#i have just enough energy to clean a little and cook and i gotta do it when i can because i never know when im going to get more spoons

[wonryllis]

watermelon sugar (m) | sim jaeyun.

﹙ 🎬 ﹚ ぃ ────𝗶𝗳 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗻 𝘀𝘂𝗴𝗮𝗿 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗲𝘁?

preview. he’s the sweetest to you, one might confuse him for your boyfriend, but he’s not, he just your fuckboy of a roommate who treats you like a delicate candy, always looking out for you and never at you; or so you think.

or where, jake can't seem to get you off his mind no matter how hard he tries.

meet the cast. simp sim jaeyun(jake) with his obsession fem!reader

genre. and they were roommates trope, fuckboy soft for his girl trope, SMUT MDNI!!!, lots of toothrooting fluff, tiny speck of angst but not proper angst, drunk confessions?, only one who can control him/her trope, happy happy ending, crack/humor, domestic scenes(newly added) college fuckboy athelete roommate!jake with his candy!roommate girl. computer science & programming major!reader, exercise physiology major!jake, nonidol!au, soccer player!jake.

word count. 13,488 unedited! it's word vomit.

warnings. fingering, dry humping, dirty talkkk lots and lots of it, nasty freak jake with innocent(seems to be) girlie, experienced x inexperienced(virgin but has idea), pussy slapping, somewhat drunk sex but there's consent consent, oral (m rec.) different scenes, p in v (unprotected! but pls pls pls do not do this ever use protection!!!!!) multiple orgasms (f.rec), overstimuation(f.rec) and somewhat (m.rec), spitting? slight nipple play, jake is rough and filthy, with heavyyyyy corruption kink it's all throughout the story, strength kink, size difference “i worship the ground you walk on” energy but still dominant jake, jake has soooo many dirty inner thoughts about you it's innumerable. he's a simp for you so you're a slut for him— i guess that's them?

theme song. animals by maroon 5 (jake pov), into you by ariana grande (yn pov)

﹙★﹚ ࣪DRABBLES (find them here)

` author notes. im sorry for making you guys wait three extra weeks I hope y'all still want to read this,, what do i say it was so horrible before the revamp, thankfully it's so much better now and the smut god, it was so hard to write it i hope it's good enough. REBLOGS AND FEEDBACKS ARE HIGHLY ENCOURAGED AND APPRECIATED!!

“i don’t mind this feeling.”

YOU DONT KNOW WHAT TO CALL IT, WHATEVER IS HAPPENING BETWEEN YOU BOTH, BUT YOU LIKE IT. IT FEELS SILLY AND FRAGILE AND GOOD. perhaps a little too good.

god forbid what you had done in your past life to get a roommate like jake, a complete package; a concoction of all classic kinds of roommate one could possibly expect. you aren’t complaining though he takes care of you in every way he possibly could. making you feel like his entire world revolves around you, from his time home to the hours he spends on the field. one would ask anything of him and his answer would surely include you in one way or another, everyone knew it, everyone could see it, the way he feels.

he makes you breakfast, he helps with the cleaning- you both actually have it planned to have a cleaning day every week to polish the apartment. he cooks for you and he does the dishes more often than not, the only exception being the time when you insist deathly on doing it yourself because come on you gotta do at least some thing around the house.

to add to the perfect mixture of god gifted man, he video games in his room with the door shut so that the sound of him shouting at the screen doesn’t disturb you. does the laundry- even your bras and underwear, he’s just too used to those clothings to give a care to get embarrassed (outwardly). he would never admit the way they get him all hot and bothered when he thinks of all the places those fabrics have touched. how wild his imagination runs and all the things he wishes he could do to you. all the sounds he could get, out of you and all the things you'd taste of.

you are his candy (well not exactly ‘his’ but according to him this nickname of yours is only and I repeat only reserved for him) literally because you are all over sweets all the damn time and figureratively because he’d die to have a taste of you; the forbidden fruit of his life, too innocent for a person like him to ruin. but lord would he give up everything to land a chance to lay his hands on you not so innocently.

this man does not give a fuck about who is not you, and maybe occasionally spare a care for his two best friends who so far have only been blessed enough to know your name because jake has made it clear that you're off-limits and if they ever dare to do anything given the opportunity he'd rip off their balls and feed it to ducks (he's serious he swears)

getting to the real point of your dynamic: the only drawback— jake sim is a renowned fuckboy on campus, the heartbreak prince and you, his miss americana as they all like to call it. it is a daily routine, having to find a new girl in the house and ofttimes hearing them even with your door closed and your hands pressed on your ears. at first it felt disgusting, then you got used to it, and now very recently you’ve been feeling weirdly dejected. a certain kind of hatred towards the girls, something you can’t pin point exactly to why and what it is.

“candy, my laptop broke down again!” jake's raspy voice dances through the little cracks of the bathroom door as you prepare for a quick shower. you sigh, tightening the towel wrapped around you before stepping out. a short knock at his batman poster door left ajar, and he's whipping his head to have a look at you as if he knew you'd be in the middle of washing up. a little secret, yes he knew because everytime ahead of bathtime you make sure to have a sip of your watermelon slush stack from the fridge and the sound of it's door reaches his room just right to let him know.

he remains seated on his bed, a sheepish smile on his face. your eyes fall at his desk to see his laptop closed, he tricked you, and like always you fell for it,“maybe if you used your school laptop to study instead of playing games on it, this wouldn't happen all the time. but i assume you probably did it to get me here, it’s not gonna work everytime yun,” you click your tongue in feigned annoyance making him grin wider,“well it does work everytime though,” he knows how to have you on his tail just like you know how to have him wrapped around your finger. it only seems fair, you both know what gets the other going and you use it to your advantage.

“what is it?” asking in a sing song tone, you plop down on his desk chair. spinning in rounds with your legs out swinging, hands gripping onto the arms of the chair while looking up at the phosphorescent glow-in-the-dark stickers you had forcefully put up on the ceiling of his room. a funny memory of jake trying to stop you because it would defeat the whole image of his room only to fold when you gave him the puppy doe eyes, baby talking that you really wanted to do it. it doesn't take much to have jake cave in, just one look from you and the boy is a flatline. fuckboy? he is that to everyone but to you he's practically whatever you want him to be, though you have never really had a talk about it.

“actually eunsang, she-” there is a hesitation is his tone you are well aware of, having almost a clear idea of what he's about to say,“i told- no warned you not to get involved with her for a second time, didn’t i?” you scold, feeling that little twinge of hurt knowing he probably will keep on being involved with girls like this no matter what you say. it's the one thing where you don't have him under your spell. or that's you think, i mean you you have no idea do you of how much he wants you. just like how you have no idea how much you want him.

“yes but it happened and now she’s after me all the time, she even showed up to my soccer practice yesterday! please just this one time, please help me get rid of her,” clamping together his hands in a plea, jake pouts as best as he can, giving you his puppy eyes. but when you don’t show a reaction of any sort he resorts to the next best guaranteed thing: bribery,“i’ll buy you tons of watermelon lollipops! from your favorite brand that too!” eyes sparkling with hope and expections of having you fall for it, like you do every single time, he waits. albeit patterns break, in everything and everyone.

“no, i’m on a diet. i gave up on sweets, what if i get diabetes? will you,” you point at him dramatically,“take responsibility?” to which his stance morphs into one of stunned. he would gladly take responsibility for you at any given chance, but it's one of more gravity and significance than diabetes. and he's sure he's not one you should be in care of as more than anything that you are right now. he's too corrupted and you are too naive.

“yes of course i’ll help you take your meds and-” he mumbles in a quick, hurried note aware that you’ll not let him answer if he’s not fast enough. you still beat him to it though, speaking loud over and above his voice, to drown out his words despite hearing them quite clearly,“will you? NO you will not! so let me just shower peacefully before i get the urge to lock you in the bathroom when you’re in there later,” with a silence after, one that has jake grinning again at your cuteness, you take it as a que to rush out swiftly. trying to make it to the bathroom before he decides to use his strength against you and hold you down wherever he wants. which though hasn't been often, has always left you breathless and flustered to a point you refuse to admit.

training to become an athlete, a buff center forward in comparison to you who barely puts effort into doing even a little bit of yoga once a month. it’s obvious he’ll have you give in if he wants but he’s too sweet to force you. and of course it's obvious, the tension of the strength kink that looms over in the room.

it comes as a shock to you when the next day, the first thing you see waking up in the morning and walking into the living room: is eunsang standing by the kitchen counter. and important point: clad in one of jake’s dress shirts that you recognize from doing his laundry occasionally, pouring herself a glass of water. oh you had to see this coming, this is jake we're talking about will be really ever like ever not bring over girls? no matter if they're clingy or not. the answer is ambiguous and definitely not to your favor.

she’s shares a small smile upon noticing you, a friendly smile which you know is obviously fake. she’s doing it just to look good and polite in jake’s eyes. just to show that she's not bothered by you, because as said everyone knows if they don't like you then they automatically are on jake sim's blacklist. and being the star player of the team, his acquaintance is more or less influential to a large extent, so note to be taken be nice to candy to not be on the cross out list.

however as sad as it is to say it’s of no use. she’s not even there in his eyes to begin with. the moment the jake comes out of his room, his field of vision doesn’t include her. passing by her very visible figure like she’s a microscopic bug to ruffle your hair in a dotting manner, his morning voice coming out in an adoring essence,“good morning, candy,” he smiles and scrunches up his nose when he notices the baby cat you both adopted last month, curled up in the corner of the couch,“and mei,” he acknowledges your pet kitty but not the girl he brought home, that should speak volumes to you, jake thinks. treating you like candy of his world you are, shouldn't that be the ultimate giveaway of his feelings? like even his hookups can see how down bad he is for you why is it that you're the only one who can't? he wants you to know but at the same time he feels he's not right for you, a dilemma he handles by fucking up over and over again.

wishing him morning in response you give him a look which silently delivers your question of what is going on. you did hear them last night (more like her), but you didn’t know it was her her. you weren’t even expecting her to be the one. after the conversation with jake yesterday, she was the last person you would have ever assumed. he sends you a flying look that he’ll explain everything later, shushing you off before you speak out loud.

“yunie,” your ears perk up at her voice, eyes narrowing in a deadly stare at the nickname you exclusively call him with, leaving her crusty mouth. certainly, like jake you blossom a definite possession over names too. perhaps it's the effect of living with him 24/7 but you seem to have picked up a lot of his antics.

jake’s eyes shift to look at you for a moment and then he’s running a hand through his hair, dropping his sweet conduct to get back into his usual cold fuckboy self. he absolutely does not like the way your brows turn down and the pretty smile you were previously adorning for him falling off your pretty lips. he can tolerate anything but seeing you bothered in any way. “you’re still here? it's better if you leave soon, candy doesn’t like all this,” walking around her to the other side of the counter and into the kitchen to open the upper cabinets, jake ignores her like a plague as if he wasn't showing her heaven last night. but alas, nothing comes above you, she should have known that.

“what do you want for breakfast candy? should i make you some toast? or do you want your usual dose of sugar?” his palms rest on the granite countertop, leaning against it slightly while turning to fix his gaze on you. it makes eunsang rage with anger, throwing you a demeaning look before she disappears into jake's room.

the moment his bedroom door closes, you feel the unfamiliar weight on your shoulders relax a tad bit,“my watermelon slush please,” finding your cozy spot on the kitchen counter, you give him your most adorable pout feeling like you had to gain back his warmth after the hookup. your legs dangle over the height between, toes softly brushing against jake's calves every two seconds. watching him prepare your drink, you decide to voice out the thing that had been disturbing since the moment you walked out your room,”did you like make a friends with benefit kind of arrangement or something?” it comes out in a low whisper, afraid if you said it too loud it'd come true. the thought of it disturbs you for some reason, it’s not new for you to see random girls in your apartment; or to hear them while they’re at it. yet it still gives you a sort of uneasy feeling, something you do not like feeling.

“it was a last time kind of deal actually,” he stops briefly to give you a quilty smile. finishing your sweet slushy just as eunsang hastily steps out, wearing what you assume her clothes from the previous night. she slows down to observe as jake hands you the cup, repulsively watching you take a sip,“is it good?” hearing him speak in a tone way different than the one she’s acquainted with him using with her has stomp her way out in a grumpy fit.

looking up from the edge of your cup with hopes to give her a sly stare, your eyes follow her figure, flinching silently when she bangs the door close harshly,“bitch,” you comment, hooded orbs shifting back to jake who scowls in disapproval,”language candy,” he reminds, knowing very well it does nothing to stop you.

“sorry yunie but she's so agressive, and for what?” you whine.

“from what i’ve seen, you’re way more aggressive,” jake laughs softly, index finger coming to poke at your cheek tenderly.

with full cheeks, you grin like a cheshire cat and jake feels his heart rate speeding up, who gave you the permission to be the cutest person he's ever known? the urge to kiss you just keeps growing with each passing day and with with each little sneaky smile and doe eyes you give him.

“we need to get the groceries this week, i have after classes soccer practice for the next four days and we're not gonna last that long,” the thought of spending the next four evenings alone in the unit is gloomier than the half assed ham and cheese toast jake makes for himself. if only you said yes to some proper breakfast, his taste buds and stomach wouldn't be suffering so much.

you nod as if he has eyes on his back, knowing well he's gonna want you with him but not force you, if you'd say no. whatever you want, is whatever he does.

“‘m gonna go take a shower first then,” hopping down, you place your empty mug in the sink, and skip to your room to take your bath supplies.

