#i have never been happy with a candidate i've voted for even those who have made it to office

[confinesofmy]

how you gonna vote your way out of something you didn't even vote your way into...

[qqueenofhades]

I think the Aaron Sorkin fic people are writing about the convention to be extremely silly. It's going to be Biden. And if Biden's health takes a downturn and he feels the need to step down its going tk be Harris. This fantasy where we skip over her to whip up two random white guys(or like maaaybe Witmer) and somehow cruise to victory instead of fragmenting the party months before the election is simply not going to happen.

Look, I'm just saying, I got an email from the Biden campaign this morning where they seemed pretty darn happy with the actual (i.e. not-bloviating media) results of the debate: $38 million raised in 4 days ($30 million from individual small-dollar donors), 10K new volunteers in a week, 3x surge in campaign volunteers for battleground states, essentially no change or even a modest boost in the polls. So I think at this point, we can cautiously conclude the following things:

The debate looked bad for Biden, perhaps, but doesn't seem to have hurt him nearly as much the incredibly bad-faith BIDEN NEEDS TO STEP DOWN NOW takes being pumped out by the NYT and its other compatriots would suggest. Especially when these same media outlets have been gleefully sabotaging Biden at every turn for years already and whose fake-sanctimonious hand-wringing "for the good of the nation" pieces honestly should get them dropped into Superhell for Bad Journalists;

Biden went to Raleigh NC right after the debate and gave a fiery rally speech that was very well received. Now, I don't know why we didn't have that Biden at the debate, but it was the same night and there clearly was not any "cOgnItiVe dEcLinE" happening there (also Biden has a stutter and has for literally his entire life, and had a cold on debate night, so it was just an unfortunate confluence of factors)

There are very few actually undecided voters in this election (once again: HOW???) and those who tuned into the debate were largely already convinced of which candidate they were voting for and this didn't do much to change their minds. Just like, you know, pretty much every other debate in the history of presidential elections.

Ordinary voters, and not mainstream media outlets with BIDEN IZ BAD goggles clamped over their eyes, were able to see Trump's insane Gish gallops, lies, and full-blown dementia; this isn't going to get any better for him when he's already lost 20%-25% of GOP voters in every state primary and still is going to be sentenced in his criminal trial;

The D.C. political elite screaming about how Biden should step down (FOUR MONTHS BEFORE THE ELECTION) and leave the Democrats to start from scratch with some Star Chamber-selected candidate with no money and no incumbency record and no organization apparatus and a divided party are either fucking weapons grade morons or working secretly for Trump, because that IS in fact the best way to lose the election;

Such speculation seems to fall chiefly on Gavin Newsom, who (to his credit) has shut down any and all suggestion that he should try to step in and take the place of an incumbent who has won every state primary with 90% or more, because he's remotely sane and understands that this year is too important to fuck around with;

I've somehow never seen any suggestion that Biden should step aside for the duly elected (brown, female) Vice President, because everyone seems to think some Young Miraculous White Guy is coming and/or should step in;

All this while SCOTUS is clearly so confident of Trump getting back in that it's willing to grant him Absolute God King status pre- and post-emptively;

Yes, Biden needs to up his game before the next debate (though that's on Fox News iirc, blargh), but I think it's far enough post-debate that we can say it was bad but did not sink him, and if anything, reinforced the fact to many ordinary, non-brainwormed voters that Biden is old (which has been the number one chief theme of news coverage for four years and is no surprise to anyone) but is a decent and principled man doing a good job, while Trump is an absolute gibbering insane orange shitmonger fascist. I don't think he did himself any favors in that regard.

....anyway. The point is, do not be fucking insane people, Biden is not going to step down and frankly shouldn't, don't read the NYT (as noted, they've openly admitted to sabotaging him for personal ego reasons so I don't know why the hell anyone would listen to what they have to say about him), this is still an eminently winnable election, and let's go get those motherfucking fascists. I want Trump in jail and all of SCOTUS and the MAGAGOP fucking crying over it because they fucking suck. Let's go.

[skys-archive]

To me, a very heartbreaking aspect of this election (at least as someone who lives in the deep south) is finding out the sheer number of people who I thought loved me and cared for my safety are happy at the outcome. People I tried to tell about this and what would happen.

My own mother didn't like either candidate from the beginning. I tried to tell her about project 2025 to sway her opinion. She told me those could never pass. She said she couldn't vote for Kamala because she's "basically Biden" to her. She voted for Trump because she thinks he's a smart businessman, and she said she likes Vance.

My own mother, who does genuinely love and care for me and who I have a lovely relationship with, voted for someone who actively wants me dead. For someone who wants her to remain in an abusive relationship she left years ago. Because "they won't pass".

My close friends who know my identity and who I am and I thought respected me for who I am are ecstatic at the results. People I didn't know the political beliefs of are coming out and letting me know they side with someone who wants my death, who wants the erasure of my people.

And honestly, maybe they will have it.

My ex, when I came to him originally about how scared I was of project 2025, thought I was getting upset over nothing. The man who I loved more than anything in this world believed that I was overreacting, that it would all be fine, that it didn't matter. He wasn't there when I was terrified. I almost wish I could look him in the face several months from now and he could see how real my fears are.

Other people like me, other people who are scared like me, are trying to just ignore it. A woman who I don't know too well came up to a group of friends I was with today and went to a couple, a man with his nonbinary partner. She said not to worry, that it was unconstitutional and it wouldn't happen.

This same group of friends discussed it, but it wasn't about fear or what to do now.

I met a friend today, at our usual spot. I was waiting for them, sitting with my head down on the table. I'd only found out a few minutes before. They said my name several times before I looked up. They asked if I wanted a forehead kiss and then led me to the rest of our friends. They said they were scared their father would be deported.

A different friend is probably going to leave their boyfriend. Not necessarily because of him, but definitely due to his friends. They say awful things about people like us every day, and there's certainly a reason their boyfriend hangs out with them.

I sat next to a friend and made fun of a tiktok I saw about Trump, it turned into a velocity edit about halfway through, I thought it was silly. She laughed with me but then said she was "so glad" he won, and doesn't understand why so many of her friends are "in such a mood". Many of her friends are queer.

My black friend is posting videos, jokes about having her rights taken away. I know it's how she's coping. I feel for her, and I understand, but I know I also could never know exactly how she feels.

I'm surrounded by people celebrating, people who I thought wanted me safe. Do they simply not know? Or do they want my death, too? Can they not see how terrified I am, how silent I am now?

I don't know if I should stay out. I hate the idea of using my deadname, of hearing my close friends calling me "she". But that would be safer.

Do I want to be safer? I don't think so. I don't want to die resigned. I don't want to hate myself even more. I want to be who I've been my whole life. Out, proud, safety and inspiration to the younger queer people who are scared. I want to be positive for them so they know that people like them can be happy. But I want to warn them as well, that being like this is dangerous, and hard.

I want disabled people who are scared to get aids, scared to get diagnosed, to look at me and know that there is at least some hope.

