#i haven't been feeling too great about my writing lately

[savage-rhi]

Mending Shadows // Chapter 20

Summary:

Y/N was a simple Scavenger of Lucis, until meeting a deadly blow at the hands of an infected creature. At the crossroads of death, they are found by Niflheim’s cryptic Chancellor with his own agenda. Now bonded to Ardyn Izunia, and tossed into the world of Niflheim, Y/N struggles to cope with their new life as an Imperial Icon all the while battling their feelings toward their fate and that of Ardyn’s.

Click here to read on AO3

The palace halls to the residency were quiet. Save for the shuffling of Imperial Help preparing to turn in for the night. Ardyn made note how there was not so much a peep while he ventured to his dwelling. He sighed while adjusting the large grocery bag he had been carrying with his left arm. The contents rattled, and at first Ardyn assumed something had gotten loose. He paused in his stride, lowering the bag to look over his wares. There was nothing amiss, and thus he pressed onward. 

After fumbling with his keys--and nearly dropping the bag--Ardyn closed the door behind him once he reached home. He sat the grocery bag down at his feet while he tended to locking up. Once that was settled, did his eyes land on the large clock in the living room. Seeing that it was 10:45pm, Ardyn furrowed his brows. He knew he had been out long, but could’ve sworn it was 8pm just moments ago. Sighing, Ardyn knew it was useless to dwell on such mishaps. He still struggled with conceptualizing time although it had been decades since he had been awakened from Angelgard. Not that he would be bold enough to admit that to anybody. The thought of it made him grimace before he picked up the grocery bag, and carried on with his mission. 

Ardyn pressed the kitchen doors open quietly. He nearly jumped when he saw Tuti at the counter, putting away some dishes from the sink. She in turn gasped, and fumbled with one of the plates in her possession. It was by the fortune of the gods she didn’t drop it, having caught the edge at the last second. 

Once the initial shocks were worn, Tuti glared at Ardyn with contempt then went back to cleaning. 

Ardyn breathed through his nose, making a face while he tried to uphold some sort of civility. He walked over to the kitchen island, and sat the bag down while clearing his throat. 

“I won’t be needing your services for the rest of the night.” 

“Noted,” Tuti replied with a flat tone. 

“That goes for Y/N as well. You’re dismissed.” Ardyn added. He observed Tuti stiffen, and with a defeated sigh, she put away the last of the plates she had been cleaning. Once done, did she begin to dry her hands off with a towel hanging from the arm of the oven in front of her. 

“How is Y/N fairing?”

“Y/N’s resting right now. The flares today were dreadful.” Tuti wiped the last of the suds off her hands with her apron, and approached Ardyn. She was careful not to get too close to him. 

Tuti let out a breath. “Will that be all, excellency? I have much work to do outside of your quarters. I don’t want to keep the Palace Warden waiting.” 

If she was going for subtlety, she’s failing at it… Ardyn bitterly thought. Tuti’s disdain wasn’t easy to cloak. She wore it on her sleeve much like her bubbly persona. Ardyn fought against his instinct to shoo her off for insubordination, but he reminded himself that although he didn’t like her, both he and Tuti cared for Y/N. 

“Before you leave, I have something for you.” Ardyn took a few steps toward the kitchen island. His right hand rummaged through the grocery bag, and he pulled out a small pink rose and an envelope. 

“What’s this?” Tuti whispered, raising a brow as Ardyn approached and handed off the items to her. Her fingers pinched at the envelope, feeling how full it was. Conflict brewed in her eyes while she admired the pink rose. As much as Tuti wanted to throw it back at Ardyn’s face, she appreciated the beauty of the flower too much to insult its radiance. She carefully tucked the flower behind her right ear, and began to open the envelope. 

“Consider it tip for taking care of Y/N on my behalf.” Ardyn watched as Tuti’s eyes nearly bulged out from her skull. He faintly smirked before going neutral. 

“That’s almost five months of salary.” Tuti murmured under her breath. By the mercy of the gods did she gather strength to peer up at Ardyn, and glared at him. “I’ll have you know, that you can’t just buy someone’s forgiveness.” 

“I’m well aware,” Ardyn said as a matter of fact and sighed. “Is it working though?” 

“Well,” Tuti breathed. She counted the bills in the envelope and shook her head. “If I remember, the gods forgive all sin on Sundays. Including someone selling their virtue.” 

Ardyn let out an amused huff, watching Tuti carefully tuck the envelope into the back pocket of her apron. He was about to say something, until Tuti held up a hand and cut him off. 

“Please, I don’t wish to have a conversation anymore Chancellor. I want to perform my duties, and turn in for the night.” 

“Very well,” Ardyn gestured with his head toward the exit. “Don’t let me keep you.” 

Tuti offered a bow, and walked over to the doors. She paused for a moment, turning her head to the side to watch Ardyn go back to pulling things out of the grocery bag. There was a lot of food from what she could gather. A soft sigh left her lips, and Tuti cleared her throat. 

“Chancellor,” 

“Yes?”

“Y/N was adamant about speaking with you despite…well, what happened. You needn’t worry.” Tuti murmured. The face she wore was a mix of disappointment and awe.

Ardyn gave a firm nod after he hummed in reply, then continued to carry on, not paying heed to Tuti as she finally left. 

Hours later, Ardyn carefully approached a large bed. His eyes combed over Y/N’s resting form that was draped under the blankets. He paused when he saw their feet dangling off the edge, noting the scourge veins bulging out. Ardyn could only imagine what the rest of their body looked like. The thought nerved him and Y/N’s shallow exhales didn’t help. If anything, he felt worse about what happened this morning.

Hovering above Y/N, Ardyn canted his head while examining their features. They were lying on their side, half their face buried into the large silk pillow below. The scourge marks pulsated when Y/N drew in breath. Ardyn closed his eyes, focusing his own darkness on the daemonic aura that coursed through Y/N’s veins. A crackling sound echoed against Ardyn’s ears, and whispers began to rise and fall. His own conscience was nearly drowned out by the noise, but he firmly repeated in mind for the shadows to cease. When he opened his eyes, the world became silent again. 

Though Y/N’s infection was not even a fraction of Ardyn’s ailment, he could feel the toll it had on their body and the struggle to remain alive despite the horrendous pain. With resentment, Ardyn glared at the dark webbing on Y/N's skin. He crouched down until he was on his knees. His face now level with Y/N and the mattress. 

Thoughts ran through Ardyn as he sighed through his nose. He wondered if Y/N would be upset with his presence near considering what happened. Ardyn wasn’t one to apologize, especially in this incarnation as Chancellor, but even with all his justifications he couldn’t let this slide. Not when he knew in his heart of hearts, that he was in the wrong. 

“Y/N,” Ardyn murmured softly. His right hand reached to touch their neck, fingers gliding over skin until his palm gently cupped their cheek. He watched the scourge veins begin to recede; the darkness having listened to his plea from before. His features perked when Y/N groaned, and their eyes fluttered open briefly. 

“Y/N,” Ardyn leaned forward. His nose pressed to their skin, inhaling their scent before drifting up to their ear. A tired mix between groan and giggle left Y/N’s mouth, and he couldn’t help but smile like an idiot. 

“I have something for you.” He whispered into the shell of their ear.

“That’s a lie,” Y/N muttered exhausted while they stirred more from their rest. “We both know you don’t like charity.”��

Ardyn chuckled against Y/N’s hair. His lips gently pressed against the side of their head before he pulled away. He met Y/N’s weary gaze, and the marks he had left upon their skin. He felt nauseous gazing over the black and blue texture. 

“I’d like for you to join me at the table if you have the strength. I made us a meal.” 

Despite how drained Y/N felt from the scourge, their brows raised in surprise. “You didn’t have Tuti do that on your behalf? I’m shocked.”

“No. Not this time.” Ardyn admitted with a smirk. “Believe it or not, I can perform menial tasks by myself. I just choose not to.” 

“What’s the occasion? I thought I was in the hot seat.” Y/N’s voice trailed off and they swallowed. 

“You’re in no such position with me,” Ardyn shook his head. He moved a stray strand of hair out from their eyes, his touch lingering. “I...wanted to do this for you.” 

“This morning--”

“No, let’s not speak on it right now. Later we will. You have my word. ” Ardyn interrupted. His amber eyes lingered between Y/N’s mouth and their hair. Before he got too lost, Ardyn retreated his hand away from them and he gestured with his head to the chamber doors. 

“Let’s get you out of bed. I don’t want the food to run cold. Do you need assistance?” 

“Yeah,” Y/N nodded and winced when they moved their left foot. 

“I can carry you?” Ardyn offered. 

“I’d like to do this myself. Just let me lean on you.” Y/N murmured. They didn’t notice the hurt that crossed Ardyn’s face at their decline. 

Taking in a few deep breaths, Y/N let out a cry and forced the upper half of their body to rise from the bed. The motion felt as if they had run their entire body through a thicket of barbed wire. With every movement they made in the trench, it only ensnared them further into the spiky ends that dug into flesh. When Ardyn attempted to help, Y/N shook their head and gestured for him to stand down. They were surprised at his compliance, given the fierce look that carried through his eyes.

Y/N started to flex their fingers, getting them to wake up. After the wave of pain died down, did they gather the strength to stand. On their feet, Y/N wobbled like a bookcase whose shelves were not properly lined up. Their feet felt static as did their blood. The scourge constricting around their calves like snakes didn’t help with their balance, and caused them to fall forward into Ardyn’s chest. Through a muffled yelp, Y/N felt their body adjust as Ardyn gently pushed them back and went to their side. He coaxed Y/N’s body into leaning against his own, while his arm went around their waist for support. After finding their balance, did Y/N motion for Ardyn to move and begin their trek to the kitchen. 

The walk was a quiet affair, minus the whimpers and occasional groans that fell past Y/N’s lips. Every once in a while, Ardyn glanced down at Y/N to assess them; noting that their body had been severely taxed. He started to second guess waking them up in the first place, seeing the grey bags under their eyes. There was also the proximity piece that had his blood quake with each step. The texture of their skin, the sweet smell of their own scent intermingling with the essence of the scourge, and the weight of their body against him had Ardyn worried he’d go haywire. His pulse rose unsteadily, wondering if perhaps he himself was becoming ill. 

The second Ardyn felt Y/N’s breath faintly tickle the underside of his jaw, he stopped and let out a disgruntled sigh. “This is taking far too long.” 

“We’re almost there,” Y/N protested, and gestured with their chin to the kitchen doors. All they had to do was cross through the living room space. From Y/N’s perspective, it felt like miles of uncharted territory laid ahead given how much they ached. Nevertheless, they didn’t want to throw in the towel just yet. 

“I don’t understand the insistence of prolonging your suffering.” Ardyn countered, furrowing his brows at them. 

“It’s not that I don’t want your help,” Y/N gritted through their teeth while feeling the scourge slide across their legs. It felt like their skin was being flayed. “If I can’t do this on my own, I'll--” 

“Y/N,”

“Yeah?” 

“While I admire your tenacity, I’m imploring you to let me help.” 

Y/N sighed in defeat. “Ardyn--”

“I tire of hearing you moan in my ear every second.” 

Of all the things he could’ve said, Y/N didn’t see that coming. Sensing his discomfort, Y/N felt blush rising in their cheeks. Whether it was from their embarrassment or wanting to play off the severity of the scourge flare, they felt emboldened to make a jest. 

“You know,” Y/N coughed. “Most guys would be into that.” 

The look he wore was priceless. A mixture of disgust and intrigue traveled across Ardyn’s face, and Y/N couldn’t help but snicker. 

“I didn’t take you for a minx.” Ardyn huffed.

“Between the two of us you’d fit the bill of that better than I.” 

“Oh, that’s quite sinful! It’s rather sweet you acknowledge my prowess.” Ardyn teased in a sinister fashion. 

“I...” Y/N struggled to speak. “I wasn’t complimenting or--” 

“Then what we’re you implying, darling ?” 

He held Y/N’s gaze for several seconds, watching their laughter turn into nervous chuckling. Ardyn couldn’t help but smile at how pink Y/N’s face had become.  When they were at the precipice of expressing fear--at how he lurked over them like a serpent hypnotizing it’s prey--did he strike. 

“H-hey!” Y/N exclaimed, feeling their body and the world shift as Ardyn swept his arms underneath their form. “What do you think you’re doing?” 

“I’m speeding things up,” Ardyn teased, smirking proudly when Y/N instinctively wrapped their arms over his shoulders while he carried them like a newlywed bride. “By the way, you’re quite welcome.” 

“Damn you…” Y/N muttered under their breath, trying to ignore the laugh he let out at their expense. Their pride was wounded, but Y/N would be lying if they didn’t appreciate Ardyn pulling off that little stunt. Their aching body certainly respected what he had done, giving a much needed break. 

As Ardyn walked them both to the kitchen, Y/N felt their face grow warm when they caught a whiff of his scent. He always smelled rich, like sandal and rosewood; strong and earthy. The sweet undertone that intertwined with his usual musk had Y/N feeling an impulse to bury their face into his neck. It reminded Y/N of the fermented smell the scourge gave off, without the rotting stink. Whatever it was caused by, be it the long day at work or if he was trying something new, Y/N felt their nerves tremble as scourge and blood rushed through them. 

“Here we go,” Ardyn’s playful declaration stopped Y/N from succumbing to their urge as he gently plopped them into a chair. He was careful to push it in toward the table once Y/N got comfortable, and he ventured to the chair next to theirs and took a seat. 

Y/N's eyes widened, gazing upon the meal that Ardyn had laid forth. There was a fish of some sort on their plate, topped with a brown butter sauce. It was well seasoned with a nutty fragrance akin to hazelnut. The bed of salad it was placed upon looked just as delectable as the main course, and quite unusual. Y/N could see a mixture of apple slices with gouda cheese, red onion, olive oil, sunflower seeds, and another vegetable that smelled similar to a turnip. 

Y/N had never seen a meal like this before, not at the Gala, and certainly not when Tuti or other Imperial Help delivered meals to the residency. Y/N could scarce believe that Ardyn played a hand in this concoction. 

“What is this?” Y/N asked while using their fork to poke the meat. They couldn’t help but let out a laugh, shaking their head. “This has got to be take out.”

“I assure you, it’s no such thing.” Ardyn chuckled with pride, glancing between the meal and Y/N. “It’s grilled bass, and the salad is made with kohlrabi. I haven’t made this in over 2,000 years. Try it, and tell me what you think.”

2,000 years…?  Y/N almost had the audacity to jokingly ask Ardyn if this was his first time making anything in his life. Alas they relented, but the message sunk in how long ago that was. It certainly explained why the dish looked unknown, and just like it’s creator, otherworldly in a sense. 

At feeling their stomach rumble, Y/N eagerly and with caution took a chunk of the bass meat with their fork and brought it to their mouth. They blew on the meat a few times, feeling the steam rise off the scales before consumption. 

Different tones of flavors exploded against their tongue, and Y/N had no idea how to label each and every taste; for it blended together in a beautiful dance. Their expressions must’ve been concerning, for Ardyn looked worried. That is until Y/N went ravenous and began to eat more of it. 

“Wow,” Y/N murmured in between chews. 

“Well?” 

“It could be poison and I’d still eat it!” Y/N exclaimed in between bites, causing Ardyn to laugh. 

“Where were you 2,000 years ago?” He mused. 

“Somewhere in the dark. Not even an egg or sperm yet,” Y/N teased, blushing when Ardyn snorted at the crude remark. “Why do you ask?” 

“Well,” Ardyn began to carve the meat on his own plate, taking a small bite himself. “This was a poor man’s feast by the standards of yesteryear. Not many cared for it.” 

Y/N furrowed their brows. “I thought you said you were royalty?”

“That’s correct.” 

“But you ate poorly?” 

“Hmm hmm,” Ardyn nodded. His expression softened, almost appearing morose. “When I became a healer full time, I had forsaken royal decadence and relied upon the charity of those I serviced. Many didn’t have the means to pay, so if they offered food and shelter, I took it with grace. Overtime, I grew to love dishes like this one and I learned to prepare it myself.” 

“Why did you put yourself through that?” Y/N watched Ardyn’s amber eyes curiously roam over them. They couldn’t tell if he was intrigued or appalled by the question. 

“I mean, the way you are now or what I’ve come to know of you, it’s like you’re speaking about another person.” 

There was a long pause as Ardyn mulled over Y/N’s statement. He himself was puzzled at his own discernment. Furrowing his brows, he carefully reached for a bottle of wine that was in the middle of the table between himself and Y/N. 

“Do you remember our conversation long ago in Lucis, when you asked how I became as I am?” 

Y/N nodded. Their eyes darted to the wine bottle as Ardyn popped the top open, and poured himself a glass. 

“You said your kindness cost you everything.” Y/N murmured in reply. 

“Correct,” Ardyn met Y/N’s eyes, and gestured to their empty glass, offering to pour a round for them. He smiled faintly when they gave a nod, and proceeded.

“Back then, the blight or what became known as the star scourge made it’s debut when my brother and I were both young men. As it grew, Somnus believed that culling the flock was a necessary evil to prevent the spread. I found through my practice that certain people were predisposed to the scourge, while others were not even if they were around the infected. Alas, they were still carriers. My brother justified more sacrifices because of what I had discovered. Even with the knowledge that I could cure the infected myself, he wouldn’t budge from his stance.” 

Once he topped off Y/N’s wine, Ardyn gently slid the glass to them. “One day, I excommunicated myself from the kingdoms council under the guise that I was going on a pilgrimage, in honor of mine and Somnus’s late mother. I was to be gone for six months, but six became nine and nine became twelve. I traveled across Lucis healing those afflicted; trying to show the people, and Somnus that there was another way besides bloodshed. Hence, I became quite acquainted with peasantry and cuisine.” 

While Ardyn gave no reason to lie, there were some things that didn’t add up for Y/N. If it was true, that he could cure the scourge, then why did he drag them through this whole mess? It was one of the many questions that fired off in Y/N’s mind. They mulled over his story while taking another bite of the fish while he nursed generously from his own wine glass. 

“There’s no cure,” Y/N shook their head. They glanced over him, trying to find a hint of deception behind his confused gaze. 

“Pardon?” 

“How did you heal people from the scourge?” 

“How do you think I became Adagium?” Ardyn huffed with a smirk.

“I don’t know, you tell me.” Y/N countered with a laugh. It seemed Ardyn was more or less amused by the banter. Alas he sighed, as if preparing himself for a long winded speech before the Imperial council. 

“Well, I…” Ardyn bit his bottom lip while contemplating his choice of words. It had been a long, long time since he reviewed his past history. He had purposefully tried to dispose of his old self, letting the daemons inside his body eat away at him, and Ardyn was shocked he had quite a vivid recollection the longer he dwelled on it. 

“If it’s not something you want to discuss--”

“No, no,” Ardyn shook his head, gesturing with his right hand for Y/N to cease. “I assure you I have nothing to hide." 

“I can tell you’re lying.” Y/N snorted. “You’re nervous about it.”

“Am I that obvious?” Ardyn raised a brow. He smiled amusingly, seeing Y/N nod to his remark. 

“I have an idea.” Y/N suggested. 

“Let’s hear it then.” 

“If you don’t think you can tell me in five sentences or less how you became Adagium, then it’s probably something we shouldn’t discuss.”

To say Ardyn was perplexed as an understatement. He chortled before speaking. “I must’ve already drank one glass too many. Did I hear you correctly, five sentences or less?” 

Y/N nodded with a smile. “You sure did.” 

“I’m afraid I’m not following?” 

“In my experience, if a person is open and willing, they can get to their point within five sentences or less. Anything more, and they’re either lying or it hurts too much.” 

Ardyn hummed in thought at Y/N’s proclamation. He took another sip from his wine glass. 

“I suppose this mentality comes from your days as a Scavenger, no less?” 

“You’d be correct.” Y/N smiled, fiddling with their fork against some of the apple slices beneath the grilled fish. 

Ardyn was quiet for a time. Neither he nor Y/N said a word to each other while the latter continued to eat. Once they finished off the fish, and began working their way to the salad, did Ardyn let out a breath. 

“Challenge accepted,” He proudly mused, earning a double take from Y/N. He chuckled at their expense, eyes glancing at his own meal he had barely touched.

“The gods blessed me with the power to cure the scourge at the expense of my own health. I thought it was a worthy sacrifice, to forsake one for the many. Each time I took the darkness into myself, a little bit of my soul withered away. I fought it off as long as I could, but Somnus brought out the worst in me. He took away the only anchor I had left, keeping me human.” 

Each word was a pebble, which evolved into jagged rocks. By the time Ardyn finished his five sentences, Y/N could hear the pain in his voice that he desperately tried to cover with loathing. It all made sense how he got from point A to point B, and it should’ve been so obvious. Y/N felt like a fool for not putting the pieces together sooner. 

“Your anchor was Aera, wasn’t it?” 

The gasp left Ardyn so abruptly, it startled Y/N. They carefully watched him, seeing how every muscle in his body tensed as if he had been struck. The way his eyes bore into Y/N, had them wondering why he hadn’t screamed nor yelled yet. 

“Where did you hear that name?”

“I think I saw a memory of yours this morning.” Y/N replied cautiously. They could tell he was trying hard to keep himself together, and decided not to leave too much hanging for Ardyn’s sake. “After you struck me, I blacked out and woke up to a battle. There was a lot of blood, and I was losing. The man I fought, he was going to deliver the final blow until Aera got in between us. She died in my arms.” 

Ardyn was silent for what felt like ages. He never once blinked nor took his eyes off of Y/N. 

“What did you feel, when you held her?” 

“What?” 

“Answer the question, please.” 

His demand was neither imposing nor was it gentle. Y/N was beside themself while they tried to recollect those tender feelings they experienced. It was so hard to describe, yet the memory felt as if it had always belonged to them.

“I didn’t feel real anymore. All I felt was my heart, and everything about me, shatter. I kept so many from dying, yet I couldn’t keep the one person I cherished most alive. I felt all of Eos crumble in my arms.” 

Y/N hadn’t realized they had been crying until Ardyn had passed them a napkin. They sniffled, feeling their face flush and murmured a quiet thank you under their breath. After wiping their eyes, did they swallow back the remaining tears. Y/N felt foolish. This was after all, a memory of Ardyn’s, but they felt some ownership of the weight. 

“I saw what your friends did to you, back at the Quay. Everything.” Ardyn finally spoke up. It was now Y/N’s turn to handle the shock of such a declaration. He could see the fright in their eyes, and slowly began to regale. “I see why you were so miserable when you showed up to the inn. You really loved them all, didn’t you?” 

Y/N nodded. “And you really loved Aera.” 

Ardyn sighed through his nose. He made a fist, knowing this wasn't something he could shelter away. Y/N knew too much. 

“Was this a bleed through?” 

“Yes, yes it was.” Ardyn admitted. There was no use in trying to lie for the sake of pacifying. He knew deep down that Y/N knew the truth to begin with, but they needed validation for it to feel legitimate. He lingered on what happened in the morning, and everything he had experienced up to this point. 

“Y/N,”

“Yeah?” 

“The sylleblossoms weren’t your fault, nor were they Tuti’s or even Commander Pierce’s boy.” Ardyn averted his gaze, fixating at what was left of his wine. “I had a night terror about Aera, among other things. There was much blood in it.” 

“So the flowers did make you crazy.” 

“I'm not good at apologizing,” Ardyn bit the inside of his cheek, reminding himself that he needed to set things right even if it cost him his pride. He turned his full attention to Y/N, letting the shame that had been bottling up inside of himself come through his tired eyes. 

“I know I’ve attempted to rectify the situation with a meal, but I know that can’t suffice for what I’ve done. A sorry won’t sit well with me, and I doubt the same on your end. So…name anything, and it shall be yours.” 

Y/N was taken aback. “Anything?” 

“Anything,” Ardyn emphasized. “It can be at my personal expense or not. It’s only fair.” 

“Would you mind if we did a raincheck?” 

Ardyn was visibly confused at first. In the rare event he had found himself owing someone a favor, said persons jumped the gun in a heartbeat without thinking twice. There was always something to be gained from cornering the Chancellor. That had been Ardyn’s experience in Niflheim for decades, up until now. Y/N had puzzled him many times, but this was a moment that Ardyn filed away in his subconscious; there was no hidden motive with them. Perhaps there never was. Not even when he was so certain in the early stages of their partnership. 

He searched Y/N for any sign of deception, and alas was met with a smile. It was simple and conveyed enough to give him grounds to return one in favor before speaking. 

“Just say the word when the time comes. I’ll honor it.” 

“I’ll hold you to that.” Y/N mused. Their body tensed for a moment as they eyed the rest of their plate.

Y/N would be lying to themself if they didn’t feel at odds with the situation they were in with Ardyn. They had their share of physical altercations. It was something that unfortunately Scavengers would come across at one point or another, be it petty disputes between fellow workers or fighting off folks who had no legitimate claim to treasures. Had this been anyone else who had struck them down, Y/N knew redemption would be off the table. Had anyone acted like Ardyn, Y/N wouldn’t have stood for it. They swallowed, realizing the vast number of exceptions they allowed for him. The epiphany was both enlightening and held alarming context.

Y/N couldn’t afford to dwell on their leniency any further. Not when the scourge pinched at their swollen eye where they had been hit. They scanned over their plate. For as good as the food was, Y/N didn’t know if they could stomach anything further. At the very least, Y/N decided to eat a little bit more of the salad and finish off the wine; out of courtesy for the labor Ardyn had put into it. 

The rest of dinner went on quietly as Y/N and Ardyn ate. Neither party said a word, nor paid much heed after the conversation died down. It was only when Ardyn saw Y/N displaying obvious signs of fatigue did he finally pipe up.

“Tired?” 

Y/N smiled. “Exhausted and full.”

“That’s quite unfortunate,” Ardyn mused. “I made dessert, but I suppose that can wait for morning.” 

“Well,” Y/N hummed in thought. Their stomach felt like it was going to distend, but much like Ardyn, sweets were a temptation they couldn’t overlook so easily. “Maybe I can have a little bite?” 

Ardyn chuckled, shaking his head. “There’s no need to force yourself. Besides, there is another matter I need to discuss with you before we depart for bed.”

“Oh?” 

“How do you feel about weddings?” 

Y/N made a face, unsure what he was driving at. The question came so far out of left field, that he might as well should’ve asked if Eos was flat or spherical. 

“I’ve…never really been to many. Well, huge ones. I’ve attended small unions before. Why?” 

“You and I are needed for an engagement in Accordo, an arranged marriage.” Before Ardyn could express anything further, he saw the shocked terror that danced across Y/N’s face along with a blush that could rival the richest of burgundy silks that Aldercapt owned. He did a double take, making a face before the dots connected and he cackled like a child who had gotten away with stealing. 

“Oh come now!” Ardyn said in between fits. “I wasn’t implying us!” 

“Oh damn the six…” Y/N let out a breath in relief, shaking their head as Ardyn continued to laugh at their expense. They shot him a glare, their face feeling warm from misconstruing the situation. 

“You know, you could’ve worded that better.” 

“The fault lies with me there, I’ll admit that.” Ardyn snorted. He let out a breath, and smirked. “I suppose it wouldn’t be so bad, considering we seem to know each other inside and out at this point, quite literally…”

“What?!” 

“Moving on!” Ardyn raised his voice with a snicker, taking hold of the reigns before Y/N had the chance to verbally beat him down for the tease. “The betrothal is between an Accordian Senator, and a Niflheim Lead of Office. The Accordo envoys are hopeful this union will quell any rebellious tendencies in their own countrymen. Given the prestige of both parties entering the marriage, the engagement not only requires the presence of my company but that of yours.” 

After Y/N got over the embarrassment of Ardyn’s not so clever flirtation, did they listen carefully. Something didn’t add up for them. 

“Not that I’m opposed, but why do I need to go? 

“Being an Imperial Icon, it’s imperative you attend and leave a good impression; not only to make Niflheim look generous for taking you in, but to perhaps sway public opinion about Lucis and the monarchy.”

“What you’re saying is, you want me to talk shit about my homeland.” 

“Maybe not so vulgar in language, but yes.” Ardyn could see the reluctance in Y/N’s features. “I had a feeling you’d have a qualm, therefore I’ve already put together a script of sorts. We can go over it along with your other obligations this week.”

“Alright,” Y/N murmured. This shouldn’t have surprised them, but there was an uneasiness in Y/N’s stomach that refused to go away.

“Given what I know now,” Ardyn cleared his throat, earning Y/N’s eyes. “I understand this isn’t easy. However, we both have parts to play in this theatrical piece until the dust settles and I can make due on my oath.” 

“Don’t get me wrong, I get it.” Y/N remarked, feeling the weight somewhat shift off their shoulders at what Ardyn said. “That doesn’t mean it won’t be hard. You were once a Lucian. I’m sure it was difficult for you to fully cut ties despite what happened in the past.”

“You don’t know the half of it,” Ardyn replied nonchalant. He let out a huff while his mind briefly recalled his 2,000 year exile, and the months after Verstael had freed him; only to chain him to a different cage. “Be grateful Verstael isn’t the one mentoring you. He certainly ensured my wings were clipped when it came to sentiment for Lucis, whatever was left of my adoration anyhow.” 

“Trust me, between an immortal monster and a guy who ages like a balding goat, I’d take the immortal any day.” 

