#i have been radiating and vibrating with a desire to talk about them im sure its obvious so ty for indulging me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lyssaloveesmagick · 3 years ago

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LET'S TALK CRYSTALS!

~ Everything has energy, and if you believe in Tarot cards I believe you should also believe in the energy crystals radiate, as they are more natural than any form of divination. ☺️

~ Each Crystal is different, different colors and shapes each have specific uses but many have multiple uses. Lots of crystals are used in Chakra work, Dream work and other forms of energy/ascension/alignment work. The closer to natural the stone is, the more potent it will be. Polished stones still work well, just often at a slower pace. Bigger crystals will be stronger too.

~ When working with crystals in Chakra work most of the time the color of the stone will align with the corresponding chakra.

For example:

♥️ ROOT - Garnet, Carnelian, Red Jasper, Bloodstone. (I love using obsidian here too but I want to discuss this stone lower in the post)

🧡 SACRAL PLEXUS - Sunstone, Orange Calcite, Tigers Eye & Citrine

💛 SOLAR PLEXUS - Pyrite, Aragonite, Amber & Yellow Tourmaline

💚 HEART - Emerald, Malachite, Amazonite & Green Aventurine (& Rose Quartz)

💙 THROAT - Apatite, Soladite, Turquoise & Blue Kyanite ... Think light blue/teal here.

🧿 3rd EYE - Laborodite (my favorite crystal), Azurite, Lapis Lazuli & Sapphire

💜 CROWN - Amethyst, Moonstone, Lepidolite & Howlite

Now, the colors dont HAVE to match. There are plenty of chakra healers/balancers that dont coordinate colors BUT I love to match so there's my list!

🤍 Obsidian (mentioned above) is great for protection!

🤍 Selanite is great for clearing energy & charging other crystals. You can get it as a plate or bowl to rest your daily crystals on so they're ready to go in the morning.

🤍 Clear Quartz is an everything stone! You can literally charge it with any intention. Its a good stand in for anything you dont have. With Quartz being a high vibrational stone it will work to align you with its vibration, often sending you ideas to help you take inspired action to illuminate and clear your path. My favorite of the Quartz family is Lumerian, but stones such as Citrine, Amethyst, Smoky Quartz & Rose Quartz are all in the same family. Be knowledgeable when buying Citrine & Amethyst as some are man made by heat treatment.

🤍 MOLDAVITE is a popular one lately so let's talk about it. Moldavite is a tektite, which is technically not a crystal but still acts like one. It was created in a single meteorite impact in Bohemia that occurred about 15 million years ago. It is ONLY found in the Czech Republic which causes it to be extremely rare & now often faked due to it's increasing demand. So beware of its very high price & be alert when buying. Because of its birth story it's energy is at times chaotic, which you can also see within the stone when examining it, as the inner lines have no pattern & it also holds tiny air bubbles. Like Clear Quartz, its a high vibrational "stone" that works to align you with its vibration. So if you are interacting with low vibrational people or activities it will work to remove these from your life usually by aligning your thought patterns with the correct actions. It may bring you some magic but more often than not you will be asked to take inspired action to have it work properly. This is one piece I cannot sleep with in my room at all!!

~ Check that your crystal dealer is selling ethically sourced stones & be sure to do your research on which crystal/tektite will work best for your desired intentions before purchasing & activating them! I find it best to only work with 1-4 crystals at a time when outside of my home. 2 is my sweet spot, but we are all different & our sensitivity changes as we develop empathy towards universal energy.

~ Ok! Now that we've got the basics on picking your crystal out of the way, here's how to use them!!

~ You should cleanse your crystal after purchasing it to remove the energy of anyone who has handled them or any negative experiences they've endured before reaching you. Not all practicioners believe this & not all stones hold negativity but I believe it's good practice & can't hurt so here's what I know: You can do this in many ways. Sound cleansing (via bells or soundbowls or even YouTube sound baths), kosher or Himalayan salt bath, brown rice, smoke cleanse (via ethically sourced Sage, Palo Santo or Incense) or for certain stones you can soak them in running water or salt/sun/moonwater to cleanse & charge - BUT use caution as some, such as moldavite, laborodite & selenite (most crystals ending in ite) will dissolve in water, especially hot water so again, do your research on the specifics - you can burry them in dirt outside or in your house plants for a few hours just watch out for rain/damp soil, a Selanite or Quartz dish will cleanse & charge any stone, & my personal favorite method - setting them out under the moonlight! I think the Sun works too but the Moon is preferred by most practitioners. It usually only takes a couple hours with most of these methods. Smaller crystals can be cleansed with breath & feather wind.

~ To charge them, moonlight is ideal. Setting them in a windowsill or outside for 3-5 hours will work perfectly! You can soak them in saltwater under the sun too. This amplifies their natural energy before adding your own.

~ To program & active each crystal you'll essentially be forming a bond with each one individually. You can do this simply by holding it in your dominant hand (usually the right hand as the left body is for recieving intuitive nudges), meditate with the crystal wrapped in both hands, envisioning what you'd like to accomplish together & commanding it to activate. I personally find that the universe works best when we say please & thank you. I also like to kiss my energy into each stone after we've spent a few moments bonding.

