#i havent gotten around to working out exactly how everyone knows each other in a normal au but i just ran with it | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

blxetsi · 3 years ago

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armin arlert, mikasa ackerman, and eren jaeger polyamorous headcanons (modern au)

armin arlert x gn!reader, mikasa ackerman x gn!reader, eren jaeger x gn!reader, mikasa x armin x eren x gn!reader

warnings: uhh fluff, this is very long, reader has a gf b4 getting w ema,

this is like my first post since feb that isnt a request 😍😍😍 how did i pull this out of my ass

- obv eren, mikasa, and armin have been besties since childhood so its no wonder they all got together first 🤩🙏

- and theyre all hot so why wouldnt they wanna date each other

- i think armin and eren wouldve gotten together first, and then invited mikasa into their relationship

- the three of them have been officially going steady for like over a year now, and its going really well

- they didnt really expect you to drop into their lives tho

- youre an old friend of historia's and you two reconnected after you moved to the city, securing yourself a decent paying job working as a writer for the city paper

- you usually get the boring stuff, never able to get a good story to write about, focusing your time on heartwarming stories in the community or the sports column

- its boring but it pays the bills

- you were thankful when historia called you during your lunch and asked if you wanted to get drinks at a bar with her and a couple of other friends

- of course you said yes

- so historia and her girlfriend ymir picked you up after work, having dinner with them after a long week was the best, but you were a bit nervous to meet all of their friends

- thats how you met eren, mikasa and armin

- at first you were sure that mikasa and eren were dating, seeing as mikasa had her head on the taller man's shoulder, while his arm was wrapped around her

- but when armin leaned down to give mikasa a kiss before heading off to the bar you werent so sure

- ymir pulled you away to get more drinks and explained to you what the situation was, while commenting on the way you gawked at the three of them before

- you were embarassed to say the least but they didnt bring it up that night so you hoped the throuple didnt notice (they did)

- you really hit it off with all of them though, especially sasha and jean, and were constantly talked about among the friend group

- because of your demanding job dealing with writers block and deadlines you couldnt really meet up with all of them often, usually just having sleepovers at ymir and historia's apartment, the three of you drinking while you wrote on your laptop

- after a couple months of casual hangouts with historia and ymir and their friends, you kinda became one of them too which was nice

- you were added to the groupchat, you all followed each other on social media, and a certain brunet had taken a liking to you

- eren didnt know why exactly he was so attracted to you but he was, maybe it was your hair, or how pretty your skin looked even when oily or with breakouts, maybe it was your smile or your body or your sense of humor or you kindness or maybe it was all of it

- eren jaeger would always stay faithful to his boyfriend and girlfriend, but maybe they could add another person into the mix, more to love right ?

- he had only known you for a couple of months though, he didnt want to jump the gun and bring this up with his partners so soon, especially if they didnt feel the same way he did

- and it would be a bummer if you turned out to be a bad person or smth

- so summer rolls around with lots of memories being made with your new friends, as well as friends from work, and you get a girlfriend ??

- shes not really your girlfriend you two have only been out on a couple of dates and she kisses you a lot but, you havent talked about labels

- one night you, along with your friends are back at the same bar where you first met them

"so, tell us about the girl youre seeing." ymir says, smirking over her beer.

eren's ears perked up at the mention of you seeing someone. "girl ?"

historia nodded. "mhm ! y/n's been talking to someone recently, they've gone on dates and kissed and stuff."

"and stuff, jesus tori you make it sound like we've had sex." you sighed.

the blonde just laughed, leaning her body onto her freckled companion.

"well ? what about her ?" eren asks. armin slapped him on the arm, already having suspicions about eren's interest in you.

your shoulders sagged. "well, she's great and everything, truly..."

"but ? is there a but in this ?" connie asked. sasha started laughing at connie's use of the word but, while jean slapped the girl on the arm because of her reaction.

you shrugged, swirling what was left of your fruity cocktail in your glass. "well, i'm not sure. she's very lively, and sweet. but i don't know, i just don't see myself being able to be in a steady relationship with her."

"so you're gonna end it ?" eren asked. you thought he seemed a bit too eager about your failure in the love department.

"why do you care so much ? you like the thought of me being lonely ?" you shot back, before downing the rest of your drink.

"no i just-"

"i think what eren means is," mikasa intervened, her smooth voice calming you as she looked at you with a smile on her face. "is that there's no point in staying with her if you can't see yourself with her. don't lead her on."

you nodded. "you're exactly right my friend. which is the plan for tonight because i," you quickly checked the time on your phone. 8:17. "have a date with miss molly at nine, so i will be taking my leave."

the group engaged in a chorus of boos for leaving so early, while you chuckled and took the lighthearted insults thrown at you by sasha and connie with ease. grabbing all of your things you put down two twenties onto the table. "i'll see you guys later, have a goodnight." as you walked off you heard jean yell "have a good time you heartbreaker !" making you shake your head

- the date with molly went less then well. she yelled, and cried, and even tried hitting you at one point. your walk back from the park was spent blocking her on every form of social media you followed her on, and when you got back to your apartment you spent the night in a hot bath before retiring to bed

- meanwhile, armin and mikasa were trying to pry the truth out of eren, who was constantly denying his attraction to you

- finally mikasa took one for the team "eren, you aren't alone with the way you feel, i do too." this made eren more willing to open up to his partners

- armin doesnt say anything about you, only saying how youre kind. he doesnt feel the way that his girlfriend and boyfriend do, but he knows that may change

- soon enough, more time flies and christmas rolls around, with you all deciding to have a secret santa get together.

- historia invites everyone to her home on christmas eve, with ymir begrudgingly allowing it

- bertholdt and annie come too, reiner not being able to make it due to going home for christmas, while everyone else decided to stay in the city

- you picked out your secret santas at the beginning of november so you would all have enough time to find something for each other, you hoped whoever picked your name gave you something good

- after hours of games and karaoke and drinking you all decided it was time to open the presents

- ymir got socks from bertholdt, connie got an ugly beanie from ymir, historia got new pens from mikasa, mikasa got knitting needles from annie, annie got a dumbell from eren, jean got a not so appropriate t shirt from connie, jean gave sasha more comic books, armin gave new stationary paper to bertholdt, sasha gifted you that new biography you've been wanting to read and you gave armin your old copy of frankenstein by mary shelley

- he was surprised but very thankful, "how did you know i needed a new copy ?" "well i remember you said eren spilt water on your old one, and the pages just stuck together so i thought you might as well have mine"

- it warmed armin's heart that you remembered something so insignificant, and opened him up to the thought of being with you

- the rest of the night was spent with hugs and thankfulness, cheering when the clock struck 12 and it became christmas day

- after getting things cleaned up everyone decided it was time to leave, with armin, eren and mikasa offering to give you a ride home

- a ride where armin straight up kissed you in the backseat

- you stopped him of course, thinking that it was weird he would cheat on his partners right in front of them, while they were shocked all on their own for different reasons, armin who didnt have feelings for you KISSED you

- and surprisingly armin took the lead in explaining how he felt, why he kissed you, an apology for doing so, and an offer to start dating all three of them

- your heart was pounding in your ears and your entire face felt hot, it was probably the alcohol, or the way his lips felt so soft when they touched yours, so you said yes.

- its not smooth sailing from there

- youre kind of awkward

- this is your first relationship where you really feel like you could love these guys (you already do) but its also your first relationship with multiple people

- the trio start inviting you over more often, soon for sleepovers, and start inviting themselves over at your own place, mainly eren

- he just comes at random times, sometimes when youre not even there and waits for you, or stays and cleans up a bit before leaving

- armin and you share a deep love of literature, and you often find yourselves in hot debates about whatever youve read (mikasa and eren have to pry you two away before things get physical)

- mikasa likes to cook with you, she shares recipes that her mom taught her, and her and armin love to cook dinner together whereas eren is the breakfast maker of the household

- the first time you slept in the same bed as them you were so nervous your whole body thumped to the tune of your heartbeat, you were convinced armin could even hear it as he was laying beside you, but eren wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you into his large chest before whispering "youre as stiff as a board, relax honey"

- eren snores, mikasa drools, armin has those dreams where you fall and then violently wake up before you hit the ground

- slowly but surely you stop thinking about your relationship as the trio and you, but as all of you together, and that really helps you come out of your shell a bit

- you may still be in the honeymoon phase, and there may be bumps along the way, but you like being with armin, eren, and mikasa. they make you so happy, it feels like the happiest youve been in a long time

- you like watching eren and armin dance in the living room while you and mikasa cuddle on the couch, before the boys pull you two up as well

- you like when armin reads to you, his soft voice reciting the words of the great gatsby

- you like it when eren can just tell youve had a rough day, and pulls you into a hug like hes protecting you from all the bad things in the world

- you love being with them. you love them. and you think that theyre it for you

i rushed the ending bc im fucking tired but i kinda wanna do a poly!series with like sasha, connie and jean, or annie, bertholdt and reiner, or any other poly ships u guys may request !

so yeah pls give me feedback it rlly helps me figure out whether you want a polyamorous series (or just like what i write in general), and it would be my first series ever which would be super cool anyways

yeah requests open for poly!ships anyways

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platonicavengers · 4 years ago

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headcanons for being the youngest maximoff (part two)

pairings: maximoff twins x sibling!gn!reader && avengers x gn!reader

warnings: spoilers for infinity war + endgame, death, non-descriptive violence, idk

author’s note: IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO COME OUT AAAAAAAA it was supposed to be up a while ago but things got in the way and im so sorry :(

tags: @madamevirgo @euphoniumpets

headcanons under the cut !

after steve broke everyone out of the raft you were all on the run for a while

vision and natasha joined you all at some point, and scott and clint returned home to their families

after a while wanda and vision decided to stay in scotland, leaving you with sam, nat, and steve

you were not a huge fan of the idea of leaving her behind

you had already lost your parents and pietro and even though she wasn’t dead you still wouldn’t be able to see her

but you knew why she did what she did

fast forward a little bit

you find out that tony went missing

and then that wanda and vision are being attacked

so u all fly to scotland to help them

*insert u being a badass and beating the shit out of an alien*

finally reuniting w your sister

there were tears

when you arrived back at the compound it was like a breath of fresh air after so long

it’s a shame you weren’t there under better circumstances

immediately getting upset when you saw the hologram of ross

that motherfucker

anyways

going to wakanda was an.... interesting experience

you wanted to enjoy it

but considering why you were there,,,,,,

it was kinda hard to enjoy it lol

wanda ofc stayed up in the lab with vision and shuri

she wanted you to stay up there as well so she could keep an eye on you

she was very hesitant to let you go into the front lines of the battle

even though you were an adult now you were still her little sibling and she was worried for you

you assured her that you would be fine though

fine might be pushing it but

let’s be realistic here

you kicked some alien ass down there

taking out enemy after enemy with no hesitation

pretty impressive tbh. ur fucking awesome

ily

anyways

eventually wanda came down to join the battle

the two of you fought alongside each other

badass sibling duo ugh yes

but then

you had to go against thanos himself

ugly ass mf

you tried to use your magic to remove his gauntlet

you were unsuccessful

he kinda tossed you to the side like a rag doll

which hurt like a bitch

when he snapped you had no idea what tf to do

i mean you had just lost, what were you supposed to do?

you were in the middle of crawling over to wanda, wanting to try to comfort her over the loss of vision

but then she just kinda, disintegrated?

you were in shock for a minute

but then it hit you

“no, no, no, no, no...”

you started sobbing

now you had officially lost your whole family

after a little bit you made your way over to what was left of the team

you all kinda stood in silence for a little while, just processing everything that had happened

eventually you all returned to the quinjet and flew back home

for the first two-ish weeks after the snap you just locked yourself in your room and refused to leave

though eventually you did leave your room again, though very reluctantly

after three weeks had passed by carol, who you were quite fascinated by, returned to the compound carrying a spaceship with her

turns out tony was on said ship

you were glad to see him after so long

and now we jump to going to space to beat thanos’ ass (a g a i n)

you had never been to space before so it was quite a new experience

shame it was under such poor circumstances

when you arrived at thanos’ residence you were out for blood

he took your last remaining family and you were not in the mood to let him get away with it

and then you found out the stones were gone

and everything he had done couldn’t or so you thought be reversed

you were already ready to kill thanos before, but especially now that that was revealed

sadly though, thor took the responsibility of killing the titan himself

*5 years later*

you were 23 now

a whole ass adult

you still lived at the compound with natasha, not exactly having anywhere else to go

not like you would’ve left anyways but

nat had become your sort of support system over the last few years

after all, at this point you really only had each other

all of the rest of the remaining team went their separate ways, none of which deciding to stay with the two of you

one day though steve comes by

you were glad to see him, you had missed him a lot since he left

the three of you had a not-so-positive conversation and then out of nowhere scott appears at the front gate

he tells you his insane idea of using the quantum realm to time travel back to before thanos

you were very wary

you didn’t exactly have a lot of knowledge on the quantum realm but you could still tell that it seemed risky

the four of you went to tony’s house to try to convince him

he almost immediately said no

yikes

you all tried to convince him but to no avail

so you went to bruce hulk instead

bruce?? hulk?? who tf is he tbh

but anywho

when you saw him you were kinda like ????????

but chose to ignore it

you got him to agree to the time travel thing

and it was ?somewhat? successful

somewhat is pushing it tbh

scott became a baby which wasn’t great

but then tony showed up and fixed it like the genius he is

you helped recruit all the remaining avengers to help w the whole time travel thing

you were going to go back in time and get the stones before thanos could

you went with clint and natasha to vormir

you thought it made the most sense for you to sacrifice yourself

after all you weren’t even positive this whole thing with the stones would work, and you couldn’t risk continuing to live a life without wanda and the rest of the team

they stopped you before you could jump though

when natasha dropped you swore your heart stopped beating

she had been all you had for the past 5 years and then she was just gone

you ended up getting the soul stone but at what cost

you and clint returned to the compound and there was a small ‘memorial’ (for lack of a better word) for natasha

after that tony put all of the stones together into a makeshift gauntlet

after a little bit of deliberation it was decided that bruce would be the one to snap his fingers

bruce, hulk, whatever tf

brulk

LMFAO

sorry back to the headcanons LOL

he snapped

immediately everything felt different

you went out to look out a window, seeing a few butterflies fluttering around that you knew weren’t there before

a smile immediately took over ur face

“hey guys, i think it worked!” - you

you were about to turn around and walk back to everyone else

but then

you saw a large ship in the distance

and something began flying toward the compound

and then everything went dark

when you woke up again you were buried under a bunch of rubble

which bruce picked up off of you

you ran out to where thor, tony, and steve were

you saw thanos and froze

they were engaged in a battle and you tried to keep your distance in order to collect yourself for a moment

which proved to be futile because you were dragged into the fight not long after

you kinda got your ass handed to you

it wasn’t pretty

you were lying on the ground when all of a sudden you saw orange light surrounding you

you looked up to see portals opening, all your allies who you had thought to be dead stepping out

you saw wanda and you stopped breathing for a moment

you got up as quick as you could

which proved to be difficult due to ur injuries and overall extreme fatigue

you launched yourself at her, bringing her into the tightest hug you could muster

the two of you held onto each other for a moment before you had to return to fighting

maximoff sibling teamup part 2???? yeah most definitely

fast forward to after thanos and his bitch ass army lost (im sorry i just really dont have the energy to write all that rn)

and to after tony’s funeral

you and wanda had a l o t of catching up to do

5 years worth LOL

u had to comfort her over vision’s death a lot

considering that to her, that was still only a couple days ago

and a lot of the time when you two talked the mood was kinda depressing, all things considered

but you still tried to keep it lighthearted

for example

your absolute favorite thing in the world was the fact that you were now older than her due to the snap, 3 years older to be exact

you held it over her all the time, constantly making fun of her for it

all in good fun of course

something wanda really loved was when you would tell her stories from when she was in the soul world (only happy ones ofc)

though it made her sad that you had to go so long without her, and she missed out on so much

she wanted to know what she had missed

all in all

you two were incredibly close, the snap and its aftermath only further confirming that

sibling goals tbh

a/n #2: aaaaaa im sorry to end it on that note (i didnt know how to end it im sorry asf) but yeah </3 and once again, so sorry this took me so long to post, ive been super busy with school && life in general so i just havent gotten around to it :( butttttttttttt if u guys want i could try to continue this series of headcanons for wandavision?? i’d wait until friday ofc for the final episode and id spoiler tag it and everything but i could try my best? might be kinda difficult but i think it could be fun so if anyone wants that then lmk!! :)

#avengers x reader #platonic avengers #avengers imagine #avengers fanfiction #avengers x platonic!reader #mcu #marvel fanfiction #marvel imagine #marvel x reader #my writing #wanda maximoff x reader

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ofkareenas · 3 years ago

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. ∘ ∗ : 🐝 𝙸𝙽𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙸𝙽𝙶 …

JANHVI KAPOOR, CIS WOMAN, TWENTY-FIVE, SHE / HER ⟨ ✽ ⟩ hey, you haven’t bumped into kareena puri lately, have you? they have been living here for the past two years and during that time, locals have gotten to know them as charismatic & creative. a little birdie told me they can be quite stubborn & opinionated though. explains why they’re an online fashion brand owner and designer . they really remind me of morning beach walks, sketchbooks filled with new designs, the sound of a sewing machine running. if you’re ever looking for them, i bet you can find them around port briar lighthouse.

hi again, it’s tally ! this is my second baby kareena !! she’s very new to me and it’s pretty exciting bc i tend to just recycle characters kjhfgkj again, if you’d like to plot, please reach out to me on dms, or you can like this and i’ll reach out. you can also talk to me on discord if you’d prefer that. ( gowon face insurance company#8416 ) also pls excuse how messy this is, i havent written a proper full intro in a while.

. ∘ ∗ : 🐝 𝙱𝙸𝙾𝙶𝚁𝙰𝙿𝙷𝚈 …

kareena puri

march 30th, 1996 - 25 yrs old ; aries

cis woman, she/her, bisexual (closeted to her family, not so much to anyone else)

born in mumbai, india. raised in seattle, washington.

currently residing in port briar, maine

pinterest board: here

TW / CW: none, other than a controlling family, which idk if it even should be tagged but yuh

kareena knew it, she was lucky compared to others. she had it better than some of her peers, and she recognized that privilege. but if she could trade her family life for a “normal” one, she would in the quick snap of a finger.

kareena’s family was pretty much old money. she came from a long line of doctors in almost every medical field, and they own so many private hospitals and clinics in many countries. if you happen to hear the Puri family name, you probably would associate it with these things: a big hospital that you probably drove by with your car or a surgeon that your doctor wanted to refer you to.

every child in the family was expected to go to med school. it was the only way to keep the family legacy and pride going. of course, the more new generations came in the family, the more there were those who decided to take different fields of work instead. and of course, the eldest members in the family would always voice their disappointment in them, and would always make sure to remind them that they’re a disgrace no matter how successful they are in whatever field they went into.

kareena didn’t know what she was doing at the young age of sixteen. her parents would boast about how she would be a successful doctor when she grows up, just like her older siblings, and how her younger siblings would be the same as well. all kareena did was nod and smile. she didn’t want this.

the thing is, she was a naturally great student with really good grades, and yet her parents would be disappointed if she got a B+ or even an A- on a subject every once in a while. she didn’t get it. she thought she was doing her best. although the complaining about her report cards was getting a bit too much coming from her mother, and that’s when kareena really started to not give a fuck. yes, she still got good grades for her own sake, but she started to do whatever she wanted. she hung out with kids her parents would call a bad influence, and started to skip some school days or go to parties on the weekends. it was fun and liberating to her.

once her senior year was over and kareena was graduated with a high school diploma, her family was back at it again, trying to get her to apply to all the notable medical schools out there. she had protested about it, and family fights ensued, and with some threats, kareena was forced into applying. next school year, she was in another city, studying to be a surgeon, and her mind wasn’t into it at all. she only lasted one year before she decided to drop out and transfer to FIDM, a fashion school in L.A, instead.

kareena has always been into fashion. the way she dressed would tell you so. how she was always on the latest fashion, and how she would have so many sketchbooks and scrapbooks of fashion related things. she loved making her own clothes at home with her sewing machine. her mother would tell her that it’s a nice hobby, but she never guessed that her daughter would want to pursue it as a career. the color drained out of her face when she saw what kareena had done. she was angry and disappointed, and mostly worried about what the rest of the family would say, more than she cared about her daughter’s wants and needs. kareena, however, didn’t care. she was happy. she moved out to be closer to campus, and soon enough after graduation, she left everything behind and decided to go somewhere quieter: port briar, maine. this was completely different from everything she was used to, it was so quiet and small, but she loved it. she finally feels at peace with herself.

now, kareena is a successful fashion designer. she started an online business, and it has been booming, with fashion influencers promoting her work. she was hoping that someday she would get to do bigger things, like making custom items for celebrities and being featured in fashion magazines and fashion weeks. she could only wish and work towards that for now.

and even with all of that, even when kareena had picked herself up from the ground on her own and built her own business, her family still didn’t approve. they still pretended to care about her, but would make sure to remind her of how disappointed they are in her and the path she’d taken. they would sit and wonder what it would’ve been like if she continued to go to med school, and how successful she could’ve been. and all kareena would do in response is smile and say that she’s successful anyway, but at least now she’s doing something she actually loves.

