#i have plans tomorrow so I’m gonna try be good & also there is a drink limit

[dbnightingale24]

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A Stepceat Love Story about Jim

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Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4,Chapter 5

It took forever, but I finally have this part the way I like it! Thank you for your support, and thank you to everyone who checked in on me. It means so much to me! I hope it was the wait!

Word Count: 5,994

Warning(s): Swearing (MINORS DNI), Fluff, Drinking, Emotional Cheating, Forbidden Love, Crying, Family Drama, Sneaking Around, Stepcest, Step-Daughter/Step-Father, Angst...I think that's it?

Summary: You're officially done trying with your Mother. You've done everything in your power to make things right with her, but after the Christmas dinner you just had, you know none of it will ever be good enough. You'll never be good enough. Accepting this new reality also means that you need to come to a decision about Jim once and for all.

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I do not give permission/consent for my works/stories to be posted elsewhere. I do not condone this type of relationship, this is clearly for entertainment purposes only.

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Chapter 6

“Angel?” you faintly hear Jim’s voice call as he approaches you on the swing. 

You’re not sure how long you’ve been at the park and, thanks to the whiskey, you can’t tell how cold you actually are. 

A small silver lining on the shittiest day you’ve in a while.

“Go away,” you squeak out with a sniffle, using the back of your hand to wipe your nose.

“Angel-”

“Don’t Jim. Don’t comfort me-”

“She was wrong. Ciara almost lunged across the table after you left, and your Mother and I got into a huge yelling match in the bedroom. She knows that both she and Rose were out of line.”

“I just wanna leave,” you sob with a slight slur.

“Angel,” he sighs, crouching down in front of you and cupping your face in his hands, “I’m so fuckin’ sorry.”

“I didn’t even wanna come!”

“I know, Angel. I know. Lets just go back-”

“No, I never want to see her again. I know what we did was fucked up, but she doesn’t even know about that! That’s just how she feels about me! How she’ll always feel about me! That’s just how she fuckin’ feels, and I...I have no choice but to accept that.”

“She’s drunk-”

“She’s always drunk, always angry with me, always blaming me, and I’m fucking tired of it. I’m tired of her!”

“You can’t stay out here all night, it’s too damn cold-”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Where do ya want to go?” he sighs, getting up and sitting on the swing next to you, taking the bottle from you and taking a drink from it.

“You have to get back-”

“Danielle took the kids with her, along with the gifts ya got ‘em. Ciara and Darragh took Nora home, because Ciara was too furious to think straight. I told your Mother I wasn’t coming back tonight during our argument-”

“Jim-”

“Rose is gonna stay with her, Angel. Whatever you want to do, I’ll do.”

“I just want to be with you, Jim. We don’t have to do anything, I just want to be with you-ya clothes!”

“It’s fine, Angel. I know everywhere is booked, but I know I’ll be able to find us somethin’.”

“What about-”

“Just let me take care of ya, Angel.”

He always makes it all seem so easy. He always seems to have a plan and he’s so damn calm. No matter what happens, he’s always so calm, and maybe that’s part of the reason you’re so tethered to him. 

After a few more swigs from the bottle, and a couple of phone calls, Jim is able to find you both a room for the next few nights. 

“Don’t you have to go back-”

“No,” he answers confidently as he stands up and holds out his hand. “Lets get your clothes from Ciara.”

“What about your-”

“I can get em tomorrow. C’mon, Angel.”

“Jim-”

“I promise to get em tomorrow. Now, lets go,” he smiles softly towards you.

You take his hand and as you stand up, you realize just how stiff you are.

“How much was the room?” you as you two slowly make your way to his car. 

“It’s a gift.”

“Jim-”

“I’m not tellin’ ya, so drop it,” he chuckles softly, opening the door for you.

“I feel bad-”

“Stop feelin’ bad for the mistakes she makes. You didn’t even want to come and, truth be told, I was gonna bring the kids to see ya at school,” he smirks before closing the door.

WHAT?!

“Jim, what do ya mean-”

“They’ve missed you,” he shrugs as he gets into the car, closing the door and starting the engine. “I almost suggested that we take them to see you a few times, but I knew it’d make you unhappy.”

“Jim-”

“I keep tellin’ you I want this, Angel. Yes, the sex is phenomenal,” he laughs softly as you giggle, “but there’s so much more to us than that. I’m not confused or angry, or any of that shite. I love you, Y/N. I’m in love with you. You’re the first thought I have in the morning, and the last one I have at night. I’ve missed watching movies with you, eating dinner with you, cuddling up and talking about nothing...this isn’t just physical for me, Angel. I have a lot to consider with us perusing this, and I don’t think you understand that. I have to deal with the possibility of my children hating me, your Mother berating me, Rose being...Rose, and I can only imagine what Danielle will do and I can’t blame her. Still, with knowing all of that, I still came after you tonight. I’ve been trying to get you to see that since we started this.”

“I just don’t see why ya’d want me,” you mumble before taking a drink from your bottle. 

Yes, you know you shouldn’t be drinking in the car while he’s driving, but you’ve had a nightmare of a day.

“None of the things your Mother says about ya are true. How can I not love ya? Not want ya? Angel, I’m amazed that you want anythin’ to do with me,” he scoffs as he pulls up to Ciara’s place. “I love you for all the reasons I’ve already told ya, and a million more that I’m just not ready to tell ya,” he promises as he kills the engine and looks over at you. “Lets get ya things.”

The second Ciara opens the door, she engulfs you in a hug and is apologizing profusely.

“You were just tryin’ to protect me,” you sigh as you and Jim make your way inside, “and I love ya.”

“Ya drunk,” she sighs, once she notices you stumbling a little.

“Only a little, besides, I’m not stayin’ here tonight-”

“You know you’re always welcome to-”

“I know, I know,” you quickly clarify, “but I don’t want Nora seeing me like this, and Jim got us a room for a few nights, so I’ll be there. I’ll come by before I go back,” you smile weakly.

“I’m so sorry, I really-”

“Ci, you didn’t do anything wrong. It was a dumb idea to begin with,” you sigh as you wipe away a lone tear falling down her face with your thumb. “Let me get my stuff.”

It’s not like you brought a lot to begin with, but you still pack your things with a heavy heart. It’s not like you’d expected the trip be amazing by any means, but you’d hoped for more than...this. You’d expected your Mother to be shit faced, but you really had done your best to keep her happy. You stayed out of the way, avoided Jim, made dinner, kept the children happy and entertained, and even played nice with Jim’s ex-wife even when she showed her claws. All of that work, and for what? You to end up alone in a park, drunk, and your...situationship to rescue you.

Happy fuckin’ Christmas.

“I don’t have my charger,” you sigh once you’re back downstairs with your one duffle bag packed.

You really hadn’t packed much.

“Do ya need it tonight, Angel?” Jim asks, taking your bag from you.

“She’s gonna-”

“Fuckin’ let her call and call!” Ciara snaps. “She deserves to feel like shit.” “Ci-”

“No Y/N. Do not try and protect her. She should feel horrible. Besides, you know that Rose is only over there encouraging her bad behavior. Your Mother never defends you, so why should you defend her?”

She has a valid point.

“I’ll let you know when we’re at the place,” you promise, wrapping her in a tight hug.

“Y/N, do not try and-”

“I promise I won’t.”

“I love you.”

“And I love you.”

The both of you exchange gifts before you and Jim finally leave, and you somehow feel more defeated than you did before.

“What are you thinkin’, Angel?” he asks after a few minutes.

“Just tryin’ to figure out when she really started to hate me,” you chuckle humorlessly. “When did I really start to ruin her life?”

“Angel-”

“Cause it wasn’t always this bad. Sure, she’s never shown up all that much, but we could at least have fun together. We could skate, watch movies, have dance parties...we had some sort of a relationship, but now? Now, it’s all gone to Hell.”

“Angel, we’ll focus on that tomorrow. Lets just try and salvage the rest of this Christmas.”

“I ruined it for-”

“She ruined it,” he sighs, parking the car.

“Where are we?”

“A friend of mine manages this place. He was able to give us a discounted price on a room for a few nights.”

“Does he know about...us?”

“Yes.”

You groan as you put your head in your hands, “Jim!”

“Ciara knows!”

“That’s different!”

“How so?”

“She’s known my Mum for as long as she’s known me. She knows how terrible she is, how terrible she’s always been, and is very understanding of this whole...us. Your friend doesn’t know me from a can of fuckin’ paint,” you mutter, hating how much you feel like a child. 

“You’re right, he doesn’t know you, but he knows about the situation between your Mother and I. It’s fine, Angel.” “Jim-”

“I’d never bring ya somewhere where ya not safe. Lets get inside,” he smiles softly. 

You slowly get out while Jim grabs your bag out of the backseat. As your eyes trail over the building, you can’t help but wonder-

“No, this is not where Yvonne and I would go when we had our affair,” he sighs heavily, walking ahead of you, and you slowly follow after.

Now you feel like an even bigger asshole. 

“Hey, can we speak with Charlie, please?” he kindly asks the man behind the desk. 

“I’ll get ‘im for ya,” the young man smiles before disappearing behind the door.

“Jim, I’m-”

“It’s fine, Angel. We’ll talk in the room, okay?”

“I can stay with Ciara-”

“Angel, please just let me take care of you. I love you, I want to be here with you, and I want to do this. It’s all going to be fine, so please don’t worry.”

“I love you too, Jim,” you mumble, looking down at your feet. 

Today is making you feel so incredibly small and you hate it. 

“Thought you’d be here much earlier,” a man you’re assuming is Charlie laughs as he greets Jim.

“Had to get a few things together, but we’re here now.”

“One bag?”

“I’ll pick up some of my things tomorrow.”

“Really goin’ through with it this time, eh?”

“After tonight? Yeah, long overdue,” Jim scoffs, shaking his head as the man hands him a room key. 

“I’ll get ya when ya leave.”

“You sure?”

“You’ve got enough to think on, just leave it. Is this the little lady?” Charlie asks, smiling at you.

“She’s a little somethin’,” Jim laughs and you roll your eyes. “Y/N, this is Charlie. Charlie, this is Y/N.”

“It’s nice to know ya,” you offer with a small smile shaking his hand. 

“Well, I’ve got food and a few bottles waitin’ up there for ya. Try to enjoy the rest of your night. We’ll talk in the mornin,” he nods towards Jim, who just nods in response, taking the key and heading towards the elevator.

God knows what that means.

“Angel, just be here for now,” he encourages as you two take the ride up.

“You’re doin’ all of this and I’m just-”

“Y/N, please stop. I love ya. I love ya so much, and I’m happy.”

“Jim-”

“I’m so happy to be here with you, and it’s not like I pictured it at all, but I’m still with you.”

“Jim...today has been such a mess and, if we stay together, they’re gonna be a lot more days like this before they get better.” 

“I know that. This isn’t like before for me. I know what’s waiting for me when we go through with this. I’m goin’ to be looked at as the dirty old man who seduced you, and ruined your relationship with ya Mum. I know Danielle is goin’ to be disgusted with me, and she’s gonna have an issue with the kids stayin’ with me. Rose is gonna raise hell and convince your Mother to do the same...I know what’s waiting for me,” he sighs as he opens the door to the room. 

“Jim...” you gasp as you marvel at it.

“I didn’t tell him to do this much,” he laughs, walking in behind you and closing the door, “I just told him I want somethin’ nice for ya.”

“This is...oh Jim,” you smile at him as your eyes start to water. 

Jim honestly could have gotten the two of you a rat hole, and you would’ve thanked him endlessly, but this? The room was gorgeous. Beautiful shades, a spacious bed, bottles of your favorite wine and champagne, food (which you’re more than thankful for because you’re ravenous), a gorgeous bathroom, and a small living area.

“Let me help you pay-”

“No,” he laughs, tossing your bag down. “Let me do this.”

“Jim-”

“I love you,” he whispers, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you close.

“I love you.”

“So lets enjoy this, yeah?”

“Bathe with me.”

“Angel-”

“No tricks, no sex. I just wanna be with you a bit,” you promise, slowly breaking out of his hold and taking your shirt off. “I’ll get the water ready,” you call over your shoulder, grabbing the half finished bottle of whiskey, an unopened bottle of wine, and two glasses along with a wine opener, before making your way into the bathroom.

No, you shouldn’t mix alcohol, or be drinking anymore for that matter, but you’ve earned this. 

You’re quick to shed the rest of your clothes, grabbing your phone from the pocket of your jeans and scoffing when you see that your Mother has called 40 times and has sent 20 texts, then finally start the water. You’re well aware that between the two of you, you like your water hotter than Jim does. However, thinking back on how the whole day went, you know you both can use a bit a warmth to shield you from the cold of life awaiting you.

“I expected you to find you texting your Mother back,” Jim laughs, making his way into the bathroom in just his boxer briefs.

“I am tempted to, but I just want us to enjoy whats left of the day. There’s not much left anyway,” you shrug, turning to face him as he steps out of his boxer briefs. “You get in first, I wanna lay against ya.’

“How bad am I about to get burned?”

“I’m playing nice tonight,” you giggle, pouring the both of you a drink.

He’s slow to stand in it, but the second hes completely seated, he lets out a sigh of content, and looks up at you with the most loving look in his eyes. You hand him his drink before carefully stepping in. Once you’re settled comfortably between his legs, you lean against him and close your eyes as he wraps his arms around you tight.

You’re home.

You sit in a comfortable silence for a few minutes before asking, “Jim?”

“Yeah, Angel?”

“I love you.”

He presses a soft kiss to the top of your head and strokes your arm softly, “I love ya too.”

“What did you mean earlier?”

“Hmm? When?” 

“When you said they’re a million reasons you love me, but you’re not ready to tell me.”

He lets out a heavy sigh before taking a sip of his drink, “ya keep runnin’ from me, Angel.”

You didn’t think it was possible for you to feel any worse, but you stand corrected.

“And I understand,” Jim quickly adds, trying to lessen the pain from the blow he just landed on you. “I’d be a fool if I didn’t, but I’m not gonna lie to ya.”

“Jim...it’s just hard-”

“You have your reservations and rightfully so. I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t hurt, but I know how this looks from your point of view. I cheated before, married your Mum, and now I’m cheating on her with you. Her daughter. I know how much of a scum bag I look like right now.”

“Ya told me about the cheatin, though,” you sigh, grabbing your own glass off the floor, and taking a drink from it.

“I can understand why it doesn’t mean anythin’ to you.”

“I don’t want to hurt ya, Jim-”

“I know you don’t, Angel. That’s why I don’t get angry or frustrated. This is a lot and I know it’s nothing either of us ever imagined. All of this is complicated, and it’s worse for you. If you really decide you don’t want this, then I’ll walk away. Either way, I’ll be divorcing your Mother and you’ll never hear from or see me again.”

“I don’t want that.”

“But I can understand if that’s what ya decide.”

“How are ya so sure, Jim? Why are you so confident?”

“When I cheated on Danielle...that was me being stupid. Yes, a large part of me had feelings for Yvonne, I thought she was pretty, but it wasn’t love. It was so exciting at the time, that I told myself it was love and made excuses for my actions, but I knew better. That’s why it was so easy for me to turn the idea of trying again with her down when she brought it up. After everything settled and I could think clearly again, I knew it was just a moment. It wouldn’t have lasted. That’s probably why I rushed to be with Orla. God, what a fuckin’ nightmare that was,” he mutters, before taking another sip of drink.

You start making little circles on his chest with your index finger, “what went wrong there?”

“You’re gonna think so much less of me,” he groans and you giggle softly. “I could never.”

“The first time I met Orla, she was a mess. Swearin’ in front of my kids, short tempered, combative, and I later found out that she drinks a bit much, which is a lot comin’ from me. That’s why I fell in love with your Mother, or, at least thought I fell in love with your Mother. At the time, she was the exact opposite. No, I didn’t feel as strongly for her as I do for you, and maybe all it was, was a sense of relief. She didn’t drink as much, she wasn’t so short with me, she didn’t assume that I was always out cheating...it felt like it used to with Yvonne. Then...”

“Then I came home,” you scoff.

“You came home.”

“What do you feel for me now that makes all of those times different?”

“None of it is gonna make any sense,” he chuckles, pulling you closer to him. “I just felt it when I first saw you in person. I had seen pictures of you and thought you were beautiful, but seeing you in person...I really wish I knew how to explain it. I just felt this...”

“Connection?”

“You felt it too?”

You hang your head and sigh in defeat, “yeah, I did.”

“Angel, I need you to understand that I didn’t intend for any of this to happen. I honestly did my best to try and stop this, but you...you are everything. This isn’t about the chase, this isn’t for my fuckin’ ego, and I won’t be someone else to hurt and let ya down.”

“Jim...it’s gonna be so bad.”

“I’ll face all of it with you, Angel.”

You turn a little in his hold and look up at him. You can tell that he means every words, but that he’s just as terrified as you are. Not that he’ll fuck it up, but that you’ll go running for the hills again. You reach up and cup the right side of his face into your hand and closes his eyes and leans into it.

You’re both so tired of fighting and running from what you both truly want.

“I love you, Jim.”

He dips down and kisses you passionately, “I love you so much, Angel,” he breathes once you two break apart. 

“Can we stay in here just a bit longer?” you question with a small smile as tears come to your eyes.

“We can do whatever ya want, Angel.”

You resume the position you were in before and lay your head on his chest, as he plays with the ends of your hair that are in the water. Why can’t it always be this easy?

“Have you always had Charlie’s support about us?”

“Fuck no,” he laughs softly and you giggle a little. “He asked me if I was out of my fuckin’ mind, and told me that I can’t be with you.”

“You told him-”

“After the first night I met you. I met up with him at that pub round the way and told him that I fucked up.”

“Were you and my Mother having issues before I came back?”

“Honestly? No, not really. We had little arguments here and there, but nothin’ to make me think there was a completely different side to her. After the first night, he convinced me that I was just angry and I’d get over it, and I tried to get myself to believe he was right.”

“What changed his mind?”

“At first, it was that every damn thing that came out of my mouth was about you,” he chuckles sheepishly, moving some of your hair off of your shoulder and kissing it. “No matter what we were talkin’ about, I always found a way to bring it back to you. Then, when I’d come ‘round with ya Mum, he could see the difference in the way I looked at her. The way I touched her. He saw me at her birthday party, and saw that I was constantly lookin’ around for ya. The way I smiled when my eyes finally found you...he could see it was much more than physical. He saw your Mum gettin’ worse, and the way you were always there, even when ya weren’t. When I told him that we...he wasn’t the least bit surprised. I guess anyone who knew what was goin’ on with us wasn’t. I could tell that he wanted to be angry with me, but he understood. He hated that he did, but he did nonetheless.”

“What does he know about me?”

“What doesn’t he know about ya? He knows that you’re in ya final year, he knows what you’re studyin’, he knows your favorite food, your favorite movies, he knows what my favorite things about you are, he knows that you’re scared...I tell him everything,” he shrugs, placing another soft kiss on your shoulder.

“When did you meet him?”

“His ex is best friends with Orla. We both broke up with them around the same time, and we just started hanging out. He’s a good one.”

“Can I ask-”

“I never cheated on Orla,” he sighs and it breaks your heart.

“Don’t get mad-”

“I’m not, Angel. I expect the questions. I just feel horrible that you feel like you need to ask.”

“I just-”

“I know.”

“I do believe ya, Jim. I believe that you love me and want this just as much as I do. I just...” “You’re scared, and you’d be a fool if ya weren’t. This isn’t gunna make things perfect overnight just because we want them to. I know I have to show you, and I know it’s gonna take time, and that’s fine with me.”

“I just know-”

“Angel-”

“Just let me get this out, please,” you sniffle softly. “I know ‘ve said some things that weren’t the nicest in an attempt to keep ya away. I want you to know that I’ve always loved ya, I was just tryin’ to do what was best. What I thought was best. I just want you to be happy, and I know you want the same for me. I know it’s gonna take some time and it’ll be tough, but I truly do want this. I’m all in,” you promise softly.

This time, he’s the one cupping your face and forcing your attention to him.

“Angel, don’t say it if you don’t mean it.”

“You know me well enough to know better. ‘m not gonna say somethin’ to make you feel better. If I’m sayin’ it, I mean it.”

“Say it again.”

“I’m all in.”

“I need to hear it one more time, Angel. Only say it if you’re sure.”

You take a deep breath as you turn in his hold and face him on your hands and knees.

“I’m all in.”

You laugh as he kisses you, pushing you back a little as water splashes around, and you kiss him back just as enthusiastically as you finally feel peace for the first time in a long time.

“I want to give you one of your gifts tonight,” he breathes once you two break apart.

“One? Jim-”

“One tonight, one tomorrow, and one when you’re back in school.”

“Jim-”

“I’ve already bought them, so you may as well let me do it,” he laughs as you shake your head.

“Jim?” you call softly once his laughter subsides.

“Yeah, Angel?”

“Say it for me, please?”

He smiles as his thumb caresses your cheek, “I love you.”

Yes, his smile is reaching his eyes, but you still see a bit of trepidation in them.

“What’s wrong, Jim?”

“Nothin’, lets just-”

“We’re not startin’ off like this. What’s wrong?”

“It’s dumb and it doesn’t-”

“Jim, it’s not dumb to me and it matters to me. What’s wrong?”

He sighs and leans back a little, “it really doesn’t matter.”

“Jim.”

“Remember when you rang your Mum...two months ago? She was askin’ about school and boys?”

You already know where this is headed.

You sit back down as you mutter, “yeah.”

“Did ya really-”

“It was only two dates and it didn’t go any farther than makin’ out. I felt so guilty the entire time, but I was tryin’ to get over you. It was wrong and, while ya still married to my Mum, it’s still wrong.”

“I’m changing that once you’re back at school. You don’t need to be here for that.”

“Jim, tell me that ya aren’t mad.”

“I’m not, Angel. I promise. I know why and I understand, it just...”

“It just...?”

“It irritates me because I don’t want you with anyone else but me. It scares me because maybe you’ll realize you don’t actually want this.”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“It’s not lost on either of us that I’m the older one. Maybe you’ll realize you actually do want someone younger-”

“Jim, no. That’s not...no. I love you. I’m in love with you. Those dates only happened because I was tryin’ to get over ya, and....maybe get a reaction out of you.”

