#i havent played om in so long this is probably so ooc

[1-siracha]

obey me characters as the asian extended family stereotypes!! older brother edition

younger brothers / dateables / undateables

massive disclaimer: i am chinese-malaysian, and this is created solely off my own personal experiences and videos on the internet i have seen regarding this topic. these experiences and memories may not apply to you. this is also a joke, these are stereotypes and do not apply to all asian families or all ethnic families. also may be a little ooc since i havent played om! yet

☆

lucifer: the exemplary cousin

when i think of this guy, all i see is my younger cousin

absolute genius, gets high grades, focuses on school, DOES VIOLIN AND PIANO, wears the most concealing clothing, very mature

be prepared because your parents are about to relentlessly compare you to him

"aiyoh mc, why are you not like lucifer yet?! when he was your age, he was raising all his brothers on the streets after he fell from heaven, and what are you doing loh? smoking weed? doing cigarette? studying to be artist?"

during family gatherings, he is absolutely smothered in attention by all the aunties and uncles. most of the time sits with the parents instead of the kids and talks about whatever the fuck they talk about at the parents table

every other kid there gives him the death glare because these mfs KNOW he is loving the attention and the massive ego boost it gives him.

mammon: the disgrace

ok my southeast asian homies (and maybe south as well) we all know this mf

the main antagonist of the auntie gossip

often comes in the form of a sketchy uncle

has at LEAST two tattoos and one of them is probably a dragon (i am projecting my own disgrace uncle on to him so hard)

got in a lot of trouble for either scamming another relative out of money or gambling away their families money

smokes on the balcony during gatherings (if he's even allowed to go)

actually pretty nice and funny but nobody wants to be around him because hes a lowkey faliure. most of the older kids like hanging around him, but often dont stay around him too long as their parents are worried of his influence.

also he probably took up modeling which made the aunties hate him even more

eyes flick to mammon as he seats himself at the dining table, and he responds to them with a nervous smile. "mammon," one of the adults starts lowly, in a belittling tone that made him sick to his stomach. "didn't bring anything to the gathering, not even 古老肉..." they look at him before adding another taunt. "oh.. that's right.. you never learned mandarin, did you? nothing to contribute lah. always take, take, take with you. just LIKE WHAT YOU DID TO MY HUSBAND'S MONEY!!"

ruckus erupts as everyone on the adults table simultaneously starts yelling, as though the family tension built up over the past year head finally snapped.

shit.

Leviathan: the teenager

congratulations dude, you just got the most underrated type of asian at a family gathering.

doesn't get as much attention as lucifer due to being relatively mediocre and not as talented as him, but will occasionally his parents will flex his coding skills or an award he got at school.

doesnt really talk due to not much people at the family gathering being his age group, so he mostly sits in a very solitary corner of the kids table on an uncomfortably small plastic chair and plays games to pass the time.

SPEAKING OF GAMES

the moment the asian parents kick the kids off to the nintendo switch or wii u so they can freely argue about politics or whatever (im not sure im still stuck at the kids table 😭), this man completely shifts.

beats everyone MULTIPLE TIMES. makes them fucking bawl. oh my gosh its actually so funny.

the little kids hate him because he beats them so often in mario kart.

[devildom-darling]

‘’ you know me too well. ‘’

Pairing: Drunk!Lucifer x Gender Neutral MC

Genre: Spicy fluff

Synopsis: You knew Lucifer would be coming home drunk, you just didn’t think he’d come wandering into your room. Especially not with that look in his eyes. Inspired by the chat you get in game where Lucifer drunkenly tells you he loves you.

Word Count: 1605

Warnings for implied drunken sexual acts where one party is sober, and fade to black. 

You sat in your bedroom, eyes locked onto your D.D.D. Its light seems to almost taunt you as the device’s screen occasionally dims, only for your to tap it at the last second, not ready to stop looking just yet.

There stood those three damning words, condemning your soul to both heaven, hell, and everywhere in between. After all, he was clearly drunk. There was no way Lucifer could possibly have meant it.