My mind is prone to overthinking, to finding the worst possible outcome of every situation. So I wonder if all of the things I come up with won't happen, and for a moment I find comfort in that. But I see others fear. I see how terrified they are of the same outcomes that I am, i see that I'm not the only one seeing them.

And I think, Why?

What am I meant to do now?

[rainbowsky]

'Happy' International Day Against Homophobia, Transphobia and Biphobia

Apologies, but this is going to be angry and political.

The fight is far from over, my friends! Things continue to suck badly in most parts of the world, even here in Canada! We're seeing more and more bigots coming out of the woodwork, and attempts to roll back and even eliminate LGBTQ rights.

There are major elections coming up in some countries. PLEASE GET OUT THE VOTE. If your election is a ways off, don't rest! Start organizing now, because make no mistake about it - the bigots are already working hard!

Don't think you're clever by abstaining or spoiling your ballot!! As people have been saying, "A vote isn't a love letter, it's a chess move." If you look at voting as a means of 'getting the person you want into power' you're fucked. There will almost never be a viable candidate who you actually like.

Instead we need to think of our votes as a means of PREVENTING the worst candidates from getting into power. In Canada, that's that utter dirtbag Pollievre. In the US, it's obviously Trump!! I don't care how much you hate Trudeau, I don't care how much you hate Biden! Yeah, I know they've done shitty things! I want to punch them both in the face!

However, they're both Mary Poppins when compared with their opponents!!!!!! Use your head! We have to make sure those lunatics don't get into power!

Think Pollievre won't roll back LGBTQ rights? Think he won't go after abortion? Think again!! Think Trump won't do the same? Get out from that rock you're living under!

Look at the right wing nutbars they're heavily supported by and understand that they're supporting these candidates for a reason!!

Decisions have consequences!!! There's no greater evil than apathy! Take responsibility for your values and make shit happen, people!

Sorry for those not in North America, but I've barely got the spoons to follow the political events in my own region. If anyone wants to add details about how to best support queer rights in their region, please do.

[pacificwaternymph]

more fae au please momther...I have only this carrot as payment 🥕

Sure!

(Just quick heads up, I'm not mad or anything like that so don't beat yourself up about it, but I don't really like being referred to as "mom" or "mother" or anything along those lines... it makes me a little uncomfortable. I'm happy to be an older sister or a cousin or even an aunt though! Again, don't work yourself up over this, I've never specified this anywhere so I'm really not upset)

I've been thinking about how to consolidate Shrubs backstory as a farmer's daughter into this au, so I've come up with a solution:

Each of the courts have their own system of choosing a ruler on the occasion where a monarch dies. The winter court has the standard hereditary "first born of the previous ruler gets the throne." The only way the family in power changes is through overthrowing the previous ruling family and instating a new one.

In the summer court, the current ruler hand selects an heir, and it can be anyone, no matter of status. They then pass on all of their knowledge to their chosen heir. Most monarchs choose their own children, but if the monarch has no children or deems their children unworthy of the throne, they may choose someone else. This is how Shrub became queen.

The Autumn court, the rulers are elected by the people. You do not run for the position of monarch, the people simply nominate those they think would make for good rulers and vote and whoever is elected must become the next monarch regardless of whether or not they want it. Gem won the vote, but made Fwhip a king alongside her since she was not doing ANYTHING without her brother.

And spring, the magic of spring itself nominates several potential candidates and has them fight to the death in like a hunger games situation, only the arena is the entirety of the Spring court's territory. During this time, none of them can leave, and it goes until there is only one person standing, who is then irrevocably tied to the land. Katherine still has the severed heads of all her opponents in her basement, hanging as trophies.

[darkmaga-returns]

November 04, 2024

Presidential Election 2024

"Neither is qualified. Both deserve to lose."

Video: Prof. Jeffrey Sachs Q & A at Cambridge Union as published on Oct 30 2024

Starting at 48:06 min (automated transcript, slightly edited):

Sachs:

I will not vote for a candidate that doesn't meet the minimum threshold for being president of the United States and we have two candidates, lead candidates, that don't. And so I decided I'm not voting - period. Because I want a candidate that actually has some possibility of doing something.

Now maybe they will but not based on what they say every day.

It is a profession of love for Israel's murderous reign in the Middle East. Okay, by itself I wouldn't support that. That's enough for me because Israel is committing a genocide in Gaza and it's sickening and it's obvious and we see it every day. And if a candidate can't figure out to say something about then I can't support them. Period.

But then Kamala Harris, who would normally be my candidate because I was a lifelong Democratic Party voter. Although with great disappointment whether they won or lost. Because when they won I was disappointed with what they did. When they lost I was disappointed that my candidate lost. So I've never been happy for a while about us politics.

It's been five miserable presidents as far as I'm concerned from Clinton, Bush, Obama, Trump, Biden, awful all of them. They brought us to the brink of nuclear war. I can't forgive them for that kind of recklessness.

But when it comes to Ukraine Harris says we stand with Ukraine. Just everybody understand what does it mean to stand with Ukraine, like Boris Johnson stands with Ukraine. It means 2,000 Ukrainians killed or wounded severely every single day. That's not standing with Ukraine. That is standing with the destruction of Ukraine. It's exactly the opposite. And so that's a purely Orwellian idea that we're standing with Ukraine by continuing this war.

And that's what she says because she doesn't seem to have any idea other than what she's told to say or she says her ideas. And either way I can't vote for her.

And with Trump - don't even get me started.

So the answer is I don't see either of them based on what they're saying right now doing much.

But I think there's another point that is important in this. I'm not without hope for a quite different reason and that is that our politics is not determined by American presidents. Our politics is determined by the Security State apparatus. And what is happening right now is not in America's security interest and so they could change their mind.

President Putin said something actually very interesting in an interview in 2017, I think in Figaro. By the time he had three presidents as his counterparts, Bush, Obama and Trump, and he said to this French reporter in 2017.

He said: "You know I've dealt with three American presidents. Now they come into office with ideas but then men in dark suits and blue ties come to tell them how the real situation is and you never hear of those ideas again."

And this is from a very tough-minded leader who was himself KGB he understands how the American system works very well. He understands what the CIA means for American foreign policy. He understands that American foreign policy is very deeply rooted.

It's not this one wins then Obama changes everything and then Trump comes in and changes nothing like that. By the way this has been a consistent foreign policy arguably since 19 certainly since 1991 and arguably since 1945.

- end of Jeffrey Sachs quote

[leonbloder]

An Election Day Message

Today is Election Day, and I will do my best to eloquently discuss the importance of voting and civic engagement as both a privilege and a responsibility, especially for those who say they follow Jesus.  

Let's be clear: Jesus never said a thing about voting.  

He said many things that were considered political, however. Every time he talked about the Kingdom of God, he made what amounted to a political statement because he compared the kingdoms of this world to God's kingdom. 

But the Apostle Paul had a great deal to say about what it meant to be a citizen of the Kingdom of God and a citizen of whatever earthly kingdom was in power. 

