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valhallanrose · 4 years ago

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The Red Plague

The art above was created by Nix Hydra, and can be found in the Minor Arcana Art Book (or where I got it - off the fandom wiki page, because who’s going to stop me)

Much of Zelda’s story in the non-apprentice timeline delves into the plague before, during, and in the aftermath of Vesuvia, and I wanted to compile my lore and headcanons for it in one place before I delve into her story fully. I will incorporate as much canon as possible, but given that that isn’t a large amount of info, a lot of this is based off research and personal worldbuilding.

CWs for discussions of disease, death, body horror, I guess spoilers but I’m surprised if it is for anyone considering how the info is everywhere in game in all routes. This is also, again, personal headcanon and I don’t expect it to fall in line with everyone’s thoughts on the plague.

The Timeline

I’m going to go with a comprehensive timeline first, and this part is all based on canon information. I’ll try and provide as many sources as I can as well, but some of this is pulled from multiple books and I might forget exactly where something came from.

As we learn in the Lucio tale, Dawn of the Grub, Lucio strikes up a deal with the wyrm of pestilence (Vlastomil) - his parents’ hearts in exchange for a disease that will allow Lucio to kill them both. The Lucio brought the disease back to the tribe, which weakened his father enough for Lucio to kill him. His mother Morga, however, fights off the disease, referring to it as a ‘summer cold’, and Lucio flees the tribe and joins a traveling mercenary band which allows the plague to spread.

I don’t have a particular reason why Morga would have survived the plague. Her sprites in the game never show any sign of the plague that are generally acknowledged - no red sclera, no veins, no signs of weakness, so on and so forth. The best theory I can posit is that Morga either genuinely had a summer cold, or that the plague only took hold in Lutz rather than them both. Either way, unsatisfying, but we’re going to call Morga the exception and not the rule.

Because Lucio did not fulfill his end of the bargain with Vlastomil, the plague continued to spread, following Lucio as he traveled the continent. This is also the point where the beetles appear - more on them later.

The implication in the game is that the disease reached other countries and areas, but the next canon mention of the Red Plague’s spread occurs in Portia’s route, book X - Wheel of Fortune. A map is discussed where dates, places, and sightings of the plague are noted by Julian in his study of the plague - the Painted Fields, Blue Mountain Ridge, and Annyala Gate are all names that arise.

Nasmira recognizes the name of Annyala Gate and points out that Nazali was at that battle, in which a band of mercenaries was sighted - and their leader needed an arm amputated, which is confirmed to be Lucio. Nadia states that Lucio came to Vesuvia not long after that battle, and the next time the Plague was seen was in Vesuvia.

It is never seen again outside Vesuvia, and this brings us to the three years before the game, where Lucio’s ‘death’ heralds the end of the plague, and it is never seen actively again in the Arcana world.

The headcanons I have are to help establish a solid timeline. Dawn of the Grub tells us the deal is made on Lucio’s 18th birthday, and I personally believe that Lucio’s death occurred on his 40th birthday, giving us about 22 years of time for us to work with for the spread of the plague.

Some more headcanons mixed with canon:

Lucio is newly titled Count in the tale Travel at Night. Based on personal age headcanons, this tale probably occurs at minimum 17 to 18 years pre-canon, putting Asra at (at most) 10/11, Muriel at 14/15, and Lucio at a startling 22/23. It could occur later, as art style can influence perspective on age, but Muriel and Asra really don’t feel like they could be much older than that.

During his mercenary days (sometime between the ages of 18 and 22/23) Lucio was contracted by the former Count of Vesuvia, Count Spada. This battle occurs at Annyala, mentioned above, and is the battle where Lucio

At a certain point, Lucio was contracted by the Count of Vesuvia at the time, Count Spada, for a battle where he "made a name for himself." Story implications indicate that this was the battle during which he lost his left arm. It was amputated by Julian to prevent his death from blood loss. After he won the battle for Count Spada, he became friends with the Count and privy to secrets about Vesuvia and the Palace. Spada would eventually name Lucio his heir, and upon his death, Lucio earned rulership of Vesuvia.

The plague eventually appears and ravages Vesuvia’s population

Plague patients are sent to the Lazaret away from the city and cremated, then scattered on the beach.

Lucio contracts the plague and defies the average lifespan of those who contracted it by lasting a few months rather than 3-10 days.

Lucio dies on his birthday, not of the plague but as a result of the ritual he was attempting to gain a new body.

I tried to map most of that out here, and wow, what a sad little diagram. Nix Hydra, y’all are cowards for not going hard on this. I, however, am not, and I am about to go more apeshit than I already have.

The Spread

Cracking my knuckles on the history degree, baby, I’m borrowing some real life inspiration from across multiple time periods to tie all this together.

I personally think the whole “Oh, the plague arrives wherever Lucio goes and disappears when he leaves” thing is a copout, and we’re drop kicking that out a window.

I do believe, as canon states, that the plague follows Lucio. It spreads obviously to regions he visits, but I don’t think it just disappears when he leaves. I really, really want to believe someone would have been smart enough to see the connection if the plague suddenly appeared and was later yoinked out of existence as soon as Lucio left town every single time it cropped up somewhere way sooner than it was noticed in canon.

I don’t think the plague was as isolated as the game implies, and when it was in Vesuvia, it was probably also elsewhere. The epicenter was Lucio, of course, so Vesuvia faced the worst of it, but I think there would have been pockets with much smaller numbers in other parts of the world.

Earlier I mentioned a few locations cited in Portia’s route as to where the plague had been before Vesuvia - the Painted Fields, Blue Mountain Ridge, and Annyala Gate. I think once these areas were hit with the plague, it would have continued to spread even after Lucio left. Across multiple routes, it’s made clear that the only ‘cure’ to the plague is Lucio’s death, which is why Julian had intended to kill Lucio after making his deal with the Hanged Man. The lack of Lucio’s presence would have kept the plague from continuing to escalate, but in these regions, it probably would have spread when the region’s people attempted to relocate, or ceased when the population died out.

Annyala Gate, or the Great Gate, is a location I can dive a little deeper into. It’s the last location the plague was sighted before Vesuvia, and because it ties into my OC Zelda’s storyline, I have many a thought.

Lucio is in Annyala sometime between year 1 and year 4/5, though I believe it’s on the later end of that spectrum, so let’s say year 4 to clearly predate his title as heir to Vesuvia. For reference, here is a map of the Great Gate as provided by the art book:

Jeebus. Terrible photo quality. Ah, well, on we go.

The Great Gate is situated between the Sea of Persephia (left) and the Salty Sea (right), and as the map currently stands, is the only point on land that gives access to the southern part of the world map. In this area in particular, I feel like a number of factors would have kept the plague alive long after Lucio left.

Narrowest point on the world map for transport of goods between ports and seas, which would be a more efficient route than traveling around the continent to reach the same point

As previously stated, this is the only known access point to the south, and travelers heading through this area could possibly be carriers of the plague or catch the plague from the area

The only way for the plague to stop would be with the death of Lucio, so once it was inflicted upon this area, it continued to spread and infect the population in adjoining areas

The game repeatedly has emphasized the proximity of the Red Beetles (known harbingers of the plague) to water, such as the Nopali village in Asra’s route and the red stains attributed to them in Julian’s route, and we receive further confirmation in Portia’s route that the water supplies are contaminated during the period of the disease

Fun bit of trivia from Nadia’s route - in the Strength book, Nadia mentions that she remembers the beetles, and that once they had been used as part of a pigment used to dye fabric crimson, which was all the rage in Vesuvia. Should this trend have continued, people wearing fabrics dyed with this beetle pigment most likely would become infected, and thus, the cycle continued.

I will also point out here that pigments have been used in makeup across history, and I’m sure applying some beetle-laden makeup would have really fucked some people up. Eyeshadows, blushes, lipsticks...contact with any of these areas, particularly the eyes and mouth, indicate a possibility of infection.

This does, however, leave a fifteen year (ish) period where the plague would have been active in this region until Lucio’s death. Historically, diseases can last such broad swathes of time. For the sake of displaying precedent, I will point out some examples here:

The Black Death, lasting 1346-1353

The third cholera pandemic, lasting 1846-1860

The third plague pandemic, a major bubonic plague like the Black Death, lasting 1855-1960

The HIV/AIDS pandemic, which has been ongoing since 1981 in the US

However, some of the most devastating plagues have lasted only a few years, which I will touch on later when I discuss Vesuvia’s case of the plague. All of the diseases listed above are additionally categorized with death tolls over a million people.

(On a side note, if you would like to contribute to programs searching for a cure for HIV/AIDS, I will suggest donating to organizations like amfAR, the Black AIDS Institute, or the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation, all of which are linked accordingly and deserve your support if you are capable of making a contribution)

Remaining question: if the last place the plague was seen was in Annyala, more than fifteen years before it was seen in Vesuvia, what the fuck happened during that time beforehand?

Vesuvia - Before the Plague

Here’s the thing. The timeline given by the devs is a fucking mess. So, what I’m going to propose here is almost entirely theory, and I ask that you keep that in mind.

Lucio ascends to the title of Count by the time he’s about 22 or 23. Spada dies, presumably, and there’s no noticeable mention of his death via plague or the establishment of the court.

For some fascinating lore on how the government in Vesuvia works, I’m going to point you to this post by @sunrisenfool, who has one of the biggest brains and is gracious enough to allow me to reference their work a little for this one.

I don’t think the court as we know it existed when Lucio became Count. I agree with sunrisenfool here that Valdemar has been the Palace’s cockroach for a while - which was actually also confirmed in the Star book of Portia’s route, in which we see Count Prospero (founder of Vesuvia) summon Valdemar and ask for their aid in creating a city that will never die. The remaining courtiers would be gradually established as time continued on, all demons who struck bargains with the Devil in one form or another placed into positions of power alongside Lucio. We also cannot forget Valerius, who made his own deal with the Devil, and played his own role in this scenario.

We know that Lucio was also a pawn, later on, in the Devil’s agenda to bridge the gap between the main world and the Arcane realms. The ritual discussed in Portia’s Star book is described as a vessel to do just that -

“...every 777 years, the physical and magical world will collide...the laws of magic will no longer be immutable, and the world will bend to our will...So long as the Countship and canals remain whole, so shall the power to reshape the world. You need only await the conjunction. Perform the ritual and lead the city to glory heretofore unknown. I, Count Prospero, first of my line, declare the founding of Vesuvia. The city eternal. My legacy.” - Count Prospero

It’s confirmed after this scene that the ritual, using the canals as a conduit, opened a ‘door’ so to speak to the Arcane realms. It’s also said there is a three year window to perform this ritual, and that at the time of game canon, we are at the end of that three year window.

So. Borderline conspiracy time.

Circling back to the lovely sunrisenfool’s work, I’m going to pull a particular excerpt here:

...the Consul of Vesuvia is the second most important/powerful political figure in Vesuvia, directly after the Count/ess. Aside of the political and civic duties I have already explained, the Consul acts as a “protector” of Vesuvia, albeit not in a paternalistic politically-conservative way (which is how paternalistic policies would be understood in our world). Instead, the Consul is meant to rule the City if the Count is absent or incapacitated, therefore being the subsidiary depositary of the secret of the foundation of Vesuvia, and the importance of it’s Canals.

Lucio makes it pretty clear he doesn’t know much of anything about the ritual during Portia’s Star book, but he was told about it by Spada before his death as it was a secret kept close to the court. That gave him something of leverage, even if he wasn’t aware of it,

My thought as to why the plague did not spread in Vesuvia sooner is that Lucio had knowledge of this ritual, however minimal, and the Devil needed him alive to eventually use the ritual for himself. So, as Vlastomil (the wyrm of pestilence who granted this curse) was established in Vesuvia as Praetor, the plague was kept at bay for the time being while the city came under the full control of the Devil’s demons.

I cannot imagine the only person who knows about the ritual is the Count, because that feels like a woefully flawed plan, so I do believe the Consul would have also been privy to such a secret in case the Count was in a position they could not share it due to absence or incapacitation. Basically, a rehash of sunrisenfool’s point, but I digress.

As the window drew nearer for the completion of the ritual and it became clearer that Lucio knew next to nothing about the ritual and how it worked, the Devil decided to take a different approach. The plague was unleashed once again by Vlastomil, with the goal that Lucio become infected and eventually die, and that Valerius take over the Countship. Lucio no longer was useful to the Devil, and should he be removed from power, someone like Valerius - who knew the purpose of the ritual, who was under the Devil’s bargain by this point - would be an ideal candidate to finish the task at hand. Leverage, it works wonders.

I don’t think the ritual performed to gain a new body could have been mere chance. I think Lucio knew more than he let on about the canals and the magic in Vesuvia from Spada. Yes, I know the first three were written before Portia, but come on, the timing is insane. He’s no magician, and performing something that complex and magically charged right at the beginning of the three year window when the ritual is supposed to be performed feels far from coincidental. Fight me.

But, on to what happens in Vesuvia once the plague is free to spread again.

Vesuvia - During the Plague

The first sighting of the plague is in year 20, and I personally believe the plague lasted about two years or 24 months. The period is divided into three ‘waves’ - the first six months, the year leading up to Lucio’s death, and the six months following Lucio’s death.

The First Wave

The first wave begins when the first known case of the Red Plague is confirmed, and in this period, the spread is rather slow.

Here is the introduction of the Lazaret, which I do believe is a building that existed before the plague - this is personal thoughts, but the odds of this being the first major disease Vesuvia experienced feel pretty slim, and I do think this was a previously established quarantine that was renovated/expanded for the Red Plague outbreak. In an effort to get ahead of the disease, the space was designated a quarantine, largely staffed by volunteers when the palace seemed to not acknowledge the growing situation. It would slowly begin to increase until the plague boomed at the six month mark, heralding the beginning of the second wave.

The Second Wave

This is the ‘bad period’ of the plague. I say that loosely, because it’s all bad, but I digress.

I headcanon that the apprentice dies in the beginning of the second wave, when spread of the red plague rapidly begins to increase and the call goes out for researchers to search for a cure. We know how that story goes, so moving on to the details of this wave.

There were two groups at this point in the plague - those assigned to research, working out of Valdemar’s dungeon/lab/carnival of horrors studying the plague, and those assigned to the Lazaret, caring for the sick and dying and maintaining the facility.

I’m going to focus more on the Lazaret for this, as the research aspect is pretty well covered throughout Julian’s route and conversations with him in other routes, and this post is already getting long.

The Lazaret was home to the dying, where they would be cared for in their final days and eventually cremated. My thought is that the remains of the patients were carefully catalogued in the beginning, returned to families willing to claim them, and those left unclaimed were scattered on the beach at the Lazaret. Later on, as more and more people died, less remains were claimed, leading to the black beaches that still mark the shores of the Lazaret in canon. Often the staff here were a mix of healers, doctors, apothecaries, anyone willing to try anything to ease the pain of such a disease.

The staff at the Lazaret began wearing layered masks - the plague mask with its herb-stuffed beak, another facial covering beneath for an added layer of protection, and a head covering that sealed the gaps between the mask and the face. They were also required to wear gloves, tight-fitted sleeves tucked inside, and their pants tucked into their boots to reduce the risk of infection through contact. Their days would start in locker rooms on one end of the facility, removed from the patients, and suit up for the day while leaving belongings in the lockers. The end of the shift consisted of showers and disposal of garments to be sterilized, they’d return home in the clothes they came in, and by the time they returned a new uniform would be waiting for them.

Lucio caught the plague during this period, most likely halfway through. He lasted several months, but the exact length is unknown, aside from he ‘lasted longer than most victims of the plague’ who died between 3-10 days.

I don’t think the averages are entirely accurate. There were most likely some who were asymptomatic until the plague was in very late stages, or those who presented symptoms very early on and survived for long stretches of time. All would die bearing the red sclera, veins, and other symptoms depicted above. Basically, this disease is claimed to be unpredictable, and I think that would also stretch to the duration at which each patient had it. Those who were physically frail likely would have died sooner than those who had been in oprtimal health before the plague, making the times vary rather drastically. I’d suggest perhaps a month at the longest, a few days at the shortest.

Policy wise - during this period, the ports would have closed, and Vesuvia would have shut down. Nobody in, nobody out, not without rigorous inspection and quarantine before exiting to the city to avoid further spread. Often the only people allowed into the city were doctors from other regions affected by the plague called to help research, but during this year, I would estimate Vesuvia lost easily 30% of its population to the Red Plague.

The Third Wave

This wave is the period that occurs after Lucio’s death at the Masquerade, three years pregame. I’ll touch a tiny bit more more on this in the next section, but this is where we see the gradual end of the spread of the plague, and the last cases shown in Vesuvia. It’s the end of the plague period, and I give this about six months for the official ‘all clear’ to have been given by those tracking case counts.

The Lazaret is eventually decommissioned and now sits abandoned, a shadow on the horizon to remind those who survived what had been lost. The city mourned, the gates slowly opened, and gradually, we reach the point of comparative normalcy we see in the game set three years later.

Vesuvia - The Aftermath

Lucio’s death would, ultimately, mean the end of the plague. Rather than immediately disappearing and all those suffering from it be cured, however, I would be inclined to say that the spread came to a halt.

The last wave of the plague, in the six months after Lucio’s death, would have been a decrease in new cases until there were no new ones being reported, and the last of the patients who had been infected finally passed.

The final duties of the doctors at the Lazaret, after all remains are cremated, would have been the incineration of all materials that could not be sterilized. Linens, spare uniforms, unclaimed personal affects, so on and so forth until the time came to return home. I do not remember the exact location, but I am fairly confident of a mention of the MC remembering barrels burning doctor’s uniforms and masks in the days after the end of the plague. It was, for a lack of better words, a purge - an attempt to erase the last physical memories of what the city had endured.

Events like this are traumatic for all involved. They are painful wounds, and for the rate of death I imagine occurred in Vesuvia, the odds that someone lost no one are slim. There was likely a long period of mourning, and as noted in the present of the game, rarely is the plague spoken of outside of the context of the investigation in the primary routes.

Many of those medical staff members who survived were those assigned to research at the Palace. The proximity of the staff to the ill at the Lazaret quarantine likely would have made the rate of infection far higher for the caretakers, meaning that often the staff would end up caring for colleagues in their final days.

