#i have re-written the exact same thing like 8 times rip & no i am not happy with it. beaming it into the universe who wants to plot with me

[crossbackpoke-check]

the work is certainly not in progress, but it is wednesday !!

[bellringermal]

oh jeez, your LND fanfiction sounds amazing every time you talk about it! Will you ever release it to the public, English translated or not?

EDIT: this post became longer than I thought and contains stupid ramblings about gothic literature and me overanalyzing stuff even if nobody asked me about any of this lmao. You’ve been warned.

Thank you :3 I’m pretty proud of that little soap-opera! Has been a while since I spent so much time just dwelling into characters’ personalities and trying to imagine how they changed as time went by. The last time I did something like this was at least 5 years ago with my own original characters.

Sadly, translating it would take me way too much time considering that I just hit 40 pages (add the 150+ pages of my ‘main’ fanfic and you’ll get the picture of how much Gehrmaria and Micorom crap I’ve written XD) but I can consider uploading the Italian one somewhere in the future.

The biggest problem I have with the LND AU rn and why I am hesitant to post it anywhere (aside from the language) is that I’ve lost the 1st chapter when my file got corrupted and I honestly doubt that I’ll ever re-write it. It was a nice introduction imho, taking place 8 years after the massacre of Fishing Hamlet with Patches, now on the run like many other Cainhurst survivors, carrying on his sketchy business in post-industrial revolution Lothric and giving Gehrman precious information in exchange for a conspicuous sum of money. The greedy bastard :P

From there, Gehrman made contact with Greirat (or at least, his Bloodborne-ish counterpart. He’s not supposed to be the same man, just like Patches is not the same as DeS and DS1-3) who’s the counterfeiter who forged Maria’s documents allowing her to safely leave Carim. The story then moves to the small, peaceful village near the border between Vinheim and Astora where Maria fled, a place so different from Yharnam that Gehrman can’t believe his eyes. I just like to imagine how shocked the characters would be to find themselves in places where not everything is trying to kill them lmao.

I mean, it’s super cheesy. It’s a rip off of the worst Phantom of the Opera fanfiction ever written (and performed. I still can’t believe that I saw that thing on stage 3 times. I AM SCARRED FOR LIFE WEBBER!) after all, but I guess that’s why I love Gehrmaria so much in the first place XD

I love Gothic Romance and many of its tropes but I am bored to death by how most of the time it presents female characters. Boring, empty, subservient ladies with no character *cough cough, Christine, cough*. So, let me explain why I find Maria to be a much more engrossing character, but in order to do so, we need to take a look at the old man himself first :P

Gehrman perfectly mets all the ‘requirements’  of the male counterpart in traditional gothic romance:

Is in a position of authority over the female lead. (Owner of the mansion/castle/whatever spooky place the story takes place in, teacher, replacement of a fatherly figure, betrothed the poor girl has never met before and so on)

Is usually older than the heroine and of a different social status.

Deceives the heroine. (this aspect changes from character to character and can range from an elaborate evil plan to kill the heroine just like Mr.Sharpe plans to do in Crimson Peak to Erik hiding his monstrous appearance from Christine or simply hiding an inconvenient secret like Mr.Rochester does in Jane Eyre. Most of the time, is just hiding the fact that they REALLY like the chick because *insert moral reason here*.

Uncertainty of reciprocation / unreturned love.

Elements of manias of various sorts and neuroses. (Ironically enough, these characteristics are found also in positive heroes such as the Byronic ones. In fact, most modern super villains AND superheroes can be considered Byronic heroes, depending on who you ask.)

Is associated with the supernatural, death and the underworld. (it can be through visual clues, the house is described as a tomb, is located underground, the character possess attributes, supernatural or not, that associate them with death. Erik is literally a living corpse, Maxim De Winter is haunted by the ghost of his deceased wife and Dracula is obviously a vampire. I don’t like to include Dracula among the other boys because his character was made an icon of tragic love only in modern media and not in the original book :/. “Eros&Thanatos” and “Death and the Maiden” are really common archetypes.)

etc.. etc…

BUT what I like about this ship is that you can easily turn the tables and say that almost all of the above applies somehow to Maria too. She is in a position of power being a noblewoman from a scary and powerful family of pseudo-vampires with a dark history. She’s not physically inferior in any way and had no reason to take interest in someone like Gehrman unless she wanted to because she saw something admirable in them or because they proved themselves worthy of her attention. Maria is also depicted in canon as someone in possession of traits traditionally associated with gothic heroines such as kindness, mercy and the will to bring solace to those who suffer BUT Gehrman possesses the exact same traits even if he shows them in a different way.

Personally, I love how balanced they are and that’s why I like writing about them so much.

[doctormelapples]

I want every personal

Sorry this took so long

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?

erm, idk but I can list some of my favs? how about “Mr. Know-It-All” by Young The Giant, “Brain Stew” by Green Day, “Swimming Pool” by The Front Bottoms, “Tokyo Narita (Freestyle)” by Halsey and Lido, “Big Jet Plane” by Angus & Julia Stone, and “Doo Wop (That Thing)” by Lauryn Hill

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Do they have to be alive?? How about Beyonce Twin #2

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.

I’m sitting right next to a bookshelf wtf. Okay the first book only had a line 12, Book 2: “…glittering sceptres. These shones so brightly September had to shade her..”

4: What do you think about most?

