose: it’s merely because his legs give in from the shock and the sudden wave of exhaustion. He’d be glad to rise back to his feet too, especially considering he hears and sees everyone running to where he is, saying either of his names in worried voices; but he’s trapped in a coughing fit, yet again, and this one only ends with him almost choking.

 The first to reach him is the one who stopped Extend Zone: Kirino, who was merely on the trajectory of the technique because he miscalculated where he was on the field and where the goal was compared to his position. He kneels to his level, putting his hand on his shoulders, only to grip on his shirt in an attempt not to take them off.

“Coach,” Kirino says with a sense of urgency in his voice he can still sense despite his weakened state, “he’s burning up!”

 As if teleporting there, Coach Endou takes only seconds before arriving to them, running faster than they’ve ever seen him do. From what Hikaru can understand through the water he feels submerged in, the coach is pushing the others away to let him breathe, before doing like Kirino did earlier and crouching so he can see the man’s face. He’s frowning and there’s little Hikaru can do about it, as much as it pains him to see that expression, especially knowing it must be his fault’s.

The back of a strong hand lands on his forehead, cool to the touch, and he’s tempted to give into the temptation of just leaning into it and let himself be carried away; but he knows he shouldn’t do that and only appreciates the coldness in silence, like a good child.

 “I’m…” He tries to reply, pushing on his arms after yet another coughing fit. “Fi…”

His voice breaks again, deforming into that of a person he doesn’t know who’d switch between ranges, his words never finishing before he coughs again.

“You’re not,” Coach Endou comments matter-of-factly, uncharacteristically unenthusiastic, “and that’s okay, Hikaru.”

He finally rises his head, only to realize his coach has been smiling to him all along. That last bit of coughing has left him with tears in his eyes so his vision is a little blurry, but he can sense it: Coach Endou is smiling.

“You’re…” No matter what he does, his voice sounds broken. “You’re sure…?”

“I’m sure.”

 Tenma gets closer.

“Why didn’t you tell us, Hikaru?” He asks, sounding strangely quieter than he usually does. “Nobody would have held it against you, right guys?”

From what he can hear, most of the team says yes to the question.

“See?” Ah, Tenma’s smiling, that’s good. “You’ve got nothing to worry about!”

“So, why didn’t you tell us?” Shindou, who appears from behind Kirino, asks.

“I’m not sure if he has the voice remaining to tell us,” the latter replies. “Better ask him when he’ll be better, if you ask me.”

“That’s true. We’ll wait until you get better.”

 Coach Endou gives him a hand, so Hikaru takes it, almost falls from a sudden lack of balance. His senses are all mudded, but he can feel the warmth of the team’s appreciation on him, and that’s more than enough for now, he thinks.

Too bad he can’t tell them how thankful he is, at the moment.

[mysteriouslyzealouspandalov-blog]

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

New Post has been published on https://relationshipguideto.com/must-see/relationship-myths-debunked-by-a-professional-to-calm-your-woes/

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

Unless you met your significant other in high school, dating is really hard and anxiety-inducing for, like, every moment until you are officially in a relationship (and then that’s where the real work starts). Even God’s gift to humanity, Serena van der Woodsen, struggled on the dating scene, which is truly troubling for normal people. Yes, I am aware that SVDW is a fictional character, but even Blake Lively had to swim through a sea of Kelly Blatz’s and Penn Badgley’s before finding Ryan Reynolds. I guess the only upside to having no idea what is happening in my love life is that I have at least one thing in common with Blake Lively—kind of. Don’t ruin this for me.

So, I met someone a little over a month ago who checks all of my boxes, and even though my therapist and Hannah Montana both say nobody’s perfect, this guy is pretty damn close. Except for one thing: We don’t hang out more than like, once a week, which I didn’t realize was an issue until one of my happily married friends forced her unsolicited opinion on me shared her concerns with me. Since then, I have not been able to stop thinking about where this relationship (can I even call it that?) is heading, if anywhere. Have I been so burned by former boyfriends that my bar is set unreasonably low, or am I so smitten that I can’t see an obvious red flag? So like any neurotic New Yorker, I took to the experts and consulted Dr. Jenny Taitz, a clinical psychologist and author of How To Be Single and Happy, to make me feel better and debunk a few common misconceptions about dating.  