For Paul, Christians needed to be the best citizens they could be.  He exhorted early Christians to be good neighbors, to obey the laws of Rome (as long as they did not violate the higher laws of love), and to do everything they could to live peaceably with everyone. 

Paul responded to a genuine issue that early Christians faced in the first century.  

Because they did not partake in the "cult of the Emperor," which demanded the Emperor be worshipped like a god and also had what were considered secretive rites and rituals (Holy Communion), early Christians were often persecuted, not by the Roman Empire, but by their neighbors. 

Paul's exhortations amounted to a call to a higher level of citizenship, as long as participation did not cause them to violate their beliefs and principles.  

He wrote that IF respect and honor were due to the earthly powers that be, Christians should afford them that.  The key word there was "if."  

Paul was all too aware that the Emperor of Rome at the time was a despotic, narcissistic, and undoubtedly insane ruler named Nero. Nero encouraged and demanded that he be worshipped like a god.  

History teaches that many Christians in the Roman Empire found ways to pray for the Emperor even if they were not willing to pray to the Emperor. They could participate in festivals with their neighbors without eating meat purchased from pagan temples. 

They acted with kindness and mercy to their neighbors, they cared for people during plagues at risk to their own lives, and they rescued baby girls who were left to die of exposure by their parents who didn't want them, among many other things.  

Sometimes, Christians even served in high-ranking positions within the Empire itself. 

I've said all that to say this: If early Christians had been given the right to vote (no one voted for leaders in the Roman Empire; they were all appointed), the Apostle Paul would have most certainly encouraged them to exercise that right and to do it as good citizens. 

I can only guess that Paul would have also encouraged them to use their vote to further the common good, vote for candidates of upright character, and do their best to vote their conscience, which ought to be grounded in the shalom or peace of God's kingdom.  

So, if you still need to vote, get out there today and make it happen.  The Apostle Paul would likely approve of it. 

I came across this quote from the late David Foster Wallace, who wrote about the importance of voting:  

“If you are bored and disgusted by politics and don't bother to vote, you are in effect voting for the entrenched Establishments of the two major parties, who please rest assured are not dumb, and who are keenly aware that it is in their interests to keep you disgusted and bored and cynical…"

We have seen this happen in our country for many years since Wallace wrote this.  He goes on to say: 

"In reality, there is no such thing as not voting: you either vote by voting, or you vote by staying home and tacitly doubling the value of some Diehard's vote.”

So, if you don't want to double the value of "some Diehard's vote," make sure you cast yours today.  

Happy Election Day!  

May it be decided by tonight or tomorrow at the latest and not be dragged on and on.  Can I get a witness?  

And may the grace and peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with us all, now and forever. Amen.  

[unicornbeck]

I wanted to send you a message as we head into 2024 to let you know how happy I am that we connected- first on AO3 and now here- because you have made a pretty crappy year infinitely better through your amazing, wonderful comments you left on DFAFM.

You were the first (but not last, haha) reader to call me brutal, and I think maybe you were the one who awarded me the title of Queen of the Cliffhangers too, I can't remember - but I feel SEEN as a writer when you comment. I feel as though, out of all the readers I have, you are the one who gets the depth of it all, the boundaries I am willing to push, the trauma it comes from... every time you comment I giggle and feel on a high for hours because I know what I'm writing is making a difference. And it means so much.

So, sorry, long winded, but thank you for being you, for making a really shitty year a bit better, for making me smile whilst in hospital, for giving me a reason to keep writing.

You are amazing and I am so glad to know you, and I hope 2024 brings so so many amazing things your way.

Phoenix Rose 🌹

I was so moved to read this message from you-- I love your work and I am always blown away by it. You take a lot of risks that other authors I read just aren't taking. And there's nothing wrong with that-- different authors have different strengths. But I really admire your risk-taking. Your willingness to put even main characters in serious mortal peril is nothing short of George RR Martin. It's very high-stakes, and I am there for it.

Even though I know it could well break my heart, at least in the short term.

I am not nearly so fearless in that regard, in my own writing. There're other things I write, other risks I take, but I could never have been brave enough to make Muriel Fall. Never could have killed off Nina or made Maggie one of the Nephilim. You have this way of seeking out those walls, those lines that are marked 'do not cross,' and you look your readers in the eye and step right on over. You make me want to cross my own fences, my own imaginary lines. Reading your story gives me the feeling of boundless freedom, the feeling that anything is possible. (And yes, there is a bit of trauma in that-- shedding protections is always scary, can be painful. But it's good, too. Freeing, as I said.)

I'm glad that you feel seen, are pleased with my comments; I have lots of big opinions about the fics I enjoy, and it would be very hard for me to shut up about them.

I hope that 2024 will be a kinder, gentler year for us all. From what little I know of your life, you could certainly use a break, and definitely deserve one. I live in the US, and it's an election year here for us. I will be avoiding most national news like the plague to preserve my own mental health and sanity. The truth is, I already know there will be nobody on the ballot as progressive and bleeding-heart liberal, tree-hugging feminist, LGBTQIA friendly as I am, but then, there never is. I'm always and forever voting for the candidates who will do the least harm to the greatest number of people. Sigh

I hope that your health challenges will be resolved in a healthy and favorable way, and that you will find lots of time to do lovely things with your family-- you said you have 2 kids, yes?

I've got 3 offspring-- Xander, age 22, Atticus, age 21, and Harper, age 19. The older 2 are boys, and Harper is non-binary. I think I remembered you saying you were happily single (sorry if I'm misremembering). I'm married to Kevin, who's a computer programmer geek. We have 4 cats because Kevin is relatively sane and has quashed my crazy-cat-lady instincts to a number we can afford to feed.

You thought you were "long-winded," but as you can see, I have a bottomless supply of chatty when writing to other writers. In RL I'm pretty introverted and a bit... strange? I guess. I just always have been. I'm supposedly neurotypical, but I think maybe they just didn't ask the right follow-up questions on the medically dubious online assessment I took a while back.

In any event, I've been working on a Good Omens AU of my own and doing a bit of beta reading for Foul F13nd on her very lovely fic, A Social Construct. She reads mine too. It's the best writing relationship I've had in almost a decade. The last writers' group I was a part of disbanded maybe 8? 10? years ago. I'm still friends with the members, but too many of us had life changes and went our separate ways, so a lot of those connections are internet-only now. The friendships that I've made with other people who write are some of the deepest and most-affecting connections in my life. There is something about the act of writing and workshopping and reading for each other that is so life-affirming, so viscerally constructive. It's such an absolute pleasure to write to you about your work. It makes me feel seen and connected and not alone.

Anyway. My name is Rebecca, I think I said. I'm not very good at tumblr and can't see the message I wrote you here... Have to work on that a bit. If you're comfortable with it, let me know if there's a name other than Phoenix Rose that you'd like me to call you. Otherwise, may I shorten it to Rose?

Happy New Year. Cheers!

[addictofsupernatural]

Emotions (pt. 5)

Billy Hargrove x reader

Summary: Billy and y/n go to prom together, but some people and things get in the way of the two.

