#i have been planning this since last april i am so relieved for it to be DONE
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Moon 26, Part 2.
Blood, injury, and death cw.
Dark deals have dire consequences. Flashing gif panel below the cut
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Start from the beginning
Moon 24 Allegiances
Family Tree
Author's Note: Rowan's eyes do not visibly change color, it's just that way to show when Thornshadow is controlling him.
#sorry everyone :')#i have been planning this since last april i am so relieved for it to be DONE#a whopping 50 PAGES after the original omen#i really hope my delivery didnt flop#this is my first time doing anything like this haha#sooo.. yep. murder :D#flashing cw#flashing gif#eyestrain#cw blood#cw animal injury#cw animal death#cw murder#idk what all to cw this i hope i covered it all#clangen#clan generator#clangen comic#warriors#warrior cats#warriors oc#cutieclan#cutieclan moon#hollysong#halfpelt#rowanbark#fawnstar#sanddapple#swirldrop
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new blog post: my dumb ear
new blog post on https://mizkit.com/my-dumb-ear/
my dumb ear

In a blog post of spectacular unimportance, I am so very happy to say that my dumb ear, in which I got a helix piercing on October 19, 2022, has actually healed!
The remainder of this post may involve vague grossness that the delicate among us might not want to read. Not lots of grossness, but a bit. :)
After noticing that it seemed to have (for want of a better phrase) dried up a lot recently, I went in to have it checked yesterday. The nice woman, who I think was an entirely new person from anybody else who’d ever looked at it, examined it quite closely and said it’s still a bit red and sort of swollen/chunky-feeling, but that there is FINALLY no more moisture or “goo,” as I was calling it (“secretions,” she said, “that’s the professional word for ‘goo,'”) inside the ear hole anymore. So basically it’s HEALED! It still needs time to rest and hopefully the remaining swelling will fade, but honestly I’m so glad. I’ve been fighting the sunk cost fallacy with it for months, trying to convince myself that if it hadn’t healed by October 19 (which would be the 2 year mark) that I should give it up, but after spending so much TIME trying to get it to heal I really didn’t WANT to, and also I LIKE it, so I’ve been agonizing and kind of miserable about it.
But. This is actually a huge step forward. It’s HEALED, not just mostly healed or almost there, but actually no longer an open wound and I’m so incredibly relieved.
Right now I’ve got a hoop in it–I have since maybe March? Maybe April? Maybe January? I don’t even remember, but I think March. It hadn’t healed with a stud and the hoop was kind of the last-ditch attempt to see if it would heal. They don’t usually use hoops because they move more and are easier to knock around, which can cause, healing issues, but since the front hadn’t healed in 15-18 months ANYWAY they figured trading the stud for a hoop wasn’t going to hurt it at that point, and it might help. Which it has! If I’m going to have a random earring in it while it continues to settle I’d rather it was a stud, but also…I think I’ll leave the hoop in place until at least October, because even though I really want to trade it out for a stud I also don’t want to aggravate it at what is presumably a fairly early stage of Actually Healed.
Anyway, the point of that paragraph was more or less going to be “I suspect that overall I’m going to want to choose a permanent stud for that ear hole, because I suspect it may remain delicate and it might be better to just leave one there rather than take them in and out,” but that’s also probably a problem for Future Me. I have a tiny diamond earring I bought in college when I got my 2nd piercing in my left ear that may end up being the permanent earring there, but I wouldn’t want to sleep on it, so…well, we’ll see how the whole thing heals up in the longer term.
I’m really relieved I chose not to take action when the woman in May who looked at it when it had REALLY gooed up said I had cartilage slippage and it would never heal and that I should take it out. It wasn’t that I was certain she was wrong, but it was at a really bad swollen stage right then and I’d seen it like that before and it had calmed down, so at the very least I wanted it to calm down before I made a decision about removing it. I went back in about a month later when it had calmed and they said it was still ‘moist’ (not a word you really want to hear about a wound, especially one almost 2 years old) but that there wasn’t any sign of slippage or anything, so, like, I THOUGHT SO. And now two months after THAT it has finally reached the tentative stage of Actually Healed.
Man, this was supposed to be part of my Stuff I Wanted To Do To Celebrate Turning Fifty. I planned for this 4th ear hole on the left side and to get a 3rd on the right side, and then maybe get the tattoo I’ve been thinking about for years. But I didn’t want to get the right ear pierced again until I knew if the left one was gonna heal, because I’ve never wanted a matching number of ear holes. I’ve always wanted 1 more on the left than on the right. So I couldn’t get a non-cartilage-piercing that would almost certainly heal up just fine before the damn helix one healed. So I got the left one done SEVEN AND A HALF MONTHS before my birthday, ’cause that should be enough time, right? And now here I am, 51 and counting, and that piercing has only just now healed. I can still do the rest, obviously, but, like, who gets body mods to celebrate turning 52? That’s just weird, not, like, you know, a Statement or a Decisive Action or whatever. :)
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Siargao
Day 1 - April 27, Thursday
Asis and I were off to Siargao, our first in-air trip for this year. We met up with our friends who had been on the island for a few days, around 2 pm. After a quick break and settling in, Asis rented a scooter, and we started exploring General Luna. We had a late lunch at Kurvada and couldn't resist trying every flavor of ice cream at Jorene’s Homemade Ice Cream.
Later, our group gathered at the Catangnan-Cabitoonan bridge to watch the sunset, and I was surprised to see many tourists there, mostly foreigners. We wrapped up the day with dinner at Isla Cusina and returned to our rental for an evening of drinks, card games, and catching up. The first day was a bit tiring due to the long journey so we called it a night around 9 pm.


















Day 2 - April 28, Friday
We were all up before 6 am, eager to start our island adventure. Luckily, the weather was on our side that day. We hopped on our scooters and hit the road together. Our first pitstop was this cool vacant lot that led to the beach. Afterward, we searched for a cozy spot to have breakfast. We found Kawayan Gourmand. We arrived pretty early, so we patiently hung out while they prepped and baked their croissants and pastries. Let me tell you, those freshly baked croissants were just *chef’s kiss*.
Following our delightful breakfast, we made our way to Cloud 9, conveniently within walking distance from the breakfast spot. While Asis and Beth decided to hit the waves for a surfing session, the rest of us opted to relax on the sandy shore, watching them ride the waves from a distance.
When they got tired from all the paddling, we decided to head back to our place to grab some stuff for our land trip. But just before that, the guys had secretly helped plan Darren's surprise proposal to Beth, catching me off guard. It turned out they had been working on this plan for a while. The idea was straightforward: as they walked along the boardwalk, Darren would kneel down and ask for her hand in marriage while the rest of us were far away, taking a video and flying a drone documenting the event. All of this unfolded at only 9 am.
We also visited Coconut Trees View Deck, and we passed by Maasin River and Paghungawan Marsh. By 11 am, we had made it to Magpopongko Rock Pools and Flats, which was about an hour's ride from General Luna. We decided to have our lunch, pass the time, and wait for the tide to go down, hoping to explore the rock pools. Unfortunately, our plans fell through due to the high tide. The weather had been rather unpredictable, with sporadic rain clouds, which led us to the decision to head back. Around 2 pm, we hit the road again, and to our dismay, the back tire of our scooter went flat. Since we were the last pair on the bike, the two couples in front of us had no idea what had happened. There was no phone signal in the area, so we couldn’t update them and they couldn't reach us. We were relieved that this happened during the day, and it wasn't raining. The nearest vulcanizing shop was a kilometer away, so we had to turn back. Asis pushed the scooter while I took lots of photos of our surroundings and cheered him on. Definitely one for the books!



After we got back on the road, we spotted the rest of the group waiting on the roadside. They had already gone quite a distance before realizing that we were no longer following behind them. So yuuuup, we were all beat for the day. At dinner time, we ate and chilled at BARREL: Beachfront Sports Bar, and finally, we called it a night.
Day two was undoubtedly an unforgettable adventure.
Btw, another highlight of the day was spotting a large, red bird with a prominent beak, which I later identified as a Rufous hornbill. As a passenger princess on the back of the scooter, I had the opportunity to see a lot of beautiful things, making it one of my favorite aspects of this trip. ♡
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I am hoping I have just passed through the last nasty messy storm of the season. I mean, it's Ontario, so likely not, but the associated migraine was -bad-. It's still going out there until sometime Friday but I've downgraded to just a sharp sinus headache, which I will tolerate. There's snow out there today, but it's likely the warmer days coming next week will have our ash tree starting to leaf out.
I was very much looking forward to Beltane this year, but it appears that we are not gathering again this year. I mean, them's the breaks... but I'm still a little put out. I feel like we've lost some serious momentum since the pandemic. I'll throw something together here for myself - it might be something a little different than my usual (but will still involve sexy goats).
I have to admit that I am relieved to have more time to paint some statuary I've been procrastinating about. I'm still poking away at my beading, so there'll be plenty of new stuff in the bead box for Summer Solstice.
I keep wondering if I should try to take some photos of some of the things I've made for myself lately. They don't get much engagement on here when I do, but I still like to show them off sometimes. Having some pictures to share on here breaks up all these personal posts where I type into the void.
How is it already April? The summer looms, suddenly. It's time to shove the anxiety down, make some devious plans and get sorted before it gets any closer. I hope I'm up to the task.
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Project Updates (August 8th, 2024)
Art Show So the BIG news with RezDragon is that YES! My art has been accepted into a fine art show. Like a REAL fine art show, with judges and WINE. It's to promote the local artists of the Inland Northwest, which includes ME THIS YEAR! I tried to submit to this last year and I did not get in, but that's changed this year and I am VERY EXCITED AND HAPPY ABOUT IT! So what does this mean? Well, it means I'm going to be HARD focusing on preparing for the show for the rest of August (aside from one project, you know what it is). I have to get everything ready by September. One of the pieces I put in is an installation piece and that is the biggest prep I have. So kinda expect me to maybe go more dark than usual? I dunno, I might post pics as I work on shit.
The One Other August Project (You Know What It Is) It'll be out tomorrow.
TDA - Everyday With how shit my mental health has been lately, I haven't had the motivation to work on this. Rez keeps trying to drag me back in, but it's just not coming back to me yet. I want to start writing the script and I was GOING TO in August, but then the Art Show Acceptance letter showed up and WELL. Sorry Rez, best wait till September. I have been taking notes occasionally when I think of something new. She's on my mind, I swear.
Running With the Devil (what the fuck is this) RWTD is Ash's story that started out accidentally. I was writing up a lot of facts about Ash herself and then the next thing I knew, I started writing scenes and then a month and a half later, I had an 87 page novella. Oops, how'd that happen. This has VERY much been a comfort project to help keep my spirits up while I've been so unhappy lately, and it's been doing a good job of it. It is not meant to be good, it might be, I dunno. It's me giving in and writing cute romance between a demon girl and her lesbian girlfriend. But uh... you won't see it, at least not all of it. I'll be real with you as to why: it's an erotica story and I don't want erotica associated with the RezDragon name. It's not that I'm ashamed of writing it, I'm not, but once you start down that path, that's all you're known for and I do. not. want. that. So I will only be showing the non-horny chapters, or perhaps the story censored. Anyways, chapter 1 (30 pages, yes 30, 20,000+ word count) is available on Sheezy if you so choose. I didn't advertise this because I was a little too depressed to when I posted it.
Next Album Project(s) I have two new albums to place on the stove, or at least their concepts. First one I plan to have it be as raw and uncomfortable at Kintsugi and Tasukete- DE aka more depressing harsh noise crap. Working title right now is "Nothing Has Changed." Second one is another "story" album, i.e. like Horizon. Instead of space, this one takes place in the woods and back in the 80's. I won't talk about its full concept yet, giving myself a break from music work (and also I can't really work on music right now)
Not a Project, but a Health Update So I've been griping about it lately, but my left hip/pelvis/leg area has been in a lot of pain since April of this year. It went away near the end of May and I was able to return to work, but then it came back after a week. I tried to work through it, which only seemed to make the problem way worse. Since June, I have been in non-stop pain, with barely anything relieving it (it's why I've had a lot of extra time to write as of late). I've actually been in a lot of money trouble because of not being able to work and disability being a nightmare, but I've avoided talking about it on my RezDragon accounts (except for Sheezy) to keep that kind of stuff away from my art. I've started physical therapy, which has been going well in giving me some relief. I've been using a cane since April just to get around. I can't say I've noticed any improvements and I'm afraid I might be out of day job work until at least October. I can't even get a new job where I sit all day, because if I sit up for too long, that spikes up my pain; I have to sit reclined or lie in bed. I missed the whole summer, I wanted to go swimming :( So anyways, that's why I've been mostly focused on writing, it's the easiest thing for me to do atm.
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The art of self-harm
My name is Andrew Alexander Dennis Iero, and yes, I cut my wrists.
I don't know the specific information, from what my parents have told me since I was little I was very self-destructive. I remember that the first time I wanted to cut my wrists was when I was 9 years old, I didn't do a big deal to be honest, I didn't have much privacy back then. At 11, it was the first time I self-harmed and left a scar, but it wasn't a laceration, it was a burn. On the back of my right hand, perfectly planned as if it had been a crime.
At 11 years old, February 2022, I decided to steal a scalpel blade from my mother, she is a nurse, at that time she was, currently I don't know what the hell it is. I cut myself on my finger, I think on my left hand, I was very exaggerated, I put a bandage on for a cut that didn't even reach a cat scratch. That same year, in April if I remember correctly, with the same scalpel blade I cut off part of my left hand, I felt so happy, I felt so relieved, it was like a holy remedy for me. I felt so light, so... free, but at the same time I was terrified, what point in my life had I reached?
A few days later, I had a terrible nightmare; I woke up one morning like any other, I went downstairs to have breakfast, but I had a feeling that made me stop in my parents' room (which at the same time is the center of the upstairs), I approached the window as if something was calling me and I saw a van parked outside my house, closer to the neighbors on the right, a small child came out of it with a stuffed dog hugging, when the van started to suddenly lost the balance and fell on top of the child, crushing him completely and squeezing out his insides in front of my eyes. I had that feeling when you're dreaming and you feel like you're going to fall, but I was in the dream and I didn't feel like I was going to fall, I felt like the fucking van was going to crush me alive. After that I ran to the stairs and saw my dad and my older brother, they were both safe. I woke up, terrified.
From that day on two things happened; It became a habit for me to cut my arms and nightmares became everyday things for me.
I kept going, my older brother found out, that didn't stop me, did I mention that I started hurting myself because of academic pressure? When that ended I didn't stop either, maybe I no longer had the urgency, but the need persisted. May, June, July, August passed and I entered high school in person, I was already 12 years old. Should have seen my emotional downturn after going in there. September passed, I got sick, October came, they gave me dental braces that I stopped using, November began and things went from bad to worse, I cut myself, my hand, my arm, my legs, December came and with this came too... . "He". It was actually there before, but I didn't see it, I just felt it. It kept cutting me more and more.
I don't want to talk about 2023, not its first half, not now. An incident made me start to cut myself not with scalpel blades, but with pencil sharpener blades. I cut my fingers, my wrists. The end of that year came, not only did I cut myself punctually with scalpel blades again, I also burned myself with ice and salt when no one saw me.
2024; I kept cutting myself, but now I don't just make meaningless lines, now I draw things with the razor, things that only I understand, and here I am now, excited like a child with a new toy to try another form of pain.
You can draw conclusions as to why I cut myself and hurt myself, it is not because of depression; I have never had depression, I have feelings of sadness of course, but I don't like to call them depression or depressive symptoms or something like that. It's not to attract attention; The last thing I want is for people, especially people I know, to know about this. It is not for sexual pleasure; People who get excited by pain disgust me, no sexual stimulation arouses me.
Is it because... why?
Because... because of the... it's because I... it's because...
Is it for... art?
Art
Kurt Cobain talks a lot about how strong the word art is...
Art
It's for art
Shit, so confusing.
Art
.
.
.
The art of self-harm.
-Burn
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April 11, 2023
Sleep last night wasn't exactly that great. My body tends to not sleep very deeply when it knows that it's going to be the first day of the week that it's going back to work. Same with Eddie. Went to the train station around 5.45am and gave each other a kiss goodbye. He's kind of sweet for that. Arrived in Waterloo just in time for my 6.27am train back to Norbiton and got back home even before 7am. Passed by Little Waitrose to get me my favorite double espresso shot with milk in a can by Starbucks. It's really the best, mind you. It only costs, like, what? 1.5£? It's a steal. Gotta get your caffeine in your system.
Got to work at around 7.35am and there wasn't really much to do. Most cases have been cancelled and only the local Plastic list was running. Relieved the staff there for a while until most of them have had their breaks and helped arrange and clean some stuff in the unit. Went to lunch with Carla and Dani in the canteen. The day at work was very uneventful. Went home at around 5.30pm.
I could see the end of my schedule in Kingston in my work roster and it's kind of giving me mixed feelings. I THINK I won't be planning a big leaving due party for me. I'm shy. I just planned to bring food on my last day and that's it but the boys in the unit are asking if I did want to go on a fishing trip with them along with the others too as my leaving due party. It's kind of cute how they're thinking of planning this in my behalf and even if it won't happen, I guess I'm fine. I'm fine with the thought of them having have thought of me and how to make my last day with them memorable for me. They're literally the cutest.. and also the best.
Went to the gym and got there around 6.40pm-ish. Did legs, a bit of arms (so I could do it again tomorrow), and abs. Forgot to do some push-ups but nevermind, I'll do chest and shoulders tomorrow.
SZA's having her concert here in London by June 17 and 18, I think. Me, Porcia, Kim, and JC are going. I'm gonna make a groupchat and we're all going to be going to the concert. I'm so excited! Can't wait to bawl singing Kill Bill. Cancelled my meetup with John this Sunday. I know and feel that he's not into it as much as we were two weeks ago so why bother, right? But I am meeting up with JC this Sunday. Maybe around Shoreditch, he says. I have so many stories to tell him, my gosh. I think I'll just cry, to be fucking honest. My time here in the UK is anything but easy and to have another Zamboangeno hear my unheard and unspoken experiences, it's going to be so emotional for me.