“A reaction?” he scoffs, sitting up and taking a sip of his drink.

“I know I kept tellin’ ya to stay away, and maybe it was just because I wanted to feel like I was a good daughter after everything that happened over the Summer. I think it’s clear that, that’s not what I wanted at all, and in the back of my mind...I was jealous. She had you and I didn’t. Yes, that was my doing, but it didn’t change the fact that I hated that she had you and I didn’t. I wanted to see if you’d react. How you’d react. I wanted you to show up and tell me that I’m yours or...somethin’,” you scoff sheepishly. “It was childish and dumb, but it’s the truth.”

“You really are somethin’ else,” he laughs, shaking his head and you smile sheepishly. “Lets get out of here.”

You lean forward and pull him close, wrap your arms around his neck, and kiss him passionately. It’s not sexual and it’s not teasing. You just want him to feel that you truly do love him as much as he loves you, and you’re in this for the long haul.

You want him to feel and know that you’ll never need or want anything or anyone else ever again.

When you two break apart, he’s smiling wide and you giggle softly. Once you’re both out, you drain the tub and Jim wraps you in a towel, holding your waist tight.

“I promise, it’s all going to be okay, Angel,” he whispers in your ear before kissing the shell of it.

It’s so hard to be afraid of anything when you’re with him.

“C’mon, I’ anxious to give ya your gift,” you giggle before squealing as he kisses your sweet spot.

Soon enough, he’s back in his boxer briefs and you’re in a pair of panties and an old Bangles t-shirt.

“Alright,” you start, reaching into your bag. “Don’t scold me.”

“What did ya do?”

“You need it.”

“Angel-”

“It’s fine,” you promise, handing him a neatly wrapped box and a card.

“You need to focus on yourself.”

“I’m fine,” you laugh. “Open them!”

“I’m openin’ the card first,” he smirks, and you roll your eyes as you finish off your drink, pouring yourself another glass. “Jim, I’m hoping you’re reading this after everyone’s gone to sleep. Also, burn this letter after reading,” he laughs, giving you a quick wink. “I know that this...relationship (I guess) between us hasn’t been anywhere close to ideal, but I want you to know...I want you to know that I truly do love you,” he reads a bit softer, clearing his throat. “It’s never goin’ to be ideal for us, and I’ve accepted that, but I don’t want you to think I hate or resent you, or any of the time we’ve spent together, because being with you is the happiest I’ve ever been. I don’t regret a second of it and my heart is always with you. No matter what happens...my heart will always be with you and it will always be yours. I love you, Jim. I am so in love with you, and I hope you never forget that. Anyway, I hope you enjoy your gift. Before you try and argue with me, the one you have now is a piece of shite and you’re too stubborn to buy yourself a new one. Happy Christmas and I love you. Yours, always; Angel,” he finishes with a sniffle.  “You are so fuckin’ precious, ya know that?” he laughs, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. “I love you, Angel, and I’m not gonna burn this letter,” he laughs as he reaches for the box.

You sit back, crossing your legs as he rips up the paper like a child.

“Angel...”

“You need it!”

“You have so much to save for-”

“Stop it, Jim. I’m happy to do it for you.”

“I’ll pay ya-”

“That’s not how gifts work,” you laugh.

“Angel-”

“I saved up for it. Just take it.”

“I love it, thank you,” he smiles and you laugh as he tackles you with a hug.

You hadn’t initially meant to buy him a Mac Book Pro, it just kind of happened. The first few nights you were at your Mother’s, you’d heard him silently gripping about it. A few days after that, you just decided you’d start saving for the damn laptop. You honestly hadn’t meant to, it just happened. You liked him, you could tell he’d never buy it for himself, and you knew your Mother hadn’t even thought to. The more you got to know him, the more you liked him. By the time you two started fooling around, the money was more than half way saved.

You told yourself that this would be the last thing you ever gave him, and that seems to have been a complete lie. 

“How are even making money?” he laughs, looking over the box.

“I write papers for other students, I write little stories here and there, dog sit-”

“You should be spendin’ that money on yourself.”

“Jim, I was happy to do it and I love you. Enjoy ya gift,” you smile. 

He cups your face again, capturing you in a soul stealing kiss, before grabbing a small box and handing it to you, “I love you.”

“Jim-”

“If you’re allowed to give me this, I’m allowed to give this.”

“Jim...”

“Just open it, Angel.”

You timidly take the box, but you’re quick to rip off the wrapping paper.

“Jim...”

“It’s not gonna bite ya,” he laughs, eyeing you with small hints of amusement in his eyes.

“Did ya spend too much?” “Nothin’ is too much for you. Now, no more questions, open it.”

“Jim-”

“Open,” he laughs.

Slowly, you open the small velvet box, and gasp at what’s inside. Two bracelets that have your favorite charms on them. You’d been eyeing them a few months ago, but decided against getting them because you wanted to make sure you had enough for everyone’s gifts.

“Jim!”

“Read the inside.”

You cocked an eyebrow holding them up and reading the inscription.

‘Mar sin, más rud é, a stór, is cosúil go mbeidh uaireanta Sean droichid ag briseadh idir tú féin agus mise’ the first one reads.

‘Ná eagla. B’fhéidir go ligfimid na scafaill ag titim muiníneach go bhfuil ár balla tógtha againn’ finishes the second.

“You are so...I love them so much,” you sniffle, tackling him with the biggest hug.

“Top marks if you can guess the poet,” he chuckles, pulling you into his lap before hugging you back just as tight.

“Seamus Heaney,” you giggle as you try and reign in your emotions. “The poem is ‘Scaffolding’.”

“Looks like school is paying off,” he teases.

“I love you so much, Jim.”

“I love you too, Angel. No matter what.”

“I really want this to work, Jim. I don’t want this to end. I don’t was us to end.”

“We won’t. It’s not gonna be easy, but we can do this.”

“Promise me.”

He presses a soft kiss to your head as his hold on you tightens, “I promise.”

You two stay like that for a while, and you honestly can’t remember the last time you felt this safe and happy. You can’t remember the last time you felt this loved.

This is probably the best Christmas you’ve ever had. Setbacks and all. 

“What are my other gifts?” you joke with a sniffle, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand.

“I told you when you’ll get them.”

“Why not tonight?”

“Because you need to learn patience,” he teases. “Do you wanna watch a movie?”

“I don’t care what we do, as long as you’re here,” you mumble, putting on your bracelets and settling under the sheets. 

“You need to eat.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Love.”

“I’m not.”

“You’ve had water, a few bites of potatoes, and too much whiskey. You need food,” he reaffirms as he makes you a small plate of food.

“Jim-”

“Eat,” he tells you as he hands you a plate of many different things.

All of which are your favorite. “You take such good care of me,” you tease, taking the plate from him.

“I plan on doin’ it forever.”

“That’s awfully long time.”

“Not long enough if you ask me, Angel,” he smiles towards you softly. “I love ya.”

“I love you too, Jim. Always will.”

As you both settle in and find a movie to watch, Jim pulls you close and you feel as if you’re finally home. Yes, the road ahead is going to be scary and bumpy, but you know that as long as you have Jim, it’s all going to be okay. However, you don’t want to think about any of that right now. Hell is headed both your ways, and you just want a little calm before the storm.

You just wanna live in this moment you’ve been dreaming of.

~~

[zeuxox]

work party tonight & I love how every comms is like ‘REMEMBER ITS A WORK PARTY’ because you just know everyone is gonna be messy as fuck & off their shit.

[kooktrash]

his special secret II | kim taehyung

summary: getting into a relationship with your professor was never in your agenda. you knew it was wrong on some level but it was hard to think of that when he made you feel so good. now it’s been some time since you got together and the secrets are slowly unraveling but who says it’s all bad?

➢ genre/au: college art professor!tae x art student!y/n [she/her… afab] [age gap 9 years]

➢ 13.5k words

warnings: smüt. secret relationship. tae is 30, y/n is 21. oral [f]. make out. groping. tae is divorced. both got cheated on in past. jealous tae. dirty talk. makeout in art closet. y/n is confident but going thru it. professor x student. missionary. tae’s ex finds out and she’s a bitch. y/n is kinda closed off but works on opening up to him. tae thinks everything y/n does is cute. changed it so Namjoon is the ex. fluff ending

THIS IS THE FINAL PART. read part one

You felt utterly ridiculous. You know you agreed to dress as a bunny tonight but clearly you didn’t think things through.

One, it’s kind of cold. You’re at a house party but with everyone going in and out, windows open, ie, you’re cold. The costume was an extremely vague definition of a bunny costume. You were dressed in mostly black, a simple black mini skirt with faux black fur on the hem, a black top, back bunny ears and tail. You even had gloves that turned to mittens if you flipped them up and it made them look like paws. You just weren’t dressed warmly.

Two, you’ve been hit on a lot more than usual. It’s probably the fact that everyone’s drunk at this point and you’re wearing very little clothes. Usually you would play along, never giving in, but you know… playing nice. If the conversation went well then you would get more involved but tonight you couldn’t do that. No, you won’t do that. You and Taehyung… you’re dating but also not? It’s a very tricky situation yet it also made perfect sense. It’s lowkey, the lowest of lows but that didn’t mean you could flirt with people right? That’s why you’re slightly uncomfortable being hit on tonight—probably because of this stupid bunny costume.

“We look so fucking stupid,” you groaned as you chuffed back your drink fully in hopes of getting drunk enough that you won’t think about it.

“It’s all Jungkook’s fault.”

“Woah! I thought this was a classy party so let’s not point fingers now,” Jungkook said in pink bunny ears because he thought it would be so funny dressing like a bunny. In reality he had no costume and Bora was between choosing pink or white and when she decided on white Jungkook was stuck with the pink. He begged you to trade but you had an entire outfit already so you weren’t going to now.

His hands were up in surrender,

“Jungkook, it’s your fault. We were only supposed to be bunnies, you could’ve done literally anything else,” Bora said, making Jungkook roll his eyes.

“That would’ve looked so stupid Bora, are you dumb? Three bunnies at least makes it look like we planned this all ahead for pictures — which we need to take soon,” Jungkook said pointing at you two.

“Whatever you want to do, let's do it now because I’m not staying long,” you said as you typed away on your phone. You have been talking to Taehyung for a while through text and he will be coming for you soon.

“Why?” Bora asked as she twirled a piece of your hair between her fingers casually throwing in a compliment about how nice it looked.

“I’ve got work tomorrow and I have assignments to do,” you said as you locked your phone and put it down.

Jungkook’s eyes narrowed suspiciously, “It’s late as hell, you’re not gonna do assignments.”

You looked back at him with a poker face, “I have to try.”

“Y/n, you bullshitting me?” He asked with an amused expression.

“Probably.”

“Are you seeing someone?” He asked skeptically. All the signs are there, he's just trying not to jump to conclusions.

“I already told you no,” you rolled your eyes.

“Wait, why do you think Y/n is seeing someone? Are you seeing someone?” Bora asked, looking between you two confused.

“No, I’m not,” you said to her plainly.

“You’re a liar with pants on fire,” Jungkook said with a scoff. He really just wants to know, he has an idea on who with but he can’t just say it.

“I’m not wearing pants,” you said and he was so close to choking you out because why are you being so condescending?

“It’s a metaphor.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard it before but I don’t get it, I know it’s probably some history joke but it just doesn’t make sense, right?” You said with a little laugh making him nod his head in agreement.

“Wait. Stop changing the subject. Who are you seeing?” He said.

You laughed, “No one.”

“Y/n.”

“Jungkook.” You repeated in the same tone he used with you.

“Bora.”

“Bora shut up,” you and Jungkook said at the same time.

“Sorry that I don’t know what you guys are talking about,” Bora said with a scoff. As much as you loved Borea, she was the slowest of you three and never caught onto things as quickly. You’re not surprised that Jungkook suspected this since he brought it up the other day but you wanna see how long you can deny it.

“Go somewhere else then for a couple minutes,” Jungkook said pointing at a random corner of the party trying to direct her over there.

“You guys suck,” she said, flipping you off.

“Love you Bora,” you said with a wave as she walked away.

“Liar.”

“Why don’t you just admit you’re dating someone?” Jungkook asked and this time you couldn’t take the annoyance that was brewing.

“Jungkook, why are you pushing it? What does it matter?” You asked running your fingers through your hair to move it out of your face.

“Because I have my suspicions and if I’m right I want to at least make sure you’re okay,” he said and he was being honest. The last guy you dated cheated on you and the one before that was a manipulator so he feels like as a close friend of yours he has a right to make sure you’re not seeing another asshole.

“What are your suspicions?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest.

“You’re dating someone from campus.”

“Dating but in the loosest of term,” you said.

He rolled his eyes, “Alright seeing, you’re seeing someone on campus.”

“Okay sure.”

“But not a student,” he said, waiting to see if you’d react but you didn’t so much as blink.

You huffed in annoyance, “Stop speaking in incomplete sentences and just spit it out if you know.”

“Your professor.”

Your jaw dropped, “You did not just say that.”

Okay, you knew he thought you were seeing someone but there’s no way you two were obvious enough for Jungkook to notice. What a hypocrite you were as if you didn’t just tell him to spit it out.

“I did,” he said with a triumphant smirk now that he got an actual reaction out of you. You fought like little kids but it might be because you’re both just a teensy bit drunk.

“Jungkook, I'm not seeing my—him, and don’t say that again, someone might hear,” you whispered the last part.

“Alright, first of all you told me to spit it out, second don’t deny it, Y/n,” he said, making you roll your eyes.

“What are you talking about?” Deny. Deny. Deny.

“Girl, I just know. Bora’s been joking nonstop about it and I think you really did sleep with him at least. You’ve been ditching us more — which is normal… but I’m just saying, you won’t even tell us who it is. You’re being so secretive about it and it makes me think it’s him. Plus, any time I’m walking past the art room or walking you there I always see the way he looks at you. And what do you do? Well you get all blushy but nervous and guess what I found the other day? A big fat hickey on his neck the same day he got mad I was in the room,” Jungkook with w gasp at the end from how fast he rushed everything out.

“Jesus Christ, you’ve been holding all of that in?” You asked with a little laugh.

“Yes! I have, so I’m literally begging you Y/n just tell me I’m right,” Jungkook said.

“Fine! You’re right, I’m sleeping with him,” you groaned but he just cheered.

“Oh thank god,” he said, holding a hand to his chest, “You got a few screws loose or something?”

“You’re so dramatic.”

“And you’re so fucked.”

You didn’t argue on that as you released a sigh, “Yeah, I know.”

“So is he gonna come pick you up?” Jungkook asked now and you nodded your head as you checked your messages where Tae texted that he would be here in five minutes. He raised a hand to your black bunny ears and flicked the headband back, “Be safe.”

You smiled as he left your side, that was your best friend’s way of saying he would support you and your decisions. When Taehyung arrived shortly after you left the apartment door hugging your sides feeling a lot more naked now than you did inside the party.

Outside the building a guy dressed in an oversized gray hoodie, black ball cap, and black sweats stood at the door waiting and he turned to look at you, you smiled. You looked behind you as if you would see someone you knew coming down the stairs and when it was clear you practically ran to him.

Taehyung released a soft laugh as you nearly jumped on him looking exactly like you were supposed to, a cute bunny overly excited to see him. Why did you make him smile so much when it’s just the two of you?

“I’m cold,” you said with a pout as you hugged his waist, “I forgot my jacket at Jungkook’s place.”

“Mm,” he hummed, his thumb caressing your cheek softly as he couldn’t stop himself placing at least one kiss on your lips. It was short and sweet and he was quickly pulling away to take off his hat first. His hair was beginning to get longer and the fluff and waved made it look shaggier than usual. Usually you always see him looking all sexy and professional in class but whenever you get to see him looking like the epitome of boyfriend material, your heart flutters. His long hair shielded his face as he dipped his head down to pull off his big hoodie and handed it to you before slipping his hat back on.

Once it was on he took you by your hand and walked the short distance to where he had the car parked and asked, “Did you have fun?”

“It was alright but too many people,” you said, thanking him for holding the car door open for you. Before you fully got in the car you gave him a quick kiss that had him smiling.

The two of you sat in the car for a moment, the car was on and the overhead lights were on and he just grabbed your hand to press a kiss to your knuckle, “You’re coming over, right?”

“Obviously,” you smiled as you leaned over the console for another kiss. It’s like you just couldn’t keep your hands off each other, he was kissing you back just as eagerly.

The further you leaned back the more Taehyung followed after you and by accident, your bunny ears hit the rear view mirror and knocked them down your head. You whined about the sudden pain while he was hit by one of the black ears making him move back laughing. You smacked your lips in annoyance as you sat back properly and yanked them off. He bit back a smile as he reached up to turn off the light and drive off.

He would be lying if he said he was patient but in truth, he couldn’t wait to have you. You ran for his bedroom chasing each other's mouths and when you were inside, you practically pushed him onto the bed giggling like you’ve just had the best idea ever. Taehyung felt so giddy in the moment and all he could do was smile as you took off his hoodie and slipped back on your bunny ears, “Well? You don’t like my costume? I thought I looked at least a little hot.”

“So cute,” Taehyung smiled boyishly and it took everything in him not to dig his face in one of his pillows. You crossed your arms over your chest rolling your eyes playfully and pretended like you didn’t see his outstretched hand beckoning you forward. You crawled onto the bed knocking the headband off your head as he began to kiss along your arm, guiding you to lay down so he could get on top and kiss you. You gladly let him take the lead, arms wrapping around his neck to hold him while his tongue licked along your lip.

Your legs were spread around him hoisted up at the knee and he took the chance to sit up between them and just take in the sight of you. You looked so pretty and he couldn’t stop himself from pulling on your clothes to get them off. He kissed along your exposed thighs trailing up toward your stomach and purposely skipping your pelvis even if his hands grazed your hip bones.

You wore nothing under your costume and Taehyung would be lying if he said that didn’t make him just a little jealous. It wasn’t anything serious but all he could think about tonight was how many people would hit on you. It’s no secret you were very pretty and he always worried that you’ll realize he’s too old for you and he can’t have that. If it means he has to give you all the pleasure your body can take, he will.

Taehyung looked at your exposed breasts licking his lips. Once your eyes meet he couldn’t help but finally hover over you and press open mouthed kisses to your mounds, swirling his tongue around your nipples in a way that caught you by surprise making your hand circle into his hair. Taehyung tugged a stiff bud between his teeth, rolling the other between his fingertips and you had to bite down on your lip to keep an embarrassing moan from slipping out.

“Tae, please,” you whine, rubbing your thighs together in an attempt to get an ounce of friction between your legs. You would be a liar if you said you hadn’t been thinking about this all night. He hasn’t paid much attention to your gear yet but if he did he would see the clear line of arousal that coated your entrance.

Taehyung lets his lips ghost over your inner thigh, nipping gently at your soft flesh and his fingers seemed to dig into where he bit and spread your legs even further apart.

“I’m trying to appreciate what a pretty bunny I have,” he murmurs, pressing a warm kiss to the spot just below your belly button, “You look so hot, all those pictures you sent me almost made me want to keep you all to myself tonight.”

It was true too. Earlier he had to see his ex at the restaurant and he had wanted to spend the night with you but you had already made plans and he didn’t want to keep you from it. When you showed him your costume he was just alone at his house trying to talk himself out of calling you and asking you to wear it for him and him alone but he knew you should go and have fun with your friends.

In the end he couldn’t stop himself from going to pick you earlier than expected, tired of waiting.

His soft hair brushes against your inner thighs as he finally dips his head between them, finally seeing how wet you were and his fingers dug into your thighs unintentionally, “Baby, how long have you been like this?”

“All night,” you confessed, “Couldn’t stop thinking about you—ngh, fuck.”

Taehyung didn’t even let you finish when his tongue licked your wanting folds, releasing a quiet breath of relief at your taste. He does it a couple times as if testing the water and each time a line of slick connects your cunt to the tip of his tongue when he would pull away.

“Poor baby, I’ll make you feel good, okay?” he breathes.His lips close around your clit so suddenly that your body reacted drastically. Your spine curved off the bed, a hand tightening around his hair pulling on accident and he releases a low groan at the hard tug but it only made him be rougher. He pulled your legs over his shoulders so they weren’t in the way when his tongue lapped at your pool of arousal before coating your clit with it. His arms had hooked around your thighs to keep you from squirming away from him and he could tell you loved his soft manhandling. He purposely nudged his nose against your clit feeling you begin to grind your pussy against his lips seeking your own pleasure and he happily let you use him to get off. Everytime he went lower he dipped his tongue teasingly into your entrance before pulling on your left labia knowing it was more sensitive between his lips to listen to your moans grow louder.

“Taste so sweet,” he hummed in appreciation and finally decided to really put his tongue to work. Taehyung alternated between flicking his tongue over the swollen bundle of nerves and flattening his tongue into your folds and moving it side to side before swallowing it whole in his mouth. He was quite literally making out with your cunt and he held you firmly to keep you from moving away.

You were so close already and he wasn’t easing up when you pulled on his hair in warning, “Tae, I’m so close.”

“Mhm,” he nodded his head, feeling your pussy subconsciously following his head movement to keep his mouth on you, “Go ahead, let go, pretty girl.”

Without much warning a hand left your thigh so that his middle finger can toy on your entrance and before you knew it he was pushing it into your wanton beat. You released a loud whine trying to squeeze your legs around his head to push him back but he only pressed a second finger into your slick. You were so close already and he wasn’t easing up until he tasted your release on his tongue. Taehyung knew exactly where that soft spot behind your pubic bone was and curved his long fingers into it, repeatedly pressing into it every time he thrusted his fingers back in. You have to admit, he eats your pushy bettwr than any guy you’ve ever been with and it’s all because of how experienced he was. You almost felt jealous at the thought of how many times he went down on his wife like this—even if he told you it had been a long time since they were last intimate.

Taehyung was unaware of your growing thoughts, too focused on making you cum and unintentionally he snapped you out of your thoughts when he suddenly pulled his fingers out right before your orgasm hit you and replaced it with his tongue. Immediately your body seemed to react to the change and you pulled hard on his hair as you saw stars.

He kept his grip firm on your leg making sure his tongue licked up all of your release like a dog in search of water.

