#i have no idea how these things are related

[isuggestforcefem]

Hey, I'm a generally unhappy cis guy(afaik), and I've thought to myself that I wish I had been born a girl, but I'm not exactly sure why. I fear I'm just projecting an internalized manosphere/incel-esque "women have it easier" perspective onto my present loneliness. For my entire adult life, my actions(and general inaction) have/has been controlled by the desire to not be the type of man that all men are stereotyped to be in certain spaces, the view of which I know not be true now, but that I worry I heard and believed at too early and formative an age. How do I know I'm actually trans and not just a man who hates the box that is manhood? The thing is, I really don't care about what other men think of me. They could call me a faggot/whatever, but patriarchy as enforced by women just hits all the harder in my experience. Terfs have done far more to dissuade me from pursuing this line of thought than normie transphobic men ever have. As in, the idea that I will only ever be the predator/monster I was destined to become.

I don't even know what I'm saying here at this point. Do you relate to any of what I've said? Any suggestions? :3

That seems pretty trans to me. How do you know you are? That’s simple. Give being a girl a honest, genuine try. Maybe just with your friends, or with a reduced comitee. And not a one day try that stops when you realize you feel slightly uncomfortable when called she. Because, where does that discomfort come from. From not wanting to be called that, or from wanting to, so desperately, but knowing you’re not supposed to?

Finally, you are not a predator for wanting to be a girl. What wanting to be a girl means is just that you might be one. Autogynephilia isn’t real

[papysanzonew]

It can't be Christmas without Merlin content, am I right????

Read it an AO3 My general idea of this story is this:

Gwen and Merlin are together at the beginning of it all, they are a happy, smiling, warm couple and everything Arthur would ever have wanted in life. Arthur knew Gwen by sight and had a crush on her but in the end between his father pestering him and his various work commitments and Morgana teasing him he never did anything to hit on her, then Gwen changed companies and the two never saw each other again, at least until many years later when Morgana invited Gwen to a Christmas party and Gwen showed up with Merlin, her boyfriend.

Arthur was even more defeated.

But at the party, relations were re-established, even though it was not his intention, Arthur got on well with Merlin and his small talk, and the three of them started to see each other from time to time outside work. One thing led to another, and at one point it was Gwen and Merlin who asked Arthur to become an item.

Arthur wouldn't let them say it twice.

It was not easy with Uther spouting venomous comments passing them off as (almost) compliments but everyone knew what Uther was like and, for Arthur's sake, left the subject alone.

In the meantime Morgana got involved with Gwaine and there Uther couldn't shut his mouth and tell her how unsuitable Gwaine is for her, that he's a loser, that he's a scoundrel who doesn't even know what he wants to do with his life, and Morgana, in response, left without ever looking back, leaving the company and the house she was living in to go and stay in Gwaine's mini-apartment and talk about their future.

Uther didn't take it well and started to lash out even more at Arthur.

Until Gwen became pregnant.

All three were at the height of joy at the idea of having a child and Arthur thought that nothing could spoil such a beautiful moment.

Obviously he was wrong.

Uther started railing and telling him that everything was perfect until it became serious, until Arthur still had the chance to leave that depraved couple and finally find himself a decent girl and get married and have a family with this hypothetical girl.

Then the racist and homophobic invectives began and for the first time Uther openly said what he thought of Gwen and Merlin.

As a result, Arthur was at his wits' end and for the first time in his life raised his hands against his father.

Fortunately Gwen and Merlin were there for him when he returned home.

The two did not speak to each other for years.

In the end it was Uther himself who came crawling back to both his children and asked for forgiveness. After spending birthdays and Christmases alone, without receiving a single call and being left in a huge house completely alone, he realised what the really important things in life are.

That wasn't easy either.

It wasn't easy to accept an apology from such a man because there was always this anxiety that Uther had ulterior motives or, God forbid, wanted to put strange ideas into his grandchildren's heads.

Grandchildren he was not allowed to see even when he apologised and Morgana and Arthur made an effort to talk to him again.

However, when he was allowed to see the grandchildren, both Morgana and Arthur were amazed because Uther literally cried tears of joy (even though he tried to hide them), he had no preference for one or the other and showered them with love (Morgana and Arthur still find it hard to accept this because "UGH who is this man who is good with children?") and after many years they are all happy and celebrate all holidays together.

Uther gets along very well with Hunith (and Merlin is very worried about this) and the house is always full of people coming and going.

Uther no longer lives in a house that is too big and too quiet.

Anyway, Merry Xmas/Happy Holiday everyone ❤️❤️❤️

[stealthetrees]

Commander Fox is very injured and his batch only found out cause his medic wrote such a scathing report about it. Many other medics are confused and worried about a patient who is being looked after by a doctor that said “I hope that son of a bitch gets the rest of what’s coming for him”.

Cody and Rex are able to get to Coruscant to see him, and are distraught to find he’s been attacked by a sith. Lightsaber burns, even lightning scars all over his body. They ask who attacked him and got an earful from the other commanders that 1. Fox should be dead right now and karma will fix that oversight shortly if one of them did not and 2. Stop being sad for him it will only encourage his reckless behavior.

Cody and Rex get them to admit it was Palptatine, at witch point they are ready to get the pitchforks and torches, when Thorn sits them down and explains that Fox somehow got it into his head that Palpatine is somehow the mastermind behind the creation of the clones and also the war, which he is controlling both sides of, and is using the whole situation to grab power and will later name himself emperor of the galaxy.

Everyone agrees that that is insane. Thorn then explains Fox has been attempting to blackmail Palpatine. He broke into his apartment one night and startled the poor old man, who was just trying to defend himself. Palpatine is also currently in the hospital recovering from the fight with Fox. It’s not until Cody and Rex are all the way back on their ship that this means that Palpatine is, in fact, a sith.

[tarotmundomonde]

Winter 2024-2025 General Reading

pick a number 1-5 OR an emoji 🦚 🐕 🐍 🐙 🕷️

(ps. this reading is for practice)

1.🦚 Okay, first of all, you got lots of people cards, so this winter there will be a focus on relationships. Overall, it looks like a time of success for you, a time to put yourself out there, take your place and to tap into your self-confidence. Or you could find yourself feeling super self-confident this winter. I see a mix of practicality and creativity. You'll be in this more leadership energy, taking the lead, making things happen. A lot of courage and bravery and you will not be giving up on anything you are passionate about. This winter will be all about thriving and forward movement. Also, studies or a hobby could take priority. It looks like learning some new skills, buying books, like I see you purchasing things you need. So if you are a student, you could be buying books, too, spending time reading. Also, another thing that you will be focused on is your wellbeing and health. You will want to feel cozy and comfortable and thriving. You might pay more attention to the food you eat and I'm getting reference to the clothes you wear. Let's go into the details now. It looks like this winter you'll be doing some more major cleaning up, re-arranging your stuff. And I also see you collecting something. For some of you, maybe you study history or your hobbies or work is related to history somehow. Otherwise, there could be a moment of looking back. For example maybe you'll be looking at a family album or old pictures, or just self-reflecting. Like who you used to be, what your dreams used to be and how things are now, how you've changed, perhaps you are even daydreaming about the future or thinking about the future. You could experience moments of complacency, being too comfortable with how things are now. There is a focus on your root and heart chakra, so if you feel like you are experiencing some blockages, maybe work on those chakras, maybe do some root and heart chakra healing. There is also a reference to your eyesight. Also, it seems there will be a focus on women in your life and in your feminine energy. If you have a pet, there could be a focus on your pets. Or maybe you'll get a pet this winter. Otherwise, I see you working on empowering your feminine energy. The cards are talking about overcoming your fears and about perception. Remember to look at things from different perspectives. Again, be aware of a tendency towards complacency. Because it looks like there could be an opportunity for a new beginning and you are encouraged to open new doors. After all, the new door can lead to abundance and more success. It looks like you might be dealing with gossip this winter. First of all, remember not to be the one gossiping. After all, you do seem to be receiving a lot of attention. But at the same time, gossip tends to be something that comes with success. So since you are successful and receiving attention, of course, it leads to people gossiping about you. Remember to be you and lighten up. After all, you will want to focus on the good stuff and on your success. It will be a time of joy and blessings. Also, of wishes coming true and of surprises! Merry Christmas!

