#i hate myself apparantly

[suau-projectmatriarch]

Imma make ya'll mfs cry with me in the next chapter again I swear to god-

[redrocketpanda]

Finally caught up with the final two episodes of bluelock S1 and yooooooooooooooo WHATTTTTTTT

Here's a random thought round up no one asked for:

The fucking SCENES between Isagi and Bachira. JFC guys

Isagi "I'm obsessed with devouring Bachira/I'll steal you back" Yoichi and Bachira "you found me/you're the guy I want" Meguru

Absolutely cackling at how obsessed all the boys are with Isagi, including Rin

The hilarity of Barou, Nagi and Chigiri being like... fucking whatever Isagi and then immediately getting depressed over their soccer wife not being there for them anymore. Ohhhh he's not here to do the laundry (Barou), ohhhh he's not here to help look after my body (Chigiri), ohhhhhhhh he's not here to wake me up gently and take me to breakfast (Nagi)

I couldn't even enjoy the reality check the World Five match gives them bc English speaking players were just so cringe noooooo and the whole match just ended up being cringe

The WHIPLASH in my heart of Raichi falling through the fucking door but Kunigami not being there *sobbing* I feel like BL is teasing me tho, Kunigami's coming back right???

Meeting the new players and trying to recognise names I've seen people talking about

Nagi seeing Reo againnnnnn

But also now season 1 is finished???? And I'll have to wait like a year for the next season???? (Yea I'm gonna read the manga but I love the animeeeee)

Anyway, I'm just so hyped i started watching bluelock bc of tumblr and now I'm fucking obsessed with it

[violentviolette]

your neck is the size of her thighs bc she is skinny and you are fat

yes anon, good job. that was not at all completely obvious because i stated it point blank and so this was so helpful. my neck, my stomache, and my thighs are fat as fuck and my wifes skinny thighs look amazing wrapped around my fat ass neck when shes riding my face

great work understanding english! im sure u'll be fluent in no time. next lets see if u can correctly repeat back what my hair color is

[ursemma]

"I'll always love you" pt 3

Pt 1, pt 2, pt 4

Mattheo Riddle × F!reader

Theodore nott × F!reader (ex)

Warning: none

Summary: After going on few dates with Mattheo, you couldn't help but wonder what you two are since you haven't made things offical, what happens when one of your friend invites you to her wedding, and apparantly you've to face your ex with his wife, and you desperately need a date.

Mattheo and I have gone to few dates, fucked and behaved like a couple for few months, but things between us have never been official, and I don't want to ruin what's between us by asking 'what are we?'.

I was laying on my bed wondering what i felt for him, this was far way different than what I had with Theodore.

Theodore and I were..... Something I can't describe in words, not in a good way, we used to fight alot.

We used to fight and never solve things hoping it would go away and we'd be back to normal, it wasn't healthy at all.

We never used to communicate which would lead us to misunderstandings. Something which caused our break-up.

I had butterflies but in a bad way, in a way which would tell you something bad is about to happen.

But Mattheo, him and I are mythic.

We sure fight but they aren't the heated ones, the ones which makes your heartbeat fast and tears flow, the ones which you hate and want to runaway from. Our fights are more like "hey I wanted that icecream!" Or "huh you bet?". We fight like kids, over small things but in a teasing way.

And my inner child feels safe with him. It's like he's healing a part of me.

I was deep in my thoughts, and suddenly my phone rang. I looked over to see the name 'torie!' i smiled at myself before picking up the call, and I heard her voice.

Torie!:

"heyyy babyy"

Me:

Hey Astoria!!

Torie!:

Soo Draco and I, we're getting married!!!

Me:

Congratulations!!

Torie!:

Thankyouu love! I want you to attend the wedding, not only that I want you here for the preparations as well, I'll send you the address and you have to come I won't take no for answer okayyy byeee!!!!

Before I could protest she hung up and sent me the address. I sighed knowingly that Theodore and Daphne would be there, I wasn't affected by their presence at all, not after meeting Mattheo, but the fact that it would be very awkward if I went without a date was eating me up.

I looked at my screen and my finger hovered above the name 'matty~', I sighed and texted him,

Me: Hey Mattheo!

Matty~: Hey what's up??

Me: I need a favour

Matty~: go ahead, I'll be glad to help you out

Me: soo my friend is getting married and Theodore is going to be there so I need a boyfriend, to make sure it won't be awkward.