Also have spoken to someone from Facebook Marketplace about buying a closet... Ed's landlords have okayed me getting one since they won't get me, which is kind of understandable considering Ed has a wardrobe and a chest of drawers. I just have to consult with Eddie if he'd think he'd like the design.
Went to Aldi after going to the gym and bought some essentials for my lunch and snacks at work. Going back to protein shakes in the morning. I have to build muscle. I'm not building any.
Thoughts... Mmm? I was overthinking again... but I didn't let the thoughts get too deep in my skin. I guess this is what I meant about what I wrote yesterday, that I feel more equipped handling difficult situations like this.
Just waiting for a call from Eddie then will cap the night off.
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Foosball,Flyfishing
& "Friends"
Pairing: Price x MC (Wren, nickname Osprey) GN! Reader
Summary
John and Wren have been inseparable for the last 6 years, but neither one of them wants to admit that their relationship is nowhere near "platonic". They are released on leave for 3 months and Wren decides to take a trip back home to the states. They want to ask if John wants to go. They're just two very close friends who enjoy each others company right? What could happen?
Word Count: 5.5k ish
Author’s Note
Hello! So this is my first time posting any kind of writing since 2014. So please bare with me I may be a little rusty 😅 I just want to write some fluff and enjoy some domestic Price fly fishing. This is a two parter, maybe three depending on what I can finish by the 4th of Feb. I fly out the 6th for a job and will have limited access to internet until April, so I wanted to get this posted before I left.
Also want to note that I am not sure how much time would be between each mission, but for this we’ll say it’s around 3 months. Hope you find as much joy in this as I did!
Warnings
Too much fluff
Language
Nightmares
Slight talks of injuries
*NOT EDITED*
Part 2
______________________________________________________________
You quietly make your way through the dark and chilly halls of base. It was well into the night almost guaranteeing everyone was asleep except for the person you were looking for. A faint glow could be seen from under the door to your captain's office. Though you felt it selfish, you were relieved to see he was still awake. When you reach it you quietly knock and open the door. The room was dark with just the warm glow of the desk lamp and embers of a cigar resting on a try. John looks up and offers you a tired soft smile putting down his pen.
"Hey Osprey."
The codename made your heart flutter every time he said it.
He relaxes in his chair and opens his arms. You slowly make your way over sitting on his lap. Your normal uptight demeanour relaxes almost instantly as his strong arms engulf you making you feel safe. You hide your face in his neck, closing your eyes. This had become routine after a rough mission, but lately it's been happening more often. If you weren't going to him he'd be coming to you. You were the only ones that could bring each other back from the brink of destruction. Sometimes you'd talk about what was bothering you, but usually you just held each other until one of you fell asleep. It was your typical run-of-the-mill platonic relationship right? After all, you two had known each other for almost 6 years. Why would your relationship change all of a sudden?
You noticed that during this last mission things were evolving. Everyone noticed except John seemed to have been left out. He was much more protective over you to the point it caused the two of you to not speak for days other than exchanging plans. Thankfully the two of you made up, but there was still something off about the situation. You just couldn't put your finger on it.
You're brought out from your thoughts wincing as his hand gently grazes the wound on your shoulder. A nasty reminder of how the last mission had gone.
"Sorry love, how are you doing by the way? I know things have been hectic since we got back,"
With a yawn you sit up to look at him. His piercing blue eyes scan your face with concern.
"I'm doing alright just been having trouble sleeping because my comfy pillow has been busy." You tease with a smile and heavy eyelids. His warm presence is already lulling you to sleep. You lean back into the same position you were in with a little thud and he chuckles.
"You might need to get a new pillow then. Its seems that one isn't doing his job"
"Yeah, but he's more important things to pay attention to. I'll manage," you laugh at the ridiculous conversation.
He tightens his hold and lays his head on top of yours as he sighs,
"I know, I've been neglecting my pillow duties. I'll make it up to you."
You felt lucky. The others didn't get to see this side of John. He cared for his team and their wellbeing, but he still puts on a tough exterior, except when it was just the two of you.
"You know, this is really dangerous,"
You felt his chest rumble as he chuckles, "And why do you say that?"
"I think I'm starting to like you." You mumble sleepily. Though you said it jokingly, deep down you really mean it and it scares the life out of you. How could you start to have feelings now after all these years? Have you always had them and just pushed them down? It didn't matter. He was your captain and your friend. You're not about to ruin that.
He chuckles again and squeezes you even closer, "It's a little too late for that realisation don't you think?"
You laugh with a quiet "Mhm" and close your eyes again. You felt his large warm hand glide up and down your back lulling you asleep.
Sunshine peeks through the blinds into your face waking you up. John is still fast asleep. He's sprawled out in his chair with one foot propped on his desk and both arms wrapped securely around you. You smile to yourself enjoying the moment.
Before long John begins to stir and you feel yourself rise as he carefully sits up.
"Well good morning sunshine," You tease.
He rubs the back of his neck probably sore from the way he slept, "Good morning Osprey," his voice is raspy and tired as he tries to keep his eyes open. You wonder how much sleep he got. You try to get up, but you're pulled back into the chair. John wraps his arms around your waist and you feel sparks. A sense of giddiness floods your nerves as he rests his cheek against your back,"Please stay just a few more minutes." He whispers exhaustion radiating in his voice. He'd never been this clingy before, but you weren't complaining.
Your heart is racing as you try to compose yourself before asking, "Did you get any sleep?"
"Hmm, the last I remember is the sun coming up. What time is it now?"
You looked down at your watch,"It's only 7,"
"Have you been awake for long?"
You shake your head. You can tell he's trying to keep himself awake by how much he pauses between each word.
Rubbing your thumb over his knuckles you chuckle,"Go lay on the couch and try to get some sleep. I'll wake you before lunch."
He hums in response,”I’ll just rest my eyes for a little longer.”
His warm embrace soon releases you as you both stand up and he trudges over plopping down on the couch. Soon after you hear tiny snores escaping from his relaxed figure.
You use this time to contemplate what you were going to do now that the team was on leave for the next three months. Normally you’d stay on base or travel around the UK or Europe, but you were feeling homesick. A small town in Montana is where you call home and it's been almost two years since you had the chance to go back. You look over at John who’s still fast asleep. You bite the inside of your cheek. There’s no harm in asking right? You’ve been on plenty of trips with him before. The only difference was at least one other person was always around. This time it would just be the two of you. You purse your lips before letting air escape from your nostrils. Fuck it. The worst he could say is no, and even then that wouldn’t be so bad. Confident in your decision you curl up in the chair deciding to set an alarm just in case you fall asleep, but instead your mind wanders about all the different possibilities of this trip.
Before you know it your alarm is vibrating on the desk. You glance over to John before picking it up. He turns over, his hand dropping to the floor with a thud. He grunts running his other hand over his face before sitting up and looking over at you.
“Sleep well?” You ask standing up.
“It was good enough.” He never slept as well when you weren't near him, but he wouldn't admit it.
“I’m going to go grab some food if you want to come with me or I could bring you something back?”
“I was thinking we could go off base? I need a change of scenery.” He stands up and stretches, his shirt rides up slightly and you can’t help but stare. You realise what you're doing and shake your head. You then remember back to your proposal earlier. You’d ask during lunch.
“Sounds good. These grey walls do make me gloomy.” You joke walking out the door to head back to your room.
There's a cute little restaurant nestled in the outskirts of town. Vines of ivy adorn the building giving it a cozy feel, and on the inside the walls are filled with objects and photographs of families, celebrations and the annual foosball (or as your teammates would call it “table football”) champions. The floors creak as you walk to sit down in your usual spot. You smile up at the picture of John, Soap, Gaz and you grinning triumphantly with a little plastic trophy from the last time you were here.
“Feels like ages ago doesn’t it?” John smiles at you warmly.
“Yeah we should try to do it again at some point,” you look down at the menu even though you knew what you were getting. Now was a better time than any to ask, but why were you so nervous? You lick your lips putting your menu down,”Do you have any plans for leave?”
He shakes his head,”I was just going to go back home why?”
“I was thinking of heading back home myself, to the states. Thought you’d like to tag along this time. I could show you around, and if you really wanted to I could even take you to those touristy places. I’ve got ties to most of them so we might be able to see it without all the people.”
”I’d love that,” he grins, sipping his tea,”It’ll be interesting to see what the notorious Osprey did back in the day.”
See that wasn’t so bad.
The two of you continue talking and begin planning your trip. Before you leave you decide to go a round on the foosball table. Thankfully there isn't anyone in the room which you're grateful for. You can let loose for a bit.
You stand on your side of the table with your legs spread, knees bent and serious expression as you focus on the players. John smiles at the scene. He adores your competitiveness when it comes to these types of things.
"I know the stakes are high, but damn. You're going to bore a hole in the table before we even start." He laughs, placing the tiny ball in the middle of the table.
"I'm getting that cigar and there is no way you're getting into my sketchbook,"
They were silly stakes, but if you know John Price you know how important his cigars are to him. Your sketchbook was very dear to you. You brought it everywhere to capture moments and scenery. It was a way to ground yourself and remember the special moments, but no one was allowed to look at them.
"We'll see about that," he copies your stance with a smug grin.
You're the first to have the ball as you move from side to side trying to keep it. You make the shot and it gets clipped by one of John's players flinging it back to the middle.
You groan,"Oh come on."
He takes control of the ball as you're both yelling at the little players. After constantly going back and forth for about 15 minutes John scores. You swear under your breath.
"Best 2 out of 3?" You give him a toothy grin.
He put his hands on the ridge of the table leaning forward with a smug grin, "That'd mean doubling the stakes wouldn't it?"
"Ok, what do you want?" You cross your arms across your chest.
He leans back thinking. He smiles to himself before shaking his head, "I want you to take me fly fishing."
You drop your arms to your side chuckling, "I honestly thought you were going to put me on power washing duty or something,"
"I don't trust you or Soap with the power washer. Last time you both spent over an hour drawing in the concrete," he huffs shaking his head.
"We got it cleaned in the end didn't we?" You laugh, placing the ball back on the table,"Ok for my double or nothing, forget the cigar, if I win you have to shave your face," you grin with your hands behind your back.
He scoffs, running a hand over his beard,"No way. I'll give you a whole box of my cigars before I do that,"
"Oh come on, I thought you were confident in your foosball abilities?"
He pauses for a second,"You know, you're right. What am I worrying about?"
The table rattles as you both fling and twist the rods to take control of the ball. For a split second John glances at you taking in the scene. He loved little moments like these with you. It was like you were a different person. In the field you were cold and stern except when you were comforting someone, but here right now, you're relaxed and goofy and he loves every bit of it. He's thrown out of the trance when you start doing a little happy dance spinning around.
"Baby face Price here we come!"
He gives you a hearty laugh, "Don't get cocky now sweetheart. You just caught me off guard."
"Yeah sure sure. Whatever floats your boat Captain."
The next round lasts a little longer, but John manages to score the last shot.
"Ah I can't wait to see what masterpieces you keep hidden away," he smiled triumphantly.
You sneer trying to keep the smile off your face. You were secretly excited that he'd get to see your works. You just hope he likes them. You're bummed out that you wouldn't get to see the team's reaction when they saw their Captain without any facial hair though.
"Oh come on, cheer up. You'll have other opportunities. No one likes a sore loser," a mischievous grin grows on his face as he cautiously makes his way to you.
"Johnathan Price you better not," You point at him bracing yourself to make a run for it still trying to keep the smile off your face. He takes a bigger step than you anticipate and you yelp running to the other side of the room. It's a short chase, both of you laughing like a bunch of children before he cuts you off wrapping his arms around you tickling you. Oh how he loves hearing you giggle. It always warms his heart when he is graced with the sound.
Your giggles erupt from your chest as you flail your limbs trying to get him to stop.
He stops for a moment, "Forgot to ask, but do I need to get a can of worms for the fish too?" he grins, still holding you in his lap.
You roll your eyes laughing "No Neal you don't need worms, but be sure to bring sunscreen."
He raises his eyebrows, "Oh it's going to be that type of trip huh?"
You shove him laughing,"You're such an ass."
"Ouch right in the heart," He fains hurt making you roll your eyes again.
"Ah you'll live Captain," you joke leaning back away from him. You try to hide your grimace as you roll your shoulder.
"I completely forgot about your shoulder. Are you ok?"
You give a small laugh seeing how his expression did a 180 from mischievous to worried.
"Yes I'm ok, I did too honestly," you try to look at it.
He gently lifts the bandage,"Stitches still look good. Must have just irritated it," he gives you an apologetic smile.
"That's good. I'll take something for it tonight. Don't worry, I'll be alright." You stand up offering your hand, "Now what do you say we get out of here? It's karaoke night. Remember how much we love that?" You chuckle quietly remembering the time the two of you were drunk off your asses and decided to sing a duet to Elton John's "Don't Go Breaking My Heart."
He groans, "Oh god please let's get out of here before that starts." He takes your hand as he stands up, "We might have time to go to Knacker's. I haven't had any in ages."
"Can never say no to Knacker's."
The two of you walk hand in hand back to the truck. Neither of you want to let go, but you didn't want to admit it either. Once you reach Knacker's and get your custard you decide to take a stroll along the pier and down to the beach.
It was later in the evening now and the sun was starting to set. Some families were starting to pack up and others were enjoying the sunset. A stray football comes whizzing by, but John's quick thinking keeps it from going into the ocean. He smiles at the kid kicking it back. They pick it up with a grin and a 'thank you' as they run back to the group of kids playing. It was short and sweet, but seeing John with kids always made your heart flutter.
You find a place to sit and finish your custard. The sky was now a pinkish colour with hints of gold scattered across the sky.
"It's nice being able to just relax and be normal for a change you know?" You pulled your knees to your chest and rested your hands and chin on them.
"It is. Not very often we get to huh?"
He leans back on his hands, sighing.
It was silent for a bit before a thought came to your mind.
"Have you ever thought of retiring? From the military I mean."
"Not really. It's something I always thought I'd do until I can't. I would have liked to of settled down, but it's too late for that."
You look over at him with soft eyes, "I wouldn't say it's too late. You've still got time."
You see a distant flash of sadness in his eyes as he looks to the sky, but it quickly changes to that of a more joking expression to try and hide what he's really thinking,"I've got to find someone that can handle me," he nudges your shoulder playfully, "I can be quite the handful."
You laugh,"Oh I'm well aware of that trust me."
As the sun sets further below the horizon clouds begin to form and it starts to drizzle.
"I guess we should get going before the bottom falls out," you sigh.
John gives you a questioning and amused look, "Before what?"
"Before the bottom falls out?" You roll your eyes and laugh, "before it starts raining really hard."
"Between you and McTavish I can't keep up with your slang sometimes." He chuckles,"but I guess we should get going."
He stands up and offers his hand and you grab it hoisting yourself up. You make it to the truck to see that the parking lot is empty.
Before you get in you stop,"You know what I've always wanted to do?"
"What's that?"
"Dance in the rain. It's not lightning and no one's here." You grab your phone from your pocket and go to your dance playlist.
The rain is heavier now. Not too hard, but enough that your clothes are soaked. John leans against the hood of the truck and smiles in amusement and amazement at you watching as you dance around letting the music guide your movements. You look so free and happy.
He joins and the two of you dance and laugh until you accidentally bump into him almost making the two of you fall, but John catches you pulling you back to him. You're laughing hysterically while he's looking at you with a crinkle eye smile, "You're quite something you know that?"
It all felt so euphoric. All you can do is give him a dopey smile. It was then you realise how close he was to you and you can feel your cheeks heat up.
He looks at your lips and back up at you. He's about to lean down when a clap of thunder makes both of you jump back.
"I think that's our cue to get going." He internally curses at himself for suggesting it and losing his chance.
You chuckle as you nod and the both of you take off for the truck.
A cold shiver runs down your spine as the air comes on. You quickly turn the vent away from you and turn on the heated seat. You prop up against the window with your arm looking outside.
"Have you started packing yet?"
You look over at him, "Yeah I did last night. I still have a little bit to pack though. Why?"
"I have to talk with Laswell, but I do not want to spend another night on that God awful cot. Do you want to head back to my place after?"
"It would be nice to have an actual bed," You chuckle propping your elbow on the middle console, "I hope I'm dried by then because I'm about to freeze my ass off."
He chuckles, reaching behind him,"Take my jacket. It'll keep you warm."
You grab the jacket and put it on. The famous smell of cedar and cigars engulf you as you close your eyes and smile.
"Thank you."
"Don't take too much of a liking to it though. That's one of my favourites,"
"Mmm you're never getting this back. It's mine now," you tease, shrinking into your seat closing your eyes.
He chuckles, shaking his head. He admits he loves seeing you in his clothes. Something about it just made him feel so warm inside.
The ride back was quiet compared to on the way out. The silence was filled with the gentle patter of rain and the radio. John smiles over at you. Your hair was starting to curl up as it dried. Something you had complained about multiple times in the past, but he thought it was cute.
You're still asleep as you pull into base. John gently nudges you,"Alright Osprey, we're back."
You groan not wanting to move from the warm cocoon you had made yourself, but against your better judgement you open your eyes and take the jacket off placing it on the console for later. You hop out of the truck following John into the building.
"I'll come get you when I get out of the meeting with Laswell and then we can head out." He gives you a quick smile and you part ways as you head to your room to finish packing.
You decide to wait to change until you get to John's because you didn't want to have to change again so you instead opt to just add a beanie to tame your wild curls.
You swing your duffle bag over your good shoulder as you hear a knock at your door.
"Ready?"
You nod with a smile and follow him out to the truck. It's still pouring out so you have to make a run for the truck. Once inside you repeat your routine from earlier and curl up against the console.