2.🐕 For pile 2 as well, relationships will be on focus this winter. There will be a nice energetic balance in your life present this winter for you. I see a lot of forward movement. Exciting news, exciting endeavours, exciting happenings, events. A lot of excitement. Also, a lot of action and a lot of passion. Lots of conversations, perhaps you'll find yourself communicating a lot with people, even exchanging ideas, maybe going on dates. You''ll have opportunities and doors opening for you. Some choices to make, but it feels like they are all good in their own way. I see a lot of smiles, happy times for you this winter. The energy coming through for you is rather light and positive. Also, patience will be important. And you might meet someone new or have a crush this winter. Let's go into the details now. So one theme coming through is grief, bittersweetness and forbearance. But that is something normal to happen, when you have plenty of options. For example, at school you cannot have 10 different main majors at once. And of course, there will always be challenges to face, but it looks like you will take on this fearless attitude and you'll be facing every situation and challenge head on. The cards are also talking about forgiveness and compassion, acceptance and self-acceptance. Also, the cards are talking about removing the background noise, remove the distractions. And you could benefit from using your imagination. Maybe you could ask someone, how they'd deal with some situations or imagine, how they would. As for chakras, you have a focus on the heart chakra, throat chakra and solar plexus chakra and root chakra. So if you are experiencing some blockages, perhaps try working on these chakras. Ooh, you got the joker card. Anything can happen. All you can do is just see, what will happen. You also got reference to male figures in your life and to the masculine energy. This winter will be a more active time for you. A time of creating healthy boundaries and chasing after your dreams. This winter will also be a time of renewal for you. You have lots of references to movement. So maybe you'll be moving around a lot, like from place to place. Relocation is possible. But also, this winter is a good time to focus on your physical health and to make sure you move a lot. Dancing and riding a horse or bycicling is also coming through. Otherwise, this winter will be a time to make some decisions, expecially in regards to your actions, next moves. It will be a time to bring in the light. Not just more positive vibes, but also clarity. You have abundance available to you at this time. And it looks like romance will be knocking at your door this winter. If you are already in a relationship, then either it's a time of healing your connection or it's a time, where you just enjoy the romance in the air with your partner. Merry Christmas!

3.🐍 Pile 3, you got strong stability in the cards for you this winter, however, it looks like you will be going through lots of growing pain this winter. It looks like you might be too much in your head, only thinking and not listening to your heart. There is also a strong theme of trying to fit in and not being your authentic self. Being too influenced by other people and their opinions. You have also themes of gossip here, secrets, backstabbing, you name it. So you definitely would benefit from keeping a lower profile this winter, like keep things to yourself. Also, pay attention to your health. I see lots of backpain, stiff neck, headaches, stuffy nose. It also looks like you could be gathering some information, studying, filing papers and the likes. Let's go into the details now. Indeed, you will be experiencing a bit of storms this winter. Uncontrolled feelings from negative thinking. A lot of impatience and lots of impasses. However, it's because you are on a quest. You are going through a time of growth and clearing of the old energies. And learn to relax! Practice breathing techniques. The chakras that came for you are the throat chakra and sacral chakra. So it could do you some good working on those chakras, perhaps doing some healing work on those chakras. This winter will be a time of taking notes and making notes. A time of writing down new ideas, doing some planning, getting organized with your studies/hobbies/projects/work. Go deeper and get focused, even laser focused. Like dive in deep into the topics you are studying or for example the essays you are writing. Get crystal clear. Otherwise, it looks like eventually you'll get back up, release difficulties, getting back up from the depths. Peace restored. It will be a time to find and reconnect with your inner resources, your inner power. And know that you have divine protection.

4.🐙 Pile 4, you have a lot of themes of things being hidden from you, things being in the shadows, things happening behind the scenes, as well as blessings in disguise. There will be some clarity, but also a lot hidden from you. You can gain some new perpesctives, new ideas and mental breakthroughs. Pay attention to your dreams, you might be more receptive to hidden messages, while asleep. Very, very high emotions. Lots of cycles and phases going on, emotional rollercoasters. You will need to work on your emotions this winter. Also, materialism. And fears. If you are open to spiritual energy, you seem to have a lot of shadow work to do this winter. It's like your emotions in every way will go up and down. One day you are obsessed, next day you couldn't care less or you will straight out feel bored. Drama. Let's go into the details now. For one, you got messages about music. Also, of limitations. You might need to create some limitations or restrictions to make something work. For example if you do music, let's say a pop song, will people be into it, if the song lasts for over 10 minutes? Also, collaboration, working together is going to be important this winter for you. You have lots of messages related to relationships. One theme is humility and justice, fairness. Generousity. You also got messages about rejection and façade. And also that someone is not your soulmate. So this can go in two ways. Maybe there is someone into you and you feel strongly that they are not your person. Or you like someone a lot, but it's just a façade and that's why you experience rejection from them. Someone is not your person. And you also have the theme of attachment here, desperation and longing. So pay attention to that. Maybe you just don't want to be single and that's why you are stuck on someone. Nonetheless, it is clear that this winter you'll need to work on setting strong boundaries. Also, this winter it will be a time to loosen your grip and learn to stress less. And to find peace within. Again messages about your intelligence. You have brilliant ideas this winter. Use your mind to find solutions. The cards also are talking about divine presence in your life and divine protection. Also, you need to learn to see what's of true value and to learn to protect it by setting healthy boundaries. Also, you got a tree spirit card. So it could do you good to spend more time outdoors, maybe literally go hugging trees. Also, you got a message about deep rooted love. Tap into your self-love.

5.🕷️ Pile 5, it seems relationships will be in focus for you this winter. Also, stability. Securing your stability, safety, security, finances. There is a need for stable routines, to focus on what you eat and to focus on sleeping and resting enough. If you are committed, married or just dating, it looks good, even great. And if there are any issues, you can easily heal them this winter with your partner. Also, one-on-one communications are favoured for you this winter. Forgiveness, mutual understanding and spending a good time together, it's all in the cards for you this winter. If you are female, taking the initiative, making the first move is on you. Let's go into the details now. First, about the chakras. The chakras that came through for you are third-eye, root and solar plexus chakra. So if you feel like you are experiencing some blockages, maybe work on reblancing these chakras. You literally got STOP and START. Sometimes you need to stop everything you are doing and rest for a moment. And sometimes you just need to take the first step to start a project. Or to restart. Or to start all over again. It looks like you need to work on timing, scheduling. You have people around you, who can help you, guide you, assist you. The cards are talking about a lack of freedom. There is a need to learn to release in order to make room for the new. You need to pay more attention to your thoughts' vibrations and you seem to need to release some emotional baggage. You may need to practice spending some time alone, because that makes room for releasing negative energies. For example think about sleep. You also seem to be going through some karmic lessons this winter. You have messages about faith and miracles. Also, about discovery. It seems you will learn some lessons. You have also messages about strength and kindness. Allow yourself to receive support, strength and kindness from others. Merry Christmas!

[imbecominggayer]

Writing Advice: Writing Authentic Dialogue

For @radiantmocha TL;DR: advice for writing combat and improving dialogue authenticity?

I'm sorry that this post is going to be so short but it's a really simple topic for me :D

A) Authenticity: Actually Talk To These People Or Read Their Books

When it comes to looking for authentic dialogue, especially in relation to combat, just trying to start up a connection with a professional can be the gateway into actual realism.

If you can, try talking to a veteran or someone actively serving in the military!

If you are interested in a specific time in history that no one is currently alive from, try talking to either a historian or a history buff.

If neither of those options work for you, try reading books and other stories that were written by veterans. My favorite book of this genre is "All Quiet On The Western Front" which is a semi-autobiographical book exploring what life was like for german soldiers in WW1 which was written by Erich Maria Remarque, a German veteran of WW1.

I emplore you to explore stories, even fictional stories, that were written by soldiers!

B) Authenticity: Accounting For The Environment

What's the time period that the story is set?

Where is the story set?

What is the socio-economic status of the protagonist?

What is the personality of the protagonist?

Answer these questions (and more) to understand what a character will and wont say. Characters fighting in WW1 won't reference tanks pre-Battle of Somme.

This advice is true for everything. An innocent, rich kid will certainly speak differently, using different verbage, in comparison to a kid living in the slums. They will also prioritize different things.

What I hate most in stories is when characters, poor for their entire life, poverty-striken, starts wildly proclaiming ideas of justice, fairness, and equality while fighting bullies left and right. Most people in that situation need to keep their head down. They can't afford to go to the police station for "contributing to the a fight" Independent women can't get into the middle of a fight! Do you know how much medical bills cost? If they manage to survive, it's not going to be pretty. No matter how much self-defense classes like to tell women, most women understand that they can't overpower a determined man.

That isn't evil, that's survival, that's practicality! Ideals have always been prioritized by people privileged enough to have the time to think while the poor and always working need to be always working!

Sorry, that was a rant

In Conclusion:

Read stories that real people have written that are either semi-autobiographical or autobiographical! Keep in mind the time and place!

And so sorry for that rant!