Although initially appalled, Ardyn laughed at the candid remark. He felt some relief as well hearing Y/N join him in that regard. 

“Ah, you flatter me so!” 

“Eh, don’t get used to it.” Y/N countered with a giggle. 

“I’ll make note of that.” Ardyn grinned. He soon faltered when his eyes locked on Y/N’s. For a split second, there was a look of awe in their gaze that had his knees shudder; as if they would buckle though he was sitting down. It occurred to him Y/N must’ve caught on that something was amiss, for they shyly looked away. 

“I’d…like to try something.” Ardyn whispered, earning Y/N’s attention once more. He himself wasn’t sure where this was coming from, and although composed, inside he was petrified. “Is it alright if I touch you?” 

“Touch me?” 

Ardyn gestured to his own face to emphasize where. 

“Oh,” Y/N swallowed. Their stomach twisted in a painful knot, only soothed by nerves that seemed to be running amok in bliss. The contradiction was so strange. “I guess so…”

“No, this won’t do.” Ardyn shook his head. He scooted his chair so he could get closer to Y/N. Once settled, he continued. “It’s either an enthusiastic yes, or nothing at all.” 

“I didn’t take you for a consent type of guy.” 

“In some circumstances, it certainly calls for it.” Ardyn mused, trying to not venture into territory that could land him in hot water. Although he was certainly tempted to make a flirtatious jest at Y/N’s expense, it wasn’t worth making his heart rock further against his ribs. 

He gestured his hands out to Y/N, palms up, as if he was making an offering to the six; all the while demonstrating there was no weapon to be had. Y/N couldn’t help but notice that some of his fingers were shaking. 

“May I?” 

The softness of his voice pulled Y/N away from studying his palms any further. With another gulp, they nodded before giving a definitive answer. 

“Yes.”

His hands slowly reached out. Y/N’s shoulders tensed as did the rest of their muscles. Their eyes fluttered shut. Trembling, Y/N could feel Ardyn's hands cup their face, thumbs smoothing over fears of endangerment while pressing firmly yet gently against their bruises. They couldn’t help but wince, letting out a pained grunt. Ardyn’s soft hush made the trembling worse, but more so in their legs and feet. It was so strange, the power a voice could have over someone. 

A voice… Y/N furrowed their brows. For the briefest of seconds, they could hear an inhuman sound cradling the inside of their skull. There was no way to decipher what was being said, but Y/N felt on a primal level, that they understood what it meant. The image of Outpost 98 and the explosion flashed behind their eyelids, and then a tender bout of pain radiated against their face; causing Y/N to grimace. 

Before their mind could follow the voice any further down its dark path, they felt something warm under their skin; as if the life force of Eos had been taken into their blood and massaged all the knots and pains away. This felt different from when Ardyn would redirect the scourge. This was something else entirely. 

The chain of events lasted for a minute, but to Y/N, it felt like forever. Their eyes fanned open, meeting Ardyn’s deep amber eyes as he carefully looked them over; his hands remained in place, daring not to let go of them. 

A crooked smile fell upon his lips, and Y/N couldn’t help but mirror him. It was bizarre, seeing him in the state of awe he was growing into. 

“You’re healed…” He muttered as if he himself couldn’t believe it. “I never thought I could do that again.” 

“The blackeye, its gone?” 

Ardyn quietly hummed with a nod.

“How did you--”

“I’m not sure,” Ardyn whispered to himself. He adjusted the placement of his hands on Y/N’s face, brushing some strands of hair out from their eyes before his thumbs began to rub small circles into their cheeks. “Are you alright?” 

“Yeah,” Y/N murmured, faintly nodding against his touch. The sweet scent that had been whiffing off of Ardyn’s body began to make a comeback, and Y/N couldn’t help but lean in. If they didn’t know better, he was having a similar reaction. There was a look in his eyes that was intense, as if he had been put under a spell and couldn’t withhold the reactions his body was going to have. 

Y/N could feel the air from his nose hit their flesh. The hitch in his breath gave way he was inhaling their scent. Somehow, Y/N knew this had to be the scourges doing; drawing them together like two magnets. Fear and something else intertwined in Y/N’s chest as they tilted their chin up, their face gently pressed against the stubble on Ardyn’s cheek. His breath hitched again, Y/N heard him swallow, his fingers shuddered against their face, and then his strong nose brushed against theirs. 

“Ardyn--”

In a split second, the spell was broken and he let go. Ardyn hastily retreated, albeit not in a manner to suggest he was disgusted. His eyes blinked several times, seemingly confused at his actions. 

“I...I don't--”

Y/N breathed out. “That was…”

“Peculiar?” 

“Yeah.” Y/N nodded. 

They both acknowledged one another, as if trying to see if each had been hurt before Ardyn made his move. He let out a sigh then forced himself to his feet and began to gather up the plates and silverware, no longer wishing to indulge Y/N. 

Y/N furrowed their brows. “Ardyn?”

“You go on to bed,” He replied gently. “I’ll get this cleaned up.” 

As much as Y/N wanted to pry further, they found themself frozen; unable to say a word. Whether it was from their own nerves, the scourge bubbling in their stomach, or something else entirely it didn’t matter. Y/N whispered a good night, got to their feet, and somehow through the pain, coaxed themself to return to their dwelling within Ardyn’s residence. 

They didn’t realize he had long stopped collecting the dishes, and watched them walk away. Ardyn's fingers grasped the plates with a firm grip as he fought against calling Y/N back to him. 

[coffeebanana]

I love rewriting. I love it love it love it (even though i sometimes avoid it) because nothing's more satisfying than turning something that's just not quite right, something that just doesn't quite work for you, into something you LOVE

[acid-ixx]

ch.4: again &. again (platonic! yandere batfam x neglected! gn reader)

directory: preq, chapter one, chapter two, chapter three, chapter four, chapter five pt 1

read until the end for an author's note.

tw: self-esteem issues, alcohol abuse, allusions to self-harm.

"baby bird, i know i haven't been talking to you much as of lately. but i just want to let you know that we miss you alright?"

not delivered.

"i really regret ignoring you, we all do. i'm-"

he hesitates, then deletes the last word of his message.

"—we're the ones in the wrong for everything, alright? you blocked me, i'm sure you did for everyone else too, i get that, but we care for you now and that won't change anytime soon. please remember that."

not delivered.

"and it pains me seeing that you're not replying to my messages at all, baby bird. but i promise i'll-"

dick bites his lips at the mistake of addressing himself only rather than that of the family, but a greedy part of him wants you to read the messages and to see only him in spite of everything rather than them, feeling a sense of... need to be the first and only one you see when you think about accepting their apologies, even if he's writing to you whilst simultaneously trying to get his family in your good graces.

dick doesn't know it. why he's suddenly obsessed with you. you? yes you, his stupidly precious sibling, the one who looked up to him, frail and wronged by the world, with so much drive behind that stare. third child of bruce, yet second youngest in the family. the one that got away, the one he has never once saw outside that one memory of glinting, awe-inspired eyes that told more stories than poets, drew more emotions than artists.

nobody saw you outside of your status as the manor's ghost— but compared to your other siblings, he knew you the most. he wants to be the only man good enough to be considered your brother, your oldest brother; an obligation he's willing to uptake just for you. he wants to be the only one with the authority to call you his baby bird. he doesn't know why, despite the thirteen and a half years, it's him wanting, no, needing to see you again.

you, just you.

every bits and pieces of you.

in his mind, it's just him and you. in your tiny little bedroom, with your dozens of sketchbooks and diaries, with only your brother, dick, to accompany you. in your own little world, as you speak to him of your dreams and passions with nothing else in your mind. you'd look up at him with sparkling eyes, look at him like he means everything in the world to you, and he'd see you as his world.

when he thinks of that, the more he hopes of the possibility of you reading his messages; his declaration of never leaving you alone anymore. and with hope comes along this dread that you'd reply with a nasty reply, or that... you'll never bat an eye him anymore.

dick doesn't take a second glance to correct his mistake again this time.

"i promise i'll be better for you baby bird. my little hatchling, my little one. i discarded you, someone so precious. you must've felt hurt, no? i get that, i'm so sorry you have to go through that because of me. but look! you have me now, we have each other now! and that might not be enough yet to mend the bridge i left to fall, but if you just, please reply to me, or anyone else, then we can fix this. i promise, baby bird."

not delivered.

"you won't ever feel hurt anymore, or sad or lonely. hell, even bruce is getting you a new bedroom fixed up, isn't that great!? i'll even convince the old man to make sure your room is close to my old one so you can visit me anytime. i'll even stay over at gotham for even longer, just for you! and i'll spend my time with you, with just the two of us, okay? nobody else can disturb us. i'm sure you'd like that too."

not delivered.

"and we can hang out anytime you want, no? sleepovers, movie nights, journalling— all the cool stuff you wanted to do with me in the past, we can do now! and it'll be fun with you, i can see it happening alrrady, i just know it. you can't convince me otherwise, baby bird."

not delivered.

"that's why i'm begging you to unblock me, little one, or to at least read all my previous messages, please? :( i'm still so sorry over how i treated you in the past. i've nothing to defend myself over how i acted towards you. i was so delusional, ignoring you when all you clearly wanted was to spend time with me, with the family."

not delivered.

"we can even have that dinner together, remember?! at that fancy restaurant you talked about, yeah? my treat, of course. you can order the entire damn menu and i'll leave you room for seconds and desserts. i can even make arrangements to get bruce to rent out the entire restaurant so it would just be the two of us plus the family, but mostly just us— that would be good! then you can sleep at my room after we get home to the manor since we're turning your old one into an atelier just for you! i'll even carry your cute little figure up any flight of stairs whenever you get tired."

not delivered.

"i promise i'll really make it up to you baby bird!!! <3"

not delivered.

"for all the times we neglected you, left you thinking you didn't deserve a spot in the manor (which you truly do, it's us to blame for never seeing it that way), made you feel negative emotions towards us— i'll take your pain and turn that into joy, i promise."

not delivered.

"and if you do manage to read through all this, please remember..."

not delivered.

"i love you so much, alright? we'll find you soon, and you'll be happier with us, i'm sure of it. i love, love, love you so much my baby bird."

not delivered.

he sighs, resigning his thoughts all to himself as he checks his phone every minute for a simple ring of notifications just from you. he prefers to leave his phone in silent mode from the multitude of other contacts bothering him, but god forbade if that means he'd scroll past to a single reply of yours, then he'd rather burn in hell.

and anything is better than the pain inflicted on him when it comes to the thought of you ignoring him.

because after all, he does mean it when he says he loves you, his baby bird, his adorable little sibling.

he'd rather hell than you seeing him any less of an older brother.

what takes longer? is it a seed growing into a bud, a bud into a bloom, or a flower to fully shrivel and die?

how long does it take for it to be considered worthy? deserving of attention and the rightful spotlight to attain its needs for life?

what takes its time? what other variable does it need for it to survive in such harsh conditions? if it's forcefully pried open as a seedling, as a bud growing in a field full of weeds sapping, draining it of its nutrition, or in a scorching, desolate desert, or pestilent lands; would it still be considered a flower?

what does a seed need to grow into a flower? beautiful, treasured, with vibrant colors reflecting off the surface of each petal, growing pollen for every pollinator to spread its bountiful success you call development?

what does it require?

everyone knows the answer, some could only be ignorant enough to turn the other way and reject the idea altogether.

it needs care, nourishment — healthy soil building a strong foundation, its home with roots carefully embedded in the ground, then it also requires water, a source of life given to it in specific times with just the right dose, and sunlight kissing its stems and petals warmly — and finally, love.

lots of love, attention, and patience from mother nature herself and its caretakers we call humans.

but how could a flower receive any, if not, all it needs, if it's raised under a marshy, overgrowth rainforest that speaks of death and cruel poachers that could step on the bloom of any moment?

how could a flower live, let alone survive, if its careless caretakers who took it away from its fertile lands neglect it of its requirements to grow and bloom into its rightful imagery?

just how?

you are a flower.

and you will wilt soon the longer you live in what you once thought was your home.

growing in cracked, dry soil, with no water nor sunlight aiding your growth.

you are a flower.

who had been loved by your creator, mother nature herself; your mother. but you've never once felt the care nor love of your cruel humans you call family, your father had never once saw your budding petals, kissed it, patiently watered or spent time outside in the sunlight with you. your brothers don't notice your dehydrated pets, shriveled leaves and bent stems, nor do they tend to it. your sisters don't decorate the pot you reside it, they don't talk to you every time you sag down in loneliness and isolation as you are forced to stay in the same place and witness the same scenarios over and over again.

not much knows it, but flowers, much like any plant, can communicate, they can feel. and when they do, they do deeply.

and you are a flower. a flower worthy of being pressed into books, storing your beauty forever. a flower worthy of being situated into a stunning arrangements of bouquets, worshipped through birthdays, dates, weddings, and even funerals.

you're a flower, and you're beautiful and deserving of praise and honor from your stages in life as a seed, from a bud, to a blooming flower. yet you're neglected the same way ignorant trespassers would step on growing blooms, uncaring for sabotaging their life completely, and oh-so easily.

you're a flower, a symbol of nature's fertility, resilience, and tranquility.

you symbolize your mother's long standing determination to care for a child whose father looked other ways but her. who raised her seedling with care, watered them with stories of fairytales: fantasies about prince charmings who take their flowers away from barren lands to spoil them with rich soil and neverending sunlight, about princesses who stop by flower shops to awe at the arrangements of bouquets, eyes glazing with fervor as they recount each and every symbolism every unique flower shares.

your mother places you in your favorite, decorated pot: your shared bedroom with her, and she kisses your cheeks, your forehead, your chubby little fingers, the same way the illuminating sunlight kisses at your flushed body whenever you two would go out for your walks.

she was your mother nature, and you were her precious flower.

you were once a blooming bud then, and you wished you would still bloom now.

how could you grow into what you're worth, when even you couldn't grow without the love that was taken from you?

what about the care, the patience, the determination she once held in her warm gaze, now cold and fading with life the last time you saw her; would it all be a waste?

how could you grow now?

and yet you don't even need to ponder for solutions. the answers were clear, clear as the water your petals used to bathe in, clear as the rain that pitters against alfred's car windows the same day you were taken away from your mother's hold—

you simply wilt.

8:31PM.

your friend said she'd pick you up quarter to nine, so you'd at least have the time to prepare and make yourself look good. but right now...

god, right now, you don't feel anything good, not even a wee bit of it at all. ever since he texted you, you feel like shit, utterly repulsed. vile, like the image of you vomiting every contents of your stomach— and now you're going out drinking with an empty one. you can already feel the bitter taste of heavy alcohol mixing in with the acids of your stomach.

you can already feel the breakdown you're having right now as you remember how fucking broke and useless you are for having to ask your friends to treat you to drinking because you have nothing left to offer beyond the fucking taxes you have to pay and the nearly due rent and bills.

you have nothing to offer. you're so shitty. you deserve to die.

the more you stare at the mirror, the more your eyebags seem to deepen, your lips began to dry, and the pit in your chest sunken.

and that makes you exhale even deeper, ignoring the way your throat constricts on itself in instinct.

your eyes flitter to your fingers, nails bitten, skin ripped at the seems with dry blood staining chipped cuticles.

when you looked back at your reflection, you want to cry even more, seeing an image of a moving pile of flesh. all puffy skin and sagging eyes.

you don't remember the last time you felt pretty about yourself.

whether it was in the manor, or back when your mother was the only one raising you— it seems like your memories are in shambles right now.

you don't remember the last time you looked in a mirror, looking healthy, fresh, and proud of yourself for dressing up in your style. in the back of your mind, there will always be hatred, resentment for how you look. and right now, you hate how you every bit of your appearance because...

because you look exactly just like an image of your mother and bruce wayne. a reminder, your punishment for your parents' beautifully tragic affair with one another. a billionaire who courted the lowly dirt-class slut of gotham.

yet you're uglier because you're not them, you couldn't be them. you're not picture-perfect brucie with slick-black hair and a face like fine-aged wine, or the image of your sultry, "man-eater" mother in her lingerie. you're just, you— you've inherited all the stupid flaws you wished you could shave off your damn body.

you remember seeing your father's face in television with your mother beside you by the couch, combing your hair and giggling when your eyes had lit up at the sight of the rich man. you haven't once took your eyes off the news channel whenever he appeared, looking at bruce, always enamored with his aesthetics, only to never notice your mother's tired eyes, or how shaky her fingers would sometimes become.

"momma, that's daddy, right?!" you asked her whilst the side of your body was pressed against hers, with all the enthusiasm a child could muster. your grin was wide, eyes peeled to the screen, enough to ignore the flinch in your mother as you had once thought it was her igniting with the same excitement as yours.

she simply leans down and kisses your cheeks, her eyes, a beautiful shade of your eyes color, albeit lighter in hue, never once left the crown of your small head, ignoring the headline for the news about 'brucie's new fling caught on camera!'.

your mother was so glad you were still illiterate at your age. she wish she could never break off the illusion that it was her who simply birthed to you, with no face for a father. maybe you would've never ask her about why he had never once came to visit your small family, why you could never meet your other siblings, or why he's seen with multiple other women by his side every time you open the television.

you ask at frequent intervals; it makes her wish to strip away the past in which she chose to tell you who your father was. you would've experienced less heartbreak, she would've never seen the way your eyes would dim at her every excuse, or the way she felt your heart crack at the seams, only further breaking hers.

yet after a while, she replies and buries her thoughts, ignoring the tears that lid her eyes. with not so much enthusiasm in her light voice, with the undertones of guilt and sorrow digging deep throat her throat, but it was enough for young, little you to jump on your springy couch with her response.

"... oh, yes, that's your papa...! isn't he so nice looking—?"

"and handsome! i'm so lucky to have such beautiful parents! i wish i was as pretty as you, momma, and daddy too!"

when you had looked up with haste, glinting eyes staring up at her with a wide grin, some baby teeth still present, others absent from your gums, yet you displayed admiration no less; your mother just as quickly wipes her red eyes and sniffling nose with the worn sleeves of her sweater and reciprocates your beaming energy with a small smile.

she wishes you'd dismiss her previous melancholic expression, replacing it with the same fond, yet tired gaze she always offers you, wishing you'd be as oblivious to the pain it brings her to see your hopes and dreams of meeting a father you could only admire through a screen or article. yet you're always so perceptive, so interlinked with her reactions that she's sure that one of the few positive traits your father had given you. she should've expected your words, yet her broken heart finds a path to heal whenever you sense her pain and soft a bandage to the cracks of her bleeding scars with your kindness.

you would always be her little flower. the one she'd nurture in a garden filled with rosy bushes and scarring thorns.

"—you're so beautiful, momma, even if you cry because daddy isn't here with us, or you're too tired taking care of me. you're beautiful because you're my mother, and i'll take you over everything in the world..."

and you tell her, an inaudible whisper to your voice, with eyes that were once wide, beaming with joy, now gazing at her with softness like the wind kissing blades of grass in a gentle dance. you look at her, and she stares back, eyeing your chubby cheeks and lips the same shape of hers, the ends of your lashes curves the same way as hers, and your voice matches her like a lullaby when you speak every vowel in a soothing lilt.

you calm the hurt in her chest, replacing it with a mellow warmth. she even forgot the tears that slowly dripped her eyes, all replaced with the comfortable softness of her precious child's palms, smooth and cozy, resting on both of her cheeks as you pepper her crying face with kisses.

she holds both your palms caging her, and allows the your hold to linger for longer. the silence ensues, yet you both embrace the unsaid assurances.

it's times like these where she realizes you encapsulate the beauty of both worlds.

it's moments like this, she sees herself in you, and maybe she could lead herself to believe that she is beautiful, because she sees her beauty through her child, her grace.

the memory only further deepens the guilt in your heart.

if there's one word to describe you now. it would be disgrace. to your father's honor, and your mother's legacy. for easily letting yourself go, for being so weak, for being the line that jumps between two polar opposites of one another; trying to traverse their path of belonging.

you're a disgrace, a mistake, and you deserve to be treated as such.

it was why you never find yourself beautiful. a person such as yourself would always find allure, worth in all things chaotic - you live in gotham after all - but never find that same value in yourself as you look at your reflection that distorts your image even more, making you uglier and uglier the longer you look.

split ends everywhere, hand tangled, reddish eyes from nearly crying again.

even if you beat at yourself, erratic and impulsive, even if your skin is colored an ashen blue and purple, rotten shades of yellow and red, you think of yourself ugly and repulsive.

no matter how much color you try to bring into your bleak, repulsive life, at the cost of hurting yourself to become pretty— every part of you will always be that ugly, little duckling in comparison of your siblings who always outshone you.

dick with his playboy body, jason and his towering one, tim with soft boyish features, damian's silky tan and smooth skin, and duke's baby face.

you couldn't even have your hair frame you as perfectly as steph's light blonde hair does, or share barbara's proportionate face, or look as gracious yet deadly like cassandra.

you're nowhere near as special, you're not like them. you have features too unique, yet out of place, and you couldn't bring yourself to be conventionally good-looking.

you hate yourself so much. you hate every little mole, every little pimple, every damn imperfection that litter your body, making you even lesser than what you already are.

your family; mother, father, brothers and sisters, god, even your fucking friends! every time you sit by them side-by-side, you'd feel insecure, imperfect, an eyesore and you just want to strip away every part of your limbs one by one if that meant replacing it with even better ones; all for the sake of at least feeling pretty.

you remember the first time you tried to find a sense of style, and damian's comment and– god fucking damn it—!

your hands found its way to your brushed hair, tangling itself through already fragile strands to rip at the seams. you don't care, you don't fucking care, you pray to any god out there to get them out of your head, pleas unheard, you're always left to hurt.

"what are you trying to achieve with that, huh? what even are you trying to think with that horrendous color combination? what are you, a clown? even that damned joker has more coordination than you think you could achieve."

in front of his friend, jon kent, with a scowl on his ever-so angry face and his hand already making a way to grip his sword; an absolute threat to dice you up shall you ever bother being in the same room as him.

he said that to you... you're older, you could've been stronger, could've at least found a semblance of fight in your bones. but no! god, no. your life was ruled with fear with damian wayne being the demon haunting you in the manor, always making living harder, making breathing a heavy task.

how could you ever fight back? not when you've conditioned yourself to tear up at the slightest bit of noise, feel goosebumps prick your skin when you hear someone raise their voice at you, and your heart rate hasten at the slide of a knife against any surface?

you! you who's so fucking weak to even make a comeback. you, who ran away with wide, traumatized eyes. because you're scared, so fucking fearful of an even bigger cut to your skin marked by damian— even if you're accustomed to cutting yourself with even deeper gashes.

because it's him that you fear, not the pain, not anymore. just him and his contempt at you for ruining his pure bloodline just by you being his half-sibling.

you don't want a repeat of your first meeting, or any meeting with him at all. not when you'd drown even deeper in a pit of fear every time you stare at his glaring, emerald eyes. one that tells you he chose to merely not kill you out of the goodness of his heart. but he will, god he will if he feels you've been too comfortable in his presence.

every damn time, everytime you feel fear, you see green. you hate green, any literal meaning of it, every implication of itx even seeing it, and fuck! your outfit has green embellishments.

you feel even uglier, yet the twinge of fear immediately overpowers any concern your had with your appearance. it's as if eyes were suddenly on you, and it's not only yours staring at you in the mirror.

your lips wobble, snot began blocking through the passage of your nose.

fuck, fuck, fuck.

why?! why can't you just forget about them all. why, why, why?!

you bite your lips harshly to conceal the pained whimpers from the back of your throat, but it doesn't work. it only makes the fear worse.

tears rim at your eyes, you merely wipe them away. your heart attempts to beat out of its gilded cage, yet you swallow your quivering chokes and proceed to continue staring at yourself in the mirror, dressed in a rush, with nothing to conceal your ghastly eyebags and sunken skin.

and green. you'll see it everywhere now. fuck, would dick send out damian to kill you now? you don't know, you're scared but you can't chicken out, not when your friend is already near to your apartment. god you wish you had beer in your cabinets instead, but you're broke and unprepared for life and your hair's all in a tangle and you just fucking want to die.

your hands grip at the edge of your sink, you look at your mirror and see the blood on your already bitten lips.

not even concealer can cover the damn scars all over your face all through the neck.

calm down.

you stare even deeper at yourself and ignore the green, trying to think of something else—

something less emotionally scarring, like your appearance. even if it brings you great pain, too, you'd rather that than your family. no more of them, fuck, no more. even if you stare at your eyes and see that familiar mix of colors of your mother and bruce's eyes. the shape of your face, even the curve of your brows all resembled your late mother— and you miss her, her captivating beauty that you never saw aged like fine way before she was taken away from you. you see bruce in the strands of your hair and the way it sometimes fray when too stressed. you see them in every image you wish to erase of yourself.

yet your genetics are nothing to them, not when you can't even care for your tangled hair or ashen skin.

even the dead looked more lively than you ever could.

with a pale complexion, with scars that litter all over your shoulders, wrists, and hidden parts of your body, one you're too ashamed to show anybody— it was no doubt that you looked pathetic and erased the beauty that both your parent's cultivated. and it makes you wonder; would it really be worth it?

would it be worth it if the people around you see you?

you with your melancholic eyes, trying to find an escape in a maze you call your mind? you can picture yourself drinking alcohol until you reach the domain of death, sitting in a stool, alone, as you nearly empty the contents of your stomach remembering the sole reason why you're there in the first place.

would it be worth it if all eyes suddenly were on you? they turn to you to gaze at the ugly bruises on your body, they mock your appearance, call you names, look at your sniveling, red nose and warm cheeks intoxicated from all the heavy liquor you'd down, and whisper. they'll whisper insults, slurs, and every known jab until it's all their words that pierces through your eyes, until the loud bass becomes mere background chatter for all the gossips that ensue.

are you actually going to do this right now?

you don't know, you don't know and you wish never cared as much.

all you could really focus on was your eminent goal of getting out of your stuffy apartment, to rid of the paranoia that somehow, you're being watched over in the confines of your four walls and that the familiar image of green will come attack you. the more you think, the more the hairs on your skin start to raise with every known intention to signal you of your anxiety.

eyes, they may be everywhere.

eyes, eyes, eyes. as you stare at your eyes, you try to ignore emerald eyes, they dilute even further. you gulp, yet your focus remains distorted. images flash at the mirror, and suddenly they're here, with you, with their eyes. bright blue for some, dark green for another, and they all gaze at you with contempt. one's hand claws at your throat, the other pins your wrist down on the edge of the sink. the eyes glare, and they never soften. yours merely shook, unblinking as your breathing becomes heavier; trapped in the cages of their wanton staring.

you yelp, then blink. when you did, they're gone. and you're back to looking at the same image of yourself. you grimace slowly.

ugly, with dry skin and falling hairs. the worst version of you, the normal version of yourself— there was never a best version for you.

as long as it's you, you'll never be enough.

all you wanted was to drink with your friends at a club; some working nightshifts at the location you're going to— yet you want to back down. want to take your phone by the corner of your vision and cancel your sudden plans.

but you're scared, you're so fucking scared of any new messages.

hell, even finding the contacts for your friends was a task in itself you wish to never repeat. with jittery fingers trying to type of messages and blurry eyes navigating through the screen of your slippery, glass screen protector.

you're scared, rightfully so.

you're scared to find his message once more suddenly popping up, your fingers accidentally pressing on it like the clumsy swine you are, and rereading that damn heart over and over again.

you slam your dominant hand against the tiled sink, hard and uncaring for the pain it induced all throughout your body. the tremors of the impact shook you to your core, yet you seethe in your breath and don't allow yourself respite to let the tears flow freely from your already red eyes. you feel your heart beating erratically through your chest, the shivers controlling your body, the shrieks that you contained within you— and you enchain them all with no respect for yourself.

you deserve this. you deserve to be hurt, to be punished for your actions, for your mistakes, for your sins.

even if your hand became swollen, splotched with varying shades of disgusting purples and yellows, you won't treat it with medicine. even if the sharp edges of the sink broke the fragile layer of your already scarred palm, and bled profusely with that familiar shade of red; you won't rush to wrap it with gauze or even spare a droplet of betadine. even if by the next day you'd have to write out your overdue assignments with that specific hand, then you'll force yourself to learn through the other and punish yourself again if you fail once more.

you deserve this.

and as your phone pings, lighting up to show you a notification of one of your friend's messages about being ready to pick you up by the lobby of your apartment's ground floor, you ignore your injured hand and the bruises on your knees from falling so abruptly on tiled floors just moment's ago. you dismiss the ache of your head, the soreness of your eyes and the disgusting beat of your heart.

you ignore the pain that wrecks at your entire body, in favor of destroying it even more, just as you deserve.

you don't recall how many shots you had before you're nearly passed out by the bar, sitting on its stool with your head leaning on one both your arms crossed, drool close to slipping out of the corners of your mouth and heavy eyes lidded, about to fall into the depths of sleep.

you're sure you looked wasted, absolutely drop-dead drunk with no thoughts circulating in your head other than the pleasant buzz in your ears and the flash of colors in the disco balls blanketing the entire room with its neon lights. your face must've been an unearthly shade of red, and you can already feel just how blazen it is, and how your fingertips are ice-cold to the touch (probably colder than the marble you lay your arms upon). in other words, you're actually wasted.