Even as your body tried to calm down he licked at your clit gently, soothing you down as he messily tried to sneak a hand down to his sweats to tug them down.

You both looked at each other with hungry eyes as he sat back on his haunches to yank his shirt off before moving to take his sweats and boxer briefs off. As if knowing the routine, you reached into his nightstand to find the box of condoms he bought with you and ripped into the package watching him stroke himself for some relief and let it point straight.

You sit up pulling him down by the gold necklace he usually wore and kissed him hard, tasting your own release on his tongue and it was all so messy. His chin was coated in your arousal that rubbed off on you and his stiff cock was in your hands as you worked the condom onto him. Taehyung fell forward making you fall back onto the bed as he pressed his hands into the mattress to keep from crushing you.

“Look at what you do to me, baby,” he groaned as he fucked his hard dick into your fist. You just moaned leading him toward your push and he slid in right between your folds teasingly as he ran his tip along them.

“I need you,” you whisper into his ears as he drops his head down against your chest to watch his cock catch against your opening and finally rock his hips forward.

You couldn’t stop your hips from meeting his and guide him in further with a moan, “Fuck.”

You arch up, pressing your breasts closer to his face and he wordlessly wrapped his lips around a hardened nipple in time with the way he pushed in until he was at the hilt.

“So tight,” he rasps around a nipple; slowly beginning to fuck his long dick inside you. You moan at the tug he made between his teeth when he draws his hips back before fucking into you harder this time. Taehyung was shamefully close to orgasm because of how hard you pulled on his hair and his back was curved up making him practically curl into your body to stuff his cock deeper. Your nails scratched along his back moaning his name, “Taehyung, I can’t—“

God; he turned you on so much and you were already so sensitive. Your legs hooked around his hips, the heels of your feet forcing him even deeper as your walls tightened around his length making him moan, slobbering all over your tits.

“You’re so fucking good to me, Angel,” he fucked you hard and slowly making you feel his entire length. His hair ticked your chin as he pulled his mouth away to trail kisses up your neck until he could kiss your lips. “Why are you so pretty?”

He was looking at you lovingly, driving his dick deeper and deeper and curving his hips at an angle that made him hit your sweet spot everytime.

You can only moan in response when Taehyung tried to pull out halfway but your feet wouldn’t let him and he had to resort to rocking and grinding his hips against yours, practically rutting into you.

“I don’t know,” you finally responded to his rhetorical question. You can feel the familiar tremors of another orgasm starting, making your thighs shake and he doesn’t ease up, determined to making you cum a second time before letting himself go. You dug your nails into his shoulder making him his at the pleasuring pain and your voice rose to a high pitch, “Oh my god, I—I—“

He kissed you hard as your orgasm hit you, making you tighten around his cock so hard that you triggered his own orgasm. “Oh fuck,” he groaned as he rocked his hips, cumming hard into the condom and hugging your body to his listening to your breathless pants.

After a moment to catch your breath, he pulled out carefully, dryly swallowing as he ran a soothing hand up your trembling thighs, “You did so good, you always do.”

“Mhm,” you mumbled, already turning on your side, completely tired out. Taehyung just smiled at the sight of you trying to curl yourself into the blanket and as he watched your eyes close tiredly, he cleaned off the mess from the two of you before crashing down onto the bed next to you.

“Honey, wake up.”

You released a soft moan as you rolled onto your stomach making the comforter wrap around you as you dug your face into the pillow. A low laugh filled the room as Taehyung reached a hand out to your hair. You were quite literally the definition of comfortable sleep. Your hair was a mess because of your eye mask, the sheets were tangled between your legs and you’re spread out on the bed with no care in the world.

He brushed some of the locks out of your face, “Y/n, wake up.”

You huffed as you pulled yourself up enough to reach for your phone and checked the time, a whine left your lips, “Tae, it’s like 11 in the morning, are you crazy?”

He looked at you strangely, “It’s noon, Y/n.”

“And a Sunday,” you told him as you slipped your sleeping mask back on, “You know how late it was when you picked me up from the party, how are you not tired? Plus, I have to work tonight.”

“Fine, sleep all you want then, I’m gonna do some work,” Taehyung said with a slight roll of his eyes. You’re right, it’s a Sunday and typically those are lazy days, especially for Taehyung. He likes to just hang around the house reading, playing classical or jazz, maybe enjoy a coffee outside and you know… having the person you’re seeing join you.

He gets it, he really does. You’re tired and you did have a late night. He did too but he hadn’t gotten tipsy so he’s not hungover. He woke up early and did his usual Sunday habit but once it passed noon he wanted to see if you’d wake up anytime soon. You do work tonight and he probably won’t see you tomorrow so he would like to be with you today but you’re clearly tired.

You have a very chaotic schedule like most college students trying to bounce between strange class times and stranger work schedules so honestly your weeks all look different. He’s got more consistency clearly so he has time to relax and be at home or go out for drinks without having to do things so late. It’s clearly been a little difficult making your schedules align sonce yours is unpredictable. Some days you have early morning lectures and late night shifts. Other times you have three lectures in one day but they’re hours apart and they go well past the sun sets. Some weekends you work, some you don’t. Sometimes you get off early, sometimes you get asked to cover a shift.

Don’t even get him started on your crazy schedule for your art piece for the exhibition. You’re stressed and tired and last night you had your fun.

You went out with your friends, got drunk, danced, did whatever… maybe talked to guys or played a drinking game—just had fun. Then of course the two of you had done some things in the car when you sobered up enough and the night just grew later and later.

So he let you sleep.

Things have been tense for you lately. With school, work, the spring exhibition, balancing your friends and still trying to make time to at least talk to Taehyung, it’s all been too much for you. To make matters worse, you and Jungkook aren’t speaking to each other and if you do it tends to end in an argument over the same thing each time.

“You wanted me to be honest and I was,” you told him as he walked with you to the art room, “So why can't you just trust that I know what I’m doing?”

“It’s not that I don’t trust you, Y/n. You’re my best friend, of course I fucking trust you and that’s not why I keep trying to talk to you about this,” Jungkook said as the two of you stopped in front of the building, “I’m worried for you, alright? How long has it been since you and Hoseok broke up?”

You didn’t say anything because you knew he wasn’t actually asking. He didn’t even give you time to speak anyway, “And when did you hook up with V?”

When Jungkook said V he was referring to Taehyung, it was an easy nickname you could use in public. Once again, Jungkook didn’t give you much time to speak, “I get it, everyone wants to have a rebound and I was all for it, I was joking right there alongside Bora about it.”

“So then what are you trying to say right now?” You asked him with your arms crossed over your chest as you leaned against the building wall with windows, you knew that if Taehyung was inside he would be watching.

Jungkook took a deep breath as he moved to stand close to you, “What I’m saying is I don’t want to see you get hurt again.”

“I won’t,” you told him but it was very clear he didn’t fully believe it.

The thing is, Jungkook really did care for you. He loved you and it wasn’t in a romantic way, he just loved you as a friend and that wasn’t something up for debate. If Bora was going through this exact situation he would be equally concerned.

It’s not that he has a disliking toward Professor Kim because if anything, it’s the complete opposite. He has a lot of respect for the guy because of his professionalism and what he’s done to help his students. Jungkook doesn’t think Taehyung has bad intentions with you but he also can’t fully support a relationship that has been built because the two of you went through very similar experiences and you’re both still coping.

And you can lie to yourself all you want about how what Namjoon didn’t bother you anymore but Jungkook knows you. He knew that when you were telling him and Bora about it you were fighting back tears. He knows that you didn’t want to confront Hoseok and that you ended it with him so that you wouldn’t have to talk about it again. That’s not coping, that’s ignoring the problem and once again, Jungkook knows you. He knows that if you don’t deal with it any time soon then you’re just going to let it bubble up until one day you just break down and he highly doubts Professor Kim would handle that well.

Taehyung is older, he’s a bit more mature and level headed which is what you need but Jungkook just doesn’t want you to think it’s more than it is so that you end up hurt again. You need to talk with Taehyung and really discuss what kind of relationship you’re both looking for and until then Jungkook can’t fully support it.

He’s not going to sit around and watch his friend get hurt again.

With a reluctant sigh he finally said, “Am I taking you to work later?”

“If you can,” you mumbled as he ruffled your hair with a final goodbye. You waited outside for a moment trying to clear your thoughts.

You’ve known Jungkook for a long time and he’s a very good friend. Honestly sometimes it feels like you don’t deserve the kid, sure he can be immature and annoying at times but at the end of the day he cares deeply for those around him and you feel lucky to be one of them. He’s put up with you for years now so you understand where he’s coming from but you also feel like you’re capable of making your own decisions.

He’s right, you don’t know how your relationship will go with Taehyung but you don’t want to think about that right now.

Right now you want to finish up your work and enjoy the short amount of time you have with Taehyung because despite being so different, it works for you two. It’s almost like you balance each other out and you haven’t felt that way with someone in a while. You know that you have an age gap and it’s not that you think you’re this mature woman who knows everything but you’re also not a kid.

You’re at an age where you’re navigating through adulthood but you also can still say that you are a bit naive on some things and it can make things confusing for you. You know Taehyung doesn’t have bad intentions with you but you also know that he was once a married man to his college sweetheart who broke his heart. A man doesn’t just bounce back from that in a year’s time no matter how much he despises the woman now.

“What are you doing?” Yuna asked so suddenly that you jumped and she smiled, “Aren’t you going in?”

“Yeah,” you said with a sigh as you followed her into the studio for your printmaking class.

You walked past Taehyung like he was nothing more than your professor and he greeted you like you were nothing but a student. It goes like this almost every day you see him on campus but then the night or weekends roll around and it’s an entirely different story. It’s a bit exhausting but you prefer it this way.

“So, uh, you know who came up to me this morning?” Yuna asked, making you shrug curiously as you went to the usual table the two of you worked at, Seungjin already there waiting.

“Namjoon, he asked if I knew where you were but I said no,” Yuna told you, “I don’t know if I was supposed to say yes or not because—well, did you guys break up?”

Seungjin looked at you now, “Wait, you two broke up? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because I don’t like telling people my business,” you said in a snappy tone that Seungjin knew you weren’t serious about, “But we broke up before he left.”

Namjoon was just on a two week retreat for his major and that’s the only reason why he stopped blowing up your phone other than that day in the beginning when Taehyung scolded you for walking out. You knew he wasn’t done trying to get you back because even if the relationship was short lived and he cheated, the two of you worked well together. That’s why it bothered the shit out of you that he threw it away when the two of you could’ve been something great.

There’s no point in thinking about it now though because you’ll never take a man who cheated on you back.

“So it’s only been a few weeks?” Yuna asked, “That makes so much sense. I was wondering why you haven’t talked about him or why he seemed so mad when I told him I hadn’t seen you.”

“Are you working tonight?” Seungjin asked, trying to change the subject when he could tell you weren’t feeling it anymore.

In the beginning you barely talked to him and even Yuna, but lately he’s been hanging out with Jungkook a lot and you’ve been talking to Yuna more regularly so you’ve all just become closer friends. Seungjin knows your work schedule because most of the time if Taehyung can’t pick you up, Jungkook does and since the guy is always with Jungkook, he’s basically memorized your work schedule.

“Sadly,” you mumbled as you stared down at your work struggling to find out where to start, “I’ve got so much shit to do it’s stressing me out.”

Taehyung’s gotten a little bit better at hiding what the two of you have but it doesn’t make things easier. He still can’t fully explain your relationship because there’s a lot of factors that play a part in it.

First, your age. You’re both very clearly in different points of your lives even if your age difference isn’t too bad, it’s still not fully acceptable.

It’s not like he’s using the fact that you’re young and a bit naive in his favor because he honestly thinks you’re mature. He’s not going to say you’re mature for your age because he doesn’t like what that saying means. You’re mature because that’s just how you are and it has nothing to do with your age, just your person. He’s not sleeping with you because you’re young but behave like you’re grown.

He’s sleeping with you and talking to you every chance he has because he genuinely enjoys your time. He enjoys sleeping in bed with you and listening to your rants over the littlest things. He likes how enthusiastic you get when you talk about your favorite show or explain the meaning behind your art. He likes that you listen to his own rants about jazz music and which artist is favorite. He likes that you don’t know how to do some things but you’re always looking to learn something new.

Taehyung has gotten used to not being able to interact with you during the day. It’s not that the two of you can’t talk, it's that you shouldn’t. There’s too much tension there any time you do. You can tell by the way he looks at you with warm eyes that turn your insides giddy even if you want to say they don’t. He speaks to you gently and his tone very obviously changes when he’s talking to the others so the both of you are just paranoid to be found out.

The only time he really gets to see you is late at night and that makes him feel like an absolute garbage of a man because he’s not using you for sex. That’s not all he wants but if the only time he gets to see you is after you get off work, then it looks that way, especially considering you’re usually very eager to sleep with him that sometimes he can’t catch up.

“You don’t have class tomorrow, do you?” Taehyung asked as he twisted a lock of your hair around his index finger. You were laying on his chest as some A24 film played on the television in your bedroom. You’ve just finished having sex and now you’re just trying to enjoy some time together before morning comes and you have to go back to acting like there’s nothing between you.

“No, but I’ll be busy with the project,” you mumbled against his chest as you made yourself more comfortable against him.

“I’ve got a meeting in the morning but I’m free the majority of the day, there’s going to be the other teachers so I won’t have to stay,” Taehyung offered up, “Maybe we can do something.”

“I’d like that,” you told him as you tried paying attention to the movie but Taehyung wasn’t as interested. He wanted to talk to you because that’s what people in a relationship should do.

“I saw you and your friend talking outside today, everything okay?” Taehyung asked as you looked up at him.

“Yeah.”

He stayed quiet for a moment as he tried to decipher your expression and what you really meant. He does wish you would communicate a little more. You’re very obviously stressed about numerous things and maybe he could help with it a little but not if you won’t talk to him. He was used to his ex ignoring him in favor of keeping it bottled in and resenting him for her own lack of communication but he doesn’t want that with you. He wants to ask more but he won’t force you to tell him.

“Jungkook figured out about us,” you said before gnawing on your bottom lip in fear that he would be mad. Taehyung took a deep breath as he nodded his head, making you rush to say, “He won’t say anything, trust me.”

“I mean… if you trust him then I do too,” Taehyung said. He knows you’re close with Jungkook and that does make him nervous sometimes but he can’t come out of nowhere and tell you that so he just accepts it.

“And…” you bit your lip once more and Taehyung found himself bringing his thumb up to pull your lip out as it reddened.

“Talk to me,” he said gently. You’re opening up to him little by little but something is clearly on your mind that you’re struggling to say. Every time you get shy and nervous he doesn’t see you as the one who made the first move in his car that night, he just sees someone he cares a lot about looking worried and anxious. He just wants to be here for you.

“My ex has been asking around for me,” you told him honestly and he took a deep breath in thought.

“Really?” Taehyung looked away from you for a moment. Your ex was a cheater, he cheated on someone as beautiful and smart as you and in reality he’s also the reason why you and Taehyung got close. He knows that he’ll never go back to his cheating ex but you might feel differently. You might be more easily swayed into going back to him and it’s not like Taehyung could do anything about it. Your ex is closer to your age, he’s known you a little longer and all of your friends know of him. He’s not a secret to you and you’re not a secret to him so he would have no choice but to understand if you took him back.

“I mean, it’s just a bit tiring, I thought we were over this but it looks like he’s back to trying,” you said with a defeated sigh before cuddling back into Taehyung.

He pressed his lips to your hair, not really kissing you but just appreciating the intimacy, “Would you?”

“What?” Your brows furrowed as you looked up at him. Taehyung had never regretted his words so quickly looking at the way you pulled away from him clearly taken back. He cleared his throat, “I mean would you want to try with him again?”

“Would you?” You asked a little annoyed, “Would you want to try with your ex wife again if she asked?”

“No,” Taehyung sat up with you, “Of course not, but I would understand if you did.”

You couldn’t help but scoff, “So you would understand if I went back to my cheating ex? Good to know that you understand if someone takes back a cheater.”

“Baby that’s not what I mea—“ Taehyung tried to say but you were already moving off the bed, “Hey I just mean… you’re both still young and make mistakes—you weren’t dating long before and if there’s still lingering feelings…”

“If I still felt something for him, why would I be with you?” You asked, making him bite his lip nervously, “And you think just because I’m young it’s alright to just forgive someone who hurt me? Nice to know.”

“No, honey pl—“

“I’m gonna get in the shower,” you cut him off just as he was getting up.

He watched you leave and he sat on the edge of your bed running his hand over his face in frustration. That’s not what he meant at all. He was trying to say he would understand your feelings but that was clearly the problem. Why would he even think you would leave him the second you got the chance? You’re not his ex but he just doesn’t want to lose you when he just started feeling love again.

Wait, not love. It’s too early for that and you think so too but he means it affectionately. Why did he have to pretend like he would understand? He wouldn’t. He just doesn’t want you or your friend to think he’s the one controlling your relationship.

He has to trust you and not assume you’ll leave him.

Taehyung knows he upset you last night. That wasn’t his intention by any means and he feels like shit for making you feel any sort of way. You know your worth just how he knows his and it’s unfair that he questioned you about it. He feels so stupid and he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it all morning.

He wasn’t able to pay attention in his meetings because all he could think about was how to be better for you. He knew you would be busy for a bit today so he didn’t want to bother you early on but you agreed to spend the day together. He decided that he would get groceries before you came over later, maybe a nice home cooked meal and some wine would ease the tension.

Going grocery shopping was one of those things Taehyung despised and there was on specific reason as to why. He’s a 30 year old man going shopping alone—it was a recipe to be hit on by single women his age. He could always say he’s in a relationship but he can’t go into detail and unfortunately if there’s no wedding ring on his finger then it doesn’t matter much. If anything it’s easy to note the pale ring mark on his left finger from when he used to have a wedding ring.

He walked around the market pushing a shopping cart filled with his usual groceries along with some things he knew you would like and tried to hurry this along.

“Tae?”

His breath hitched as he came to a slow stop, but he didn’t turn around or even look at Jihyun until she stood in front of him. Why did she feel the need to talk to him after what she did and why was he seeing her now of all times?

“I thought it was you,” she said shyly, “Doing some shopping?”

“Yup,” Taehyung said as he looked over a bag of coffee. He wasn’t exactly sure what he was looking for or what the difference between dark roast or light roast but he was trying. Jihyun didn’t say anything as she looked at the bag, “Trouble deciding?”

What was she getting at? Taehyung thought. It was pretty clear he didn't want to talk to her and when he left with you the day of the lunch where they ran into her he thought it was obvious then too.

He knows he can just choose a bag of coffee and it’ll be fine but he wants to choose one you would like. You’re a coffee drinker but he’s heard you order drinks before and you like your coffee a certain way so he doesn’t want to mess this up. Jihyun bit her lip, “Light roast has more caffeine, when did you start drinking coffee?”

He set the bag back down and changed it ou yt for a dark roast one, “It’s for Y/n.”

He wasn’t going to thank her for her help because she thought it was for him but he is a little thankful that she helped him decide which you would like better. You like caffeine but you hate the taste of it. He dropped the bag down into his cart and went to look for creamer.

“So are you two really seeing each other? She seems a bit youn—“

“We are and she is but she’s mature, more mature than some other people I’ve met before,” Taehyung said trying to leave with his shopping cart, “And she understands my interests.”

He’s not going to say exactly how because it would easily give away that you’re his student but he will say that. He doesn’t feel the need to explain anything to Jihyun but he does want her to know that he’s doing just fine without her so she can stop trying to ask him about you.

“Jihyun,” Taehyung looked at her one last time and could see the look of hope in her eyes, “My name is Taehyung, not Tae.”

He turned his back to her and as if the thought of you alone brought this up, you were calling and he was smiling as he walked away and answered, “Hello?”

“I am at your place, am I too early? You’re not home, sorry I should’ve called before coming over,” you said through the phone.

“I’m just at the store but I’m heading over to pay right now,” Taehyung said, “There’s a key under the potted plant by the door, let yourself in and do you mind taking Tannie out for a walk? I haven’t had a chance.”

“Yes sir, I’d love to take him out,” you said jokingly, making him laugh softly.

He left without another word to Jihyun and she watched him walk away like she wasn't even there. She’s being selfishly unreasonable to expect anything else after what she did but she regrets it so much. She was at a point in their marriage where she thought he was losing his love for her. He was always so busy with work or something else that he wouldn’t pay attention to her. She thought he was avoiding her and in the end she fell for the attention she received from someone else and ruined her marriage with the love of her life.

Call her a cheater but don’t call her a liar, he really is or was the love of her life. They got together at such an impressionable age and it was so sweet and romantic and now she has to watch him be that way again with someone young and beautiful. It hurts.

Taehyung got back to a surprisingly quiet apartment feeling dejected, maybe you were still out with Yeontan or may—

“Boo!” You jumped up from behind his kitchen counter holding his pup up like you both surprised him and he nearly dropped the bags in surprise. A huge smile spread on his face and he couldn’t stop himself from saying, “Cute.”

“What did you get?” You asked as you let Yeontan run off in order to help him get the bags. He shrugged, “Just stuff to make later. How was your painting?”

You sighed, “Tiring. I’m almost done but I feel like something is missing.”

“Just remember not to overdo it. Sometimes less is better and if you’re happy with it now it’s better to stop, I want to see it,” Taehyung said.

He realized that he was stressed this morning for nothing. You’re not mad at him because of last night when he thought you would be. He needs to stop assuming that you’ll react the way Jihyun used to. She would snap on him for every little thing but you’re not like that and it’s refreshing and reassuring so he needs to remember you’re different.

You’re like spring. Yes, you’ve got a bit of an attitude sometimes but you’re so unlike anyone he’s ever been with. You’re fun and bright and make him smile without trying. You work hard and it shows through your work.

Taehyung cupped your face in his hands, “You’re so cute.”

“I thought I was hot,” you teased with a smile as he pressed a soft kiss against your lips.

Things are good, great even, at least that’s what you think. You feel secure with Taehyung and you haven’t felt that way in a long time. Sure, you both are still very much keeping it a secret but you’re heed to it now. There’s not much you can do about it but you’re so close to graduating and then it’s all over.