As you get closer to his house he turns the radio down, "Have any idea what you want for dinner while we are out?"
"I've really been craving Chinese since we got back,"
"I know a great place. We'll get it to go and bring it home."
"Sounds like a plan. Can we please watch A River Runs Through It? I've been thinking about it all day," you say sheepishly. You've seen the movie at least a 1000 times, but it's easily your favourite movie because it reminds you of home.
"Yes we can." he laughs softly.
It didn't take long to order your food and head back to John's place. When you reach it you smile seeing the quaint little cottage that sat hidden away by the tall hedge fence and trees.
You have stayed here before many times, but never just you. You and Gaz usually stayed over after long missions, and others had been a couple of times. The whole 141 team had stayed after celebrating a little too much one night. There was only one guest room and the couch pulled into a bed, but everyone wanted the bed in the guest room. At one point all of you were piled in the guest room on the queen size bed which felt a lot smaller at the time. Soap was laid on top of Ghost and Gaz laid sprawled out over you and Ghost like a starfish. How you all managed to get a decent amount of sleep was beyond you.
"I'll get our bags and you get the food." The rain had picked up and you could barely see in front of you as you ran for the door behind John. Once inside you put the food on the counter and head down the hallway to the guest room to change. You take the beanie off ruffling your curly hair and decide to pull it into a high ponytail. You then change into one of your favourite hoodies and a pair of shorts and head back to the kitchen stopping by the washer to throw in your clothes and hang John's jacket up to dry.
"So when was the last time you were able to watch this movie?" He chuckles handing you your food as both head to the den.
"When I made y'all watch it actually. So about a year or two?" You sit on the couch cross legged eagerly waiting for the movie to start.
While watching the movie you point out little details and talk about how much Missoula had changed since the film came out. John loves watching movies with you because he loves hearing what is going on in your mind. He could tell how much this movie meant to you just by the way you talk about it.
As the ending credits roll you quickly wipe away stray tears that have managed to escape and try to cover them up, "I can take you to some of the spots they filmed at, but there may be quite a few people there this time of year. I know some secret spots too so either way we can enjoy ourselves."
"Wherever you go I'll follow." He gives you that signature smile.
You return it and yawn, "I think I'm going to turn in for the night," you pat his leg and stand up stretching, "I've had a lot of fun today though. Thank you for letting me goof around for a bit. I really needed that."
"Anytime, we all need to let loose sometimes." He gives you a warm smile.
You say your goodnights and head to the kitchen to throw your trash away before heading to bed.
______________________________________________________________
You wake up in a cold sweat panting as you frantically look around the room trying to figure out where you were. You lean back against the headboard and close your eyes to breathe, but all you see are their lifeless bodies. Those who you couldn't save. This last mission had really taken a toll on you as much as you hated to admit it. You understood you couldn't save everyone, but that didn't make it any easier when it happened. You wipe your hand over your face trying to hold back the tears and slide out of bed. You notice your shoulder is sticky and you touch it seeing your finger turn red.
"Oh fuckin' hell of course." You mumble to yourself sniffling as the tears are threatening to spill over. You walk over to your bag to grab your med kit and head to the bathroom. You shut the door and hop on the sink after turning on the light. A few of your stitches had broken and they needed to be fixed. You've had to do this many times, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt like hell. You bite the inside of your lip concentrating on the stitching instead of the pain. You hit a particularly sensitive area that made you flinch and hit your head on the medicine cabinet making you exclaim a rather loud,"fuck."
You hear footsteps as you're finishing up the last couple of stitches and a knock at the door, "You okay in there?"
"Yeah I'm fine," Your voice was shaky and not very convincing. You finish off and go to bite the thread as the door opens.
You freeze. Your teeth are still on the thread. You must look ridiculous right now perched up on the sink like this, eyes bloodshot, hair in disarray.
"Wren, what the hell are you doing?" He very rarely used your real name, but when he did it usually meant he was concerned.
You laugh nervously and then bite the thread, "My stitches broke and I needed to fix them."
"What happened?" He reaches out to you but you flinch away. That's all he needs, to know exactly what happened, "You saw them again didn't you?" He spoke so softly as if any loud noises would scare you away. You just nod and the tears start falling as you start to shake. He gently wraps his arms around you and you cling to his shirt sobbing. It breaks John's heart seeing you like this. He wants nothing more than to take away all your nightmares and fears.
"Shh it's alright love, you're ok." He strokes your hair placing a soft kiss on the top of your head.
You don't know how long you stay like that, but you're finally able to breathe again, "Thank you," Your voice barely audible as you pull back to look at him, "I'm sorry about your shirt by the way." You are eye level with him, something you're not used to.
"It's perfectly fine," he whispers chuckling, "Do you want to try to get some sleep?"
You nod and he helps you down. You feel so small behind him, his tall frame towering over you shielding you from anything that would come your way. You head back to your room with John and crawl up on the bed sitting up against the headboard. You didn't want to go to sleep just yet. You're too afraid of what you'll see.
John sits down on the edge of the bed and gently grabs your hand pulling you from your thoughts, "Do you want to talk about it?"
You shake your head, "There's not really much to talk about. It's the same thing over and over again. I'm just standing there watching..." you trail off not wanting to continue.
"But you didn't just stand there when it actually happened did you?" He takes your face into his hands. They're warm and rough, but gentle at the same time, "No, you fought and gave everything you had to try and save them. It's not your fault. Nobody blames you for what happened."
You lean into his touch and close your eyes as a few tears escape, "Thank you John. That means a lot coming from you."
He leans forward and places a soft kiss on your forehead, "I don't like seeing you so beside yourself like this. You know you can come to me if you ever need someone to listen."
"I know. I appreciate you saying that." You give him a small smile.
He stands up, but you instinctively grab his arm to stop him.
"Please don't go," you responded quietly.
He looks at you with soft eyes, "I'm just going to turn the lamp off." His voice was so soft it made you feel safe and at ease.
You let him go and he walks over to turn off the lamp and then climbs on the other side of the bed. You scoot over to him and lay your head on his chest. He wraps his arm around you as you feel yourself drifting off to sleep to the sweet sound of his heart beat.
'We're just friends right?' You both think to yourselves.
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Out Of Time ~ 126
MASTERLIST
< previous chapter
Word Count: 2,525ish
Summary: Y/N sees her men after saying goodbye to Coulson and the team. Infinity War starts.
Tony’s apartment was dark and quiet, which was extremely unusual for any of Tony’s places of living.
“Tony?” Y/N called, her body was exhausted. She was trying to hold herself together from also saying goodbye to part of her family. “Tony?”
“The Boss is currently away on a business trip, Agent Rogers,” FRIDAY responded. “I will inform him that you are here.”
“Thanks… Uh, FRIDAY?”
“Yes?”
“I’m… I…”
“If I could step in, it seems like your body is exhausted, running on its last amounts of fuel. May I suggest that you rest? I will order food and work with Mr. Stark to get him here as fast as possible.”
“Okay… I’ll be in Tony’s room.”
~~~
“Y/N?” Tony called.
When FRIDAY had told him that Y/N was back, Tony quickly ended the meeting he was in and flew home. He had been kept up to date on the SHIELD issues, since they were being broadcast everywhere. The man hunt was on Y/N like nothing it had before. He was concerned and so very worried, Tony was barely making it through the meeting.
“Y/N? Are you there?” He tried again, exiting his suit and searching his apartment.
“Boss,” FRIDAY responded. “She is resting in your room. She came back with extreme exhaustion. I’ve sent her to be and ordered food.”
“Thanks, FRI,” Tony sighed, relieved.
He quickly, but quietly, made his way up to his room. Opening the door, the light from the hallway illuminated a very asleep Y/N, buried in the covers. He walked over, tucking her into the covers more before pressing a kiss to her forehead.
“Tony?” She rasped, eyes half opening.
“Go back to sleep,” he urged, brushing his fingers over her cheek. “I’ll let you know when the food’s here.”
She nodded, quickly falling back to sleep. Tony watched her lovingly before changing into something comfier. He was in the living room, waiting for the food, when the elevator dinged. Quickly on guard, Tony stood up defensively. He relaxed slightly when he noticed Peter waltzing in, bags of food.
“Hey, Mr. Stark!” Peter greeted excitedly.
“Hey, kid,” Tony responded. “What ya got there?”
“Oh, FRIDAY told me that you needed me to run and get some food. Even told me where to go and what to go.”
“FRIDAY, huh?” He looked up at the ceiling with a little shake of his head. “We’re going to have a conversation later.”
“Am I intruding on something?”
“No, kid,” Tony sighed. “It’s about time I let you in on a little secret.”
“A secret? What secret?”
“How about you go and get everything set up for three in the kitchen and I’ll be right back?”
“For three? Okay, Mr. Stark!”
The kid rushed away to the kitchen. Tony headed back to the bed room. He had the urge to leave Y/N sleeping, as she very well needed it, obviously. But she needed to eat as well. He walked over and gently sat next to her.
“Y/N,” he called softly. “Time to wake up.”
“Hmm?” She hummed, stirring from her slumber.
“Food’s here. And, there’s someone I want you to meet.”
“Meet?” Y/N was more awake now. “Tony, you know I can’t—“
“They won’t say anything to anyone. I promise.” He grabbed one of her hands and brought it up to his lips for a kiss. “Please?”
“Okay, Tony,” she nodded. Her stomach growled as she threw the covers off of her.
Tony chuckled. “You hungry?”
“A little.” She put her hands out. “A little help.”
Tony smiled and nodded before grabbing her hands. He carefully guided Y/N so that she was standing. Keeping hold of one of Y/N’s hands, Tony began to lead them out of the bedroom. Suddenly, Y/N tripped over her own tired feet.
“Woah, there, honey,” Tony said, steadying her. “When was the last time you ate?”
“Uh… honestly, I don’t remember,” Y/N responded. “It was… I thought happened.”
“And you better plan on telling me all about it after dinner.”
“Yes, Tones.”
Tony wrapped an arm around Y/N’s waist to keep her more steady as they made their way to the kitchen. When they arrived, Y/N saw a teenager, one from the pictures on the wall. He was setting up dinner.
“Mr. Parker,” Tony called, the boy’s head snapped to look at his mentor. The boy was clearly surprised to see who was standing beside Tony. “I’d like you to meet Y/N. Y/N, this is Peter Parker. Or, Spider-Man.”
“Hello, Mr. Parker,” Y/N greeted holding her hand out for the young hero to shake. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
Peter nervously shook Y/N’s hand. “You’re…” He swallowed. “Y-you’re Lady America. I… I fought your brother in Germany.”
“You did, huh?” Y/N gave Tony a look. Tony looked away, not willing to meet her eye.
“Yeah! I even stole his shield from him.”
“Well, that sounds like an interesting story. I’d love to hear it sometime.”
“Okay!” / “Let’s not.”
“Miss Rogers, I promise I won’t tell anyone about seeing you,” Peter continued as they sat at the table.
“Thank you, Peter,” Y/N replied. “It means a lot.”
“How was school today, kid?” Tony asked, taking Y/N’s plate and dishing food onto it. “And patrol? Save any cats?”
“School was school. I spent most of science reworking my webbing. And I didn’t save any cats today, Mr. Stark. Just some old ladies crossing the street.”
Y/N honestly enjoyed the dinner with Tony and Peter. It was a sense of normalcy that had disappeared from her life what seemed like ages ago. After dinner was done, Peter needed to go home to get Aunt May. He awkwardly said goodbye before disappearing into the elevator. Y/N leaned back into Tony once Peter was gone. Tony pressed a kiss to the side of her head.
“Coulson’s dying,” Y/N whispered.
“What?” Tony quickly moved so that he was facing Y/N. “How?”
“I don’t know. But, I said goodbye to him and the team. Only final time.”
Tony pulled her in for a hug. “I’m sorry you had to do that,” he said softly. “I know how much they meant to you.”
“He was there when I woke up… he was my first friend.”
“Do the others know? Does Daisy know?”
“No. And I wasn’t meant to find out.”
Tony looked down at Y/N. “What do you need me to do?”
“Hold me.”
So that’s what he did, all night long.
~~~
To say Bucky was anxious would be an understatement. Y/N had been gone for about a week, without a word from her. Shuri had tried to cheer him up, but it was only met with grumpiness. He was beginning to worry that something had happened to her. After that worry crept it, Bucky noticed that T’Challa and the others were keeping something from him.
“What do you know?” Bucky asked, marching into the throne room where T’Challa and his counselors were.
“Leave us,” T’Challa requested, and the others quickly left. “This is about Y/N.”
“What do you know?”
“I will show you.”
T’Challa showed Bucky the news footage of Talbot’s press conference and him getting shot in the head by Daisy, only for Y/N to appear moments later.
“The government will stop at nothing to throw her in Raft,” T’Challa stated. “I have—“
“They won’t waste their time with Raft,” Y/N’s voice came from behind. The men spun around to see her standing there. “They’ve already made it clear that they will kill me on sight.”
After spending time with Tony, Y/N knew she needed to go back to Wakanda to see Bucky. She willingly let Tony make her breakfast before fighting him to let her leave. Luckily, she won.
“But I’m fine,” Y/N continued. “Healed it myself.” Bucky began marching towards her, clearly angry. “What? I’m okay, I pro—“
She was quickly cut off by his lips smashing onto hers. With his only arm, he pulled her into him, keeping her tightly against his chest. Y/N could feel all the worry and frustration that was being poured into the kiss.
“Don’t ever do that again,” Bucky growled against her lips.
“I’m sorry,” she replied softly. “I really had no choice.”
T’Challa cleared his throat, reminding the two that they were not alone. “I’m glad that you are alright, Y/N,” T’Challa said with a slight smile. “I’m afraid Barnes here was about to burn the whole country down to search for you.”
“The whole country, huh?” She looked at Bucky, teasingly. “Wow.”
“The whole country, no,” Bucky defended. “The whole world, that’s probably about right.”
“Cause that would solve the problem.”
“Anything to get me to you, doll.” He gave you a softer kiss. “Are you alright?”
“I’m fine. And I’m safe.”
~~~
The next year went by in this weird, fast-slow sort of way. Both Tony and Bucky were as understanding as they could be with the situation Y/N was putting them in. But as time went on, the more frustrated and jealous both men became. Valentine’s Day was honestly the least problematic of any of the holidays. And that was saying something.
Alone, Y/N worked to gain more control and confidence with her abilities. She needed to be ready for whatever was coming. At the start of 2018, the Stones slowly began haunting her dreams, concerning both men greatly. Sleeping was becoming a luxury. The Stones showed to her their powers and the vision Wanda showed her three years previous. They kept telling her to prepare, but not exactly what to prepare for.
The mounting stress of choosing between the men she loved and the oncoming battle that laid ahead, was enough to make anyone go crazy. But Y/N tried her best to keep an even killed head on her shoulders. Both her men could see that this was all weighing on her, but they did their best (somedays) to take a weight off of her.
Y/N also began to grow more angry at Steve. Though she missed him greatly. She was so mad at him. Mad at him for not reaching out or appearing to not care. She was mad at him for not telling her about Howard’s death and for not being willing to see outside his stubborn ass. For that being there when she lost AJ. But Y/N also missed him terribly. Steve was her twin after all. She would always love him.
It was now currently April and Y/N was up late after having visions of the Reality and Power Stones. And a purple giant. She was alone in her Wakandan bedroom, staring at her hands nervously. She had woken up deciding that she couldn’t wait any longer to choose. A choice needed to be made before what ever was haunting her came. In all honesty, Y/N had known for months, who’d she choose. She was just lying to herself.
With a deep breath, Y/N looked over at her side table. There were two clocks on the table, one with New York’s time and one with Bucky’s. It was almost time for her morning run with Tony.
“I guess it’s time to make the choice official,” she whispered to herself. “Someone help me.”
~~~
Tony was already waiting at the Compound for Y/N. He had bought the property on the other side of the lake months back so that their dates could be outside more. He put in a dirt path so that they could run in the mornings too. Tony was leaning against a tree, waiting for Y/N, with his fingers running over his knew (detachable) arc reactor. Ever since Y/N began to struggle to sleep at night, he knew he needed to do something to protect them. To protect her. The new arc reactor didn’t get placed without a fight. But Y/N eventually gave in.
“You ready to lose again, tin man?” Y/N teased, appearing through a portal beside him.
“I never mind losing,” Tony smirked. “The view’s great.”
“Perv!”
Y/N playfully swatted him. Tony grabbed her hands and pulled her into him for a kiss. Something was off about it.
“You okay?” He asked, pulling away.
“Yeah,” she responded, unconvincing. “Just ready for a run.”
She pecked his lips once more before sprinting off. He quickly followed. They ran in silence for a while before Tony started talking, but it wasn’t all making sense to Y/N.
“Slow down, slow down,” Tony requested. “I’m totally not kidding.”
“You’re totally rambling,” Y/N laughed, slowing down to a walking speed.
“No, I’m not.”
“Lost me.”
“Look, you know how you're having a dream, and in the dream you gotta pee?”
“Yeah,” Y/N nodded.
“Okay, and then you're like, 'Oh my god, there's no bathroom, what am I gonna do?', 'Oh! Someone's watching,' ''m gonna go in my pants.’”
“Right. And then you wake up, and in real life you actually have to pee.”
“Yes.”
“Yeah. Everybody has that.”
“Right! That's the point I'm trying to make. Apropos of that, last night, I dreamt, we had a kid.” Y/N stopped turning to face Tony. “So real. We named him after an eccentric uncle. Uh, what was his name?”
“Right… Tony, I think—“
“Morgan! Morgan.” He snapped his fingers.
“So you woke up, and thought that we were…”
“Expecting.”
“Really?”
“Yes?”
“No,” Y/N shook her head. “We haven’t even had sex in a year. How could that me possible?”
“I had a dream about it. It was so real.”