and it's so worth it if it means it gets you to forget. and forget you did, because you can't even dig deep into your head to even remember a single memory of whatever grief you went through earlier in your apartment. not even the throb of your head from when you pulled your hair from its roots, all to the way you slammed your dominant hand on your bathroom sink, bruising it with unnatural shades of purples and yellow.

it makes you omit every type of pain, both physically, mentally, and emotionally. it doesn't cure you of your ails, but god forbid you if you just want to savor moments where nothing but a mind numbing headache is the only feeling present in your current state.

the remix of songs were long forgotten in your mind, they all become an amalgamation of miscellaneous sounds. your body is so inclined towards the flat, rectangular cool surface of the marble glass of the bar that you can guarantee you could sleep here, especially since black behan to cloud both your vision and your mind.

everything feels so hazy, and pleasant, and straight-out peaceful that the screaming tandems of equally drunk clubbers and the occasional sobers holding up their friends who sang along with whatever remix the dj comes up with, or the forming crowd as people began to rock and dance to the bass that shakes up the entire floor to the point you can feel vibrations run along your spine— didn't register within the crevices in your mind.

all you can focus on, is the gratifying pleasure ll alcohol induces in your body. gone is the feeling of fear that emanates off of every inch within your body. your bones don't feel as if it's locking up everytime you feel eyes on you, and your throat doesn't certainly feel constricted with the lack of flow of blood anymore.

god, this is why you've never once regret drinking right after the moment you turned eighteen— not when it's positive effects outweighs all the negative emotions that rule over your body.

you couldn't even notice a man with shades (seriously, who wears that to party? isn't the club dark enough?) sitting beside your drunken form in the corner of your eyes, raptured in the thin line between focusing on reality and drifting off to dream world. you don't even bat an eye to his muffled giggles and the way he twisted his stool just to admire the view: you.

you're oblivious to the entire commotion happening within the depths of his mind because you couldn't feel any aptitude to danger right now— thanks to the effects of the hard liquor overtaking whatever fear you've felt being watched long ago.

or maybe you just felt safe beside the stranger. or, you're merely drunk. you don't know.

fuck, you're so close to passing out.

you don't know where your friends are, where they came running off to but you know you won't be getting out her sooner or later and you definitely don't have a ride home. so your only way back without getting ambushed as a completely vulnerable citizen of gotham, is by a safer, more convenient means of a ride— but that certainly wouldn't be safe if your friends are as equally drunk, or even more so, as you. but does your hazy mind care? no. not when you flip your head to rest on the other side once the other side became hotter that you notice a conveniently attractive man staring right back at you with an entertained grin.

as if your existence alone makes him happy. as much as your mind keeps blanking out, that mere implication made your heart pang just a teensy bit. of pain, or pleasure, or mere joy, you don't know. but you do know that it triggered some unknown feelings and you don't want to feel.

you want to drink some more, feeling solemn all of a sudden just from staring at him. you're sure the obvious frown on your quivering lips and the heavy, hot sigh

and it doesn't help that his face seems similar. the longer you stare, the more his grin seems to sharpen. confidently? or shyly? you can't seem to gain a clear image of him; what when rainbow lights are blazing out through the holes of the disco ball and your eyes recently just opened to your near journey to traverse through sleep.

all you can make out to be is his jet-black hair, side bangs framing the left side of his face, a faint outline of an eyebrow piercing

you also took note of his spiky jacket— yet what draws you the most to him are his sunglasses that he chose to wear conspicuously in a damn club of all places.

he's attractive, to say the least, but he triggers a set of emotions deep into the cages of your imprisoned heart that sets itself free. he gives you a sense of nostalgia, of familiarity that you can't pinpoint but feel; like you've seen him before but don't know when. your eyebrows furrow in and your eyes squint at him, unknowing to the judgement you're subjecting him in. your lips wobble, though, because his presence just makes your heart feel something, akin to pain but not quite, and makes your head buzz that you just want to cry as a reaction.

he, the stranger, don't know it, but he makes you all sad, primal emotions overtaking any drunkenness you feel as deep tremors buzzed into the confines of your chest, until all you're doing is staring at him with pouting, downturned lips and sad, puppy eyes; rimming with salty tears.

you don't know why you feel sad all of the sudden, and you can faintly see through blurry, watery vision how his face shifted from entertained to worry, eyebrows raised and eyes wide open at your sudden mood shift.

maybe you or him could've spoken up, you more so, but you're just so emotionally drained and overwhelmed today that you began sobbing silently without breaking eye contact with the man.

despite you wanting to say anything: an introduction, a question opening up as to why he's staring at you, or even a mere phrase telling him to "back off"; the only words that came out from your parched throat, all from trying to reason in your head on what a proper sentence should be, were:

"you're hot," and if you were sober enough, you would've felt sheer embarrassment and shame from eyeing the boy, but you're not— and because you're not sober, or any bit sane, the next few sentences you spewed out were all coherent, yet wonkily pronounced utterances paired with teary eyes and sniffling nose, as you can't seem to control the feelings of melancholy in your heart and the sudden emotional burst from your ramblings.

"thank you, you too, actually— but are you alright-"

"you're so hot, god, please. i don't know..." you gave him no time to speak as you hiccupped, lips wobbling even more than you can imagine. and you're trying your damn best to rid of the urge to punch at your chest as a coping mechanism through the multitude of emotions eating you up and away. but you never realized you were trying for an absolute stranger, palms fisting into itself as he stares at you worriedly all of a sudden.

"like... you're familiarly attractive, i—" the next few sentences were incoherent as your words bubbled around you like detergent soap. your fingers found itself into your face as you try to wipe off both tears and nearly dripping snot as you continued rambling drunkly.

"you just! you're hot, for me, i don't know... i'm just, we all—eughh... i don't know, i'm so sad..." and you truly are, for no reason at all other than seeing the man. poor him, must've felt so ashamed that he's the reason you're crying but at the same time... nothing can really stop you from ceasing your tears.

at least, that's what you've convinced yourself to believe in. that you're truly incurable of the ailment of being constantly depressed with nobody to aid you with your troubles. not even your friends, nor past therapists that you've consulted.

you've nothing to comfort you, and that makes you even more solemn than ever.

the simplest of emotions felt, the deeper and complex you take it out to be. sadness, or moreover depression, the horseman of apocalypse that destroys any hope you've tried to kindle with your life.

it makes you all the more burst into a wave of even more tears.

"... okay, okay, wait here for me, alright?" he suddenly stood up, hurriedly, probably unsure, or disgusted by you. you're unsure about what he's saying, too caught up crying that you simply nod to whatever he said and continued on with your episode.

as you're left alone, you allow your tears to dry only cry once more. when he left you, you weren't aware but you just felt even more lonely. at pushing away the only company you had after your friends left you in the dust, you feel depressed and regretful and all emotions related to grief and you just want to drink some more but you don't know if you can take it anymore!

god, it all returns to pain. pain you thought you could bury deep once you took multiple swigs of alcohol.

pain that makes you want to bang your head against the marble of the bar—

and you're so close to doing so, but only stopped when your blurry vision sets itself on the man returning with a handkerchief and a cold glass of ice water. at his kind gesture, you simply teared up even more, pouting when he walked your way and looked at you with a sheeping grin.

when he sat right back up on the stool seated to your right, he hesitated with his hold on the handkerchief near your face. but the moment he gathered up his pride and pressed it against the unnatural blaze of your cheeks, you merely leaned closer to his palms, eyes closing as you can feel the tears cease itself finally at the blind comfort he's unknowingly providing you.

"there, there... be careful, 'kay stranger?"

he mutters, a light chuckle accompanying him. it's only now you can finally focus on the cool churn of his voice and the , with your eyes close and the haze of your thoughts washing away, leaving you breathless in your respite— not restrictive, nor lonely, but still short of breath.

this reminds you of the times alfred had to hold you in his arms everytime you threw a tantrum at the manor.

it made you realize that the months, a near year even, after leaving the manor, made you crave physical affection. making you feel like a husk of yourself when not given. you feed off of the scraps of physical lovez to the point that even this man who's wiping away the tears from your cheeks makes your heart beat faster, in a comfortable manner.

sensations. he once told you that if you feel too deeply within, then to ground yourself you must feel beyond interior ranges of emotions.

and that's the technique you've been willing away from your head for so long. because it always requires another person in the room to comfort you, to simply touch you softly, gently like you're porcelain the same way the stranger is pressing damp fabric against your tearstained cheeks and hollowed out eyes.

the pain you've felt was because you're merely touch starved. alone, in a space where everyone has someone, and a no one can't have anyone.

but now that you do have a someone, no matter how dangerous he could've been outside of your impression of him, you feel the pain lessen, the heavy burdens become featherlight at his kind gestures of wiping all the salty tears from your face, the runny snot from your nose with no rush whatsoever.

"feel better now, hon?"

"mhm..." a long, drawled out yawn emits from your mouth, yet you're too comfortable with him to even care, suddenly feeling a wave of drowsiness after your emotional episode.

after he finished wiping your face, and felt it considerably cool down from the damp fabric, he placed it on the bar, one hand on your face keeping you stable. yet his other hand promptly went back to your cheeks.

he chose to do this of his own volitions, even leaning closer as your head finds itself slowly dropping to his clavicle (careful to avoid the spikes from his peculiar designed jacket), looking up at him and staring at his gray eyes.

the man looks down at you as you now realize he's cupping your face. at the implication of your entire ordeal with him, you might've felt flustered sober, but you're just so drunk that any spacial awareness for the proximity between your bodies just disappeared and left you with the need to sleep within the confines of the safety this man left you with.

you don't know it, but yet again the man smiles down at your adorable antics, finding the way you're absolutely trusting of a stranger both stupid, yet endearing. because he's no more stranger, and heaven bless him because he's so glad he's the person who approached you rather than anyone else because you looked so cute, and his crush on you may have lead him to stalk you occasionally just to ensure you're safe— that doesn't erase the gesture that he did it purely because gotham is too dangerous for your own good. and he's glad he trusted his human side of intuition, rationalizing with himself that today just seems to be the day you'd bump into danger if he's not there.

you're so stunning up close... how come tim never once found interest in someone as admirable as you is a mystery. but you trusting a stranger in your vulnerable state is much more.

and he's grateful he's that stranger.

because he may be a stranger to you, but a familiar one. and you feel safe, a feeling you haven't felt in so long that you simply just melt against him like clear putty; because you're transparent with what you feel right now.

and right now you feel warmth. not the uncomfortable one that blazes through your (now) cool face when you were drunk, nor the burning one whenever you thought of your family— but a pleasant one. like sitting near a fireplace as you watch the embers crackle, drinking hot cocoa whilst a quilt covers your body from the cold of the winter. you feel this way at his kindness, at his efforts to help you contain your emotions to a reasonable degree.

"what's your name, kind stranger?" you mutter on his chest (how come your head is laying on it, actually?) hearing the soft thumps of his heart. it's warm, he's warm and every bit of comfortable, as he does his best to move slightly back to remove his jacket and drape it over your body before he could reply to you, chuckling whilst doing so because you looked up at him with your eyes conveying every damn emotion that made you feel soft.

"it's conner, conner kent. call me kon, though. or yours if it's you." he purrs. it took you a minute to register his obvious flirting but what comes after is an absolute flush on your body and you recoiling from his hold as you look back at him, mouth agape. the tips of your ears were warm, and every bit of

an overexaggeration to his flirting, sure. it makes you look less appealing in your eyes, extra sure! but it's been so long since someone last attempted to flirt with you; but most were under the guise of when you were still a wayne and... and not as yourself. you! you who sports so many imperfections that—

"haha! is it strange to say that you look so cute whenever you look at me with wide eyes in the short span of time we just met?"

he slides in through your train of thoughts before you could delve even deeper through self-deprecation. and you're glad that he did because... god, he makes you want to shamelessly gloat as a reply. you've never had someone complement your eyes before, actually...

"i'm..." you look back at him after you stared down at your palms, heat overtaking your entire body. yet again it wasn't uncomfortable, and just the right temperature. you stutter your name afterwards, making sure it's your mother's last name that you highlighted implicitly and not bruce's.

he seems to grin even wider when you introduce yourself. that's when his next reply generally warranted you to nearly burst off your seat out of sheer diffidence.

"well," he says your name, tasting every syllable in his pierced tongue. "your name tastes sweet, dove. but i think your face is even sweeter now that you're not crying — not saying that isn't cute too but you're so stunning now that i look closer at you without any barriers. your eyes, especially, they're like some mix doe and siren eyes, or whatever my other friends talk about in social media. point given, you're drop-dead gorgeous in my eyes."

it all comes naturally from him that your brain merely shortcircuited and fried itself comprehending his message, forgetting you were drunk in the first place replacing it with a flush in your heart, the pit of grief and despair replaced with the lighthearted need to banter or reply meekly at his shameless flirting right after he comforted you.

this is the first time you felt something for someone's romantic gestures, instead of that wave of nausea that accompanies you.

he makes you feel... pretty about yourself. in a good way, in a way you don't feel the need to hide your insecurities for once and instead allow his eyes to flitter around your entire face, analyzing your features because... because he simply makes you feel pretty the more he stares at you.

yet all you did was take his hand on your own, a sudden burst of confidence even you couldn't explain, and played with it, as you pouted in reply before thinking— using his hand-now-turned-fidget-toy — of a good enough response.

you simply said, coughing before continuing, "i don't take back what i said moment's ago. you're hot too, even if my vision was obstructed by my tears."

"oh, really?" he smiled gently and allowed your hands autonomy to play with his. it's like telepathy, he knows it's automatic that you crave physical affection and attention and he's willing to provide you that solace.

"now that you're not crying— you think i'm even more handsome?"

you snort at his question, then took a step back with your thoughts to properly study him. neat, yet messy hair, piercing on the eyebrows and on his tongue (hot), sunglasses and spiky jacket draped upon your shoulders— goddamnit, of course he's hot! and you made it efficiently clear that he is, with your hands fiddling pattern against his soft, yet calloused hands, by squeezing it.

"yes, you are even more handsome, kon..." brief and concise, just how you like it. even if he gave you an entire essay describing you in his eyes, for you, you prefer actions; and you did so by simply being affectionate with the stranger, now acquaintance you have a slight crush on.

you'd never expected this turn of events, but it was a pleasant one and one you'd never really want to trade with anything else now that you've met kon.

so when he opened his mouth to spew something else, your ears perked up to listen and your mind, albeit slowly sobering up, prepared itself to reply to whatever flirting, conversation topics, and anything random it is that he wishes to talk about to you.

you smiled at him whilst he talked, he reciprocates as always.

yet this time, you weren't afraid to hide just how joyous you feel, for once, having a person interested in you not only physically but with your interests, too, as your conversations kept shifting to things about you.

it made inclined to learn about yourself, too. and that makes you happy, and fuzzy in the insides the more he asks you questions beyond your favorites. like in movies, he didn't simply just ask your favorites and you replied with an answer and moved on, no! you both discussed the emotional depth it impacted you with, why symbolism matters so much, and why in the near future you'd both inevitably meet up, you'll both watch it together.

that makes you feel excited.

you even forgot the main reason why you're here in the first place; to drink. now, though, it seems like you just wanted to talk to kon all night long.

fortunately for you, that's how the rest of your night went. with a pleasant buzz in the background, the sounds of remixes all drowned out in your ears as you favor the chatters of the man beside you, with the tremor of his voice a comfortable volume and his tone laced with freshly made honey.

when your friends finally ran back to the bar where you all collectively agreed to meet up at once everyone's shenanigans were finished, they giggled drunkenly whilst some sober ones whistled at seeing your hand unknowingly massaging his palms like a stresstoy and the jacket draped upon your shoulders.

the moment you returned it to him, he joked about wearing it every second now since it reminds him of you, and how it's his favorite piece of attire now beyond all his other clothing. you merely blushed and ignored the cooing of your friends behind you.

you didn't feel concerned over not seeing him anymore, as he had given you a slip of paper with his number on it in through a tissue with paracetamol pills wrapped around it (like the thoughtful gentleman he made himself out to be when he excused himself a second time to get those items, since you'd left your phone with one of your friends; you swore you felt a blush creep into your cheeks and heating the tip of your ears), you instead felt a pang of longing and furrowed your brows, looking at him as if asking if you'll see him around anytime soon as he reciprocates with a sure grin that makes you feel a wave of feather like affection.

he left shortly after, striding to you as your group recollects all your stuff and whispering a, "text you later, dove. stay safe for me, alright? don't let any other strangers get to you."

you're glad this night would end on a good note, willing away any prior doubts towards spending the night in a completely foreign street and expecting fir criminals and thugs to break in but no! you can't help but admit that your new... interest, conner, made your night a thousand times better.

and his little nickname for you... haha, you're so flustered thinking about texting him tonight. you'd neglect your assignments for now if it meant messenging him right after you get home, safely, for his sake.

when your group all came outside though, that's when things shifted.

time is a construct. it's complicated and structured like that as well. it can either be too fast, or too slow. when your friends had taken their sweet time to spend the night dancing about the dancefloor, when you'd taken the precious time to flirt and talk to kon; that's when you all collectively realized that their damn cars were stolen.

the air suddenly shifted to this thick atmosphere when you all stepped out, one that can be sliced through with a sword, and you swore—

god, you swore this night couldn't have been any better with the turn of things, but now. right after you got out the club, it all took a turn for the worse.

this is it.

you're going to die today.

you're going to die, in some dirty ditch, your friends nowhere to be found, with nobody to save you.

nasty bruises already began to form on your skin, one with harsher colors of purple, blue, and yellow on your wrists and other patches of skin; way harsher

the man in front of you was gnarly, but you've no time to judge as he kicks you in the guts.

matted brown hair lay atop his head like a bird's attempt at a near, he has an odor that reeks of sewer rats, piss, and feces, and an unruly beard that houses bits of his leftover.

he holds a weapon whose shape you couldn't make out with your hazy vision, body nearly cramping in on itself once he kicked you again.

straight in the abdomen, with brute strenght accompanied by his worn leather boots decorated with glinting spikes that sparkle under the moonlight's glow.

in the abdomen, spikes.

blood first, then curdling pain next.

no noise rips through your ears, only wringing ever present, but your mouth opens, and you can feel its tender chords crack as a scream erupts from your throat, shrill and resounding from the deepest depths of the cockpit your mouth has to offer you; uncaring for the man in front of who who suddenly covers his ears and grits his teeth, who looks at you like you're mad, yet unlike same way his two other lackeys from behind look at your like you're the creation of carnage itself.

pain shot throughout your body, most especially at the core of the holes that pierced through your clothes and right inside your skin. and as your bulging, teary eyes try to look down with an agape, whimpering mouth, his shoes still connected to your body; you could only hold off so much of that familiar taste of acidic bile paired with that lingering scent of cheap booze.

tears were a byproduct of the misery, as it began to escape from your already puffy eyes. when the man released his legs fron pinning you down, your sobs only worsened as your unpinned, shivering arm try its damned best to cover the already leaking blood.

six holes, the diameter of the more than half of your finger, was what you could make out in your line of sight. the blood that leaked from them looked black, you couldn't find where the gradient of black and red connects, your only certainty in this situation was that you'd bleed to death before help could come to you.

the spikes were as long as a toothpick, a crimson puddle lay dripping on the floor.

your legs were shaking against your will, your eyes frantically search around you yet your pinned once more, his larger body framing against your own, providing no room nor qualms for an escape.

but the only escape you wanted was one from the pain of his pressing against your injury, even more blood spilling out of its confines. your tears only hastened its descent from your shaky eyes.

when your mouth opened for the nth time to wail out, he seethed in a breathe and threatened you, with his breath as vile as his entire being, that smells like every mix of synthetic chemicals from cigarette flavors, all expired, with teeth rotting and sporting yellow and black wallpaper.

gross, so gross. you want to die when the stench hits your nose. you shrivel in yourself, you couldn't breath.

"listen here, little bitch, you quiet down or i kill you. and 'ya either give me everythin' you own in your damn possession, or i'll kick you even more until a thousand little holes will fuckin' make you bleed to death, hear me?"

hearing his statement only made the adrenaline pump even more fight of flight into your heart. but you can't do either, you can't, not when you're still hazy from the fucking alcohol and the self defense tools in your tiny pouch were thrown a few feet away from you.

you've nothing to defend yourself.

oh god, oh shit, fuck.

you want to die, you want to so fucking die than go through the same pain of nearly being abducted or held hostage again.

yet your eyes could only close, your teeth kissing your bottom lips, biting hard to drown out another pained scream. whimpers, god, they're so loud yet you can't help the whimpers and the broken faucet from your eyes. even if you beg your own body to stop, it doesn't listen to the pleas of your mind.

the only thing it can focus on is the pain. recreant, volatile pain.

a moan escapes you, shaky and prolonged. the only other emotion that you could experience after is sorrow.

you didn't expect your pleasant night to end off in such a tragic note, but as your attacker held you by your throat with one hand, a knife pointed against your face, the next that happened was your head slammed roughly against the wall; a dull, beating ache lulling the back of your head after the momentary spark of pain— you're reminded that this is reality, and you're close to losing consciousness quick.

you're going to die.

bloody, a sobbing, dissociating mess, with your thoughts spinning around the same way the stranger and his lackeys laugh — bared yellow teeth, with the smell of ichor prevalent in their clothes, predatory eyes leering at you like you're prey — at your drunken moans of pain.

you're going to die.

"well, you gonna answer me or what, bitch? you wanna die!?"

he shouts you with spit that sprays all over your face, flashing you a grin and by extension flashing you his ugly, bared teeth. some missing were in his gums, others were artificial, most rotten like him.

you're going to die.

alone, in a ditch. bloody, laying in a pool of your own crimson the same way you saw your mother drowns in a puddle of hers.

you'll die like her—

what an honor.

the more you think about the situation, the more you're led to believe that the only way to solve this was through death alone, with no restrictions, no buts or ifs. you've no fight left in your body, or any weapon to fight. you're drunk, defenseless and if you actually managed to escape, you'd still bleed to death in some unknown alleyway. if you're lucky, a stray police may find you and give you a proper burial. but you remember you're in the living incarnate of hell in america, you'll never have a proper death.

this was night in gotham. your death alone only adds to the already astounding high percentages of all the other lives lost to the same twisted fate. you were no different. and to die early than to suffer from torture is better.

i mean, who would give a shit if you die tonight, right? your family— wrong! alfred would panic at your disappearance, but he'll forget about you like he did others, you're sure of it. that's why he still chose to fucking serve the wayne's instead of fully taking your side. if he had to choose between saving you or the people he swore his loyalty onto, he wouldn't hesitate. you're sure. even if the thoughts made the doom in your heart heavier. even if you know your story would never be covered nor acknowledged, you still year

but life is unfair, everything is. that's why you're here now, in a dark fucking alleyway with men who'll more than take advantage of your dying body and leave your corpse in the dump after. life is unfair, yet it's even more cruel in gotham. you should've expected this, should've known that a turn of events could be possible. you'll feel regret in the afterlife, only for a life that could've been well-lived, but never for the choice of living through the torture you call being a wayne.

so you came to the conclusion; confident for once after living for thirteen and a half years walking on eggshells around a manor.

this is not as bad as their neglect.

you smile in response to the guy, genuine and filled with grace as your heart that once pounds against your chest now slows down to a calm pace, finally at peace. with no other intention than to rattle him even more, to the point of choosing you to kill with his own hands as brutally as he likes— so you finally take a well deserved rest from life.

you gather saliva at the center of your tongue, ignore the taste of blood that swirls, nor the soreness of your throat and the crimson dripping down your nose.

when he looks down at you, disoriented at what you're doing, you spit at him, all the beating in your heart hastened, yet slowed down as quickly as you heave in a final breath.

... you're finally going to die.

"FUCKING HELL, YOU DAMN CUNT—!"

you close your eyes, bracing yourself for the knife that would hopefully stab you in the face, or the chest, and think of your last thoughts. you thank alfred for caring for you for those thirteen years, you hope you win your mother's graces in the afterlife even if she discovered your deliberate choices for killing yourself in the spur of a moment, and you wish your old family a happy life living without you, even if they already did so for so long.

all you needed was seconds to conclude your prayers.

but they weren't answered as you wanted them to be, not when you open your wide eyes to what was supposed to be a glint of silver piercing through the middle of your face was replaced by a bullet, quick and precise, shooting through his cranium without mercy, body immediately laying limp within those seconds.

the other two behind him were good as dead, too, your savior not wasting any moment to end their lives then and there.

and as you stumbled from the grip released from your body, your torso nearly crumpling in on itself, a flash of familiar, metallic red enters your vision when you'd look up from your savior who's huge form now meticulously acts as your shield from the brutal carnage that lays upon your line of sight and a pillar of protection trying to help you stand from the pain that shot through your lower abdomen.

but you don't want to stand, you want to drop dead right now. you don't want this, you didn't want this to happen.

instead of gratitude, dread fills your lungs with water and your fingers were left to tremor.

he looks down at you, you couldn't make out his expression, but you could feel the anger coursing through his body, the same as the day you first met him when he was still newly rebirthed, like it's telling you of his unadulterated rage at witnessing the scene before him. his body shakes, heavily, and his grip on your hands tighten, a mechanical groan drawling deep from his automated voice banks that changes his voice.

yet all you feel was fear overtaking your entire body prior to the comfort at the prospect of death.

you'd rather die than this.

even you couldn't believe the whimper of his name from your wobbling lips, as your body, out of instinct despite the pain, tried to push itself against the wall, away from him.

he only moves to hold your waste protectively, like a... brother suffocating his younger sibling with blankets when they complain it's cold. overbearing, disgustingly affectionate; you don't want it.

you feel cold.

this day could've been any worse— and it took a turn to the all worse scenarios you could imagine.

"jason...?"

"angel..."

a single familiar name was spoken, yet a new nickname was introduced. angel: the same way jason swore what you looked like when he sped through his motorcycle after hearing a shriek from all across the streets, finding you, bleeding and beaten to a pulp, with your attacker almost stabbing you.

of course, who wouldn't hesitate pulling a gun against someone trying to kill your precious? jason doesn't even need to choose.

and whether he did it in the name of justice and respect to his moral code, or because finding someone with a familiar face, sharing the same hopeless, yet death-accepting expression as he did back when he died— it all doesn't matter in the heat of the moment now.

what matters is that his angel is hurt and the madness in him festers the longer you bleed out in his arms, defiant and fearful all the same.

reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.

PLEASE READ: 11,000+ words. AND I LITERALLY HATE THIS CHAPTER (new least favorite fr) 😭 this decision is so impulsive i gonna regret it soon. chapter 5 will be released after a few days and i promise it has more action than this I SWEAR. first parts are always boring. anyways, there're so many song references in this chapter and for the next chapter. if any of you could guess what they are, i'll be rewarding all of you with something special. otherwise, please leave comments for this chapter! what motivated me to write was reading everybody's comments and inputs, about the love they have for this series as much as i do. interactions, asks, comments, they're all important and dear to me and i heavily appreciate it. so more interaction = more content. after all, i'd rather a post with little likes but with no interaction than a post with no interaction but all likes.

otherwise, i can't add anymore to my taglist so taglist requests are closed!

taglist: @lilyalone, @secretomelettetroops, @earlqurl, @simpingfor-wakasa, @amber-content, @ruiroku , @okaybutfullhomo , @trasshy-artist , @obsessedwithromance, @jjsmeowthie, @fairy-lenaa , @ilovvmyhusband , @6uuyuuhgy, @plsfckmedxddy, @lavender-moony , @sweetheart-era, @chemicalsandghosts , @darling006 , @starringyau , @samanthahanes, @rosecentury , @jaythes1mp , @pi1nkl0ver , @i-thirsty-boy, @sharks-are-cool-l, @silverklaus, @traumaramacenter , @maddimoon , @anxrq, @thedarknesslord , @h0rr0r-10ver-69 , @lazy-idate , @cupids-pretty-boy , @alishii, @mel-star636 , @sitepathos , @freakyotaku059-blog , @dirtydiavolo, @sunbleachedantlers, @24hrsoflanii, @ceramic-raven , @une-lueur-dans-la-nuit , @tdickensstuff4 , @thickerthanthieves , @arlandvery , @distressed-lezbo, @bunbunboysworld , @bellethesleepypotato, @nebuluma, @alliwantisadonut, @alishii, @kusakiguzen, @sirenetheblogger, @emmbny, @ryukyuin, @solkara, @starsdotalk, @nightstarblue, @huhuhhuhh, @shadowpup163, @sunshine-skz, @24hrsoflanii, @bazellawrites, @pato-spoiler-27, @harumy07cat, @rains-mae, @funnybunnyxxx, @littlelilithspost, @howisgroguthiscute, @yuyuzi-ling, @tullipam, @coldcrusadehideout, @princessloveweird, @hybridcon

[pygmi-says-hi]

writing tips - sick/poisoning fics

so since you guys ate up the injury thing like holy fuck 1.5k notes in 24 hours??? hello?? I thought I'd do a semi-related one about sickness.

disclaimer because you guys thoroughly reminded me of this: medicine is fucking weird and everybody reacts differently. this is blanket statement information, not the mayo clinic. idc that 'oh my cousin had that disease and he didn't have that symptom' okay whatever like sorry but that's not the point of this post. this is just to eliminate egregious mistakes. I'm not looking into every possible way this illness will show up. chill your tits. the comments on the last post were just like. dude. chill.

aurkay so.

poison-related illness.

okay poisoning is such a cool concept and there are literally so many cool effects it can have. Idk why everyone goes with the holy trinity of hallucinations, fainting and nausea. like yeah those are good but there are so many other things???

like internal bleeding. literally the best. I love it. It's slow but hella deadly and sometimes people can't even feel it/don't know what's happening. that's such a great option for whump or some angst. like they didn't know until it was too late. gold.

also - some poisons are not dissolvable in food or drink. Like certain medicines, they lose effectiveness if digested instead of injected intravenously. obviously you don't have to know that but if you wanna get into it, do a lil bit of research. could bring up some intriguing scenarios.

infection or sepsis

yoooo. sepsis is lowkey terrifying. infections are similar to actual illness but are caused because of an unsanitary wound. lots of interesting symptoms to browse here:

fever, cramps, fainting, hallucinations, dehydration, delirium, nausea, sores, sepsis, organ failure and on and on and on.

infection happens so fast too. like forget to change a bandage once and boom it could be infected. (is that a whump opportunity I hear...?)

sepsis is like the point of no return pretty much. Unless you've got crazy medical technology, sepsis is really really bad. basically, it's when the body overreacts and starts to damage its own tissue. leading to organ failure and then eventually death. spooky.

regular illness

this just means like a virus or something. a key point of viruses is an elevated temperature and dehydration; the body's primary responses. burn the bug out and dehydrate it.

depending on the illness, symptoms will vary. respiratory infections or viruses involve congestion, coughing, sore throats, a rattly breathing sound, and productive coughing (phlegm and mucus). Stomach illnesses include cramps, nausea, dehydration, dizziness, low blood sugar, weight loss, and diarrhea. these can overlap but mostly those are the groupings.

with fevers come achy joints and sensitive skin. fever is inflammation, like mild swelling everywhere because of how intense the antibody reaction is.

dehydration sets in really quick. really bad dehydration induces dizziness, nausea, diarrhea, delirium, lethargy, and fainting. great motivation for a whumper to possibly restrict whumpee's water intake...?

just some prompts! kinda low energy today sorry I haven't been posting, xox

[jexnkookie]

The Law of Attraction (Lawyer!Jung Kook x Reader) [Part 1]

Story Synopsis: Throughout his life, Jung Kook has only ever loved one girl. Despite her being out of his league and of an elite class that he wasn't born into, he fell hard, keeping his feelings a closely guarded secret. When they parted ways, and Jung Kook pursued his law career, he did so with the intent of moving on. But when she unexpectedly arrives back into his life, Jung Kook finds himself once again face to face with his own insecurities, and the girl of his dreams.

