#i have no clue how coherent this is because i am unwell!

[camellia-thea]

What would Tamerlane's life had been like if Annabelle Lee had gotten to keep sole custody, do you think?

:eyes::eyes::eyes: long post so under a readmore

okay so. i indeed have thoughts about this. so, we know that without the deal point blank, roderick would've been a poet and frederick would've been a dentist (rip). not quite the same scenario as annabel lee keeping custody of course, but a good stepping stone.

another interesting thing i feel about tamerlane is that she is the only one who i think's Issues:tm: would continue without the deal/roderick and madeline/fortunato's influence. she'd still have severe ocd and identity issues and these would still colour her life experiences.

i think the key difference between tamerlane with annabel lee alive/having kept custody is that she wouldn't have lost her ability to see other people as people. it wouldn't have become (something i personally see as) a coping mechanism for fame and riches at a young age, and also a way to protect herself from the mental illness i interpret she has (mentioned above, though that's a discussion for another time). i think that annabel's presence also would've turned that coping mechanism into being a bit of a people-pleaser; she already cares so much about her image and how people see her, i think that there was a coin toss made (one side of the coin being madeline, the other being annabel lee) and it dictated which side she favored.

i actually think freddie would still end up with roderick, because, from what i gather from the conversation in the last episode, roderick asks them to move in with him, and they accept because he's been, essentially love bombing them with money. tammy saying no to this would be really interesting. but, it leads her to being happier in the long run. i don't think she ever stops wondering about what would've happened if she said yes, but i think after a point, i think she stops caring, even as the thought crosses her mind.

i think she probably, at least from my interpretation of her, would've taken a similar route, minus the business degree i assume she has; that is to say, studying nutrition and kinesiology, with a focus on wellness. i think that she'd probably have stepped into being a (less... predatory) life/fitness coach, with a primary focus on matching her client's abilities and needs to try and give them a little control over their health (as always, it's all about control). if we're playing around with tamerlane keeping the heart condition i hc her as having, it only makes the drive to help people more important, as she'd be aware of just how difficult it is for disabled people to find care that actually accounts for their conditions and illnesses. it's also a profession that would help her see people as people, i think, because you have to get to know your clients to do your job well (and she's a perfectionist, she doesn't believe in less than 110%).

the other route i see, which would still play into tamerlane's Issues:tm:, would be a nurse. specifically this would be interesting in comparison to victorine being the daughter of a nurse and going into medicine as well. this would be really interesting to examine if annabel lee died in tamerlane's early-mid twenties. roderick and madeline try to bring her back into the family and she ends up as almost half an usher. freddie trying to convince her to come back -- or maybe he tries to push her away, because she's a threat? i'm not sure -- and victorine absolutely feeling threatened by tamerlane's approach. tamerlane would feel like an imposter, in this situation, with victorine being "her but better" in a way that links the really awful systemic disrespect of nurses against other medical careers. i think those comparisons would push her to cut all contact.

i like to think she would've met bill anyway, and they'd have had a far healthier relationship, just because the touches of honestly we get from tamerlane about how she cares about him is important to me. she'd still be incredibly insecure in said relationship, don't get me wrong, but i think she'd be more ready to work with bill over it. i don't think they'd have kids together, but they'd have a dog (this features in my tamerlane wip), and a nice but small house. tamerlane would value privacy, i think, and so i doubt they'd live in a city. suburbia maybe?

the deal still taking place, verna would make her die in her sleep, quietly, knowing she was loved. her funeral is planned by bill, who doesn't let roderick and madeline sweep in.

i think overall, she'd still be tamerlane; capable of being really cruel when she's feeling defensive, but i think that she'd have the capacity to step back and admit that she was at fault.

[cross-my-heartt]

thoughts about the finale from what I can remember right now:

[SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT]

They finally did it. They finally put their foot down about rescuing Crosshair and if there's anything that's gonna tide me over until season 3 it's THAT SINGLE CONVERSATION

We got a quality moment with Tech and Phee, so quality that I think I actually ship them now. (HAHA BUT FRICK ME BECAUSE THAT WAS ACTUALLY FORESHADOWING) I was worried when they didn't show her last episode because I thought they were just going to tease a fun comic relief kind of ship instead of, you know, having the characters be there for each other during important moments. As it should be You can't just put Phee in a side pocket and expect her to disappear when stuff gets serious.

That moment where they all look at Wrecker in sync is something I'll tuck under my pillow and look at when I feel like crying. This show has no right to be this funny before taking a sledgehammer to our hearts.

I was begging any god that would listen that the other infiltrators were clones, like I wanted it to be Cody so badly in that moment. I even think I heard DBB's voice when one of the commandos spoke and my pulse skyrocketed But no it was Gerrera. Which, okay plot reasons, and good plot reasons but still 🥲 Man but they really outdid themselves with the plot, it's actually crazy good. Such a roller coaster.

Kudos for actually letting one of the officers defend the clones. That's good writing. Realistically it makes sense and you don't get the feeling that they're all one dimensional psychos. As a side note I was impressed that one of the baddies (the one responsible for surveillance) had an accent other than posh British. And then I realized it was German 😂 like... c'mon guys

TECH. TECH MY MAN. YOU ABSOLUTE AMAZING INCREDIBLE BREATHTAKING LITTLE DUDE. I'm sorry guys but he stole it. Gave Crosshair a run for his money. I salute our little nerd for being the biggest bamf tcw has ever seen in that moment. The sass, the style, the one linery of it all. Of course he's not dead. You can't kill a character like that, you just physically (and metaphorically) can't.

I literally don't know how they'll recover from a trauma like that. They think he's dead. They watched him plunge to the ground. I am unwell (on their behalf).

So glad that AZI was incorporated back into the plot. The little dude deserves it and we love to see him.

'I liked goggles' 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 girl you better know how to perform miracles because that's the only thing that's redeeming you now

Wrecker was wiping tears when they talked about Tech. They were trying so hard to be strong for her. They were in agony on the inside and they still tried so hard for her. Wrecker was shaking his head when Hemlock offered Hunter the exchange, they are ready and willing to die on the spot for her I-

'who knew clones could be so... paternal' *cue shot of Hunter's face* *cue me being deceased on the floor*

AHFSEGFHJRDGHARDGRHGR that's it, everything that happens next is just AHRJHEASGFHJEGFHFRDGG. don't expect me to be more coherent than this

I didn't know they could animate Kaminoans to emote but dang they did a good job with Nala Se.

I'd given up hope of seeing Crosshair's face these episodes but we got him and Omega in one scene together and I guess that goes to the 'help me survive until season 3' pile.

I know we'd already clocked Emerie as a clone and fishy but there's nothing more satisfying than good foreshadowing paying off. This show doesn't give us cheap subversion but actually good plot twists where it's appropriate and they don't make the audience feel like fools by feeding us false clues. Mad respect for that. I don't think we realize how rare that it these days.

Finally, I'll need all of you to hold my hand after this, please-

[bluepenguinstories]

Happiness Overload Chapter Forty-Nine

Mornings. Waking up. How long since I last got to experience such a thing? It felt like an eternity. Moving from place to place, I must have denied myself a life several times over.

Yet there I was, picking myself up off the floor which I had fallen asleep on.

Close by, a tapping sound was made. My attention turned to the sound; a knock on the door.

“Verse, breakfast time!” Trent's voice came in.

What was I doing here? Had I unconsciously made my way back home? But why? My journey wasn't done yet.

The memories of the day before came back to me all at once, like a migraine. I think I actually did have a migraine. Fuck.

I clutched the side of my head.

“I'm not hungry!”

“Can I come in?”