. ∘ ∗ : 🐝 𝙷𝙴𝙰𝙳𝙲𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽𝚂 …

born in mumbai, india. moved to seattle, washington when she was still a baby, and was raised there for the rest of her life, all while still visiting family back home.

kareena is the middle child of 5 siblings. two older brothers and two younger sisters

she is bisexual, and she’s pretty open about it. except to her family. shes not out to them

she believes in working hard, but she also believes that everyone deserves to have fun and get a break every once in a while. she currently is the only main person doing all the work for her business, but she’s hoping to soon hire anyone who has the same interests as her

her designs are mostly evening wear dresses and such. think teuta matoshi or marionela type of dresses, all flowy and puffy, giving fantasy feels

altho i would say her success is more like early hope macaulay, when she was still starting out. if no one is familiar with her, she is an irish fashion and textile designer who got famous for her knit wear on instagram, and she’s p young !! u might recognize her work if u look her up <3

she currently lives alone port briar, with her rented home facing the beach. exactly how she likes it. it was different and definitely not lavish like her home growing up, but she liked it better. she could’ve lived somewhere more expensive, but she didn’t want that.

owns a studio where she usually works. there is more space for her there than what she used to have at home. all the design process, sewing and even photoshoots take place there usually

if not working, kareena could be found at the rocky beaches near the port’s lighthouse or off somewhere on an adventure. she is always here to have a good time

honestly kareena is still such a new character for me, so if i think of any other hcs, i’ll add them here

. ∘ ∗ : 🐝 𝙲𝙾𝙽𝙽𝙴𝙲𝚃𝙸𝙾𝙽𝚂 …

friends from school, could be from seattle or L.A: kareena would’ve kept in contact with those friends tbh shes the type of person to keep her friends around. even if they were just added to her snapchat or followed on instagram. she would keep up with them

toxic relationship / gf: THIS

exes ?? we could definitely plot this out

high school ex perhaps 👀

FWB: no strings attached

neighbors: she lives on sea sprite lane

family members? kareena would be hoping that left them all behind in the past, but it can’t be denied that she has a big family and she could possibly run into any of them at any moment

omg crush perhaps ! idm if it’s one sided, and it could either be kareena having feelings or the other person

a friend she had a falling out with: she probably met this person two years ago when she first moved here. something might’ve happened and one thing after another, they dropped each other and it was probably the worst falling out for both of them

clients / customers for her business perhaps. or maybe a helping hand!!

literally anything u wanna do, lets gooo

#briar.intro #heheh it's finally here

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newtedison · 4 years ago

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my thoughts on the crank palace

i touched about this a bit on twitter (@newtedison_) but i figured i would Try and touch on my points more here (spoilers obv) again, its sort of lengthy

1. im gonna start with talking about the ending because i need to get it out of the way. either i havent read the books in a while and i forgot some canon (which could very well be true, i literally forgot that Bliss was a thing) or this ending makes no sense and is (somehow) setting up for a tdc sequel? so first off, newt was shot in the Head with a Bullet and somehow didnt immediately die? i know that that can happen in real life but it just seems so unlikely that not only would he not die, but he would survive long enough for someone from WCKD to transport him back to their labs and try to revive him. and who the fuck was he talking to? did thomas get newt’s journal at some point and i just dont remember? like i said, either im forgetting stuff or this ending doesnt make sense and is setting up a sequel which...i’ll get to later

2. why was this written? like, what was the point? i understand that this wasnt going to be all sunshine and rainbows but i feel like i was reading torture porn. like, literally all that happens is newt gets tortured (which is described in detail) by WCKD soldiers, has bouts of insane-fueled rage where he KILLS MULTIPLE PEOPLE, and then he dies. ??? what did this contribute to the canon? what was this trying to accomplish? truthfully, i never really wanted a newt-POV...well, anything except for maybe those little nuggets he wrote some time ago. but even if i HAD wanted a newt-POV novella, this is not what i would have wanted. he KNOWS that newt is almost universally the most loved character in this franchise. you can tell because he constantly uses him as a way to get fans in his good graces again. so why on earth would he take that character that so many people love and write a novella where its torture porn and a descent into madness before death? i am not interested in that At All. i’ve read fics (and even written a drabble) where newt is a Crank, and those were more respectful and easier to read than tcp. the parts where newt is having bouts of the Flare were literally exhausting to read; it was described in such vivid and torturous detail that it made me sick reading it. and it didnt help that newt is a character i care a lot about. i didn’t need to know what becoming a Crank felt like. the way it was described in the other books (and even the movies) told me everything i needed to know. the way thomas and everyone found newt at the crank palace in tdc and hes described as obviously not well, but not knowing what exactly happened to him...thats good enough on its own. the mystery of what exactly newt had to endure is part of what gives his journey more emotional depth. not everything needs to be written out and explained. not every gap needs to be filled in.

3. me saying “the characterization felt off” is going to make some people roll their eyes because ‘duh, sami, the characterization will be off because he’s going insane’ to which i say...exactly. we weren’t really reading a newt-POV novella, were we? even if he isn’t past the Gone in the beginning, hes clearly not the same person we knew him as. the whole novella felt like an uncanny valley situation; i knew i was supposed to be reading about newt, but it felt like i was reading about someone else who looked like him. and that is part of what made this such a disconnect and made me lose interest at parts. not only that, but the world building and lore is inconsistent. newt makes a comment about how it used to rain in the glade, and apparently (as ive been told) that is simply not true. keisha having somehow working cell phone that magically connects her to her family also doesnt make sense. how would they have each others’ numbers? what are the odds that they BOTH found working cell phones in an apocalypse? i get that its a novella but you cant just throw something that crazy in there as a plot convenience. actually work on your plot and world building in a cohesive way, please. and another thing that doesnt make sense...

4. ...is newt finding out that sonya is his sister. if there was anything i would have wanted from a newt-pov novella, it would have been this. him finding out that not only is sonya his sister, but he already knows her post-WCKD. something that would have made this novella actually captivating, contributing something worthwhile to the canon that i would actually want to read, is if newt found out while in the crank palace that sonya was his sister; the Flare would remove that part of the Slice in his brain, and he would realize it was her. then, knowing that he couldnt go past the Gone before seeing her, he would try to find a way to get back to her. he could learn this after thomas and everyone originally see him, so it could match up with the canon. and then, by the time 250 comes along, hes lost all hope of that actually happening, and lashes out to thomas in a fit of rage. the journey of him trying to find his ACTUAL sister would have meant more to me than the story of keisha and dante. trust me, i love a found family trope as much as the next girl. but this series is FULL of the found family trope. it pretty much is the backbone of the franchise. so to see a blood family dynamic would have been a refreshing change of pace that i actually would have been interested in reading. also, the way that newt DOES find out about sonya is...underwhelming. he just randomly says “you remind me of my sister, sonya” to keisha in the WCKD truck. first of all, sonya is not the name you would actually know her by. you would know her by her birth name (which is lizzy? elizabeth?). second, why does he act like he didnt already meet her in the series? when the WCKD doctor tells him sonya is his sister and is alive, hes so surprised. wouldn’t he have known that already? why is there not more emphasis on the fact he already met her? that would have been a really interesting dynamic to explore, and im sad they didnt

5. the pacing and dialogue of tcp is so dragged out. i remember specifically there was a section where newt goes to talk to keisha after she starts abandoning dante, and i swear to god there was a page and a half of text before anything ACTUALLY happened or anyone ACTUALLY said anything. dashner described a launcher at one point as “the energy dependent electric firing projectile device.” that’s SIX words to describe a stun gun. a fucking stun gun! we know what it is! why did you have to use six words??? it just felt like everything was dragged and stretched to the longest it could possibly be and it added to the exhaustion i felt while reading it

6. okay i cant end it without talking about newtmas. its very obvious by now that newtmas is a VERY large part of this fanbase. its clearly the most popular ship and what keeps a lot of people interested in this series. even the marketing team for the MOVIES used newtmas as a advertising tactic (i.e.; using thomas and newt standing face to face as a thumbnail for the trailer, emphasizing newtmas based questions in interviews, even making a fucking facebook memories video for them. yes that last one is real). not only does dashner use newt as a way to lure fans in; he also uses newtmas. the parts that were sprinkled into this were so obvious that it didnt feel authentic. i cant speak for the original trilogy; i dont know the culture around ships back then, and i dont know how much it influenced his writing at the time. but the scenes in those books felt more genuine than tcp. by genuine i mean; he wrote scenes without a relationship in mind, but the chemistry had noticeable subtext that, while unintentional, was largely agreed upon by the larger audience. the parts of newtmas he added into tcp felt artificial and forced, likely as a way for people to take snippets of and use as a free marketing tool for him. one example you might have already seen; “he had already gotten used to his post-thomas, post-WCKD life.” the fact that dashner SPECIFICALLY used the phrase “post-thomas” rather than “post-his friends” or something similar shows that he is using newtmas as a hook on purpose. not only that, but to make newt’s last thoughts as he died “tommy. tommy will understand...” is...wow. first of all, i never wanted to know what newt’s dying thoughts were, but thanks, i guess? and second, when we all initially thought newt died underneath thomas with a gun to his head, i was pretty much inferred that newts last thoughts would probably be about thomas; they would sort of have to be, given the circumstances. so adding that in gives me the same feeling that “i’m coming for you, newt” at the end of the fever code gave me. not as offensive, but written very much on purpose. and the ending is implying that there will somehow be a sequel where thomas gets newt’s journal from...someone. at this point, i can only think that this sequel will retroactively make newtmas canon somehow. now that newt has been confirmed as gay, it could happen. which brings me to my last point...

7. hearing dashner confirm newt is gay was already mind-boggling before. now that i’ve read the crank palace...im angry. im very angry. i think its safe to say that newt is the character that suffers the most in this series. you can argue with me but hes definitely high on the list, if not #1. so; you take this character. you give him a horribly sad arc in the original trilogy, then decide to expand upon it and tell us, your largely QUEER fanbase, exactly how painful and torturous his last days were, in detail. and then you tell us he’s gay. something that is never mentioned in the canon, only in an offhanded reply to a tweet of someone calling you out. on a base level, i can understand why people would be happy. representation (i guess), seeing themselves in the character, having their headcanons be confirmed. great. but what i see is you telling your largely queer fanbase “hey, you see the only confirmed gay character? im going to literally write torture porn about him before killing him off and offer it to you like im providing a service to your community.” how fucked up is that? “hey, kids, if youre gay, you WILL be violently tortured and become violent and a danger to the ones you love. then you will die and your love will never be reciprocated.” what a message! and if he DOES end up retroactively making newtmas “canon” in some weird sequel...i will start foaming at the mouth. THIS is an example of how not all queer representation is good or genuine.

i’ve definitely forgotten some points but this is long enough already. let me know if you agree or if theres anything else you want to add! im interested in what you guys think

(8. I JUST REMEMBERED!!! if WCKD needed to study newt so bad bc sonya is his sister and is immune while he isnt, why did they let him run around the crank palace in the first place??? you cant test his vitals or anything you’re literally just watching him. what is the point????)

#my fingers hurt from typing lol #the crank palace #the maze runner #newt #newtmas #anyway...

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ledamemangociana · 4 years ago

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RANKING HAISUTE (or the ones i’ve seen so far)

not that anyone has asked me, but i’ve literally been so hyperfixated on these shows for MONTHS and although i’ve gotten my bestie into them now, it’s not like i can bombard them with all these deep-ish dives into these things and how much and why i love them, so i thought HEY why not just put it out into the ether coz DAMN i really wanna talk about them.

under the cut for length (HELLA LENGTH) and spoilers.

let me preface this first by saying i havent seen ALL the shows yet. i havent ever watched the first run of Itadaki No Keshiki, and i havent seen any of the new Karasuno cast shows yet, as by the time i had gotten hooked on these shows, the time to watch Strongest Challengers and Battle At The Garbage Dump on DMM.com had passed, and with my limited budget (i havent been able to work properly since literally mid-July last year), it’ll be a while before i can afford their twin pack DVD when it comes out next month. ALTHOUGH i am hoping to be able to download Fly High on DMM.com before the availability runs out in the middle of March, if i’ll actually have enough money for that.

additionally, i rank these from my least favorite to most favorite, but that does not mean that i hate or dislike any of them. in fact, i have little to zero negative things to say about any of these shows. i just happen to love some more than the others, and i think you’ll be able to tell by how long i go on about each show. i’ll TRY to keep things concise but im telling you now, i’ve already tried this once until an accidental button press erased everything i had written, and this will not be short. at all.

i’ll start first with the things i love about Haisute in general:

quite obviously, the projections. before i finally saw Haisute this year, i had only ever seen BNHA, KNY and Kuroshitsuji musicals, and while they have awesome set pieces, i had never seen video projections utilized the way Haisute does, and i think it’s so wonderful and creative, and so technically sound on everyone’s part. like, it has to be so precise with cast performance and blocking and sound and lights...like. dudes. shout-out to the tech staff of Haisute, y’all are amazing.

the acting performances in general. i dont think there’s a bad actor at all in any of these. some stiff-ish performances (Noah Ishikura as Lev, but mostly in SoE, which was his first time acting ever, so understandable), maybe, but even those actors do great when they’re having a pivotal moment, scene or dialogue. it’s hard to pick faves but somehow i do have them, lol - Kenta Suga as Hinata (obviously), Kentaro as Daichi, Hiroki Ino as Suga, Kousuke Asuma as Oikawa, literally ALL THREE BOKUTOS, literally BOTH AKAASHIS, Ami Saito as Yachi, Tatsunari Kimura as Kageyama, and my top two faves, Shori Kondo and Takato Nagata as KuroKen. for obvious reasons (see: my numerous gifsets that i still have so much to add to alkdjf).

the music is WONDERFUL. the varieties across shows, teams and characters while still maintaining the main themes are just so good. it’s easier for them to be highlighted to since there isnt any singing, and so many moments are told through the music rather than the music accompanying the moment imo.

the choreography is gold af. im sad we lose HIDALI after Tokyo Battle, but im sure the rest of the shows still keep that amazing spark. but i juST. HIDALI’s choreography is iconic. i’ll talk abt it a bit more in some of the entries in the list.

OKAY, now on to the rankings.

7. View from the Top (2nd Run) so again, I DONT HATE ANY OF THESE SHOWS. the reason this is at the bottom of my list is mostly because of what it doesnt have through no fault of its own, rather than anything that it does. i personally love watching character growth and evolution, so for the most part, the first story in anything that has multiple follow-ups tend to be my least favorite part, and i come to enjoy them more as a “look how far we’ve come” thing. that being said, i do think this was such an awesome show to kick-off what has become an iconic 2.5D franchise. so much of it feels like the transition from potential to kinetic energy. a little show that could, and then did. i do think i enjoy this more with a nostalgic sort of fondness than i do with a “look how cool this thing is!” feeling, but again, that’s coz i enjoy watching things changing rather than at the start. what definitely stands out to me here is that i came to it this as only my fourth 2.5D franchise, and the ones i’d watched before this were so different in staging and execution, and that really had me hooked. also, this franchise honestly is one of the best casting in any show i’ve ever seen in my life, like wtf, i havent seen a badly cast actor at all, even for the side characters i dont really pay that much attention to otherwise. you cant help but be sucked into the bright light that is Kenta Suga, and Kousuke Asuma has to be the most Oikawa Oikawa to ever Oikawa anything Oikawa. Tatsunari, Ryotaro and Justin absolutely jumped right out of the manga and anime and onto the stage as Kags, Tsukki and Asahi. and GAWD do i love me some Kentaro and Hiroki as DaiSuga. i went in a big fan and simp of Hiroki Ino and Sugawara, so for the first couple of watches, i was heavily focused on Ino!Suga, but by the third rewatch, Ken-chan came around a corner and smacked me in the face with a 2x4 wrapped in barbed wire. when that man smiles, i just get murdered.

6. Start of the Giant i honestly had a hard time picking between this and InK for the bottom spot, not because i hate this (AGAIN, I DONT HATE ANY OF THESE SHOWS), but because of how this show feels to me. ultimately, i picked this one to win over InK because of how much character progression is shown between these two shows. stating the obvious, KAZUMA KAWAHARA. HOO BOY. and big, BIG shout-outs to Kouhei Shiota for portraying Tanaka’s emotional roller-coaster so excellently to stride alongside Ennoshita’s big journey and Kazuma’s powerhouse performance. i also wanna spotlight how much more comfortable Tatsuya Kageyama was in his second go-around as Kags, and how well Keita Tanaka and Naoki Tanaka came in as new(old)!Daichi and new!Suga. it took me a while to get to this show because i was so sad to lose Ken-chan and Hiroki after SoE, and i thought i just would not be able to love DaiSuga the same way. turns out that that’s a good thing, because they do play similar but different DaiSugas to Kentaro and Hiroki. it possibly also helped to know that KT wasn’t entirely new, and to have known of Naoki from BNHA (with Hiroki!), although i hadnt known it was him until i started the show up at last, lol. Kentaro got to play a captain who was warm and very much one of the boys, someone who was growing into the role of a captain of a team that had a very real chance of going farther than it had in a while, while KT got to play a Daichi who, fittingly, was more established as a pillar of the group (and im sure the storytelling of this show helped with that), more of that Dadchi that we know and love. Hiroki got to play a gentle but mischeivous Suga who was all about watching over and taking care of the team, watching and waiting for his turn while understanding that Kags was their best chance, while Naoki got to play a more active, more athletic Suga who was becoming more active the closer the team got to Nationals. their performances stood out not just coz they were new, but because of the theme of this story in particular, about captains and leading, so i thought it was quite a nice way to welcome them into the fold. i also of course enjoyed Johzenji and Wakunan, maybe Johzenji more than Wakunan. i saw someone say they’re a bit like Fukurodani and Nekoma lite, and i can totally see and agree with that. this show also feels a bit like Revival lite, in that it’s got a fun first half and then a more action-packed second match with an emotional gutpunch at the end. but ultimately, this is lower on my list because, through no major fault of its own, it felt like a filler show, considering what was coming after this. it felt a bit like “lets’ get on with this story so we can get on to the last hurrah that everyone is looking forward to.” of all the side teams to have been portrayed in the Engeki story, i feel like i remember johzenji and wakunan less. again, that’s not really anyone’s fault, it’s just where this show was positioned in the timeline and what it was ultimately representing. as a parting thought tho, i just wanna shout-out the new lighting scheme they did for this show, especially coming from SoE where there was a lot of darkness or back-lighting. this show is brighter lit in general than most of the shows that came before it, and idky exactly but i do appreciate that a lot.