You’ve finished your painting for the spring exhibit which is just around the corner and you couldn’t be happier. With that out of the way you’ve got more free time to do other things and even though you work and have classes, it opens up a lot of time for you.

Tonight you did have to work but you spent most of your shift with Jungkook up until he was off. Like usually he was off before you and he asked if you wanted him to come back and take you home but you assured him Taehyung would.

Thankfully you didn’t have to close tonight since it was a weeknight. The bar was still open but there was another closer and you got off early so Taehyung was planning on picking you up and driving you home.

As your shift came to an end you followed your usual routine of putting your things away, collecting your tips, and clocking out. Taehyung had already texted you that he was running a couple minutes behind but you were just excited to see him.

“Y/n?”

You seemed to freeze up, you had just left through the back alley to go home and there in front of you was a familiar stranger. Namjoon stood there with his hands shoved in his pockets nervously. You looked around the lot to see if you could spot Taehyung yet but you couldn’t, “What?”

“Can we talk?” He asked as he took a step closer to you, “I just don’t get what happened between us.”

“You’re still on that? Jeez, Joon I didn’t think you would be the type to not let shit go,” you scoffed in annoyance and began walking down one end of the alley to get to the main street.

Namjoon followed after you, “What do you think would have happened? You stop talking to me out of the blue right before my trip and tell me it’s over but you can’t tell me why?”

“You know why,” you turned to him angrily, “Or what? Were you hoping I was just stupid enough to not realize you slept with someone who was supposed to be my best friend?”

Namjoon came to a stop. This was the first time you ever said this to him. You had told Taehyung how much you didn’t want to confront him about it but you had no choice. You needed him to stop asking for you and just leave you alone. You scoffed, “Surprised? Hate to break it to you but you were more obvious than you think. So are you happy? Now you know why I left you… you thought you could cheat on me and I’ll never find out, what a fucking joke.”

You turned away from him, a familiar black car parked on the street and you just wanted to get away from this conversation. With a smile on your face you headed toward the car, Namjoon following after you.

He grabbed on your arm tightly, yanking you back to him and nearly making you stumble, “Come on Y/n, I fucked up, I was planning on telling you but you’ve just been igno—“

You jumped in surprise at the loud honk of a car horn and you quickly turned to Taehyung who you knew was watching and you really didn’t want him to come out and expose himself but you know that if Namjoon kept bothering you he would. You pulled your arm free, “I’m done with you, alright? Frankly I don’t ever want to speak to you again so from now on why don’t we act like we don’t know each other?”

With that you left him standing there shocked and got in Taehyung’s car.

Despite it being dark out and Taehyung’s windows being heavily tinted, he still looked out at Namjoon who stood there frozen. You had gotten in his car but he was focused on the guy who just grabbed his girlfriend roughly. Before he could ask if everything was okay, you practically lunged toward him and he caught you over the middle console with a smile on his face.

You pressed your lips against his and he couldn’t help but kiss back confidently, a hand in your hair keeping you close. He nearly forgot about the guy standing outside until he opened his eyes and saw that he was gone now. He gently pushed you away only to watch you pout and ask for more.

He ran his thumb over your pouty lip, “You okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” You asked, trying to kiss him again but he only leaned back trying to get you to talk. You gave him a quick kiss on his lips before sitting back, “I’m fine, I swear. That was my ex but we’re all good now.”

“That was him?” He asked, seeming bothered now and he reached out for your arm, the one Namjoon grabbed roughly, “Did he hurt you or anything?”

You just smiled as you sat back up to kiss him again. He turned away from you, “Baby, let’s talk first.”

You whined, “He didn’t and I don’t want to talk. I want to kiss you because you’re so hot and I haven’t seen you all day.”

“I know but…” he bit his lip. He should trust you. You said you’re okay and you left the guy standing there to come to him so he should trust you. He does trust you. A smile came to his face as he tried to stop stressing, “I missed you too, love.”

With that he placed a kiss on the tip of your nose before kissing you again. You happily deepened the kiss between you and it was quickly getting heated. Taehyung seems to always forget where he is when it’s just you two and he nearly forgot you were in his car again until you tried going over the middle console to get on his lap.

His hands immediately went to your waist, “Wait, let’s wait till we get to your place.”

“Why? Doesn’t this remind you of our first time?” You asked, beginning to leave soft kisses along his jaw, “We can do it again.”

He bit his lip, already feeling a little turned on at the idea but he doesn’t want it to seem like a secret when you’re together. He prefers to be in bed with you when you have sex but he’ll admit, you’ve made his sex life more exciting. You’re willing to get your hands on him anywhere you are and God did that make him feel wanted. He played with the hem of your skirt with one hand as the other reached for the lever under his seat.

“One more time,” he said with a boyish smile when you squealed happily and went back to making out with him.

The end of the semester was quickly approaching. School has gone easier now since you have your major assignments done and you’ve been able to relax a little more. It’s a bit funny to be in Taehyung’s class acting like a regular student knowing he was on top of you practically every night. What is even funnier is to tease him when you shouldn’t.

Taehyung has had to stand through this entire lecture acting like you weren’t sending him the most daring texts he’s ever received. The first one he got this morning was already enough to make him bruise his lip by how hard he bit into it.

y/n: gonna be waiting for u later in this

It was a picture of you in a cute lingerie set and every time he looked at you he couldn’t help but picture it right under your clothes. You knew that’s what he thought about, that’s why you would occasionally gnaw on the end of your pen as you looked him up and down like you just needed him right then and there. It made him stumble over his words.

The other time you texted him was halfway through the lecture. He had just gotten back to his text and looked over your text, unable to help himself from looking up at you but you were too distracted by your friends to notice him. He slid over the notification and quickly responded to your other text.

y/n: if u look at me again I won’t be able to stop myself from giving u and the whole class a show

tae: be a good girl and wait till after class

You looked up at him when you received his text and he didn’t need a response to know you would show up. He had to stay late tonight and finish up some paperwork so he wouldn’t be able to see you before you went to work. He had been bummed out about it but later on, when it was well into the evening, you did as told.

The sun was beginning to set and he was alone in his art room until you came along. He smiled at the sight of you entering the room and closed his files. You smiled mischievously, “You wanted to speak to me, sir?”

God, you knew what you did to him.

He had to bite back a groan as he looked outside the windows to make sure there was no one around, “I can’t speak to you if you’re so far.”

You walked up to him until you stood directly in front of him and he looked at you with lust in his eyes, “Bad girl, just because you’re done with your painting doesn’t mean you can distract me.”

You bit your lip, “What do you mean, sir?”

He chuckled as he ran his fingers through his hair, “Sending me all those dirty messages in class?”

Your brows furrowed cutely, “Hm… but you liked them?”

Taehyung dropped his voice down to a whisper, “I did.”

“So why are we still out here?” You used the same whispering tone and just like that, you were following him into the familiar art storage closet. Before you could even surprise him with a peak at the lingerie he was pushing you against the shelves and kissing you hard. You released a surprised whimper trying to kiss him back. Your fingers quickly toyed with the buttons of his white long sleeve and Taehyung let his hands slide under your shirt trying to inch it off your body already.

His fingers worked diligently to pull it off as he felt you begin to unbutton the front of his shirt with the need to just touch already. Once it was undone your hands moved to his hair, ruffling it up when he yanked your shirt off displaying the lingerie to his hungry eyes. Your leg went up to wrap around him as the other stayed locked to keep you from falling and Taehyung fit perfectly against you as he kissed down your neck while his other hand began to play with your skirt.

“You’re so cute,” he mumbled between kisses and you sighed with a playful roll of your eyes.

“Everytime I try to look hot for you, you just call me cute.”

He laughed, close to giggling as he pulled away to look at you again, “You look hot and cute and sexy and beautiful and I just want to eat you up every time I see you, okay?”

You smiled shyly now at his words and tried to look away in embarrassment but he just kissed you harder, forgetting where you were.

The campus was mostly empty except for those who had night classes. The art department was empty minus the two of you so you weren’t worried about being caught but maybe you should have been.

When Jihyun got to campus she wasn’t sure what she even planned on doing. The last time she saw Taehyung he barely acknowledged her and he told her to stop calling him by a nickname. She knows how badly she messed up but it’s been a year. Maybe she could talk to him and they could at least be cordial? Maybe someday they’ll look back on this strange time apart and realize that they really were meant to always be together… he’ll hopefully forgive her mistakes and they can move past this.

“Taehyung?” She called out to him as she stepped into an empty art room. She’s not sure why she thought he would still be here but she just assumed. He was always working late and she didn’t know where he lived so this was her best bet. Clearly she looks stupid now as she stands alone in a huge room where Taehyung isn’t at. This was so clearly his room too, he had some of his art hanging along with other students work and for the first time ever, she actually decided to pay attention to them.

She passed by art work belonging to students she’s never met, they were all winning pieces from seminars and contests. Just before her was a beautiful oil painting with a name and year displayed proudly in the corner. It was one of Taehyung’s mentees.

‘Full Bloom’

By Y/n L/n, December 10, 2022

___ University

She seemed to freeze up at the name. It couldn’t be…

“Ow!”

A light voice whined as a loud thump followed and suddenly everything seemed to be connecting. There was laughter that followed and her attention immediately drifted to the direction of the noise. It went quiet again but it was too late, Jihyun was already walking to the closet.

At this point she didn’t care what she saw, she just needed to know if she was right or not.

Taehyung rubbed soothing circles against the back of your head as he whispered apologies for accidentally making you bump your head against a shelf. You had a cute pout on your lips at the pain and the fact that the two of you had to stop. All you’ve done is make out but your clothes was half off and you just wanted to keep going.

You barely had your lips brushing against his with the sudden yank on the door seemed to frighten you both away from each other. Taehyung’s initial instinct was to distance himself from you as soon as possible worried that it was a school head or worse another student but he thought about you instead. Your shirt was completely off while his was merely unbuttoned and knowing you were more undressed than him made him immediately hold you to his chest and turn his body toward the door to hide you better.

“Oh my god.”

You pressed your face into his front in embarrassment and a little bit of fear but Taehyung turned toward the door, brows scrunching together and voice raising, “Jihyun?”

You jumped, slightly startled and tried to pull away. Taehyung softened his hold on you just enough for you to snag your shirt off the shelf and hurry to put it on. Jihyun looked between you two, “She’s your student. You’re sleeping with your fucking student?”

Taehyung hushed her, “What are you doing here? Get out!”

You dressed yourself back up properly as Taehyung did the same and he seemed to look back at you once more before stepping out of the closet to follow his ex wife. You would be lying if you said your hands weren’t shaking and your face wasn’t heating up. This was all your fault.

You’re the one who came onto him in the beginning.

You’re the one who practically pushed him into a relationship and put his job on the line. You’re the one who did all this knowing his ex wife was still stupid enough to look for him.

God, you were the worst.

Feeling close to tears you hurriedly left the closet listening to Taehyung’s deep voice arguing with Jihyun.

“You come to my job and you—“

“I came to talk about us! I didn’t know you would be in the closet trying to fuck your student! What happened to you?” Jihyun shouted, “Is it because of me? Did I push you to this, Tae? I never meant to hurt you, I just…”

You looked around the art room for your things trying to hide your face because for some reason this suddenly felt wrong. It shouldn’t feel that way yet it does and all you wanted to do was escape. Why was she yelling at him like you’re a homewrecker?

Was it because you were his student or young? Or was it because she wanted him to forgive her cheating and realized he wouldn’t?

Taehyung turned to you as you headed straight for the door and he went right after you, “Y/n, wait,” but you were gone and practically running away. He could chase you but what would he do if someone saw him and asked what was wrong? You had to work soon and he would just have to wait even if he didn’t want to.

“You need to leave,” Taehyung said sternly as he glared at Jihyun, “I don’t know what you thought was going to happen by coming here but you need to go.”

“Taehyung, she’s your student, I just… do you realize the trouble you can get into?”

“Y/n graduates in four months and either way it’s none of your fucking business,” Taehyung said genuinely sounding angry and Jihyun can’t remember the last time he sounded this upset. Not even when he found out she was cheating, he had just hid his face in his hands like he wanted to cry and asked for a divorce. He scoffed, “Or what? Are you going to say something about it?”

“I—I don’t know,” Jihyun said truthfully, “But this isn’t you. You would never sink so low to sleep with a student and I know it’s my fault. I hurt you and I pushed you away and now you’re acting like a completely different person. You’ve never yelled at me before. Taehyung come on… we were her age when we started dating, you can’t possibly expect anything to come out of this relationship. She’s young and naive and she’s not looking fo—“

“Stop talking about Y/n like you know her,” Taehyung said through gritted teeth, “And stop acting like you have any moral fucking high ground. Did you forget what you did to me? You threw away ten years for a man you’re not even with anymore! Why would I care about what you have to say?”

Jihyun looked shocked like she was really surprised to be called out this way by him. He was packing up his things quickly as he said, “And we know it’s wrong because I’m her professor and she’s my student but… but it’s not wrong. We’re adults and we’ve connected and if you want to completely destroy another relationship of mine and put my job on the line because you’re an insecure woman who thought I would want you after what you did to me… then you’re cruel too.”

“Taehyung…”

“Do what you want Jihyun, tell other people, I don’t care anymore but don’t mention Y/n. If you want anyone to suffer then make it me, I’m the one who divorced you,” Taehyung said with a tired sigh, “But I’m done being nice. I tried to be cordial every time we saw each other after the divorce but if you want to get back at me then whatever, there’s nothing I can do.”

She knew it wasn’t technically wrong. You were an adult and so was he and the only thing that made it wrong was the fact that he was your college professor. She hated you from the second she saw the way Taehyung looked at you and all she wanted to do was ruin this. She was a selfish woman who made a mistake only to realize it was too late to regret it.

It’s the same as Namjoon, he made a mistake and when he found out there was possibly someone else, he came to regret it.

Now Namjoon’s out of the picture and Jihyun should be too but all she wants to do is get him back. She’s willing to look past this and get back with him but he doesn’t want that and she can’t force him to. Without a word, Jihyun turned on her heel and left him in his art room with no clue as to what she would do about this.

If she went right to the Dean then he would lose his job and probably never be able to work at another college again. The University wouldn’t want the news out so he wouldn’t have to worry about it getting out unless Jihyun told other people. If she admitted that it was you he’s not sure what would happen. These things were always easier for the man and he doesn’t want anyone to do anything to hurt you.

God, it was a mistake to get involved with a student… but not because of you. If you two had just developed a relationship when you weren’t a student any longer things would have been different.

He was sitting at his desk now with his head in his hands just thinking of everything that could happen. He could easily work with his parents at a museum. He could continue his art somewhere else and not teach but what about you? What if people assumed he had always favorited you? What if they thought he helped with your art? Your submission for the seminar would immediately be disqualified if they had even an ounce of suspicion that he helped—especially with his status and credentials in the art world.

Fuck, he screwed it up badly for you.

You went ghost for two days. You didn’t answer his calls or texts and you skipped out on class. It worried him and you knew it but you couldn’t face him. It’s not that you feel like you did anything wrong but you’re embarrassed. She’s his ex wife so she doesn’t mean shit to you but you’re sure you confirmed her original suspicions and that pissed you off. You’re just some young and naive slut who he’s keeping a secret out of shame. It’s not true but you just know that’s what she’s thinking and you couldn’t stick around to hear it that night. You still want to be with Taehyung but You’re sportier that she knocked some sense into him or something. Maybe he’s blowing up your phone because he’s trying to end things. You also know you should go back to class but if he just completely pretends like you don’t exist or worse you find out that everyone knows, you’re scared at what would happen.

“You haven’t done anything wrong,” Bora said, touching your leg to comfort you. After weeks, maybe even months of keeping her in the dark, you finally had to speak up. She was your best friend too and you needed them both to make you feel better. Jungkook sat on your couch with an arm around your shoulders, “Seriously Y/n, you haven’t and I honestly don’t think Taehyung feels any different. You need to talk to him.”

Your friends were right and yet you couldn’t say yes.

They spent the day with you even if Jungkook had to go to work. Technically you were supposed to work but he was going to cover your shift because you clearly weren’t feeling well.

Hours passed with them at your side watching movies and when you were suddenly feeling better there was a loud knock on your door. Jungkook went to answer it before you could move and you couldn’t make out anything past muffled noises. Shortly after, a familiar face appeared at your door and Jungkook was letting Taenyung in without asking you first.

He didn’t say anything as he looked at you and you tried to hide behind Bora but she was standing up nervously, “Mr. Kim.”

Taehyung smiled stiffly and he turned to Jungkook who seemed to understand. “Come on Bora, I gotta go get ready for work anyway.”

“Y/n,” Taehyung finally said when it was just you two, “Baby, I’m sorry, I had no idea she would just show up like that and I really don’t want you to think I’m still involved with her. I’m not lying when I say you’re the only one I care about a—“

“It was so embarrassing,” you finally broke down now that your comfort person was here. Taehyung immediately went to your side, a pout on his face as he wrapped you in his arms. You were embarrassed to be caught in such a manner, like a dirty secret.

Hell, you weren’t even fully dressed and what if it had been anyone but Jihyun? A teacher? Another one of your classmates?

“I’m sorry,” Taehyung whispered into your ear and he really was. When you finally confronted Namjoon, he let it go. He hasn’t bothered you since and yet Jihyun just kept pushing and pushing. How could your relationship with Namjoon end more maturely than his with Jihyun? He never meant for you to get hurt.

“Does anyone know?” You asked with teary eyes and he wiped them away feeling his heart drop to his stomach painfully. He shook his head no, “No, I mean I don’t think so but please baby I won’t let her do anything to hurt you.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about,” you cried harder, “I just… well we both knew what we were getting ourselves into but I’ve never felt like such a…slut.”

“Don’t say that,” Taehyung said seriously, “Y/n, I love you.”

You looked at him with wide surprised eyes, “What?”

He didn’t back down from your gaze and with a softened voice he said, “I love you, and I’m not going to let anything happen to you. This isn’t just some secret that I’m ashamed to admit. I want to be open about our relationship, so please don’t think you mean less to me because of what happened. I wasn’t embarrassed to have the truth come out to Jihyun, I was mad that she was there when she shouldn’t have been.”

“Yeah but, what if she says something?” You asked, still unable to comprehend that he’s said he loves you twice already.

“Then I’ll quit, I’ll work somewhere else and trust me if the school finds out they’re not going to tell anyone. They’ll want it to remain quiet so the school doesn’t get hate from it. I'm not going to let it hurt you and I don’t want it to drive you away from me. You’ve been ignoring me and that hurt so much,” Taehyung said with a pout as he wiped another tear from you. You felt ridiculous for being so emotional when usually you’re the complete opposite.

Usually Taehyung had to ask you over and over again how you feel to get you to talk about whatever is on my mind yet right now you can’t seem to stop crying. You sniffled back some tears, “But we can’t be open about it. I still have a couple months before I graduate.”

“I know,” Taehyung said, “But I’ve sent in my resignation le—“

“What!?” You sat up and pushed away from him, “You said everything would be fine.”

“It will be, Y/n. I promise. I’ve gotten a lot of job offers from other people in the industry and they would easily take me and pay more. I was originally going to quit after the divorce but I didn’t. The only reason why I stayed the extra year is because I had some really good artist’s in their final year who I wanted to support,” Taehyung said and you knew one of them was you. The others probably included Seungjin and other classmates that Taehyung mentored but it was very clear right now he was talking about you.

“Anyway, I planned on leaving all along and even if Jihyun never says anything about us, I would still leave after you graduate,” Taehyung pet your hair soothingly, “And like I said I’m not going to let her ruin you if she’s tries to so please don’t cry anymore and please baby, please don’t ignore me or push me away.”

Nothing he said was a lie. The only reason why he never brought it up to you was because he didn’t need to. He knew you would be graduating and if your relationship lasted then he would tell you about his resignation once you were done with school. He just didn’t think he would have to tell you like this and make you think you’re the reason his career is about to change.

He waited an entire year to decide he wanted to quit teaching but it’s what he wanted to do all along. He enjoys it but he wants to start fresh… with you. He doesn’t want to have to listen to the opinion of others when the two of you become public.

“You love me?” You asked with the cutest set of puppy dog eyes he’s ever seen that it made his heart feel like it would burst. He nodded his head to answer your question and you sniffled, “I love you too.”

A small laugh in relief left his lips as he hugged you close making you whine about wetting his shirt with your stupid crying. You were so perfect to him. You were confident and forward yet deep down you were a crybaby and needy and loveable and he really did love you. He hugged you tighter in his arms.

“I know you hate it when I call you cute but you’re so fucking cute,” Taehyung said as he kissed your hair, “And I love you so much and I would never want to change the way we got together or make you feel like you’re not important to me because you are.”

He looked down at you with loving eyes, “And I don’t want to keep this a secret anymore.”

In the end Jihyun never told anyone. She figured she owed it to Taehyung after being so shitty the last few years. It had hurt her to watch him be happy with someone else but from the moment she saw you two at the restaurant she knew you made him happy. She couldn’t take that away from him after what she had done.

::.

ok yayyyy finallt part 2 is done. this is in fact the final part so pls understand. feel free to send in asks about them or drabbles

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@joyjunk @ohsweetmimosa @llallaaa @jjkliver7 @arosesstorm @taebaelove @youdonwantoknow @sl1pth0t @boxxkoo @jooniesxbby @saikikjin @screamertannie @starlostluvv @jksthiccthighs @kingarthurscat @roundbuttonsuga @kochycooky @heyhowyoudoin3 @jeonjk25 @Watermelonjuice15 @artmsmaid @shimisushi [the rest will be tagged in reblog ]

[lunarbuck]

Jane!! I'm so excited for you and your 1.5k followers! Thanks for letting me be part of the things. In an effort to help you pick back up with BFB!Bucky, do you think we can see some sexy times? Maybe early on when they're still keeping it a secret?