Even three years removed, the time of the plague is a raw wound for those in Vesuvia - but I do think the period is fascinating and I love exploring the different facets of it in my own world building. And, well, shameless self promo, but I am eager to write it myself when I get into Zelda’s backstory.

If you made it this far, thank you. Go drink some water or something, idk, wellbeing checkpoint bc what a long ass post

#red plague #worldbuilding #long post #the arcana #the arcana game

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singingvio · 4 years ago

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LEGEND OF MANGA LISTS: Top 5 SADDEST Moments in the Zelda Manga Series!

((NOTE: Twilight Princess mangas and the Skyward Sword excerpt in the Hyrule Historia are excluded from the mangas considered in this list.))

1. Volvagia’s Demise (Ocarina of Time part 1)

In chapter 3 of Ocarina of Time, part 1, the story depicted is titled “An Old and Beloved Friend.” This chapter mostly depicts Link and Volvagia’s fight, along with their backstory depicted solely in the manga and not in the game, as it isn’t canon. The chapter starts with Link’s bow out, a single arrow ready to be embedded in Volvagia’s skull, only for Link to falter. The dragon burns Link and nearly kills him, only for Link to be healed by Sheik.

Link insists to the Goron Link that he can’t fight Volvagia. Sheik makes a fairly robotic comment while playing his harp that the only way to subdue Volvagia is to kill him, and Link loses it, yelling at Sheik, “That’s easy for YOU to say! There must be some way to make him remember me!” Sheik shows him exactly what disasters are happening due to Volvagia’s tantrum, Kakariko and Goron villages close to destruction, and Link sadly recounts the story of how he and Volvagia met before his inevitable battle.

Link saw him as a baby, locked in a cage with a price of seventy rupees in Castle Town. Link bought the dragon and set him free, only for Volvagia to bite his hand and burn his hair with his flames. Link tries to ignore the dragon later, when it follows him, but then Volvagia ends up burning a Stalfos that had been sneaking up to kill Link. Link then befriended the dragon, and Volvagia said his name aloud, and the memory fades as Link is brought out of his story by someone warning him that the volcano is about to erupt.

Link, in a futile, heartbreaking effort to make Volvagia remember him, yells out, “It’s me! Link! Remember me!” Seeing as this does nothing, Link drives his sword into Volvagia’s flesh, beheading him. At his final moments, Volvagia remembers Link and starts to cry, calling his name out one last time to an expressionless Link as he dies.

2. Ghandi’s Defeat and Link’s Following Despair (A Link to the Past)

In Act 3 of A Link to the Past, Sacrifice, Link and Ghandi (a character created to be Link’s friend and travelling companion exclusively in the manga) travel through the Dark World, saving its inhabitants from fates worse than death to pay for their sins. When Link talks to a gossiping monster of a swamp, it is revealed that Zelda is at Turtle Rock, and Link heads there immediately. Ghandi, however, stays behind.

Ghandi claims that a bandit can’t risk her life just to save someone else, and Link argues that he only got this far because of her helping him. They inevitably split up, and Ghandi worries silently about Link and confesses to herself that she’s had a crush on him and can’t bear to see him reunited with Princess Zelda, as he clearly loves her instead.

Meanwhile, Link makes his way to Agahnim at Turtle Rock, to free Princess Zelda. Agahnim calls on a giant, firebreathing hydra to stop Link from saving Zelda, and Link, thinking nothing of it, defeats the monster with ease. Link comments on the monster’s strength, saying, “It’s kinda weak, for such a big…” and then he realizes. The monster vanishes into smoke, revealing the broken body of Ghandi, who isn’t dead, but very close. Link is heartbroken, and immediately hatred fills his heart as he turns on Agahnim for making him fight Ghandi.

Agahnim points out what Link is becoming, a hateful wolf, and Link watches his own body transform in horror as he cries out in agony. Zelda manages to break free of her crystal cage, and heals Link from his beastly form. Together, they manage to heal Ghandi before she dies as well, and the two are properly reunited.

3. Pirate Captain and His Lady (Oracle of Ages)

In chapter 7 of Oracle of Ages, The Pirate Captain, Ralph and Link are stranded in an unknown body of water on a raft, trying to get back to the mainland to rescue Nayru. They’re rescued by the Pirate Captain, a man worn away to only soul and bone, as is his crew. Ralph and Link ask him how long he’s been sailing, and he replies that he doesn’t know and is very tired.

The Captain and Link discuss Link’s sword and its fine craftmanship, and then the Captain notices Ralph holding the Harp of Ages, and asks for a song. Ralph obliges, playing a traditional waltz, and the captain is happily lost in the memory of when he was in Labrynna, dancing with a fine lady under the stars. He says, “I remember this song from when I danced with her! We were in love, and the world was ours. Until it ended, and I set to sea to forget. But I could never forget… not her.”

He then makes a bold declaration, one soon revealed to be one of many when Link reads his logbook, that he will make it back to Labrynna to reunite with the lady he still loves to this day. As the ship is caught up in a horrific storm, Link gets his hold on the Captain’s logbook, reading in horror the logs there. “Day 23: set sail for Labrynna. Encountered a storm. Day 145: Storm. Day 317: Storm… They’ve been stuck in this storm forever!”

Link and Ralph attempt to escape the ship in their fear that they won’t be able to, and the Captain attempts to stop them. Link manages to tell the Captain that if he lets them go, he can fix things for him and his Lady, and the Captain, on the brink of tragedy as he lets Link and Ralph go, his final words are a request to Link. “If y’see this lady on your journeys, lad, tell her… the Knight who set sail… will love her for all eternity.” He shows Link a picture of Queen Ambi, and with that, he disappears without a trace, and is never shown again.

4. Shadow Link’s Final Stand (Four Swords part 2)

In chapter 12 of Four Swords part 2, The Four Sword Forever, we see the Four Links’ final stand against Vaati in order to save Zelda. Previously in the manga, Shadow was resurrected using the power of the Dark Mirror after a crushing betrayal from Vio, the smart, collected side of Link he’d thought to be his friend before his temporary defeat. The Dark Mirror is the source of all dark magic, including his life force. Shadow was resurrected right in front of Zelda, who was staring sadly at him, and he yells at her angrily to not take pity on him, as he hates it.

Zelda is then enshrouded in a dark cloud, and Shadow panics, asking Vaati what’s happening to her. When he realizes Vaati is going to kill Zelda, he completely breaks down, taking a quick detour to help the Links by disguising himself as Vio before going back up and grabbing a chair Zelda had been sitting in prior to her slow poisoning in the cloud, throwing it at the Dark Mirror with a scream and breaking the center of it.

Finally, in the final chapter of Four Swords part 2, the Links are almost where Shadow, Zelda and Vaati are. Shadow is incredibly weak, putting almost all his weight on the side of the Mirror. Vaati panics, yelling at Shadow that if he destroys the mirror, Shadow will die too. Shadow grins at Vaati, before saying, “That’s all right. I came out of the Dark Mirror. And with it’s power I woke you. How fitting that I use it to destroy us BOTH!” And with that, he shoves the mirror to the ground, successfully killing Vaati.

The other Links find his body lying next to the mirror, thanking him, and Shadow starts to close his eyes when Vio yells at him to “hang in there!” Shadow then calmly recounts what his life is like as Link’s shadow. “A shadow… usually only ever follows its body. It never gets to lead the way. Today I faced the enemy… on my own. It felt pretty good, but that still doesn’t make me… part of the body.”

Green (the leader and most ‘Link-like’ of the four) tells him the opposite, telling him that he’s their friend, and Shadow, with newfound energy, gets up and reaches towards the other Links, only for him to fade into the light and disappear, dying permanently and for the last time as the other Links stare at where he once was.

5. Skull Kid’s Backstory (Majora’s Mask)

In chapter 9, Fierce Deity Link, the Moon is stopped by the four Giants in Termina. Link sees Tael and Tatl reunited, and notes how sweet it is before thanking the Giants and joking with Tatl about how long it took for them to arrive. Skull Kid, meanwhile, shakes in the background, knocked to the ground and not getting up. In a moment of clarity, the mask not having control on him in his moment of emotion, Skull Kid despairingly recounts his tale.

Skull Kid sadly says that he didn’t mean for this to happen, only wondering why the Giants left him. A flashback is then shown from Skull Kid’s point of view, the Giants getting ready to leave as Skull Kid desperately tries to hold them back. “Why?! No! No, you mustn’t! Hey… Wait! I said wait! Don’t go! Hold on! I said wait! Don’t go! Can’t you hear me?!”

He cries out, many times, sometimes even trying to forcibly hold the Giants back and failing drastically. He ends up falling off a cliff, still trying to catch up with the Giants as he’s battered and bruised, still crying, “Don’t go!” He’s then seen travelling across the desert, tripping and folling multiple times, when he accidentally steps in a bird nest. The birds immediately attack him, yelling at him to watch where he’s going and that it’s fun to hurt him by pecking him.

Skull Kid shakily reaches a hand up to keep going, but gives up as rain pours down on him, tears pouring down his face as he stares at the ground in defeat. The flashback fades out, as Skull Kid says a truly heartbreaking line before being taken over by Majora’s Mask once more, initiating the final battle. “I guess… we never really were friends… after all. They didn’t even say goodbye. Nobody likes me. But with this… Everyone will do what I want! This MASK is my only friend!”

RUNNER UPS

Mask Creations (Majora’s Mask) - The deaths of Darmani, the Goron, and Mikau, the Zora, when Link dons both masks to fulfill their final wishes. Darmani, to see his son again and make the child happy, and Mikau, to spend at least one more concert with Lulu and the other members of his band.

Great Mayfly Fairy’s Transformation (Minish Cap) - The transformation at the hands of Vaati of a lovely singing fairy, with a beautiful voice. Link wistfully mentions that she looks a little like Zelda and Vaati, in a fit of mild hysteria at this point, transforms her into a horrible moth creature. Her transformation is shown to be painful and heartwrenching, as is her defeat.

Deku Tree’s Death (Ocarina of Time part 1) - The famous death of the Deku Tree, in manga format. Link is told of his quest by the Deku Tree, and that the Deku Tree is going to die in the next few minutes. Link cries and even punches the tree in a fit of anger and sadness, crying that the Deku Tree can’t leave him until the Deku Tree inevitably dies and Link must leave on his quest.

Green’s Defeat Against Vio (Four Swords part 2) - When the four Links are finally reunited, Green, Red, and Blue face Vio and Shadow in a battle to the death with Green fighting Vio. Their battle comes to a close as Green falls to the ground, seemingly stabbed through the gut as Vio walks off victorious. Red and Blue yell at Vio and cry over Green, until it’s revealed after Vio and Shadow leave that it was all a ruse and Green was only knocked out.

Zelda and Link’s Meeting (A Link to the Past) - Link finds Zelda in a dungeon, and Zelda tearfully recalls how she had almost given up hope of rescue, stating that she thought she had been all alone until Link had finally found her. Link then embraces her, stating that he heard her voice and she was never alone.

#Legend of Manga Lists #legend of zelda #ocarina of time #a link to the past #oracle of ages #four swords #majora's mask #minish cap

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muffintonic · 4 years ago

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Alright, I think i’m done BOTW 2 spamming for today. Anywho, time for some thoughts in general!

1) I hated how the shrines in BOTW were so cold and dark compared to the bright and lively nature outside (I wish they had all looked like the Master Trials challenge where there were trees and stuff incorporated inside), so I hope if we’re forced to have dungeons they’ll be more like the Wind Waker ones. 2) I hope they don’t make us use the grappling hook or anything like in Wind Waker to move around the sky islands (I hated that mechanic). 3) I’m probably one of the few people who wanted less Zelda and more of the Champions in HWAOC since i’m only really attached to BOTW (and we saw a fair amount of Tetra in Wind Waker)/apparently Zelda’s been sidelined in all the other games, so i’m hoping in vain that we get more Champions material in BOTW 2. Also, Link could stand to have some more cutscenes centered around him as well (the few we got in some of the sidequests in BOTW were great). 4) I only really somewhat care about Riju and Sidon, so I won’t mind if the new gang gets sidelined in BOTW 2 (I still think Nintendo wasted the found family/band of brothers aspect on the dead characters--I love them so much and they’re all I want!! The problem is, they’re dead and I don’t really care all that much about their replacements!!! I dunno, maybe i’m hampered by the fact that I can replay the original champions’ memories whenever I want/read their diaries, but I can’t rewatch the new gang’s cutscenes AKA i’ve forgotten their characterization since they don’t talk to me much now that the game’s over). It’d be great if they have some weaving storylines in BOTW 2 that will get me more invested in them, but currently i’m not that interested. 5) Speaking of which, I know it’s 100% not going to happen, but goddang if I don’t want the Champions to have been returned to life. Nintendo totally squandered HWAOC by not making it a true prequel/canon to BOTW (the Champions Ballad confirmed that the Divine Beasts had trials in order to be synced to the champs, so the new gen use of them wouldn’t have happened without that + Mipha thought Link had changed in BOTW yet says in HWAOC that he hasn’t changed + some scenes like “Champion Revali’s Song” never happened at all/got replaced with alternative scenes that really changed some dynamics + basically all of Revali’s time-relative characterization from his diary/pre-100 years of solitude got thrown out + I feel like Daruk got totally sidelined), so i’m still craving that Champions content. Also, I feel like it’s totally unfair that Zelda came out of 100 years totally unaged while everyone else died. Life seems to really suck for people in the LoZ universe who aren’t chosen by divine powers. 6) They’d better keep it open world and non-linear. I can’t go back to being forced to backtrack/trudge through things, I just can’t. BOTW was everything i’ve ever dreamed about in a game (truly open world + non-linear + interactive + meaningful story + lots of outfits + beautiful landscapes) with Skyrim previously being the only thing that came close to what I wanted, so I really hope BOTW 2 doesn’t deviate too much from that. 7) I really liked Kass in BOTW, but i’m not sure what direction they’d go with him in BOTW 2/i’d be fine if he sat BOTW 2 out. I worked so hard to complete all his quests in BOTW so he’d go back home to his family, GODDANGIT, KASS. 8) Someone mentioned that since the first trailer had underground aspects, we’re probably going to be playing as Zelda with the Slate there, and I agree. They didn’t make a playable model for her in HWAOC for nothing. 9) I want to be able to stable the deer and bears and stuff, but I know that won’t happen. Being able to ride the moose and rhino things from the Hebra area probably won’t happen either, but I want to ride them!!! 10) I hope there’ll be at least a few new buildings and stuff in the towns/they’ve started construction on some areas in Central Hyrule, but I guess that’ll depend on how long it’s been in-universe since BOTW. Or maybe not, considering how there’s still Karson and Hudson even though Bolson retired from Bolson Construction--insta-towns like Tarrey Town could totally be feasible if they wanted! 11) I have one foot in the camp that believes there’ll be time shenanigans in BOTW 2. HWAOC totally threw me off with it being an alternate timeline, so i’m not sure whether we’re going to be experiencing that again or time travel itself, but I definitely won’t be surprised this time around if Nintendo goes that route again (and it would be super interesting to see the Link from 10,000 years ago). I’m not entirely convinced that the Link we see exploring the sky in the second trailer isn’t our Link, mainly because he seems to still have on the blue boxers from BOTW. 12) I also heard that maybe this will be the last LoZ game ever since something something Demise something Skyward Sword something something lore from games i’ve only vaguely looked into (i’ve only ever played BOTW --> Wind Waker --> HWAOC)??? If so, it kind of sucks that I came in just when they started making games with playstyles palatable to me (I had to look up every single thing when playing Wind Waker, but BOTW let me solve things according to MY logic/I missed being able to explore in HWAOC), but at least it’ll end on a super high note/I won’t experience later disappointment, I guess. If BOTW 2 involves breaking the reincarnation cycle for the Triforcers, I would be really surprised. (On a related note, Nintendo making Ganondorf good would also be a 100% shock to me, but it would be great to end on that as a subversion. Yes, I want them to bring back the semi-complicated Ganondorf from Wind Waker.) 13) I hope they don’t rush releasing it. I heard they pushed back BOTW originally (I got it in 2019), but it came out fantastic for it! I know COVID’s been affecting things, so I really hope they’re treating their staff right and are mindful of crunch. 14) I want even more outfits (there seem to be at least two new ones, if the variant of the Hylian Tunic crossed with Link’s Champion’s Tunic counts). Give me all the outfits!!! Also, I hope we get even more hair variations in addition to the hair down option (which is all i’ve ever wanted since I saw the mod that altered the Ancient Helmet). 15) I wonder if we’re going to get a bonus for having both BOTW and HWAOC save data. 16) I wonder if we’re going to be keeping the Champions’ skills. I’m going to miss being super overpowered, if not. 17) I hope Nintendo doesn’t cave in and make surfaces climbable in the rain. Having that limiter is more realistic and Link would otherwise be too overpowered with a super climbing ability. 18) I liked BOTW’s scattered music that got more noticeable in populated areas because it was fitting for the post-apocalyptical/nature aspect. Hearing your footsteps in an open field and the buzzing of insects was super nice and prevented me from getting music fatigue (which i’d probably experience since whenever I play BOTW it’s for 5-10 hours at a time). I hope Nintendo either keeps that or makes audio options. 19) I heard that BOTW 2 is going to be super dark or something, and i’m okay with dark, but not GRIMdark, so I hope it doesn’t go that far. From what we’ve seen in the second trailer it still looks beautiful, but I hope it doesn’t do that thing that some games do where after the midpoint/a certain story point all the scenery permanently changes to be dark and scary (that’ll seriously hamper post-game playability for me if so). 20) If they expand on the Zonai, that would be super cool! Doubly cool if the time travel shenanigans involve them/ancient Link being one! 21) I kind of want windstorms to be a weather feature. We had lightning, heat, and cold, but no wind! No, I don’t count the wind geysers and the occasional breeze in Tabantha. 22) I want a chest in my house to hold more weapons than just the gear mounts. BOTW only had enough mounts for the champions’ gear, but it also had rare items like the Kite Shield and Forest Dweller’s Sword that you can’t get anymore once you use them up! 23) I want to be able to stable my horses at my house. What’s the point of that little area if you can’t stable your horse there! 24) Speaking of Link’s house: where is Zelda going to live? If the castle’s not reconstructed, it’d be neat if Link adds an extension to his house for her. 25) I hope they open up part-time jobs (think Mabinogi) as an option to earn rupees. Having to hunt for Luminous Stone deposits or feed Trott to make money can be such a chore. I think some of BOTW’s minigames/sidequests might count as those, but those minigames were either frustrating if your goal is to earn money (since most of them cost money to play in the first place and the mechanics weren’t always easy), or didn’t earn that much in general. 26) I wonder if Kilton is going to have updated items since the monsters seem to have changed. 27) I want to be able to dive underwater (mainly so I can explore the beautiful reefs over at Lurelin). A dive meter like the one from Super Mario Sunshine would be cool. Also, it’d doubly be neat if you had a separate stamina wheel for swimming and could permanently upgrade your swim/diving stamina (the speed+ swimming items just consumed your stamina faster, which was a pain)! 28) It’s definitely too late for this, but it’s a shame that the Hylians have so many face/body/hair and outfit variations, but the Zora, Rito, and Gorons don’t. The Gerudo were kind of okay with the hair and body variations, but the other races seemed to have a serious copy-paste problem. I guess technically some of the more important NPCs (ones with quests/cutscene triggers) had different coloring, but they were severely lacking in clothing variation. Also, the only old Rito was the elder??? At least the Gorons and Zora had some old folks besides their leader walking around. Very weird, but I don’t think BOTW 2 can fix any of this. 29) I wonder how they’re going to do the final boss battle, considering how epic/cinematic the BOTW 2x battle was. What can top fighting (on horseback, no less) a giant, flaming boar made out of malice? 30) I wonder what the Yiga are going to be up to, considering how Ganondorf seems to be somewhat kicking in BOTW 2.