[the-hype-on-tv]

pony names are something that intrigue me

there's the cakes, that all have the same second name: mr carrot cake, mrs cup cake and the twins pound cake and pumpkin cake

except they don't, mrs cake was previously chiffon swirl, which means she didn't just add "cake" as her last name, she changed both her names

does that mean that when some ponies marry, they change their full name??

also, their cutie marks. some of them have names related to their cutie marks (vinyl scratch has a music note, snails has a snail, diamond tiara has a.. diamond tiara)

so, somehow, the parents either know what their foal's talent will be when naming them, or they change it once they get their cutie marks

so could that mean that ponies like diamond tiara had a different name before getting their cutie marks?? a counter argument is that her parents are rich so ofc they'll want to name her after something that is delicate and shiny

but how do you explain rarity?? her parents (btw there's so little info on them that they have two names each oof) are named cookie crumbles//betty bouffant and hondo flanks//magnum. their talents are cooking and something related to sports, respectively. magnum is also seen fishing in the background. why would they name their firstborn with such a delicate and royal name, if none of them share said interest?

maybe it's a metaphor, since rarity combines their features in such a unique way??

sweetie belle could be related to what her mom bakes (sweets) and again something related to fancy things again (belle), sweetie is also something refined tho

and back to family names, I get the most confused about grandmares and grandstallions. like granny smith. i know it's a pun on the apple breed but imagine calling your kid or sister "granny" when she's still a foal???? that's gotta be so weird. same goes for grand pear, again it's a pun on "grandpa" or probably another pear breed idek but like ?????? still weird

tl;dr: pony names are weird and i have no idea how they work

[midnight-mourning]

On Your Cue, Starlight

Ever the perfect performer, he'll wait for you~ (probably)

*please click for better quality tumblr nerfed this entire post >_<*

Hi @kibbits!! I was your secret santa this year, made you a lil something with your BAL fella! saw you ALSO enjoy the nutcracker and jumped on making something related to that hehe

I imagined this at a point where they're starting to test the boys out with actual shows, and a form of the nutcracker ballet would be perfect for it! Y/N (slightly nervously) takes the role of a clara-eqsue character, with Sun being the Nutcracker and Moon of course playing the mouse king which leads to, interesting, battle scenes haha,

had a lot of fun sketching ideas for this and making it overall, tried to incorporate a few little things from Sun's coat bc it's SUCH a fun design like asdkfhs (didn't know sun in a big coat was everything i needed in life but APPARENTLY, i was wrong)

also, wrote a brief little synopsis/drabble below to provide a little context ^-^

i hope you enjoy!! merry christmas & happy holidays!!!

(drabble & process pics below the cut)

The lights are bright, and even from here you can feel their warmth. Usually it would be more of a comfort to you, but at this moment it feels almost too much. The music plays from the speakers, having been given a recent touch up after months of begging for improved equipment. There's little chatter from the audience, they're far too invested in the performance, which again would be a great thing if your nerves weren't on fire. 

Your eyes flick back to the animatronic in front of you, not moving even a centimeter out of place, waiting for your cue. Though really, it's the shift in the song, you almost think that regardless of whether you were ready or not he would pull you into the spotlight to complete the scene.

He knows his role, ever the perfect performer, as he was made to be. The role of the Nutcracker is fitting, in a way, for him. While obviously not a prince cursed to take on the role of toy solider, you imagine being locked away in a closet for several years provides a similar experience. 

You take a deep breath, you've been preparing weeks for this. Months really, when you consider how long it's taken to get to this point, to an actual show. You can't let them down, can't let yourself down. All the hard work, the re-imagining, the late nights spent debating, sewing, painting, chatting, maybe even bonding—all of it leads to this. It's amazing how a few seconds can last for hours.

The song lifts, you take his hand. 

And so it begins.

hehehe, anywho, process and such is here for those who care to see it :D

close up & sun only version

lineart & flats

rendering pt 1

background & lineless lol

bonus: version with less hand cropped bc it turned out so beautiful~

[deusvervewrites]

This is actually related to an ongoing problem I've noticed in the fandom space that I refer to as the infantilization of Midoriya. Things like the idea that he doesn't know how to swear or that he's somehow ignorant of sex ed when no one else is, etc.

The former, I don't see as infantilizing, there's people that just don't know how to swear but are still shown as mature. In fact, in an old military sci-fi novel the protagonist admired his drill sergeant BECAUSE he didn't swear yet he was extremely creative, articulated and offensive with reaming up the recruits (if the sergeant actually broke out actual swearwords, the recruit had just pulled a stunt that could get his own side killed in actual combat and will get them at minimum flogged). And in real life, Rome's dialect is infamous around Italy for using swearwords in normal speech (with such gems as a mother calling her own son a "son of a whore" to add LIGHT EMPHASIS) while the actual insults tend to contain little to no swearwords (to give one example, "you had snot for brains, then you blew your nose").

For being ignorant of sex... That I find laughable. He was a teen with an internet connection and basically no friends. I like to imagine him as knowing about sex, and simply having enough basic human decency not to talk about it when inappropriate.

It's not so much the idea of a character who doesn't swear, or who doesn't know how, but the idea that Midoriya grew up around Bakugou and still doesn't understand that kind of language. Hell, if I remember correctly, the Japanese language doesn't actually have many swears in it, rather, it has extremely disrespectful forms of address. Like, if I'm remembering correctly, usually when someone in anime/manga calls someone a bastard, the direct translation would be, "You!!"

[prettyboykatsuki]

tw for very very brief mentions of rape and incest and other taboo subject matter - only brought up for discussion.

i feel like it is kind of beating a dead horse when i bring up the relationship between fiction, reality, and the exploration of dark/taboo. given the nature of my blog and the change it's made over time—it's brought up repeatedly many times and in many context in which im forced to defend.

outside of that though, i have never really taken a moment to thoroughly break down the reason (or one of them) i find the it important which is the idea of fictional exploration as a sort of third space of processing and development.

there are many arguments surrounding the exploration of taboo relationships, ideas, and incidents in fiction built on the basis of morals. our greater, societal infrastructure relies on the idea of morality to justify any and all material violence. whether that violence be physical harm, systemic injustice, or psychological / verbal abuse etc.

there's a quote by frank bidart that goes "you can convince human beings to do anything if you convince them it is moral" that i think of often when we debate about what is moral and why. all people are equally capable of committing great material harm to other people if they are under the impression they are in the moral right.

so you examine morality as a mechanism for forming social contracts. it is largely debated whether or not morality is subjective or objective - but regardless of either thing, it is a fundamental part of creating a social circle. big or small.

human beings are also naturally social creatures. we want the approval and attention of our peers and we want community. and it will cause us to act in ways, whether that be conscious or unconscious, that are unsavory. whether that be passivitiy to maintain the status quo or othering another person in order to gain social status or favor.

a lot of the people who are staunchly against any forms of taboo in the exploration of fiction are people engaging with this kind of social behavior. at the core of there reasoning, they are seeking solace with peers over a sense of moral superiority all while not contributing anything materially—except often the verbal abuse and harassment of the opposite party.

none of this is very novel for me to point out. there are also plenty of other things that contribute to why this kind of debate happens online so frequently, particularly a strong taboo towards any all sexual content stemming from old-school religious conservatism and other fascist ideas etc.

but i bring it up because of how it relates to my feelings about the concept of fiction as a sort of third space in the same way the internet is a sort of third space.

engaging in this kind of moral crusading online is done by people who are seeking out social spaces that connect them to other people. this is especially true online as the internet has become a third space for people to interact with others that share similar interest and views. they do this to have a space to reaffirm themselves and their morality.

most importantly, they do this because the internet is an easily accessible space to like-mindedness and self-assurance. it's unreliability is overshadowed by the fact that young people engaging in this kind of critique can get ahold of their peers easily this way. humans are social. they seek companionship and our real life third spaces have become more and more sparse over the years.

so, online spaces have become a place for people to process their social development and their emotions with their peers.

now there's an understanding—that people need a way to process their internal world, concepts and ideas somehow.

but there are social contracts that can't be broken in these online spaces. though they are meant to be an escape from the constraints of real life, you are still subject to scrutiny and at risk of becoming a bad actor that is shunned by their own online community and circle of friends.

on top of that, if human beings are capable of committing horrific acts of violence, they are just as capable and if not more, of experiencing that violence in their lives. this also requires processing similar to the normal, everyday social processing people do online.

this much is obvious, even to many people who oppose the idea that fiction doesn't equal reality. you'll often hear them utter words about seeking counseling / therapy underneath posts involving dark subject matter.

but then, there are social contracts of acceptability and palatability. and more, there is inaccessibility.

all human beings are subject to some form of violence or some other type of struggle. whether that be in their class, race, or sexuality - the average person has material conditions and complex emotions that can't be neatly resolved nor shared comfortably with their peers.

everyone needs space to air these aspects of themselves out healthily. you are automatically going to experience a specific amount of negativity in your life that requires an outlet and there is no real way to find a universal solution to answering those feelings. unresolved, it can lead to substance abuse or suicidal thoughts/

and there is no universal, easy to access place for people to unilaterally express and process their feelings and thoughts.

but there is writing fiction.

this, to me, is the one argument that i think is important to bring it up but rarely does. because there are many angles to approach this discourse and this is just one of them.

writing is also a kind of third space. a place to communicate that isn't home or work. a third space in to connect with and break down these emotions—somewhere that can be shared to find camaraderie. it can also be shielded to hide away from the scrutiny of your peers. it is a place where you can inadvertently process these great, overbearing emotions that is neutral and welcome to all.