If You Aren’t Hanging Out Multiple Times A Week Within The First Month, You’re Doomed

So this is obviously what initiated my downward spiral line of questioning, and I was very eager to hear a professional’s opinion on the matter. Here’s what Dr. Taitz had to say: “It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality. If you’re seeing each other once a week and spending four or five hours on a Saturday actually talking about real things, rather than meeting up at like, midnight, it’s not a bad sign.” And, as much as I hate to admit that anyone aside from myself is right, she has a point. For instance, I used hang out with my FWB like three nights a week, which was both great and horrible. It was nice because we got to see a lot of each other, which is more than I can say about the current guy I’m seeing, but all FWB and I did together was the old school definition of Netflix and Chill and then the ~relationship~ just kind of shriveled up and died. Welp.

So this horrendous experience is shedding some light on my current situation: I have to (slightly) rely on positive and negative indicators for answers about his feelings for me or where he sees us going. As cliche as it is to admit, trusting your gut is usually the right thing to do, and I def knew that FWB wasn’t going to pan out. If he’s showing you zero signs of wanting to be your boyfriend at some point in the future, chances are, he won’t be.

If You Can’t Sleep At His Apartment, You’re Not Comfortable With Him

If there is something more intimate than sleeping next to someone, LMK. Honestly, I have been told I’m low-maintenance to sleep next to because I don’t really move or make sound other than quiet breathing, which is prob better than absolute silence (creepy). Anyway, even though I’m a pretty easy bedmate, I still get so insecure sleeping next to someone until I feel absolutely comfortable with him. For instance, Mr. Almost Perfect loves to snuggle, which is adorable and sweet, but after a few hours, half my body is numb and I need to switch positions, but I can’t because I don’t want to wake him up so I just lay there in agony waiting for him to roll over on his own. Look, I’ve had plenty of sleepovers with my girlfriends and if they unconsciously make their way onto my side, I have zero issue waking their asses up and delivering them back to their side. So why can’t I do that with a guy I’m seeing? Am I becoming a nice person who’s concerned about the wellbeing and restfulness of others? Doubtful, but Dr. Taitz says, “There are a lot of reasons why people can’t sleep. Sometimes people can’t sleep because they’re excited. It doesn’t necessarily have to do with physical or mental comfort.” As someone who can fall asleep literally anywhere, I was getting a little worried about what my restless nights in Bushwick (I know) might signal for my not-yet-relationship, but I feel a bit better now!

If You’re Affectionate Towards Each Other, The Relationship Is Just Physical

To clarify, I hate PDA more than I hate most things in this world. However, little things like holding my excessively clammy hand, putting your arm around me, or letting me have the first bite of whatever dessert we’re “sharing” make me happy. And in any given relationship, I am the affectionate one, which is totally fine with me, but Mr. Almost Perfect is also super warm and mushy, which is confusing to me! Is he being so touchy and sweet in response to me acting that way or is he just like that? Dr. Taitz says, “Touching is a good example of showing closeness, and being affectionate through touch is never a bad thing.” Generally, trust your gut. If it feels sweet and genuine, it probably is. Plus, there’s generally no sh*tty and disappointing meaning to an innocent hand hold.

However, if his hand always manages to find its way to your butt, well, hopefully you know what that means. Lastly, Dr. Taitz admits, “It’s really fascinating how our mind tries to undermine our joy and replace closeness with worry.” That’s literally what I am doing right now. Lastly, “You should ask yourself what you have in common besides the physical touch, because I’m sure if you want to touch someone, there’s something that’s attracting you well beyond the physical.” There is, there def is.

If You Don’t Like His Friends, You Eventually Won’t Like Him

Dr. Taitz says, “It’s safe to say he’s probably not a clone of his friends. We need to be okay with the element of uncertainty and not knowing everything we would want to know right away.” Hopefully, I’ll find out soon what the deal with his friends is, but people’s friends are not always a mirror reflection of who they are. I have a friend who knows more about what’s happening in Washington than Trump does, which honestly isn’t saying much, but he likes to bring politics into every conversation he has and it’s as annoying as it seems, if not more so. I have another friend who is like, an actual drama magnet, and seeing her is more exhausting than a SoulCycle class on a Sunday morning. But I love them and, needless to say, they aren’t shedding any negative light on my personality or self because they are the way they are, but more importantly, I am not them. Yes, sometimes “you are the company you keep” can ring true, but other times it just doesn’t—you can’t tell without getting to know the person.

