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chooseyouovereveryone · 4 years ago

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10 Years Of Songbird: Brittana Fan Project

Hello my fellow Brittana lovers!

First of all, happy 10 years to the iconic Glee episode that is Rumours and the beautifully moving performance that is Songbird. Such a pivotal part in Brittana's story, and one that will forever be ingrained in my mind. Naya's voice still gives me goosebumps and reduces me to tears on that performance, paired with Heather's genuine tearful reaction.

Second of all, this is up slightly later than planned so apologies for that, but Tumblr glitched on me big time and I had to repost this all again which considering I had a draft built up for days, was rather inconvenient, but we’re here now and hopefully it was worth the wait!

Putting this project together has brought me so much joy in revisiting my favourite ship. I don't think I will ever tire of reading about them, and hearing from others why they love them so much and how this ship resonated with them.

For me, Brittany and Santana were the first positive representation I saw of a WLW relationship. I was shook to the core watching their story unfold, in how much it mirrored what was going on in my own life with my own denial and with my own relationship. I found myself clinging to that storyline like an anchor, as if it was going to give me the answers to my own story. Throughout all the confusion I had in my own coming out and realisation that I was a lesbian, the storyline gave me hope that one day, everything would be okay. Watching them go from confused and conflicted best friends to wives gave me so much hope for the future, and now as a 27 year old out and proud gay woman, I still look at this storyline with the same love-filled eyes.

Even as Glee ended and I stepped away from the fandom, Brittana have always been a huge part of my life, always there in the background, always my comfort storyline to turn to and rewatch a bunch of times. But losing Naya last year really brought me back to the fandom and the community and reminded me why I loved them so much.

I think what I love most of all about this ship is how organic it was. It came from the fans, and from Naya and Heather encouraging the writers to take it seriously. Because of this, I also wanted to add in some little touches of Heya, and include quotes from Naya and Heather talking about their fave scenes.

I'll forever be indebted to this storyline in what felt like a really hard and confusing time in my teenage years.

So thank you Naya

Thank you Heather.

& thank you so much to all of you for taking part.

Also a huge shoutout once again to @hopefulobjectmiracle for letting me use her idea and for providing help along the way. She came up with the concept for this project with Klaine, and I wanted to create a Brittana version, but I'd strongly recommend checking out her Klaine one if you haven't already.

I hope you enjoy reading it, as much as I enjoyed putting it together :)

Brittany & Santana Talk To Holly Holliday About Their Feelings- 2x15, “Sexy”

Choosing a favorite scene is hard so I'll choose one of my favorite lines: in the episode Sexy when Santana and Brittany first talk to Holly about their sexuality, Britt says "I don't know how I feel because Santana refuses to talk about it".

I love this line because most people would play it off as Brittany being a simpleton, but that's not the case. Brittany is saying she doesn't know if she's allowed to like Santana as more than her best friend. She doesn't know if it's right. Because if Santana isn't in to girls then Brittany could be crossing a line, a line where she could possibly be making Santana uncomfortable. Brittany obviously knows how she feels about Santana but she wants to make sure Santana feels for her in the same way before admitting to it, as not to ruin what they already have.

-@neversatisfiedwithlife

Landslide- 2x15, “Sexy”

It was incredibly difficult for me to choose my favorite Brittana scene. There are so many that I love and find important to me...some of these moments were even literally life-altering. Before Brittana, for example, I didn't know that girls could be gay, and I had no idea that what I felt for some of my female friends was anything other than platonic. I'm sure I would have realized I was queer eventually, but this ship and the fandom that I found myself in made the process so much easier for me. But I digress :)

I eventually narrowed it down to four choices—Landslide, Songbird, the Heart Locker Scene in New York, and Cherish/Cherish in Heart, and out of these I've decided to single out Landslide as my numero uno, as it was this very scene that started my decade-long love affair with this ship :)

There are so many things that I love about this scene. Earlier in the show we see Brittany attempt to talk about their relationship knowing that they were more than just best-friends-with-benefits, but Santana would instantly close herself off. Still, Brittany pressed on, determined to understand what they had become, while Santana began to realize that what they had—what they could become—was worth letting herself be vulnerable, worth the risk of getting herself hurt. The fact that Landslide was the product of this early struggle gives it so much meaning ;u;

The scene itself has all these details that make my heart ache in the best way possible...the way they look at each other throughout the song, Santana's eyes a myriad of emotions, full of sadness, confusion, conflict, longing, Britt's eyes filled with concern knowing how much it's taking her best friend to be so vulnerable, then the pride that shines through when she looks at Santana after the performance; the way that Santana's voice breaks singing "and I'm getting older, too"; when she stands afterwards and goes over to Brittany, and Britt opens her arms to hold Santana instantly like it's a reflex; the way that they fit against each other so perfectly, like they were made to be in each other's arms...even the visual composition of the scene was perfect ToT That instant of them hugging each other is a study in contrasts with the way Britt's flaxen hair shines against Santana's night-dark head, and with the way Santana's soft white blouse contrasts against Brittany's deep blue denim top ;u; It's gorgeous.

-@randomcanbian

My fav Brittana scene is when they sing landslide together, because it was one of the first times we got to Santana be so vulnerable

-@snowpickles

What is a landslide? Simply put, it’s defined as a collapse of a mass of earth or rock from a mountain or cliff. That’s the perfect way to describe the rocky relationship between Santana and Brittany in S2, and it‘s exactly why their performance of the infamous Fleetwood Mac song of the same name (Sexy; 2x15) is such a pivotal moment in time in for them.

Santana showed a side of herself to her friends, but most importantly to Brittany, that many would deem her incapable of ever doing. For that moment she allowed that brick wall she always had built up around her for protection to come slowly crumbling down. And the best part? She allowed that — wanted that — to happen. She needed to bare her soul to the person she loved most, but she wasn‘t sure how or when, or if she ever could.

Seeing Santana put her heart on her sleeve and confess her feelings of love and admiration for Brittany through song — finally — is one of the highlights of the entire series for me. We see her trap herself within a new world for a few minutes, one that contains only the two of them through her eyes, and let her emotions do the talking. Brittany understood everything without a single word being spoken to her. Santana hadn’t opened up to anyone at this point about how she felt, not even to herself, but so much was understood between them without saying nothing at all. My favorite spoken line is Brittany‘s, „Is that really how you feel?“

As a viewer, it was such an infamous moment because we now get to cheer for them. We see that they are on the same page with one another, that through it all, their attraction and desire for one another never wavered. They wouldn’t be a a couple for quite a bit more time, but they both now understood what we as viewers saw all along. Santana stopped denying her sexuality; she stopped denying what Brittany meant to herself. She still had a lot to sort out and wasn’t ready to free herself from the constraints of her sexuality, but she made the biggest move: allowing Brittany on the other side of that wall with her.

This performance let to the scene we grew to love known as the Hurt Locker, which is the scene that made the Brittana fandom sing praise to the high heavens. Santana felt like she could finally confess her feelings to Brittany. She was terrified, but she somehow found the courage within herself to stop closing the door on opportunities. So, I‘m thankful for Holly Holiday for being the person that Santana and Brittany felt comfortable enough to go to, and I‘m thankful for her willingness to perform with them, because it gave us much more than a song — it gave us hope. It gave us validation. It gave us Brittana.

-@TheWednesdayProject on Reddit

Hurt Locker-2x15, “Sexy”

"A lot of people have said that scene gave them courage to come out to their parents and their friends and their loved ones, so I think that it's something that's very important, and I hope that we handled it responsibly which I think that we did"- Naya (PaleyFest 2012)

Hurt Locker is my fave scene - just Santana finally coming to feel and admit the truth within. I've probably watched it a thousand times and I'll never get sick of it. The expressions and unspoken acting Naya and Heather put into it give me all the feels!

-@chasingseals

Okay so my favorite Brittana scene is probably the scene where Santana express her feelings for Brittany during “sexy” and says she’s afraid to be with Brittany because of the talks and the way people are gonna stare and that she wasn’t even afraid to what people would say to her face but to what people would say behind her back.

And that’s because I feel the same way. I’m not a lesbian, I’m bisexual, but at the moment I have a girlfriend and I am so afraid to come out to even the rest of my family (apart from my parents and sister) because I always hear them talking about these girls with names such as “dyke” or something, and it was good to see on tv someone with the same fears and it is so good to see that they had a happy ending and got married and that all this started when they decided “not to care” about everybody else’s opinions and be themselves and be happy.

-@wankybjtch

It’s so, so strange to do this without Naya, but here we are, and she and Heather made this all so beautiful. When I tried to answer this question about my favorite scene, I went first to Songbird - Naya has one of my favorite voices in this whole world - and then to Landslide, and then to Me Against the Music, and all those answers seemed really good. Brittany and Santana spoke to each other so much through music - voices and words and touch - and Heather and Naya gave themselves to their characters so much - and Naya to song so much, and Heather to dance - that they would disappear into Brittana, and would just seem like they were love, made visible. Brittana is love always seems like such a true thing to say, to me. But while what occurred to me first were three songs, I realized that my favorite scene - the one that hit me the hardest - will probably always be the Hurt Locker.

Naya was just so shining there, Santana so full of love and this terrible ache and this more terrible hope, all for Brittany, that you could see Heather glowing back, though so much more quietly. It was an absolutely tremendous thing to see a full-on love scene playing out in the middle of a crowded hallway. Naya and Heather were so beautiful together, as friends and as actresses and as onscreen lovers, and after seeing that scene for the first time, I cried every day for a week, always at these quiet, unexpected times. The love and the hurt and the fear and the hope were so raw in Santana - both in Naya’s performance and in the beautiful script - that it brought everything back about the confusion of starting out with that Oh, god. I am never, never going to be like everyone else. I love her way, way too much. But somehow, the scene made my whole world feel safer. I could see myself, and others could see me. There we were on the screen, worthy and beautiful. <3 Tess

-@venuscomb

Songbird- 2x19, “Rumours”

"I really enjoyed watching Naya sing Songbird. That's ingrained in my head, that time where I sat in the choir room and listened to her sing Songbird, because her voice is just of another world. It's always been my favorite. I will never forget that."- Heather (Entertainment Weekly 2021)

My favorite moment is Santana singing Songbird to Brittany because that is an all time classic romantic song, and Santana (Naya) sings it beautifully, and Brittany just sits there mesmerized. Plus I love what they are wearing, and how they look. i think it's signifcant that Santana sang her love for her here in the choir room, and it's where they had many of their big moments - first together, the break-up song, the flowers in 5, the proposal.

-@1908jmd

My fav scene is 100% Songbird. It’s always been my favourite song and to see it applied to a wlw relationship changed my life a lot because it made me realise that it could be me one day. Santana was always my favourite character too, so to see someone that i appreciated a lot come to terms with their sexuality made me really happy

-@illegally-luthor

My first fav scene out of two is Songbird of course because seeing Santana pouring her heart out to Britt is just the most beautiful thing ever. She was scared to accept who she really was and when it comes to her love for Brittany she’s not scared anymore because loving her is the easiest thing to do. Plus, seeing how Britt reacted was so beautiful. She knew Santana was scared and she was proud of how she confessed her love, through a song, because she knew Santana wasn’t good with words.

-@chloesnix2b

Heart Locker- 2x22, “New York”

My favorite Brittana scene is after Nationals in 2x22 by the lockers.

What I love most about this scene is Brittanys tell it how it is attitude. When Santana said that it clearly wasn’t about winning for her, Brittany looked right through her bullshit, knowing that Santana was getting defensive, because Santana knew what this year was really about for Brittany (and herself too of course), she just didn’t want to admit to it.

You can clearly see that Santana is still scared and hiding and that she still feels like she’s is going to lose Brittany any moment. But Brittany reassures her, tells her how much she loves Santana and makes her feel safe.

My favorite Brittany is always when she’s finally allowed to have feelings and say something. Often the writers didn’t give her anything to do or just made her a caricature of a person. But when she was allowed to express herself, it was in her truest, most vulnerable form. Due to writing, Brittana often seemed one sided, but it’s moments like these that show us how much Brittany loves Santana and how much she wants only the best for her.

For me, the scene felt like the real beginning. They have been taking baby steps before, treading the water. But now Brittany dove right in and her boldness made Santana follow her :)

"What about you and I?", "I love you Santana, I love you more than I‘ve ever loved anyone else in this world. All I know about you and I is that, because of that, I think anything is possible."

-@bolintheturtleduck

I absolutely love every scene that they’re in together, but my favorite is the one where Brittany and Santana are standing outside of the lockers, talking about the glee club. i feel like it showed a lot about Santana’s character at the time and it really inspired me.

-@hoodiestring

Officially Dating - 3x04, “Pot O' Gold”

Their first official date at Breadstix!

Santana and Brittany sitting in the warm lighting of their favourite restaurant in the almost comfortable awkwardness of their tender baby relationship melted something in my baby lesbian heart.

They're teenaged best friends who fell in love and this scene is just so fluffy and cozy and perfectly reflects their dynamic - they're so obviously head over heels for each other and everything about their relationship feels new and electric and full of possibility, but they've also been love each other forever. Santana's eyes lighting up at Britt holding her hand and Britt being so purely herself and everything about the scene just screams home to me and is the moment the show really became about them to me.

-@grassberry639

One of my favorite scenes is the Breadstix scene with the holding hand under a napkin because I could completely relate to it when I was dating girls that was still not yet 100% ready to come out.

-@charisadrastea

Rumour Has It/Someone Like You- 3x06, “Mash Off”

My other favorite is the Rumour Has It/Someone Like You scene because the performance was so beautiful and haunting.

-@charisadrastea

For me, it was the Adele Mashup (specifically the longing looks exchanged during it). I watched that scene over and over again when I was a kid because I felt like it did a great job of truly encapsulating what it's like to have feelings that you desperately want to pursue but can't do to your surroundings. The whole thing really stuck with me.

Naya's performance felt so genuine and, throughout that entire song, you could really feel what Santana was going through as a closeted lesbian who was terrified of losing everything. And the fact that Brittany was so close during the whole performance and, yet, instead of her singing one of the lead parts with her, they just exchange looks. I just thought it did a great job of expressing a trapped feeling.

-@aaverageperson

The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face- 3x10, “Yes/No”

My favourite Brittana scene would be the small flashback when the girls are singing The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.

Santana sees Brittany’s face for the first time and she melts.

Their smiles are so soft and I love the instant connection they both have.

-@mostlygleethoughts

My favourite Brittana moment happens when Santana is singing, The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face. She sings the line, “I felt your heart so close to mine,” while a flashback of her and Brittany in the locker room plays. I get teary-eyed whenever I watch this scene. The love between them is so beautiful, and it’s so refreshing to see genuine sapphic love portrayed on screen.

-@sapphicbrittana

Cherish/Cherish- 3x13, “Heart”

It took me so long to decide on what my favorite Brittana scene is but i ultimately decided on the scene at the end of Heart. It’s just such a sweet moment for them. They are openly going on a date and even kiss in front of other people without caring about what anyone might say. They have come so far from the beginning of their relationship and it is just lovely to see them be so happy with each other.

-@sugarcarnation

Ok so my second favorite scene is in 3x13 when Santana asked the god squad to sing a song for Britt. So the scene at Breadstick at the end and the kiss they shared after Cherish/Cherish is just beautiful. Seeing Santana being so proud to call Brittany her girlfriend and singing her song for her is everything to me. Also Britt’s reaction was too cute. The love in her eyes when Joe told them the god squad was going to perform for her is the cutest thing ever. The kiss they shared at the end of the song was so passionate and it gives me butterflies every time I see the scene. It was also the first Brittana kiss we saw onscreen.

-@chloesnix2b

I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)- 3x17, “Dance With Somebody”

"Watching Heather dance is fun in this number, I never get tired of watching her dance."- Naya (BTS Dance With Somebody)

"They put us in twinzies outfits. We've been singing to each other like crazies"- Heather (BTS Dance With Somebody)

My favourite Brittana scene would have to be dance with somebody (the song). I love how happy they both are and how much fun they’re having together!!! The context is romantic, but they’re also having fun as best friends, which is the root of their relationship. I just think it’s really sweet and I’m a sucker for happy pretty ladies dancing around and making each other ridiculously happy. That’s all!!!

-@kurtanaaa

Tongue Tied- 3x21, “Nationals”

Q: What’s your favourite Brittana moment? A: The slow motion celebration smooch when we won Nationals

-Naya (Twitter Q&A 2012)

Mine- 4x04, “The Break Up”

It might seem strange, to choose a breakup scene for a couple's best. It's a scene that broke thousands of hearts and continues to make us cry, even after having seen the whole journey unfold and even after knowing that Brittana will, in the end, be okay. But to me, it's a scene that encapsulates much of what I love about these two and what they mean to each other. "Sophomore year, I used to sit in this back row and secretly watch you. I counted the number of times you'd smile at me, and I'd die on days that you didn't." Half the reason why I chose this scene is this quote. The sheer power of it still shakes me whenever I hear Santana utter these words. The sincerity behind them makes me stop and truly consider what it is she’s saying. It’s a summary of their journey so far. It’s a moment of incredible vulnerability, the confession of a girl who fell in love with her best friend and was terrified of the consequences of that love. Not as much as she was terrified of what it would mean to not be loved back, though.

But Brittany loves Santana with the same passion, even if it manifests differently. It’s why she holds on as long as she can and why it’s even harder for Santana to face their issues. Because you see, I understand that many dislike the reasoning behind their breakup and that it only happened here because everyone else was doing it. But there’s something so deeply caring about the way they consciously make the decision not to hurt each other by leaving themselves in this in-between state of long-distance relationships. Something so genuine about the way they say they would never cheat on each other but also something so mature in realizing that they can’t be what the other needs right now. That, to me, displays such a pure form of love. As pure as catching glances and counting smiles in the back row. As pure as words of encouragement and saying to someone: I'm yours.

Even though they were already inseparable in sophomore year, Brittany smiling at Santana during Glee practice is an intimate moment that meant everything to her. And even though it hurts, Santana letting go of Brittany before they can even think of hurting each other is such a deep declaration of love. What makes it bittersweet yet hopeful instead of just being heart-shattering is the way Santana turns the otherwise optimistic and romantic song “Mine” into a sad one, creating one of the show’s most gorgeous solo performances in the process. Because when she sings Brittany is the best thing that’s ever been hers, we all know it was true in sophomore year, it is true now and it will be on the day they exchange vows. Because Santana’s right when she sings they’re gonna make it, even if it takes a while. Even if they are (and we are) crying right now, even if it takes a few more days of dying in the absence of Brittany’s smile lighting up her world. Because even when they’re breaking up, Brittana reaffirm that they’ll always love each other the most.

-@tuiyla

Santana Walks Brittany Out Of The Auditorium One Last Time- 4x22, “All Or Nothing”

“I really liked the moment in the last episode, when we knew that Brittany was going away and it was a really sad vibe and Santana showed up and just took her hand and walked her off, I thought that was sweet.”- Naya (Perez Hilton 2013)

Valerie- 5x12, “100”

My favorite scene by a pretty wide margin is “Valerie” from “100”. It’s got that palpable backstage chemistry that Naya and Heather had that shone through so clearly in season 1, it’s poetically choreographed, and the songs even more lyrically significant than before.

I believe that Santana and Brittany are at their best and most smitten when they’re doing what Naya and Heather love the most: singing and dancing, respectively. This is no exception. Just look at Brittany trying not to smile at the beginning. When the shot is on her after Santana starts to sing, you can see her face change from smiles to grimace as if she had forgotten herself. You can’t tell me Heather didn’t break there for a second.

Every little mannerism throughout the whole sequence is laced with that fun, alarmingly pure energy. It could’ve been just excellent acting, but it felt so real. And why wouldn’t it? Naya had to learn Heather’s dance from “Sectionals”. Watching your best friend pull off some of your most iconic moves and then joining in, that’s gotta be fun.

Yeah, Santana’s dancing the choreography from their sectionals with Mike. Within the capacity of an untrained dancer, of course. She’s trying to get Brittany back into the groove by dancing probably the most involved number that the New Directions have ever done. And one that Brittany probably had the most fun with because she choreographed it with Mike. That’s some good writing. And it works, and it’s cute, but once Brittany joins in, the sequence deviates from the original.

We get this just wonderful moment of Brittany dancing solo centerstage fully embracing her passion. After she gets her moment, she and Santana dance either with each other swing-style or towards each other. You can’t forget about that embrace at the end when Santana sort of dips her. They’re not even back together at this point. Santana doesn’t want to get back together at this point. But I feel like I’m watching them dancing at their wedding 3 hours into the reception.

And I mean what an appropriate song to use given the circumstance. “Valerie” is about missing an ex after coming back to your hometown. When we heard Santana solo it at sectionals, it wasn’t super meaningful. It was an excellent way to show off Santana’s vocals and Brittany and Mike’s choreography somewhat independently. But here? Let’s talk about line distribution.

First verse, Santana sings solo. Notably, Brittany is harmonizing behind her piecemeal. By the chorus, she’s joined with Santana fully. Second verse, she’s soloing, joining the dance and by the end they’re dancing together. They’re singing and dancing about missing each other together.

But the song’s not my favorite part. Not even the dance. Not really. My favorite part is the culmination. Santana and Brittany are participating in each other’s disciplines and passions.

That’s an awesome couple right there. They went from singing and dancing somewhat removed from each other to singing and dancing with each other, and even when they were broken up, they still shared their respective passions with each other effortlessly.

-@leatherzaddy on Reddit

My favorite Brittana scene is Valerie S5. It just feels so significant to me that Santana chose this particular song to get Britt out of her funk. Valerie is special to both of them, it’s the first competition solo Santana ever got and it was the first time we ever got to witness the dance skills of one Brittany S. Pierce.

It was the first time Brittany got to show off how talented she was and how she was so much more than the dumb blonde everyone thought she was. Now, however, no one thinks she’s dumb. Now everyone sees her as just another statistic for MIT.

Santana, however, sees right through that and sees her for who she really is - not dumb, not just a genius, but Brittany, the girl who loves to dance. So Santana picks the same song from the first time Brittany got to show off her dancing to prove to her once again that dancing is what she’s meant to do.