5. Winners And Losers objectively, this is probably one of the top 3 shows in all of Haisute’s history. but it’s lower on my list because it is the most taxing to watch and rewatch, not because it’s too slow or anything like that, but because it really just is such a tiring story, and i think that’s deliberate on the part of the writers and directors. this was Karasuno’s first major loss, and it was against an opponent they thought they knew, so of course the lead-up had to be a big deal. it’s also a story that revolves quite a bit around kageyama reaching a turning point and learning a few lessons that would ultimately change him, so the story had to also execute that change happening not just in Kageyama but around him. add to that the fact that this was Tatsunari’s goodbye performance (as well as Shohei’s as Noya, but then he doesn’t really get a big emotional moment here) and it’s just heavy on the emotions all around. the comedic distraction of ShoriTaka as Tetsuko and Kenko was honestly quite welcome, lmao. quick little shout-out to Kousuke Asuma and Allen Kohatsu as IwaOi, since they got to really show off the different sides to both those characters in this, and they just are stellar in general. that bit at the end of one of their flashbacks where Iwa-chan tells Oikawa that he’s not the only one fighting, there’s six people in that team, and Oikawa breaks into laughter as Kousuke strips off the flashback jacket, and Iwa’s like “uuuhhh did i hit you too hard, or?” UGH, i love that bit, that almost creepy laugh from Kousuke and the way he comes out of it to say “suddenly im not so upset” is just SO good. im also so happy to see Hiroki get his due as Suga when he finally gets to step up to the plate - or net, as it were - and basically pinch-hit for Kags. he plays senpai!Suga so sweetly, like you really can’t help but love him coz he’s so caring. i also did not expect to be hit right in the feels with the switch back from him to Kageyama, but that bit where he says “it’s frustrating, but hinata’s expression when he’s hitting my sets is different from when it’s yours” really got me. and then when he had to leave the court, asahi and daichi send a fist bump his way, and he gives just this tiny fist bump wave that’s both tired and disappointed and sad, and it’s juST! it hurts me everytime. and before this gets long, im gonna just spotlight the last 10-15 minutes of the show, right after Karasuno loses. Kenta absolutely nails Hinata’s expression in the manga, that wide-eyed disbelief and shock. and then when Daichi tells him not to apologize because he didn’t miss, when Daichi just walks over and hugs him, good gawd. (sidebar, but i’m so glad i got to see that bit with both Ken-chan here and KT in Strongest Team.) and the way Hinata couldn’t move after thanking the audience, not even after Ukai called him back, so Daichi had to actually go get him? my heart was in PIECES. and then the fuggin dinner scene. LORD ABOVE. like, if you dont love Kenta Suga as Hinata, this is the scene that should convince you you’re wrong.

4. The Strongest Team this is right smack dab in the middle of the list because it’s probably the best staged show of all the seven that i’ve seen, but it also hurts me so much for all the obvious reasons. this is the one i’ve rewatched the least, and everytime i rewatch it, i cry as if it’s the first time im watching it. the whole show absolutely feels like a tribute to the Karasuno cast and all the growth they’ve had and contributed to Haisute over their three years with the show, and the entire thing feels so fond, if that makes any sense. everyone on the team gets a big emotional moment, and it’s so sweet to see them each paid tribute. aside from them, i gotta AGAIN shout-out kousuke as oikawa. i like aoba josai enough, i like oikawa enough as a character, but that moment when kousuke absolutely broke down in the locker room after losing to karasuno broke my heart, even more so knowing that he absolutely felt all that gratitude because he wasnt sure he’d be able to come back to the show coz of his hip injury. i think one little moment that doesnt get as talked about as it should is just after he and Iwaizumi have that short convo of always being each other’s partners even after they’ve moved on to different schools. they do their fist bump, and then Iwa walks away, but Kousuke/Oikawa is still absolutely in tears, and as Iwa walks off, he just kind of reaches out and lets out a pained “Iwa-chan!” that’s just barely audible, and that jUST. GETS ME EVERYTIME. hell, im feeling a little heartstring pull right now just thinking about it. i also wanna shout-out Shiratorizawa because Engeki made me actually care about them. like, okay - i dont hate Shiratorizawa, at all. but watching the anime, despite having an entire season be around them, i just never really latched onto them. i like Ushiwaka enough, and i just...dont like Tendou (sue me). but Engeki Haikyuu has a habit of spotlighting other teams and characters enough to make you actually think about them and care about them, and Shiratorizawa was the biggest example of that for me. their theme is awesome, it’s this big, deep, heavy thing that feels as big and broad as the players look. and i could feel their almost militaristic teamwork when the coach is on them, and it’s so good. speaking of Coach Washijo, shout-out to that flashback scene to his younger days. Kenta looked absolutely risible in the wig and giant eyebrows, but i think it was an important touch to have the person playing Hinata be the person playing younger Washijo, because their inner conflicts are basically the same, and Washijo comes to appreciate Hinata’s efforts because of it, so i thought that was a nice touch. (still dont like Tendou tho, sue me.) i gotta end this entry coz it’s getting long, so im just gonna quickly list my favorite scenes/moments:

Yamaguchi’s pinch serve, and bringing out the spear. Kairi Miura wields that spear like he’s been doing it all his life.

Tsukki’s big “GODDAMMIT I THINK I LOVE VOLLEYBALL NOW” moment. the expression on ryotaro’s face right at the end of that scene, where he’s basically saying “it’s just a club, AND YET!” uuuggggghhhh, please i love it. also, shout-out to when Hinata pointed at him and just said “...nice.” like...that always feels like only half Hinata and Tsukki, and more half-Kenta and his best friend Ryotaro, just like the “Tsukki! that one was worth a 100 points!” line that absolutely gets Ryotaro so that on the live cam he had to turn his head away before he meant to for the next bit.

that moment in the last-ish set of the match where everyone is just DESPERATE to win, so it becomes this frantic rally and volley where everyone just starts to grunt and yell louder and louder, and people are running back and forth and jumping and diving, and it’s just this cacophony of sound and blur of movement that just seems to stretch on and on, until finally Shiratorizawa just yells “SHUT UP! WE’RE STRONGER!” and knocks all of Karasuno down. WHEW. that bit is just. WHEW. i almost always forget to breathe at that point. and then the waterworks get turned on as Ukai tearfully tells them to get back up, because volleyball is a sport where you HAVE to look up. LORDDDDD.

the bit towards the end of the match, after tsukki returns from his injury, where they absolutely acted out Ushiwaka pushing Hinata and Tsukki to the floor and holding their heads down. when i first watched it, i gasped because that is straight out of the anime and manga, and then when the rest of Karasuno came in to pull Ushi off, i just turned into a giant sobbing mess.

the graduation curtain call, obviously, but in particular, the bit that will ALWAYS, WITHOUT FAIL, destroy me is when Kenta says “this show was so tiring and tough sometimes, but when i look back, all i can remember are the good times, the best times.” GODDAMMIT IM TEARING UP BADLY RN JUST THINKING ABOUT THAT BIT.

3. Summer Of Evolution this is where the lines between the rankings get a little bit blurred, because i love these top three equally for the most part, but i had to choose a number two (i absolutely know what my number one is), and when i really think about it, SoE just gets edged out by my number two, but barely. i think what i love the most about this show is that this, more than any of the other shows, really portrays these characters as high school kids. and that’s not just because part of the story is set in the school and it’s actually showing the school sometimes, but coz they’re going through and portraying teenage experiences and emotions. most of the other shows portray the team in matches, so we’re seeing them more as volleyball players than teenagers or students, but we get to finally see that here, and it’s really refreshing. other than that, im gonna try to just list some of my highlights and favorites again coz i dont wanna keep going too long:

im so glad to finally have girls on the show, and not just in a “YAY FEMINISM! GIRL POWER! WHOO!” kind of way. kiyoko has always felt like an inextricable part of the team for me, so it was bittersweet to have such a great Karasuno cast but without a Kiyoko, so i was REALLY happy to finally get her here! and for a first time actor ever, Shizune was so awesome! she absolutely has that gentle strength that Kiyoko has, and the way she’s been written in absolutely does feel like she’s always been there. i do wish she got more to do with the third year boys, but all in all, it’s SO good to have an actual Kiyoko who absolutely looks like she came out of the manga.

im also just so DAMN happy about Yachi and her portrayal here. i think ami saito is so dang perfect, and yachi is such a fun addition that fits right in with the chaotic fun of Karasuno. one thing that i REALLY love, though, is how she gets to just act. before Haisute, my only experience of female characters and actors on a 2.5D stage is with Uraraka (and two or three other female students) in BNHA and Elizabeth in Kuroshitsuji, and those characters are your typical cutesy girls, and their movements and body language are so typically girly, you know what i mean, those softer arms and smaller movements, looser fingers, these little “Kyaa~” things, those things. but Kiyoko, Yachi and Saeko arent like that, so that’s not how they’re portrayed here. Ami as Yachi is just as loud and expressive and active as the Karasuno boys, bar actually playing in a match. also, her chemistry with Kenta is SO GOOD. i dont really ship YachiHina, i think they’re cute friends, but BOY DID THESE TWO MAKE ME RETHINK THAT. ami’s Yachi with Kenta’s Hinata made me think “YOU KNOW WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE THESE TWO GO ON A CHAPERONED DATE.” they’re adorable. a particular fave of mine is when hinata climbs a tree to help a baby bird back into its nest and he asks Yachi if she wants to climb up too, and also after Yachi finishes making the Hinata poster, she jumps onto the back of Hinata’s bike and they ride off-stage together. PLEASE IT’S SO CUTE.

also: SAEKO NEE-SAN PLEASE STEP ON ME.

OH HI FUKURODANI. they are such good chaos boys, i love them. i dont have much to say about them here just yet, but WOW im so glad to have them onstage at last.

NEKOMA IS BACK THANK GAWD I LOVE NEKOMA. of all the teams portrayed, i think nekoma is the one that feels the most connected together (AHA!). like, even when they have a new character and/or cast member, the new ones never really stand out as new, they feel like they’ve always been there. this play really showcases the teams at their most casual so we dont get to see as much of their excellent teamwork and connection as we do in past and future shows, but you really get a sense of their family dynamic and just GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH, and honestly dont get me started on ShoriTaka, i will literally never stop

shout-out to Tatsuya Kageyama, he had big shoes to fill not just in terms of character but also as an actor, since this is his first show ever. much like with KT and Naoki as DaiSuga, it does feel like he plays a similar enough Kageyama without just mimicing Tacchu. this is also the right Kags arc to introduce a new Kageyama actor with as well, since there’s a big change after that loss to Aoba Josai and Oikawa, so i think the writing of the show also absolutely helped Kage-chan ease into his role, and helped the audience ease into this new Kageyama. overall, i think he did an awesome job, and we’re really fortunate to have had two awesome Kageyamas before gen 1/1.5 changed to gen 2.

i also just noticed/realized that the backstage video for SoE starts with the introduction of Kage-chan and Fucchi as new cast members, and ends with the farewell to Ken-chan and Hiroki as graduating members, and i know that’s just natural coz the first time the Karasuno cast met the two new members was at the photoshoot for visuals, but also what a nice little circle of life there.

COMING INTO THE HOMESTRETCH NOW, if you’ve made it this far, thank you SO MUCH, im sorry, i really just have a tendency to ramble, and like i said, i dont really have anyone or an opportunity to talk this deep about these shows to, so thanks so much for your time.

2. Karasuno, Revival! WHEW okay, so idk if this is Unpopular Opinion or controversial coz objectively it is the best show so far, and i’ve put it only at number 2. BUT LISTEN: before i saw Tokyo Battle, this was absolutely my number 1 favorite. the Dateko match is so good and so fun to watch, and honestly, that rap battle gives me so much life im almost immortal now. i LOVE that they also got to show ikejiri (THANK YOU KENTA SUGA) and ken-chan as daichi got his moments because of it, and it gave us “katou tou shinakya, katenai!” as an iconic quote and theme for the show, we got a fantastic moment for Asahi that was paid off from the previous show, also honestly “otchita kyougo, tobenai garasu” is just gonna be stuck in your head forever for a while. we also got Kousuke and Allen’s excellent IwaOi back, bringing with them their “Iwa-chan, are you my mom” dynamic (and gawd the cackle i let out when Iwa yeets a volleyball at Oikawa, or that turn and yell that makes Oikawa yelp as he exits off stage lkasdjf), which is always a plus. but! BUT!! best thING FOR ME???? NEKOMA, BABY!! like im sorry, im biased, but i fuggin LOVE nekoma, kuroo is my favorite character in the entire series, and Haisute really gave them a fantastic story and dynamic, because again, there’s so much you can do on stage that you sometimes cant do in anime or manga, so they were really able to highlight Nekoma’s famous teamwork, especially when centered around Kenma. more on that later, but like. it was just such a JOY to watch Karasuno, still kind of scattered puzzle pieces at this point trying to figure out how to best go together to create one big picture, go up against the smooth teamwork of Nekoma, and learn and grow from it. also they honestly have the best team theme music and team dance, fite me. also thank you Haisute for making KuroDai so painfully real lakdsfj

1. Tokyo Battle okay okaY OKAY OKAY OKAY. i think there are some people who actually like this the least coz it’s just too different from the rest of the shows that came before it - no Karasuno, less projections, different music style, aesthetically different stage, etc. B U T. aside from me just being biased because Nekoma are my favorite team, i actually think many of those differences are what makes this show my favorite one. first of all, the music is LIT AF. the themes for each team are so distinct, they really help play up the animal motifs that are played up the most in this show than in any of the others. secondly, THAT CHOREOGRAPHY THO. good gawd. HIDALI said “it’s our last Haisute, let’s go out with a bang” and they really fuggin did. Fukurodani absolutely is TOKYO PARTY TIME, they got to really play up their party birds schtick and i love it. Nohebi i cannot HELP but love because i love snakes, but also, with Nohebi’s cast, you can tell the choreographers were so happy to finally have an actual technical dancer. they had yuu fukuzawa doing the most and then some in playing up the snake theme, and it’s literally so hypnotic to watch his pops, locks and isolations. he’s also just such an AWESOME daisho, and it helps that nohebi are written to be cunning and sneaky. i also love that he and Kuroo seem to actually have a lot of untold history, and i kind of wish we could get a bit more elaboration on that, coz Yuu’s and Shori’s chemistry as frenemy team captains is SO GOOD. and then of course. NEKOMA, BABY!! so okay. kenma absolutely should be the lead of this show, and he is, BUT he’s also, to a certain extent, inextricable from Kuroo and the rest of the team, so that you dont always get that feeling of Kenma being in the spotlight the same way Hinata is (for understandable reasons since Nekoma arent even really the main characters of the story as a whole), and i think that’s important because, again, Nekoma is all about that teamwork and connection. like, Kenma is the lead because he thinks for Nekoma, and Nekoma acts accordingly, instead of how it is usually where the story is showing Hinata’s perspective alone. it also feels like that in terms of the actors. like, technically Takato is zachou, and he is, but also several times in the curtain call speeches, the cast members refer to or mention both Takato and Shori together. even Takato says that when he had spoken to Kenta about how nervous he was about taking up the zachou mantle from him, Kenta had said “if it’s you and shori, you’ll be fine.” they are a unit, and it really comes across in their portrayals of Kuroo and Kenma as well, and even if you love nothing else about this show, you literally cannot help but love that about them. i think the show does a great job revolving the Nekoma team dynamic around that too without making it the ONLY thing that keeps Nekoma together. the star of the show is absolutely the theme of “connection” (more than the other theme of promises), and if you’ve seen the show and you dont cry at the “Tsunage” section as Nekoma wins the match against Nohebi, then are you really watching the show lmao.

OKAY OKAY I’VE REALLY RAMBLED ON, and if you made it all the way here, THANK YOU AND IM SORRY. but also, there’s still a lot of things i wanna talk about that i didnt talk about here coz im mostly a scatterbrain and live half my life radiating BDE - Bokuto Dumbass Energy. so if you’re also ridiculously obsessed with these shows and wanna talk about it, my inbox is open. someone come hyperfixate with me while i make SO MANY MORE GIFSETS OHMYGOD ALL THE GIFSETS geezas crust when i get to Tokyo Battle i will be insufferable.

#engeki haikyuu #haikyuu #haisute #hyper projection engeki haikyuu #haikyuu stage play #long post #REALLY LONG POST IM SO SORRY #Mango Goes To Jail #NO REALLY IT'S LONG

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macklives · 5 years ago

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session 81 end

wow, okay, first things first

AC!!!!!

shes so fucking cute holy shit i love her so much i dont even know where to begin??

i mean i guess its because im so used to troll snark and the way they just? banter constantly? seeing someone who is a literal ray of sunshine is so refreshing and wholesome and pure. god she’s great. shes a cat, she knows her stuff. she’s strong and theres also this guys???? who shes scared of?? and tells her what to do??? yeah no, idk who it is but let her make her own decisions lol

maybe its just over exaggeration or whatnot, and hes not bad but first impressions do a lot to me and right now the only thing i know about this guy is that AC needs his approval for everything. i guess ill see where that takes us. hopefully nowhere bad. but AC seems like she can take care of herself and knows how to be a good decent troll and i love her for that. wow it literally took me one dialogue to like her. damn, that was fast. jesus.

you know who else is great?

terezi.

yeah i know right. and that whole trial thing, which yeah i guess half the time i was confused by what the fuck is going on since i still cant grasp the idea of how alternia works, but i enjoyed myself with lemonsnout and how terezi roleplays and how much she gets into it. seeing a character that passionate about something is so sweet and nice.

god this was just a nice overall session

which i say, while i completely forgot about the banter TA and karkat got into

right, that happened. oh my god. they both literally stomped all over each other, dissed one another, still made up in the end because apparently thats their friendship and i guess it just works like that. depends on the friends you have, i guess.

its funny though, not gonna lie

and karkat as of now is just being a prick and honestly?

like more than usual, which i guess is weird to say but i mean from present time to beginning of hivebent karkat. not that its uncommon for him to be a prick, he is, but seeing him go through the non-linear pattern with john is mmmmh interesting to say the least. though we havent seen his first trolling, just him constantly going “oh god what did i say, i was dumb” u know, not in those words but thats basically what he means.

ooh im gonna analyze, i feel like analyzing right now my fingers have already typed so much as it is MIGHT AS WELL

and our candidate will be *drum rollll* karkat wow predictable (its below the cut because this is literally irrelevant now to the session)

okay, lets lay out the shit we have already. as i said before, the way he talks presently to john (meaning in the future) is so different than how he speaks to everyone now. of course the “i hate the world” personality is still there, and hes still just regular karkat, but karkat talking with john is patient to some extent and tells him what he needs to know for the game, lowkey kinda chills out once they started talking about movies or growing up as huh, didnt he say larvae or smth?

okay that whole grub thing makes sense now as i just wrote that but i am still confused as to what the FUCK that is implying because i dont think it crossed my mind this much, im repressing it for now until it comes up later.

anyways, back to what i was saying. he was so DIFFERENT than the way he’s acting now which is bitch and moan and like? stfu karkat lmfao. i mean, its not THAT big of a difference in character, because i know he’s still his grumpy old self, and theres a lot of potential.. for growth? not sure if we’ll get it but i like to assume we will get character growth from these characters with fucking 8000 pages talking about them. but a story needs that growth and with karkat being just a straight up angry dude, in MY EYES, he should.. have growth, no? idk HOW he will grow, but im basically just taking what i have right now which isnt much but i analyze things for fun sometimes so let me be.