I'm sorry i've made you wait like over a year for anything from this AU 😭 I hope you enjoy this!!!

moodboard is for vibes only, not what reader looks like

Thinking This Through

pairing: bfb!buck x f!reader (any race)

wc: 1.7k

summary: A secret night with Bucky (from his POV)

warnings: secret relationship, fluff, pet names [pretty girl, baby, boo bear], oral (f receiving), smut (p in v), swearing

a/n: this part takes place before part 2 so it's technically out of order!! it's also in bucky's pov which was fun :)))

series masterlist | au playlist | my masterlist | 1.5k sleepover Title is a lyric from the 1975's song I'm in Love With You

I catch her eye from across the bar and find myself smirking into my beer. No matter where she is, no matter how many people are in the room, I always manage to find her. It’s like she fucking calls to me, a siren singing her beautiful song to lure me in.

Well fuck it, I don’t care if she’s a siren. I want her all to myself. 

Some girl slides up next to me, getting way too close for comfort, and batts her long eyelashes at me. “You wanna buy me a drink?” She asks, tossing her hair over her shoulder. I can tell she bleaches it too much; it looks fried. 

“Not really,” I reply, not caring to soften my tone for this girl. Maybe before I would’ve bought her one, maybe I would’ve entertained whatever this girl is trying to accomplish, but not anymore. Not since Becca’s gorgeous best friend turned my world upside down.

“You sure?” I feel the girl’s long, manicured fingers squeeze my arm, and I have to bite back the urge to tell her I’m taken. We’re not telling people yet. Neither of us are ready for the consequences of Becca finding out. 

“He’s sure,” Steve says, patting me on the back. The girl rolls her eyes as Steve shoos her away, but I don’t bother watching her leave. My eyes are back on the only girl I want to see tonight and every night.

She smiles at me brightly before her friend snags her attention again. Steve orders us another round as I text her. I want her with me tonight; I don’t care where we end up. I just want us together.

Bucky: You got plans after this, pretty girl?

Boo Bear: hm… i’m not sure yet

Bucky: Boo Bear? Really?

Boo Bear: i’m surprised it took you this long to notice

Bucky: anyways, i’ve decided you have plans we’re going home together in 20 minutes. 

Boo Bear: becca’s hanging out with ethan tonight, she said she won’t be home until after her class tomorrow morning

Bucky: perfect, see you in a few, boo bear

I try not to smile too hard at my phone, especially with Steve standing right next to me. He’s caught me practically kicking my feet while I text her way too many times. It’s becoming a problem at this point. 

Steve and I shoot the shit for a bit, and I pay my tab, shooting off another text to my girl, letting her know to meet me across the street. A few minutes later, I see her exit the crowded bar. She looks fucking fantastic, good enough to eat. Her jeans are tight in all the right places, and her top shows off enough skin to make my mouth water.

I never get over how perfect she looks, no matter what she wears or where we are. I don’t know how I held off for so long; I’m addicted now. 

“Hey, boo bear,” I whisper once she’s close enough. I tug her close and breathe her in, pressing a kiss to her neck. 

“Hey, Buck.”

The second the door shuts behind us, I’m on her. I press her against the wall, loving how soft she is against my body. Her hands grip my shirt, nails gently scraping against my chest. I kiss her deeply, tasting her.

“You’re gonna kill me, Buck,” she whispers, nipping at my lip. I dip my head, kissing along the soft skin of her neck as my hands trace down her body. I hook my arms under her legs and pick her up, wrapping her legs around my waist. 

“You got it all wrong, pretty girl. You’re gonna be the death of me.” I walk us to the couch and sit, positioning her on my lap, and she immediately grinds her hips against me, drawing a groan out of me. 

I tug at the bottom of her shirt until she lifts her arms, letting me pull it over her head, and I bite back a moan at the sight of her in just her bra and tight jeans. My lips immediately attack her collarbone, biting and nipping a trail down to her perfect tits.

She watches me, lips parted, as my hands find their way to her back, undoing the clasp on her bra. When I pull the garment away, she shivers, and I practically come in my goddamn pants. 

“I love when you look at me like that,” she whispers, fingers tugging at my hair. I take one of her nipples in my mouth, running my tongue over the bud. She gasps, gripping me tighter. 

While I tease her with my mouth, my left hand traces her skin, the metal cool against her heated body, and my right finds the button on her jeans.

“Pants. Off, Now,” I tell her.

“Ooh, Caveman Bucky is coming out to play,” she teases, standing on shaky legs to strip her jeans off. I shift until I’m sitting on the edge of the couch, my eyes level with her belly, and gaze up at her. 

She’d never believe her if I told her, but she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. 

I run my fingers along the band of her panties; she’s ticklish there, before I tug them down her legs. “You’re wearing too many clothes, Buck,” she tells me, reaching for my shirt. I let her pull it off of me, my jeans following soon after, and before I know it, I have her pressed into the couch with my head between her legs. 

I love the way she grips my hair, showing me exactly what she wants while I eat her out. My hips grind against the couch, seeking any sort of friction I can find. I work her up with my tongue and fingers, desperate to feel her come.

Her face twists up, and she makes these beautiful breathy sounds, and I know she’s close. “Come on, baby, come for me,” I practically grunt, circling her clit the way she likes.

She comes with my name on her lips, and I can’t help but smile, knowing I’m the one that gets to do this to her, the one that gets to have her like this. I shift off the couch and pick her up, carrying her to her room. 

I settle her onto the bed, kiss her until she’s breathless one more time, and run out into the main room to grab our clothes. We can never be too careful. Once I’m back, I pounce on her. I’m starving when it comes to my girl. I can never get enough.

“Please, Bucky,” she whines when I settle myself between her legs. She can feel how much I want her, how badly I’m aching for her, but I need her to beg a little more.

“Come on, baby,” I whisper. She knows what I want her to say.

“Fuck, Bucky, please fuck me.” I grin and sit up, watching her writhe on the bed. I fucking love her like this.

“You want me to fuck your pretty pussy?” I ask her, running my thumb over her sensitive clit. 

“Please, please, please,” she chants, giving in to the feeling. 

“Your wish is my command, baby.” I line my cock up with her and slowly press in, gritting my teeth at how tight she is. Once I’m fully inside her, I don’t move slow; I don’t give her much of a warning before I set a quick, deep pace.

I kiss her all over, needing to feel her everywhere. Her hands grip my back, scratching her nails against my skin, and I love that I’ll probably have marks tomorrow. Steve’ll probably give me shit, but I can’t wait. 

I lose myself in fucking her, in pouring myself into the beautiful girl below me. She’s blissed out, loving the pleasure I give her. I press deeply inside of her, making her moan. She clenches around me, and I know she’s close again.

I help her turn over, lifting her hips into the air. She settles her upper body onto the mattress, and I have to groan at how perfect she looks like this. Gripping her hips, I press back into her and fuck her, my dick hitting deeper inside her in this position. 

She’s a bumbling mess, moaning incoherently, and a sense of pride bubbles up in me. I know I won’t last much longer, so I reach around and find her clit again, bringing her back up to her peak.

“Come on, pretty girl.” She presses her hips against me, begging me to keep going. “I know you wanna come again; you wanna come all over my dick, don’t you?” She nods even though her face is pressed into the mattress.

“Yes, Bucky.”

“Then come for me, baby. I wanna see you come on my cock.” I fuck her harder, picking up the pace on her clit, and a few moments later, she comes hard, sending me over the edge right along with her. 

Together, we collapse onto the bed, and I pull her close, needing the skin to skin contact. I know I need to get up and grab a towel so I can clean her up, but right now, this is where I need to be. I need to be wrapped up in my girl.

As we’re catching our breath, I hear the front door click open, and the familiar sound of my sister’s voice rings loudly through the apartment. I roll my eyes as I stand, looking for my boxers. I look over at my girl and see her frantically searching for her phone. When she grabs it, she shows me a text from Becca saying that since Ethan’s roommate is home, they’re coming back here.

I stifle a laugh; we always have shit luck with this stuff. We settle back into bed and wait for Becca and Ethan to find their way into Becca’s room, but in the meantime, I enjoy cuddling with my beautiful girl.

I want to go public. I want to tell Becca. I hate all this secret stuff, even though it’s fun sometimes. Hopefully, she feels the same. I press a kiss to her forehead as she scrolls through her various social media apps and make sure she knows just how much I like being here with her.

please message me to be added to a taglist. must be 18+

general tags: @peaches1958 @pono-pura-vida @emi11ie @paulasocean @silverfire475 @lovingchoices14 @nekoannie-chan @late-to-the-party-81 @chibijusstuff @midnightramyeoncravings @wickidlady @buckyb-stan @adoreyouusugar

everything bucky tags: @peaches1958 @prettylittlepluviophile @writerwrites @w0nderw0mansw0rld @hawsx3 @meetmeatyourworst @harrysthiccthighss @goldylions @late-to-the-party-81 @luxeavenger @cloudyfeelin @searchf0rtheskyline @keliiiiiiii @urmom4130

series tags: @peaches1958 @prettylittlepluviophile @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @enchantedbarnes @writerwrites @beefybuckrrito @thatblackravenclaw @cloudyfeel @broco8 @searchf0rtheskyline @itsashleektchm @emmabarnes

[mvlders222]

hii, could you write about Natalie scatorccio and a reader with anxiety problems?

I know it's a sensitive topic and I will understand if you don't want to write about this.

(sorry if I don't express myself well, English is not my native language)

a/n; hi!! thank you for the request. i hope i wrote this well and to your liking. reader's gender is female. i have a handful of people in my life with clinical anxiety, but i also did my research before diving into this topic. if the way i describe these feelings isn't accurate, please let me know so i can edit/rewrite this fic.

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥

pairing ; natalie scatorccio x fem!reader

wordcount ; 1.1k

summary ; nat invites you to one more party, and you typically never accept. she reasons that this would be the last one before your guys’ flight tomorrow for nationals. this however doesn’t seem to go as planned…

warnings ; anxiety, overthinking, sorta angst to fluff, alcohol, underage drinking, mention of smoking (let me know if there's any more!)

You and Natalie had been dating for two months now. And you knew each other even earlier than that. But throughout your time knowing her, she had never not invited you to any event whether it be a smoke sesh or a bonfire.

And you had always turned her down. This wasn’t your way of rejecting her, but it wasn’t exactly your crowd. You could only conjure up the most ridiculous and almost impossible situations that would happen because you just showed up in a social setting.

Your guys’ first date in your backyard where you guys shared a pizza and your first kiss (probably not a good kiss with the pizza). The point was that it was in the privacy of your own home.

You know Nat would never force you to do anything you wouldn’t want to do. But considering how she felt going to these parties without you, you decided you finally show. So she came to your house minutes before the party to help you prepare.

There you stood in front of your mirror, Natalie behind you looking at your guys’ reflection. She had her hands on your shoulders and smiled at you through the mirror.

She was dressed in a leather jacket and worn in Doc Martins. She had a red pleated skirt and ripped fishnets and a plethora of rings adorned her fingers. She had smudged eyeliner around her eyes but it was meant to look like that.

You were simply wearing a long sleeve since it was chilled out. A pair of thrifted jeans that were your favorite pair, despite them already being worn.

“Are you ready?” She smiled at you and you nodded. She kissed your cheek and grabbed your hand to drag you out of your bedroom and your house.

It wasn’t a far walk, just further out into the woods so you both walked there, hand in hand.

“Have you ever been to one of these before?” Nat smirked. It wasn’t mean, it was a genuine question. “You just never wanna come with me when I offer.”

“Not really to any parties. I’ve been to the football games but I never have any fun there,” you shrugged. You were the type to stay in and enjoy a movie, rather than agree with people who speak in majority filler words. It was exhausting to try and find any way to talk to these people without absolutely crumbling.

“I thought it’d be nice though. Since we leave tomorrow,” you smiled. You looked at the dead leaves on the ground as the two of you walked together.

As you got closer and closer to the bonfire, you could see the light and hear a mix of chatter, laughter, and music. A heavy feeling started to settle in your stomach, but you tried to push it down because what would Nat think if you wanted to turn around?

When you started to catch up with people and run into the couples sucking faces, it was like a middle school dance. People were spread out across the woods, but no one was dancing to the music. All talking in their small groups, holding red solo cups full of something.

“I’m gonna go find a keg.” Natalie let your hand go and walked away from you, walking through different circles of people to find a buzz.

You tried following her, but her trail was too spontaneous. She would push people apart from each other, even when they were invested in a full-on conversation. She would split trees and walk through bushes.

So afraid of losing her, you weren’t paying attention to the others around you, mumbling different “sorry”s to several strangers. Maybe you had been paying too much attention to the people around you and that’s how you lost your girlfriend in the crowds.

You couldn’t ask anyone for help, they seemed to look at you like you snuck onto earth. Whether it was the anxiety or the plethora of circles you’d made searching for Natalie, your nausea was starting to set in.

Your stomach was tied in knots and you suddenly felt like you couldn’t move. Your breathing became shallow. The lights were too bright and the music was too loud, it was hard to even think in a setting like this.

An unexpected hand grasped at your shoulder and tugged you around. Trying not to fall over your own feet, you grabbed at anything physical in front of you.

Your eyes came into focus. “Natty!” You let out what felt like the last breath you’d ever take. You pulled her toward you in a great embrace. You felt a splash at your feet and arms wrap around you hesitantly.

“Baby, I’m so sorry,” she apologized earnestly. You both pulled away slightly. “I completely forgot and I feel like a complete jerk-“

“You dropped your beer,” you interrupted her. Your monotone made her smile and laugh. It was something so simple that didn’t compare to the situation that was happening.

“I hadn’t even noticed.” She smiled and pecked the corner of your lips. She looked down at your hand and held it gently with her own, toying with the tips of your fingers. Looking back up to meet your eyes, her face became soft. “Do you wanna go?”

You took a deep breath and looked at her as if she had confused you for someone else. “No, it’s okay! But if you wanna stay. I’ll just go–”

She quickly shushed you and held your face in her hands. “Shh, baby… I love you more than some… party.” She giggled at the situation.

“Are you sure? Have you even talked to your friends yet?” All of your questions made her shut you up again, pressing her lips to yours, trying to get you to stop mumbling into your kiss.

She pulled away and gave you a knowing look. You just replied with a small smile on your lips. Natalie furrowed her brows as she licked her lips once over. “Is that cherry?”

“Yeah, it came in, like, a pack of four.” You giggled in response to her behavior.

“That gives us one more reason to leave,” She moved her hands to grab yours, pulling you away from the rest of the party. “We have to try all of them. If they’re as good as they taste, ya know.”

[bardsources]

𝕤𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕣𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕤 : 𝕣𝕖𝕥𝕙 [ 𝕡𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕒 ]

❝ What can I do you for? ❞ ❝ What brings you over to this neck of the village? ❞ ❝ Funny seeing you here.. or not funny at all, since you live here too. ❞ ❝ You do know talking to me this much is going to give you a bad reputation right? ❞ ❝ You can never go wrong with soup! ❞ ❝ Couldn't get enough of my charm, huh? ❞ ❝ There’s the face I keep seeing in my dreams. ❞ ❝ Prepare to be dazzled. ❞ ❝ Oh, you’re into bad boys aren’t you? ❞ ❝ I was just thinking about you… But not in a creepy way! ❞ ❝ You missed me? I missed you. ❞ ❝ I…still don't think I'm good for you. ❞ ❝ Can we just… pretend I said something poetic? ❞ ❝ You almost make me want to stop my life of crime. ❞ ❝ Wait, you don't mind people seeing us together? ❞ ❝ Good idea, leave before the rumours start. ❞ ❝ Try not to cry too much without me. ❞ ❝ You are gonna miss me so much. ❞ ❝ You know I’m still here, right? ❞ ❝ Shh, our scandalous liaison must come to an end. ❞ ❝ I'm glad you gave me a chance. ❞ ❝ I hope you don't realize I'm a mistake once you leave! ❞ ❝ You always make me feel less… terrible. ❞ ❝ Don't wanna make things weird, but, uh, I'll miss you. ❞ ❝ And I thought I was the only troublemaker in town. ❞ ❝ It’d be a lot easier to relax if I didn’t feel like I’m always being watched. ❞ ❝ I hope my wish comes true real soon! Like, tomorrow. ❞ ❝ Bugs! I hate bugs! Like, do they have to… wriggle so much?? ❞ ❝ You have got one twisted sense of humor, my friend. ❞ ❝ I don’t actually have anything witty to say, shockingly enough. ❞ ❝ Is it a food? Is it a drink? No one knows! ❞ ❝ One of these days, I just might tell you where I go at night. ❞ ❝ Wow, look at me. Making smart decisions about my emotional health. ❞ ❝ Do you like my tattoos? ❞ ❝ I’m just a regular guy with no weird affiliations with anything… except soup. ❞ ❝ Besides, there’s nothing wrong with easy. Lots of good things are easy! Walks on the beach, cheese sandwiches, me. ❞ ❝ Some ingredients you just measure by heart. Like garlic. Two cloves? Pfft. Six, minimum. ❞ ❝ You know what I’m looking for in a relationship? Someone who looks past my sparkling personality and sees what’s really important… my outward appearance. ❞ ❝ You know that sunset's not the only thing around here that's beautiful. I mean… There's also me. ❞ ❝ Ya know, you've seen one sacred moon, you've seen 'em all. ❞ ❝ I'm feeling super groggy today. Even the bags on my eyes are tired. ❞ ❝ I guess… I've always had a hard time opening up to people. ❞ ❝ I mean, trusting people with what I've trusted you with, it's kind of a big burden to put on anybody. ❞ ❝ You know, I'm going to assume you're spending all this time with me just because you like my company. ❞ ❝ Now, of course, I'm a no-good untrustworthy scoundrel. So, it's quite possible I'm lying. ❞ ❝ What am I supposed to do now? Plan for my future?? Start a savings account??? Yeah, right. ❞ ❝ I'm not jealous, I know how to share. ❞

[kfkr1ze]

[002-A21] Carpe Diem

Summary — ✈︎ Kaede feels frustrated about the fact that he couldn’t be a good teacher to the rest of the students. However, after being encouraged by Sakujiro, he decides try to do what he can. 

Characters— ✈︎ Akuta, Muneuji, Nanaki, Ushio, Sakujiro

(Egg tapping)

Muneuji: ……take. Isotake.

Akuta: ……Hn?

Location: Otomari Chuuzaemon Inn in Shodoshima

Muneuji: If you fall asleep standing up here, you’ll catch a cold.

Akuta: I wasn’t sleeping. The egg is making a sound, so I’m just trying to focus on hearing it. Also, you’re way too late on coming back y’know.

Muneuji: My apologies. I made you worry.

Akuta: What were you doing up til now?

Muneuji: I went on the 88 Temple Pilgrimage[1].

Akuta: Oh… You just effortlessly challenged the 145 km long and grueling pilgrimage… You must have an unlimited supply of physical strength & a spirit made of steel huh〜

Muneuji: Not quite. I had to stop abruptly since the sun was already setting. I wanted to see everything, butーー

I couldn’t find anything that could help. … I’m sorry.

Akuta: ………

Fufufu.

Y’know, we don’t need to ask the Gods to give us anything. ‘Cuz we already have been given something. I’ll leave it at that for now.

Muneuji: ?

Akuta: Just have some faith. There’ll be a plot twist in our story.

Kaede: Aah… I can’t take this anymore…!

Just what the hell are the students thinking!? Don’t you think this kind of treatment is way too cruel!?

Sakujiro: For the sake of clarification, that can that you are drinking out of is beer that does not contain any alcohol, correct Chief?

Kaede: That’s right, what of it!?

Sakujiro: Nothing, I had no particular intentions with that question.

Andーー As for the weather tomorrow, there is nothing that could be done about it.

When researching the place to hold this study tour, we heard that this area receives little rain. It was truly an unfortunate turn of events that it will rain on the day of the event.

Kaede: … I know that. But.

(In the end, none of the students showed up for dinner tonight.)

(We could check where they are by GPS, so I’m not particularly worried butーー)

(Everything just fell apart right before the actual event… In the end, this is all my fault.)

(I get that, but… What else could I have possibly done?)

(I couldn’t even encourage Akuta-kun properly. Maybe I’m just not fit to be in charge of other people.)

(If I think like thatーー)

If I think like that, I’ll never be a good teacher…!

Sakujiro: Please calm yourself. You are not a teacher, but a tour conductor.

Sakujiro: What a poor thing. It seems as if your mind is becoming muddled. 

Kaede: Y-Yeah, you’re right… Sorry.

Sakujiro: Now, please take this. Please drink some water and gather yourself a bit.

Kaede: Thank you…

Sakujiro: ………

Kaede: You’re right about the fact that I’m a tour conductor, not a teacher. But, to those 5, I’m more older and mature than themーー

So… I was planning on teaching them a lot of different things. But in the end, I ended up learning a lot from them instead.

I didn’t do a good job in this role at all… I’m really ashamed. 

Sakujiro: ………

To live a life without failure… Would be a truly boring life.

Kaede: Eh?

Sakujiro: In a life where you have never stumbled, and without any ups and downs… That is a life without many big emotional attachments. 

In order to truly feel proud and cathartic about an accomplishment, you must first feel that feeling of “failure”ーー

That is a talent in itself, I believe.

Kaede: ………

(He’s wearing such a kind expression… I think he’s trying to encourage me.)

(That’s right… If things don’t turn out the way you want, it’s okay.)

(It’s okay if everything isn’t absolutely perfect…)

You’re right… Whatever the outcome ends up being, I’ll have to accept it.

I’ll be able to accept it after I try absolutely everything I can possibly do…!

Sakujiro: Where are you heading, at this time?

Kaede: I’m going to KOBE for a bit!

Kaede:

I’m gonna go and see if I can borrow the weather controlling device from the special tourist district!

Sakujiro: At this moment? But, as of right now, there are not any ways to get off the islandーー

Kaede: I’ll figure something out!

This is a preparation period so that we can feel cathartic one day… Hearing you say that really lifted a weight off my shoulders. Thank you.

Looking more into the future instead of focusing on the present made me feel a little better. Butーー

I think that’s something we can say just because we’re older. 

When you’re a kid, summers like this pass by before you know itーー This is something they can only experience once.

As the outside club instructor, and as the Tourism Chief of HAMA Tours, it’s my job to make sure to provide the best frame for these 16 year olds’ summer memories!

Sakujiro: ーーChief…

Kaede: Please don’t try to stop me!

Sakujiro: No, I have no intention on attempting to stop you.

Kaede: Eh?

Sakujiro: ーー The last ferry.