“No, I,” My body had trouble keeping its balance as I got myself up. I had to hold onto the wall for just a bit as I made my way to the door. “I'll be right there.”

Great. Both a rush of blood to the head AND a migraine.

I deserve this, don't I?

I opened the door and faced Trent, who looked both surprised and concerned.

“Are you okay?”

“I'm fine,” I groaned. “I just woke up. I'm fine.”

My stomach growled. I looked down.

“Oh, shut up, you!”

Ow. I felt sharp pains when I bent down to scold my stomach.

“Are you sure you're not hungry?”

When was the last time I ate? I couldn't remember that, either. Days didn't really seem to go on as I never really stayed in one place too long.

“I just don't want to eat,” I admitted.

“You didn't eat dinner, either.”

“I'm fine, I just...hsss,” the pain in my head increased and my grip tightened. “I have a migraine.”

“Here, I'll get you something. But you need to come out and eat. If you're going to stay the night here, the least you can do is share a breakfast with the rest of us.”

“All right,” I relented. I pressed my head against the wall and looked down. From my peripheral, I watched him close the door. “Thank you...”

What's gotten into me? I'm actually accepting help. Am I in such a weak, miserable state that I'm depending on others?

I adjusted my glasses and made my way out. That was another thing. I knew better than to sleep with my glasses on. They could have broke, not to mention how uncomfortable that was! Hm...maybe that was the cause of my migraine.

“What's gotten into me?” I muttered.

Outside the thing that was less a room and more a walk-in closet, I inched my way out, making feeble movements, and shambled to the kitchen.

Everyone else was already there, sitting down and eating. There was a smell of something cooked. Eggs and bacon? No thanks. Trent walked over with a cup of water. I held out my hands and he emptied his fist and handed me the glass.

“Take this,” he instructed.

“Thank you...”

“Guuuurl, you do not look okay!” Velvet called to me.

I looked over in her direction.

“Whoa, I'm just sayin'!”

I didn't even say anything? Was it the way I looked? My face?

There was an empty seat at the end of the table. I took to it and stared down at the tablecloth. I wanted to just rest my head against the table and not face anyone, but I knew I wouldn't be allowed that. Rather, I did what I could.

“Um...I don't eat meat,” I let Trent know. My words still came out weak.

“Oh, good to know. So no bacon, got it. What about eggs?”

“Eggs are fine.”

“French toast?”

“Yes, but look in the fridge. There should be a thing of almond milk in there. Use that.”

Let's see if I can still use my power when I have a headache...

“Oh, I see it! Okay, I'll make you some french toast with almond milk in the mix!”

Whew. The taste of almond milk always did make me happier than the taste of cow's milk. It was such a shame this world was dying out, I felt like with a clear head, the possibilities as to what I could conjure up would have been limitless.

Some time passed, the headache as well, and without a second thought, a plate was set next to me. Everyone else already started digging in. Trent sat close to Blanc, who rather than eating any kind of normal breakfast, was eating gummy fruit snacks. Velvet and her girlfriend (I presume) sat next to each other, as well, at the other end of the table. The last variable, she was at the far end, positioned so that even if we held the most distance from each other, she could stare me down if she so chose. That was something I wished to avoid.

I dug into the plate. Ah, I hate to take slow bites, but the warmth, the fluffiness...

“I see you're as generous as always, Trent,” I smiled, looking down at my plate, and reminisced.

“I guess, but what do you mean 'as always?' I thought we just met yesterday.”

Oh. Shit. Right.

“Did you meet me in another timeline?” He asked. I gulped. I wasn't sure if he actually believed what I had said, even if it was all true, but that wasn't the question I wished he would ask.

“No, most of you here I only met yesterday. Sorry, I think I'm confused. Maybe I'm still feeling a little unwell.”

“Well, hope you get better, it seems like everyone's counting on you.”

Blanc held out their bag of fruit gummies. “Maybe if you had a fruit snack, you'd feel better?” They suggested.

“No thank you,” I waved my hand away. “Gummy candies are made with gelatin in them, which is a pig fat. Most yogurts also contain gelatin.”

“Oh, that's cool! Didn't know pigs could be so awesome!”

“You must be really smart!” Juniper remarked.

“No, I just have values that I like to stick to.”

“Ooh, and what might those values be?” Blanc egged me on. Heh, eggs.

Am I feeling OK? Just a little loopy?

“I don't think I could name them,” I shrugged. “They're just there.”

“Oh yeah, huh! Just like some of the ingredients on the back of food boxes!”

“Heh, you're a silly one, aren't you?” I smiled. It felt genuine.

“Whoa, you made a literal 180 overnight! Where's the awkward-but-mean version we met yesterday?” Velvet asked.

“Oh, this is how I prefer to be,” I gave a chuckle. “It had just been days since I've allowed myself to eat anything, is all.”

The room felt silent. They all stared at me.

“You were starving yourself?!” Velvet gasped. Great. There goes the sweet time I was having.

“What? It's not a big deal. I can still take care of myself.”

I wanted to slam my head into the table. Why couldn't I just enjoy a normal time without me opening the mouth and killing the mood? Next thing I knew, the worst thing happened: Juniper, looking right at me, looking concerned.

“But Verse,” she asked. “What would your wife think if she knew you did that?”

“Are you doing this just to torment me?” I grumbled, staring down at the table, and not at her.

“No? What do you mean? I just don't think it's a good idea to do that to yourself. People care about you, you know...”

The fork hit the plate. The plate was empty. I got up out of my seat and took my dishes to the sink.

“Thank you for the meal,” I muttered, my tone coming out more dry than I meant it to. As I walked out of the living room, then to the guest room, I heard someone get up after me. Whoever it was should have known to tread with caution. By the time whoever it was approached, I already had my shoes on. I turned around to see Blanc.

“Headed out?”

“I just need some fresh air,” I explained.

“You're not planning to bail, are you?”

I shook my head. “No, not yet. I'm giving this a chance. It's just hard.”

“It's not her fault. She doesn't know. If you want, I could clue her in.”

“Why must you toy with a maiden's heart?”

“You? A maiden? Ha!”

I glared.

“I didn't choose my friends, I'm just happy to have them around,” they grinned as they gave their justification.

“Tell them we can make arrangements for tomorrow when I get back,” I instructed them.

Maybe they didn't use some cosmic power to make me encounter Trent and Juniper, but it still felt like a trick. I pushed past them and made my way out the door.

Well, that was fine! She just woke up and had a headache, of course she'd be a little moody! As for me, I was peachy keen, although, was I ever not? Hmm...moving on! I went back to the table and let them know the deets.

“Hello friends, I am back,” I greeted, then sat back in my seat and grabbed some gummy worms. Guess they were gummy worms and a little bit of pig. Who knew?

“Is she gonna be okay?” Juniper asked me.

“Oh yeah, totes,” I replied, mouth full of gummy worm. “Just had to blow off steam. You know what they say, Pompeii wasn't unbuilt in a day!”

“I've never heard that expression before,” Velvet remarked.

Birch, no, Corey...Andy...Coriander! Coriander had her arms crossed and scowled. There was a little bit of steam coming out of her, too, I could tell. In fact, I could sense a rant about to happen in three...two...one...

“We were having a good breakfast, weren't we? I know I was! I was having a mighty fine breakfast. Argh. Then this happened, and it's just, like, y'know? It's just like that! I want some more bacon!”

Trent shrugged. “Help yourself.”

“I will!” She roared. I watched as she got up, grabbed a handful of bacon off the skillet, shove it all into her mouth, then sat back down.

“Alright, so as I was saying,” she continued her rant, barely coherent. “Screw her, am I right?”