Word Count: 2047

Chapter 1 • Series Masterlist • Chapter 6

"Guess where we're going."

You stared at the paper, frowning. "I've never been to one of these before. It's not on the list."

He flashed you a grin, pulling out your folded up bucket list from his pocket. At the bottom he scribbled the words prom together in marker. "Sure it is. What do you say?"

You stood, holding Billy's hand. He stood as well, and the two of you went to your room. You sat down on your bed and sighed. "That's a lot of people Billy. I don't know how I'll do with a big crowd."

He sat next to you. "What do you mean sweetheart?"

"Everybody's going to stare at me. It bothers me when it's a lot of people."

"Why do you think they'll stare at you? Is it because wearing a dress makes you a lot more cuter?" He teased.

You began to play with his hair while resting your head on his shoulder. "You attract a lot of attention, which isn't a bad thing. It's because you're so pretty, but people look at me funny when we're together. It makes me feel weird about myself."

Billy felt a pang of guilt and sorrow. Though you didn't realize it, you basically told him you feel insecure standing next to him. "Sweetheart, never be embarrassed about yourself. You're pretty damn gorgeous if you ask me, and it takes a pretty person to know a pretty person. So go find yourself a cute dress, and get ready for prom in two days. I'll be your date."

"I've never had a date before." You quietly said.

"Well, you got a pretty handsome first date. You must be special or something." He playfully nudged you.

You giggled. "Something like that."

Once he left, Mike walked into your room. "Hey, so, I know that I always talk crap about Billy Hargrove for being a man whore, but really. Be careful. Even though you're an ass most of the time, I still care about you."

You smiled. "Thanks Mike."

Joyce was more than happy to take you dress shopping, after she heard about the prom from Hopper complaining about it. You got a shoulderless, flowy dark blue dress and styled your hair the way Billy likes it.

There was a knock at the door, and Eleven answered to reveal Billy, in a black suit with a dark blue tie. Max was behind him, and shoved past him to get to El. Billy shook his head and huffed while walking inside, where Hopper looked him up and down. "Just, home by 10. Please. And no bad stuff." Billy smiled and nodded.

You walked out of your room, and Billy was blown away. Damn, you were just too sexy for your own good. You walked up to Billy, smiling as he gently grabbed your arm and put a blue corsage on your wrist. He took your hand and the two of you walked out of the house in silence. "So damn beautiful." Billy whispered into your ear before he opened the car door for you.

When he got inside, you immediately reached over to him and gave him a hug. "You're so perfect Billy."

He hugged you back. "Just trying to live up to you sweetheart." He paused. "Could you actually do me a favor?"

You pulled back and gave him a smile that cause him to unconsciously lick his lips. "Anything."

"Could you give me one of those little braids that you did when you were at my house?"

You giggled. "Sure Billy." He scooped you up into his lap, telling you to continue. You shook your head, smiling wider. "Such a charmer."

When you got there, the two girls in front handed you a ballet. "Vote for prom king and queen!"

You both looked at it. "Huh." Was all Billy said.

"Why are our names on it?" You asked.

"Guess people think we look cute together." Billy said, with his head on your shoulder. You looked back at him, and he looked up at you, grinning.

The two of you had fun together. You laughed, you danced, you took pictures. Though Billy didn't show it, this wasn't something he really wanted to do. He wanted to get you dressed up and make you feel special, but he didn't like how many eyes where on you two, or that the music was too loud to talk to each other. But he made you feel special, and you were a potential prom queen. He knew he would make you feel amazing, so it's worth it.

When they called for the king and queen candidates, it was no surprise to you that Billy would win. He looked back to you, giving you a smile and a shrug. You gave him a thumbs up in return, flashing him a grin. "And the winner for this year's Hawkins prom is... Heather Halloway!"

You smiled and clapped. Though you had to admit that it would feel like a fairy tale if you and Billy were king and queen together, you didn't really think you'd win. It's not like people like you, so why would they vote for you. But still, you were very happy for Billy to get his crown.

Billy's smile was wiped clean off when they announced Heather as the winner. She excitedly got her tiara and was immediately on Billy when they had to take a picture together. Right before the flash, she turned his head and gave him a kiss on the lips. He looked over to you, who was watching this happen and walked into the crowd, where he couldn't see you.

Shit. Shit shit shit! Why did you see that?! He didn't want the kiss. He didn't want her. He wanted you! Where were you now? You didn't leave, did you?Shit!

You walked over to the beverage table, where you saw Jonathan in an old light brown suit chaperoning. "Well, I didn't think I'd see you here." You said with a smile.

He looked up and smiled. "Yeah, right back at you. You look nice."

"Thanks. And you look very handsome in that suit." He let out a breath and looked down. "Need community service hours?"

He playfully scoffed. "Why else would I be here?" You giggled. "So, why are you here?"

"Oh, I'm here with Billy."

"Um, Billy Hargrove?" You smiled and nodded. "Isn't he, like, a lady's man or something?"

You smiled and shrugged. "We're actually just friends. Believe it or not he doesn't make moves like that on me. He's just playful with me, is all."

He nodded in response. "So, where is he now?"

"He was voted prom king, so right now he's dancing with his queen." Your smile became a little more forced.

"You like him, don't you?" There was no disgust or judgement in his voice like anyone else; only pure curiosity.

You put your finger to your lips with a smile. "Shh. I know someone shouldn't have a crush on their best friend, but sometimes you just can't help it."

"Yeah, I get that." He nodded, to which you made a face. He noticed. "Try to be nicer to Nancy. She's different from everyone else."

"If you say so." You shrugged. "I just don't like some of things she says and does." Jonathan rubbed the back of his neck. "Your mom was amazing, by the way. For taking me to pick out the dress."

"Yeah. Even though she's a little tomboyish, she really liked it. It's something that she can't really do with her sons, y'know?"

You let out a fake gasp and held his hand. "Don't talk about yourself like that! I'm sure she would love to go dress shopping with you, if that's what you want." The two of you laughed together.

As Billy went searching for you after the dance, he found you grabbing another guy's hand and laughing with him. Billy figured that he deserved that, considering he had another girl pressed up on him for almost 5 minutes. He crept up behind you and grabbed your arms. "Boo." He whispered in your ear.

You jumped, turning around and smiling so brightly. "Hey Billy. Congrats. Feeling like a king?"

"Feeling like I got the wrong queen." He said, taking your hand. "C'mon."

You looked at Jonathan. "Don't tell Nancy, please. I don't want to hear it." Jonathan only nodded.

Billy pulled you away, and another slow song started playing. You loosely put your arms on his shoulders when he grabbed your wrists and wrapped them tighter around his neck. Smiling, you watched him wink at you before putting his hands on your hips. "I didn't want her to kiss me, by the way. She just did."

You nodded lightly. "You don't have to explain yourself Billy."

"I know, but friends don't lie, right?" You chuckled and nodded. "Speaking of which, who was that?"

"Oh, Jonathan? He's the brother of one of El's friends. He's pretty nice, but he hangs around a girl that I don't like."

He hummed. "And here I thought you were kind and adorable to everybody."