My serious driving skills will be able to get you there with no qualms.

Ushio: Ah.

Nanaki: …… Ah.

Ushio: ………

Nanaki: (Ugh, we bumped into each other with awful timing… This is so awkward. I should’ve waited longer before coming out.)

(Actually, why am I the one worrying about this? … This is such a pain in the ass.)

(Just as I thought, it’s so much easier being by myself…)

Sakujiro: Everyone, good morning.

Nanaki: Morning…

Ushio: … Do you know where Muneuji went?

Sakujiro: He already left earlier. Together with Isotake-kun.

Ushio: … Ah, I see.

It’s real impressive that they have so much energy. Considering it’s all gonna go to shit in the end anyways.

Nanaki: Saku-chan-sensei, what about Kinugawa-kun?

When I woke up this morning, he was already gone.

Sakujiro: He had already made his way to the Atelier early this morning.

I believe that Gannosuke-san is assisting him in decorating the rest of the lanterns. 

Which leaves you both.

Nanamegi-kun’s job today is to set up the sound equipment, and Kurama-kun’s job is to help set up the food stallsーー

Today is the day of the festival. It will be a very busy day, so hurry along and get ready.

Ushio: Ahh, yeah yeah.

Sakujiro: One “yes” is sufficient. 

Ushio: Yes sir…

Nanaki: ………

Nanaki: …… It’s really nice out today.

Today, seriously…

Are you really planning on making it rain today…? …God…

Previous — ✈︎ Masterlist — ✈︎ Next

Notes — ✈︎

Shodoshima has an 88 Temple Pilgrimage! If I just made Muneuji say “I visited the 88 temples” I felt it wouldn’t be that clear what he was doing LMFAO

[ericsprincess]

take your time and turn off the lights

nc-17, Choi Chanhee/Reader, drunk sex, sexual exploration, fingering

~~~

Your best friend wants some education. 

~~~

“Can you please get a move on finally? I’m gonna pee myself,” whines Chanhee, leaning on the wall outside of your apartment, while you’re bent over in front of the door. You’re squeezing the key between your fingers, if only the keyhole stopped dodging. Chanhee is being of no help, well, except the fact that he’s holding your bag and heels in one hand, his bedazzled Hello Kitty vape in the other and has a dumb remark on everything. 

You’re both drunk, coming home from your monthly besties night out. It is a years long tradition for you and your best friend - on the first Friday of every month, you both doll up at your place, while sharing a bottle of wine, trying out outfits and putting on makeup. Then you hit up a club, both with no money on you - the objective is to just dance, have fun and let men pay for your drinks. But neither one of you intends to pick up a man to go home with - you can do that any other time, but this is an evening just for the two of you. So you stick together and leave the club together when you’re tired, crashing at either of your places for a sleepover. 

Today, you picked a club that’s closer to your place, that’s why you’re currently fighting with the lock on your apartment door. You had a really good night, you danced your shoes off, both with Chanhee and various hot men that caught your attention. Chanhee did the same, and judging by how drunk you both are, you both got plenty of attention (and free drinks) tonight. Maybe even a bit too much - at some point, Chanhee suddenly stopped dancing and dragged you off the dance floor to one of the sofas scattered around it and pulled you to chill down on it. As you were catching your breath from the dancing, you looked up at Chanhee with a question in your eyes. 

“There was a guy, I didn’t like how he was looking at you,” he explained. Ohhh. Makes sense. You haven’t noticed anyone, so you were glad Chanhee was looking out for you. 

“Wanna make out to make him jealous?” asked Chanhee and you nodded, giggling, since you are always up for mischief like that. Chanhee smiled at you, you closed your eyes and seconds later you were tasting sweet cocktails on his tongue. You spent a lot of time just making out, enjoying the alcohol buzz, loud music and the warmth of another body. 

Now you’ve finally managed to open the door to your apartment, almost falling over when the lock unexpectedly clicked. You throw your jacket on the hanger, while Chanhee yells “Dibs on the bathroom!” and immediately runs there. You snort and go to the kitchen to make both of you a cup of tea to sober up a bit. 

You bring the cups to your room, while you hear the shower running. Chanhee has been to your place a million times, so he’s here like at home and doesnt need to be treated as a guest. You start taking off your clothes, preparing for your own shower, while sipping on the tea. You take off your makeup and just at the time you hear the shower being turned off. 

“I left you some hot water, because I’m that nice,” Chanhee walks out of your bathroom in your fluffiest bathrobe (that’s actually yours, not for guests), drying his hair with a towel. “Also I used your shampoo and it’s really good, so if you are missing the bottle tomorrow, don’t ask me about it.”

He looks up at you and stops in his tracks. “Oh, you’re already undressed.” He looks you up and down. “Nice lingerie. Did you plan to pull? You should have told me,” he asks, but his tone is strange.

“No, I just felt like dressing up,” you reply and hand him his cup. “Here is your tea.”  

“Thank you. Do you want to watch something or are we just going to sleep?” he asks.

You take a second to consider the options. You are ok with watching something, but you’re so tired from dancing and alcohol, you will probably drop 5 minutes into the movie. It’s been a long evening. 

“Up to you. But I am probably falling asleep very soon,” you laugh. 

You leave him in your room and go take a shower. The hot water falling over you is soothing and it makes you want to sleep even more. You quickly wash and dry yourself so you can run to bed. 

When you enter your room, Chanhee is already laying in your bed under the covers, scrolling on his phone. You drop your towel, looking for some panties and pyjamas. You’re never shy around your best friend and it’s not the first time you’re naked around him, so you don’t pay it any attention. He’s focused on his phone anyways. 

Finally, you find some clothes and get into the bed, poking Chanhee to budge so you can fit next to him, warm and cozy under the covers. You lie down and you feel so comfortable - alcohol buzz pleasantly ebbing off, you’re freshly showered and finally in your bed, even next to another warm body, which always makes you sleep better. 

Chanhee puts down his phone on the nightstand, turns to your side, huddles close and hugs you from behind. A bit unusual since he’s not big on cuddling, but you’re not complaining - you would not refuse any additional comfort now. 

“Hmmm..you still drunk?” you mumble into his arm. 

“Not as much..you?” he asks. 

“Less, too… But I’m really sleepy,” you reply, accompanied by a yawn. You fidget a bit to burrow deeper into his arms.

“We had a nice evening, didn’t we?” Chanhee asks, silently. His free hand, the one you’re not lying on with your head, is laid on your waist, petting you gently. He moves it to lightly rub over your belly. 

“Hmm..yeah,” you’re not even thinking much over the reply. You really did, as always. It’s not even a question. 

“You looked really pretty today,” he continues. “Actually, you always look really pretty. It made me realize a lot of things, lately..”

“Like what?” you mumble, already half-asleep. 

Chanhee hesitates. He slowly moves his hand up under your pyjamas, over your naked breasts.

That wakes you up. 

“Chanhee?” you ask, confused. You can feel his quickening breath. 

“Can I?” he asks, without any explanation. And maybe that’s okay - maybe you don’t need one. Maybe the explanation would not change your answer anyways. 

“Yeah,” you breathe out, almost shivering in anticipation. You’re not quite sure what you’re agreeing to, but it’s your best friend and you know you can trust him with anything. If he wants to explore your body, he’s welcome to do so. 

Chanhee slowly rubs his hand over your tits, feeling up your hardening nipples with his fingers. He squeezes one of your breasts, then the other and goes back to playing with your nipples, until they are fully hard. He pinches one and it makes you wiggle, since you’re too sensitive, and you put a hand over his to let him know. He understands immediately and lets it go, circling his finger around it in apology. 

Letting your breasts go, Chanhee moves his hand higher, running the tips of his fingers along your collarbones. He leans his head a bit forwards and kisses your neck. You sigh in content. 

You’re starting to get aroused from the touching, feelings emphasized by the alcohol. Everything feels hot, Chanhee’s body behind you, his hand on your body, even his breath on your neck and you don’t have enough self-control to fight it. 

And it seems you’re not alone in this. You shift a little and that makes you bump into his hard cock with your ass so you push against it a bit and he gets the hint and moves closer. He’s not humping you, but you still like feeling his hard cock press against you insistently.

And you also really like to know that he likes it, that just touching your body makes him this hard.

Chanhee, however, ignores his erection and focuses on kissing and sucking hickeys onto your neck, while moving his hand under your pyjamas, touching, groping where he can reach and you’re getting so wet from it, you’re slowly losing your mind. You’re breathing heavily and you’re holding onto his other hand that’s embracing you. 

It’s almost torture, but you’re not going to ask him for anything. You want him to go at his own pace and if that means he might not want to do more than what he is doing right now, then you’re okay with that. Even though your panties are completely soaked. 

Thankfully, you’re in luck tonight. Chanhee’s hand moves downwards, brushing past your belly. His fingers stop at the waistband of your pyjama pants. 

“Can I?” he asks.

“Yeah,” you breathe out impatiently. “Please, touch me..”

“But,” he hesitates. “Y/N… I-I’ve never… I don’t know if it will be any good...”

“It doesn’t matter,” you put your hand over his and push it under your pants and panties. “I’ll help you, if you need it.” you reassure him. 

Just the warmth and touch of his hand over your pussy is heavenly. He slowly feels around, pushing two fingers between the lips and finding out how wet you are. Maybe you are imagining it, but you would swear his breath hitches. 

He slowly rubs up and down, spreading your slick all over your pussy, making his fingers glide over your skin easily. He quickly finds your clit and gently rubs it, and it feels so good you whine at him to not stop. You’re even moving your hips a little to make it easier for him. 

He’s being gentle but firm, rubbing your clit in steady tempo, nothing quick and brutish like other men use to. Your orgasm is slowly building up and you know if he continues, you could come like this. 

Inexperienced? Maybe, but definitely attentive. 

But before you can actually get too close to coming, Chanhee has other plans. He shifts his hand further, touching around your hole, fingers right at the opening. 

“Please,” he breathes out into your neck, where his face is still firmly put, no doubt all red and aroused himself. 

You just hum in agreement, too out of it to speak, and he pushes two fingers in and whines. You realize that now his hips are really moving against yours, rubbing his cock on your ass as he’s trying to get at least some relief. 

He pulls them out and pushes back in and repeats it few more times, trying to fuck you like that, but the angle is not great in this position and he seems to realize that too. He can’t go too deep nor too fast like that. He lets the idea go and pulls them out definitely to get back to rubbing your clit and you’re almost thanking him. 

And now that he’s getting the hang of things, you can tell he’s not playing anymore. He’s rubbing your clit with perfect pressure and good tempo, clearly with the sole aim to get you off. 

You’re moving with him, barely realizing it, just giving into the feeling. You’re starting to whimper and moan as you’re getting closer and he quickens the tempo, not wavering even though his hand must be starting to hurt at this point. 

When you finally come it hits you like a truck, you’re almost spasming and he has to hold you firmly against himself as he keeps rubbing you. He slows down only when he sees your orgasm is finally ending, not wanting to overstimulate you. 

You blink, suddenly getting hit by reality. You would have never expected tonight ending this way, getting fingered and gotten off by your best friend, you think while catching your breath. 

But it’s not like you’re complaining, not in the least.

You put your hand behind yourself, on his hard cock leaking through the pyjamas, but he stops you. 

“Not now,” he says. 

“Tomorrow, if you still want to. When we’re sober.”

“Okay,” you nod and turn back so he can spoon you again. Now it’s a bit awkward, since neither knows what to say and you can feel his boner pressing against your ass. But at least, your tiredness is finally overcoming you, especially after having an orgasm. You yawn again. 

 “Let’s go to sleep?” 

“Okay…Good night Y/N,” he burrows his nose into your hair and holds you tight.

“Good night, Chanhee,” you close your eyes.

A minute passes in silence. 

“Thank you,” he whispers. 

And then you sleep. 

[imzadi-caskett-huddy]

It Started With a Kiss (1/?)

This idea came to me while watching “Knockdown.” Initially it was just gonna be a one-shot; however, lying in bed after watching the episode, I was struck with the idea that there should be several parts, at least covering a couple of episodes through the end of season 3. I’m not sure if I will extend it into some of the season 4 episodes or not…it just depends on how the characters speak to me as I’m writing. But there are at least several season 3 episodes that are going to be dealt with.

I’m starting it after that night in “Knockdown” when they had to save Ryan and Esposito. I figure Kate didn’t go to see Lockwood in prison until at least the next day, so this chapter will take place between the time we see her fixing Castle’s hand in the ambulance and when we see her at the prison.

The way I’m planning to deal with future chapters is everything up to the point I tell you the scene starts is going to be just like in the episode. The only parts I’m either rewriting or adding are what you see here. If anything else from an episode needs to change so that it fits my version, I’ll let you know in the beginning.

I’m also still working on Hell Hath No Fury, so I’m going to do my best to rotate updates between that and this one until this one is complete.

I don’t own Castle, unfortunately.

xxxxx

Castle is seated in the back of an ambulance getting his hand wrapped; he'd insisted he didn't need to go to the hospital. Once the medic finished, he climbed out of the vehicle. Castle winced at the tightness of the bandage and started to unwrap it, glancing up when he felt Beckett’s presence.

“Hey there, Chuck Norris. How’s the hand?” she asked, climbing up into the ambulance and taking a seat across from him with a small smile.

“Excruciating.”

She gently took his hand in hers and began rewrapping his hand. Her touch was delicate as she focused on his injury, her fingers caressing his skin softly.

“How’s Ryan and Esposito?” he asked her, trying to focus on anything but the way her soft touch was making him feel. After the kiss they shared earlier in the evening, the last thing he needed was more of her touch. As it was, he would have a very difficult time getting to sleep later, and he was sure the way she felt in his arms, the way she’d tasted when she kissed him back would monopolize his dreams for a few nights at least.

“Mild hypothermia, wounded pride. Guess which one will heal first?” she finished up with his hand and looked up at him with a smile. “Thank you, for having my back in there,” she said with a soft look in her eyes.

He gave her a smile. “Always,” he promised her.

She gently touched his knee to help her balance for a moment so she could hop down from the ambulance. She turned back to offer him her hand to help steady himself as he climbed down as well, keeping his good hand for a few moments longer than necessary once he was on his feet in front of her. “We’re pretty much wrapped up here for the night; I can finish up everything tomorrow,” she started. “I was going to offer to buy you a drink seeing as you saved my ass in there, but it’s pretty late to go to a bar. Can I offer you a drink at my apartment instead?”

“I’d like that,” he answered her with a grin. He’d take anything she’d offer him these days, and since she’d already told him earlier that Josh was in Africa, he was more than happy to keep her company after the case they’d had; at least he’d be able to pretend she wasn’t with the doctor for an hour or so.

“Alright,” she smiled. “Come on, Castle,” she nudged his shoulder lightly with hers, gesturing for him to follow her back to her car.

The ride back to her apartment was pretty much in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. She couldn’t get the kiss they’d shared out of her head. It was supposed to be fake, a ruse to distract the guard so that she could take him out. The problem was it hadn’t felt fake to her at all, from either of them.

She knew Castle well enough by now and trusted him enough to know he genuinely hadn’t meant anything by kissing her at first; he had just been improvising when his initial plan hadn’t worked. But the way it felt when his lips covered hers, even as innocent as it had been initially, set her entire body on fire in a way she’d never felt before…it certainly never felt like that when she kissed Josh. Then she thought of the way he’d jumped on Lockwood and literally beat him senseless with his bare hands to save her, and she suddenly wasn’t sure that asking him back to her apartment for a drink at this time of night had been her best idea.

He’d told his mother a couple of days ago when this case had started that it wasn’t about the books anymore. His need to be her partner, to continue to risk his life to be by her side had nothing to do with research and everything to do with her. His mother had been right in telling him it was time he was honest with himself about why he was doing it. He only wished he could be honest with Beckett about his motive as well.

He’d come close to telling her earlier in her apartment when she asked him why he kept coming back, but he’d chickened out; this case, anything related to her mother’s case, made her

vulnerable. He didn’t want to be the jackass that added to her problems by being selfish; besides, she had a boyfriend, so he highly doubted she would return his sentiments.

But now instead of going home alone, she had asked him to join her for a drink at her apartment where they would be alone. That had to mean she felt something, right? And she had kissed him back earlier; sure, it was under the ruse of a fake kiss. But fake kisses didn’t require her tongue in his mouth, didn’t require her moaning or her hands in his hair or her body pressed against his quite so tightly.

“Come on, Castle,” she said softly, once she parked her car on the street near the front of her building, which she was allowed to do because of her police plates.

Her voice shook him out of his thoughts, and he got out and followed her inside. The elevator ride remained quiet, as did the walk down the hallway to her apartment.

“Make yourself comfortable,” she told him, closing and locking the door behind them. She moved to her kitchen and grabbed a couple of glasses as well as a bottle of whiskey. She carried it over to the living room where he had made himself comfortable on her sofa and sat them down on the coffee table in front of it. Taking a seat, she poured a half a glass for each of them and clinked her glass against his. “To the best partner a girl could ask for,” she smiled, downing about half the liquid in her glass.

Her words made him grin and his eyes light up as he downed about half the liquid in his own glass as well. “Really?”

She nodded. “Except he doesn’t really help with paperwork,” she teased, setting her glass on the table and standing. “I’m going to change, I’ll be right back,” she told him, disappearing into her room.

He grinned a little more, pretty satisfied with himself at the moment, and finished the liquid in his glass before pouring himself a refill from the bottle. He leaned back into the cushions and relaxed, enjoying the drink in his hands as he waited for her to return.

It didn’t take long for Beckett to change her clothes. She’d remained in her jeans, only opting to change out of her work shirt into a more casual and comfortable t-shirt, and she’d removed her heels and placed her gun and badge in her nightstand. She offered him a smile as she rejoined him on the couch, taking her glass and curling her legs up comfortably as she turned her attention to him.

Almost an hour and a half later, he had her laughing hard as he told her a story about his mother. He was a couple of drinks ahead of her; he hadn’t drunk enough to not know what he was doing or saying, but he had definitely drunk enough to be looser and braver with his words and

feelings. He stopped laughing and got quiet for a moment, getting serious. “You know, you asked me why I keep coming back. I told you it’s because I’m your plucky sidekick…but that’s not entirely true,” he started softly.

She stopped laughing when she realized he was getting serious. His words had her finishing what was left of the alcohol in her glass and placing it on the table. She hadn’t had as much to drink as he had, and she’d always been great at holding her liquor. She was relaxed and loose, but she wasn’t sure if she’d had enough whiskey to handle where he was taking their conversation; then again, maybe it was better that she hadn’t had any more than she'd had at this point. She wasn’t sure yet. “Castle…” she tried to stop him.

“A wise woman told me that I should be honest with myself about why I’m doing this," he started, echoing the words of his mother from a few days ago. "She pointed out to me that I wrote 22 novels before I met you, and didn’t have to spend every day in a police station. It’s not about the research anymore. It hasn’t been about the books for a long time. Even Vulcan Simmons saw it, Kate.”

“Rick…” she tried to get his attention, to stop him before they went down this road. She hadn’t had a chance to process everything from the last few days, much less the kiss they’d shared earlier, the way he’d so bravely saved her life, or her own feelings about him and what it all meant. She certainly was not in a position to deal with everything tonight after 3 glasses of whiskey, despite the fact that she wasn’t drunk.

He placed his empty glass on the table as well and shifted closer to her. “So if I’m being honest with myself about why, I want to give you an honest answer too,” he said softly, drawing a deep breath. “It’s because I’m in love with you, Kate,” he continued in the same soft voice. “I keep coming back, I keep showing up to murder scenes in the middle of the night and hanging around because I love you.”

His words made her freeze; not only had he said them once…oh no…Castle was an overachiever and said them twice. She knew he’d had a couple more drinks than her, but she also knew that he wasn’t drunk enough to not know what was coming out of his mouth. This wasn’t a drunk confession that he wouldn’t remember tomorrow.

She had no idea how to respond to them. She cared for him; she knew she felt more than friendship for him, but she had a boyfriend. Even without dating Josh to complicate things, he’d ended things with Gina only a couple of weeks prior, and now he was here professing his feelings for her? It was making her head spin.

Why couldn’t he have had this epiphany back in May when she was trying to tell him she liked him? Why couldn’t he have just not asked Gina to go to the Hamptons immediately after she’d turned him down? Why hadn't he given her a little time to reconsider, or even gone alone? Now

there were 8 months of…complicated and significant others…between them.

Before she even knew what was happening, his lips were on hers, soft and tentative. After only a couple of seconds, she placed a hand on his chest, pushing him back slightly. “Castle…I can’t do this tonight…” she murmured.

He sighed and hung his head. “I’m sorry…” he immediately began to apologize.

Her hand on his arm stopped him. “You don’t have to apologize,” she told him softly, standing and pulling him to his feet. “But it is late. And you’ve had enough to drink.” She decided playing it off as the alcohol would keep things from getting weird between them; at least that's what she hoped.

“I’m not drunk, Beckett,” he told her, wondering if that’s why she had stopped him.

“Maybe not. But you’ve had enough whiskey to kiss me, which I know you wouldn’t have done without the alcohol, so it’s time for you to go home.” She began to gently guide him towards her front door, grabbing his jacket along the way.

“I kissed you earlier without alcohol,” he tried to reason.

She shook her head. “It was fake, Castle...a distraction to get past the guard.”

“Didn’t feel completely fake to me,” he pointed out.

She sighed softly, handing him his coat at the door. “Castle, it's late.” She opened her door for him and gave him a small smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow, ok?”

He sighed deeply. Her rejection had been gentle, but it still stung. “Goodnight, Kate,” he said softly, leaving her apartment.

She closed the door behind him, locking it, before leaning back against it and closing her eyes. What the hell had just happened between them? She had known he was attracted to her, but his confession had completely taken her by surprise. And while she knew she definitely felt something for him other than physical attraction, she had a boyfriend...a safe boyfriend...whom she might be able to love if she just stayed with him. She had no idea if she was ready to risk her heart with him; he’d already broken it once in May. She’d already ended one relationship to be with him and gotten burned. She wasn’t so sure she was ready to do that again.

