#i hate. being an age regressor. it's not like i got a fucking choice. but i do have a choice on how i react to other people's activities.

[kerosene-saint]

I wish people didn't act like dd/lg or abdl were like pedophilia. not even into it and I'm a sfw age regressor (non community due to this problem) but like. ugh. and the problem is my views on it have changed so much over just this year. because guess what. whatever people do in their free time surrounding sex, as long as it is not genuinely illegal, should not fucking matter to you. it is not your fucking business to tell people you think their kink is gross and pedophilic, especially because it's not pedophilia. it is fine. to be uncomfortable with a kink page of a certain kind interacting with you. I get it. and there are some pretty mean people in those communities but guess what? there are mean people in EVERY COMMUNITY. and you do not have to relate that kink to pedophilia to say you'd prefer their kink blogs to not interact with whatever blog you have. but when you say shit like "pedos and also people into ddlg and abdl dni" it's annoying. you could say "ddlg/abdl blogs dni" absolutely fair. but saying don't interact abt an entire group of people of which you do not necessarily have the means of checking everyone for being in that community??? alright then. you have fun in puppy play isn't anything like fucking dogs but ddlg is like fucking children world.

[royal-dread]

Why I, a former age regressor, do not support age regression as it is shown in media

On social media there’s this video that’s going around of an age regressor that I’ve had many issues with. If you go in the comments of these posts you’ll have three types of people: the ones who make fun of it, the ones who try to defend it, and the ones that tell the ones who defend it how harmful these actions are.

In all of these posts, you know what I find? People who say “it’s a trauma response” “most people don’t have control over it” and yet also say “it’s a coping mechanism and dressing up is soothing” despite that being a completely different thing, and will go on about how “doctors recommend it” despite that making no sense

Let me clear one thing up: dressing up in baby clothing, coloring in coloring books, drinking out of sippy cups are all dress up games.

ACTUAL age regression is your body doing childlike things or sending yourself into a child like state to better handle your trauma

Let’s take me for example. I naturally did it from actual trauma. When I was about 6 mo, my mom stopped me from sucking on my fingers. But I was raised in a very abusive household and you know what I did? As I turned 2yo I started sucking on my fingers again and every night I slept with my baby blanket(the blanket that came with my crib). I would suck on my fingers originally at night, but then it got worse to the point where I was constantly doing it.

I didn’t stop doing this until I was 17 (last summer). I would wear long sleeves and hide my hand in it while I did it at school because I was constantly stressed out. You know how when you take away a baby’s binky, It’ll start crying and getting fussy or even throw a tantrum? That’s what I did. If we were doing a lot of activities that required your hands I would get overwhelmed and start to cry because I couldn’t calm down and the emotions over flooded my brain. You couldn’t hold a conversation with me because when this happened I would snap at others and say hateful things.

And not only this, but when this happened my mind would “shut down” as we said, and I couldn’t think. I couldn’t form any coherent thoughts because all I could think of was how I was feeling. There was no reasoning with me, all I could think of was me wanting to soothe myself, I couldn’t do my work, I couldn’t have long conversations with people, etc. I couldn’t tell people when there was something wrong, I would just sit there and cry because that’s all I could handle.

Now note: there was no dress up. There was no “coloring” or drinking out of sippy cups. These were habits that I had when I was young that I started again because my brain couldn’t handle the trauma.

Now, I recently went through tf-cbt (trauma focused- cognitive behavioral therapy) where I was told these were horrible habits to do and I should steer far away from them. My counselor told me that it was a clear sign of child abuse/child trauma and I had PTSD, and helped me get the diagnosis for places like school and work. She told me that age regression is a defense mechanism that your body takes so that you can handle what’s going on around you. Your body and mind regresses to points where you were at your calmest and use those habits/actions to give you a better control on yourself, but they make you unstable when you can’t do these actions and you end up doing way more harm to yourself than good.

Not only this but my habit deformed my mouth severely. I finally got approved for braces and when they did the X-rays and measured everything they told me I had about an INCH of space between by bottom and top row of teeth. I couldn’t eat in public because I had to bite with the side of my mouth. I couldn’t form words properly and constantly fumbled. It was embarrassing how awful they were and I ended up having the teeth behind my canines pulled because there wasn’t enough room to pull everything back. 2.5 years later and I’m STILL in braces because of how hard it is to fix this. And my middle and index finger are deformed too, they’re bent at awkward angles and I can’t hold them straight because of the 15 years of constantly being pushed that way.