Matty~: soo...?

Me: would you be my boyfriend?? Like a fake one?? You know just for the preparations and wedding?? Like you're the only person I'm comfortable with soo?? Please please I'll do anything you want just say yes.

Matty~: okay fine. You owe me tho.

Me: yes yes thankyouu. We have to leave for the preparation day after tomorrow, at 5 pm, the wedding is in London, we've to catch a flight.

Matty~: I'll be there ;)

Me: thankyouu ily ;)

Matty~: anything for you, ily too ;)

I sighed while smiling like an idiots, I booked our flights and started to pack my bags and everything necessary.

Me and Mattheo arrived at Draco's Mansion where we all were staying in, only two days were left for the wedding, 1 and half to be exact.

"Y/n/n welcome!!!" Tori greeted me as she engulfed me into a hug.

She pulled away after 10 sec and looked over my shoulder "and whose he?" She asked me into confusion and before I could answer "I'm Mattheo Riddle, her boyfriend, nice to meet you Astoria" he said while sliding a hand on my waist and pulling me closer to him.

I looked at him with a smile on my face and Astoria smirked at me before saying "nice to meet you too Mattheo, your room is upstairs, please make yourself home" we thanked her before going in our room.

I freshened up and I was laying on my bed while Mattheo was taking a bath, so far we didn't saw Theodore at all for which I was thankful for.

A knock on the door disturbed me from reading my book. I went to check who it was and saw a familiar face, "Theodore?" "Y/n" before I could say anything Mattheo came out of bathroom, with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist and interrupted us "darling whose there?" Before standing beside me.

I know this is short and I'm leaving you hanging but I'll post next part before the week ends and trust me it'll be long!!!

The next part would be the last one and it'll be uploaded shortly.

Tags

@hoeforvinniehackerrr @shartnart1

(if you wanna be tagged in next part make sure to comment!!)

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[singingcicadas]

The delightful enigma that's idw Soundwave - I feel like he's a hopeless nose of wax who exists in a constant pendulum-like state getting pulled in whichever direction his various bosses wants to go because everything he does - all his beliefs and actions and all the "freedom and equality" stuff he waxes poetic about - is so inherently contradictory that it's insane.

He'll say stuff like this:

And then also stuff like this:

What even is his definition of equality? Everyone above myself should be equal (except megatron ofc), everyone below myself should know their place?

This is him:

And this is also him:

While the order he gave Ravage on the Lost Light is:

(So much for loyalty lol, it only applies to Megatron)

He says he wants peace (i.e. the thing Megatron surrendered to achieve and the thing he hates Megatron for):

But apparantly peace doesn't apply to making peace with the Autobots and he just wants to continue the Autobot-Decepticon war with Earth as a resource base so what even is the difference:

He says this:

But then he follows Galvatron (yes he knows Galvatron was behind the Deceptigod thing that screwed them over):

Who does this:

And Soundwave's just like whoa calm down not now

Through the ex-rid issues he makes like five different proclaimations about what the Decepticon cause is. Really conflicting guy with constant 180 turnarounds, whose only consistent worldview can probably be boiled down to this one line👇

[gaslybottoms]

tagged by my one and only @leclercenjoyer

passing it onto @celientjeee @landoom @espithewarlock and anyone else who wants to

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

in total, 53

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

360,128 and most of it was written this year

3. What fandoms do you write for?

currently only f1

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The New Normal - got possessed by the spirit of landoscar

Ride Me Like an Elevator - probably my most profitable MCYT fic that was based on a shitpost

Party for Two - meme fic that turned into something that i wasn't expecting

Sleep Comes to Those Who Wait - huge fluff piece for the Hades video game when I had severe brainrot

The Pounding of a Drum(mer) - I dont have an explanation for this

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do, but usually after 5-10 business days because I look at them and then I forget they're there.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I dont think any of my fics have angsty endings. feel free to prove me wrong, but i just... im a sucker for resolution and happy endings

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

literally every single one. the one i'm most proud of? Live, Laugh, Lando because I made myself cry several times writing the last few chapters because I was just so proud of myself

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i havent seen any but sometimes people need to remember public bookmarks are visible to the author

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do (regretfuly). what do you MEAN what kind. sometimes tender, sometimes a bit harder, im not good at smut so like.. you tell me

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know about

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

i have not to my knowledge

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope, and i think i would be a nightmare to work with but i would be open to it!