~ Now your crystals are ready to move energy & help you develop your growth! All you have to do is place them accordingly in your home or carry them on you. Again, I find it best to only carry about 2 on me at a time. I have also found that sleeping with too many in my room gives me restless sleep, even just 1 high vibrational stone on my dresser is usually too much for me, but the lower chakra stones or blue stones are usually okay. Some people keep them on an altar or in a grid (YouTube is very helpful for learning gridwork) some keep them in windowsills - just use caution as some stones get sunbleached - & some people like me have a few crystals in each room! You can look into the best placements for each stone you own for best uses & placements depending on your intentions.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

I get the most potent dreams with Red Garnet under my pillow & Blue Kyanite on my side table. I keep a large Rose Quartz, medium Amethys & Selanite, & some smaller Obsidian, Moonstone, Laborodite, Rainbow Hematite & Quartz pieces & Gold flakes on my dresser... Although as I'm typing this im wondering if that Laborodite is why I haven't been sleeping as well or if it's just all the Eclipse & Retrograde Energy going around in this 2021 air 😆

Either way, I hope you've found this post to be of some use & if you have any questions or anything I can add please don't hesitate to reach out!!! (Use of Evil Eye as 3rd Eye symbol in this post is soley meant for aesthetic but I do wish protection, peace & prosperity on all it lay sight on)

HAPPY HEALING!! 🤍

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ch4nb4ng · 4 years ago

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[4:57]

ceo!chan

warnings: porn, office sex, penetration, squirting, roughish (?) play, depredation and humiation (very little)

you walked in and sat on the chair in front him. a frustrated sigh escaped your lips as you slouched down, indifferent about the unprofessionalism in front of your boss.

“do i need to remind you that this is a workplace, and not your apartment where you can huff and puff and do what you want?”

his tone was stern, but his face said otherwise. he was one to talk; he was in fact slouched in his ‘very special’ office chair as well, barely concentrating on what he was meant to be doing: his job. you remained unchanged, completely unbothered. anything harsh that came from his mouth at this moment was like flicking a fly off your shoulder; annoying, but nothing too serious.

“mr. bang im so stressed,” you sighed, waiting for him to look away from his desktop and become fixated on you, the look of concern: the heavy lean, head cocked back slightly, palm of his hand resting underneath his chin, index and middle fingers rating on his chin, thumb on his jaw, the others pushing onto his lips. and finally, the furrowed eyebrow of concern. He was a strict boss. always busy doing work and being productive. no time for mucking around or incompetence was tolerated. however, he was fair. fair work load, adequate amount of time given for tasks to be completed, break times, and he didn’t mind listening to his employees when they were stressed with problems outside of work (but if they were about work, his ears became shut).

“mr. bang?” your lips formed into a pout as he ignored you, eyes still fixated on his screen. you lifted a hand, waving it infront of his face. nothing. you could feel the seed of frustration become implanted in the pit of your stomach. nothing could be done about it; it had to be left alone. he was your boss, the ceo; it’s not like you could actually become angry at him. on the contrary he was being very rude.

“mr. bang,” you sighed, “what’s on your computer?”

more silence in response. what on earth was his problem? he was quick to criticise you, highlighting your informal entry into his office, yet he couldn’t give you the time of day? the seed of anger began to grow, his ignorance to you like water is to a plant; the main ingredient for development. it was growing, faster and faster as his head tilted to a slight angle, as if he already didn’t have a good enough angle of whatever he was looking at.

“nevermind,” you huffed, stomping out of his seat and turning on your heels. You were ready to make your exit, way too fed up to have a proper, logical conversation with him. as you began your first step, you froze, ears perking up at the pornographic moans that bled through the surround sound speaker system. you refused to turn around, saving the embarrassment your boss felt in front of his assistance. all you were able to hear was what you assumed to be the knee-shattering thud coming from his desk. warmth creeping onto your cheeks, things were becoming too real. his fingers were moving fast, trying anything and everything to shut the computer down.

“fuck,” he mumbled, what he thought was under his breath, but in reality was easily audible to the ear, he puffed, knocking over a collection of folders as he dragged the mouse across the screen.

‘just keep walking’ you thought to yourself; it would be so much easier if you had just walked out and pretended that none of this had happened. it was embarrassing, you were embarrassed for him; anyone would be. all you had to do was leave. escape and prevent him from any further humiliation.

but it was impossible now. you could hear the female’s voice.

“fuck,” she whined, “i must be such a good assistant for my boss to fuck me this go-.”

and finally, he had managed to turn the sound off. your body betrayed you, panic replacing the seed of anger as you scurried to his desk, helping him gather the sheets he had loosely scattered around him. the adrenalin was slowly wearing off as you helped him. you refuse to let your eyes sit on him at all. this was, well, weird; but not like you hadn’t thought of it before. a face panic was hijacking his features, but the way his blazer was half way down his shoulders, heavy on the floor with his legs widely spread, was sending your mind into a head spin. you paused, unsure of what to do or how to proceed, mind falling into a confliction. Any person would pick up the papers, put them on his desk and run out of there, but the whole thing sparked a type of thrill in your chest. you shook your head, standing up and placing the remainder of loose paper on his desk. The eye contact was brief. the redness previously playing on his ears had dissipated. you span around once more, hoping to successfully leave his office this time.

“wait,” he gasped, extending a hand, letting the roughness of his fingertips wrap around your innocent wrist. you said nothing, letting yourself feel mr. bang’s chest against your back, adding the necessary heat and drive to your body that you had oh so desired. your head thrown back, you let it ply out. let your boss snake his fingers around once more, gripping your wrist, slithering around your body, a palm effortlessly spreading across your neck. a soft groan escaped your lips, eyelids falling as you gave yourself into his touch, letting your own fingertips rest on his hardened thigh. Index finger perched underneath your chin, you smiled; the harsh feeling of him cocking your head to the left contrasting with the complimentary graze against your lobe as he tucked the oh so delicate strands behind your ear.

There was a long pause, causing your hips to jolt at the feeling of his lips attaching to the base of your neck. the deep chuckle that followed was a god send, delivering vibrations down and around your body like a rollercoaster.

“mr. b-bang i-“

“shhhh,” he whispered, the sensation of his warm breath instantly melting into your skin, “let’s just talk for a minute.”

a slight nod came from your head. he broke away, plopping right back into his ‘magnificent’ boss-like chair. all you could do was stare as his legs spread wide open, blazer jacket completely off, a few buttons barely hanging on as he looked you up and down. it made you feel small, humiliated, a joke to him.

but you loved it.

“so,” he began, crossing his left leg over, “why did you come in here for?”