and it's not that fiction can't cause harm at all. because it certainly can and has

but the very presence of taboo is not the sole cause of harm in what makes something fictional hurtful. propaganda and insensitive messaging and all the ways fiction can hurt people exist with in a predefined context and social climate. that kind of harm spreads through massive scales of government and print and makes its way onto shelves.

more than that, human beings have a sense of morality. it is agreed upon that rape, incest, violence and murder are materially harmful. in the misplaced desire for censorship, it seems people are attempting to affirm this by monitoring works of fiction that have this subject matter at all.

but in that monitoring, you are taking away what makes these kinds of spaces comfortable - which is a lack of hostility.

if you believe this to be the most optimum solution, i implore you to critically examine whether or not you think it morally correct to take away from someone the means to process their emotions. and if you believe still, that it's the best thing to do for all parties i next ask, how will you then make space for them? what space will replace this one?

what are the other solutions have the same level of access to all? can you implement a space for someone with no other healthy outlets, to vent and untangle and smooth out these feelings, without requiring the hypothetical labor of someone else? can you promise you will be able to provide something that offers a similar catharsis for the often deeply complicated feelings being addressed (whether that be directly or indirectly) through the presence of themes like incest, rape, or abuse? can you provide another alternative to the repetitive behaviors of trauma that insist on recreating / imagining these harms in a controlled environment over and over again?

to be clear, it is unnecessary and against my beliefs that you must have experience those things directly to write about them. in fact my point is the opposite.

the thematic concepts that come along with the taboos are the catharsis themselves. a person with a disconnected trauma about neglect or abandonment finding healing in the themes of incest about forbidden love or love that goes against all. a person with no trauma at all, who longs to be free from the daily life stresses of work may find catharsis in the writing of rape which strips autonomy and choice.

human beings are complicated. these examples may feel extreme to you. you are welcome to view them that way. that is your right.

but for other people it is a good solution, one of the best solutions - to strip down these desires bare and explore them where no one is being hurt. where they do not hurt themselves materially or anyone else. art is one of the few spaces you have for yourself. you can argue that distribution is the problem—but if you are able to identify when it is wrong, does your moral superiority extend so far as to believe that that's something only you can do?

and most importantly - are you prepared to take that space from them and provide other outlets? do you think it fair to prevent people from safely having access to something that you, yourself, depend on heavily for social and emotional affirmation?

are you willing to hold space for them when no one else can or no one else will?

[alatismeni-theitsa]

It belongs there for sure! I'm the last person to expect a foreigner to know about the Odyssey. But it's surely weird how many people have never heard of what The Odyssey is when their nations (like the UK and the US) have made it their mission to cosplay as "the rightful heirs of ancient Greek civilization". The people who wonder about it are certainly not pretentious. The Odyssey is close to the Bible in popularity in the West.

We didn't read a single Shakespeare play in Greek school either but I still know he's not a USAmerican writer. And I believe the majority or Greeks know this as well. Sure there are a few Greeks who may have no idea of Shakespeare's ethnicity. In cases such as these it would be great to admit "hey I didn't pay enough attention to cultural events all these years" and google that shit before writing something profoundly stupid online.

I think it's fine for people to wonder "how did you not know what the Odyssey is" because that means you didn't pay attention to cartoons, children's books, movies, plays, reenactments, retellings, ancient Greek museum exhibitions, documentary about Greek antiquity, bookstore sales on Greek mythology books etc etc.

The media on this Epic is so many that people rightfully wonder why someone hasn't heard of it. I'm not saying it's a crime not to have heard of it but let's not pretend this ignorance is the norm.

And before you come at me, the first two times I, a Greek in Greece, saw anything Odyssey-related was via a USAmerican movie and a French cartoon. We're talking about media with a wide reach on this side of the world, which are difficult to miss.

So before being so proud as to declare "I don't know what that shit is / don't expect everyone to know about it" take a minute and google it 🤷‍♀️ And don't hit me with the shit "they didn't teach us that in school". School is over, kiddo, and it's your sole responsibility to learn useful information about things your country considers important.

(edit: In case this isn't obvious, I'm mostly speaking about western countries here. It wouldn't be as a shocker if someone from - for example - Myanmar, went "Hey what's this Odyssey about?" People understand that the distance and history of one's nation play a role in what books they're exposed to)

I’m living for The Odyssey discourse on Twitter right now because some people are like, “You’ve never heard of the odyssey” and other people are like, “some people don’t speak English and haven’t read your little American book.”

[mjbarrosart]

My Dragon Prince Boards season 7, episode 705, part 1

It's time to talk about my boards for episode 705 of the last season of The Dragon Prince. I did a lot of stuff in this episode, so instead of going in order, I'll divide my work differently for this one, we will talk by group of sequences and not in order of appearance.

Let's start with the sunfire elf side of the plot. As a lot of you know, most of my work in this show was related to the Sunfire elves, and to be honest Janai and Amaya are two of my favorite characters of the show, so every chance to work with them is always a bless.

I did all the scenes of Karim talking with Amaya in this episode. It is hard to explain how I feel about Karim, he is such an idiot, but I am also kinda fond of him because I spent so many hours working on him thinking about his mannerism and motivations. I am fond of him, but I also hate him, hahahaha.

There is not a lot to say about this sequences, they are pretty straight forward. While I can understand why Karim hates humans so much, that doesn't mean he is right about it, and this hate is starting to feel like pettiness, and well fits him, he is a really petty man.

Let! Green! Say! Ass! hahahaha. Its always funny to board this kind of little jokes. I love Green and Amaya dynamics, they are such good friends, and I love how Green is always making sure that Amaya's bluntness is not coming out as "rude". But sometimes I feel he should just translate directly what Amaya is saying, because I don't think Karim deserves special considerations, haha.

That little speech Karim does about how he and Amaya are not the same was interesting to board for me. I wanted him to feel aggressive and menacing, even if his hands were tied. Like he was trying to intimidate Amaya, but she will not bend, she can see thru his BS. I wanted him to trespass into Amaya's personal space, portrait him as the bully he is. He says that his faith comes from knowledge, while the truth is that he leads using fear. Such a pathetic little man.

Another instance where is wish the rigs where able to translate between the expressions from the boards. I wanted him to spit his words trough his teeth when he says "humans are vermin, a plague", like his mouth is full of poison and hate.

But the Amaya, who is mostly motivated by making sure that Janai doesn't regrets the decision of killing her brother, does the right thing and reminds him of the fact that Miyana is pregnant, that there is a future worth to live for. Karim shows some doubts, so Amaya leaves and Miyana enters the stage.

I feel kinda bad for Miyana. I mean she deserves the punishment she got, at the end of the day she betrayed her people. But I feel bad for her, because I think that she honestly loves Karim. Imagine loving such a foolish man. And Karim can not learn a lesson, he keeps being an idiot. He is offered a second chance to be with his family, but the only thing he can see in Miyana is that she is carrying "his heir", and Miyana is right of being offended by that. But she wants to believe that he will made the right choice. And maybe for a minute Karim ponders it. I wanted him to loot vulnerable and maybe open in the final shot, so I made him kneel close to Miyana, laying his head on her belly, close to his child. We know how this will end for him, but for a moment there is maybe hope that he will change... no?

My next scene in this episode is one I am really fond of. Is the one when Terry says that the only person who can stop Claudia is her mom, and Soren is really against that idea.

First, is always fun to have a moment with Terry. I have really small ones during my work in the show, so this one was a blast. Second, I got to have another emotional Soren moment, and that is always nice, because Sores in my boy.

The back and forth of this conversation is pretty straight forward too. What was important for me was what will be the moment that will make Soren change his mind, and support the idea. So I decided to use Corvus for this.

Soren is struggling with the idea of bringing her mother back, even if that means they will have a real shot making Claudia stop. Corvus see his pain, and touch his shoulder. We talked before on how touching is a love language between this two, they don't need tons of words. Corvus is saying "I know that it's hard, but I am here with you". On my boards I had him giving Soren a little nod, they removed that for the final shot, and I think is ok. The nod is not necessary, Soren understand what Corvus means. With his support Soren can do it.

So he gathers strength and gives the drawing to Ezran. I like that in the animation stage they kept Corvus hand all the time on his shoulder. For Soren the idea of facing his mom is one full of pain and conflicted feelings, but he doesn't need to face it alone, he has Corvus at his side (as a partner, friend, soulmate, brother, whatever you see them being).

I love them so much...

The second part of this post is about the last sequence I did for this episode, it is a small one, but one that you could say... brings a "surprise"!

I will posted right away, so stay tuned!

[applestorms]

@jessaerys ok shit this took a while but WHATEVER. wammy's lore collection here we go :3c less analysis this time, this is mostly just to archive the main known details we have in canon about the house, and also the people from there more generally. however much you wanna accept all this/take it at face value is up to You, Dear Reader (and tbh y'all should just read all these if ur curious since they're all pretty short + have Interesting narrators. i'll include links to free versions). do whatever you want forever etc. etc. also, SPOILERS. obviously.