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

hahahahahahahahahahaha.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

maxiel married in vegas. i wrote 23k words and abandoned it earlier this year.

16. What are your writing strengths?

fluff. 100%. also apparantly my characterisation? this is probably because i am terminally onine and i consume SO MUCH content that like... i could talk about certain drivers in my sleep

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

smut. i find it so difficult to focus, to get into, to remember the positioning. apparently sometimes its good but god at what cost.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i have included it a couple of times, but always with a direct translation within reach. i will not write entire conversations in french, or whatever, and have actively stopped reading fics where there has been no translation supplied. and i only use it for emphasis, or if it calls for a joke.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

sigh. theres two answers to this. the first fandom i wrote for was WWE self insert. the first fandom i POSTED for was jonas brothers

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

LLL, hands down. its not my best performing fic, and its very niche but like. i did that. 53k words thereabouts, and i got through it.

[csvent-2]

i suppose it's the nature of chowlings as a concept, but some of them seriously disturb me. especially since its a cs that permits minors to play (because its a "game" to saunt now 🙄) the themes should be handled with much more care. i find myself running into; purposeful prolapse designs, disease/parasite, genitals, body fluids, fetus/unborn baby, dangerous, unsafe object/food/nonfood, horrifyingly gorey and mutilated chows... additionally the design by the contest winner didn't even have their chowling authenticated on the ml! atrocious and haunting themes are welcome but fuck lavender lemonade specifically for some reason. apparantly that one doesn't deserve cents of bandwidth? like plz make it make sense? its's so toxic and mean spirited. obviously the user didn't have the opportunity to contact saunt to pay the exorbitant price for the myo and im seriously disheartened by the unfairness of it. it's a slap in the face how saunt can be so hateful, dismissive, and foster such an inhospitable community. and then turn their back on it for making it that way, rather than take steps to repair the situation. they have no kindness in their heart for their supporters.

Wow.

[tetsunabouquet]

Can't Help Falling In Love With You Chapter 19

A/N: Trigger warnings: mentions of homophobia. Masterpost

You were glad to be home, and jumped into your bed. You groaned into your pillow, hoping your mother wouldn't be too angry with you skipping school. Ichijo, who had been staying home because of how sick he had gotten from the alcohol yesterday opened the door of your room sluggishly and sat down on your bed. "You're home early." Ichijo remarked, looking at your ceiling. "Well, Shoto is a dick." "What did he do?" Ichijo asked, sighing because he knew that little shit and knew you hadn't come running home without a reason. You groaned once more into your pillow, really not being in the mood to say what was on your mind, but you knew you had to be honest either way because Ichijo would otherwise tell on your mom and make the situation even worse. Damn it. "He apparantly spilled to the entire school that you are staying with me and made it seem like I am cheating on Midorima with you." Ichijo choked on his own saliva and you looked up, seeing him nearly falling off your bed looking absolutely shocked and disgusted. "He did what?!" You groaned, pretending you had just died from misery. Ichijo gritted his teeth and punched one of your old stuffed animals. "Not Mr Pengu!" "I'm sorry, but I just hate this. Why does everyone always have to assume a boy and a girl being friends means something more?!" You sat up, shrugging. "I don't know, I suppose that's part of heteronormative society. Like the old ladies who ask me about my love life and if I managed to find myself a high school sweetheart yet." "I hate those. Can't the hags just find better things to do then nose around in other people's lovelives?" You chuckled and looked at Mr Pengu, "You know, I hoped people stopped gossiping about that when I started dating Midorima. I know it upsets you too." It was a sensitive topic you seldomly brought up because Ichijo was still uncomfortably in the closet, but you wouldn't rush him or push him into conversing about it. Ichijo pursed his lips, nodding. "Sometimes I thought it would be easier to pretend like we were, but it just wouldn't be fair to you. You deserve a boyfriend that actually makes you happy, like Midorima does." You smiled kindly at him, hoping Midorima wasn't overtly worried about you skipping school. You hoped there weren't any students bullying him. You really hoped Midorima's desk wasn't all scribbled over like yours was. "You know that you'll always have a place to stay here, don't you? My mom accepts you for who you are and you are like a brother to me. I'd never think less of you." Ichijo wrapped his arms around you. "If I had an awesome little sister, I'm sure she'd be you." You grinned into the hug, sighing into warmth. "I really am not looking forward to going back to school. I wish I could skip the rest of the month until everything dies down, but I fear that would bring out the opposite reaction." He ruffled your hair and said, "Don't let Shoto get to you or bring ruin to your relationship. You deserve to be happy. I wish I could get you something to drink, but your mom has cleared out all the booze after I ransacked the cabinet yesterday." You rolled your eyes. "Do you really want to go to the hospital for alcohol poisoning?" "Can you for once not be the girl who fishes me out of trouble?" "Only until you've found a boyfriend who fusses over you." Ichijo snorted and just then you heard your phone with a text message from Midorima.