Oh hey, that was short! I thought she'd have an actual rant to go off on!

“No, I think she's going through a rough time and we need to be there for her,” Juniper suggested.

“That's real nice of you, but you shouldn't try to help someone who doesn't want help,” Velvet replied.

“She can help herself by screwing off,” Coriander continued. Oh, there it was. “Why'd she have to have such an attitude for? As if that's any way to act as a guest!”

“Pot, meet kettle,” Velvet groaned.

“Yeah, okay, but then she tries to act all sweet as if anyone's really going to fall for it! Plus, even when she's acting all nice, she gives out orders. Like how she wanted you to use milk fresh squeezed from almond titties! She shouldn't just boss people around like that. By the way, Trent, you should make some more bacon, I just ate it all.”

“Uh-huh...”

“I don't think it's an act,” Juniper suggested. “I think she's trying because she that's how she'd like to be.”

“Velvet, you don't like waking up in the morning and that's a fact!” Nope. Coriander still wasn't done. “Yet what did we all do? We woke up in the morning, sat for breakfast, and even made sure she came along. So what does she do? Storm off.”

“She just needed a breather,” I reminded them. “She doesn't mean any harm, and she'll probably come back and apologize. I'm sure she'll even try to make it up to everyone, somehow!”

“Are you sure?” Juniper asked.

“Not really, but I know her pretty well! She told me to tell you guys that when she gets back, we can all make preparations for tomorrow!”

“Hmph, and what if she doesn't show back up?” Coriander pressed. “What then?”

I shrugged. “Guess since the cat's out of the bag, I can still get you guys there.”

“Maybe you should do that,” Juniper suggested. “So that she can get back to her own place. It doesn't seem like she's enjoying it here and if we lift that burden off for her, maybe she'd be happier.”

Coriander growled; Velvet gave her a few shoulder pats and she calmed down.

“You can try, but don't be surprised if she's not too keen on the idea. She can be even more stubborn than you are, Velvet.”

“Hey!” Velvet took offense to that. Oops.

I yawned. “Well, you guys do what you want. It's not even close to noon yet, so I'm probably just going to take a nap on the couch until something interesting happens.”

Yes, by the way, I actually did sleep. Just fine, in fact. Yeah, who would've thought?

Out by the lake on the docks stood a guardrail which I leaned against. The breeze against my back brushed past my sides and blew my hair forward. I remained still.

After I procured a match and struck it, I placed the lit stick between my lips; it didn't taste very good. Not a moment after, I placed the burnt match between my two fingers and with my other hand, I tried to snuff the flame out by squishing it between my fingers, but instead, felt the burn, and with a jolt, tossed the match away.

“This doesn't spark joy,” I grit my teeth, and just like that, the burn was no longer felt. Likewise, the burn marks on the tips of my fingers disappeared.

“Looks like what worked for you doesn't work for me,” again, reminiscing. Over what, it didn't even feel worth mentioning. No, not that I thought I could mimic her in order to understand her. It wasn't even that I was seeking to understand her, just that I was lost.

“What would you have done in such a situation?” Those words already got swept up and thrown into the water. As to be expected. There wasn't an answer, unless I felt like conjuring up a ghost.

Ah, now there's an idea...

I shook my head. Not even that would have done me any good. I made my way back. As lost as I was, I just had to go back and do my best.

“No, it wouldn't have mattered if I knew what you would do. I'm not you.”

The thought was almost worth a laugh: the idea of asking advice from someone who couldn't answer, someone who no longer existed, and who when alive I considered an enemy. Alas, I held the laugh in and headed back toward the house.

“Now that that's out of my system, time to go back and apologize to everyone about breakfast. There are more important issues at hand than my personal bullshit.”

Yes. That was the right mindset to have.

As I crept back inside, that was the mindset I clung to. After closing the door, slow and quiet as to not reveal my presence right away, I crouched down to slip off my shoes.

“Verse! I'm so glad you're okay!” The familiar voice greeted me from the distance. I looked over, to see Juniper.

“You are?”

“Yeah! I was so worried when you left!”

I looked away. “I'm sorry to worry you. There's just been a lot on my mind and I've been under a lot of stress, that's all.”

“I don't blame you, what with the state the world's in. Plus, you're not even from here, so it probably comes as a shock to you!”

Hm...yeah. Maybe in a sense. Out of all he atrocities I could have predicted, the destruction of Earth due to the same thing Blanc was more or less merged with was not one of them.

“That is true, but I agreed to help, so that's what I'm going to do.” Even if I do still find such a thing a hopeless endeavor.

“Maybe you don't need to, though!”

Glad to see someone agrees with me after what I told Blanc last night. Still, I'm giving everyone a chance, just like they suggested, so what else was I supposed to do?

“What?”

“You should go to her, you're clearly not happy here. Plus it's probably better than spending time with someone like me.”

“ARE YOU FOR REAL?!” I snapped.

“What? I'm just saying, it would probably be better for you if--”

“I can't believe you!”

I rose to my feet and I could feel myself shaking.

“How many times have I told you? I don't want to talk about it! But it's always the same with you, isn't it? 'Wife this, wife that'! Just...shut up!”

She took a step back. “Was...was it something I said?”

“It's everything you said! Eve since I came here, you've been a thorn in my side, and I'm sick of it! For the duration that I'm here, I don't want to hear the word 'wife' come out of your mouth! I don't even want to think of the words 'Juniper' and 'wife' in the same thought! You got that?”

“Ye...yes!” Her voice came out a whimper as she pursed her lips and I watched tears stream down her face. As I stood there, she went and covered her face as she walked away and went right into the guest room next to the stairs.

“This is my fault, isn't it?” I spoke, my voice low. No one else was in the living room, save for Blanc, who looked asleep. I had my doubts, but I wasn't about to test them. I now had bigger concerns.

I never meant for this to happen. I just let my emotions get the better of me and because of me, I made her cry.

As I walked toward the door to the room where I had slept in, I approached with hesitance. Yes, how familiar. In this scenario as well, I didn't want to face her, not like that. But it was already too late, and I felt the need to try what I could.

It's useless. She already hates you and you can't take back anything you said.

I let out a deep breath and gave a light tap on the door, then opened the door.

“Hey...” My voice croaked, barely a whisper.

There she was, sitting in one of the chairs in the room, and sobbing into her hands.

“I know I don't really have any right to be in here after what I said, but I'm really sorry.”

“But you're right,” she sniffed. “You told me it was a sensitive subject and I just kept bringing it up anyway,” she sniffed again. “I just have trouble with social cues sometimes.”

“No, no, you did nothing wrong. It was all me.”

She looked up, her face was red and there were still tears coming down.

I remember wishing that if I could get Juniper to break down, she'd see that I was no good and hate me. But now I made her break down and all it feels is horrible.

“Here,” I handed her a tissue.

“Thanks,” she croaked, then blew her nose.

“Believe me, the last thing I wanted to do was make you cry.”

She wiped her face. “You had every right to get mad, you said it was something that hurt you and I kept pressing it.”

I shook my head. “But I'm not hurt right now. Look, I'm fine!” I grabbed my cheeks and pulled them up so it looked like I was grinning. “See?”

“You shouldn't lie, you know.”

“Yes, you're right. But I'm only lying because I want to make you feel better.”

“You shouldn't pretend to be fine for my sake, either.”

I sighed. “You're right. But again, you did nothing wrong. I had no right to say those things to you and just because I've got my own problems doesn't mean I should have taken them out on you.”

“It's not that I meant to be hurtful. I wanted to help you.”

Right. I should have picked up on that.

“I know and I appreciate it. Don't think that I don't. I'm just not good at accepting help.”