“well,” you paused, cussing yourself at the way your voice uncontrollably whined for him, “i just needed someone to talk to because i have been really stressed for the past week.”

a playful smirk ripped onto his lips as he rolled his chair closer to you, placing his hands on either side of you thighs. chin resting on your stomach, you whined. he was being so damn cute right now.

“and why is it that your stressed?” he asked reaching for the remote control on his desk. he pressed the top button, activation of electronic technology filling the room as the dark blinds came out, nothing but the red light mr. bang kept on his desk illuminating the two of you. bodies so close together, glistening in the red shadow. the darkness of what should have been an illuminating direction really revealed the true intentions of what he was thinking. eyes black, teeth grinding, jaw clenched. you were surprised no horns or tail had appeared.

“j-just you know, um, well,”

“spit it out princess,” he hissed, lifting your blouse and pressing a gentle kiss to your skin.

“you’ve given me a lot of deadlines this week and i-“

“aw baby,” he cooed, tangling his digits around wrist once more, leaning back as he dragged you onto his deliciously spreaded lap, “you know i hate when people complain about work.”

you pouted, lazily playing with the exposed skin on his chest,

“i know but mr. bang, i had no one else to talk to about it.”

“wow, my little princess must be stressed out huh,” he queried, “we have to do something about that don’t we?”

you looked up into his gaze, the fiery hunger still evident from before. his legit arm became hooked around your left leg, right hand lifting your skirt, revealing your black lace panties, clearly oozing with arousal. he chuckled.

“is this what you’re always like when you're around me miss. y/l/n?”

too embarrassed to answer you covered your face, feeling the heat of humiliation radiating off your cheeks and he hooked his fingers underneath your undergarment, hasil pulling them down to expose your longing core. The sound of delight that left your boss’ throat was mind boggling. A deep groan, followed by a chuckle of pure satisfaction at your were dripping. He stuck out two fingers right underneath your cunt, smirking at the greedy glistening your juices gently coaching his fingers.

“fuck,” you mumbled, hands still over your face. this was so embarrassing. the way he controlled you. the way you had already submitted to him; he’d barely touch you thus far. His fingers were soft, almost too soft as traced your folds, the desire for direct friction becoming urgent.

“mhm,” you hummed, making sure any sound that left your lips was quiet.

“come on y/n,” he purred, making your legs feel light, “tell me what you want.”

you finally took your hands away, looking down to see mr.bang, you boss, aka, ceo of the company, looking up at you, biting down on the bottom left corner. He was very satisfied with the discombobulated state he had put you in. your posture was weak, back achingly hunched over, hands threatening to grab his wrist and shove them in between your folds, into your entrance, on your body. Anywhere except for on your folds would have been acceptable at this point in time. finger pads becoming stronger, your hips involuntary jerked up, a jolt of pleasure shooting from your core as he adjusted himself, accidentally flicking your clit in the process.

“please,” you whined, sinking to be closer to him, elbows propped in his desk for support, “no more t-teasing.”

the begging flipped a switch in me.bang. he growled, standing up and rustling your by the hips, backside faced to him as he pressed up against you. you gasped. you could only feel the outline of his length, however, you moaned, just at the thought of knowing how well he would fill you little hole up.

his fingertips left your hips, beginning to snake around your body, smoothing over any exposed skin he could create and smother. his touch was delicate; you could tell he was holding back.

“you’re so naughty aren’t you missy?” he chuckled, bringing a hand back around from you front to cup your ass, “practically begging for your bosses cock, during working hours?”

you said nothing. arousal coming over and crashing down into your body at his humiliating words. you could feel your skirt being lifted once more, a slight coolness pressing to your ass as it was now bare, completely exposed. he bit down on his lip, eyes fully glued to your backside as he hands descended, playfully curling the circumference of each cheek.

“mmm,” you groaned, unable to get enough of the way his textured hands felt, “mr. bang your hands feel so goo-“

you were quickly interrupted by the sudden digits encompassing your neck. you eyes widened, caught off guard by his sudden movements.

“please baby, you don’t have to call me mr. bang. call me anything but that.”

his tone was aggressive. you could tell he was being serious. you nervously gulped; what you were doing was highly out of the ordinary, and definitely a huge human resource breach. the last thing you wanted to do was piss him off. his thumb now pressed on your face, you smiled, opening your mouth to invite his shining fingers into your mouth. he moaned, head thrown back as you effortlessly covered his thumb in juicy spit. he quickly brought it back down to your heat, finally sliding it through your folds, barely pressing on your clit. your body lunged forward, but he stopped you. he placed his hands on your back, pushing your body against his desk, face squashed to the side and he got back into his knees. his spread your cheeks, spitting directly into your aching holes. his jaw clenched, enjoying the pathetic whines and mumbles came to your lips as he spread toru wetness around. god it had been so long. if he kept this up, you’d be cumming all over his face in no time.

“tell me baby, what do you want?”

“mmmm, mr.bang- uh i mean, chan, wait, can i call you that?”

“i told you princess,” he purred, wrapping his fingers around your wrist, motioning it towards his tent, “you can call me whatever you want.”

a stifled moan escaped your lips. the outline of his cock was exquisite. it was making your mouth salivate. oh the things you would do to have him in your mouth was eating you up inside.

“can i suck on your cock?”

your answer knocked the wind right out of him. he wasn’t expecting something so straight forward. you tend to beat around the bush when you needed something.

“okay baby, and why do you want to do that?”

he was standing again. pressing his clothed cock right into your bare ass, making your head feel very dizzy. his nose tickling your ear lobe, and lips on the crook of your jaw made you suck in a large breath.

“your cock feels so nice when i touch it,” you paused, turning to face him, “i wanna know what it taste like too.”

the way he grit down on his teeth, making his jaw completely tense up was so fucking hot. the way he became flustered at your response. he woudl love nothing more but to hold your hair up and fuck the shit out of your throat.