Story Rating: M (18+) [Language, sex, depression, alcoholism] Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut

Characters/Pairings: Lawyer! Jung Kook x Reader (feat. Jimin x Reader)

Chapter Word Count: 2.6k

Authors Note: I have this listed as "part one", because I may want to continue it in the future! This is just an idea that I've had floating around in my head, and I really haven't been inspired to write more of my other story lately, so why not put this out? If you'd like more of this story, please let me know and I can possibly continue it, if it's something y'all are interested in!

(It got another part)

Next Chapter

Series Masterlist

New York City is always bustling on a Monday morning. Crowds of people piling onto the sprawling connection of subway, buses and sidewalks on their way for another week of hard work. Jung Kook was among them, wearing a discounted, freshly pressed suit, and a fresh cup of Starbucks coffee in his hand. AirPods in his ear, he let the newest pop playlist cover up the sound of the crowded street on his way to his new office. There was a little, barely noticeable pep in his step, hinting at his excitement for his first day. 

His office building was rather large, even by his own metrics. Coming from Seoul, Jung Kook was no stranger to towering buildings, but this fresh law office had something glistening about its structure. As he entered through the front rotating tour, scanning the pass in his lanyard to be let in, any seasoned attorney would quickly recognize the wide-eyed young man as an ambitious rookie. 

“Jung Kook!” A voice called out from across the lobby. Jung Kook stopped walking and looked up, scanning the room to see Mr. Kim Namjoon, one of the best defense attorneys he’s ever had the pleasure of meeting, greeting him with a dimpled smile. 

“Good morning, Mr. Kim!” Jung Kook responded, quickly making his way over to greet him. 

“Aish, Jung Kook. Call me Namjoon.” He smiled shyly. “We’ll be working together as partners, I won’t be just a mentor to you anymore. I want you to feel comfortable around me.” 

“Right, of course.” Jung Kook grinned. “Thank you for bringing me here, I’m really excited.” 

“That’s great to hear.” Namjoon’s voice was warm and sincere. “I wasn’t sure how’d willing you’d be to leave Korea, but I’m glad you’re here.” 

“Yeah, it um…” Jung Kook pauses, thinking to himself for a moment for the right words to say. “It was a move that was for the best.” 

Namjoon kept a smile on his face, but furrowed his brows just briefly as he read into the younger man’s explanation. Not wanting to press too much, he motioned Jung Kook to follow him to the elevator. They walked together with comfortable conversation, questions about Jung Kook’s move to the city and his commute. As the elevator took them high above the rest of the city, Jung Kook’s finger absentmindedly tapped on the coffee cup he held, jitters taking over. 

“We had a case come in that I think you’ll be perfect to help me with.” Namjoon said, leading Jung Kook to his new office overlooking the city. There was an unorganized set of case files already on the desk. “You can put your stuff here, please make this space your own. The case is centering a Korean family, actually, so I thought maybe the two of us could connect with them on that level. Wealthy family, they’ve been doing business in the States a long time. But the son of the founder just recently inherited the company, and he’s being accused of defrauding investors. I need you to look over the case, and tell me what you think.” 

Jung Kook nodded as he took his seat at his desk, opening up the file to read the defendant’s name, Park Jimin. The name sounded oddly familiar to him, but he brushed it aside as he read the details of the case. 

“…Coaxed into investments using fraudulent and misleading data and projections…” Jung Kook read out loud, under his breath, before looking up at Namjoon. “So, he allegedly massaged the numbers into looking bigger than they are, leading to an increase of investments.” 

“Hm.” Namjoon hummed, leaning against the door frame. “Then when the actual numbers came in, and they were nowhere close to what he had projected, he didn’t have the money to pay out. Now it’s our problem.” 

“Yeah, ok.” Jung Kook nodded. “I have some ideas but I’d like to ask him some questions.” 

“Perfect. I’ll give you his contact info, but he should be flying into the city tomorrow. He wants to meet with us anyways, he just needed a little time.” 

“For what?” 

“He recently got engaged.” Namjoon responded nonchalantly, scrolling through the contacts in his iPhone. “She comes from a wealthy family from Busan, apparently. Their fathers knew each other, since they’re both from the city..” 

“Oh, they’re both from my city, I knew his name sounded familiar.” Jung Kook acknowledged. “Since her family is wealthy, maybe I’ve heard of them, too. What’s her name?” 

“Aish, I can’t remember…” Namjoon thought for a moment. “Mr. Park mentioned her, and now my mind is blanking.” 

The two startled when Namjoon’s phone rang. Namjoon apologized before stepping out to take the client’s call, leaving Jung Kook with his case files to further review. The rest of the day passed for the new, young lawyer, buried in a mountain of papers and taking notes. Namjoon peeked into his office on occasion to bring him coffee, or chat, or ask him about the case. But it was a slow, calm first day. 

As was the next day, and the day after that. Jung Kook got into a routine as the weeks passed, feeling a growing sense of familiarity with the way that he was able to bury himself in his work. It was a nice way to briefly consume himself and chase away the loneliness of the last two years of his life. 

He slowly made friends at his new firm. Never the extrovert, he was shy at first and afraid to open up. But knowing Namjoon for several years gave him a foot in the door, and allowed him an entry way into conversations that he wouldn’t have had otherwise. They asked about his life back home, and never dug too deep when he gave vague answers. He appreciated that, and his colleagues grew to like the handsome young lawyer. 

Finally, on a Friday, as the week was winding down and Jung Kook was thinking of possible weekend plans, Namjoon quickly walked into his office after a brief warning knock to his door. 

“We have a surprise meeting with Mr. Park.” Namjoon explained. “He just flew in from Seoul with his fiancé, and called me to say they want to meet with us. They’ll be here in a few minutes, so grab your notes and meet me in the conference room.” 

Jung Kook’s eyes widened and he responded with a quick “ok”, before gathering up his collection of papers into a manila folder, and walking to meet Namjoon, stopping momentarily only to grab another quick cup of coffee to make sure he was alert. Being his first client meeting since joining the firm, he wanted to make sure he was at his best. 

Settling into the conference room, Jung Kook looked over his notes, and made sure to have a pen to write down anything he may need later. He could see a light reflection of himself in the wall of windows facing the rest of the office, which he used to make sure his hair and suit looked presentable. He was hoping that with the money he made off of this case, he could buy a new, nicer suit like the one he saw in a shop window that he passed by not long ago. 

His thoughts of a modest suit however were quieted by the presence of what he knew immediately to be his client walking down the office halls, nearing the conference room. Dressed in a luxurious, designer black suit and Louboutin loafers, Park Jimin was striking at first glance. He hid his eyes behind black sunglasses despite being indoors, and his dyed blonde hair complimented his glowing complexion and lush, pink lips. He looked expensive, the textbook definition of an heir. 

The woman by his side looked gorgeous, Jung Kook thought. She was also beautifully dressed, in a sharp, maroon pencil dress and heels, with sunglasses also covering her eyes. Her Chanel bag dangled off her shoulder, her head was down, and her hand was intertwined with Mr. Park’s as they walked.

“Good afternoon, Mr. Park.” Namjoon greeted with a bow as he opened the door for the couple. “How was the flight in?” 

“It was excellent, thank you. Please, call me Jimin.” Jimin responded, taking off his sunglasses, before turning his attention to Jung Kook. “Hello, I’m not sure we’ve met.” 

“Jeon Jung Kook. I’ve just recently been added to look over the case.” Jung Kook smiled, standing up from his chair to bow. “It’s a pleasure.” 

“Park Jimin.” Jimin introduced himself. “And this is my fiancé, Y/N.” 

Y/N. Jung Kook repeated in his head, his eyes widening. It’s not possible. 

You took off your glasses before bowing to Namjoon, and raised to meet Jung Kook’s eyes. Your expression matched his own, recognizing the man instantly. 

“Jung Kook?” You smiled warmly. “Jeon Jung Kook? Oh my God, what a small world!” 

“You two know each other?” Namjoon asked with a raised brow. He looked over at the young lawyer, who was staring at you with large eyes and parted lips. 

“Jung Kook is an old classmate of mine.” You explained to Namjoon and your fiancé. “We went to the same university ages ago, when we were still living in Busan.” 

This was Jung Kook’s worst nightmare unfolding right before his eyes. Here you were. You. Just as warm, beautiful, and personable as ever. Just as clueless as ever. It was amazing how you could be such an angel, but put him through so much pain, and not even know it. 

“How have you been?” You asked with an innocent, bright grin. “I haven’t seen you in so long!” 

“I-I’ve… been good.” Jung Kook stuttered, causing the other men in the room to look at him with growing suspicion. 

“Honey, I don’t know that you’ve ever mentioned a Jung Kook.” Jimin said in a sweet tone directed at you, while his eyes judgmentally looked Jung Kook up and down. Namjoon nervously watched the interaction, waiting to bud in at any opportune time. 

“We just had a couple classes together.” You explained. “Jung Kook, wasn’t it um…” 

“History.” He finished your sentence, quicker and more deadpan in his tone than what he meant to. “And our political science class.” 

“That’s right!” You nodded. “I remember you were always so smart, I guess it makes perfect sense you practice law now.” 

“We’re happy to have him on the team.” Namjoon interjected, walking over to Jung Kook’s side of the table. He noted how Jimin still seemed unsure of Jung Kook’s mannerisms, and wanted to press on with the meeting. “Let’s get started, I’m sure the two of you have plans for the evening.” 

Everyone took their seat, and Jung Kook stared at the blank notepad in front of him. He could feel Jimin’s eyes on him, but pretended not to be bothered. He scribbled down the date on the paper, desperate to not meet the client’s gaze. 

“So, we reviewed the case.” Namjoon began, seeing how Jimin’s death stare didn’t shake from Jung Kook as he spoke. “We think that we have an excellent shot at winning, and to be completely honest, we’re expecting the judge to throw the case out.” 

“That’s great news!” You said excitedly. “Honey, you’ve been so worried about this.” 

Jimin looked at you, his eyes softening and a soft smile appearing. He rested a hand on your thigh, and looked over towards Namjoon. 

“That is great news. Thank you, Mr. Kim.” 

“Jung Kook has been reviewing the case for several days now, and he put together a couple arguments that we’ll present to the court, and have this ordeal finished, so you can move on.” 

“Y-Yeah, so um…” Jung Kook started, the weight of everyone’s stare feeling heavy and thick in the air. He was careful to avoid your eyes in particular, sure that his reaction would be less than professional. “First of all, the numbers allegedly presented to investors were never your numbers, Mr. Park, they were the numbers that your father had supposedly projected. The suit is filed against you, not the company, so we can argue that you cannot be held personably liable for any losses. A-Also, there’s no um… There’s no physical evidence of these exact projections being shown that the plaintiffs presented so um… We could argue insufficient evidence.” 

If Jung Kook were brave, he’d look up from his notes to see the way you grinned at him with the same, beautiful smile he used to see walking across campus every day. If he were brave, he’d tell you how beautiful that smile, and the rest of you, have always been to him. 

If he were brave, he would’ve told you that a long time ago. But Jung Kook has never been brave. Not then, and definitely not now. Not when his client is shooting daggers at him from across the table, and a sparkling 24k gold and diamond on your finger reminds him of the thing he’s always known; you’re too good for someone like him. You deserve more. 

“I think that sounds like an excellent plan.” Jimin said calmly, eyeing the young lawyer up and down, before turning his attention to you. He tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. “I think Mr. Jeon has this whole thing figured out. What do you think, darling?”

“I agree.” You blushed at your fiancé’s uncharacteristic public affection. “He’s always been so smart.” 

“It seems so.” Jimin responded. “In that case, I believe we can wrap up this check-in meeting. I’d like to take my love out to dinner tonight. It’s her first time in New York City.” 

“Is it?” Namjoon’s voice was pleasant but quick as he spoke. “Well, let’s not keep you two waiting. Thank you for coming in, and we’ll be in touch. Please, Mr. Park, don’t be afraid to reach out to either of us if you need anything.” 

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Jimin said, getting up from his chair and helping you out of yours before bowing to the lawyers. 

“Jung Kook, it was so nice to see you.” You said, waving at him while Jimin placed a hand on your back to lead you from the room. “Thank you for working on this for us.” 

“O-Of course.” He bowed. “You two have a nice night.” 

With that, Jimin led you away from the room and down the office, and Jung Kook watched as he took your hand in his and caressed your skin with his thumb. It amazed him how even after all this time, seeing you with another man makes his chest ache. 

“So….” Namjoon’s irritable voice said, leaning against the table. “You want to tell me what the fuck that was about?” 

“It’s nothing.” Jung Kook responded quietly, cleaning up his papers to avoid making eye contact. “Just an old classmate.” 

“Nothing?” Namjoon asked with a scoff. “Our client just burned a hole through you with his glare the entire meeting, and you want to call that nothing?” 

“I want to go home.” Jung Kook said with growing frustration. “I promise, it’s nothing. It’s just been a hard first few weeks, ok?” 

Jung Kook was headed out the door quickly, when Namjoon grabbed his arm to make him stop for a moment.

“If something is going on with our client’s fiancé… if there’s a history there or whatever, you need to let me know so we can manage this. We can’t lose Jimin as a client, we’d both be out of a job. He brings in too much money.” 

“What, does he get into this type of shit a lot or something?” 

“What do you think?” Namjoon asks. “It’s part of the job, dealing with rich clients that have more money than sense. They didn’t teach you that in class? Or were you too busy ogling her?” 

“It’s really nothing.” Jung Kook said, this time more calmly through gritted teeth. “I just need to go home.” 

Namjoon sighed as Jung Kook left the room, and cursed his luck with the obvious situation under his breath. 

[hitomisuzuya]

Hellloooooooo😖

This is my first time sending a requestttttt-

Before I ask, I hope you're happy and doing greatttttt, I wish you have a great, wonderful, and lovely day tomorrow!! I wish you the best!! I love you and your workkkk, advanced happy birthday to my favorite writer🫶🫶🫶!!

I was wondering if you can do a Yandere Scaramouche with a fem reader where she got kidnapped by him, and when she woke up, he was about to tell her that struggling is useless because she's tied up- but was surprised that she didn't even struggle at all.

He thought that she's only trying to get his trust so that she can escape later on- but when he saw how she seems to reciprocate his actions, and even initiates them sometimes.. He eventually trusted her-

The rest is up to you-!!

(I hope I didn't yap too much😖😖😖

English isn't my first language, I'm sorry if my grammar is bad-.. T-T

And also, to be specific, please make it smut-

Feel free to ignore this if you don't feel like writing it<3!!

Again, I hope you're doing great, take care of yourself, love you, bye bye-!!🖤🖤🖤)

Yandere!Scaramouche x fem!reader. Smut Kidnapping. Drugging. Bondage. Degradation. Praise. Creampie. Obsessive/possessive behavior.

Porn with plot this time. This might be a bit longer than I anticipated cause I wanna work on dialogue and detail. I enjoy writing Yanderes ❤️ Smut written while sick, so bear with me🥺

You are way too good for this world, and certainly way too good for the likes of Scaramouche. He knew this. However, this was for your own good. You are strong, but that's exactly why you needed him to protect you. He had to get to you before the unfortunate dregs of life broke you down. Sank it's claws into you, and broke you into a bunch of unfamiliar little pieces.

He more than had experience in the regard.

Scaramouche spent months preparing for this. What he didn't expect was what happened when you finally woke up. The confusion was evident in your eyes when they opened, blinking a few times to focus your vision.

"You are awake," His voice sounded like velvet in your ears, your gaze snapping to him, "Before you woke up, it was real treat for me, you know?" He walked over to the bed, "Getting to see what you look like all tied up for me," His fingers brushed one of your wrists, "Though I am starting to wonder if blue would look just as pretty on those delicate little wrists of yours."

It took a few moments for everything to catch up with you. Your breath hitched in your throat, a shy embarrassed blush that he often craved to see coated your cheeks, your eyes glancing up. Your wrists were tied together and to the headboard with purple ribbons of silk. "What's happening?" You asked a little weakly.

Scaramouche was surprised at the blush. He cleared his throat. "A valid question. I kidnapped you. You dropped like a brick after I drugged you. I may have used a bit more than I needed, but you haven't been sleeping well lately," He replied, matter of fact.

You sighed softly. "Okay," You nodded, adjusting yourself on the bed a little.

Scaramouche raised an eyebrow. What was with you? What was up with that blush on your cheeks? Why were you being so calm? Why didn't you flinch away from the touch of someone who'd just drugged and kidnapped you?

Did he dare think you'd thought about being tied up for him?

"There is no use in struggling," He added, to which you only looked calm. He put his hand on your cheek, waiting for you to shriek and shy away from him.

Looking into his electric eyes always made your heart shake. "But, I'm not," His breath hitched in his throat as you turned your cheek into his hand.

"Yeah, you aren't. Now," You were no doubt trying to lure him into a false sense of security. That was usually the go to strategy for anyone who got kidnapped.

Perhaps he would keep you quiet with the few extra doses of sedatives for the first few days.

"Fine, leave me tied up for awhile. When you feel comfortable, untie me. I'll prove I won't run away," You said, giving him a soft smile that made him grit his teeth, "I promise."

Scaramouche flinched hearing the words I promise. So, he tested you. Boy did he test you. He would leave little traps to see if you would leave. He left the door unlocked. The windows open. He even left the damn door wide open. And yet when he returned, there you were, waiting for him.

Was this what love and loyalty looked like in another person? Did he finally understand what those things met?

The more he pushed his boundaries to see if you would break, the more you seemed to accept him. He got handsy and grabby with you, holding you down while he pressed lustful, harsh kisses to your lips. His teeth biting at your lower lip, his fingers brushing over all the intimate places he wanted to sink his teeth into.

Scaramouche was drowning both you and him in the obsessive passion he felt for you. And you accepted every bit of it. Even felt comforted by it. And when you said, "I want you to touch me. I want you," crawling to straddle his lap and nuzzling your cheek into his neck, every last bit of control he had shattered like glass.

"Say it," He hissed, his hand gripping the headboard tighter as he drove his cock into your sweet spot, "Tell me you want me while I make you cum on my cock, slut," He groaned, trembling as he felt your gummy walls clench on his cock.

If you could touch him, you would've. Your hands were tied above your head to the headboard, one wrist wrapped in purple silk, the other wrapped in blue (he couldn't make up his mind). "I want you, Scaramouche," You moaned, rocking your hips up to help push his cock deeper inside of you, "I want you so badly. I always have."

Fuck, your moans sounded so fucking sweet. It sent him reeling that someone like him could make someone like you, the purest thing in this world to him, moan so lewdly. Your weeping, abused pussy sucking his cock in. It was all so fucking addicting.

He drank in the sight of you, twitching and writhing underneath him, ribbons rubbing against your wrists from the force of his thrusts. Your eyes half lidded, and drool pooling from the corner of your mouth. Would you touch yourself if he untied you right here and now from how good he was making you feel? Your fingers skating over your clit, making your walls tighter on his cock?

There wasn't one intimate part of your body that didn't have dark, blossoming bruises of passion bitten into it. He'd had his fingers inside of you while he marked you up, feeling you soak his hand as he sucked and bite your skin.

"I fucking hope you know I am cumming inside," He growled, hovering his other hand over your throat. He didn't wrap his hand around it and squeeze. He just left it there to exert his dominance over you. Cum nearly spilled inside of you seeing how much it aroused you.

Seeing your eyes light up hearing that he planned to cum inside. The intimacy made your orgasm curl tighter. "Y-You promise?" You managed, moving your head back, and exposing your throat submissively to him for him to squeeze if he wanted.

Scaramouche couldn't hold back his moans anymore, especially not after that and so sweetly said. "Fuck, I'll pump you so fucking full. What a whore," He groaned. He would pump you so full like he imagined all those nights he jacked himself off to thoughts of you.

He knew he would never get enough of the shy, adoring blush that coated your cheeks when he degraded you.

"You are mine. All mine," His hand gripped your chin, forcing you to look at him as his cock pulsed inside of you. "Do you underneath me, slut? Or are you too fucked dumb?"

"I'm all yours, Scara. I always was," Your words were said with such tender truth to them. He couldn't detect one single hint of deception in your voice, even as your words broke apart into moans and whimpers.

You couldn't help it. You are in so love with him that it hurt. You'd just been too scared to tell him. Afraid of rejection. He could see it in your eyes. But, he understood that completely. "Shh, it's okay now, kitten," He started to babble, shuddering in pleasure as he pushed one of your knees up towards your chest, "I have you now. Everything will be okay. This horrible world won't ever hurt you," His hips snapped into yours with twice the vigor, "I'll see to that."

Only he alone could taint and corrupt you. Only he could break you down and put you back together as he saw fit. It was all the better for him that you accepted it without hesitation.

"You are close, fuck I can feel it," Your walls were squeezing so deliciously tight on his cock. He placed a rough, passionate kiss on your lips, devouring your mouth for a few long minutes. "And you are crying to," He pulled away, brushing the tears of pleasure falling from your eyes away with his thumb, "Cum on my cock like a good girl. You want me to cum inside, don't you?" He cooed.

You could barely manage a nod, crying out for him as your orgasm hit you. Your cum flooded around his cock, the feeling of your walls craving to milk his cock made cum pulse inside of you.

His fingers relentlessly rubbed your clit, further making you twitch and mewl in bliss as he fucked you through your climax.

"Good fucking girl," Scaramouche said, panting as he pulled out of you. Cum dripped out of your weeping hole. He didn't give you time to catch your breath, however. He was already working his way down between your legs to lick and suck your pussy clean.

[mbsneur]

My Love

Aitana Bonmati x Reader

Summary: your Aitanas girlfriend

Warnings: Pure Fluff, maybe bad ending

My Masterlist

please read this text before going to the story

please don't be so strict with me but rather write to me what I can do better or what you wished were different. also tell me if you find the story too long or too short.. Also write to me if you liked it. My requests are always open (and English is not my first language so don't be mad at me) and if you have any ideas for the future about who I should write please tell me… the topics I will choose by myself unless you have a request for one or two people I will Read everything.. in the next survey I will take a few ideas from the old survey and new ones…. now read and I hope you like it <33

(its a very short one)

aitana is your girlfriend, she is the most tender and sweetest person you have ever met

You know that she would drop everything if you called her and said you weren't feeling well

It was match day. You've been playing for Betis Sevilla since your childhood. It was the game against FC Barcelona. You already knew that you wouldn't have a chance

You're going to play against your girlfriend. You kept your relationship secret long enough until you went on vacation together during the summer break and decided to post a picture together so that everyone knew you were together. Since then, your team has been annoying you and keeps telling you that you are togheter with the best player

Also today they teased you about playing against Aitana, you haven't seen her in a long time, it was already overdue. You both have been very busy lately and have neglected your relationship a little, so you didn't really like the jokes your teammates made

“Can you please stop” you said slightly annoyed and pulled your jersey over your head The jokes will probably never stop

"Aww we're a little baby again today" Paula joked and pinched your cheek lightly. You clicked in annoyance and let Noelia braid your hair. It's a little ritual between you to braid each other's hair

You were all excited to play against Barça again. You finished lacing up your shoes and went into the tunnel. You acted as captains and stood right next to Alexia, the captain of Barça. You cracked your neck one last time before the referee announced it was time to line up

You stood there, gave a little applause and shook hands with your opponents. Aitana took your hand firmly in hers and gave you a little wink, which you accepted with a smile

it was kick-off. The game went well, even though you lost 5-1, you were still proud to be part of this team

//

1-0 Barcelona: Claudia Pina 26‘

2-0 Barcelona: Mariona Caldentey 44‘

2-1 Betis Sevilla: y/n 45‘

3-1 Barcelona: Caroline Graham-hansen 75‘

4-1 Barcelona: Salma Paralluelo 88‘

5-1 Barcelona: Salma Paralluelo 90+1‘

//

Even though you lost so much, you were still proud that the times were so far apart

After the game you all gave each other a handshake

Aitana ran up to you and hugged you tightly. "Hey you were great" she beamed at you with a huge smile

“Thank you aita you were pretty good too” you joked, smelling the sweet smell of her hair once again

"Would you like to come with me? I mean you're in Barcelona and I think your team will be able to do without you for the night or not?" she told you and put her arm around your shoulders to start the way to the cabins

you took a deep breath "okay but only if you cook for me" you raised your hand aitana laughed "sí I'll cook whatever you want" she said laughing and let go of you "well I'll wait for you outside my car" She said as she walked past and you nodded at her

You took a shower and told the coaching team that you would stay with Aitana and fly back alone tomorrow

//

About an hour later you were finished. You said goodbye to your team and headed towards the exit. The evening warmth of Barcelona hit your face. You looked for Aitana's car until she drove close to you

"Hola chica necesitas un conductor?"

She asks laughing and you ironically bump into her car. You walked in. It's been a long time since you looked in her car. After a moment she immediately pounced on you and bit lightly into your neck and cheek. You squealed and tried pushing her away laughing "aita aita stop" you say breathless with laughter

"I missed you so much" she tells you and places kisses on your cheek. You took her hands in yours and gave her a long kiss on the mouth

When you let go she looks at you with her sweet gaze. She licks her lips and blushes with embarrassment. You have kissed so many times but after such a long time it is always unique to kiss her again

"I missed you too" you say and smile slightly, everything is the same as before, her light ponytail, the smell of peppermint toothpaste when you kiss her and the gentle rose scent of her shower gel that is distributed in the air

"Do you want to go I'm pretty hungry" she said and rubbed her stomach lightly. She sometimes behaved like a little baby but that's what you loved about her, her funny faces that she sometimes gave you or she tickled you awake in the morning or crawled under your shirt you loved everything about her

"Yes we can go" you say, laughing slightly and giving her one last little kiss. She drove through the gate. On the car ride, you sang your favorite songs. Her hand didn't leave yours for a second

When you arrived at Aitana's house she opened your door and took your hand to escort you out. She carried your suitcase and looked for her key to the door

“You can take something from me to wear you know where everything is” she says and gave you a kiss before disappearing into the kitchen

You went into her bedroom and the smell of freshly washed laundry from her laundry basket immediately hit your nose. You did a little tidying up and taught the basket and carefully placed everything in your closet and looked for something to wear yourself You decided on a loose shirt and shorts. You changed your clothes and saw your selfie together in a frame on her dessert. A smile immediately came to your face you loved this woman.

You went into the kitchen and the smell of fresh ham hit your nose. You watched Aitana for a moment until you walked up to her and hugged her tenderly from behind. "Ay baby you're wearing my favorite shirt" she said, laughing slightly and frying a few tortillas in the pan you place your head on her shoulder and place small kisses on her neck

"can you promise me no matter how long we don't see each other or neglect each other that you'll never leave me" You say lovingly and notice how Aitana's stomach falls and rises

"I'll stay with you until you can't stand me anymore and even then I won't let you go you won't get rid of me that easily" she says with a slight smile

you beam across both cheeks "I love you Aita" you whisper in her ear

"I love you too cariño"

[troloxyn]

Self Control. (Jason Todd x Reader)

TW- Smut, drinking!!