If You Aren’t Texting All Day Every Day, The Communication Needs Work

Nothing bugs me more than when someone texts me “Hey, what’s up?” Like, are we supposed to have a full-fledged convo via text right now? The only reasons I text someone are when something very specific to that person just happened or if we making plans. Mr. Almost Perfect is the same way, so when we aren’t together, we aren’t really texting, like, ever. Every now and then we will say something stupid to check in and make sure the other is still alive, but we are definitely not those people who are constantly, like, tagging each other in vague memes and saying goodnight with kissy face emojis on the daily. No judgment if that’s your vibe, but gross. I kind of like it this way because I will never read into a text or lack thereof. Do you know how stressed out I used to get trying to decipher the convoluted and hidden messages buried in texts of past boyfriends? For instance, I texted a guy I had been seeing for a few weeks, “Let’s do something tonight” and he responded with “Do you want to?” Like, yes?? What kind of answer is that?! So the lack of constant texting actually takes a massive headache off the table. The only reason I am even discussing this is because after a dinner with a friend, she was shook that my boo thang didn’t call or text during the entire 75 minutes of dinner. I was not shook at all because I’ve had English Lit classes longer than that, but she thought it was so weird that she warned me to “watch out for this one.” Okay, mom, I shall. But Dr. Taitz says, “I highly recommend against texting all day because it can definitely create false feelings and a false sense of intimacy. If you are confident that when you see each other you will talk and catch up, you don’t need to have that insecure attachment to texting.” Brilliant.

The bottom line is that only you and the other person in the relationship are the ones who can take the temperature of the situation. So even if your friends have been in really similar situations, your friends and their SOs aren’t you and yours, so you can’t really listen to them. Of course, some things can seem like a red flag and others a green light, which makes the situation slightly easier to navigate, but until the “what are we?” conversation is had, the only thing we can do is know what we know, which is usually not enough to make any accurate predictions about where it’s going and what it all means.

Images: Unsplash; Giphy (3)

Read more: https://www.betches.com

[relationshipadviser-blog]

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

New Post has been published on https://relationshipqia.com/must-see/relationship-myths-debunked-by-a-professional-to-calm-your-woes/

Relationship Myths Debunked by a professional to calm your woes

Unless you met your significant other in high school, dating is really hard and anxiety-inducing for, like, every moment until you are officially in a relationship (and then that’s where the real work starts). Even God’s gift to humanity, Serena van der Woodsen, struggled on the dating scene, which is truly troubling for normal people. Yes, I am aware that SVDW is a fictional character, but even Blake Lively had to swim through a sea of Kelly Blatz’s and Penn Badgley’s before finding Ryan Reynolds. I guess the only upside to having no idea what is happening in my love life is that I have at least one thing in common with Blake Lively—kind of. Don’t ruin this for me.

So, I met someone a little over a month ago who checks all of my boxes, and even though my therapist and Hannah Montana both say nobody’s perfect, this guy is pretty damn close. Except for one thing: We don’t hang out more than like, once a week, which I didn’t realize was an issue until one of my happily married friends forced her unsolicited opinion on me shared her concerns with me. Since then, I have not been able to stop thinking about where this relationship (can I even call it that?) is heading, if anywhere. Have I been so burned by former boyfriends that my bar is set unreasonably low, or am I so smitten that I can’t see an obvious red flag? So like any neurotic New Yorker, I took to the experts and consulted Dr. Jenny Taitz, a clinical psychologist and author of How To Be Single and Happy, to make me feel better and debunk a few common misconceptions about dating.  

If You Aren’t Hanging Out Multiple Times A Week Within The First Month, You’re Doomed

So this is obviously what initiated my downward spiral line of questioning, and I was very eager to hear a professional’s opinion on the matter. Here’s what Dr. Taitz had to say: “It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality. If you’re seeing each other once a week and spending four or five hours on a Saturday actually talking about real things, rather than meeting up at like, midnight, it’s not a bad sign.” And, as much as I hate to admit that anyone aside from myself is right, she has a point. For instance, I used hang out with my FWB like three nights a week, which was both great and horrible. It was nice because we got to see a lot of each other, which is more than I can say about the current guy I’m seeing, but all FWB and I did together was the old school definition of Netflix and Chill and then the ~relationship~ just kind of shriveled up and died. Welp.

