#i have a very specific alfred/tim and tim/jason brainworm based on a dckinkmeme prompt

[necrotic-nephilim]

Hear me out, dead dove alfred x dick

YES YOU GET IT. YOU SO GET IT.

i am *begging* for more Alfred inclusion in Batcest on my hands and knees. i'm a Tim/Alfred truther, but Dick/Alfred is so fun. there's always this default characterization in the Batfam that Alfred is good and this pillar of support and the Grandfather who everyone trusts and leans on. and that is boring to me. (also not really canon imo, Alfred condones and acts on a lot of shitty behavior-) but it's fun to play with as a subversion. when someone like Dick gets taken in by Bruce, he barely registers the kindly butler. and of course he bonds with Alfred eventually, but it's a wholesome bond. Dick will always be fighting with Bruce about something, which makes Alfred the respite. the one who helps with homework, stitches him up after patrol, talks to him about his problems, etc. so to make Alfred the more predatory, fucked up one? that's fun. it's fun bc Dick wouldn't *expect* it.

like. it'd start just small and slow enough that Dick is questioning if this is wrong or not. Alfred has seen him naked in just about every position to stitch those awkward to reach places, so if Alfred walks into Dick's room when he's naked or goes into the bathroom when he's showering well, it's a little weird but boundaries are weird in general for all of them. if Alfred's touch lingers when he's stitching up Dick, he positions Dick in compromising ways, well he's the medical expert and Dick trusts him.

and then when it tips over into overtly sexual it get so fun bc. it's not like Dick can tell Bruce. Alfred is basically Bruce's father and entire support system, Dick doesn't want to take that from him. and when Alfred touches him he uses all the grooming tactics. telling Dick he's mature for his age, he's not like other teenagers, he's so pretty, eh can be trusted with important things, all of it laid on thick. Dick's been canonically groomed, so it's clearly a tactic that works well on him, esp from someone he'd already trust like Alfred.

i just think that Alfred being so willing to agree with Bruce adopting all these teenagers he clearly has no emotional capacity to take care of. is something we could take advantage of in a dead dove way. a reasonable adult would object to this. but making Alfred groom them is fun. and like i said in my dom/sub headcanon post, i think for Alfred it's all a mental game. he's never going to "force" any one to do anything. he talks Dick into it. sure, Alfred can fight and he's not defenseless or frail, but he likes not *needing* to get physical or exert strength. bc if he talks Dick into it, then it's far more questionable if it "counts" as grooming, to Dick. bc Dick agreed to all of this and it's *Alfred*, he could've easily fought him off. it's a very fun mind game and to me, the most fun part about including Alfred in Batcest as the morally questionable one.