No way that he could possibly have loved you.

You were a human. Diavolo’s prized exchange student. In other words, Lucifer’s personal responsibility. Sure, the demon had come to trust you, and you even considered him a close friend. But that was it. Lucifer was your friend, and nothing more than that.

Though, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t find him the least bit attractive. Underneath all his pride and standoffish nature, he could be rather endearing, dare you say even a bit charming. But unless Lucifer was as drunk as he was tonight all the time, he’d never reciprocate your feelings. At the end of the day, you were just human. A human that Lucifer wouldn’t dare to let himself fall for.

Still, looking at his words made you feel something. The drunken declaration of love made your heart beat just a bit faster and sent a soft pink flooding across your cheeks. It almost made you forget that the demon’s actions were the result of a drinking contest that ended quicker than it should have.

Your blissful suffering was cut short by a knock at your door. Assuming it was Mammon or one of the other residents of the House of Lamentation, you ignored the noise, figuring they’d let themselves in. It wasn’t until the knock grew louder that you begrudgingly rose from your bed and opened the door.

“Mammon, I told you I wasn’t going to help you w-” You freeze like a deer in headlights as you realized that was very much not Mammon. Lucifer stands before you with a light smirk on his face. His coat is barely hanging over one shoulder and his face is just the least bit flushed. Even his usually perfectly styled black hair sticks up in places, though you had to admit it looked good on him. 

“Hello to you too, MC.” Your eyes meet his, and you can tell that despite his sarcastic remark, he holds no real malice towards you. He walks into your room, both of you knowing he doesn’t need to ask.

“Lucifer, you’re drunk.” It isn’t a question. As he passed by you, you could smell the alcohol in his breath, knowing that any drink from the Devildom would knock a human like you unconscious with one sip.

A human like me. 

Lucifer laughs, nowhere near as condescending as usual, though he still holds that prideful glint in his eye. Only it’s mixed with something else, something you don’t quite understand. All you know is that it draws you in. Lucifer’s vice may be alcohol, but your vice is him.

He seats himself on your bed while removing his jacket and more or less tossing it onto your desk chair. He eyes your D.D.D and before you can stop him, he taps the dimmed screen, revealing his text message from nearly an hour ago. 

“So you’ve been thinking about me, hm?”

“No!” You pout. “...maybe. You should go to bed, you’re drunk,” you repeat, as though saying it again will remind him, despite the fact that he is well aware of his intoxicated state. 

“Demons are still aware when they’re drunk, MC. We have a far higher tolerance than you humans do.” It takes all your effort not to cringe when he says ‘humans’. You didn’t want to be reminded of what you were. Lucifer’s smirk grows a bit wider. “And I’ll stay as long as I like.” Knowing there’s no stopping him, and that you don’t even want him to leave, you sit beside him. He cups your chin and turns your head so that your eyes meet once more. 

“Lucifer-�� 

“You read the message, MC.” If you weren’t blushing before, you certainly are now. Your cheeks are redder than Lucifer’s shirt and feel as though they’re on fire. 

“And...?” He chuckles. 

“It seems spending so much time with my brothers has made you a bit dense.” You can’t help but laugh at that. It’s true, they’ve all influenced you since you arrived in the Devildom. Although, thoughts of your newfound friends are quickly replaced by memories and fantasies of Lucifer. He snaps his fingers in front of your face, bringing you out of your daydreams and replacing them with the real thing. 

“I don’t know what you’re getting at,” you insist, lightly pouting. You’ve found that frustration is a great way to mask your feelings. Lucifer sighs, in that tired, just barely scolding way that makes your heart skip a beat. His grasp on your chin tightens as he leans closer to you.

“I think you do.”

“You’re drunk, you didn’t mean-”

“I did.”

The playful pride in his gaze has been replaced with something new. Severity, desire, passion. You can feel yourself slipping, drowning in those dark ruby pools, and you have no desire to save yourself.