that being said, because its so early on, im not sure where homestuck is gonna go and i dont have much to go on but being in the psychology course shit happens when you have limited information and you gotta pin point what makes a person a person and how do they cope with things to grow further into life. many of my assignments involve limited info so honestly, not that hard.

but it is something that ive noticed, the way karkat is different as he grows which possibly means the whole veil thing happens later later on in his life and we havent yet seen that small growth become patience and not whining every time he doesnt get what he wants. but growth is common and it mostly likely happens to everyone, so its not like wow this is a surprise and a plot twist, more of something that i just wanna write for the sake of writing it. i hope that makes sense? i dont exactly know where im going with this. i just mean that im basically going to analyse karkat a tiny bit so idk how to otherwise explain it but you’ll get where im going with this as i type more lmao.

anyways, so karkat literally said “pretend i dont think highly of my friend’s talents” as if he’s visibly trying to force himself from all emotions and bash on those who do (reference: “stop being sensitive, its repugnant” or whatever tf he said while TA replied with “hypocrite”) i take that as a key word. so honestly, while that was the smallest thing ive gotten from this session, its the thing im most curious about actually and i actually havent mentioned lol. because what ive learned in psych, which this is just common knowledge but i did an assignment on it so like?? could be useful?? is that people who hold off their emotions tend to hold off others as well, so there is no chance of mirroring each other. in other words, if someone is happy and starts to laugh and goof around with another, the emotions will mirror that other person subconsciously. like an addictive laugh. theres also another way to show mirroring, which is to mimic another person's actions, allowing another to establish a sense of empathy and thus begin to understand another person's emotions. in this case, im using TA and karkat as example. people who suppress emotions tend to see emotions as a bad sign and if somebody else portrayed any sign of it as well, they’ll basically say “gross what are you doing” because theyre so used to concealing it away, that they dont want others to think theyre into the whole mushy shit. so they pretend to hate it, pretend to not even be slightly affected by general sensitivity..

which basically means karkat is a softie, and even if he’s a prick right now, meeee thinks john, from earlier convos, is growing on him because john himself knows how emotions work and while i dont think troll culture does know much about it, considering the BLOOD AND CARNAGE thing, he is in fact growing and even if thats obvious, and you all know it, i am new to homestuck and am trying to see that for myself. its noticeable to some degree. he may always still be a jerk, but i am waiting to see how he slowly starts to accept things around him and to finally show what hes hiding inside. even if its just going up by a few percentages, i see its there and im hoping VERY HOPING he has the biggest character growth!

in other words, why else do i think this?? well nobody who watches romcoms can be that fucking aggressive. you need some sap in you to like it.

on that note, ill probably analyze alternia’s system and rules in another post later throughout these next few sessions because i feel it needs to be talked about and the way everything just.. is so different and doesnt seem right, you know?

thats it for now goodnight

#homestuck #homestuck liveblog #hs81 #hs81 end #tfw you get so into the analysis simple shit doesnt come to mind like tagging or putting a title

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ritualmichael · 5 years ago

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Alone Time - Hawthorne!Michael x Male Reader

back at it again with another hawthorne fic (psst, read High For This if you havent). italicized = flashback. lmk what you think!

warnings: mentions of student/teacher relationships, male receiving blowjob

word count: 3.9k-ish

(if you know whose gif this is, pls lmk!)

There was no such thing as peace and quiet at Hawthorne. With that many boys milling around the hallways and classrooms at all times of the day, it was hard to find a space where one could actually be on their own - especially when Michael Langdon was your roommate.

It had only been about fifteen minutes and Y/N was finally starting to relax and unwind from his long day, sinking further into his mattress with his back leaning against the wall, an old occult book in his lap. There wasn’t much else for him to do around Hawthorne, but he didn’t mind - he had actually gotten through a few shelves of books from the library by now. The leather covers and pages crisp from age were the best company he could find.

It wasn’t long before the door was pushed open and the sounds of the school poured into the still and quiet room briefly until it latched again, Michael closing it behind him. His roommate didn’t even look up from his book, hoping he could just ignore his new guest - which he was able to call him because Michael spent less time in his own bed than he did other’s, leaving his roommate by himself most nights. It seemed like tonight wasn’t going to be one of those nights.

“What are you studying?” Michael asked without actually greeting him, sitting down on the bed next to the boy and lifting up one of the sides of the book, craning his neck to be able to make out the title which made his roommate lose his place with a huff. Michael knew a lot of things about being a good warlock, but he definitely didn’t know much about personal space.

“Not studying, just trying to enjoy my alone time.” No matter how many hints he dropped, Michael never chose to pick up on them. “Why weren’t you in class earlier?”

The moment he finally looked up at Michael, his questions were answered. Dangling from his mouth was the white stick of a lollipop, his full lips red and tacky from the sweet candy. The first few buttons of his uniform shirt were opened, revealing a glimpse of his chest and collarbones. Y/N had to stop himself from staring at his soft skin and imaging the warmth of it beneath his lips again.

“I was in John’s office,” Michael said with a devious smirk, calling the man by his first name instead of John Henry Moore or, simply, Moore like the other students. “I was getting some extra help.”

He watched as Michael twisted the stick around in his fingers, his cheeks slightly hollowing as he sucked on candy. John Henry had a bowl of candy at the corner of his desk that no one ever touched, too nervous from being called into his office from what most assumed was to be chastised. Y/N figured it was just there to make his dark and bleak office seem more inviting.

Michael, on the other hand, spent a lot of time in the man’s office. Everyone already noticed, but walking through the halls with the lollipop dangling from his mouth, he was curing everyone’s curiousity. The undone buttons that gave the professor (and everyone else) a glimpse of what he was missing was a bit of a sign too. Michael Langdon lacked any kind of subtlety.

“Like you need extra help,” Y/N scoffed under his breath, looking back down at his book, aimlessly flipping through the pages. He couldn’t focus on any of the words, his senses already flooded with all things Michael.

“Just in a few ways,” Michael shrugged, leaning back and noisily pulling the lollipop from his mouth. He was so close that his roommate could smell the sugary treat on his breath.

“Right.” Y/N decided not to press any further, not being too keen on hearing the details about how Michael seduced the poor, lonely professors around Hawthorne. It was sickeningly easy for him and had become a hobby.

“Besides, he wasn’t much fun today.” There was a bit of a whine in Michael’s voice as he scooted closer, closing what little of a gap there was between them in the first place.

“So you decided to come here because?” Y/N said, his eyes drifting away from the pages of his book to Michael’s thigh that was now pressing against his own, trying his best not to squirm.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Was I interrupting something?” Michael retorted, cocking his head to the side and looking very unconvinced that Y/N could be doing anything better at the moment.

“No, I just-” he started to say but was quickly cut off when Michael grabbed the book that sat in his lap and dropped it to the floor, too quickly for Y/N to stop him.

“Exactly.” Michael sat back, slipping the lollipop back into his mouth. “What were you trying to do with that book anyway? Learn how to summon a boyfriend?”

Y/N rolled his eyes at Michael’s weak jab. “If that was the case, I could just ask you since you do it so well.” It was true, he couldn’t believe the amount of boys at that school followed Michael around like puppies who hadn’t been fed for days.

Michael chuckled under his breath, “I don’t need magic for a boy to get in my bed. They just… come.” He tilted his head, a smirk pulling on his lips.

Y/N watched the way that word just rolled off his tongue, causing his stomach to tighten and his breath to get caught in his throat. It was so filthy and familiar.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” Michael groaned and rutted up into Y/N’s hand, his head thrown back onto his roommates pillow.

Both of their bodies were sticky with sweat, Michael’s pants tugged just far enough down his thighs for Y/N to be able to pull his painfully hard cock from the confines of his boxers.

Their lips were swollen and spit-slick from messy, eager kisses. They were both drunk on their hunger for each other - desperate to just be close to someone, anyone, and to feel their body pressed against them, heaving for breath when it was stolen from each other’s lungs during sloppy kisses.

Y/N worked Michael’s cock skillfully (much to the blonde’s surprise, he didn’t realize his roommate was so experienced) until he was cumming all over his stomach and Y/N’s hand, his uniform shirt already unbuttoned and open to reveal his smooth skin.

Y/N couldn’t get the image out of his head for days of Michael laying in his bed, chest rising and falling with quick breaths, his wavy hair out of place and stuck to his forehead, eyes closed as if he was saying a prayer. “You’re full of surprises, roomie,” he remembers Michael saying, the same smirk on his face like the one now.

He didn’t realize how caught up he had gotten in his own thoughts, his eyes on Michael’s lips and the way he slowly pulled the dwindling lollipop from his mouth. Truthfully, he missed how Michael tasted and knew he’d be even sweeter now with the sugar on his lips.

“Open,” Michael whispered, their bodies close enough for Y/N to hear him clearly.

He did as he was told, wetting his lips with his tongue before parting them. Michael brought the pink candy to Y/N’s mouth, his blue eyes following as he slowly dragged it along his bottom lip, the tip of his tongue getting a taste as his mouth watered.

Cherry.

Michael eased the candy into the other boys mouth, amused at how eager he was to close his lips around it. Y/N ran his tongue over it, his mouth filling with the sticky, sweet flavor and he took the stick of the lollipop in his fingers, making it easier to suck on it.

“Still so easy, roomie,” Michael said teasingly, his voice low and calm.

Y/N rolled his eyes, trying to come off more frustrated than he actually was. Michael had power over him and no matter how hard he tried, he always failed to resist him. He knew that the only reason Michael was in their room right now is because he didn’t have someone else falling to their knees for him and Y/N was an easy target. Michael could give him one look or touch him in the slightest way and he’d be hypnotized, his whole body like putty in the blonde’s hands. He despised himself for being like that.

Michael quickly moved onto Y/N’s lap, his legs on either side of him and his hands going to the boy’s shoulders to steady himself. Raking one hand through his roommate’s hair, he used the other to gently tap on his chin and watched proudly as the boy opened his mouth on command, letting Michael gently pull the lollipop from between his lips. There was barely any candy left, but Michael slipped what remained into his own mouth again, his eyes never leaving Y/N’s flustered face. He hadn’t really gave the boy a good look until now. He liked the way he tried to avert his eyes and how he didn’t know where to put his hands.

“I’m glad I have someone like you to play with,” Michael said, his fingers still combing through the boy’s locks and he gently tugged his head back slightly, watching the way his jaw clenched beneath the skin.

“Only when you’re bored,” Y/N retorted, a little frustration slipping into his tone. He couldn’t tell if he was more annoyed with himself for feeling overwhelmed by Michael’s touch or the fact that Michael just saw him as a sort of play-thing - one of many, that is. He didn’t want to just be a number.

“If you want my company, all you have to do is ask.” Michael ran his free hand up Y/N’s chest, reaching his neck where his fingers traced over his throat, feeling as he thickly swallowed. “I can think of a lot of things that you could be doing besides sitting alone and reading old books.”

“You’re always busy with someone else.” Y/N silently cursed at himself for sounding jealous.

“Yes, but you’re more fun,” Michael hummed, tilting his head and easing the stick of the lollipop out of his mouth, the rest of the candy already dissolved on his tongue. He threw it toward the small trash can beside his roommate’s desk, barely giving it a glance to see if he made it in. “You try to resist me.” Leaning in, Michael nudged his nose against the boy’s jaw, watching the way goosebumps littered his skin when he felt his warm breath on him as he spoke. “And fail,” Michael murmed, nipping at his skin right below his ear (the spot that he knew drove anyone crazy) and Y/N let out a soft gasp, proving Michael’s point even more.

Michael chuckled softly at the boy’s sound, pulling away just enough so that he could watch the way he blushed and how his mouth hung open with eager breaths. Their eyes met and it was as if someone struck a match, fire roaring in both of them as they both lunged forward, crashing their lips into each others’ in a hungry kiss. Y/N melted into Michael, his hands finally finding a spot on his hips and digging his fingers into his uniform shirt as the blonde pulled himself even closer, their chests pressed to each other and Michael’s fingers getting lost in the boy’s hair.

He tasted like cherry. Y/N figured his own lips probably did too.

The kiss didn’t last long. It was intense, teeth clumsily knocking and tugging at lips, but it was brief. Michael was the one to pull away, chest already rising and falling quickly as he reached for the hem of the boy’s shirt, tugging it over his head and tossing it to the floor. Y/N leaned in again, eagerly trying to catch Michael’s lips in another kiss but he ducked away before he could, making him let out a groan.

“Somebody missed me,” Michael teased as his fingers expertly unbuttoned his uniform, revealing more and more of his skin - skin that Y/N wanted to get his mouth on and cover with marks and bites if Michael would let him.

“Just hurry up,” Y/N huffed, pushing Michael’s shirt off of his shoulders and leaning in, grazing his lips against his neck where there were fading marks left by previous lovers, once hidden by the pristine collar of his shirt. He nipped at one of the spots, almost healed and yellowed beneath the skin, listening to the soft hum that rose from Michael’s chest and vibrated against his own.

Michael loved watching the shift in Y/N. He’d go from being resistant and snarky to desperate and eager, wanting to be as close to Michael as he could instead of far away and ignoring his presence. There was still a bit of snappiness to him but he liked it. He didn’t just completely throw himself at Michael any chance he got, he made him work for it.

Completely tugging off his shirt and letting it fall to the floor, Michael grabbed Y/N by his chin, pulling him away from his neck and back into a rough kiss, his tongue pushing into the boy’s mouth without much resistance. It had been so long since they last kissed and it showed. Teeth were nipping at lips fervently, tongues tasting the left over sweetness from the treat they both shared, hands gripping and scratching bare skin.

Y/N wouldn’t admit it outloud, but while Michael was out exploring all the tastes that Hawthorne had to offer, all he ever tried was Michael. It wasn’t on purpose, but after their first time together like this, he knew that no one else would touch him the way Michael did and he didn’t want to test it out. He was satisfied with the random nights they spent together. He could focus on his studies without being majorly distracted by Michael’s plump lips and smooth skin every night.

But during times like these, Y/N threw any thoughts that didn’t pertain to Michael right out the window. His head was spinning and all he could think about was the boy who was on top of him and pushing him onto his back, trailing sloppy kisses over his jaw and down his neck. His roommate that he had once despised because he was messy and arrogant, who now had a thigh slotted between his own and was eliciting sounds from Y/N that no one else in the world had the chance to hear before. Everything revolved around Michael Langdon.

Y/N glanced down at the mop of blonde hair that was now out of place from his fingers combing through it, trying to catch his breath as Michael kissed down his chest. Every spot where he pressed his lips lit up with warmth, sending shocks to his spine and making him eagerly arch up into Michael’s kisses.

“I was selfish last time,” Michael mumbled against his skin, glancing up at him with those piercing blue eyes that were like no other. “I’m returning the favor.”

His words went straight to the other boy’s cock, a warm blush coating his face and he dropped his head back against his pillows with a soft “fuck”. The memory of Y/N’s hand wrapped around Michael’s length, getting him off with just his touch and a few soft whispers, came flooding back to his mind for the second time that night. Sure, Michael had made him cum before, but it was only ever through layers of clothes, rushed and overeager. He wasn’t expecting Michael to be so determined to make it up to him.

“You don’t have to,” Y/N breathed out, lifting his head and watching as Michael chuckled softly. God, he really wanted to kiss him again.

“You don’t mean that,” he said, running a finger along the prominent bulge in Y/N’s sweatpants, causing him to suck in a sharp breath at the touch.

Of course he meant it but he also wasn’t going to stop Michael from going further. Never had he truly touched him and he would be lying if he said he didn’t think about the blonde’s hands and wet mouth on him sometimes late at night, in the privacy of his own bed without any company.

Michael leaned down, planting wet kisses along the waistband of Y/N’s sweatpants before slipping his fingers into them, pulling them down the other boy’s legs. He let them join the other discarded clothes on the floor, quickly moving between his legs again and mouthing at his roommate’s thighs, giving him gentle bites and nips, just to watch the way he would desperately spread them even more.

“I thought you were more of a receiver than a giver,” Y/N breathed out, one arm bent and resting beneath his head as he watched Michael’s mouth worked against his skin.

The blonde chuckled, his warm breath fanning over the other boy’s skin and sending chills throughout his body. “What would be the fun in that?” He looked up at him as he spoke, his hands running along his thighs and feeling the muscles tense beneath his skin.

Y/N didn’t have an answer for him, mostly because he had hardly been on the receiving end of pleasure and because Michael had began to tug his boxers down his thighs, his cock hard, flushed and sensitive to the cool air.

“Fuck, roomie. Why have you been hiding this from me?” Michael mumbled at the sight of the boy’s cock, a groan coming from his throat as he wrapped his hand around his length, precum already slugging out from his sensitive tip and onto Michael’s knuckles.

Too distracted by the foreign feeling of someone else’s touch, Y/N couldn’t bring himself to reply but instead bit down hard on his bottom lip to suppress any embarrassing noises. His eyes fluttered closed as Michael started to pump his hand, missing the sight of him spitting into his fist to lubricate his movements.

It only took a few moments for the boy’s breathing to pick up and whimpers to draw themselves from his chest at Michael’s skillful movements of his hand. What Y/N didn’t expect was the wet warmth that suddenly enveloped the leaking head of his cock, glancing down to see Michael’s lips wrapped around him and his blue eyes looking up at him, half lidded and darker than he had seen them.

Reaching down, he slotted his fingers into Michael’s blonde hair and took hold of his locks between them. He wanted to push him all the way down and feel his length hit the back of his throat, but he was nowhere near brave enough for that.

Instead, Michael took his time. Running his tongue along the underside of the boy’s cock, languidly swirling his tongue around his tip, dragging his plump, slick lips against his skin just to tease. Y/N’s head was spinning - as would anyone’s while watching Michael work his mouth so skillfully.

When Michael finally started to lower his head onto his length, Y/N couldn’t suppress his sounds any longer. Moans spilled from his lips as he felt himself reach the back of Michael’s throat, feeling the way his muscles contracted as he willed himself not to choke (Michael was proud to not have a weak gag reflex).

The boy’s grip on Michael’s hair tightened as he started to bob his head, the obscene wet sounds and the blonde’s groans almost enough to send Y/N overboard. That familiar feeling started to seep throughout his body - warmth, electricity, euphoria.

“Why the fuck are you so good at this?” He groaned, throwing his head back and resisting the urge to buck his hips up into Michael’s mouth at the pace he truly wanted.

As if it were his response, Michael bobbed his head a few more times before drawing back and wrapped his lips around the boy’s throbbing head that was threatening to spill at any second. Wrapping his hand around his length again, he quickly pumped it while swirling his tongue - the perfect combination that was enough to draw a long, throaty groan from Y/N, his eyes squeezed shut as he came into his roommates mouth.

Pumping his hand through the boy’s orgasm, Michael swallowed with ease and pulled off of his cock messily, wiping his swollen, cum slick lips with the back of his free hand. He watched as Y/N started to come back, his jaw unhinged and his breathing still heavy.

“Okay, okay,” Y/N breathed out, squirming at Michael’s touch as he started to become sensitive. Laying there, his eyes exhaustedly shut and trying to catch his breath, he felt the weight shift on his bed and lost the feeling of Michael’s touch.

Opening his eyes, he watched as Michael stood beside his roommates bed and started to unbutton his uniform pants which he had yet to take off.

“Give me a minute, I don’t think I can-“ Y/N started to say tiredly as he pulled his blanket over his bare body but was quickly cut off.