I couldn't find you during lunch and a certain unpleasant ex-friend of yours was saying that you left the school premise nandayo. Please let's talk through this okay. I love you- Shintaro. Hmph. You could not decide wether its annoying or adorable how Midorima has your back, but it warmed you and that was the most important thing.

[always-me-meha]

Random shit update lol or me just thinking as usual haha

Hrmmmm do I think he's comfortable being honest about things in his past or in general??? Ehhh idk..... he's getting there, slowly opens up to things and I'll sit and listen. But but I do KNOW he can be a wicked liar, I'm not sure he does it on purpose now or its just a natural response. I just hope that bum works on it or stays honest with me at least lol I hate liars.

So yesssss when I hear shit from other people it has me question, do you deserve me? Am i stoopid? Or you gonna do what you've done to other girls (if what was said even true, the girl that told me things is a crackhead and apparantly a hoe that spreads rumours is what this other girl told me, he even told me this to before). But I still don't think he was ever honest about sleeping with this other chick or not before we started dating but were still together. I have no proof so I have to let it go I guess eh?

We're finally dating, time to just focus on the now and not the confusing as hell past 4 months lol like yes I probably shouldn't of waited and stuck around as long as I did but I did get away from him eventually!!!! which is how we were apart for a whole month. Enough time for us to miss eachother plenty and make him clue in if it was worth losing me LOL

If I didn't fuck up and went to town to gamble that day and bumped into dee, we probably still wouldn't be talking honestly. Crazy hmmmm like a butterfly effect hahaha

And I know i know I went crazy blasting him the other night but man I was high and pissed off at him and didn't see his point in the things he was telling me or mad about cause of course i was in la la land. Also I'm someone who once she's pissed off and wants answers or to resolve things, I want it now! I don't have patience at alllllllll. Where I know guys need their space to calm down, and I tend to keep pushing. I did finally let him go to sleep cause he was right, we both needed to calm down.

I'm proud we didn't block eachother through all that haha. Told him when he asked me out I didn't wanna do the blocking game!!!!!

But being I didn't sleep all night I was still pissed off of course haha so I messaged 'so it's tomorrow.....' and he was like not rn I got bad news (his friend passed)..... I was a CUNT, I was like I don't give a fuck I'm done!!!!! Idk if he was like wow, running away again, I said I wasn't running away I'm standing up for myself cause he treats me poorly. He right away said he was sorry and for me to come over. Also I said I was struggling to hearing shit, so he wanted to make sure I bloody napped!!!!! And I did wanna support him of course I said I was sorry he lost his friend. I felt like shit for flipping out but damn. There's usually always something that happend just as I'm like trying to leave or when I did leave.

Anywhooooo, we made up and had a good time together, stayed sober all day, he tried to get me to sleep but I wouldn't lol I did eat! So that was something at least. He talked and explained things to me more why he doesn't want me hanging with dee or being at that house. I totally understand it all!!!!!! He was right about everything, even my councilor today says for once she agrees with him, stay away from there.

So that's a professional and him advising me. I will for now on listen to that! Besides I don't know what things I said that day that may come to bite me in the ass too -.- and all the druggies in town are starting to know my name and vehicle, police I belive now recognize my vehicle. Shits just dangerous. Me driving high is not okay. Me evem giving rides to the store is not okay cause I'm still an acomplice even if I think I'm being safe and not involved by staying in my car.

Just shits been I guess more crazy since I started hanging with her even tho it's been only twice. Because it's me making these decisions on my own, not him. Yeah maybe I learned stuff and met them cause of him but I'm chosing to make these bad decisions on my own even after being told to never hang with them without him. Even after the last time I promised I wouldn't and I did it anyway. Simply cause I was mad n wanted a hoot. See my own attitude problems gonna get me in shit smh.