One night at a party, you and Jason hook up, and now you're both too afraid to speak to one another. That is until he decides to help you with homework two weeks later, breaking the silence.

Listen, I haven't been able to do any school work because my mind decided it HAD to finish this first. so i hope yall enjoy! Deadass over five thousand words, I think my brain melted a little bit writing this.

Word count: 5,366

--

Having aspirations outside of vigilantism was ideal, as long as you could keep up with the pressure. Piles of overdue assignments, paperwork, case studies and unread emails clawed at her from inside of her computer. You should have something outside of your nightlife escapades- it was encouraged, expected. Keeping up with the workload was just second nature. Which right now, she could not. If she gave into the pressure of her inability to focus, she would have dropped out of her bachelors classes two semesters ago. However, the eating force of fear of failure won her over. Not only was she not one to accept failure, her entire ride to college was free- on behalf of the Wayne estate- and she definitely couldn’t disappoint him of all people. 

This one was destroying her. A case study in her criminal psychology class. If the world hadn’t moved digitally, her entire desk would be littered with notes. She avoided this project on purpose- and now that she came to face it, she realized perhaps waiting until a week before it was due was giving herself too much credit. She whisked through photos, police reports, fake-autopsies, psychologist interviews- the pages were on a never ending loop. She was tearing her hair out by the time she made it to the end of the information portion, her wrist becoming sore from endless clicking. Time to focus. Lock the fuck in, girl, she tried to tell herself. 

“How’s the six figure amount of debt going?” 

She jumped out the sound of his voice, turning in her chair to face him. Standing in the door frame, leaned against the wooden, cherry kissed wall of the library with his arms crossed. Of course, he looked incredible. She could tell he just got back from the gym, his sleeveless black shirt over his toned frame and a pair of gray sweatpants she wouldn’t let him walk out of the house in if they were a couple. His face gleamed as if he was sweating, his hair pushed back in a mess. She didn’t do a double take because she knew she’d lose some form of her composure. 

The other reason she couldn’t focus. 

“Great, considering I'm not paying for it.” She scooted closer to her computer, as if it could pull her away from his magnetizing grip on her. She could feel his eyes behind her in the grazing of an awkward, heavy silence. 

“So, what are you working on?” 

One could say the two had gotten closer within the past couple of months. Before, he practically ignored her. As they got closer, their main interactions were chastising her over being late to school. Scolding her, as if Bruce didn’t do it enough. It was never condescending- when she slept in for classes, Jason would be pounding on her door or dragging her out of bed. 

The pressure caused by him came to a halt, though, after a drunken night of intimacy. Now she was definitely waking up late for school. She’d gotten sort of used to him forcing her out of bed.  It was an accident, she thinks to herself over and over every time her body recalled his touch. That’s what was really bothering her. The two would meet eyes around others and he wouldn’t tease her the way he usually did- something lingered behind his gaze and it bothered her- the way their eyes would meet when everyone got together. The way she’d catch him looking over at her from across the room- even before that night, but more often now. Neither of them spoke about it, she didn’t think they really had the guts to. Besides him initiating a few conversations, they haven’t talked at all. It happened rather quickly between them. He had her in the bathroom on the sink, tearing off her dress and squeezing her exposed breasts, his thick and strong legs pressed between her thighs so intimately. Bites all over her neck- bites that certainly bruised her collarbone and shoulders, uncaring for her sleeveless dress as long as it came off. A party on the outside, people babbling in conversation and music blaring louder than Bruce would have liked. Dick had poured heavy drinks that night. In those moments, nothing else mattered. It was between Jason and her, the clothes he was tearing off of her and all the frustrations he’d ignored. His free hand around the back of her neck, forcing her into a sloppy, messy, kiss- her lathered moans of excitement and the friction of his jeans to her thin panties. Quieting her with his lips, drenching her entire face with kisses. rubbing her swollen clit, unzipping his jeans- slipping her panties to the side, pushing himself in. Her gasping, parted lips and wide eyes- “Shush, baby- fuck- They’re gonna hear us-“

“A case study,” she replied, snapping out of her memories into reality. She could feel his presence behind her chair, feeling a hand come onto its back rest, gently making contact with her incidentally. She cleared her throat. “It’s a research project and a case study. It’s very long. I decided to ignore it for.. a while.” 

He hummed. “Shouldn’t be too hard. We’re used to this kind of stuff anyway.” 

“It’s not that,” she replied, scooting away from his touch. “It’s uh- Just can’t focus.” 

“That’s no excuse.” She rolled her eyes at his comment. She tried not to look at him too much- His ungloved, veined hands that trailed up to his tight arms. His fingers tapped one by one on her desk. He towered over her, he was so huge- “You need help?” 

“Help? No way,” she replied. She could smell whatever cologne he was wearing and she remembered it vividly from that night. She cleared her throat awkwardly, laughing a little at his suggestion in sheer intimidation of his looming  presence. “No. I wouldn’t want to bother you with this.”

He shrugged. Finding an excuse to at least be around her since it all happened. “I ‘ont got shit else to do. Plus, might be fun. You got other homework?” 

She cried, shrinking into her arms. “Fighting with you guys and being a college student- I don’t know which is gonna kill me first.” 

He was silent for a little bit and it ate at her. She was anticipating a sly remark, a comment about needing to get her life together, pull yourself up by the bootstraps, not an invasive silence- 

“You should be proud. It’s not easy.” 

His comment almost left her crippled. 

“Huh?” She looked back at him, giving him a look. He immediately froze up, frowning at her, flustered by her reaction. “Dammit- I try to be nice for once- I’m saying you’re doing a good job. I certainly couldn’t give a fuck enough to do what you do.” She smiled a bit and turned back to her screen. 

“That’s probably the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.” He smacked his lips and leaned in closer to read the text on her screen, shaking his head. “Don’t be weird. I won’t do it again.” 

Except, that wasn’t the nicest thing he’d said to her. Maybe while sober, but that night in the bathroom through the suffocated echoes of laughter and music, he practically fawned over her. Spilling words of affection, calling her a goddess, treating every part of her body with an intense passion she didn’t expect he held for her. She’d never expected him to be like this, thrusting himself into her and gripping her ass tightly, mouth pressed against one another and still looking for oxygen through painted moans. Kissing every area of exposed skin he could breathe near, worshiping her body like it was a drying resource. “God, you’re so fucking hot,” he moaned, pulling back while fucking her into the sink to get a look at her taking him. His thumb brushed her clit with enough force to form a knot in her stomach.  “J-jason-” He cut her off moans with more kisses, never stopping his rhythm.  “Better be quiet, baby,” he said through her lips. “You want this whole house to know what I’m doing to you?” Her moans were muffled by her whining, biting her lips closed as he looked into her eyes. “You want everyone to know how good I’m fucking you?” She nodded her head yes, barely able to manage the words out of her desperate mouth and he chuckled. “Oh yeah?” His voice made the knot in her stomach tighten like a balled fist. He could see it in her face and feel it inside of her, each word he spoke and every thrust she was being knocked over the edge. “Keep up them pretty moans then, baby, everyone’s gonna know who’s making you feel this good-” Her moans peaked and through his drunken state he wondered if anyone really heard them in here. He couldn’t care less, being knuckle deep into the girl he’d had dreams about for months and constantly stealing looks when he thought she didn’t notice. “You gonna cum for me, baby? That’s it, keep going, I won’t stop until you do.”

She wondered how he could act so cordial now. 

She didn’t forget any moment of that night. How they took shots together from a nearly failed mission, how they argued over comics, how they fought or threw their jackets at each other. How during their fake fight, he picked her up by her legs, slamming her into the couch. How easily he moved her around, how huge he was in comparison. How his arms felt on her body. How she swore she could totally beat his ass and how they had to fight- she just wanted him to put his hands on her for some reason, badly. How he had opened up to her in such a way she hadn’t seen before. How she noticed that night how incredibly handsome his smile was, or how his eyes gleamed in an almost squint when he laughed. How Dick had teased him for fighting with her. How when the party got louder and they kept talking and stumbling into each other, giggling and pushing each other into walls. Or how she’d pulled him into the bathroom and almost immediately were kissing, pressing into each other’s bodies like they’d been together for years. How the next day they couldn’t even look at each other. 

“Why don’t you start by organizing your sources? I can help with the interviews,” he said, snapping her out of her day dream. “You’re really gonna help me?” “Don’t think you could do it without me,” he smiled, something she didn’t catch him doing often. 

After a solid thirty minutes of reading, she realized she was going in circles. Each part of the overlapping case study was drowned out by the wretched banter of her memories. It felt impossible to not steal glances at him. Ever so often she would feel eyes on her and she would let him stare- moments at a time felt like minutes, they traded glances awkwardly.  She watched him as he intensely scrolled on the spare laptop, taking physical notes in one of her journals. His fist propping up his head as he wrote, eyebrows knitted in concentration. Recently, she started to notice how handsome he was. How the intensity of his personality took over his dark features in contrast to that pretty smile he gave when he was drinking the other night. He looked up at her, catching her stare red handed and she smiled. “How’s it coming?” She asked. She felt flustered and nervous, unable to diminish the little smiles that came to her face as she took glances at him. He closed the notebook and stretched his hands into the air, lifting his black shirt to reveal some of his stomach. “I should be asking you that,” he said in a yawn. “What’s the matter? Still can’t focus?” He asked. She shook her head no. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she muttered with an awkward laugh, turning back to her computer. She knew exactly what was wrong with her- and so did he. 

“Lemme’ see,” He said, sliding past her to her computer. Now they were dangerously close- his arm going underneath hers to reach her keyboard, their hands brushing against one another so he could move the mouse. They stayed like this for a few minutes, slowly getting closer to one another, his broad shoulders near her face. Gently, she placed her temple against his shoulder, scooting closer to him. She noticed him stop typing, the silence in the room drowned out by her laptop’s fans thudding every now and then. Snapping his concentration once more and putting him more on edge than he thought she could, “Do you wanna sit?” She asked. “We can sit together,” she was being bold.

 For ignoring his existence for almost two weeks, she had an awful lot of forced confidence. That whiplash scarred him, made his stomach turn, assuming he heard her incorrectly. He thought maybe he came off too strong that night, in the bathroom- perhaps it was the way he talked to her while he fucked her. Maybe it threw her off, perhaps he said too much. He was a passionate man and she had gotten a hold of him at the height of his yearning. She wanted to be close to him again- even if not in the same way, to be engulfed by his arms might be enough to help her focus. He agreed with great hesitation, feeling flustered and unlike himself. It wasn’t often when he felt put on edge, and everything about her was making something in him tick. Her soft touches, whatever perfume or shampoo she used, her quiet hums while she tried to work. He almost resented her for making him feel so self conscious. 

Watching her sit down into his lap, biting down on his tongue. For two weeks, ever since that night, he’d been trying to suppress the feelings that got worse with time. Confusion, anxiety, yearning for her all over again. He had a whiplash that he couldn’t lick to heal like other wounds. Approaching her was incredibly difficult, especially since she’d disappear whenever he came around. Months of dreaming about her in those positions were taken to reality and he savored every moment of licking up her body and taking her over and over again- but when he had felt that coldness from her, he wished he hadn’t even been there that night. He would have rather suffered in silence longer than for her to not talk to him. The night of the party was an accident, sure, but not a bad one- just not one he would’ve expected. Not one he knew how to confront properly. How could he be around her and act like nothing happened that night, when he had to cover her mouth to not let veracious moans leak out of the bathroom? Neither of them expected it to get to that point. He didn’t know where it came from. He had a certain amount of self control, self control that was tested- self control that failed with every racking thrust he slammed into her. He thought about it almost every minute of every day, slamming inside of her and grabbing her hair, the way she moaned and sighed in appreciation- the way his name rolled off her tongue like an orgasm building up in his body-

He had to stop thinking about it. He could feel an erection press his sweats and he huffed, moving her away from his crotch with ease. What was he doing here anyway? He wanted to talk to her- he’s wanted to since it happened- but it was too much to confront. Everytime he even got near her he could sense her discomfort. Dick asked him about her several times after that night. “Everybody knew you guys were flirting. You were body slamming her into the couch and twirling her around, and then you guys disappeared for an hour-” He was nervous, maybe even scared of her emotions, not knowing if she resented him for that night. But the way she was leaning back for comfortability against his chest, and the way she held onto his free arm so innocently, he sincerely doubted it now. With an arm wrapped around her waist, she moved back to the center of his lap. 

Maybe they would just never bring it up, he thought. Maybe they’ll just keep moving forward and with disdain or limerence for one another. He didn’t wanna do this every couple of weeks without talking to her in between, or having to pretend a part of him wasn’t deeply infatuated by her. He felt her shift and he could’ve let out a whimper- he had a feeling she knew what he was doing and it was torturing him. A hand fell to her thigh. He traced it a bit, as if it were casual- he was beginning to get light headed. She wore a skirt and thigh highs, so he played with the elasticity of her socks, snapping them onto her skin gently. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, his heart pounding like it was his first time. From over her shoulder, He looked at her thighs. He remembered that night, spreading them apart and pounding her. He buried his face into her neck, his member twitching from the memory, her smell, her ass pressing and shifting on him. He knew she could feel it and now he wanted to ask her all of those questions he had asked that same night while he had her on the sink.

 His hands slid down her thigh, squeezing them firmly, lightly parting them over his knees. She hummed. It was rather meak and it made him nervous with excitement. “Hmm?” He asked. “You’re distracting me,” she told him. Not like she didn’t enjoy it. 

“Excuses,” he mumbled into her neck. “What you need to do is focus.” He said, traveling further up her body. Bold, very bold. She could feel tightness in her stomach and her face flush with heat. “I’m trying,” she stuttered out as he explored more coverage of her thigh. His fingers traced her flesh, drawing closer and closer to her skirt. “Good,” he huffed. “Keep going.” His voice was more gentle than it usually was, slower and muffled into her shoulder. He watched as she organized her work, skipping through her case file and summarizing the prompt questions. His hands met her panties and her entire body tensed, he watched as she began to mistype on her keyboard and fumble with commands. Through the cloth of her panties, he felt damp fabric as he slid down her slit, coming back up and making full circles around her clit with his other hand squeezing her thigh. He held her thighs open with his own, fully spread out, only covered by the cloth of her skirt. She whined, hummed, mumbled his name, shifted against his stiff erection. “Why’d you stop typing?” He asked, his fingers in locomotion. She whined through closed lips, thighs twitching and tensing against his own. “Jason- It feels good-” “You’re gonna get in trouble if you don’t finish that work, girl.” He taunted her, quick but heavy moans escaping her lips. “Keep goin’,” he demanded. She did as she was told, trying to write sentences through a building orgasm. He could feel it from the way her thighs tensed and how her back arched that she was close. He wanted to give it to her so badly it made him ache, make her cum over and over again- he didn’t know if it was right, if they could be friends after this. He didn’t know if he could watch her act like he didn’t do these things to her after it was over. Was this worth whatever relationship they had left? Even as he contemplated it, his hands couldn’t stop roaming. He couldn’t fake it- he couldn’t act like he didn’t want her and he wouldn’t, either. He watched as she struggled to type and flip through files on her computer. “Good job, baby. You’re being sucha’ good girl.” He kissed her ears as she let out a soft moan, slipping his free hand up her loose fitted shirt, going under her bra. “Jason- I’m-” “Keep saying it, say my name again,” the friction of their clothes were making him raw with desperation, bucking his hips up as she melted onto him. He felt her tense up, longer than before, letting out a sigh of his name, gripping the sides of the chair and the mouse. He continued to touch the fabric covering her swollen clit, letting her ride out her orgasm as he kissed her face. The way she moaned and moved around in his lap could make anyone fall in love, he thought. That was dangerous. She was pressed completely into his back, humming his name, touching his face with her soft hands. He brought his fingers back to that sweet spot, making her finish even faster the second time. He could feel the dampness on her thighs, sweating onto his pants and he hadn’t even fingered her. 

He stood up, holding her by her waist as he did so, bending her back over the keyboard. “Keep working, baby. Don’t mind me, okay?” He kissed the sides of her face while he was pressed against her back. She heard his sweatpants shift as she worked his boxers. She tried to look back but he grabbed her face, pushing it down into the screen. “Work,” he ordered, more intensely this time. With her bent over her keyboard, her lifted skirt exposed her thin panties, working them halfway down her thighs. He removed his member from his boxers, precum staining his clothes and dripping from the tip. “What are you working on now, baby?” He asked. His voice made knots in her stomach as she tried to flip through pages and explain what she was doing. Her mouth parted to speak but was interrupted as his erection poked through her thighs, rubbing against her leaking mess. He had a strong grip on her ass, moving her hips back and forth on his cock, watching the gleam from her soaked cunt make noises. He moved slowly and with ease, her thighs were soaked from his teasing. “T- I’m- I’m working- Trying to-” He gave her ass a firm slap. “Speak up,” he groaned. His cock ached with every sliding motion, he could probably cum himself but he held back, satiating every movement. “The introduction- to my- my um..,” she panted. He laughed as she scrambled through her moans. “Please, Jason?” He hummed in appreciation. He kept working his dick back and forth against her slit, pushing himself faster each time from pure bliss. Now he was a moaning mess, low groans he tried to silence as he fucked her thighs. “Keep working,” he huffed. “You still have so much to do. You’ve been waking up late every day for classes, and you expect me to let you get away with that?” He watched as she cried, trying to type and retain information. Her brain, too distracted by his aching cock pleasing himself between her. She wanted to protest, to blame him for not waking her up like she’d gotten used to. So spoiled of her. Firmly she squeezed her thighs, earning a moan from his parted lips, stroking her hair with his free hand and tightly gripping it. With a quick gasp, he pulled her face back, kissing her gently. “I missed you,” he mumbled into her mouth. She almost didn’t hear him but she spoke through his moaning kisses when it registered. “I missed you so much, Jason,” he was now squeezing her breasts and rocking against her hips, steady moans he didn’t care to suppress anymore. “I thought about you everyday,” he admitted. “I thought about you in every single way.” He moaned, bending to kiss the back of her shoulders, trailing down her neck to the sensitivity of her spine. His words earned a yearning cry from her, and the part that wasn’t enjoying every engulfing moan of hers felt a slight dread about their future. As he kissed her shoulders, he wondered if she would come back to him after this. If they would be able to be normal like how it was before. Her back arched from the sweetness of his lips as he ran his hands underneath her clothes. Great, he thought. Go ahead and say a bunch of sweet shit to the girl you won’t talk to for the next month.

Pulling out his soaked member from her thighs, with ease, he pushed himself into her. Honest, drawn moans escaped their lips, saliva trailing from their lips as they departed. He grabbed her hips, forcing her down into the keyboard once more, taking in every part of her soaked cunt and moaning her name. She shifted, struggled against his hips, his length believably long for a man of his stature- something she was not used to. “C’mon, baby. Take it for me, like before,” He cooed, keeping his hand firm on her back as he fucked her, louder, sloppier moans of pain and pleasure from him poking parts of her that had only been reached by him. He was so different when they had sex, she had realized. So sweet and affectionate, intensely passionate and loving. Meekly she reached her hand to his hip, stopping his motion momentarily- he chuckled, grabbing ahold of the hand and holding it to her back. “What’s wrong? Can’t take it?” He asked through thrusts that made her unable to form words.  “Jason- feels so good, it’s so much,” she stuttered out, rocking her hips slowly. He grabbed her other arm, holding her back like a pair of handcuffs as his breathing hitched.

 “Oh yeah?” He asked. “You want me to keep going?” He said, slowing his thrusts. Her hips rocked promptly against his throbbing member, “please, please don’t stop,” she mumbled, her face now down into the coldness of the Wayne manor’s library desk. “No problem, sweetheart,” he spoke with confidence, picking up his speed, giving her no time to adjust. Fucking her almost senselessly, her moans now cries as his mercy ran thin. He couldn’t help it, he couldn’t slow down, mindlessly knocking over her book bag and other school supplies as he broke into her. His pace was rapid and without any consideration of how she was going to sit down for the next few days. Slamming a hand down onto the table for added pressure while still restraining her, “-Tell me how much you enjoy this,” he panted, watching her struggle against him as her ass bounced against him every time he plunged into her. Her words were melted ice cream, scrambled word vomit, he fucked her so hard she could barely manage to spit anything but the word Jason out, which she mumbled with each thrust- and it drove him over the edge. “Tell me how much you missed this feeling, tell me how much you missed me,” he spat, grabbing her hair and forcing her face up. He looked at her with sincere need- not just a sexual one. “I missed you, I missed you, I missed you Jason,” she confessed through stutters. It made him smile, a sweet, almost drunken smile as he laughed through huffs of pleasure. “So good for me,” he said through kisses. Her stomach fluttered from a softness she’d only seen once before in him. 

He picked up her leg, throwing it on the table to make sure he fucked her thoroughly enough to get his point across. With her arms now free, she grabbed onto the table for dear life, biting her tongue from letting out a scream she knew someone would hear from above the floorboards. They didn’t need Alfred coming in to check on if someone was getting murdered down here. Holding one leg up as he pounded into her, his breathing racking from every thrust that brought him closer to satisfaction, he grabbed a fistfull of her hair. “You’re gonna talk to me tomorrow, right?” The question threw her off guard, her moaning dimming as she tried to piece the words together. The grip on her hair tightened and she winced. “You’re not gonna ignore me after I fucked you this good?” He asked, getting closer to her ear, making sure he heard her right. “Because,” he panted as his hips bucked further into her, the grip on her elevated leg almost bruising. “I’m gonna fuck you like this every chance that I get.” The words edged her, he felt her body tensing, aching for release as he picked up his pace. “You don’t have a choice- me ‘nd you- we’re gonna do this a lot more.” He felt her cumming, squeezing around him, her back arching as he muttered filth into her ear, indescribable moans and thank you’s. “Don’t thank me yet,” he told her. “You’re not getting rid of me, girl. Try to ignore me again. You won’t forget how much I made you cum. You won’t forget how good I fucked you.” Her face felt hot and so did her entire body, more of a promise than a threat and she was fine with that. “I won’t forget,” she repeated as he kissed the lobe of her ear.  His chest now pressed against her back with a hand around her throat, “You’re mine. You’re all mine. You’re not going anywhere. I’ll see you tomorrow, and the day after that- everyday,” She felt herself cumming again as he beat into every corner of her walls, nodding profusely. “I’m all yours, Jay,” she whimpered. “Thank you- thank you-” She forced, her entire body squirming under pleasure. 

“Fuck,” he muttered. “Where do you want me to cum?” He asked. “Inside of me, please,” desperate and filled with need. “You want me to fill you up, princess?” She nodded, begging. “Look at me,” he demanded, forcing her face to his, eyes interlocking. “-Need to see that pretty face when I cum-” It was less of a demand and more of his own whimpering pleading. His hips bucked one last time into her, her mouth open for a kiss as she watched him finish, a range of emotion hitting his face as he tightened the grip on her leg, stroking her face with his free palm. It was incredibly hot, she thought, watching his face while he came.

 He pulled out with a sharp gasp. He bent over, kissing her exposed ass before pulling up her panties and fixing her skirt, fixing his own clothes afterwards. He grabbed a hold of her, sitting back down into the chair, stroking her hair and giving her small pecks on her face. With a sigh of content, he kissed her temple. “Alright, baby. Can you focus now for me?”

Meanwhile, upstairs. 

“Alfred,” Dick interrupted as Alfred tried for the door. “Why don’t you ever hangout with me anymore?” Alfred raised his eyebrow at the young man he practically raised in front of him. “Master Dick, whatever do you mean? Is our spare time spent with one another inefficient?” “Yes, right now it is,” Dick said with crossed arms. “We could be hanging out, right now.” “Sounds lovely. I just need to check the library-” “So, you don’t like me anymore?” Dick huffed, covering his face. “Can’t we go make cookies? Please?” Alfred sighed. “Master Dick, is there something wrong?’ “Yes, Alfred, there actually is.” Alfred raised his brow once again. “But if you bake with me right now, there won’t be. And I will be much happier.” “Is there something going on downstairs you don’t want me to know about?” Alfred asked with a concerned look. Maybe he didn’t want to know. “I think we should make sugar cookies this time,” Dick said with a grin, placing his hand on Alfred’s shoulder and leading him away from a now closed door.

[strongheartneteyam]

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!human!reader/female!dreamwalker!reader

Neteyam is aged up.

Chapter 2

CW: angst, reader hates her life, neteyam is like her "secret admirer" but he eventually becomes obsessed, so, it gives off some creepy vibes, possessive neteyam, forbidden love, neteyam is REALLY protective over her, neteyam isn't really fond of humans (hates them) and only makes an exception for reader, TRIGGER WARNING for a few depression symptoms (such as reader holding back tears and looking miserable really often), stalking, obsessive behavior & possessiveness

Synopsis: Reader is unhappy with her human life. She works for the lab as a cook. She's a Dreamwalker and she spends every free day she gets walking through Pandora's forests. In one of those days, Neteyam sees her but she doesn't notice him. He falls in love, seeing how happy she is amidst nature. Neteyam finds out she's actually a human in an Avatar, so, he finds a way to go where her real body is. He hates to admit it but, seeing her in her human body, he realizes he still loves her. After watching her, he notices how she's always happier when she's in her Avatar, so, he develops a deeper connection to her. However, he becomes obsessive. Reader has only heard about him, the famous son of Jake Sully and future Olo'eyktan, praised for his great achievements as a young Omatikaya. After getting reader's attention, Neteyam asks her to choose to live forever in her Avatar, becoming his mate and making tsaheylu with him, gaining a new home as a fresh member of his tribe. Reader is scared and torn, since, even though she's intensely attracted to him and only truly enjoys life when she's Dreamwalking, she doesn't really know him and she's afraid of dying when trying to go past Eywa's eye. But Neteyam just won't give up on her that easily.

♡ This is Reader's Avatar

☆ This is the official playlist for this story, the songs I listen to while working on it.

•

Finally, this fanfic is out!! lots of people seemed to love the tiny sneak peek I posted so... I hope you guys will love the fanfic itself too hehe I'm so relieved I could finally post it ooof My environment is the worst EVER rn & i haven't had any motivation or focus to write lately BUT i seem to be getting out of that damned writer's block I was in (ITS THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD UGH HATE IT TO DEATH)

Not proofread. My life is a hurricane, so, we don't work with proofread stories here. Hope you find it in your hearts to forgive me, my angels :')

na'vi words:

yawne - beloved

tsaheylu - the neurological bond the na'vi make with their mate, through their tendrils, at the end of their long braid.

Chapter 1

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

I love your touch, cold as ice

And I love every single tear you cry

I just love the way you're losing your life

Oh, my baby, how beautiful you are

Oh, my darling, completely torn apart

Gone With The Sin (HIM)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

Neteyam would look at you every moment he could. He didn't have that much free time since he was the Olo'eyktan's son and had so many responsibilities weighting on his shoulders. But he would always make any sacrifice he needed to make to find time to see you. Even if it meant using the few hours he had to himself to contemplate you. His sad, gloomy-eyed, beautiful girl. You were not actually his yet, but, he was determined to make that change.

Neteyam saw you holding back tears way too damn often, so, he was always deeply worried about you, and, that was one of the reasons why he was always creeping around, high up in branches of trees located in Hell's Gate, watching over you, almost every day, ready to help you, defend you from any danger, to say "screw it" to how out of the blue it would be if he - a stranger, a male na'vi stranger - just came up to you and said "hey, I've been watching you for a while, and… I'm so, so in love with you. Please, leave this damn idiotic human life you live and let Eywa help you be transferred to your Avatar body for good, just like she helped my father. You're so insanely pretty like this - and I have never felt attracted to any female of your demon kind before, so, believe me when I talk about your beauty - but you look even prettier when you're in your Avatar form. Let me make you my mate, let me make you the future Olo'eyktan's mate. I can give you a far better life than the one you have now"

He knew he was just a weird alien boy (as the humans would probably say), stalking you, always up in the highest tree branches he could find and reach, watching a girl while she cooks - as it was your job - like a hunter watching their prey. But he meant no harm. On the contrary, he meant to take care of you, to save you from it all. Because he wasn't blind. Neteyam saw how unhappy you looked while peeling potatoes (he knew what they were because his dad who was once human told him and his siblings about how delicious that vegetable from Earth tasted, especially when it was made as French fries) to cook on the high-tech stove the humans used to prepare their meals in and prepare mashed potatoes to those damn lab guys who invaded his Planet and did nothing but harm.

Neteyam thought it to be unnecessary. His future mate could easily prepare the same potatoes in a bonfire he would light up for you in the Omatikaya forest. He knew they would taste even better roasted in the natural fire than just plainly cooked in that energy fueled cooking device the humans used. He could give you a life so incredibly better than the one you had right now, it pained him to see his yawne working so hard to feed every damn scientist in that cold, air-conditioned lab while not being as appreciated and thanked by them as you deserved to be. You could be preparing food to feed his children instead, the sons and daughters he would give you, if only you accepted becoming his forever mate.

He hated the humans. They didn't know how to lead a proper life. But you were different.