-@hopefulobjectmiracle

Churros Kiss- 5x12, “100”

The infamous churros scene lives in my head rent free. Why? Because we saw a level of confidence in Brittany that we had never seen before and, in that moment, we were all rooting for her for giving us what we knew was right and what we knew we needed. The fans knew Brittana was endgame, Brittany knew, and we just sat back and waited for Santana to realize it as well. (Let’s give her credit: she knew.) We had waited 1.5 seasons for more and we finally got it, mouthful of churros and all.

I love this scene because we see Santana and Brittany a bit older and a lot wiser; Brittany knows that after all the time they had spent apart, Santana is the only one she really wants and she felt like she needed to tell her, to show her, before it was too late. I feel like everything Brittany did in this scene was very spontaneous and on a whim, and it makes it that much hotter.

The kiss. It’s my favorite kiss between the couple by a mile. Brittany put her heart on her sleeve and risked everything and just went in for the kill. You can see the twinkle in her eye right before she leaned in and she didn’t hesitate to show Santana what she wanted. I do appreciate Santana’s hesitancy because of their storyline at the time, but I don’t doubt for a second that she didn’t want Brittany back, too. She was just incredibly cautious, and no doubt, caught by surprise. They had been through so much and had finally found a place in their friendship/relationship where scars were healing and hearts weren’t as broken as before.

You can see in the way Santana looks at her after being kissed, the way in which she listens to her, that the wheels in her head are already turning. We know she knows what Brittany is saying is true. She just has to process what this means for her, for them, for her life back in New York. She’s just putting the scattered puzzle pieces back together, but she knows what the picture already looks like.

The kiss on the cheek? The delicious cherry on top. Brittany, having already been pushed away, one again doubled down on how she felt and so quickly, and respectfully, reminded Santana of that. You can see Santana’s breath hitch during this moment when their faces are so close together, and it’s obvious that her love for Brittany never wavered. As she always was, smitten is her middle name.

Brittana’s entire relationship from S1-S6 can be summed up, for me, with one infamous line spoken by Brittany during the churros scene, “You can’t recreate what you and I have.”

-@TheWednesdayProject on Reddit

The Lilies Scene- 5x13, “New Directions”

I will always remember being a curious and scared teenager. I was almost in high school when Brittana became official and it suckerpunched me. The fear, the anxiety, the angst, the love, all of it was so relatable. Brittana had so many trials and tribulations and they always came out better and stronger both as individuals as a couple. My favorite Brittana scene is the lily scene because it was the beginning of them consciously choosing each other. The growth <3

-@yesandmusicals

My favorite Brittana scene is when Brittany fills the room with lilies for Santana. It really proves that the connection between them is incredibly strong and they understand each other better than anyone else. Their chemistry is off the charts and you can really feel their love for each other through the screen. The way Santana sinks into Brittany like she’s coming home and the way Britt runs her fingers up and down Santana’s arm <3 Everything about it is perfect.

-@santinacedes

I think my favorite Brittana scene is the one in 5x13, where Brittany fills the choir room with lilies for Santana, because that was the biggest time when I could truly feel their love for one another and their support of each other.

-@allweseeisskyforever

The Bedroom Scene- 6x03, “Jagged Little Tapestry”

It's hard to pick one favorite scene because I just love them all. But I'm gonna go with the scene that made me the happiest and that's the bedroom scene before the proposal because it's such an intimate moment between the two of them. They talk about their future together, about how happy they are and of course "I will love you until infinity". I've wanted a scene like that since I started shipping them in season 2. And watching that scene for the first time was one of the happiest moments in my life. And when I'm feeling down I just watch this scene again and everything gets better.

-@brittanaaresoulmates13

Santana proposes to Brittany- 6x03, “Jagged Little Tapestry

My fav Brittana scene is the proposal bc it means so much to both of them. It takes place where they fell in love and there’s so many parts in the song that remind me so much of their past

-@arf128

My favourite Brittana scene is probably Santana proposing to Brittany because the number they do before is fire🔥 and BRITTANA GETS ENGAGED!!

-@pennywarbler

Hallway Scene- 6x06, “What The World Needs Now”

I LOVE THE ‘did I ever tell you that I love you’ MOMENT. The little kiss and the way Santana nudges her head in Brittany’s neck. I love the whole episode, it’s so powerful and as a lesbian I really felt seen and represented.

I love that Santana reminds Brittany of heaven. I love that Brittany loves Santana so unconditionally, that she would do anything to see her happy. Brittany knows that Santana is super happy right now, but she also knows that she really misses her abuela and that she’s sad she’s not coming to the wedding. Britt’s really doing her best for Santana, and that really shows how much she loves her.

I love that we see Santana’s vulnerable side in this episode and I love to see Brittany’s protective side (especially during and after Alfie). Although abuela said she wasn’t coming, I love how the episode ended because it really shows how much Santana has grown and how much love she has in her life right now.

-@sapphosongbird

Brittany Confronts Santana’s Abuela- 6x06, “What The World Needs Now”

After Santana sings “Alfie” to Abuela López as if her life depended on it in hopes that her Abuela would be a part of her life again, we have my favorite Brittana moment. At first, Abuela is confused and shocked to find out that she’s been tricked into seeing Santana sing. Brittany quickly confessed that she did trick her and informed Abuela, but also informed Abuela not only that she is Santana’s fiancée but that she loves her so much that she would do anything for her. Santana is quick to look at Abuela to gauge her reaction. Santana is hoping she has an opportunity to explain and to try to make her see how much she loves and needs Abuela in her life. Santana brings up how much Abuela means to her and how much being raised by this woman has made her a strong woman.

It’s likely that Abulea immigrated from another country. Like many children from immigrant families, they know the sacrifices their family took to her there. Santana likely heard from father (as i think Alma is her paternal grandmother) about the importance of doing good in school (and her education as she values it) and likely heard stories about the many jobs her grandma took. Likely those that are stereotypical like agricultural work, working in restaurants, or working as a cleaning lady. Jobs that were all she could get because of the limits society places on her (Abuela). ( Santana really admires this woman. She lets her know how much in the coming out scene. )

Santana embraces being Latina and holds no apology for being so, and admits that she is bigger and better than the limits society places on her. Santana wants to continue to be bigger and better. She admits that she can’t (or doesn’t want to) do that without Brittany and Abuela. Santana feels she simply exists without them. Perhaps also saying that they give her the strength she needs to be bigger and better. She is oh so hopeful that reminding her of all that will make her Abuela come along.

Unfortunately, it is not enough for Abuela. She reminds Santana that she loves her, but not enough to attend the stop following her beliefs. She adamantly says that girls marry boys and not other girls. It’s a sin in Abuela’s eyes, and she refuses to attend the wedding. What happens next in this scene makes me so proud of Santana. Before this moment, Santana was this scared little girl who hid behind this HBIC persona. In short, Santana struggled to love and accept herself. She dated guys for status. She rejected Brittany for so long and told her she was using her and didn’t love her. She had beards and even wrote a song about a boy. She had confessed to Brittany that she was scared about all the talks and looks she would get from others. She hid her feelings and love for Brittany and pushed her away into another person's arms. While doing so, she was more angry and miserable than she had ever been. She had to witness the girl she loved more than anything be with someone else because she was too scared, and it hurt her. It would take some more time for her to embrace herself fully. Even then, she didn’t have much choice. She was forced into accepting herself because she was outed to everyone in her school, in Lima, and in Ohio (and anyone who stumbled across that campaign ad online). Still, she did eventually get there. It was not easy for her at all, but she got there. She was happy. She surrounded herself with the love of her friends. She grew as a person. She became friendlier, was happier, and she allowed herself to love others (Brittany, Dani). Moving to New York was scary for her, but she did it anyway (with a little shove from Brittany (again, she thinks they helped to make her bigger and better). She helped her friends get a job, auditioned for Broadway, went to auditions, held various jobs, and attended school.

Santana remembered how Abuela taught her to be bigger and better than her school, her city, and her state would ever allow her to be when she was in New York. She was even bigger and better than the limits she had placed on herself, especially when she was in high school. She was determined to make something of herself. Sometimes even doing things that weren’t even her dream.

No matter the years that had passed, Brittany knew that despite Santana saying she was okay and choosing Brittany over everyone, including the woman that meant so much to her, Santana still missed her Abuela. In this scene, unlike the last time when Santana bravely confessed to Abuela about her feelings and was gay by herself, Brittany was there alongside Santana. Brittany quickly stepped in to protect the woman she loved. Despite being upset that things aren’t going as they had hoped, she puts on a brave face and tells Abuela that it is okay if she doesn’t go. With a smile and some spunk, Brittany tells Abuela they don’t want her there. Santana is surprised that Brittany spoke up at first, too.

Brittany, who usually is kind and sweet, had her claws out. She used her genius mind to give statistical facts she’d read about to tell Abuela off. Usually, Santana would know not to speak to Abuela in such a manner. This is likely because Santana knows better. Her Abuela likely taught her to respect her elders or at least always to respect her. When Brittany finishes talking, Abuela expects Santana to apologize and stick up for her, but to Alma’s surprise, Santana doesn’t. Instead, Santana, the girl who was scared to tell her Abuela she was gay because she feared losing her, stood by Brittany, the woman she loved and who had told her Abuela to go on and love herself in a way Santana likely never has and would never dare to.

Santana doesn’t just defend Brittany or stands by her. Santana refers to her relationship with Brittany as love. She uses their love as an example of what love is. Santana, the girl who told Brittany she didn’t love her and that she was nothing more than just sex because Puck was in the slammer, the girl who refused to talk about feelings, and the girl who panicked when Rachel referred to their duet as sapphic romance, told her Abuela that what she and Brittany share is love. She uses the words “real love” to describe their relationship and what they had.

The choice of Santana words is significant. Likely, Abuela empathized the importance of love when it came to family (even if Santana experienced a lot of tough love from Abuela, her dad, and likely other family members like her mom.) all her life. Santana likely had seen a lot of it.

The choice of the word “real” may indicate just how deeply Santana was hurt when Abuela disowned her. We did see her cry in season 3 when Santana came out to her. Still, the choice of words makes me think that Santana felt deceived about family sticking together and loving each other no matter what (something Abuela mentions in this very same episode in the Queso Por Dos segment) because of how quickly things changed when she came out. All it took was a confession and a few seconds for that love to disappear.

It’s possible she viewed what she knew as love before, as fake love, or love that was not unconditional. Santana choosing to use “real love” to describe her relationship with Brittany is Santana saying, “We stick together and love each other unconditionally, unlike you and I or my own blood.”

Santana then says that Brittany is her family. Again, Santana reminds us that she chooses Brittany over anyone. Again, she’s touching on her previous statement that she and Brittany are an example of “real love” or (as Santana believes with all her heart) a family that sticks together and loves each other no matter what. This is a big deal for Santana.

She is coming full circle because, in the early seasons, Brittany didn’t always come first. She often came second or last to status, beards, prom queen, people’s opinions, etc.

Santana, a girl that misses Abuela, the person she wishes would love her again, has reached a point in her life where she loves herself and Brittany so much that she no longer needs her Abuela or her support, love, and approval. Santana knows she has a lot of that already. A lot, a lot.

The next part in this scene is parallel to Abuela and Santana’s previous scene some years prior from season 3 when Santana comes out to her. In season 3, Abuela told Santana to leave her house with no other word after Santana came out. Despite Santana’s pleas, Abuela had had the final say. In this scene, things are different. Instead of faltering and hiding, Santana puts her foot down and stands her ground. She keeps her head high and has the final say (something that I believe Abuela taught her when teaching her how to be bigger and better than what the world was going to give her permission to be), and Abuela had no choice but to walk away without another word.

To finish this scene, Santana leans into Brittany. Brittany comforts her (like I’m sure Brittany did the first time Santana came into Abuela the moment she could (which I believe was as soon as Santana got into her car where Britt was waiting (just in case Abuela wanted to meet her))). Santana knows she can count on Brittany. She is her family now. They stick together and love each other no matter what, even if it means being disappointed when things don’t go as planned.

Had Abuela and Santana never made up, I would have been completely okay with it because this scene shows a lot of growth in Santana.

It makes me feel so proud of Santana. She cared so much about others' approval. She had been so scared of her feelings for Brittany that she let herself be miserable and made others feel that way, too. Santana ended up being bigger and better than the limits she and society places on her. In doing so, she learned to accept and love herself, Brittany, and their family. Proudly so. While she wanted Abuela in her life, she decided to let Abuela go and instead surround herself with her new family, one that had plenty of “true love.” A lot, a lot.

That is freaking beautiful, and I absolutely love it.

(Also, protective Britt is 😍🥰).

-@lylyluvda916

Pre-Wedding Scene- 6x08

Q: Favourite Glee scene ever? A: My wedding! -Naya (Twitter Q&A 2015)

“My favourite scene to film was the wedding with me and Naya. It’s just a beautiful memory that I am so thankful I have during this time. It happened at the same time as I was getting married, and it just felt like a double wedding, if you will, because that was the title of the episode. It just kind of summed up our entire relationship on the show and it felt so real, and so magical, to do that with one of my best friends.”- Heather (Cameo 2015)

After too much thinking, I’ve decided that my favorite Brittana scene is the pre wedding when they’re getting ready and Britt freaks out because Santana sees her before the wedding, thinking it’s a bad luck thing. And then Santana says to her that rules don’t apply to them and that they make their own luck. After that they kiss in the most perfect way. It’s my favorite because by saying that to Brittany, Santana made it clear that no matter what traditions say or people believe, everyone can choose how to be happy.

-@awesome-shipper

My favourite Brittana scene would have to be just the whole wedding episode if i’m being honest aha (i love all the Brittana scenes lol its soo hard to choose haha) because it shows that love is love and that anyone can get married if you love one another doesn’t have to be man and women, it can be women and women or even man and man! Love is love! I love the episode also because they are just soo cute in it lol, like Brittany having all the pre wedding worries and then Santana calming her down, ahhh its just soo cute aha.

-@elmamacca

It’s so ridiculously hard to pick my favourite Brittana scene, when they all mean so much. Each one means something different for them in terms of their story. Though they may lack screen time compared to other couples on the show, their scenes are filled with so many firsts. First time Santana admits her feelings, first time they mention their officially dating, first kiss, first I love you in a relationship when they're both happy...so they’re each special for different reasons. Even the break up has Santana admit for the first time that she had feelings for Brittany way back in Sophomore year (S1). Something that was implied but never verbalised before that point.

It's hard to pin it down to just one. I love 2x15 for the obvious reasons of getting to see Santana admit what was already clear to see. That she loved Brittany. Seeing her finally admit that was just really poignant for me.

Landslide and Songbird hold such special places in my heart. The bravery. The love. Everything. I felt it all.

Heart was the fluff we so sorely craved for 3 seasons, and they finally we got it in the best way, and we got our first on screen kiss (3 times over).

5x12/5x13 had me feeling euphoric because finally after a season of absolute crap they finally got back together. The kiss was amazing, and we got to see Brittany lay it all on the line for Santana and make it clear who her top choice always was deep down.

6x03 was like a treasure trove of pure joy. The softest bed scene ever which I love for, my fav duet from them and ofc the proposal. Seeing Santana so boldly (I felt so proud of her in this moment) declare her love for Brittany in front of everyone (something she once thought she'd never be able to do), and for Brittany to be able to see that after their rocky start of "I'm not making out with you because I'm in love with you and want to sing about making lady babies", was everything! The call backs to Landslide were just ugh, and it really showed how far they had come. Santana’s speech and how nervous she is, plus Britt’s tears and the way she snatches the ring, lives in my head rent free.

6x06 is also like, incredible, and one of my fav ever Brittana episodes. Just the whole damn episode and how domesticated they are, Santana’s bravery, Brittany’s protectiveness, all the soft af dialogue that looks like it’s been plucked straight from a fanfic. The “did I ever tell you that I love you?” “tell me again” scene is one of my all time favourite scenes from them ever, and I can’t with how utterly adorable and playful and in love they are. Essentially, my love for the ship holds no bounds so there are too many “fave scenes” to count. Truthfully, I could write an in-depth analysis about every single one one of their scenes and how it touched me in some way, but I think if I had to pick just one I'd go with 6x08 the pre-wedding scene.

It's their last major "two-shot" scene and I honestly think it captures everything. Not only is it just contextually sweet the way Santana can't wait any longer to see Brittany and the words that she says, and the way Brittany is nervously freaking out, it ties up a lot of their story. Santana says with confidence "you love me, and I love you" after what seems like a lifetime of self-doubt, finally she knows Brittany loves her and no longer has to question that. This is the same girl who begged Brittany to say she loved her back as a scared closeted teenager, and now she's standing in front of her on their wedding day knowing that Brittany loves her without even needing to hear it. But regardless we do get an "I love you so much" from Brittany, unprovoked by Santana, which again is a callback to that heartbreaking 2x15 scene. It was all Santana ever wanted to hear back then, now she gets to hear it so freely on their wedding day. Their wedding day guys!? Nothing can ever top that for me, for them to have that ending to such a imperfectly perfect story, after all the erasure, the angst, the break-up, seeing them with other people, watching Brittany go off to MIT and thinking yep...this ship is done because Heather's never coming back now.

The way Santana manages to calm Brittany and make her see clearly, is everything, and it really shows that yin/yang dynamic that I love so much about them.

Being someone who felt like I was living vicariously through them and seeing them get the ending of all endings and get married which is such a rarity (or certainly was at the time) for WLW ships was EVERYTHING. There's also the kiss (my fav kiss of there's) and the fact that moments later Abuela comes in and finally makes amends with Santana. It was the perfect, happy, full circle ending to a rollercoaster of a story, and nothing will ever get more satisfying than that.

-@chooseyouovereveryone

Full List Of Scenes & YouTube Links

Brittany & Santana Talk To Holly Holliday About Their Feelings

Landslide

Hurt Locker

Songbird

Heart Locker

Officially Dating

Rumour Has It/Someone Like You

The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

Cherish/Cherish

I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)

Tongue Tied

Mine

Santana Walks Brittany Out Of The Auditorium One Last Time

Valerie

Churros Kiss

The Lilies Scene

The Bedroom Scene

The Proposal

The Hallway Scene

Brittany Confronts Santana’s Abuela

Pre-Wedding Scene

Top 5 Scenes

Each of them had 3 responses each.

Landslide

Hurt Locker

Songbird

Lilies Scene

Pre-Wedding Scene

Season Breakdown

Season 2, Season 3, Season 6 (5 scenes each)

Season 5 (3 scenes)

Season 4 (1 scene)

Season Popularity By Number Of Responses

Season 2 (12 responses)

Season 3 (9 responses)

Season 6 (8 responses)

Season 5 (6 responses)

Season 4 (1 response)

Thank you all so much for reading, participating, sharing etc. I really hope you’ve enjoyed it!

#brittana #brittany and santana #glee #gleeks #glee brittana #glee brittany #glee santana #santana lopez #brittany s.pierce #brittany pierce #rumours #10yearsofbrittana #10yearsofrumours #brittana fan project #brittany x santana

113 notes · View notes

therealvinelle · 4 years ago

Note

Maybe this is bold of me to ask, but are there any deleted scenes from your fics, or scenes you had consideted writing but didn't? And if yes, would you be willing to share them someday?

Oh no problem!

Usually when a scene is deleted it stays deleted, so I don't have a lot to give you. There are a few things that were cut in betaing for various reasons, I can put a few of them below a readmore in this post.

There's the prologue that never was to Nebuchadnezzar's Dream, from back when the fic was supposed to be told alternately from Bella and Carlisle's respective points of view. In the prologue we saw how Bella, Alice, and Edward came to the point where they decided to overthrow the Volturi. Or, we would have, except I didn't actually like that prologue, and found myself jumping straight to writing chapter 2, the "Carlisle is at a party and gets attacked by a werewolf" chapter instead. My good beta @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin asked why I didn't simply make the whole fic from Carlisle's point of view, I realized she had an excellent point, now here we are.

For that matter, this is nowhere near the only significant change that happened to this fic during writing. One example, in the original outline I never brought up Carlisle's gift. Two significant things in the last chapter were not planned until after I published chapters twelve and thirteen, respectively (Luckily for me it'll look like I plotted them all along, so yay for that). For a tightly plotted fic, this one has had a lot of leeway.

Slight caveat, as I’m self-conscious: with most of these you will probably be able to tell why they’re deleted scenes. Especially the prologue. God, that prologue.

(Also, for the record yes I do write other things, but due to 1. being betaed, and 2. being long, I really only have examples for Nebuchadnezzar's Dream.)

The prologue that never was. Apologies for the fluff saturation:

The Babylonian king Nebuchadnezzar II once had a dream.

There was a statue that was gold on top, then silver, then copper, then iron, then clay and iron. As he watched, a rock struck its feet, and soon the whole statue crumbled, leaving nothing but rubble. The rock then grew into a great mountain that covered all the world.

This, the prophet Daniel told the king, was a message from Jehovah.

The statue represented five great human empires, the golden head being the Babylonian Empire, and the following three being those who would come after. The last would be both iron and clay, a divided kingdom. It will fall, and then the kingdom of Heaven will come, crushing those empires in its path.

Thousands of years later, in 1453, the Byzantine Empire fell. The last of the Roman Empire, a divided kingdom, had fallen.

The Christian world trembled, because reckoning was surely near. With the fall of this last, great human empire, all the world would fall to rubble.

Fifteen years had passed.

The Cullens had left Forks behind, settling in the small town of Grafton, Idaho. Carlisle had quickly settled into the new hospital, and Esme had designed a beautiful new home for them while the rest attended the new school. Jasper and Rosalie were Carlisle’s younger siblings while Bella, Edward, Renesmée and Esme comprised another set of siblings. Alice and Emmett were the fosters.

Jacob wasn’t far, he still lived with his old .

«Did you hear they all scored an A on Mr Rosen’s test? Seriously, all of them!»