“god you’re making me so tempted,” he growled, forming a tight grip on your ass, “but we can do that another time. i just wanna fuck you so bad right now.”

the vulgarity of his voice left in you in a moaning mess. he was so dirty, filthy, the heat oozing out of his pores and onto you, making you feel like you were his destiny. the little fuck toy that you had been fantasizing about.

“mhm,” you whined, desperation evident in your tone, “please fuck me sir, i want to be filled up with your cock.”

“fuckin hell,” he grunted, taking a step back to undo his belt, almsot ripping off his pants in the process, “you’re so fucking dirty you know that?”

“please,” you huffed, “i’m not the one that watched ceo assistant porn in the middle of the day.”

you wanted to look at his face, hoping your words evoked an anger in him that he could easily take out on you.

“you’re such a smart ass huh? lay flat down on the table for me.”

you did as you were told, happily squishing your face against his desk and he began to stroke himself. the devilish moan escaping his lips made everything stop for a moment. were you really doing this right now, with your boss? reality quickly began to settle in. maybe this wasn’t such a good idea-

“oh fuck,” you yelled, quickly covering your mouth as he slammed his cock into you, filling you up to the brim. your eyes were already at the back of your head. yeah, you expected him to fill you up adequately, but your expectations were too way too low; it felt 1,000,000 times better than any image you ever had.

“that shut you up didn’t it,” he smirked, bringing his left hand to your right side, “you’re so fucking tight it’s fucking ridiculous.”

the continuum of cussing that came out of his mouth after every second word was like music to his ears. the professional boss you once knew was thrown out the window. nothing but a horny fucking boss who can’t get anything because he works too hard.

“does it feel good,” he groaned, giving a blow to your ass in the process, “tell me how good my cock feels buried inside you pretty little pussy.”

incase he couldn’t tell from the way your knuckles had become ghost white from the right grip you had on the edge of his desk, you opened your mouth, only able to respond in muffled whimpers and distorted sounds as he rammed his cock in and out of your wanting hole. his chuckle became even deeper, mr.bang falling into another universe as his cock stretched out your walls. his jaw now loose, he hung onto your hair, grouping it into an extremely messy ponytail as he yanked your head back, tears beading at the corner of your eyes. all previous partners were soft, nothing but praise and kindness. you did love that, but feeling like a toy; that was a whole new level of pleasure.

“fuck fuck fuck,” you whined, feeling yourself already begin to clench around him, “pull my hair harder, harder please sir.”

“how can i say no when you ask me so nicely?”

his smirk was now visible to you. your head was all the way back, looking at your boss upside down as he focused on your pussy, finding different ways to push and shove his cock into you harder and faster. you could feel him twitch, especially each time you clenched around him.

“fuck don’t do that y/n,” he growled, now creating a palm or read across your left ass cheek from another slap, “if you keep doing that i’ll fucking cum.”

the giggle that left your throat was sadistic. a mixture of bliss and torture, like you were frothing at the mouth. things were getting really hot now, it would be moments before you burst out in loud cries, shaking from the life changing orgasm you were about to have.

mr.bang paused, changing the angle of his thrusts to hit a different spot. your knees gave way as soon as his position changed.

“bingo,” he smirked, picking up his pace to be even faster from before. he held onto you, hands leaving your hair and wrapped around your arms. it was too much. you were completely under his control. he had gotten you to be right where you needed him. each time he hit your sweet spot was each time your knees buckled; you really didn’t know how much longer you could take.

“mmmmm,” was all you could whine, “c-cum.”

“you’re gonna cum?”

a feeling of relief spread to your chest at the feeling of his thrusts becoming a lot less rhythmic. mr.bang’s forehead was now pressed agaisnt your back, the ice like feeling of the beads of sweat spread across his forehead called you down.

“yes p-please,” you cried, “please make me cum!”

the next second was a blur. all you could feel was the immense pleasure burst from your core, ripping to your stomach and every single other possible part of your body that could feel anything. the crash was hard, legs shaking as he brought 2 fingers down to your clit. he pulled out, storming your back in his liquid before returning to your clit , enjoying the way you struggled underneath him.

“wait y/n!”

he quickly stopped, causing you to fall to you knees, chest heavily moving, panting audibly evident. you opened your eyes. quickly covering your mouth and the mess you had made.

“mr. bang i’m so sorry i’ll get the cleaner to-“

“shh,” he hissed, interrupting your nervous ramble, “let me help you you up first.”

he held out his hands, gently bringing you from the ground. he turned around, giving you time to grab you panties and put them back on. he said nothing, following your direction and rebutting his shirt, looking at the reflection is his computer screen to adjust his tie.

“i’m so sorry-“

“hey, it’s fine, can’t help it if i make you feel so good that you have to squirt everywhere.”

“oh my god,” you mumbled, pacing out of there. you grabbed the handle, about to turn when you heard him call for you.

“wait, y/n!”

he walked up to you, his large figure towering over you as he spoke,

“i hope you’re feeling less stressed now. why don’t you come to my office early tomorrow morning, keep the promise you made about wanting to taste me?”

#okay im tired i sleep now #chan smut #bang chan smut #bang chan #chris bang #chris bang smut #stray kids smut #stray mids fic #kpop #kpop smut #bang chan x reader #chan x reader

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marvelmando · 5 years ago

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tempest [p.parker x o.c.] - eight

notes: ((posting my favorite chapter in honor of spider-man returning to the mcu!!!))

this chapter has been in my head for... like, years. i literally created tempest around the scene with marin and peter, and im so proud that i’ve managed to write almost all of it. this is probably one of my favorite chapters, just because i’ve had it in mind for so long, and you finally get a glimpse into how marin’s powers were exposed.

that being said, this chapter has a very in-depth discussion of a murder-suicide, and domestic abuse, so please please don’t read the following scenes if you’re easily grossed out or triggered.