#in other words: BOTW 2 HYPE REAL #i'm still going to queue things so there'll probably another BOTW 2 glut from me in a few days bwaha #(and probably some general BOTW stuff because MAN am i hyped)#i'm so glad i got into BOTW in 2019 because there's been content for me every year since and i am Living #botw 2

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kingjasnah · 4 years ago

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Is there the full list of brandersons favourite games reposted somewhere?

i dont think so? or not that ive seen. u can literally just sign up for the newsletter on his website but screw it ill just post them for u. it sure was a TRIP scrolling past these to get to the interlude though. undertale is on this list.....im shakign at the thought that adolin was based off ff10 tidus but i cant get it out of my head now

#10: Katamari Damaci

I love things that make me look at the world in a new way. Katamari did this in spades. It is an imaginative, bizarre vision with unique gameplay. It is like nothing else in the world and I love it for all its strangeness and occasional lack of gameplay polish.

I was transfixed the first time I played it, and have looked forward to it being remade and rereleased on multiple different consoles. I love the cute—and somehow creepy at the same time—storyline. It feels like a fever dream more than a game sometimes, and is probably the closest I’ll ever get to understanding what it’s like to do drugs.

#9: Undertale

This is an oddball on this list because I think it’s the only game that is not a franchise from a major studio—but is instead an indie game, which I believe was originally funded on Kickstarter.I loved how this felt like a novel as much as a game. It was one person’s vision; a single story told really well, with a huge amount of personality. The humor was just my kind of wonderful/terrible, and I was instantly enamored with the characters.That probably would have been enough, but it is a nice deconstruction of video games as a medium—and has not one, but multiple innovative gameplay mechanics. Together, the package left me enamored. This is a work of genius that I feel everyone should at least try, even if it ends up not being for them.

#8: Fallout: New Vegas

I have played all of the core Fallout games, and I was one of the (it seems few) who was really excited when it moved from turn-based tactics to first-person shooter. While Fallout 3 was good, it didn’t have the charm of the first two.New Vegas delivered on everything I was hoping to see. The charm was back, the writing sharp, the quests imaginative. The gameplay was engaging and branched in a variety of directions, the gunplay was solid, and the atmosphere immersive. I of course love the first two games in the series—but New Vegas combines everything I like in gaming into one package. (As a note, I own the Outer Worlds, and am looking forward to digging into it. Consider this item on the list a recommendation of other Obsidian games—like Knights of the Old Republic Two—regardless of genre, as I’ve found them universally to be superior to their contemporaries.)

#7 Super Mario World

When I was eleven, I flew (alone, which was very exciting to me) from Nebraska to visit my uncle Devon in Salt Lake City. Before I left, my father gave me $200 and told me to pay for my own meals while on the trip—but of course, my uncle didn’t allow this. At the end of the trip, I tried to give him the money, which he wouldn’t take.I mentioned my dad would take the money back when I got home, but that was okay. Well, my uncle would have none of that, and drove me to the local mall and made me spend it on a Nintendo Entertainment System. (This uncle, you might guess, is an awesome human being.)Since that day of first plugging it in and experiencing Mario for the first time, I was hooked. This is the only platformer on the list, as I don’t love those. But one makes an exception for Mario. There’s just so much polish, so much elegance to the control schemes, that even a guy who prefers an FPS or an RPG like me has to admit these are great games. I picked World as my favorite as it’s the one I’ve gone back to and played the most.

#7: The Curse of Monkey Island (Monkey Island 3)

I kind of miss the golden age of adventure gaming, and I don’t know that anyone ever got it as right as they did with this game. It is the pinnacle of the genre, in my opinion—no offense to Grim Fandango fans.This game came out right before gaming’s awkward teenage phase where everything moved to 3-d polygons. For a while after, games looked pretty bad, though they could do more because of the swap. But if you want to go see what life was like before that change, play Monkey Island 3. Composed of beautiful art pieces that look like cells from Disney movies, with streamlined controls (the genre had come a long way from “Get yon torch”) and fantastic voice acting, this game still plays really well.This is one of the few games I’ve been able to get my non-gamer wife to play through with me, and it worked really well as a co-op game with the two of us trying to talk through problems. It’s a lovingly crafted time capsule of a previous era of gaming, and if you missed it, it’s really worth trying all these years later. (The first and second games hold up surprisingly well too, as a note, particularly with the redone art that came out a decade or so ago.)Also, again, this one has my kind of humor.

#6: Breath of the Wild

I never thought a Zelda game would unseat A Link to the Past as my favorite Zelda, but Breath of the Wild managed it. It combined the magic of classic gameplay with modern design aesthetic, and I loved this game.There’s not a lot to say about it that others haven’t said before, but I particularly liked how it took the elements of the previous games in the series (giving you specific tools to beat specific challenges) and let you have them all at once. I like how the dungeons became little mini puzzles to beat, instead of (sometimes seemingly endless) slogs to get through. I liked the exploration, the fluidity of the controls, and the use of a non-linear narrative in flashbacks. It’s worth buying a Switch just to play this one and Mario—but in case you want, you can also play Dark Souls on Switch... (That’s foreshadowing.)

#5: Halo 2

Telling stories about Halo Two on stream is what made me think of writing this list.I’m sometimes surprised that this game isn’t talked about as much as I think it should be. Granted, the franchise is very popular—but people tend to love either Reach or games 1 or 3 more than two. Two, however, is the only one I ever wanted to replay—and I’ve done so three or four times at this point. (It’s also the only one I ever beat on Legendary.)It’s made me think on why I love this one, while so many others seem to just consider it one of many in a strong—but in many ways unexceptional—series of games. I think part of this is because I focus primarily on the single-player aspects of a game (which is why there aren’t any MMOs on this list.) Others prefer Halo games with more balanced/polished multiplayer. But I like to game by myself, and don’t really look for a multiplayer experience. (Though this is changing as I game with my sons more and more.)I really like good writing—which I suppose you’d expect. But in games, I specifically prefer writing that enhances the style of game I’m playing. Just dumping a bunch of story on me isn’t enough; it has to be suited to the gameplay and the feel of the game. In that context, I’ve rarely encountered writing as good as Halo 2. From the opening—with the intercutting and juxtaposition of the two narratives—to the quotes barked out by the marines, the writing in this game is great. It stands out starkly against other Halo games, to the point that I wonder what the difference is.Yes, Halo Two is a bombastic hero fantasy about a super soldier stomping aliens. But it has subtle, yet powerful worldbuilding sprinkled all through it—and the music...it does things with the story that I envy. It’s kind of cheating that games and films get to have powerful scores to help with mood.The guns in Two feel so much better than Halo One, and the vehicles drive far better. The only complaint I have is that it’s only half a story—as in, Halo 2 and 3 seem like they were one game broken in two pieces. And while 3 is good (and Reach does something different, which I approve of in general) neither did it for me the way Two did, and continues to do.

#3: Final Fantasy X

You probably knew Final Fantasy was coming. People often ask if the way these games handle magic was an influence upon me. All I can say is that I’ve played them since the first one, and so they’re bound to have had an influence.On one hand, these games are really strange. I mean, I don’t think we gamers stop quite often enough to note how downright bizarre this series gets. Final Fantasy doesn’t always make the most sense—but the games are always ambitious.Ten is my favorite for a couple of reasons. I felt like the worldbuilding was among the strongest, and I really connected with the characters. That’s strange, because this is one of the FF games without an angst-filled teen as the protagonist. Instead, it has a kind of stable happy-go-lucky jock as the protagonist.But that’s what I needed, right then. A game that didn’t give me the same old protagonist, but instead gave me someone new and showed me I could bond to them just as well. Ten was the first with full voice acting, and that jump added a lot for me. It has my favorite music of the series, and all together is what I consider the perfect final fantasy game. (Though admittedly, I find it more and more difficult to get into turn-based battle mechanics as I grow older.)

#2: Bloodborne

Those who follow my streams, or who read other interviews I’ve done, probably expected this series to be at or near the top. The question wasn’t whether Souls would be here, but which one to pick as my favorite.I went with Bloodborne, though it could have been any of them. (Even Dark Souls 2—which I really like, despite its reputation in the fandom.) I’ve been following FromSoftware’s games since the King’s Field games, and Demon’s Souls was a huge triumph—with the director Hidetaka Miyazaki deserving much of the praise for its design, and Dark Souls (which is really just a more polished version of Demon’s Souls).As I am a fan of cosmic horror, Bloodborne is probably my favorite overall. It really hit the mix of cosmic and gothic horror perfectly. It forced me to change up my gameplay from the other Souls games, and I loved the beautiful visuals.I am a fan of hard games—but I like hard games that are what I consider “fair.” (For example, I don’t love those impossible fan-made Mario levels, or many of the super-crazy “bullet hell”-style games.) Dark Souls is a different kind of hard. Difficult like a stern instructor, expecting you to learn—but giving you the tools to do so. It presents a challenge, rather than being hard just to be hard.If I have a problem with Final Fantasy, it’s that the games sometimes feel like the gameplay is an afterthought to telling the story. But in the Souls games, story and gameplay are intermixed in a way I’d never seen done before. You have to construct the story like an archeologist, using dialogue and lore from descriptions of in-game objects. I find this fascinating; the series tells stories in a way a book never could. I’m always glad when a game series can show off the specific strengths of the medium.In fact, this series would be #1 except for the little fact that I have way too much time on Steam logged playing...

#1: Civilization VI

This series had to take #1 by sheer weight of gameplay time. I discovered the first on a friend’s computer in the dorms my freshman year—and I can still remember the feeling of the birds chirping outside, realizing I’d been playing all night and really should get back to my own dorm room.That still happens, and has happened, with every game in the series. I have a lot of thoughts on this series, many of them granular and too specific for this list. (Like, it’s obvious AI technology isn’t up to the task of playing a game this complex—so could we instead get a roguelike set of modifiers, game modes, etc. to liven up the games, rather than just having a difficulty slider that changes a few simple aspects of the game?)I’ll try not to rant, because I really do love this game series. A lot of people consider IV to be the pinnacle of the series, but after V unstacked units—and VI unstacked cities—there was no way I could ever go back. If for some reason, you’ve never played this grand patriarch of the 4X game genre, it’s about starting with a single stone-age settler who can found a city—then playing through eras of a civilization, growing your empire, to try to eventually get offworld with a space program. (Or, if you prefer, conquering the world.)It’s a load of fun in the way I like to have fun, and I feel like the series has only gotten better over the years. My hat is off to the developers, who keep reinventing the series, rather than making the exact same game over and over.Now, about that request for difficulty modes...

there are runner ups but for the sake of anyone whos on mobile and cant get past a read more (first of all omg im SO sorry) ill refrain. anyway he thought WHAT loz game was the best before botw?

#mix between HARDCORE judgement and like. yea. yea ff10 was pretty good wasnt it #but i dont think its anywhere near the best of them #long post #im read mores dont work imm so fucking sorry this is so long #MOST of these games are good its just so wild its so wild its SO wild #asks #Anonymous

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okay-j-hannah · 5 years ago

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My Life is a Mess Without You

Smosh : Prompt

Damien x Reader

Word Count: 1968

Warnings: Just the most classic Damien Haas fic scenario... but I made it ENTIRELY in his point of view

Request: “20 with Damien Haas” - @caswinchester2000

Prompt:

20. “You are the least subtle person I know. Your ‘I have a secret’ vibe is literally visible from the moon.”

A/N: Damien just didn’t get it - what could he have done that would make you ignore him for so long?

Damien sighed, moving his eyes from the TV to the phone in his hand, his fingers hovering over the keyboard.

He was completely disheveled – his hair unkempt and the blue streaks fading. He had reverted to only wearing old sweatshirts and faded jeans, his glasses worn more frequently as the task to order more contact lenses seemed daunting compared to other problems.

His house was incredibly untidy with plates stacked by the sink, movies and games littering the living room floor, and piles of miscellaneous garbage speckled every surface.

Even his cats had noticed the decline in activity as Damien remained more sedentary, normally retreating to the couch upon return from work.

The Smosh Family helped with what they could, also noticing (Y/N)’s avoidance. Damien could hardly manage to keep up with filming and script reads when all his focus was residing on her.

(Y/N) wasn’t talking to him. And it was wrecking him.

Pushing his glasses back in place, he scrolled through his unanswered text messages, a pain in his chest. It had been weeks since their last sincere conversation, a moment he had replayed in his mind over and over.

It sat at the forefront of his mind as if it was yesterday. Something was definitely wrong with (Y/N), that much he was sure of.

With their daily carpool to work together, she didn’t say a single word that day. She normally was running on slight caffeine adrenaline or singing at the top of her lungs to the morning radio.

Today? Absolutely nothing.

She just stared out the window, her arms folded very tightly across her chest. It was apparent that she hadn’t been getting her caffeine; her eyes were dark and heavy from the possible lack of sleep.

Damien even attempted at a conversation, “No new ‘Ian did this’ or ‘Monica said that’ this morning?” He had a smile on his lips even if concern was consuming his gaze, flickering from the road to her turned head.

She vaguely muttered a dull response, “Haven’t seen them. Been very busy.”

“You’ve been busy? Is that why you look so tired?”

Something clicked in her brain and she finally faced him, “Hm? Oh, my coffee maker sparked a few days ago – haven’t been able to get my morning fix.” She attempted at a makeshift smile, but Damien saw right through it.

Why in Heaven’s Above would she try to hide something from him? He hated it when she felt like she had to hide from him.

As soon as they parked in the Smosh Office lot, Damien turned to give his full attention to one of his best friends.

“What’s wrong?”

She seemed taken aback, “Nothing.” She tried the handle of the door, finding it continuously locked.

“Something is obviously wrong, and I don’t think you should bottle it up.” He was leaning towards her, almost hovering over the seat compartment between them.

“I told you, I’m busy and stressed and tired,” she sneaked a half-way smile, shrugging her shoulders. “I’ve had a lot on my mind.”

Damien raised a suspicious eyebrow, “What kind of stuff?”

She seemed strained between answering and jumping out of the vehicle, “Sh-Shouldn’t we get inside? We still have work today, you know?”

He sighed at the humor she was forcing through her teeth, “You’re worrying me, (Y/N).”

“And I’m telling you there’s no reason to be.” She met his gaze but swallowed hard. Was that a blush creeping onto her face?

“And I’m telling you that I know you better than you think. And I know that something is bothering you! You can trust me – I’m your friend.”

Her gaze immediately dropped from his face at that statement. Her hands were starting to fidget in her lap, “Well… there – there might be something.”

Damien bit the inside of his cheek, anticipation consuming his worrying thoughts, “I told you I knew it.”

She let a small laugh escape, “How do you always know?”

“You are the least subtle person I know. Your ‘I have a secret’ vibe is literally visible from the moon.”

“I – I might… there’s th-this boy. And I can’t s-stop thinking about him.”

He tried to have a relaxed reaction, his focus on her continuously fidgeting hands, “A guy? You have a crush on a guy? Do I know this guy?”

She resisted a smile, “Maybe. He’s a friend.”

“Hm.” He wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about this. Something pushed him to make a retort, that she didn’t need to like another boy because she already had one right there, “Is he a good guy?”

She nodded a little more enthusiastically than he liked, “He’s very sweet and very kind. He’s always a gentleman and always does whatever he can to make me smile.”

Damien found himself holding his breath, “Do you hang with him often? Like does he consider you guys friends?”

“Oh, yes,” she sighed, keeping her gaze away from Damien’s. “I see him every once in a while and we always have so much fun. We surprisingly have a lot in common – we both like filming, we both like reading and playing games, we even have similar views on less partying and more movie nights.”

“Sounds like a great guy,” Damien gave a close-lipped smile, he had to decide between this strange feeling of jealousy and his fierce friendship with (Y/N). “You should definitely go for it – I mean, if that’s what your dilemma is. If you can’t stop thinking about him maybe you should make your move.”

He chose to be her friend first.

“I don’t know,” she bit her bottom lip, “I don’t think it’d work out – I don’t think he sees me like that. I guess I make a better friend than anything else.”

Damien scoffed, catching his genuine reaction to her words. This caused her to whip her eyes to him, confused.

“What are you talking about? Any guy would be lucky to have you! The only reason he would ever turn you down is because he’s too blind to see the perfect package right in front of him. And if that ends up being true, then good riddance because you deserve someone who thinks about you just as much as you’re thinking about him.”

Damien found his hands flailing around slightly as his smooth conversation turned a little heated; but the expression on (Y/N)’s face softened him again.