The words were uttered by Jenna Gilbert, a blonde sophomore who reminded Bella very much of Jessica Stanley. She was sitting on the opposite end of the cafeteria from Bella and her family, though

«Jen, it’s the Cullens, that’s just what they do. You should stop comparing yourself…» her friend said soothingly.

Bella ducked her face into her hand to hide her smile, and winked at Alice, who grinned back at her.

It was Bella and Renesmée’s first time going to high school as a vampire. It was exactly what Edward and Alice had said it would be, for better and for worse.

For the worse, because she spent her days pretending to be a human girl, never using her strength or speed, pretending Edward wasn’t her husband and Renesmée wasn’t her daughter.

For the better, because she got to spend every day with Edward, Renesmée, and the rest of her new family. The others had done the high school routine too many times to see things the way she did, and Renesmée had never known a life without the Cullens, but to Bella, attending high school as one of Dr. Cullen’s adoptive kids felt like she had truly come full circle since that first day she spotted Edward in the cafeteria. She was one of them, truly, irrevocably, and high school was nothing if not a promise of the countless years to come surrounded by the people she loved.

Edward caught her eye, and she smiled back at him. She lowered her shield briefly to show him how happy she was to be with her family.

His face softened into that beautiful, lop-sided smile of his, and he leaned in to whisper into her ear, «You’ll be less happy when you’ve been through English 101,» he said.

«Hey, hey,» Jasper said quickly. «Don’t you dare, Edward, I need all the happiness I can get in this place.» He locked eyes with Bella. «Whatever you’re doing, keep doing it.»

Bella laughed, and rested her head on Edward’s shoulder. He placed his hand above hers on the table, and she smiled. «Not a problem, Jazz.»

Jenna’s voice caught her notice again. «Look at how they’re sitting! Try and tell me they’re not incestuous, Cam. Just try.»

Her friend didn’t reply to that one, although a quick glance informed Bella that the girl was staring at the Cullen table with a frown on her face.

Bella and Alice caught each others’ eye again, and this time they couldn’t hold back the giggles.

***********

Later in the day, Alice’s eyes lit up. «You’ll receive a letter from Stefan and Vladimir a week from now,» she chirped.

«Oh!» Bella exclaimed. «What does it say?»

«The usual,» Alice replied, her eyes slightly distant as she concentrated. «They hope we’re all doing well, and they included a new story of how things used to be before the Volturi. It’s the story of how they once built an entire temple for themselves in just one day. Oh, and they have a new phone number. O-seven nine six five nine six.»

Bella’s eyes widened as Alice talked. She hoped they had included drawings of that temple, it sounded incredible.

Bella hadn’t expected the Romanians to stay in touch, when they left after the thwarted battle with the Volturi she thought they would slink back into the old European shadows they had cloaked themselves in for that past several thousand few years, not to be heard from until some new threat to the Volturi loomed.

But no, that very next Christmas Bella had received a gift from them. It was an old, if flaked painting of Ivan the Terrible looking a lot like Vladimir, and a note from Vladimir explaining how he fooled all of Russia into believing he was their ruler for decades, all right beneath Aro’s nose. Carlisle had broken into a fit of uncharacteristic giggles when he heard that, and even agreed to put the painting in the hallway. To this day, he’d huff with silent laughter whenever he walked past it.

After that, Bella and the two Romanians had been in touch. They’d send her gifts, stories, and their own observations about the Volturi, and she’d respond fondly.

It was a very unlikely friendship, but she was was eternally grateful to all those who had stood with her family when the Volturi came. The Romanians were no exception,

«Are you going to call them?» Alice inquired.

Bella nodded. «They were going to tell me about their visit to Thebes.»

(Outline: Prologue of sorts. Status quo update, everyone’s happy except for the part where the Volturi are waiting to kill them. Alice, Bella, and Edward form their plan. Alice sees that she’s going to have to send Carlisle away, and coincidentally his hospital colleagues are having their Christmas weekend in Montana. PERFECT. She talks to him.)

***********

Heavily altered scene from chapter 7

Carlisle makes more jokes than he did in the final product, they're unfunny to the point where my beta said "you can't publish this", the plague joke in particular is a bit too dark for him so I gave it to Jane instead. More importantly, the chapter itself has a very weird, clunky start:

«Is it the gift of being profoundly unimpressed by ridiculous claims?» Carlisle deadpanned. «Because if so, Aro, I think you might be on to something.»

Several seconds had passed since Aro made his ridiculous claim. At first, Carlisle had burst out laughing. Then, as he realized he was the only person in the room laughing and Aro was staring at him in full seriousness, his laughter had trailed off and he’d been left to stare dully at Aro for several long seconds, waiting for Aro to crack up and say «gotcha!».

Aro never cracked up.

Carlisle had absolutely no idea what Aro was playing at, especially not immediately after Carlisle had very reluctantly decided against shutting him out of his life.

«You can’t be serious,» he’d said.

Aro had sighed. «I’m afraid I am.»

And now, at Carlisle’s deadpan guess, Aro only shook his head. «Not quite.»

Carlisle stared at him for another second, before he ventured another, scathing guess. «Are you hoping it’s the power of being highly suggestible? Because I definitely don’t have that, or I would have abandoned my diet centuries centuries ago.»

Aro just looked at him. «If you would let me explain-» he began, but Carlisle cut him off.

«No, no, you want to try and convince me I have some sort of gift, then I want to guess at what you’re going for,» he said, crossing his legs at the knee and propping his chin up on his knuckle in a faux-pensive look.

«Now,» he continued, even as Aro gave him the world’s most unimpressed glare, as if Carlisle was the one who was being ridiculous, «I’m pretty sure I would have noticed the power to throw fireballs by now, so it can’t be that,» he mused aloud. «Same goes for the power of…» he searched his mind, «turning into a bat. That one would definitely have come up at some point. Or maybe I should suspend myself upside down in a cave. See if it triggers anything. Just to be sure.»

«Carlisle,» Aro murmured, but Carlisle wasn’t done.

«Maybe I spread disease. My father certainly thought demons did. Maybe that’s why I get so many interesting patients. Those brain fungi,» he nodded towards Renata, who was still sitting with the book open in her lap, «I’ve had two in one year. That’s a lot.»

«Carlisle-» Aro tried again, but Carlisle held up a finger, a wide grin spreading across his face.

«The power to change my eye color. You see, yesterday they were black-»

Aro actually rolled his eyes at that. Of course, he made the insolent gesture look like a fluid, enchanting movement.

«Yes, quite funny, now if you would let me explain…» Aro tried again while Carlisle tried not to snicker at his own joke.

***********

Two deleted paragraphs from chapter 9. The alteration was made because it was a bit on the nose about what Renesmée does.

Humans were mammals, and mammals were hardwired to protect their young. This extended across species, making mother cats care for puppies and humans care for anything that was small and cute. The instinct to love and cherish anything cute and helpless was an evolutionary necessity, and had to run deeper than anything if a species wanted to survive.

Enter Jane, who was the smallest, cutest thing Carlisle had ever seen, but from a species humans instinctively knew to fear. Maybe the very fact that she was something that humans knew they should want to care for made their fear exponential, made it impossible to deny that something was very wrong about her, that they were looking at a predator.

Perhaps too there was something to vampires having retained some of that human instinct to protect their young, if the countless stories of covens dying to protect their immortal children was anything to go by. Carlisle himself had been no exception when the Volturi came for Renesmée, even as he found himself risking the lives of countless friends.

How far things had come, he thought, from preparing to die along with his loved ones at the hands of the Volturi to sitting across a café table with Jane and pitching costume ideas.

***********

Chapter 9 was heavily altered, mainly as it was too funny the first (and second!) time around and I kept having to return to insert more existential dread. A side effect of this is that Carlisle in the original draft was still undecided on whether he had a gift up until the very end of the chapter, whereas it's proven beyond a doubt much earlier in the published version.

Jane was looking a bit daunted, though it was nothing compared to how Carlisle felt.

Silently, they went to stand in front of one of the many sports stores that Whitefish had to offer.

«This could still be confirmation bias,» Carlisle whispered, and leaned against the wall. For all the human blood that was in his system, his knees felt oddly weak.

Jane let out a startled laugh. «You’re seriously still in denial?»

Carlisle shook his head quietly. «They reacted pretty reasonably, just because they didn’t run away screaming…»

«Reasonably?» Jane echoed dully. «Carlisle, you can’t actually…» she shook her head. «Remember that bubble we talked about?»

Carlisle put his head in his hands, and let his fingers move up, under the wig, pulling it off in one neat motion.

Jane shook her head at him. «You look even more glamorous with your real hair.»

Carlisle still said nothing, balling the wig together in his hands.

Could it be he actually had a gift?

***********

The chapter 11 outline originally had Renata and Carlisle failing to communicate like normal people because they've spent too much time with Aro, and unintentional innuendo keeps ruining their attempts to make polite small talk. Sadly (or happily) this is a lot easier to conceptualize than carry out in actual writing, and their conversation wound up being far too serious for that, so it was cut. Luckily for you I did pen Carlisle flashbacking to a time his foot got in his mouth:

The moment after the words were out her face scrunched up.

Carlisle snorted. «Aro is a horrible influence on us all.»

He remembered one of his first talks with Jasper, when they were still getting to know each other.

Jasper had been a little starstruck when he learned Carlisle’s friends in Italy were those Italians.

He’d asked Carlisle a lot of questions once he got past a misplaced sense of awe, wanting to put a face to the eternal, petrified, leaders of the vampire world.

During a hunt with just the two of them, Jasper had been asking about Aro’s gift.

«What do you even think about when you’re with him?» Jasper had marvelled aloud, and he would later explain that the way he say it, this was like the way the Egyptian gods supposedly measured souls.

Place your heart upon the balancing scale against the weight of a feather, and if your heart weighs heavier it is devoured by the demon Ammit.

Place your hand in Aro’s, and if he deems you guilty of breaking his law, you will be torn to pieces in the space of a second.

Being friends with the man sounded unbearably stressful to Jasper.

Unfortunately, Carlisle’s mind had gone in the opposite direction, and what came out of his mouth before he could stop himself was, «England.»

He’d covered well enough for that, or he hoped he had. Jasper never asked.

***********

Chapter 11 was also supposed to have Renata being brave enough to ask for a selfie with Carlisle when they're both in black robes, this because I just really want Edward to sift through the Volturi group chat after all this and finding that. Alas, I couldn't work it in there. (Determined to not lose the joke, I had Aro take the photos in chapter 12 instead.)

***********

Chapter 12, the fandom ghost requested I include another butt slap and offered me fanart if I fulfilled her wish.

And so:

He held up a hand, presumably to touch Carlisle’s arm in comfort, but just then Alec started retching.

«He ate human food,» Jane deadpanned to Demetri, Felix, and Renata. Shaking her head, she brushed Alec’s hair out of his face as he hurled into the river.

Aro grimaced slightly, his hand hovering in the air.

Carlisle felt all the bread, corn flakes, and water that he’d swallowed press uncomfortably against his esophagus. «I’ll do you one better, Alec,» he choked, before he span around, fell to his knees and started retching, much like a cat.

Aro, evidently not sure what to do with his arm but not about to let it drop purposelessly, gave Carlisle a supportive pat on the bum before kneeling beside him to hold his hair as he hurled.

It was funny, but simply didn't fit the tone considering what happened after. It had to go. But hey, I got the art.

#there's more but these are the things that came to mind #my fic #nebuchadnezzar's dream #fic spoilers #of sorts kinda #doktrajediscovery

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iekxow · 4 years ago

Text

Reposted from my Wattpad

Xiao x electro yaksha reader

Requested by @yoruna_tokito (on Wattpad)

Trigger warning: Mentions of suicide, blood, and death.

Aqua water, golden leaves, and fresh air. A break from your everlasting duty to protect Liyue and its citizens. You sat upon a ledge of a mountain as you took in the beauty of Luhua Pool. The clear and unpolluted waters of Liyue were always fascinating to see, and the trees surrounding Luhua Pool never got old to watch. They aged slowly, turning from the little saplings from thousand years ago to the majestic, large trees that would forever accompany Liyue.

You had lived thousands of years, most of those going towards working under Rex Lapis, who was now known as Zhongli to the residents of Liyue Harbor. The Archon of Geo had rescued you and Alatus, better known as Xiao, from the evil god who had gotten hold of both Xiao's and your weakness, who then made the both of you commit horrible crimes that could never be repented for.

Xiao had been tasked with eating the dreams of his victims, while you had been, against your will, sucking the hopes out of those who opposed your old ruler. It wasn't at all pleasant, to say the least, but to say that the hopes of others didn't taste good would be a plain out lie. Especially back then, when both immortals and mortals who weren't being controlled by a master could freely wish to do anything they liked. You and Xiao both had that right taken away from you.

Before the control of that god, you and Alatus had lived as friends. Quite good friends, who would often visit each other every day. For some reason, Alatus had stopped talking to you after meeting the god who you grew to resent.

You were both later saved by Rex Lapis, who then offered you a job as one of the Yakshas. After serving your duties in the Archon War, three of the Yakshas turned against each other, successfully destroying each other. A fourth had disappeared. He likely caused his own end because of the unbearable pain from karmic debt. This left you and Xiao, the two surviving Yakshas.

Back at the present, you hummed a tune, which you probably heard a few hundred years back, and fiddled with your purple mask while quickly walking away from someone who had just been approaching. Adepti have no need to meddle in human affairs, you thought while giggling to yourself, sounds like something Xiao would say.

For the thousands of years you have been an Adeptus, there was not a human who was as bold and fearless as the one who had just called out to you, telling, almost demanding, you to come closer so that he could sketch you.

"Me? You do realize that my presence alone could destroy you, right?" You were just as confused as you were annoyed. Does he not understand that the Adepti already spend most of their time protecting Liyue and its people? We don't need humans intruding on the days we have to ourselves.

"Huh? I'm the famous painter, Vermeer. You must have heard of me somewhere."

A painter named Vermeer? Didn't ring much of a bell to you. "Painter? I know what a painter is, but I've never heard of any 'Vermeer's in the thousands of years I've been in Liyue."

"Ah. You're one of the th— two surviving Yakshas, am I correct? I expect that someone so old would like my paintings. Many of the elderly people of Liyue enjoy my paintings. Don't you?"

Elderly... old... just who exactly do you think the Adepti are?!? Have you no respect for the very people who protect you? You obviously didn't like to be called old. Indeed, being called old is almost always hated by people, but to you, it felt more like mocking. Something along the lines of 'Haha, you won't ever be able to age and live a normal life.'

"Look, I'll stop bothering you if you let me sketch the basic lines of you. I just need a model and you're the only person who's here right now."

You cave in, agreeing to let Vermeer draw you as long as he stopped bothering you afterward. "Fine. I'll stay for a few minutes. I don't care if you can't finish within that time. I have more important issues I have to attend to."

Vermeer held up his end of the deal, not speaking even once while working on his painting.

"Hey, are you done yet? I'll get going soon. Wrap up your sketch." You didn't exactly know why you wanted to leave, but the man was acting quite weird. He kept checking his watch and looking behind you.

"Uhhh... uuuhhhh... just a bit longer, please."

Please? What a change of attitude from before— Wait. Behind me?!? Who's behind me?

"Well, well, well. Long time no see, (Y/N). If it isn't the other Electro Yaksha. You took my rightful place as the Electro Yaksha."

"Hey, wait up. No one ever took your place. There weren't and aren't a limited amount of spots for the Yakshas. And why are you so upset about the fact that we're both wielders of electro? Above all that, where the Archons did you disappear off to?"

"You've gotten weak. I've been training all this time for this. Hahahaha! I'll finally be the Electro Yaksha!"

"Get that stupid idea of yours out of your head, dummy. I wanted to get along. Didn't you see? None of us ever thought of you of anything less than us five. Why don't you open your eyes and get that thought out of your head?!?"

He goes in for an attack. You dodge. Ten entire minutes into the fight, there still wasn't a clear victor.

"Ah. I'm done warming up. Time for the real fight. Try to keep. You'll probably lose anyways."

You silently curse. That was his definition of a warm up? Last time I checked, he wasn't half as strong as this—

"Ah!" A scream tore itself from your lips. First try, and he already landed a hit on you. Your left shin had been scraped by the long blade of the other Electro Yaksha. You immediately whipped out your weapon, (Y/W). Looks like talking won't be an option.

"Haha, like I said, little (Y/N). Those years you spent lazing around have weakened you quite a bit."

Where did he get so strong? Was he somehow trained by the Tsaritsa? By the Abyss? You tried attacking, but those attacks seem to not take any effect on him. Blood slowly but steadily seeped out of the wound on your left leg, dragging your speed down by a whole lot.

Another cut. This time, he aimed for your dominant hand, and you screamed once again, your panicking voice not at all matching the peaceful scenery of Liyue. Wait, where did that Vermeer go?

Your question was answered by a hand holding on to each of your arms. Vermeer was working with him... for what reason? You kick and trash, but your wounds weren't exactly helping, and you didn't have much energy left.

The other Electro Yaksha had a wicked grin on his face. "Hah, I defeated you before you even had the chance to use your mask."

Tears stream down your normally peaceful face. You cry, wishing that Xiao could help you.

"Don't worry, I'm here now. You can relax." Xiao's soothing voice seemed like a light in the void of darkness you had been swallowed in.

First, he took care of Vermeer. Just a few strikes, and he was unconscious. You stood for a few seconds before your left foot decided to give up on standing. Your body collapsed, and possibly because of the loss of blood. The last thing your eyes saw before blacking out was Xiao's spear colliding with his weapon. Thank you, Xiao.

Your eyes slowly blinked a few times, then opened completely. "Xiao?" You said the first thing on your mind.

A soft voice spoke from your left."That was dangerous. Don't go anywhere without me knowing, please. I can't lose you too."

"I'm sorry, Xiao. I'll train harder. I guess he was right. I got weak."

"He's wrong. You're not weak. I-if you ever wanna train, I, uh, could help you."

"Aww, is little Xiao embarrassed? Anyways, sure. Who else would I train with? You're my favorite person, and you're strong."

"I— thank you."

You threw your arms around Xiao. "I miss being like this. Why did you even stop talking to me? Is it because of the 'sins' you've committed? Have you forgotten that I've done the exact same thing as you? We've both done terrible things, but everything's going to be fine now, Xiao."

Xiao looked down, and, surprisingly, returned the gesture, wrapping his arms tightly around you. "If... if you don't mind... I..."

"Eh? What are you trying to say?"

"I would uh, kinda like to try out a thing called dating...", he finished with a tint of pink on his cheeks.

"Ehhh? Really? I almost thought you hated me."

"Uh— uhh—"

"Are you kidding me? Of course the answer's yes. I've liked you for so long, you idiot."

Xiao blinked, trying to take this new information in. "You have?"

"Yeah. But don't worry, we can take things slow. We have eternity, after all. I suppose that's one good thing about not being able to age. No matter what happens in the future, we'll protect each other. I promise you that everything will be fine, Xiao."

Hope you enjoyed it! Requests for any of the characters are open! (not counting Klee, Diona, and Qiqi, unless it’s sibling!reader)

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin xiao #xiao #genshin x reader #liyue #xiao x reader #yaksha #fanfic #genshin fanfic #xiao genshin impact #genshin impact x reader

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starr-fall-knight-rise · 5 years ago

Text

HASO, “Saint.”

This is a bit short today, but we were also short-staffed at work so I didn’t have a lot of time. I hope you like it anyway

Sunny sat beside the pool of water, her spear resting across her knees watching the strange Drev as he knelt by the pool staring at the water below him. She still couldn’t tell how old he was. He could have been as young as she or older than her father had been when he passed, but either way she couldn’t tell.

The dark black of his carapace undulated so black it reflected blue.

They didn’t speak for a very long time, and she closed her eyes thinking quietly to herself as the sun rose overhead.

With the way the mountain encroached in around them, they didn’t see the sun for more than an hour or so before it sunk below the high cliff face once again. Moss was soft below her, and when the sun hit it it burned white hot, but she closed her eyes and relaxed taking long, slow deep breaths through the breathing holes at her neck. In for several seconds and out for several seconds until the world around her seemed to fade away.

In her mind it felt as if she could hear the thrumming of an engine, the Omen whirring above her in the darkness, comforting and warm like the arms of a parent. She missed its warm darkness…. Or did she just miss Adam who she associated to heavily with that place, with the ship.

It occurred to her just then that…. Well she didn’t really associate him with anything else.

The thought gave her a wave of displeasure as she realized.

His identity had been so tied up in his job and ho he was that she…. Well she wasn’t entirely sure if she had ever known him otherwise. Had she just been in love with an idea, had she just loved him simply because no one else had ever seemed willing to try. He was.... The captain of a spaceship, and that was simply everything.

It made her sad sadder than she would have liked to admit.

He had seemed so much more to her then that, so much more than just his job, but th more she thought about him the more she realised she couldn’t rationalize why she had thought that, and what sort of logic had brought her to that original conclusion. He was hollow, a representation of something amazing on the outside but filled with sawdust in the middle.

It wasn’t commentary on him of course. These thoughts weren’t here to make her regret or even to convince herself that he hadn’t been worth it because he had.

He was just…. So lost.

The past few days had convinced her not to feel sorry for herself. That wasn’t the way of the Drev.

But thinking about him, lost and alone, a gossamer through of a person with an identity not his own. She wanted to weep for him, feeling more sorry for the man than she ever had for herself. She thought she understood him now.

Sunny knew she understood.

He was a man who knew he was broken, a half man constructed from one thought. He didn’t believe himself worthy of someone’s attention and so had let her go to save her the hurt of bein with someone like him. He was wrong, of course, but she understood the logic.

In the same way that she would rather take any physical punishment so he would never have to experience it is the same way he would take any emotional punishment to protect her. Inside her chest her heart slowed and her body grew still under the sun, growing warm and then cool as the shadows passed over her.

Until there was nothing.

“It is good to see that drev of your generation have mastered such mental discipline and patience.”

She opened her eyes looking in consternation at the dark Drev who now sat before her, not feet away, and facing her.

She thought she would have noticed him approach, but evidently had been too caught up in her own musings to notice.