“let’s shower together,” jake's friskiness thrives in the way he shouts with an undertone of mischief. watching you with a teasing gaze as you step out the threshold of your bedroom door. a tiny smirk spreading onto his lips when you scrunch your nose in a grimace. cute, he mouths thinking you wouldn't notice but god you do. he's clearly joking but you can’t help feeling flustered internally. keeping up with his flirty and touchy stunts and tricks should have made it easier for you by now, but over a year in and you're yet to find yourself getting used to it. he’s too attractive and hot to get used to; at least that’s what excuse your brain gives you, which honestly is true to some extent. his looks score a lot of points and you can't deny that.

“and if we get locked in there, who’s gonna get us out? you know the door lock has problems,” you complain in a soft groan which, in his eyes is more adorable with the little annoyance you show. if you think you could ever intimidate him, you probably will because he'll melt right away to even think of a counter back.

his stance straightens at that, a fleeting look of flabbergast clouding his face before he’s breaking out in a taunt of smile, eyes closing in on you in a brazen look,“so does that mean if the lock was fine you’d actually shower together with me,” he feels this triumph of emotions, a sudden rush of sugar at the realization that'd probably maybe perhaps someday let him get in the shower together with you. the sheer excitement he experiences through his veins is over the roof, just the possibility of something so intimate with you is a bite of golden spoon for him.

he purposely stops all he’s doing to stare at you, moving his eyebrows cheekily, trying to provoke you,“i never said that,” you stick your tongue out at him, closing the door in a soft slam and crying out a ‘you’re sick in the head!’

“only for you!” jake yells back, chuckling to himself as he leaves the room.

two hours later you’re both strolling through the isles of shelving, bright florescent lighting, end displays of popular products, sale signs, banners with store mottoes, isle signs with product locations, rows and rows of household products and everything you'd always spend lots of time looking through until jake has to drag you back home.

he pushes the cart while you look around for items to throw in and cross out one by one from your checklist. the way you both discuss and bicker over what to keep in the cart and what not to every two minutes will lead any sane person to conclude you as a couple. you both would also admit it feels as such. how he insists on taking what you like while you argue that you’re on a diet and need to cut down on the consumption and desires of your sweet tooth. it feels sweet, he feels sweet. and you make him want to coddle you so bad, like what do you mean you're on a diet? you're perfect already. too perfect for him.

“i’m taking the pop tarts!” you hear him shout from two or probably three Isles away while you look through some new make up launches,”…okay fine!” capturing the attention of an old couple who glance at your way and mutter something you don’t quite catch but you assume it’s probably about how annoying you both are, shouting at the mart.

“yunie look these are so pretty,” you point at the line of lipgloss as jake comes over with cart. he hums in agreement, watching you scan through the shades in an animated mood, mumbling over the names and speaking of how it'd look good for an everyday look or with summer dress you recently got. oh how smitten he feels, observing the way you seem so pumped up simply over gloss.

“there's no mirror— “

“try it on me,” oh he's bewitched under your spell.

jake stands still as you apply the mauve on him, staring at you through hooded eyes,”oh, this one’s really pretty on you!” you beam, looking up at him as if he could see it too.

“it'd look prettier on you,” he's hardly able to whisper out, gaze trained on the way you part your lips while you wipe it off his and apply another. if he didn't have a strong self control, by now he would have shoved his tongue down your throat in the dirtiest and messiest kiss you'd ever known. knocking your breath out, as well as his. he's already on the verge of losing it with every little touch you leave on his lips, wetting your own as a habit.

“which one should i take?” you ask something cutely, jake almost feels guilty for the thoughts swimming in his head.

“i’ll buy all of it for you, we can do something like a chapstick challenge you know. the one where you kiss and guess the flavor,” he teases loving the tiny exasperated glare you throw him. “yunn, be serious! which one?”

“these two?” he points to ones you commented were pretty feeling impatient at the conjured up image of you wearing the colors on with you tiny, sexy little sundresses you got hidden in your closet. please feel guilty man he thinks.

in the end jake (successfully) convinces you to continue your diet later over the summer break offering to help you with it. and grabs a bunch of packets of your favorite snacks, your favorite brand’s watermelon lollipops and not to forget the fruit itself. checking all out he insists on carrying everything himself, only handing you the little bag that held your lollies in case you'd want one on the way back.

the subway is more crowded than usual, scarcely any seat left. it takes you a whole minute to scan around for an empty one, immediately encouraging jake to take it. a silly game of rock paper scissors to decide who stands, insisting firmly that he sit when you end up winning. the grocery bags rest by his foot and you stand between his legs, holding onto the bar wobbling every now and then. it’s just one stop left when jake suddenly pulls you onto his lap, adjusting you comfortably on his thighs and placing his hands on your legs possessively. you turn to look at him, lashes brushing against his skin and lips parting in the slightest at the adrenaline you feel pumping into your fast beating heart. the muscles in his chest feel firm at the faint touch of your back against him, the thumping of his own heart similar to that of yours.

he leans closer to whisper in your ear,“that creep right there kept staring you up and down,” pointing with a discreet move of his eyes as he drills holes through his stern gaze fixed on the said guy. you on the other hand, grow hot with irritation, perhaps just as hot and bothered you are feeling jake pressed so close. an abrupt and sharp impulse of anger.

“i’ll show him the fuck he was staring at," you mutter out, teeth gritted, and hands almost forming into fists, expression as innocent as always. jake seems to catch on to what you’re about to do and before you can get up from lap, his hold on you gets tighter,"okay, i know you hate this candy, but i don’t want you getting hurt in any way, if he does anything i’ll make sure to set him right, for now i think he got it that he’s not gonna stare at you however he wants,” hand grabing yours in gentle caresses along the expanse of your arm. delicate and slow like a soothing rub. his touch just as enticing and stimulating it is, is also calming, knowing exactly how to pacify your hot headedness. jake finds that really hot about you, the way you look like you couldn't harm a bug but he's seen you throw kicks and punches (for the right reasons) ‘looks like a cinnamon roll, could kill you’ he never knew that's his type. sometimes and really only some rare times he wonders if you're not as innocent as he thinks you are, getting rock hard at the thought of it, dick twitching multiple times imagining you saying and doing things that an angel like you shouldn't be.

for the rest of the ride he manages to lull you back to your sweet candy mode, making you laugh at his lame pick up lines, and occasionally tickling your sides. head falling back into his shoulder in cute giggles and hips rolling on him, damn only he knows how bad he's holding back. as shameless as he is he'd probably jump your bones right infront of everyone to see. thankfully you bring the decency in your relationship.

when your stop comes, he intertwines his fingers you as you walk out the compartment, just in case you decide to give the dude a slap before leaving.

“'m gonna flatten out all your abs today, you'll need to gym again,” jake chuckles, feeling you roll over his body like mei’s lint roller as he lays on your favorite fluffy kuromi rug typing away on his laptop an essay deadlined for tomorrow. the weight of your body on and off and the touch of your hot skin he feels funsies,“you do this all the time, candy and my abs have never left. how can i let them? knowing how much you love it,” reaching behind to hold you still on his back. you are glad he can't see the way your cheeks warm up at that, a bashful look on your face remembering all the times he's caught you ogling at his body.

“why are you sulking?” he asks when you don't respond with a whine like you usually do. aware that you behave this way either when you’re over the top bathing in happiness or dissatisfied with something.

“’m gonna gain weight now because of you, i’ll see all the snacks and sweets in the pantry and not be able to resist binge eating,” you lightly punch at the curve of his shoulders, dropping your head into the crook of his neck in a pout. jake turns around swiftly to hold you in a hug, wanting nothing more than to cheer you up,“i love your belly anyhow, whether it’s visible or not,” giving the plump flesh of your stomach a zephyr-like pinch. you wince playfully drawing back inches to tease him only to drop down into his arms to hug him back seconds later,“yeah whatever,” his words make you feel butterflies, a turmoil of frenzy and fuzzy feelings, cheeks growing warm once again, and the warmth spreading all over your mind this time. why does he have to be so sweet to you?

you both stay like that for a while breathing slowly, and taking in the comfort of a hug, the room saturated with a restful and serene silence. you’re the first to pull away,“you should finish that essay, i have to prepare for my test next week,” jake groans at the loss of your touch, wailing out with his hands as you leave the room.

”i’m joining you as soon as i finish this!”

four days later on the weekend, you sit on the couch alone, wrapped in the thin lilac charmeuse blanket jake got for you (he said it the softness of it, reminded him of you.) waiting for your him to join you. eight in the morning with ‘tangled’ running on the tv, it's not something jake would ever want to do, but he gives in because you like it; bonus sometimes when you get a little sleepy, he grabs the chance to cuddle you as close as he can, leaving a few fluttering kisses on your temple and cheeks. he's grateful you never say anything about it and just let him be.

“yunie, can you pass me the watermelon in the fridge? the one from yesterday,” you spare a quick glance towards jake as he walks out his room. his headset rests loosely around his neck, half naked, wearing only a pair of sweatpants and his black hair all dishevelled: looking even more messier due to the perm he got last week. “yeah sure,” the rasp in his voice as he mumbles out softly gives away the fact that he probably stayed up all night again.

taking the half a piece of watermelon out and grabbing a spoon, jake scoops out a small little portion. going up to your slouched figure on the couch, and extending it out for you to eat,“here you go, candy,” he does it quite often, infact he loves to feed you. seeing your cheeks full and your eyes sparkling makes him feel fond as much as it turns him on. picturing you the same way on your knees between his legs with his dick stuffed in your mouth. choking and gagging on him, tears dropping down your pretty eyes while you stare up at him with this same doe look. it'd be heaven. even more so if he would have to teach you how to do it right, further fueling the massive corruption kink he seems to have harboured after meeting you.

he passes you melon after you take the bite, sitting beside you with his legs crossed. eyes trained on the way you fill in more in your mouth than you can handle, face all round and full,”eat slowly,” he flicks at your forehead.

“do you want to go buy a new sofa at ikea tomorrow? this one’s pretty small,” he adds a minute later, raising his brows subtly.

“well, first of all i didn’t plan to have a roommate and secon- i swear if it’s for your hook-ups i’m kicking you out!” it comes out in a yell, voice raising with every syllable before you spit a seed at him. one that due to your bad aiming skills instead of landing on his face, falls and sticks to the skin of his chest. damn those muscles they get you feelings things you probably shouldn't be.

putting away the watermelon on your tea table, you pick up mei and settle her on your lap, pulling back your blanket which had slipped off in a crackle of laughter,“this is public space have some decency before you have such thoughts!”

“stop making me appear like a horndog!” he laughs along, whinning at your false accusations in giggles and a look of faux disbelief.

“well that is exactly what you are!” you throw the closest cushion at his face. grinning with your signature cutesy doe eyes and jake is a goner. he always is.

“no don't do this me,”

“change the sheets then, it's your turn this week,” turning away from him, you fix your eyes on rapunzel climbing down the tower. trying to avoid the way he stares at you with betrayal, immediately scooting over to tickle you.

“you cheeky liar it's your turn,” his hands glossing over your ticklish areas.

“i love you,” in a fit of uncontrolled giggles, you shout. pushing against him to escape only to have your wrists pulled away, held together in a tight grasp and pinned above your head. “candy! i love you is not gonna get you out of chores come on i'll help you. we'll watch tangled later. together, i promise,” his laughter dies down with every word he utters, whispering out the last part as he becomes aware of the proximity between you two. so close you both think, breaths slowing down and heartbeats picking up the pace with each passing second.

“we're doing this okay?” jake whispers again, albeit, his tone a tad bit more heavy and bothered. an ambiguous daze clouding over, as if he is talking about something entirely different than just changing sheets. a twinge of lust bubbling inside. having you under him like this makes him realize just how desperately he wants you, and how bad his strength kink blooms for you. to have you whimpering and moaning, gaze all hazy as you let him do whatever he wants with you. damn he feels his dick twitch at that, gulping nervously hoping you wouldn't notice.

“you look like eugene,” you mumble out suddenly and jake feels his thirst rise off the roof, because the size difference between the characters? he wouldn't deny he thought of you the first time he saw the animation. wanting you have you in his arms the same way.

“then you must be my rapunzel,” you feel even more flustered if that's possible, your stomach twisting and twirling at his words until,”now come on we gotta keep the house clean for mother gothel,” jake let's his grip on you loosen, taking a moment to get off you.

“yunie!”

“i'll make you some sweet soy-glazed potatoes too later,” he voice drowns out as he enters you bedroom first.

“well i guess it's okay then,” you giggle following after him.

“candy that's not how you tuck in the corners,” jake scolds you for nth time, running after you to fix the edges you mess up deliberately time and again. “hey! candy! get down!” you make it a chaos for him, jumping onto the unmade bed and messing up the sheets all the way.

“oops,” there's a devilish grin on your face as jake pauses to watch you have your sugar rush episode.