“I’m sure it was, Tony. But I haven’t even—“
“I know, I know. You haven’t chosen yet. But just think about it, will ya? My dream can’t be far off.”
Y/N sighed and untied the jacket sleeves around Tony’s neck. “Also, if you wanted to have a kid, you wouldn’t have done that.” She tapped the new reactor.
“I'm glad you brought this up, 'cause it's nothing. It's just a housing unit for nano particles.”
“It's not helping your case, OK?”
“No, no, it's an attachment, it's not a—“
“You don’t need that.”
“I know. I had the surgery. I'm just trying to protect us. The future uses, and that's it. Just in case there's a monster in the closet, instead of, you know…”
“Shirts?"
“You know me so well. You finish all my sentences.”
“You should have shirts in your closet.”
“I should have more of your shirts in my closet.”
“Tony—“
“I know, getting ahead of myself again. You know what there should be no more surprises. Let’s have a nice dinner tonight and we should have no more surprises. I should promise you.”
“Actually, Tony, I really need to talk to you about something. I made—“
“Tony Stark,” a man with a red cloak appeared a few feet away. There was an orange portal behind him. “Y/N Rogers, I’m Doctor Stephen Strange. And I need you both to come with me.”
next chapter >
I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS AND SUCH!!! FEEL FREE TO SEND IN AN ASK OR DM, OR YOU CAN REBLOG OR COMMENT. THANKS FOR READING!
NOTES: from now on the taglist when be added by a reblog. I will reblog it using my second account, @just-dreaming-marvel-2. Just so that my main page doesn’t get too cluttered.
If you want to be added to the tag list, please dm me or send in an ask.
#tony stark x reader#bucky barnes x reader#the avengers x reader#avengers x reader#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#marvel imagines#tony stark imagine#bucky barnes imagine#iron man x reader#winter soldier x reader#avengers imagine#Avengers infinity war#infinity war#tony stark#Bucky Barnes
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Terrible to Meet You - A Harry Styles One Shot - Act 2, Let not the time discern
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Harry wants to get out of the house. Alex wants to get home.
Alex meets Harry at at crossroads. Harry meets Alex on a one way street.
A coffee shop OU fic feat. lattes, lamingtons & that Great Unfathomable Feeling.
Story Page Here My Masterlist Here
Read Act 1, If at first we meet Here
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Two of Us: 'This universe ain't big enough to keep us apart'
&&&
Harry went back to the cafe the next day. (And, after that, every day for a medium while)
There was something about it. Something about the tiny cafe he must have walked past a hundred times before but never took much notice of. Perhaps it was the way he felt the rest of the day after having been there. Or the fact the coffee was fucking good. But also maybe it was her—kind eyes, a foreign accent and a quick wit. It would take Harry's mind and body marginally longer than his heart to recognise what pulled him there.
Alex was surprised when he returned. Part of her was relieved, too. The other part of her was busy extracting the dagger of guilt that shot through her chest. Seeing Harry reminded her that she forgot to tell her flatmates the juicy The Daily Dose gossip about Harry Styles. And Harry walking up to the window a little before 8 am with a calm but reassuring smile on his face made something in her still, and Alex realised he wasn't gossip at all.
"Hi," he greeted her pleasantly, seemingly thinking nothing of the way his hand was tucked into the top of his running shorts to extract his phone for payment. (Alex's heart did a lusty little backflip) She saw a slither of a toned tummy and the way the elastic of the shorts folded over itself, "I'm back for more," he said.
More coffee, and more of whatever else it was packaged into the takeaway cups with it. Alex and Paul were Harry's first human interaction after returning from LA. And, where 24 hours prior his aching need had been to see literally anybody, it was now just a need to see more of this somebody. A person whose name he didn't know yet and who Harry had absolutely no reason to feel connected to at all. Knitted hearts aren't visible to the human eye, not when it isn't Looking.
He did though. Although the way she was now watching him with a completely blank expression on her face and a far off look in her eyes made Harry's confidence falter. He repeated what he'd already said over in his head looking for where he might've gone wrong. Harry came up blank. Was she completely freaked out by him already?
Paul rescued her from what Alex was sure was turning into a flushed moment for her. Did Harry really not realise what he'd said with his fingers beyond the elastic of his shorts? Paul's head appeared over her shoulder as a frown started to appear on Harry's face, "Careful Harry, she's a grump today."
Nobody blinked an eye at Paul using Harry's name before it was technically given to them.
"I am not," Alex insisted too quickly, too forcefully. Her elbow launched backwards, trying to catch Paul's gut. She really was a grump. But last night's wine was still causing her head to thump and her throat to ache. Tears and a bottle of red worked well in the moment but weren't as comforting the morning after.
Paul's eyebrows rose in Harry's direction, and he waved a hand out in front of him, expertly weaving away from her attack even in the tiny space, "See?"
"Ah," Harry nodded awkwardly and briefly looked at his feet.
"Doesn't like it when I start talking about universe stuff," Paul explained loudly, despite nobody asking for him to. "Very spiritually pragmatic, the Australians."
"Didn't know that," Harry added, expression turning to one of interest. He wasn't involved in this part of the conversation the previous day.
"Long black?" Alex asked because yes she remembered his order, and she had the defence of it having been less than 24 hours since she last made Harry's coffee in case anyone started raising eyebrows for another reason.
"Uh, yeah," Harry fumbled over how quickly the exchange turned to business, "Thank you."
She got to work but felt Harry's eyes on her as her hands ran on autopilot, stepping through the process. The click click of the bean hopper, the churn of the grinder, packing the head … Alex put the machine on to run and internally cursed Paul, who took himself into the back room, mumbling something about them running low on serviettes. A blatant lie.
Now, when she turned back to Harry, she tried to look calm and serene, like him. But she was already covered in coffee grind and couldn't be sure there wasn't a smudge of it across her face. Paul never told her when there was. Harry's heart was waving to hers widely.
"So … You're definitely not in a bad mood then?" Harry had an expression on his face that told Alex he was testing the waters, but the teasing note was there in just the right amount.
"I'm hungover, which is completely different," she provided.
His smile turned into a grimace, "Oh yeah, completely … Nothing worse … Self-inflicted misery."
Alex tried not to let Harry's awkwardness affect her and in doing so fell into an old pastime of hers; filing the silence with mindless chatter, "Exactly. And then if you add in some idiot going on about the universe and it's wonderful, eternal plans for my existence … I could just kill a man, you know?"
Paul, Paul is the man I could kill, she thought.
He didn't know, but Harry nodded obediently anyway, "You need carbs and coffee, not the cosmos."
"Thank you," Alex gave Harry a look that told him she thought it was obvious the two of them were right, "I mean, the downright gall of that man, trying to put the universe on me this year of all years. Absolutely bloody insane."
Harry tried to hide the instant smile that came to his face hearing her accent navigate absolutely bloody insane. "I'm Harry … By the way … Feel like we're at names."
"Alexandra. But it's Alex." She added quickly, ignoring the lovely, melodic chuckle that came from Harry, "Do you really think that this year, with a global pandemic, anyone can claim that the universe is conspiring for their specific good? Like, 'Sorry everyone about the pandemic, this is really about my destiny, so you're all just going to have to hang tight while that all falls into place!' This is a terrible year. The universe isn't setting up shit."
"Well, it's terrible to meet you, Alex," Harry grinned, stealing her word. She really was in a grump, and he loved it. But if there was one thing Harry knew how to do, it was charm and disarm. He had a feeling nothing would look as lovely as Alex with a blush he'd put there.
Alex paused where she was about to put the lid on his coffee. She felt her cheeks heat as the last few moments played over in her head—her ranting, Harry's introduction, threatening to murder a man—and then she took in the way he was watching her. A little pink-cheeked himself, amused but not appalled, a waiting look of anticipation on his face for what might come out of her big mouth next.
"I think I might still be a little drunk," she excused meekly. Despite herself, Alex thought she might have a little crush.
"You're handling it well," Harry provided kindly, taking the coffee from where Alex put it down in front of him. He waved his phone over the payment portal, waiting for the beep before locking the screen and going back to looking at her, "Drinking for any particular reason?"
"Oh," Alex's eyes widened, "I—
—"Sorry, that was intrusive of me."
"No, it's okay," she continued quietly, not seeing the way her softening had Harry frowning in concentration to tune into what she was about to say, "I've been trying to get home—back to Australia—for a while now. Flights keep getting cancelled or, on Saturday, I was bumped from one at Heathrow…. So we're back to square one."
Dread filled Harry instantly. He could see how upset Alex was, the heartache in her voice—the homesickness—and he hated this look on her, the opposite to the one he'd just daydreamed about. If there was one thing Harry knew it was what it was to miss home. There was no cure for it. A dozen ways he could offer to help burst to the tip of his tongue, but he held them back.
"I'm sorry, that's really shit. Have …" he hesitated to ask, "Have they put you on another one?"
She smiled through glassy eyes, "It's complicated, that's not really how flights home are working at the moment … But it's alright! I'm fine. I'll get there eventually. I got the refund for the first one, back in April, last week and Paul's let me come back to work here three times now so … This can't last forever, right?"
Harry didn't have an answer for that, he was in no hurry to return to his house as he took a sip of his coffee, "How long has it been since you were home?"
"I went back for a visit a little over two years ago," Alex flipped a button on the espresso machine in front of her, to distract herself from the subject but also the way Harry was watching her. If only she could see the way the hearts were watching each other. She started rinsing out her coffee mug under the stream of boiling water, "My sister came over for Christmas last year, though."
"I just got back from America," Harry provided without knowing where the urge to comfort this stranger was coming from, "I was only gone a few months, and it was a little hard to get back, it felt dreadful, so I can't imagine what it's like for you. That's a long time to be so far from home, especially now."
While he spoke, Alex started making herself a latte, for something to do in the moment and for something to hold onto if Harry stayed at the window.
"How long have you been in London?" He asked. How long have you been just around the corner? Harry thought.
When she looked over at him, Harry felt like she was seeing through him. There was something about her soft, brown eyes and the way they exuded kindness that had him buoyant with giddiness at the same time as feeling incredibly self-conscious.
"Four years now," Alex told him, "Was supposed to be just a 12-month adventure."
"Your family must miss you then."
She shrugged, "I think they're used to it now. Life moves on without you, which is strange at first. Tough to get used to, that the people who own you suddenly have lives you only know about from catch-ups and Instagram posts."
Harry didn't know how to tell her that he knew exactly what she meant. He'd been struggling with that very notion for years now. Home never left like the same home he remembered, and wherever he found himself living—LA or the road—never quite felt right either.
"I've loved it though," Alex added, "Wouldn't have stayed if I didn't. This year though … I just want to be home, London's… Lost something."
Harry watched her shake herself out of the sad moment, her face brightened, and he barely registered the way Alex said in a genuinely upbeat fashion that she'd just have to wait for her time. He smiled along with the rising of her cheeks and felt like he saw a transition between two feelings that was entirely healthy and okay. She wasn't pretending. Her graciousness and patience with life were astounding, despite the fact he'd equally seen her sadness as being genuine as well. The balance there was enlightening.
"Need to make the most of the bonus time you've been given here then," he tried hesitantly. The hearts nodded at each other, gleefully.
That had been the right thing to say, the smile on Alex's face amplified in agreement, "Exactly.”
3AM 'She's got a little bit of something' &&&
Alex was sitting on an upturned milk crate as Harry rounded the corner.
His step faltered but only because she was looking right at him as if expecting him to arrive. He smiled under his mask and tugged it down while he was still a reasonable distance away. Alex smiling at him, holy hell did that taste—the flavour of her spirit—feel good in Harry's chest. Each day for nearly a month he'd felt the same way every time he saw her.
Alex received a text message from Harry just after 7 am that morning. Unlike the ones he sent every other day telling her he was on his way (an old fashioned tip from his sister, to demonstrate to Alex that Harry was thinking of her) that morning Harry told her he wouldn't see her until the afternoon. All day, she waited. Her heart tapped its foot impatiently in her chest, a nervous ticking that made Alex clumsy and disappointed when every new customer wasn't him.
"Hello," Harry grinned back at her, because that was all he could do, really. In her presence happiness exploded out of him and charged his whole body faster than caffeine ever could. His shoe scuffed the concrete path again as he looked at the closed cafe behind her, "Did I miss something?"
Harry stopped a safe distance from her, not sure how this new level of interaction would go. He'd never seen her whole body all at once, part of her was always obscured by the cafe window. Alex in the flesh—in the whole—was like the first taste of chilli on his tongue, invigorating in a way that stole the breath from his lungs.
"We close at three every day," she stayed seated but pushed another crate towards him with her foot. There were brown smudges of coffee grind all up and down her shins, and he guessed the black jeans she wore to work were strategic.
Harry squinted the sign on the window by the door, he was always occupied by her and didn't need arbitrary activities like reading signs to keep him entertained waiting for his coffee, "Really?"
"You usually come in the morning," Alex said pleasantly, waiting for him to sit down opposite her, "Here."
Harry was overwhelmed, he really was, by the sight of a white takeaway cup in her hand, and he reached for it carefully, "What's this—Alex."
"Can't have you missing your coffee … Made it right before closing, had to put the tiniest drop of milk in there otherwise it would shit itself and taste horrendous," she laughed at his wrinkled nose at the mention of milk, he sniffed the lid just to tease her or to get her to roll her eyes at him blithely. It worked, "It won't kill you, promise."
"Says someone whose intestines know how to handle lactose without making you shit yourself," he borrowed her phrase. Sounded better when Alex said it, with the wideness and the breadth of her accent.
Alex tilted her head back and laughed. Really laughed and Harry didn't have it in him to be embarrassed or scold himself for how he just spoke about his bowels in front of her, because the sound is marvellous and so Alex. It's unapologetic and genuine and a touch off-beat, which he loves.
"Holy shit," she let out a long, shaking breath afterwards, holding a palm to her rib as if in pain. She was pretending not to notice how Harry stared at her while she was laughing as if extremely happy with himself. "You wear white bottoms far too often for that to be a daily worry for you."
"Oh, it's a worry," Harry insisted, mainly to keep the joke going. He felt like his face was about to crack in half, "I can't have people spiking my coffees without my knowledge," Harry took a sip but then pointed his finger at her playfully, "I'm going to have to keep an eye on you."
As if he wasn't already.
"Busy day?" Alex asks, watching Harry take a hearty sip of the coffee she made him.
"Yeah, I um … I had some, ah, work stuff."
"Oh?" Alex crossed one leg over the other and looked at Harry with (mock) interest, "What do you do for work?"
Harry's eyes bulged involuntarily, and his mind went completely blank. Did she actually not know?
Alex only let the horror play on his face for a few seconds, "I'm kidding! I'm kidding. Jesus, Harry, sorry. I was just having a go."
"You're an excellent actress, as it turns out," he swallowed down the moment of panic. It only ever happened once before, years before, that a girl he'd been interested in hadn't known who Harry was beforehand. It hadn't ended up going down well.
Alex asks Harry about the book recommendation she sent him the week before, whether he'd started reading it yet.
Harry held up a finger at her, "I've been meaning to talk to you about that," he said, "But I haven't had lunch … I'd promised myself one of Paul's ham and cheese croissants."
"Well, you're shit out of luck, unfortunately," Alex told him, "He takes the keys with him, I can't break in and make you one. But the cafe on the high street around the corner stays open until five. You could try there?"
Harry felt like he was about to defecate himself, but it wasn't from the lactose, "Will you join me?"
Alex's eyes brightening instantly, but Harry didn't miss the way her cheeks reddened, "Sure. Of course."
"Great!" Harry coughed down his too-enthusiastic response then worried—as everyone did in 2020—that his physical reaction to her saying yes, the cough, would be interpreted as a symptom of something else entirely. He checks the time on his Apple Watch, "Should we go then?"
They walk in step away from The Daily Dose, and away from the previous pattern of their friendship. It strikes them both that this is the first time (both trip over 'first' in their minds as having the possibility to suggest it happening more often but their hearts have known all along, of course) they were out in the world together, the first time they were more than barista and customer.
Harry's hand touched Alex's forearm when they got to the cafe's door as he held it open and encouraged her to go inside. They ordered takeaway, Harry got a croissant (he was still working on the coffee Alex made him) while Alex ordered a tea. They then walked back a little way to where there was a small park with vacant seats Harry noticed on the way past.
"So, the book …" Alex asked him, the lid of her tea is off to let the heat escape. She’d crossed her legs and angled her hips towards him on the bench seat. Harry faced forward, heart hammering as he tried to remember how to use his voice.
Harry struggled to look dignified while biting into his too-hot croissant, the cheese burnt his lip, but he tried to hide it, "Oh, yeah, well, I haven't started it."
"I thought you said you wanted to speak to me about it!" She laughed.
"A ploy," Harry admitted sheepishly, "Was trying to figure out how to ask you to come with me."
In her head, Alex squealed. Her heart held two thumbs up at Harry's.
"How's the coffee," she asked, eyeing the cup in his hand.
Harry grins, knowing his next line is a winner, "Best in London, easily."
+++
GIve me all your best Alex & Harry theories Act 3, Hearts beat not fail - coming soon!
+++
Tag list: @afterhoursharry @beautifuleclipses @bumbershots @coffee-doodle-doo @decadentdonkeyflowerzonk @elemayox @ficsthatmakemeswoon @finelinesupremacy @greatestview @hatnightin2008 @ifiwereaboy2323 @just-damn-bored @kakaym @lifeandsomethingelse @luminescencefics @micurq27 @miorni @monpetitchouchou16 @morethanamelodyy @piawhat @rubytersteege @stepping-into-the-light @steppingonoranges @stylesfics-xx @stylishmuser @toalltheboyswhowastedmytime @ursamajor603 @veryplatoniccircunstances @whatevarandomlygoes Sign up for the tag list here
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Zeromaster Hiatus Update
First off, thank you all for the support this year so far, especially during my Live2D Debut! I really appreciate the feedback and response to it all. I wish I could respond to each individual message but there is never enough time in the day to do so, so I want to take this opportunity to thank each and every person who has been helping & supporting me, words cannot describe what ya’ll mean to me.