On his lap, the Drev held a decorative silver spear with intricate carvings up the side, and the blade sharpened to deadly cutting points by the most artfully crafted Drev obsidian under which would have been a steel and iron cutting edge for when the obsidian was likely to break. It was the most beautiful weapon Sunny had ever seen and she stared at it in awe.

“In past epochs many foolish and impatient Drev have been weeded out by this one simple test.”

Se frowned, “What test.”

He hummed in amusement, “Patience. They storm in here spears bristling and demand I teach them the way of the saints. They threaten and hey rage, and sometimes they would demand I duel them, those that demanded a duel never left this place. But patience is a thing not many Drev understand, for striking first may be advantageous, but the ability to wait for the perfect moment, is a skill not many acquire. Before that there were others, those who would almost have the patience but then would break the silence too early. Sometimes it took them weaks to pass the test with their incessant questions , you're not the first who has come to me, bu you are the first to pass this simple test.”

Sunny looked down at her feet, “I am afraid it is not patience so much as… preoccupation with other things.”

The other Drev seemed to be pleased with this revelation, “Using silent meditation to sort your thoughts is a worthy endeavor, and shows someone with an active mind. Tell me…. Did you find any peace in your thoughts.”

Sunny looked up at the distant blue sky and the clouds that rolled down from above, “I think I did.”

He seemed pleased.

“That’s good, you are further along than most of the Saints were when they came to my mountain.”

Sunny stared at him, “You talk as if you were there, but you can’t be that old.”

He chuckled, “Perhaps I was, perhaps I wasn’t. It's hard to remember with a life like mine. Maybe I was an extension of someone else, maybe I was told the stories as a child as if they were my own. Who can say. Regardless, you have already mastered the skills of patience and careful thought, which is not something that is often common in those who come to my mountain.”

“What IS common.”

He sighed, “Impatience mostly, a lust for power, greed. They don’t usually last long.”

There was silence between them for a long moment, “What’s your name/”

“Naktan Chal but Naktan will do, and yours?”

“Chalan.”

“The name seems like a stranger on your lips.”

She shrugged sheepishly, “I am not used to hearing my name spoken in my own tongue.”

He tilted his head in curiosity, “And what tongue do you hear you name in.”

“The tongue of humans.”

“Humans.” he seemed surprised, “I have never seen a human. I have heard their ships, and their war machines, but have never ventured down from my mountain.”

“Sunny is what they call me.”

“What strange sounds, but surprisingly melodic.” he tilted his head, “tell me, Sunny, why are you here and what do you hope to achieve while on my mountain.”

“It is complicated.”

“The whole story then.”

She sighed, “I assume you can see that I am…. I am….”

“I see that you are short, is that what we are getting at?”

She looked down at the turquoise water, “yes.”

“And?’

He didn’t seem to care and she looked up at him in surprise.”

“Everything, everything about you is an opportunity to take an advantage on the battlefield. Some of our traditions are steeped in lies and the misconstrued words of a few confused prophets. Traditions often become twisted and as times go on. The important part of that particular piece of spiritual doctrine is if you can lift a spear. If you cannot lift a spear is when the original wording of the original doctoring takes effect. Though you are small, you can lift a spear, if you only have one hand, you can lift a spear. The tradition of the recycling only comes when the Kit being born has defects so severe they cannot lift a spear.”

“If a kit were born blind?”

“The kit can still lift a spear, can still smell and feel the currents of wind, can still hear the thundering of feet on the ground and the spear whistling through the air.”

Sunny stared at him in awe, “I had…. No idea that's what the…. Original doctrine said..”

“No one remembers. There is a certain air of elitism in the new drev tradition.”

Sunny paused and nodded, “I think that is what I wish to change.” he listened intently, “I fought the humans, during the Drev war…. Do you know of it?”

“I am kept appraised, yes.”

“Well no one expected me to be good at fighting because of my…. Disfigurement. When the Drev war came along I finally found a foe, I thought I could beat, but when we ripped them apart they came back later with synthetic limbs and we lost the war. In an effort to fight against a mother who never approved of me, I went to learn from the humans, thinking that maybe they could help me. I learned in that time that…. The way we have been doing things, may be done better. That we could learn from them, and in my travels across the universe, that assurance has only grown. I wish to bring the Drev into a new age of martial doctrine, one that matches with the universe we have found ourselves a part of. I want to keep the old tradition alive, and by doing that I know that it has to change.”

Naktan stared at her his fance unreadable for a long moment, but then he bowed his head, and when he looked up again his yellow eyes were twinkling with some sort of…. Merriment, or perhaps excitement.

Either way she couldn’t tell, but supposed the expression was a good one.

“The saints smiled down upon you, wanderer.”

He stood, and with the tip of his spear, he reached out and touched the surface of the water causing a delicate wave of ripples to roll out over the pool, “I will guide you in the right of creation.” he rolled the ip of the spear in the other direction, “I will guide you on a journey to bring the martial doctrine of the Drev into a new age. I cannot tell you how long it will take, and I cannot guarantee you will leave as the same Drev who came here. But I can promise you, that I am glad to see you, and I am pleased to help in your honorable efforts.”

He kicked up a wave of water into the air, and when he did shining sparks of clear seemed to refract rainbows against the sky.

“Sleep, and tomorrow we begin.”

“And may you begin your journey unto sainthood.”

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apothecarinomicon · 4 years ago

Text

Spring week 5 part 2

⇦ Prev ● First 〇 AO3 ●Next ⇨

We found Mòrag standing at the edge of a circle of waist-high boulders, facing in towards the center. MacKay whispered to me that this was where he'd left the mayor, but that the stones hadn't been here when he did. We stopped and stood a few meters away. From that distance, I could hear Mòrag mumbling, but I couldn't make out what she was saying. As we watched, she turned, walked to another boulder outside of the circle, and began to roll it to the center. Mòrag is a visibly strong person, but even she should have struggled more than she did with a rock of that size.

Seeing Mòrag's behavior and being familiar with the commonly accepted modus operandi of Lèabeinn, I was pretty sure I knew what her affliction was: a magically-induced monomania called druidic madness. Personally, I find the term "madness" here to be stigmatizing and pathologizing something that at the end of the day is not the afflicted's fault, so I prefer to call the ailment "druidic daze"—but don't tell the Academy that. Regardless of what you call it, the symptoms are the same: first, the afflicted's senses are dulled until they lose awareness of their surroundings completely. An obsession with creating stone circles, these rings of boulders that druids use to worship and perform magic, then grows in their mind. They pursue this task single-mindedly, foregoing food, hygiene, and rest, with predictable results.

The potion used to treat druidic daze, fortunately, is famously easy to make. It only has one required ingredient: cynic ivy, the leaves of which can both block the magical influence on the patient and sharpen their senses. Cynic ivy, I remembered, grew near the top of Moonbreaker Mountain. So, I turned to MacKay and instructed him to run to my cottage and retrieve my cauldron and enough tinder to make a small fire. He was reluctant to leave Mòrag alone, but I assured him she wasn't abandoning her project any time soon. He sprinted off, and I turned and headed back up the mountain.

────⊱⁜⊰────

As I passed the rock candy cluster on my way back up, I paused. I figured it wouldn't hurt to sweeten the potion, to make it easier to get Mòrag to drink it. I once again left the path and walked through the underbrush to reach the rock, and I didn't even have to use my sickle this time! As I was chipping off a healthy chunk though, I heard a screeching noise from above. A shadow passed over me. I looked up in time to see a large avian shape swooping down, and only barely managed to scramble out of the way before it snagged me.

I sprinted away, taking only a brief glance behind me to confirm my suspicion: this animal was much too large to be a bird of prey. While it had an eagle's head and wings, it had the body of a lion. I was being chased by a bona fide, real-life gryphon. They're not an unheard of animal, but they're extremely rare. I didn't even know there were any in the area. They were hunted nearly to extinction around a hundred years ago—often for sport, but also for their soft pelts and large feathers. People would buy these at at exorbitant prices, to use in the ways people do with soft pelts and large feathers. To make matters worse, gryphons typically don't do well in captivity (they get anxious and pluck out their feathers, leaving them susceptible to infection), so most conservation efforts failed. The general population didn't have much incentive to aid specialists in their conservation, either—gryphons are (as I experienced first-hand today) territorial and aggressive, often perfectly willing to attack, maim, or kill anything that wanders into their territory if they perceive it as competition for prey. Thus, they've been struggling along on their own, mostly isolated and unable to do any more than maintain their population even though hunting them has been outlawed entirely for almost a century. It really ought to be a generally-known fact if there's one living in the area, as much for the gryphon's safety as the peoples'—but then again, maybe it is common knowledge and I just never got the memo.

Fortunately for me, like the lions with which they share the majority of their physiology, gryphons aren't known for their stamina. If they're going to catch their prey, they need to do so within the first dive or two. If an animal is still able to run away after a gryphon's initial attack, it'll usually escape. Still, I figured it was better to be safe than sorry, so as I ran I searched for a rocky outcropping to hide under. If it lost track of me from above, I figured the gryphon would have no incentive to keep up the chase, and would go off to find easier prey.

I quickly spotted a cliff overhang just a little ways off the path. I sprinted into its shadow and pressed my back to the rocky wall, trying to slow my breath. I heard the gryphon's wings beating as it circled above me. It cried out once, and then flew away. I watched it retreating until I was sure it wouldn't return. Only after I lost track of it did I emerge from my hiding spot and continue up the mountain.

────⊱⁜⊰────

I worked my way up Moonbreaker Mountain, which neared the clouds at its peak. Cynic ivy grows well in colder environments and gets saturated with oxygen easily, so I knew I'd only find it near the top.

Find it I did. I was short of breath by the time I saw it growing along the sides of the path, but I kept climbing, trying to find the largest leaves for the most potent potion. The wind whipped through my hair, and I could barely see as twilight fell. Before I knew it, though, the slope leveled off; I had reached the peak of the mountain. As the first stars winked on in the sky, I plucked a few of the largest leaves I could find off the cynic ivy vines. I once again heard the sound of wings flapping and felt the rush of air as something landed behind me. I whirled around, ready to defend myself against the gryphon, but what I saw instead made me freeze.

Great leathery wings, bones webbed with blue and gray skin, folded in towards the body. The immense reptilian body, nearly the size of a house and covered in scales that glittered like the stars above them, settled lower. Wide, intelligent eyes with slit pupils surrounded by solid violet gazed cooly at me. I was standing before a dragon. This was not the dinky little domesticated lizards that rich people kept as pets, either—no, this was one of the dragons of old: giant, smart, and potentially very dangerous, depending on its mood. Dragons of this size were supposed to have been extinct, for centuries now. How in the blight was I looking at one?

And it was looking right back at me. "Congratulations," it said (it spoke!!). "Very few manage to make it this far up the mountain."

I wasn't sure what to say in response. I'm pretty sure what came out was something along the lines of "you're… are you… you are a dragon?"

It chuckled (I think) and confirmed that indeed it was. It introduced itself as Trénmór, of the Windswept Peak. I said I'd thought dragons of its size were all long dead. It asked me if it looked dead, and I conceded that it didn't. I said I'd have to let people in town know; a major subspecies of dragon long thought extinct was alive and well! Forget the townspeople—I'd have to inform the Academy!

The dragon told me I would do no such thing.

When something of Trénmór’s size tells you to do something (or, in this case, not to), it does carry a certain level of persuasiveness. Still, I asked it: why? If one ancient dragon had survived, there could be more. Even with only two or three or four, the population could grow and thrive again. It told me that it was perfectly happy in isolation—it would certainly much prefer living alone atop Moonbreaker Mountain than being swept away to an unfamiliar place to be studied and gawked at and bothered all day.

Trénmór told me it didn't expect me to adhere to its wishes based on that reasoning alone (it said something about how it had spent enough time around humans to know better), so it said it would make me a deal. It would give me a gift and tell me a story, and in exchange I would let it be. I told it that seemed fair, but did warn it I might be back to get more cynic ivy at a later date for my potions. It told me that would be fine—me returning by myself wouldn't do any further harm.

Trénmór directed me to retrieve a smooth rock from the ground by one of its forepaws. I was still wary (it was enormous, after all), but I obeyed. On closer inspection, Trénmór's scales actually did seem to have faint rays of light coming from between them, like actual stars in the night sky. I didn't look for too long, though, because being so close to it made me nervous. The rock was a chalky gray. Its surface was smooth and it was cool to the touch—overall, unassuming really. Trénmór told me it was a moonstone, and that some said it actually came from the moon in the sky. It told me I could use it to purify the poison from any potion, no matter how toxic the brew might be. It warned me, though, that the stone had a limited number of uses, unless I could find a way to purify the stone itself.

I decided that, as a gift, the moonstone would certainly do.

Then, Trénmór directed my eyes upwards towards the night sky—it was fully dark and the stars were all out by now—and pointed my attention to a particularly bright star. With one claw, Trénmór drew lines between this star and those around it, in this formation:

The shape itself was just a vague kite with a few protrusions. It was the story that Trénmór relayed that made it stick in my mind. It told me that the constellation was called Boötes (pronounced 'boh-WOH-teez'), the grape-grower. The story goes that Boötes once invited Sucellus, god of agriculture and alcoholic beverages, to visit his vineyards. Sucellus was so impressed by the rolling green hills and fresh ripe fruits that he shared with Boötes the secret to fermentation and wine-making. Boötes tried the wine and enjoyed it so much that he invited all of his friends to join him and try it and together they partied late into the night.

However, having never awoken to a hangover before, the next morning Boötes' friends assumed that he had tried to poison them. Furiously, they rose up together and killed Boötes for his perceived crime as he slept, without even allowing him a chance to explain. Sucellus, saddened by the death of his friend, lifted up Boötes and placed him among the stars with his cup, so that he might revel in the gift of wine forevermore.

Despite the simplicity of the tale—not to mention its relatively unsatisfying conclusion (no consequences for the murderers?)—I found myself utterly engrossed. Perhaps it had something to do with Trénmór's storytelling style, which was absolutely hypnotic. It swirled with vivid detail and sparkled with careful inflection in a way that heightened the dragon's narration.

I thanked Trénmór for the story, and it told me when I returned to get more ivy or another resource from the mountaintop it might tell me another. It told it that that was very generous—and it agreed.

────⊱⁜⊰────

Once I’d met MacKay back at the shrine and collected the cauldron, here is what I did:

First I set water to boil.

Once it was rolling, I added both the candy rock and the cynic ivy and let them steep.

I only took the potion off the heat once the candy rock was entirely dissolved and the mixture had become a kind of ivy tea with a uniform green color.

I decided to call the potion Druid's Draught—it'll be easy to remember what it cures that way. With MacKay's help, I got Mòrag's attention and fed her the potion. Pretty much immediately, she sagged into MacKay's arms. She had been moving boulders for hours; she must have been exhausted. Still she found the strength to grip my sleeve and thank me, and apologize repeatedly (which I obviously waved away).

Together, MacKay and I helped her down the mountain and back into town. Once we'd made it to the square, MacKay told me he could handle getting her the rest of the way home on his own. He thanked me and paid me, and headed off into the night. I headed home myself—it was quite late, and after the rollercoaster of the day I needed my sleep.

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andoqin · 4 years ago

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C-Novel Rec

So, I have a Deep Abiding Love for Chinese Webnovels, but not often do I get one that actually gets me deep in my heart in a way where I think about it after I’m done and so I wanted to talk about it a little here.

The novel I want to talk about is called Rebirth of a Star General (重生之女将星) , by Qian Shan Cha Ke (千山茶客). If you’ve read (hetero) c-novels, you might know her name, since she also wrote the novel Rebirth of the Malicious Empress of Military Lineage, which is almost a classic in this kind of rebirth genre.

This Rec/Review/overlong essay is going to contain spoilers, so if you’re completely allergic to those I’ll just give you my TL;DR here: I preferred it a lot over RMEML.

Now to my endless wall of words:

Rebirth of the Star General is pretty much what it says on the tin, main character He Yan, is a famous general in her own right, but no one knows about it because she was only the stand-in for her sickly brother. When her brother grew up and was no longer sick, the family decided that he should receive the military honors she had earned and she would be married off. This was possible thanks to the fact she had always worn a mask, so as not to be discovered.<o:p></o:p>

He Yan was not entirely happy with this decision, but she thought she would make the best of it. Of course, it gets worse because not even a year into her marriage she is first poisoned and then blind as a result and later murdered by her cousin, a concubine of her husband.

She gets reborn as He Yan, beloved and spoiled daughter of a city guard and vows revenge, both on her former husband and on her family, but most of all she longs to become a general again, but this time under her own name and with acknowledgement of her being a female general.

If you want your rebirth novels to include lots of face slapping or intricate revenge plotting, this is not the novel for you, since soon after she is reborn, she kills a guy out of self-defense and when his family and the city guard are after her she uses this chance to enlist in the army, disguised as a man.

This is where she meets her arch-rival in her previous life, a man so gorgeous, once again entire paragraphs are filled trying to describe his magnificent beauty - a hallmark of this author if I ever saw one. She decides she will use this chance anyway, her knowledge of military tactics and her knowledge of her rival (and former classmate) possibly being beneficial in this case.

The author makes it a point to emphasise that He Yan struggles initially to keep up with the military training, since she is now inhabiting the body of a woman who does not have experience with hard work and that she has to work twice as hard to be even mediocre, in the beginning. Obviously mediocrity does not lead to quick military advancement, so her getting incredibly fit very quickly anyway is not very realistic, but even before she had enlisted, He Yan had trained her new body and she has many years of experience as to how to get better and fighting experience, so I gave the novel a pass on that one.

Up to this point the novel was entertaining, but it didn’t really grip me too hard, although I was impatient enough to MTL it, but as the story goes along He Yan really developed into one of my favourite c-novel heroines ever. So often in novels like this, the female character is treated as exceptional and all other women are dumb bitches, often just in the way of our main couple and dispatched accordingly. But He Yan does not treat other women like this and over the course of the novel builds lasting connections with all sorts of women.

And then there is the scene that made me go: okay yeah, this is going right up the favourite list.

He Yan meets up with the Second Male Lead (who never really is a serious threat to the OTP, He Yan only ever sees him as a friend and somewhat nice guy) and he tries the “oh you’re so unique and special, no other woman is like you” speech, but He Yan stops him and rips into him and the patriarchy in such a beautiful way, that even MTL doesn’t hamper:

"A-He is very different from ordinary women."

He Yan looked at her, "What's different?"

Chu Zhao continued to walk forward, his voice still soft: "Most women, even though they are faced with such a predicament, are already numb and indifferent, and do not think as much as Ah He does. If A-He is thinking about them now, it is very likely that they wont enjoy it, and they will even complain that you are meddling in their affairs."

He laughed: "This sounds a bit condescending."

Chu Zhao smiled, "Why do you say that?"

"The court is a man's court, the world's affairs are a man's world affairs, even when studying in the battlefield, it is men who are the only ones who have the grace. It is so unreasonable that men take advantage of the world, but in turn blame women for being numb-minded and unmotivated, what is this if not superiority?"

"Brother Chu thinks that I am different from ordinary women because I have studied, I have left the house, and I even went to the military camp. But if you let those women be like me, who have seen the snow of Liangzhou Wei, the water of Jiyang City, the long moon of the desert, the rivers and mountains, do you think they would still be willing to be trapped in a jealous mansion, would they still be complacent and numb and foolish?"

She smiled a little bit like Xiao Jue, "I think the men in the world are worried about this, so they have set up many ridiculous rules to bind women, breaking their wings with the three rules and five rules, and using those unwarranted 'virtuous wives and beautiful women' to judge them. The more foolish they are, the more reassured the men are, and the more they say, 'See, the women are shallow', when they are the ones who caused it!"

"Because they also know that once women are given the chance to 'choose', they will never become a vase in the harem with their hands outstretched waiting to be fed by their husbands. Those good women would become generals, chivalrous men, scribes, staff, and compete with them for the grace of the world, and they, in turn, might not win."

The girl's eyes were as clear as the water in the springtime of Ji Yang City, transparent and clear, seeing clearly and distinctly, as if they could reflect the most splendid daylight.

He was always able to speak well and would not bring the atmosphere to an awkward point, but at this moment he did not know what to say. It was as if there was nothing he could say to refute the person in front of him. It was clearly a ridiculous, insouciant, naive and annoyingly righteous statement, but it shone out the shadow of a human being, with nothing to hide.

He was also uneven in his heart.

Although pretending to be "He Ru Fei" had brought her a lot of pain in her life, it had also taught her to see sights that many women would never see in their lifetime. If she hadn't pretended to be "He Ru Fei", she would not have known that men could do so much more than women. If you were talented in literature, you could be a bachelor with a full belly, if you were skilled, you could be a general with a good war record. Even if you were mediocre at everything, you could still be the most ordinary man on the street. To put it mildly, even at the Raketongzhuang, women were gambling prostitutes and men were gamblers.

It was only because she later became "Madam Xu" and worked as both a man and a woman that she realised that the world treats men and women so differently, that it is not that men do not suffer, but their suffering can be the basis for judging themselves. The women, on the other hand, spend their lives waiting for the men's affirmation of their hardships.

It is obvious that they are both born as human beings, but who is more noble than the other? It is ridiculous that some men still look down on girls from the bottom of their hearts, which makes people speechless.

and this is when the author pretty much states why He Yan would never be with SML

Chu Zhao and Xiao Jue were, after all, not the same. With women, they both considered them weak and unable to protect themselves. But the former's judgement had a hint of negativity and condescension in it, while the latter, as evidenced by the treatment of the female corpse in the Sun family's backyard in Liangzhou City, had more to do with pity.

And I loved that so much??? Yes, both the ML and SML have patriarchical attitudes towards women, but for He Yan there is a subtle and important difference. And this continues to be a theme throughout the book. One woman later keeps telling her son “Don’t underestimate women!” to later add, after He Yan has become a female general in her own right, under her own name, that He Yan might not be the only female general, there will be two, three or even more.

The romance is of the very, very slow variety and the main couple doesn’t even get together until the last quarter of the novel, officially, but before that we have all sorts of delicious fake relationship, cohabitation and other delightful tropey shenanigans.