“if you wanna wrestle again and end up under me, just say so,” he teases, inching closer and grabbing you by the waist. you both laugh again as if you weren't dripping with need for each other just moments ago. he picks you up and walks to the door putting you down by the sill,”i seriously need to get this done, you go and peel the potatoes for me,” you can't cook for the sake of god and letting you use knives is like a deathwish, jake can only hope peeling will keep you busy and safe enough to not end up with cuts anywhere.

the doorbell rings just as you step into the kitchen, walking back to the front in a sluggish sigh. feeling utter regret for answering the door, the instant you notice the figure outside. not wanting to reveal the presence to jake, you shut the door behind.

he peeps out your room at the sound of it, shrugging it off as nothing because you’ve done it lot many times: when your friends show up because you simply don’t want them to fall under his radar as prey.

you spare an indifferent glance at the way eunsang stands tall; hands folded with a cocky look on her rather gorgeous face. she's a beauty and you hate to admit that, a vibe so opposite of you it makes you insecure considering jake's hooked up with her more than a few times. “i’m here to see jake,” she states, tilting her head to point over at the closed door, all the sugary honeyed act she keeps up around him nowhere to be seen.

“and he doesn’t want to see you, didn’t he tell you it was the last time,” you counterattack, folding your arms and straightening up to look intimidating. your stare is one of taunt, carrying a gaze of boredom in hopes to establish that you're one to reckon with.

“are you jake? i said i want to talk to jake not you,” her heels click in impatience and underlying disgust in the tone she uses with you gets on your nerves.

you close your eyes for a moment trying to calm the annoyance in you before it turns into anger, tongue poking at the side of your cheek, “and are you deaf? i said he does not want to talk to you,” assert dominance, assert dominance you repeat over and over in your head.

but what she says next makes you lose your temper.

jake, the very epicenter of it all, on the other hand has no idea of what's going on outside until there's a scream that sounds too much like you, one turning into many more. it's frantic and inhumane, the speed at which he runs out. dropping everything and anything. there in broad daylight he finds you and eunsang trying to rip each other's hair out in the thankfully empty hallway. he doesn't know if he should be worried more about your scalp hurting or your throat tearing from how loudly you scream over eunsang. his hands flail as he contemplates on breaking the fight or letting you calm down, which you probably won't as he knows. he grabs onto eunsang's hands on your head trying to loosen her grip on your hair, concerned over the pain you must be feeling while you're there now trying to kick her between her legs. she's shocked to say the least, watching him latch you off her in a swift motion and throw you over his shoulder. he takes you back inside quickly, groaning at your fists pounding against his back in a protest,”fucking let go of me! i’m gonna give her a good piece of my mind!”

“candy language!” putting you down by the kitchen softly, he grasps the side of your arms and forces you to look into his eyes,“stop fighting all the time, stay here i’ll talk to her, okay?” he speaks slowly as an attempt to calm you. when you wiggle off in a scornful shrug, he asks again, this time moving to cup your face, a tender look in his eyes,“okay?” you nod in a defeated sigh and he's out the door before you can say anything else. you're upset, really upset, you know what you did outside was not decent yet you can't get over the fact that he left you in here to go back to talk to her. he was on your tail last week trying to beg you to help him get rid of her and even shooed her out the unit harshly, what more is there to talk about?

truth to be told, this was how he first met you, or should he say saw you. it was the move in day, he had all the necessities for the week packed in a travel suitcase, with the other stuff to be brought in later on. he was waiting for the elevator in the lobby, more tense and anxious than ever to meet the girl he was going to be living with a good four years of his college life. hoping she'd not treat him like some stranger, or be someone impossible to get close to hash live with. along with little bits of curiosity and hopes again, that she'd be a pretty and sweet girl maybe someone help could form some kind of benefits with.

however never in a million years did he ever expect it to be the cute yet fierce girl in the elevator. to say he was flabbergasted would be an understatement, he was literally blown off his feet, scared or impressed, his confusion was massive. when the doors of the elevator had opened he had found you slapping a middle aged man,”fun? you think groping my butt ‘s fun, you sicko,” kicking him in the balls next. hard. jake had gulped at that, hard. heart on a pause. the look of feigned innocence on your face as you did all that. damn jake swears it was that moment he fell. maybe not romantically but you definitely got his dick hard.

you looked super cute, and you knew how to fight, jake thought he hit the jackpot when you turned out to be his roommate. pretty you were, definitely, and sweet wasn't even a question; you were sweet to him and you are a lot of sweet. the only thing that remains a mystery till now is if you'd taste as sweet. jake hopes he can find that out.

he returns a few minutes later, lips pursed in a small smile as he shuts the front door. it grows even wider when his eyes find you,“so your soy glazed potatoes,” he chuckles walking over to the kitchen and getting other things out.

“she called me a slut for living with a guy like you and i was in the midst of giving her a lecture on actually how good of a person you are-” you bang on the counter with a thud and turn around to face him,“and you dragged me in!” whinning in a pout that looked as upset as your furrowed brows.

jake glances over in amusement, halting to give you another grin as he boops your nose gently,“my darling candy, i’m only good to you,” the glare you throw his way only makes him snicker with adoration. the little flicker of bashfulness you feel making you break out in a smile which (thankfully, for you) jake doesn't notice.

“whatever, i’m gonna take a long shower. do not disturb me!” you leave in a rush afraid if you stay too long he'd see it all on your face.

ten minutes later, as you tiptoe to get your favorite shower gel from the shelf above the mirror, luck decides to remind you why you shouldn't ever stay away from jake sim. feet slipping on the wet floor, body colliding against the cold tiles in a thud loud enough to have jake come running.

“candy, you're okay? what happened? should i open the door? ‘m coming in,” his voice is laced with worry, snapping open the door to find you laying flat down, though to his relief not unconscious. he picks you carefully, bringing you to your room and seating you on the edge of the bed to check for any injuries. hands delicately caressing all over and asking if it hurts any where,”you're so clumsy, always getting me worried like shit,”

“language,” you giggle, trying to make him laugh and it works.

“sorry, just please be careful, okay?” his fingers brush back your hair as you give him a small nod,“do you feel pain anywhere?” another nod, and this one ticks his alarms.

“where!” your fingers reach out to press against the brooding crease between his brows, attempting to remove the frown from his face. and jake melts at that, feeling his heart flutter at your cuteness, god he loves this side of you so much.

“you little demon, look what happens if you don't shower with me,” laughing out together, oh how he wishes it were like this forever. and jake sim has never thought of a forever ever before.

a month passes by in the blink of an eye, your routines and relationship staying the same as always, classes, his soccer practice and your weekly cleaning day. but what seems to have changed is his routine of bringing over girls, the number alarmingly cutting down day by day (which currently sits at zero) and what you haven’t noticed- his display of affection towards you growing more and more. yet you think nothing special of it, assuming that perhaps now he got a grip over himself. which is partially true. jake thought of you as deserving someone better, so it was only right that he became better. and what better way than to start with quitting the position of campus’ resident fuckboy.

after an all nighter the previous day, coming back from your classes you get straight to bed. changing you clothes and getting tucked under the blanket from around eight in the evening. jake returns from his soccer practice later, unaware of the fact that you're already passed out. opening your door to let you know of his night out plans,“candy, i’m gonna go out with jay and sunghoon! make sure to have your dinne- oh you were sleeping? i didn’t know i’m so sorry candy,” he mumbles out in a soft whisper towards the end, supressing a smile watching your sleepy figure under the covers. trying to rub out the drowsiness from your eyes; heavy blinking and a small pout, his cute girl.

“it’s okay no need to get up, go back to sleep, i’ll be back in the morning,” approaching the bed as you lay back down, he pats your head in a 'sleep well’ before leaving.

it's probably past midnight when you wake up to constant ringing of calls. fumbling around for your phone in a daze only to find a dozen calls from an unknown number and a bunch of texts from the same. it's jay, asking you to get jake from the bar they're at. saying the guy's refusing to go back with anyone that's not you: whining for your presence and making it hard for his two friends.

'where is my candy?’ jay and sunghoon are sick and tired of hearing it all night.

by the time you get him back to the apartment, it's three and your bones hurt from the weight of his body leaning all over you. it doesn't help that all he does is giggle and throw himself over you. there's been a lot of times you have seen him drunk, probably more than a dozen, but he's never looked as wasted as today. sunghoon told you it's because he drank way more than usual, and unbeknownst to you that you are the sole reason, you wonder of the things that plague his mind to the extent of drinking so much.

dragging him into his room you have him sit on his bed, going through his closet and getting him a pair of sweatpants and the first shirt you can grab. “come on yunie, get changed,” you hand him the clothes, turning away when he takes everything off nonchalantly. even though he likely would rather want you to look, from the many times he's said it before ‘why’re you looking away, candy it's all for you,’ his exact words. the bane of your existence.

after he's changed, you wipe the sweat off his body with a wet towel as much as you can. giving him a glass of water before leaving for your room when he grabs your wrist and stops you with his puppy eyes.

in the morning, around noon jake is the first one to wake up and having no memory of the previous night besides the fact that he was drunk. he sits at his desk chair, hands in his hair, watching you sleep on the other side of his bed, clad in his shirt. it’s like he feels everything is over and done from here. he did what he swore never to do, this was the very first thing he pinned on his mind as an important note: not using you even if he has very obvious feelings for you. he tugs on his hair in frustration, angry at himself for not staying in his lane when drunk. with his head hung in guilt, he doesn't notice you stirring awake, sitting up at the sight of his hunched figure.

“yun? are you okay? is the hangover severe? should i make you something for it?” startled at your soft voice, he flinches visibly. a thousand scenarios running through his mind and not one ends up good.

“you don’t even know any hangover recipes,” jake mumbles almost inaudibly.

“i can just search on the internet and try my best, it’s not like i’ll give you anything inedible,” you teaee, trying to lighten the heavy atmosphere you feel in the air.

it takes him a moment to speak again, sounding as miserable as he has never before,“candy i’m,” he halts, gulping to hold back the lump in his throat,“i’m sorry, i really didn’t mean to, i don’t why i, it's all my fault,” he stops again, leaving you confused and dumbfounded,“what are you saying? what apology?” it is when his eyes shift to stare at what you’re clad in, staying there for a hard minute when you get a rough idea of what he could be thinking of. your cheeks grow hot at the realization, shaking your head when unholy images pop up in your subconscious.

but the butterflies fly away just as fast as they came as his words dawn uppn you. even if it didn’t happen the fact that he wouldn’t mean it, want it, regret it has something in you twisting in pain, are you so bad? or that he actually really thinks of you as his little sister? that you read his affections wrong, assumed his feelings differently? your heart breaks more than a little at that.

“why? is it because i’m not like the others you have been with? because i’m not like eunsang? or because i’m not her? the one you were smiling so hard after talking to? are you dating he-”

“that’s the problem! you’re not like her! you’re not like anyone i've known before! you’re special and i’m afraid i’ll lose you, things will change and just i’ll have to get over you without even getting a chance,” it's the first time he's ever raised his voice at you, and the first time ever he's sounded so desperate, weak and dejected. so vulnerable.

the split moment of sadness dissipates with every word that sinks in. the revelation of a(n after)drunk confession. the fact that you're a different kind of special to him, that he would want a chance to be with you, that he's afraid to lose you. you supres the urge to laugh when it all settles into your understanding. having a better grasp over the bigger picture. your steps are slow and calculated as you walk over to him, sitting across his lap and cupping his cheeks in a fleeting breath of courage. his eyes almost bulge out when you brush your lips lightly against his, mumbling softly,“nothing happened, but if you still want i can give you a chance, it’s going to be hard though tolerating me, think wisely,” you giggle and jake malfunctions for an instant before grabbing you in a tight hug, burying his face into the crook of your neck.

“of course, of course i do want it, i’ve always wanted it,” chanting out in a trance.

“your lips tasted like watermelon,” he mutters out some time after, eyes locking with yours in an intense pull. still in a daze that out of all the bad things that could've happened it was none. literally none plus you perhaps wanting him just as much as he wants you.

“i had some in the morning before you woke up, anyhow yours taste like alcohol and your breath is horrible, go and freshen up,” you push at his shoulder, getting off him to leave the room to cook something. probably (as you said) a recipe searched up on the web, hopefully edible enough for a hungover person.

when he comes out later, all showered and back to the jake you know: the one who likes his hair slightly messy and almost never in a shirt. “why were- are you wearing my shirt then?”

“you practically begged me to last night while sobbing for i don’t know what reason,” he's a bit flustered at that, but hey, it's what got him here, you gotta do what you gotta do.

“candy, you wanna go out tonight? jay and sunghoon wanted to hang out but i don't wanna leave you so i said i’d bring you along,” jake asks, knocking at your door.

it takes you a little over a minute to open up but jake's does not mind it at all for obvious reasons, his jaw comically falling to the floor when you walk out in your tiny little blue sundress and the shade of lipgloss he was dying to see you in. you're unreal.

“yes! i heard you on call earlier,”

“oh my god candy, gimme a princess twirl,” the amount of desire he feels for you right now is unfathomable. biting his lips at the sight of your lace panties underneath that faintly flash him in the mini twirl you do. can you get any hotter?

“just fifteen minutes and i'll be ready,” he got ten minutes to do something about the boner he just popped, and it's more than enough to have him rub one out with what he just saw. maybe add a little hint of imagination and wondering what you'd sound like if he were to touch you down there. especially given the fact that the likelihood of it happening were through the roof now. you almost kissed last week, anything could happen at this point. and jake's dick gets impossibly sensitive at the odds of it.

at the restaurant, jay and sunghoon sit in an awkward silence, watching you both be all over each other. when they agreed for jake to bring his girl along, they didn't expect it to be so bad.

“um jake talks a lot about you,” sunghoon says trying to start a conversation that he knows probably wouldn't go anywhere.

“he does? that's so sweet,” you smile, giggling over something jake whispers in your ear, his hand palming over the plush of your exposed thighs,”what do you wanna eat?” sunghoon nerves feel boiled at the way jake completely skips over his attempt to talk to you. while jay sips at wine, agonizingly slow knowing this is how it's gonna be from now on. their friend is a changed man.