“but it’s the bad parts i remember the most... and it became her undoing.”

“as my mother tried to soothe him... it took a moment to compose herself.”

if you need a general summary of marin’s background, please read the end notes of the chapter!

****contains: mentions of a murder-suicide, descriptions of domestic abuse, mental illness

pairing: peter parker + fem! o.c.

word count: 5k

previous chapter next chapter tempest masterlist

MARIN DIDN'T SLEEP THAT NIGHT. Between the memories that haunted her, and thoughts of a certain boy that kept her mind spinning, Marin couldn't shut her eyes for more than a couple minutes at a time without either gasping or breaking out in a cold sweat.

She laid in her bed until the sun peeked through her curtains, and well beyond that. She probably should have done something more constructive with her time, like train or read a book or something, but her limbs felt like they were weighted down with bricks. She couldn't muster up the energy to sit up in bed, let alone try using her powers or concentrate on anything other than breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out.

Like she did every year on that day, she mourned her parents silently. But this year was different only because thinking about her parents, meant thinking about Peter. He currently hated her because he thought she had killed them. And thinking about Peter made her heart sink and her head pound.

But then the pounding wasn't coming from her head anymore—it was coming from her bedroom door.

Marin didn't respond, but Lucy didn't care, because she entered her room anyway. "Marin, you've got to get up."

Marin just buried her face into her pillow.

"Marin," Lucy pushed, grabbing Marin's comforter and yanking it off of her. "C'mon, this isn't healthy."

"Don't care," Marin muttered into her pillow.

"Well, I do. So get up, you're gonna go train your new powers."

Marin lifted her head up at that. "You know about that?"

"Yeah, Professor Xavier told James and I. But don't change the subject—Jean and Storm are waiting for you downstairs in the simulation room." Lucy pulled at her arm now, but Marin obliged into a sitting position. She noticed James lingering in the doorway.

"All right, give me time to shower, at least?"

Lucy narrowed her eyes. "Ten minutes, Frost—I don't want any dilly-dallying in there, because I know you would if I let you."

"Fine." Marin rolled her eyes. "Be ready in fifteen."

+++

It was more like twenty, but Lucy should've only been glad that it wasn't at least thirty-five, like her normal showers.

Sure enough, Storm and Jean really were waiting for her, and they'd set the room up with plenty of rubber mats. Marin eyed the otherwise-empty room warily.

Jean chuckled. "This is just to help you practice your control, Marin. No simulations, yet, so there's nothing to be nervous about."

"We're rooting for you, Marin," Lucy gave her a thumbs-up, and backed out of the room with James at her side.

Marin nodded, shaking the nerves buzzing in her hands. Now that she was out of bed and her mind was distracted, it was easy to put her worries to the side. She signaled that she was ready to the two older mutants.

"Okay, Marin. You've done this before, except this time, you're older—you're in control." Storm exposited. "Close your eyes. Picture the energy flowing in you, swimming in your veins, crawling through the layers of your skin. Just observe it for now—simply acknowledge its presence as a part of you."

Marin concentrated. This lesson was similar to the training she'd gone through with her hydrokinetic powers, but this time, she knew that the power was coming from inside her, which made it more difficult to locate and identify. After a moment of silence, Marin huffed. "I don't feel anything."

"That's okay, just focus, Marin." Jean spoke. "It's there, waiting for you to find it. Don't try so hard, let it come to you naturally."

"The energy fluctuates with your emotions—when you become angry, or upset, it reacts accordingly." Said Storm. "But now, you are in control. The purpose of letting it come to you when you are calm is so that you refuse to let the energy control you."

Marin nodded, relaxing her clenched fists, not remembering when she'd done so. She breathed deeply, searching her body from within.

Somewhere under her skin, she felt a nudge. After the nudge, came a push, and then a rush of emotion. I am in control, she reminded herself. Marin stroked the wave of energy rising inside her with her mind, causing it to hum pleasantly in response. The hum began to vibrate, starting at the center of her chest and radiating outward, washing tingles throughout her entire body. She felt the hair on her arms rise, and the weight of her hair resting on her shoulders lift. Her entire body felt like a single, continuous flow of energy.

Marin opened her eyes, finding the room bathed in a warm blue light. Glancing down at herself, she realized that it was her; the bright aquamarine blue light surrounded her, seeping through the pores of her skin—reminding her of pressing a flashlight against her finger, the light passing through her skin. Except for this light, she could feel as it ignited every nerve ending in her body—glowing from every atom within her.

She jerked when she noticed that she was also hovering a couple feet off the ground, her hair floating around her hair like she was underwater. Panicking, she flailed her arms and unintentionally shot a blast of energy into the wall, blowing a sizeable dent into the cement.

Marin fell, losing her balance and landing on her back. Groaning, she picked herself up. "Sorry," she said sheepishly to her mentors, who looked between each other, and Marin assumed Jean was making a comment to Storm with her telepathy powers. "Was that okay?"

Storm looked at her and smiled reassuringly. "It was great, Marin. You handled it well, especially for using it for the first time in years."

"So... do you think I'm dangerous, then?" Marin grimaced.

"Not at all, Marin." Jean smiled, cupping Marin's cheeks in a motherly fashion. "You just need to train, to practice your control, that's all."

"Okay," Marin nodded, stepping back, and bracing herself. "Let's train, then."

+++

It had taken Marin three years to learn how to freeze and boil water instantaneously, and six years to learn how to heal others with water. But by the time the sun had set that day, Marin had managed to control her powers enough to manipulate the energy around her to fly.

Shooting beams of energy was still tricky and not entirely accurate, but at least she was no longer shooting off blasts by accident. She could summon the energy within seconds instead of minutes, and she was getting the hang of releasing her powers without falling down (even if she landed wobbly nearly every time). By bedtime, she was floating around the mansion with relative ease—the stress of the day's memories never passing her mind when she glided throughout the halls.

