#i honestly do not ever think i've had a positive onboarding experience

[whentherewerebicycles]

question: when you're starting a new job, what do you most want out of your first week of onboarding? what's most helpful for you to know/understand upfront? also... what's not helpful? tell me your onboarding nightmare stories too lol

[walsiegirl]

You don't have to answer this question if you don't want to, but it's been bothering my mind quite a bit lately - how did you come to your conclusion in believing Geoffrey to be innocent in his case? I'm not judging or hating, I'm just curious. This is all coming from a fan new to him and his work, who really admires him but is feeling unsure. Again, you don't have to answer if you're not comfortable. I've looked at both sides and I'm just very, very confused as to what the truth really is, so I figured getting an older fan's perspective would help me understand anything I might be missing. Thank you in advance.🙏

Hi Anon! Sorry it took me a while to get back to you, I’ve been away and stuff.

This is a tough one and there honestly isn’t a right or wrong answer; it’s absolutely fine to be unsure and I cannot say one hundred percent he is innocent, nor can I say he is guilty. The way the case was initially reported was unfair to both parties, and they both went through essentially a trial by media, with others jumping in either with their own accusations or opinions, before anything really came to court. From a legal perspective, yes Geoffrey has won his case against the newspaper as there was, to over simplify it, little evidence to the contrary, which was a relief for those of us who have always admired him. But does that mean he hasn’t done anything wrong at all? It’s truly impossible to say.

When I very first heard about the allegations, I was confused, devastated and I wondered if I had got him completely wrong from the start. It’s taken time, reflection, and coming to terms with the fact that even people one admires may fuck up some times (some bigger than others) to help me feel, if not sure about things, then at least able to come to terms with it all to a degree. So straight off, I’m sorry I can’t give you a definitive answer, but I can ramble around the points that are central to the reason I still feel able to enjoy his work and the memories he gave me.

Firstly, I think Geoffrey Rush has enough integrity as a person to own up if he’s fucked up. Again, I’m going on my gut, it’s fine to disagree with me and people will. When presented with the allegations, he denied them, but he also stepped down from any positions of responsibility he felt he should not hold whilst being under scrutiny, and also apologised to former co-stars if he had made them feel uncomfortable with his work methodology. That isn’t him being silent and not acknowledging the problem, it’s taking a stand to start to work through it without being arrogant enough to go on as normal. It’s about starting a discourse.

Rolling on from that, I think the “making co-stars feel uncomfortable/sexually harassing co-stars” is probably the area of contention. I don’t personally feel or believe that Geoff would intentionally go out of his way to demean, oppress or harass people - again I am open to being proved wrong, this is just gut feeling and intuition - but Geoffrey is a naturally cheeky, playful, possibly even controversial character who I could easily see pushing boundaries in professional spheres - perhaps being overly extravagant, overly touchy-feely, overly jokey. This could easily make people feel uncomfortable and harassed. I think sometimes it can be too easy when you’re successful to become complacent and forget that not everyone is onboard with your ways of doing things and ways of being, with your self confidence and ego. A lot of people, myself included, are very good at being polite and tolerating things they find uncomfortable because they’re too worried/scared/tolerant to say otherwise. If you’re faced with an A-list actor who has a lot of clout, then by all means you may feel unable to speak up about feeling uncomfortable or not enjoying the way they treat you or work with you. It’s like being faced with the person at work who has been established at your company for a long time and is being overly familiar with you - do you dare tell the boss their favourite is too much for you? Probably not, you want to keep your job. And this kind of power imbalance may be where the issue lies.

So you are saying the allegations are all true? you’re probably asking now. No but I can easily see where there are lots of grey areas in this debacle rather than two black and white possibilities of guilty and not. Things may have been taken out of context or blown out of proportion - or not, who knows? When you’re acting and in close bodily contact with other people, and in theatre/film/tv this is a constant, there is a high risk you might touch people inappropriately. Was there true harassment in this instance, or were actions misjudged? Were comments said in jest, in humour, in affection misconstrued as creepy and inappropriate, or was that their real intent? When you only have two contrasting views, it’s impossible to know the truth. Also everything an individual experiences is relative - what one person may feel is harassment, the next may think is a funny joke or not even notice. This is where consent and communication come in - it’s important people, particularly those in positions of “power”, check in on their other halves/colleagues/co-stars once in a while to make sure everything is ok. If there isn’t trust and communication, then you end up with dumpster fires like this.