LABB: (listen here)

no this book isn't written by ohba. yes i'm including it. shush. anyways, most of the lore in this comes from mello's vague comments about beyond's backstory, but there's a Lot of interesting things established in this, so. here's a bunch of notable quotes. if you're not already familiar, please keep in mind that the narrator of this novel is mello, writing at some point shortly before his death.

"L. The century's greatest detective. In light of his staggering mental abilities, L died an unjust and untimely death. In the public record alone he solved over 3,500 difficult crimes, and sent three times that number of degenerates to prison. He wielded incredible power, was able to mobilize every investigative bureau in the entire world, and was applauded generously for his efforts. And during it all, he never showed his face." (pg. 10)

"So, what you're reading now are my notes about L. It's a dying message, not from me, and not directed at the world. The person who will most likely read this first will probably be that big-headed twit Near. But if that's the case, I will not tell him to shred or burn these pages. If it causes him pain to discover that I knew things about L that he did not, then that's fine." (pg. 10-11)

"I am one of the few people who ever met L as L. When and how I met him...this is the single most valuable memory I have, and I will not write it here, but on that occasion L related to me three stories of his exploits, and the episode involving Beyond Birthday was one of these." (pg. 11)

"Obviously, it never came to light that L--and more importantly, Wammy's House, which raised me until I was fifteen--was deeply connected to the matter, but in fact, they were. L, on principle, never got involved in a case unless there were more than ten victims or a million dollars at stake, and this is the real reason why he belatedly, but aggressively, involved himself in this little case, which only ever had three or four victims. I will explain further in the pages that follow, but for this reason, the case of the Los Angeles BB murders is a watershed event for L, for me, and even for Kira. It was a monumental event for all of us. Why? Because this is the case where L first introduced himself as Ryuzaki." (pg. 11)

"For any one else but those two [Near and Kira], my identity may be of no interest, but I am the old world's runner-up, the best dresser that died like a dog, Mihael Keehl. I once called myself Mello and was addressed by that name, but that was a long time ago. Good memories and nightmares." (pg. 12)

"She [Naomi Misora] briefly considered the idea that Raye Penber, or someone else, was playing a practical joke on her, but she found it hard to believe that anyone would be so bold to sign their name as such. L never revealed himself in public or in private, but Misora had heard several horror stories about what happened to detectives who tried passing themselves off as L. It was safe to say that no one would dare use his name, even in jest." (pg. 18)

"This was L, so he was undoubtedly solving several other difficult cases all at once. Cases all over the world. For him, this case was just one of many parallel investigations. How else could he maintain his reputation as the world's greatest detective? The century's greatest detective, L. The detective with no clients." (pg. 35)

"L had earned a certain degree of hostility from other detectives, and the jealous ones called him a hermit detective, or a computer detective, but neither of these is a particularly accurate representation of the truth. Naomi Misora had also tended to think of L as an armchair detective, but in fact, L was quite the opposite, a very active, aggressive individual. [swoon.] While he had absolutely no interest in social connections, he was certainly not the kind of detective to shut himself up in a dark room with the shades drawn and refuse to come out. It is now common knowledge that the three great post war detectives, L, Eraldo Coil and Danuve were all actually the same person. Certainly, anyone reading these notes is almost certain to know...though they may not know that L engaged in a war with the real Eraldo Coil, and the real Danuve, and emerged victorious, claiming their detective codes. The details of this detective war I will save for another occasion, but in addition to those three names, L possessed many other detective codes. I have no idea how many, but there were at least three digits' worth. And quite a number of those were fairly public detectives--just like, as anyone reading these notes must know, he appeared before Kira, calling himself Ryuzaki or Ryuga Hideki. Of course, Naomi Misora had no way of knowing this, but in my opinion, the name L was, for him, just one of many. He never had any direct connection to that identity, he never thought of himself as L--it was just the most famous and most powerful of the many detective codes he used during his life. The name had its uses, but lacked obscurity. L had a real name that nobody knew, and nobody will ever know, but a name which only he knew never defined him. I sometimes wonder if L himself ever knew exactly which name was written in the Death Note, which name it was that killed him. I wonder." (pg. 43-44)

"If we must discuss why L so adamantly refused to reveal himself, we can explain it very simply: doing so was dangerous. Very dangerous. While the world leaders should make efforts to ensure the safety of all the finest minds, not only for detectives, the fact is that the current societal systems do not allow for this, and L believed he had no choice but to protect his mind under his own power. By simple arithmetic, L's ability in 2002 was the equivalent of five ordinary investigative bureaus, and seven intelligence agencies (and by the time he faced off against Kira, those numbers had leapt upward several more notches). This is easy to think of as a reason to respect and admire someone, but let me say this as clearly as possible: that much ability in one human is extremely dangerous. Modern danger management techniques rely heavily on defusing risk, but his very existence was the exact opposite. In other words, if someone was planning to commit a crime, they would greatly increase their chances of getting away with it by simply killing L before they began. That was why L hid his identity. Not because he was shy, or because he never left the house. To ensure his own safety. For a detective of L's ability, self-preservation and the preservation of world peace were one and the same, and it would not be correct to describe his actions as cowardly or self-centered." (pg. 69 nice)

"So whenever L was working, he would usually have someone else as his public face--and in this particular case, the FBI agent Naomi Misora was filling that role." (pg. 70)

"Beyond Birthday had the eyes of a shinigami congenitally. It was not particularly difficult for him to track down people with the initials B.B. or find people who were fated to die on a certain day at a certain time." (pg. 94)

"Normally contact with a shinigami was a prerequisite for acquisition, but Beyond Birthday had traded nothing--he had seen through those eyes since before he could remember. He knew your name before you said it. He knew the time of death of every person he met." (pg. 94)

"You might think [the eyes] would hardly be useful without a Death Note, but that is simply not the case. The ability to see someone's remaining life is the ability to see death. Death, death, death. Beyond Birthday lived his life unceasingly reminded that all humans would eventually die. From the time he was born he knew the day his father would be attacked by a thug and die, knew the day his mother would die in a train crash. He had these eyes before he was born, which is why he called himself Beyond Birthday. Which is why a child as strange as he was taken in by our home, sweet home--Wammy's House. He was B. The second child in Wammy's House." (pg. 94-95)

"The competition between L and B. L and B's puzzle. 'If L's a genius, then B's an extreme genius. If L's a freak, then B's an extreme freak. Now it's time to get ready. There are things I must do before B can surpass L. Henh henh henh henh.' This thought was the only thing that made him laugh without needing to think about it. And those that know will recognize the laugh of the shinigami. Still grinning to himself, he faced the mirror, brushed his hair, and began applying his makeup. The reflection of himself in the mirror. Himself. As always, he could not see his own time of death. No more than he could see the death of the world." (pg. 96)

"We were raised at Wammy's House in England, in Winchester, as L's successors, as L's alternatives, but that does not mean we knew anything more about L than anyone else. Including myself, only a few of us ever met L as L, and even I knew nothing about L before he met Watari--Quillish Wammy, the genius inventor who founded Wammy's House. Nobody knows what's going on in L's head. But even so, I know how Watari felt. Looking at L's incredible talents from the perspective of an inventor--of course he wanted to make a copy, of course he wanted to create a backup. Anyone would feel the same. As I have already explained, L never appeared in public. L knew that his own death would increase the crime rate all over the world by a few dozen percentage points. But what if they could copy him? What if they could make a backup? That was us. L's children, gathered from all corners of the world.

"But even for a genius like Watari, creating a fake L was easier said than done. Even for Near and I, who were said to be the closest to L...the more we tried to be like him, the closer we got, the father away he was, like chasing a mirage. So I hardly need to tell you what it was like when Wammy's House was first founded, when he was still experimenting. The first child, A, was unable to handle the pressure of living up to L and took his own life, and the second child, Beyond Birthday, was brilliant and deviant. B stood for Backup.