“What?” Michael chuckled. “So you get to be the only one who is comfortable? These pants are terrible,” he said as he pushed them down his legs and let them pool on the floor. Y/N quickly realized that Michael didn’t have anymore provocative intentions and he let out a sigh of relief. He wasn’t sure if he could handle another orgasm that intense.

“Move over,” Michael said, pulling back the blanket of the twin sized bed as he climbed in next to the other boy. Reaching down beside the bed, he grabbed the book that he had taken from Y/N earlier and held it out to him.

“Here. Teach me something I don’t already know,” he said amusingly, receiving a playful eye roll from his roommate as he took the old book from him.

Y/N was anything other than annoyed though. Never had Michael stayed in his bed after their moments together like this and it made his cheeks and neck flood with a warm blush. There was hardly room on the small mattress for both of them, but he wasn’t complaining about being this close.

Letting the book fall onto the blankets, Y/N reached over for Michael instead. Resting his hand on his cheek, he leaned in and connected their lips before he could think twice about it. If there was ever a moment to go with his gut feeling, he knew that now was probably it. He didn’t know the next time he’d have the opportunity.

Michael reciprocated, kissing him back but this time it was more gentle, no need to rush or be forceful with each other. Michael pulled Y/N closer, his bare body flush against Michael’s, and they stayed like that for what could’ve been a few minutes or an hour. They weren’t keeping up, just getting lost in the gentle feeling of each other’s lips and tongues.

Pulling away slightly and nudging his nose against the boy’s, Michael mumbled, “What was that for?”

“I’m returning the favor,” Y/N said quietly, quoting Michael from earlier and receiving one of his famous, devilish smiles. The next moment they were back to kissing, hands exploring each other and legs tangled up with each other’s beneath the blankets, wanting to stay like that for the rest of the night.

tags: @dudesorriso @silkyhoneybaby @avesatanaslangdon @lucifer-owns-this-pussy @sodanova @wastelandkitties @heelsamizayn @lovely-langdon @langdonpilots @cryptid-coalition @cherryberryann @omnipotentdemoness @marzipan-romanoff @featherpool-852 @slasherloversposts @wroteclassicaly @01-800-mary @mcenziehughes @kylolangdon @kinlovecody @sammythankyou @antichristinq @queencocoakimmie @lathraios @venusxxlangdon @lvngdvns @avesatanormalpeoplescareme

#michael langdon #michael langdon x reader #ahs #fanfic #michael langdon fanfiction #fanfiction #michael langdon x male reader #male reader #duncan shepherd #jim mason #hawthorne!michael

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quokkalatte · 4 years ago

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I havent posted on here for awhile but I wanted to talk ab something that's been on my mind recently and I've been dwelling on it a lot lately. And it comes to supporting a friend, when they tell you they have a crush on someone.

When your friend approaches you, whether it be through text, face time, or face to face, and they tell you that they have a crush on someone, you want to be supportive right? You want to tell them "ooo ask them out then!" Or something along those lines. And if they get nervous about it, and are scared that their crush will reject them, do not say "what's the worst that could happen? Theyll reject you?"

Becuase yes. Rejection IS a worst case scenario. It might not seem big. Your crush not liking you back, so you pick yourself up and move on. Or at least that's how some people would view it. But the thing is, if you dont know a person's history when it comes to romantic interest, saying something like that can be damaging.

As I've grown up, and developed crushes on people, and when I would confide in friends, that's normally how the conversation would go. They get giddy and excited, and tell me I should ask them out. And that was okay, but over time, it wasnt. Because every. Single. Time. I would get rejected. My first crush on a boy was in elementary school. And ever since two months ago, every time I told a boy I liked them, they would reject me, often in a cruel manner.

When a freind of mine would say "the worst they can do is reject you" I would get this feeling in my stomach, and I would always think "exactly. That's the exact WORST thing that could happen. Becuase rejection hurts, and it affects others differently.

There are those who can just pick themselves up and move on. No harm no foul. But for people like me, those experiences stick to you and morph you.

Hitting Middle school, the rejection got worse. I had three small crushes in the span of three years. And every single one had found out. When I told them, they looked at me funny, and would leave to their group of freinds. And they would tease me. And laugh at me becuase I was different. I wasnt the skinny pretty little girls like the others in my class. And it was around that time I'd realised that. After the first two, there was a third. This experience is probably where alot of my issues resolved. And it was only 6th grade.

I didnt even tell him that I'd liked him, a classmate found out and told him during recess. We were waiting in line to go back inside for class, and the school I went to we had uniforms. Mine always fir tightly becuase I was bigger than most of the girls in my class. I remember I was wearing my favorite blue jacket and the khaki pants we were required to wear. When the classmate ran over to the boy I'd liked, he'd pointed at me and told him. The boy turned and looked at me, and got the most disgusted look on his face, and shouted "EW!" Before walking away. I proceeded to get upset. The classmate approached me, and in a pitting manner told me he didnt think that my crush would react that way. The girls I were freinds with said horrid things about the boy I'd liked, but the only thing that I could think of was the look of disgust on his face at the simple thought that I'd had a crush on him.

And it stuck with me. It still does. Containing through high school I became more reserved when it came to the guys I liked. I never told my friends who my crushes were, and when they outed me about it, that's all they wanted for me to do was to tell him. Tell him becuase what's the worst that could happen? He could reject me?? Yes. Becuase in my mind, I was ugly. I was undeserved of every having a boyfriend. And I was convinced I would never have one. I would look in the mirror and loath what I saw. I hated how I looked becuase all I could see were what they saw. I wore hoodies all the time even in hot weather so that I could cover my arms. I didnt want any of me showing. I wouldnt wear shorts becuase I hated how big my legs were. I held so much self loathing for myself, I wouldnt look in a mirror for longer than I had to.

That had gone on for years. I've hated myself for years becuase of judgment. Because I feared what people thought of me. It didnt just extend to what I thought the boys thought, but everyone thought. I hated attention being attracted to me, and my social anxiety got worse. Anything that brought attention to me would make my heart pound and my palms sweaty and my head buzzing with a hundred thoughts that made it so difficult to function.

It was only recently in the past couple years I've been able to accept myself. And I'm still very far off. And it might sound dumb or cliche, but the only reason that sparked this, was kpop. My friend introduced me to BTS, and I got invested in them. I loved them. I loved these 7 boys, who radiated such happiness and positivity. Their concept of loving yourself for who you are, and that the closest to you would do the same, those words meant alot to me. They helped me when I was anxious. Their music was, and still is, so soothing to me.

In my Senior year of high school I was taking my health elective, and we were learning about the BMI and to test what ours was. I refuse to share what my results were, but they werent healthy. As the teacher droned on about the topic, I sat in the back of the class quietly crying and trying to get myself to stop but I couldnt, and I felt a panic attack coming on, and I was scared that I would bring attention to myself, so I needed to distract myself from it, and I plugged my earbuds in and pulled up a BTS video. It was just a 2 minute video of Jimin laughing, and that was enough. I calmed down enough to collect myself, and I stopped crying.

Two years later I'm still not perfect. I still have a very toxic mentality of myself, and I can accept that I might need help, more than what KPOP groups can give me. They did give me the tiniest of nudges to help me, and I am very grateful.

I've told you what you shouldnt say to someone when they tell you that they have a crush on someone, so here's what you COULD say.

Your friend is worried, that their crush might reject them. You can offer your support.

"I'm here for you. I hope it works out, and I'm sure it will. And if not, I'll be here to help you"

"I understand you're scared, I see why you are. You dont have to tell them unless you're ready. I'm in your corner if you need me"

Motivate your friend in a good way. Dont pressure them into it, becuase it can make them anxious and stressed because they feel like they HAVE to tell their crush, and it makes it worse on them. Encourage your freind to get to know their crush. Tiny things, speaking to them. And if their scared about that, reassurance will help them. Offering advice and tips on what they could say and do will help them.

This is my last personal story to pair with this. I developed a crush on a guy. We met through a mutual freind, one who happens to be a very good friend of mine. I got his snapchat, and since then we've talked every day since. I didnt realise that I'd had feeling for him until a month into just chatting, and I started to wonder if he felt the same. The select few people i told all told me that it was possible, and they believed that all the signs he gave me were pointing towards yes, he did like me. I was still unsure, so very unsure.

My best friend is who helped me the most. I told him about a week after I found out my crush on this boy, and he was immediately supportive. He never once said to me "worst case scenario he rejects you". He told me o should talk to him more, get to know this boy and see what happened. My feelings became stronger every passing day. This boy made me so happy, and he was unlike any of my past crushes. I was so used to the guys I liked wanted nothing to do with me, or if they actually DID, it wasnt becuase of me, but because they wanted nudes. The few experiences I'd had with guys before this boy were awful. I had been talking to a guy but all he cared about was sex and nothing else and ignored me for a month, and then proceeded to ask for nudes becuase he was horny. It was very damaging for my mental state, and I was in a rough place. Id cried to my best freind, begging for him to tell me what was wrong with me. Why boys didnt reciprocate my feelings, and when they showed even the slightest of interest it was because they were horny. I felt like I would never find anyone ever.

I was scared, after developing feeling on this boy. I told my freind the same stories I've shared here. How I was terrified of being rejected. Becuase I'd gotten to know this boy and felt more for him than what freinds normally would. My best friend was so supportive, he stood by me when I would get anxious and when I would tell him my fears and doubts.

It took me 3 weeks to gett the courage to tell this boy that I liked him. The day I told him my nerves were shot, my palms were slick, but I did it. I confessed to this boy that I liked him. Funny enough, it was through a meme. It said that "I might have a big fat crush on you but I'm scared to say anything" my nerves were on fire my body was numb. It might sound like an exaggeration but this was how I was feeling. I was texting all three of my supportive freinds at once. My best freind was the first to know, he was with me through the entire time I talked to my crush. My crush had asked why I was scared to tell him, and I'd told him that I didn't want to make him uncomfortable becusse we'd grown close in the time we were talking. He reassured me that I couldnt make him uncomfortable. I'd asked how he felt about me. At this point my heart was in my throat. I watched the icon that showed he was typing and I was ready, I was ready for him to reject me, like all the boys had done before.

But he told me he felt the same. He didnt reject me. He was worried becuase we live so far apart from each other, and we werent sure how long distance would do for us, and how Covid19 would take into play. But I'd said I was up to try if he was, and he was too.

That was two months ago as of writing this. But if it wasnt for my best friend being so supportive of me, I dont think I could ever have told my boyfriend that I liked him. Even now, the concept is foreign to me. My trauma is still apparent becuase I cannot fathom how someone as amazing as him likes me back, after years of getting rejected and my mental health being damaged by the countless teasing. The first time he called me beautiful, I broke down and cried, because it felt too good to be true.

I'm sharing this, I'm sharing my experiences becuase i wanted to help people know how they could help a friend who might share similar experiences with me, get through the fear of rejection. Telling someone their worst case scenario doesnt help ease their worries. But offering your support, and reassuring them that it would be okay and that you will be there for them will.

Rejection is a part of life, and its something you cannot really control. But if the right words can help you get over your fear of it, then it does help ease the pain.

I'm not saying that all my past friends who told me rejection was my worst case scenario were trying to be malicious, they just wanted me to be happy and were excited for me. I understand that.

And if you ever were that friend who said that, it doesnt make you a bad friend. You were trying to help in your own way. But this may help for future interactions, or at least I hope it will.

You dont always know the experiences that your freinds go through, but being there and supporting them through their fears will help them, and give then confidence.

My best freind has supported me through so much, and it was him who helped me overcome one of my biggest fears.

I hope you found this extremely long PSA to be helpful and I hope I explained myself the best I could. If something is unclear to you please tell me I want to help everyone I can, because I beleive you all deserve to be happy.

And no of course you dont need a partner to be happy. You can be strong and independent in your own way and find your happiness there.

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fuck-customers · 5 years ago

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My store is a dumpster fire waiting to explode

So this story has been one that has been slowly building over the sevenish months that I have been there, so this is going to be a very very long one, I apologize in advance. TLDR at the bottom.

I'm writing this cause I saw a recent submission about a p**s****, and just... need to get this off my chest.

So we opened this store late last year, and I was absolutely ecstatic at the time. The job had gotten me out of 45+ hours food service job which had left me emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted, and it was working with pets, so obviously it has to be great right? Well not so much.

It started out okay, I liked the people I worked with, but from the start we had issues. It was clear that there was (and is to this day) a breakdown in communication between managers and the different shifts. The people who trained me (as a shift leader who has the authority to open or close the store) were from outside, and apparently didnt do a very good or thorough job. For months after that the manager or assistant manager would say that I was doing something wrong, or forgetting to do something which I had never been shown or even told to do at all. Has this gotten better in the last seven months? No, it has not. In fact I am still not fully trained for the position I am supposed to be in, and was barely half trained for most of it. But I wasnt even the worst off, because the assistant manager at the time, N, wasnt fully trained either.

Now that might not be a big problem during the first few months, everything is still shaking down and people are getting settled, right? Well turns, out corporate needs our store manager, Ill call her R, to manage TWO STORES, at the same time. 2 hours apart from each other. So store manager splits her time between my store, and the store two hours away which ends up in a four hour commute for her because -- guess what-- they dont even pay her for a hotel. So now the store is managed by the not fully trained assistant manager.

During those few months where R was gone, I had a rough time. Money was missing several times from drawers or safe, things weren't getting done the way they were supposed to, daily paperwork wasnt signed, and R blamed me and the other shift leader, A, for not doing things the way they were supposed to be done. Except we were never originally told how things were supposed to be done.

Well R finally hires a manager for the other store she was helping to manage and comes back to discover that the store is in chaos. On the outside everything looked fine, but all that paperwork that hadnt been done correctly? It had built up to months worth of issues that needed to be corrected, and she was behind on everything.

Around that time she finally realizes that the problems we were having werent my or A's fault. It was the assistant manager N. Turns out, she would show up for work and just sit and do NOTHING. Basically expecting the closing people, aka me and A, to do everything that needed to be done. And the stuff that apparently only she knew how to do (because she hadnt trained me or A even though it was also something we were supposed to be doing), was getting delayed by several days. All while she left exactly when her shift was up, got there late in the mornings, and generally was just sketchy about work over all. A and I believe that that money that went missing several times was her doing as well, because after she left, it magically stopped happening.

But since R and N were friends, there was no consequence. In the end, me and A basically had to make up for all the missed work on N's side, because R refused to fire her. She wrote her up a few times, had some "discussions," but eventually N left on her own. It came out after she left that N was a compulsive liar, who had told lies to just about everyone at the store, from tiny ones to massive ones.

So now the store had lost the (half-trained) assistant manager, and we still had to fix all of her messes. So R decides to promote A (which is good, A is a great worker and more experienced than I am) to assistant manager. At this point I was hopeful that everything would calm down and start to settle.

Surprise. That didnt happen.

Instead our store manager got PROMOTED, to a sort of district manager. So then she was only going to be at our store for TWO DAYS of the entire week. She had just made A assistant manager, so she had barely any training, even though they did some speed training for a week or two.

At this point I still wasnt even trained to take in shipments, meaning the only two people in the entire store who could process incoming freight were R and A, even though we get daily shipments. We were still trying to fix the issues and things left behind by N. It was an absolute nightmare.

But it still gets worse. Because thats when we learned that one of our associates was leaving at the end of the month. I dont begrudge her for it, but it put a squeeze on everyone. Because despite common sense where if you lose someone you hire someone new to replace them, that didnt happen. We started with about 7 total workers, four of which were management, three of which were cashiers. We had lost one of the cashiers early on, N was gone, and R was there two days a week (most of which was her panicking about paperwork and store stuff), and we were about to lose another cashier. But still R hadnt hired anyone new. And after the one cashier left, our last remaining cashier let us know she would be leaving as well.

Of course, R panics. At that point she was down to four workers, including herself, and one of them about to leave. She finally starts the hiring procedures, but because she is so busy, it takes her WEEKS to hire anyone.

For about a month, it was basically me and A running the store. they scheduled me at 39 hours (so they wouldnt have to pay me for full time), and expected me to cover any shifts people called out, or come in early, or stay late. I was (and currently still am) the only shift leader for the store. And I am STILL not fully trained.

About two weeks ago, R finally hires some people. One of them literally quits after two days, and then she suddenly starts hiring a bunch of people. So now we have four new people we have to train, one of which they decided after a week would be a shift leader. But because she hired all of these new people at once, she's cutting my hours to 20 hours or less. So after all my hard work, after all my sticking through, I havent gotten a raise, and instead my hours have been drastically cut, and it doesnt look like R has learned anything at all.

I dont even think I would realize how bad it is, if it werent for the fact that R has had to beg help from other stores. And those from the other stores, would ask me questions about the store, about things that needed to be done which I couldnt answer. They looked at me in complete surprise and befuddlement, because it was simple things, basic things which I should know. But dont.

There is honestly, so much more that I cant even begin to start going through because its such a f***** mess. I was trained how to open the store over the phone, and trained on things at most once or twice with supervision before sent off to figure it out alone. I still have questions because I havent been fully trained after SEVEN MONTHS. I've been scheduled outside of my availability multiple times, and have covered all but two shifts I have been asked to cover, even though the ONE day I asked if someone could cover me cause I was so sick I could barely talk no one took my shift. There is so much confusion because there is no communication between shifts, I walk in after a few days completely unaware of whats happening or needs to be done. I dislike calling R whenever there are issues because she always snaps when she answers the phone and tries to get off as soon as possible and I feel like Im an inconvenience.

So yeah, Im done. I have been for months but Ive been trying to stick it out as long as I could. But Ive put in my notice, and Im hoping to find something better. At least now I know what red flags to look for.

TLDR: Corporate keeps putting way too much on store manager, it trickles down to literally everyone and everything in the store, no one can fix it and now all but one person who opened the store are leaving.