“I do care about you, you know...”

Whatever her reason for saying that, I looked away. “Why? I'm a stranger.”

“You care about me and I'm a stranger.”

“No, you got it wrong, I...I'm just trying to be a better person.”

“I think you're already pretty good.”

“What do you mean?”

“I like how confident you seem, for starters. I could only wish to be as confident as you are.”

I chuckled at that. “You think I'm confident? It's all an act.”

“It is?”

“Yeah. Deep down I'm just a big scaredypuss.”

“You? But you act like you got it all together and you say whatever's on your mind.”

“That couldn't be further from the truth, either. Some things I shouldn't say out loud, and other things might have turned out better had I said what was really on my mind.”

“Well, if it's that, I could tell you were going through a hard time. You could say you're fine, but would a fine person starve herself?”

“No, I guess not. It wasn't even a conscious thing, to be honest. I've just been very neglectful with my life as of late.”

“It's easy to do, isn't it? Get wrapped up in other things, forget that you have a body.”

“Heh...I guess that's one way to put it.”

“You know, I think it's really sweet, actually, that you have a wi...sorry.”

“No, go ahead. Say it as many times as you want.”

“Are you sure?”

I nodded. Truth be told, it still felt a little uncomfortable.

“Okay, here goes: wife, wife, wife, wife.”

I laughed a little at that. It seemed funny in a cute way, how she said it.

“See? I'm not mad.”

Tears continued to stream down, even as she smiled. It seemed it was time to try a different tactic...

“You know what I do sometimes when I need to calm down?” I asked her.

She shook her head.

“I like to find an empty room, or somewhere where I think no one will hear me, I'll clench my fists, then yell whatever's bothering me, then unclench and let out a deep breath.”

“Does that work?” She asked.

Beats me. I've never tried it. I just made that up just now.

“Sometimes,” I replied. “Wanna try it?”

“Sure.”

She closed her eyes, clenched her fists, and a few seconds later, she yelled:

“I WANT SOMEONE TO TOP ME!”

...What was that?

After, she let out a deep breath and smiled.

“You're right! I feel much better.”

“The heck? I mean, uh, that's not quite what I meant, but okay!”

“Well, it's just like how Velvet has Coriander, and I'm like 'aww' but also 'damn I wish I had something like that', y'know?”

“Not...really?”

“Aren't those two just the cutest, by the way? I always like seeing cute couples.”

“Those two? Really? They're dysfunctional!” Okay, she was beginning to baffle me again.

“Yeah, but they make it look so cute!”

“I guess?” I thew out my hands in confusion.

At least it was a nice change of pace to be talking about something not centered on me.

“Is it okay if I say something else that's bothering me?” She asked with her warm smile I knew too well.

“Well, usually I would advise limiting it to one issue. If you start listing out everything that's bothering you, while it seems like a good idea, you could end up working yourself into a breakdown, which would be counterproductive when the goal is to calm yourself down.”

“So is that a no?”

“I will allow it. Although a risk is present in this method, said risk is not a guarantee. If it starts to look like you're getting worked up, I will be there to walk you through it and help you calm back down.

“Okay,” she drew in a breath. “Here goes.” Her cheeks were puffed up, which I had to hold back a laugh from the image.

“I DON'T LIKE BEING TREATED LIKE A LITTLE KID!”

After, she let out a deep breath, but this time, there were more, shorter, breaths that followed. If the previous statement she yelled caught me off guard, I was especially taken aback by that one.

“People are like, 'that Juniper, she's so adorable' when I don't know something, but that doesn't mean I'm not an adult and I want to be treated like a baby! I hear stuff like 'aw, she's so cute', but if it's just because people think I'm childish, then I don't like it. Yeah, it's nice being fawned over, but, but, but--”

“Deep breaths. Remember, deep breaths. It's hard to tackle more than one thought at a time.”

Thankfully, she listened to me. With a slow, deep inhale, then exhale in equal measure, she regained composure.

“...Do you really think people treat you that way?” I found myself asking.

“I-I don't know. It just feels that way sometimes. It's okay in small doses, but sometimes I just start to wonder if that's all they see in me.”

“That's not why I love with you,” I let slip.

“What was that?”

“What I mean is, if I should have been treating you like you aren't an adult, it never crossed my mind to. Yes, I've been really harsh, but I've still viewed you as an equal. What I like, and what I find sweet about you, is your kindness and willingness to help others. I can't say for sure what others think of you, but I think what people end up drawn toward is your sunny disposition. There's nothing wrong with being cute or liking cute things and you can still be an adult while doing so.”

“You think so?”

I nodded.

“You're kind, too, you know that?”

“No, I--” I stopped myself before I could finish that thought. “Thank you.”

“Your wife must be really lucky to have you.”

Really, it was the other way around.

“Yeah.”

“Do you think she and I would be friends?”

“I think so.” That wasn't really a thought I wanted to entertain, but oh well.

“I wish I could meet her.”

“Yeah, she'd probably like that.”

Except that could never happen without one of you two dying.

She tilted her head to the side and smiled. Rather than look away like I had done so before, I found myself staring back and smiling as well. We must have sat like this in silence until she broke it, herself.

“Oh! I just thought of something!” With that, the spell was broken, and I jolted.

“Oh?”

She got up and ran out of the room. I continued to sit in place.

What was I doing?

I looked around. Not that it didn't catch my attention yesterday, but it really was such a small space, and with two chairs just coincidentally occupying it just lessened the space so much more. With that in mind, how did I manage to get to sleep at all last night?

The real question is: what am I doing? Focusing on the layout of the room at a time like this?

That too must have been a spell, as I broke from that trance as well once the door opened back up, with Juniper coming into frame. She leaned forward, her hands behind her back, and smiled bright. It filled me with the fear that I may start to turn red with how close she was. Any closer and I would have sworn that her breath would have met my own.

“Okay, hold out your hand!” She instructed, although it sounded more like a cheer than an order, like something out of a pep rally.

I closed my eyes, as my mind was already going several places as to what that might entail. Just as she ordered, I held out my left hand. I felt her place something through and brush against my wrist. When I opened my eyes, she was standing up with one hand on her hip.

“Well, what do you think?”

The thing in question was a bead bracelet with letters between each bead. “B-E,” a heart shaped bead, then the next four letters, “K-I-N-D”.

“Be kind,” I read aloud. “Good reminder.”

“I know, right? But not just to others! It's a reminder to be kind to yourself!”

“Thank you. I'll treasure it.”

“Yeah, you better! That bracelet would've cost you a couple bucks on my Etsy!”

“What-see?”

“It's an online place where you can sell crafts you make!”

“I see,” I suppose that was as fitting to how I knew her than anything else. Really, the differences between the Juniper I knew and this one seemed minimal.

“C'mon, let's get up. I'm sure everyone else would love to see your smile!” She held out her hand.

“Sure, if I haven't pissed everyone off...”

“Hey! Look at the bracelet again!”

I gave a little chuckle at that. “Okay, you got me.” I took her hand, and together, we left the room.

As soon as we exited the room, we were surrounded by the others. Velvet and spice girl right outside the kitchen, Trent and Blanc both seated at one of the couches.

“Whoa! Talk about sudden development! You two are holding hands now?!” Velvet reeled back, in shock, though her expressions seemed more comical than genuine.

“Wha...AAA,” I didn't even realize that was the case, and as soon as Velvet said something, I let go.

“I swear, it's not what you think!” I scrambled to cover my image.

“We were worried about her,” Velvet explained. “When I heard her shout how she wanted to be topped, I was gonna run to her aid, but then decided to give you two privacy.”