"But B tried to surpass L, not become him...no, that might not be right. I have no way of knowing the inner workings of his mind. He...their generation was not like the fourth generation, with Near and I, all the children bound only to the code with the serial L. They were prototypes, never even given the L code, expected to fail. I prefer to refrain from idle speculation based on my own experiences, but, well, Beyond Birthday may have thought something like this: As long as there was L, B would never be L. As long as the original existed, the copy was always a copy." (pg. 104-105)

"The Los Angeles BB Murder Cases. L.A.B.B.--L is After Beyond Birthday. This reading is why I think this name is so much closer to the killer's intentions than the Wara Ningyo Murders, or the Los Angeles Serial Locked Room Killings. I wasn't talking about the names on a purely stylistic basis. Whether Beyond Birthday had put that much thought into it I have no idea, but if he had a specific reason for choosing to commit his murders in L.A., then that is probably why. I am sure he had a much more personal obsession with L as an individual than Near or I ever did. I can understand why someone would become a criminal in order to fight against a detective, which is why I can write something like this, but even so. What did he hope to accomplish by killing unrelated people? Or perhaps B simply wanted to meet L. Then he could use the eyes of the shinigami he'd been born with and see L's real name, see when L would die. He would be able to figure out who L was. Beyond Birthday had never told anyone that he had the eyes of a shinigami, and it would not surprise me at all if he believed himself to be some kind of shinigami." (pg. 105-106)

"Beyond Birthday challenged L. And L accepted the challenge. To put it bluntly, the Los Angeles BB Murder Cases were nothing but an internal struggle, a civil war within our home, sweet home-- Wammy's House. Unfortunate for the victims that got mixed up in it, but even if Beyond Birthday had not killed them, all those victims were fated to die that day, at that time, for some other reason, so logically and morally, their deaths were unavoidable. So in the strictest sense of the word, the only one who really got mixed up in their war was Naomi Misora." (pg. 106)

"L was said to never move on a case unless there were more than ten victims or a million dollars at stake. The only exceptions to this were cases at difficulty level L (extremely fitting), or when L had personal reasons compelling him to get involved. The Los Angeles BB Murders were both of these. I hardly need to point out the difficulty by this stage of the story, and L was essentially fighting his own dead copy. [harsh, dude.] The current head of Wammy's House had told Quillish Wammy/Watari, who had told L about B's disappearance in May, and ever since L had been looking for him even as he solved other cases. Wammy's House only knew him as B--they did not know his real name, Beyond Birthday, so this search was near impossible, but L knew who the killer was. He had not been looking for a killer so much as he was looking for a case. L had been waiting, expecting Beyond Birthday to do something to challenge him. L could move any policeman in the world, but in this case, he could not ask anyone for help except Naomi Misora...more than likely, for this reason. I don't think L really put that much stock in honor, but everyone is embarrassed by their own sins, and nobody wants those missteps to become public knowledge. L was the goal of everyone in Wammy's House. Every one of us wanted to surpass him. To step over him. To step on him. M did, N did, and B did. M as a challenger, N as a successor. B as a criminal." (pg. 116-117)

"No matter what she did, she had no way of knowing. That this killer, Beyond Birthday, could tell someone's name and time of death just by looking at their face, that he had been born with the eyes of a shinigami--she had no way of knowing that fake names were useless with him, completely and utterly pointless. How could she have known? Even Beyond Birthday himself could not explain how he had been born with the eyes of the shinigami, how he could use them with no payment, with no arrangement. Neither Misora nor L knew why, and, obviously, neither do I. The closest thing to an explanation I can offer is that there are shinigami stupid enough to drop their notebooks in our world, so there might well be shinigami stupid enough to drop their eyes." (pg. 193-140)

"'So, Naomi Misora...' said L, wrapping up. But Misora hastily stammered, 'Um, er, L...' but then she hesitated, not sure if she should ask this or not. 'You...know the killer, right?' 'Yes, as I said. He is B.' 'I don't mean like that...I mean, he's someone you know personally?' On the 16th, L had said that he had known the killer was B, and she had sort of known ever since, but two days before, L had said something that changed her guess to conviction. Whatever you do, please catch the killer. The century's greatest detective, L, would never say that about some ordinary indiscriminate serial killer. And the way his letter was just one letter long... 'Yes,' the synthetic voice agreed." (pg. 144-145)

"'I have nothing to do with him,' L said. 'To be completely accurate, I do not even know B. He is simply someone I am aware of. But none of this affects my judgement. Certainly, I was interested in this case, and began to investigate it because I knew who the killer was. But that did not alter the way I investigated it, or the manner in which my investigation proceeded. Naomi Misora, I cannot overlook evil. I cannot forgive it. It does not matter if I know the person who commits evil or not. I am only interested in justice.'" (pg. 145)

"My great and respected predecessor, the man whose actions were a strong influence on me personally, B, B.B., Beyond Birthday--obviously, I need hardly explain again that the murders themselves were not his purpose. So what was he doing? Again, I hardly need to explain--he was challenging the man he copied, the century's greatest detective L. A matter of winning or losing. A contest." (pg. 159)

"Since L could solve every case no matter how challenging, if he created a case so difficult that L as unable to solve it, B would have defeated L." (pg. 159)

"He knew that the moment he took action Wammy's House and Watari would alert L, so he did not even bother trying to stop them. He could only guess at which stage of his plan L would start to come after him, so he prepared things carefully, ready for L's entrance at any point." (pg. 159)

"B approached Naomi Misora, calling himself Rue Ryuzaki. Rue Ryuzaki--L.L. For anyone from Wammy's House, there could be no higher goal than identifying yourself with that letter--and Beyond Birthday seized this case as his chance. even Naomi Misora knew what had happened to detectives falsely identifying themselves as L, and B was from Wammy's House, so he knew this better than anyone--so this choice suggests the strength of his decision. He never once intended to survive--had had made up his mind. He was ready." (pg. 160) [trans. note: the name "Rue" in Japanese, ルエ (ru-e), is an anagram of エル (e-ru), which is how L is pronounced.]

"Naturally, his face and fingerprints would burn as well--he had always disguised himself with heavy makeup while he was with Misora, and he never left a picture behind, so even if someone directly affiliated with Wammy's House inspected the body, they would have no idea that Rue Ryuzaki/Beyond Birthday was B from Wammy's House. He had left nothing to connect Beyond Birthday to B." (pg. 162)

"B was presenting the Los Angeles BB Murder Cases to L as a case that could never be solved. That L could never solve. In other words, he had never prepared any clear solution to it--since the killer had committed suicide, disguised as the fourth victim, there was no longer a killer to catch, and no clues left to catch him with." (pg. 163)

"My poor, poor predecessor. Not only was he utterly and completely defeated, but he survived, driving home his embarrassment...he must have longed for death. Accept my condolences, B." (pg. 169-170)

"If I had space left over I had intended to carry right on into the other two stories I heard from L: the story of the detective war between the three greatest detectives, all solving that infamous bio-terror case, with guest appearances by the last of the alphabet, the first X to the first Z from Wammy's House; and the story of how the world's greatest inventor, Quillish Wammy, aka Watari, had first met L, then about eight year's old--the case that gave birth to the century's greatest detective, the Winchester Mad Bombings that occurred just after the third World War. But however objectively I look at things, I do not have the space or the time. Oh well." (pg. 170)

"She had spoken to L only once after the killer was arrested. He thanked her for helping to solve the case, and told her just a little about the background of the case. That B had been a candidate to succeed L, and that the pressure of that had driven him off track." (pg. 171)

"And a few years after his arrest, on January 21st, 2004, serving a life sentence in a California prison, Beyond Birthday died of a mysterious heart attack." (pg. 173)

C-KIRA: (read here)

near grief :pensive: pretty sure this was animated in the anime movie thing?? tbh i still need to watch that. Very interesting as some of the most recent post-main story lore we get about wammy's imo. less quotes now + more summarizing since these are just comics

near has apparently only "talked" to L once (in quotes since he didn't actually say anything, just sat in the back of the room doing a puzzle the entire time. real asf girl)

during this "conversation," roger or one of the orphanage heads set up the usual L screen + a camera/mic so that L could see all the kids and answer their questions.

notably, mello & near didn't ask any questions, just lurked in the back watching L with a "nasty look in [their] eyes," which near assumes is what made him pick them to be his top successors, considering the fact that he didn't actually look at any of their data. (somewhat seems to imply that L didn't actually give a shit about grades or anything like that when picking his main successors?)

while answering questions, near is caught off guard by one of L's answers. to transcribe it all directly here--

NEAR (NARRATING): At the time, I didn't think L would put it so bluntly. L: It's not a sense of justice. L: Figuring out difficult cases is my hobby. If you measured good and evil deeds by current laws, I would be responsible for many crimes. L: The same way you all like to solve mysteries and riddles, or clear video games more quickly... For me too, its simply prolonging something I enjoy doing. L: That's why I only take on cases that pique my interest. It's not justice at all. And if it means being able to clear a case, I don't play fair, I'm a dishonest, cheating human being, who hates losing...

not quite the monster speech, but fascinating all the same. near seems to imply that this answer sent some kids into a despair spiral, but it actually caused him to like L more and more, feeling that he was, "exactly the kind of person who wanted to achieve his own goals." kinda goes against the HTR13 ohba comment? shrug

The Wammy's House/L's One Day: (read here)

honestly i interpret these comics as like. canon crack fic. but anyways, here's the established L lore included in these two.