Neteyam knew how breathtaking you looked in a na'vi like body because the first time he saw you, you were in your Avatar body - as you were a Dreamwalker - and that's when he fell in love with you. But he learned to love your human body too. He could never hate you, even in your human form. You were the only human he did not despise.

The day Neteyam first saw you, he was out in the forest to hunt and gather food, collecting bladder polyps, lionberry seeds and trying to kill a hexapede, so, he could bring all of it home and him and his family could eat a nutritious dinner.

That's when he heard a squeaky, funny laugh. It was a female voice, he recognized. Neteyam followed that sound just like he was a sailor and the girl whose laugh he heard was a mermaid, bewitching his senses and drawing him closer.

When he saw you, it was like his heart was going to explode in a thousand pieces, so fast it was beating inside his rigid ribcage, so strongly the blood was being pumped through his arteries. He knew he had to make you his mate, to have you forever.

Neteyam had always been a practical and rational young man, he had to be. He was the eldest son and had to look after his 3 younger siblings and not show a single sign of weakness when his father would scold him in a harsh tone, whenever any of his siblings - specially his younger brother, Lo'ak -, got into trouble and somehow, Neteyam ended up having to take responsibility over their actions. "But that girl… that beautiful, ethereal girl… she makes me believe in things I've never even considered before. I know it sounds stupid to say that about a girl I just met, only some minutes ago but I don't care", he thought. Only he and Eywa herself knew the raw, powerful feeling he was experiencing at that moment. He just wanted to let go for a while. To not force himself to be all brains, zero heart for once, just once. And you were gifting him the opportunity to do just that. Your beauty was so enchanting, it could leave any creature in awe.

His father had once told him about Christianity, one of the most popular religions back on the glory days of the Planet Earth, and, of course he didn't follow those beliefs, his spirituality was completely based on Eywa, the Great Mother, the spirit and moving energy of Pandora, but, if the beings called "angels" his father talked about were real, Neteyam was utterly sure that they could only look like you.

You were perfect. Every curve of your body, every bioluminescent freckle, every pattern of your stripes, your long dark braided hair falling like water on your flawless back, as you kept smiling and touching every single flower you could see, playing in a foolish way, just like a child. He felt a primal urge coming from his guts to make tsaheylu with you right there, right at that moment.

So many thoughts roamed through Neteyam's mind: "I need her… right here, right now. She's… ugh… I've never felt anything like this before… What's going on with your stupid mind, Neteyam?! You can't just choose any girl to be your mate, you'll be the next Olo'eyktan, remember?! The best choice would be a girl who has a calling to be Tsahìk. Maybe your parents will try to arrange a marriage, to find the perfect match for you. Damn! Who am I trying to fool? She is the only perfect match for me…"

Neteyam started to watch you go about the forest every chance he got.

When he found out you were actually a Dreamwalker, a human in a body created in a laboratory, a hybrid of demon and na'vi, a freak... It was like his world was falling apart, piece by tiny piece crashing on the floor. How did he not notice your fifth finger before?! Was he that much under your spell, that blinded by how beautiful and charming you were?, he asked himself.

So, he told himself he was going to find a way to at least see what your true form looked like. He hissed at the thoughts and feelings you had caused him the whole way to Hell's Gate, where the laboratory was and where he knew all the humans that stayed in Pandora and had an Avatar stayed.

When Neteyam saw you in your human body, he got hit by something as strong as lightning. The moment he sniffed your sweet scent (the smell you had in your Avatar had notes of your original human scent, as your DNA was used to build that body), the moment he recognized that melodious voice… The expression in those eyes, that smile, that laughter… it was you. His yawne.

He didn't understand how that was possible, what he was feeling. Nevertheless, he realized he still loved you. His heart still beat fast for you. It didn't matter which physical form you took. Na'vi or human. You were you. And he loved you. Madly.

His people had a great contempt towards the ones who Dreamwalked. They were "demons in false bodies", like his grandma and his mother always said. And Neteyam himself felt the same. Worse, he had felt disgusted by the love and desire you made him feel, back when he watched you wandering around the Omatikaya lands, when you would jump like a little kid, so happy playing with the bioluminescent, neon plants of the forest.

But, still, that feeling lingered inside him. The attachment, the deep affection, the devotion… He could not comprehend it.

All Neteyam could grasp was that he hated all humans, but you were the only exception.

Even though you were originally human, you had a na'vi heart. He just knew that. As crazy and impossible as it sounded, he figured out it was true. And that blew his mind. That sorrowful girl he was seeing cooking in a small technological kitchen was not the same one he had seen at the forest. But it was, at the same time. It apparently made no sense, but it actually did. You were not where you belonged. You did not belong imprisoned among those four walls that the other humans kept you in. That you were keeping yourself in. You belonged free amidst the Pandoran trees. You did not belong in those big human clothes. You belonged in a comfortable loincloth and a big leaf necklace covering your beautiful breasts, letting the wind hit your skin.

You seemed out of place in that environment you were currently in. And that made Neteyam feel something so overpowering. He knew it was useless to try and fight it. He was not even sure if he even wanted to fight it anymore. That feeling was good. It felt just like what he felt when he thought you were a na'vi girl. He even felt attracted to you, even though he still thought you looked much prettier in your Avatar body.

He was fully aware you were one of the demons. But you were not like the rest of them. You were special. He could tell that. He could tell you'd be a hundred per cent happier if he could convince you to become na'vi. And that's exactly what he was planning to do. He still did not know how, but he would find a way.

༊⁀➷

Taglist:

@crazy4books1

@samistars

@lik0

@miri-belle

@nerdybouquetofkittens-blog

@xxunnie

@your-girl-mj

@sereisstuff

@darktyrantwinner

@henhouse-horrors

@explosiongamora

@yeosxxx

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

i've been having a couple of downer days recently, and i kept looking for a verse i haven't read thrice yet for some comfort, but you're age! gap verse has been a pleasant escape even though its not what i was looking for. you're writing never fails to make me feel better ari 💕💕

Here's how they met 💜

Bruce sighed. He was starting to hate talk show appearances, but at least this one had never been too bad. Angelique was chatty and fun but not grating. Her show ran as school let out. So grannies watched after their naps and kids watched getting off the bus. She ran a little something for everyone.

He assumed he was here for the grannies.

"I'm so sorry I'm late the shoot ran over and I couldn't get away."

The voice caught his attention. Not the fake starlet over dramatic gushing, but genuine distress. And he half turned to look. You looked like you came from a shoot. Straight off the pages of a glossy magazine.

"No worries, Miss Y/L/N we got your call in enough time. We'll just touch up your face and you'll be good to go," the manager greeting you, said.

Bruce smiled a little. Clearly, you were a frequent guest. You thanked him profusely and trotted off. Not needing to be told where to go. And as you go, there's several crew members you can greet by name. You've either been here a lot or worked with them before. Or both. But, it's endearing.

He turned back around listening to Angelique get her updates on where production was. "-And Y/N is in hair and makeup as we speak."

"Oh, bless her heart," Angelique said. "That's what I get calling her last minute." She turned to Bruce and held out her hand, "Are you ready?" she asked.

"As I'll ever be," he chuckled taking her hand, "You know these sorts of things aren't my forte. My oldest on the other hand-"

"Don't you worry about a thing," Angelique reassured him, patting the hand she was holding before letting it go. "Y/N is an old pro- Ah! speak of the devil!" She swooped over and kissed you on either cheek. "You look absolutely divine, is that one of yours?"

"You know it is," you tell her laughing, returning the gesture. "As if I could walk in and NOT wear my own design, you'd never let me live it down."

"So true. Darling," she said grabbing your hand and pulling you over to Bruce, "I want you to meet Bruce. You'll be on stage together today. You know it's charity week and I though it would be great to highlight all the work you do for school arts programs along side the Wayne foundation," she said.

"Hello," you tell him, holding out your hand.

"Pleased to meet you," he said, taking the hand you offered warmly. Giving you his most charming smile. You did look good. And he could tell they hadn't done much to your face or your hair. "I'm a big fan of your work," he commented.

Your smile didn't falter but your eyes narrowed slightly. And Bruce cringed internally Shit. She thinks I mean the Playboy spread, he thought. "Your last movie, the drama, especially. The range of emotion and the depth- It really was incredible."

"Thank you," you tell him. "It was challenging but I really enjoyed it."

Bruce felt his face heat when Angelique coughed and he remembered hearing that you had the ability to make someone feel like they were the only person in the room. He'd forgotten for just a second. In just that brief moment that he was waiting for an appearance. "It showed I uh- my kids made fun of me when I cried at the end-"

"Aww, Angelique gushed, "This is amazing. you guys keep up this chemistry. It'll go totally viral." She bounced on the balls of her feet and kissed your cheek again, "I'll have someone bring you a coffee, sweetie. You're going to start wilting soon."

And before you could say anything or Bruce could offer to go and get it for you himself, Angelique had bustled off to find and assistant to give marching orders to.

[judgementdayslittle]

Little reader's reaction to Mami and Papi ignoring her in favour of little Dom. Plus Mami and Papi realize that they've been neglecting little reader.

Oooh now, I love writing fluff, but this...This is my jam and butter. I am a SUCKER for hurt/comfort. So I will gladly write this one!

-Now Mami and Papi wuold never ignore you on purpose, and they're usually very good at giving you and Dom equal amounts of attention and care.

-But one day, Dom was not only sick, but in a VERY little headspace. A sick toddler was one thing, but a sick infant? That meant all hands on deck.

-Now they didn't neglect your basic needs. In the morning, Mami would sit you at the table with some toast and juice before quickly going to attent to Dom. Usually at least one of your caregivers would sit at the table with you and talk about what you wanted to do today.

-But instead, you quietly ate your breakfast. Hoping things would get better through out the day.

-Sadly things didn't get much better though. You were left to play all by yourself, which was so boring!

-When you tried to go to Dom's room to get them, they would quickly hurry you out of there. Their excuse being "We don't want you to get sick too honey."

-When you saw them outside of his room, you would try to get their attention then as well. When Papi was going to make a bottle for Dom, you tugged on his shirt.

-His reply being "Sorry cariño, can't play right now. I need to get Dom his bottle." He said, right before you can hear Dom's cries from upstairs.

-You were starting to lose hope, but then you had an idea! They would always praise you when you drew something for them, and they would always hang it on the fridge. Sometimes afterwards, they would all color with you!

-So you got to work. Trying to make the bestest picture ever with your crayons!

-Once you were all done, you hurriedly went upstairs to show them. Though you knew they would just shoo you away if you went into Dom's room. So you sat right outside, waiting for them.

-A half an hour later, Mami came out! You showed her your picture, expecting praise and cuddles and kisses!

-But instead you got a tired "That's great sweetheart. Excuse me, I have to get DomDom more medicine." She said before she rushed past you.

-At that point, you felt so sad and confused. Why were Mami and Papi ignoring you? Both you and Dom have been sick before, and they weren't like this back then!

-You were starting to think you did something bad. And now Mami and Papi were mad at you...

-So you sadly made your way to the time out corner. Sitting their with tears slowly falling down your face.

-A while later, Dom finally fell asleep. Giving Rhea and Damian some time to themselves. They decided to go downstairs to make a late lunch.

-They looked around for you to see what you wanted to eat, but they weren't expecting to find you sitting in the corner.

-Worried, Rhea spoke up first. "What are you doing over there sweetheart?" Rhea asked, grabbing you gently to turn you around. Once you faced her, she saw your tears and red puffy eyes.

-"Oh honey, what's wrong? Did something happen?" She asked in a soft, worried tone. Damian coming up to the two of you to help with the situation.

-"Mami Papi no love me no more..." You cry, making your caregivers hearts break.

-"That's not true baby! We love you so much! Why would you-"

-Then it hit them like a ton of bricks. How they haven't been paying much attention to you for the past few days. How they left you feeling all alone. And no matter how much you tried to reach out to them, they always brushed you off.

-They felt so incredibly bad about ignoring you. Rhea scoops you up in her arms and rocks you. Papi hugs you from the other side.

-"We are so sorry cariño." Papi said, "We were so worried about Dom, we didn't notice that you were hurting as well..."

-Mami continued, "We love you so much sweetheart, and we'll never stop loving you. Mami and Papi messed up big time. Can you forgive us?"

-Of course you do forgive them, you love them after all! You give them a biiiiiiiiig hug back!

-While Dom is sleeping, the three of you spend time together. Eating lunch at the table, playing with toys, and watching cartoons.

-When Dom does eventually get up, you feel scared that they might leave you alone again.

-But instead, Papi gets up and ruffles your hair. "I'm gonna go take care of Dom for a bit. But Mami's gonna stay right here with you so you're not lonely. Alright?" He said.

-You grin, happy that someone was going to stay here and keep you company.

-Mami ruffles your hair as well, "I think it's high time we have some Mami-Baby time today. And later on, you can have Papi-Baby time while I take care of Dom."

-You were happy with that arrangement. Papi gave you a kiss on the head before heading up to take care of Dom.

-After all that happened, you had never felt so loved!

[sen-ya]

Life After Info Post

[Click here to access the Life After Digital Comic Book]

Summary: Two years ago, a viral outbreak rose the dead. Considering how his life had gone up to this point, surgeon Trafalgar Law figured this might as well happen too. When a supply run into the nearby city gets intercepted by a seemingly reckless and impulsive former patient, the dependable routine Law had settled into in this new life shatters. He finds himself exposed — his body out in the infected landscape, his conscious clawing to define what he believes is right, his heart begrudgingly deciding to find a new home on his sleeve. Maybe there’s more than a virus roaming the new world that can bring a dead man back to life.

Content Warnings: Canon typical violence, zombies/body horror (but lbr I am not good at making scary things look scary)

Relationships: Luffy x Law

Update Schedule: New page every Monday/Wednesday/Friday

Page Count: [37 posted | 55 drawn]

Latest Update: [7/21/24] WOWEE did I get myself carried away this morning. I just spent 5 hours organizing my comics and creating the digital comic book pages. I could have spent that time drawing or idk not doing what I do for my job, but I cannot be stopped. Anyway I blocked out 30 pages of this comic last week and they include the most intense action sequence I've ever done in my gotdang life. Wish me luck because I am nervous about tying down all my drawings lmao.

OLD UPDATES:

[6/29/24] HULLO! I'm doing so bad at keeping my masterposts updated lately I am sorry. All pages of life after are tagged life after if you're ever looking between masterpost updates! Also exciting update, I finally have figured out all the different plot points i'm gonna be hitting (yay!). I got hung up on something for awhile that made me not wanna work on this project, but I'm back at it. I think we'll end up with 6-7 parts! I have probably another 80-100 pages to draw lol. Also i got the app Magic Poser and it's AWESOME and I immediately used it to block out sets cuz MAN I hate backgrounds.

[6/10/24] HELLO. I'm sorry I've been shit at updating my masterposts lately. It's easiest to do from my computer, which I rarely use, and life has been happening. I also can't believe I bungled the queue and posted pg19 before pg18 i am very sorry 🤦 Eventually I'll have to turn this into an airtable base I'm sure, but until that day comes where I have like 100 pages of this comic we're stickin to the regular post lmao

[5/26/23] I got real caught up in doing summer of lawlu comics this week and this is the first week since the first week of April I haven't drawn new Life After pages and it feels weird 🙊

[5/19/24] More Luffy backstory comin' this week! :^)

[5/12/24] Updating now so get myself on schedule to update on Sundays like I had been with my other comic master post!

[5/8/24] Thank you to everyone who's liked/reblogged/comment on the first few pages!! It means the world to me that anyone's reading my silly little comics.

[4/28/24] HULLO. It’s happeninnng. I’ve spent the last few weeks working on this comic, and I gotta make this post so I can start queuing pages & link this in them! This is the most like….legit? Comic endeavor I’ve undertaken perhaps….ever. I’m very nervous about committing to how long it will need to be lol. This story is dear to my heart — zombie content is kind of my very favorite. I’ve always found it to be a great backdrop for exploring themes like grief, coping with change, community, and learning to live again. It’ll be a long haul but I hope you’ll ride it out with me!! Tomorrow I’ll be posting the first two pages. After that a page will post every Monday/Wednesday/Friday. As of this post I’ve completed over 20 pages so that I have a good lead on what’s posting and continuing to write, so I’m hopeful that’s a cadence I’ll be able to maintain. I’ll update this post weekly to include the most recent pages the way I do with my main comics master post. All pages will be tagged 'Life After' and I'll tag any pages with zombies in them with 'zombie' for blacklisting etc.

[justlemmeadoreyou]

a misfortune | (mechanic!harry part 1)

Okay, so here is my version of the grumpy!harry x sunshine!yn trope. I had midterms so this got a bit late! Sorry! I don't rhink you waited for my shitty writing, but here it is (forcefully)

masterlist | tip me! | ask box!

Summary: Harry is a grumpy asshole, but he is also a mechanic that you are in desperate need of. Sunshine!reader x Grumpy! harry trope

Word Count: ~2k

8 hours.

That's how long you've been in the backseat of your car, and chewing on your already swollen nails. All your belongings, from clothes to your oversized makeup bag, toiletries, blankets, bedsheets, and even your electronic gadgets, are crammed beside you on the backseat. Your life has spiraled into chaos because your landlord has kicked you out.

Tears well up in your eyes, blurring your vision as you recall the moments that have led you to this bleak situation. It isn't fair, which is something you think. That isn't true though. You haven't paid your proper rent in nearly six months, frequently stumbling home at obnoxious hours, blasting loud music when you were drunk and high, and you hadn't even bothered to check the 15-day eviction notice that arrived almost 20 days ago. So, yes, your landlord had every right to kick you out.

You were irresponsible, reckless, and didn't give two cares until you became homeless. With your car serving as an unwelcome shelter, you realize you should have been more responsible. You should have cared more about your living situation before it all came crashing down on you. If only you had taken your life more seriously, you wouldn't be stuck in your car on this cold, lonely night.

It was the beginning of November, and you had so many plans about decorating your small apartment. You had fetched out the Christmas lights too, planning on hanging them out the following weekend. The memory of those festive plans, the warmth of the holiday spirit, now feels like a distant dream.

You wipe away your tears, but they keep flowing. You shift some of your stuff down on the floor of the car to make some space to sleep in. You curl up into yourself in the small space, and after a few more tears, you're finally asleep.

You're woken by harsh knocks on your window. You try to open your eyes, but the sunlight pouring in through the window is so blinding that you have to squint and shield your face with your hand.

It's a man, who looks angry at you. You roll down the window a bit so you can hear what he's saying.

“Could you move your car out of here, please?”

You rub your eyes and finally get a look at your surroundings, and you see that you've basically parked at the entrance of a house.

“Yeah-yeah. I will. Sorry,” you grunt with a raspy voice, and he goes back inside.

You quickly fix your clothes and your hair, and grabbed the car keys from your pocket. Opening the door, you got out of the backseat and got back out front.

Pushing the key in, you turned it, but the engine didn’t start. You tried it again and again, biut all in vain.

Great.

Just fucking great.

Now even your car had given up on you.

You felt like crying all over again, this was all so heartbreaking. You had to get the car checked almost two months ago, when the check engine light had started to blink first.

You pulled out your phone and searched for a nearby garage. Hopefully, there was one that was 2 blocks away. But that meant you wouyld have to push your car two blocks.

You could also call a tow service, but that would take money, and money was something you were running short on.

With a loud sigh, you switched the handbrake on, and got out of the car.

Rolling up your sleeves, you started to push it. The car was so heavy, and you managed a good 200 meters, before you were sweating profusely, and almost gave up, putting your hands on your knees and breathing loudly.

A kind man offered to help, and thank lord he did. With lots of struggle and a good 15 minutes, you were finally able to reach the garage.

Quick Fix Auto

You read the garage name, before lockiong your car and walking in. It was still 8 pm, so you doubted getting any help at this hour.

“Hello?”

You called out tentatively as you entered the garage and walked further into the shop, past the cars and vehicles scattered out front. Hopefully, a second voice would call you back, or you would have had to wait for someone to come in.

“Yeah, I’m a bit busy. Be out in a minute,” the voice replied. It sounded British and thickly laced with an accent. You couldn't help but think that now a gorgeous British guy would see your horrible car, which was also your home, all wrecked up and messed up due to negligence. Bonus points to you for not even washing your face after waking up.

You briefly contemplated running away and finding another garage with an old mechanic. However, you realized you physically wouldn't have been able to do that. So, you took a deep breath, preparing to face the embarrassment and potential humiliation.

After a few moments, he came out, and boy, was he gorgeous. A white headband held his thick hair back, and below that was a beautifully shaped face with green eyes. His tan hands were covered in a bit of grease, and he had tools hanging from his upturned waistband.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, and you gulped hard, snapping back to reality from admiring his physique. Boy, was he pretty.

“Oh, um... I tried to start my car this morning, but it won’t start.”

“And what’s the issue? The battery is out, fuel is down?”

“I don’t know, that’s why I came here.”

“Jeez, your breath smells terrible. Alright, let me have a look at it. Keys?”

He extended his hand to take your keys while looking into your eyes. You squinted at him for his rude remark, then handed him the keys.

“You don’t have to be so rude, you know.”

He kept walking, ignoring your comment. As he reached your car, he stopped in his tracks when he saw your belongings inside it. He turned back to look at you, and you frowned. Eye bags, dark circles under your eyes, a sad face, and you hadn't even washed your face; you had to rush to get your car fixed. You were in bad shape.

He decided to draw a line and not throw questions at you. He opened your car and took a look inside, noticing that the check engine light was on.

“How long has this been on for?”

“Oh, that. Yeah, about... 2 months?”

He slumped his shoulders and came back out, walking to yhe front and opening the hood of the car. As soon as it went up, a big cloud of smoke escaped.

“Fuck. What did you do?”

He coughed a bit, taking a step back to let the smoke dissipate. You felt even more humiliated than before, but he seemed more focused on the issue with your car than making further remarks about your condition.

“Alright. So, this is not going to get fixed in a short while. It’s going to take atlest 2 days.”

“No! Where will I live?”

You exclaimed loudly, and his eyes widened.

You could book a hotel?”

“I don’t have money.”

“A motel?”

“How will I reach one? Most of them are out of town.”

“Right, so you could still sleep in it at night, but I lock the garage at 11. So, you will have to park it outside.”

She nodded her head, and he still felt bad for her.

“I’m Harry, by the way”

He extended the same grease-stained hand again, and she complied, shaking hands with him.

"I'm Yn." she said.

"There’s a bathroom at the back. You can clean up there if you want to. My staff comes in at 9, so you still have about half an hour."

She smiled at his kind offer. He might be rude and grumpy, but he wasn't a bad person.

"Thank you, Harry. I really appreciate it."

"Oh that's okay. But, you do have money to pay for your car, right?"

You did a quick calculation in your mind, and quickly came to the conclusion that you didn't have even that money.

"No, but- listen to me! My payday is here, so I'm gonna get paid soon. I have to buy few supplies first, and then I promise I will pay you as soon as possible. I'll borrow money from my friends."

"As long as I get paid, I don't care where you get the money from."

And the grumpiness was back.

"Okay! Can I go in?"

"Sure. Be my guest."

You got some stuff from the car and went inside the garage. walking all the way to the back, and finding the washroom. You locked the door and cleaned yourself up.

Meanwhile, Harry took a look at your car.

It was in a bad condition. it hadn't been serviced in over two years, and the engine oil hadn't been replaced in so long. The battery was old too. A lot of work had to be done. and he had no idea how he would manage when you literally lived in the car.

Meanwhile, you were happy to have gotten a place to brush and bathe. Initially, you thought you would have to go to a cafe or restaurant, and brushing and bathing there would’ve been embarrassing. Even though embarrassment and humiliation were your best friends now.

You walked out in clean clothes a while later. and saw your car standing at the same place, with no sign of Harry. You searched for him again, and found him at the back, working on the same car he had been in when you had arrived.

"Harry?"

"Yeah?"

"Why aren't you working on my car?"

He slid out from the bottom of the car, before replying, "I have other jobs too. First come, first serve. Plus, this one paid me in advance."

You frowned and flared at his words, and decided to deal with him later.

"So, can I take it, then? I have to go to work."

"No, I will work on it in the afternoon."

"Then how the hell am I supposed to reach work?"

"Many options, by foot, take the bus, order an Uber, Oh! Sorry! I forgot you didn't have money."

He mocked you once again, and this time, you seriously wanted to punch him across the face. Maybe you would, once your car was done. But right now, you have priorities.

"Alright, fine. But my stuff is in the car."

"Chill. Nobody's gonna take it. They might give things to you, though."

You rolled your eyes again, and went back to your car. Why did he have to be such a dick?

Gathering your bag, you stuffed your valuables, leaving only clothes and heavy articles behind. You shifted it to one corner, and draped a huge sheet to cover it.

"Okay, I'm leaving."

And once again, that grumpy asshole ignored you.

(next part)

divider by @firefly-graphics

okay, sorry if this sucked, i really don't know how to write l literally finished this at 2am, so really really sorry

taglist: @freedomfireflies @gurugirl @thechaoticjoy @styleslover-1994 @gem1712 @ellaorchard @bxbyysstuff @opheliaofficial07 @rafaaoli @tchlamqtsgf @the-mouse27 @indierockgirrl @vrittivsanghavi @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @drewrry @babyiamperfectforyou @whoreonmondays @avalentina

let me know if you want to be added or removed!

[fallingdownhell]

https://at.tumblr.com/fallingdownhell/sumeru-men-when-your-sisterbest-friend-tries-to/nwf4h3unm1ah

Could I request this ⬆️ but with Ayato, Kaeya, Diluc, Childe, Zhongli? Also, reader actually steps up and nearly goes apeshit with the "friend".

No angst, please!

Alright, alright, I heard you loud and clear. I'm trying my best for readers part, but I can't promise anything.

Also, this escalated quite a bit... hope none of you mind the length of this thing. I just don't know how to keep things short and simple

Characters included: Ayato, Kaeya, Diluc, Childe, Zhongli

Content: Gender neutral reader; she/her pronouns for your best friend; she tries to convince them to dump reader; some cursing; slightly suggestive on Ayato's part; not proof read yet!

Word count: 7.9k words

As always, thank you for requesting and hope you enjoy!

Ayato

I feel like Ayato is a man who would get into a relationship for one of two reasons

Number one would be it being a political type of thing, where the relationship and potential marriage would greatly benefit the Yashiro commission

Or he would not even consider the commission and just date you purely because he fell instantly in love with you and really just wants to court you

but regardless of what the reason might be, he would be loyal to you under any circumstances

he knows that there are many people out there who want to be on his good side, some of them even after his wealth and status

and yet, he would fight off anyone who would dare court him while being in a relationship with you

in that aspect, he learned a great deal from Thoma, so you better be grateful to him

It was a typical slow, mentally draining day for Ayato as the Yashiro commissioner yet again. Many people come to him with their problems, expecting him to magically have the solutions for them at the ready. It's not like he is some kind of know-it-all magician, capable of solving every little issue in this world. Yet people obviously believe him to be exactly that.

Honestly, it's exhausting most of the time. It was quite common for him to work late into the night, like it happened today again. When he finally leaned back a bit to stretch his sore back, he heard a soft knock on his office door. Knowing who would await him at the other side, he mumbled a soft "come in".

You slid the door open, revealing the form of your boyfriend to you. Instantly noticing his tired expression, you went to his side, gently holding his face in your hands.

"You have been working too much", you say after a long while of each of you staring into the others eyes.

You hear a low chuckle from him as he closes his eyes, and leans more into your touch. Having yearned for it the entire day and now finally being able to enjoy it again was one of the best feelings in the world to Ayato.

"You're right, my dear. As you are so often. How about we retreat for today?"

You were inclined to accept his offer, but just as you were about to do so, you remembered one other crucial detail.

"We can, after you eat something. You haven't done that today, have you?"

And as if to betray him, his stomach made a low rumbling sound just as Ayato was about to tell you a little white lie, that it wasn't so bad. Instead, he looked away from you as you giggled at the perfect timing.

"See? Now, you clean up here while I go and get you some light snack. Let's meet in our room, okay?"

He agrees and you gave him a quick kiss to the tip of his nose as a parting gift, before you made your way out of the room, silently, as to not disturb the other servants and residents from their slumber.

Ayato looks after you and as you're out the door, begins to make quick work of his tasks. It's not much to do anyways. Just pack away his writing utensils, stack and organize a few stray documents that he will worry about the next day.

While in the middle of doing this, he heard a soft knock on the door again. Ayato wonderd to himself why you would need to knock when you agreed to meet back at your room. And also, you two should be the only ones awake at this hour anyways.

Still, he answeres the knock with a simple "Yes?". Instead of an answer, the door to his office slid open again, but this time revealing a different figure to him.

He recognized her, a servant of the Yashiro Commission and also a dear friend to you. Though, he did wonder why she was awake at this hour as well.

"Do you need something?", he asked her as she just stood there, not saying a word.

"I... saw that the light was still on and just wanted to check on you, Lord Kamisato. It's getting quite late. Are you alright?"

"I see. I appreciate your concern, but I am quite alright. I'll be retiring for the night shortly."

After he said that, her eyes seemed to light up, but she quickly tried to hide it.

"O-oh, is that so?", she quielty mumbled as she took a few steps into the room, towards Ayato. He eyed her suspiciously, but refrained from saying or doing anything. She stopped in her tracks when she was standing only a few inches away from him.