Coriander glared and elbowed Velvet in the stomach. I heard a squeaky “ow” emit from the so-called 'badass'.

“Um...let's move on to serious business, shall we? We were gonna talk strategy, right?”

“Ohhhh, that's right! Fleshlight stuff!”

“Flashbulb,” I corrected.

“That was a test and you passed.”

I groaned. Who was I kidding? Change would never be absolute. Being surrounded by dorks was just not my ideal environment.

“Hey Ves,” Blanc turned to me. “Er, Verse. If I may make a suggestion, I think you should sit in that chair rather than the couch. Velvet, you're okay sitting where you were yesterday, at the other end of the couch. Coriander, that other chair next to Velvet? Perf.”

“Why?” I stood confused.

Blanc sat up and shrugged. “Eh? Feng Shui.”

“Sure, I'll take your suggestion. I think I prefer the chair, anyway.”

“As for me, it's a great metaphor: So close to my beloved that we could reach out to each other, but there's the end of the couch and the end of the chair signifying us as star-crossed,” Velvet concurred. If she was trying to wax poetic, it only came off as corny.

“You're smelly and gross and I would never be your Romeo,” Coriander spat back at Velvet.

Well, in any case, once we all took to our seats, I began the meeting.

“Now, let's get started: tomorrow, we will all--”

My statement got cut out. In its place was a cloud of smoke as the wall behind the couch tore open and the couch itself broke in two.

“MY HOUSE!” Trent called out.

I covered my face with my arm, but I couldn't tell how the others were. My heart started to race once more.

Have we been attacked? So soon?

“WHAT UP, ASSHOLES? IT'S ME, YA BOI!” Yelled out a voice through the darkness. I watched as the smoke cleared and the figure of someone in an odd suit of armor appeared.

Is this someone The Flashbulb sent to kill us all?

“Kelly Roger?” Velvet replied to the armored figure. “Is that you?”

“Hell yeah! Finally someone I recognize!” The figure took off their helmet and some curly haired redhead was now in view. I watched as who I assumed to be this 'Kelly Roger' person walked over to Velvet and held up a hand. Velvet high-fived the stranger.

“What are you doing here? I thought you died,” Velvet asked.

“Okay, you guys won't believe this, but here goes: I'm, like, from another dimension!”

Nobody replied to that.

Who does this make now? Three?

“What? Why do none of you look surprised? I'm, like, the tighest shit y'all ever shat!”

“Well, I thought it was a neat twist,” Velvet replied.

“Right on! At least one of you gets it!” Kelly Roger held up a hand again. Velvet shrugged, then high-fived again.

“So, what brought you here?”

“Okay, so lemme go ahead and tell my tragic backstory. Y'all ready?”

Nobody gave a response.

“I got mixed in with some bad folks and I lost access to my body pillows and figurines! It was tragic as FUCK!”

“Oof, that does sound rough,” Velvet replied.

“Oh yeah, not only that! But then I met a girl and it was like love at first sight!”

“Good for you, proud of you, KR.”

“Yeah, but then some shit happened and I left her behind.”

“I know how that is, buddy,” Velvet gave Kelly Roger a pat on the shoulder.

“WHAT?!” I cried out.

“Yeah, it was real sad 'n shit,” Kelly Roger added. “Like, some Lifetime movie BS.”

“Wow, I never thought I'd hear someone go through something similar as me.”

“HELLOOOO? I HAVE? I'M RIGHT HERE!” I waved my hands around, pointed to myself, the whole deal. Those two continued to ignore me, though.

“Yeah, well, anyway, she wasn't even into me, plus she was kind of a loser. So no big loss,” they added.

“Oh,” Velvet sounded just a tad surprised by that. “Well, good for you, then?”

“This is ridiculous!” I crossed my arms.

“That's the saddest story I've ever heard,” Juniper wiped her eyes as if she were weeping.

“YOU TOO?!”

“Anyway, I picked up this cool suit that allows me to warp through dimensions so now I'm just warping around between different versions of Earth until I find one where I save the day and I'm a hero!”

“Listen to me, young man,” I addressed the armored figure. “You can't just keep going around to different universes willy-nilly! There are consequences.”

Kelly Roger turned to me. “Y'know, just for that, I'm gonna be a girl today.”

I applied my palm to my face, as if everything I said was just a joke to this person.

“This is serious! Every time you go to a different universe, the version of you that belonged to that universe dies!”

“Oh, yeah. I already knew that. That's part of why I'm doing this.”

“What?!”

“Yeah, after a few universes of not coming out on top, I started to realize the one thing that kept standing in my way: me. So now I'm going around to every universe to make sure I die, that way I'm more free to defeat the likes of Marco and Etna.”

“Are you serious?! You're just going to genocide yourself?!”

“THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!” Kelly Roger roared.

“Ah, a Highlander reference,” Trent acknowledged.

“Shut up, old man,” Kelly Roger pointed. “I don't know what the fuck that is and I don't give a shit.”

“Fair enough,” Trent shrugged.

“Am I the only sane person here?!” I looked around and cried out.

“Nah, bruh. That would be me,” Kelly Roger replied. In fact, they were the ONLY one who replied.

“Oh, COME ON! This is ridiculous! Blanc, back me up here!”

“Mm...this is some good popcorn,” Blanc tossed handfuls of popcorn into their mouth from a bowl that wasn't there just a minute ago.

This is so unfair, Blanc! Leaving me to fend for myself amongst this nonsense!

“Hey, now that I think of it, you look kinda like Etna,” Kelly Roger turned back to me. “Took me a few universes, but I finally got her name and learned that it is indeed, not Kizuna AI's distant cousin.

“I am and I will kill you,” I growled.

“Cool. On that note, I should probably skidaddle.”

“Conrad wanted me to tell you something,” Blanc called to Kelly Roger before the armored idiot could leave.

“Eh? That loser? Well, spit it out.”

“Yeah, Conrad said he was very proud of you and there wasn't anyone quite as good as you at what you do!”

“Really? He said that?”

“Mhm!”

“Heh. I thought you were a lame-o because you were Conrad's androgynous lover.”

“Close enough!”

“But eh, you're not so bad.”

“Aww, you mean that?”

“I don't have to mean anything. God, you're such a loser,” Kelly Roger's face turned to that of disgust.

“Heh, fair enough!”

“Blanc?! Are you just going to take that?!” I cried out.

“Why not? It's true, isn't it?” Blanc shrugged.

“Anyway, I'm off to go kill myself!” Kelly Roger turned away and waved bye.

“Have fun!” Both Blanc and Velvet called out.

Have fun?! What kind of response is that?!

...with that, the being known as 'Kelly Roger' vanished. The damage, of course, was already done. The wall was destroyed, the couch was torn in two, and I was about to rip all my hair out in frustration.

“Okay, Verse, what were you gonna say about the plan for tomorrow?” Velvet asked.

“Really?!” I threw my hands up. “We're all just gonna brush aside what just happened?!”

Velvet shrugged. “I mean, sure. Didn't seem all that plot relevant.”

“Yeah, and besides, at this point, we're kinda used to random shit like that,” Coriander added.

“You were saying about tomorrow?”

“No,” I got up. “I can't do this right now. I'm at wit's end! This is all just too much for me! I need a chill pill!”

“Valid.”

I was about to head into the kitchen to grab a cup of water when I passed Blanc, who started saying in a sing-song voice, “sure is fun to be a loser.”

“Hey!” I faced Blanc. “Don't say that about yourself!”

They turned to me, smiling wide, because of course. “Why not?”

“You don't actually think that about yourself, do you?”

“Maaaaaybeeee.”

“You listen here, as your personal therapist, I will not have you calling yourself a loser. You got that?”