“You really think that?”

He found her wide eyes staring at him with desperate confirmation, “Why would I ever think otherwise?”

But very quickly he realized that there was still something incredibly wrong. Ever since that conversation (Y/N) had made it a special mission of hers to completely dodge every advance Damien made.

Their usual friendly greeting with the crew? She was excusing herself for the bathroom.

The walk Damien made to see how her directing was going? Matt Raub said she asked to help with editing.

The spot he always saved for her in the meeting room? Neglected as she sat far from him.

Their frequent lunch breaks together? She was nowhere to be found.

The hours they spent recording Smosh Games? She ignored his smile, plastering on an expressionless face.

The special treat he got her to cheer her up? She found him coming towards her office, so she skidded off in the opposite direction.

It was a pattern that continued throughout the entire week, something Damien was fed up with. What could he have possibly done to drive one of his best friends away?

Now as he sat on the couch sulking and dismissively scratching behind Zelda’s ears, he kept his mind trained on (Y/N).

First a confession about a boy. Days of consistent avoidance. And now it was like she hadn’t ever existed.

Damien never realized how big of a part she played in his life, staring at these past text messages with more and more regret:

III AT&T LTE 5:58 PM 23% 🔋

Mon, Aug 5, 11:26 AM

“You felt like editing today?”

1:40 PM

“Hey, are you feeling okay?”

“Is it about that guy? 😉”

Tue, Aug 6, 10:14 AM

“Has your coffee maker been fixed yet?”

3:52 PM

“I was thinking we could hangout this weekend, you down? 😊”

6:51 PM

3 Missed Calls

“Are you ignoring me?”

Fri, Aug 9, 11:38 PM

“No, seriously, (Y/N). Are you ignoring me?”

“(Y/N), if Shayne and Mari put you up to a practical joke like this, it’s not funny anymore.”

12:22 PM

2 Missed Calls

“I couldn’t find you for lunch, so I left something on your desk. Your favorite. ❤”

Wed, Aug 14, 5:09 PM

“You seemed off in SG today. Did something happen?”

7:44 PM

“I applaud your efforts in pranking me, but can you please talk to me?”

Sat, Aug 17, 10:31 AM

2 Missed Calls

“(Y/N), where are you?”

1 Missed Call

2:15 PM

“I bought you a little something to cheer you up – I left it by your bag. Will you please tell me what’s wrong? I miss you.”

There was a knock at his door – something not uncommon recently. Courtney would usually bring over some Chinese take out or Wes would drop off an early release of a game Smosh received.

So Damien thought nothing of it as he reluctantly shuffled to the door, opening it carelessly.

And there was (Y/N) – wringing her hands and cautiously looking into his shocked gaze.

“Damien,” she muttered, her face blotchy and obviously raw from crying.

He didn’t even let her a second to explain before he ran over to sweep her into a bone-crushing hug. He wrapped his arms around her, lifting her easily off the ground and hiding his face into her shoulder.

“I thought… I didn’t think…”

She pulled away, heat rising to her face as she cast her eyes down, “I… I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t know what to say or how to say it. So I just ran. But I – I’m trying something here.”

“(Y/N),” he felt his tired eyes burn, his glasses askew. “What did I do? Where have you been? I feel like I haven’t seen…”

“I’m in love with you.”

She had whispered it so quietly that he was afraid his ears didn’t hear correctly, “What?”

She swallowed hard, “I am utterly and completely in love with you Damien. And I didn’t know how to tell my best friend that I wanted to be more than just that with him. So I avoided you in hopes I’d stop getting so flustered being around you, but that only made it worse. And honestly, running away sounded like a pretty good idea until about ten minutes ago when Joven gave me an awesome pep talk – and I just…”

They stood there in silence for a few seconds, (Y/N) wringing her hands and Damien’s limp at his sides.

“This might have been the most pointless mental breakdown I’ve ever hand,” Damien finally muttered, replacing his shocked expression with a slight smile. “Did I really neglect getting more contacts because of secret feelings we have for each other?”

She didn’t seem to process what he said, “You know I’ve always liked your glass… wait – did you say…?”

“I’m in love with you too, (Y/N).” He grinned, taking a few steps towards her, “Please don’t you ever try to hide something like that from me again. I thought I’d just lost the greatest thing that ever happened to me.”

She let out an unexpected giggle, wiping at her eyes, “Greatest thing that ever happened to you?” She reached out and ran her fingers through his hair, bumping his glasses into place, “But you’re looking kinda rough.”

He reached up and grabbed her hand, holding it tightly in his, “Because there were four weeks and three days where I hadn’t talked to you once.”

“I had to bunk with Mari for a week just because I couldn’t stand not coming over here every other day,” she responded, laughing.