I see photo opprotunities when I walk? like if I’m walking past a house I see the exact angle that I would take a picture of it with and what the frame and coloring would turn out to be? does that count?

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?

Text or sc?? cuz idk on either tbh sc:goals text:theenks

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?

Clothes

7: What’s your strangest talent?

I have none, so like,,

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)

Girls are beautiful, Boys are beautiful, and so is everyone else

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?

lol no

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?

like yesterday probs

11: Do you have any strange phobias?

Strange? idk

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?

When I was a child,,, marble

13: What’s your religion?

who’s that

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?

being sad or taking pictures

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

behind absolutely

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?

jesus christ

17: What was the last lie you told?

I have a headache

18: Do you believe in karma?

sort of, like maybe not the textbook definition but I do think that you get what you give to some extent

19: What does your URL mean?

listen,,, okay Doctor is because i like doctor who and melapples is a dan and phil reference, okay, i made it when i joined tumblr, I was young and unknowing, okay

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?

weakness: I’m too emotionally soft; strength: whom’st’d’ve

21: Who is your celebrity crush?

Does phil count, phil counts? It’s Phil

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?

almost

23: How do you vent your anger?

ahah, to the world and through tears tbh

24: Do you have a collection of anything?

I used to collect izze + snapple tops, then got bored

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

video chatting, I like seeing facial expressions

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?

whom?

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?

It took me FOREVER to think of a sound I hate, and like i had sounds i love when my fingers hit the keys. sound I hate: Fork schreeching on a plate; sound I love: laughs, soft sounds of fingers on skin, leaves crunching as you wak in autumn, or snow in the winter, wind, papers fluttering

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?

What if I had stayed at my old school

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

well not really, but aliens absolutely, like, there is no way the universe is so fucking big, and there isn’t life outside of earth

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.

My window frame; a notebook

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?

somebody is making pasta downstairs

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?

what kind of worst? cuz like I believe that no matter where you go you can always get something out of it. Let’s go with my racist ass school

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?

EAST

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?

idk harry styles?

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?

42?

how about: to know, be, see, and do what you want

36: Define Art.

Life

37: Do you believe in luck?

kinda like the same way I belive in karma

38: What’s the weather like right now?

It’s been rainy all day and we just had a rainbow. It’s cleared up now

39: What time is it?

1:23:09 AM

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?

no

41: What was the last book you read?

A graphic novel called March about John Lewis

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?

yeah actually

43: Do you have any nicknames?

lila bean

44: What was the last film you saw?

Wonder Woman pretty sure

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?

all of the skin on my leg was scraped off once so

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?

I’ve had a beautiful butterfly land on me during a meditation session once

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?

strawberry milkshakes

48: What’s your sexual orientation?

I’m pan bro

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?

yes rip how fun

50: Do you believe in magic?

in my hopes and dreams

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?

no, I’m really bad at holding longterm grudges but you better fucking run for at least two weeks if u piss me off

52: What is your astrological sign?

scoooorrrrrppppiiiiooooo

53: Do you save money or spend it?

i save money highkey short term and mass spend it

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?

A swimsuit. oh shit no wait strawberry syrup for milkshakes

55: Love or lust?

lust

56: In a relationship?

damn i wish

57: How many relationships have you had?

3

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?

nope

59: Where were you yesterday?

crying in bed all day tbh

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?

my comforter that I’m sitting on lowkey has pink flowers on it

61: Are you wearing socks right now?

listen,,, fuck socks okay no

62: What’s your favourite animal?

cats homie

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?

laugh at their jokes + be a pleasant person

64: Where is your best friend?

idk probably sleeping somewhere tbh

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.

i don’t pay enough attention soz

66: What is your heritage?

like,,? My dad is from finland probably but otherwise i have no idea, all my family tree has is slavery so

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?

fuck dude crying

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?

smith

69: Be honest. Ever gotten yourself off?

hell yes

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?

idk i hope so

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

i like can’t really swim that well so like probably get the attention of someone who can and get the dog saved then go to work. but fuck that job tho

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

nah bro, i would try and accomplish everything i wanted, travel, be happy with family, and make friends happy, not afraid

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.

trust

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?

bills by lunchmoney lewis

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?

or not?

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?

trust, communication, known goals

77: How can I win your heart?

idk bro its pretty easy out here a-fucking-pparently

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?

yeah for sure

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?

Join theatre

80: What size shoes do you wear?

9.5 or 10

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?

rip in pieces

82: What is your favourite word?

antidisestablishmentarianism

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

the image of the organ tbh

84: What is a saying you say a lot?

lit, tbh, rip, wild

85: What’s the last song you listened to?

star by brockhampton

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?

pink rn, it was just green, i fluctuate

87: What is your current desktop picture?

a picture i took of a car mirror in a violet sunset

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?

trump probs but only if he is right next to pence that bitch will not be president

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

why are you sad

90: One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?

FUCKING RUN DUDE CLIMB OUT THE FUCKING WINDOW FUCK THAT SHIT NO GET OUTTA MY FACE FUCK

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?

elements my dude. if I had to pick which one it would be wind probs

92: You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?

The half-hour where I thought I fell in love with someone before they broke up w me a week later

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

no

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?

RIHANNA

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

Prague 

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?

probably, but not that i know of

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?

omg yes don’t remind me

98: Ever been on a plane?

yups a few times

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?

damn y y’all listening to me?

probs something like “jesus christ just shut up and listen to each other speak without jumping to fucking conclusions and preconceived notions of what other people are like kay?”