"Mm. I'm only adorable to you. Anyways, she's got a boyfriend, Steve Harrington, and–"

"Ugh, King Steve," Billy interjected. "Don't see how he'd ever land any girl."

You laughed. "He's not that bad anymore. He's nice now. He treats me normally, so that's something." Billy made a tsk at that. "Anyways. She strings him along like a little puppy, even though it's obvious that she doesn't like him like that anymore. But she also leads Jonathan on and keeps him with her at all times. I just feel like she wants the best of both worlds, and that'll end up hurting both."

"What's so special about that girl? She got beer-flated nipples or something?" You both laughed.

"Excuse me." Heather said, grabbing your shoulder. "Can I cut in?"

"No." Billy said.

"Billy, you always play hard to get." She smiled. "Let's dance. Don't you want to dance with a real queen?"

Before Billy could say anything, you said, "How about after the song is over, hm?" She gave you a dirty look, but nodded and left. Billy looked at you miserably. So you did get the wrong impression. You pressed yourself against Billy and whispered in his ear. "Let's get out of here." He grinned. Or maybe you know him better than he thought?

The two of you then got fast food and brought it back to his house, considering Neil was on a business trip for a few days. You both sat on the floor and ate while watching TV and talking. You were sitting in between his legs and leaned on him. "I love this movie!" Was what you said before falling silent to watch Back to the Future.

Billy's mind began to wander to places they shouldn't. He thought about how your chest was snug in your dress, and how looking down at you gave him the perfect view. He thought of your soft hair that lay on your bare shoulders. He thought about your skin, looking so soft and calling for his touch. His mind wondered to how your head was tilted, almost like you wanted him to kiss your neck.

Billy cursed himself for thinking like that. You were friends, he shouldn't be thinking that way about you. What would you do if you found out about the ways he thought about you sometimes. What would you say? Would you still want to be friends? He unintentionally jumped a bit when you turned around. You gave him a bright smile. "Why are you staring at me?"

"You're just so damn perfect, my mind can't help but wander." He breathed out. He didn't think before he said that, but it was out now.

Your smile faded as your eyes flickered from his eyes to his lips. You then said in a quiet voice, "If you get romantic feelings towards your best friend, what do you do?"

Billy felt a surge of confidence as he took your face in his hands and went for a kiss. Billy has kissed lots of girls before, but it was never like this. It was never slow and sweet. It was never this kind of passionate. It was never as special as this.

He felt the warmness of your hands as they slid up his chest. As Billy pulled back, he saw you open your eyes and give him a beautiful smile. "I got a crush on my best friend too sweetheart." He said.

You wrapped your arms around his neck loosely. "So, what happens now?"

One arm snaked around your neck to hold you close to him. "Now I get to take you on romantic dates, and be around each other more, and make out and shit."

You giggled. "So it's how we are usually, but closer?"

He chuckled as he admired your happy glow. "Oh, pretty girl."

"Handsome boy."

"Your handsome boy."

"Your pretty girl."

---

Tag List:

@roxytheimmortal @shane-isa-shame @actuallyazriel @tanovic54321 @chipster-21 @jula-bear @ellie2468 @sassysmiles @frozenhuntress67

[michaeljacksoncaptaineo]

Today in History

On January 26, 1984, Michael Jackson's hair caught on fire while filming a Pepsi commercial.

UPI:

JAN. 28, 1984

Michael Jackson hospitalized after fireworks mishap on set of Pepsi commercial

ByJEFF HASEN

LOS ANGELES -- Superstar Michael Jackson, hospitalized with burns from fireworks that ignited his hair during filming of a commercial, was quietly discharged from a hospital Saturday against his doctor's recommendation.

Dr. Steve Hoefflin said he believed it was best for Jackson to stay at Brotman Memorial Hospital, but reluctantly agreed to his release at 12:30 p.m. PST (3:30 p.m. EST). Hours earlier, he had told reporters Jackson would be hospitalized 'for several days.'

'We recommended that Michael stay, but we determined this could be done as well out of the hospital as in the hospital,' Hoefflin said. 'Despite our recommendation, he felt he did want to be treated as an outpatient.

'He was quite happy. He felt better after a good night's sleep. He's in excellent health and was showing very rapid signs of recovery. He's very pleased it was not more of a severe burn.'

Hoefflin said he did not know where Jackson planned to go.

Jackson, 25, was dancing down a stairway at the Shrine Auditorium Friday night in a scene for a multi-million dollar Pepsi commercial when a special effects smoke bomb apparently misfired and set his pomade-slicked hair ablaze.

Nurse Pat Lavalas, the burn unit supervisor, said Jackson was in good spirits Saturday morning and he received many telephone calls, including get-well wishes from singers Teddy Pendergrass and Stephanie Mills.

'He left in good spirits and his condition is good,' she said. 'He didn't speak about the accident to us. He watched 'American Bandstand' this morning and people were getting his autograph.

He sang a Stephanie Mills song in the bathroom. He stayed in bed and opened telegrams, and he got a big kick out of one from a fan that said, 'I know you're hot, but this is ridiculous,'' the nurse said.

Just hours before Jackson's secretive departure, Hoefflin told reporters the singer was in satisfactory condition with second-degree burns and a small third-degree burn on the back of his head.

'He's in moderate pain, he's much more tired than we anticipated. He needs sleep at this time,' Hoefflin told reporters at a hospital news conference.

He said Jackson may require reconstructive surgery.

Jackson, the country's top singer, won seven American Music Awards earlier this month and picked up a record 12 Grammy nominations. Hoefflin said Jackson will be able to attend the Feb. 28 Grammy presentations at the Shrine 'if he feels up to it.'

A spokesman for Jackson said the singer requested that a tape of the accident be made public as soon as the film can be processed.

'Michael wants to make certain that his fans know exactly what happened,' Larry Larson told reporters at the hospital.

Asked if Jackson was contemplating a lawsuit, he said, 'There's no indication at this point.'

Hospital officials said the medical center had been inundated with thousands of phone calls since Jackson arrived and a spokesman pleaded with the public to stop calling, saying emergency calls could not get through.

The singer's 'Thriller' album topped the music charts last year, placing an unprecedented six singles -- including 'Billie Jean' and 'Beat It' -- in the top 10 and spawning several popular videos.

The accident Friday night occurred before a horrified audience of about 3,000 people who won tickets to the taping from a local radio station.

One witness told United Press International that Jackson removed his jacket without breaking stride and tried to put out the fire.

'There was supposed to be an explosion for his big entrance,' Daryoush Maze, 25, an extra in the cast, said. 'As he went off, an explosion went off and there was blue smoke all around his head and neck. There were no flames, just blue smoke from the stuff he had in his hair.

'It seemed like it was part of the show. He was doing it very professionally, still dancing. He's a good trouper.'

About a block from Jackson's boyhood home, nearly 1,000 people clad in their Sunday best jammed into a small, stuffy basketball gym to hear the candidate speak.