So this horrendous experience is shedding some light on my current situation: I have to (slightly) rely on positive and negative indicators for answers about his feelings for me or where he sees us going. As cliche as it is to admit, trusting your gut is usually the right thing to do, and I def knew that FWB wasn’t going to pan out. If he’s showing you zero signs of wanting to be your boyfriend at some point in the future, chances are, he won’t be.

If You Can’t Sleep At His Apartment, You’re Not Comfortable With Him

If there is something more intimate than sleeping next to someone, LMK. Honestly, I have been told I’m low-maintenance to sleep next to because I don’t really move or make sound other than quiet breathing, which is prob better than absolute silence (creepy). Anyway, even though I’m a pretty easy bedmate, I still get so insecure sleeping next to someone until I feel absolutely comfortable with him. For instance, Mr. Almost Perfect loves to snuggle, which is adorable and sweet, but after a few hours, half my body is numb and I need to switch positions, but I can’t because I don’t want to wake him up so I just lay there in agony waiting for him to roll over on his own. Look, I’ve had plenty of sleepovers with my girlfriends and if they unconsciously make their way onto my side, I have zero issue waking their asses up and delivering them back to their side. So why can’t I do that with a guy I’m seeing? Am I becoming a nice person who’s concerned about the wellbeing and restfulness of others? Doubtful, but Dr. Taitz says, “There are a lot of reasons why people can’t sleep. Sometimes people can’t sleep because they’re excited. It doesn’t necessarily have to do with physical or mental comfort.” As someone who can fall asleep literally anywhere, I was getting a little worried about what my restless nights in Bushwick (I know) might signal for my not-yet-relationship, but I feel a bit better now!

If You’re Affectionate Towards Each Other, The Relationship Is Just Physical

To clarify, I hate PDA more than I hate most things in this world. However, little things like holding my excessively clammy hand, putting your arm around me, or letting me have the first bite of whatever dessert we’re “sharing” make me happy. And in any given relationship, I am the affectionate one, which is totally fine with me, but Mr. Almost Perfect is also super warm and mushy, which is confusing to me! Is he being so touchy and sweet in response to me acting that way or is he just like that? Dr. Taitz says, “Touching is a good example of showing closeness, and being affectionate through touch is never a bad thing.” Generally, trust your gut. If it feels sweet and genuine, it probably is. Plus, there’s generally no sh*tty and disappointing meaning to an innocent hand hold.

However, if his hand always manages to find its way to your butt, well, hopefully you know what that means. Lastly, Dr. Taitz admits, “It’s really fascinating how our mind tries to undermine our joy and replace closeness with worry.” That’s literally what I am doing right now. Lastly, “You should ask yourself what you have in common besides the physical touch, because I’m sure if you want to touch someone, there’s something that’s attracting you well beyond the physical.” There is, there def is.

If You Don’t Like His Friends, You Eventually Won’t Like Him

Dr. Taitz says, “It’s safe to say he’s probably not a clone of his friends. We need to be okay with the element of uncertainty and not knowing everything we would want to know right away.” Hopefully, I’ll find out soon what the deal with his friends is, but people’s friends are not always a mirror reflection of who they are. I have a friend who knows more about what’s happening in Washington than Trump does, which honestly isn’t saying much, but he likes to bring politics into every conversation he has and it’s as annoying as it seems, if not more so. I have another friend who is like, an actual drama magnet, and seeing her is more exhausting than a SoulCycle class on a Sunday morning. But I love them and, needless to say, they aren’t shedding any negative light on my personality or self because they are the way they are, but more importantly, I am not them. Yes, sometimes “you are the company you keep” can ring true, but other times it just doesn’t—you can’t tell without getting to know the person.