"Marin, please get down from the ceiling," Charles called up to her from his wheelchair, his neck craning to address the mutant walking upside down on the ceiling.

"All right," Marin sighed, descending and releasing the energy, her skin returning to its normal, freckled beige.

"Please get some rest tonight, okay?"

Marin smiled. "I will, Professor."

And she had planned on keeping her word, she really did try. But the second she crawled into bed, Marin was restless with the onslaught of unwelcome thoughts. She'd managed to go the entire day without dwelling on her parents' deaths or let herself be consumed by worries about Peter. But now, with her body finally still and her mind no longer distracted, she couldn't help but torture herself with the impulsive desire to show off her new powers to her friend.

Marin sighed after a few minutes of restless silence, giving up on sleep. She got up, and tiptoed to Lucy's bedroom, knocking softly on the door. It was still fairly early in the evening, but she hoped that Lucy hadn't planned on getting an early night's sleep.

Sure enough, a voice said from within, "Come in," and Marin stepped through.

"Hey," Marin whispered, even though Lucy and James were both wide awake and sitting on opposite ends of the bed, seemingly in the middle of a card game. "Can I talk to you guys for a bit?"

"Sure, what's up?" Lucy obliged, scooping the cards away to make room for Marin to sit on the bed. "Is it about the new powers?"

"Kinda." Marin exhaled softly. "It's also about... Spider-Man."

"What about him?"

"I miss him." Marin admitted. "Like, way more than I expected. As I steadily gained control over my powers today, all I wanted to do was go and show him." She wrung her hands together. "But then I remembered that he hates me for things that aren't true, and I can't stop thinking about the horrified look in his eyes when Mr. Stark told him that I killed my parents—and how I never got to explain myself, explain why I lied to him about being a mutant, and I just know that I can't live with that kind of guilt."

Lucy and James studied her as she continued her speech. "I've been alone my whole life. Everyone has always hated me or feared me for horrific actions they believed I committed, and I've lived with that isolation for the nine years I've lived here because honestly, I didn't really know anything else. But then I met him, and he showed me a kindness that I'd never experienced before. I was fine with being lonely until the night I ran away when I followed him through his life—I made unexpected friends, fought my first supervillain, and even met an Avenger. It was like I was seeing a glimpse of the life I feel like I was always meant to have. And now... now, I don't know what to do. Because I know I have to keep training to control these new powers, but I can't help but yearn for that other life. I know I should stay here and train, but my life feels like it was left behind in Queens, and my soul is being split in half."

Marin sniffled wetly as she wiped at her damp cheeks. "I need to tell him the truth. But I don't know ho, because he's there, and I'm here."

Neither of them responded, only looking between each other, probably having a conversation in their minds. Eventually, the nodded, and both looked to Marin.

"We've got an idea."

+++

"Forest Hills—are you sure?" Lucy clarified once more.

"Yes, Lucy," Marin confirmed. "Land in Forest Park like last time, I can make my way from there."

"Won't that take a while?" James asked from his co-pilot's seat.

"I can fly now, remember?"

"Oh, right."

The jet was considerably fast; they reached Forest Park just shy of ten o’clock at night. As Marin was unbuckling herself from the passenger seat, Lucy pivoted in the pilot's chair. "And you're sure you don't need us to go with you?"

Marin shook her head. "No. This is something I need to do alone."

And as Marin took to the skies, she made sure to keep away from open streets, lest someone see her vibrant blue-glowing body flying through the air.

After only a couple minutes of navigating the streets of Forest Hills, Marin located Peter's apartment complex. She floated right up to the window, knocking into it slightly with her shoulder as she came to a jerky halt. She noticed Peter jump inside his room where he was standing at his desk, and then peer suspiciously out the window.

He walked toward her, and even though she could see he wasn't pleased to see her, he still pushed up the pane of glass, sticking his head out and glaring up at her. Marin moved back a little, indicating that she wasn't going to just barge right in. "What, so you can fly now?" He snarled at her. "Is that another secret you kept from me?"

Marin sighed, and shook her head at him. "Can I come in? I need to tell you a few things."

Peter stared at her, his expression annoyed yet mildly interested—but mostly just relenting. He exhaled after a few heartbeats and looked back at his closed door. "Not in here, I don't want to wake May up. Go to the roof," Marin nodded, backing up even further so Peter could climb out of the window after her. He clung to the wall, crawling up the side of the building. It was weird to see him do it without the suit, but Marin followed him anyway.

Her landing was unstable and she would've tripped against the graveled roof, but Peter's reflexes acted faster than he could remember his disdain for her. "Thanks," she gave him a grateful look as he steadied her, but Peter yanked his hands back and averted her gaze.

He stepped around her, going to sit on the edge of the roof with his feet dangling over the side. Marin, despite vertigo rolling around in her stomach from the heights, took the spot next to him. They sat in silence for a moment.

Just as Marin opened her mouth, Peter said suddenly, "Why didn't you tell me you're a mutant?" His voice was strained. He was wearing a Midtown sweatshirt, she noticed, as he tugged the sleeves over his hands. It was a nervous tick that Marin recognized from her own habits.

"I... it's kind of a long story." Marin winced, looking him in the eyes.

"Does it have to do with... y'know, your parents?" He cringed, and Marin's stomach twisted anxiously. She was really going to do this, wasn't she?

"Yes." She admitted, eyes shifting down at her hands, which gripped her knees so tightly her knuckles were white. "I... I'm going to tell you everything, Peter. Some of what Mr. Stark said was true, but the truth... the whole truth is complicated and messy, and I've... I've never told anyone else about what happened, so please don't—don't interrupt me until I'm done, because I don't know what would happen if I stopped."

Peter nodded skeptically, and Marin lifted her head up.

"So, I'll start at the beginning, I guess." Marin took a deep breath and began.