After a church choir sang a few hymns, Jackson's mother, wearing a deep blue dress and a 'Jackson in '84' button, triumphantly introduced her son to the throng.

Jackson took the stage and led the audience in his familiar 'I am somebody' chant.

'Our mission is justice at home and peace abroad,' he told the townspeople. 'I've watched the growth of this city and this state and I see the need for more growth.

'We have the need this day to have a spirit of redemption and reconciliation -- to rise above historic divisions that have stunted our growth. This is a period for us to beat our swords into plowshares.'

Jackson spoke of Greenville as once being the textile capital of the world, and noted the slump in the industry today that has put thousands out of work.

He called for an end to the 'dislocation of the textile industry.'

'This generation must realize when a plant closes, it closes without notice. Men cannot feed their families; mothers cannot nourish their children. That kind of reckless economic conduct must challenge us to open a new economic order.'

Jackson also visited a small bar that sponsors a softball team Jackson played on during the 1960s.

The presidential hopeful was the team's starting first baseman.

'He's a long-ball hitter,' said Charles Chiles, a patron of the establishment who remembers Jackson's days on the softball field.

Jackson also climbed onto the fender of a brown Cadillac parked near the bar during the afternoon and urged about 200 onlookers to register to vote.

'You can help me and you can help yourself,' he said. 'If we register to vote our children will not have to grow up as we did. They can get jobs. They can develop and grow.

'We can not only hang around on the corner, we can own the corner.'

Moonwalk book page 235-238:

Later one of the doctors told me that it was a miracle I was alive. One of the firemen had mentioned that in most cases your clothes catch on fire in which case the whole face can be disfigured or you can die. That’s it. I third-degree burns On the back of my head that’s Almost went through to my skull, so we had a lot of the problems with it, But I was very lucky.

What we now know is that the incident created a lot of publicity for the commercial. They sold more Pepsi than ever before. And they came back to me later and offered me the biggest commercial endorsement Fee in history. It was so unprecedented But it went into The Guinness Book of World Records. Pepsi and I worked together on another Commercial called” The Kid”, And I gave them problems by limiting the shots of me because I felt the shots they were asking for didn’t work well. Later, when the commercial was a success, he told me I had been right.

I still remember how scared those Pepsi excuses looked the night of the fire. They thought that my getting burned would leave a bad taste in the mouth every kid in America who drank Pepsi. They knew I could have sued him and I could have. But I was real nice about it. Real nice. They gave me $1,500,000 Which I immediately donated to the Michael Jackson Burn Center. I wanted to do something because I was so moved By the other burn patient I met while I was in the hospital.

“ I have a plan to spend most of 1984 working on some movie ideas we had, But those plans got sidetracked. First, in January, I Was burned On the set of a Pepsi commercial I was shooting with my brothers.

The reason for the fire stupidity, pure and simple. We were shooting tonight and I Wassupposed To come down a staircase yes magnesium flash bombs Going off on either side of me and just behind me. It seemed so simple. I wanted to walk down the stairs and these bombs Would blow up. We did several takes that were wonderfully timed. The lighting effects from the bombs were great. Only later did I find out that these bombs Were only two feet away from either side of my head, which was a total Disregard of the safety regulations. I was supposed to stand in the middle of a magnesium explosion, two feet on either side.

Then Bob Giraldi, the director, Came to me and said, “ Michael, you are going down too early. We want To see you up there, up on the stairs. When the lights come on, we want to reveal that you’re there, so wait”

So I waited, the bombs went off on either side of my head, and the sparks set My hair on fire. I was dancing down the ramp and turning around, spinning not knowing I was on fire. Suddenly I filled my hands reflexively going to my head In an attempt to smother the flames. Are you feeling down and just tried to shake the Flames out. Jermaine Turned around and saw me on the ground, Just after the explosions had gone off, and he thought I was shot be someone In the crowd — ‏because we were shooting In front of a big audience. That what I looked like to him.

Miko Brando , Who works for me, was the first person to reach me. After that, it was clhaos. It was crazy. No for me could probably capture The drama of what went on That night. The crowd was screaming. Someone shouted, “ Get some ice! “ There were fantic running sounds. People were yelling,” Oh no!”. The emergency truck came up And before they Put me in Isow the Pepsi excutives huddled together in a corner, looking terrified. I remember the medical people putting me on a cot And the guys from Pepsi were so scared They couldn’t

even bring themselves to check on me.

Meanwhile, I was kind of detached, despite the terrible pain, I was watching all the drama unfold. Later they told me, I was in shock, but I remember enjoying the ride to the hospital because I never thought I’d ride in an ambulance with the sirens wailing. It was one of those things I had always wanted to do when I was growing up. We got there, They told me there news crews Outside, so I asked for my glove. There’s a famous shot one waving from the stretcher with my glove on. hooting tonight and I Wassupposed To come down a staircase yes magnesium flash bombs Going off on either side of me and just behind me. It seemed so simple. I wanted to walk down the stairs and these bombs Would blow up. We did several takes that were wonderfully timed. The lighting effects from the bombs were great. Only later did I find out that these bombs Were only two feet away from either side of my head, which was a total Disregard of the safety regulations. I was supposed to stand in the middle of a magnesium explosion, two feet on either side.

Then Bob Giraldi, the director, Came to me and said, “ Michael, you are going down too early. We want To see you up there, up on the stairs. When the lights come on, we want to reveal that you’re there, so wait”

So I waited, the bombs went off on either side of my head, and the sparks set My hair on fire. I was dancing down the ramp and turning around, spinning not knowing I was on fire. Suddenly I filled my hands reflexively going to my head In an attempt to smother the flames. Are you feeling down and just tried to shake the Flames out. Jermaine Turned around and saw me on the ground, Just after the explosions had gone off, and he thought I was shot be someone In the crowd — ‏because we were shooting In front of a big audience. That what I looked like to him.

Miko Brando , Who works for me, was the first person to reach me. After that, it was clhaos. It was crazy. No for me could probably capture The drama of what went on That night. The crowd was screaming. Someone shouted, “ Get some ice! “ There were fantic running sounds. People were yelling,” Oh no!”. The emergency truck came up And before they Put me in Isow the Pepsi excutives huddled together in a corner, looking terrified. I remember the medical people putting me on a cot And the guys from Pepsi were so scared They couldn’t

even bring themselves to check on me.