Now then, let’s hop right into this! As many of you know, shortly after my Debut I announced that I will be taking a short hiatus as I am in the process of moving from an apartment into a house. This was something my roommates and I were offered in April but we were unsure of it. After seeing the place we had decided the Wednesday before the debut stream, that we were going to accept the offer. The earliest we could move in was April 20th (heehee funny day) which I was planning to spend that day moving over what I could fit in my car as well as do some measurements to run Ethernet in the upstairs bedrooms.
Here’s where things get complicated. Due to an unforeseen personal event that I will not be discussing further, we are unable to get into the new house until further notice. Now this is not a big deal since we still have our apartment till June 1st as our last month’s covers May’s rent, however we had planned to move in before The start of May as we are expecting a visitor who is staying with us for a few weeks and we didn’t want to be moving in that time.
On top of all that, I am the best man at my brother’s wedding and it is on the first weekend of June with the bachelor party the weekend before. Not to mention, I had been frantically organizing, as I was planning to move most of my stuff this weekend, however that isn’t happening now cuz we can’t get into the house yet.
All of this compiled with the fact that I had been pulling a lot of long nights with less sleep up until the day before my debut getting things ready for it…and I STILL didn’t have everything I wanted ready for the debut so I was panicking and stressing about everything. Once my debut was over, I had decided, I am tired, I am moving soon, I need a break, so I announced the hiatus, only for things to get even more stressful right after that.
I’ve had some time to reflect and I realize that streaming and content creation were a stress reliever for me and by basically putting it on hold I was not only piling my stress on, but I was tired, I was working too hard and most of all I was anxious about this move, the wedding and many other things. So after discussing it with my partners I came to a conclusion, I love streaming, but I have been stretching myself too thin.
This is all something I knew for a while. I went so hard at it that I was spending less time with my friends. Everything had to be content, even hanging out with my friends and I hated that I was getting that way. It really hit home when my roommate pointed out that we hung out more before we lived together then in the year plus we had been roommates. TBF, it was because I was no longer shackled to my household I grew up in, I could make my own schedule so long as it does not interfere with my day job or sleeping, it was so freeing. Not to mention, my first year living on my own was really stressful and bad on my mental health where doing the simplest of adult stuff scared me and would make my anxiety run rampant making me worse and worse.
So I absorbed myself in content, because it made me happy and kept me away from all the things that stressed me out, but with that I was slacking on a lot of my other responsibilities, and I could feel a burnout coming. So I took the hiatus but then suddenly without streaming, I started getting anxious as I had no stress relief outside watching movies/tv, playing games or hanging out with my partners.
All this has led me to re-evaluate how I tackle content going forward. I enjoy streaming and content creation, but it shouldn't be the only thing I enjoy. I need to spend proper time with my friends, partners and roommates and not have it always revolve around content. So with all of that I have decided, at least until June to adopt the old #ZeroStreams 2017-2019 Schedule of 2 times a week with sometimes a 3rd. Tuesdays & Thursdays have always been my go to nights so I think that will continue with Saturday being a sometimes wildcard day. With this I'll also be holding off all my planned and pre-planned collabs till further notice, with the exception of collabs with Sky & Kurama as those are low effort and require minimal planning. As for my other content, here's what I'm thinking. #TokuTuesday will still happen every Tuesday night around 11pm or 12am ET. #ZeroPlays will be taking a hiatus until further notice, #PowerPlays episodes have been pre-recorded since December 2021 and will continue to be produced unless otherwise stated, this of course means that there will only be 2 - 3 Let’s Play videos a week until #ZeroPlays returns. #ZeroStreams Highlights are still being worked on and will be released when they are ready, however the weekend clips will be on hold. The Zeromaster Reviews/Video Series will have videos come out when they are finished, there will be no set schedule for them. Anything else I missed will be on hiatus until further notice.
I just wanna end this off by once again thanking everyone who has been helping and supporting me these past few years. All of what I do is impossible to do without the support of those of you who continue to support and watch. As always, monetary support is appreciated but never required and if you would like to support me but can’t afford to do so in that way, sharing and spreading the word is just valued and appreciated. Thank you for reading, I look forward to bringing you even more great content going forward.
Love
~Zero
Ps: Sky is a cutie
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Our Little Secret Part 7
Fandom: The Vampire Diaries / The Originals
Series: Our Little Secret
Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 // Part 5 // Part 6 //
Part 7 // Part 8 // Part 9 // Part 10 // Part 11 // Part 12 // Part 13 // Part 14 // Part 15 (Final)
Pairing: Klaus Mikaelson x Reader
Warning/s: none
Word Count: 1,337
Summary: Y/N Gilbert tried to put Mystic Falls - it’s problems, and her whirlwind romance with Klaus Mikaelson - behind her after she graduated, but all it takes is one unusual phone call to bring her right back to where she started and into the path of her first love as she races to solve the mystery threatening the lives of everyone in her home town.
Tags: @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce // @april-14-blog // @akshi8278 // @keiko0 // @mylovehes // @your-new-mom
“Hello?” You answered, a pause as you waited somewhat impatiently for whoever had called you three times in the middle of the right to reply. The area code up it in Virginia, which, you realised with a feeling of slight dread, could only mean on thing.
“Hello?!” Grumbling and half asleep you were about to hang up when you heard a crackle from the other end, pausing as you listened.
The crackling turned to panting, someone was running, presumably through... leaves? Was that the noise? You weren’t sure, but you were sure that you were tired.
“Who is this?” You asked, turning on your bed side lamp and pushing yourself up into a sitting position, leaning against the head board and rubbing your eyes.
“Help-” A voice came from the other side of the line, making you freeze, not daring to move another inch as you tried to listen to what was going on. “He said you could help-”
“Who is this? Who told you that?” You practically demanded, suddenly wide awake. The voice didn’t sound familiar but they sounded young, female, a teenager maybe?
“My dad- your number- in an emergency-” the connection was awful, and the continuous movement on the other end didn’t help, parts not getting through as you strained your ears to listen to what they had to say.
“Can you tell me who you are?” You asked her. A lot of your friends from Mystic Falls had children now, but the only ones in their teens were Lizzie and Josie Saltzman, but this didn’t sound like them, though it had been a number of years. “Please, I need you to tell me who you are, where you are, and if you’re in danger.”
You were already tearing yourself out of bed at this point, putting the phone on speaker. “Hope, my name’s Hope- Mystic- Salvatore Sch- please-” And with a scream, the line went dead. You stopped where you were standing, breathing shallow, face pale in horror.
A second later, you’d forcefully shaken yourself out of it, there was no time to think. Ignoring the fact that it was 3 am, you threw open your closet, grabbing clothes for now and a suitcase to pack, multitasking getting dressed and packing for a trip.
It had been years since you last set foot in Mystic Falls, moving away for college and only going back for your twin sister Elena’s ‘funeral’, but that didn’t mean you didn’t keep in contact with everyone there, occasionally. Silas, Kai, Lillian Salvatore, the Sirens... Tyler, Enzo and Stefan...
A lot had happened, a lot of pain, a lot of loss, you’d only brought yourself to return to say goodbye to Elena, which thankfully hadn’t been permanent. You’d call her once you got to the airport, explain the phone call you’d received, as much as you could anyway.
Hope. You knew that name. It was the name of Klaus and Hailey’s daughter. If her dad had given her your number in case of emergencies... You didn’t know why he would have done, but nothing in this world meant more to Klaus than his family, especially his daughter you reckoned. So for him to give her your number, he must have put a lot of trust in you, or you were the absolute last resort.
You’d loved Klaus once, not that you’d ever told him that, your romance had been like a fantasy, and fantasies didn’t last, especially when your prince charming was threatening to kill your sister and your friends. No relationship was perfect, but you and Klaus had been doomed to fail from the start.
You were too different, different paths, different obligations... He’d always said that maybe one day, your paths would cross again, that it hadn’t been your time then but maybe it would be one day. Although you’d try to put it behind you, you still wore that shooting star necklace he’d given you, still thought of him when you looked up at the night sky.
You glanced out of your windows now, taking in the twinkling lights about. Hope Mikaelson was in danger, and she’d asked for your help. So your help was what she was going to get, however helpful a human with no special abilities could be anyway.
You were going home.
-
You touched down in Viriginia just as the sun was rising, casting beautiful colours across the sky as you made your way to the taxi Elena had arranged for you.
Elena had answered straight away; nothing screamed urgent like a mid night phone call from your distant, in multiple meanings, sister. You’d explained the situation on your way to your terminal, having booked the flight in the taxi over to the airport. She and Damon had been confused, to say the least, but they knew as much as you did.
They had Klaus’ number, you didn’t so they promised they’d be in touch with him, checking in with Alaric at the school too.
You spent the entire flight and taxi ride thinking it over again and again, replaying what had happened in your mind as you tried to figure out the why, all thoughts clearing from your mind only when you laid eyes on the welcome sign.
Mystic Falls. You were actually here again.
Checking your phone again you saw no new messages, from Elena or anyone else, which was odd. You’d expected someone to call you, anyone, but they hadn’t. They weren’t answering either, a feeling of pure dread filling you as the taxi reached the town square.
It was still early morning, but the lack of people set your nerves on edge.
“Huh, strange,” the taxi driver shivered, quickly taking your money and driving off as soon as you’d grabbed your belongings. You didn’t blame him, even by Mystic Falls standards, something was very wrong here.
Okay, slight change of plan. Your planned first stop had been the School, but now it was the weapons cache Alaric had at the Mystic Grill.
You moved quickly and carefully, on high alert just like Ric had taught you, an iron grip on your suitcase as you headed around the back of the building.
It didn’t take you long to grab a supply of weapons, slipping a knife into each boot, a gun and stake in your belt and a crossbow on your back as you wished you didn’t have a suitcase to slow you down. You’d have to stash it here for now, just until you figured out what was going on.
Grabbing only the bare essentials out of it and shoving them into a more portable bag, you made it back around the building just in time to catch sight of something out the corner of your eye.
Pausing and slowly turning you looked into the window of the Grill, catching sight of people at the tables. You only had time to feel relieved for a split second before fear set in, looking at the way they were slumped over in their seats, some with their faces in their food, some on the floor, trays scattered around like they’d been dropped. They looked like they were asleep... or... dead.
You felt your heart rate pick up as you swallowed, hard, not wanting to be anywhere near here when whatever did that came back.
A shadow passing in front of you alerted you of someone or something behind you, flipping your crossbow back around from it’s position on your back and into your hands in seconds as you whirled around. You could take the girl out of Mystic Falls, but apparently you couldn’t take the Mystic Falls out of the girl.
Your breath caught in your throat as you registered who was standing before you, that face, that smirk... he hadn’t changed a bit. “Klaus,” you gasped, lowering your weapon as you took him in.
“Hello love,” he grinned, clearly glad to see you although his eyes revealed his worry, “now, what the blood hell is going on here?”
#klaus mikaelson#the vampire diaries#the originals#legacies#klaus mikaelson x reader#klaus mikaelson imagine#the vampire diaries imagine#the originals imagine#legacies imagine#klaus mikaelson imagines#the vampire diaries imagines#the originals imagines#legacies imagines#our little secret
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here's my design for goty 2022 (in an au where copyright isn't an issue)
FACTS
name: nia mahdi
age: 11
ethnicity: persian
religion: muslim
family: nia is an only child. she was born in charlottesville, va, after parents immigrated there from iran.
notes: nia is autistic and trans <3
DOLL
face mold: nia would get a new face mold that is designed based on ethnically persian features
skin tone: 25 ("tan skin with warm neutral undertones")
eye color: dark brown
freckles: yes
hair cut: wavy, very long (kanani length)
hair color: dark brown
meet outfit: a trans pride flag colored scrunchy for her hair, a light blue zip-up sweatshirt that says "i am proud to be autistic" on the back, this t-shirt (a light blue t-shirt with fan art of dreamer with a trans pride flag cape) beneath that sweatshirt, these shorts (pastel plaid knee-length shorts), lindsey's striped leggings beneath those shorts, and sperry shoes
meet accessories: bright purple ear defenders, an AAC tablet, a doll-sized version of the 2021 dc pride comic book, this pink kryptonite chewelry
BOOK 1
(these books would have three authors - me, an author who is muslim and a second generation immigrant, and an author who is a trans woman of color. the reason for three authors is so that we can tell nia's story authentically - i'm autistic and have autism gender like nia, the second author is muslim and an immigrant like nia, and the third author is specifically a trans woman of color like nia.)
in chapter 1 we'll briefly go over this background information:
nia came out to her parents as trans on the car ride home from the last day of first grade. she chose the name "nia" because she wanted to name herself after nia nal, a character on her favorite show (supergirl) because nia nal is trans like she is, nia nal is an alien (and nia mahdi oftentimes feels like an alien around other humans), and nia nal is a really cool superhero! (unspoken: nia nal is nia mahdi's special interest.)
it took nia mahdi's parents a little bit of time to wrap their heads around her truth, but soon, they fully accepted nia for who she is.
that summer, her parents informed nia's school of her correct name, pronouns, and gender. and nia started growing out her hair, and she's never cut it since! nia loves her long hair.
when nia started second grade, nia's classmates sometimes accidentally called her by the wrong name and pronouns, but they always apologized and corrected themselves when nia pointed out their mistake. a few kids were confused, but once nia explained that she knows she's a girl just as well as you know you're a boy/girl, they all understood and accepted her :)
now onto the real content of the first book, which takes place from september to december:
nia's just started sixth grade at a new middle school. it's really loud, big, and hard. but she has a friend, ender. ender doesn't speak english well (he moved to america from turkey just last year), but that's okay because nia has trouble speaking sometimes too.
one day, nia's parents take her to a doctor, and she has to answer a lot of questions and take a lot of tests.
a few weeks later, nia's parents sit her down and tell her that she has been diagnosed with autism.
nia researches autism and feels very relieved and validated. (unspoken: autism becomes one of nia's special interests.)
at school, nia gets some cool accomodations: she's allowed to wear ear defenders at lunch and in the hallways, she can keep a tablet in her backpack to use for AAC when necessary, and she can use the school's sensory break room when necessary.
one time, nia gets very upset after receiving a "bad grade" on a reading test. a few of the questions asked her to identify characters' emotions, motivations, etc., and nia wants to explain to her teacher that her autism makes "emotional reading between the lines" hard for her. but she's so upset that her mouth isn't working properly, so she uses her AAC to talk to the teacher.
after that, one of nia's classmates makes a rude comment about her AAC. speaking through her AAC, nia explains to him why she uses her AAC. she stands up for herself.
in her free time, nia keeps researching autism and disability justice advocacy. she begins to think that her friend ender might be autistic too - he has a lot of autistic traits, and she's never felt alien around him in the way she does around most people.
she tells ender about her theory. ender says he's not sure whether or not he thinks he's autistic. but he does know that the hallways are far too loud, and he would like to be able to wear ear defenders like nia. so nia lends ender her spare pair of ear defenders.
the next day at lunch, ender gives nia back her ear defenders and reveals that he got in trouble for wearing in the hallway. the teacher thought he was wearing headphones and listening to music (which isn't allowed), and ender couldn't remember the english words to explain to her that they were just to shield him from the noise.
nia wants to help ender be able to wear defenders. she schedules a meeting with the guidance counselor. together, she and ender explain to the guidance counselor that ender just wants to wear ear defenders in the loud hallways. the counselor says that ender can't do that since he doesn't have an official accommodations letter.
nia leaves the office very upset. she knows from her research that autism diagnoses are very expensive and hard to get. she wants to find a way to get ender this accommodation without an official letter.
so nia makes a plan: she and ender write a long essay explaining why ender should be allowed to wear ear defenders.
they present the essay to the counselor, and she's convinced by their arguement. ender is now allowed to wear ear defenders in the hallway :)
to celebrate their victory, nia buys ender bright purple ear defenders (the same type she has) so that they can match :)
and that's the end of book 1
BOOK 2
book 2 takes place from january to march
nia goes on puberty blockers. nia's glad that she won't have to go through male puberty, but she also feels weird about it. nia is very excited to start wearing a hijab, and her mom says that she can start wearing a hijab when she goes through puberty and transitions from being a girl to being a woman. so, if nia isn't going through puberty now, when will she get to start wearing a hijab?
nia talks to ender about her problem. ender suggests that she should talk to her mom about it.
nia talks to her mom about her concerns. nia's mom explains that the shift from girl to woman involves more than just her body changing: it involves growth, strength of spirit, and learning about oneself. nia's mom will be able to tell when she's ready to start wearing the hijab, even if nia isn't going through puberty. nia feels a lot better now.
the next day at lunch, nia tells ender the good news. he is very happy for her. he then tells nia that he's scared of puberty too. he asks nia how she knew she was a girl, and nia explains how it was this strong internal feeling. ender reveals that he feels like he's not a boy or a girl. he's afraid that that means he's weird or broken. nia explains that he's not weird or broken - some people are non-binary, which means that they're not fully a boy or fully a girl. ender really likes that word. nia also tells ender that some non-binary like to use the gender-neutral pronouns "they/them" and asks ender if he would like her to start using those pronouns for him. ender says that he's not sure. he likes he/him pronouns, he thinks, at least for now. nia smiles and tells him that she's proud of him.
the spring dance is in march. nia and her mom go shopping for an oufit. at first, nia drifts towards the pretty dresses. she loves how they look and feels great in them, but she wants to try on suits too. she feels a little bit insecure when she realizes that she loves how she looks in the suit too. (plus, this navy suit will go better with her purple ear defenders than the colorful dresses will.) she's scared that her classmates will think she's not a "real girl" if she comes to the dance in a suit, but then she remembers her conversation with ender - when ender asked her how she knew she's a girl, her answer was that it was just something she knew. her gender isn't defined by her clothing preferences - she's just as much of a real girl in this suit as in those dresses. so nia buys the suit, and she feels very happy and confident.
at the dance, she finds that ender is wearing a skirt (and a tuxedo shirt and blazer). she runs up to him, and they both happy stim. they have a lot of fun dancing and snacking on cheez its together.