They started to laugh. “Sure, if it pleases you!”

“You are not a loser!” I barked. “You got that?”

“Why's it matter so much to you, anyway?”

“You gave me a chance when I probably didn't even deserve one, so I won't stand here and listen to you self-deprecate!”

“You're funny. You just did what you told me not to do in the same sentence!”

“Grr...I want you to say one positive thing about yourself! I won't leave until you do!”

“I don't see what's so bad about being a loser, I mean, I've had my share of losses, right?”

“You've accomplished plenty and you know it! Now one thing!”

“Okay! I've made friends!”

“That's good, but that's not something about you.”

“Sure it is! I mean, there's people who I've made friends with who don't even like making friends and yet they still ended up considering me their friend! That's gotta be worth something.”

“Heh. I see,” I closed my eyes and smiled. “I'll accept that.”

“Wait just a second. Personal therapist? Really? Some therapist you are! You didn't help me with jack shit when I talked with you yesterday!” Coriander butted in.

I sighed. “Yes, well, I've been out of practice and dealing with my own things. Even therapists have problems.”

“Mm, yeah! She's really good, actually! She helped me!” Juniper jumped to my defense.

Aw, thanks not-hun.

“All right, you're off the hook now,” Coriander warned.

When was I ever ON the hook?

“I have an idea! Since you're kinda burnt out and I'm a bit of a procrastinator anyway, how about we just figure out a plan as soon as we're about to leave tomorrow?” Velvet proposed.

“That's stupid,” I groaned.

“Come on, I thought I was onto something here!”

“We shouldn't just run into something blind. Maybe that worked for you in the past, but as a group, that's recipe for disaster.”

“I have an idea!” Juniper jumped in. “What if we all threw a party tonight that way we're not super nervous about tomorrow?”

“Actually...that doesn't sound too bad,” I replied.

“How is what I proposed any different?” Velvet seemed confused.

“Well, you didn't propose a party,” I pointed out.

“You're just taking her side because you like her,” Velvet added.

“What? No, no, no! I've hardly met her! Or you, or anyone else but Blanc for all that matter. Even with Blanc, I would hold no special favor toward them, so I really don't see how you could get that impression!”

“Yeah, and besides, Velvet, if you mean like in 'that' way, she's a married woman! I'm sure she's faithful!” Considering who said that, the irony cut deep.

“Okay, fine, y'all got me there,” Velvet conceded. “So how about this, then? We'll throw a party, and I'll go out and get the supplies.”

Coriander nudged. “Is this just an excuse to go to your ship?”

“I won't deny that the thought crossed my mind, but nah, a party ain't a bad idea. In fact, maybe I should make a list of things to get while I'm out.”

“Champagne!” I blurted out.

“You sure alcohol's a good idea considering what you told me last night?” Blanc asked. Their concern was not unwelcome, but I had to set the record straight.

“Please, Blanc, I'm an adult woman. Who would I be if I couldn't handle my liquor?”

“If that's how you measure being an adult, I don't wanna know what your definition of 'maturity' is,” Blanc muttered.

“What was that? Have a death wish? Hm?” My eye twitched.

“Okay, champagne, got it,” Velvet jotted down. I didn't know she had a notebook and pen all ready to go. “Anything else?”

“Smoked salmon, crackers, some kind of dip to go with it,” Trent spoke up. Seemed rare for him to input anything at all. “Maybe some cauliflower, carrots, a ranch dip.”

“Healthy, I see. You know, these are End Times and all, so can't guarantee I'll find any of those things, but I'll do my best.”

“Great! I've been wanting to eat healthier for a while now.”

“Fuck that! We only live once, and like Velvet said, world's ending! Be a little more creative!” Coriander rebutted.

“We do only live once, but we also all live an infinite amount of times!” Blanc jumped in. “Because there are an infinite number of us! As for me, I've already lived and died a few times!”

“Yeah, okay, Blanc, but what do you want me to get while I'm out?”

“Fruit snacks!”

“Somehow I knew you'd say that.”

“Kinda fucked up how jello shots aren't vaccines you get to prevent the jello disease,” Blanc added.

“Are you saying you want Jello shots, Blanc?”

“No, I don't like needles.”

“You know that's not what they are, right?”

“Yeah, that's what makes it so fucked up!”

Juniper walked over to Velvet and whispered something in her ear.

“You know, you don't have to whisper. We're all adults here,” Velvet replied.

“Yeaaah, but it's embarrassing!”

“Okay, hard or soft?”

“B-Both!”

“'Kay. Couple bottles of apple cider.”

Really? That was so embarrassing?

“Well, I think I got a good idea of what everyone wants, so looks like I should head off,” Velvet got up.

“Wait just a finger-fucking minute!” Coriander got up after Velvet. “How are you gonna carry all those things yourself? Obviously you're hopeless on your own, so I'm coming with you!”

“'Kay.”

'Finger-fucking'? Did she have to choose those words?

“Ooh! Ooh! Can I come with you two! I think it'll be easier to pick out stuff if I join in!” Juniper raised her hand and beamed.

“Sure, three's company.”

“If she's going, I should go with her! I ought to keep her safe!” Was what should have come from my mouth, but instead came from her brother's.

“Trent, with all due respect, she doesn't need you following her around all the time. She's just as independent as any of us,” I stepped in.

“You know, you're right,” he sighed. “She's always been pretty good on her own, I've just been so used to her living with me and not having an income of her own that I forgot about that.”

“Well, it's easy to see where you're coming from. I don't think it's a bad idea for you to go outside,” I told him, even though I glanced over at Blanc and winked. “In fact, maybe you should get out of the house for a few hours. Take a walk, do something fun, maybe stare off into the water and contemplate things!”

“So it'll just be you and Blanc at home?”

“Sure! We'll get the house all cleaned up while you guys are away! It'll be great!”

He mouthed the word 'wow', then said, “you sure have been a fine addition to this household.”

“What? Why would you say that?”

“Well, at first you were contentious, but now I feel like you've lived with us for a while.”

“Wha..a...a...I! I swear that couldn't be further than the truth!”

He laughed. “I know, it's just a figure of speech. I think Ol' Conifer Bark would have liked to have met you.”

“Ah, your mom sure was something,” I recalled.

“You knew her?”

“Err...no! Just the impression I got!”

“Ah, right. Well, it's settled. Take care of the house while we're all gone!”

I raised up a thumb. “You bet I will!”

As soon as everyone dispersed and Blanc and I were the only ones left in the house, it was time to get to work.

Guess all she needed was a nice chat with her not-wife for her to start making improvements. Worked for me, now if only I could figure out why she wanted to stay in the house while everyone else went out.

“Hey Blanc,” she turned to me. “I think it's time to undo all the damage done.” Although dramatic in her tone, she smiled the whole way through. I, on the other hand, was bored. It would have been better to just skip forward a few hours in time to the time of the party.

“Do you have to make it sound so serious? Just do what you're going to do,” I droned.

“You know how I roll. Nothing without its weight.”

“Yeah, yeah, just wave a magic wand or something and call it good.”

Her face lowered. “Couldn't you let me have my fun? Ah, very well,” she sighed. “I just think it would make me happier to help everyone else, even if it's something so small as making the house be like it was before that 'Kelly Roger' person broke through.”

“If that's what makes you happier, I'm all for it,” I gave my approval.

She waved her hands around, as if just to stim, but if I had to guess, it was to make up for the lack of a magic wand.

Just conjure a magic wand up and don a magician hat! Shouldn't be too hard!

Regardless, in a flash, the couch was back intact and all the destroyed bits of it were no longer scattered on the floor. The wall behind the house also reappeared. All in all, an adequate job.