Castle rested his head against the wall of the elevator as he rode down, telling himself he’d been an idiot for confessing his feelings like that. “What did you think was going to happen? She has a boyfriend, you idiot...she isn't the type of woman to cheat on her boyfriend for you,” he

murmured to himself. Maybe she was right, and he had had too much to drink; he was sure he wouldn’t have thought to confess his love for her…or kiss her…without the liquid courage he’d had.

When the cold January air hit his face as he walked outside, he suddenly realized what word she'd used. Tonight. She’d told him she couldn’t do this tonight. That left him with hope that maybe she wanted to do this one day. She didn’t say never, after all. She had been nice about letting him down. She hadn’t shot him…or even smacked him…when he’d kissed her. She had simply said she couldn’t do this tonight.

He decided then…he would wait, he would fight for her. Maybe not in a completely obvious way, and definitely not in a physical way because he was sure she wouldn’t like that. But he would be there; he’d keep showing up for her. That was already one thing he had over Josh…he wasn’t halfway around the world when she needed someone. He was actually there. And he would be there for her whenever she let him be. She may have been dating another man, but she didn’t have a ring on her finger yet; she didn’t seem as committed to Josh as he’d thought...she still told him things she didn't confide in her boyfriend, like the murder board she kept hidden in her apartment; he still had hope. And in the meantime, he wouldn't be stupid enough to start dating other women; he would wait for her.

xxxxx

Alright, that’s the first chapter. Hopefully you guys like this one. It will get to Castle and Beckett happiness, trust me. You’re just gonna have to go on the journey with me.

As always, I love hearing feedback if you feel so inclined! Thanks for reading!

[yakultii]

today was so wild it went from being so extremely shitty and thinking I wasn’t getting out of bed to then extremely grateful because I turned my day around and was glad to be alive to then nearly being bashed on a bus lmao nothing went to plan today and I didn’t end up getting my banh mi because I ate a brekky burger right before I left (and also I went in the opposite direction to the place I was gonna eat from) but positives of today are that I went to chadddy (biggest shopping centre (aka mall for international moots) in not just aus but the southern hemisphere if you didn’t know except it’s also my local like 10mins away) and I bought a few random useful bits and bobs from miniso and daiso <33 and I also bought a few random drinks from a supermarket in the shopping centre cause I’d never seen said drinks before and one thing about me I love trying one off random drinks and then I came home and FaceTimed one of my brothers and marinated some tempeh for tomorrow cause apparently I’m in my cooking era which is extremely suss of me???? (but I’m sure it’ll die off in a week when uni is back) but it’ll be interesting to see how it tastes tomorrow in a stirfry - the marinade was basically honey soy & garlic (I don’t follow recipe bc my adhd brain could never so I just make it up myself but I also wanna experiment w this a bit over next few days and come up w the perfect marinade I reckon) also did a random face mask and hair mask and ate lotsa meals ofc.. I do however wish I drank a little more water but it’s only like 8pm there’s still time!!!! I can’t believe tomorrow is Monday (last week before uni classes are back), I think tomorrow’s goals are to cook the mince in my fridge I bought for burritos to freeze and to try the tempeh in a stir fry also and to drink more water and maybe go for a walk cos I didn’t really do that today other than in the shopping centre which honestly counts bc I always get lost tryna find my way out despite having been there 99449483722 times bc I am directionally challengedlol… anyways, as a whole I feel like this exact same day I would have said was shit or mid at most in the mindset I was in before I started my daily positive things tag cos inevitably w my health rn there is a shit element in every day but I’m slowly shifting my mind to realise that’s an element of the day (though it does infiltrate all of it in a way Ssshh) and there are many other elements and actually I’m not mad that I’m here for the good elements.. I’m also like allowing myself to partake in the good elements which has been a little unexpected!! still as isolated as ever and hate the cold but so far this winter is feeling more manageable than ever before!! (maybe bc I’m not trying to come off a certain med like I try to this time every year even tho I so desperately want to but like extreme insomnia is the result of that and ruins eberything so idk if wanna risk it rn ahhhhh) I know it’s not much for a lot of ppl but I feel like I’m doing so much(for me) than this time last year and the year before and many years before when I couldn’t even get myself out of bed let alone do more than one task (I really hope I can keep this going when uni is back) ok imma quit yappin now

[frikatilhi]

Something where the joker out guys are sick of Bojan and Jere pining for each other and being totally oblivious so they scheme to get them together/admit their feelings/kiss whatever. I'm not sure exactly how they can do that but maybe someone else has an idea for some sneaky plans or how to trick them into a situation

Hello, dear anon! First, may I interest you in this (eventual) Jance fic by @ana-chronista that seems to have potential for this trope for Bojan/Jere. It's funny :)

Here's my take. Dialogue-only again (wanted to type something out quickly), Joker Out edition! You can decide for yourself who's who ❤️

"I think I’ve had enough. Haven’t you guys had enough?”

“Yeah, I think so. It was bad enough yesterday, and it’s only getting worse.”

“I’m going to strangle him with that fucking beanie soon.”

“If I have to hear one more fucking ‘ARE YOUU’ –”

“I swear, if they don’t work it out someone’s gonna get thrown out the window.”

“So, what do we do? We have to do something.”

“We could get them drunk tonight?”

“We’ve tried that before. Bojan drinks too much and becomes totally unfuckable.”

“We sabotage his alarm tomorrow morning so he’ll have to stay?”

“That would be good, except we kinda need him for Stožice rehearsal.”

“One day couldn’t hurt?”

“You really think he’d make it back after only a day?”

“Yeah, good point.”

“What if one of us just tells Jere?”

“Bojći would never forgive us.”

“He would if it works out?”

“We still don’t know for sure, though.”

“Don’t we? I mean. Look at them.”

“Still, it could backfire. I think he needs to do it on his own.”

“Truth or dare? Never have I ever, again?”

“One hotel room, one bed?”

“Sex pollen?”

“What?”

“Sorry, I thought we were just shouting out fanfiction tropes.”

“Again, what?”

“Never mind. CPR demonstration?”

“Mistletoe? Fake New Years?”

“We make them jealous? Someone hits on Jere?”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“Yeah, maybe not.”

“What if we just… took off?”

“You mean, now?”

“We’re all in the van. They’re still out there. Now’s our chance.”

“But…”

“There’s still plenty of time before soundcheck. And we won’t go too far. Let’s just scare them a little.”

“It’s worth a try?”

“Fine. Hey, let’s go! Go go go!”

“I’m going to text him. Dear… Mr… Cvjetićanin. This is your audacity calling. I have kidnapped your band. To get them back and to recover your dignity, please let the one and only Mr. Worldwide next to you know how you feel, and beg him to let you in his pants ASAP. Do this at your earliest convenience so we can make it to soundcheck on time, and also so your band won’t have to slap you into next week. Thank you for your cooperation.”

“Not too over the top at all, there.”

“Tell that to your shirt.”

“Has he seen it?”

“Yeah, he’s typing. ‘not funny, come back right now’. Predictable.”

“What’s next, ‘you are all jerks and I’ll tell your mommies’?”

“Umm, guys? I just got a text from Jere.”

“He has your number?”

“He knows your name??”

“Ha ha. It says, ‘I have plan tonight, back off.’”

“Huh.”

“Wow.” 

“Okay.”

“So… I guess we go back?”

“Yeah. But how are we going to…”

“Act like normal?”

“We’re so good at that.”

“So does this mean I have to put up with that same shit the whole day? Please, I can’t.”

“Maybe he’ll have something else to think about now, at least.”

“Who woulda thunk that guy had it in him?”

“Always knew it.”

“You would, you’re so soft on him.”

“Shut up.”

“I just hope it works out.”

“Which is worse, pining miserable Bojan, or just-got-laid-and-you-didn’t Bojan?”

“My money’s on the second, but I guess we’ll find out.”

“Yippee. Can’t fucking wait.”

[agoldengalaxy]

Blood of the Covenant

read on Ao3

words: 2444

--

Chapter 3: Not Your Job

Sam was starting to get really sick of white.

From where he sat beside the hospital bed, he pulled out his phone, scrolling through. Chloe had sent him a selfie of her making a stupid face with Nadine, who was trying to look uninterested, but not quite succeeding in hiding her smile. Beneath the picture, she had written, “Nadine says hi. Also, you owe us drinks.”

Despite himself, Sam smiled a little, typing up a reply. “In your dreams, ladies.” After a moment, he sent another. “Glad to see you’re doing well. I’m kinda tied up at the moment, but we’ll make plans soon.”

Even though the original message had been sent hours ago, Chloe replied almost right away. “Literally or figuratively? I can never tell with you.”

“Figuratively. But tomorrow, who knows?”

“Ah, hilarious. Well, don’t be a stranger, Sam. I’m always a call away. And tell your brother I say hello next time you see him.”

“Thank you, Chloe. Really.”

Sam blew out a breath, placing his phone in his pocket. It was nearly dead now, and he had to preserve what was left of his battery. Nate and Elena had stepped out to find a hotel room to book, joking that Sam desperately needed a shower. There was some truth in that, but Sam also knew he probably couldn’t get away with staying at the hospital again - and Nate and Elena definitely couldn’t.

His gaze drifted toward Sully’s face, obscured by the oxygen mask glinting in the harsh hospital light. Truly alone for the first time all day, Sam breathed in deeply, turning his gaze up to the ceiling. “That was stupid of you, Victor,” he mumbled. He knew people always said that coma patients were able to still hear. It felt stupid, but that didn’t stop him.

Biting his bottom lip, he scooted his chair a bit closer, hesitating a moment before taking Sully’s hand in his own. It was warm, calloused, wrinkled, and unmoving. After all the joking about being too old for it all, Sam was beginning to wonder if it was really true this time around.

“I’ve never been good to you. Not in the way you have for me. Nathan was right. And I guess you probably thought I’d eventually grow out of it, right?” He chuckled, perhaps a little bitterly. “Well, hey. You’re one patient son of a bitch.”

The truth was, he’d done his best to turn things around with Sully. After officially becoming partners, they had to. There was still something underlying, something that they both refused to talk about, and things had been fine up until this point. Sam, now, though, felt like it was all about to boil over.

“Y’know, I’m…I’m not a kid anymore. I feel like you got this whole idea in your head that it’s your job to protect me and Nathan.” He stopped himself, smiling a little sadly and wistfully as he glanced down at their hands together. “Eh, who am I kidding. You never stopped. Even when you were threatening me. Even when I didn’t deserve it.”

If he were being honest with himself, everything hurt. His head, from lack of food and water, his body from the little amount of sleep, the bruises from the fight. More than any of those things, his heart hurt. He wasn’t ready to say goodbye yet. For the first time since it had all happened, he felt truly, deeply out of his depth.

“It’s funny,” he continued idly, ignoring the way his eyes burned as he ran a thumb along Sully’s knuckles, “all those years of me telling you that you’re not my father, and I’ve tricked this entire hospital staff into thinking that you are. Christ.”

Suddenly, the phone in his pocket buzzed. He let go of Sully’s hand to answer it.

“Hey, Sam. We found a hotel down the street. I’m gonna send you the address.”

“I’ll be right over.”

Slipping it back into his pocket, he stood up, taking one final look at Sully’s sleeping form. “Never thought I’d miss your snoring so much,” he mused quietly. For a split second, he could have sworn he’d seen Sully’s finger twitch - but he chalked it up to exhaustion. He sighed, making sure that Sully’s sheets were comfortable for him, and then stepped toward the door. “Good night, Victor. Be back bright and early tomorrow.”

He wasn’t expecting a response, but he sure wished for one.

***

“Jesus, those guys are fast. Nathan, you okay?”

Sam, twenty-two years old, was standing in the jungle, breathing hard as his head whipped around, trying to catch glimpses of the strangers that were chasing them. At first, there was no response from his brother, and Sam nearly ducked right back onto the path where he’d come from, sure that Nate had been right behind him -

He emerged from the clearing with Sully, looking a bit worn-out.

Sam frowned, spreading his hands. “What happened? You were right behind me!”

“Tripped over the tree roots,” Nate mumbled, probably more embarrassed than hurt. “But I…” he trailed off, staring at the spot above Sam’s right temple. “Oh, my God. You’re bleeding.”

“What?” Sam’s brows shot up as he lifted a hand to his temple, two fingers coming back deep red. “Oh, shit.”

“You better take it easy, kid,” Sully insisted before Sam had even finished cursing, walking forward to sit him down on a nearby stump. While he continued, he checked him over. “We’re safe here for now, but we’re gonna have to keep moving eventually. Probably about time we cut our losses with this one.” He grimaced. “That’s a lot of blood. What happened?”

Anger bubbled in Sam’s chest again, that same feeling he seemed to have every day. Angry that Sully always acted so smart. Angry that Sully always seemed to save the day. Angry at himself, for getting hurt like this when they were on the verge of something big.

“Nathan,” he said, ignoring the question, “what do you want to do?”

“What?”

“Do you want to quit now?” All these years later, he still didn’t buy Sully’s concern. There had to be another reason. “I’m fine! The only reason they’re on our tails is because we got too close! We can actually get that treasure if we push a little further!”

Sully frowned, looking disappointed, but also like he expected it. “You know he wants this just as much as we do. He also doesn’t want his damn brother dying for it.”

Sam glanced toward Nate, who was looking between them like a deer caught in headlights. “Guys, please don’t fight again. C’mon.”

“I’ll stop fighting when Victor here stops talking for you.” Sam crossed his arms, looking at Nate expectantly. “Tell me you don’t think I can do it, and I’ll drop the whole thing right now.”

Continuing to look between them, Nate’s expression morphed into one of utter defeat. 

Oh God. He was only seventeen. What was he thinking?

Nate swallowed. “I think you can do it, but I don’t want you to…”

“What?” Sam’s heart dropped into his chest as he leapt to his feet, feeling a bout of dizziness as he did so. “Nathan, after…after everything we did to get here, you’re ready to quit?”

“It’s not that!” Nate cried, looking quite upset. “Look at you, Sam! You’re covered in blood!”

Suddenly quite aware of the way his heart pounded in his ears and the way his head throbbed, Sam stared at his brother for a moment, then turned away, chuckling bitterly. “Unbelievable.”

“Sam.” Sully’s voice was firm, not entertaining argument, placing a hand on Sam’s shoulder. “As fine as you think you might feel, you will get yourself killed. You hear me? We are leaving. Let’s. Go.”

Sam shrugged his hand off his shoulder, feeling that familiar anger again. He hated that feeling, once. He wasn’t sure when exactly he had embraced it. “If you two wanna quit, fine, but I’m gonna keep going.” He brushed himself off and started walking toward the opposite clearing, trying to ignore the dizziness he was feeling. 

“Sam!” Nate pleaded.

“What, did you come to your senses? Or are you still too busy riding Victor’s coattails?” Sam turned around, crossing his arms. “Look, I’m fine! Listen to me, Nathan. It’ll take way more than a little blood to get me down. Let’s go.”

“You,” Sully muttered, “are acting very stupid right now.”

He scoffed. “And what’ll you do about it, Victor? I’m not like my brother. I won’t just listen to everything you say. No matter how much you want it to be the case, you are not the boss here.”

“I’m not trying to be anyone’s boss,” Sully replied frustratedly, “I’m trying to keep you from getting yourself killed!”

“Yeah, well, that’s not your job.” Sam’s voice was bitter. The words tasted familiar, but he found himself surprised to realize he didn’t like how they felt. He was feeling dizzier by the second. “All you do is turn my brother against me. I’m supposed to be the one looking out for us! You’re not the boss, and you’re damn well not our father, so stop acting like it!”

Suddenly, Sam’s knees buckled. He fell, and he would have gotten a face full of dirt if it weren’t for the pair of arms that caught him before he could hit the ground. Everything was dark.

When he opened his eyes, he was laying in Sully’s arms. As he moved to sit up, a gunshot rang in the air. Blood pooled around Sully’s shoulder. He tumbled backward off a cliff. Sam screamed.

He sat bolt upright in bed, his chest heaving, eyes darting around the hotel room. It wasn’t humid, there wasn’t a jungle, there wasn’t a gun. Only sweat clinging to his forehead, sticking his hair down like glue, his heart pounding, and the ringing in his ears starting up again. 

“Sam? You okay?” By his bedside, Nate was standing there, looking concerned in the moonlight that poured through the window. Just past him, in the next bed over, Elena was still laying down, her back to them.

Sam exhaled shakily, pulling the crappy blankets off of his legs. “Yeah,” he lied, “yeah. I’m just gonna go have a smoke.”

“I’ll come with.” Nate’s tone made it seem like it wasn’t up for debate. Perhaps a bit begrudgingly, Sam nodded, stood up, grabbed the pack of cigarettes from the nightstand, and stepped toward the balcony of their hotel room.

The night air was still humid, but thankfully not too hot on his already warm skin. Leaning his forearms against the wobbly banister, he pulled out a cigarette, realizing his hands were shaking slightly as he went to light it. If Nate noticed, he thankfully didn’t say anything.

Side by side, the two of them didn’t speak for a while, the quiet sounds of the late night their third companion. The sky was littered with stars, completely free of clouds. It would have been beautiful, if everything didn’t seem so heavy.

“Did I wake you up?” Sam asked after a few long moments of silence, taking the cigarette between two fingers as he exhaled smoke in long curls up into the sky.

Nate chuckled, shaking his head. “No, I couldn’t sleep.”

“Got enough at the hospital, eh?” Sam joked lightly, nudging his shoulder. 

Nate’s smile faded a little, and he looked at Sam the same way he’d looked at him when he first showed up at Jameson’s all that time ago - like he was looking at a ghost, and he was guilty. “Sam, I’m…I’m so sorry. I had no right to say those things to you.”

Sam raised a brow at him, unable to stop a small smile from pulling at his lips. “Nathan Drake, owning up to something? Never thought I’d live to see the day.”

“Oh, shut up.”

Sobering a little, he took another drag of his cigarette. “...Thanks, little brother. I guess this has brought up a lot of feelings for both of us.” He exhaled slowly, watching it swirl upward. “Do you remember our little excursion to Brazil?”

“When you got that concussion?” Nate asked, leaning against the banister. “Yeah, I do. Sully had to carry you all the way back to the city.”

Sam chuckled. “Right.” He looked down, tapping the end of his cigarette lightly. “Even after I said a bunch of awful things to him back then, Victor still took care of me. After everything I’ve ever done, he still jumped to take that bullet for me without even thinking.”

“That’s just who he is,” Nate replied, perhaps a little gentler than he would have under normal circumstances. “You can try to push him away as much as you want, but he won’t stay far for long.”

“Don’t I know it.” Pressing the cigarette back to his lips, he glanced over at his brother. “I used to think he only tolerated me. Figured you were the golden child and I was the one he was stuck with.”

Nate’s brows furrowed. “Sam…”

“He used to treat us differently, you know?” he continued distantly, before he could really think about it. “He was always so much harder on me. In fact, I think he still is. I…never got to ask him why.” He stared at the cigarette between his fingers, a little trail of smoke floating toward the stars. “After all this time, I still don’t know why he’s kept me around.”

The words hung in the air for a moment, perhaps Nate being so shocked to hear his brother open up about something that it took him a minute to process. When he had, he placed a gentle hand on Sam’s shoulder. “I don’t know why he treated us differently,” he said slowly, “but he loves us. He loves you. Whatever happens, that won’t change.”

Sam looked at Nate now, looking so much older in the moonlight, and wondered when exactly he’d grown up so much. He’d missed out on fifteen years of his life, but right now, he felt like the younger one, more inexperienced, completely out of his depth. He cracked a small smile to hide the burn in his eyes and put out what was left of the cigarette beneath his foot.

“You sound like a wise old man, y’know that? Like a guru in those movies…”

“Aw, come on,” Nate groaned, “I was trying to help you!”

“You did! You did, it was just, ah…cliché.”

“You…are the worst.”

Together they stood, talking and joking like old times until the sun slowly peeked above the horizon, bathing them in golden light.

[bunnyychi]

A Heartstruck Collision - CH2

‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹‧˚₊꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Masterlist

Pairing: Zach Hadel x f!Reader

Warnings: Alcohol consumption and a weird hypothetical

A/N: Zach is mentioned for the first time let's goooo

Tags: If you wanna get tagged for the next chapters, just let me know!

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“Ughh, that is disgusting dude..” Ross closed his eyes, trying to shield his mind's eye from what Chris had just said. 

“Hey don’t shoot the messenger, I’m only re-telling what Zach asked me!” Chris said with a fit of giggles accompanying it. 

“Yeah but that’s like- No dude, I wouldn’t!” Another giggle from Chris who now looked over at you:

“Alright, (y/n) what do you think?” You really tried to ponder over the hypothetical but the alcohol in your bloodstream was telling you that ‘yes, and’ couldn’t be the answer to everything. “No, I wouldn’t!” 

The hypothetical stated that if you were alone in the world and the only other person was a relative, whether or not you’d sleep with them to save the human race. Nope, there was truly no comeback to counter this one.

“I’m still not convinced that Zach isn’t a social experiment.” Ross said, rubbing his eyes. You didn’t know who the guy was but apparently he had more of these theoretical situations which he regularly posed as questions to his friends. 

At this point, the bar was practically empty. Hayley and Raphael had left about an hour ago and if you were honest, you were growing quite tired as well. 

“By the way, what was that about Game Gyaru? Like where is it gonna be streaming?” 

Chris asked, clearly suppressing a yawn himself. 

Ross, Jackson and you looked at each other, Jackson just shrugged and returned the focus to his drink. “Well I guess for now the plan was to have the Pilot air on youtube and then i dunno, I think Arin said something about having talked with Netflix?” Ross frowned, not entirely sure if he was right about the thing. 

You nodded along, that was about what was written in the mails that went around.  

“Ugh but Netflix sucks with this kinda stuff. You won't even get any profit off of those media vampires.” Chris stated, the alcohol definitely turned him more confrontational. 

“Well what do you propose we should do then?” You asked.

“I mean, adult swim is like pretty fucking good with their creators. My friends also have a series on there and they never complained about anything.” 

Ross suddenly appeared to be in thought, Jackson had also perked up again. 

“Welp, anyway I think I'm gonna head home, tired as hell.” Chris stood up, you copied. Going home was definitely in order now. 

“We should talk to Arin about reaching out to Adult Swim, might be a good idea.” 