Lucifer laughs quietly. “What’s the matter, MC? At a loss for words?”

“Only for you...” you murmur. He grins.

“For me, hm?” Lucifer chuckles softly. “Good,” he says, in a low voice. “That’s exactly how I like it.” Slowly, his hands find their way down your neck. You’re so frail, so breakable compared to him, and you can’t help but tense. You see Lucifer pull away ever so slightly. “Is this alright?” 

“...yes. Yes, it is. Keep going.”

“Eager, are we?” You blush. Damn him. Damn him and his sexy voice and his sexy hands and his stupid, drunk, sexy face. His hands return to your neck, trailing sensually down before settling at your hips.

“Lucifer...” God, what can you even say to him? You aren’t sure, but he cuts you off anyways.

“You never responded.”

“Pardon?”

“To my message.” His eyes flitter to the D.D.D, forgotten on your pillow. Right, that. You chuckle softly.

“What can I say? You’re distracting me.”

“Then let’s not waste any more time.” Gently, Lucifer pushed you onto your back, your hair splayed out behind you on the silken sheets. Come to think of it, your sheets aren’t usually this soft and nice. They smell faintly of carnations, a scent Lucifer knows the both of you like. They’re washed, too. 

But you didn’t wash your sheets.

“You planned this,” you say, your voice just barely above a whisper. Pleasant shock creeps across your face, an expression that Lucifer takes delight in.

“You know me too well.” You smile. “It’s a shame that you caught on and ruined the surprise, though,” he scolds. There’s butterflies in your stomach, perhaps you ought to get scolded by Lucifer more often.

“I can make up for it.”

“And how will you do that?”

“Like this.”

Before he can react, you press your lips against Lucifer’s. Quickly easing into it, he reciprocates the kiss. At the very least, he wasn’t faking being drunk out of his mind, the taste of Devildom whiskey off his lips and the intoxicating scent of his cologne could probably knock you out. And yet, you’d never felt so awake. So alive. 

He pulls away from the kiss for a moment, a soft whine escaping your lips. Luckily, before you can protest, Lucifer moves his affections to your neck. 

“Not even going to give me a moment to catch my breath?” you tease.

“You should know better than to think I of all people would show you such mercy. Foolish human.” You roll your eyes at that. Did he just kill the mood? “You’re lucky, you know,” Lucifer remarks as he leaves a mark on your neck. Yeah, no, mood still intact, unlike your neck.

“Ah-! Why... why is that?”

“You’re human. So small in the universe, yet every taste, every touch so grand, unlike any other.” His fingers move to unbutton your shirt, fingers trailing over your bare skin. “I crave that feeling, that ecstasy, of something new.” He removes his own shirt, and by the time you blink, the rest of his clothes are off as well. You blink again, and so are yours. 

Lucifer’s eyes skirt over you with hunger, with pure desire. 

“I crave you, MC.” Your breath catches in your throat. Lucifer’s figure, a demon with the body and features of an angel, it’s a sight to behold. But more than that, his gaze. Never before has he seemed so raw, so carnal. In this moment, he isn’t a demon. He’s every bit as human as you are. 

“Then have me.”

You aren’t sure how long it goes on for, the experience leaving a pleasant fuzzy memory. Your body buzzes with sensual gratification, leaving the world perfectly and beautifully hazy. 

It isn’t until you both come down from your high that Lucifer begins to speak. This time, you cut him off. Wrapping a blanket around yourself, you reach for your D.D.D, earning an eyebrow raise from Lucifer. You type something out, and a soft ding comes from Lucifer’s forgotten coat. He walks over, giving you a rather... desirable view of his bare body. 

“It’s rude to stare, MC,” he chides. He pulls his D.D.D from the coat’s pocket, his eyes widening as he reads the notification. It doesn’t last long, though. He scoffs. “ ‘Love you too’,” he reads aloud. “Always one for dramatics, aren’t you, MC?”

“You know me too well.”