#submissions #fuck retail #fuck managers #submission

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nomorevanillabeanicecream · 5 years ago

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no more vanilla bean ice cream

they were out of vanilla bean ice cream, they had vanilla, french vanilla, sweet cream vanilla and cheesecake vanilla, but not vanilla bean, when did everyone all of a sudden get into vanilla bean, everyone was a pig they could not care less about the bean in the vanilla or not, but now apparently everyone was into vanilla bean ice cream because last week there was a full row of umpqua vanilla bean ice cream and now there was none

so I’m waiting in line at safeway with my subpar vanilla ice cream after I had gone on a much needed quarantine run right after spending two hours texting my friend and she was telling me about how google owns all the data in the world and not only has enough data to know me better than myself, but since they know everyone else’s data too, they know my friends data so they know me in context, the whole thing was very depressing so depressing i didnt even want to use a period in my writing anymore because what the fuck was the point of punctuation anyway in this world, i would still be nice and use commas, just to give my fingers a break and be able to get a thought in or so.

i guess i could also accommodate for paragraphs break at visually appropriate times, it didn't matter if it was contextually appropriate or not, i was going to drop a paragraph break because i know people like paragraphs, charles dickens and dostoevsky and jane austen and leo tolstoy never made paragraph breaks that's why no one ever read their books, people just say they read them to seem smart but they never really read them they just knew it was the right thing to say that they were literary geniuses because their books were so long, see people like to lie and say they know the work of a great author even though they only read a few quotes by them, but that was enough to say good and bad things about writers without ever knowing what the hell they did, few understand the theory of relativity but everyone calls einstein a genius.

the thing about quarantine was that at this point i had gotten used to seeing very few people in my life and i was enjoying it so whenever i had to go to the supermarket i had to see all these people and boy were they gross, maybe i would not have seen them as so gross if had gotten my vanilla bean ice cream but i had not so, they were gross, they were all getting so fat, and fat in like weird ways, not like fat on the sides like the michelin tire guy or a cute belly like the pillsbury dough boy or like that kinda funny superfat like homer simpson or peter griffin they were just gross fat, like it looked like they had just been eating garbage and watching netflix fat, like this one guy seemed like if you got a pillowcase filled it up with hot lard and then poked two pool cues on the bottom of it, this other lady looked like a minifridge emptied into a potato sack.

the asses were the worst part, it was kinda hot so everyone was wearing shorts and it was not appropriate when they wear shorts always have that like red line right under the shorts and it does not look that great, the oddest one was the skinny ass but with fat legs, i did not get that one, the person would have no ass mass at all but then the legs were super fat i did not understand what they were doing to get their bodies to look this way, a lot of people were also walking around with wedgies, a lot of people were also walking around in pajamas covered in animal hair and it was gross, its like you have nowhere to go, you are all complaining about not having the right to go out, so when you do go out why not maybe spruce things up, honour life, honour your fellow human, no, screw that we are all going to behave like the whole entire public sphere is a big ass pijama party,

the whole facemask thing, wait before, i start talking about the facemask thing, everytime i start a new paragraph, google is trying to force me into capitalizing the first letter, it doesn't even ask me if i want to capitalize it, it just goes ahead and does it, google is such an presumptuous douche sometimes, now when i write in gmail, it autocompletes all my sentences, great so we can all sound like robots, and it does it like automatically, so i ending having to erase the lame sentence it wrote, i mean i would have probably come up with something similar or exactly the same too, after all there are only so many ways to say goodbye, but id like to think it was my idea, these engineers had no savoir faire, just so you know, so now i hope that everytime you start to read a new paragraph you imagine me hitting the backspace button to delete their fascist capital letters, and its frustrating because im really trying to write as fast as i can, i bet you can tell

see it happened again, and its not that i just have to hit the delete, i have to get my mouse and put my cursor there so it like detects its not just on mistake i am trying to delete their smartass capital letter, so yeah to the facemask thing, the whole facemask thing was pretty dumb, i mean if the facemask was the windshield to the coronavirus i didnt get how casual people were being about, they would just pull it right down under their noise, oh great now you have all your coronavirus on your nostrils, what the hell, i didnt get it, im pretty sure noone in that safeway store had coronavirus, and it was coronavirus not covid19, what is it about us having to find dandy little names for things, it was the coronavirus and thats that, so yeah we were all carrying about these facemasks that if they were really protecting us from the coronavirus lingering in the air then we were being flagrantly irresponsible in our use, but deep down we all felt it wasnt, but we just had to wear one because it was the rule, but we all knew noone in the store had coronavirus

it may sound weird, but i think you know when someone has coronavirus, its like you can just tell, you know like other things you can just tell about a person, i remember i once went up to san francisco about a month ago, and i saw this guy on the muni line headed to the bayview that for sure had coronavirus, he wasnt coughing or anything, but i saw him and i knew he definitely had coronavirus, it wasnt because he was black or chinese or anything, this isnt like a hidden racist joke, i could just tell, i freaked out , and i havent gone up to the city since then, and then, lo and behold they announced that a muni driver got the corona and that the bayview district had the most corona cases in the cities, see sometimes you can just tell

im pretty sure that day i even had the corona on me, i mean i didnt get it, but im pretty sure it landed on my hand, but i washed it before i touched any of my mucous parts, but it was there with me, i dont think it was from the guy on the bus thought, i think it landed from this other guy, i went to a deli to buy water, bananas, coca cola and chocolate and this guy was kinda drunk and talking real loud and coming real close and i could feel the air get really moist when he passed by me and my hand was exposed and i know that at that moment some of it got on my hand, but i didnt panic, i knew i couldnt lose my cool, i had to just play it smooth, and wait till i could get to the studio and wash my hand and everything else, i was really thorough i walked the whole way back to the studio with my hand outstretched so it wouldnt touch my jacket or anything, i could feel it was there, it was for sure there, but i played it cool and washed it and nothing happen, but i was that close

and thats why you have to wash your hands because you could be that close too to having coronavirus, so see im not that crazy, that the reason they recommend us all to wash our hands, because at some point it could be that close to you, and if you don't wash your hand before your touch your eye, boom you got coronavirus, crazy to think that you too could have had coronavirus on you, and you could have, but now i think there isnt that much coronavirus on things anywhere, i think the coronavirus is like hiding or something, i think the coronavirus are like finding their niches and stuff, like if you ask me i think the coronavirus right now is probably somewhere where the sun dont shine, i bet it like flew to a a dirty dive bar that was totally shut down windows boarded and everything, but its there just chilling on the sticky counter, waiting to come back in the summer, i also think it might be at like some nasty to-go food place, like there is this wing place open till midnite around my house, i bet there is a little coronavirus there, but only a little bit, and its like one of the lazy ones, so i dont think it feels like jumping on anyone

at work i have to tell the staff how to wash their hands, i tell them they have to wash on top of their hand, palm of their hand, each finger, in between fingers, under the finger nails, and up to the elbow, but i mean if they have coronavirus, and their touching my food, i think its going to get on the to go box anyway, but its the rules so i play along, i even translated the rules, and told them to sign a paper, the paper also said that they had to wear a facemask, its not like they have multiple facemasks, i mean we are going to give them a few, but its up to them to wash it, one guy asked me if he could use the same one for a few days, i told him no, but i mean even if he washes his facemask before work and then lets say he puts it in his pocket, what if his jacket has corona but his facemask doesnt, itd be a real shame if his corona jacket infected his noncorona facemask, but i saw him and i dont think he had corona anyway

im repeating the same point and the rant is losing steam, so i gotta ramp it back up, or maybe no, maybe its not all just about ranting, maybe i should tell you some good things, like ill tell you about my run, the day was so nice, it was bright and sunny, and thats really all i gotta say, the point that i have more to say about right now is that i feel like im writing like that kid from catcher in the rye, that kid was a real case, i cant say i disliked the kid, but i wouldnt hang out with him, i mean in general i wouldnt be hanging out with high schoolers, but i might hang out with him after he grows up, i think we were all like that kid at some point, and the ones that arent, are soul dead and just go to work and drink craft beer and probably become those engineers without savoir faire that figure out the code to finish my email sentences

but i also feel that i am writing likes james joyce in ulysses, those are two books that i read from cover to cover ulysses and catcher in the rye, all it takes is a good fucked up guy to write something honest and you can get me to finish it, james joyce was all about stream of consciousness, crazy to think that ulysses is regularly named the best book of the century, and it wasnt even that bad of a century for books, it was a crazy book, and it was daring and new to just expose how he felt a person thought, and i mean it was pretty smart, because that is how we think, we jump around and we get nervous and self conscious and horny and we think in simple letters, and our memories associate things weirdly, i mean dante was the best writer of all the time, but i dont know anyone that thinks inside their brain in metered stanzas, if there was such a person, i dont know if id like to meet him, it would be a lot to handle good novels have taught me a lot, they've confused me too, but overall taught me things, see life is a grey thing, like there arent absolute values,

for us human beings, its easy to think of things as black and white, good and bad, yes or no, but thats not how it goes, there is a lot of grey area, and thats why i guess i liked ulysses, see the whole book is about this guy that is roaming around dublin, while he knows his wife is cheating on him, the last chapter is a stream of consciousness from his wifes mind, in which she just goes through her mind thinking about her past lovers and this guy she is cheating on her husband with, and ultimately she feels bad and when her husband climbs back into bed with her, shes like thinking oh there he is again, old leopold, but hes my leopold and she i guess kinda does admit to loving him, life hurts like that sometimes, a woman can still love you but cheat on you, a man can do it too, anyone can cheat on you, but still love you, anyone can hurt you and still love you, its a rough reality, remember i wrote an essay on this book, and the teacher said that i should save it and give it to the woman i marry it was so good, i didnt save it so i guess that wont ever happen, i cant even remember what i said, probably something about forgiveness and the abstract beauty of love, i was only twenty, i could have said anything

i wish i could remember what i wrote though, nowadays a lot of people are walking around with fear of intimacy issues, they are scared to open up to people, you know a lot of people are saying that they have intimacy issues, so i wanted to figure out more, i looked it up on wikipedia and it said there were four types of people, normal people that love themselves and can share intimacy with others, people that think themselves unworthy of intimacy but seek it, people that are scared of being intimate with others out of fear of rejection, and people that have self worth but think others are undeserving of intimacy, i think the whole thing probably comes from parental stuff, that's always the freudian way of looking at things, its kind of a shame because i think people really do like laying in bed and talking comfortably with someone after a wild fuck, when i wrote the essay i didnt have intimacy issues, but i might now, i dont know, and even if i did i dont know what type of of person i am, i guess sometimes people do say some stupid things, and stupid things out of a naked person are the worst kind of stupid things, whatever its wikipedia, anyone could have written, just like the original science study it supposedly based on,

ok this all getting too gooey and it lost its sharp vibe, i think that we were on a roll, when we were on the coronavirus landing places part, but then i get too serious and stuff, i do still want to talk about books i like, you know like thats one of the favorite things english teachers like to do, they like to analyze all the references that an authour made to other books, normally its the bible or the odyssey or some other greek or roman classic, like ulysses was modeled after the odyssey, i remember the teacher always talked about that, ive never read the odyssey or the iliad, ive heard they are great books, but i try not to say it myself, i do say that homer was a great poet though, but i never read his stuff, i mean ive read the first line, but i dont know the whole story or anything, i guess we are all hypocrites at some point or another, i do know however that ulysses was in one of dantes circles of hell, because he was advisor to deceit, the deceit of having that big horse full of soldiers go into to troy, so he ended up in hell, talking about hell that was another book they loved to reference, the bible, the bible doesnt see things grey, they see it black or white, this morning i woke up at four in the morning, and i couldnt get back to bed, so i pulled to a random spot and started reading proverbs, they make it seem so simple, this is good, that is is bad, i wish it were that simple, it used to be that simple like that when i was little kid, maybe it still is but, i just refuse to see it that way

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jawnjendes · 5 years ago

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the truth hurts but secrets kill | shawn mendes

chapter 8/?, university au, shawn x goth oc

AN: lol the taglist didnt work on my last chapter so if you havent read but i’ll show you my teeth pls do eet. anyways this chapter is an angsty buildup full of angst. my specialty.

***let me know if you wanna be added/removed from the taglist

masterlist | playlist coming soon

"Where do you live?" Annalise asked for what felt like the thousandth time.

"Do you even think she's capable of answering?" Patrick said, his arm supporting Alessia's waist as he helped her stumble down the university road.

The Lyft to campus went without any major issue. Alessia did not puke in the car, she merely leaned against the door in the backseat. Annalise had gotten annoyingly chatty with the driver, talking about childhood trauma and the inevitability of death. She claimed it was practice for when she's a real therapist, though the driver was trying to focus on the road. Patrick left the driver a generous tip through the app.

The three of them were left just close enough to the dorms, but there was still a walk to be had, and it felt like it was taking centuries with how much Alessia slowed them down. Annalise kept looking around at the dark surroundings as they paced with her pocket knife in hand. Alessia mumbled something incoherent, her head lolling from side to side.

"I've never heard of that building, where is it?" Annalise asked her.

"Dude, you're gonna have to take her back to your place," Patrick told her. "I don't even think she knows her own name."

With a reluctant sigh, Annalise closed her pocket knife and wrapped her arm around the smaller girl's waist. They were approaching the corner where she and Patrick would typically part ways. Alessia noticed the shift and leaned all her weight into Annalise, mumbling under her rancid breath. It wasn't her first time babysitting a drunk toddler, but that doesn't mean she likes doing it.

Patrick was kind enough to walk the two girls up to Annalise's dorm. Alessia was swaying ominously in the elevator, like she wanted to be cradled like a baby. She was definitely ready for bed.

"Ya casi, mi vida," Annalise said as they stumbled down the third floor corridor.

"Why do you call her that?" Patrick asked. "’Me veeda.’ Isn't that what you would call your boyfriend?"

"It's the same thing as a waitress would call you sweetie or something," she replied. "Or the way you'd talk to a toddler. A drunk one."

She managed to pull her key from her back pocket and give it to Patrick. He unlocked the appropriate door, and the three of them were met with more people and more loud music.

Apparently, Stella hadn't planned on staying alone this Saturday night. She was on the armchair, with Camila squished in right next to her. They weren't alone, either. Shawn and Brian were on the couch, each holding a beer. All four of them stared at the two goths holding the short normie up on two feet.

"Oh my god, you're right on time!" Stella exclaimed. "Shawn's working on an EP! He's giving a us a preview! And he made another duet with Camila!"

"Este guey se puso peda," Annalise said with mild snark, gesturing to the girl on her arm. "I'm gonna put her down."

"You're gonna kill her?" Patrick asked, his blue eyes wide. "Damn, I didn't know you hated her that much!"

"Shut up, I brought her here, didn't I?"

She did not look at the guests on the couch as she carefully led Alessia to her bedroom. She ignored Patrick starting up a conversation with everyone. She had things to do, and it was hard enough with her fluffy mind racing.

"There we go, my dear," she said as she sat the intoxicated girl on the bed. "Acuestate, mija. Tomorrow's gonna suck, but you can rest now."

She patted Alessia's head before moving to take off her sneakers. Then, Annalise took her phone from her jacket pocket and plugged it into the charger on then nightstand. Before she could sigh in relief that they all made it back alive, she heard a voice at the door.

"Hey, you."

When Annalise turned to face him, it was like a million fireworks went off at once. Her entire body froze in the best way, and the air in her lungs was knocked out of her. He's even prettier in person.

"Someone have too much fun?" he asked, nodding towards the now sleeping Alessia.

Annalise could not tear her eyes away from his face long enough to think of an answer. All she wanted to do was stare at him for the rest of eternity.

Then, Patrick came up from behind Shawn, an amused grin on his face. "Bro, she's high as a kite right now."

Shawn looked confused for a moment and then turned to him. "Ann doesn't smoke."

"She used to all the fucking time last year." Patrick was still grinning. "She wanted to have fun tonight, so I gave her a hit of my pen."

"So you drugged her up, eh?"

"Bro-"

"I'm not your bro. Don't you care about her health at all? Don't you remember she was in the hospital a couple of months ago?"

The grin faded. "I care about her and her freedom. Not that I have to explain that to you." Patrick excused himself.

Annalise heard every word, but her wide eyes were still on Shawn. She was stepping towards him before she even realized, and then her arms were going around his middle. He was still warm and soft and he smelled good. It was like personified crack. Annalise smiled as her head rested on his chest. "I love you, my baby."

Shawn hesitated, but he hugged her back. "Love you too." Then he pulled back, his hands on her shoulders. "Where are you gonna sleep?"

"The couch." Annalise's fingers were gripping the back of his t-shirt.

"You sure? Wouldn't you rather come stay with me? I'm leaving soon anyway."

Annalise giggled so much her voice squeaked. But she frowned almost instantly. "Don't be like Chad."

"Who's Chad?"

"No one important. I think sober Annalise is gonna be mad at you."

"What? Why?"

She pointed to the sleeping girl on the bed. "That one told high Annalise some things. Sober Annalise might not even remember, but if she does, she'll probably talk to you on check in day. Like, actual talking this time."

"Why can't we talk now?" Shawn asked. "I think high-you will be more understanding than sober-you."

"High Annalise is stupidly in love with you. We'll get nowhere, my dear."

He chewed the inside of his cheek as he gazed down at her. "Yeah, you always call me cute names when you're on drugs. Like that time in the hospital. And all those times you got high with me. Oh wait…" he trailed off. "Every time I asked you to smoke with me you said you didn't trust me enough. But tonight you trusted somebody else, eh?"

She giggled. "I knew you'd be mad at me too. We have much to talk about, baby boy."

In theory, the reason for Alessia's disappearance the following morning would be that she remembered the tea she spilled upon waking up and now she wanted to avoid the wrath of the goth girlfriend. In reality, she wouldn't be entirely wrong.

Even after sleeping for twelve hours, Annalise couldn't get those bits of forbidden information out of her head. She had dreams about catching Shawn and Alessia having really loud sex, but she woke up to hear her roommate doing exactly that. Then, she had a recurring dream of Shawn admitting to cheating on her, except this time he had twelve versions of Henry the orange tabby surrounding him. The last dream she remembered having was one where she ended up back in the hospital, and that she was given no anesthesia for her surgery. She had her stomach removed, and she watched every drop of blood and guts come out of the gaping hole in her body.

She woke with a start after every one of these vivid dreams. Maybe it was the after effects of being stoned, but she felt uneasy for that whole day. She typically binged to her heart's content, but the hospital dream was still on her mind. She allowed herself to have a Lunchables, but not much else.

Then, Monday rolled around and Annalise found it difficult to act like a person. She got out of bed, had an unsatisfying breakfast. She did it, and that's the only thing that matters right? Screw all the other feelings. The paranoia she felt after the Abnormal Psych lecture about eating disorders doesn't matter. The impending embarrassing discomfort from sitting alone at a table in Bio Lab doesn't matter either. Who cares about the sad ache in her chest after seeing Shawn and Alessia leave their class together? Who cares if they're still in high spirits even though they knew that Annalise knew? Who cares?

Annalise doesn't, that's for damn sure. She was perfectly fine. She pushed herself out of bed today even though she wanted nothing more than to induce a coma on herself. Who cares if she still felt shitty after?

Although, she was putting off the impending chat with Shawn until check in on Saturday. He had to know it was coming, why else would he just stop texting her?

Unless he's already with Alessia, and therefore playing me like a violin. Maybe Shawn was just ignoring me to make me go crazy.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," Annalise whispered as she put on her headphones. She was glad she caught herself slipping, she didn't want the wide-eyed crazies on display as she walked out of the Social Studies building.

Her steps were slower and more careful as she picked a song to play from her phone. After settling for Halsey, she pulled out her black, round sunglasses and put them on. Gotta hide them nightmare eyes.

Maybe… perhaps… I need to check in earlier than normal?

"Don't be stupid," she told herself.

It wouldn't hurt though, would it? Maybe he would be happy to see me since I would be breaking my own rule. Unless, of course, he's hanging around Alessia again. Perhaps he doesn't care anymore.

The only solution Annalise had was to dump herself on the couch in the dorm and play Tetris 99 until the thoughts and feelings sorted themselves out.

When Stella came home, she knew the drill. She sat on the couch and ranted about her day. She rambled on about her fascist history professor and the lack of a GSA club on campus. Then, she mentioned a Halloween party coming up at one of the frat houses, and that she needed a hot costume.

It was the month where Annalise and all her spooky darkness was socially acceptable, and she couldn't even be excited about it. A different type of darkness was taking over, and it was stupid that it was over a boy. Why did she have to be so dramatic? Why was she so goddamn crazy?

"I'll pick your costume," she said over Stella's rambling.

She paused, her brilliant hazel eyes wide. To say she was surprised that Annalise cracked so fast would be an understatement. But she smiled. "Would you? Ooo, can I pick yours?"

"Ah, I don't think I'm gonna do anything for Halloween this year."

"What? But it's your favorite holiday! You need to come to this party with me! Buddy system, remember?"

"Is that the only reason-"

"Of course not, you dummy! We haven't spent enough time together since the semester started! Let's go find some costumes, yeah? I'll even let you dress me up as scary as you want!"

Stella's a good friend. Annalise should really try harder to spend time with her. Why didn't she try to be a good friend in return?

They went to the local costume store that Friday. It gave Annalise a wonderful excuse to not go to the gaming club meeting. She really did not want to reflect on the Bart adventure, or see just how bad she fucked up Chad's nose.

After returning to campus with a dark but still cute witch costume, Stella was summoned to Camila's dorm. She thanked Annalise for the lovely costume choice and practically abandoned her. Annalise couldn't find it in her to really care. It was only a few more hours until Saturday.