"I was born on February third of 2001 to my parents, Jamie and Kelly Frost. My dad... he grew up in an orphanage until he was kicked out when he was eleven because they thought he had schizophrenia. But the voices in his head were real, he just didn't know that he was really a mutant—a telepath, able to hear the minds of those around him.

"They had me really young, my parents. And my dad could never keep a job for more than a couple weeks, so it was up to my mom to provide for the family. But as a teacher in the city, she didn't earn much. We were happy, though, as far as I can remember.

"Truth be told, I don't really remember much, though. I remember some of the good bits, like my parents dancing with me to the music on the radio, or how my mother used to sing lullabies to get me to sleep."

Marin's breath grew shaky as she approached the worst parts of her story.

"But it's the bad parts that I remember the most. My father didn't know he was a mutant, and after a decade of hearing voices in his head, he was growing extremely paranoid. I remember he was always talking to himself, hitting and slamming things against any surface he could find. My mom would find him in these massive fits, and sometimes things got so bad that he would throw my mother around the room, or start beating her. My mom, though, she'd just... take it. She was so kind-hearted, so loving, and she'd never defended herself. She loved my father too much to stand up to him, and it became her undoing."

Marin clenched her eyes shut, the blood in her ears drowning out the noises of the city.

"It was all building to one final explosion. It was nine years ago, as of yesterday. I was six. I'd just come home from my first day of first grade, and I remember being really happy and excited to start the new school year. But I never made it to the second day.

"My dad was in the worst fit I'd ever seen him in. He was shouting into thin air, clutching his head so hard he'd ripped out chunks of his hair. My mom was trying to help him out of it, so she sent me to my room so I didn't have to watch. Normally, I'd obey her, locking myself in my room and burying my head under a pillow to muffle the screams. But I was feeling brave, and too concerned to leave. So instead, I followed them into the bathroom, where my father was thrashing in a drawn bath, still fully clothed. He was rocking back and forth, murmuring to himself angrily.

"As my mother tried to soothe him, he looked up at her—and for a brief moment, I saw his eyes clear. But the next second it was gone, and..." Marin inhaled a shaking breath, trembling violently as she gripped the concrete ledge of the complex. "And almost instantly, he had his hands wrapped around my mother's neck and he was throwing her into the bathtub, holding her under the water even as she struggled against him. It was the only time I'd ever seen her fight back. But it ultimately didn't matter. I watched as the water eventually went still, my mother's limbs went limp, and my father stumbled back as if he couldn't believe what he'd just done.

"He screamed out, telling the voices in his head to shut up, and grabbed the dryer left out by the sink. Somehow, he'd managed not to see me until he was clutching the plugged-in hairdryer in one hand, halfway into the bath. Then his eyes found mine, and he said 'they told me to do it'. He stepped into the water, and electrocuted himself."

It took a moment to compose herself. Marin was thankful that Peter had stayed silent through her story, but she wasn't finished. "I want to clarify something about mutants because I don't know how in-depth public schools teach about us."

She risked a glance at Peter, and was surprised to find tears trailing down his cheeks. He wiped them away, nodding.

"Mutants are born mutants—they already have the mutated gene in their DNA. It's a recessive, hereditary gene, so it's passed on through generations. But for the first several years of our lives, it lies dormant, waiting for something to trigger it. They're usually exposed when a mutant witnesses a traumatic event, or experiences a really powerful emotion. I think it has something to do with an enhanced sense of fight or flight, or for protection purposes or something. It's often destructive, and sometimes fatal, but rarely ever done on purpose.

"And, seeing... what had happened obviously triggered my mutant gene. You know that I can control water, so you can see how that kind of uncontrolled outburst can result in exploding all the pipelines in the building. But, as it turns out, I have a second, hidden power. Professor Xavier calls it Cosmic Energy manipulation, and it basically means that I can manipulate the energy that's normally found in, like, stars and stuff. It's hard to explain without detailing every nuance of astral and quantum physics. The only difference is, is that the energy is found inside me, and I don't need to draw on the energy from other sources like I do for my hydrokinetic powers. I can manipulate the energy to do pretty much anything I want it to do, hence, the flying.

"Anyway, my powers were unleashed to the fullest extent that night. I don't have any memory of what happened in the accident following my father's death—just waking up, surrounded by the decimated remains of my house. I was lucky that no one else was injured, even if the explosion did destroy the abandoned motel my parents had squatted in. When the emergency responders showed up, the entire building was in tatters, my parents' bodies were nothing but ashes, and I was untouched by it all. They didn't know what to think, so they called Charles Xavier.

"After he brought me to the Institute, he tried to figure out what exactly had happened. Charles is telepathic and extremely powerful, but even he couldn't access any memories I'd had, and therefore couldn't determine that my parents' deaths were a result of a murder-suicide, and not of my doing. So he assumed that it was my fault, and because I was uncooperative and traumatized, my Cosmic powers were growing increasingly unstable and destructive. He had no other reason to doubt my role in their deaths, and I gave him nothing to dissuade his opinion."

"I didn't notice that everyone was avoiding me. I didn't realize the looks they were giving me were ones of terror." Marin laughed dryly. "I didn't learn of the rumors until a new kid came to live at the school a few months after I did, and one of the older mutants stopped them just as they were walking up to me. The older student hissed at them, 'Don't go near her, she's dangerous. She'll kill you just like she killed her parents.' And of course, I retaliated, grew angry, and accidentally shot a blast of energy into the kid's leg, breaking it. Charles was freaked out, naturally, and he put a block on my mind so I wouldn't remember ever using my energy manipulation powers. It was supposed to keep everyone safe, but I felt the loss of those powers unconsciously, and I compensated in my hydrokinesis training.

"I spent most of my time training. I mastered most forms of martial arts by the time I was ten, and I could get a bullseye with every type of weapon blindfolded when I was twelve. I studied physics, and literature, and mechanical engineering until I could take any device apart and put it back together again. I was... I was missing something, and I thought that if I could fill it with knowledge and training, that I'd be okay again."