Meanwhile, I was kind of detached, despite the terrible pain, I was watching all the drama unfold. Later they told me, I was in shock, but I remember enjoying the ride to the hospital because I never thought I’d ride in an ambulance with the sirens wailing. It was one of those things I had always wanted to do when I was growing up. We got there, They told me there news crews Outside, so I asked for my glove. There’s a famous shot one waving from the stretcher with my glove on.

https://youtu.be/DkMNn7TA0pg

[qqueenofhades]

as a woc (who is south asian, so i share that with harris), it's deeply upsetting to me that......nothing she could do would be right. i see people wondering why she isn't doing more, but then she does something, and then those same people pick that thing apart and tear her to pieces and it really does go to show that nothing we ever do will be "right".

i have yet to see criticism of her specifically that doesn't boil down to racism or misogyny (or a combination of both), and it's frustrating, especially in leftist spaces, because i do want to think critically and have conversations about what she's doing right and what she (and the administration as a whole) could improve upon, but i feel like i can't start or participate in those conversations without dealing with that same racism + misogyny. and this isn't even getting into the gop, this is about people who call themselves progressive/leftist/whatever. so much effort goes into maintaining the idea that they're better than the right, but i don't see nearly as much effort put into.....being better tbh

Unfortunately, among all their other problems, Online Leftists are a) often just as likely to be racist and misogynist as the GOP, and b) to strenuously deny that they are, weaponize that language in bad faith against people or candidates they dislike, and otherwise parrot abstract "social justice" talking points and Progressive Jargon while being absolutely noxious to the real, actual people that are involved. They do, as you say, assume they are Morally Righteous, and then don't actually interrogate that or question it in any way. So.... yeah. Yeah, pretty much. As I've said before and will say again, they are an absolute failure as any kind of practical or effective opposing force to right-wing fascism, and often inadvertently or even deliberately enable it in deeply disappointing ways.

It's funny that in all my posts/answers on the topic, I stated multiple times that if people could provide me an actual reason that made empirical sense as to why they didn't like Kamala, I was happy to have that discussion. Instead I got a lot of weird angry asks from people clearly still trying to justify their Hillary Clinton Derangement Syndrome (I only answered one of them because I have better things to do with my life), accusing me of being "emotional," "angry," "trauma-dumping" and God knows what else. And like. I'm sorry that pointing out a clearly verifiable fact (misogyny is what doomed HRC, anti-Obama backlash/racism was what enabled Trump) triggered y'all to that degree, but I think that fact is pretty illuminating on its own. And no, actually, I don't have to "get over" HRC's loss or "just accept" that people had "reasons" (conveniently never articulated, but they were real! They totally weren't misogyny! PEOPLE HAD REAL REASONS FOR NOT LIKING HER WHY WON'T YOU BELIEVE ME AND ACCEPT THAT!!!) for disliking her and/or not voting for her when her opponent was Donald F'n Trump. Like, I know they live in the magical realm of the Permanently Online where the real world suffers no consequences from their bullshit and the argument about why 2016 was not their fault changes daily, but that's not the case with us here on Earth. And yeah, we're pretty mad.

Kamala has, in my view, been doing a perfectly fine job as the vice president. She has been able to give a few powerful and relevant speeches about race relations, gun violence, abortion, and other topics. I occasionally see news articles from "anonymous sources" who "don't like her" or want to cause trouble for whatever reason, which I treat with the usual degree of skepticism that I employ when reading anything the mainstream media writes about Democrats (which is then repurposed and reused in the Online Leftists' "Democrats Terrible!" screeds in equally bad faith). Yet again, I repeat my offer for anyone who wants to complain about her for an actual and clearly articulated reason to explain what that reason is and why it's not a double standard, why it's not attributable to racism and misogyny (even and especially the unacknowledged sort), what they expect she should be doing differently, and why this is any kind of big deal for the actual mainstream electorate. But judging from previous experience, this will just trigger another round of anonymous WE HAVE GOOD REASONS FOR NOT LIKING HER!!! whines with cheese, and to that I say, yeah, don't even waste your time.

[ts1989fanatic]

Todrick Hall's Comments About Taylor Swift Are All About Support – EXCLUSIVE

Todrick Hall has some famous friends and co-workers. His YouTube channel (which has close to 3 million subscribers) has gotten him worldwide recognition and into the room where it happens with the likes of Beyoncé and Taylor Swift. He choreographed Beyoncé's "Blow" music video after she saw some of his own videos, and his friendship with Taylor Swift got him a featured cameo in the "Look What You Made Me Do" music video. Todrick Hall's comments about Taylor Swift prove that working and being close friends with the star is not what you may think.

Hall and I are on the set of his "Glitter" music video when we sit down to chat about his career. He had already met T. Swift by the time he starred as Lola in Kinky Boots on Broadway in 2016, but it was during this stint in Harvey Fierstein and Cindy Lauper's Tony-winning show that his friendship with the "Delicate" singer really solidified.

"When I moved to New York, I went out to eat with her when I was doing Kinky Boots," Hall tells Elite Daily, "and I had done shows in New York before, but it had been so many years and I felt like I had lost my friend circle. And so I was so happy that she was [living in New York]." Hall says their friendship was a casual one, so he didn't expect her to come see him in the Broadway show.

"She said that she was going to come and see the show and I was like, I'm never going to ask her to come and see it again because I know she's busy, I don't want to pressure her. And she just showed up to the show one day." He says Swift not only saw the show, but she stayed for two hours after meeting, speaking, and taking pictures with everyone in the cast and crew. From then on, he knew he had a solid friend in her.

Hall reveals that, like many on the internet, he believed Swift's niceness was just a front she put on for her famous persona. But he maintains that niceness still holds true in their personal and professional relationships.

"Huge things will happen and she'll be like, 'OK, great. This is what we have to do, this is what the universe has given us, this is what we're faced with. How are we going to fix this?' I would love to handle my minor issues the way that she handles some of her huge issues that billions of people are going to see and judge." He doesn't hint as to what any of those "huge issues" he's talking about are, but her public beef with Kim Kardashian and Kanye West comes to mind, as well as incessant tabloid coverage of her past relationships. (Miraculously, she and actor Joe Alwyn have managed to keep their two-year relationship under tight lock and key.)

"I think that one thing that I really love about her is she has been burned by a lot of people," Halls continues, "and you would think in a lot of ways that she would be totally OK with being a princess locked in a tower that nobody was able to enter. But she's willing to get back up again and trust people again, which is a very scary thing when you're somebody in that position."

Hall has proven himself to be a loyal friend to Swift as well, going to bat for her frequently against Kanye West.

When Swift finally voiced her political opinions in what the internet felt was a long overdue Instagram post, Hall posted on Instagram as well, showing his pride in her decision.

He explained in the lengthy caption that Swift being so guarded for so long about her political beliefs was part of the reason he kept their friendship casual at first. He echoes the same sentiment in our conversation.

Referencing her complete lack of a public political stance over the years, Hall tells me, "She has such power that I don't even think she realizes how much of an affect it would have on people."

He continues, "I was explaining to her that, as a gay person, I didn't know for sure how you felt about gay people and I was a little bit nervous to talk to you about my love life or whatever." And he recognizes the criticism she would receive for not voicing her political opinions before the 2016 presidential election.

Many people justifiably feel that Swift, with such a powerful influence over newly 18-year-old potential voters, could have done much more political advocacy in 2016 than just posting a picture of herself with an "I Voted" sticker. When you have a platform as large as Swift's, it's easy to see how not using said platform in a tumultuous political time would garner heavy criticism. Some of that criticism, Hall says, was pointed at him as well.

As a gay man of color, Hall tells me that people online occasionally placed the onus of getting Swift to "come out" as a democrat on him.