She had barely settled herself on the couch when her phone buzzed. For the first time this week, Shawn had texted her. Annalise held her phone up, staring blankly at the screen. Her heart should be pounding right now, shouldn't it?

"Hey, I know check in is tomorrow but I can't make it at our usual time. I have a gig tomorrow night. You should come and we can talk after."

The next text was the address to the lounge he would be performing at.

Any other time, Annalise would have been happy to know Shawn was performing again. But he cancelled on her, knowing that he was in trouble. Is that what it took for him to start booking shows again? Was this just an elaborate way to avoid Annalise? Perhaps this was just some form of reverse psychology so she wouldn't go to the gig.

You can't psych out a psychology major. Of course Annalise was going to this gig.

However, she had a mostly sleepless night, really unable to shake the fact that Shawn was probably avoiding her. When she finally did sleep, she slept too much. Annalise woke up in the afternoon and was late for work. She had planned to ask if she could leave early, but she didn't dare try anything now. The gig was at eight, when her shift ended. She ended up going to the lounge in her work uniform, a button up with the dealership name on, and baggy slacks. Not exactly the sexy outfit she had planned during the late hours of insomnia.

The show had already started by the time she got there. As she was showing her ID to the bouncer, she heard Shawn's voice over the mic, and she felt something for the first time in days. Her stomach felt tight as she slowly stepped into the lounge.

The turnout was decent. Every single table and bar stool was occupied, and all eyes were on the band performing on the stage. Annalise looked around for any empty space; She wasn't dressed her best but she did want to be anywhere but against the wall opposite the stage. Her eyes spotted the group of people standing directly in front of the stage.

It was the normal group of girls who swooned every time Shawn blinked, but there were also three other girls that Annalise knew all too well. They were jumping and singing along to Lost in Japan, not a single care in the world. Annalise wondered why Stella didn't tell her that she was going to this event, but the way she looked at Camila as they sang to each other said enough. Maybe they chose Alessia to be their new third wheel too. So Alessia was too embarrassed to face Annalise, but not Shawn?

Annalise always stood in the back of every one of Shawn's shows, knowing she would stick out like a sore thumb in the midst of the usual fangirls. Not that that's a bad thing, it just wasn't her usual place to be. She figured that showing up at all would be enough.

Perhaps Shawn already had enough. Three of his friends were already cheering him on, and surely he had more of them scattered in the audience. Not to mention, the people here that didn't know him were going to adore him by the end of the night. Besides, Shawn most likely invited her as a ploy to get her to turn it down. She wasn't needed here. Annalise chewed the inside of her lip as she back up towards the exit. She stepped outside, away from the people trying to get in, and she pulled her phone out. She composed a new text:

"Hey, I'm drowning in work so I won't make it to your show. I'll meet you at your place later so we can talk🖤"

_______

taglist: @normalcyisoverrated-beyou @ilsolee @mendesromano @1-800-khalid-mendussy @kitykatnumber @strangerliaa @iloveshawnieboi @poppyshawn @shawnsunflower @shawnvvmendes @ruinhoney @someoneunimportantxx @calyumthomas @yourdeflightfullyleft @havethetimeeofyourlifee @shawmndes @wronglanemendes @chillingbythesea

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes smut #shawn x goth gf #yaint ready for the next chapter lol #im not even ready #it was so draining to write omg

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letsperaltiago · 5 years ago

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We’ll sweep out the ashes in the morning |CHAPTER 1|

Heeeere comes the Peraltiago scandal !

This story takes place in an alternative universe, where Amy applied for and got the job as 'data analyst' for for Major Crimes (See episode 1.15: 'Operation Broken Feather' for further reference). This means that Jake and Amy no longer work together and havent for a few years. This also means that I don't know what right and technical job title this new job would get Amy, so I'm just going with/imagining that she was still a detective even after her transfer.

Read it on AO3 or simply enjoy it here! I appreciate comments more than you know <3

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CHAPTER 1: I didn't mean to start this fire and neither did you

It really had been the best yet also most disastrous kind of accidental occurrence that day. Best back then, when Amy Santiago was promptly striding down the sidewalk on a just as coincidental cold, February morning.

Her head was dipped in a downwards adjustment, simply enough for her to absorb the new information on her phone which had just led her to pick it up from the pocket of her navy blue coat just a few seconds ago. Out of what seemed to be nowhere, it all came to a halt. Maybe more a thud and burst actually, when suddenly her phone flew out of her hand in one direction meanwhile the still warm coffee in her other hand travelled in the opposite direction. It took her a much startled second to realise that herself, her coffee, phone and a stranger suddenly had one thing in common; they were thrown off their respective paths with quite the vivacity. All that her eyes managed to grasp in the few fatal seconds was a black coat covering a masculine figure and chestnut-like hair. The remaining details remained undefined in her state of shock. All she knew was that she’d ignorantly stumbled into someone.

“Oh my goodness, I am so so sorry, sir!” She exclaimed immediately after her brain had put all the facts together and suddenly felt the guilt of being just another typical phone-addict; she used to be so good at limiting the amount of attention she’d give it. “I was reading an email and wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.” She kneeled to pick up her phone from the icy sidewalk as well as the now empty cup (even an accident like this was no excuse to be a litterbug).

“Wow, Santiago. Who would’ve thought I’d ever experience you on your knees and calling me sir?”

As she was practically on her knees, the figure standing in front and above her allowed himself to speak; right then and there Amy Santiago could’ve sworn that she felt a scrap of familiarity rush through her body’s nervous system. The octave of the voice, deep enough for man’s but not enough to hide the manchild behind; Calling her Santiago? No one else would do that without a preceding ‘Sergeant’; the facility of the fall of the joke? Like it came from a place of practice and habit? It could only be…

“Peralta?” In contrast to how her head had previously been tilted forwards and down, it was now tilted backwards to look up at the half-stranger and take in the indeed chestnut-like hair (still messy and curly), cinnamon eyes and surprisingly unsurprisingly mischievous smile.

“The one and only,” the chuckle was just as familiar as the rest of him. “Here,” he kneeled down to her level and started to pick up things she hadn’t even realised she’d dropped. “Let me help you out.” He started reaching out for her keys and lipstick that’d been resting safely (or so she thought) in her purse.

Meanwhile Amy was still kneeling but with her back now straightened in bewilderment whilst her eyes followed his every movement with the purpose of figuring out if he was actually real. For how long she did this exactly, she doesn’t recall, but next thing she knew he’d followed her example and straightened his back as well. Still on his knees and eyes directed at her whilst holding her stuff in his hands. Rushing people walking by, or rather around, the kneeling couple didn’t seem to give in to their New York-curiousness. It was 8 AM and everyone had places to go. Including Amy herself, she suddenly realised and snapped out of her until now absent state of mind.

“Oh, wow! Uhm- thank you,” she fumbled with her words and hands as she grabbed her things from him before hastily standing back up. Once both back on their feet it hit her that she was being suspiciously far-flung considering the fact that Jake Peralta was no stranger and had been looking at her with nothing but kind and inviting eyes ever since she took a first dive into them approximately 30 seconds ago. Her body’s response to this realisation was a swift shake of the head. “And oh my goodness- hi!” She stuttered overwhelmed and awkwardly (Santiago-stylez) in the act of finally smiling for the first time post collision.

“Hi,” the reply was followed by his figure instantly leaning in to hug her like he’d been holding it back since realising who he’d collided with. Of course she automatically let her arms wrap their way back around his broad shoulders, hating how completely right and practically overwhelmingly good it felt. Almost like something that’d been missing had made its way back home. This was only proved right by the fact that it almost, just almost, made her heart drop when he pulled back.

“How are you doing? It’s been forever!” There was a swift switch in the direction of his gaze upon noticing a few drops of coffee on his coat, provoking him to quickly brush them off before redirecting his attention back to her. She could’ve sworn he’d fumbled just a bit too much in the process. Almost like he’d hoped that she hadn’t noticed him taking his eyes off of her for just a second. Attentive as always, she thought.

“I’m good! And yeah it has been a while, hasn’t it?..” she couldn’t help but notice that the present dread in her voice was on the edge of obvious. Ever since Amy had gotten the job and transferred to Major Crimes to be a data analysts (with the Vulture), she had barely to never seen Jake since. Sure, they’d texted a bit back and forth, sent the occasional joke or meme, but even this had died out once they’d gotten used to the other’s absence at work and each their new life-partner: Teddy and Sophia.

“I’m glad to hear that,” Jake smiled brightly and Amy could never doubt the fact that he fully meant it. “…And I’m sorry I haven’t texted or called. Life, yanno?” He shot a look down at his carefully shuffling feet.

“Hey,” an impulse within her, like an overwhelming craving, brought her left hand to reach out across the space between them to gently squeeze his arm. “No worries. I’ve also been super busy and haven’t reached out. We’re cool.” To her delight his shoulders dropped in a sign of relaxation, his eyes rose back to hers and everything seemed to be as it should be, when you run into someone you used to know so well and maybe even used to consider your best friend. Pleased with this she allowed her hand to drop from its spot on him.

“No wonder why you’re out here running into people then, Santiago,” they both had to laugh at the comment, relishing in the resurfacing of familiar banter that used to and once again lead Amy to push a lock of her dark, freely hanging hair behind her ear. This triggered a thought that couldn’t help but welcome into his mind: would she still wear her hair up in the famous pony-tail he still remembered? Or was this lose hair her new thing? Her hair was so much longer now. Gosh, he had so many questions.

“Yeah, sorry about that. I got an email from work and had to check it,” she bit her bottom lip nervously, briefly holding up her phone as emphasis of her explanation.

“Always so devoted to duty,” Jake could barely tell if he was smiling again or just hadn’t stopped since he realised who he’d bumped into. “Anyways… I’m sure you have tons of things to catch up on, like emails and whatnot…” They both chuckled nervously, dancing around the fact that they both logically needed to go but seemed to lack the will. “… So I’ll let you get to work, detec-“

“Sergeant, actually,” there was a sense of pride and authority behind her correcting. Both in her voice and eyes. Something Jake couldn’t deny suited her incredibly well.

“Of course,” he picked up his now corrected point with a cheesy smile. “Why doesn’t that surprise me? I always knew you’d outrank me…” Jake couldn’t entirely tell if it was because of the cold or if it was because she was flattered, but her cheeks definitely bloomed with a shade of pink; just a tiny bit and enough for him to notice. “Anyways, I will let you get to work then, Sergeant…” he made sure to emphasise her new title, which to his enjoyment and suddenly lightly racing heart earned him an even wider smile in return. “Bye then.”

“Bye, Jake,” she smiled, before stepping beside him and picking up where her path had been interrupted.

With each clack of her heeled boots, each sound of her walking away and out of his life again, Jake felt his heart race beneath his increasingly clenching chest. Not that this had to mean anything specific, but it definitely brought along the manifestation of curiosity and the feeling of wanting to know more; he wanted to have a real conversation with her; he wanted to sit down and know her again… He felt his body push him to edge of actually asking which was oddly similar to wanting to throw up. There was nothing to lose or dangerous about catching up, right? They weren’t strangers, simply friends who’d drifted a part. Now was not the time to strive away from his otherwise so straightforward personality.

“Hey! Santiago!” He turned around on the spot, calling for her attention before she could get too far away and drown in New York’s sea of oh so important and busy people. Luckily she hadn’t been in a rush to get away from him and was simply a few feet away. “Would you like to catch up over a drink? Or crappy Chinese food?”

Hating how aware of his question he was, he was thrilled to see her smile at his last comment, resulting in the deflating of his question’s denseness.

“That…” She paused for a second, before realising that she was about to overthink it all which would mean giving the situation more meaning than actually needed. They were old colleagues, for Christ’s sake! Catching up was normal. Not weird. Not meaningful. Just… normal. Besides that there was this muted, constant thumping in her chest and gut. Somehow it was telling her that saying no would be betraying herself more than anything or anyone else. He had been her friend before, so it made sense that he hypothetically could become it again. “That would be nice, Peralta. Let’s do that. You still have my number right?”

Almost like he’d been holding his breath in anticipation (which he hadn’t ‘cause this was just Amy; Amy his old partner and friend), Jake breathed out a reply. “Yes! Awesome uh- I’ll text you!”

Her smile was accompanied by an approving nod, before she turned back away from him to continue her already twice interrupted journey to work. Apparently Amy Santiago still provoked his blabber mouth; two interruptions wouldn’t let her go without a third. “Or I’ll send an email since you’re apparently so absorbed by those these days.” His half-yelled comment fought its way through the noisy crowd and earned him the impeccable sight of Amy Santiago doing a quick 360 mid-stride, only to send him an iconic eye roll and ‘annoyed but it’s funny’-smile. It all happened so fast, yet in slow motion if you’d asked Jake, and before he knew it Amy continued straight ahead like nothing had happened. Jake could’ve almost (just almost!) sworn to God that he’d never seen anything more thrilling and satisfying than those three seconds that it took her to do that.

She hadn’t changed, had she? And neither had they, had they?

#jake x amy #peraltiago #peraltiago fanfiction #fanfiction #brooklyn nine-nine #b99 #fanfic #jake peralta #amy santiago #jake and amy

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wild3flow3r · 6 years ago

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Chapter Six

January 7th

Lorelai did not want to interview for a job as Xavier Styles’ assistant. She wanted nothing more to do with the Styles’, and if she got the job then she most definitely would not want to admit that Harry had helped her do so. But she desperately needed a job. She did not want to move back in with her parents or Jones who had offered to house her for a while, and not because she was too embarrassed or too prideful to do it. Lorelai didn’t want to move away from London. Sure, she didn’t have many friends here, or any for that matter, but the city called to her like it was always where she was meant to be.

So Lorelai sucked it up and gave Xavier a call after the New Year started, and after a short interview earlier this morning he instantly gave her the job. It was nice to have this to fall back onto, but she promised herself that this job would only be temporary. She would look for other jobs while working for Xavier, and when she finds one she will rid herself of all Styles’ for the rest of her life.

“I haven’t had an assistant in quite some time,” Xavier notifies her as he shows her to a desk outside of his office. “So it might take me some time to get used to.”

Harry looked so much like his Uncle Xavier that it was almost uncanny. From their freakishly tall height to their bright green eyes, Lorelai could definitely see the family resemblance. The only difference was that Xavier’s hair was a sandy blonde that was starting to turn gray. All this did for Lorelai was further prove one of her theories about Harry, that he and his family were just a bunch of clones sent to Earth to ruin everyone’s life.

Except Xavier was so much nicer than Harry. In place of Harry’s snarl, Xavier was always smiling at her and being respectful to her. Being a nice human being must skip a generation, Lorelai thinks to herself.

Lorelai sets her bag down on the desk and turns to smile politely to him. “Well, just think of it this way. Whenever there’s a part of your job that comes up that you don’t want to do, the tedious work, just give me a call and I’ll get it done for you.”

Xavier shakes his head in amusement before walking off towards his office. “Get yourself settled, and in about an hour or so I’ll be emailing you something that I’ll need to be faxed over to another doctor. Faxing might be my least favorite part of the job.”

Lorelai frowns, which Xavier thankfully doesn’t catch because he’s already shut his office door behind him. Another thing that Styles’ have in common, she supposes.

Lorelai sits down at the chair provided for her, and clicks the computer mouse twice. Xavier Styles owned his own medical practice, naturally. He’s a cognitive behavioral therapist for children and teenagers, meaning he helped his patients confront any types of problems they were having and help them get better. Lorelai really respected him for his work; it was much better being a assistant for him than for a divorce lawyer.

As it was the first day the practice was open since the New Year started, Xavier was taking the day to settle back into the work setting and would start seeing patients the following day. Lorelai types in her new login information that Xavier had given her, and luckily she finally gets it right on the third try. After signing into her new email as well, Lorelai takes a moment to text Jones and her mother that she’s gotten this new job. She knows they will be pleased with how much more money she’ll be making as well.

The hour passed by slowly, but finally Xavier sent her the documents that needed to be faxed. She’s about to print them out when the phone on her desk begins to ring. After quickly clearing her throat, she picks the phone up and pressed it to her ear.

“Hello, this is Xavier Styles’ office. How may I help you?” Lorelai attempts to keep her voice as bright and chipper as possible.

“So my brother finally got himself an assistant, eh?” There was a man on the other side of the phone, and his rough voice instantly makes Lorelai tense up for two reasons. One, unless Harry had another uncle then Lorelai was currently speaking to his father. And two, just by the way he spoke Lorelai could tell that he was even worse than Harry, and he’d only said one thing to her.

“Yes sir, he just hired me today,” Lorelai lets him know, unable to think of anything else to say.

“You would think because… Well never mind. Just tell him I need to speak to him. It’s an urgent family matter.”

“Yes sir, please hold for a moment.” Lorelai's index finger presses a button on the phone so that it transfers her to Xavier’s office phone. She immediately lets out a loud breath from no longer being on the phone with another Styles’ man that she hopes she never has to meet. Two of them were enough for her.

“What is it, Miss Sterling?” Xavier asks, picking up his phone after two rings.

“Your brother is on line two, sir. He says he needs to speak to you about an urgent family matter.”

Xavier lets out a deep sigh. “Alright, thank you, Miss Sterling.” The line goes dead and Lorelai hangs up her phone. She stands then to print out and fax the documents.

Xavier exits his office ten minutes later, just as Lorelai was finishing up. He eyes her for a moment with a contemplative expression. It makes her uncomfortable, but she waits for him to speak first.

“How long were you on the phone with my brother before you transferred his call over?”

Lorelai stands by her desk with her hands behind her back. “Only for a moment,” she responds.

“Did you tell him… Did you tell him about knowing Harry?”

Lorelai cocks her head to the side before shaking it twice. “Only that it was my first day here, and then I transferred the call.”

Xavier nods curtly before turning around. “If he calls again, don’t interact in any small talk with him. Just immediately transfer him over, or if I’m not here apologize for it and hang up.” He shuts his office doors behind him.

What the hell is going on? Lorelai sits back down in her chair with a soft thud. She didn’t really seem to know why it mattered that she knew Harry, but Xavier was acting pretty perturbed after the phone call. Just a few more weeks until I can find another job, Lorelai reminds herself. Just a few more weeks until she can rid herself of this family forever.

***

As there weren’t any patients today, Xavier let Lorelai leave an hour earlier than her newly scheduled release time. She was very thankful for the fact, and already she could see that she would enjoy working with Xavier for the next few weeks drastically more than she ever liked working with Bertram. Her original plan had been to go directly home and call her parents while making dinner, but instead she caught the tube that took her away even further from her home. She had struck an idea as she was exiting Xavier’s practice, and the idea was making her act on impulse.

Lorelai must have been out of her mind, she told herself that several times as she stood outside the building in this freezing weather. The sky looked like it was about to start pouring at any moment, but Lorelai stood stock still against a wall. She was beginning to shake, from the cold and also from what she was about to do, but she barely even noticed.

Lorelai stood outside for exactly thirty-three minutes before Harry Styles exited the Clemens & Son building. He didn’t notice her at first as he strolled over to his car, his ever present frown playing across his lips. He still didn’t notice her as he threw his briefcase into the backseat of his car and closed the door with a quick slam, even though she was standing only five feet away from him. Lorelai walks those few feet over to him just before he can grip the handle of the drivers side door, and taps his shoulder twice. He jumps around so fast, his eyes wild with surprise and confusion, and Lorelai would have laughed if he wasn’t Harry Styles.

“Lorelai-”

“We don’t work together anymore.” Lorelai states calmly.

Harry raises an eyebrow. “We don’t.”

“You’re no longer my superior.”

“I’m not.” His voice was thick with uncertainty.

“You’re an arsehole, did you know that?”

Harry leans against his car, almost like she’d pushed him. “Yeah, I know that.”