The slow romance and relatively easy way the revenge is dealt out might mean this is not for everyone, but if you’re into a nice novel about a woman realising her goals, with a man who will always support her by her side, this might be for you.

And yes, she continues to lead armies after they are married :D

#rebirth of a star general #i read stuff #rec #novel rec #het novel

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zaph1337 · 4 years ago

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Monster Hunter Rating 30: Fatalis, the Dark Demise

The world of Monster Hunter is a dangerous one. Monsters with powers unlike any animal we know run rampant, and some of them are so powerful as to be compared to natural disasters, or maybe even gods. These “Elder Dragons” are viewed as forces of nature given body and mind, and wherever they are, they’re almost always at the top of the food chain. But it begs the question: what is the strongest Elder Dragon of them all?

Some would say that Lao-Shan Lung, the Old Mountain Dragon, holds that honor. After all, it will destroy entire mountains if they stand in its path, and every hunt with one is a race against time to prevent the monster from reaching and destroying the fortresses that separate it from the settlements it would crush beneath its feet as it wanders. But why does Lao-Shan Lung wander? Why does it never go around the obstacles in its way? Why will it never fight back against the hunters that pose a serious threat of killing it? The answer is one that no one wants to accept: Lao-Shan Lung, what may be the living incarnation of an avalanche or some other seismic force, is not wandering. It’s running for its life. Elder Dragons may be the embodiments of natural phenomena, and though we may not like it, death is just as natural as landslides and lightning. We’ve come a long way, but it’s finally time to talk about the final boss of the first Monster Hunter game: the Black Dragon, Fatalis!

(How it appears in Monster Hunter 1)

(How it appears in Monster Hunter World: Iceborne)

Appearance: If the wiki had a third render of Fatalis that I liked, I would’ve put it up there. Anyways, Fatalis looks just like an archetypal European dragon; four legs, two wings, horned head, and a long tail. It looks pretty generic, but there are a few things that help it stand out. First off, it’s huge, being 4110.6 cm (134.9 ft) long in every main series game it appears in except for MHW:I, where it’s 4137.17 cm (135.7 ft) long. That’s 30+ ft more than Diablos or Gravios, and if you wanna see how big Fatalis is compared to a person, well...here’s an image from MHW:I:

Yyyeeah, it’s big. Something else that’s interesting is the fact that Fatalis has eyes which are literally made of crystal, which is why they look shiny in the above image. They still look a lot like traditional dragon eyes, though. In fact, basically all of its design elements are things that you’d expect to find on European dragons, which makes Fatalis look rather generic. You’d think that even in the first game, the devs would be more creative with their final boss considering the other dragons in the game, but that’s just it: Fatalis stands out when compared to a lot of the other dragons in Monster Hunter because it looks just like a European dragon and not much more. This makes it feel like it’s not just a dragon, it’s the dragon. When you hear stories of dragons wreaking mass destruction, you’ll likely imagine something that looks just like Fatalis, and I believe that that’s exactly what the developers of MH intended when they made it. It’s kinda genius, in that way, and combined with the overwhelming presence Fatalis has thanks to its size, I feel like I have to give it an 8/10.

Behavior/Lore: Since I like to cover the lore of a monster in this category anyways, I thought I might as well change its name to reflect that. Anyways, people don’t know a lot about Fatalis, such as how many there are, where there ideal habitat is, their mating rituals, stuff like that. The reason why we don’t know a lot about Fatalis is that it kills literally everything it sees, which tells us a lot on its own. Fatalis doesn’t always eat what it kills; it just kills for the sake of it, and since literally everything that breathes seems to be on its sh*t list, this has led to the conclusion that Fatalis hates all livings things on the grounds that they exist.

As I alluded to in the introduction, the natural phenomenon that Fatalis likely embodies is death itself. All other monsters are terrified of it, and, as seen with Lao-Shan Lung, will go to great lengths to stay as far from it as possible. How strong do you have to be to make a monster that bulldozes mountains run for mommy? Well, let me put it this way: Fatalis obliterated Schrade Kingdom in a single night, and now uses the ruins of the castle as its den; the very sky above the kingdom’s remains is a perpetual bloody red, with a miasma of purple clouds that hover over the fallen settlement. And that’s just what we know is true; according to legend, Fatalis could scorch all the world’s lands in a matter of days, causing the end of life itself. Obviously, this can’t be proven, nor do I know if they’re talking about one Fatalis or all of them (however many there are), but when legends like that are circulating, it’s a wonder that people aren’t living in constant fear that this thing will decide to visit their settlement one day and kill everyone. Well, not so much a wonder as it is a conspiracy; the Hunter’s Guild, fearing that the fear of Fatalis’ capabilities could lead to an outbreak of panic and anarchy, has done its best to relegate Fatalis and all stories related to it to the realm of fantasy. Only hunters who the Guild believes are skilled enough to possibly repel or kill Fatalis are allowed to know that it exists, and even then, when the Guild sends them on secret missions to fight it, they almost never come back.

Though Fatalis leaves few witnesses to its attacks, there are some who provide valuable information about the dragon’s habits. After Fatalis kills a hunter, it melts said hunter and their equipment down, then applies the remains to its body to armor its hide, making it even harder to kill. Now, some say that this is an instinctual behavior, like how the monster Nerscylla wears the hides of its prey for the same purpose, but Fatalis is only known to do this to humans, which wouldn’t make sense because killing monsters would give it more material to cover itself in. This has led some to believe that Fatalis knows that hunters make armor from the remains of the monsters they kill, so it makes armor out of them to mock them in death. If this is true, then not only is Fatalis smart enough to have a concept of irony, it harbors a special kind of hatred for humans in particular, and it presumably enjoys killing them. These things make Fatalis even more terrifying and dangerous than previously thought, and put its attack on Schrade Kingdom and its occupancy of Schrade Castle in a new light.

Speaking of equipment, the few times anyone has actually killed a Fatalis and made weapons and armor from its parts, they’ve almost always regretted it. Those that wear Fatalis armor have been victims of disturbing phenomena; horrible nightmares and periods of unnatural, unwanted strength are a common occurrence, and some have reported feeling as though something is possessing them and forcing their legs to move against their will. In extreme cases, hunters who have been knocked unconscious while wearing the armor report feeling that something was controlling their bodies before they awoke. But those people are the lucky ones; hunters who wear Fatalis armor for extensive periods of time often disappear without a trace, or even die for no apparent reason.

Not even the weapons are safe. Some cause the wielders to hear phantom screams, others induce feelings of gnawing despair or paranoia, and some are even said to corrupt the wielder’s soul, turning them into a force of bloodshed and chaos as Fatalis was...or is. In Monster Hunter Generations, a cave in Pokke Village contains a giant version of a Black Blade, a Great Sword made of Fatalis parts, which can be mined for Fatalis materials. It’s been noted that the damage done to the blade by mining it will regenerate in a matter of days; when you combine that with the symptoms of using Fatalis equipment, it gives credence to the possibility that Fatalis lives on through said equipment, controlling the bodies and minds of those that slew its corporeal form. Whether this is true or not is irrelevant; the fact remains that Fatalis equipment has a deleterious effect on those that use it, and as such, it’s recommended that none should attempt to utilize anything made from Fatalis’ remains at all.

If you thought that Fatalis as a life-form was fundamentally wrong before, then I have one last bit of absurdity for you: the one time anyone ever found a Fatalis egg, the newborn that hatched from it grew to its adult form in literal hours, and presumably hated everything that breathes from birth. Other than that, we don’t know anything about its life cycle or parental habits, and the wiki doesn’t say what happened after the baby reached maturity, but we can reasonably assume that it was a bloody event.

I’ve never been more enthralled by a monster’s lore than I have been reading about Fatalis. The developers really went out of their way to impress upon players just how unnatural and evil Fatalis is, and the result is the monster to end all monsters. I think my favorite parts are the fact that the Guild covers up Fatalis’ existence to prevent society from collapsing and how even its equipment is too dangerous to be around. And even with this, there’s still so much we don’t know about Fatalis, which makes it even more intriguing. With how much I’ve been thinking about all this the past few days, I feel like I have to give this category a 10/10.

Abilities: Obviously, Fatalis is one of the strongest monsters in the series. Its body is very durable due to its habit of melting down hunters to use as armor, and even the membranes of its wings are has hard as metal. It can both fly and charge at high speeds, with the latter doing massive damage thanks to Fatalis’ raw strength. However, its most famous ability--and its deadliest--is its fire breath, which is equal in power to some other Elder Dragons. The streams of fire that escape from Fatalis’ maw are even bigger than the dragon itself, and can be so powerful that they one-shot hunters caught in them. Fatalis can also spread a cloud of reactive powder around it; igniting this powder causes a devastating explosion.

Now, conceptually, these attributes and attacks aren’t too crazy, but there’s one more thing I want to mention: In Monster Hunter 1, you fight Fatalis in 4 quests (assuming that the wiki’s quest list for the game has all of them), and in all of those quests, the goal is “damage Fatalis as much as you can to drive him away,” not “slay Fatalis.” This means that Fatalis is so much more powerful than anything else in the game, the Guild does not believe you are capable of killing it. Despite all of your accomplishments up to that point, the Guild still doesn’t think you have what it takes to kill the darn thing. Now, considering the goal doesn’t say “slay or repel” or anything like that, I was under the impression that you couldn’t kill Fatalis in the first Monster Hunter, but a video on the wiki shows that you can, so I guess the devs phrased it that way to make you feel even cooler for achieving what even the game thought was impossible. It’s a nice touch. Anyways, Fatalis’ abilities may not sound like anything special for a dragon, but the sheer power behind its attacks, as well as how much work you have to put in to damage it in any meaningful way, gets it an 8/10.

Equipment: Since most, if not all of Fatalis’ equipment is inherently evil, I’ll mention if the descriptions say exactly what they do to the user. Let’s start ourselves off with a Hunting Horn called the Black Lute:

According to its description in MHFU, “[a]nyone who hears this Horn feels faint.” Kinda counterproductive, considering the Hunting Horn’s whole gimmick is that it buffs you and your allies with magical songs. Its upgraded form, the Fatalis Menace, isn’t much better, as “its song causes listeners to turn into disheartened beasts.” So already we see the dangers involved in using this weapon, but the description is lore that doesn’t impact gameplay, so strum to your heart’s content! As for how the Lute looks, I like the use of Fatalis horns as the majority of the main body, and the little red gem is a nice touch. Next up, something a little less evil, actually! The Dual Blades called Double Dragon require both Fatalis and Lao-Shan Lung parts, which I guess makes them okay to use?

I say that these aren’t evil because their description just says “[t]he Dragon element infused in these Dual Blades hits enemies from both sides.” Though, you do have to make them by upgrading the Fatalis Sword and Shield called the Black Sword, and according to its description, “[t]he void it creates envelopes all in its path[,]” which makes me think that these are probably still unsafe to use. Though I do like how the blades are different shapes and sizes to match up with the dragons they came from. But you know me, if a monster has a weird or goofy weapon, I gotta show it off, and Fatalis isn’t exempt from this. So here’s the Light Bowgun called the Black Parasol:

I was gonna make a JFK joke, ‘cause one of the theories surrounding his assassination was that someone used a gun disguised as an umbrella to shoot him from the side, but I don’t think I can make a joke like that without being tasteless, especially since this weapon apparently has “an assassin's thirst for death.” But here’s some tasty lore for you: the Black Parasol’s upgrade in the Japan-only MH4U, the Dark Parasol, was “designed behind the scenes by the Guild for assassination purposes.” This may be a translation of the Japanese description, so “assassination” might just mean “kill,” but it makes you think about how weird it is to call hunting a monster an assassination; there’s a chance that the Black Parasol was made by the Guild specifically to kill people, and that just raises more questions. As for the Parasol’s design, it’s so out of left field that I can’t help but find it amusing. The doily-like trim combined with the swirly handle makes it impossible to take seriously, which was probably the point.

Now, here’s where things get a bit messy; the wiki doesn’t have very many pictures of Fatalis armor. The ones it does have are small, not the standard Fatalis armor, or don’t have an image of the male armor to go with them. So, I have to resort to using the small images of the “S” armor from MHFU. I’ve made them bigger to avoid straining anyone’s eyes, but they’re all blurry now, so I apologize if I miss any details you think are important. Here’s the Blademaster armor:

Oh, my God, they gave the women’s set a helmet! Aaaannd it’s for the armor set with low-quali renders online. Yaaaay. Okay, that aside, this does look awesome. It definitely looks like armor that would make you evil if you wore it, and the curved horns on the helmet really add to that theme, as do the spikes on the arms and legs. As for the Gunner armor:

It looks really cool, too! Seems that the wings are attached to the arms in lieu of arm guards, like the ones you see on other Gunner sets. The horns on this set are pointed up this time, presumably for reasons related to peripheral vision or something like that, which is helpful for someone using a gun. The boots on the armor look like dragon feet, and combined with the wings and other design aspects, makes this armor feel like the one that’s most likely going to let Fatalis’ soul overtake you.

Overall, the equipment does what it was made to do: look powerful, yet evil at the same time. It seems like something that fanfic authors would make use of for their worldbuilding--something like how the greatest hunter in the land went missing after killing Fatalis and making equipment from it, only for horror stories of a black knight wielding cursed armaments wiping small settlements off the map and slaughtering travelers. This is the first time that equipment lore factors into the scoring for this category, and I might have to look at the descriptions of the equipment I choose in future reviews to see if that affects my opinion on it any. For now, Fatalis’ equipment gets an 8/10.

Final Thoughts and Tally: The creators of Monster Hunter wanted to make an unforgettable final boss, and they succeeded. The concept of a truly evil, apocalyptic monster in a world where most monsters are basically animals adds to its intimidation factor, and I can only imagine how kids felt when they saw Schrade Castle and the skies above it for the first time. It honestly makes me sad that I never had the original Monster Hunter as a kid, ‘cause the impression Fatalis and the fight with it would have had on me would likely have stuck with me to this day. One thing’s for sure, though: if I ever get a Monster Hunter game besides Rise, it’ll probably be Monster Hunter World and its Iceborne expansion, ‘cause aside from the Coral Islands, fighting Fatalis in a modern game would be exhilarating. 8/10.

#monster hunter #monster hunter rating #zaph1337

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razorblade180 · 5 years ago

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Sunshower 12

“Wow, That sure is a lot of you just dumped onto me.” Kali said to Ilia. The two women sat on the Belladonna porch and drunk tea, discussing the events that had transpired recently. “So, did it feel good?” The feline smiled.

Ilia slouched in her chair. “I don’t see how that is important.”

“Mmmmm I think you do.” Kali bluntly stated. “It’s definitely not the most important, but definitely top ten. Five...maybe three?”

“Can we move on from this if I answer the question?”

“Of course!” A childish smile grew on Kali, as if she was a gossiping school girl. Ilia took a long sip of her tea before looking into it. She had an answer to Kali’s question. Thinking about it was just so...much. Damn Sun, making her brain do these mental gymnastics. “It felt...gratifying. No, that’s not the word. Each time was under a different circumstance but all three times had this strange feeling I can’t quite describe. I just know the feeling wasn’t a bad one. It was very exposing, in more ways than one.”

Kali nodded, “I see. Makes perfect sense”

“What makes you say that? I sound like a riddle.”

“Yeah that’s emotions for you, they don’t make sense most of the time. Not unless you take the time to understand what causes them.” Kali watched Ilia’s face scrunch up. Kali couldn’t help but giggle. “Sorry, I don’t mean to make light of your situation by any means. I just wasn’t expecting such a face.”

“You should’ve. What exactly do you mean by ‘understand what causes them?’ I hope you’re not implying…” Ilia turned a little pink.

“Ha! That’s between you and him” Kali waved her back forth. She would never give such reckless advice, on the first go around. “All I meant was to look inward, ask the big questions you know you’re avoiding. Making mountains out of molehills is a problem both you and Blake share.”

Hearing that didn’t exactly give Ilia a warm feeling. Thinking about Blake still made her very upset. Kali caught on to the girl’s unpleasant silence.

“Sun gave off that same demeanor when he was around Blake.” Ilia snapped back into the conversation now she was looking guilty. Kali smiled softly. “Now, now, no need for that face. Like I said before, emotions take time to understand. The same way hurt needs time to heal. I do hope you both don’t remain upset with my daughter. You mean so much to her.”

Coming to Kali was a good idea. Her words were always so understanding. Neptune had been doing a good job but it felt good to have a more familiar face to confide in. Judy would’ve been good if she wasn’t so….Judy all the time.

“I know. The problem was she meant more to me than I did her, but I’d rather not get into that at the moment. Let’s back pedal a bit. What do you personally think would be a good way to start sorting things out?”

“You see I’m more of a full throttle kind of woman, but that might be too much for you.”She laughed lewdly, emotions make themselves known in the heat of the moment.”

Ilia was once again rethinking her decision to tell Kali. “Please be serious.”

“I am!!!” Kali exclaimed, her tea almost spilling. “That’s up to you though. It gets results though.” More pink spread on Ilia’s face. “Kali, that’s not an option! In case you have forgotten, I’m me!”

“So?”

“What do you mean so? Sun is outside my particular wheelhouse. That would be weird, completely out of the question.”

“Yet here you are, telling me he’s taken you to bed.”

“Hey, I took him to bed. Not the other way around.” Ilia corrected.

“Sweetie you are only making my point more valid.”

“I...well...that doesn’t change anything! Listen this is uncharted territory for me and it’s for good reason. Guys don’t do it for me. Never have, never will. Connecting, confiding, simply just being myself; I’ve learned a long time ago who brings those out of me. It would be insensitive to Sun if I toyed with him in such a way. He’s a good guy, a friend. He’s my friend.” Those words made her smile. It was nice to call him a friend. So why did it make her feel selfish too. Inconsiderate even.

Kali kept carefully watching the girl as she poured more tea. Though Ilia was fairly mature for her age, Kali had to remember most of it came from experience derived from sorrow. Outward forces had shaped her. It was tough to say just how much internal self reflection she’s done, but Kali was positive the subject of romantic feelings was one Ilia had a thorough rasp on. Still, like everyone, there’s always a few things that get overlooked or haven’t been explored yet.

“You have a good point, You would know yourself better than anyone else would. I bet this is a topic you’ve had with yourself countless times. Yet I can’t but wonder….” her voice trailed off, confusing Ilia.

“Wonder what?”

“The world is a big place with countless people. Plenty of which fall into groups we don’t usually find ourselves associating with. Like how the White Fang. Many members chose a side that resonated with them, but it didn’t mean there weren’t a few who looked on the opposing side and saw someone and felt connected with. Haven is proof of that. You’re proof of that. I know I may be out of line and even far too presumptuous, but is it too crazy to think one person who doesn’t fit into your usual ‘wheelhouse’ might work just as well; that a single boy out of billions could...invoke feelings of some kind?

Ilia didn’t know how to respond to a question like that. She wasn’t even sure if she followed the logic correctly. It had to be false though, right? One out of two consistencies in her life had already been toppled over when she turned traitor. She was so sure about Adam’s actions. Her actions, but those were called into question; until eventually she realized the cracks in those beliefs. This was different though. It wasn’t political, it was personal. Ilia knew who she was in that regard. If she didn’t then…

“If you’re right, then what does that say about me?” Ilia clenched her teacup,cracking it from the pressure from her anxious hands. She didn’t know why but she could feel herself tear up. “I’ve never known anything about myself my entire life? That can’t be true.”

“It isn’t. It just means you’re growing. What you know is gaining more knowledge.”

“That’s frustrating. It’s downright upsetting, and scary.”

“Sounds like to me you just understood your feelings”

Ilia let out a small gasp. Her eyes widened, shocked about the way Kali had gotten an inkling of Ilia’s complex feelings figured out.

Kali took Ilia by the hand. “Now then, what are you going to do with that knowledge?”

“The million lien question. Doing nothing would be the terrible option huh?” Ilia rubbed her chin, putting critical thought into what her next moved to be. “I guess…”

xxxx

“You’re skipping out on tonight!?” Judy blurted out.

Ilia put her hand over the cops mouth to silence them. “Shhhh! Why are you being so loud!? I don’t think Dan wants to hear you from the kitchen!”

The waiter in question walked out with sparking mugs filled with coffee for the table of four. “Don’t worry, one more loudmouth doesn’t sound that much different from three.”

“Damn Daniel, you gonna shoot us like that? I thought we were friends? Especially after my tip.” Neptune said. He clenched his chest dramatically as if he was actually offended. Judy laughed.

“Wow goggles, couldn’t get it on with me last night so Dan got the tip instead? I respect that. Everyone’s head turned to Judy in shock, except Ilia. She slowly put her head down to cringe. How was her parole officer the least mature person here?

“Dan I think I need a little more caffeine in mine after dealing with that exhausting remark.”

“What if I put cream-” he cut himself off. He could see the corner of Judy’s lips start to turn up. “Sugar cubes, I’ll dump sugar cubes in yours.”

Ilia gave him a thumbs up and he went on his way. “As I was saying, I’m actually just going to stay home this time around. When the partying starts. A night to recuperate, have me time.” She took a long sip from her mug. It was hard to tell if it was the mental workout or the one in her home that had her tired. This caught Sun’s attention, along with her statement. He was pretty sure that this involved him. Good or bad, now that was a little bit harder to read, but he thought best not to pry. He could use a little me time as well.

“Okay, I hope it goes well.” He said. It caught Ilia a little off guard by the look she gave him. She wasn’t sure how he’d take that news most likely. Ilia smiled and nodded at him. Yeah, they were alright. That’s all Sun really needed to know.

“Did you two have sex?” Judy said, cutting back into the conversation the best way she knew how. Neptune choked on his coffee while Sun’s brain turned to static, an option that was safer than saying something he might regret. Ilia’s eyes looked like they were going to pop out of her head. Somehow she managed to maintain the usual color of her skin, but that didn’t stop the heat rising to her face.

“Judy!” She shouted, “Why would you say that!?”

The cop shrugged, “It’s a valid question. You look tired, both of you were together for who knows how long, and anything is possible.”