BOOK 3
book 3 takes place from april to june
the main plot of book 3 is going to be nia's grandmother visiting from iran for three months. nia learns a lot of new information about her family culture.
in june, to celebrate the end of the school year, nia's school has a multi-cultural night.
ender signs up to bring in some traditional turkish food and share some of the poetry his dad has written in turkish. he encourages nia to sign up for multi-cultural night too!
so nia signs up.
together, nia and her grandmother cook a ton of traditional iranian food to share at the celebration. she and her grandmother also work together to sew a special kaftan for nia.
the night of the celebration, nia dresses up in her kaftan and grabs the containers of food. as she's getting ready to leave, her father asks her to stop so he can take a picture of her. her mother says, "wait! i have one other thing for the picture!" (but spoken in faarsi). she emerges with a hijab for nia. she helps nia put on the hijab and tells nia that she's seen how nia's grown into a woman this past school year (aka, over the course of these 3 books). nia is so happy that she cries.
at the multi-cultural night, everyone loves the food and nia's kaftan and hijab. when ender sees nia's hijab, he starts happy stimming, and nia starts happy stimming too.
that's all my plans for goty 2022!
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The Christmas gift of writing.
Merry Christmas!
This one is for you dear @texaskitten30 . Thank you for hosting this @cordonianroyalty. Many more thanks to @indiacater for helping me out of my worries and pre reading it for me.
Book: The Royal Romance AU
Pairing: Drake x Olivia
Word count: 1376
Disclaimer: All characters belong to pixelberry.
Rating: Mature
Warning: Mention of pregnancy and childbirth.
Prompt: Features wackydrabbles prompt 71 in bold.
The Nevrakis-Walker Christmas

24 December 2019
“I don’t want to go.” Olivia threw a tantrum umpteenth time.
Drake again patiently tried convincing her. “Come on it’s been a month since we planned the Christmas eve at Beaumont’s manor.”
“Don’t push me Drake. I know you want to don the best uncle’s hat for Bartie and Eleanor. Go ahead. I. Don’t. Want. To. Go.”
“ Livia, please.” Drake closed the distance between them. Standing behind her, he curled his hands around her shoulders, kissing the loose red tendrils of hair away from her neck. “I promise it will be fun.”
“You said it last time too when that bone-head Beaumont set up the April fool prank and look where I stand now.”
Drake delicately moved his hands from her sides to cover her swollen belly. “Well, I don’t regret what we have here, thanks to that prank.”
01 April 2019
They were newly weds when Max called them over to help him prepare for his first book reading session while Bertrand was off to the palace for some official meeting. He locked them in the library and planned to have some fun on April fool’s day. As luck would have it, Bartie fell down and got hurt. Max had to rush to the hospital with Savannah and the couple was left bolted, forgotten by Max. Alone in the library without any rescue plan, soon their carnal desires took over. What were they thinking? No protection and a month later Olivia tested postive.
24 December 2019
Olivia leaned back, Drake taking her weight and trying to relieve her stress. Olivia was an organised person and this unplanned life changing event in their life was giving her nightmares. She was still not prepared, even after all the parenting classes Drake planned and attended with her. To add to it, she witnessed Eleanor’s birth and she was shit scared if she will be able to go through it.
“Livia, you were the smartest little girl I knew growing up. The sharpest teenager I admired and you bloomed into the strongest woman I know. You give me strength and courage to look into the eyes of this world. Our baby will be blessed to have you. You will be a great mother. And I promise I will be there with you at each step, always at your side to share all the moments. Please, stop questioning yourself.” He tilted his head to kiss her on her temple.
Olivia turned around and shrunk into him as he hugged her, trying to wash away her insecurities.
‘How? How will I take care of the tiny being? I grew up with servants, Liam and Drake were my only family. I have never known what being a mother is ? What if I hurt the little life? I want to give you the world Drake but I don’t know how?’ Olivia thought to herself but she still didn’t have the courage to voice it out in front of Drake. A teardrop rolled down her cheek whilst her face was hidden in his broad chest.
She pulled herself together for Drake once again and dressed up in the Red floral dress Drake had bought for her. “ For god’s sake, floral pattern Drake?” she had scowled.
“Don’t be stubborn, try it! Red colour is for you dear, the flowers are for our little bean.” he had lovingly planted a kiss on her growing tummy.
Drake was all smiles to see his wife in the dress. “Lose the grin Walker!” she threw the car keys at him, which he caught at the right moment without letting them smash his face.
As they drove to the Beaumont manor, Olivia warned Drake against Max. “ I promise you I will stab him if I find that bone head within 6 feet of my vicinity.”
“And I promise you that he won’t stand in the room that you occupy. He has still not revived of the shock you gave him last time when you tried to kill him by targeting that flower vase at him.”
Once at the manor, everyone got busy in the preparations for the festivities. Olivia kept close tab on Riley and keenly observed how Riley managed little Eleanor. Riley had sensed Olivia’s anxiety long back and would always keep the company whenever they met.
Max was always at safe distance. Even for dinner, he sat at the far end of the table away from Olivia.
After the meal, Riley and Savannah took their kids to bed. Bertrand and Max went to load the gifts with Bastein to be taken to the charity next day. Liam and Drake sat in the library and discussed the security for Christmas party at the palace. Olivia relaxed in the parlour. She got up to get a glass of water for herself when it all happened suddenly. Olivia felt a sudden rush of fluid down her legs. At the same time, Max came hurrying to pick the leftover gifts and bumped into Olivia. She twirled a bit as Max held her in his arms firmly but she lost her mind. “Drake!!!” she screamed.
Drake barged in, absorbed the scene in front of him and didn’t waste a second. He lifted Olivia and scurried to his car calling out, “ Liam call up the hospital and tell them I am on my way with the mamma bear.”
Luckily, Bastein was out near the car to help. He volunteered to drive them to the hospital.
In all the overwrought, no one realised that the younger Beaumont was left frozen in his place. He was scared to death, never realising that it wasn’t his fault.
“I told you I didn’t want to come!”
“Calm down dear. It has nothing to do with Max. All is under control. We were expecting this. It's time. Have faith Livia! Just breathe!” Drake maintained his poise while reassuring his wife.
Dr Montgomery was waiting at the hospital after receiving the phone call from the king himself. Olivia was admitted. Next few hours passed in a whirlwind, Olivia trying to concede in her fate, unsure about what was to happen. Drake never left her side for a minute. He was holding her hand and talking sweet nothings to their baby while soothing Olivia at the same time. He kept dabbing her face, rubbing her back running around for the ice chips. He had the hospital bag ready in the car for emergency. She had never even bothered about it. She knew he would be a doting father. Olivia was counting her blessings!
Her contractions started nearing and it was finally at the dawn of 25th December that the Duchess of Lythikos along with her loving husband welcomed their baby girl.
The royal couple who was waiting in a special room at the hospital was informed and called in, to greet baby Nevrakis-Walker. Max came with them.
Olivia was holding the tiny little red head in her arms, her eyes welled up with tears. Riley went to her side and hugged her. Liam congratulated the proud father while Max stood at a distance.
Olivia caught his attention and smiled, “Come here you!” Max apprehensively came close to her. She stretched out her free arm to hug him. “I have targeted you a lot this year. Blame those hormones.” Max was relieved that Olivia and baby were fine. “You planned it well for us Beaumont! Look we have a Christmas baby!” Olivia said gleefully. Drake was glad that his nervous Olivia was finally relaxed and happy. Max was overwhelmed, and left speechless. He just hugged her back.
“So what do we call this little bundle of joy?” Riley asked, all excited.
Olivia looked at Drake quizzically. Drake circled his arm around Olivia and gently moved his fingers over their little red head. “Lilith, fierce and strong, just like her mother.”
“Lilith,” Olivia repeated softly. “You will be the strong and protective eldest daughter of our family.”
“Livia!” Drake was surprised at her announcement. His wife who was unwilling to accept any change in her life till a day prior just announced that she was ready to dive in and let the family grow! He couldn’t stop himself and kissed his wife. Olivia was beaming at him.
Tags: @ao719 @aloneautumn @bebepac @charlotteg234 @choicesficwriterscreations @choiceskatie @cordonia-gothqueen @cordonianroyalty @drakewalker04 @gkittylove99 @glaimtruelovealways @kat-tia801 @hopefulmoonobject @hopelessromanticmonie @iam-the-kind-and-thoughtful @idontknowwhysblog-blog @islandcrow @jovialyouthmusic @jaxsmutsuo @kingliam2019 @lovablegranny @mrswalkers-blog @mom2000aggie @no-one-u-know @ntoraplayschoices @princessleac1 @ritachacha @speedyoperarascalparty @shanzay44 @queenrileyrose @sanchita012 @sfb123 @theroyalheirshadowhunter @wackydrabbles @yourmajesty09
Tagging those in the Christmas Gift of Writing @texaskitten30 @kingliam2019 @iaminlovewithtrr @anjanettexcordonia @kat-tia801 @eadanga @xxrainbow-princessxx
#pixelberry#playchoices#the royal romance#drake walker#trr#trr fandom#twinkleallnight#olivia nevrakis#christmas fic
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Leftovers - Part 8 - Nandor the Relentless x Reader Fanfic
Previous parts: Masterlist
Summary: The night of the vampire orgy arrives and brings with it a boat load of angst!
A/N: I decided to just run with it and let my angst flag fly. Bon appetit!
Warnings: Female reader, Angst, dumbassery, idiots in love, infidelity I guess
---
The cameraman steps up to the barred window of the cell and points his lens inside. You’re curled up with Guillermo on a hastily installed couch, leaning into one another for warmth in the cold, damp room. A mouse scurries across the floor and something drips from the ceiling over your heads.
“You don’t think they forgot about us, do you?” you ask, trepidation clear in your voice. You tug the sleeves of your sweatshirt down to cover your frozen hands and press yourself further into his body for warmth.
Guillermo glances at the camera with a wince as he lies, “No. I’m sure they didn’t forget us.”
---
Earlier in the evening:
“The last orgy was a bit of a disaster and I never got to use it…”
Nandor stands in the middle of his room, doing a twirl for the camera to show off his outfit. Chains and leather straps crisscross his bare chest, and his waist and legs are studded with protruding dildos of varying sizes.
“Life of the orgy!” he gushes.
There’s a beat of silence that follows and then a muted question from the documentary crew, “And will...[unintelligible]...be participating in the orgy?”
Nandor avoids answering, looking away from the camera and baring his fangs in a nervous smile.
---
Guillermo’s lying across your bed, absently scrolling on his phone while you dig through your closet, holding up and rejecting piece after piece. Your “style,” if you could call it that, consists almost entirely of work out clothes, derby merch and the odd sundress for special occasions. Not exactly ripe pickings for a vampire orgy ensemble. But you know you still have that pair of fishnets from when you first joined the league and you figure you can build a look around them.
“So, you’re not gonna wear the t-shirt?” Guillermo grins, rolling onto his side and showing off the highly fashionable “Do Not Eat” shirt.
“Nandor will protect me,” you reply automatically, your voice is muffled from the back of the closet. “I just moved in! How can it be such a disaster already?”
Guillermo gets up and comes over to lean on the door frame of the closet as he cautiously warns, “Uh...okay, but...Nandor isn’t--um--he’s not known for being very reliable in social situations…”
Guillermo’s mind flashes back to the time at Simon the Devious’s club, when Nandor would have gladly handed him over to a strange vampire just to avoid confrontation. Still, his loyalty tugs at him and he adds, “I mean, his heart is in the right place...most of the time. But he just gets so excited and he has this need to impress when he’s around other vampires.”
You back out of the closet, clutching the rogue fishnets victoriously in your hands and looking back at Guillermo quizzically, “I know he can be flakey, Guillermo. But...he loves me.”
You recall the words falling from his lips that night...my love...and an irresistible smile forms on your lips.
Guillermo stares at you, gobsmacked, for a moment before replying, “Alright, Smash. But...are you sure you even want to go? I mean--and don’t be offended--you lost your virginity like a minute ago and now you’re going to an orgy?”
Heat spreads across your face and you look pointedly away from your friend. You walk over to the bed and pick up the little card from your nightstand, smiling down at it and tracing your fingers over the glittery letters. After a minute you finally answer, “It’s not--I mean, I’m not going to...do anything with anyone else. I just have to be there because…”
Because you’re afraid your boyfriend is going to have insane vampire sex with strangers if you don’t keep an eye on him… Because you’re too chicken to actually talk with him about it… Because what if he thinks you’re silly and stupid and decides being with a human is just as boring as he always assumed?
Guillermo reads your thoughts on your face and he croons, “Oh, honey. Listen, I was here for the last orgy. And, even though it never really got going… Smash, it’s not something for the faint of heart.”
“I’m not faint of heart!” you insist, your voice pitched up in indignation.
“No!” Guillermo agrees, moving to sit beside you on the bed. “No, you’re not. You’re in love with an immortal blood-sucking fiend who has centuries of experience on you, though. And you’re very, very new to...all of this. I don’t want to see you get hurt. You should talk to him.”
You can tell from his tone that Guillermo isn’t optimistic about the likelihood of Nandor understanding your human worries and actually changing his ingrained behavior in response. But you know he’s right, you should still talk to him.
---
You find Nandor in his room, making a few last minute adjustments to his attire. As soon as you set eyes on him you stop in your tracks, making an involuntary choking sound as you take in the ridiculous number of enormous dildos strapped to his body.
Nandor looks up as you enter and he puffs out his chest, stalking toward you with his arms held up and his mouth open in a menacing hiss.
“What do you think, my mortal? Do you want to run in fear...or do you want to come?”
You can’t think of a single thing to say to that. All that’s running through your head as you stare, transfixed, at Nandor’s ridiculous costume, is that he clearly hasn’t planned this with his freshly deflowered lover in mind.
You finally clear your throat nervously and mutter, “That’s what you’re planning to wear?”
You look down at your PJ pants and hoodie, feeling suddenly, painfully ordinary. How could you have ever thought you were a match for someone as intense, seductive and dangerous as Nandor the Relentless?
Nandor misses your reaction and enthuses, “Isn’t it great? If I position myself just right--” he drops into a squat-- “I can accommodate two astride each knee and hip while still having room at my pelvis…”
He starts thrusting into the air lewdly and you hold out your hands to stop him.
“Nandor,” you’re at a loss for words, feeling a hollow ache in your chest already anticipating the hurt to come. “I thought now that we’re...an item...you might want it to just be you and me, tonight.” And forever.
Nandor stops mid-thrust with a quizzical expression, “At an orgy?”
“Well…” how to explain your seemingly very human sensibilities on monogamy. “You said you love me, right?”
Nandor rises and comes toward you, looming over your smaller frame and taking your shoulders in his large hands as he answers, “Yes, my sweet mortal. But what does that have to do with the vampire orgy? Didn’t Nadja explain to you--?”
“Yes, yes!” you interrupt, frustrated. “But I don’t want you to...have sex with anyone else! Not while we’re…”
The cameraman bumps into a heavy lamp by the door, momentarily drawing Nandor’s attention. Suddenly feeling the weight of expectation on his shoulders, Nandor bristles and straightens his shoulders as he answers your concern.
“But you are my human,” he says, slowly as if he’s explaining to a child. “I am not your vampire.”
You close your eyes for a second, holding a hand to your chest as if you can somehow stop the damage happening inside. You really didn’t think he could hurt you so much with just a few words.
Desperately you try one last approach, “But...if you’re going to be busy having crazy, acrobatic sex with all these strange vampires...how are you going to protect me? Or do you think Nadja’s t-shirt is really going to stop someone who’s determined?”
“Ahhh!” Nandor cries with a relieved smile. “That’s your worry! Well, fear not, my human. I have worked out the perfect arrangement to keep both you and Guillermo safe for the evening.”
---
Nandor, wearing a heavy, fur-lined robe over his sex gear, leads you and Guillermo down the narrow staircase into the basement. You haven’t been down here since your first night in the house, when Nandor locked you up in the cell to save for later. Though it’s late April, there’s snow on the ground outside and a chill in the air. As you descend the steps the temperature drops even more. But you hardly notice in your effort to keep yourself from falling apart after your disastrous discussion with Nandor. Your eyes are trained on the broad expanse of his back, as if you can somehow will him to turn around and really see how much you’re hurting. Guillermo takes your hand in his and gives it a squeeze.
“Here we are!” Nandor announces, stopping in front of the human cell with a grandiose sweep of his arm. “I’ve made it nice and cozy for you. You’ll be locked up safe and sound, so no wandering vampires can get you. And I’ll come down and let you out before dawn.”
You glance skeptically inside and see that one of the couches from the library has been moved down here for your comfort. Other than that it’s still the same damp, dark, depressing cell you remember.
“Nandor, this is...extreme,” you complain, looking up to meet his eyes for the first time since you left his room after he said those harsh words. You see his gaze flicker as he takes in your red-rimmed, tear-misted eyes, but his expression is inscrutable.
“I agree, master. We could just stay upstairs in Smash’s room…”
“Silence, Guillermo!” he hisses, not taking his eyes off of you. He reaches up to cup your face in his hands and his expression softens. “This is the safest place for you to be. Only I have the key to the cell. You will be...protected.”
“I don’t care about being protected!” you cry. “I just want--”
“Enough! My word is final on this!” Nandor cuts you off and his tone is closer to the one he uses for Guillermo. You shrink away from his touch and he looks crestfallen for a second, but then he straightens his spine adopting the warrior’s confidence that he wears like a robe to cover what’s underneath. “Into the cell, now. Both of you.”
The door closes with a creak of its hinges and the heavy thunk of the lock sliding into place.