“i have this picture of jake from middle school, you'd love to see it i promise,” a little tipsy, sunghoon's persistence to put himself in the equation albeit admirable, annoys the fuck out of jake, scowling at the other well of aware of the so called picture he wants to share.

“jay man, take care of him. candy and i are going home,” jake gives them a tight lipped smile, holding your rather drunk self (it's just wine you had said)

“see you later ca- y/n,” at first jay leans in for a friendly hug but— nevermind. the way jake stares at him is scarily weird.

jake makes sure to have you sit on the couch before he leaves to get you water but you're sprawled out on the floor when he comes back. mumbling something about how cool the tiles feel against your skin,”come on you should drink some water,” jake pulls you up on your ass, sitting cross legged on the floor beside you. his hand softly holds the back of your head as he brings the glass to your mouth.

“alright say, what did you wanna say?”

“i wanna kiss you,” if jake thinks the pout on your lips is the cutest thing ever then the words you say must have to be the hottest thing ever. how can a simple word like kiss make his heart flutter so bad? and it's not even lust at this point.

he fulfils your wish without a thought, leaning in to capture your lips in a gentle kiss. sucking on your bottom lip a second long before he pulls away and boops your nose. no tongue and no other intentions. the after taste of your gloss lingering in his mouth.

“let me tell you a secret,” you whisper out, moving over to his lap, knees on the floor each side.

“i knew you stole my kuromi panties,” he's shocked you know about it, he made sure to be extra careful with it, though his nasty ass was internally hoping you'd catch him.

“mhm, i do have it with me but it's not really wearable now,” he did not see this becoming something sexual but the moment you brought up the panties, you might as well have brought up his dick. man practically re-lived every single time he used it to jerk off, all those orgasms coming to life at once.

“you need to punished!” you whine,

“what do you wanna do?” and jake feels his dick get harder at that.

“can we kiss again?” oh my god, you make him feel so fuzzy and horny at the same time, it's unbelievable. in the guide of jake sim: to make him horny is relatively easy, to get him all fuzzy is once in a lifetime and to get him both at the same time is impossible. yet you do it so effortlessly.

jake answers you with his lips against yours again, relishing in the feeling of them on his own. all those times he wondered of how it'd feel like to kiss you seemed so lame now that he actually did. no imagination could ever come close to way he feels right now. his hand comes up to cup the side of your neck, his grip firm as he pulls away for a moment,”i wanna love you so much and take you on cute little dates and buy you all the food you want and fuck you so hard you only remember my name,”he mumbles against your lips in a bit whisper, letting you take a breath before he dives right back in. this time he lets his tongue slide in, rubbing against your own for a short while only to pull back and go for another trying to keep your lips pressed together for as long as he could. finally pulling away when he feels you push against him a little too roughly, a crawl of shudders all over his skin at the roll of your hips against his bulge.

“wan’ you to fuck me too,” you whine, this time desperately.

“fuck candy, you're drunk we shouldn't be doing this,” he reminds, failing miserably to hold himself back. his hands keep twitching to just grab your hips and grind you down on his dick until you're both cumming together.

“i’m not, i swear. i just drank a little because i couldn't have done this all sober,” even through the layers of clothes, jake can feel your neediness dropping with the way you roll your hips harder against him. speeding up when you think he's pushing you away, but he's just grabbing you closer by the waist. he can't deny how wanted he feels right now, feeling like he'd explode any second. the fuck were you so horny for him?

“are you sure this is okay?” he asks again. no matter how bad he's dying to fuck you, he'll never do it if you don't to.

“‘s okay, please yunie,” you feel his hands slide along your thighs and in between your legs. fingers faintly brushing over the wet patch on your panties in a sharp inhale. he grazes two fingers against your clit, testing the waters. rubbing harder when he feels your breathing pick up it's pace, switching to spank your clit impossibly fast having lost control at the sound of your wanton whimpers.

“don’t move and take it baby,” jake growls, pushing you flush against his chest, making your back arch more and more into him. tits bouncing right up in his face as he bends down to nibble as the exposed skin between them.

he stops for a moment only to push your panties to the side and touch you raw. rubbing rougher and so intense, your legs feel number from pleasure,”has anyone touched you like before?” his jaw clenches hard, eyes dark with want as they remain fixated at the sight of his hands on your pussy. fuck he finally knows what touching you feels like.

“ngh— no, fuck!” and it boosts jake's ego through the roof, he doesn't think he's ever felt as horny as he feels right now. the thought of being the first to touch you in your princess parts, the first you have seen you putty like this, the first to be the one to get you like this. fuck, fuck, fuck! he feels so turned on it's literally inhumane. precum oozing out his tip with every twitch of his dick.

“mm, gonna put my fingers in you,” you feel one of jake's fingers press into you, sliding inside easily with how dripping wet you are. the pornographic moan you let out when he slowly slips in another and curves up has his dick twitch so damn hard he thinks he just came untouched. you sound so cute yet so fucking hot, his mind is in a spiral of everything he wants to do to have you moan like that again and again until you're so drunk on pleasure, you only want him all the time.

“shit you're so tight and warm, can't imagine how good you'd feel around my cock,” his eyes keenly hooked on the way you raise your hips to meet the thrusts halfway,”y-yun, ‘s feels too g-good ah,”

“fuck you're so hot and so perfect for me,” his words travel straight to your core having you clench tight around his fingers and all of a sudden you find your oragasm hitting you as violently as jake continues to run you through it, fast and painfully pleasurable. enamoured and obsessed with the way your doe eyes struggle to stay open, mouth parting in a loud whine, back arching and hips shooting up. god you're a piece of art and jake doesn't think he's ever gonna want anyone other than you.

he immediately stands up with you in his arms, walking over to the kitchen counter and placing you gently on the cold marble. his fingers run through your hair in a soft caress, tucking in the messy strands behind your ears,”you sure you want this? we can stop here if you want. just say the word and i’ll stop,”

“wan’ yun to be my first,” you whimper wearily, jake feels his heart skip a couple of beats. your first, he wants to be your last too and you to be his last.

”gonna make you cum so much harder on my cock,” he places his hands on your thighs in a tight grip and forces them apart fervently. he so damn wants to eat you out but he also wants to feel you cum around his cock, it's a hard choice to make but his cock feels so angry and heavy slick from all the precum he shot out each time you whimpered or moaned or whined, if he'd wait to get his dick wet he'd probably actually come untouched from your sounds and reactions alone. and only god knows(jay too oops) how bad jake sim wants the first time he cums with you to be deep inside you. so much so that he might develop a kink of getting you knocked up (nope you're too young for that!)

he takes his pants off in a snap, practically ripping his boxers along with it, grabbing his rock hard dick, throbbing and red at the tip and trusting into his fist a couple of times. breathing heavy at the way you watch him with your lips between your teeth. he wonders how good it'd feel to watch you touch yourself while he does the same, cumming together with your eyes locked. but he probably doesn't have that kind of self control to just watch you touch yourself, when he can do it himself?

he taps his tip against your clit for a hot minute sliding it along your folds in a strained groan. you're so embarrassing wet, it's like jake could shove himself inside immediately and your you'd hardly feel pain for a while. however, holding back his desires, he pushes into you slowly, holding your body close and stroking your back soothingly,”let me know when i can move,” a tender kiss at your forehead, trying to make sure you know you have the say it in.

jake groans as you give him the go seconds later,”mhmmm candy⁠— baby,” moaning soft and lustful as he pulls out till the tip and thrusts all the way in. your insides feel so warm and gummy, walls clenching around him crazy tight. he thinks he'll lose his mind and end up cumming embarrassingly fast like a teen getting pussy for the first time. the way he feels the pleasure throb in his veins so intense all over his body, it's almost numbing.

your hands loop around his neck, fingers scratching at his back as he pounds into you rough, his pace hard and fast pushing all his body weight against you.

“don't think i can ever get enough of you,”

the sight of the thin straps of your dress slipped to the sides, tits almost spilling out of the front gets jake going, fueling him to grab at you anywhere and everywhere his hands can possibly go,”tell me im dreaming fuckkk— i've wanted you for so long, can't count the number of times i've jerked off to the thought of having you like this, so pretty and dumb under me,” all those evenings when you roamed around the unit in the shortest shorts and the smallest crops, driving him mad shit insane, having to sneak off into the bathroom multiple times. fisting his cock hard, groaning and biting back his moans as he got off to the thought of you, while you sat all unaware and innocent on the other side of the wall.

he stops abruptly, pulling out in a frenzy and turning you around on your heels and pushing you by the back of your neck to lay against the cool granite. one hand going down to grab at your thigh and hook it up on the counter, drooling at the way your pussy glistens from the angle. he shoves his dick back in without a warning, feeling your ass collide against him harsh yet fervid.

you both pant in rasps when his cock hits a sensitive spot inside you. he shifts to angle himself just right to repeatedly brush against that spot and you mewl out loud at that, so loud your neighbours probably know what you're up to.

“fuck i can't stand not seeing your cute face,” jake bends over to grab you by your throat, pulling you up and flush against him, head resting back at his shoulders as he forces to look at him, fingers gripping your jaw softly,”eyes on me, okay baby?” grunting from deep within his chest, a wild grin on his face as he watches you get lost in ecstasy,”i’ll get you addicted to my cock,” just like how addicted he already is with your pussy and everything about you.

his other hand reaches up to tug the front of your dress down, groping up one of your tits, a silk touch to see your reaction. loving the way it's so obvious how sensitive you are there. mouth parting open with you in sensuous gasps as he twists your nipple harshly, rubbing the tip with his thumb. your walls clench a little too hard and your back arches off as you push your hips back into him, the tell tale signs of you getting close,”my baby's gonna cum for me?”

holding your jaw to have your eyes trained on him, he unexpectedly inserts his thumb in your mouth pressing against your wet tongue, your red swollen lips too tempting to resist,“fuck yes, show me how pretty you cum,” you mumble out a series of incoherent words in hazy chant.

the hand on your breast slips down to your lower abdomen pressing rashly against his bulge, feeling faint movement of his cock deep inside you. fuck you're so small and delicate. his hold on you tightening as his calloused fingers find your neglected bud, rolling it in quick, tight circles. it's so painful yet you feel so good, tears wailing down your cheeks as your orgasm crashes hard, overwhelming and violent, thighs trembling and pussy clenching uncontrollably. jake's continues to rub your clit, helping you ride out your high. eyes fluttering shut, and swallowing thickly at the sensation of you creaking over his sensitive length, cock throbbing impossibly hard.

jake refuses to stop even after you have come down,”one more candy, i know you can do one more for me,” hips hammering into you at full force, and lips finding yours in ragged breaths. and it dawns on you what exactly you have gotten yourself into when you feel the two of his fingers protruding at your entrance, trying to push in beside his cock,“if you try to close your legs i'm gonna punish you,” he warns making you whine into his mouth.

in a flash he turns your body to face his, quickly shoving his cock and fingers back into you. his other hand spanking the skin of your ass and kneading it a soft caress after. he eyes hypnotized at the view of you taking him in, a white ring of your cum adorning the base of his cock. he spits at your clit, once again toying with the engorged bud, pinching and flicking,”“gonna make you cum until you pass out, fuck i really wanna do that⁠—” your hand darts out to grip at jake's wrist, feeling too overwhelmed with hypersensitivity. wanting to shy away but the pleasure’s so good you can't bring yourself to push him away.

“but it's your first time,” jake mumbles between hoarse grunts.

before you can even realize it yourself your third orgasm courses through you vehemently. body jerking and twitching, almost falling over if not for jake's hold. jets of cum gushing out as you moan loud.

feeling you spill down his cock, all warm and tight, his brutal rhythm falters,”fuck- ‘m gonna cum,” eyes locking with yours as he thrusts once, twice and then stills, burying himself deep, streams of cum shooting out. hot spurt after spurt, swollen cock twitching against your walls. goosebumps all over, his legs quiver from how hard he came.

he stays quiet and motionless for a while, his arms wrapped around your shaking body. breathing in the scent of your shampoo, trying to calm his pounding heart and cock.

“you good candy? i’m sorry, i think i went a little rough on you,” you nuzzle into him in quiet,’its okay’ as he strokes your head, leaving fluttering kisses over your face. picking you up by the thighs he brings you to your bed, laying you down and gently pulling out. groaning at the way all your mixed cum oozes out, pretty little hole clenching around nothing.

exhausted, you let your mind drift, feeling the drowsiness kick in while jake bends between your legs with a wet towel. whining wearily, when his lips wrap around your nub in a suck, the wet sensation of his tongue against your clit like a shot of electricity,”sorry, baby just had to do that once,” he knew he didn't just call you candy for nothing and he was right. grining sheepishly as he wipes the rest of the cum off, cleaning you all up.

“you're nasty,” you manage to whisper out.

“only for you,” the touch of his body is hot and comforting, arms around your waist cuddling closely(and half naked).

“let's shower together in the morning, wanna eat you out so-”

“jake!”

“what? it's the truth!”

the following around four in the afternoon before jake has to leave for his soccer practice, you approach him on the couch, as always re-watching an episode of vincenzo. you haven't talked much about labels, but it's known to everyone that you're sorta together. more like jake is taken by you. his friends weren't too surprised to know about you both, it was obvious jake had the hots for you and from the little hangout at the restaurant they figured it all worked out for him.