“He’s not my type.” Ilia could feel herself saying that a lot in the future. It was the truth, but it made her feel a little bit of an ass. Like she was dismissing Sun in an ugly way.

Judy wasn’t convinced though and for good reason. “Ilia I’m not your type either but that hasn’t stopped us from some crazy nights.” Judy saw everyone’s jaw drop.

Neptune had barely recovered from her earlier question. “I’m...I’m sorry, you two have slept together?” He coughed.

“Oh yeah, Ilia and go way back. Oh I could tell stories.”

“Which you won’t!” Ilia said, now blushing.

“Don’t be ashamed. I’m irresistible. You could only survive so much of my flirting. I had a way of pushing your buttons, along with flipping switches.”

Sun raised an eyebrow. “Switches?”

“What kind?” Neptune added.

“Can you not!?” Ilia felt like she was going to die. How did she surround herself with three people that constantly put her in weird situations. What made it worse was Sun being at the table!

Judy could tell how badly Ilia wanted this to stop. The opportunity was too good to pass up. “You’re looking pretty flushed. We’re all friends here.” Judy pointed to themself. “Some people enjoy cuffs and a good hair tug.” Judy rubbed her leg against Neptune’s to make him blush nervously. Hopefully he’d remember that. Judy shifted their eyes to Ilia and mumbled. “Others like their butt-”

Ilia covered Judy’s mouth so fast, the embarrassment too much to handle. She didn’t even attempt to look at Sun or Neptune, who clearly knew where that headed. Neptune looked at Sun with intrigued eyes. Sun could only blush and shake his head no. If Judy was paying attention then she would’ve noticed the silent confession to her question earlier.

“Why are you doing this to me?” Ilia asked

Judy looked at the girl’s hand, which was still on their face until it was removed to reveal a smile. “Easy, I like seeing you be so expressive. You’ve been so down on yourself and less colorful until recently. I don’t know what’s changed but I’m glad the Ilia that does community service then goes home to sleep is slowly going away. The white fang was bad, but it made you lively at least.”

That was more of an answer than Ilia expected. Had she been less lively? Sure she had gotten into a pretty boring routine, but topping organized crime is almost impossible. Most things are boring once you do that. Ilia scratched the back of her head. “Be that as it may, can you not bring up the past like that. I don’t air your dirty laundry.”

“Ilia, do you have clean laundry?” Judy chuckled.

“You…” It was hard arguing against the truth. “Stop picking on me! Why are you this exhausting?” Ilia deflated. Judy rubbed her back to comfort her as if she wasn’t the reason for this! “First you weaken me and now you’re building me up?”

“Lighten up. Say, if you aren’t going to the party tonight then let’s all go to the beach right now to have fun. A lot of people party hard so it should be less crowded.

“Can we do something inland?” Neptune asked politely. All he got was judgmental looks. “Y’all are so mean.”

“Nobody is making you get in the water dude.” Sun pointed out. “You will probably get wet by the end of this, but life be like that sometimes.”

“That doesn’t make me want to go!!!”

“The beach sounds nice.” Ilia said, thinking about the opportunity to relax on the sand. “I’m not changing into a swimsuit though.” Ilia has a feeling if Judy saw a possible hickey or bruise then more questions would be asked.

“Are you sure about that?” Judy smirked.

“Yes, I’m not wearing one.”

xxxx

“Do my choices mean nothing to you.” Ilia groaned, wearing a swimsuit. Judy had somehow got her to wear a black bikini with gold stitching. She had managed to wear a black cover up skirt that matched. It actually looked pretty nice, but Ilia wasn’t going to admit that. Judy was too busy having fun in her red two piece to notice Ilia had made her own skin a little darker to hide a hickey on her chest and shoulder. “Sun needs to stop biting so hard.” Ilia thought. It took a few minutes to register what she just thought. “Wait, why am I talking like there’s gonna be a next time!?”

“You okay?” Said the man in question. Sun wore navy blue swim trunks. The upside about always having your shirt open is your always beach ready. He sat next to Ilia on her beach towel as they watched Judy mess with Neptune, who was wearing red trunks.

“I’m fine. A little surprised that Neptune owns trunks.”

“Those are just my other pair. So, I don’t mean to pry…”

“I don’t want to talk about my kinks.” She blushed.

“What? I was gonna talk about skipping the party.”

“Oh… right.” She wanted to kick herself. “Forget what I just said.”

“Okay.”

“I’m serious! We are never discussing that, Sun Wukong. So don’t get any weird ideas.” Ilia elbowed him.

“You told me not to go down on you. If that’s the line then in what world do I get to crazier stuff.”

“That’s fair. Yeah I think it is best to spend some time alone later tonight. No offense to you or anything but-”

“I get it. Take your time.” Sun laid on his back and closed his eyes to enjoy the rays.

“Will do, thanks.” Ilia noticed just how calm he was about most of this. It made her a little envious honestly. “You’re taking this well.”

“Am I? I might look like it, but I feel a little anxious. Even now. Is that normal?”

“You are asking the wrong girl. Normal has never applied to me in any part of my life. That’s on me though.”

“Crime is the spice of life.”

“Is that how you justify stealing?”

“Hehe, maybe. You should try it.” He joked.

“I did, your virginity.” Ilia looked down to see Sun look at her with the most ‘why are you like this’ look ever. She couldn’t help but laugh, which made him smile.

“This is nice.” He sat up. “I like our talks.”

“Yeah, me too. Who would’ve thought you’d be good at conversations?”

“Uhh me?” Sun bluntly stated, pointing to himself. “Remember, I’m the one who kicked Blake back into high spirits! My positivity is infectious!”

“Let’s hope that’s the only infectious thing.”

“Wh-you literally just mentioned taking my-”

“Hey you two!”

A voice cut him off from behind. Sun and Ilia turned around and had their sunny moment get a little dimmer. Blake and Yang stood with beach gear and in bikinis. Each wearing the other’s color. “Fancy seeing you two here.” Yang cheerfully said.

“Mind if we join you?” Blake smiled, genuinely happy to see two of her favorite people. “We haven’t spent time together yet.”

The pair of confused friends looked at each other, then back at Blake and Yang. No time like the present. They could only avoid things for so long. Ilia tensed up a little but was jolted out of it the moment Sun’s tail discreetly rubbed her ankle. It was oddly tension releasing.

“Sure.” She nodded, “let’s chat.”

Part 11

#rwby #rwby sunshower #rwby sunspots #kali belladonna #blake belladonna #yang xiao long #neptune vasilias #sun wukong #ilia amitola #sun x ilia #rwby au

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ellewritesathing · 5 years ago

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Faking It - V

Summary: You’d done plenty of dumb things in your life, but the dumbest had to be picking Greendale’s latest bad-boy to pretend to be your boyfriend.

Masterlist Prev. | Part 5

Word-count: 2.6k+

A/N: ... so that was some rough stuff. i hope this makes up for it!! 💕

Considering that your relationship with Caliban had been entirely fake from the start, you had no reason to be as pissed off about it ending as you were. But there you were: lonely and pissed off, with all the little trinkets he’d ever given you surrounding where you were moping on your bedroom floor.

The flower he’d picked from the field and put in your hair? In the shoebox. The ticket stubs from the first movie you’d seen together? In the shoebox. The detention slip you’d gotten when you cut class together that he’d written and drawn all over? In the shoebox. Any and all feelings towards him? In the goddamn shoe box.

Despite the progress you were making with trashing your room, you and your brooding were interrupted by someone knocking at your window. You pretended not to notice Harvey perched haphazardly on your window sill and started heading out to the hall when Sabrina stepped out to block you. For a tiny person, she could be pretty intimidating when popping out of the shadows like that.

“Open the window,” she said.

“You can’t tell me what to do. This is my house.”

“Your house is going to have a dead body out front if you let Harvey dangle out there for another five minutes. He’s not exactly well coordinated.”

You rolled your eyes before walking over and throwing the window open. Harvey swore as he climbed through and you walked over to flop on your bed. As you settled on your bed, Sabrina dusted Harvey off and checked that he was okay - a very small action that made you feel sick given your very recent single status.

“So what do the two of you want?” you asked. They looked awkwardly at each other and you rolled your eyes. “Come on, you ambushed me in my bedroom. You want something. Spit it out.”

“It’s not that we want something,” Sabrina said, gingerly making her way over to your bed. She made a spot for herself among all the junk you had piled high around her. “We just wanted to check on you. It’s been a while since anyone saw you.”

“It’s been a day, first of all.” You waved your finger around as you spoke. “And second of all, that still means you still want something.”

Harvey mumbled your name and sat on the bed right next to you, forcing you over to the side of the bed with the junk if you didn’t want to be crushed. “Come on. Just tell us what’s going on with you.”

“Harvey, you were there,” you said. “Both of you were there. You know what’s going on.”

“Caliban never told us what happened. He left right after you did,” Sabrina said.

Did he try to come after you? His car was a lot faster than yours so he would've-

“Did something happen with Lucy?”

You scoffed and took something out of the junk pile to fiddle with. Did something happen with Lucy? I don’t Brina, what was your first clue?

“Yeah, something happened with Lucy,” you said instead of snapping. “They were making out and I caught them. The cycle of bullshit continues.”

“Oh, Y/N,” Sabrina said softly.

At the same time, Harvey got awkward next to you as he reached for your hand. “I know how you feel,” he said with a small smile. “Fucking sucks.”

You laughed and pulled yourself up to hug him. The two of you had been through a lot together, but this was by far the weirdest thing yet. You had the lucky experience of being heartbroken over the same two people kissing, how many best friends could say that?

“Okay, you two, stop moping,” Sabrina said as she got up. “We’re going out. You, get dressed. You, help me get Roz and Theo.”

“I’m not leaving the house until I absolutely have to. My plans are to burn that box and watch 10 Things I Hate About You so I can cry over Heath Ledger.”

And not Caliban.

“Fine, then we’ll have a movie night!” Harvey said. He sounded too cheery at the thought of being cooped up in the house with you. “Then you don’t even have to get changed, but, uh, you are starting to smell, so maybe you should.”

“Harvey, so help me God-”

After taking a shower and getting into fresh sweats, you spent the rest of the long weekend curled up with your friends under a mountain of blankets and eating so much junk food that your stomach hurt. Despite your determination to be in a bad mood, spending this much time with them got you to stop thinking about Caliban and lifted your spirits.

It was still awkward whenever one of them would slip up and mention him before turning very quickly to check that you weren’t going to burst into tears, but it got better. Roz braided your hair and Theo distracted you by telling you all about this kid named Robin that he met. It was the best post-breakup hangout you guys had had yet.

That perfect little bubble of denial burst when you got into the car to drive yourself to school and found Caliban’s jacket waiting for you in the passenger seat. He’d left it thereafter you convinced him to let you drive him home after one of his boring baseball games.

Once you got to school, you gathered the jacket and everything else you wanted to return and stomped over to Caliban’s locker. He looked a lot more like the pissed off wannabe Abercrombie & Fitch model you met those months ago and less like the softer version of Caliban you’d come to know. You didn’t know if it made you sadder or feel pettily vindicated.

You faked a sweet smile at him when he closed the door and saw you standing there. “Here’s all your crap.”

Caliban looked down at the box and took it without anything more than a thank you. But even if he didn’t say anything else, he didn’t make any attempts to walk away. He just stood there, looking at you with those confusing eyes. Was he trying to say something? Trying to figure out how you felt?

Whatever he was doing, you didn’t want any part of it. You mumbled a goodbye before shaking your head and turning to walk away.

“So that’s it?” he asked. Caliban hadn’t moved an inch when you turned around but he looked … sadder, less angry somehow. Still confusing.

“What do you want me to say?” you asked. “That we both knew this was a bad idea from the start? That I’m the idiot who got emotionally attached? Something like that, Caliban?”

“Emotionally attached?” Caliban repeated.

The bell rang before you could curse him out, so you decided to listen to divine intervention for once in your life and just walked away. Every step you took broke your heart a little more because the sound of your shoes hitting the ground reminded you that he was never going to come after you.

---

A week passed and he still hadn’t come after you. It made being at school remarkably awkward given how your friends had attached to him, but you pushed through it. Until Harvey ambushed you. Meet him by the locker room after practice and you’d get lunch, he said. Bullshit.

It was suspicious enough that he wanted you to wait for him by the locker room and even more so when it took him twenty minutes to change, but you let it slide. What you wouldn’t let slide, however, was when you came out of the restaurant bathroom and Caliban was seated across from Harvey. In your spot.

“What the hell is going on here?” you asked, stopping in front of the table and pointing an accusatory finger at Harvey and then at Caliban. “You hate him.”

“Yeah, but you don’t,” Harvey said, getting up to stop you from bolting out the door. “Just hear me out, okay?”

“After this, I don’t think I’m listening to you ever again unless it’s to make fun of you,” you said. All your snark aside, you let Harvey guide you into a seat. But then he just sat there, looking nervous and unsure about the situation while you grew restless. “So are you going to say anything?”

“Yeah. Yeah, totally,” Harvey said. He leaned closer and looked down for a second as he strung his thoughts together. “You guys have been huge downers since you broke up. You’re moping all the time and listening to sad music and you’re racing and getting into fights-”

“You’re fighting again?” you asked, knitting your face together slightly as you looked at him.

Caliban had told you bits and pieces about his fighting. He had anger issues as a kid so he’d always been in some kind of contact sport. Between that training and the bullying, he’d learned how to be a pretty decent fighter. And then he got old enough to get a believable fake ID and start fighting underground. God knows he didn’t need the money, but you had the feeling it was the only way he felt anything other than angry and empty.

“Not like that,” Caliban said quietly, looking at you for a moment before returning his attention to Harvey.

Liar.

“Yeah, well, whatever,” Harvey said, skipping over all the tension. “Point is: You were annoying when you were dating, but it’s even worse when you’re not. Just talk it through, alright? Please?”

You shrugged and Harvey went on for a few more awkward minutes before getting up and telling you he’d be waiting in the car for you. The restaurant felt suffocatingly silent without him, but you didn’t know what to say and Caliban wasn’t exactly known for his emotional vulnerability.

So you used this quiet time to think about how you’d paint this scene: You on one side of the table, muted colors and soft lines making you up but reds and oranges all around you, and Caliban on the other made up in harsh, black and white lines and blues surrounding him. You’d call it Starcross’d. Fake your death and sell it for thousands on the black market.

It was the perfect plan, really, if it weren’t for those perfectly imperfect hands on the table. Calluses were starting to form on the undersides that you could only partially see, the knuckles were slightly swollen and red, and his boney fingers tapped the table absent-mindedly as he thought. All you wanted to do was reach out and hold them, a quality you could never capture on canvas. It fucked up your painting just like he fucked up everything else.

“I’m not sure where to start,” Caliban said quietly. You’d been so busy staring at his hands that you hadn’t noticed him staring at you until you looked up. “I’ve never had this kind of relationship with someone, fake or not. It’s all very confusing.”

That made you laugh a short and bitter laugh as you straightened up in your seat. “Yeah, tell me about it.”

Caliban smiled slightly but there was something else there. He was nervous. “I’m not very good at this.”

“Try.”

He took a breath and shifted in his chair, drawing his hands in and tapping them one more time. “This meant more to me than I expected it to,” Caliban said. “I thought it would be fun for a week or so to mess with Billy, and then when Harvey got so mad at me … He was talking to me again. I gave it another week.”

“Are you trying to tell me that you only liked me because it made Harvey mad?”

“That’s not what I meant.” Caliban sighed and mumbled under his breath about not being good at this. “What I meant is that I like you because you’re the only liar I’ve ever met who can’t throw a punch. You’re funny, and smart, and insanely competitive in a way that doesn’t make me care if I lose,” he said with a short laugh. “And you showed me that Harvey would still talk to me if I didn’t piss him off.”

He looked annoyingly sincere as he spoke with his eyes avoiding yours. As much as you wanted to believe him, you weren’t sure you could open yourself up to him and his bullshit again.

“Let’s say I believe you - which I don’t - then why did you lie about you and Lucy?”

“I never lied about her,” Caliban said, careful to keep calm. He looked like he was straining to keep his voice even, clearly uncomfortable with talking about himself. “Lucinda was my best friend - my only friend - for many years but she can be … possessive. I went up to explain to her that I couldn’t do it again and tell her that I thought she should leave. She didn’t handle the rejection too well.”

“It didn’t look like a rejection from where I was standing,” you mumbled.

“I know, and I’m sorry. Truly,” Caliban said, almost reaching across to you. He took a breath and pulled his hand back. “She kissed me and I panicked like a stupid twelve-year-old boy. You caught the wrong end of it and I just thought … you deserved so much better than me anyway. If you wanted to leave, I wasn’t going to be the one to hold you back.”

“Bullshit.” You leaned forward and got close enough that he had to take his eyes off his hand and look at you. Your voice was harsher than you meant it to be, but you were still so angry at him. “You didn’t stop me because you were scared, not because you’re some noble knight.”

“Don’t you get it?” Caliban asked, his voice just as harsh as yours. “That’s the point. I didn’t come after you because that’s not who I am. I am not a noble knight. I’m not the person you deserve.”

“You don’t get to make decisions about what I deserve,” you said. You were close enough to him still that you could almost feel him breathing. It made your heartbeat annoyingly fast.

“I should. You might end up with a good guy,” Caliban said quietly, dropping his eyes to his hands again. They were close to your own now that you’d gotten all up in his face, but he wasn’t moving them any closer.

“Believe it or not, I still think you’re a good guy,” you said, voice just as quiet. “I’m just not sure if I … I don’t know if I can do this again. All the lying and secret-keeping.” Caliban started pulling away and saying something but you grabbed hold of his hand. “So if we do this again-” you said, talking over his arguing “-Then we do it for real. No more lying from either of us.”

Caliban took a breath as he adjusted to the new position the two of you were in. He started untangling one of his hands and you held tighter before he tilted his head slightly and pulled his hand free. He lifted it to move some hair out of your face.

“I never lied to you.”

“Then you’ve got nothing to lose,” you said with a small smile.

He shook his head and smiled to himself as he looked down at the table. “Are you sure you want to do this again?”

Honestly, no. The only thing you were sure about was that your life kind of sucked without that pissed off Abercrombie & Fitch model.

That, and if you ever saw Lucy again you’d knock her teeth out.

“Well, it’s either you or Billy, and I fucking hate Billy,” you said.

At least he laughed at your joke, that was progress.

“Alright,” Caliban said eventually. He still seemed sad but he was calmer as he looked back up at you. “But you need to let me make this up to you before anything else.”

You smiled. “I’m sure you’ll figure something out, Abercrombie. And you know where to find me when you do.”

Tagged: @t-a-i-l-o-r-m-a-d-e @miss--moose @marrypuffsstuff @harryscarolinaa @igorsbby @foji2000 @mschfavngz @artaxerxesthegreat @thxmagic @strawberriesandknives @xealia @hotmessindisguise @acciomaximoff @reheated-coffee @shelby-x @perseny-blog @millie-753 @luneerius @shizzybarnaclee @lettherebelovex @throughparisallthroughrome @ietss @thebookwormlife @mechanicalanimalz @mariamermaid @nqbmf @caliban-is-my-girl @music-movies @luquincy @olivia-west-allen @drrramaaaqweeen @roxytheimmortal Struck through wouldn’t tag

#caliban #caliban imagine #caliban x reader #faking it #caos #chilling adventures of sabrina

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bubbyyerrr · 4 years ago

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Broken Bow and Hochatown

5 Senses

Audio Reading: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1PT2nvmg6Rn5rwvz6lqsgjeFvF_iRNzVz/view?usp=drivesdk

Broken Bow and Hochatown look like a run-down Hallmark representation of a small town in the country. There are trees and wildlife everywhere and the lake and rivers are clear and (for the most part) free of pollution. The scenery changes a bit when hundreds of tourists crowd the one road and every camping spot along the lake, but they all seek the same middle-of-nowhere getaway. The smell of Broken Bow- pine trees mixed with lake water and grills- persists through tourism's popularity.

Broken Bow feels like a hot, sticky air constantly surrounding you and eventually being cleared by the breeze being carried above the soft waves of the lake. It feels like the first breath of fresh air when you step through the door of your home after a long workday. It sounds like high schoolers’ trucks with enlarged mufflers black-smoking and letting everybody in the neighborhood know that they have arrived. Broken Bow sounds like the warm hellos of a people that have known each other their whole lives because it seem like everybody here has.

Broken Bow tastes like a confusing amount of Tex-Mex mixed with fast food and the occasional good burger. It tastes like local coffee beans and homemade ice cream. Broken Bow encapsulates the full feeling of a summertime feel good movie. The sights, smells, sounds, tastes, and feelings are all quite familiar to me, to the point where I have taken them each for granted. It feels of something unique and treasured by many for its beauty in the small things.

My Love for the Small Town

My experience with Broken Bow and Hochatown is substantial, seeing as I have lived there for the majority of my life. The irony is that I had to leave for college to realize its significance and impact on my life. In high school I was more than a little frustrated with my place of living. The “city” of Broken Bow had nothing for teenagers to do throughout the year. I wanted a bowling alley, a laser tag arena, a coffee shop, or anything else that a bigger city had. In high school, my friends and I would go to a parking lot adjacent to the Wal-Mart parking lot and sit in one person’s car and listen to music and talk. If we were not spending the night and playing video games, then this was our next best option in our eyes.

I suppose there is a charm to its uniqueness, but I was quite blind to it having only experienced its lack of activities compared to other places. Teenagers of Broken Bow have it easy now. There are two coffee shops and a bowling alley is coming to Hochatown, I would not be at all surprised if a laser tag arena was soon to follow! I am quite happy with it, despite my obvious previous frustrations, however. I now experience it in mediation as a place to escape, as many many others have.

Sustain the Environment

Broken Bow and Hochatown should be preserved as an escape to pure nature with minimalized pollutants in the water and air. My hope is that every tourist that visits would share my view and take care of the environment of the small town. People visit this place because of the clear water and sense of peace with being surrounded by nature, and if that were to be ruined or contaminated, people would come here less and drastically decrease the business that the town has thrived from. The State Park of Beaver’s Bend is well protected, but I encourage anyone staying in cabins or camping to treat the nature around you kindly so that it may continue to welcome others who visit.