“We’re gonna have to change that.”

~~~

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#damein haas smosh #damien haas angst #damien haas x reader #damien haas fluff #damien haas #dames #damien haas x shy reader #damien haas x y/n #damien haas x you #smosh pit #smosh x reader #smosh fandom #smosh games #smosh

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midzelink · 5 years ago

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"#listen i know exactly how these two meet and how they start dating and it's beautiful and i LOVE THEM" Please tell me everything!

(( in reference to the tags I made on this Ilia x Ashei art ))

HOO, BOY, OKAY - where to begin? A lot of this is going to be stuff that I didn’t really want to make a post about, because my hopes were that I would eventually write their meeting and eventual dating into a multi-chapter fic of sorts (called “Love & Horses,” and there’s good reason for that, I swear), but I struggle with writing enough as-is, and by the time I do (if ever) get around to it, this post will absolutely be lost to time - so, what the heck! Lemme gush a little bit. Some of this I’ve already written about in the description of this wedding piece I had commissioned, but I’ll expand on it a bit here. (Also, shoutout to @therealflurrin for inspiring a lot of this - we somehow fell in love with these two independently of one another, which just goes to show how much potential these two have. Spread the Iliashei love!)

So, what’s important to understand about Ashei (and this is all just my headcanon, of course) going into this is that she was raised alone by her father in the Hebra Mountains, with very sparse and sporadic human contact outside of him. As she says in-game, he was a “knight in his own right,” and he “taught [her] the arts of war as though [she] was his son” - he taught her how to wield a sword, but unfortunately for her, that was pretty much all he taught her. He was a troubled man haunted by the ghosts of his past, perhaps, but he was a terrible father, and when Ashei was only fifteen years old she bested him in battle and ran away from home. She was on her own for quite some time, surviving in the harsh wilderness of the frozen wilds, but she did so aimlessly; all she had was her sword, and with nowhere else to turn, she eventually found her way to Hyrule proper, choosing to enlist as a knight solely because she would have a roof over her head and some money in her pocket. She was only sixteen at the time - she lied and told them she was twenty - and when she bested every captain in the entire royal guard in a single evening, they agreed to take her in.

Another important thing to note is that Ashei’s arrival in Castle Town (and one particular encounter with Princess Zelda herself, but that’s a story for another time) awakens The Gay within her; she’s never really been around so many people before, let alone women her own age. This has some interesting side effects, namely that Ashei has no idea how to talk to or behave around women, and it plays into the first time she and Ilia (improperly) meet.

So, picture this: a short time after the events of the game, Ilia travels back to Castle Town to visit Telma, whom she bonded following her kidnapping and memory loss. Ashei is sitting in the bar, sipping on some ale, and she hears someone come in and begin chatting; she thinks nothing of it, of course, until she takes a quick little peak -

- and sees the most drop-dead gorgeous person she has ever seen in her entire life.

She panics. Face goes completely red, she hides her face in her hand, nearly drops her ale. Her fight her flight instincts kick in, and she chooses flight, rushing out of the bar before the girl can even notice her, let alone speak to her - and though it’s a few days before she can get the image of her out of her head, eventually things go back to normal, and Ashei finds comfort in the fact that she’ll probably never see that mystery girl again.

Except, y’know - she does. Because of course she does.

Fast forward a bit, Hyrule Castle is a still a mess of being rebuilt, and the people need something to keep their spirits up - so Zelda is like, f**k it! Dance time! An outdoor ball, in the afterglow of twilight, with food and live music and all what have you. Ashei attends in a full set of royal armor, complete with helm and all the fixings, as she’s only there on guard duty, but just as soon she thinks the night is going to end without incident, who do you think she sees sitting all alone, and does she looks slightly sad or is that a trick of the light, and oh my gods that dress is lovely, was it handmade, did she make it, and what are the chances she would see her again -

Ashei is still quite flustered, of course - only this time it’s different, because here, she isn’t herself. Here, she’s just a nameless solider among many - she could be anybody - and somehow, someway, she musters up her courage to approach the young woman…and offers her hand in dance.

And I think now would be a good time to talk about Ilia’s side of things; we know a lot more about her story, of course, but it’d probably be good to mention that, yes, she did love Link - and perhaps, once upon a time, he could have loved her, too, but after everything that happened, he was unable to readjust to life back in Ordon, and as we see in the final credits, he leaves, in a scene that tells us almost certainly that he only said goodbye to her. Ilia goes through quite a lot both during the game and in the months after; romance aside, Link has always been her closest friend, and suddenly he’s so distant from her. It’s difficult to handle, and as she watches him leave after a few months of struggling with this, with no idea of when or if he’ll return, I guess you could say that she fell out of love out of necessity; he was, and always will be, a very dear friend to her, but the weight of what had happened to both of them had changed them, and their relationship would never be exactly the same as it once was. It pains her - but she accepts it, and moves on.

So, Link is AWOL for a while, yeah? Ilia has a lot going through her mind, and like Ashei did before she found a good friend in Shad and a makeshift home in the Resistance, she feels aimless. On top of that, she’s still dealing with the trauma that being kidnapped had saddled her with, and what sticks with her the most is how helpless she felt waiting for someone else to save her. Then wouldn’t you know, one day she gets a letter from Telma inviting her to festivities to be held in Castle Town, and Ilia makes up her mind about something. She packs up her things…and sets off.

The night of the festival, Ilia does take the hand of that mysterious stranger - and as they dance it’s wonderful and magical and lovely and for a time she forgets all of her troubles, but before she can see their face or even learn their name they’re gone, leaving her wanting and curious. Some time passes, and the festivities come to and end; Ilia makes for Telma’s Bar, where Shad, Ashei, and Auru are unwinding from the night’s events. Telma introduces the younger woman to the gang, and Ashei almost begins to panic, before she realizes that Ilia would have no way of recognizing her, that Telma was just introducing them to a friend, that this would pass and be done with in no time at all, but then -

“I want to join the Resistance!”

And Ashei is just like,

Ah.

Ah, shit.

This post is getting rather long, so I’m gonna try to wrap things up here - but as you can imagine, hijinks ensue! Things reach a climax when Ilia insists that Ashei teach her how to fight, and Ashei lashes out and flat-out refuses in a burst of anger, which triggers an episode of “oh my god am I turning into my father oh f**k no” and sends her running, truly panicking this time; Ilia runs after her, of course, and when she finally finds her they get to talking. Ilia tells her that whatever it is that’s bothering her, she doesn’t have to open up about it now, or tomorrow, or any time soon, but if she ever wants to, she will be there to listen - and then Ilia opens up, about why she joined the Resistance, about her kidnapping and her scars and the horror she’s endured. She chooses to be vulnerable where Ashei cannot, and then suddenly the mood is lighter, and Ashei is sheepishly admitting that she couldn’t teach her how to fight because she likes her too much, gods be damned, and Ilia is joking about how she never knew she liked girls till now because there were none her age growing up in Ordon, and Ilia thought Ashei liked Shad and Ashei thought Ilia liked Link, except Shad doesn’t like women and Ashei doesn’t like men and Link has been gone for months now, and oh, aren’t they both so stupid - and then they hear music, and Ilia stands and offers Ashei her hand, and in that moment both of them know, y’know? Ashei still has a lot of stuff she’s got to work through, and it’s not going to be easy by any means, but for now, she can do this much - so she takes Ilia’s hand and the two of them dance into the night, pushing aside their worries till morning’s light.

Do the two of them start dating pretty much immediately? Yes. Do they love one another completely and utterly? Absolutely. Do they get married and is their wedding super, duper gay? You bet your ass it is.

There’s a lot more to this that I won’t get into here, including Link’s eventual return (after three years of being away!) and the aftermath of that, and the exact specifics of Ashei’s troubled history with her father and how being with Ilia helps her to heal from it. On the plus side, Bo becomes like the father that Ashei never had, and fun fact: the two like the arm wrestle! Like, a lot! (And Ashei sometimes lets him win.)

#twilight princess #loz tp #loz #iliashei #ashei #also thanks for asking!#getting this outta my system was really therapeutic!#anonymous #asks #my asks #ilia #bezu #headcanons #stupid post tag #myposts*

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whatareyousearchingfordean · 6 years ago

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Kiss From A Rose

The Hunters in the Closet

Summary: Y/n has been hunting alongside the infamous Winchesters for years now, but when an unexpected case pops up in her hometown, she finds herself struggling not only with her feelings for the eldest brother but with the things from her past that she has been fighting to forget.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Plus size Reader

Word Count: 2.9K+

Warnings: Language, sexual tension, angst

Catch up with the series masterlist and check out Alexandra’s Library for more works by yours truly!

“Okay, Sammy. We’ll meet you at the hotel later,” Dean breathed out a sigh as he hung up his phone and slid it back into his jeans pocket. His hunting partner had her back turned to the eldest Winchester, watching for anyone who might pass them by in the currently empty hallway. When she heard his goodbye, she rounded on the green-eyed hunter, her brows raised.

“What did he say?”

“Well, it’s definitely a witch. Sam found a hex bag in the bedroom,” Dean relayed the information the taller brother had called with.

“And Alec?”

“Sam says he seemed pretty sincere,” Dean frowned. “Says the dude’s eyes were redder than if he had been three joints deep.”

“Makes sense. Besides, if it was him, you would think that he'd've gotten rid of the hex bag,” The huntress was fond of the idea of eliminating Alec from the suspect pool. She was having a hard time reconciling the image of the kid she grew up with and a witch that killed his own wife. With all this information and lack of motive, she felt more than comfortable crossing him off their list and knew the brothers would agree with her.

“That’s true. I think--” Dean’s words were cut off as someone came out of the room in which the two hunters were standing in front of. The door whacked into Y/n’s back, nearly toppling her off her feet. The eldest Winchester held out his hands as she stumbled, ready to catch her if she fell, which thankfully, never happened.

“Oh my god! I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there I- Y/N?” The sound of her name had the huntress freezing on the spot, abandoning the glare that had settled in her features for something far nicer.

“Yeah?” Her response was tight-lipped as she turned to face whoever it was that had just run her over.

“It’s me, Roger Bates,” the man smiled, the grin on his face wide and unsettling. The woman’s brow furrowed as she took in the visage of the man in front of her, her mind unable to connect what it was seeing with the memory of Roger Bates from high school.

Though Y/n’s high school experience had been hell, it was tame in comparison to what Roger Bates had endured. He was strange, even for her standard now, and she hunted monsters for a living. Being a greasy long-haired loner who was more intrigued with academia, computers, and playing Zelda all weekend long. Not that his obsessions with girls that seemed to switch every other week helped with his image. At one point, he even had his sights set on the huntress, to which she had to let him down as gently as possible, seeing as she wasn’t sure if she agreed on a date that she would make it home at the end of the night.

“Roger? Wow,” she let the word fall out in a breath, unable to form a better descriptor. The once pimply young man now had a hairline that receded further than those twice his age. The pseudo-mullet was ashy gray and Roger had it pulled back in a tight ponytail at the nape of his neck. The man was hunched over a mop bucket, his shoulders heavy with an additional fifty pounds around his middle.

“I haven’t seen you since graduation,” he noted.

“Oh yeah, well a lot has happened since then,” Y/n remarked, her classmate’s words reminding her of the demise of her family that had catapulted her into a life of hunting which was the last place she wanted to go at the moment. She took the opportunity to divert the conversation to something that had registered in her brain. “Hey, was that Damon I saw helping you earlier?”

“Technically I was helping him, Damon is the janitor here. I just offered to help for the reunion,” Roger pushed the slim bifocals on his face up the bridge of his nose, taking in the woman standing across from him. “Damn Y/n, the years have been good to you.”

“Hello, by the way,” Dean stepped around where his partner was standing, putting his body now between the old classmates. He held out his hand to the other man with a smirk.

“Oh, yes, of course,” the woman shook her head with a grin, having forgotten for a fraction of a moment that she and Roger still had company. “This is my husband, Dean.”

“Nice to meet you,” Dean’s voice was clipped as he shook Roger’s hand. The huntress watched as the two men seemed to stand up straighter as they released their gesture, bringing themselves up to their full heights. It was much in vain for Roger, seeing as even after he uncurved his spine, Dean still had several inches on him.

“I never took you for the marrying type, Y/n,” Roger noted, not looking away from Dean.

“No, I supposed in high school I wasn’t,” Y/n admitted. “But people change.”

“Not in my experience,” Roger deadpanned, finally breaking off his intense gaze with the eldest Winchester. Y/n didn’t have time to ponder his words before he continued with a cough. “Congratulations though. I suppose I’ll see you at the reunion then?”

Y/n nodded and Roger retreated down the darkening hallway, the squeak of the mop bucket he was pushing echoed off the walls until he disappeared around the corner.

“What the hell was with that guy?” Dean’s nose was scrunched on his face as he turned back to his partner.

“He’s always been that way. Just… off,” Y/n attempted to stifle her giggle at Dean’s expression.

Okay,” Dean nodded as his face relaxed into interest. “We can work with ‘off’. Off how?”

“Just off. I don’t know. Roger was your typical nerd who was obsessed with video games and school. The most suspicious thing about him was his obsessions with just about every girl in our class, but that was decades ago, I’m sure he’s over that.”

“Not according to him,” Dean quirked an eyebrow as he pulled out his phone that had just chimed. “Any bad blood between him and Sarah?”

“Not that I know of.”

“What about this Damon guy?”

“He and Roger were best friends, I mean that tells you just about everything you need to know,” Y/n shrugged. “What I went through was heaven compared to those guys. They didn’t get much relief from anybody.”

“And?” Dean urged, sensing the huntress wasn’t telling him something.

“It was two months before senior prom, and Damon mustered up the courage to ask Sarah to be his date one day at lunch. As predicted, she rejected him. Made a whole scene in front of the entire cafeteria. It wasn’t pretty,” Y/n explained the scene, the deep empathy she had for the man back on that afternoon day settling in her stomach as she recalled the events. Sarah had torn into the poor kid and the huntress wasn’t sure if anyone could have recovered from a traumatic event such as that.

“You think he has an office?”

“Um… office is a loose word.” The woman cocked her head, confused as to where her fellow hunter’s head had just gone. “The janitor had, like, a desk in the janitor’s closet.”

Dean pointed his chin down the hall towards the back of the school, and all she could do was nod in confirmation that he would find the cabinet in that region. The Winchester took off without another word, his long bow-legs carrying him quickly down the hallway.

“Where the hell are you going?” Y/n slapped her palms against her thighs before taking off after him, having to jog to catch up with his pace.

“To look for clues.”

“Clues?” Y/n huffed. “Who are you? Sherlock?”

Dean had reached the other side of the school in no time, pausing outside the heavy metal door that held a gold nameplate affixed to the front with Damon Matthews etched into it.

“No, but I am following a lead,” he smirked back at her before glancing at his surroundings and then entering through the doorway.

“What? There’s no way he did this. Damon may have been nerdy but he was the sweetest kid,” she hissed as she followed Dean inside.

The closet that doubled as an office was lined with shelving. Each one was filled with haphazardly tossed tools and cleaning supplies. A desk sat farthest away from them, papers littering the surface, the gray metal rusting in places. Y/n wrinkled her nose as the strong scent of cleaner mixed with the dank aroma of the room.

Dean didn’t comment, choosing instead to begin rifling through the paperwork littered about the desk. After watching him work, the huntress let out an incredulous huff before joining him in his search for whatever it was he thought he would find. Even if Damon was their witch, the likelihood he kept his secret manifesto in the school janitor’s closet was slim to none.

“Don’t huff at me,” Dean glanced at the woman out of the corner of his eye. “After the story you just told me, he’s the best suspect we’ve got.”

“But just so we are clear, you are saying my ‘local insight’ doesn’t matter?” Y/n made air quotes around the words he had thrown at her only a few hours prior. Dean frowned at his partner, his displeased dimples popping up in the corners of his lips.

“You know that’s not--“ Dean trailed off as the sound of keys in a lock jingled from just outside the door. Both hunters whipped their heads towards the noise, dropping whatever it was they had in their hands. The eldest Winchester turned back to Y/n and whispered, “Trust me?”

The huntress gave him a single curt nod and Dean cradled her jaw in his large hands, pulling her up to crash his lips to hers. She sucked in a gasp as her body froze upon contact. He walked her back until her body came in rough contact with one of the metal shelving units and his grasp fell to her waist.

The second her mind caught up with his actions, her arms instinctively wrapped around his neck, her nails scratching through the short hairs at the nape of his neck. Y/n could have sworn Dean growled at the contact before he curled into her and slid his hands down her thighs, urging her to jump into his grasp. Without thought or hesitation, she complied, wrapping her thick legs around his waist.

Everything besides Dean fell into the background as he filled her nearly every sense, even the click of the door’s latch. The weight and heat of his body enveloped her and she could taste the hint of cinnamon from the gum he had been chewing after breakfast. His two-day-old stubble tickled her chin where it came in contact with her skin and the familiar yet subtle scent of leather and gunpowder that always seemed to cling to him permeated her nostrils.

“Oh shit,” the voice of their guest caused Dean to pull his kisses from her lips, much to her dismay. He didn’t relent his grip on her and instead just turned his head towards the man who stood dumbstruck at the entrance.

Y/n took in the guy whose jaw was nearly at his feet. He hadn’t changed much since high school. It was how she had recognized him earlier when they were in the gym. Damon still had the round baby face he had at sixteen, only now, it was adorned with a patchy beard. He had grown maybe another handful of inches, but other than that, Father Time had gifted the man.

“Do you mind?” Dean mumbled at the guy as he wiped the mixture of their saliva from his lower lip with his thumb.

The huntress figured their situation looked just as awkward as it felt. As he had given her no warning, she could feel the heat of a blush underneath her skin, and her chest was rising and falling rapidly with labored breaths. The two hunters were full and well ‘caught in the act’ as she suspected was his ploy to begin with. Y/n had to give it to Dean, he was one hell of a quick thinker, even if his decision now had her reeling.

Dean turned back to her, a sideways smirk and cocked eyebrow on his face that she didn’t have time to discern before he was kissing her again. A moan fell involuntarily from her lips as the Winchester dug the tips of his fingers into the soft flesh of her thighs. He drank up the sound of it, sucking her tongue into his mouth and causing her core to clench around nothing.

It was her first time experiencing the feel of the man’s lips against her own as she had dreamed numerous times before. The reality of it far surpassing anything her feeble mind could have ever imagined. Dean was nothing short of a pro at everything he was doing, so much so that the anxiety of the fact of the matter had been completely washed from her brain, allowing her to just get lost in the way he was curled into her and drinking her in as she was him.

The muttered of apologies from her former classmate came before the latch clicked shut once again. Not that Dean seemed to notice, far too engrossed in his ploy to let up his assault on the huntress. Y/n peeped an eye open to see Damon was gone and reluctantly decided if she was going to come out of this moment with any portion of herself intact, she needed to unravel herself from Dean.

“Shit,” Y/n pulled her lips from his, licking the last taste of him from her swollen lips. She attempted to wiggle out of his grasp, but she was successfully slotted between him and the shelving. “Put me down before you hurt yourself.”

“Are you okay?” he frowned at her words but complied with her request, gently lowering her feet back to the cement floor below them.

“You can’t just pick me up like that.” A snort left her nose as she attempted to right the mess he had made. “I’m too heavy, you’ll hurt yourself.”

“It ain’t no sweat sweetheart. I’ve carried my moose of a brother I don’t even know how many times, your ass is nothing,” Dean drawled.

“Yeah, okay, I probably weigh more than your brother,” she grumbled under her breath, but Dean still managed to catch her words. She caught the drop in his expression and flew by the comment before he could properly respond.

“Let’s just finish this stupid search before we get someone else comes in. I do not want to go through that again.” The huntress purposefully averted her gaze and headed back to the piles of paper she had left only moments ago. It wasn’t entirely a lie. Y/n wasn’t sure if her heart could handle getting to have Dean so close once more only to have to let him go. It was hard enough to watch him walk off with his conquests without having to know the intimate feel of his body pressed firmly against hers.

“Man you really know how to kick a guy below the belt,” Dean bellyached. Y/n chanced a glance back to see his frown flip back into his signature cockeyed grin. She simply held out a stack of papers to him which he took and began to rifle through.

Between the two of them, it took only a few more minutes before they had gone through everything. Most of it was work orders and receipts that dated back to before her graduation. As suspected, there was not one shred of evidence pointing to Damon as their witch.

“Told you,” the huntress commented as she cracked open the door, peering out to check that the coast was clear for them to exit. When she was met with an empty hallway, she proceeded to pull the door fully open and walked into the low light coming through the windows.

“Just because we didn’t find anything doesn’t rule him out. We should have Sammy check his house,” Dean noted as he followed her down the hallway. Abruptly, she stopped and spun on her heel, causing the hunter to nearly collide with her.

“Did you or did you not insist that I come out here on this case because my intel on these people would give you guys an advantage on catching this witch?” she hissed at him, making sure to keep her voice low for any possible eavesdropper. Dean nodded, his expression unreadable as he waited for her to continue. “So when I tell you it’s not Damon, why won’t you believe me? Do you not trust me as a hunter?”

“Of course I trust you. You are an amazing hunter, one of the best. I just didn’t think we should overlook all the possibilities,” Dean explained, his expression softening as he realized how his actions had been perceived by his partner. “I’m sorry, Y/n.”

“Don’t be sorry. I take point on this one from now on. Okay?”