“incoming, pocky!” you sit beside him with a banana flavored pocky stick between your teeth, leaning in teasingly.

“oh you want me so bad,” he plays along inch closer and biting it off in a snap, lips barely brushing against yours.

pulling you onto his lap with your back pressed into his chest, he locks you in place, chuckling at the way you attempt to escape. his fingers twirling the ends of your hair as you surrender in seconds, switching to watching the show absent-mindedly,”my parents wanted to meet you,” he drops the bomb, tracing random letters on your skin to distract of the fact that he just mention a meeting with parents.

“as my roommate, actually,” quickly adding the important point, fingers poking at your cheeks like jello.

“so suddenly though?” you think back on all the things you have ever done to him, for them to want to see you. perhaps they think of you as a snobby girl who’s indulging their son’s already unpleasant habits.

“they’ve actually been wanting to meet you for the past three months, i was putting it off but now summer break is starting next week and i have no more excuses to give,” hugging you, he rests his head on the curve of your neck, breathing in the smell of watermelon that surrounds you after you had basically devoured a whole at lunch. “if you don’t want to then you don’t have to, i’ll talk to them,” he assures, not wanting you to feel obligated to agree, or force yourself despite being uncomfortable.

“no it’s okay, we can go meet them. how long will the drive be?” fumbling with his red knuckles, your mind wanders off to when he fingered you, growing hot and embarrassed all of a sudden. hardly listening in on his answers.

when jake leaves for his soccer practice, you find time to complete the trivial chores around the house. watering the plants with a pout, missing jake more than ever. you have completely different majors and you are not in any clubs either to stay after classes. the only time you spend together being the one at the apartment which is also cut down by his frequent practice sessions, sometimes in the morning during weekends and normally most evenings on weekdays. it makes you ponder on whether you should try out for any club, after all these years doing something else besides studying. but you have no idea what you should consider, having no knowledge on which clubs you could be eligible to join.

it takes you two whole weeks and a bunch of outfit checks to find yourself on your way to meet jake's parents. feeling almost weird and exhilarating at how his parents and his older brother welcome you. treating you so well even though they recognize you as nothing more than just his college apartment roommate who helps fix his laptop and tolerates the boy knowing the kind of womanizer he is. appearing more as a meeting with in-laws when you jake and you are not even official yet, more so they have no idea of what's going between you two.

they try their best to make you feel at home. during the lunch as jake had told them beforehand, his mother had a few sweet dishes prepared for you, coddling you just as jake does back at your unit. they talk to you about casual things including your likes and dislikes, what major you are in, whether jake treats you well, if you have any complaints regarding his behavior. it doesn’t feel as awkward as you as thought it would and you didn't have to put on any act as you prepared yourself to do.

in the beginning of your roommate journey, his accent, his voice was the first thing to attract you but slowly as you explored his personality you came to like him for more than just what attracted you to him. now you as you spend time with people closest to him, you understand where he got it all from. the sweet person he is, which you never expected a fuckboy to be, you didn’t even have an ounce of hope that he’ll acknowledge your presence in the apartment when you got to know about his playing around conduct. yet he turned out to be the sweetest boy you’ve ever come around in your life ( and the nastiest perhaps, )

when you are sitting alone with his brother, while jake is away downstairs to bring you something sugary to eat, his brother takes it as a chance to share his thoughts,“you know until i heard him call you candy a while ago, i was under the impression that 'candy’,” he quotes it specially with a movement of his fingers,“is supposedly a cheerleader fling of his after i saw the contact name showing up when he got a call the last time he was here,” giving you a sly look as he catches sight of jake approaching,“turns out it’s you, i never knew he is the type to give such sweet, unique petnames,”

before you leave in the evening, jake makes sure to let them know that you’re toegther, and that he’s not playing around this time. he’s willing to give effort into it and change his usual ways of living, to be better for himself and as well as for you.

on your way there you had thought of a lot things, had a lot of assumptions and expectations. even prepared yourself to hear things that’ll stick to you not so positively. but what stays in your mind now is completely unexpected and opposite of what you had internally composed yourself for. it’s all you can think of in the car and after you’re back in the comfort of your familiar apartment.

cheerleader, not a bad idea—

“oh my god candy, you're gonna be the death of me!” jake pulls you away, dragging you to the back of the bleachers, his cock already rock hard and throbbing with need.

“don't you like it? i thought cheerleaders dressed like this,” you pout at him, fiddling with the ends of the literally shortest skirt of your closet.

“i love it baby, but you can't just show up to practice like that, how am i gonna be able to concentrate when all i can think of you is fucking you,” he groans scanning over your figure again and again, it's like you brought out a hidden desire he didn't even know he had. he'd win every game for you if you were to cheer by the stands like this, the adrenaline of getting to ruin your perfect outfit and your perfect makeup after, putting him on a winning streak.

“teach me to suck you off,” jake loses his mind when you get down on your knees, pushing your hair out of the way and looking up at him through your lashes, doe eyes driving him crazy.

“shit baby, i will,” oh he's so going to corrupt you.

[lavender---sunshine]

Me, scrambling on hands and knees, desperately grabbing hold of the scrap of happiness and energy my brain will spare me in the gaps between migraines and crippling depression long enough to make myself a home cooked meal and some banana bread: Am I... better than everyone else?

[onysfavreader]

Random hc of being Ony's hyperfemblack!wife

You getting spoiled way to much but Ony who doesn't mind because his girl deserves the universe and more

Ony who can never have enough pictures and videos of you on his phone because he is quick to show you off at any chance you recording little maintenance vlogs for your photo shoots together

Ony who just loves you so much and never want to not see you smile

Ony being the only one to help you handle your emotions and make you feel better because he knows you can't help but be so emotional "Shh baby tell me what's wrong" "What happened ma why you look so upset"

Picks you up if you try to walk away from him when you're upset

Ony letting you decorate bc you're helping each other create your dream lives and that included giving you your dream pinterest house and closet lmao

You being the only one who gets to see Ony's soft side after you spent forever trying to get through to him like he put you through the worst when you first started talking but now he makes up for it every day and you brag about it to yourself because it took you forever to get him to that point

You not being any better in the beginning of your relationship those half assed ‘situationships’ could never prepare you for your relationship with Ony your the reason ony’s patience and trust for you is as high as it is

You two giving golden retriever and black cat energy Ony doesn’t look like he likes anyone and doesn’t but is the sweetest ever once you really get to know him especially to you and you looking the sweetest on the outside but you’re are worse then people think Ony is

Ony supporting you through everything and you doing the same even if you don't know exactly what he's doing you trust him

You walking around wrapped in a robe or one of many blankets almost everyday bc your always cold until Ony caught on buying you hoodies and jackets in his size just to see how cute you look when they cover so much more of your body than his

Ony giving you all the hugs kisses and praises he can because he knows you fiend off his attention and will throw the worst fits when you don't get it

You holding onys two fingers instead of his hand bc he's so big

Ony who lifts double your weight on a bad day this and just picks you up and you love it until he pisses you off "Put my ass down now" you shout trying to push him away "Why you not talking to me ma what's wrong" "Boy fuck you" "We gotta work on the mouth of yours" "Ony put me down" You laughed as he carried you to your bedroom “Don’t laugh now” “Baby I’m sorry” “I don’t want to hear none of that ma”

You absolutely loving Ony and the life you've built together

You're only piece of gold jewelry is an anklet with an 'o' charm and you refuse to take off even after he offered to get it in silver

Buying Ony just as many if not more flowers then he buys you

Ony and you having two dogs that are your babies. Ony's being some big 'scary' dog like a black pit bull that absolutely adores you and your a cute little brown toy poodle that Ony tries not to trip over bc they follow him almost as much as you follow him

You and Ony would have different "rooms" that would be your own space yours would be in the attic and he would have his in the basement but you two would still have your bed room

Ony never letting you know what he does for work but he keeps you safe and happy so you push your suspensions aside

You and Ony being the cutest together like your head over heels for him and he completely adores you

You being onys entire world and universe sun and all with the brightest smile on your pretty face and biggest heart

You both having to learn to love but know you want to be with each other for the rest of your lives so you push through the rough patches

Ony cooks and you bake

Ony doing the bathroom, dish, taking out the trash, fixing things, lawn work, bills, bugs, ect

You organizing, decorates, takes care of the dogs, cleans laundry, houses maintenance, groceries, ect

You and Ony who spoil each other rotten and love it

You doing Ony's hair and it's just a cute moment between you two every few weeks one of you will set up the bathroom before going to get the other then you'll sit on the sink with him in front of you most off the time it's quiet as Ony watches you concentrate

You rarely buying Ony gifts because you're always making something for him

You never being able to get enough of Ony

You have the prettiest garden with flowers herbs and fruits that you somehow managed to scared the dogs away from and plug!Ony will some times ask for help when growing his weed

- smut

Definitely the daddy dom of your my dreams he can be the sweetest softest dom ever or the scariest brat tamer but a pleasure dom either way

You almost being apillow princess bc Ony loves being the one to make you cum just by using you but you knowing how to suck it off the bone and neither of you can resist having him down your throat

You being a sweetheart but when you aren’t you can get a horrible attitude and smart mouth only Ony can handle because he knows how to keep your mouth full

Ony can't help but come inside of you so he pays for your birth control

Ony's 's so big and strong and so so big especially compared to you and you love it just the thought turns you on like just looking up at him while you standing next to him maybe holding his fingers and all you can do is squeeze your legs together

Ony fucking you in his hoodies

His voice is music to your ears but His praise will make you're eyes roll back and brain go dumb every time "Fuck you're so good baby just like that" "There you go ma"

You calling him daddy bc what is an Ony

Being each other's biggest eaters

Ony will pick you up and carry you away to your bedroom when he needs you and when you need him you’ll wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist or you’ll straddle his lap until he eventually gets it

You are definitely kinker then ony hands down and has to teach him things like

You liking soft intimate sex and Ony who fucks you so hard you go dumb almost every time And somehow he always knows which one you need

[hellsbelle999]

hello :D do you have any headcanons about the gang (if u need a specific character, then ponyboy) that you would like to share with the class >:)?

ty for being my first ask 🫶 !!

these aren't the best but hope yall enjoy nonetheless :-)

WC: 778 // not proofread

Pony:

I feel like he and Johnny are really into photography. They mostly show their pictures to each other rather than the rest of the gang, but will occasionally share what they're currently working on. when out and taking photos, they try to follow a specific theme - windows, people, trees - stuff like that.

Sometimes Ponyboy will ask Soda to take his film to be processed. If Sodapop sees a picture he really likes (usually of one of the gang since they hardly sit for photos purposely lol), he'll order an extra copy and will hang it up around the house.

Soda just thinks it's cute that pone takes pictures of everybody like that (so does Darry but he doesn't act like it, just silently thankful that someone's getting pictures of all of em)

Bro's gotta be bisexual fr

He's aware that he likes both guys and girls but doesn't question it much. Kinda nonchalant about it and wouldn't think it weird unless someone else said something.

Two-Bit:

Def steals little things for his mom and kid sister (and we love him for that)

Probably just stuff like makeup or a new doll - if he sees it and thinks they'll like it then he snags it right up, employees none the wiser

Partially motivated by him thinking he doesn't do enough for them and wants to make up for it

Since he doesn't have a job they're like hrmmm… ok.. But won't question it/confront him about it directly, just in passing sarcasm or jokes (but they know he stole it ofc)

His mom would come home from work, seeing Two's sister with a new toy or maybe a fresh loaf of bread and some jam on the counter, maybe a new lipstick on her nightstand

While she appreciates the trinkets, she wishes that he would contribute to the family a little more honestly...

Soda:

I imagine that he's really clean and cares for his personal hygiene a lot. Out of all of them, he smells the best lmao. Soda feels like his appearance is all he has going for him, and tries his best to keep up that reputation.

The week pony was missing he started slacking - missing showers, stopped combing his hair, and wore the same unkempt clothing as a result of the depression. All he wanted to do was lie in bed all day, but he had to keep carrying on, just barely.

Clearly this was way beyond his normal behavior and Darry and Steve tried getting him back on his normal routine (and failed).

He didn't freshen himself up until he read about pony in the newspaper, not wanting his kid brother to see him in that sorry state when he went to the hospital.

Darry:

Actually loves cats, but won’t admit it straight up lol.

He “finds” one on the street and decides to keep her. When asked about it, he just says they're easy to take care of so why not.

He loves how quiet and warm cats are, especially when he's reading the paper at the table before work, the house chilled by the morning's air.

Sometimes he'll fall asleep petting the kitty on his chest, leaned back in the recliner after a long day of work (lol such dad energy)

He accidentally teaches her to sit on his shoulders. Darry'd be making dinner or something and this scratchy old street cat would be sat atop his shoulder like a parrot, keeping a sure eye on whatever he's cooking.

Dal:

Slightly afraid of dogs.

He's fine with ones he's familiar with, like a friend's, but if he sees a stray on the street he's likely to hightail it outta there or walk as far away from it as possible

Random:

Before the wreck, I feel like the gang would go grocery shopping with Mrs Curtis 😭😭

Just imagine these scruffy lookin greasers trailing behind this completely unassuming lady. They definitely turn some heads, but the boys help her carry bags and such so she’s not complaining.

She knows they'll all be over for dinner at least one point in the week, so she asks them for suggestions and will send em off with leftovers if there's extras.

The gang being themselves would be goofing around obviously, until either a store employee has to step in and ask them to calm down or Mrs Curtis shoots the boys a glare that immediately sets them in line. … for the most part at least.