You agreed absentmindedly but that was a thought for tomorrow. 

Chris and you walked outside, the air hitting your lungs in a weird way. 

“Aw fuck..” you whispered. 

“Huh?” 

You truly were smart sometimes. Drinking alcohol when you still had to drive home. It was a short drive, yes, but still a bad idea. 

“I just realized I still gotta drive home, guess walking for 30 minutes is gonna sober me up nicely.” you let out a laugh realizing that getting angry about the situation wouldn't solve it regardless.  

“Oh shit, yeah you're right.” 

Chris probably wanted to go home but with your confession, he probably felt bad or that it would be awkward if he left now. Instead he put a hand on your shoulder, lightly tapping it with an apologetic smile. 

“I know we don't know each other but I could walk you home? Just for safety and all that. Or maybe Ross and Jack-” 

"Chriiis!" 

A car pulled up and stopped right in front of the bar. There was no traffic going on so there was no urgency to find a parking spot. 

“Lyle you son of a bitch- you're like what-” Chris looked at his phone. 

“1 ½ hours late! You stood me up man..” 

“Oh shit really?” The guy inside the car seemingly looked at the time and then started laughing. 

“Holy fuck I’m sorry!” He wiped a tear from the corner of his eye. Talk about time management. 

“You could drive us home though, that's (y/n) by the way. We've both got alcohol in our system so we need a ride.” 

Part of you wanted to protest, you didn't want to be a bother on your first day of meeting all of these people. The rational part of your brain decided against it though, Chris surely wouldn't have made the offer if he thought it would be a burden. And Lyle also seemed like a sweet guy. 

Without wasting much time, the both of you got into his black car. 

Quickly you gave Lyle your address to which he thankfully replied with a: “No problemo.”

The smile was apparent in his tone of voice. 

The car ride went by in a comfortable silence, Chris here and there talked about who you were and about the Game Gyaru Series, saying he'll talk to Zach about it, the guy who was still faceless in your head. You wondered if you'd ever get to fill in that gap.

***

You waved them goodbye as you got out of the car, having thanked Lyle about a hundred times already to which he simply replied with a genuine smile. 

Waddling over to the apartment complex, you realized that they drove off only when you had actually entered the place, ‘how nice’ you thought as you walked up the stairs. 

When you entered your apartment, the first thing you did was throw your shoes to the side and drop down on the couch. Although you had been tired and ready to sleep for the entire duration of the drive, now you felt more awake than ever. You groaned, thinking about how you had to walk to work tomorrow and quickly grabbed the remote, trying not to dwell on it for too long. 

“What did he say the show was called?” You mumbled to yourself, clicking through the shows presented on your smart tv. Did Chris even say what it was called? That guy, Zach, made the show, that was all you knew. No last name and no face. Exhausted, you turned the tv off again and slumped over to your desk. 

It was one of those weird states of mind where your body was tired and ready to collapse and yet your mind had that last little ounce of ‘can't sleep’ which could keep you up for who knows how long. 

Perhaps doodling a little might help tiring your mind? Pinterest was opened multiple times and closed just as many times. Nothing you were in the mood for was showing up on your front page and you didn't have any ideas on what to search up for inspiration. 

Maybe draw the evening? 

And that is what you did. You tried your best to draw a little sketch of Ross, Jackson, Chris and you in the booth. Jackson's head was resting on the table, at that point he had been very out of it. Meanwhile Ross and you were arguing with Chris about the strange hypothetical. A little speech bubble coming from Chris, a man whose face was replaced by a question mark was in it. 

Maybe it hadn't been your best drawing but it definitely was a fun addition to your sketchbook. 

Finally feeling tired enough, you slumped over to your bed, practically falling into it after setting your alarm for an hour earlier.

[jujumin-translates]

Event | Ayakashi Summer Festival | Chapter 3

Misumi: Hmmm, what would be good~? It’s gotta be something that both Madoka and the other people attending will enjoy…

Misumi: (Well, Madoka is a scriptwriter, so…)

Misumi: (I know! Since there’s a stage at the summer festival site, maybe a scriptwriting award or something would be something he’d like!?)

Azuma: Oh, what are you doing out here?

Misumi: Ah, Azuma! Are you gonna drink here?

Azuma: I thought I’d have a drink out here for a change… I’m not interrupting anything, am I?

Misumi: Nope, you can go ahead~!

Azuma: Thank you.

Azuma: Something on your mind, Misumi?

Misumi: Madoka is gonna come to the festival, and I want him to have fun~.

Misumi: So I was trying to think of good ideas to bring up at tomorrow’s meeting!

Azuma: I see, that’s so kind of you, Misumi.

Azuma: Have you thought of anything good?

Misumi: Mhm, so remember how we had a theater contest before…

Misumi: I was thinking of having a theater contest with an award for scriptwriting or something!

Azuma: An award for scriptwriting… Sounds interesting.

Azuma: If I remember correctly, the theater contest at Veludo Summer Festival from before had etudes…

Azuma: So how about making it a short scripted contest this time instead?

Misumi: Oh, yeah!

Misumi: Let’s bring that up at tomorrow’s meeting! Thanks for the advice, Azuma!

Azuma: You’re welcome.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Izumi: (Since it’s the first meeting, all the members from our troupe who are participating came…)

Hisoka: …There’s more people here than I thought there would be.

Guy: It must be people involved with the summer festival just like we are.

Masumi: And it’s gonna be a joint effort between the shopping district and Veludo Way too.

Omi: There are quite a few people I’ve seen in the shopping district before here. Just over there is the owner of the fruit and vegetable store and the bakery clerk.

Izumi: It is! There’s some of the shoppers who have taken our flyers too.

Guy: Hmm, and the lady from the shoe store is over there.

Hisoka: …There’s some of the regulars from the bar too.

Shift: Ah, MANKAI Company. ‘Sup, guys!

Misumi: Ah, Shift, Haruto!

Azuma: Hello, you two.

Haruto: Hi. The meeting is about to start, so we’d better get to our seats.

Masumi: I’m sitting next to Director. None of you get to.

Haruto: Yeah, yeah, whatever.

Shopping District Chairman: Everyone, thank you all for coming here today. Let’s get the joint summer festival meeting started.

Summer Festival Organizer: First, let’s start with the planning. If anyone has any suggestions, please raise your hand.

Haruto: Yes, I have one.

Summer Festival Organizer: Yes, go ahead.

Haruto: I’m Haruto Asuka from GOD-za. This time we’ll be having MANKAI Company joining us…

Haruto: So how about holding a theater contest with the theme of ayakashi, led by both theater companies?

Misumi: Ah…!

Azuma: Seems like Haruto also thought of doing a theater contest.

Misumi: Yeah. I was gonna make that suggestion, but what Haruto said might be better!

Participant A: Led by both theater companies, huh?

Participant B: It would certainly draw in more excitement.

Summer Festival Organizer: We think it’s a good idea, but what does MANKAI Company think?

Izumi: I’m in agreement. I’m all for it!

Summer Festival Organizer: Thank you so much. Well then, a theater contest between the two troupes has been decided on.

Misumi: I have something!

Summer Festival Organizer: Oh? Yes, you, over there.

Misumi: For the theater contest, I was thinking maybe we could do plays with short scripts and then have a scriptwriting award or something!

Izumi: (That must’ve been what Misumi-kun was thinking of proposing today.)

Participant C: I see, an award like that could work.

Participant D: We’ve never done anything like that before. Sounds interesting!

Shift: I think it’d be super cool to put the spotlight on those working behind the scenes. I’m def in agreement!

Guy: Yes, I as well.

Shopping District Chairman: Seems like everyone is in agreement.

Summer Festival Organizer: It does. We’ll make sure to work that in. Thank you for the lovely suggestions, everyone!

Misumi: Waah, yay~! Thank you so much!

Azuma: I’m glad it all worked out, Misumi.

Misumi: Ehehe, it’s thanks to you, Azuma!

[ ⇠ Previous Part ] • [ Next Part ⇢ ]

[tojisun]

cuddle in the stuffie pile is my dream 🥺 the sharks will keep us safe! also you should totally get an orca stuffie but maybe i’m biased hehe.

vodka slush?? i haven’t had one of those!! how do you make one? oh goodness i’m gonna have to get a drink for tomorrow night! patiently waiting for the day when there’s more emojis and the orca is part of it ):

honestly that sounds like such a bad ass way to introduce them and they’re so powerful like i love them so so much. i wanna go watch this documentary now or something similar. i just get so sad watching them bc the babies always get into trouble. like i was watching prehistoric planet about dinosaurs and one of the babies got eaten and its like im feeling so sad about a baby from hundreds of millions of years ago…. ):

but orcas being more studied and classified and !!!! that makes me happy.

the sharks will keep us safe yes!!! i have a big big one that actually covers about half of my bed so yk we’re cGed and protected 🙂‍↕️

im planning on getting an orca one but i cant find one that looks soft enough so might just wait out on that one :(

VODKA SLUSH honestly idk how my friend does it (in measures) but its basically finely crushed ice, vodka, green apple soju, and melona ice cream. it upset my stomach the first time i tried it but then i got obsessed :’>

the documentary is called “blue whales: the return of the giants” bc its about the researchers trying to see if theres a sign of life of blue whales, particularly the babies!, in this region (which was a popular spot for hunting of blue whales back in the time) and when the orcas appeared, the researchers agreed that thats not a good sign because theyre the apex predator. but there are blue whales there! theyve returned and it was so 🥹

oh yea the babies always make me so :( like i saw this documentary of orcas stealing a baby humpback from its mom by following the swimming patterns of the mom humpback and the baby was confused so it didnt fight back! the narrators dont go into the details of what happened but it does get you a lil stumped yk

but yes this new development (because it was only released in may of this year) for orcas is so thrilling!! one of the diffs between bigg’s and residents i remember was where they swim. thing was, they swim in the same waters, what differed was the distance. idk which one swims farther than the other, so it also affects their diet and their hunting styles which, for a while, they thought was only caused by different cultures within each families, not bc theyre diff species!

hhhh sorry for the word vomit again 😔 and thank u sm for chatting w me!!!!

[mrs-johansson]

Chapter 4: Captain America: The Winter Soldier - Partners in crime

Part 10:

“Why do I only see you when you get into a hospital?” My dad’s grumbling voice woke me up. Bright lights were making opening my eyes a difficult task but I managed. “I wasn’t planning on getting here,” I declared. “Yeah, everyone says that. How are you anyway?” He took a seat at the side of my bed. “I’m dizzy, but I’m sure I’ll get better in no time,” I sighed and he nodded. “Romanoff just left, she had some government stuff to deal with.” “She was here?” Maybe she visited Steve. “Yeah, didn’t leave your side since they brought you in.” “Right… How’s Steve?” “Holding up, this Sam guy is with him.” “He’s a friend.” “I thought he was a fan, to be honest.” “Sometimes I do too. Can you ask a nurse when they will let me go?” I vocalized. “Yeah, sure.”

She was here. I wouldn’t expect her to do this but clearly she didn’t want me to know since she left. I hope we work things out soon.

***

After one more day in the hospital, I was let go. Going home, I didn’t know what to expect. Is she gonna be there or she'll be long gone?

Unlocking the door I was scared to walk in, but I pushed open the wooden door and I stepped inside.

Seeing a piece of paper on the countertop, I quickly got that and saw that Natasha signed the bottom.

I hope when you read this, you’ll be fully healed and well because you scared us all pretty bad. Even though we broke up, I still want our work to be unbothered from this because it’s very important for both of us. We basically started off as colleges, we should be fine.

I cleaned out my stuff from the apartment, and temporarily I will move back to the HQ. You can stay if you want but we could also keep this as a safe house until we find some options for its future.

Lastly, I wanted to say sorry. We planned so much for us and we were blinded by the pink fog which led us here. All I hope is that all we need is time. You were my first love Y/n, and nothing can change that. But until then, please be careful and never forget, pain only makes us stronger.

Tears were unstoppable. My heart ached. Natasha was my home and my peace. She was the one who I came home to when I had a rough day or she was the one who woke me up from a nightmare.

For a whole year I learned how not to rely on people but she was my person. And now I have to change my life because we didn’t work.

***

After both Steve and I have recovered, Sam and the two of us decided to go out and have some drinks.

“Even though Sam has lost our bet, I’ll pay for tonight’s drinks. Post-breakup spending is everything that I need right now,” we sat down at a table. “How you holding up?” Asked Sam. “Well… I cry myself to sleep every night but I'm fine. I haven’t seen her since, but I don’t want it to affect work, so I need to get my shit together. So we need to drink tonight, these are the times that I wish I could get drunk.” “Alright, that’s why we need a lot of drinks,” Sam stood up. “What are you drinking?” he asked. “Gin and tonic for me, please.” “I’m good with a beer.” As Sam left Steve took his chance and asked away.

“So daughter…” He had a small smile on his freshly shaved face. “Yeah, not a happy story, don’t get your hopes up.” “Is there anything happy about the Red Room?” Giving Steve a shortened version of the story, he was kind of in shock. “So he’s trying to find her?” He asked. “Yeah, I guess.” “Do you think you could be a mom?” He asked. “I don’t know. I’m sure it would be difficult at first, like for everybody, but then I would get great at it.” “I think you would be a great mom.” “Thanks, Steve .”

For the rest of the night we were drinking like there was no tomorrow. Honestly I was feeling sorry for Sam, because he will regret every sip of alcohol tomorrow.

***

The next day we met up with Fury, then I decided I’m gonna work from Stark Industries for a while, lay low and do subtle jobs. Nick thought it was a good idea too.

I texted Natasha and told her if she wanted, she could have the place for herself since I still had my apartment in Manhattan. It would have been a waste to sell that place. So I packed all my stuff by the end of the week. I was finishing the last box when the door opened, and Natasha walked in.

“I’ll be out in a minute, this is the last one,” moving my hands around and all my things flying inside the box. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you mowing out is way easier,” said Nat as she walked to the kitchen unpacking her groceries. “I gotta use this for something, don’t I?” “I guess… You hungry, I bought some Chinese?” She poked her head out of the kitchen. “Actually I have to go, I need to prepare for a meeting tomorrow.” I took off the apartment key of my keychain before grabbing the last box. “This is yours,” I extended the little key to her but she shook her head. “Keep it, just in case,” Natasha shrugged with a barely noticeable smile on her face. “Alright,” putting it back in my pocket, I made my way towards the door. “I guess I’ll see you around,” I gave her a small nod. “See you around.”

***

Weeks have been passing by. I had a mission every 5 days and in those 5 days I was at the office. Working has been a great distraction from Natasha. We talk like every couple of days. She’s been out of the country for a week now, doing some work for Fury.

Today I had a presentation for the company, a 3 year plan for Stark Industries.

“We need to rebuild some parts of New York. The battle was way too damaging for the citizens and building accommodation is our best way to do so,” I said. On the screen I made a layout of a couple new buildings we could make. “Since we had multiple global sized threats, our buildings need to be stable and practical. Families have lost their homes and we're gonna give it back to them. You’re gonna get the files about the plan by the end of the afternoon. Thank you for your time today,” I looked around and with a round of applause we finished our meeting.

“Y/n you have a visitor waiting in your office,” Liam walked up to me. “Who?” “All he said was James, he wished to remain quiet about him being here.” James is here? “Alright, please keep everyone away from my office.” “Right away.” “Thank you.”

Walking in the hallway, I didn’t know what to expect. He was here as James so anything could happen.

Placing my hand on the handle, I took a deep breath in, then opened in. He was sitting at my desk, not in my chair of course. As he heard the door James turned around. I closed the door behind me and slowly walked to my chair.

He had a baseball hat on, his hair brushed behind his ears. Simple black t-shirt and a brown jacket over it. Leather gloves covering his hand.

“You know, Steve is desperately looking for you. But I’m guessing you want to lay low,” I sat down. “I can’t see him, I need time,” he said. “Where have you been?” “Bucharest, had some missions over there and I always liked the city, very calm and hidden.” “Glad you’re alive,” I gave him a small smile. His features have softened since we last met. “Thank you for not killing me, you had the chance,” he smiled lightly which was a relief. “Well what can I say, I try not to,” I shrugged and we chuckled, but it died down quickly. “How are you holding up?” I asked and he didn’t know how to answer. I could hear his confused thoughts. “You know that by now, don’t you?” He asked with a small smirk but I shook my head. “I don’t use that on people close to me.” “Not even your girlfriend?” I sighed and shifted in my seat. “We broke up.” “What happened?” “He told me about you and her, not gonna lie it was a big surprise… and she just couldn’t open up. I’m not building a relationship on lies.” “So you’re single?” He asked. “That I am.” “Not for long probably. You look pretty good when you are not getting shocked.” “Wow, never thought I’d live the day you talk normally, maybe even flirt,” I chuckled. “That bad, huh?” “Could’ve been worse, but with your looks you could get anyone you want so… don’t worry about the talking.” He nodded. “Not to be rude but… why did you come here?” “I think she might be alive and I needed a place to lay low, but you’re the only person I trust.”

She might be alive? How? This can’t be real. “What makes you think that?” My leg bounced, and my heart started racing. “There’s an orphanage in Main, a girl named Katarina Barnes, she’s two and born in Russia, around the due date you were supposed to have. Her DNA showed all American genes. She grows slowly, probably because of the Super Soldier genes and your godly ones. I needed you to know before I go and see her.” “I’m coming with you,” I said harshly. “But we need to lay low, nobody can know I’m here,” James said with a serious expression on his face. “I’ll hide you, but we need to get her.”

***

“I’ve got some mail for you also, this one I didn’t know what it was. No information on it,” Liam handed me a couple things along with a big orange envelope. “Alright, thank you.”

Opening the envelope, I saw right away that it was Katarina’s birthserificet and all her medical papers.

Going straight to the lab, I tested everything and I sat through the whole night to wait and see if our DNA’s match.

I woke up to my phone buzzing on the counter and as I sat up, I knew it was probably the worst idea to sleep while sitting.

“Yeah?” I spoke into the phone. “Hey, did I wake you?” Natasha’s voice rang through the phone. Shit, she was supposed to bring me some papers. “Ugh yeah, but I just fell asleep accidentally.” “So you’re not at the office?” “I am, kind of. I’m in my lab, can you come down please? I have to show you something,” I cleared my throat trying to get rid of my sore throat. “I’ll bring coffee and breakfast, I bet you haven’t eaten in a decade.” Why is she nice?! I can’t get over her if she’s nice! “Okay, thanks.”

In about thirty minutes, the elevator’s sound alerted me about Nat’s arrival.

“I thought you left those days behind when you sleep here,” Natasha’s woke voice made me turn around. “My daughter is alive.”

Natasha’s mouth dropped open and she stopped in her tracks before slowly walking towards my desk, placing everything on the table. “Are you serious?”

“I mean I haven’t checked the DNA test, but it’s a really big possibility,” I stared at the screen, afraid to look at the results. “Well why didn’t you?” She pulled a chair to the desk and sat down.

“What if she’s not mine… I’ve had hope for a couple of days now, that she’s alive and close. What if it’s not true?” I felt my heart pounding, scared to lose this tiny bit of hope too.

Nat placed a hand on my back which made me look at her. She’s being physical and I’m getting anxious not gonna lie. We are supposed to be broken up.

“Look… there’s another side to those ifs. What if she’s yours, what if you could finally have her? Check the result. Whatever happens, you still have a daughter,” her green eyes were giving so much comfort and I miss that every day. “Fine…”

Clicking on the test, then the result, I brought it out on a projector. The big blue hologram showed the answer.

Tears were floating down my cheek as I read over and over again the positive word. I know Nat was talking but I couldn’t hear anything right at that moment.

I have my daughter and she’s alive.

***

“Ready to go in?” Asked James from the driver’s seat. I looked at the orphanage and all I could think about was this little girl, who was all alone since she was born. “Yeah.”

We called ahead that we were coming and I was never this nervous about anything. I’m about to meet my daughter. After the DNA check, James and I were sure that we needed to come and see her

Walking in I had mixed feelings. If they allow us to adopt her, will I be able to take care of her? Mom’s usually have 9 or more months to prepare for motherhood. And I have had 2 weeks so far.

The manager of the orphanage was very kind to us and immediately showed the way to Katarina. “She’s an angel. Even though she can’t really communicate with the other kids, she has a couple friends who she plays with all the time.” The woman said and I smiled at her words.

There were about six kids in the playroom. It was decorated very nicely, animal cartoons painted on the walls and different shades of earth toned furniture around the room and tons of toys for the babies.

“She’s the one with the pigtails. Now that we’ve met, she’s a great mix of the two of you,” said the woman and I quickly found Katarina. I grabbed onto James’ arm and couldn’t take my eyes off of the little girl.

She had piercing blue eyes and dark brown hair, all from Barnes. A big smile on her face, a couple of teeth already visible. A small flowery dress was on her and tiny shoes. She was perfect. “Can we meet her?” I asked. “Of course, I’ll walk you to a room and we’ll get ready for you.”

The door opened. A woman walked in with Katarina in her hands. She was looking around curiously, small hands resting on her caretaker’s shoulders.

We made eye contact and I fell in love immediately. The pureness in her eyes was unmatchable. “Here you go,” the woman handed her to me, and I was afraid to even touch her. Putting my hands under her arms, I sat her down on my lap.

Big blue eyes were staring up at me and I couldn’t hold back my smile. “I know you can’t hear but hi,” I whispered, brushing a piece of hair out of her face. As I touched her little face, a smile spread across her cheeks. “You’re perfect,” a single tear rolled down my cheeks. “Does she know sign language?” I turned to the manager. “Yes, she’s a very quick learner.”

James took off the glove from his right hand, and carefully reached towards Katarina’s tiny hand. His one finger fit into her whole hand. He waved to her and she looked at him with a huge smile.

We finally found our daughter, who is the most adorable human being on the planet. And she’s perfect, the prettiest little girl.

Even tho she had a rough meeting with the world at first, from now on I will do everything in my power to protect her for on anything and anyone, and show her the word that she holds in her tiny little hands.

****************************************************

This would be the last part of Chapter 4. It’s a little shorter than the last ones, but I thought I wouldn’t drag it out more. Next chapter will be:

Avengers: Age of Ultron - Two Ghosts