If You Aren’t Texting All Day Every Day, The Communication Needs Work

Nothing bugs me more than when someone texts me “Hey, what’s up?” Like, are we supposed to have a full-fledged convo via text right now? The only reasons I text someone are when something very specific to that person just happened or if we making plans. Mr. Almost Perfect is the same way, so when we aren’t together, we aren’t really texting, like, ever. Every now and then we will say something stupid to check in and make sure the other is still alive, but we are definitely not those people who are constantly, like, tagging each other in vague memes and saying goodnight with kissy face emojis on the daily. No judgment if that’s your vibe, but gross. I kind of like it this way because I will never read into a text or lack thereof. Do you know how stressed out I used to get trying to decipher the convoluted and hidden messages buried in texts of past boyfriends? For instance, I texted a guy I had been seeing for a few weeks, “Let’s do something tonight” and he responded with “Do you want to?” Like, yes?? What kind of answer is that?! So the lack of constant texting actually takes a massive headache off the table. The only reason I am even discussing this is because after a dinner with a friend, she was shook that my boo thang didn’t call or text during the entire 75 minutes of dinner. I was not shook at all because I’ve had English Lit classes longer than that, but she thought it was so weird that she warned me to “watch out for this one.” Okay, mom, I shall. But Dr. Taitz says, “I highly recommend against texting all day because it can definitely create false feelings and a false sense of intimacy. If you are confident that when you see each other you will talk and catch up, you don’t need to have that insecure attachment to texting.” Brilliant.

The bottom line is that only you and the other person in the relationship are the ones who can take the temperature of the situation. So even if your friends have been in really similar situations, your friends and their SOs aren’t you and yours, so you can’t really listen to them. Of course, some things can seem like a red flag and others a green light, which makes the situation slightly easier to navigate, but until the “what are we?” conversation is had, the only thing we can do is know what we know, which is usually not enough to make any accurate predictions about where it’s going and what it all means.

Images: Unsplash; Giphy (3)

Read more: https://www.betches.com

[toyswithtude]

I originally wrote this review when these Dawn of Justice figures were first released, so if some of this seems disjointed, that’s my excuse. Even as I start this retrospect, I can hear the chants of “But it’s Mafex, what do you expect?” I have probably flip flopped on my opinion regarding the other two figures released from this line so far (Batman and Superman) a lot. On one hand, the Batman is lacking in flexibility, while Superman practically flops around like a marionette. “Their quality control is lacking!”

Maybe, but then I also look at the figures from a pure aesthetic standpoint, and despite Mafex having no idea what color the flesh is on an actual human, the figures are VERY nice.

Perhaps I am judging my Mafex figures and their articulation (or lack thereof) based on the same standards I hold my Figuarts figures. Ultimately, that isn’t fair, because they tend to cost anywhere from $30 more to double the cost of a Mafex for a web exclusive.

So no, a Mafex figure isn’t a Figuarts figure, but it also isn’t a Marvel Legend or a *gasp* Multiverse figure.

Here we are, with the brand spanking new (ok, not so much now) Mafex Armored Batman from Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice. The box is what we have come to expect from most companies these days. Clear plastic showing off the figure and accessories. Pictures of the figure all over the box in various poses and a lot of Japanese writing on it that could very well be insulting my family. I don’t know. I don’t speak Japanese (still) and I always assume the worst.

My first impression after taking him out of the box, was “wow.” This is just a gorgeous figure. The detail on the armor, the weathering, it just looks great.

Mmmmm Affleck butt…

The Accessories –

Not nearly as much as the non-armored version, but again, more than you would get with your average Legends figure. I believe that with the upcoming Mafex Knightmare Batman (this was back when we thought the Knightmare batman would be released within a reasonable time period), we will get a busted helmet and kryptonite spear for this figure and I’m pretty excited about both additional accessories (I was right to be excited, they are awesome). He has three sets of hands which consists of fists, open (or neutral) and a “holding” hand which holds his only other accessory, which comes to us in the form of the grappling hook he used during the fight with Big Blue. The detail on the hands and the grappling device is amazingly intricate. Take a look at the pics!

  The kryptonite staff and busted helmet sculpt included with the Knightmare Batman.

The Articulation –

If you have the Mafex Batman and Superman from DoJ, the articulation is very similar. If you don’t, you get roughly 20 points of articulation. Double jointed elbows and knees, wrist pivot and spin, ankle pivot, hips and torso, etc. Nothing unexpected. I’m always at odds with the multiple exposed pegs that allow this kind of movement but I’ve learned to overlook them. The hands can be tricky (like most imports, it seems) as it’s probably easy to snap off the peg when you’re swapping out hands. They (the pegs) tend to run away from you during the change-out.