So yes this is why he wants to stop so I will stop smoking too. Today was another slip. Without going on to more blah blah blah, he was given stuff last night when looking for someone. Being a nice honest guy said it was on the desk (smh which right away triggered me to wanting a hoot and trying not to be mad at him for even telling me it was there lol see it's like, I'm like don't lie to me!!!!! Then right there in my head was like why you tell me that, shouldve lied and hid it!!!!!!!!) But no I glad he was honest..... just I was slightly disappointed cause I was excited and confident about us not smoking today bleh. It wasn't on my mind at all till I heard it was there.

[lucigoo]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you so much for the tag @sunnyrosewritesstuff. This looks so much fun and agreat way for us to share our fics!

1. How many works do you have on A03? i currently have 120 fics

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 443,720 (not bad considering i've not quite been writing fanfic for a year I dont think)

3. What fandoms do you write for? The Hobbit (Mostly Bagginshield) and Harry Potter (Mostly Wolfstar)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Stop me Fading- The Hobbit (it needs serious reediting, just an FYI), Defying Death (or at least the ones in charge) - The Hobbit, Who's is the tie Harry? - Harry Potter, Breeding my B....  - Harry Potter (pure Wolfstar smut) and I'm coming Petite Étoile - Harry Potter

5. Do you respond to comments? I do. I tend to to wait until I have 25+ otherwise I feel a bit overwhelmed doing it every time they come in, or letting them get so many that I can't bring myself to do it. So I will anwer, just bare with me <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ummm .... I have a fair few ....

Bagignshield wise would be The Demented King Under the Mountain Check the tags because thers NO HEA for anyone. Harry Potter wise, again I have a fair few with MCD, but I think the most emotional one for me is It's over, they're all gone , again mind the tags

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Most of my fics have some form of Happy Ending, or it implies they do. As for the happiest, hmmm....

Bagginshield wise id say Changeling Child Harry Potter wise, i'd say this little series (two short fics), it just hiits all my fav tropes lol. - I finally have a family and they are all here

8. Do you get hate on fics? Only ever on the Wolfstar ones. Apparantly Remus shouldnt have been taller then his little Welsh mum, someone was VERY upset about it lol.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I don't usually. I have 2 smut fics and one the was supposed to be smut, but ended up being fade to black (opps lol)

Breeding my B.... (Pure Wolfstar P without P), Are you a werewolf? (Jegulus P with P) and Wait, you're the wolf? (Is implied Wolfstar smutt but the smutt wasn't smutting that day lol)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I actually have one atm as a wip on A03. Its a Hobbit/HArry Potter crossover and im very excited for it. I want you right here, where you belong:Home with us

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? I have, its linked on my "Breed my B...." fic. A wonderful person translated it ito Russian

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I have not. I would love to though

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? It really is a tie betwee Bagginshield and Wolfstar, I adore both

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? So, i dont tend to not fiish wips, they just stay in my computer for a long time lol. One i am slowly (like snails pace slowly) working on is called King of Azkaban and it's a pretty dark fic.

16. What are your writing strengths? I feel like i can put the characters in any situaiton and try keep thempretty close to their canon characterisations within the sitution

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Editing!! I have a paid editing app and also run things through a TTS and there are still so many bloody typos 😭

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Do it!! If oyu can get someone from that language to help (of it's a real one). I oftne use Romani chib (I'm Roma) inmy Bagigshield focs for the hobbits and have Kuzdhul and Sinderian in there too. I also have a Wolfstar fic where I have English, Welsh, French and Punjabi in it.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Were talking over 20 years ago here, but it was Wolfstar then and it's Wolfstar now lol.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? I dont know 😭. Im going to put two Bagignshield ones and two Harry Potter ones as I don't have a favourite but ones I like more then others.

Heather (Wolfstar), You're Floo Was My Emergency Contact (This is my latest HP one and im so proud of it ) A heart of stone and Fire in his soul (Pre Bagginshield but this one felt so powerful to me, Defying Death (or at least the ones in charge) (Bagginshield Afterlife fic, soo pure gold to me)

I'm gonna tag @brandileigh2003, @blueberryrock @fishing4stars, @chaoticfandomtrash And of course anyone and everyone who wants to join and share their fics. Id love a tag if you want so I can admire all the fics!!!