L was taken into wammy's as a nameless orphan at an unknown but likely quite young age

very soon after arriving he beats up all the other kids he meets--

he is "utterly incompatible," with all the other kids and monopolizes all the things he likes simply cause he's stronger than them and presumably could fight them for it-- naturally, he ends up usually just playing by himself

notably, this all establishes that L isn't the first kid at wammy's, that there was already at least one generation of older kids living there before he got there (and could eventually turn it into an L successor creating machine)

once watari realizes that L has some outstanding mental abilities, he gives him his own private room and a computer. afterwards, L spends most of his time sitting in front of the puter by himself

L requests that watari buy 1 million pounds with Japanese yen and tells him which stocks to buy, causing his assets to reach "almost 20,000 times the original amount," in two years. visually this is depicted as happening when L is still quite young

several years later, L stumbles across a serial murder case in the news, which is the first he solves, starting his new career path

-

L can stay awake for 100+ hours and then gets over it by sleeping for like 17 hours. pictures also may imply that he doesn't actually sleep in a bed, but just lies down sideways in his chair. RIP yotsuba light's perfectly designed sleep schedule

L also shits/pisses in the same position he usually sits in (frog-pose), facing the tank south park style

he is a big fan of cleanliness!! human washing machine etc. etc. honestly i think this is just another way for him to hold that same crouched position

text says he always has, "ten or so identical sets of clothes prepared for him," since he's picky about it, but the art itself shows way more than ten. also rare shirtless L moment?? (watari helps)

L does in fact go outside!! he likes roller coasters/theme parks, swinging, art galleries, live music, etc. though most of the time he just sits in his room thinking thru shit n solving cases.

[autism-autobot]

FloaPS Facts 5

Red Son and Wukong Edition!

Tw: grief, child neglect, coma, near-death experience, mentions of death

Wukong's fur has fallen out on multiple occasions due to grief and stress. He naturally sheds fur with the seasons, but he has a hard time growing fur back

Most of the fur loss is contained to his limbs, but he has a few bald patches on his torso as well

Red Son noticed that Wukong didn't seem to particularly enjoy his furless look, so he bought a henna tattoo kit and offered to draw on him if he liked

Red Son and Wukong now have "henna & spa" days together where they bathe, braid hair, and draw henna on each other

They will both draw wherever the other is comfortable, which is basically everywhere except the privates

Wukong is better at drawing henna than Red Son

DBK once saw Red Son with his hair braided and henna covering every inch of skin aside from his face, looked at his son, and said, "Your uncle got ahold of you, didn't he?"

Wukong used to babysit Red Son on the regular

Wukong loves belly dancing

Red Son used to watch Wukong belly dance as a toddler and would sometimes try to copy him

Wukong noticed and decided to give him belly dancing lessons

Red Son got really good at it and looked forward to every lesson

Despite how proficient Red Son was at it, he was too shy and embarrassed to do it in front of anyone, but Wukong and his husband

After his father's imprisonment, Red Son was forced to cut all ties with Wukong and stopped belly dancing as a result

It was only recently that Red Son worked up the courage to ask for more dance lessons, but by then, Wukong was too weak from his sickness to dance

Wukong is intersex and genderfluid (still uses he/him pronouns as he tends to fluctuate towards masculinity)

Wukong was the one to carry and birth each of his children from both of his past marriages

Red Son used to see Wukong belly dancing while in his third trimester and thought nothing of it at the time. Now, he questions how Wukong was ever capable of such a thing

Wukong's kids would refer to Macaque as Baba

His kids didn't want to refer to their new step-dad as "Baba" because in their minds, Macaque had dragged that name through mud and other discusting materials and Ao Lie deserved better, they decided to call him Pom-pom.

Red Son thought Pom-pom was his actual name until Wukong clarified it on New Years that he was, in fact, Ao Lie and not some random other dragon that he decided to build a life with

"I'm glad I got the opportunity to meet most of the pilgrims, though I do wish I could've met Ao Lie too." "What are you talking about? You've met him!" "Wait, I have?" "Pom-pom? Do you not remember him? Please tell me you remember him!" "WAIT POM-POM IS AO LIE???!!!"

Then came the talk of "No, Mei is not related to me, she's a descendant of one of my step-kids" and "No, my kids aren't considered part of the dragon clan since they don't approve of me or of Lie's divorce to his previous spouse"

Monkeys often sleep together, so whenever Red Son spent the night at Wukong's house, he'd sleep in a ginormous bed with every member of Wukong's family

At one point, Red Son started spending more days of the year being babysat by Wukong than with his parents. He still doesn't know why

Red Son feels extremely lonely whenever he has to sleep alone, which is often, though he never dares to try climbing into his parents' bed with them

Wukong had a workshop where he'd invented all kinds of gadgets

Red Son took an interest in this, and you can figure out where that led him

The gauntlet was Wukong's idea, but no one knows except them, and they'll never tell

Wukong drew the blueprints, and Red Son prayed that his mother wouldn't recognize the handwriting. She didn't notice

The reason Wukong didn't remove the staff himself was because heaven would get mad and threaten to hurt DBK and his family all over again

If anyone laid an ill-meaning hand on his nephew, Wukong would snap their neck in an instant

He apologized for punching Red Son while possessed by LBD. Red Son held him to no blame

The longest that Red Son has ever stayed at Wukong's house is three years straight

Wukong lectured both DBK and PIF about being present in their child's life after this

They were part of Red Son's life after that, at least until DBK's imprisonment

PIF wasn't very active in Red Son's life after that, and Red Son didn't go to Wukong for help for fear of his mother's wrath

Red Son basically spent anywhere between 85-92% of his childhood without his parents being there for him physically and/or emotionally

Meanwhile, Wukong was heartbroken from the deaths of the pilgrims (especially Ao Lie), and since he can't die of heartbreak, he spent ~400ish years in a coma, instead

Red Son knew that Wukong was in a coma, but his parents didn't find out until long after the fact

Wukong is no longer the only emotionally available person in Red Son's life

Red Son has been scared out of his mind for Wukong since the surgery announcement

Wukong had always seemed like an indestructible and untouchable person to Red Son, and seeing him go through so much has been nearly world shattering for him

Wukong tried his best to reassure him that he'll be fine, but he is almost as scared as his nephew

Red Son suggested that Wukong recover from surgery in the Demon Bull Family Palace, and everyone agreed to the idea

Red Son has been putting together a recovery room for Wukong

The walls are covered in flower murals and filled with soft blankets and pillows

The recovery room looks a lot like the nursery that Ao Lie set up for Wukong when they were expecting their first baby

Wukong loves the recovery room. It's his favorite room in the palace now

4 6

Masterpost

@starrclown @swkbiggestdefender @istopaskingmemate @ainnur @then-be-a-warrior @weaverpop

[melanielocke]

Tbh whatever Viktor is talking about doesn't even have anything to do with evolution. It's not even that he misunderstands evolution, he made up his own thing which is more related to transhumanism and calls that evolution.

Not only does evolution not have a destination, evolution also does not change living organisms, it's much slower than that. So when Viktor is healing people or changing into robots, that has literally nothing to do with evolution. Evolution would be if humans over a long time and many generations turned into his weird robot things because that's the best suited life form for the circumstances (nature's greatest force, forever in flux as Singed says, though I also find his statement a bit weird). Instead, Viktor decided that for humans not to suffer, they must be changed, and calls that glorious evolution, I think largely because that's his game catchphrase. Perhaps because it sounds cooler than glorious transhumanism? Glorious body modifications? Idk.

Perhaps he just calls it glorious evolution because he thought it sounded cool. It might also even be that he wasn't familiar with evolution theory at all (idk about the religious background but he is also making some more religious statements on how he believes in fate, and later he believes the glorious evolution is destined), and only singed knows about normal evolution since it's closer to his field. And then Viktor would use evolution as a much looser term for change, since linguistically evolution can be used in different contexts?

I'm not sure if he truly doesn't understand how evolution theory works (and considering Singed brings it up first, I do presume evolution theory exists in this world), or if he thinks, well, my way is better, but he really needs someone to talk sense into him because his ideas get progressively weirder over the season and letting him have such insane power with only people who worship him and a hexcore to talk to who validates all his weirdest ideas was a bad idea. Some humanities classes would also have helped, because while he understands what human suffering is like largely because of his own experiences, he doesn't understand people at all, and probably assumes what he wanted is what everyone else wants and also what they (and he) need (wrong on both counts).

Interestingly, when Viktor first brings up glorious evolution, he is still unwilling to go through with it (assuming it refers to using Vander to evolve himself, though I do think he also considered the healing he did for his followers glorious evolution), so I think he already had some of these ideas before he even died. Something that had absolutely nothing to do with evolution, but more with his own internalized ableism and believing he needed to fix himself to end his suffering/be worthy of love. He did want it at that point, he just wasn't willing to sacrifice someone else for it. He also only gave up on his hexcore research because it killed Sky. He cared it killed someone. He didn't care it turned his leg weird and purple and was willing to turn his entire body into that if it meant he was cured. (and I believe when he did sacrifice Vander, there was also no possibility of saving him anymore)

Anyway this got long but the conclusion is Viktor has no clue what he's talking about, I don't think he even knows what evolution is, and his entire ideology is shaped from his own internalized ableism and lack of understanding of humanity, and he slapped a cool catchphrase on top without knowing it actually means something else.

nothing viktor did was more peak engineer behavior than when he so confidently explained evolution wrong except for him confidently explaining evolution wrong while disagreeing with the guy who explained it correctly

[laniemae]

Out of the closet

I absolutely cannot get my mind off of Hiroaki coming out as gay so I had to draw this.