Nandor peaks through the barred window and waves at the two of you, “Alright, have a good night! Wish me luck at the orgy!”
His footsteps echo through the basement as he walks away, trailing the camera crew behind him. Once they leave, the cell is only dimly illuminated by the guttering flame of a single candle stick mounted on the wall outside. You meet Guillemo’s eyes silently for a long moment and then plunk down onto the couch and cry.
---
“Shit! Shit! Shit!” Nandor curses frantically as he clambers down the basement steps, two at a time.
It’s the night after the orgy. He’d gone to bed at dawn feeling drained--literally and figuratively--and covered in the slow-to-heal puncture wounds characteristic of vampire fangs. The orgy was a resounding success. Though, truth be told, Nandor spent much of the night going through the motions as his mind fixated on the look of hurt betrayal on his human’s face before the party. He couldn’t understand why you’d begrudge him a night of dark fornication, a celebration of his vampiric identity. Nor why you’d resent his efforts to keep you safe from the violent debauchery. All he knew for sure was that with each new sexual encounter of the evening he found himself missing you and wishing more and more that you were by his side.
That is, until he and Laszlo partook of some opium infused blood towards the end of the festivities. Nandor stumbled to bed with a pleasant buzzing in his head that completely drowned out the small voice warning him that there was something important he’d forgotten.
“She’s going to be pissed!” he hisses into the camera while rushing down the dark corridor toward the cell. As he approaches the door he says, louder, “Good evening! Wake up time! Everyone have a nice sleep?”
He turns the key in the lock and swings open the door, ducking inside with a grimace of trepidation. He finds you curled up with Guillermo on the couch. The two of you are shivering against the cold that feels like it’s settled permanently into your bones. You’ve spent an entire night and a day locked in a frigid cell without a blanket, food, or any amenities whatsoever.
Nandor fiddles his fingers nervously and asks, “Guillermo...mortal...are you alright?”
It’s Guillermo who finally answers, “You forgot about us.”
“No, no...not exactly,” Nandor denies. “But you know how it is with guests over. Things get very hectic--”
“You forgot,” Guillermo repeats. “About. Us.”
Nandor’s shrugs helplessly, “A...bit. I forgot a bit.”
You can feel the intensity of his eyes on you, but you refuse to look up as you stand on shaky legs and make your way around him and out of the basement.
Nandor stands there silently for a moment before turning to the camera and mouthing, “Fuck.”
---
Tags:
@festering-queen @kandomeresbitch @strangestdiary @glitterportrait @scuzmunkie @redwoodshadows
#nandor#nandor the relentless#nandor x reader#nandor the relentless x reader#nandor the relentless imagine#nandor the relentless fanfic#wwdits#wwdits fanfic#what we do in the shadows#what we do in the shadows fanfic
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2nd Brassica Bonus Short Story
We spontaneously wanted to do something nice for April Fools this year but ended up posting this story days later on our Blog. Now we resurrect our Tumblr by posting this here as well. Have fun reading this cute story from when Hans hasn’t turned into a flirt yet, and was still a teen! (oミ゚ロ゚ミ)o
On the first day of the fourth month, almost a full decade ago, the rulers of all kingdoms allied with Auxtome convened to discuss and negotiate matters that were of little interest to a certain adolescent princess named Avril. Matters like infrastructure, trade agreements, and other things that made her yawn just at the thought.
Within Poisson, her country, the princess was quite famous for being energetic and mischievous, rather fitting with the deep red color of her hair. But no one minded because she was also aware of her duties and never failed to fulfill them. Still, full days of economic discussions were just about last on the list of things Avril wanted to spend her time with.
Thankfully, her parents were the ones attending the conference. She only accompanied them to make her debut among all the young royals that would be at the palace. And while that too had its downsides as far as she was concerned, the prospect of spending two weeks in Auxtome and meeting new, possibly interesting people still left her excited.
Their carriage was passing through Auxtome’s capital, its streets adorned with flowers and decorated festively to welcome the esteemed guests from all around the continent. Even as her mother spoke to her, Avril could hardly tear her eyes from the window.
“The conference begins right after we arrive, but the crown prince of this land, Prince Hans, has volunteered to give all young royals a tour of the palace. He is about your age. I trust you will dress… appropriately for the occasion?”
Avril had no need to look at her mother to recognize the look she was giving her, and the meaning it was meant to convey.
“Of course mother, I have brought garments suitable for every occasion,” she replied.
“Good,” her mother acknowledged, pleased, and turned back to her husband now that they were nearing the palace grounds.
Avril smiled to herself. An entire day without her parents or retainers promised to be delightful. And she had a plan to make the most of all the possibilities that were already racing through her mind.
Atop the foyer stairs of his family’s palace, Prince Hans was waiting for his guests long before the first one arrived; his posture sublime and his smile well practiced. At only 13 summers he was quite young to be given such an important duty, but he had long established himself as reliable and well-versed in social affairs. Next to him stood his half-brother, Lorens, a few years younger and much more prone to show it. Hans didn’t dislike him per se, but it was always exhausting to have him near during official business. Or when he wanted some quiet. To his relief, he would only stay through the greeting.
All around the room were attendants to aid the guests and lead them to their quarters before escorting the princes and princesses back once the tour was set to begin.
“Could you quit your fidgeting?” Hans asked his half-brother as he glanced to the side. “You’re representing our family today, just what would our guests think of us if they saw you right now?”
Lorens sighed deeply and tried his best to copy Hans’ demeanor.
“But no one’s here yet. It’s tiring to stand still for so long.”
“Practice makes perfect,” Hans replied sternly. “You’ll learn to endure before long.”
Before long unfortunately only described how long it took for Lorens to forget his discipline again. But Hans was used to this.
As the first guests arrived, Hans stepped down the stairs for the greeting and raised his charm to the max. Lorens remained in his shadow, politely participating in the greeting but drawing little attention. Although he didn’t show it, Hans felt quite relieved.
The guests were so plentiful that even the astute crown prince had trouble remembering all their faces and names immediately, but he knew there would be a second greeting once all the young royals assembled for the palace tour, and the coming days left enough time to memorize all the names of their parents.
And thus, the time for the tour quickly arrived!
About a dozen young royals now gathered in the foyer, from nearly just as many kingdoms; one of them from the kingdom of Radix and another, the youngest prince hailing from Theotherkingdom. Although Hans couldn’t seem to remember his name, or face, no matter how hard he tried.
The last royal to introduce themselves was one with hair as deeply red as cherries, who was dressed in clothes so dashing that even Hans felt a hint of jealousy.
“I am Avril of Poisson. Pleased to make your acquaintance, everyone.”
“Likewise, Prince Avril. Thank you for joining us today,” Hans smoothly replied and proceeded to announce the schedule for the day.
Unbeknownst to him, Avril smiled to herself that her deception was a success. Everyone seemed to share Prince Hans’ impression that she was a prince—a boy—and while she felt no desire to be one for more than a few hours, Avril was quite thrilled to spend the day as the other princes’ equal and not a potential future bride.
With the introduction out of the way, Hans lost no time to begin the tour, leading the group of royals past every notable part of the palace. As such, it went on for quite a while!
As he talked about his home and its long history, Hans couldn’t hide his pride. He made sure not to ramble, still there was no shortage of anecdotes coming from the young prince. Most of his guests seemed quite captivated. But Avril felt her boredom reach critical mass.
“And here we have our palace’s library,” Hans continued, elegantly gesturing towards it, ever unaware of the princess’s disinterest. “No other library in the entire kingdom, maybe even the world, has such an extensive collection of magic tomes. Some of them are so rare and powerful, that they are locked within a separate chamber.”
For the first time since the tour started, Avril’s ears perked up.
“Not even I am allowed to enter it, but rest assured, the rest of the library is still as exciting as it is stunning.”
The tour continued and Hans led everyone past the royal family’s private chambers, through luxuriant halls filled to the brim with paintings of all the noble figures of Auxtome’s history, and many more attractions until they reached one of the larger banquet halls the palace housed. Prince Hans turned to his guests, an unwavering smile still on his face.
“Now then, I’m sure all this walking on top of your travels has left you with quite an appetite. Our chefs have prepared all of our kingdom’s finest specialties, so eat to your heart’s content. If there is anything you need, our attendants will be right at your service.”
As he wrapped up the tour and exchanged some more pleasantries with a few of the other royals, Hans looked around to make sure that everything was in order.
The first thing he noticed was the absence of his half-brother. He had been sure Lorens would have joined again by the time food was served. Not least of all because Lorens’ mother probably urged him to build connections with the other kingdoms’ royals.
And then Hans realized that a certain red-haired prince was missing as well.
Politely excusing himself from the conversation, Hans beckoned his personal attendant over.
“Say, have you seen Prince Avril?” he whispered so no one else would hear.
“No, my lord. By the time we reached the banquet hall, he was already gone.”
Just for a second, Hans furrowed his brow.
“And you thought not to inform me of this? We have to find him immediately!”
The attendant apologetically bowed, but Hans was already rushing towards the door, slowing down halfway as he realized the others might notice something was wrong if he didn’t.
His pace quickened again as soon as he was out of sight. As he backtracked the path they took to the hall, Hans looked around, growing tenser by the second. If something had happened, it would be his responsibility.
A commotion near the library finally drew his attention. Most of all, a voice he knew well.
“Lorens? What is going on here?” Hans asked as he saw the younger prince standing inside the library, shaking, surrounded by a group of tense looking guards.
Lorens’ face lit up as he saw the other.
“Brother! You need to stop them!”
Hans shot a questioning glance towards the guard closest to him who gulped, before stumbling over his words.
“M-my Lord, it is not how it looks. We heard a sound within the forbidden section of the library and came looking for an intruder, only to find that one tome is missing.”
He hesitated, glancing over to his fellow guards who were suddenly immensely captivated by the floor.
“A-and Prince Lorens right next to where it should have been.”
Hans sighed and slowly turned to his brother, raising a brow.
“I didn’t take it!” Lorens protested, immediately understanding the unspoken question.
“You heard him,” Hans said to the guard, primarily out of a sense of obligation. “You don’t intend to question the word of a prince, do you?”
“O-of course not!” replied the guard. “We never suspected Prince Lorens, but we still have to inform the king and queen of the missing book and his trespassing.”
Now it dawned on Hans what his half-brother wanted him to stop. Once more he turned to Lorens, who he’d never seen with such a pleading look on his face. For a moment Hans thought about what he would say. Then he turned back to the guard.
“I shall give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you mean to fulfill your duty, but all such a report will accomplish is that it draws attention to the fact that someone could steal one of our most prized artifacts from right under your noses. You’ll be lucky if you just lose your jobs.”
The guards flinched.
“But what should we do then, my Lord? Hiding the theft would surely be worse!”
“Isn’t that obvious? Search for the thieves! Who knows how far they might have gotten during all this time you wasted here.”
“Y-yes! Of course!”
The guards frantically spread out to search the area, leaving the princes on their own.
“Thank you, brother! I knew you would help me,” Lorens chirped.
“It was nothing. Had you been more confident, you could have solved this on your own; don’t forget that you are a prince!”
The younger prince’s enthusiasm dampened a little, but he nodded in understanding.
“So what were you doing in the forbidden part of the library?” Hans asked, his suspicion that Lorens might have taken the book not entirely quelled.
“I just… I wanted to learn. I’m not making any progress with my magic training.” Lorens quietly replied, a pout forming on his face. “The books there are about powerful magic, right?”
“They are. But that’s hardly where you should look for knowledge if you are struggling with the basics. Now let’s get you out of here.”
Hans didn’t wait for a reply before turning around and walking out of the library.
Lorens only hesitated for a moment, still he had to run to catch up with his brother.
“Wait, where are we going?” he asked, slightly out of breath.
“Your room. If there’s a criminal on the loose, you shouldn’t stroll around the castle on your own.”
The young prince stopped in his tracks, visibly displeased at the notion of having to remain in his room for a yet undetermined amount of time, but he continued to follow without complaints.
Once his half-brother was within his chambers, Hans turned back to the door only to be held up by a hesitant voice.
“What about you?” Lorens asked.
“I’ll have to take care of our guests until the situation is resolved.”
“That’s not fair, I want to help, too!” the younger prince protested.
Hans looked at the other, giving him as much of a sympathetic smile as he could muster.
“You’ll help me by staying out of trouble.”
“Okay…” Lorens relented.
Back in the hallway, Hans gestured the guards to lock the door to Lorens’ private quarters.
While it hadn’t been a lie that Hans worried about his half-brother being on his own while an intruder roamed the palace, it was only true in the case that Lorens himself wasn’t the thief. Locking him in for the time being was sure to avoid further problems in either case. Hans was quite pleased with his pragmatic decision. But the issue of the vanished Prince Avril still weighed on his mind, so Hans hurried back to the banquet hall. In the best case, Avril had joined the others by now. And even if not, Hans couldn’t stay away for too long or it would reflect badly on his hospitality.
Prince Hans did his best to appear more composed than he felt as he strode through the doors into the hall. The other royals seemed to enjoy the buffet, and there were no signs that anyone had caught wind of the commotion at the library.
Stifling a sigh of relief, Hans joined in with the crowd just to be seen, hoping his brief absence hadn’t been noticed by too many. He had barely finished a first round through the room when something red caught his attention from the corner of his eye.
Avril was back.
Making sure to appear unfazed, Hans approached her.
“Prince Avril, we haven’t had the pleasure of conversing since our greeting. I hope the tour was to your liking?”
Avril smiled at him, a hint of mischief in her eyes, but Hans didn’t seem to notice.
“Oh yes, it was quite long, but your palace is impressive indeed.”
Hans relaxed at her words, sure she would have said something if her brief absence would have been due to unpleasant reasons.
“The library especially,” Avril added, looking into Hans’ eyes just a little too deeply, a knowing grin on her face.
Confusion overcame the prince. Was Avril insinuating that she saw what happened there? Or might she be the culprit?
“That’s true, the library is among my favorites as well,” Prince Hans said, for the first time struggling to keep up his smile. “Would you like to visit it again? Maybe pick up a book or two?”
Hans failed to hide the silent accusation within his questions, leaving Avril visibly amused.
“Why, that sounds wonderful. Another book would certainly do no harm.”
Now Hans was sure that she was toying with him, but without proof he could not accuse her so lightly.
“Great, just give me a moment, then we can leave.”
Hans gracefully stepped on a small stage near the buffet, usually used for musicians, and it didn’t take long until all royals in the room had their eyes on him.
“My esteemed guests, I hope the food was to your liking. From now until dinner, you are free to spend your time however you like. You can return to your quarters or enjoy some recreation at one of the many facilities you have seen today. If there is anything on your mind, do not hesitate to approach me or the attendants that will be serving you for the duration of your stay.”
As soon as it was socially acceptable for Hans to leave, he returned to Avril, who he had never let out of his vision.
“Well then, shall we go?” he asked, his smile more forced than usual.
The walk towards the library was tense. Should Hans be mistaken, an accusation of this scale would surely cause heavy repercussions not just for him but potentially their standing with Poisson as well. If he was right though…
They passed Lorens’ quarters, and a thought made Hans stop in his tracks. Did his half-brother maybe see Avril in the library? Was he not the thief but a witness, perhaps?
“My apologies, I just remembered that I have to ask my brother about something. It will only take a second.”
Tensely, Hans made the guards unlock the door and stepped into the room. But the prince he was looking for was nowhere to be seen.
“Lorens?” Hans called out as he looked around the room. “Now is not the time to play tricks, I need to speak with you!”
Avril followed him into the room and promptly walked towards the bed.
“Hey, what’s that?” she asked, holding up an old-looking book and feigning ignorance.
Hans paled on the spot. It was a tome he had never seen before. Surely the one that was stolen!
His mind was racing. So was Lorens the culprit after all? Did he escape somehow after realizing that Hans still suspected him? But then why was the book still here…
The grin on Avril’s face ultimately told Hans the truth.
“It was you, wasn’t it?!” he let slip more bluntly than he had ever spoken to another and immediately covered his mouth in panic.
Avril simply laughed.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she teased and started flipping through the book.
“Stop that! What have you done with Lorens?”
Hans slowly regained his confidence now that he was sure he found the thief, but her casual demeanor still confused him deeply.
“Nothing. I just took pity on the poor boy. Locked away by his own brother, it was quite heartbreaking to watch.”
“Half-brother. And this room is certainly not a prison!”
Avril closed the book and stepped closer to Hans.
“You're right, breaking him out wasn’t even difficult.”
Hans gasped at the ease with which Avril admitted breaking into a prince’s quarters and taking him away.
“Where have you taken him? What do you want? Money? Is this a scheme to gain the upper hand in the negotiations?”
Avril’s smile briefly faded before she burst into laughter.
“Why are you always so serious? No wonder the tour was duller than Poisson’s tundras. I just want to have some fun!”
Hans blinked in confusion.
“Fun? This is a game to you? Stealing an ancient artifact and abducting a prince are grave matters!”
Avril sighed theatrically and tossed the book over to Hans, who clumsily caught it before checking frantically if it was undamaged.
“Relax. I never meant to keep it, and your brother is just fine. He even went with me voluntarily.”
“Of course he did,” Hans cursed under his breath but felt some relief that Avril seemed to harbor no malicious intent. Her actions caused him a major headache nonetheless.
“Well, fine. I’d be willing to let all this be bygones if you just tell me where he is.”
Disappointment showed on Avril’s face.
“What? But it just got interesting…”
She fidgeted a little, clearly reluctant to say anything more. Hans remained stern.
“Alright, I give in,” she eventually said. “He’s at the top of the eastern watchtower.”
“Atop the—” Hans blurted out, unbelieving, but quickly found his composure again. “That is absurd. You would have never managed to take him there in such a short amount of time.”
A hint of a smile reappeared on Avril’s face.
“Are you sure? I also broke into the forbidden part of the library and this room with no one noticing. I’m quite skilled~”
Hans opened his mouth to retort, but paused. Avril was right, she had already done what he believed to be impossible. At least a chance that Lorens was really in the tower existed.