“Cross my heart,” he fluttered his hand in an ‘X’ across his chest, giving her an earnest smile. She pursed her lips before returning the grin and continuing out of the hell that housed her for four years of her life.

Part 5

#dean x reader #dean x plus size!reader #dean x plus size reader #plus size!reader #plus size reader #dean winchester #dean fic #supernatural #spn fic #supernatural fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #dean winchester fanfiction

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katedoesfics · 5 years ago

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Breath of the Resistance: Chapter 11

Link and Zelda stood on the balcony behind the palace, watching the soldiers interact with the activated Guardians below in the training fields. Link leaned against the rail curiously as the long legs of the machines moved about. The soldiers chatted and laughed as they followed the Guardians around. They climbed on top and inside, inspecting the mechanics, studying and learning how the machines worked in preparation for war. Not only were they intrigued by the machines, they were eager to see them in action.

“You’d think they just got their hands on the coolest toy,” Zelda said with a light laugh.

Zelda, too, was intrigued by the machines. Over the last few days, while they were back in the city, Zelda lost herself in her books, mulling over the ancient Sheikah texts, hoping to learn anything and everything she could about their technologies. Link often found her in the palace library, her nose so deep in a book she hadn’t even heard him come in. And when she did finally notice his arrival, she talked endlessly about something new she had discovered.

It was a side of her Link hadn’t seen much of, but it was a relief to see her so happy after the way things had been going. At home in the city, she was relaxed. She was safe. And for a moment, it was as if they weren’t preparing for an impending war. Zelda and Link could be themselves.

Link watched as she gushed over the Guardians and smiled.

“We’re able to control them now, just like we can control the Divine Beasts.” She turned to Link with excitement in her eyes. “When Ganon does show his face, he’s going to be in for a big surprise.”

But her excitement was cut short by the sound of her father’s voice.

“What are you doing out here, Zelda?” King Rhoam said from behind them.

Zelda turned quickly to see her father approaching them, his stern gaze on her.

“I…” Zelda started, hesitant. She knew her father did not approve of her scholarly studies, as he referred to them. She made a fist at her side and spoke confidently. “I was assessing the results of the experiment with the Guardians. These pieces of ancient technology could be quite useful against the -”

“I know that,” the king interrupted. “They are essential to Hyrule’s future, and our research demands that we keep a close eye on them.” His voice grew stern. “However, as the princess, you currently have a crucial unfulfilled responsibility to your kingdom.”

Zelda looked down, defeated. She knew what he was going to say next.

“Let me ask you once more,” her father continued. “When will you stop treating this as some game?”

“I’m doing everything I can,” Zelda pleaded with him.

“You are here wasting your time. You need to be dedicating every moment you have to your training.” The king’s voice rose. “You must be single-minded in unlocking the power that will seal Ganon away.”

“I already am,” Zelda said. “I want to help in whatever way I can.”

“No more excuses, Zelda!” The king said, shaking his head. “Stop running away from your duty. I forbid you to have anything to do with these machines from this moment on and command you to focus on your training.” He turned away from her and looked down onto his soldiers as they continued to work with the Guardian. His voice lowered. “Do you know how the people speak of you? They say that you are the heir to a throne of nothing. Nothing but failure.”

Zelda lowered her head in shame. Her father never missed a chance to remind her of that - that she was a failure.

“It is woven into your destiny that you prove them wrong,” he continued. He turned to his daughter, his expression softer. “Do you understand?”

Zelda did not meet her father’s gaze. “Yes,” she said softly. “I understand.” She did not look up as the king turned away and left her alone with Link on the walk. She did not move until her father was out of sight. As Link got to his feet, Zelda strode passed him in frustration.

Link trotted to catch up to her, his mind searching for some way to console her, but Zelda stopped suddenly and faced him. The frustration that creased her face was gone. Her expression was stark and cold.

“Tomorrow we will go to the Spring of Power,” she said simply. Without another word, she turned away from him and made her way to the opposite end of the walk, disappearing behind the door as it slammed shut behind her.

*****

It was early the next morning when Link saw Zelda again. After the interaction with her father, she had stormed off and disappeared for the rest of the day. And after having spent so much time with her over the last few days, Link couldn’t help but to feel empty without her. But she wanted her space, clearly, and he wasn’t about to test her and upset her even more.

So he was surprised to see that she was back to her bubbly self when she met him outside of the palace. Link watched her carefully as she slid into the seat beside him. He debated what to say to her, but to his relief, Zelda didn’t waste a moment to open her mouth.

“I was thinking,” she started before she even closed the door, “that maybe the Master Sword has some connection to the ancient Sheikah technology. I thought the slate would be connected to everything, but it doesn’t seem to work on those mysterious shrines around Hyrule. Maybe the Master Sword will have something to do with that.”

Link put the car into drive and navigated them out of the palace gates and through the city. He checked the rearview mirror as the sun glinted off the blade in the back seat. It hadn’t left his sight since he retrieved it.

“Maybe,” Link said, mulling over this information.

“What do you suppose is in those shrines?” Zelda mused. “There’s some ancient Sheikah text written on the shrines. I bet if we could decipher the text, it would give us more clues.”

Her mind raced wild with theories and Link simply could not keep up with her as she rambled on. Though she had some valid points that were worth looking into, he just couldn’t focus on anything but the mysteries behind Dorian, Impa, and even the king. He had to take advantage of their trips to the springs, but he was sure that if Dorian was a traitor, the Yiga would be following them now more than ever. He couldn’t afford to let his guard down, even for a moment.

This next week was going to be a very long week for him.

“Link?”

“What?” He could feel her watching him.

“What are you thinking so hard about?”

His eyes glanced to hers for a moment. “Nothing.”

“You’re thinking about Dorian.”

Link didn’t answer.

“I was thinking,” Zelda started. “Maybe we can trust him.”

“I’ll never trust him,” Link snapped.

“The Yiga Clan murdered his wife,” Zelda reminded him. “They tried to go after his children. His girls, Link. He wouldn’t put them in danger.”

“Makes for the perfect cover up,” Link said. “Makes him look weak and helpless and innocent.”

“How can you be so cynical?”

Link’s brows knit together. “I have no reason to be otherwise.” He met her gaze briefly. “When you’ve been used and betrayed, you learn pretty quickly that everyone has an agenda. I can’t afford to be anything but cynical.” He turned his gaze back to the road. “Dorian was my mentor. I trusted him. My father trusted him. They were best friends.” He hesitated. “Now, all I can think about is who else is involved in this. My father could have been a traitor, too, and I didn’t have a clue.”

“He wasn’t a traitor,” Zelda said softly, her eyes on her feet.

“I’m done with them,” Link said. “Done with the SFU. I only have myself to trust. I’m doing things my way from here on out.”

“You can trust me,” Zelda said.

Link turned back to her for a moment. In all his doubts and confusion, she was the one person he never doubted for a moment. The thought hadn’t even crossed his mind.

“Yeah,” he said, his eyes on the road once more. “I can. I do.”

“Okay,” Zelda said simply. “So, what’s the plan, boss?”

“The plan,” Link started, “is to take out Ganon and the Yiga Clan before they make their attack.”

“Which will be easier said than done.”

“If Dorian is working with the Yiga, then he knows we’re on to him.”

“He said their hideout was somewhere in the desert.”

“Which could be a trap.”

“We don’t have anything else to go by,” Zelda said. “And I don’t think we’ll be able to sneak around Dorian looking for clues. He’ll be on guard now more than ever.” She paused for a moment. “Dorian mentioned the desert because he wanted us to go there. But then, wouldn’t Dorian know that we would be skeptical of him? He’d know we wouldn’t walk right into the desert just because he said that’s where they are. So, that would mean he’s telling the truth, right? Or maybe he’d think that we’d think he’s telling the truth, but he’s not. Reverse psychology?”

Link furrowed his brows as he tried to follow her train of thought. “I think you’re overthinking this.”

“Or, maybe we’re not thinking enough about it.”

Link rolled his eyes. “Let’s head to the Spring of Power first,” he suggested. “The other two will be to the south. Maybe we can hit the desert while we’re there. At the very least, maybe someone in Gerudo Town will have some leads for us. If there’s anything suspicious in the desert, Urbosa would be the first to know about it.”

Zelda nodded. “Good enough for me.”

*****

It was early in the afternoon when Link and Zelda arrived at the Spring of Power. Zelda stood before the goddess statue in silence for a few moments in an attempt to clear her mind and focus on her prayers. She looked up at the goddess statue, her hands clasped together before her, but the longer she stood there, the more helpless she started to feel. She closed her eyes and prayed with every ounce of energy she had, but still the voices remained silent.

She looked upon the goddess statue and let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. She stared at the statue for a moment, her shoulders dropping, and she began to mumble to herself.

“I’ve done everything I’ve been told to do to find this power,” she said to no one in particular. “Prayer is supposed to awaken my power, or so everyone tells me.” She let her hands drop into the water, her eyes cast downward. “Everyone in my family has heard the voices from the spirit realm. This power that has supposedly been passed down through the generations is supposed to develop within me. But I don’t hear… or feel anything!”

She turned her gaze back onto the statue. “Curse you!” She let her fists punch at the water. “I’ve spent every damn day praying, pleading to the ancient gods, but to no avail. She brought her hands up across her chest, gripping at her arms. She closed her eyes in an attempt to hold back her desperate tears. “Please just tell me. What is it? What’s wrong with me?”

Link stood just outside of the spring and, upon hearing her voice, walked in curiously. He watched as she muttered to herself, her desperation growing as she struggled to find her power. He felt helpless, wishing there was something he could do to help her or reassure her, but there was nothing.

Zelda moved across the spring, away from the goddess statue, her head hanging low in defeat. She stood before Link, her tears dripping off her cheeks and onto the ground.

“What if I can’t do it?” she said softly. “How can this world depend on a failure of a princess who can’t even awaken the power needed to seal Ganon away?” She met Link’s gaze. “Is it all just a lie? What… What’s wrong with me?” She let herself fall into him, burying her face into his shoulder as she sobbed.

Link hesitated for a moment, then wrapped his arms around her. He leaned his head against hers and sighed. “Nothing’s wrong with you,” he whispered to her.

“Something must be,” she said. “The war hasn’t even begun and I’m already failing.”

“We’ve only come to the first spring,” he reminded her. “Don’t give up yet.”

Zelda shook her head. “My father has pushed me day after day, ever since I can remember, to find my power. If I haven’t found it by now, no spring is going to help.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that,” Link said.

Zelda pulled herself away and wiped at her eyes. “When did you become such a believer of all this sacred magic?”

Link shrugged. “I’ve seen some weird stuff since we started.”

Zelda chuckled lightly. “The Sheikah have rubbed off on you.”

“They have made some pretty incredible technology, I’ll give them that. Especially considering how little technology there actually was back then.”

“I can’t even imagine what Hyrule was like thousands of years ago.”

“Come on,” Link said. He pulled at her hand, leading her away from the spring and towards the car, but when Zelda’s fingers squeezed his, he pulled away quickly and shoved his hands in the pocket, then proceeded to fumble for his keys. “Where next?” he asked as he opened the car door and slid inside.

“I guess to the Spring of Courage,” Zelda said as she slid in beside him.

Link started the engine. “Faron Woods or bust.”

#breath of the resistance #chapter 11 #botr11 #loz #legend of zelda #valtteri bottas #breath of the wild #fic #fanfic

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popwasabi · 5 years ago

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Remembering My Hero, Robin Williams, Five Years Later

Not terribly long ago I used to deride others for feeling sad in the wake of a famous celebrity’s death.

My argument would go something like in the grand scheme of things their deaths “didn’t matter” when compared to various other atrocities and terrible, tragic things going on in the world. I even wrote an entire opinion piece poo-pooing the general populace for being sad in the wake of Whitney Houston’s death waaay back in 2012 for my University paper back in the day all largely because since I didn’t feel anything no one else should essentially.

Then Robin Williams died.

Well, more accurately Robin Williams committed suicide then everything changed for me.

To this day, I can’t recall a single death that has affected or beat me down more than this famous, larger than life comedian’s all too early passing and it still eats me up every time I think about it even five years later. You see, Robin was something of a hero of mine, an uber talented and charismatic funny man who seemed to perform his comedy with the kinetic energy of a hurricane and his humor often brightened my darkest moments growing up.

For him to die the way he did was beyond devastating for me.

Every 90s kid grew up on his various memorable performances. Whether it was “Aladdin” as the Genie, Peter Pan in “Hook” or masquerading as a nannie to win his family back in “Mrs. Doubtfire” we all had one performance that made us all fans early on.

(For some reason I always remember “Flubber” first though haha)

I didn’t start to truly appreciate him though until high school when I discovered his comic stand-up routines from his earlier years.

Despite not growing up in 70s or 80s his humor was nonetheless electric, unlike any previous comic I had seen up until that point and his impressions of Ronald Reagan, Henry Kissinger and Richard Nixon are still among my favorites. Live at the Met is an all-time favorite comic stand-up performance and much later Live on Broadway still has one of the greatest closing jokes ever:

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(”Harder than Chinese Algebra” is definitely a line I’ve used in my college years)

What I loved most about his performances was that he could be boisterous and sincere at the same time. Being both genuine and vulgar simultaneously and in the best way. Weave bizarre character references into personal tales of his own life. Tell a multitude of hilarious stories and references at 100 miles a minute like a comedic roller-coaster ride that lasted the duration of his performances and you never wanted to get off it. It’s true when Time Magazine referred to his comedy as something all comedians loved and respected but could never in a million years duplicate. Robin was a one of a kind talent, the penultimate original, and fans loved him for it.

Robin did his performances with such natural gusto and spontaneous hilarity that it might shock you to know he always wrote virtually every line of his stand-ups before his performances. To bring that humor to life with such infectious joy takes real talent and no one can ever deny Robin was one of the best if not the best at it.

The remarkable thing is on top of his stand-up the dude was an all-time great actor on top of that displaying ranges from as absurd as “Death to Smoochie” and “World’s Greatest Dad” to as sensitive and thought provoking as “Good Will Hunting” and “Dead Poet’s Society.” Robin wasn’t afraid to show a darker side either in famous roles such as “Insomnia” and “One Hour Photo.” His range was simply amazing.

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(Personally my favorite^)

Like many high-schoolers, I was angsty teenager prone to hormonal anger and twitches, depressed I couldn’t score girls and that I wasn’t popular but at the end of the day I always had Robin to cheer me up.

As I became more and more a fan I’d read more into his life learning I actually had quite a few things in common with the famous funny man from a love of all things sci-fi including even anime and Warhammer to a deep appreciation of video games as he famously named his daughter Zelda after the titular Nintendo princess of the same name.

He was not just a comedian to me; he was one of us. America’s favorite funny, semi-secretly nerdy uncle and I loved him for it.

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(The sweetest Nintendo commercial ever. #uglycrying)

I would carry my love of this magnificent comedian into college where I would routinely re-listen to his greatest hits when I was at my lowest of lows and boy did I have plenty of them during this period of my life and many of them revolved around suicide.

For reasons that are too personal to expand on, I had a friend who I was close with early in college who had some deep mental health and abandonment issues. She would constantly fear the worst out of others’ intentions and whether I would stick around with her to help her through it all in life. This put a heavy drain on myself and eventually it broke me enough to just attempt to cut her out of my life.

So, she threatened to kill herself when that happened.

If you’ve never tried talking someone down out of suicide before it is by far the scariest thing I have ever had to do and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. To try to reason with someone who is convinced that their life is meaningless that no one cares about them that they are better off dead than alive is unlike any terror I’ve ever experienced. What scared me the most was what I would do with myself if I failed to talk her down. Could I live with myself if I couldn’t do enough to save this person? Is the blood on my hands too since it was my actions that drove her to this point?

Well, long story short, I did succeed in talking her down but it left a tremendous mark on my soul that I don’t think I’ll ever forget (it also would not be the last time this would happen). I did eventually move on from this person (for both our sakes) but the depression it left within in me still stings.

There are limits to emotional dependency that we should all understand and in my need to fix everything for those I cared about I started not to care about myself and it damn near killed me. You should always try to feel empathy and help those who are need but you can’t forget about yourself in this regard because it will destroy you too. Painfully and slowly.

That semester I listened to probably more Robin Williams than I ever had in the past. His humor keeping me from being an unfeeling zombie and my mind from breaking from the stress of that year (there were other events that compounded what was going on.) Robin kept me going, kept me laughing in a period I didn’t have a lot to feel joyful about and I’ll always be grateful to him for that.

Then a few years later, as well know now, on August 11, 2014 Robin took his own life.

Like most everyone else I was shocked, distraught, and in total disbelief. How could a man who had seemingly endless joy and lived by all measures a far more successful life than most people ever would feel the need to kill himself?

It was tragic beyond comprehension.

The aftermath of course was an outpouring of love and support to the Williams family particularly his children but there was also the detractors as well. People who denounced him as some sort of coward for taking his own life, Christian zealots who believed he was rotting in hell for his sin and all matter of bad takes regarding him being too privileged to be depressed. It was infuriating and broke my heart all at once. Here was a man who more than most probably deserved a happy ending, dead by his own hands and now subjected to dumb moronic statements by people who probably will never understand what depression does to someone.

You’d would only need to a modest amount of research to understand where Robin’s depression could come from though. Despite growing up in an affluent household his father and mother were rarely there with him, raised practically by the maids in his household and by himself most of his childhood. He had survivor’s guilt for being in the same room John Belushi died in many decades prior (which would become a wake-up call for his own drug addictions). Also, he was great friends with the late Christopher Reeves who went to school with him Julliard and that shouldn’t require too much explaining there.

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(Personal pain never stopped Robin from lampooning himself of course)

But the real death knell probably came at the end when months prior Robin’s suicide he was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia Association and early stages of Parkinson’s disease. Now anyone being diagnosed with these conditions would be devastating by itself but if you frame it in the mind of Robin Williams, a man who’s comedy and charm relies almost entirely on spontaneous-ness, extreme attention to detail and constant joy this is like losing the very thing that made you who are, what people love you for; your core identity.

Robin was no longer going to be Robin.

I’m not asking people to like suicide or accept every instance of it but people should try to understand why and not judge others for it. Sometimes the demons are just too strong and we can’t fault others especially a mind as crippled as Robin’s was at the end.

If there’s one positive that came out of Robin’s suicide, it’s that the conversation on depression and mental health has notably shifted since that time. In the years since, it’s more acceptable now to feel sad no matter what your background is; you didn’t need to be a coal miner with black lung or a soldier with PSTD to be acceptably depressed anymore (and no, before any of you start I’m not judging those people). Athletes and celebrities alike such as Demar Derozan, Ryan Reynolds, Serena Williams, and Chris Evans have all come out about their own personal struggles with their inner demons. It’s now okay more than ever to feel inadequate even if on paper you have ever reason not to feel that way.

Though society hasn’t become completely understanding of mental health issues yet society is still a lot more open about it than it was before at least. It’s not a silver lining, don’t make that mistake with what I’m saying, but it’s comforting in a strange way knowing that even in death Robin can inspire positivity.

It’s a shame and tragic that Robin didn’t get age gracefully into his twilight years and given the current state of the country and the world as a whole we could definitely use that trademark wit to lampoon our reality right now but I’m glad that Robin helped keep me going in my most formative years.

(I mean seriously though, could you imagine Robin getting a crack at this motherfucker today on stage?)

It’s not hyperbole to call Robin Williams one of the greatest entertainers of all-time and though his time in this world was cut short by his own hand he has still left an indelible mark on myself, his fans and the rest of the world. Depression and mental health is a fact of life, generally speaking all of us will struggle with it at some point but if we can get help early and not be afraid to ask for it or even cry for it then maybe the world won’t feel so dark for us all.

So please, let’s all remember to take care of ourselves whether that’s seeking friends or professional guidance. There is strength in sadness, power in grief and love when you are lonely. You owe it to yourself to seek help and trust me, there’ll be arms open to bring you in.

Because you matter.

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Thanks, Captain.

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xylianna · 7 years ago

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🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟 I have had a lot of rum today and will totally star for star with you....of course I will probably be sober by the time you get to this... MORNING RUM IT IS!!!!

48 STARS? SERIOUSLY DO YOU WANT MY LIFE STORY? CAUSE YOU’RE ABOUT TO GET IT.

1. my first pet was a rabbit named Carmel

2. my first cat was a yellow tabby named Orlith (Moreta’s queen dragon in the Dragonriders of Pern books)

3. my other two cats have been named Wolf and Lynx. Wolf is my old lady cat, 18 years old. Lynx I had to rehome when I moved a few years ago. Orlith died years ago, the poor thing.

4. I learned how to hunt because I live in an area that is THE THING and also animals are tasty. I spent hours tracking a damn pheasant on my first hunt but because of my shitty eyesight/lack of depth perception, couldn’t see it, so my dad shot it. He still credited me with the kill since I tracked it.