"Do you want me to keep you company for the night?", she whispered, trying to sound seductive while she put one of her hands on Ayato's chest and looked up at him through her lashes.

In response to that, Ayato quickly snatched her wrist, holding her in a tight grip. Although, she seemed to interpret that gesture the wrong way, as a smile krept up her lips.

"Oh? That eager, Lord Kamisato?"

"You do know that I have a spouse, right?", he said firmly, still holding her wrist tightly.

"Oh please. As if someone as boring as (name) could ever please a man like you. You can admit it, you know. I can see that they are not enough for you. You can have so much more fun with me.", she purred at him, now putting her other hand on his chest.

It made Ayato want to throw up. Every fiber of his body was repulsed by this woman, her words and her actions. He just wanted to deal with this situation as quickly as possible, to get away from her and return to the comfort of your arms. He didn't care if he came across as rude, he did not care for her feelings. After all, she did just insult you in front of him, and he would not stand for that.

So, Ayato finally let go of her hand and took a step back to gain some distance between them. However, that didn't seem to appease her, as she was quick to follow him, that wicked smile still present on her lips. In that case, he had to resort to words as his weapon of choice against this woman.

"Stop this nonsense right now. I have no idea where you got the impression that I am the slightest bit interested in you, but that assumption is just wrong. Plus, I am not the type of man to just go behind my partners back like that."

"Aww, come on. Don't be such a killjoy. Plus, they don't have to know. I won't say anything if you don't~"

"Well, I already know. How about that?", you suddenly chime in, both Ayato and the woman jumping a bit at the sudden sound of your voice behind them. You were leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed in front of you and a dark expression on your face, directed at the person you thought to be a friend of yours.

"I was wondering what took you so long, dear. If I had known you were trying to fend off some filthy pest, I would have come to your rescue sooner.", you continued as neither of them said anything at your entrance. Your words and expression briefly becoming warmer as they were directed towards your lover, but quickly turning dark again when you turned back to the woman in front of you.

You waited a few more seconds, waiting for her to come up with some kind of excuse or something, but nothing came. So, you sighed, pushing yourself off the doorframe and slowly approaching the two of them.

"Glad that I finally got to see your true character. I always thought something was off about you, but still, I never would have taken you for one of those people." Your tone was low and dark, as you came to a halt in front of her.

"Now, you better screw off before I loose the last bit of my temper. And you better never approach any of us again, you hear me, bitch?"

You spat the last few words at her and she quickly ran out of the room, leaving you and Ayato behind. You looked after her for a few more seconds, before a deep sigh finally left your lungs and you turned around to your boyfriend, who was looking at you with a smirk on his lips.

"What?"

"Oh nothing... But, I have to admit, you're cute when you're jealous, (name)."

"Pffft, please. Me? Jealous? Of her? When I'm the one already dating you and having you all to myself?", you laughed, slowly beginning to relax again.

And Ayato still smirked as he began to lean down towards you. "True, I do belong to you. But maybe, it's time you lay claim on me again for everyone else to see as well.", he mumbled before he pulled you into a passionate kiss, a promise for the night in front of you..

Kaeya

Kaeya is a flirt, you and everyone else is very much aware of that fact

though when in a relationship, he would tone down that side of his personality. It's not completely gone, but compared to before it's like you're looking at an entirely different person

but you don't dislike this teasing and flirty side of him. It's part of his charm after all. So long as it's always directed at you and no one else..

Most people would believe Kaeya is more the type to play around than to actually bind himself to another. They also don't believe him to be a loyal person

Well, those people couldn't be farther from the truth. Because of his past, Kaeya is afraid of letting people close to him again. So if you were to manage to do just that and gain his trust.. you best believe that he will never let you go again, no matter what might be thrown his way

The music that was playing in the background of the tavern was as loud as usual. Kaeya was used to it at this point, the comfort of the Angel's Share being as trusted of a companion as the sword by his side.

It was a routine by now that he would swing by the tavern after his duties as a knight had been dealt with for the day. Usually, he would sit at the counter with either Venti or Rosaria to keep him company, sometimes even both at the same time. Those instances were always sure to escalate, so he was kinda glad it didn't happen too often.

Today however, neither of his usual companions were available, so he was doomed to sit at the counter all by himself. But that was quite alright, since he didn't plan on drinking that much anyways. After all, he was merely here to pass time waiting on you to finish your work, so he could take you on the date he promised to take you on today after you both were free.

But since he was done much sooner than you were, he had some time to kill, and the tavern was the first thing that came to his mind. So, he went to your place of work, to let you know that he would meet you there once you were done.

As Kaeya downed his second drink of the evening, he pointed for Charles, the barkeeper, to get him another one, while listening to the music some bard was playing. He was standing next to the entrance and Kaeya had to admit, that his music was rather good. It was a cheery, easygoing melody that went well with the laughter all across the tavern.

It seemed to be one of the bussier nights for the staff of the Angel's Share, seeing as the tavern was packed full of people, some of them already quite intoxicated even though it was still a fairly early evening.

Still, the loud atmosphere was relaxing to Kaeya and he only stopped looking around himself when his next drink was handed to him. Thanking Charles with a nod, Kaeya grabbed the mug and downed a few more sips, when he suddenly got a well-known feeling..

The feeling of being watched.

He tried scanning around the interior of the tavern again without looking conspicuous, but couldn't detect anyone who seemed to be watchful of him.

When the feeling subsided again, Kaeya also began to relax again. He hadn't realized how on edge he became just from that, so he let out a deep exhale. It did make him feel a bit better, but only for a few seconds, before he felt a presence now occupying the free stool next to him.

He turned his head towards that person, cautious of he he might find, when he recognized the figure to be your best friend.

Now, normally, any other person would relax upon seeing a familiar face, but not Kaeya. Not in this situation.

He always had a suspicion, that she was into him. She never made any advances towards him, but that could have been because you were always there with him. Kaeya had never been alone with her until now. And with the way she was eyeing him up and down while smirking at him, he was inclined to think that his suspicion was, indeed, correct.

"Well, would you look at that. What's the cavalry captain of the knights doing here, in this tavern, all by himself?", she began to speak. It was easy for Kaeya to detect the slight slur in her voice, indicating that she already had quite a few drinks already.

Still, he decided to play nice with her and entertain the both of them for the time being. Maybe some company wouldn't be so bad and he did still harber some hope that his assumption could be wrong after all.

"Enjoying a drink, obviously. What else would one be doing at a tavern?", he answered, the usual polite smile returning to his face. To everyone else, it might come across as sincere, but you now know that there was a difference. For a real, sincere smile coming from Kaeya was quite a rarity. But, the woman across him didn't know that, so she happily induldged in the conversation.

"Obviously, I know that. But, why all alone? I never see you without a certain someone accompanying you." Her words carried a distinct amount of poison in them when mentioning you. It didn't sit right with Kaeya at all.

"Oh, I'm actually waiting on them to finish their work. I promised them a date so that't where I'm taking them."

At the mention, her smile dropped and the look on her face changed to an annoyed one. "Seriously? God, Kaeya! When are you finally gonna dump her?!", she snapped at him, standing up from her stool so she could stand in front of him, mere inches away from him.

"Excuse me?", was all Kaeya was able to say, trying to lean back as much as possible to create space between them, but she didn't care for that. Instead, she got even closer, dangerously so, and Kaeya was beyond uncomfortable with the situation.

"You heard me. I wanted you since I first laid my eyes on you, but you never acknowledged me. And as soon as (name) comes along, you're all over them and completely ignore me!

I hate them so much! When are you finally gonna realize that I would be so much better for you? Just dump their lazy ass, they're never gonna be something big anyway. Come to my side, Kaeya!" As she said all that, she simultaneously began to claw on his clothes. Kaeya tried to push her away, but it seems that people were right when they said that drunk people seem to gain some kind of unexplainable strength.

"Are you out of your mind? NO! Now get off of me!", he yelled instead, still trying to get himself free. But she ignored it, instead reaching behind his neck and pushing his head down, trying to force a kiss onto him.

"AHH!", she yelled not even a second later, both in surprise and pain as her head got pulled back by her hair suddenly. She managed to pull herself free and both her and Kaeya were surprised to see you standing there, now putting yourself between the woman and your boyfriend. A furious look on your face, you seemed like you were about to loose your temper.

"He already said no, you bitch. You're really going so far as to assault someone because you don't get it your way? That's a new low, even for you." Your voice was ice cold and Kaeya shivered a bit from it, but he also had to admit that he did like this protective side of you. It was something he didn't get to see very often.

"I was just trying to safe him from your pityful grasp. He deserves someone better!"

"You mean, someone better like you? Come on, don't make me laugh. Who in their right mind would want a dirty street rat like you?", you lauged at her as she looked at you with shock. "Now fuck off before I completely loose myself."

That last sentence from you came out completely serious and cold, both her and Kaeya knew that you would not hesitate another second to fight her off if you had to. With one last, longing look at the man behind you, she grabbed her stuff and ran out the tavern door, leaving the two of you behind.

You let out a loud sigh as she was finally gone, turning around to Kaeya. "Are you okay?", you asked him, worry now written all over your face.

He smirked a bit, slipping out of his stool so he now stood in front of you, leaning down so he could put a hand to your cheek. "I am.", he whispered, leaning down to plant a soft kiss to your forehead. "Thanks for fending her off. That was really sexy."

You rolled your eyes at that, but didn't say anything against it. Instead, you pulled Kaeya in for a soft, sweet kiss. Both of you smiled before you finally made your way out of the tavern and to where Kaeya promised to take you.

Diluc

Oh boy.. I really love Diluc, but let's be honest here.. he has a lot of issues, that would directly pass over to the relationship, if he ever were to enter one

abandonment issues, trust issues, self worth.. Diluc has a lot of struggles

he makes sure to let you know beforehand, so you can back out of it if it's too much for you to handle. He won't go into any details, but he gets his point across

Now, if you decide to stay with him and help him work through all this, he would be head over heels in love with you. For someone to know everything about him, including his bad sides, and still deciding to stay with him?

He honestly never thought this would happen to him. Which is why he's all the more glad that you stayed and proved him wrong

It was the late afternoon and Diluc was still in the process of getting himself ready and presentable.

Today was the day of your one year anniversary and he had promised to take you on a cute little stargazing picnic. He had been looking forward to this day the entire week, trying to finish as much of his work as early as possible, so that nothing would come in the way today.

He checked his outfit over one more time in the mirror, looking for any holes or other form of dirt, but couldn't find anything. Then, he moved on to his hair, trying to tie it into a high ponytail. He knew that you loved it when he wore his hair like that, and he didn't mind it either way, so why not.

After all, Diluc wanted to spoil you today. Although technically this day is for the both of you, he just couldn't help but want to make it all about you. Because, after all, you were the one who chose to stay with him. To love him and show him that it was okay for him to love you as well.

It took some time, and he is still nowhere near a perfect partner for you, but he is trying. And you always tell him that him trying is more than enough for you and that you couldn't and would never ask anything more than that from him.

Diluc was so glad that you stumbled your way into his life. It may sound cliché, but he truly has no idea where he would be in life if you weren't there by his side to help guide him in the right direction.

Dare he even say, it was also thanks to you and your effort, that he is now slowly starting to reconcile with Kaeya. Their relationship was still rocky after years and years of miscommunication and suppressed feelings, but it was slowly starting to pick up and move into a... better direction, for lack of a better word.

He had so much to thank you for, and he swore to pay you back for it every day of his life that he got to spend with you. You would forever be the best thing to happen in his life, and he didn't care how down bad that sounded.

As he was finally done with preparations, and giving himself one last glance through the mirror, a soft knock on the door brought him out of his head and back into reality. Confusion written over his face even more, as Adelinde opened the door and walked a few steps into the room.

"My apologies, Master Diluc, but it would seem that you have a visitor. I informed her of the bad timing and to come back another time, but she insisted. I directed her towards your study room, she is waiting for you in there.", she informed him, her head lightly bowed down.

"Thank you, Adelinde. I will deal with them shortly.", Diluc answered, though obviously annoyed at the situation.

Why today? And why now?

All he wanted was for you and him to spend a nice evening together. And now someone wasn't even going to allow him that? Not if he had a say in it. He would just go in there and deal with the visitor swiftly, then make his way to Mondstadt, where he promised to pick you up.

Once he made sure that he was presentable so he wouldn't have to return to his room again, he went out and closed the door behind him. He walked quickly, having a goal already in his mind, so he wanted this situation to be over as soon as possible.

He gave to quick knocks to the door of his study room, to inform the person inside of his arrival, before opening the door and stepping inside.

Upon his entry, a woman who until now had been sitting in one of the comfortable armchairs stood up, facing his way. It took Diluc a moment, but he soon recognized the figure as a close friend of yours. He saw her from time to time, but he never had much to do with her, they never had an extended talk or conversation, so Diluc had no idea why she was here now and what she could want from him.

"You came..", she said, like she couldn't actually believe it.

"It would be quite rude of me to just leave a guest and not greet them, wouldn't it? So, please, state your business with me. And, not to sound rude, but please make it quick. I have somewhere important to be in a bit."

"That's why I'm here..", she mumbled quietly.

"What was that?"

"Nothing!", she exclaimed, a little startled. Trying to mask her nervousness with a chuckle, she began to play with her hair while looking everywhere else but at the man standing in front of her.

A good minute passed without her saying anything else and Diluc was growing more and more annoyed with her. Was she just here to waste his time?

"Look, if you have nothing to discuss with me, then-!"

"No! I- I mean, I do have something to discuss. I just.. don't know where to start..", she got quiet near the end again, making it hard for Diluc to understand her, but he did.

"If this will require more time, I have to ask you to move it to another day. I really don't have the time right now.", Diluc simply replied, already kind of mad at her that he wasted more time here than he had to. He turned around and was about to leave, when the woman behind him spoke up again.

"I like you!", she yelled, which caused Diluc to halt in his steps and turn to look at her, a bewildered look on his face.

"What did you say?"

"I like you, Diluc. I have for a long time. But I never had the courage to tell you and then (name) got in the picture. Honestly, I hated them the moment you and them got together.

They took you from me! It should be me by your side, not them! I deserve you so much more than some pesky lowlife like them!", she still yelled, but was now slowly moving towards Diluc.

The man, still surprised by what was happening right now, didn't move away, and she apparently took that as a sign to continue on her little rant.

"I know you think that you love them, but trust me, you don't. You may feel like that now, but I am the one meant for you. I can make you so much happier than you could ever think. Just give me a chance, Diluc.", she pleaded as she arrived in front of him.

She extended an arm, about to lay her hand on his shoulder, when he suddenly caught her wrist mid air. His grip was tight, and the look he threw at her full of disgust. She flinched a bit as she saw that, but still tried to stand her ground.

"Listen closely", Diluc said, his tone hard and cold, as he looked into her eyes, unforgiving. "(Name) will forever be the only one for me. No one else could ever hope to come close to what they mean to me. Especially not you. The fact that you came here, to berate and talk bad about someone who thinks of you as their friend, trying to steal their lover away. And for what? Some silly illusion you created in your head?

My top priority will always be (name). No one will ever come inbetween me and them, no matter what you might say or come up with."

He quickly let go of her wrist now, like her skin was suddenly made out of some kind of acid and it burned him on the touch. The look of disgust still evident on Diluc's face, as he took a step back towards the door.

"Now, please excuse me but I have a date to go on with my lovely parnter. And just to be perfectly clear, I would advise you to stay away from them and me from now on. And if I were to catch wind of you putting out rumors about them, I will not hesitate to act against you."

With that being his parting words, Diluc left the study room and made his way down to the main hall, where Adelinde was waiting down by the stairs.

"Please escort our guest out of the mansion as soon as possible. And make sure to let the other staff know that she is not welcome back here anymore.", Diluc informed Adelinde, who bowed her head in understanding.

"As you wish, Master Diluc. I wish you a pleasant night.", she said, before making her way up the stairs.

After that, Diluc left the mansion and made his way back to the city of Mondstadt. He appreciated the walk, as he was able to clear his head a bit before he would see you again, which was just what he needed after that encounter.

Once he arrived and saw you waiting for him by the fountain, all the negative emotions within him washed away again, his heart feeling at peace.

He greeted you with a soft kiss, which you reciprocated. He took you with him to Windrise, where the two of you would have your picnic. On the way there, he told you all about what had happened just about a few hours prior to your reunion.

It was fair to say that you considered the friendship with her to be over and you thanked Diluc over and over again for defending you, while also apologizing to him that he had to deal with that in the first place. But not to worry, because you made it more than up with the cuddles he got from you afterwards.

Childe

Childe is a family person through and through

Like, they have the final say wether his relationship whit you would last or not. Not in the sense of approval, more like if you get along with his parents and siblings

If they like you and you also get along with them well, he would be over the moon

also has a pretty high rank thanks to his position as a fatui harbinger, so people know not to mess with either of you, unless they want to be punished

Childe, I think, is actually one of the most loyal Genshin boys

He would stop at absolutely nothing to ensure your safety and to make you feel loved. The only way he would allow this relationship to end, is if either one of you would be to fall out of love with the other. But, at least for his part, that probably won't ever happen

Since his return to Snezshnaya a few days ago, Childe has been stuck in his office at the fatui headquarters. It was required of him to finalize his reports on his latest missions, which meant for him to sit in his office the entire day, write paper after paper, then return home in the evening, only to resume the process the next day.

It has been tiring for him. He never would have thought that dealing with paperwork could be this tiring. No wonder the higher ranking harbingers all have some kind of sectretary who do that work for them.

In fact, Childe has been so tired out from writing these reports, that he didn't get any proper training in these days. Instead, he always returned right back home to your side, almost always falling on top of you on the couch. If it weren't for you keeping him somewhat coherent, he would instantly pass out on the couch, not to be woken up until the next morning. You gently kept him awake long enough for him to take a shower and eat dinner with you, before you both went to bed together, where Childe hugged you even closer to him.

It has become some kind of new routine at this point and although you didn't mind it all that much, you clearly saw how exhausted your boyfriend was from all this. Even more so since he wasn't able to pursue his usual stress relief with the training.

You could clearly see how tired he still was, sitting next to you eating his breakfast, his eyes looking almost blank and lifeless. It made your heart ache at the sight.

"So.. do you know how much longer it'll take until you've finished all the reports?", you cautiously asked, not wanting to stress him out even more in the early morning hours.

"At least a few more days..", Childe quietly answered, the weariness clearly evident.

You thought about what you could do to make him feel a little better, at least, when an idea sparked in your head.

"Well, I can't really help you with your work, but, if you want to, I could bring you lunch today. Your mom taught me how to make your favourite."

At that, his eyes visibly brightened up as he looked at you. "Really? When did that happen?"

"While you were out on your mission in Liyue. I had some time on my hand and I thought it would be a nice surprise but I didn't get around to making it yet.", you answered, glad that such a simple thing was able to cheer your boyfriend right back up.

He got up and engulfed you in a big hug, placing little kisses all over your face. "Thank you, (name). I love you so much."

You giggled as you guys spend the rest of your morning together before it was time for Childe to leave again.

...

His mood this day was by far better than the days before, and his underlings had no idea wether that was a good thing or if their impending doom was approaching them.

But as more hours went by and nothing drastic had happened yet, they decided that it had to be something good.

Childe was constantly humming in his office, the writing part was getting much easier now that he got a hang of it. The occaissonal troop came into his office every now and then, awaiting for new orders from him.

He dealt with them every time before resuming his reports until one particular group came to him. He knew one of the members better than the others, namely because it just so happened that she was a friend of yours, who joined the ranks of the fatui a few weeks ago.

She got assigned under Childe, but they haven't really been working together yet, as shortly after he was sent out to his mission on Liyue, which took him a few weeks to finally complete. And since then, he had been locked up here.

Anyway, back to the present. The leader of that small group gave a quick report to Childe, informing him of their accomplishments. The harbinger only nodded, listening to them.

"Alright, sounds good. For now, I want you guys to go to the training grounds. Improve on your strenghts and get rid of your weaknesses. This will be your task for the following week. After that time, you will face me in battle again, to assess your progress.

That would be all.", he said to dismiss them. They all hurriedly made their way out of the room, except for one member of the group. The woman stood still in front of Childe, and it took him a moment to realize that she was still standing there.

"Hmm? Was there something else you needed?"

"Well.. I have a bit of a personal question, if you would allow it, Lord Harbinger.", she answered respectfully, bowing her head at him a bit.

Childe thought it over for a second, but didn't think anything bad of her request, so he allowed her to ask her question.

"Thank you. It's about (name)", she said and the mention of your name both set him on edge and also brought a small smile to his face. You just had that effect on him every time, even after months of dating already.

"What is it that you see in them? Why are you with them? I just don't understand it."

"What about it don't you understand?", Childe asked, bewildered as he sensed the obvious hostility she seemed to harbour when talking about you.

"I mean, they're just so boring and bland. I don't get what you see in them. Surely they can't be enough to satisfy you. You could have anyone else, you have so many better options. Why them?"

After her little rant was over, Childe stood up from his place behind his desk, walked around in front of it, and leaned against the table, crossing his arms in front of him.

"And let me guess.. you think you would be better suited for me than them, am I right?"

She nodded as she took a step forward, towards him, but one ice cold glare from Childe let her freeze in place. But she got her composure back quickly, returning his gaze.

"I do.", she stated, holding her chin up high, trying to look more confident than she currently felt.

Childe continued to look at her a few more seconds, before averting his eyes and sighing in disappointment.

"I think I've heard enough. Just so you know, you could never be enough for me. (Name) is more than enough, they are the perfect match for me. And I'm most definitely not about to give up on that for some random chick that decides to throw herself at me.

Anything you want to add, (name)?"

The last sentence was said a bit louder by Childe, knowing that you had been standing outside the door and listening in on the conversation. Upon mentioning you, you entered the room and by the surprised look on the womans face, she didn't realize that you were actually present.

"Not really, I think you already made yourself perfectly clear.", you said, your look at her as cold as Childe's was.

"We're over. Can't believe I ever was friends with someone like you.", was the only thing you felt like adding to the situation, before the woman ran out of the room without another word, feeling utterly humiliated.

You and Childe both looked after her, before looking at each other. Then you guys burst out into laughter at how ridiculous this entire situation was.

After you had calmed down again, you guys shared the food that you made for him in his office, you sitting on his lap since he wouldn't allow you to sit anywhere else. It was safe to say that Childe acted a bit more clingy with you for the next few days.

Zhongli

It has been quite some time since Zhongli's last relationship and even though he has an understanding of the principles, the more intimate details of it are kind of lost on him

have some patience with him and teach him the ropes of it again and you will be rewarded with one of the most loving and caring partners one could ever wish for

he also tends to be a little bit on the jealous side, but he means no harm in it. He knows you're more than capable of standing up for yourself, but he can't help it. He is your partner after all, it's only natural he wants to protect you

Also a very loyal man. If he chooses a partner, he stays with them through all the good and bad times until the bitter end. Whatever form that end will take..

Zhongli let out a heavy sigh as he was finally done with his work for the day. Who knew that the work of a consultant could be this demanding?

Hu Tao had him staying late for the past two weeks, since, as she said, work had been piling up and she needed all the help she could get.

While you were understanding of the situation, not minding him coming home later to help out his boss, Zhongli did mind it very much.

Because now, work kept getting in the way of his quality time with you. While he was stuck here, he could be home with you, snuggling up on the couch, or out on a date with you.

Come to think of it, it had been quite some time since you two last went on one. Perhaps he should take you out to Wanwen Bookhouse again, with a nice dinner afterwards at Liuli Pavilion. That sounded like a good idea.

Still thinking about this, and possible other locations where he could take you to, he continued to tidy up his workplace, so that he could finally leave as soon as he was done with that.

Hu Tao had already left earlier today, claiming she would be gone for some type of commission and left him the keys to lock the place up after he was done for the day.

Once he was done cleaning up, he went outside and locked the door, putting the keys into his pocket to keep them safe. He would return them to Hu Tao again once his well deserved weekend would be over. Oh, how he longed to spend those blessed days enveloped in your arms, hoping you would never let go of him again.

Gazing up at the sky, he noticed that it was still quite early. He still did some overtime, but he did get off earlier today than the days prior. So, Zhongli decided on the spot to surprise you with some of your favourite food.

He went over to Wanmin Restaurant, which coincidentaly was also on the way to your shared house, to pick up something to eat for the both of you.

Upon approaching the vendor, Chef Mao immediatly recogniced the man.

"Ah, Mister Zhongli! Good evening! The usual?", he asked in a cheery tone, to which Zhongli agreed to.

While waiting for his food to be done, he took place on one of the stools outside the building, looking around the streets. It wasn't quite as busy as it was during the day, but there were still fairly many people out and about, doing their business.

"Hey! Zhongli!", a voice greeted behind him, so the man turned around to see a dear friend of yours approaching him and taking place next to him on an empty stool.

Zhongli gave her a gentle smile, not minding her presence at all. Maybe some company would be good for the time he had to keep waiting for the food to be done.

"Good evening. What brings you here on this fine day?", he asks her, trying to engage in some small talk with her.

"Oh, nothing much. I was just out for a walk when I saw you sitting here all alone.", she smiled, leaning a bit closer to him. Zhongli noticed this, but didn't think anything of it, which is also why he didn't say anything about it.

"Ah, yes. I am merely waiting for it to be done cooking, so that I can surprise (name) with it at home. I have been working late for the past two weeks so I hope she will accept this small piece of apology."

Upon mentioning your name, he noticed how her expression turned a bit sour, but it was gone so quickly the next second that he thought he just imagined it.

"Is that so..", she mused, seeming to be lost deep in thought.

After that, the conversation died out and a sort of uncomfortable silence fell between Zhongli and your friend. Not knowing what to best do in this kind of situation, he just remained silent, still patiently waiting.

A few more minutes passed and finally, Chef Mao came to Zhongli again, this time with two containers of food in his hands.

"Here you go. Sorry it took so long, busy day today."

"Not a problem.", Zhongli reassured him as he handed the man his money. He was about to say his goodbyes to your friend, when she suddenly grabbed him by the arm.

"Wait!", she said, suddenly having a form of urgency to her voice that made him halt.

"Yes? What is it?"

"I... I want you to break up with (name)!", she exclaimed, shocking Zhongli with her words. Why would he say such a thing.

The confusion obviously written all over his face, the woman sighed as she got even closer to him.

"I am in love with you, Zhongli. And I want to be with you. I don't care if I start out as just a side chick for you, so long as you break up with them and choose me in the long run.

Trust me, you'll see for yourself just how inferior (name) is to me in every aspect of life. Bet they aren't even any good in bed. I know you're not satisfied with them, so why not enjoy yourself with a little fun on the side?"

Zhongli couldn't believe what he was hearing. He knew how much you trusted her, so for her to betray that trust you put in her so easily, it made his heart ache for you. But it also made him furious. How dare she talk about you like that in front of him? You were everything to him, and you were definitely more than enough.

Anger slowly krept its way up inside him, being more and more evident in the way his gaze turned cold and his hands tightly gripped the containers he was holding.

But before he could let his anger out on that woman, he heard an all too familiar voice call his name. "Zhongli!"

There you were standind, a few feet away from them and slowly walking over to your boyfriend.

"Hey (name)!", the woman cheerfully said, putting on a seemingly perfect act in front of you, being all nice and friendly again, like she wasn't just trying to steal Zhongli away from you.

"What a surprise to see you here. We were just talking about-!"

"About how you want to be the side piece of my boyfriend? Yeah, I heard that.", you said in a very matter-of-fact way, it caught her completely off guard.

"Huh?", was all she was able to get out, a look of bewilderment present on her face. You, however, have heard enough and you were done with her.

So, you only rolled your eyes at her, before lowering your voice, trying to sound as intimidating as you could. "Listen here, you bitch. He is taken. You had all the time and chances before I met him, and now, he is mine.

So back the fuck off before I go off on your fake ass face."

Panic now written all over her face, she took a few steps back. "You wouldn't.. You're crazy!"

"Oh, but I would.", you growled, taking a step forward, which finally caused her to turn around and run away from the two of you.

Relieved, you let out a sigh and turned around to your boyfriend, who had witnessed the entire scene.

"Sorry you had to deal with that.", you apologized sheepishly, gaze now turned to the ground.

"Don't apologize, my dear. After all, I should be the one apologizing to you, since you just lost a friend because of me. But, I do want to say, I hope you know that I would never choose someone else over you."

"I know that.", you nodded as you looked up at him, offering him a warm and loving smile. Ahh, how he had missed that smile the entire day. He just had to lean down and give you a soft kiss, which you very gladly reciprocated.

[masonmontz]

notes: heeeellooo everyone :) i confess that it was VERY difficult to finish writing this fic, i couldn't get inspired and have ideas at all, but i did my best and i hope you like it (and don't worry, i think my inspiration is coming back so i can write more)

REMEMBER: english is not my first language

angst/fluff word count: 6,2k

PART 1 BONUS

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“Why don't you answer my calls?” Candice fought as soon as you opened the door to your apartment for her to enter. “You haven't talked to me in a week.”

“Sorry.” You spoke and closed the door, walking to the couch and lying down, exactly as you were before getting up to open the door. 

“What happened?” 

“Nothing.”

“Y/N!”

“I don't want to talk about it.” 