I imagine they’d (mostly two bit or dal) would pick up the most random, vile jar off the shelf and be like “hey can we get some uhhhhh … fermented pig’s foot?” which everyone responds with varying Hell No's and ewws

I've honestly got a ton more ideas but I'll cool it and stop here 😭 plz forgive any grammatical errors etc

[sunwarmed-ash]

WIP Thursday

@harrgrove helped me tear through some fucking AWFUL writers block this morning so im gonna post the next part that I have written for neverender as a treat 😘

you can read chapters 1-3 here!

Ch 4 preview

Billy stays at Steve’s as long as it takes for the bruises to heal. And then, without a word to anyone, he takes off. 

He doesn’t go far. He can’t yet. Mostly because he’s broke, but also because someone has to clean the blood off the floor before it sets for good if they want to have a prayer at selling the house. Now that Neil’s out of the picture, locked up without anyone to call and post bail, there’s nothing tying any of them to Hawkins.

-

It takes over three hours but finally, the wood is starting to resemble the chestnut color it began at. He’s exhausted, his hands burn and his knees ache, but it’s done. All final traces of Neil Hargrove have been scrubbed clean from the place. 

Billy could really go for a shower and an ounce of weed right now. Wash away and burn out all memories of the last two weeks. Even the good ones. Because Billy knows from personal experience, even the good ones don’t stay that way for long.  

Steve and Max will be pissed when they wake up and notice he bailed. Even more so when he finally does for good, but they will get over it. Move on. They already have once, and that was when there was still something left of Billy to miss. 

He digs into his jeans for his wallet. After all the fucking cleaning supplies, gas, and a 6 pack to make the day a little less miserable, Billy’s left with barely enough money for either lunch, or a carton of cigerettes. 

With a heavy sigh, he chooses the cigarettes and gets in his car headed north. 

-The Diner-

“Hey you! Got a table that just opened up, come on in.” 

Within seconds of his arrival, Debbie’s waving him inside with a friendly smile. Her motherly affection feels like an assault after spending so long face down over his fathers blood. He needs to do this now, before he loses his nerve. 

“Hey Debbie, I’m uh not actually here to eat.”

“Well, I know you can’t just be here to see little ol’ me,” she smiles, putting both painted hands on her chest for emphasis.

Any other day, he might play along. He doesn't have the energy today.

“I uh, I’m looking for work, actually.”

“And you wanna work here,” she asks, suspicions raised. 

The best part about Debbie's transplant status is she didn’t the full exent of Billy’s tragic backstory. Which is also why she’s realistically the only person in Hawkins who would hire him. He desperately needs the money. He’s gotta get the hell out of here. Fast. 

“I’ll take whatever you got.” 

Just then, their cook shouts as he burns himself on something for seemingly the last time. 

“MOTHERFUCKER! FUCK THIS PLACE! FUCK! STUPID CHEAP FUCKING EQUIPTMENT! I’M FUCKING DONE!” 

Debbie, Billy, and the 3 other customers watch as the line cook tosses off his apron, grabs his stuff and storms out in a huff. 

While every eye in the restaurant blew wide, Billy’s included, Debbie barely reacts. She just keeps chewing her gum, watching as the man leaves before returning her eyes to Billy.

“Know how to cook?”

[artful-aries]

Arguing With Them (Tighnari, Diluc, Beidou)

I am back after a hellish week in the trenches of corporate offices. I don’t even make enough to be considered white collar but I sure do gotta pull out the stops for corporate America. Anyway cooked up something after an idea I had on my business trip, enjoy!

Tighnari

It’s actually remarkably easy to get into arguments with him. Not that every argument is extreme or anything like that, but he is prone to bickering with those close to him and you are no exception

Arguments with him could spark over anything; whether he’s lecturing you on how best to take care of yourself while you traverse the forests of Sumeru, complaining about the mess you may or may not have caused in his herb supply, or on the rare occasion debating over philosophical beliefs

Tighnari is incredibly stubborn and won’t back down from a conversation that threatens to spill into an argument no matter what

This isn’t to say that he’s arrogant and thinks he’s always right, but he is extremely strong willed and isn’t willing to concede on many things, especially if they involve someone’s health or morals

His irritation will be blatantly obvious; his eyes are sharp as knives, and his ears and tail twitch involuntarily as he listens to your side of things

Even when extremely irritated with you, Tighnari is never going to raise his voice or stoop to insulting you. Though he disagrees with your point of view, the argument will never escalate more than a heated debate. The Akademiya gave him loads of practice with discussing topics with people he vehemently disagreed with in a classy way

Because of this, you will never feel threatened by his anger. Even when his hands clench or he takes a deep, agitated breath, there is never any negative energy emanating from him that would make you feel like he might snap and potentially hurt you

That being said, he isn’t going to mince his words during the argument. If he thinks what you’re saying is illogical or rash, he will not hesitate to tell you as such

It’s not that Tighnari doesn’t care about your feelings, because he definitely cares when he sees how much his words hurt you sometimes. Tighnari just would rather be completely honest with you rather than holding his thoughts back

Dishonesty eventually leads to seeds of doubt, which bloom into flowers of resentment. The last thing he wants is for your relationship with him to dissolve simply because he chose to not tell you everything that he was thinking

Because of the debate-like structure of arguments with him, it’s actually easy to deescalate the situation, especially if you tell him that his words upset and hurt you

This won’t make Tighnari change his firm opinions about whatever you were arguing about, but he will definitely take the time to reassure and comfort you if you’re upset. Couples don’t have to agree on everything, so he doesn’t want you to feel like arguments with him mean that he’s done with you

Diluc

For someone with a Pyro Vision, arguments with him start out very cold and distant. He avoids eye contact, adjusts his coat or his gloves almost obsessively, and his tone is flat and to the point

You will likely be the one to start arguments, more than likely criticizing how little time he spends with you, or perhaps how secretive he is with some of his whereabouts He still hasn’t found the right time to admit that he is the Darknight Hero

In an effort to not make you worry and to try and smother the flames of his own guilt, Diluc will initially be a bit dismissive of the argument, or try to avoid it entirely

He knows it isn’t the healthiest way to deal with things, but it’s quick and it works for a time. The guilt in his chest grows each time he does this, but he doesn’t know how to come clean

It’s not until you corner him and demand that he address your concerns that the fire is brought out of him. He can’t help but snap back at you, the pressure he’s putting himself under as well as the stress of disappointing you coming to a head

When you flinch at his unintentional booming voice, Diluc is crushed with even more guilt as he takes deep breaths to calm himself. The last thing he wants to do is lose his temper, especially toward you

He will make a point to keep his voice calm and quiet as possible so he doesn’t appear as intimidating, asking you to forgive him for lashing out

From there, the argument deescalates into a normal conversation about how you have been feeling about his behavior as of late

Diluc will do his best to address all of your concerns, or at least explain why he can’t waver in his choices or opinions

He isn’t the best at conveying how he feels, but he makes a point to hold your hand throughout the entire discussion. It serves as a silent promise to always stand by your side no matter what hardships come up

Beidou

Fights with her occur at a moderate amount, and are often very loud. It’s not that she’s yelling at you, per se, it’s more that she’s just yelling because of how much she’s feeling

Arguments are rarely over something frivolous unless she is drunk, but her drunken arguments can be laughed off and quelled simply by putting her to bed. When she’s sober, arguments tend to be more serious, and a recurring topic of discussion is safety; both yours and hers

It’s almost like you two take turns being concerned for each other. This time you’re scolding her to be more careful with her and the crew of The Alcor, and the next she’s practically breathing down your neck for going to Luhua Pool without her escorting you.

It’s obvious that you two care for one another, and get very heated when the other party is too stubborn to listen

It doesn’t take long for Beidou to be loudly lecturing you about how you need to take her with you when you travel since you can’t fight, or insisting that she knows exactly what she’s doing and that you don’t have to worry about her

Your lecturing irks her because she feels like you don’t trust her, and vice versa. It’s a never ending cycle

If you were to react poorly to her raised voice, Beidou will immediately apologize and try to lower her volume, but in turn she will be frantically pacing back and forth as you two argue. She has to let out her emotions physically somehow, whether it’s projecting her voice or moving to work out the excess energy

She does her best to not make you nervous as you both argue, but she understands that her energy when she’s irritated or upset isn’t always ideal. If it seems too much for you, she will leave to get some air, telling you to wait for her until she comes back

After having some time to cook off, Beidou will come back with her usual calm, unbothered demeanor and apologize for getting so worked up.

From there, she’ll listen patiently to your concerns and voice her own, making sure to give you small reassuring smiles as the two of you sort out your troubles

You drive her nuts sometimes, but she cares so much for you and doesn’t want to let you go for the world

[aimlesspixel]

I want to try and write a isat fanfic continuation so for now a first step on their new journey. Please give me your thoughts so I can improve!

The sun is warm, the smell of a fresh summers day wafts over, the darkless shades covering the field as your family walks alongside you. What a time to be alive huh? Vaugaurd is saved, you're free of the time loop, and your travels are picking back. The party back in Dormont was a good way to celebrate and you're glad for the downtime you got before setting off again with everyone.

Isabeau - "Madame, thanks again for getting the supplies we needed together yesterday." Odile - "It wasn't any trouble especially since they gave us so much as thanks for saving them."

They probably gave us a bit too much if you're being honest but it's nice that you won't have to worry about stocking back up for a while. You notice Mirabelle shooting you a glance and walk over.

Siffrin - "Something wrong?" Mirabelle - "N-no. I just wanted to see how you were feeling is all."

It has only been a few days since you managed to finally escape the time loop but after talking with everyone and expreiencing real days again you're feeling a lot better.

Siffrin - "I'm great honestly."

She glares at you for a moment as if trying to see through any lies you might have told before relaxing and smiling gently.

Mirabelle - "I'm glad, make sure to talk to me if you do start feeling bad, you promised after all." Siffrin - "I promise I won't leaf you hanging Mira." A slight smirk appears on her face. "Good."

Bonnie is as full of energy as ever. Actually they may have a more than before since you're all on your way to reunite them with their recently unfrozen older sister. What was her name again something with an N you're sure… Nico… Niel… Nille yes that was it Nille. The forest is finally coming into view which means you're about a sixth of the way to the next town. A pretty good pace if you all keep this up it'll only take a month to get to Bambouche.

It's pretty dark out now you've set up camp for the evening in a little clearing along the path. Bonnie's cooking up stew for everyone tonight. You sit on a log with Isabeau on your right as you eat.

Isabeau - "O-Oh Sif!"

He seems a little startled maybe you should have asked him but oh well he did just confess to you so he should at least be able to handle this much.

Isabeau - "H-how umm… how do you like the stew?"

It's a nice stew; hearty, warm, and delicious the spices compliment the meat well. "It's pretty tasty in fact I guess you could say…"

He looks at you with anticipation written all over his face. "that it's pretty stewpendous!"

He erupts into laughter - "YEAH YOU COULD HAHAHA!"

You catch Mirabelle giggling and Bonnie doing a small fist pump out of the corner of your eye. You enjoy the stew with everyone around the fire enjoying some light conversation. Finishing up you set your plate aside and Isa looks at you.

Isabeau - "Say Sif?"

He holds his hand out to you, you take it in kind and hear Mirabelle sqeak a little as you do.

"I was wondering… do you want a hat? I mean as your new clothing designer I've gotta know what my client needs so I wanted see if you need a new one seeing as we couldn't find yours even after talking to the head housemaiden."

Oh yeah now that he mentions it you have been missing it these last few days, it's kind of nice and kind of annoying not having it so it's a bit of a tough call you don't need it but it'd be useful too. You know whay if you're this torn you should ask Isa to make you a new one and just wear it as feels right. "I did wish for you to so... please do Mr.Amazing-funny-buff-clothmaster-Isabeau."

His cheeks turn a few shades darker "I'll make them the best you could ask for!" Even if it was the worst you'd seen you'd still wear them if Isabeau made them.

Odile sounding slightly exasperated - "Enough with the flirting you two. Clean your plates so we can all get some sleep."

[sagau-my-beloved]

Help. Since morning I just have one thing on mind, reverse sagau avian venti fluff 😭😭😭😭

- 🧩anon

I get it man I think about Venti's wings at least twice a day 😔😔

But you can't just say that and not share, gimme the avian Venti fluff pls

I'll go first, so Venti who's just constantly accidentally knocking things over with his wings in your little apartment, who gives you a sheepish smile and maybe a nerves laugh everytime he hears something else fall to the ground

Occasion he has the reflexes to grab it midair but for the most part you've just become accustom to the sound, he still feels bad if anything actually breaks though

In traditional courting manner he'd probably try really really hard to surround you in things you've shown some sort of a preference towards, like if you like soft things or purple things or shiny things, as soon as he sees something that meets that description it's immediately 'brain off retrieve item' mode, and then he'd get all excited when presenting it as you give him a confused or concerned look depending on how expensive the item is because he doesn't exactly have money to just splurge

Since it's pretty common for birds to have decreased energy in the winter months (and also canon that the Anemo Archon literally is believed to hibernate after Weinlesefest) Venti would probably want nothing more than to spend the whole winter in bed with you, and would absolutely whine and moan whenever you try to get up, especially if it's to go to work or really outside of the house at all

It's just so cold and unpleasant when you're not right there lying beside him, like a part of him is missing, he really doesn't understand how you can manage this level of productivity all year round or why you'd even want to when he's right there with open arms ready to hold you and watch movies or just cuddle all day

And he's absolutely not above just trapping you with his arms, legs, and even wings if it comes down to it, cause now he simply can't live without you being right there, it might as well be a physical need cause it's frankly impossible for him to be comfortable without you and that means he can't sleep at all, and that means he's gonna feel super tired and unpleasant later

When it's cold out is one of the rare times that you see him actually lethargic, which only makes him clingier than usual, gotta stay warm through body heat of course, in bed, away from people, with only each other, and did he mention no one else?