[coppeliafoxworth]

February 1st 2023

Yesterday and today were pretty slow.

Yesterday at work, me and my coworker (Andrew) had to replace an entire rooms worth of fiberglass ceiling tiles.  I think anyone who has dealt with fiberglass before can tell you this but, I. Hate. Fiberglass.

It's itchy, it gets stuck to everything, it burns, it's flaky, and for some reason it will be the strongest thing when you don't want it to be and yet the weakest thing when you want it to be strong.  

After replacing all the ceiling tiles, we split up as we were sent on small trivial tasks.

Once I clocked out I headed straight to Walmart.  My mother is planning on re-decorating the entire house and I took the oppurtuntiy to change up my room as well.  One of the things I'm changing is getting rid of my bulky dresser and instead putting small plastic ones in my closet.  I bought two plastic dressers at Walmart and then made my way home.

Once I was home, I immediately took a shower and changed my clothes to get rid of the fiberglass.  Thankfully it worked and I was able to go to dinner comfortably.

For dinner I took me and my lover to Red Lobster since during my last paycheck I was extrememly tight on cash and my lover ended up paying for when we ate out.  All in all it was a delicious meal.  The only thing I would change would maybe be the waitress we had.

I don't want to sound like a Karen, but she was pretty rude.  I ordered a pretty big meal so when asked what two sides I wanted I just asked for two orders of fries.  My lover ordered no fries for his sides.

When the waitress delivered our food I had one order of fries on my plate and another plate with fries on it.  She put the other plate by my lover.  No big deal, it was a lot of food so I reached over for them and she told me as if I was a child,

"YOUR fries are on YOUR plate."

That pissed me off to the point of debating whether or not to purge on her shoes right in front of her.  Obviously I didn't but the thought was most certainly there.

By the time we both got home we were ready to pass out into a food coma, in other words, I slept amazingly.

Today at work we didn't do much, in fact, we did even less than yesterday.  

The day started off with having to replace a drain in a hallway.  After a bit of fussing with the screws we were finally able to secure the drain plate.  Afterwards we had to redo one of the ceiling tiles in the conference room we replaced yesterday.  They didn't like how the emergency sprinkler head showed through the tile so we had to fix it.

After that we didn't really do anything besides replace a phone.

During my last entry I mentioned my father giving me unsolicited advice about work and saying that I was going to take it.  Well, I changed my mind.  I just don't feel like having a job that makes me think, "what if I just killed myself right here right now" constantly is healthy.  I've been applying to more places.

I thought I had some luck when I was mesaged on my phone for an interview with an insurance firm through Zoom.  I gave the number the email to my Zoom account and was immediately asked if I was ready.  

This interview was supposed to be a messaging interview, not a video call.  I told them the hours of my lunch break and an hour after I got off from work were the best times for me.  Well, they completely ignored what I said and asked almost every ten minutes if I was ready for an interview.  Eventually I caved in as, the work day was slow.  They asked if I've ever worked remotely and I said, "No."

Apparantly, answering with a simple yes or no to a simple yes or no question wasn't the correct answer and in response, the interviewer decided to explain how an interview works to me.  I told them that I understand and half an hour later is when we finally start the interview back up.  

At one point they asked to see my driver's license along with a selfie of me for verification.  Keep in mind that I already told them I am at work, they know I can't go get my license.  I told them again the hours I was available and why.  They didn't respond.

Since I didn't receive a reply, I asked why they needed my license in the first place since this was just an interview.  All the responded with was that they needed it for a background check and that I needed to send a photo.

The part that really messed me up was how they decided to end the response, "Understand?"

It pissed me off that this recruiter was this fucked up.  I told them, 

"No, I do not understand why you are talking to me like I'm a child.  I wish to withdrawal my application if this is the way you speak to your employees or coworkers.  Thank you and have a nice day.

Once I got home, I changed and immediately called my lover.  I decided to go to his house and we enjoyed the other's company.

[romanticizedwriter]

Do not presume to know my emotions

You cannot fathom the depth of which I feel

You, who knows only of anger and intolerance,

cannot begin to imagine that which consumes my mind

You say I am angry but

you have not even come close to experiencing my wrath

I am not angry, no

I am exasperated by men like you who think

they can see into my mind and

know what lurks beneath the surface

How can you, who has never come close

to the wide spectrum of emotions and thoughts that plague me,

even begin to decipher what I feel, what I think?