Come Visit you City Slickers

I would encourage anybody that has never been to Broken Bow/Hochatown to visit with a plan of activities for each day. Floating the river is a very popular choice among tourists and locals, and there are plenty of canoe and kayak rental places that will take you to the river and pick you up when you have finished your route. It is a great way to spend the day in the sun and water and encourages little competitions among families and friends or a peaceful journey for the lone wolf types. I would encourage newcomers to the area to come in with a fresh conviction to take a step away from staring at screens all the time. Beauty is not found in the lens of a camera but the purity of the moment captured by not only the sight but the sounds and feelings of the moment.

Source: https://www.vrbo.com/vacation-rentals/usa/oklahoma/broken-bow?noDates=true&k_clickid=CjwKCAjwuvmHBhAxEiwAWAYj-KvnJaKnEyvEjDVLuL5DySkqXXfVUSPAfUCi1V3-TquPPPTnJW-GCRoCFacQAvD_BwE&ds_cid=71700000080047762&ds_kids=p60860309934&ds_kid=39700060860309934&ksprof_id=700000002166899&ksdevice=c&ktarget=dsa-1183032255545&kloct=&klocf=9026684&ds_aid=58700006721571344&ha_t=:g:&gclid=CjwKCAjwuvmHBhAxEiwAWAYj-KvnJaKnEyvEjDVLuL5DySkqXXfVUSPAfUCi1V3-TquPPPTnJW-GCRoCFacQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

Covid Changes to Broken Bow

Whenever the pandemic hit, Broken Bow initially followed a soft lockdown and the majority of residents did not leave their homes as frequently. After a few people got it and got over it, however, this changed for the entire town. Many people ceased to take it seriously or their view of the virus became “If I get it I get it”.

Broken Bow and Beaver's Bend are located in an overwhelmingly conservative area of the United States. With that being said, you can imagine that many things did not change in Broken Bow for the most part. Our Wal-Mart asked people to wear masks, but they were ignored, and no employees enforced the mask policy or social distancing. While the franchise restaurants, excluding two, stayed the same and flourished from drive-thru and delivery experiences, the “Mom and Pop” restaurants were hit quite hard by the initial drop in business. One of our biggest, most-frequented restaurants in town, Papa Poblanos, was heavily impacted at first, but they introduced an “Order Online” option that brought a significant chunk of their revenue back to normal.

As the virus progressed and calmed down, tourism has spiked back almost as intensely as it dropped. The cabin businesses faired very well, as did all of the attractions in Hochatown. Every store and restaurant you go to, it is quite easy to point out who is a tourist and who is a local based on who has a mask and who does not. Throughout the rise and fall of the virus, Broken Bow has managed to maintain an optimistic attitude, and gives tourists from all over a safe haven to escape.

All of the following photos are from Broken Bow photographer, Matt Cameron. Matt has done photography for multiple cabins and the other photos are of Broken Bow lake, Mountain Fork River and a mountain in the Broken Bow area. Each photo is from his account on instagram, @cameronphotography.ok Link: https://www.instagram.com/cameronphotography.ok/

Now that you’ve been Convinced

1. Prepare your budget. You should not worry about money on your vacation/detox so save money where you can, to enjoy it later.

2. Gather your party. Do you have a group of people or your family that you’d love to escape with? If you’re going alone, this step is significantly less important.

3. Prepare your mind and body for a change by adapting sleep and thought patterns. It can be very difficult to not think about work or other things while vacationing, so prepare yourself.

4. Let people know ahead of time that you will not be on your phone as much (hopefully not at all).

5. Look for the perfect place to stay. There are hundreds of cabins in Broken Bow, so find one you love!

6. Reach out to the cabin booking services and talk about your favorite place. Get a good relationship with them so if you need anything while there, they can oblige easily.

7. Look into possible activities that you think you might enjoy. While there is some awesome stuff to do here, you may not be able to do it all, so prioritize as much as possible!

8. Plan out your days ahead of time. Make an itinerary if wanted, but do not be too strict with the timelines.

9. Pack well! Your vacation is almost here, but do not get too overzealous and forget something. Make a list ahead of time and add on as the time gets closer.

10. Make a banger playlist. No trip is complete without tunes to jam to. That road anticipation can be alleviated with some sick beats.

11. Practice your most hick accent on the way. This step is crucial.

12. As you arrive, just throw your bags on the bed and go eat! Get some experience and good food on the first day. My highest of recommendations to Grateful Head.

13. Get that phone out of here! You will ruin it in all the water around here anyways!

14. Enjoy every moment of the day. If you need a nap, take it. If you want a snack, you deserve it. Stick to the itinerary, but if something goes off schedule, that is okay! That is why you prioritized!

15. Take a walk or a few out in nature before you go. You can take some time away from the constant distractions from everyday life and actually think in the sounds of nature. A vacation is nothing without a proper detox.

My blog over Broken Bow was an interesting one. I have written about my hometown before but never in this capacity and to this magnitude. My focus on the hometown and not so much the important events of my life in them was strange but welcome. My blog served as an homage to the place I grew up, even though I have not been overly fond of it. It became an appreciation of the roots of my parents and grandparents.

The colors used on my blog were the default colors of Tumblr. I am not sure how customizable the layout of blogs on Tumblr are. The pictures I used that I am proud of are the pictures of Matt Cameron, a wonderful photographer friend of mine. I wanted my blog to reflect a familiar place of peace that you could go to to collect your thoughts. The audience for my blog is people who have never visited Broken Bow or Hochatown before.

I put my blog together just assignment by assignment as I went through them. I feel it is strong in capturing the beauty of a small town getaway. The blog does not accurately depict the frustrations of limited activities there. I could relate the blog to my college career because of the surprising amount of musically talented people in Broken Bow. It honestly does not have much to relate to apart from the musically inclined people there.

This post was for Dr. Hembrough’s ENG 3903 course.

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sayakas-dr-imagines · 5 years ago

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Hello! May I request Hiyoko and Mahiru with an fem s/o who is a reserve course student? Thank you! (Some angst would be nice :3)

AI don’t know a lot about the reserve course, so this was challenging. I tried though, and I hope you like it nonetheless!

- Mod Sayaka

Mahiru Koizumi and Hiyoko Saionji With A Fem S/O Who Is In The Reserve Course!

Mahiru Koizumi

- You have always been interested in photography ever since you were a child. Despite having no desire to actually participate, you decided to learn as much as you could, and become as experienced as possible just in case your view changed when you were older.

- Due to this, Mahiru had been your friend well before she was scouted to attend Hope’s Peak. At first it was just a nice little routine, you would visit her, and she would talk to you about photography, with you either telling her facts of your own or taking small mental notes.

- But then it evolved into talking about more things - other likes, dislikes, and even home life. She would talk, and you would listen. You would talk, and she would listen. It was nice. All of the memories you two had together are nice to look back on in the end.

- The time you two were spending together gradually increased overtime, and then it became daily for you two to run off, and try to find places to take photos. You were always able to help with angles and were always honest with how you felt about her pictures. She appreciated that.

- She always told you that even if somebody isn’t an ultimate, she believes that they can still take a talent and build a career on it, just like any other ultimate could. That was always your motivation in life.

- But when Mahiru was scouted by Hope’s Peak Academy, you were ecstatic. Of course, neither of you wanted to have to leave each other, but your thought process was that “as long as one of us achieve our dream, then none of us can lose, right?”

- Mahiru never approved of this thought process of yours. She said that it’s only a win for her if we both turn out to have successful careers in things we want to do. You knew that she was right, but by sticking to the same idea that you always have, you were trying to convince yourself just as much as you were trying to convince her.

- And you thought that as long as you stuck to it and pretended to believe your own words, eventually you would genuinely start to believe it. But your mind doesn’t change so easily.

- The truth is, you were horribly upset that she was scouted to attend Hope’s Peak. You felt happy for her, you were so happy that she finally has the chance to achieve her dream - but at the same time, if she does achieve that dream, then what will happen to that duo you grew up with? Will you be forgotten?

- You were eventually confident enough to be vocal with these concerns and told Mahiru you were worried. She was thankfully very understanding, and made a mutual promise that we would never forget about each other.

- Despite this promise, you were still nervous. You didn’t want to grow apart - you wanted to stay together.

- That’s why, when your parents agreed to pay the fee to let you be a reserve course student, you were so excited. Your first instinct was to tell Mahiru, and she had a similar reaction to yours.

- “That’s amazing, S/O!” She wrapped her arms around you and pulled you close, and you did the same. You didn’t even realise what you were saying, or doing. It just slipped out.

- “I love you Mahiru.” There was a moment of silence between you two, before she finally broke the agonising silence with her own words.

- “I love you too.”

- You two made a solemn promise to each other that those feelings would never change. That your relationship would never change into something more unappealing, or something unhealthy.

- You promised each other. And in your entire life, all of the promises you’ve made with Mahiru have never been broken. Never before have you ever had a reason to be suspicious of her breaking a promise - because you trusted her with your life.

- “Mahiru?” Until now. The redhead in question wasn’t responding to your texts, and she was never around you in school. You hadn’t seen her for a while, so you thought she was sick. But then you saw her with a group of people you didn’t know.

- She spun around, and looked almost shocked to see your face. The group of people were confused. They were obviously ultimates - they all had that aura around them of their personality and general presence. Something you and a lot of other reserve course students lacked.

- “S/O, hi.”

- “Mahiru, who’s this?” One of the girls asked. She looked unwelcoming, and her aura had a sort of “leave here, and never come back” feeling to it.

- Mahiru, supposedly in her panic, turned back around and said, “Nobody. Anyway-” You didn’t cut her off, but you tuned her out. Nobody? These new friends of hers didn’t even know who you were, and now she wasn’t even going to bother to introduce you, or give you the chance to introduce yourself?

- Your body was moving on its own at this point. You grabbed her hand and pulled her away to another area - not far away enough to not be in public, but far away enough for her to basically be inclined to speak to you.

- “S/O! What are you doing? Jeez, I’m just trying to talk to my friends.”

- “I get that,” you say. Your face must be red from anger at this point, you think. “But I’m your friend, too! And you’re not even going to bother to say “oh, yeah, that’s S/O”, I mean, c’mon, Mahiru!”

- Mahiru looked almost offended at that comment. “S/O. I swear, I’ve finally made some more friends, and you can’t even be happy for me?”

- “I can’t even be happy for you? What the hell do you mean?” You have to stop yourself from yelling. “You’ve been refusing to talk to me or be anywhere near me for the past few days!”

- “Well maybe I want some friends who actually have talent.”

- She seemed to cut herself off after that, looking terrified of what just escaped her mouth. She slapped a hand over her mouth and her eyes brimmed with tears, as did yours. “Wait, S/O- I didn’t mean it. I swear.”

- “No, Mahiru... Just don’t.” You turn around, wiping your tears away as you run off to any secluded place you can use to cry without anybody bothering you. Nobody could see you in this state - absolutely nobody.

- Because even if they did, they wouldn’t care, right? I mean... who would care about somebody who doesn’t even have any real talent?

- You look up, and see the mountains that you told Mahiru to take a quick picture of as a memento a few months ago, and can’t help but feel sick.

Hiyoko Saionji

- Just like Mahiru, you two had the fortune of growing up together. Back when she was younger, she was far more trusting than she is now. You knew about her misfortune from a very early age, so you were always her shoulder to cry on whenever she felt like she needed help.

- You two were the perfect duo - you being a perfect balance to her mischievous and childish behaviour. She often referred to you as “big sis” when you two grew older, and she stuck to you like glue.

- Whenever she felt upset or threatened in any way, she usually ran to her father as support. But if by chance her father wasn’t around and you were, she’d immediately go to you for any sort of help you could give her.

- She was always very protective of you. She believed that because you were her friend and you grew up together, that you deserve the same treatment that she deserves, which is to be treated as a superior. You never agreed with her on this, but there is no arguing with her. You learned that a while ago, and the hard way too.

- You two were simply jumping around, with her babbling on about whatever nonsense crossed her mind. You joyfully listened, and then stopped yourself when she mentioned something about both of you being higher-ups in the world, and with both of you deserving to be treated like royalty.

- You told her that you weren’t royalty though, and that although you would be okay with Hiyoko being treated like a princess, you just want to be known as a normal girl with a normal backstory.

- She cried. Loud. She threw a tantrum until you took it back, and said that you should be treated as a superior too. Ever since that day, you learned to just go along with what she things is right, because it’s not worth the heartbreak of hearing her wails.

- Hiyoko believes wholeheartedly that you are just as talented as her - even if you aren’t an ultimate. She says that whoever doesn’t think so should go back to the pig den where they belong, since obviously they escaped there a few years ago.

- You were always there to protect her from people who made her cry out of nowhere, even if she was actually being nice to them for once. This led to assumptions being made about you. People began to spread rumours that you were just as bad as Hiyoko.

- You didn’t care, and continued to defend Hiyoko with your life. She was simply misunderstood, right? She would never turn on you. She would never turn on anybody she truly cares about.

- When Hiyoko was scouted by Hope’s Peak Academy, she wasn’t happy. Rather, she was upset that you wouldn’t be there with her - protecting her, helping her. You reassured her that she’d be fine without you, but it’d be a cold day in hell before she believes that.

- She would constantly whine about having to be alone in a whole new area without her best friend, without the one person she could turn to other than her father.

- So in order to make her happy, you convinced your parents to pay the fee. It took my begging, whining and compromising, but eventually, they caved, and paid the fee to allow you to be in the reserve course with some other students just like you.

- “Hey, Hiyoko! I have something to tell you.” You tapped her on the shoulder, and she turned around. Upon seeing you, her face lit up like a small child.

- “Oh hey! It better be good news!” She smiled, looking up at you with excitement. She really did remind you of a child sometimes. Not just her looks, but her attitude and overall aura was that of a small child’s.

- You nodded. “It is- I got into the reserve course.” She immediately threw herself at you, wrapped her arms around your midsection.

- “Yes! I knew it - you’ll will be with me forever!” Hiyoko sounded so amazingly happy that you got into the reserve course, and so you couldn’t help but hug back.

- “Of course we wi-”

- “I love you, S/O!”

- There was a moment of awkward silence between you two, before Hiyoko desperately tried to cover up her tracks by going back on the statement. “No- no, I mean like... y’know...”

- “I love you too, Hiyoko.” You smiled fondly down at her. She grew silent. The silence this time was far from awkward, it was in fact, a very comfortable silence. A comforting quiet, a nice change from the usual ruckus that happens whenever you’re around Hiyoko.

- “Yeah. Yeah, love you, S/O.”

- That was the happiest day of your life. Where you were both finally able to confess your feelings for each other, and also the day where you confirmed that you would be going to the same school as her.

- But little did you know, that going to the same school would be the root of both of your issues. It was your dream, and Hiyoko’s, for the longest time. But neither of you anticipated that your shared dream could cause the biggest nightmare of your lives.

- “Go away, you fat pig!” Hiyoko spat, stepping in front of you. You were having a civil conversation with Mikan, and apparently, Hiyoko wasn’t very pleased with this.

- “I-I’m sorry! S-so s-sorry!” Mikan hurried away, around the corner. Hiyoko huffed, pleased with herself, and turned back to face you.

- “We were just talking, Hiyoko.”

- “Yeah, well why were you talking with that useless bitch instead of me? You said you love me, remember? So why don’t you spend time with me?” Hiyoko whined, stomping her foot down.

- “I do spend time with you, Hiyoko! But sometimes I want to hang around with my other friends, too-”

- “Oh, yeah, riiiiight. What kinda moron would willingly be around a reserve course student?”

- She seemed to not notice what she said for a few seconds, because it took her a moment to look just as taken aback as you did.

- “Apparently you’re the kind of moron that would, Hiyoko.” You turn away, your eyes stinging with the unwanted tears that threatened to spill at any moment.

- “W-wait!”

- You hastily walked away. There was no point in hiding anymore - your tears were already flowing down your cheeks, showing no sign of stopping.

- Nobody asked what was wrong. Nobody even gave you a passing glance.

- Of course they didn’t. After all, what kind of moron would willingly be around a reserve course student?

#i hope this was alright #danganronpa #hiyoko saionji #hiyoko saionji imagines #hiyoko saionji x reader #mahiru koizumi #mahiru koizumi imagines #mahiru koizumi x reader #dr #sdr2 #danganronpa goodbye despair #sdr2 imagines #danganronpa imagines #dr imagines #imagines #imagine #mod sayaka

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petra-deserved-better · 5 years ago

Note

Rivetra fantasy request ? :)

The Dragon Slayer

Fantasy AU

1751 words

Levi Ackerman/Petra Ral

————————————————————————

The small town of Paradis had been plagued by dragons for years. The people who lived there had tried everything, every spell, every charm, every curse that was available, mountains of gold had been lost to knights who had claimed they could slay dragons- they rode off in glory but they never came back.

Eventually it became a way of life for the towns people, they learned to live with the attacks, learned to anticipate them. They built shelters in their gardens and on street corners, you were never more than a few feet from somewhere to hide when you heard a roar or saw smoke and fire in the sky. So the casualties became fewer and farther in between but never gone completely. Children were born who knew nothing but a life where you could be snatched by a dragon at any moment. Death stalked them like an old friend. Everyone knew someone who had died.

Then came the day it all changed. No one knew where they came from, there had never been an attack like it before. There were so many dragons that filled the sky at once. Before long half the towns people had been devoured. Then as suddenly as it began the attack stopped. From that day onwards there were no more attacks. Years passed. The people were scarred and bruised from the fateful day but with each year that passed without so much as a dragon sighting they learned to live without fear. A whole generation of children grew up into young adults who barely remembered what a dragon looked like and only knew of them from the stories. Many of them had lost parents but they could barely remember the creatures that had stolen them.

Then almost ten years to the day of the last attack the dragons returned. They stole away the most beloved girl in the town, Petra Ral. She had lost her entire family in the last dragon attack, she was only thirteen years old but she’d devoted herself to caring for the rest of the orphans who were left behind. She had been walking in the town square when a dragon came and scooped her up where she stood and dragged her off, her legs dangling as it held her in its claws. It was the dragons first mistake, the fear the older townspeople had forgotten returned but the orphans who had known nothing but Petra’s care as they had grown felt only rage. They who had become young adults without parents because of the dragons but had spent most of their life not living in fear of them decided that enough was enough. They set out to find the one person who could help them, Levi Ackerman the dragon slayer.

He arrived three days after they had sent word to him. He rode into town on a black horse. He was dressed in black from head to toe. Two long swords were sheathed on his back, his face bore a scar the whole way down it’s left hand side. It was the closest a dragon had ever come to beating him, the head of the beast that caused the scar was mounted on the dragon slayers wall. At least that was what the legends said Armin had whispered to his friend Eren as they had watched him approach.

Eren raced forwards before the slayer had even had time to dismount from his horse.

“Are the stories about you true?” He cried, his brow furrowed in fury, his finger pointed at Levi in accusation. “Can you really defeat the dragon!”.

Levi eyed the boy carefully. He was used to meeting with hysteria, after all the nature of his job meant that he followed tragedy in its wake. The people who called him were desperate and down trodden.

“Yes,” he replied swinging down from his horse and handing the reins to the impetuous boy. ”But first you’ll tend to my horse. Then I will need all the details of the dragons you wish defeated, and I mean every detail. And finally I need several glasses of the best ale your town serves.”

It was an hour later that he sat drinking his third glass of ale which was, surprisingly not bad, served to him by a talkative girl named Sasha. The townspeople has taken time each telling him stories of the beasts that had blighted their existence. Two things stood out to him, the girl the dragons had taken on their last attack was important to most of them, Petra, it seemed was beloved in the village, secondly they were all mostly convinced that she was still alive.

“You see, they always eat their pray straight away.” The young boy Armin explained, looking across at Levi with earnest blue eyes. “But not this time, it scooped her up where she stood and flew her away. We know it didn’t eat her then so there’s a chance she’s still alive, you need to finder her. Please sir. She practically raised us, all of us here lost parents to the dragons.”

Levi sighed, he knew the chances of this girl being alive were slim to none, but looking at this group of kids he didn’t quite have the heart to tell them that yet. Let them have hope until he brought back the beasts heads. It wouldn’t bring their beloved friend back but it might soften the blow to know that her death had been avenged. He’d play along for now.

“Describe the girl to me, so I know who I’m looking for.”

“We can do better than that sir.” Said Armin with a small smile. “Jean drew a picture of her, it’s a very good likeness.”

An annoyingly tall teen handed a piece of paper to him. Levi studied it and felt his stomach drop. She was beautiful. If this picture was truly a good likeness and the boy hadn’t been exaggerating then-

Levi folded it up and placed it in his pocket, he didn’t want to look into those amber eyes a moment longer, why did the dragons always have to take the beautiful ones.

“Ok, I’ll leave at night fall.”

“We’ll come with you.” Eren said, jumping to his feet.

“No! I fight dragons alone. Just be sure my horse is ready.”

X~~~X

The moon was bright in the sky as Levi rode into the mountains, when he hunted dragons it was essential that his mind was pin sharp and focused, ready for what lay ahead. They were not easy beasts to conquer, they were as intelligent as they were brutal and only a fool would assume that he had learned everything about them.

But tonight his mind was plagued by the image of the girl the dragons had stolen. He was being foolish he knew after all it was only a drawing, the rose tint to her cheeks and the sparkle in her eyes might be the product of the artist imagination and not the subject. And yet something about the way her a red hair has flowered about her shoulders sparked something inside him-

Mentally he batted the imagine away and muttered a curse under his breath. He couldn’t keep doing this, focus!

He followed the clues carefully, over years he had learnt how to find a dragons nest, he was sure he’d reach it soon, then he would need to be ready for anything.

“Excuse me.”

A voice, a feminine one coming from nearby caused him to jump. He swung his horse round in the direction that it had come from but he couldn’t see anything.

“Who’s there?” He cried out.