Marin shook her head. "But nothing motivated me more than the desire to help people. Every time I learned a new ability or mastered a new interest, all I wanted to do was show my mom. Then I'd remember the way she fought back, only to die in the end because no one was there to save her, and I'd burn with rage and helplessness. If only I'd had my powers, I could've saved her. I told myself that I wouldn't waste my powers—I'd never have to..."

Marin tilted her head to the sky, letting the wind sting her eyes until they burned and watered. "It's... I mean, have you ever had to watch as someone you loved so desperately, died right in front of your eyes while you watched, powerless to save them? I am haunted by that memory, that feeling of helplessness, and I fear that it will be my downfall, much like my mother's love for my father was hers."

"I have," Peter croaked quietly. Marin turned her head to look at him. There was so much pain in his eyes that it pushed the air out of her chest and clasped her heart in a sharp vice. "My uncle Ben—he was shot, right in front of me. And I was too late to stop the robber that killed him. I'd had my powers for a month, and hadn't used them for anything but selfish reasons. I'd had my powers, but didn't use them for anything good." It was his turn to draw in a shuddering breath. Marin scooted closer to him, brushing her shoulder against his, but otherwise not touching him. "He's why I do it. Why I became Spider-Man, and why I fight so hard to continue fighting bad guys, despite everything—my age, my schoolwork, May, everything. He told me once, 'with great power, comes great responsibility', and after he died, I felt like I was somehow letting him down if I didn't use them to help save those who can't save themselves."

"I know," Marin said. It seemed like it was all she could say. After a moment of silence, she confessed, "I hated being an X-Man, you know. I joined when I was thirteen after we watched the Avengers fight off an alien army on TV. I hated how we just sat there, watching as the world was in mortal danger, and we did nothing to help them. I wanted to save people, and I thought that I could do that as an X-Man. But I was wrong. All we ever did on missions was recruit new mutants and occasionally intercept drug trafficking rings. It was never enough for me. And so I acted out a lot, constantly got myself into trouble because I didn't like obeying orders and staying in line like an obedient little soldier." Marin pulled a face. "I played fast and loose with what lines I could cross as an X-Man, and I didn't care about the consequences. That's why I ran away that night, at the bank. The others heard those women screaming and they didn't care—they'd rather leave them to be killed so they could stick to the stupid orders Charles gave them. I wasn't going to be one of them, anymore.

"They don't care, mutants. All they care about is saving their own kind. Keeping us safe and hidden from the outside world, lest they try to hurt us. They don't care if humans are in danger; unless it's a threat to mutants, they refuse to help save anyone." Marin looked Peter in the eyes. "That's why I didn't tell you what I am. I didn't want to be a mutant if it meant that I'd have to pretend like I didn't care."

Marin sighed softly. "When I got kicked off the team, though, it hurt me more than I'd care to admit. I was a part of something, even if I didn't agree with their motivations. It was the only chance I had at being a hero, and I was too careless and lost it."

Peter ruminated in silence after Marin finished her tirade. The only sounds were the occasional honking of a car, the wind rustling branches and leaves, and their collective breathing.

"When I lost the suit, I felt like I lost a part of myself." He eventually said, his voice steady but low. "That's where we're different—you don't need to be an X-Man to be a hero, but I’m not Spider-Man without that suit. All I am is a stupid teenager who can climb walls and flip around. I’m no one if I’m not Spider-Man.”

Marin scoffed indignantly. "You're not no one—you're Peter Parker." She stared him down, pressing her sincerity into her gaze. "Spider-Man is not a suit. He's a person, and most importantly, he is you. You don't need that suit to be a hero, Pete. I should know, I knew you before you even had it."

Peter's eyes widened, gazing at her softly.

Before he could even think to object, Marin continued to confess, "You're why I left, you know. That night I ran away from the Institute." His expression changed, his eyes growing curious. "There's a reason why I came to you." She nudged his shoulder playfully.

"Why?" Peter whispered; his voice carried off slightly by the wind.

"Because I wanted to be like you." She tilted her head. "You stood down those men at gunpoint, wearing those ridiculous pajamas—"

"—they're not pajamas—"

"—and still saved those women." She grinned, purposely ignoring his protest. "Yeah, I helped some, but you went in there without any ulterior motive, and put your life on the line because you had to. I just went because I had a chip on my shoulder and a point to prove. But you... you going in there alone was both the bravest and stupidest thing I've ever seen someone do."

Peter chuckled. Marin pointed into his chest. "That was Spider-Man. He didn't need that fancy piece of fabric to be a hero, and you know why? Because it's you who's the hero, Peter. Not only did you save those women and countless others, you also gave me a place to sleep when I needed it the most. You gave me hope, and the courage to fight for myself. You gave me a sense of belonging that I've never found anywhere else." Marin smiled sadly. "Don't you see? You don't need to be super to be a hero. You're super because you are a hero. And I know for a fact that your uncle would be proud of you—with or without your powers, no matter what suit you wear."

Peter choked on a sob, curling into himself. Marin wrapped her arms around his trembling body, going to rub his back gently; but at her touch, he twisted, tucking into her chest. Moving her hand from his back to his neck, she ran tender fingers through his hair, soothing him with hushed sounds and words of comfort. It amazed her how quickly this turned from an exposition to an exchanging of bared souls.

They stayed like that until Peter finished crying, and his breath evened out. He nuzzled his face into her shoulder with a deep inhale, and spoke into her jacket, "Your mother would be proud of you, too, Marin."

Marin squeezed him tighter, feeling a fresh tear slide down her cheek. "We do it for them, Peter Parker, and we do it for ourselves."

endnotes:

Marin’s father had no idea he was a mutant, and everyone thought that his telepathic powers were actually symptoms of schizophrenia. Because he wasn’t trained on how to control his powers and was unstable, he often abused Marin’s mother. It all culminated to one night where he drowned Marin’s mother in the bathtub and then electrocuted himself.

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