Even I do not have the knowledge of all that lives inside my mind

So tell me, man, how do you know me better than myself?

[psalmsofpsychosis]

how to successfully release your soul from this mortal coil and enter hell straight from satan's penthouse on the 7th floor:

1. Finish a bag of spicy cheetos

2. Pop 3 eucalyptus candies immediately after the first mistake

[queersouthasian]

I have to write this down (this is not about BLs), because i am so tired of people, so fucking tired.

The idea of certain Girl Group stans that the world revolves around apparent sexism against their favourite is a hilarious idea (i am a woman myself), the fact that these are the same people who tear down other girl group stans and have the absolute audacity to comment on any boy group member they don't follow. I seriously don't understand in which world y'all live cause in your world everything wrong is going on with your fav. How many times did a male idol got hate?? Many. How many times did a male idol get cancelled for having a family?? Many. If your fav idol is doing something apparantly cringe or wrong and happens to be a gg member suddenly it's "sexism"??? This is not me denying sexism but really??in everything??? Y'all drag male idols so much for legit anything and then end up with what??"female idols have it worse"?? I am so tired of "male idols are lucky that they have these simps" comments and the utter disrespect and degrading these artist to just their body and face when half of them feel blood in their throat because of the heavy choreography...i am so tired of people going on with the childish, "you are a female and stan men omg you are a fetishizer/simp/misogynist", the fact that they think no one simps over the female idols is ridiculously hilarious in itself...

[ladycatofwinterfell]

83

83. “You can’t just hang out by that grave all day, you know.”

Have fun :)

Catelyn would never get used to the eerie silence that swept through the graveyard during winter. Once spring came two winters would have passed since it happened in and she visited the grave often, but still it never got better. There were no people there during winters, it was like everyone suddenly no longer cared about their dead as soon as the ground froze. But that wouldn’t keep her away.

She slowed down a little when she saw the grave she was heading towards. The gravestone was swept into a blanket of fresh snow that covered the name on it and the ground before it.

She reached out and brushed off the snow. The cold made her hands sting, she should have worn gloves. She could almost hear him telling her that. Had he been there he would have teased her for it and then rubbed warmth into her hands before giving her his gloves. “I’m fine” he would have told her, “Starks are made for cold”.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Ned” she said.

Of course there was no answer. She had not expected one, but still it hurt a little bit. It would always hurt a bit. In the beginning it had hurt greatly, but time had healed that wound a bit even though it would never heal it fully. She would never hear his voice again.

She kneeled in the snow, not caring about that she would get wet and cold. She took out a candle from her bag and made a little clearing in the snow. She put the candle there and then she lit it. Just a little bit of warmth. It wasn’t enough, it was much less than he deserved. Had he been alive she would have given him more, she would have given him everything. But he wasn’t and a candle was all she could do.

“I know it’s little, but it’s something. I hope you can forgive me. And I hope that maybe I can forgive you. Whatever that means.”

Catelyn had struggled with that. Forgiveness. She had been told that she couldn’t truly move on, that she couldn’t be happy until she forgave Ned for dying. She didn’t really know what they meant, she wasn’t blaming Ned for getting murdered. She was blaming the man who stabbed him. But still they told her that she needed to forgive, that she needed to stop being angry with him for leaving her. She thought it was stupid, of course she was angry, but she wasn’t angry with him. And she would rather die than forgive his killer.

“They made Valentine’s Day stuff at Rickon’s preschool yesterday. And he made a drawing on a heart shaped paper.”

She had to pause and take a deep breath. She had known that she would cry, she always did when she visited him for a holiday of some sort. At home the weekdays were the worst. Coming home from work alone, making dinner alone, going to bed alone. She was surrounded by people most of the time and she was still alone. But having to go to the graveyard to wish her husband a happy holiday. That was terrible.

“And he drew our family. All of us. Except for you.”

When Rickon had handed it to her she had smiled and told him how good it was. But afterwards she had locked herself in the bathroom and hyperventilated.

“He doesn’t remember you.”