Age regression is now a TRIGGER for me because it gets my blood pumping and makes me feel sick and I get so unreasonably angry at these people for not even knowing what they’re talking about. My head gets light and I can feel all the blood rush from it and I feel like I’m gonna fall over if I stand because of how many times I’ve tried to explain to people my situation and they’ve told me “fuck off if you don’t actually age regress or are a little youre an ableist fuck and there’s a special place in hell for people like you” when I’m the one who has an actual PTSD diagnosis and has gone through the whole speal of getting help.

Age regression is not okay. It’s not heathy. Your mind can’t properly handle the things that are going on around you and it shuts down and brings you back into a state of mind that your body knows it can handle. It’s unhealthy because you never actually face what’s going on and the issues only build and build until you burst because everything has been suppressed, not coped with. These habits can destroy your life and you can lose all your relationships (like with me) due to it.

If you “age regress” because it’s FUN you’re just playing dress up and are MOCKING people with an actual issue. Go fuck yourself if you really think that, because that’s like me saying “oh I pretend to have war flash backs because I think being a soldier is cool”

So for those of you who support this and say doctors recommend it: you’re lying. You’re literally lying right to our faces and are trying to justify you having playtime and not wanting to grow up when there’s actual people who do this because of trauma and get suppressed because they’re “not real agere. I HATE the term “little” because it’s making a FOOL of me, I’m not a “little”, I didn’t age regress because I had a choice, it was my body’s way of coping and it was HORRIBLE, and the way that media has made it into “oh yes look at this decorative binky I got and this new children’s coloring book” sickens me.

So yeah, I have a DNI. And that DNI says “age regressors” because I’m sick and tired of being grouped in a category of people who are using the term wrong and take away from people who do this because of actual issues in their life

[fuwaprince]

Fuwa fuwa... I tried to join a community for age regressors that's new and cute and I got rejected because I'm "not safe" just because I don't have DNI rules And I'm so upset over it? Like I really shouldn't be because whatever their loss on not having me but I guess I just hate being told I'm not safe because of what OTHERS put on their blogs... I'm just really sad about it and need d to vent I love you and I hope everything is okay with you

Well jeez that’s not very nice.. I understand why people wouldn’t want to be associated with certain things and the whole “if you’re not against it, you’re for it!” mentality they might have is totally understandable too, but to say that you yourself aren’t safe for welcoming everyone who needs a safe place to stay is kind of mean. Like.. they’re trying to enforce a “___ is bad and if you aren’t outwardly expressing your intolerance for ____ and constantly shouting at ___ then you’re obviously for it and unsafe!” mindset if that makes sense… it’s not very supportive and open minded at all. I used to have a “anyone can follow as long you aren’t being disrespectful and bitter” attitude until I accepted some things are simply too uncomfortable for me to be exposed to regularly. But just because I didn’t mind if someone who disgrees with me on some views followed me doesn’t make me unsafe (the same way it doesn’t make you unsafe). Everyone deserves to have a safe place and if you’re willing to be the person who overlooks their “flaws” or differences to provide them that, I think it makes you such a strong person. It takes a certain kind of person to love people unconditionally. It’s incredible and admirable and I’m so sorry for anyone who thinks that your unconditional love for others is somehow unsafe or toxic.

A comforting thought that I live by is something I’ve learned at burning man actually! It’s called radical inclusion! So basically you’re supposed to live your life learning to accept and include people of all kinds in your love. No matter what things they participate in or are born like, you have to condition yourself to see them as a person first and foremost and choose not to abandon or exclude them because of their life choices. Everyone deserves love and a helping hand and for you to be one of the few people to be like “hey! I don’t care what you’ve done in the past, you matter to me, I forgive you. I love you. This place is also your home” is so fucking sweet. Of course, not everyone can live their life 100% by this rule. I find it difficult sometimes too ; ^ ; But it’s a nice rule and if others don’t like that you live by it, it really is their loss. Because you are safe. You haven’t done anything wrong at all and honestly you’re one of my favorite age regressors on here because you make everyone feel welcomed. I think you know deep down when someone is genuinely going out of their way to hurt others and to avoid that, but people who are struggling with their identities are another thing and it isn’t bad to stand by them while they figure themselves out. 

Thanks for making sure everyone following you is safe and supported, not just the followers whose views match yours 100%. You’re helping a lot more people by opening your arms to them than by gatekeeping them. I love you. If things ever get too uncomfy though, just know you can ALWAYS set limitations. Limitations aren’t a bad thing when they’re made to protect you. Your blog should also be a safe place for yourself too, never forget that!

Also, teenietots is a community I think you would fit best in. I don’t know many communities at all honestly but I’ve heard teenietots are nonsexual age regressors and all the ones I know are very very friendly and welcoming. Best of luck!