“But you have to, I’m your best friend.” She whimpered and sat down next to you. “You and Mason were fighting in the street, Woody can't talk to him, Declan can't either and you two didn't go to Mexican night last night.” 

You couldn't stop thinking about your fight, and for a week you woke up, went to work, came home, and ignored everyone. It was strange to think that you were sorry for the things that happened between you and Mason, you treated him so badly for so long that you didn't think he would be able to forgive you. 

Well, he treated you badly too. But you treated him worse.

“I always thought he never called me because he was a jerk, but he said I never left him my number or name.” You closed your eyes, sighing. “I don't know how, but he never found the paper I left, it must have fallen or something like that.”

“No way.”

“I've hated him for all this time, and I feel so guilty because I accused him of terrible things he never did.”

Don't you get tired of being a bitch?

“I can’t believe that all this time you could have been friends, I always said you would be great together.” Candice was outraged.

“Sometimes we can't help things, Candy, there's nothing I can do now.”

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“You’re telling me that she left her number but you never found it?” Lauren asked Mason, as Declan held Jude in his arms and the little boy slept soundly after dinner. Declan invited him to dinner because Mason had been missing since the fight with you, the one everyone witnessed, two weeks ago.

“That's basically it, and she treated me badly for so long because I never called. I'm not innocent, I was also stupid to her, but I didn't know why she hated me and I just followed the script.”

“You two are idiots.” Declan spoke quietly, and Mason nodded. He got up, grabbed his keys and cell phone, just wanting to go home because he had a headache and Mason has early training tomorrow. 

“It doesn't matter now, it's over.”

“You like her.” Lauren accused and Mason froze, not knowing what to say. “You were disappointed that she didn't leave her number because you liked her, and she liked you, so she hated that you didn't call. If you didn't have feelings for each other, you wouldn't fight the way you did for a year.”

“I don’t like her, Lauren.” 

“So you swear to me that in all this time you didn't think of her as anything more than a friend?” Mason was quiet. What could he say? Lauren likes to touch the wound and she seems to know him very well. “I knew it.” 

“I think she's pretty, but what's wrong with that? I just don't think we would work, we've been hurting each other for so long, it's irreparable damage.”

“It's never too late.”

“It's too late now, Lauren, I'm sorry.”

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

It's not like you and Mason had become friends, but in the last few months you were able to be in the same room without arguing, but you barely spoke to each other, in fact, you ignored each other's presence.

You hadn't forgiven Mason and he hadn't forgiven you either, but at least your friends were relieved that they didn't have to choose sides to support, or witness the childish arguments. It was a relief for everyone, even the two of you.

Ah, summer is amazing, you thought as you enjoyed the Greek sun. You were all together in Greece for a few days of vacation and to celebrate Woody and Candice's engagement. It was all a luxury and you could never afford this vacation, you never had someone to cook all your meals for you like you did in this house. Wow, Rose really had fairy hands for cooking. 

You took a sip of your drink as you looked at them in the pool. Mason and Ben were playing to see who could do the best jump, Declan and Lauren were laying on the other side of the pool, and Woody and Candice had disappeared into the house. You rolled your eyes when you noticed Reece and Lily talking and you bet to yourself that in a few days they would be having sex.

“Y/N, why didn't you bring your boyfriend?” Ben asked and you looked at him, he had just dived in and was wiping his eyes like a child and Mason was stuck to a pineapple float.

“First, he’s not my boyfriend and second, he got back with his ex” you said and saw Ben holding himself back from laughing at you. “You can laugh, I knew talking so much about my ex wasn't normal.”

Ben let out a loud laugh and Mason laughed too, then even you couldn't help but laugh at the situation. Peter was a nice guy but it was obvious that he loved his ex-girlfriend and wanted more than anything to get back with her.

Mason had blonde hair and you hated it from the first second you saw him, not because you hated blonde hair, but you hated how sexy and handsome he looked with that hair.

And you also hated that you were noticing Mason more than usual. God, it was going to be a long ten days.

You and Mason hadn't exchanged a word since you arrived a day ago, but you also had nothing to talk about, things had been cleared up when you fought for the last time but you hadn't forgiven each other, and until that happened there was no reason to talk.

Sometimes you caught yourself staring at him when he was laughing or talking to someone, and even today at the beach you almost drooled when Mason came out of the sea like Poseidon.

Lily was right, you need to find some man to have fun with or you'll go crazy.

“A man obsessing over his ex is never a good thing” Ben grumbled and you nodded, getting up from the lounge chair to get another drink. “Bring us some beers too.”

“Just because I’m very nice” you mumbled, a little drunk because of the amount of drinks you had already had. You had all already drunk during the day, the sun was starting to set and soon you would have to start getting ready for the party the boys wanted to go to.

You handed the beer to Mason and Ben and lay down again, but this time Mason didn't hide it as he stared at you walking back and forth in your bikini, and for a few seconds you felt desired.

It doesn't matter now, you and Mason would never have anything again, you've hurt each other for too long. It's ridiculous to even consider having something with him after so long. 

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“So, are you from here?” the tall man asks in your ear as he dances beside you, and you just answered ‘no’ as you looked at what was happening in front of you.

Mason was almost rubbing himself against the woman pressed against him, a brunette with lips so big they looked like two sausages. It was a ridiculous scene, obviously, but he didn't seem to care, and neither did the other ten women who were trying to get his attention.

Just because you spent one night together doesn't mean it will happen again. It's better this way.

“Excuse me, what's your name again?” you asked the guy a little embarrassed, he had been trying to talk to you since you arrived and you just paid attention to Mason surrounded by girls.

“Carlos” he replied and you agreed, and he really is very handsome, longer brown hair, tanned skin, he looked like a surfer. Lily and Reece were gone, Ben was talking to a red-haired girl, and Woody, Candice, Declan, and Lauren were dancing together in the middle of the dance floor.

You looked back up and Mason was kissing the woman, and you could see exactly when her friends were taking pictures of them kissing. Well done, so he would stop being stupid when the photos appear on the internet.

“Carlos, would you like to go somewhere else with me?” 

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“Who’s being loud?” you asked as soon as you came down the stairs, angry that they woke you up.

Carlos left when the sun was rising, and you didn't hide it when you kissed him just as Mason walked into the house with the same girl he was with at the nightclub.

Just to make sure you weren't in last place.

“Oh, sorry princess, did we wake you?” Ben asked sarcastically and you pointed your middle finger at him. “None of us were being noisy in the early hours of the morning.”

“Guys, Louise will be staying with us for a few days.” you heard Mason saying and turned around, watching him walking down the stairs shirtless and the girl walking down behind him.

Louise clung to Mason and kissed him, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the two of them. You were wearing a baggy t-shirt that was stolen from some ex-boyfriend of yours, and you had a headache from lack of sleep, so the beach wasn’t an option today.

“Enjoy the beach.” You said before going back to your room and sleeping for a few more hours. You woke up in the middle of the afternoon and the house was quiet, so you went downstairs to make yourself something to eat.

Mason was in the kitchen, he was sitting drinking a glass of juice while playing with his phone and saw you as soon as you walked in. A shiver ran through your body when Mason looked you up and down.

“Hey” you mumbled, aware that you were wearing a bikini and shorts. You looked around but there was no sign of Louise or the others.

“Hey” He mumbled back, leaving his phone on the counter as you grabbed eggs to make scrambled eggs.

“Do you want it too? I'll make eggs for you.” You asked, and part of you didn't want to do it, but another part of you wanted to learn how to deal with Mason and make things work between you. And also to make life easier for everyone who lives with you and witnessed all the fights.

“If you don't mind cooking for me, I'll accept.” 

You shrugged and grabbed the ingredients, knowing Mason was watching your every move.

“Where is everyone?” You asked as you cracked some eggs.

“They went to the village to visit some shops after the beach.”

“Why didn't you go?” 

“I'm sunburned, I wanted to take a shower and rest.”

In fact, Mason was all burned and you couldn't help but laugh when you saw his red skin, as well as his face. 

You didn't even realize when you and Mason started talking and laughing together, and it was the first time that happened since you met again. The first night you were together you had a lot of fun, but that had never happened again and you didn't even think it would happen again someday.

“She asked me to give her the gum in my mouth and she stuck it in the woman's hair” Mason said laughing as you ate, and he was telling you about the time Candice put gum in the hair of a woman who flirted with Woody.

“She's crazy, she once argued with a woman in the middle of the mall over a prize the mall was offering.”

“Woody and her are a good match, I think they found each other.”

“Yeah, I know, I'm happy for them.”

You didn't want to, but you looked at Mason and he was looking at you differently, and you were embarrassed by his gaze, because no one had looked at you so deeply in a long time.

“So about what happened-”

“Hi guys” you heard Louise's voice interrupting you and sighed, shrugging and ignoring what you were going to say to Mason. He smiled when he saw everyone arrive, and Louise hurried to walk up to Mason to kiss him.

Candice walked up to you and hugged you, handing you a bag.

“Hey honey, I brought some things I thought you might like.” 

“You really are the best of all.”

You ignored Louise kissing Mason and all the noises they made, but it was funny to see when she pulled Mason's plate and ate all his food without permission, his face was hilarious.

You went to the pool right after, the sun hadn't set yet and it was hot, so within seconds you and Ben were splashing each other. 

“Lou, aren't you going to get in the pool?” Candy asked Louise, who was lying down sunbathing.

“No, I don't want to ruin my hair and look ugly.” 

You and Lily looked at each other, and you had been diving for several minutes, or else betting to see who could stay underwater the longest. It was fun, and afterwards you felt like a fool for liking children's games.

“Mase, can you get me some champagne?” she asked Mason who was holding Ben's legs as he tried to dive, and he sighed before nodding and getting out of the pool and getting her a glass of champagne. 

“Oh, I would like some fruits too.”

At least Mason would pay for his sins with her.

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“She laughs too loud, my head hurts.” You told Lily as soon as you two went to the room, because Louise was actually laughing so loudly that it was bothering you. 

“She doesn't laugh out loud, you're jealous.” Lily accused, pointing her finger at you. 

“Why would I be jealous?” You asked, trying to sound convincing.

“Because you like Mason.” She said and threw herself on the bed.

“What? I don’t like Mason.” You spoke with your hand on your hip as you looked at Lily.

“Yes you do and yes Mason likes you too.” 

“He doesn't like me, don't be silly.”

“Yes, and he's so attracted to you that he brought someone else when he saw you leaving the club with Carlos.”

“This is stupid, we are not in kindergarten anymore.”

“It's not like you two act like adults when you're together.”

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“I'm not in the mood for another party today” you muttered as you followed Lily, but the problem was that you were already arriving at the party. It was so hot, you were still tired from the night before and there were a lot of people there, but the place was so beautiful that you thought you could enjoy the night a little. 

“Don't be boring, you look beautiful and we are in Greece, there is no time to sleep.”

Lily gave your names to the security guard, and being "friends" with Mason had its perks, since he put everyone's name on the list and you could even skip the line. You pretended not to hear some women complaining about the two of you.

You snorted when you saw Louise clinging to Mason once again, and she didn't let go of him for a second, it was impossible to talk because she was always by his side talking nonsense or talking about her father's millions of euros.

Reece handed you both a drink as soon as you arrived and soon you were able to let loose and were dancing with the girls, and it was really fun to remember when you and Candice used to hang out together in the clubs of London. Lily and Lauren loved to party as much as you two did.

“Why are there so many handsome men here? I feel like I'm in paradise.” Lily asked and you laughed, and you knew she and Reece were having sex, she showed up with a hickey on her neck in the morning, but Lily and Reece were two free spirits and weren't going to tie each other down quickly.

Twenty minutes later you and Lily were dancing on top of a small table, and you were aware that there were many people looking at the two of you. Mason, unlike the others, looked at you with a face that showed he wasn't enjoying the show.

He's the one who's losing.

The music playing too loud prevented you from hearing people, and the alcohol in your head made you dance more and more along with Lily, the two of you dancing and shaking together while several guys watched.

And that's what made Mason's blood boil, seeing those guys drooling over you while he could do nothing but watch.

Louise beside him was making him angry. She thought she hired Mason as her personal butler, because she made him do everything for her and Mason couldn't stand to hear her voice anymore.

For Louise, everything was bad, nothing was as luxurious as what she deserves, she threw it in Mason's face several times that she was with better players and with more money, but... Mason couldn't handle knowing that you took that guy home the night before. So he asked her to stay. It was a mistake, because when Mason found out that Carlos had left and Louise had stayed, he knew that it could be even worse for him.

And now Mason could do nothing but watch you dance and know he couldn't touch you.

Mason never hid from himself how much he wanted you, even in all those months you spent fighting, hating each other and exchanging insults. Mason also didn't lie when he realized he had never met such a fun woman, who treated Mason just as Mason and not as Mason Mount, the football player.

You guys talked so much that night, Mason was sure you were the woman for him. 

Until you weren't anymore.

He really didn't expect so much hate, so much hurt and so many insults, it had been a terrible few months and Mason had no strength to continue this senseless war.

God, Mason still wanted you every minute. When he looked at you when you were distracted, or he looked at you smiling at someone or something, or when he watched you sigh when you ate a delicious meal.

Everything was messed up, you couldn't be adults enough to deal with things, but not even these months of arguing and being apart would change how Mason felt about you.

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

“Why are there so many guys looking at them?” Mason said to Ben, who just smiled and continued dancing to the rhythm of the music. Mason rolled his eyes and sighed, and he looked like a security guard around you and Lily, he also noticed the wolves wanting to get closer to the sheep.

“Mason, can you get me another drink?” Louise appeared with an empty glass, and her lipstick was smeared and Mason realized that she had kissed someone. Inside he was happy, it was easier for her to leave.

“No, have you met anyone?” Mason asked and pointed to his own lips, so Louise widened her eyes, trying to hide it. “Hey, it’s fine, I just don't think we have anything in common, you can enjoy your vacation, but don't expect anything from me.”

“Are you dismissing me?” 

“If you want to call it that.” Mason shrugged and he felt like an asshole, but he also couldn't lie to Louise and lead her on. Mason would never be a good guy for her.

“No one has ever broken up with me.” 

“Sorry, I'm not a good guy.”

Louise didn't have a happy face and Mason even felt scared, but soon after she just left stomping her feet in anger while Mason sighed in relief. The peace Mason felt for five seconds disappeared when he looked at you once more and saw a blond man nearby, trying to put his hand on you while you danced with Lily.

Why can't people stay away? 

And when he put his hand on your thigh Mason could clearly see that you didn't like it, so he walked over to you, because Mason may have been a jerk, but he would still defend anyone from an idiot.

“Hey, get out of here.” 

You didn't hide your surprise when you heard Mason pushing that guy who had been trying to convince you to go to the bathroom with him for minutes. 

“And who are you? Her boyfriend?”

Lily now stopped dancing and stood beside you as you watched the guy mock Mason, and you could tell how much this irritated him. 

You threw yourself at Mason and scared him, but smiled when the guy swallowed hard and left, leaving you alone. You were hugging Mason's neck and he put his hands on your waist, holding you up as you staggered.

“Thank you Masey Masey.” You spoke and let go of him, who opened his mouth to say something but gave up, so you and Lily left towards the bar.

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

The morning was different, you didn't do anything different from other days but there was something strange in the air.

You and Mason hadn't said a word to each other since the night before, but you remembered exactly what happened. Your heart raced every time you looked at him, and of course you noticed that Louise wasn't around, which was a relief.

You smiled as you watched Declan try to knock Lauren into the water because she refused to go into the ocean due to her fear of sharks and fishes. Mason was lying on a lounge chair with a cap covering his face, he was probably sleeping and would get even more sunburned if he didn't get out of the sun soon.

You rolled your eyes when you saw Lily and Ben fighting over the volleyball game they were taking way too seriously, and she was probably losing and was trying to change the rules to win.

You got up and decided to walk to the house to get a book and continue your reading, and in a few minutes you were ready to go back, but you were surprised to see Mason entering through the front door.

Mason walked towards you and you stopped, and then you realized he came alone.

“Hey, can we talk?” He asked and you raised an eyebrow but nodded, after all, you knew there was a lot to sort out with Mason. 

“Sure, about what?” 

“Us.” You were silent, but eventually you and Mason would put an end to the story and everything would be okay. 

“Where is Louise?” 

“I asked her to leave, I'm not a good guy to her and so she can find someone who will treat her well and be her butler.” You couldn't help but laugh, because Mason suffered at her hands for the two days together.

“You deserved it.” Mason shrugged and put his hands in the pocket of his beach shorts, but he didn't stop smiling anyway. “Mason, I don't know what to say, but I can only apologize. I treated you badly for a long time, I said terrible things to you and never let you explain yourself, I was just angry that you rejected me, I guess.”

You sat on the couch and Mason sat next to you, the two of you staring at the large pool outside.

“I know, and I also want you to forgive me for that, I shouldn't have treated you badly and I was an idiot, I acted like a child and not like a man.” Mason sighed and closed his eyes, and you stared at him, noticing his face was red from the sun. “I'm not that man, I'm the guy you met that night in that hotel, and I didn't lie in anything I said that day.”

“I know the man you are, Mason.” You were honest, and it's true, all the hate made you see Mason as a jerk, but in reality he wasn't like that. Mason is the guy who helps someone whenever he can, he's kind to a child or an old lady, he loves children and everyone loves him.

Mason looked at you and smiled, and you felt a weight lift off your shoulders after that, finally everything was resolved, you wouldn't argue anymore and you could turn this page.

“Friends?” You asked and held out your hand, and Mason stared at your fingers for a few seconds before sighing and nodding. 

“Friends!” You smiled at Mason and stood up, and you stood there for a few seconds staring at each other, embarrassed and not knowing what to do. “Are you waiting for me? I'll get more sunscreen.”

Before Mason could answer, you headed towards the stairs to get the bottle of sunscreen, and you didn't even notice when Mason followed you, you only noticed when you were walking down the hallway and heard his footsteps behind you.

“Actually, Y/N…” You stopped walking and Mason stood in front of you, you were startled when he stood just a few inches away from you. Mason lightly pushed you against the wall. “I can’t be your friend.” Mason grumbled, and you widened your eyes, still leaning against the wall. “Every time I look at you I just think I want to kiss those pretty lips.”

You closed your eyes, knowing Mason was watching you, and each second it felt like he was getting closer and you were getting hotter. 

Because that's the effect Mason has on you.

“Don’t do that, don’t play with me.”

“I would never do that and you know it.” 

Mason pressed his lips against yours lightly and you sighed, trying to resist, but when Mason brought his fingers to your face and pulled, you couldn't do anything else.

Mason's kiss made you remember that night, all the kisses he had spread across your body, his warm hands on your legs and back.

You didn't even imagine how much you wanted a kiss from Mason again, and Mason seemed as desperate as you were, because you could hear his sighs and his desperation as he pressed his body against yours.

“I wanted this so much.” Mason sair and pressed his body against yours, bringing a hand to your face and making you look at him. “And you've been walking around for five days in those little bikinis and driving me crazy.”

“Why did you have to dye your hair blonde?”

“You didn't like it?” He asked, his eyes wide and you laughed, bringing your hand to his chest and lightly running your fingernail over it.

“All I can think is that I want to sit on your face, just like we did the first time.” Mason groaned and ground his hips against you, and you felt him so hard. For months you had wanted to feel Mason again, and you hated yourself for the thought. 

You took your hand off his chest and brought it to the bulge in his swim shorts, squeezing it lightly and feeling Mason twitch. He brought his hand to the middle of your legs, pressing his finger against your clit over your panties and making you sigh. 

“I've had your taste on my tongue for months, and when you've thrown nasty words at me, I just want to suck you off and make you shut up.” He spoke in your ear and this time it was you who moaned, because Mason was so hot and you wanted to have the experience with him once again.

He grabbed your leg and wrapped it around his hip, and Mason pressed himself against you, sending shivers through your body. And you hated that you spent so many months arguing and hating each other when you could have been having sex and kissing, you wanted so, so badly to rub yourself against him just to ease the tension between you.

Mason pressed his hands against the hallway wall and left you trapped between the wall and him, and when he lowered his head to kiss you again, pressed his tongue against yours and left you breathless, you realized that you were crazy for him.

Pulling him in wasn't enough, feeling his whole body warm from the sun against you still wasn't enough, you wanted so much more, and so did Mason. And when Mason and you started walking towards his room, he didn't take his hands off you as he kissed you, and you didn't want to leave either.

Because it was much better to get lost with Mason than alone.

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

You had been staring at the ceiling for a few minutes, and Mason was glued to you, looking at the view from his room. Mason sighed and turned over, laying on his stomach and facing you as he laid his head on the pillow. You blushed and looked at him, and he smiled at you in a way that completely melted you.

“What?” You covered your face when Mason wouldn't stop staring at you, and you were still naked, you were only covered with a thin sheet. And his bed was so much better than the bed you were sharing with Lily.

You were hoping no one would show up and pull you and Mason out of the bubble, you had already left the beach over an hour ago and no one had come home yet.

“You’re so beautiful.” He softly came closer, leaving light kisses on your neck. “And your skin is so soft, I could touch you all day.” Mason spoke and ran his hand down your leg, bringing his fingers to your belly then to your nipples, playing with them and making you shiver. He let out a laugh when he realized what he was doing to you. 

“Stop laughing.” You fought with him, but the smile didn't leave your lips.

“You're so horny, and we fucked four times.” He said and you moved in bed, climbing on top of him, so you brought his arms up to his head, pinning him against the pillow. Mason was with his back to you, so you brought your mouth to his neck, leaving kisses and running your tongue, feeling him shiver too. “Aren't you tired?”

“If you're tired I can go find someone who can handle it.” You teased him, and Mason turned over on the mattress, making you straddle him once more. 

“Oh, sure, because you weren't screaming “oh, Mase, just like that, yeah” fifteen minutes ago.” You laughed and slapped his chest, hearing him laugh at you.

“I wasn't saying that.” 

“Yes, baby, you were.” Mason pulled you and left a kiss on your lips, hugging you and making you lie on top of him. “I can’t believe I’m finally kissing and hugging you, why did it take so long?”

“Because we are two stupid people.” You laid your head on his chest, closing your eyes. 

“What should we do now?” He asked, and then Mason pulled the sheet to cover the two of you. 

“Will you stop pretending you're not in love with me?” You asked and looked at Mason, and he just smiled at you. This pretty smile. 

“I’m leaving Chelsea.” He let the words slip out and your eyes widened, Mason gave you a sad smile and you realized he wasn't lying. 

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not, but I haven't told anyone yet, only my family knows.” Mason's sigh made you realize he wasn't over it, and he looked genuinely shaken about leaving the club he grew up in. 

“Why are you telling me this?” You really didn't understand, because until months ago you and Mason were like two strangers. 

“It just felt right to tell you.” He caressed your back, and you hugged him as best you could.

“I'm so sorry, that must be difficult.” 

“I don't know how to tell the fans, it's going to be horrible, that's why I wanted to travel, just to enjoy it a little before the chaos.” 

“And where are you going?” You started to think about which London team Mason would fit into, not that you knew all of them because you were zero into football.

“I'm going to Manchester United.” You didn't answer anything, you just stared at Mason in silence for a few seconds.

“Wow, it’s far.” 

“I know, and things will probably change completely in my life.” You sat on the bed and leaned your back against the headboard, then Mason moved and laid his head on your legs, closing his eyes as your fingers quickly went to his hair to caress it. “I don't know how to begin to deal with this.”

“You don't have to do this alone, all your friends will support you.”

“Ben and Reece will be disappointed but the fans will be even more so, I just don't think I'm part of Chelsea's plans any more and that's why I've made this decision.”

“I'm so sorry you're going through this, Mason.” You left one more kiss on his lips, and Mason smiled as he enjoyed the feeling of having you kiss him or making him feel loved.

“Hey, there's something that can help me get better.”

“What?”

“You need to put your hand right here…” Mason took your hand and led it to his cock, and you let out a loud laugh when you realized he was being silly. “Doctors recommend it.”

“Yeah? You need to behave for this.” You said, stroking his cock the way he wanted.

Mason stood up and quickly you were underneath him, he left kisses on your neck, on your mouth, on your nipples... Ah, you were on cloud nine.

✦‎۟    ࣭   ⊹

The days passed quickly and before you knew it, it was your last day in Greece with your friends. You and Mason had been making out in the corners for the past few days, or you would go to his room to sleep with him, and of course soon everyone realized that things between you two were resolved.

In the end, you and Mason weren't hiding it anymore, you were together and you didn't care what they thought about it. You got along and worked together, there was no reason to worry.

“I'm going to miss this place.” You told Lily as the two of you were together in the room packing your bags, and it was the last night and you were leaving tomorrow morning, so everything needed to be organized.

You went to a restaurant for dinner, and Mason didn't take his arms off of you the entire night, as if you were going to run away from him, but the truth is you weren't going anywhere else but in his arms.

It was a fun dinner, the boys were looking forward to the next season, and you noticed Mason's look when Ben and Reece were talking about Chelsea's next season, so you just put your hand on his thigh, showing that you were there for him.

You walked slowly home, because you all wanted to enjoy the last moments in that beautiful place. You all sat outside the house, but gradually everyone went inside to sleep until it was just you and Mason.

You and Mason were laying on the soft grass, and the sky was beautiful, full of stars and the moon bright. You were laying on Mason's arm as you drew pictures on his clothes.

“What about us?” He asked quietly, and you knew he had been wanting to talk about this for a while, because Mason seemed to not want to ruin the vacation by talking about the future. “What happened in Greece stays in Greece or can we see what happens next?” 

“Things didn't happen in Greece, they happened in England, nothing fairer than taking it back.”

“I'll be away from London, you know.”

“Hey, it's not like you're going to the other side of the world, Mason. It's Manchester, a few hours by car or train.” You sat down on the grass and looked at Mason. “If we're going to make it work, then everything will be fine, no need to worry.”

“I love how calm you are while I'm freaking out inside.”

“I don't know what will happen in the future, but as long as you want to be with me and I want to be with you, there is no reason to think that things will go wrong. All I want is for things to work out.”

“Yeah, me too.” Mason pulled you in to kiss you and he made you lay down next to him again. “I can't believe we could have been kissing like this for months, why do you have to be so difficult?” 

“Don't talk like you're not difficult too, I suffered with you.”

“You're dramatic. The drama queen.” You laid on top of Mason and he tickled you, making you laugh out loud as you tried to get away from him. 

When Mason finally stopped, you looked at him once more, watching his eyes shine and that gave you relief, everything was fine.

“Everything will be fine, Masey Masey.”

[lutethebodies]

The Misunderstood Blunt Instrument

Two Minthara posts from yesterday (this one about the glorious new wallpapers and this one about her weapons and armor) got me thinking about The Mace as her weapon of choice. If I recall correctly the fandom has touched on bits of it already, so I won't go too long on this (and forgive me if it's been mentioned already), but other than the two cited above my brief searches haven't yielded anything new. And what I got thinking about was how ditching the maces upon recruitment is almost essential.

Personally I never retain them as her melee weapons, for both mechanical and RP reasons. For the first it's because I routinely respec her to a Dex-based build and of course maces are Str-based. The second reason is because (and forgive me if I’m late to the party here) that as a paladin she’s a blunt instrument for whatever deity she’s sworn to: Lolth, the Absolute, etc. And once she’s free of both, she’s free to choose how to defend herself and/or her friends/lovers among the companions.

As noted here, the mace itself may be two fun call-backs in one—both to her EA version as a cleric and, as dual-wielded by an exile, to Drizzt's "draa velve" fighting style (and I'll take their word for it because I may be the only over-40 D&D fan who hasn't read Salvatore's books). But representing this with maces feels specifically like a reductive and more brutish or ugly choice—and the perfect encapsulation for what she's become while enthralled.

The Absolute (and/or the three Chosen) has sanded down all the complexities of Minthara's character into the "mad dog" epithet Ketheric dumps on her during her trial. I'd add (based on much better arguments by much smarter fans) that for the casual BG3 player this is all she is and all she'll ever be, especially (as she notes after Orin's death) that if Tav/Durge had killed her, that would indeed be her fate.

The mace is also a symbol of Minthara's pre-tadpoled hubris of privilege, arrogance, and elitism in that it's the deadweight of how her life up to that point had sculpted her to precisely this outcome. A symbol of her trauma. "How the mighty have fallen" is a cliché, sure, but it's a cliché precisely because it's true and happens so often. The schadenfreude that fellow envious Lolth-sworn might feel when encountering this manic, raving caricature of their own culture! The shock that anyone who knew her from her previous life might feel about how she's changed for the worse! She says as much when candidly later admitting that pride is one of her sins.

The mace is a great choice for an enthralled Minthara, but that makes it (for me) necessary to abandon when she's a companion. The mace helps further that convenient, simplistic, reactive, and reductive way of writing her off as just another male-hating Drow dominatrix. It helps any player confirm lazy priors about her, which might be why she's both blithely dismissed by some and jealously policed by others.

So that's why I always ditch those weapons and re-arm her with Phalar Aluve. It may be just as reductive, but I think it fits, because 1) it's a fab finesse weapon for Dex-based builds, 2) fuck you Lolth, this is a weapon of Eilistraee and Minthara will wield it at you if you come for her and anyone she loves, and 3) fuck you Absolute, she is not your blunt instrument anymore, and she will smite you with something entirely different and with extreme prejudice.