“Bravo! Bravo! Now destroy it again so you can repair it again!” I clapped.

She gave a little laugh and did so and I was sure it was purely for my own amusement.

“Again! Again!”

“No, once is enough,” she laughed. “But that was a little fun, I gotta admit.”

“Yeah, so you see, you can hurt, but you can also heal!”

“Hey now, just because I'm in a good mood does not mean I need a lecture.”

I started juggling some balls. Badly. See, even with my ability to make things appear, it still didn't make up for talent. Still, I kept trying, just for the heck of it.

“Whatever mood you're in, I approve!”

“Thank you,” she smiled back. I watched her go into the kitchen and get that much needed glass of water she said she would get just a bit ago.

“You know, I think I'm starting to remember what it is that made me like her in the first place,” she said after sipping a nice, refreshing glass of...what the hell does water even taste like? Y'know, that would never not bug me. How do you describe water besides water?

“Well, that's good, but try not to get too comfortable,” I pointed out.

“Why not? Isn't this better than being bitter? Let me have this!”

“I'm just saying, it's good you two are getting along, but I think it would be good to remember she's not the one you're married to.”

“I'm not gonna cheat on Juniper with Juniper!”

I snorted. God damn! It was worth it just to hear her say that.

“Nah, wasn't suggesting that. Good point, though. I'm just worried about you, y'know? If you start getting the wrong idea, you may feel good now, but then you'll bring yourself back down. Plus, you're only here for a little while.”

“I know,” she groaned. “I knew that the moment I came here. Sheesh, for someone who's merged with a literal happiness angel, you sure are being a buzzkill.”

“You can still have fun! And besides, I have a feeling you'll make that mistake anyway and get yourself hurt, but that's probably what's gong to lead you to be happy! So it's all okay!”

“You know, I really don't remember why we're friends.”

“Because I'm fun!”

She went over and sat next to me.

“I never thought I'd get so comfortable with someone who looks just like the main villain!”

“Don't remind me,” she sounded exhausted rather than mad.

I decided to get up. No offense to her, quite the opposite! I ran up the stairs, went into to Velvet and Coriander's room, then ran back down the stairs.

“What is that?” She pointed to the thing in my hands.

“It's a Nintendo Switch! It's not mine and Coriander would hate it if I took it, but let's play some games while everyone's away!”

So there we were, sitting together as I taught her how to play Animal Crossing. I think it helped take things off her mind just for a bit. Tomorrow was tomorrow, but having fun was good for the now!

We all arrived home at the same time as if by some miracle. As I made my way back home, Coriander and Juniper also carrying bags of looted goods in tow, Trent looked to be walking back toward the house, too. We didn't comment on the coincidence, though it seemed a little interesting that it all worked out that way. Once we arrived, we were in shock.

“What happened to the living room?” Trent gasped. “It's like it never got destroyed!”

Verse stood up and that's what led me to remember just how tall she was. It was like a giant awakening from slumber.

“Blanc and I fixed it!”

“How?” Trent asked. It seemed he couldn't fathom how that was possible. Honestly, I didn't think I could blame him.

“Hard work and dedication!” She winked and gave a thumbs up.

“Magic,” Blanc looked up from Coriander's Switch and seemed to correct her. Coriander seemed not to notice that they were playing on her switch. Verse gave Blanc a glare in response to Blanc's correct.

“The magic of hard work and dedication!” She reiterated, thumb still up, her smiling.

“Well, thank you both! I couldn't be happier!” Trent exclaimed.

“Good, because I didn't actually do anything!” Blanc replied.

Not only that, but there were decorations all over the ceiling, the coffee table got reworked into the designated table with a punch bowl. Yeah, safe to say, I was impressed.

“Oh, right!” I got all caught up in the living room's transformation that I forgot to hand out the goodies. I walked over to tall lady, herself. “Verse, here's your champagne.”

She swiped the bottle from me and held it close.

“My precious,” she hissed.

Blanc nudged. “We poppin' the biggest corks, eh? Eh?���

“Trent, I hate to tell you this, but I didn't find any smoked salmon, so instead we got you some sushi.”

“But I eated it!” Coriander chimed in.

“...That's why we then went and got you some more sushi.”

“Gee, thanks! Those are also good!”

“Juniper, for you, two bottles of cider: one bottle of Screaming Trees hard cider, the other a nice soft case of Martinelli's.”

“Yay! You're the bestest!”

Coriander tossed Blanc a huge bag of fruit gummies. “Don't spend it all on one place, kiddo!”

“I thought of getting you gummy bears, but then I thought you would say 'all life is precious, I couldn't bear to kill a gummy bear', so I passed.”

“Thanks for being considerate, Velvet!” Blanc grinned.

“No problem, bud! As for Coriander and I, we're just gonna gorge ourselves on pizza and root beer. Though it wouldn't surprise me if she slipped some alcoholic root beer into the bag when I wasn't looking.”

“I live on the edge!” My lifelong roommate declared.

Yes, I think I did a pretty good job, if I did say so myself. There was one last thing to say:

“With that out of the way, let the party commence!” It hadn't even turned to dusk, but best to get the festivities going as soon as possible.

...At least that's what I thought. By the time it was actually late at night, I was certain I was the only one that wasn't shitfaced. Well, there was Blanc, too.

“Isn't it odd that there's a drink called a screwdriver but apparently it's not actually a screwdriver in liquid form?” Blanc went around the room and asked us each at random intervals.

In Blanc's case, it sounded more like a high than a drunkenness.

Verse was sitting at a chair, musing with a glass of her champagne.

“To drink or not to drink, that is the question, right Mr. Skull?” She laughed and a bit of her drink spilled onto her lap. “Aye, these seas be rough, matey!” She laughed again. “Oh, Mr. Skull! I can't be Hamlet, because you're not a skull, you're a glass of champagne!”

“You know, I don't know why Blanc thought her getting drunk was a bad idea,” I remarked. “This is the happiest I've seen her.”

“O Captain, my Captain!” She bellowed. “Pour me another glass!”

I went over to her. “Everything all good, cap?”

“VELV!” She was excited to see me. “I'm so glad you're here, I love you so much!”

“Uh...okay...”

“You could,” she hiccuped. “You could change your name to Red Cedar.”

“No thanks.”

“Aw, give it a try!”

Yeah, moving on.” I walked around. Laying on one of the couches was sleeping pixie. I mean, beauty.

“Hey babe,” I nudged her shoulder.

She snored.

So now I know what she's like when she's drunk. She just passes right out.

That just left Juniper, but she didn't seem to be paid much mind. She was just standing next to the table where the punch bowl was and chatting it up with her brother.

I was about to go sit down when I noticed Verse get up and go to the punch bowl. Something stirred in me, like I should watch what would happen next.

“I need a punch! Right in the gut!” She hiccuped and swayed on over to the punch bowl.

“Oh hey, it's Versey-Verse! Good to see you, BDSM Therapy Librarian! You know, I was just chatting with Trent about solipsism and then I got distracted thinking about how I don't actually know what the 'self' is! Isn't that funny, like we're just standing here, but are we really ourselves? You know, don't answer that, I'm drunk!”

Ah, I see. Juniper gets really chatty when she's drunk.

“I'm just here for some punch,” Verse replied.

“Yeah, funny that, that punch thing! I've always wondered what fruits go into a fruit punch, like I'm pretty sure one of them is apple, and maybe there's an orange, but what accounts for the red? Is it strawberry? Raspberry? Oh, it doesn't matter! In the end, they all come together to form that thing we call a fruit punch, and I think that's what life is all about. See, my brother here's kinda like you, he gets all worried a lot about things and holds a lot in, so maybe that's how I can tell that something was up with you.”