"Sometimes, people would give me flack online that she wasn't doing certain things," he tells me. "I love the fact that she has grown and evolved in her own time, as every artist has to do." He continues, "It can be very scary to potentially risk your career or your reputation to stick your neck out for something when you don't have to do it. You don't have to stand up for gay rights, you don't have to voice your opinion, and you'll sell the same amount of records. But somebody who truly cares about the way this country is falling apart and will take it upon themselves to use their voice to do something — that, I believe, is just the right thing to do."

She did that when she officially endorsed democratic candidates running in Tennessee elections in 2018 (and there was a massive surge in voter registration as a result). But Hall recognizes this was overdue. But Hall knew that being a good friend meant supporting her decision, regardless of how late it was.

So when Kanye West tweeted that he was "distancing" himself from politics, Hall couldn't help but laugh (and call the rapper out on Twitter).

“Well well well Miss @kanyewest," he said, "while I’m thrilled that you claim to have hopped off the Trump train, I cannot help but bask in the irony that you are now ‘distancing yourself from politics’ while the girl everybody was dragging is now promoting a blue candidate like it’s her job." Look what you made him do, Kanye! Elite Daily reached out to West's team for comment on Hall's tweets, but did not hear back by the time of publication.

All tea and shade aside, Hall tells me that Swift is one of those friends who is basically a therapist for him, and vice versa.

Throughout their entire friendship, however, they never had the chance to work together. That is, until Swift asked him to be in the "Look What You Made Me Do" music video.

"I feel like I owe her money for the amount of therapy that she's given me for the boys that I've dated," Hall quips. He reveals that he hasn't always approved of her past relationships either, although he stays tightlipped on just which of her famous exes he's referring to. (Booooo.)

"I think that it's easy to be surrounded with a lot of 'yes' people," he says, "but with Taylor, there was somebody that she was dating that I didn't necessarily approve of and I was definitely very honest with her about how I felt about it. She just would always be like, 'Thank you so much for your honesty.'"

"I feel like it is the most expensive music video that's ever been created in history," Hall jokes.

Outside of working with his bestie on the video, Hall says it was a wonder to see director Joseph Kahn at work on the video. Kahn has directed a large number of Swift's videos in the past, including most of the videos from Reputation. The biggest were "Look What You Made Me Do" and "...Ready For It?" both of which Hall was on set. To perform in the former, and just observe the latter.

"It was amazing to watch [Joseph Kahn] work and to see everything," Hall says, adding, "I was also on the set of '...Ready For It?' to watch that as well. And it was just really, really awesome and to be able to hear the song and to see the sets. I make videos for a living, but to see the budget of how these sets were built and how amazing they look, it was just insane. I had never seen anything like that before in my life."

He brings up his choreography for Beyoncé on the "Blow" music video as a comparison. Beyoncé's self-titled surprise album was famously more low-budget than some of her other videos because it was being kept as such a huge secret, so seeing Swift's massive budget for her Reputation videos was an eye-opener.

"When I did the video with Beyoncé, we went to a location, a roller skating rink, and that's where we did it, so that was the aesthetic of that video," he explains, "But I've never been somewhere where they built an entire world and a cemetery and a thrown and all these things. It was just really crazy to see it and to be a part of it was just really, really awesome."

As for her dancing in the video (people have always trolled Swift for dancing even though she's not near someone like Beyoncé's level), Hall says she's doing it for the joy it brings her.

"Taylor Swift doesn't have to ever dance," he, a professional dancer, says. "She'll still sell the same amount of tickets. She just loves to dance." She danced alongside Hall in the "Look What You Made Me Do" video, and Hall sees it as a huge moment of pride. He tells me, "She was scared at first, she was for sure nervous. But once we saw the playback and I was like, 'You look amazing,' she just kept going in more and more and more and more. Every single time, she'd give it more energy, more performance, and now I see her dancing in [the Reputation stadium tour] more than she's ever danced before. And I'm just so proud of her."

This is why he gets his own membership card

[sordidbask]

BIRTHDAY THOUGHTS

It's my birthday in a few hours and I have to confess something highly personal in writing somewhere so I can come back to it in the future. This is mainly and plainly for me as a sort of personal, public journal so don't bother reading (?).

I've always considered myself at different ages as different versions of myself, like independent with their own tastes and thoughts. For example, 15yo sordidbask was pretty much a religious zealot, 20yo sordidbask loved punk and was much cooler and the current 22yo sordidbask is the absolute coolest of them all. This past 6 months or so (September to March, spring and summer here in the southern hemisphere) have been pretty much the best of my life. It's hard to describe but I found myself exactly at the place I wanted to be, I enjoyed pretty much everything everyday, I enjoyed going to college and passing all my tests, I enjoyed the new music I discovered more than any other time in my life, the games I rediscovered and fell in love with like Life is Strange, I went for walks by myself in the heat of spring and summer while listening to music and enjoyed every minute. I'm happy with myself, with who I am and how I got here, I'm becoming the person that deep down I know I want to be, I had good things happen to me, I voted in two different elections and both of my candidates won to replace the ones who were in charge whom I hated, I've had a ton of experiences I'm gonna carry with me for the rest of my life, I've appreciated every moment with my family, my friends and myself as much as I could. Everything felt right and appropiate. Up until the end of January, I felt truly complete. Truly happy. The highest point of my life.

That said, in a few hours I'll be 23 years old. And the feelings of nostalgia and melancholy have already taken over. I know I have my whole life ahead of me and good things may be waiting for me or not (idk). But I think the sadness comes from knowing that the most happiness I've ever felt most surely won't happen again. I'll probably feel whole and happy in the future but never AS whole or AS happy as I've felt this past spring and part of the summer. 22yo will take those memories with him and become a ghost in the back of my head and 23yo sordidbask will take his place with a blank slate. In August 2019, I could never have imagined that I was in for the greatest time of my life in September, all the way to January-February. And despite the nostalgia and sadness that my favourite version of myself will soon fade away, the thought that the future is unknowable and an adventure gives me hope. I guess the best thing I can do is to keep going, facing the future, waiting and also actively for happy days. Endure the bad. Enjoy the good. Take lt easy and take life not so seriously.

Happiness often comes when you least expect it and look for it. We almost never see the small things that give life meaning coming and thus almost never care to enjoy them while they last. To enjoy the moment. I'm extremely glad and grateful with myself that I was able to do that for the last couple of months. And I'll do my best to start off my 23rd birthday by no longer focusing in the past and the things I loved back then; instead, I'll try to move forward, live in the moment, even if it feels hard as hell sometimes.

The future may be better or worse than the past, either way it's worth finding out and keep striving for the better so when my time comes I'll look back at the ride I had with a smile. Life is meaningless and the only meaning to it is what we make of it. It's a gift we didn't ask for but it's too precious and a damn shame to waste. In the end, we'll most likely go back to the state we were in before we were even born (no state at all, non-existence), we've been given a one-in-a-90000000000trillion chance to enjoy life while we can. So let's do our best to do that.

Thank you, 22yo sordidbask, I'll never forget about you and I'll always love you.