The head has VERY minimal up and down range of motion, so don’t put your Supes too high up or ol’ Brucie boy will be looking at Clark’s feet.

Height-

The figure stands at roughly 6.3 inches tall and looks appropriate next to regular Batman and our angsty friend from Krypton. Here are a couple shots next to the Multiverse Carrie Kelley Robin, the Matty-Collector new 52 Batman as well as the new reissue Figuarts Iron Man mark 42, Black Widow and DC Icon Deadman. While the DC Icon line looks tiny next to Legends figures, I found they are really in scale with the Mafex line. All of this is, of course, relative. How my mind thinks this fictional character should look next to this other fictional character. That being said, I am a bit of a scale obsessed weenie so maybe you can use some of my OCD to help size up your display.

  Negatives –

The only real downside I could find is that the joints are really loose. Not as loose as Superman’s joints, and certainly nothing that prevented me from getting him into some cool poses, but I just wanted you to be aware of the issue if it’s a deal breaker for you. There are plenty of options to tighten those up if you use the Google. Again, only if that bothers you.

Conclusion –

This is a great figure. From a display point, the Mafex figures look really good. Let’s face it, I’m not a 12 year old anymore (granted, my girlfriend and kids would disagree, but they’re not the boss of me) so I don’t spend a lot of time “playing” with the figures. I do restage them quite often and honestly, I’ve had zero issues with any of them. Even the orangeish (is that a word? It is now…) flesh isn’t that noticeable when it’s sitting in a lit display case. I guess if I was the type of guy who spent days harassing Wendy’s Facebook page about their new fries, I’d probably dedicate blogs to how much the skin tone bothered me.

Wait, I did do that to Wendy’s Facebook page until they blocked me. In my defense, their new fries are not dissimilar to eating salted ear wax. Yet the skin tone isn’t a deal breaker for me. Maybe I’m growing up?

Said the guy writing action figure reviews.

But I digress, this figure looks like a work of art. I had initially bought the original three Multiverse figures from Dawn of Justice at Target, but took them back the next day as I didn’t see the point in having them AND the Mafex ones that I had already preordered. I’ve seen customizers make the Multiverse Armored Batman look great. I don’t have the time or inclination to do so but I admire their work. Even with that work, I imagine the joints are still limited and you get almost no accessories with them.

I also can’t justify doubling this price and getting the Mezco. Not that I don’t like the Mezco line, but this Mafex Bats does everything I want an action figure to do except light up and again, I can’t justify the cost for light up eyes in this instance.

If you were a fan of the movie, if you’re a fan of Bat-Fleck at all, if you just like the character, you need this figure. You can get him at the usual haunts:

Amazon

eBay

If you picked him up, what did you think? If you didn’t, what held you back?

One of the best parts of BvS:DoJ, in 1:12 scale! I originally wrote this review when these Dawn of Justice figures were first released, so if some of this seems disjointed, that's my excuse.

[roblnwheeler]

TBH and Rouge One

Returning from Rouge One I had a few thoughts I wanted to write down before they fluttered away (which they’re already starting to!). These were just my perceptions and options of the movie overall. I’m not well versed in Star Wars, and I’m certain that has had an effect on my experience, for better or worse. I personally really loved this movie.

Here are some of my thoughts:

All the characters die and I think its Great

In fact, if they hadn’t died, I would’ve been disappointed. I’m not heartless, and I loved each of the characters to death (pun intended), but it made for the whole tone of the movie. (In general, I actually typically dislike character deaths but more on that later).

The movie and the franchise speaks to the symbolism idea that we as individuals are something a part of a bigger whole and that it is more important to us than ourselves. The rebels die for their cause because they believe in the greater idea of the mission and its importance. They themselves do not matter but what they chose to do with themselves does. If the main characters, particularly Jyn or Cassian had lived, it would’ve made for a much different tone. One that spoke to the idea that the characters themselves were more important than the thing they were accomplishing. 

Also, each death was so well handled and I didn’t really have any complaints (which if you know me I almost always have complaints when deaths are involved, they’re usually done so cheaply and unnecessarily). Each member of Rouge One gave their live respectfully and appropriately. Their deaths felt meaningful, not shoddy and done for dramatic effect. 