5. I like to go fishing, if by fishing you mean “sit on the boat and read a book because its pretty on the water”

6. I like spreadsheets a little too much. Google Sheets means I can have them EVERYWHERE.

7. I love to sing, and its the one thing I’m actually a bit arrogant about. At least, I feel like its arrogance. Maybe its just being truthful? I have a really good voice. I trained it for a lot of years. it’s one of the few things I can do that almost always lifts my mood.

8. I hadn’t seen any live concerts in ages, and then in 2016 I saw Final Fantasy A New World and the Legend of Zelda: Symphony of the Goddesses

9. I have next to no confidence in anything outside my singing and it still boggles my mind that people like my writing. this isn’t me fishing for compliments, I’m honestly astounded. I read other people’s stuff and I’m blown away that those same people like mine, when theirs is just so fucking amazing.

10. sometimes I go anywhere between a day or a week without contacting anybody just to see if anyone bothers to talk to me if I don’t reach out first. the results usually make me more sad than before I tried. and make me question most my ‘friendships’.

11. I’ve been single for two years and I kinda hate it, but don’t expect it to change anytime soon. part of the reason is i’m picky AF. most of the reason is I have little to no social life.

12. I’m pagan and I am deeply spiritual but I generally don’t discuss it at all if I’m not asked by a close friend, because to me spirituality and religion is DEEPLY personal

13. I have never slept with a woman who hasn’t decided afterwards that she’s straight. this is probably why I’ve dated so few women. while logically I know there’s no correlation between my performance and their declarations (especially as my more recent ex-gf is dating another woman now), its still a pretty big ego blow.

14. Sorry I just answering this to sing for like 10 minutes. Currently trying to type while singing “Missing” by Evanescence. ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST!

15. i hate going to movies alone and will actively buy people tickets just so I don’t have to

16. I hate cooking for just me when my son isn’t home, so instead I tend to batch cook and freeze a bunch to enable lazy dinners down the road

17. I’m a really good cook :D

18. Tomorrow I play D&D! I play once a month with a small group of family and friends. This is the third group I’ve had for the same campaign and I don’t think I’ll ever see the end at this rate, haha.

19. I also play WoW. In WoW, I play Xylianna, the Paladin. In D&D I play a Fighter. I like swords okay?

20. work sucked this week but I have rum now :D

21. I had cancer when I was 17. In 2 months will be my 18th anniversary of being cancer free. I celebrate that more than my birthday, or my wedding anniversary before I was divorced. Nothing gets you to pare the bullshit out of your life faster than getting that diagnosis, let me tell you.

22. HOW THE FUCK AM I ONLY ON NUMBER 22 WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME *gets a third drink*

23. In my local kink community, my ‘scene name’ is one of my first OTP’s.

24. If 23 didn’t warn you, I’m going to talk about BDSM now. I’m a switch insofar as I’ll top without any real hint of dominance since I LOATHE the responsibility of being a dom. Iggy in Discretion/What Would Happen is totally based off me, because I vastly prefer to give over control since my entire fucking life is me running everything. I run my dept at work, I run my house, I run my gaming group, I run my karaoke group. Sometimes I just need a break okay?

25. also gimme dat pain

26. and I’ll give you some, too, because I enjoy service topping

27. Consent is Sexy, okay? I go out of my way to portray consent being constantly re-established in my bdsm fics particularly, because its never okay to assume that just because I was allowed to do X last week, its okay to do X this week. I mean obviously in an established relationship, it would be different, but even then CONSENT AND COMMUNCATION, SO FUCKING SEXY

28. I wish I could play a string instrument. I bought a guitar and tried to learn it but it turns out I am not good at teaching myself something so different from what I already know, haha. Chords are confusing to me for some reason. Or I made them more confusing than they had to be.

29. I am embarrassed to admit how many years its been since I picked up one of my clarinets. I wish I could find a local ensemble to join, but, that would mean reaching out and asking and aahhhhhh *hides*

30. I would also totally lose my shit if I could find a choral group to join that wasn’t attached to a Christian church. no offense at all to christian churches, but I feel a bit dishonest joining a group connected to a faith I don’t share, you know?

31. when I go to xmas eve church with my mom at her church, my brother-in-law’s mother does indeed make me join choir for that night, and its great!

32. i’m intensely lonely most of the time but I pretend i’m not because indulging in the feeling won’t change anything. and tbh part of it is my fault for isolating myself.

33. I have chronic severe depressive disorder coupled with a side of anxiety. So I feel like shit, and I worry about it, LOL

34. Prior to November 2017 NaNoWriMo, I hadn’t written in over 10 years, save for a couple 300ish word short stories.

35. part of me is terrified certain family members will find my AO3/Tumblr. I actually talked to my psychologist about this fear at my last appointment. We agreed that if they go to so much trouble as to find my internet alter ego, they deserve to be offended by my work. Fuck ‘em.

36. just once I wish I could feel the support I give my family given to me. I have one supportive family member and its not even blood. my brother-in-law is my best friend, for real. my Warder (if you follow WoT), bonded in balefire. I wish the rest of my family would care about me, but I’m working on accepting they just won’t.

37. I love learning languages for the same reason I love studying music, and I love writing - my goal is to communicate as effectively as possible, make people really understand, and the more avenues open to me the better

38. when I get a little drunk, I forget English and speak a mashup of Spanish, German, and Japanese

39. I have to go to karaoke tomorrow night for the first time since I was sexually harassed at karaoke last October, and I’m kinda terrified

40. I get very down on myself when I realize in my writing I do no world building and very little serious plotting. I basically write angst, or love, or smut. I’m trying to be okay with that, but I admit I feel like I don’t do a good enough job.

41. wow way to kill the mood, Xy. honestly, if anyone is still reading this, you get a fucking medal. i’m not that interesting, and I probably should have stopped writing this long ago.

42. I really wish life would give me a fucking break, you know? but that’s not how it works. you gotta make your own breaks, and I’m too gods-damned tired to try at present. Maybe I’ll try later this year.

43. I wish I lived alone. Ironic, since I’m lonely 99% of the time. But having a roommate isn’t the same as having companionship and sometimes I just want to not listen to someone else’s blaring TV or have someone else walk thru the house while I’m writing at the table or have someone comment on my singing (even if its complimentary)

44. WOW I GOT DEPRESSED LETS LIGHTEN THINGS UP SHALL WE? I love apple scented shit.

45. I own at least 10 pairs of kitty ears, and two tails. In fact I am wearing ears to karaoke tomorrow. Meow.

46. I want the relationship I write for Gladnis in my Discretion series BUT I’M NOT HOLDING MY BREATH FAM

47. my son is 8 yrs old and he’s honestly the best thing i’ve done with my life, and he is the thing I am most proud of, even topping my joy in beating cancer

48. in 2016 I lost 120 pounds. in 2017 i gained 30 back. in 2018… we’ll see.

HOLY FUCK THAT WAS HARD I DESERVE MORE RUM NOW OKAY

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shsl-shipper-gamer-fangirl · 7 years ago

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Dangan Thieves AU - The Circus of a First Palace

A/N Finally! An actual fic for the dangan thieves AU. I think it’s a good 6k draft (I’m a bit rusty, sorry!) Also please take note that I’m going to skip the tutorial and awakening scenes so we can jump right into the first palace! But first! Gotta thank these awesome people for inspiring me! Send them lots of love please!

[concept art Palace Ruler Chisa 1] [2] @ministarfruit

[first summary] @annsparksthegmr

Beloved Teacher and Ringmistress

“Chisa Yukizome. Hope’s Peak Academy. Circus.”

“Commencing navigation.”

All it takes are three keywords and a mysterious app to see just how despairing someone’s heart can be.

Once the dull throb inside their heads subside, so does all form of rationality. What once was the school is now replaced by a circus tent. Spotlights surrounded it, making it hard to miss among the drab concrete buildings. There aren’t even cognitive students loitering around, after all they are most probably the performers inside the tent. From afar, a crowd cheers, over what they’re not sure. If there’s anything they are certain of it’s that this is no dream.

This is reality. This is the reality as seen through their teacher’s eyes. This is a despairing palace.

This is Miss Yukizome’s Palace.

“No matter how many times I see it, it’s still… sad,” Chiaki— Bonnie says with a dejected sigh. She’s already transformed into her Dangan Thief outfit, prepared but not as enthusiastic. “To think that someone like Miss Yukizome has a palace… It’s a plot twist but I don’t like it one bit.”

“Me neither. But this is what we’re up against,” Hajime— Ace says with a face that isn’t exactly thrilled about this either. He readjusts his gloves out of nervous habit. “I don’t like the idea of confronting her like this but this is only way that might get through her at this point.”

“I don’t want to hurt her but… I don’t like how she’s hurting the others. I just want our old teacher back,” She contemplates morosely. If she was still the same Chiaki then maybe she wouldn’t have done anything. But she’s different now. She won’t let herself be a helpless npc. This time she’s going to be the best playable character. “Let’s go talk some sense into her, Ace.”

They enter the circus tent shortly after and explore until they eventually reunite with Monomi at a safe room.

“Uwawa! You came back!” Monomi cries as she hurls herself at them, only Bonnie catches her though she doesn’t seem to mind the cold shoulder from Ace.

“Not like we had a choice. Us coming back has nothing to do with you though,” Ace comments it goes ignored.

“Were you lonely, Monomi?” Bonnie affectionately pets the bunny mascot.

“Just a bit!” Monomi pulls back, she wipes off the tears from her button eyes and puts on a sweet smile. “But I’m okay now that you two are here! Are you going to steal the treasure?”

“No, we just came here to visit you,” Ace says sarcastically.

“Is that so? Ehehe, that makes me so happy!” Monomi blushes and shuffles her feet shyly.

“…” Ace doesn’t react at first. He doesn’t know how to react to this. So he doesn’t. At all. “Anyways, we’re going to look for this treasure now.”

“Oh! Oh! Let me help!” Monomi excitedly hops towards him with her arms raised in volunteer.

“No offense but we don’t even know what you are, much less what you can do,” He shot her down.

“It’s alright. Let her help,” Bonnie counters him with a smile that was more reassuring than the third party in question.

“What.” Ace shoots her an incredulous look. “Why? You can’t tell me that she isn’t suspicious. Besides, I don’t think we can afford to babysit her.”

“You don’t need to worry about me! I can defend myself pretty well!” Monomi puffs proudly at first but then shrinks back to awkwardly shuffling her feet. “Actually, the shadows don’t attack me for some weird reason… So! I definitely won’t hold you down since I won’t need defending!”

He points at her in accusation. “Okay first of all, that sounds suspicious as hell.”

“Or convenient for us,” Bonnie amends. She’s taking this new information too well that it has Ace concerned. Did that seriously not raise any alarms? She sure didn’t look that alarmed though. Then again, this is the same girl who sleeps through alarms that could save her life. She’s too complacent around alarms apparently. “She won’t hold us back and that’s all that matters. For now, shouldn’t it be fine?”

No, it definitely wasn’t fine. But Ace feels like he couldn’t win this argument anyways, at least not without a worse headache than this. They’ve already wasted enough time as it is. Might as well just go along with it just to get it over with and hope this won’t be their downfall. “Fine. But we’re not going to wait for you if you get left behind.”

Bonnie mouths a ‘thank you’ at him and then she turns to their guest party member. “You hear that, Monomi? You’re coming with us, probably.”

Monomi jumps, overjoyed. “Yay! I pwomise you, I won’t be a pwoblem!”

They’re Dangan Thieves trying to steal from the ringmistress of this circus filled with shadows out to kill them. Ace thinks that a walking stuffed toy is the least of their problems.

Well at least Monomi was somewhat helpful. She was able to find a map so there’s that. Ace had to hold back a comment about how any of them could have found it, it just so happened that Monomi was walking in front so she’d see it first. Bonnie was encouraging Monomi too much.

They traversed through the circus according to the map. There were four main levels and upon exploration, they were able to discern the specific themes for each level. There was a clown level aka nightmare fuel level, they never talk about it. There was a human performer level which would have been amazing if only they didn’t recognize some of the faces of the cognitions. There was even an animal level, those shadows were more brutal than cute.

Perhaps even more bizarre than the levels themselves, was the main mode of transportation.

“I’m not afraid of heights but I’m starting to reconsider,” Ace comments as slowly walks on a tightrope with his heart hammering in his chest. He can never be too careful since one misstep could land him dead. Meanwhile Bonnie just speedwalks right ahead of him. How does she even do that? Does she have a cheat code or something? “How are you so calm on these?”

“Why shouldn’t I be calm?” Bonnie asks without a single tremble in her voice, as if they aren’t walking on a trapeze wire that’s above a god knows how deep chasm. He had a feeling that if he wasn’t on the wire, she’d be jumping across it instead. “I’ve played lots of games with tightropes so I’ve gotten the hang of it… I think.”

“Bonnie, I know you’re into games and all but that is not how this works,” He tries to correct her thinking, he tries so hard.

There is no doubt in his mind that videogame skills do NOT transfer in real life, especially tightrope skills. Why does she make it sound like it makes so much sense when it doesn’t?

She even says it so innocently that it physically pulls a deep sigh from him. Maybe it’s because this is a cognitive world. Her ignorance transforms into unprecedented skill here. Yeah, right. “I mean, aren’t you the least bit scared of falling?”

“But I’ve never fallen in videogames?” She replies, honestly confused at what he was getting at.

“That’s not— Ack!” He loses his balance and for a moment, he thinks he sees his life flash before his eyes. He snaps out of his reverie through pure spite at the fact that his life was boring. He recovers his foothold with some effort on his part. Then there’s Bonnie, already at the end, watching him with curious eyes. He gives up. “You know what, forget it. Why do I even ask?”

“Ah. There’s a cannon here we can use.”

“That better shoot us to a safety net because I’m still pissed at the shadow trap the last one shot us into.”

It did land them on a safety net but as they were about to find out, it was just a false sense of security.

“Another cannon? What the hell?”

They landed on a glowing safety net but surrounding them was pitch black. There was no floor or tightrope to walk on, just darkness. However once they climbed that net, they found four cannons at the top, one for each corner. Each cannon was aiming at a different direction, at what exactly they couldn’t tell. It was far too dark to see anything other than the glowing safety net.

Until there was fire. Several fires actually.

“Seriously? Rings of fire?” Ace asks, already dreading where this was going.

“This feels very Zelda-esque. I think these cannons will lead to more cannons but there’s only one true path,” Bonnie analyzes at the top of her head. She claps her hands in appreciation. “Amazing! I’ve always wanted to try solving this kind of puzzles outside of videogames!”

Ace however, didn’t share her enthusiasm. “Didn’t we already meet our quota for puzzles at that house of mirrors?”

That puzzle in particular was more confusing than it should have been. Ace still feels a hole where his pride used to be since Bonnie knew how to solve it at a glance while he just wasted half an hour in there. How was he supposed to know that he had to look at the backgrounds that the mirrors reflected? He was too preoccupied comparing his own actual reflections which looking back, was obviously a lost cause. Anywhere he looked, his reflection was warped in some way.

Hell, there was even this one mirror which he was sure was broken since it wasn’t reflecting him at all. It was reflecting some dude with long black hair and red eyes. That was just plain unsettling.

“Only lazy dungeons have one type of puzzles. You got to give our teacher credit for creativity,” She shouldn’t be praising this torture palace but that’s what it sounded like. At least someone was enjoying this. She turns to him with expectant eyes. “So how should we do this? Should we split or stick together?”

“Let’s just take turns shooting each other I guess.”

Eventually they solve the puzzle with ease but not without grudge. And here Ace thought he hated trapeze wires but it doesn’t come quite close to his animosity towards cannons. How many times did he get blasted off them? Too many in one lifetime. At least this puzzle was pretty straightforward so he couldn’t complain, as much. He can still hear ringing in his ears.

Not long after that, they finally arrive at the Treasure Room. It’s more anti-climactic than it sounds.

“This is the treasure? Doesn’t look much of a treasure to me,” Ace comments on the floating blur in front of them. The only hint that it was some sort of treasure was that it was the last room and by default, it should be the treasure. That and sometimes it sparkles or at least he thinks so if he squints hard enough.

He is not impressed. “Don’t tell me this is another puzzle.”

“Hmm… Not a puzzle but maybe it’s a locked key item?” Bonnie suggests thoughtfully. “Maybe there’s a certain condition we need to clear first before we can get it.”

“That’s right!” Monomi suddenly pipes in. “Right now, the treasure is distorted just like everything else here. To steal it, we need to transform it into something physical.”

“How exactly do we do that?” Ace asks with his usual skepticism.

“By having the Palace Ruler conscious that her treasure’s about to be stolen!” Monomi says it matter-of-factly.

“Doesn’t the Shadow Chisa already know that we’re going to steal it though?”

“No, not that one. The one you should target is the Miss Chisa in your world,” Monomi corrects and then adds on, “This world is built from the real world. Remember how you two had ambushed her in her office and how that opened a level here? It’s the same principle.”

“I see. So if we tell the real Miss Yukizome that we’re going to steal her treasure then she’ll be conscious about it enough to actually have the treasure manifest here… or so I think,” Bonnie concludes with honed logic.

“That’s exactly it! Good job!” Monomi flails her arms in cheer. She’s proud that her students learn fast.

“So what? We just tell her something vague like, 'we’ll steal your treasure’, just like that?” Ace holds his chin, contemplating. His lips form a straight line. He doesn’t like this plan at all. “I don’t know about this. It feels like an express ticket to expulsion.”

“Don’t worry! You don’t have to actually do it yourselves. Or rather, you don’t need to reveal your identities!” Monomi cheerfully reassures them. “As long as 'someone’ is out to get it then the effect should be the same.”

“Got it. Leave this to me.” Bonnie raises her hand enthusiastically. Her face is determined but also just barely hiding her excitement. “I’ve always wanted to try something like this.”

“Wait, what something? What exactly do you plan to do?” He asks in concern but she just smiles coyly.

“It’s a surprise.”

Sending a calling card was definitely a last surprise.

Not just one calling card but several in fact. They practically littered the school. They were scattered on the ground outside, and on the floor inside, some were posted on the walls. They were hard to miss. How did she even get to print this many without getting caught? How did she post them all without getting caught?

And yet here was Chiaki, playing nonchalantly, still not caught.

He walks towards her and whispers discreetly, “Hey, isn’t this a little bit overboard? Shouldn’t one calling card to her desk be enough?”

“Maybe… if we were already famous.” She shrugs. She doesn’t pause the game but she continues the conversation, “If it were you and only you got this card, what would you have thought?”

“Someone has too much free time on their hands?”

“Exactly. It’ll come off as a prank and it’s easier to contain it into a private incident. Something she can control.” She stops talking when a few students pass them by and then whispers in a low voice, “But this? This is public humiliation. This will at least cause a panic and an outrage at most.”

“I see… Posting on the whole school level does make it look high priority.” He has to admit, this was a well thought out plan. Impractical as it may seem at first glance, the reasoning behind it was on point. There’s just one concern left. “Do you think it worked though?”

She doesn’t answer. She doesn’t need to answer.

Because someone else makes the answer known for them.

“What rotten oranges! The most rotten of all fruits!” They turn around and see Miss Yukizome shouting furiously, already sweeping a pile of calling cards. “To think that someone would go so far? I don’t think they understand just who they are messing with! I will find the brats behind this. After all, rotten oranges should be either thrown or buried.”

And while Hajime was sweating bullets from that obvious death threat, Chiaki seemed to take the news better.

“It looks like we have a treasure to steal,” She states with a triumphant look.

—

Dear Ringmistress Yukizome

Your despairing desires have turned this school into a circus. You no longer treat students as they should be, instead you educate them mercilessly. This distasteful show has gone long enough. We have come for you to repent and so we are going to steal your heart.

Sincerely, The Dangan Thieves of Hope

“Did you really think you could steal my treasure?

This school is my circus and I am its ringmistress! You rotten oranges are nothing more than stage performers who jump at my command! Petty thieves have no place in my circus!

I’ll make sure to have you jump through fates worse than rings of fire!”

—

Just as Chiaki had said, when they returned to the Treasure Room, the treasure had manifested. Instead of the indiscernible blurred blob, an extravagant top hat floats before them. Even at a glance, the material woven with is of high quality and the buttons glimmer with a shine similar to polished gems. Truly for a hat, it could be hailed as a treasure.

“A fancy top hat, huh. I was kind of expecting a whip honestly,” Ace comments as he admires it from afar, almost mesmerized.

“I guess you would think that. But it’s actually the top hat that’s the true status symbol, I think,” Bonnie adds on, just one of those trivias she picked up from videogames.

“The top hat is prettier too!” Monomi practically coos from the side.

“Well it doesn’t matter. Either way, we’re stealing it.” What’s important is that they’re taking this treasure with them regardless of their preferences. He tentatively reaches out for it—

Only to be pushed away by Bonnie.

“Ace, watch out!” She shouts and tackles him just in time before flames errupt from where he once stood.

“What the hell?” He coughs, accidentally having inhaled smoke. Suddenly the room felt all too hot.

Just as soon as the flames burst, they die out in an instant— along with the room’s lights. Suddenly, darkness swallows them.

“Did you really think it would be that easy?” The voice of Shadow Chisa creeps upon them. In the darkness, she could have well speaking through a megaphone beside them. “Do you think the way I treat my performers is cruel?” She chuckles eeriely and her hollow laughter echoes in the dark. “Well then let me show you how I treat thieves!”

With a snap of her fingers, the spotlights are on again.

Gone was the backstage room they were in. Now they were out in the performer’s ring, surrounded by bleachers filled with a crowd seemingly materialized out of nowhere. Shadow Chisa flicks her wrist and her whip cracks. The sharp sound summons a savage shadow that could pass off as a monstrous tiger. She sits on it as if it was her throne. It was a dangerous sight to behold. That was the least of their concerns at the moment. After all, the treasure was now beyond reach, and on top of Shadow Chisa’s head.

“My top hat is not some pretty thing to be simply stolen. It is a right to be earned. An honor that I earned,” She boasts high and mighty from her perch, looking down on them. “Only those who can perform the best shows have the right to wear this!”

She cracks her whip numerous times, each time a shadow comes forth.

“Watch and learn just how inexperienced you truly are without my guidance!”