By contrast, in the spring and summer he'd be all over the place, dragging you halfway around the world because it's "nice out" and you "shouldn't waste it inside all day"

Still just as affectionate, that's not changing no matter what month it is, and still just as on alert towards other people, hanging out with other people a lot means that you might start preferring their company and he's not losing you to somebody else, which really just adds up to him turning the whole courting thing up to the extreme

And that means prepare to be serenaded in the most romantic ways he can conjure and also not have to do any of your own cooking for awhile, he'd probably be very unconsciously into keeping everything clean too because he's gotta prove himself as a good partner

Really Venti would just be a lot more clingy and would probably have a stronger urge to join you in a lot of your everyday activities, like eating, showering, working, and obviously sleeping, to the point where he purposefully waits and morphs whatever schedule he has around doing those things with you because they're just that important

Then I personally like to imagine his feathers fluffing up when getting caught off guard, like he just immediately goes into 'make yourself bigger' mode on instinct and suddenly you're smacked in the face by a wing

I can't stress this enough but he would love love love you touching his wings, no question about it just don't stop, it's a pretty surefire way to get him to just keep you in bed all day cause you could do it for hours and he still wouldn't be satisfied

But the cutest thing in the world just came to me, Venti accidentally making something that mimics a little chirp when happy, and then getting super embarrassed about it because that sound wasn't supposed to come out—

Sigh avian Venti need's to exist more as a general concept because I'm hooked, it's adorable and I'm so sad I can't find it anywhere else

[dragoon811]

I am so so tired

What is a rest? What is a good night's sleep? My oldest has a cold and is clingy. My youngest has gone from a kiddo with a good sleep routine and a nighttime cuddle to having the biggest tantrums EVER. I spent THREE hours last night getting her to bed.

I don't know how I stayed calm. I don't.

I say tantrum I mean shrieking "NO! YOU STUPID!" and kicking and hitting and running off and sobbing like she's being murdered and hiding under beds, in closets, etc. Like... please understand. She is a very sweet child. Frilly flannel nightgown with minnie mouse on it. Little wispy hair. Just a full-on nightmare.

And then I had to get the older to sleep. Because it has to be mommy. And she took another HOUR to go to sleep! T__T.

Like...I work full time. I do the grocery shopping. The meal-planning. Wrangling daycare and school. I do most of the cooking. I still have 2 loads of laundry to fold. By time I get the kids to bed? It's too late to vacuum so I pick stuff up by hand and put it in the garbage. I wish I had hardwood - at least I could mop at night. You look crazy, sweeping cheese off of carpet.

I come home and the List wasn't done. Put away laundry? I video'd everything - what it was, where it was. Closets and drawers are labeled. And there is still. laundry. not. put. away. OK. I'll just do it. Litterbox? Floor wasn't swept. Grab the broom and dustpan. Not enough litter put into the box. Do that, too.

Dishes? Hah! A paltry amount. A mountain awaiting wash. And the few that did get washed? Not properly clean.

Fill the diaper bag, make sure there's spare clothes. Wash out the lunch box. Brush hair. Eczema lotion. Style hair. Convince toddler to pick an outfit from the options presented. Meal-prep. School lunches- ensure they're allergy-friendly! School - events, check with teachers, return library books. Holidays! Gotta do valentines. Make sure snow pants are clean and dry. And coats. Don't forget to wash them once a week!

Change sheets. Clean couch cushion covers. Bath time! Let me clean your hair, clean your ears. Trim cats' claws. Play games to learn letters/words/taking turns. Color. Draw. Do Lego and playdoh to strengthen hand muscles.

Playdates/activities. Grocery shopping. Gas in the car. Bills. Clothes for children who seem determined to destroy or outgrow everything. Wear your bra til it falls apart because they're expensive.

Try to reach out to your friends at least once a week so you can TRY to maintain those relationships. It's usually a 5-minute phone call on your drive home because that is the only time you have to yourself.

Be constantly sick. Cry over the price of medicine. Cry over the cost of groceries. Try to find deals. This may mean driving all over town and four different stores.

And all of this dragging two kids and a husband you're taking care of but who would rather play video games for 10 hours and has memory problems. Wonder how much is the illness and how much is incompetence.

Get everything done. Sit...no energy for a book. No energy for a movie or show. No energy to knit or crochet. No energy to write.

Does...does it ever end?

[nofoxgiven]

I think I’ve been just living with some kind of chronic fatigue for a few years now and been mostly unaware of it because of the multitude of bullshit in my life

But like… I’ve realized lately what an insurmountable task most daily little things have become for me, like cooking, cleaning, even hobbies and things I enjoy

Like I have just enough energy every day to focus on work enough to not get fired but the moment I clock off I’m drained even though I’ve been at a desk all day

I go to cook dinner and 9/10 it’s a box of Mac and cheese or pizza rolls because I just cannot be fucked to actually cook and when I try I end up on the floor crying from how tired and overwhelmed I am

I didn’t used to be like this. I used to cook with my friends or alone almost every day, I’d drive home on my lunch break to make lunch then go back to work, come home and cook again

The idea of cooking two meals in one day feels like a fucking fantasy now

And I don’t even know when it started. I’m guessing some time around when I got really agoraphobic and quit my job, I think I just slowly stopped doing things as I lost energy for it and now it’s a struggle to get the energy to do a single extra thing above “bare minimum to survive”

Idk man I don’t feel like this is a health issue, at least not in a physical sense unless I’m dealing with long Covid and unaware, I’m guessing it’s some kind of burnout? But that almost scares me more because you gotta rest to recover from burnout and I’m not sure there’s anything else I can cut out for more “rest”

[aajjks]

tc koo oh i will make sure everyone knows you’re mine. that, i swear on. right near your heart? hm.. i do like that idea. my name protecting what beats for me. oh god yes, i wanna be covered in nothing but your marks.. all i can imagine is how good you’d be to me when i let you mark my skin with your love.. yes a janitor baby.. i’d like to let him know to clean it up before it gets to late, you know how i feel about letting things sit for to long.. i was cooking for you my love but i cooked for you after i painted.. i don’t want you touching the paint i left behind my baby.. not even the paint is worthy of your touch, only me. oh baby, i told you they was messy canvas. i wanted it to be a surprise for you but.. i’m not proud of it, not just yet.. lemme work on it and then i’ll show you, okay? maybe when i feel more confident we’ll paint together, l.. that’s something i’ve been wanting to do with you for some time now but i’ve had second thoughts.. just lemme practice and we’ll have a little painting date, yeah? gimme a kiss you handsome devil! oh god.. i just want to do the absolute naughtiest things to you.. but i need to go real quick, okay? no baby, you know how much i hate messes! if i don’t have him clean it now it’s all i’m gonna think about.. oh no no no, i put a lot of work into making your food and you’ve been up here all day my love. you haven’t ate anything have you? don’t lie to me jungkook. as your wife it’s my job to make sure all of your needs are met. starting with the most important. food! i can feel you baby.. i know it hurts but you gotta eat first. food is one of the most important things a human needs.. how will you be able to keep up with me tonight if you don’t have something to eat that’ll keep your energy up? ah! jungkook! you’re gonna pick up all those papers before you get to be inside me. tell you what.. lemme go do what i gotta do really quick while you pick up your papers! and we’ll have sex right here in your office before we go and eat dinner, okay? i’ll late you do whatever you want but you’re gonna clean this up first my love

“That excites me you know, a lot of people in the palace think that you don’t love me, your marks will let them know that you love and only me, oh yn then you should do it tonight, carve your name into my skin, oh I cannot wait…. Yes my heart only beats for you. And I want to mark you up too. Dongmin really thought that he could have you and now he’s rotting in the dungeon.. yn I don’t like this, I’m not a patient man, I don’t understand why you’re so bothered about the mess.. you’re not hiding anything are you? D-Do you plan to leave me? Oh my God…. You’re going to run away aren’t you, I WONT LET YOU- y-yn please.. if you really want to leave, take me with you! WHY CANT I COME WITH YOU?!? Oh I’ll teach you how to paint, my mother taught me… I’ll teach you. You want a kiss, I’ll give you a good kiss. Yn…. You’re so stubborn you know that? Can’t you make it quick? Oh my baby… you must’ve put a lot of effort into making it for me… yes…. You’re my wife…. I can’t get enough of you saying it…. You take such good care of me…. Yes I want to have stamina for you… you’re right I need to eat so I can please you right…come eat with me…. You’ve been so distracted these days yn, always running away, what’s gotten you so busy? NOOO- I-I mean okay… I’ll pick them up- see? REALLY? okay…. I trust you… but please don’t leave me…”

[jodilin65]

Just when I thought it was over, things got bad again. I didn’t get sick but I had the worst acid reflux I’ve ever had in my life last night. My throat didn’t just burn but it hurt like hell! I was delayed getting to sleep because I had to sit propped up on my wedge pillow which is very hard to sleep on. Eventually, I was able to lie down flat and then settle onto my stomach so I could get into a deeper sleep. I was afraid that if I tried to sleep lying down sooner, I would choke.

Sometimes I really wish I would just get something that would kill me! I’m so sick of the never-ending fatigue and health issues!!! I almost feel like I’m being held prisoner in my own home. Yes, I’m a homebody 95% of the time but I would still like to do things at times. Every event I want to attend I happen to have to sleep through. Really wanted to give blood at the clubhouse on the 6th but I’m not going to be up before they’re done if I’m even feeling well enough. It’s okay, though. I don’t have to do this. I don’t have to play Bingo. I don’t have to take walks. I can just accept my so-called “calling” in life and spend half of it in bed. Why not? Most people dream of this, right?

Anyway, I was amazed I wasn’t nauseous on top of all the acid reflux kicking up in my throat last night but my stomach isn’t perfect either.

I’m just so damn drained not just because of the virus itself and the screwy sleep but the lack of nutrition. Even so, I already went back up a pound. I likely never lost fat but weight because my digestive tract emptied out. I tell you, I ain’t kidding when I say you could literally lock me in a room and starve me and I wouldn’t lose a damn pound. I really think some of us are simply the way we’re meant to be.

So I slept a little over 6 hours, began this entry, and then napped for a couple of hours. A little while ago, I was finally able to get up and get down a banana, some apple sauce, and saltines. Tom ran out to Publix and picked up some more chicken soup as well as fruits, veggies, and TV dinners. The only reason I got the processed sodium-laden things was because I don’t have the energy to cook. Hell, I can’t even clean the house.

We’ve gotta drop Walgreens and start getting our meds somewhere else because I am sick and fucking tired of them taking it upon themselves to make my medical decisions for me by refilling prescriptions I didn’t ask them to refill. Tom checked the site again, and we do have the auto-refill off. Yet they refused to honor our request to wait until we tell them to refill meds. I’m not ready for a levo refill for another couple of weeks and the decision as to when I have it refilled should be up to me.

Loving scented things as I do I got some eucalyptus oil going in the diffuser, but it’s not very strong-smelling. Maybe I didn’t put enough in and I’ll add some sandalwood to it. I burned some lavender incense earlier, but I only want to burn one stick a day. If I burn more I get congested.

Some activity going on at the honker’s but what else is new? Next month it’s out of here for a while. He has out-of-town visitors, but he must have picked them up at the airport because they used his truck while he went out on the motorcycle. Why have visitors if you’re not going to do things together? It’s his 60th birthday today, so maybe that’s got something to do with it. I didn’t wish him a happy birthday. He didn’t wish me one for mine in December.

I’m frustrated not only for obvious reasons when one gets sick, but I lost a little money since I haven’t been able to work online as much. Also, I would have finished the challenge and returned to Indiana had I not gotten sick. I did manage to do a few miles yesterday, and it was funny because I was toying with someone else on the road who joined the ride while I was on it. I don’t know if they realized what I was doing or if they cared, but whenever I would pause to change the radio station or skip songs, they would get ahead. But knowing I could go a little faster with my unique setup, I would eventually pass them. Then pause, let them pass, and back and forth. And I’m sure they were wondering how I was managing to pull that off because they weren’t stopping and they were pedaling steadily.

So I’ve gone from drowning to looming jail sentences to being attacked in my dreams. Two or three of the Mexican freeloader’s daughters from Phoenix walked by me eating by myself in a restaurant. Now all grown up, they magically knew who I was even if some were infants in the 90s and others may not have even existed.

They hurled threats and slaps at me and when I went to cover my face with my hands, they started slapping my stomach which was bare as I was wearing a crop top. After a minute of this, they took off and I automatically reached for my phone to call the cops, but then I hesitated. I knew they would not only be long gone, but I didn’t know their names or what the cops could do or that they would even care to do anything, knowing that minorities tend to be believed over non-minorities (the girls looked white, though).

I left the restaurant and resumed my walk home when next thing I knew, I was in Springfield. I recognized the voice of Laurie the cop talking to a couple of people. I only saw her from behind, though. Her butt and back were fat, I noticed, and then I went inside a building to get a drink. I became worried when I heard her voice as she too, entered the building a minute after I did, and I told myself I had to hurry up because if she saw me and recognized me, she certainly could and likely would hurt me.