Analysis under cut

I have to much to think about this whole scene of Hiroaki coming out of the closet. Starting to think about it, you really come to understand just how important him being gay and closeted is to his character and backstory, especially being a celebrity in Japan.

At first when Hiroaki first admitted he liked guys I was absolutely over the moon, and frankly I still am but it became apparent quickly just how devastating the scene actually was on Hiroaki’s side. It’s clear that Hiroaki felt pressured to come out of the closet like that from how the conversation with Yanagi was escalating. With Yanagi accusing Hiroaki hooking up and dropping out of relationships with all these women for no reason and Hiroaki forcing to admit that the reason things were like that was because he’s gay. He was backed into a corner and forced to come out, even if that wasn’t Yanagi’s intention. Thankfully Yanagi was supportive and understand but Hiroaki’s first time coming out of the closet being in a way like this must’ve been really scary for him, and especially how he broke down crying at the end of the conversation. Because even if he was accepted in this one situation, the feeling of panic and having to admit a personal violation which if he was outside the killing game, would’ve stemmed the end for him, would’ve been incredibly traumatic.

Hiroaki is a celebrity, so the pressure to hide his homosexuality would’ve been even more intense than the average person. Due to the nature of homophobia in Japan, his job very much could’ve been on the line with him forcing to hide being gay. His management team has created out this image for him of him being a ladies man and womaniser constantly hooking him up with relationships with other popular girls. And Hiroaki only adheres to them from the idea of getting popular through followers and stuff. And I can definitely imagine that through hooking up and even sleeping with all these women he’s desperately trying to convince himself that he’s not gay and that it’ll pass in time. Even bragging to Yanagi over all these sexual relations he’s had with over ten women to keep up his image, even though he doesn’t truly care about it because he’s not into women, and never truly loved any of them. And it was only for appearances and PR. And maybe even during that time there could’ve been some rumours of him being gay circulating which could’ve furthered this.

I can’t imagine how uncomfortable it would’ve been for Hiroaki to live a comphet life ike this and Yanagi put this very well. Hiroaki wasn’t born into riches and had to work extremely hard to become the multi millionaire that he is and having the risk of losing all of that over people finding out that he’s gay, I could imagine how scary that would’ve been for him. And why he accepted to doing all this stuff. And in the end when he confessed to Yanagi that he likes guys instead of women, it was probably also him admitting it to himself in a way. That this is a major step in Hiroaki’s arc that has been stemming back for years in his life when he started to realise it.

All of this makes me think back to Hiroaki’s student spotlight near the beginning of chapter 2. Looking back to how he freaked out so much about those questions asking about his relationship with Ojima makes so much sense in retrospect now, knowing that he’s a closeted homosexual. And even though the questions asked weren’t directly related to a potential romantic connection with Ojima he still interpreted it as an accusation and got very defensive and aggressive. Even telling the original asker to get a life and friends. From how much he’s had to hide this part about himself and Hiroaki’s attitude of lashing out at people who get too close to or annoy him, especially in chapter 1. He probably got very uncomfortable and defensive here. And it makes me think if he’s ever been accused like this in his personal life. And how distressing it must be to him of the idea of people looking into his life and making accusations like this which could potentially ruin his career and an to an extent, his life.

So all of this and Hiroaki coming out as gay, I feel like it’s very safe to assume now that he has a crush on/is in love with Ojima. Even though I feel that people are making Hiroaki’s coming out scene more about hirojima then how personal it is to his story, it’s definitely something worth talking about. Hiroaki said that he did know for a few years by know that he liked guys, and due to his high standing as a celebrity and especially in Japan where being queer is still heavily stigmatised in society, he never got to properly be true to himself. And now in the killing game where he’s completely separated from the outside world and trapped with 15 other students who didn’t know him. Perhaps that could be a reason why he was acting more overly affectionate with Ojima if he had less of a worry of public perception, but I don’t know, that’s just speculation. And even from the initial interview at the beginning of the series him showing interest in him. And how over time we’ve seen Hiroaki and Ojima truly develop a strong mutual bond and with the very high likelihood that Hiroaki has fallen in love with him, all the ways this could go is so interesting. This is likely the first time Hiroaki has truly fallen in love with someone which isn’t just some PR stunt. And how with Ojima genuinely caring about Hiroaki and being supportive to him in his lowest of times and is actually able to see him for who he is. He’s one of the rare instances Hiroaki has had a figure in his life who isn’t toxic or has a part in upholding his image and covering up his true self. I can definitely see the possibility of Hiroaki actually confessing to Ojima happen some time, or even then becoming a romantic couple. And something like that would be a huge step in both of their arcs especially with Hiroaki coming to terms with his sexuality after a life of lies. And that’s where I would normally talk about Ojima’s story leading up to this as well, but that’s an analysis for another time.

So yeah that’s my thoughts on this reveal and why I love how big of a personal moment it is for Hiroaki. Exploring a specific story of coming to terms with homosexuality in an unforgiving celebrity industry where one has to try so hard to hide it is such an incredibly interesting narrative and by this one confirmation of him being gay, recontextualises so much of Hiroaki’s story and lots of things starting to make a lot more sense now. And I truly cannot wait to see what the future will hold for this narrative.

(Apparently this post isn’t showing up if I put too many tags so here’s my extra thoughts on it Oop)

[quantitative4rts]

I've been going insane based off of some implications from one of Monique's videos, which is this one.

your obligatory bad gore doodle you are welcome 🫡 but i needed to get this idea out so whatever

whole rant under here guh. Spoilers to one event (Abandoned Kerfur) in 0.8.1

Even if there's different lore related junk, this is mostly what I interpret it as so shrug.

I think that Dee definitely got snatched in some way and put into that one abandoned Kerfur robot that you can find buried. I THINK that the gore and guts inside of it are Dee and I have very limited evidence but I DONT CARE he's special to me.

(Text reads: Bloody robot. Even if there's a lore reason, I still think Dee got shoved into the robot and was trying to get help.)

No body found on the ENTIRE property, but his Kerfur was still trying to communicate with home base? What if Dee was shoved into that robot fucking FNAF style and was trying so hard to get help, but no one could understand him. Bleeding out, stuck inside of a machine with no chance at being saved... With how insane other topics in the game are, I think it's possible for Dee to have possessed that robot and that's why he attacks Kellin. I think that the robot attacking Kellin was just an unconscious response by the machine and Dee's anger at being abandoned.

Now I know that you can buy the orange Kerfur after defeating the abandoned one... But what if Kel decided to salvage this abandoned, bloody robot? I think Kel would be willing to go through hell to repair this thing, fix its broken paneling (from Kel beating the shit out of it with a crowbar,) and give it its own Kerfur-O body. Maybe he just wanted another robot, but he wanted to save it in some way. Eventually in some way it would be revealed that this robot has some aspect of Dr. Dee in it.. The guy who died with no care by the organizers of these experiments, the guy who was there at the base before Kel... And just imagine him seeing this early 20s enby guy just fucking thriving out in the mountains.

I've been thinking about these guys for a while and making my own characterization of Kel and shit so who cares if it's non-canon. Here's some fun facts about Dee from whatever this is. An AU maybe. Idk. Let's call this the Dr. Dee lives on AU. (DDLO.)

I'm fairly sure the abandoned Kerfur model might be thinner / slightly smaller than the one you can buy, so imagine a grown human skeleton being shoved into that thing.

With that in mind, Dee's Kerfur-O shell is missing its right arm, which shows off the internal gore and his right humerus bone. Super fun!

His eye also pops out of the fucking screen cause I wanted it to.

He used a cane for the first two weeks because he could not remember how to walk (It had been only two months but being half alive in a robot will do that to you.)

Once he got mobility back, he started to do tasks around the base for Kel. These included cleaning up trash that he left around before dying, collecting scrap for his shell or just for other projects Kel has in mind.

Kel gives him weekly journals to write in to document his experiences and to keep him half sane as crazy shit happens around them. Dee probably has insane panic attacks considering what happened to him while he was ALIVE THERE.

Kel ordered so many materials to make extra scrap (to make Dee another arm,) from the store that Ena had to send him a message asking what he was using it all for. Obviously he lied cause otherwise Kel and Dee would probably both be killed.

Dee is very appreciative of Kel and claims that "He does more for me than that company ever did."

After two weeks of being reanimated, Kel eventually just gave up on making another arm and just welded Dee's open wound shut with extra metal. He also started wrapping Dee's screen with bandages to cover the eye. Mainly so it wouldn't possibly get infected, but also because it was slightly freaking Kel out.

ok that's all I have developed for now, I will have more later maybe depends on how obsessed I get over them again. i have been playing votv nonstop i do not know how I have not gotten one of the forbiddens yet