“Are you hear to slay the dragon.” The voice came again but there was a slight tremble in it that made him pause- it couldn’t be, could it?

“Yes,” he answered trying to make his voice gentle as he dismounted from his horse. If it was truly her she’d been up here with dragons for over a week it was a miracle she was alive. “My name is Levi, the townspeople from Paradis sent me to find you.”

“Me?” Her voice was quiet, Levi’s eyes scanned the area trying to find her, he cursed the darkness he usually relied upon.

“You’re safe now, you can come with me.”

A movement to his left caught his eye, he realised it was her stepping out into the moonlight. His breath caught in his throat. The picture had been no exaggeration, if anything it hadn’t done her justice. Her Amber eyes seemed to shimmer in the moonlight, she was breathtaking. No wonder the townspeople had been so desperate to get her back.

“I can’t come with you.” She said as she studied him carefully.

“There are kids in the town below who sent me to find you. They are desperate to get you back.”

“I can’t go back, I made a promise, a long time ago. A promise to keep them all safe.”

What she was saying didn’t make any sense. But then given all she’d been through it made sense that she was a little disorientated.

“Armin and Eren they sent me and Sasha and Jean, they’ve all been worried about you.”

“Then you can give them a message for me please, tell them I’m fine. I had to pay my debt for keeping them all safe and that I hope all I’ve taught them in the last ten years will be enough for them to live long happy lives.”

Levi furrowed his brow, he wondered if she’d even been able to eat or drink the whole time she’d been here, dehydration alone could make people delirious.

“You can tell them yourself, come with me I can help you.”

“You can help me?” She asked her head tilted, she looked disbelievingly at him.

“Yes I can take you back with me.”

“You need to leave now. It’s not safe here for you.” She sounded angry.

“I can make it safe, I am Levi Ackerman the Dragon Slayer.”

“Ah that’s the problem, you see...” Suddenly her eyes seemed to grow brighter, they weren’t just shimmering in the moonlight they were glowing, they were on fire.

Light glowing red shot across her face outlining scales across her delicate pale skin, it almost blinded him as she began to transform. He had just enough time to reach for his sword as he heard her voice echoing all around him.

“I am Petra Ral. I am the dragon!”

—————————————————————————

A/N - Hi all, this was a combination of the above prompt and the one below. I’m not sure if your the same anon or two separate ones! But I hope you enjoyed.

As always reviews or evening just screaming in the tags is always appreciated.

#rivetra #rivetra fanfiction #petra ral #levi x petra #petra x levi #my writing #my fanfiction #fanfic #dragon slayer au

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aliypop · 4 years ago

Text

Brave Heart

Wordcount: 2,094

Warning: Language angst.

A/N: So this is apart of my Series The Element of Fate, I decided to make the shorts into a series, with that being said I hope you like this one! Also I hope I’m on the right track to writing Eskel, Lambert, and Vesemir!

"What's this between you two.." Tithuba asked. The sun was rising, and Geralt was outside tending to the bushes of herbs for their breakfast. "What's what.." Adina laughed, a stein cup full of herbal tea pressed to her lips, "This tastes like shit.." she mumbled under her breath.

"It'll help with your strength, now answer my question.." plucking a white strand off her daughter's shoulder. The question Tithuba asked was a question she asked herself every time he'd hold her or even opened up to her little by little.

"I.. love him but.."

"But what.." Tithuba's green eyes peered over her cup. The fireplace crackled behind, them the two tucked in warm wool blankets. The cottage was known to be colder during the early mornings.

"He's not mine.." she laughed, "He's a witcher they're.. they're cold and cruel.." she sighed, remembering his warm touch that she woke up to; his rough finger pads tracing over her warm but ragged scars. "What makes you say that.." placing her stein down, Tithuba could see the fear in her eyes that Clarion replaced where she had once put dreams in.

"Not the ones I know... Well, I knew.." Tithuba laughed,

"You've encountered Witchers before..." Adina asked, leaning in closer towards her mother, like a child hearing a hero's tale.

"What was he like.. did he have sharp teeth.." She joked, "What his name." her round brown eyes now focused on the witch in front of her. Tithuba only laughed at how naive she still was.

"He did have sharp canine teeth and Black hair that was turning white." Tithuba smiled, "He went by Vesemir.." she shrugged her shoulder, "He was a monster with a sword. " she laughed, "Meaning great swordsmanship." she corrected herself.

To say that Tithuba had admired Vesemir was an understatement. Her cheeks would burn red when she talked about him, and her eyes would have a sparkle in them.

"However, back to you."

When Adina heard the subject brought back around again, her heart nearly fell back in her chest.

"Why do you question your emotions .." And within one thought, Adina had said something that she knew she could never take back.

"Because if knights and Witchers rarely mix, then why should a Princess and a dumb mutant ex-"

"Gods.. you couldn't be fucking worse than anyone else.." Geralt said, standing against the door frame, holding the chopped wood in his arms. Geralt would never admit it, but he had felt more pain in that entire sentence than any monster he had faced.

"Geralt, I didn't-" Adina's voice became hush.

"Get out of my life!"

"You don't mean that!" Adina interjected, running towards him, "You can't possibl-"

"You're a burden, and I don't want you around fucking my life over!" at the moment, he had meant every word that came out of his mouth.

"What's going .."

SLAM!

The door behind The Witcher nearly sounded as if it would break off. "Adina, you're crying.." Flora said, rushing to her side. Flora knew of broken hearts when she saw one, and this was it. "What have I done..." she balled her fist up.

The sweet smell of Summer had left, and the crips snow had fallen. "Are you sure you have to go.." Tithuba asked, watching Adina climb upon the back of Buttercup in her winter cape, the fur from a fallen white wolf on the hood. "I promised Florian I would be there at the ceremony .." her smile still a bit dim. "This isn't because Geralt might be there, is it.." a silence fell upon the pair. Watching as her daughter galloped away into the winter sunrise, Tithuba knew that she still had a soft spot for Geralt. Besides, why on earth would she wear the fur of a white wolf if not to catch him. Adina, who had found herself in a pub, heard the ever-familiar tune,

Toss a coin to your Witcher

"Jaskier.." her head shot up: she hadn't seen the bard since the day Geralt had left out of her life. Within those times, Adina had not only taken care of her mothers' establishment but had been apart of a few hellish crusades. With a healing scar going through her eyebrow, she still managed to look so regal but with a bit of an edge. Her tired eyes, much like Geralt's, were only now focused on one thing. "Ale... that was Geralt's favorite.." she laughed to herself, looking back at the snow; she hadn't noticed the same plunky bard in front of her grinning like a foolish idiot.

"Geral-" Jaskier almost said, watching as the wolf hood cape came down: he was in complete shock. " Adina.. " he gasped, a bit surprised but also aroused by her new look. Her hair was shorter, but her curls were still as beautiful as ever. " A Greva got your tongue Jas.." she asked, fingers in her hair. As she turned her back towards him, the bard had noticed a mark that resembled a dragon rising from flames.

"You're.."

"Aye! It's the knight of the Flame!" a few villagers said. Jaskier had never seen Adina so vibrant as she was now. Jaskier had only heard songs about her, but he never connected the two. Watching as she waved, Jaskier just knew that he had to get back with Geralt.

"So what happened to you and Flora.."

"We had a very bloody falling out.. after you helped her find her family.. they refused to let her see me again.. and well.." he sighed, " I haven't written a love song since.. " listening to him talk, she realized just how much your fate depends on the person willing to chase it. "Well, accompany me to Anore for the union of Florian.." leaving a few coins on the table, the two were later on their adventure through the cold, rough winds, and soon the beautiful kingdom where the flowers still sprouted in the death of winter cold.

"And then I said..." seeing a few leaves rustle, Jaskier began to quiet down. Unsheathing her sword was the knight ready for any monster or witcher she came across. "Do you hear that.. suppose it was a Djinn.. or.. or those hasty Hagons.. or worse.." the brightly colored man said, hiding behind Buttercup.

"If you want me come and get... FUCK!" almost snow blonde hair toppled out from the tree and onto Jaskier, dressed in her traditional winter apparel, was,

"Flora.."

"Jaskier.." her cheeks red from the winter bite, Flora couldn't believe it. Right under her was Jaskier, who had seemed to grow a bit more chest hair since she last saw him. "Why are you in my forest.." getting off of him as she pressed an arrow to his throat, "Did someone send you to kill m-" Adina only smirked, her neck-length hair getting covered in snow. "Drop the arrow.. " her sword drawn to the new warrior's neck.

"You wouldn't. "

"Try me.."

Watching the elf drop her weapon, she later put her sword down. Embracing her in a hug made her remember the simple times when there wasn't a war. Or her attending to the needs of the people of Vizima.

"Being a knight has not been kind to you, has it," Flora asked, looking up at the taller woman who shook her head, "No, but it's been rewarding." She climbed back on Buttercup, "

Are you headed to Anore by any chance?"

"Get your arse on the horse we'll, pick up clothes on the way there. " as the trotting of Buttercup continued, she realized how much she had missed having friends. Hearing both Jaskier and Flora pick up right where they had left off brought joy to her slowly welting heart.

When they arrived in the kingdom, Adina could feel the love that Florian had for his bride surrounding it. It almost made her hopeful. Looking in the mirror, she had made an illusion of Geralt, knowing that if he were there right now, he would have been rendered speechless. "

"Adina, you're going to be late for the ceremon.." Flora gasped, seeing the added tone to her build in her dress. She looked like what people imagined the goddesses to look like, "You look beautiful .." she whispered, lost for words at what she had just witnessed. "You think so.." she gave the gown a twirl.

"I know so... If you leave now, you can get to Kaer Morhen in two weeks.."

"What.."

"Go to him.."

The heavy snowfall in Kaedwen was almost unbearable. Leaving her horse in the pastures, she found herself lost, not being able to find the witchers trail. Feeling as though she would now die alone in an unknown, land Adina felt as though this would be her fate, or so she thought. Hearing soft footsteps, she knew that something and or someone was behind her. Taking out her sword, she flipped it in her right hand, turning to the left and almost stabbing what seemed to be another witcher but older. As he blocked her attack, he grew impressed with her footwork as well as her stance. If only his students moved the way she did, he'd had been proud of them. Taking her blade to the throat of the man, she had only one thing to say.

"Any last words.." her Abbinshire accent now replaced with the Lryia one her mother had.

"I've been expecting you, Tithuba's daughter.." he smirked,

"You're Vesemir.." she gasped, looking up at him, removing her blade from his neck.

"Perhaps we should find you some other clothes.." he shook his head, guiding her to the path of the castle: Adina was in awe of everything that she had seen. From the snowy mountains to even a few Witchers training. "So this is where he's from.." she mumbled, under her breath, looking around, changing into a linen shirt, pants made of leather, and a doublet or deep blue: She realized just how much warmer she felt,

"He should be here soon.." Vesemir sighed from behind the door.

"I didn't come to find G-" she then nodded, noticing that he had already walked away with a possible shit-eating grin on his face. Vesemir had already known what happened besides: it wasn't as if Geralt was roaming around the halls brooding a bit more than he usually did. Finding her way towards the keep, she had noticed two other Witchers, one with red spikes and the other mostly in black.

"Curly hair.." the one in red mumbled,

"Check."

"Brown eyes to get lost in."

"Check"

"Looks like a Knight.."

"Check.."

"You must be the one wolf's been brooding on about.." Adina looked up in confusion, "I'm Eskel.. The idiot over there is Lambert." he introduced himself, looking at the woman that Geralt had seemed to never shut up about,

"Don't listen to the loving bastard," Lambert smirked, kissing her hand. "Wolf picked good.." he then mumbled, watching as the knight blushed.

"I see where Geralt gets his charm from.." she laughed. The two witchers waited for the return of Geralt. The pair both had begun teaching Adina how to play Gwent, in which she was losing even though Eskel took it easy on her.

" That's bullshit, Lambert, you cheated!" Adina's laughter filled the keep

"Kiss my arse princess!" he growled.

"Mayhaps I will!" She smirked, putting her best card forward. As time passed, Adina kept bonding with the witchers, who seemed to have taken her in their wolf pack. From playing Gwent to a bit of sword fighting, she felt that she found a family.

"And then the Striga was behind us, and it nearly ate Geralt.." she looked behind her. The so-called white wolf, who she had now heard every embarrassing story about, was standing there,

A feeling of shock at her new look washed over him, trying to keep a stoic appearance. "It's been a while.." Geralt said, shifting his weight around, trying to seem more intimidating. "Seems it has .." she looked into his weary eyes:

"I see you became a Knight.." he looked at her now rough hands. She looked beautiful, but the words that she said still rang in his head.

"I did... it's been tiring, bloody and lonely.." her hand on his face. Both Lambert and Eskel watched in the background, their heads in the palm of their hands. The pair only gasped at how whipped he was for her.

"You should take him to bed!" Lambert shouted.

"You dick.." Geralt grumbled under his breath.

#the witcher oc #the witcher fanfiction #the witcher fandom #the witcher oc fanfiction #geralt x oc #jaskier x oc #Eskel #lambert #vesemir #new series #new characters

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shortstoriesbyescher · 4 years ago

Text

What If?

“What if I gave him a chance? What if we tried?” A girl looking up in the sky and asking herself what if? represents Zia while the mountain she’s standing on represents how hard letting go is. It's really difficult to let go of things that we desperately want to keep. At some point in our lives, we have all been faced with the decision of whether to let go of or hold on to something or someone. Letting go is one of the hardest things we have to do in our lives, yet it is sometimes the only way to get ourselves to go forward.

The cold wind touches my skin as the water slowly falls down my cheeks. It’s been months but I still can't accept it. Things become messy and get out of hand. My head is filled with bombarded questions that will never be answered.

“Zia, wake up! We need to go there at 8”. I opened my eyes and got out of my bed when my mom knocked again. While on our way to her new place, I can’t prevent thinking about the memories we had since we were little.

“Hey do you see the new guy, he looks so sad, c'mon let's talk to him,” Stella said and grabbed me towards the back part of our classroom. There, I saw a new boy who’s sitting beside the window. He is just a typical nerdy boy with hazelnut eyes, long eyelids, and his skin is like an almond that shines because of the sunlight. His hair is a little bit curly that makes him cute-- wait, did I just say cute? Oh my gosh! “Sorry she’s a bit preoccupied, but her name is Zia,” Stella said and nudged me.

“Hello Zia and Stella, I’m Luis. Nice to meet you both”, and that was where our trio-friendship started.

After a year, we all graduated elementary and spent a month of summer vacation in Ilocos before our parents decided that they would enroll us in the same academy. At first, we had a happy normal life, and I, being confused with my feelings for Luis not until-- Years later, Stella and Luis leveled up their relationship and became official lovers. Then our lives suddenly changed when Stella and I were involved in a car accident where she hit her head on the window of our school bus when it crashed on a tree.

It's been months, I thought we are all getting better and we’re moving on from that accident but things started to become blurry. Stella is always having headaches and feeling numbness sometimes. “Don’t be sad, I promise you that I’m going to visit the both of you here every summer”, she said and hugged me and Luis. We watched her turn around and walk in the opposite direction with her parents until they became smaller and smaller; until I cannot see them anymore.

“This is the final boarding call for passengers on flight 372A to Washington City. Please proceed to gate 3 immediately. The final checks are being completed and the captain will order for the doors of the aircraft to close in approximately five minutes. I repeat. This is the final boarding call for passengers on flight 372A. Thank you”.

We keep our connection with Stella through video calls although it is very hard to keep our communication especially since we have different time zones. Every week Luis and I will call Stella to tell all our stupid stories to her, but I’ve noticed that as the months passed by Luis will always have private conversations with her which will escalate ending up him ending the call. But rather than ask them both, I’ll just let it off because it might be about their relationship at hand. I may not have any romantic relationships but I can say it’s hard to have an LDR.

One night while chilling in Luis’ house, I received a text from Stella and I can’t help but scream with excitement as I read the text ‘ clear up your schedule for Saturday you are the first person I want to see;) ’. Luis can’t help but look at what I’m reading on my phone, but I was confused by his reaction. He looks concerned and confused. But, why? He should be happy because his girlfriend is going home. Then, he immediately grabbed his phone and called Stella, and went straight to his room.

“Zia, I told you we’re too early” Luis complained while stomping his foot. He’s so childish. We were just 2 hrs early, I would rather wait in the airport than beat the rush hour. “ZIA!” someone shouted and I knew very well who owns that voice so I turned around with a big smile to greet her. But my smile faded a bit as I noticed that she lost a few pounds but I didn't mind because maybe she worked out in the U.S. So, I quickly ran to hug her and as I hugged her tightly I looked up at Tita Annalise, her mom, at her back asking if something’s wrong. I felt relief when she sweetly smiled at me and said everything was fine.

With Stella back home, Luis and I spend our entire summer in Stella’s house. Luis and I will bring snacks and watch movies and we will bond all day long. Till one day, while we're chasing around her room, she collapsed and was rushed to the hospital. We followed the ambulance to the hospital and with my face stained with tears I searched for my best friend. Then I saw her entering a private room, but Luis and I decided to just wait outside until the doctors were gone.

As I come inside, I can’t help but ask, “what is going on with you? Just tell me so I can understand”. I was sobbing through my words hoping she understood. But instead of getting any clarifications, I was now filled with regret and resentment.

“Please I don’t want you to be sad, I’m really tired. I’m sorry, Zia. Also, be happy I know you have feelings for Luis so promise me that you won’t feel any guilt just because you like him. It’s okay for me, I’m not mad, I’m happy that finally, both of you have your own time. Now, I can really rest. Remember that I will never forget you, I love you my best friend, Zia.”

That was the last conversation we had, and I know that- that will be the last time I will hear her voice. “Hey, we’re here”, dad called me and guided me as I got down from our car. From afar, I saw her near Luis. We slowly walk towards them as the cold wind touches my skin and as the water slowly falls down my cheeks. But I quickly wiped my tears and bravely held my head high. It’s been two months but it is still hard for me to accept that Stella is gone. I can now see the faces of all the people who lied to me about her condition. I look at Tita Annalise and I can still remember every single word she told me.

“The day you had the car accident, we thought that- that was just a simple headache caused by the impact, but we’re wrong. Stella had a stage 3 brain tumor at that time, but she didn't want you to be worried about her so she chose to go to America for her treatment. We all thought that she would recover, but she can’t hold on to her chemotherapy. Then the doctor told us that she only has approximately nine-month to live, and that is when our little girl decided to go back here and make the most of her time making memories with us.”

I look at her picture that is placed on her tombstone. I was the one who took that picture, her big round eyes, perfect smile, thick eyebrows that match her eyelids, her laugh and giggles, I can still hear all of that. But why Stella? Why didn't you tell me? I’m your best friend, why did you do this to me? I am now bombarded with questions that will never be answered because the only person who can answer those is already resting in heaven.

After the mass, Luis and I decided to talk to clear up all the things we left behind. We went to a cafe for a while and ordered some snacks before we went back to the cemetery. We both just sat down in front of Stellas’ grave. He tried to break the silence but I couldn't even open my mouth to talk. It seems like there is something that blocks my throat.

“There’s no one here, you can cry now. Don’t hold your tears. You can cry now, like how you used to cry to me every time you had small fights with Stella.” He said while looking into my eyes. And that was my signal to cry and break down after all that happened. After Stella died. I talk to no one except my parents. I cried hard for a few minutes and as I quieted down he approached and hugged me but that made me cry again and questioned him.

“You already knew her condition before she went to Washington, but why didn’t you tell me?” I asked him.

“Because she told me not to tell you and I made a promise to her”

“But her condition must be exempted, Luis! She’s our Stella, my best friend, your girlfriend!. I can’t help but shout at him.

“Because I made a promise, Zia, please listen to me. You know me, you know how important promises are to me”.

Out of frustration, I broke down again and as I calmed down he started to talk again, “After she fled to the U.S., she broke up with me and told me to pursue you”.

I stared at him and gaped but I avoided my gaze immediately. I can't stare at him any longer while I'm a hot mess.

“Stella is a very smart woman I’ve known, she knew when to fight and when to surrender. Our relationship was formed right after primary school and as we got older, both of us grew and matured individually and realized that we both fell out of love. Maybe because we just misunderstood our feelings at that time. That it’s not really loved like a partner, but love as a sister and brother. Then, she told me that she noticed the way I look at you as we spend time together. I know it's not the right time to ask this, but I want to know your side” he said as I looked into his eyes.

I breathed out before I answered his question, “ I like you.” I saw how his eyes glistened for a moment until he heard what I said next.

“I like you until now, but all the things are messed up. So please Luis, you’re the only one I have right now, and our friendship is more important to me and I don't want to lose you. I think it is better for the both of us to stay like this, you're my best friend and I’m your best friend. We're still in college, you'll meet other girls along the way and I'll support you with who you want to be. Just please let's stay friends. I hope you understand”

He chuckled and said, “ I know you're going to reject me but I never thought it would hurt this bad. I just tried to shoot my shot but I guess it was bad timing. Still, remember I'll always be here for you as a friend. Thank you for clarifying Zia. Love you both” as we both stared at her grave.

Years have passed, I’m already working as a nurse in St. Luke Medical Center. It was a sunny morning when I woke up. Today is my day off, so I decided to go to the supermarket to restock my needs in my condo. On my way to my unit, I saw a package outside my door, so I picked it up and went inside. As I saw it was from Luis I immediately opened the package. My heart started to beat faster when I saw a silver envelope inside. I reached for it inside the box and carefully opened it. It is an invitation letter for his wedding next month. It's been years but still, there’s a part of me that is regretful with my decision before.

What if I gave him a chance? What if we tried? There are a lot of what-ifs that will be left unanswered.

But I’m happy for him, because finally after years, he found his true love. I remember one quote I’ve read, ‘one of the happiest moments in our lives is when we find the courage to let go of what we cannot change’. And I think I need to accept all the things happening to me right now because I’m the one who puts myself in this situation. So I'm responsible for what I will do to move forward in my life. And maybe soon I can accept that there is no fairytale for the both of us.

#shortstory blog escher

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