Naturally they wouldn’t be able to take the treasure without a fight. This much they expected. They even managed to sweep off the first batch of shadows in just a few turns. But every time they defeat a shadow, Shadow Chisa simply cracks her whip and summons another, sometimes even more. They knew that in order to win this, they had to attack Shadow Chisa but she remains beyond the shield of shadows and out of reach. But that’s not even all of her tricks.

“Ugh!” Bonnie grits her teeth when a critical hit lands on her. She’s down on her knees, gasping.

The crowd roars. It isn’t just for show either since the enemies get buffs while the two of them get debuffs.

“Sorry… they got me off guard,” She slurs, already feeling her speed lowered.

“It happens. Just take care,” He answers curtly.

This isn’t working out. At this pace, they’ll end up exhausted and out of items before long. They have to change strategy, maybe aim elsewhere. Ace tries a different tactic and pulls out his dual pistols.

He fires at Shadow Chisa but she dodges with a flamboyant flip, mocking him. “Dammit!”

The crowd’s roar is even louder this time. The effects are instantaneous, perhaps even stronger.

“What the hell? Isn’t this a little unfair?!” He shouts in frustration as he feels his attack power leeched from him. He can barely hold his weapon with what little strength left in him.

“What did you expect when battling in this ring? We are all performers here. It’s our job to please the crowd, is it not?” Shadow Chisa taunts them with a malicious grin.

“Just give us the freaking hat already!” He barks at her as he narrowly dodges a shadow’s swipe. It’s sloppy and he knows that he can barely dodge another. These debuffs were hurting them more than the actual attacks.

“Wait, Ace. Maybe we’ve been doing this wrong,” Bonnie suddenly brings up when they were cornered.

“What? Did you figure something out?” He shoots her a desperate yet hopeful look.

She doesn’t disappoint. “It’s just as she said. Even though we are fighting, we’re also in the middle of a performance.” She gestures towards the crowd surrounding them. “Don’t you think we should show off our showmanship a bit more?”

…Show off?

Something clicked in the back of his head. That makes sense. That could actually work. That could turn the tables for them. “Oh… I think I get it now.” He nods at her, placing his full trust to her idea. “Alright, Bonnie. Show them how it’s done.”

“Blast off, Galaga!” She summons her persona but rather than using it to attack, she uses it in an improvised routine.

Bonnie latches on it and lets it take her to the highest point where she stays there for one dramatic moment longer. She lets go and falls head first. Her arms are crossed over her chest and her face is as peaceful as ever with her eyes closed. The crowd gasps at her bold move. She plummets fast towards the ground. Even Ace has to hold his breath. Just when there’s only several feet left, her eyes open. She flips herself upright and Galaga swoops in from beneath. She lands tall and proud.

The crowd goes wild. It has never been this loud and this time they were cheering for them.

“Alright! It looks like now’s our chance!” Ace triumphantly shouts, he feels stronger than ever.

From there, they regain their momentum. Aside from sending out Bonnie to do tricks, Ace found out that pulling off flashy moves or dodges had that same effect. For most part of the battle, they were the ones buffed rather than the shadows. It didn’t take long until Shadow Chisa finally ran out of shadow performers to summon.

“Enough!” Shadow Chisa growls at them. “You think that those cheap tricks are enough to best me? Truly the folly of amateurs. I’ll show you just how entertaining a performance should be!”

With another snap of her fingers, the spotlights converge towards Shadow Chisa, the light so intense that she could not be seen. From the blinding light, she bursts through transformed. Dark skin seething with fire, pointed horns portruding her head, and three pairs of arms each holding a flaming whip.

The crowd’s cheers are deafening.

“See? This is how you excite the crowd!” She gloats at them and the crowd goes ballistic. She looks down on them from her high perch and challenges them, “Now let me see how you top this!”

Her attacks were brutal. Six hands meant six attacks per turn and then there was that special tiger move. There’s also that annoying fact that she can do a trick before every turn of hers so all of her attacks are strengthened. But with Chiaki’s performance, they managed to get by somehow. She keeps coming up with impromptu routines that steal the show. Literally stealing the whips certainly helped, that was Ace’s favorite trick of hers.

All of them were exhausted at this point however against all odds, they were winning.

And it pissed off Shadow Chisa.

“You insolent brats. How dare you ruin my performance!”

“Give it up! You’re already out of tricks!” Ace jeers.

“The crowd loves us more so this is our win!” Bonnie shouts and as if on cue, the cognitive crowd cheers.

Shadow Chisa is not taking any of this.

“What kind of a ringmistress do you think I am? Of course I always save the best for last!” She barks, unwilling to accept defeat. She narrows her eyes at them. “Your last that is.”

They did not like the foreboding feeling that sentence held.

“Didn’t I tell you before that I’d make you jump through fates worse than rings of fire?” Six hands snap consecutively. Six large rings of fire encircle the two thieves from top to bottom. There’s no room for them to escape. “I like to call this one, Orange Flambete.”

She extends all of her arms and then swiftly brings them towards three pairs of claps.

Time slowed down at that point. Ace realized with all too much certainty what was happening. As her hands were getting closer and closer to contact, so were the flaming rings growing smaller and smaller around them. At some point they will undoubtedly get trapped and burned alive. No reflex or persona could save them. He chances a final glance at Bonnie, he recognizes the dreadful realization on her face. The same inescapable realization that mirrored his.

They were going to die.

He didn’t want to die.

He didn’t want her to die.

He didn’t sign up for this just to die.

Dying like this… Dying like this is…

Boring.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!” He clutches his head which feels like it was just set on fire. The pain scorches along his skull and his screams burn scars along his throat. He panics when he thinks that the flames have already gotten to him. Everything burns. Everything hurts. Everything dies. He doesn’t want to die. Not like this. Not a boring death like this.

But Ace eventually dies.

And so Blackjack is born.

Whatever remnant of Ace was had combusted into dark flames and replaced with someone else. His short brown spiky hair was now long ebony locks. His suit was replaced with a trench coat, his bowtie with a cravat, and his gloves were now dipped in red. His mask held a long beak and large clear lenses cover his eyes that glow red through. It was eerie, how different he carried himself. There was something unsettling about every fiber of this being.

Whereas Ace seemed full of life, Blackjack felt like death incarnate.

With a flick of his wrist, the flames instantly die out and in the next moment, the rings instantaneously crumble into dust. He didn’t even need to summon a persona. It’s as if he has complete control over everything simply by existing. If the Reaper exists then surely this person was Death himself.

The room falls into a reverant hush, even the crowd is uncharacteristically silent.

“What just happened?” Shadow Chisa asks, shocked but mostly annoyed.

His head slowly turns towards her, his eyes glow menacingly. Red is the color of blood.

Do shadows bleed?

Shadow Chisa feels her blood leave her body. She instantly fears for her life.

She doesn’t even get the chance to put her fear into action. She doesn’t even see what’s coming. In one swift movement, Blackjack has disarmed her of her weapons and her arms bend at all the wrong angles. “AAARGH!” She crumples helplessly with barely enough life left.

He calmly walks toward her as she tries to crawl away.

“G-Get back! Go away!” She shouts at him. She tries to snap her fingers but even those were broken without her knowing. She doesn’t bleed, not externally at least. But she doesn’t need to see the blood to know that she is dying.

And she will be killed faster.

So she pours what little remains of her life into desperate panic. She tries, and squirms, and crawls harder, as harder as her broken body can go.

Unfortunately for her, she doesn’t go that much farther. At least not enough to get away from the encroaching death.

He doesn’t hasten his walk, he doesn’t need to. In just a few languid strides, he reaches her. He stomps a foot on her chest, halting her movements. It weighs heavily on her like judgement. His heel digs into her, as if digging for a grave, her grave. Two guns are aimed at her head, loaded and ready to fire.

Two bullets, one for the kill and another for pity in case she survives the first one.

His expression is unshifting, unreadable, unfeeling.

He has yet to even say a single word.

It all happened so quickly that it had Bonnie reeling. She feels as if she was just watching some show, not really something happening in front of her. It was all too surreal. But the sight of Shadow Chisa on her dying breath snaps her right out of her reverie. Hajime or whoever that person is— is about to kill Shadow Chisa.

They came here to steal the treasure, not to kill the palace ruler.

She recovers on her feet and rushes towrds them. She thinks she sees him from her peripheral vision, curiously watching her every movement. But even so, he does not stop her. Not even when she was rushing in with desperate hurried steps. Not even when she abruptly pushes the guns away with trembling hands. Not even when she looked at him with a dead set determination.

He does not stop her. Instead he simply observes.

“That’s enough,” She starts off sternly. She may be out of breath but her resolve barely wavers. His face is still impassive but hers softens. As much as she wants to stop him, she also wants to show her gratitude. And so despite the situation, she smiles warmly. "Thank you for saving me… us.”

“…” He observes.

“But I think we can handle it from here.“ She stands her ground even as he quietly regards her. There is no movement from him, not even the slightest twitch of fingers on the triggers. She holds her breath, her eyes never leaving his.

He is done observing.

”…“ There is the faintest flicker in his eyes or maybe that’s just the glint from the lenses. When he speaks, his voice is as empty as his eyes. "Hmph. How boring…”

She wanted to ask him what he meant by that. Boring? What exactly did he find boring? And who was he in the first place? How is he related to Hajime? What happened to Hajime? How did he even appear? And why… why do his eyes look so empty? These were only a few of the questions she had wanted to ask. She wanted to ask him but she never did get the chance.

Dark flames errupt from nowhere and consume him whole.

When the flames die, so does Blackjack.

And so Ace comes back.

He clutches his head which strangely felt like it had just been set on fire. He couldn’t tell if it was a migraine or a hangover or both. Probably both. Or maybe just something worse. Just what the hell hit him? Hot white flashes of pain scorch along his skull as he groans weakly, “Ugh, I can’t… Did I get a critical hit to the head or something?”

“I’ll explain later,” She calmly reassures him. “For now, let’s deal with this first.”

Shadow Chisa is already on her knees, face towards the floor, and begging. “I didn’t mean for it to get this far. I just wanted what’s best for my students. But somewhere along the way, I forgot what’s important.” Her body shakes as she cries. It’s hard to imagine that this was the same shadow that was hellbent on killing them before. But it’s easy to remember the sincerity their teacher used to show. “Please forgive me. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

“I think there are others who deserve to hear that apology more than us,” Bonnie says as she gently pats her by the shoulders.

“Yeah, so long as you reflect on what you’ve done, there’s always hope for you.” Ace snatches the top hat from her, she doesn’t even fight for it.

With the treasure gone, the palace crumbles and so does her despairing desires.

“We’ll see your change of heart on the other side.”

That wasn’t the only thing they saw on the other side.

“What the?”

“What is it, Hajime?”

“Remember what Miss Yukizome’s treasure was?”

“A top hat… right?”

“Yeah, well about that…” He sucks in a breath, readying himself for delivering the news. “I can’t seem to find it.”

She tilts her head. “Did we drop it on our way out?”

“No, I’m pretty sure it was in here all the time and the zipper was closed so there was no way I could have dropped it.” He goes through the loot bag again but grumbles when he still can’t find it.

“Maybe I should look at it instead?” She offers.

“Okay. But be careful—”

She unceremoniously pours out the contents.

He sighs, tired. “Nevermind. Just go do your thing.”

She sifts through the various valuables they collected and makes a note of each one in her mind. Nothing else seems to be out of place, all the other loot is still here. Except for the top hat. But there was something there that wasn’t there before. ��Huh? What’s this doing here?”

She holds up the strangely misplaced item.

“Hey, isn’t that your class picture?” Hajime comments as he looks over her shoulder.

“Yeah, it is,” She confirms with a fond expression.

“I wonder, how did that get in there?”

“Maybe this was the treasure all along…” She whispers.

“Huh?”

“I think that Miss Yukizome, in her own way, was just trying to protect everyone.” She examines the photo closely and takes note of its pristine condition, as if it had been conscientiously cared for. This only confirms her suspicions. “After all, this was her treasure, right? Her intention was good but somewhere along the way, her methods turned bad.”

“I guess so. I mean she’s a kind person at heart.” He almost winces at his choice of words considering she also possessed a despairing heart. But they both knew what he meant. Their teacher was truly a kind and caring person. “That’s why it was so shocking at how despairing her desires were. It didn’t feel right. Especially not with her.”

“I get the same feeling too. Her methods were too extreme. And it’s not like her to think such dark thoughts.” She places the photo down as she contemplates further. “What if… What if someone else had implanted them?”

He raises an eyebrow at the idea. “You think so?”

“I’m not sure… It’s just a theory,” She falters.

“It’s… plausible I guess.” He nods as he develops it further. “I mean if we could go into the cognitive world and change hearts then who’s to say that there isn’t someone else out there distorting other people’s hearts?”

“It’s certainly better to think that Miss Yukizome’s actions were caused by someone else but…” She hesitates a bit for she concludes, “That would imply that there is someone else out there.”

“And that person is still out there,” He finishes.

It’s not a happy theory.

But it’s something that they can’t look away from.

“If there is such a person then I want to find them,” Chiaki announces with a face set with determination. “We can’t just let them wreak havoc. All they’re doing is spreading suffering. We have to stop them.”

“I agree. Besides, who knows who else they might have changed hearts? Depending on the person, we could be facing a crisis if we don’t do anything about this,” Hajime seconds her conviction. “We have to make sure. Once we know, we will find them. And we will steal their despairing heart as well.”

They may have stolen the despairing heart of their teacher but this was just the first of the many heists of The Dangan Thieves of Hope.

#dangan thieves AU #chisa yukizome #chiaki nanami #hajime hinata #dangan ronpa #danganronpa #izuru kamukura #hinanami #sdr2 #dr3 #dr3 despair #gotta love those two tumblr pips #I honestly do

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swingbeard · 7 years ago

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Matt’s Top 7 Games of 2017

2017 was a weird year.

At times, it was hard to focus on games.

On a global scale, we found ourselves often transfixed on news both positive and negative; in my opinion, it was often more of the latter. Games became an afterthought in a lot of ways.

But at times, it was easy to focus on games.

They provided a sanctuary, a place to take a breather and relax, to joke and laugh and have fun with friends or on my own. Even at times when the subject matter of some games took on relevance to real world issues, it was still fascinating and an escape in a way but a thoughtful one.

With this all in mind, I still wanted to take some time to celebrate some games I very much enjoyed (and others I’m just starting to get into and very much enjoy) in 2017.

Originally… this was going to be a much longer and more involved thing.

Instead, I’m going with something a bit shorter and more succinct so here’s seven games I really enjoyed this year, one of which has taken up a spot as my favorite game of the year. Thanks for reading and following along this year!

ABSOLVER (Sloclap)

As someone who doesn’t exactly enjoy playing fighting games, Absolver would seem a bit of an anomaly, right? You’re correct!

When it was presented at E3 a few years ago, I actually saw it as a Dark Souls-esque RPG with martial arts combat and lore instituted in place of sword-and-board action. I was so into the world, into what they were trying to build, into the ideas of gameplay (stances and switching between them, the moves themselves).

To a degree, this game is that… but the true endgame? What really drives the game once you’ve defeated the campaign? It’s the PvP, the actual “fighting game” part, and it’s something I’ve very much enjoyed - I never thought those words would leave my mouth.

Ever.

For someone like me, Absolver has proven to be a perfect introduction into that world; into fighting the same people online over and over to learn their movesets, to practice timing and get that down, to get frustrated but also understand why I’m getting beat and getting better.

The year is 2017 and I now enjoy playing an honest-to-god fighting game. What has happened to me?

FINAL FANTASY XIV: STORMBLOOD (Square Enix)

2017 was the year I truly got into Final Fantasy XIV.

I had struggled in the past, but the quality-of-life improvements plus finding two jobs/classes (Samurai and Monk) that I really liked propelled me into the main story of the core game, the Heavensward expansion, and the recently released Stormblood which brings you - the Warrior of Light - to far-off places like Gyr Abania, Othard, and the Ruby Sea.

I’m someone who’s never really been into the series in general, but the story and characters of FFXIV has grabbed me in an unexpected way and brought me along for a pretty wild ride at times. What World of Warcraft lacks in terms of consistency in its lore and sometimes not going far enough with its visuals? That’s what this game makes up for me.

I’m glad I finally got into this game and am looking forward to whatever patches and stories Yoshi-P and team have next for us.

* A shoutout goes to the people in my free company too, some of whom I like to think are pretty dang good friends now.

DOOM (id Software)

A game from 2016 on 2017’s list?

You’re correct, but this game is just that good and there’s a good reason for why it shows up on this list.

I actually purchased this game last year, but was never able to play it due to technical limitations. When I purchased a new PC in early September, this was one of the first games I installed.

And holy shit, all of the hype? All of the coverage I read? DOOM delivers on that, and more. It understands what it is, reverential in a way to the first games in this series… but also fresh, fun, and thrilling with modern twists and turns. While short, the campaign is worth the price of admission and I hope we get to see more of this story in a proper sequel after a good cliffhanger ending.

All in all, this game is a hell of a thing.

Literally.

WOLFENSTEIN II: THE NEW COLOSSUS (MachineGames)

I’m only a couple of hours into this game, and there’s already been a few moments where I’ve had to just sit back and let out a loud “What the fuck?” at what I’m seeing on the screen. It’s enough to put it on this list. Really.

As someone who never played The New Order but is generally aware of what happened, Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus appears to be something that stays true to the themes and roots of what that game set… and then expands that beyond those boundaries and confines to a degree that at times feels unsettling and uncomfortable in a way which reflects the fears of many in modern times.

It’s a game that is both an escape and a reality check in a way.

Even in a game with such great characters and shows reverence for them (but also will pull the trigger at any time), the compelling performance and depth Brian Bloom gives as B.J. Blazkowicz is absolutely incredible. The little things he says as you traverse levels, the flashbacks to a brutal past; the catharsis you seem him go through in often spectacularly bloody and violent fashion? It’s incredible to watch, mesmerizing almost.

Sure, the gameplay isn’t exactly what a lot of folks love… but at the same time, it almost doesn’t matter.

The New Colossus succeeds because the themes and message are heard loud and clear.

DESTINY 2 (Bungie)

I’ve seen a lot of negativity aimed toward Bungie lately.

And I think it’s understandable.

They’ve messed up a lot on a variety of fronts, including the most important - communication and transparency - and at times? It seems like Destiny 2 may be an unsalvageable situation, a repeat of the mistakes the company with the first game.

But a lot of the time? I have a great time with this game still and have spent hours exploring, raiding, or just chaining Strikes over and over with an occasional foray into the Crucible. I still appreciate the lore of Destiny to a ridiculous degree, to how the idea of “post-apocalyptic space fantasy opera” is explored. As frustrating as it can be sometimes, when Bungie does their lore right? It’s some of the best worldbuilding and storytelling I’ve ever seen.

I hope that Bungie can iron out the issues, because this game has the makings of a great foundation with which to build upon. Only time can tell if they can pull that off.

SUPER MARIO ODYSSEY (Nintendo)

Remember the crazy trailer for this game at E3?

I don’t think we actually thought this would deliver, right? Maybe?

Who knows?

What matters is that Nintendo delivered on that crazy gameplay reveal and gave us Super Mario Odyssey, which at its heart is the Mario everyone wanted all along with a few twists and turns that make it a fresh experience. Incorporating the “Capture” mechanic to the way this game does is tremendous and getting to utilize Cappy himself as a tool for exploration allows for you to fully explore the beautiful and vibrant worlds of this game.

Plus there’s the 2D sidescrolling element, and the photo mode, and the post-game stuff which-

You get my point. There’s so much here.

The thing I want to give Odyssey the most credit for? It’s just a happy game. It’s about making exploration fun, it’s about having a damn good time, and it delivers on those in every single way possible. In any other year, it might be my favorite game of the year but…

THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: BREATH OF THE WILD (Nintendo)

If you know me, this is no surprise.

I’ve been thinking on how to best write this since early March.

For Nintendo to basically blow up the standards of what a Zelda game is? To bring back the roots of what made games like the original the thing that caught fans’ attention and kept them hanging on for thirty-plus years? It’s a hell of a thing to do, but I feel as though they stuck the landing and with aplomb.

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild is an incredible thing; an open-world action-adventure game which takes so many elements plucked from so many other genres and then blends them all together in something that never fails to awe or amaze. It’s something I wanted for them to do for so long, to shake up the franchise and do something different.

Does it have some flaws here and there? Absolutely. It’s not a perfect game daresay, but damn it’s… an experience, it’s something I’ve told almost all of my friends who likes games to go play. Those dungeons you loved to explore or those items you so loved from past titles? They’re not here, but for good reason.

Why?

Because Breath of the Wild’s true challenge is exploration in this vibrant and amazing world of Hyrule. It’s conquering that highest mountain top or finding that shrine in a den full of dangerous enemies; maybe it’s hunting Lynels all day or trying to find all 900 Korok seeds.

In a year where I feel like I needed an escape at times? This game provided just that.

Hell, I’ve put 400+ hours into this thing and I can see myself putting in more.

What surprises me most about this game is the emotional impact I felt. In previous games, the same plot is often followed; many of the tropes and story beats in Zelda games are often circular. While this story is sparse in some places, the delivery of it is interesting enough that it makes me more interested in the canon of this universe than I have been since Wind Waker. I want to know what’s next for this incarnation of Link and Zelda in this world Nintendo has so elaborately constructed.

All in all, I wouldn’t call Breath of the Wild just my favorite game of 2017.

It’s without a doubt one of my favorite games ever, a classic that propels this franchise into the future and for the better by drawing upon its “you can do anything anywhere at anytime” beginnings.

#matt plays video games #sometimes i write things

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