I honestly loved each and every death in it’s own right. They each fulfilled a purpose in the end. My favorite of the favorite death would perhaps be the last couple of significant deaths, Cassian, Jyn, and the random rebel.

The rebel who tries so desperately to escape the closed door but, when seeing Darth Vader mow down his fellow crewmen and knowing he’s also going to share their fate, chooses to pass off the information but it is so vital that it gets to the Alliance. There are a lot of World War references throughout Star Wars but this scene specifically reminded me of that emotional feeling, of one individual doing everything they can in their last moments to save something bigger than themselves. Doing what they can to save others they will never meet.

(Weirdly enough watching Rouge One to me felt a little like if one lived in the Star Wars universe and it was their version of watching a historical movie bringing an amazing wartime story to the big screen because we all knew coming into the movie theatre that the events in Rouge One have already happened. It was much more about the journey itself than the ending.)

Jyn and Cassian’s death.... It was incredibly well done in my opinion and I loved every cut scene of it.After sending out the message, Jyn helps Cassian to the beach to send their last moments alive somewhere pleasant. They can’t escape, there’s no way out of the situation and the ripple of the blast is swiftly coming down upon them, and they find it in themselves to accept that and to find comfort in a companion’s presence in their last moments because they’ve done what they needed to do. They knew coming into this mission they likely weren’t getting out alive and given the options, going this way is better than they could’ve hoped for.

(Also on a small note, the white coat commander [Idk his name] being on the planet and seeing his creation rise in the sky to end his life. That was some poetry right there. He never honestly thought of just what his weapon would be like if he was on the other end and you see, that now he’s about to experience the full spectrum of the Death Star and all it’s “beauty”.)

The Romance, or lack thereof

If I rant to you irl, you probably already know but to put it mildly, I just don’t have much time for romance in movies; particularly action movies. I always feel they they are forced, crammed in too tightly, and poorly written to the point that they completely miss the goal they were trying to achieve leaving no one rooting for the couple or even the characters.

Rouge One didn’t do that, and dear lordie did I love it. There were zero outright romance plots (minus Jyn’s parents and not even them really), and the undertones were subtle and perfect. All these characters are in the middle of warzones and high risk, covert operations and don’t have time for any budding romances and surprisingly; the writers accepted and worked with that.

Throughout the entire movie you see these people slowly learning to trust and appreciate each other, working together toward their mutual goal and accepting the fate they have chosen before them. But there is not one kiss or awkward sex scene throughout.

Instead, the audience receive several subtle, non-disruptive moments between characters that leave much up to interpretation because, much like the character’s, the plot doesn’t have time to concern itself with the foolishness of romance. That would’ve been something to deal with outside of this time period in their lives.

With Chirrut and Malbus, you see a long standing companionship from the start. These two have obviously known each other a long time and have many shared moments together. They fight, discuss, and jest well together. Still, their relationship remains ambiguous throughout (there is a particularly adorable scene in which Chirrut says he’ll be safe because he’ll have Malbus with him-- a giant who constantly complains about saving the guardian despite his impressive fighting skills). Malbus, never one who is seen directly believing in the Force, and often joking about Chirrut’s fate, never attempts to dissuade him and during their final moments together he prays for Chirrut’s sake out of the respect for the connection they share. He is distraught to see Chirrut die and in his own final moments, Malbus finds comfort in looking upon Chirrut one last time.

Jyn and Cassian, the two protagonists, were obvious and almost dreaded choices for a romance in the movie. Surprisingly, there isn’t really any romantic or sexual tension between the two throughout almost the entire movie. It isn’t until their last few moments that the audience receive the potential undertones, (which are never fully brought up). Instead of having them share a kiss during their final moments, they hold hands and hold each other close, facing their impending deaths together using each others strength. For me personally, I don’t think that Jyn or Cassian even ever really saw themselves as friends but they came to share a great mutual respect and admiration for one and other in the end.

Both of these relationships presented the subtle possibility for more than a friendship but also allowed the viewer to accept their relationship as only a friendship if they wished.

[Only in a little part of my head did I imagine all the characters were asexual and it was also beautiful but probably complete nonsense. Still  so Beautiful though to watch them from that perspective none the less.]

By doing things the way they did, it actually had me appreciating the potential couples in ways I never can when couples are outwardly done in these kinds of films.