So what else can I ramble about? 

People fuck up. All the time. The difference with being accused of fucking up when you’re an A-list Oscar winner is that the whole world will know about it and lynch you for it, regardless of your guilt, and the internet is very good for spreading information quickly, both truth and lies and everything in between. Though it is fine to hold people to account and question accusations, it’s worth remembering that we all have fucked up in our lives; not all to the same degree, and some things it is utterly fine to not to forgive someone for, but I think one of the reasons I came around about things was that I can think of a few occasions in my life where I have royally fucked up, and if I had been famous I would not have lived it down. As I’m not famous though, the fuck-ups were resolved to a greater or lesser degree and now are mostly forgotten - except by me who can never forgive myself and will think about it until I die. I guess I just realised that I cannot judge because I have been a dick in my time, too. It’s not an excuse, I’m not trying to say that fuck ups are excusable if they have happened, but again there has to be a point where we move on or else we just get stuck feeling suicidal and not being able to recover. The important thing is to make amends and face your mistakes if they have been made. Can we let celebrities fuck up and come back? Depends on the fuck up of course, and sometimes it may be they lose their liberties, they need to regain trust, but sometimes there can be rehabilitation and success again - like Robert Downey Jr.

And though positive past conduct does not mean a person will never do or hasn’t done wrong, a lot of people who have worked with Geoff either as a co-star, or have directed him, etc, have voiced their support for him and enjoyed working with him. On a personal note, I will always have ridiculously positive memories of meeting him and writing to him. It’s a totally different kettle of fish to working professionally with him, of course, but I can’t forget that during the 2000s he used to like to keep a distant eye on the discourse between his fans online; he liked to know if his fans would be at such-and-such an event, and he even brought me a promo book about The Golden Age as a thank you when I dragged my arse down to Norfolk in the UK to see him at an event in 2007; he often felt more friend than celebrity to us. He was polite and curious, asked little questions like what you studied at university, what dog you had, what your username meant. He was exceptionally trusting of us, too.  And I just remember how chill he could be - I remember him texting his wife when a group of us met him in NY after his play there, or he’d step out for a smoke, and you’re like that’s a normal person, he’s checking in with his fam, doing his own thing, but he’s still got time for us. He was always a down to earth, friendly guy, beyond generous with his time and we all as a fan community felt appreciated by him. It was beyond cool. And I can’t forget that kindness, the fact he made me feel that I mattered. His benevolence has naturally garnered much loyalty in me.

And finally I also ask myself, if this was a family member, or a close friend, would I abandon them in bad weather? And the answer is no. Even if they fucked up badly, you help family and friends get through things, you help them rehabilitate, you support them making amends, and support them making reparations to anyone who has been hurt or wronged if need be. When I have fucked up, I haven’t been abandoned; yes reprimanded, yes cowed, but I’ve been given the opportunity to make amends and bounce back.

So long answer is, there is no answer. I have never affirmed or denied his innocence or guilt because I can’t. It has to come down to gut feeling in the end and trying to weigh up the mass of information and misinformation. It’s about invading the professional and private lives of people we probably have no business looking into. It’s about understanding that celebrities are just people, and they can potentially fuck up as badly as we do, but they may also be innocent of accusations like we can be too. It’s accepting that we can’t know any truths unless solid evidence is presented either way. So at present, I will continue to enjoy his films, his tv shows, his legacy, and appreciate everything he ever did for me either directly, or indirectly through his work. But I am also open-minded enough that if any hard evidence ever presented itself to the contrary, there may come a day I need to reappraise my position. But hopefully he is true to his word and to his success in winning his case, and he can work toward recovery and potentially even acting again, though the blow has been great, both to him and his accuser. He may never work again. My greatest fear is that if he is genuinely completely innocent of everything, then he has had the greatest joy in his life taken from him. I try not to dwell on that too much.

I hope that diatribe helps. It’s the elephant in the room that is hard to acknowledge but no one can tell you how to feel about it. It has to come from your own heart and soul. I also appreciate there are many other elements to consider but I can’t possibly cover all bases. It’s probably worth saying that I have been a victim of being groomed by a man so I understand the importance of women or vulnerable peoples having a voice, but that doesn’t necessarily mean every accusation against men is true, either.