“I think there are too many things going on at once,” Verse spoke, still in her silly drunken stupor, but the closest thing to her usual phrases I've heard all evening.

“Yeah, so as I was telling Trent, you just gotta do what's right for you!”

“But you're what's right for me,” Verse spoke in a whimper.

“What? Was that flirting? I can't tell if that was, I'm never good at telling when someone's flirting with me, so if that's what it was, can you tell me? But anyway, don't you have a wife? Why would you be flirting with me?”

“You're my wife!” She cried out, then left the living room sobbing.

Rather than run into the guest room that she had been staying in, she ran up the stairs, where there were three different bedrooms she could have ran in.

Now I see, Blanc. Now I see.

I sighed. “Looks like I gotta be the designated talker tonight.”

Before going up to console her, I went over to Coriander, as I knew if she walked in on us, she was prone to getting the wrong idea. So I nudged Coriander again, and this time, she woke up, if only a little.

“Hey, a lot of drama stems from poor communication, so I'm trying to nip this one in the bud. So just to let you know, I'm going to go upstairs to get intimate with a very tall lady. Don't wanna alarm you.”

“Mm...okay,” she replied. “Can you give me a kiss goodnight?”

“No, you're drunk.”

“Okay,” she smiled, then went back to sleep.

The fuck? It was that easy.

One task done, one left to go.

It took me a few rooms before I got it right, but finally I found her. There were gadgest and gizmos and stuffed rabbits. If I had to guess, it was probably Juniper's room. Even when I entered, Verse didn't seem to notice me, she was instead sobbing on the back of a futon.

“I'd say she'd get mad if she found out you were in her room, but let's be real, she's probably gonna pass out in the middle of the living room tonight.”

She turned to me, and leaped back in shock.

“What am I doing here? Where am I?”

Did she sober up already? I wasn't sure if that was really the case.

“You're in sweet little Juniper's room,” I told her.

“Sweet...little...” She gasped and started hitting her head against the cushion of the futon. “This is terrible, so terrible!”

“It sure is something, alright.” I went to sit next to her on the futon. “So what's going on?”

“She continued to sob. “I...I miss her.”

“Who?”

“Juniper.”

“Well, you can still see her.”

“She probably hates me.”

“Nah, she probably just figures you were saying weird things because you were drunk. Which, she's drunk, too. You two can still talk.”

“No, I mean my wife! I miss Jun,” she hiccuped. It sounded like she said Junko.

“Junko? Your wife's name is Junko?”

She nodded, then looked confused. “Who's Junko?”

“I don't know, you tell me!”

“I'm just upset because when I look at her, she reminds me of my wife, and it hurts so much. I get so confused.”

“Who? Juniper?”

“Yes! Then there's all the questions and it's just a lot. I just wish I could look at her and see someone else!”

“I don't understand.”

“It's like she's there, but it's not her, and I want so bad to be with her, but it's not her!”

“Again, I'm confused.”

“It's like I've been close to being happy, but I just don't deserve to be.”

Huh, where have I heard that one before? Oh right, me.

“Why don't you think you deserve to be?”

“Because!” She continued to weep. “It seems all I do is hurt people, and the worst part is, sometimes I even enjoy it.”

“Oh girl, you bad. You real bad,” I teased.

“I know!” She cried out, then cried some more for good measure.

“Whoa, I was just kidding. I mean, it's probably not that bad.”

“It is! I know it is and I can't stop! Even tonight!”

She was being a lot more coherent than when she was drunk downstairs, but I knew she was still drunk. I could tell because she was one of those 'emotional' drunk types, which I used to be as well. Now it made total sense why Blanc warned her. I was starting to piece together how much of an idiot she could be at times.

“Hey,” I rubbed her back. “She's fine. Everyone's having a good time. Nobody's hurt.”

She faced forward, but started sobbing into her hands rather than the cushion of the futon. I couldn't tell which was the better option. Now her hands were gonna be all gross with tears and snot.

“Why are you being nice to me?” She poked her head out from her palms and asked.

“Because I'm bored? Because you're a friend of a friend? Because you being in a bad mood kills the vibe? What does it matter?” I picked up a stick and started poking her with it. “Hm?”

“Hey! Stop poking me! Where'd you get that stick, anyway?”

“Never mind that. That's not important now.”

“I miss her, I really do. It just makes the fact that I can't see her all that harder,” she went on.

“Why? Why can't you go back and see her?”

“Because I hurt her and I can't face her. Now I'm going up against an entity that's larger than any of us and I probably won't survive.”

“Don't talk like that. Nothing's set in stone. Let's say you do survive, and you are able to go back to her.”

“I don't think she would accept me,” she wiped her face. “I've failed her, just like I've failed myself and others so many other times.”

“You know, I bet I have an idea why Blanc wants to help you.”

“Why? Why would they be relevant right now?”

“Well, it's just that they went through similar things. Not the whole love life thing, but they were really down on themselves a lot and didn't have a bright outlook on things. I remember how they told Conrad once how they didn't belong anywhere and how they wanted to. With Blanc, they used to go about thinking they didn't fit into any group, and how no one would love and accept them, and how all they wanted was to be happy. So if they're happy now, and they have friends, even if we're not perfect people, I'd say I'm happy for them.”

“Really?” She began to look down. “I mean, I already knew, to an extent. When they got their new arm, I remember asking if they were okay not having their memories and living with my wife and I and they said they were happy like that.”

“Dang, so they lived with you two?”

“Two? Three? There was...hm...yes. We lived together. It was like an abstract family, of sorts.”

“Odd, but if they wanted a family who loved them, even if those people weren't much older than them, makes sense.”

“Then they told me about you and Conrad later, and how they missed you guys, but wasn't sure if you thought of them as a friend as well.”

“Yeah, I still don't think they're perfect. But I think it's good that they got what they wanted, in a way.”

“What does all that have to do with me, though?”

“Well, if you got what you wanted, wouldn't it make you happy, even if it felt like hell to get there?”

“I've tried that. It didn't work. I've done what I thought was right for me, too, but it all led to disaster. The only thing that's right for me is death.”

“Don't talk like that! Didn't you scold Blanc over self-deprecating? You may not have found what's right for you, or you might know what's right for you, but it wasn't right for you at the time.”

“I want to see her again! So bad! But I feel like I already ruined that!”

“Well, did you? Was it or was it not a break up?”

“It wasn't, but it may as well have been!”

“If it wasn't, doesn't that mean there's still a chance?”

She nodded. “But what if I fail again? What if she doesn't accept me?”

“Then you fail. You move on. It hurts, but that doesn't mean all you will do for the rest of your life is fail.”

“You're right,” she wiped her face again. “I have to do this, don't I?”

“You don't have to do anything. You can do whatever you feel like doing. But if that's what you feel like you should do, then yeah. Go for it.”

Then it happened: she hugged me.

“Th-Thank you!” She blubbered. “You're a good friend!”

“Jeez,” I struggled to break free. “You're so tall.”

“Shut up. Don't be ungrateful.”

It was at that point in which I couldn't tell whether or not she was drunk anymore. But, the very next second, she passed out. I slipped out of her grasp and got up.

“I should pour cups of orange juice for everyone. The last thing we need before a final battle is a hangover.” That was more a verbal reminder than anything else. As for the tall lady passed out on the futon, I said to her one last thing. “Goodnight, Verse. We have a big day tomorrow.”

I turned out the light and went to my own room. The living room would have to stay a mess. It wasn't like we would be seeing that house much longer. Maybe none of us were prepared for what was to come next, but we would all soon find out.