Diversity and Accents

Diversity in casting today is something I’m rather passionate about. I think it’s incredibly important and needed to be telling a competent and fully fleshed out story of the human people and I think we’ve fallen short in this department more often than we’d like to think in recent years, filling the potential for good storytelling with the poor substitute of diverse casting for the sake of having it. A character of a specific gender/race/religion/orientation/etc, should not exist simply to be that one specific quality. Humans are diverse and complex in their existence and successful characters should reflect that. [I’m rambling now... Back to Rouge One points...]

Diversity in this movie... I loved it. In the beginning I had some disappointing doubts about the diversity of the film watching the opening scenes but when we got into it, the movie really ended up impressing me.

The majority of the main characters came from racially different backgrounds and their accents, their accents. Not being entirely familiar with SW universe and such I know they have their own languages (which was cool to see) but also each of the characters spoke with their own distinctive accents, suggesting a truly diverse and multicultural upbringing between all of them. Even Jyn’s accent is not distinctively American (which to me personally seemed to be many of the older SWs characters [I could be wrong here]). It’s not a bad thing to have a American accents and such, but I think it’s important to have more than just that one perspective in a movie like SW because the world created includes it because you are talking about people living on so many different worlds with different races... just think of all the differences in human culture within our own one little Earth.

Anywho, the accents really brought something to each of the characters and gave them a special kind of identity that often isn’t seen in popular franchised movies.

So yes, it was great. And I enjoyed it greatly.

Cassian should have shot Him

There were only about two things in the movie that I thought were a little cliche but with all the other amazing things in the movie (and with how small they were), I really didn’t mind.

During the scene where Cassian was looking through he sniper scope...It was here that, despite his dilemma over shooting Jyn’s father, Cassian totally should’ve shot Mr. White Coat Commander dude. 1) meta-speaking, it would’ve saved them a ton of time down the road a little bit of hurt, and 2) Cassian being a rebel member should’ve known this guy was a high ranking Empire member and should’ve taken him out on site for the sake of the alliance. it would’ve been a good hit to the Empire.

The other thing was actually a split up of two things relating to Galen Erso. 1) he’s wife’s death was a little cheesy, just having her die at the beginning and him holding her body. and 2) him dying as soon as he reunites with his daughter. Both of these things were pretty small to the overall point of his character and the movie and with everything else going on (so much amazing plot, characterization, etc.), it’s honestly easy to give these few little things a pass.

Starship battles always make me cry

Seriously though, every fantasy movie I watch with star fighters blowing up and random big battle scenes make me getting teary-eyed and I’m not a particularly big crier. It’s just, I don’t see ships blowing up, I see people with families exploding. And I see their families being contacted later on to inform them of the tragedy. [You should’ve seen me in GOTG when the Nova core all die... so many silent movie theatre tears]

Star Wars may be all about fighting got a bigger cause/idea but I also feel like there were men stationed at that Comm tower (Ik there were clones [they’re another deal] and stuff but here I especially mean the regular blokes) whose partners told them them if they were going to be joining the Empire’s Militia, they’d have to find a station somewhere out of harm’s way where they won’t get hurt.

Now imagine the pain of losing the loved one, added to the fact that you thought they had chosen a relatively safe planet to work on.

Rouge One is Basically a fantastic fanfic

What I mean here, is that we already have the setup of Star Wars in canon, and we know what’s already happened to original main characters. Rouge One is like a fanfic that creates other characters within the same world, existing at the same time, and we see the world from their perspective and from their story.

It’s so great to me that this exists and is done so well, especially with the age difference in the movies and ugh, just so good. I’ve died because of fanfics that worked like this.

In Conclusion...

Basically, in short, Rouge One is Just Brilliant.

In my opinion, it has just so much to offer people, both those who do an don’t know the franchise well.

I was rather neutral going into the film but man, it just blew all my expectations and presumptions out of the water. In the best way possible.

The biggest things I usually have problems with in modern cinema, unnecessary/cheap death scenes and romance were both handled practically flawlessly.

So much heart was put into this and it shows.

It renews and reinvigorates my standards and hopes for the future of cinematic film.

[Also, jokingly I just kept thinking how much differently this whole movie could’ve gone with Star Trek beaming tech xD]

I highly recommend seeing this, if you haven’t already. You won’t be disappointed (I don’t think)!