“You don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

“I don’t,” he responds, but it sounded more like he was just repeating her words than actually agreeing with her.

“I’ve been wanting to tell you off so bad since the first day you walked into Clemens & Son. You were such a prick to me that day. You said things about me behind my back before you even knew me.”

Harry frowns now, the memory of his first day playing in his mind. “I did.”

“And then you just get me fired? How could you do that? Everything I’ve ever done to you, none of it will ever match those two terrible things you’ve done to me.” Lorelai was close to tears, but she takes a few deep breaths to try and keep them at bay.

He watches her carefully, taking in her trembling form and wobbling lip. He places his hands on her shoulders and she goes to shrug them off but it only makes him hold onto her tighter.

“You’re freezing,” he acknowledges while holding her still. “Get in my car, I’ll drive you home.”

Lorelai shakes her head, but he’s already leading her to the passenger side of his car. He opens the door for her, but she doesn’t make a move to step into the car.

“Why did you fire me? Tell me why you fired me, and I’ll get into the car,” Lorelai demands.

Harry sighs, his body blocking hers from trying to walk away from him if she wanted to. “I’ve announced today to Bertram that in two months Clemens & Son will have to close down. He spends money like he isn’t running a company, and it’s finally caught up to him. If you were laid off at the same time as the rest of us and couldn’t find a job immediately after, or if I couldn’t get my uncle to hire you, then the company doesn’t owe you anything. But if you were fired before the announcement was made, then we owe you a certain amount of money each month until you find another job or six months after your firing date, whichever comes first. It was just a precaution.”

“But-”

“Please, Lorelai,” Harry cuts her off and lightly pushes her towards the open car door. “Can we talk about the rest of this in the car before we catch frostbite?”

Lorelai’s shoulders slump down before climbing into the car. Harry shuts the door behind her before entering on his own side, immediately turning the car on and the heat to its maximum. She leans her head against the headrest while closing her eyes and trying to catch her bearings. The rain starts to pour down only a few seconds later.

It was silent for about another minute before Lorelai speaks up again. “Why were you so rude your first day at Clemens & Son?”

Harry stays quiet and instead pulls his car out of its parking spot. Lorelai sighs when Harry continues to be silent and she knows she won’t get an answer.

“You’ve ruined me, did you know that?” Lorelai looks over to him, and the frown on his face looks different than it normally does. It’s not laced with annoyance or stress, but with sadness. But Lorelai also thinks that it might just look that way by the lack of lighting surrounding them, because she’s pretty sure that Harry Styles can’t feel any normal emotions other than anger.

“I don’t like myself when I’m with you. You turn my into someone I don’t like. And then I think of you when I’m by myself and all the awful things you make me feel, and I feel terrible about myself even when you’re not around. I never used to feel like this, ever.”

Harry still doesn’t go to speak, and this frustrates Lorelai even more. She wants to hit him, push him around until he makes a noise, because she wants some sort of acknowledgement from him. Some way to know that he’s listening to her and properly taking in the words she’s saying.

“Pull the car over, I want to get out. I can get myself home,” Lorelai demands of him when she’s finally tired of his silence.

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s freezing outside and with the rain you’ll get sick.” He finally responds, barely taking a moment to glance at her before looking back towards the road.

“I’d rather catch the flu than spend another minute with you. It’s not like you care about what happens to me anyways, so just let me get out.”

Harry laughs now, but it’s not one of amusement. The sound causes Lorelai to freeze in her seat and it sends chills down her spine. “You don’t think I fucking care?” He does pull the car over, but he keeps the doors locked so that Lorelai can’t escape. He turns towards her then in his seat, and Lorelai leans against the window of her door.

“I know you don’t,” Lorelai responds quickly.

“I wasn’t talking about you on my first day. It was that woman who worked downstairs, Martha, Margaret, whatever the fuck her name was. She got fired the week after I started working there. Sure I wasn’t the nicest to you on my first day, and maybe I should’ve made those comments about what’s her name in a more professional fashion, but I had a bit of an ego-complex back then that made me think I was the best fucking thing that happened to that office ever. And then you argued with me on everything I did every single day, and I’ll admit you knocked me down a couple pegs. Also I’ve only just recently come to terms with this, but no matter how hard I tried to be the best worker at Clemens & Son, no matter how much work I put into my job, you were always fucking better.

“I’ve been trying to get you a raise from Bertram for almost three months before you brought the idea up to me. I spent countless hours trying to convince Bertram to let us have Christmas off just so you could go see your family. I ordered you a teapot for your collection for Christ’s sake, and don’t ask me why because I genuinely do not know why. The amount of times I told Bertram to stop staring at you like… like… well you know what I mean. It was endless, and I did it because I knew how uncomfortable it would make you feel. So don’t say that I don’t care, because I bent over backwards to get my uncle to even consider hiring an assistant. And I don’t bend for anyone.”

Lorelai sits there in shock, Harry’s words entering her system and her body wanted to immediately reject them. They didn’t sound right, the things Harry was saying, they didn’t sound like him. But if what he was saying was true, then she didn’t really know him at all, not really.

“I’ve been horrible to you to your face, I know that. I didn’t think… I don’t want you to not like yourself.”

“I… I want to go home,” Lorelai finally responds, crossing her arms over her chest as if hugging herself. “Just take me home.” She would have demanded she be let out, let her find her own way home, but she didn’t think she could get her legs to work properly in this moment.

So Harry pulls away from the curb, both of their confessions thick in the air, but nobody speaks. Not one word for the entire ride, and Lorelai doesn’t wish him any goodbyes as she steps out of the car. She barely even waited for him to come to a full stop before throwing her door open.

Lorelai's only two feet away from the car when Harry rolls the window down.

“I’m sorry, Lorelai. I really am.”

Lorelai turns towards him, her mouth open to say something even though no words were coming to her mind, but Harry drove off before he could face her reaction.

#1dff #cmiyc #cmiyc6 #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #one direction fanfiction

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panda-noosh · 6 years ago

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Ohmigodtheyreopendidimakeit??. I'd like to request something with Kolivan, if that's okay with you. Maybe a royal from some planet enslaved by Galra was saved by Marmoras and hidden on Earth to ensure their safety. Years later the royal reunites with the ressistance leader as a partner of Voltron and to everyone's surprise, they've been lovers this whole time yearning to meet again? Idk i'll take literally anything Kolivan bc i love my baby just as much as i love ur writing ;u;

The people from Earth had arrived.

Kolivan hollowed out his cheeks, running his fingers along his braid. It had been two weeks. Two weeks of Earthlings coming in and out of the ship, none of them you, but all of them having a potential he couldn’t ignore. His mind was elsewhere, though, even as he recruited them and sent them on their way to whatever area of expertise he thought them worthy to work in.

He was preparing himself for yet another wave of disappointment, as sad as it was for him to admit it. Two weeks of looking for your face amongst the new recruits was beginning to ebb away at him, leaving him feeling hollow. He wanted to believe you had made it, that his efforts of hiding you on Earth hadn’t gone to waste - but the longer this recruitment process dragged on, the more he was beginning to doubt his own tactics.

“Everything okay, big guy?”

It was Lance, appearing at Kolivan’s side with a flask of hot chocolate offered forward. Kolivan tried his hand at a smile, reached around and grabbed the flask from the young Paladin, before his expression wavered and he was back to frowning at the door in which the new recruits would soon be bustling in from.

Lance seated himself beside him, sipping at his own paper cup of hot chocolate. Kolivan actually wasn’t a big fan of hot chocolate, but he humoured the Paladin anyway by keeping the steaming flask in his hand.

“You’ve been awfully distant lately,” said Lance. “I know you’re into the whole being mysterious thing, but we haven’t seen you in a while. You know you can tell us if something is bothering you, right?”

Kolivan was grateful for it, even if he struggled to show it. He had spent the majority of his life trusting only the Blade, the people he had trained, the people he would lay his life down for; the fact that Team Voltron had now taken such a swift liking to him surprisingly warmed his heart, no matter how cold he may seem from time to time.

“I think I hear the new recruits coming,” Lance spoke up suddenly, startling Kolivan out of his stupor. His head shot up, mouth opening just slightly before - sure enough - the doors in front of him burst open and Slav came bustling in, leading a new group of recruits into the meeting hall.

Kolivan stood up as Shiro and the other Paladins emerged from the back room, ready to greet the nervous looking people who had just arrived. Kolivan couldn’t help the surge of hope that immediately ran through his system, his yellow eyes training on the group in any attempt to catch a glimpse of you standing amongst them; you wouldn’t be difficult to spot, and Kolivan knew that. He would recognise you from a mile away, plus the fact that you were a royal. You weren’t exactly very subtle in a crowd, not with the way you carried yourself.

He nibbled on his bottom lip. Shiro was talking, but he couldn’t hear him. The crowd was murmuring, and he was certain that one of the recruits had asked about the Blade, but their question was answered by Keith, who quickly noted Kolivan’s distant expression and stepped forward to take the lead.

You weren’t there. You weren’t there. Yet again, another group of recruits had come buzzing through, and you were nowhere in sight. Kolivan’s heart fell into his stomach. He cursed the world, cursed himself for falling in love with someone like you - from the moment he had left you on earth, for your own protection, he should have known he would never see you again. He should have known-

“Oh god, sorry! Sorry!”

The noise did not come from the crowd.

Kolivan whirled around, the blood howling in his ears, because there you were. You had stumbled in from the back room, the very same room in which Shiro and the other Paladins had just emerged from; how had you even gotten in there in the first place?

Shiro rolled his eyes. “I thought I told you to be on time.”

“I’m sorry,” you hissed, trying desperately to straighten out the golden jacket you were wearing. In your hand was a large number of clipboards, all of which seemed to be sliding from your grip with every passing moment. “Have we chosen the new recruits yet?”

Kolivan could have been kicked directly in the back of the head at that moment, and he most likely wouldn’t have felt it.

He hadn’t been away from Voltron for that long. It had been a week, maybe two of his isolation - where had you come from? How had he not seen you, even heard of your arrival?

You hadn’t spotted him yet, considering Kolivan had taken comfort in the shadows. You were much too busy struggling with the clipboards perched on your hip, barely looking up when you waved your hand in Shiro’s direction, telling him to continue on with the speech he was making previously.

Shiro coughed awkwardly, turned back to the crowd and started talking. Kolivan wanted to listen, but then you were looking up and your eyes met his and suddenly there was no crowd. There was no speech being made, no important business to be dealt with.

It was just you and him all over again, and his heart was beating at a million miles per hour and he was saying a silent prayer to gods he didn’t even believe in because you were there, in front of him, after so many years of him struggling to communicate with you.

It was one step. That was all it took for him to shove past Lance and scoop you up into his massive arms. Immediately you buried your head in the crook of his neck, and Kolivan could feel the damp of your tears against his flesh, but he paid it no attention. The only thing he could really concentrate on was the feel of your arms around his neck and the way you felt so light in his arms.

The Paladins and the crowd had long since gone silent, watching the spectacle unfold in confusion.

“You two know each other?” Lance perked up.

You buried your head deeper into the crook of Kolivan’s neck.

“Very well,” Kolivan mumbled. He didn’t know if the Paladins could hear his reply, didn’t really care.

That was when you pulled away and pressed your lips to his own at long last. It was the moment he had been waiting for, but the moment he had been too afraid to initiate in the beginning - it had been years, after all. Years since he had held you like this, years since he had kissed you and made you feel important. Your feelings were bound to have shifted, no matter how much you hugged him now.

“Why aren’t you on earth?” Kolivan whispered against your flesh. “You were safe on earth. I needed you to stay safe...”

“I couldn’t leave you,” you replied. “I stayed for a few years, Kolivan, I really did, but the thought of you putting yourself into danger every single day, not knowing what you were doing or how you were - I couldn’t do it. I had to find you.”

Kolivan squeezed his eyes shut, squeezed you that little bit tighter. Oh, how he wanted to argue, how he wanted to call you stupid and irresponsible for even thinking of following him into the war that could end everything.

But Kolivan had learned to put himself in other peoples shoes. He imagined himself on earth, you in space fighting off things that had the intentions of pure evil; he would have done the exact same thing. He wouldn’t have even thought twice.

And maybe that’s why he pressed you a little tighter into his body, nuzzled his head a little deeper into your collar bone, whispered “I love you,” a little more fiercely - because you were here now, and Kolivan was realising now that he wasn’t ready to let you go again.

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batgirl-87 · 6 years ago

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So @mdeenise “challenged” me to answer all of the questions from this Hogwarts Mystery Asks: MC. I’ve already answered some (can check ‘asks’ or ‘ask game’ tags, I’ll also link them in my Masterlist) so I’ll answer the rest I haven’t been asked yet here because

1. What is their whole name?

Nereida Adelyn-Keira LaFontaine Black

5. How is there relationship with Jacob?

Keira and Jacob were very close - it was them against the world! They’re very protective of one another, they can get/have gotten into a lot of trouble together, both with a rebellious, mischievous streak; but they are also siblings so there’s teasing, embarrassing each other, lots of physical ‘play fighting’ - they’re very much like I can be mean to my sibling but if you’re mean to them I’ll hurt you. Clearly when he ‘disappeared’ it was devastating for Keira and she felt completely alone.

6. How is their relationship with their parents?

Both Keira and Jacob loved their mom who was their primary caregiver. Keira honestly doesn’t really remember her dad much but Jacob hates him. She has a vague recollection of him and Regulus and Sirius, a bit better memory of Sirius who kept in contact with her and Jacob even after they moved to Canada, possibly to spite his parents but Keira thinks he actually cares about his younger half-siblings even if it was something that started out from spite or curiosity.

When their mom died of course Jacob and Keira were very sad over their loss. They were then taken in by their mom’s close friends and moved to Canada from Ireland and while there was an adjustment period they both appreciate the care they provided, and while Jacob and Keira didn’t exactly feel like they belong in this ‘family’ their mom’s friends were great parental figures and they do care about them and appreciate everything they’ve done for them. Their dad was nonexistent in their lives after the passing of their mom (he passed soon after the next year, after the death of Regulus) but when they arrived in the UK to attend Hogwarts they did find savings left for them from their dad in Gringotts (safe to assume without his wife’s knowledge).

So both love their mom and ‘adopted’ parents (unofficially adopted =p) and while Jacob hates their dad and views him as a manipulative, selfish, neglectful arse, Keira is pretty neutral and apathetic about her dad since she doesn’t really remember him all that well. But she appreciates the money! =p

8. How’s their relationship with their family?

Ahahahahahaha - I’m cackling =p

Unfortunately, the family on Keira and Jacob’s mom’s side are all pretty much passed or they have no idea who they are =p Their mom and mom’s parents are passed and their mom had no siblings since her mom died relatively soon after her birth (undines...) As stated before, Jacob and Keira appreciate and care very much for their mom’s friends who took them in after her passing, although a bit of awkwardness since it’s not ‘really’ their family...

As for the Black side of their family *more cackling* Orion seemed much more interested in their mom than them and didn’t seem to want much to do with them, at least according to Jacob. Walburga hates them and this whole situation, of course! With good reason! She honestly probably would of had them killed. She focused most of her energy on ensuring this scandal did not get out into the public and was probably very relieved when they moved across the pond. Of course when Jacob returned to attend Hogwarts he was done living this lie and didn’t care who it upset and went by his Black family name, encouraging his sister to do the same - this family would not win! Walburga could try to deny it all she wanted but a paternity test (which I’ve done some research on Wizarding World paternity tests and some interesting ideas came up!) just proved it.

Despite this, Walburga and the rest of the Black family continued to ignore their entire existence. Andromeda may have been left out of the loop considering she was disowned from the family as well but when Keira and Tonks realized they were both related to Bellatrix Lestrange, and therefore related themselves, Keira was so happy to be accepted by some members of the Black family. Sirius also was accepting of his younger half-siblings and stayed in contact with them even after they moved to Canada. He may have only gone to see them at first out of curiosity and then continued to visit and communicate with them out of spite to his parents but he probably did care about them and enjoyed them more than Regulus because they weren’t brought up in a pureblood elitist household. Probably wished their mom was his mom which would just upset Walburga. And if Walburga didn’t hate them before, after she passed, Keira, now more spiteful and daring with everything that has happened, moved into the now empty (well except for Kreacher) 12 Grimmauld Place which would just piss Walburga off! How she convinced Remus, no idea - basically she was like I’m doing this and Remus had to go along with it =p

Wait, is Kreacher family? Keira and Kreacher argue a lot and she will not stand for him being mean to Remus or any of her friends and will threaten to kick him out although it’s an empty threat because she wouldn’t actually kick him out and make him homeless! Kreacher of course thinks she’s invading some place that does not belong to her but because she is a Black she sort of does belong there and while not related to his previous Walburga, she is to Orion so he has to put up with her =p They eventually reach an understanding. Kreacher is free to stay there and does not have to do any chores or cleaning up after her or Remus, as long as he’s nice... or just stays away from her friends and Remus.

I’m not sure how Regulus felt about them, maybe neutral? I think discovering his dad’s affair would be a shock to him, he might be curious as well to meet them and I like to think did meet them at least once, possibly while their mom was passing (like Orion went to see her and Sirius and Regulus decided to go as well because, hey, it is their younger siblings whether they like it or not and it’s a hard thing to go through) but I think he was more worried and concerned about Death Eater affairs and tricking Voldemort =p

So while Keira is close with Tonks, and probably her parents as well, and both Keira and Jacob are accepted by Sirius, and maybe even Regulus, who knows =p, most of the Black family still pretends they don’t exist. Although I like to think Keira later bonds with Draco and they become close and overall these next generations are going to be better. And while Bellatrix may refuse to acknowledge Keira’s relationship to her, deep down she actually really likes Keira because she’s a strong, tough bitch who isn’t afraid of her and would have killed Dumbledore without even being a Death Eater if asked =p Seriously, Keira knows she’s actually Bella’s favorite.

(This also pretty much works for my original HP OC bio where she was Sirius’ daughter because besides Tonks, Andromeda, and Ted, the rest of the Black family wouldn’t really acknowledge her existence either)

Does Remus count as family? Of course he does, he’s “Uncle Remus!” =p Remus and Keira had an instant bond, they are incredibly close - I like to think of it as two people who felt completely alone in the world found each other and now they were not longer alone. Keira is very much like Sirius, and Jacob can be very much like James actually, so it was actually nice for Remus to be around them if not bittersweet. I actually have a post about Keira and Remus’ relationship so I won’t say too much more besides they are very close and Keira is suuuuper protective over him.

9. Do they have any other siblings?

Sirius and Regulus Black

11. Do they have pets?

Keira has a Siamese cat and Jacob had a Barred Owl named Archimedes which I guess is hers now too? Jacob also wanted a dog or crup but then went to school so their ‘adoptive’ parents are taking care of it =p

14. Any crushes?

Charlie Weasley.

She won’t outright admit it but it’s obvious to everyone else besides Charlie. Wasn’t even aware of it herself for quite awhile! =p But fortunately she plays it pretty cool and isn’t a stuttering mess around him so maybe he has no idea she likes him because she’s so chill and nonchalant about it. Although she can be flirtatious but she can be like that with a lot of people =p (She’s related to Sirius she can’t help it! =p)

16. Have they ever dated someone before (Either back at their home or at Hogwarts)?

Rumour has it during her summer before Sixth Year, where she spent most of it in Canada, and going into Sixth Year she was dating someone. Has not been confirmed nor denied. 😜

(I think that’s all of them? Wasn't that much actually, I expected more =p But I still wrote a lot more than intended so sorry about that! Hope I explained things well enough! If anyone has any questions or want to talk about MC’s more hit me up! Thanks for your challenge! 😉💙)

#hphm #hogwarts mystery #hphm mc #my mc #asks #ask game #thank you so much for asking

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