[bandofchimeras]

anyone else up considering the extent to which being multiply infected with COVID against your will has diminished not only ability to care for self but also will, bc of how many complications there are to your ore existing health conditions it's like a hydra where cutting off a head grows three more?

like fungal infections, heart stuff, joints, kidney, brain, wow there are so many fronts on which my body feels fucking NERFED and I am doing good if I eat one meal a day and drink a few cups of water and shower.

hygiene, dental work, cleaning, fashion, self love, skincare beating addictions, exercising or fitness goals, cooking more, skills and hobbies, much less gender affirming surgery, it's all just gone out the window. I felt defeated by COVID. And how little anyone cared. staying alive, bare minimum, paying bills. It's like depression but not as emotional - existential fatigue. You have to start settling for bare minimum.

But with community, meeting people who do, it's waking back up the impulse to value and love and respect myself. That foundation of love is hard to tap into again. It's not just that traumatic experiences or loss of ability interrupt your life, they can really flatten you out too. Knock you in the dirt enough times and like, you could get up and clean yourself again but what's the point? It's easier to go around already dirty. You're outta energy. You gotta find food, or a dollar.

And that's where the system breaks us. Not the big emotional rending but the dulling, the wear and tear on your spirit til you have no fucks left to give or energy to express your unique energy. Til you start dragging everyone around you down with you into the dirt because who deserves to be clean???

That's the real injury, amid all the injuries of the body. And we must fight it tooth and nail.

I can't do all I used to do for myself and others but I can dig into our essential dignity. I can start to try again.

[kinetic-elaboration]

August 10: Rain, Worries

As always, I feel like the end of this week is really chewing me up and spitting me out. It's disappointing and frustrating that I haven't done any writing since Monday and I'm getting a little worried, not so much about having enough writing time coming up, but about having enough time to write AND do other things and I'm feeling a little overwhelmed with other things.

I got caught in a rainstorm after work (literally, ugh--the forecast said 'scattered thunderstorms' which usually means nothing... I left early to walk out to the Wawa and get some stuff--ended up outside in the 15 or so worst minutes of the storm, rain coming in under my umbrella, through my umbrella, just totally soaked from the waist down, and I didn't want to deal with Wawa in that but I had this extra time which just meant waiting longer in the rain) and that sort of took any ambition out of me. I barely remember getting home. I'd had an early lunch so I was super hungry, so I had a snack and watched some TV. Then I thought I'd 'rest my eyes' for a little, and fell asleep for a couple of hours I think.

When I woke up I was just concerned about eating something but I've been so terrible at anything related to my kitchen this week... cooking, washing dishes, cleaning. It's just a mess. I don't really have a lot left that's, like, simple to make. So I kind of had to scrounge up a put together dinner. I was also really thirsty and really desirous of like... smooth, cool things. I'm still not really sure I ate the right amount or the right stuff.

Also my nose is a little sniffly, which worries me. I just feel blah. But it's probably just a Thursday thing.

I made a list of stuff to do at work tomorrow before I left for the day and I'm hoping it's the right number of tasks to get me through the day without too much trouble. I have to, have to, HAVE TO spend some time cleaning the kitchen in the evening, at least doing dishes. But I also hope to do some writing and then go to sleep early. I have a pretty good sense of this next scene, since I've been rolling it around in my head all week. I'd like to just... have enough energy to just get it down. And if I do that tomorrow it'll make my goal (the section finished by the end of the weekend) that much more reasonable. Last weekend's writing went well enough that I feel like maybe it IS possible to get this whole monster written by the final deadline and this idea is really driving me even though it's far from a sure thing. But like, I don't write full time lol. And the time that my real job eats up is just the start because not every weekend can be one where I ignore all responsibilities in favor of resting and writing, like last weekend was. I just.... I gotta balance everything and I'm so bad at that.

[quiverwingquack]

We really, really, really could use some help right now. Here are my paypal and venmo as well, if anyone can spare anything. Every single dollar will make a huge difference to us.

Here's some more details on the situation.

There's no running water in this house. I can't cook or wash dishes, I can't wash my hands after I go to the bathroom or take a shower after a long shift at work. Hell, just to brush my teeth, I’ve gotta pour one cup of water to rinse with, one cup to wash off my brush, and a third cup if I want to do mouthwash. And we're both disabled, so it's taking a lot of energy we don't have just to survive.

It takes energy to haul the laundry to a laundromat, and money each time just to get clean clothes for work. Energy to find meals to cook that don't need produce washed, and don't need a stove or oven or dishes that we can't wash. Energy to try and bathe, though baby wipes and hand sanitizer can only do so much. The house is always a mess and I feel gross literally 24/7.

Even if we could fix the water, there's a leak in the water heater, so it wouldn't be hot. And because of that leak we had to have the gas cut to the entire house, so the stove and oven are busted too. Even the flooring is falling apart! They fell thru it in the hallway and busted up their foot a couple weeks ago, and now there’s a spot in my room where it collapsed under the carpet. All we could do is cover the holes and try to keep warm every time it snows.

And then on top of it all there's the eviction court date this week. We've been trying to sell this place and move out for months, but the landlord keeps tacking on monthly premium fees, late fees, court filing fees. All that she wants paid before she will approve the sale so we can finally get out. I've spent up any savings I once had trying to keep up. I can barely get enough hours at work to keep the lights and wifi on. All this fighting to keep my shit together and I might not even have any shit to keep when it’s all over.

The few family members I have left can't help, and none of my friends have anything to spare either. And like… I’ve talked with my social worker, and applied to every low income housing/assistance program for my area, but most places around here are low on resources. I'm on at least a dozen waitlists for aid, but nothing has come through in over a year. I’ve applied to every job I could physically work, every place that's hiring in our area, but I haven't gotten a single call for an interview. I don't know of anything else I can do.

If anyone can spare even a little bit, it would help. Every single reblog on this post helps too.

Getting evicted on the 26th unless we can raise $2,860.

I don’t really have the energy to pull together a massive gofundme campaign. I’ve been trying but it’s taking all my focus these days just to keep from having a third or fourth breakdown of the day.

The laundry list of problems has only gotten longer over the few short years we’ve lived here. We’ve now both fallen through the rotting floors. We lost running water last December, slowed to a trickle and finally stopped throughout January. The outlets are constantly sparking. Multiple of our usb bricks have combusted internally or taken heat damage. We’re afraid to plug in or unplug things. These things are only a few of a much longer list.

We want out and have wanted us out but the landlord is dragging us thru the dirt finding more and more and more things we need to pay for before we can sell. We’re trapped, and now we’re facing financial ruin for a house we didn’t want to stay in to begin with. We have no one left to ask for help.

We will be homeless this coming Tuesday without assistance. Between us we could only scrounge up $550.

my paypal | my venmo

I don't even know what to tag this as... everything I can think of has been filtered out of searches and tags afaik. But this is kind of our last ditch effort.

We have two days. So if you see this post, please boost it.

[curlynerd]

Dean Winchester hates mornings.

It might have something to do with the four hours of sleep that precede them. Or perhaps the lingering memories of dragging a grumpy, petulant 12-year-old Sam out of bed for school when he was still an equally grumpy, petulant kid himself. Or maybe he just isn't wired to handle the early hours.

Whatever it is, Dean Winchester hates mornings.

And yet, he still wakes up early every day.

Drags his ass out of bed with a grumble and a sigh. Keeps his curses as quiet as possible so he doesn't wake Cas beside him. Scrubs at the sleep making his eyes gritty. Shuffles into a pair of pajama bottoms and his slippers with a disgruntled huff, like having to deal with the early morning chill is one of life's greatest inconveniences.

At the doorway, Dean pauses and looks back. Cas is still blissfully unconscious, his breathing slow and heavy and relaxed. The second Dean got out of bed he snagged all the blankets and cocooned himself in them, but by now his hand is out, searching for Dean so he can wrap his arm around him again. When it fails to find him, it curls around Dean's pillow. Cas buries his nose in it and lets out a tiny coo of contentment.

Dean smiles, his heart so full it aches. For just a second, he considers crawling back into bed with Cas. Succumbing to his hatred of mornings and going back to sleep with Cas nuzzled up against him like Dean is his personal teddy bear.

But he doesn't. He shuts the door behind him as quietly as possible and shambles down the hallway.

Dean's not quite firing on all cylinders without coffee in his system, so he bangs his shoulder on the doorway as he rounds the corner into the kitchen, and he swears a blue streak on his way to the sink. He's still grumbling under his breath as he grabs the lid of Sam's shaker bottle from the side of the sink and washes it with as much malcontent as he can muster. Sam always forgets to wash it when he rinses out his bottle, and Dean always has to clean it the next morning so Sam doesn't get yesterday's nasty protein shake crap mixed in with today's. He sets it beside the clean bottle and makes himself some coffee.

It's not long after the smell of fresh coffee fills the kitchen when Sam walks in, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and wearing running clothes like the health freak he is. "Hey."

Dean grunts in acknowledgement. Words are for after coffee. Sam starts making himself a protein shake without so much as a 'thank you' for cleaning his lid. Hell, he's probably not even aware Dean does it for him.

"Oh, can you do extra spinach in my omelette? Gotta use it up; it's getting kinda wilted," Sam asks on his way out the door, like it's a given Dean will make him an omelette. Because it is a given. Five people in the bunker and someone needs to make breakfast for them all. Might as well be Dean. "And tomatoes?"

"Yeah yeah, have it your way, Burger King," Dean grouses as he pours himself a mug of coffee. He dumps what's left and fills the carafe with more water.

"Awesome, thanks." And then Sam's gone off to do horrifying morning activities like jogging.

Dean, however, is doing something even more horrifying. He fills the coffee maker with pumpkin spice flavored coffee and grimaces. But God help him, Cas loves the stuff. And Dean loves Cas, so he'll make him some freakin' pumpkin spice coffee. Though this is the only point in the entire day when he questions his love for Cas. Just a little bit.

As nutmeg and cinnamon fill the air, Dean chugs his respectable cup of plain ol' dark roast and browses the contents of the refrigerator.

Blueberries. He should use those up too. Dean plucks them, some eggs, some butter, some milk, and all of the stuff for Sam’s atrocious vegetable omelette from the fridge.

Jack comes shuffling in while Dean is mixing up blueberry pancake batter, looking sleepy but chipper. He looks even happier when he sees what Dean’s cooking. “Excellent timing! Chop Sam’s tomatoes for me,” Dean commands before Jack even has a chance to say a ‘good morning!’ or grab some juice. The coffee is finally kicking in and dragging him into full wakefulness, but the patient parts of Dean’s brain don’t come online until at least 9am.

Eileen isn’t far behind Jack, but she takes one look at Dean with his spatula and Jack at the cutting board and immediately backs out of the kitchen. “Sorry! Dunno what you’re saying!” she shouts as she retreats, as if she expected Dean to try calling out orders after her. “I’m gonna shower!” Dean sighs and shakes his head. Probably for the best. She handles produce and a chef's knife the same way she does with vampires and a machete.

“Hello, Dean. Jack.” Cas drags himself into the kitchen with half-open eyes. His sleep-rough voice is adorable. The wild shock of hair standing up on one side, even moreso.

“Mornin’ Sunshine!” Dean croons at full volume, like he does every morning, because he’s kind of an asshole and secretly likes the way Cas scowls at Dean’s energy as he makes a cup of his terrible pumpkin spice coffee.

Cas comes up behind Dean and rests his chin over his shoulder to watch him cook, like he’s too tired to even bother holding up his own head. Dean has to be careful how he moves his arm so he doesn’t burn himself on Cas’ hot mug, but he’d be lying if he said this wasn’t one of his favorite parts of the day. Cas tucked up against his back, sleep hazy and warm from their shared bed, those beautiful blues blinking owlishly as Dean makes food for their family.

“Sure you don’t want any?” he asks, pointing down at the griddle even though he knows the answer already.

“No, too early to eat,” Cas grunts by his ear. “Coffee is enough. It smells delicious though.” He tilts his head down to press a gentle kiss to Dean’s shoulder before he pulls away to slouch down in a chair and finish waking up.

By the time Dean finishes breakfast, Sam and Eileen have filtered in too, completing their packed table. For a brief moment it’s utter chaos as everyone grabs plates of food and cutlery and coffee and juice, but before Dean can blink everyone is settled, chowing down on their breakfast or quietly drinking their awful flavored coffee. Dean lets out a weary sigh and sinks down into a chair next to Cas with his own stack of pancakes. It’s way too early to feel this tired.

Almost immediately Cas tilts sideways until he’s using Dean as a headrest again. "I don't see how you can stand getting up so early," Cas says around a slow sip of his coffee. He closes his eyes in appreciation and hums softly.

Dean glances around the table. At Sam, his overly long hair plastered to his sweaty forehead, scrolling through his phone as he shovels egg white omelette into his mouth like he's starving for it. At Eileen, a pleased grin on her face as her closed fist moves in a circle in front of her, her thumb pointed down over her stack of pancakes. At Jack, watching her intently as she teaches him a new sign, his fork suspended halfway to his mouth until a bite of pancake falls off it and smacks onto the table, making Eileen laugh.

At his family, fed and caffeinated and content, ready to start their days because Dean took the extra time to get things off on the right foot.

"I dunno," Dean says with a shrug as he passes Jack the bottle of syrup. He grins. "I kinda like mornings."