“Fine, but you’ll come with me. I won’t let you out of my sight again until this is resolved!”
A broad grin spread across Avril’s face.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
Prince Hans did his best not to complain as they ascended the stairs of the eastern watchtower. Not just because it took them minutes and climbing stairs wasn’t exactly his favorite pastime, but because Avril kept whistling a cheerful song. Drifting slightly off-key every other bar, and he could tell it was on purpose.
Two flights below the top, he lost his patience.
“Is it your goal to torment me, Prince Avril, or is there a deeper meaning in this noise I just can’t see?”
“Prince Hans, how could you insinuate such a thing!” Avril replied, acting playfully hurt. “I simply like the echo within this tower. And the face you make when you’re trying to hide your annoyance~”
Hans paused and turned to Avril.
“What face?” he asked, genuinely unsure.
“This one,” Avril said cheerfully. “The fake smile you just barely manage to keep up. Unless someone looks you in the eyes for too long, or notices that it’s just a facade, or maybe both, and—”
“Enough!” Hans shouted—his face bright red—and turned away. “I don’t know what I did to you to deserve this, but please cease this mockery.”
For once Avril stayed quiet and the two of them silently continued their climb. Shortly before they reached the top, she softly spoke up.
“There is no deeper meaning. And I’m not trying to torment you. I simply thought you could benefit from loosening up a little.”
“Loosen up?” Hans asked unbelieving. “I’m the crown prince of this land, such a luxury isn’t within my grasp.”
“See, that’s why you’re so boring,” Avril said and passed Hans, who had stopped on the stairs. “Being the crown prince is all the more reason to let loose any chance you get. As long as you fulfill your duties, no one can even get mad at you.”
“And just what would you understand of—” Hans began to retort as he followed Avril up the stairs, but then they reached the top of the tower.
Which was utterly empty?
“You lied to me!” Hans complained as he stomped up the last few steps. “Lorens was never here, was he?!”
“How mean! I think I just misremembered. Maybe he was in the western watchtower?”
For just a second Hans contemplated the possibility, but he had given the red-haired royal the benefit of the doubt too many times already.
“Oh no, I won’t believe another word you say! You sent me on a wild goose chase for nothing but your own enjoyment.”
“I think a wild goose would be much harder to catch than that docile little brother of yours,” Avril replied matter-of-factly.
Prince Hans stared at her for a moment, overflowing with a powerful mixture of anger, annoyance, and a few other emotions he had trouble deciphering this very second.
“You… I… gah!”
Without another word, he stormed off as Avril burst into laughter behind him.
He could hear her follow down behind him not long after, and even as he sped up, she suddenly appeared right next to him.
“Wait up, where are you going?”
“Downstairs,” Hans grumbled, not keen to be roped into yet another of her pranks.
“Aw, but you didn’t even take in the view, it’s quite stunning.”
“I know, I live here.”
Avril fell back a few steps as she noticed his disdain, but she wasn’t ready to give up just yet.
“Okay, okay, I’m sorry. Maybe I overdid it a little. How about I tell you if you’re getting closer to your brother’s location to make up for it?”
Hans quietly contemplated her suggestion. Of course it could be another ploy to make him run in circles. Still, maybe Avril really was remorseful and if he had to search the entire palace anyway…
“Very well, my prince. But if I sense so much as the hint of a lie, I’ll inform our parents of your misdeeds today.”
Avril promptly picked up pace and caught up to him.
“That won’t happen, promise!”
Hans wasn’t entirely sure if it was the first time he had seen the other royal smile without any kind of mischief in mind or if he just hadn’t seen her smile so up close, but he felt a lightness in his stomach that he had trouble rationalizing.
He couldn’t like her; not like that. Especially because she was a boy! Or so he thought. It was quite the confusing situation for the young prince.
The two of them had soon searched the entire eastern half of the palace. Avril did little but nudging the other prince into a different direction when he appeared to be stuck, but she thoroughly enjoyed their unconventional game of hide and seek. Hans on the other hand grew ever more flustered to spend so much time alone with the red-haired prince. His mind was racing, trying to come up with explanations for the surge of new feelings he experienced while they were in close proximity.
As time went on, his searching became less and less thorough, eventually just boiling down to a question of “Is he around here?” that was always answered with a simple “No.”
When he grew tired, Hans sat down in one of the palace’s lounges and Avril slouched down next to him with posture so unbecoming of a royal, it was almost offensive to Hans. As if out of reflex, he straightened his own to be even more perfect.
“Say, are you sure you’re not a peasant who just happened to sneak into this tour?”
Avril looked shocked, or maybe just surprised, but she heartily laughed before replying.
“So your silver tongue does have some edge to it. If I pester you a little more, do you think you might permanently lose that stick up your a—”
Hans jumped up, a distraught look on his face.
“Prince Avril, don’t utter such a vulgar word within this palace!”
“So if we go outside, it would be okay?” she asked, amused.
“Well, I mean…”
As many other times this day, Hans was at a loss for words. He still wasn’t used to this feeling. No one else had ever made him feel like he wasn’t in control, and the more it happened, the more unsure he was if he truly despised it.
He took a deep breath.
“I don’t know? Get your a-ass outside and try it if you want.”
The deep blush that appeared on Hans’ face was about as amusing to Avril as the words that caused it, but most of all she enjoyed watching him lose the need to always be proper. Some might call her a bad influence, but she truly believed she was doing him a favor. And herself. Because her day had become significantly more enjoyable since coaxing the crown prince out of his shell.
“Shouldn’t we find your brother first?”
Hans’ expression darkened slightly.
“We’ve already searched almost the entire palace, and all remaining rooms are off limits. Besides, what need do you have for finding him? You know exactly where he is!”
Avril feigned mulling over his words.
“Off limits? Just which rooms might you be talking about?”
A realization dawned on Hans, and he didn’t like it one bit.
“Oh no, you didn’t,” he whispered sharply before storming out of the room, his destination more than clear.
“Did what?” Avril asked innocently as she jogged up to him.
“Don’t act like you don’t know, you’ve hidden him in my personal quarters, haven’t you? The one place no one but me and a select few servants are allowed to enter!”
Avril chuckled.
“If you put it like that, it makes me want to go there all the more~”
Without another word, Hans hurried to his room. The guards were still in place, and normally he wouldn’t have believed that anyone could get past them, but as he stepped inside he saw… Lorens. Lying on Hans’ most luxurious carpet surrounded by a pile of his magic books.
“Brother!” Lorens happily exclaimed on reflex before his expression turned sullen. “You found me.”
“Of course I have! But what were you thinking, hiding in my quarters?”
“Prince Avril told me to. He said he’d let me look through the stolen book if you didn’t find me.”
Upon hearing this explanation, Hans shot an angry glare towards Avril, who sheepishly smiled back at him.
“You should know better than to take part in such foolish ploys! Don’t you realize that he simply used you; made you complicit in his crimes?”
“No offense,” he added towards Avril before questioning just who he was angry at.
“I’m sorry,” Lorens grumbled and got up from the pile of books. “I just want to become a better mage. Like you.”
The words got stuck in Hans’ throat, but he had no chance to reply anyway, as Avril stepped in.
“Aw, you can’t get angry at him, can you? He just wants to be more like his big brother!”
“W-well, there are better ways to go about that,” Hans deflected, still flustered.
“Why don’t you teach him? You even have that special book with you.”
Just then Hans realized he was still clutching the book Avril stole from the library. He went through multiple stages of panic that others might now think he was the thief before concluding that no one else in the palace would even know what the book looked like.
“It is not yet my place to teach,” Hans said sternly.
Avril now joined Lorens to put on her best puppy eyes.
“Aw, please, just a little. I wanna see some magic, too.”
It took quite a bit of begging, but eventually the two of them wore Hans down.
“Okay, fine! But I’ll just go over the basics. We need to return the book before my parents hear of its absence.”
A celebratory cheer went through Hans’ chambers and its perpetrators expectantly sat down on the chaise longue. Hans began reciting what his magic instructor taught him years ago, much to Avril’s disappointment who had expected a much more hands-on presentation.
“In essence, the core of magic is to manifest a will, and turn it into reality. Our world, however, does not allow its balance to be upset. Anything you gain will be taken away in equal measure. Estimating these risks is the greatest skill a mage can have.”
The only one still captivated by Hans’ lecture at that point was Lorens. But even his enthusiasm dampened when the words sank in.
“Wait, no matter what you do, there will be downsides to your spells?” he asked, for the first time grasping this most basic concept their magic entailed.
“Indeed, though not all consequences are negative per se.”
The younger prince seemed to think for a moment, only to get up, suddenly looking rather bored.
“Hm, I’m not sure if I want to be a mage then. I’m gonna get some food.”
And with that, he was gone. Hans stared at the door, both caught off guard and somehow unsurprised that his half-brother would be so quick to give up for such a half-hearted reason.
Avril stifled a laugh but spoke no further of Lorens’ sudden departure.
“What a fool,” Hans mumbled to himself. “But maybe I’m the fool for expecting any different.”
“Well, to be honest, you didn’t exactly make magic sound exciting,” Avril said and promptly yawned. “Can’t you just show off a spell or two? That’d be much more fun than all that boring theory!”
Hans sighed and began returning all the books that were strewn around the room back to the shelf Lorens took them from.
“There are no spells, like you’d find them in fairy tales. The technique is always the same, just the will you manifest differs. Of course, the difficulty increases the more complex said will is, but—”
“Then show me that!” Avril interrupted him, her excitement rekindled. “Do you think I could learn it, too?”
Hans hesitated as he looked at Avril, who stood so close to him he thought he could feel the warmth of her smile. He averted his gaze, a soft blush on his face.
“W-well, if you have talent, it might very well be possible.”
The crown prince proceeded to explain the basic technique he spoke of and showed her an application of it that had no significant downsides: making a piece of paper float through the air. Upon completion of the spell, it would simply fall to the ground where it would remain for as long as it floated previously.
As simple as it was, Avril was delighted. Hans even made it fly in ornate patterns, which made her want to try it all the more. For a while that was all the two did, Avril concentrating on her will and the piece of paper she meant to free from gravity’s effect, while Hans observed, correcting her form and giving advice from time to time.
“There! I think it just moved!” Avril exclaimed excitedly, but what little distance the paper may have floated upwards became nothing again right that instant.
“Don’t let up your focus. A half-manifested will harbors unpredictable dangers!” Hans said, still deep in his instructor role.
They continued for a short while longer, but Avril could not repeat her earlier success.
“This is harder than I thought…” she grumbled as she sank down to take a break.
“Don’t fret, most magic novices need at least a month before they first see any kind of success,” Hans tried to comfort her. “Still, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but we really need to return the book! Dinner is only an hour away.”
“Alright, alright, just give me the book and I’ll put it back.”
Avril got up again to reach for the stolen tome, but Hans quickly grabbed it.
“Oh no, I’ll go with you. I won’t leave you on your own with this book again!”
“I can’t break into the library if I have to take you with me,” she retorted slightly irked that he still didn’t trust her. Though she couldn’t fault him either…
“Why not? How have you broken in, anyway?”
“Duh, I climbed in through the window,” Avril replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
At first Hans thought she was joking. But as she quietly looked on, it dawned on him she spoke the truth.
“Through the window?! Do you know how far up we are?”
Now it was Avril’s turn to look at him in disbelief.
“Yes? But if you don’t lock your windows, that’s still the easiest way inside.”
“Well, I will not risk my neck by clambering up the palace walls! We’ll have to sneak in through the door.”
“Fine, but don’t blame me if we get caught,” Avril relented and took Hans by the hand to lead him out of the room. Hans hardly managed to form even a single coherent thought until she let go again.
By the time they reached the library, most guards that Hans had sent to search for the thief had returned to their positions. They didn’t think twice about Hans entering the room or even about the book he was carrying, but going through the door to the forbidden section would be another story.
Hans led Avril to a part of the library where they were on their own to think of a plan.
“And if I try to distract them?” she suggested.
“That won’t work. They’re more alert than usual, so at least some would remain at the door.”
“Then I’m out of ideas. Why don’t you just use magic?”
By now Hans knew Avril well enough to realize she wasn’t joking, but the idea still seemed absurd to him.
“Magic? I may as well stab a knife into my leg right here and now. Who knows what may happen if I just willed this book back to its rightful place.”
Avril shrugged.
“I didn’t say to teleport it back, we could just turn ourselves invisible and walk right past the guards.”
Prince Hans drew breath to object, but as he thought about it, he had to admit that the idea wasn’t half-bad. He cleared his throat as he composed himself again and calmly replied.
“Very well, I still don’t like the risk, but we may as well try.”
He had never attempted to turn invisible before, but it shouldn’t pose any more problems than another form of transmutation. As he began to put a spell on them, Avril joined in, following through with what she had learned earlier. Whether it actually helped was hard to discern, but soon they were invisible! Even to each other.
“It worked!” Hans exclaimed, unable to hide his excitement at the success. “But I can’t see you, Prince Avril. M-may I hold your hand again? Just… to know where you are?”
He half expected her to laugh, but instead he felt her hand reaching out to him. The prince clumsily took it, and the two made their way to the door of the forbidden part of the library.
Hans’ heart was pounding as they sneaked past the guards, not just because of stress. To his relief, the spell held up, and they made it inside with no problem. Avril lead him to the shelf she had stolen the book from, and Hans quietly returned it.
“That wasn’t so difficult now, was it?” she whispered.
“N-no,” Hans replied, ever conscious of her hand in his. “Now let’s return before we’re visible again.”
No longer than it took to go back, were they invisible, and Hans let out a sigh of relief as they reappeared. Avril let go of his hand, and as disappointed as he was, he felt quite glad too because his own had started to become rather clammy.
“That was fun!” Avril said with her usual carefree smile that no longer irritated Hans.
“Indeed, it was,” he admitted truthfully. He couldn’t remember when last he felt so free of his princely burdens. “Now shall we get ready for dinner? I feel rather peckish.”
To that Avril agreed quite readily, and for the first time in hours, they parted ways to each go to their quarters.
For once, Hans wasn’t the first to arrive. It took him quite a while to pick out his outfit, since he wanted to impress. More than usual. He was only apart from Avril for a short while, but it made him realize something that had crept up on him the entire day. He felt drawn to this prince. Like he had never felt before. And even at the risk of sullying his reputation as a perfect crown prince, he wanted to confess to him just what he felt.
The hall was already filled with many royals, even more than earlier that day, since even the adults were present now. As he looked around hopefully, he couldn’t find who he was looking for. His heart ached a little as he strolled across the room, turning his head towards anything red he spotted. But it was never the prince he longed to see.
Just as he began to doubt if Avril was even there, he felt a gently tap on his shoulder. His hope renewed, he spun around and saw… a girl. In a dress more beautiful than he had ever seen. A girl with deep red hair and a smile he would never mistake for someone else's.
“P-prince… Avril?” he hesitantly asked.
“Princess. But otherwise, yes,” she said cheerfully.
Hans still couldn’t believe his eyes.
“B-but, earlier you were—”
“Wearing more practical clothes. It’s not that easy to climb in a dress, and I didn’t want all the princes to approach me during the tour.”
Prince Hans nervously swallowed. Just as he accepted having fallen in love with a boy, Avril sprung yet another surprise on him! But his feelings hadn’t changed. Unlike his assumptions of who he felt attracted to.
“So… have you no interest in being approached at all?” Hans asked and blushed further as he realized how transparent his question was.
Avril raised a brow but still appeared cheerful.
“What, you’ve seen me in a dress for just a minute and already feel the need to confess to me?”
“N-no! That need was there even before!” Hans blurted out and quickly looked around if anyone had overheard.
Avril laughed warmly.
“So it wasn’t my imagination then. I suppose I don’t mind if it’s you who expresses interest~”
The relief Prince Hans felt was immense. He once again composed himself and looked at Avril, who suddenly seemed even prettier than before. Hans could hardly tear his eyes from her. So much so that…
“Oh no,” he whispered as he realized. “Our spell from the library… I’m afraid it’s recoil just began.”
All across the room, the royals turned their heads to the stunning young couple. Even besides being good looking under normal circumstances, now they weren’t just visible, they were hyper-visible. No one in their vicinity could look away from them without considerable effort!
“My, then we better look deserving of all this attention,” Avril said, not fazed in the slightest, and linked her arm with that of Hans.
At first the prince felt a little self-conscious under everyone’s stares. But as the evening progressed, he rather relished them. Before long, the magic induced stares had faded but the two of them were still more than eye-catching.
“Why did you play all these tricks on me?” Hans asked when quiet had fallen over them for a short while.
“Hmm,” Avril replied thoughtfully. “You were just there. And I was curious if there was more to you than that boring, perfect prince you always try to look like.”
Hans appreciated her straightforwardness, but was a little disappointed that was all there was to it.
“I already told you, I have to act that way since I am the crown prince.”
“No, you don’t. I’m the crown princess of Poisson, and I’m doing just fine.”
Prince Hans gasped.
“You are what? And no one admonishes you for your mischief? Or your manners? Even dressing as a prince to fool other royals?”
The princess laughed once more, and the sound filled Hans with warmth.
“When you put it like that it sounds pretty bad, but I promise I can act the part when I have to! In fact, I work all the harder to fulfill my role if it means I can afford such freedoms in return,” she said and brushed a strand of hair out of her face, almost looking bashful for once. “You should try it too, all the pressure is easier to deal with if you allow yourself to just be free sometimes.”
Her words resonated deeply with Hans. It seemed like such a simple truth, but also one that is easy to overlook.
“I will,” he replied and took her hand into his. “If you show me how, I’ll gladly follow.”
#oc#ocs#Brassica#short story#original#april#fools#Hans#otome game#genderbend#shoujo#bisexaul#visual novel#Indiegame#indiedev#fantasy#magic#royals#this is canon
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