Rickon didn’t remember his dad. He didn’t remember Ned. Just after Ned had died he had cried all the time, and asked why Daddy had left them. Why he wasn’t coming home to them. And as time passed he had asked less and less. Until he stopped asking. Didn’t talk about Ned at all. But she had not thought that he had completely forgotten, she had thought that he just didn’t talk about it because it made him sad. But then he had given her the drawing and happily pointed out that everyone was on it, and she had realized that Rickon thought he had no dad. That he had never had a dad.

“He made me put it on the fridge. But it was gone this morning. One of the others had taken it down. I couldn’t bring myself to ask who.”

It had been a relief when she came down to the kitchen and discovered that it was gone. Because she had not been able to look at it. Their family without Ned. She guessed the other children felt the same. They all remembered Ned, they all missed him. It had been hard for them.

She taken an old picture, one her father had taken at Rickon’s second birthday, and put it up in the drawing’s place. One with all of them. One where Ned stood next to her with one arm around her waist and a smile on his face.

If she closed her eyes she could almost imagine the feeling of it. His warm, steady, safe presence close to her. It felt like she would never know peace without that feeling. Without him. But she had to have faith in that she would, because a life in constant grief was no life. She probably would have gone mad had it not been for the kids. 

“We all miss you terribly. Rickon too, even if he doesn’t quite know it. I know he does. He just needs a bit of reminding, he’s still so small.”

She raised her left hand, let her fingers trace the letters on the cold stone. Eddard Stark. It wasn’t true. That wasn’t Ned, it was merely bones. Her husband had been more than that.

She still wore the ring. He had given her that ring, she had married him. And then she had been widowed.

“You know, I tried to stop wearing it for a while a few weeks back.”

She had not told him that before, even though she had been there without the ring.

“But it just felt wrong. And suddenly I was out there, alone, without a husband. Apparantly men see a finger without a ring as an invitation.”

He would have been angry if he had been able to see it.

“And I am definitely not ready for that. I won’t be for a long time. So I put it back on. It feels better.”

It was a sort of protection. As long as she wore the ring she wasn’t alone, she was still a wife even though she had been widowed. She was painfully aware of that eventually she would have to stop. But she was still waiting for the day when she felt ready because it had not come yet.

“You can’t just hang out by that grave all day, you know.”

She flew up and spun around. Only to find her brother standing a few meters away.

She raised a hand to her chest, tried to slow the beating of her heart. With the other hand she dried the tears on her cheeks.

“Gods-fucking-damnit, Edmure, I told you to pick me up down the street!” Catelyn sniffled, trying to keep her voice steady.

They were going to their father for dinner. Lysa had already taken all the kids there, Catelyn had told her that she needed to run some errands and that she would come with Edmure.

“Yeah, but you were late. And I figured you were here.”

She looked down at the ground and noticed that she had knocked over the candle. The small flame had been put out. She immediately knew that she wouldn’t be able to light it again, the snow had made the wick wet. Whatever little warmth she had been able to give was gone.

“I suppose I lost track of time” she mumbled.

Edmure came over to her and laid an arm around her shoulders.

“Does it help you?” he asked.

“What?”

“Does talking to that stone help you?”

“I need to talk to him every now and then, tell him how we’re doing and what’s happening. I know he can’t hear me, I know he’s not here anymore, but I need this. I can’t stand the thought of him not knowing. He hated not knowing things.”

It probably wasn’t healthy, it probably didn’t help her move forward at all. Most likely it kept her chained to a spot she had to leave for her own wellbeing. But she needed it all the same.

“Okay” Edmure said and kissed the top of her head. “I know you miss him, but I also know that spending too much time with the dead isn’t healthy. So let’s get out of here.”

Catelyn just leaned against him for a moment. Braced herself for yet another family event without her husband. It would be okay, she would be okay. Eventually.

[maskved]

hello, besties ! this is ami (she/her) and i’m probably late with this intro ! first i’m sorry for mass-liking every post but i’m already in love with all your lovely muses. also i must confess that i’ve only read the first book ( years ago ) and watched the show because i have an attention span of - 10 seconds.  but at least i’m a soc hoe, so we can scream about that ... please ... !!! so if i get anything wrong pls let me know or you can also not let me know and i’ll continue being embarrassing 😔. anyway, if you are interested in some juicy plotting pls LIKE this post or message me ( if you want to plot on discord we can also do that 💖). I’M EXCITED.

PINTEREST  . discor*d     six of hoes🔪#7888  //  YEVA

[ viktoriya zobova ], an [ twenty six ] year old grisha in the little palace. she is  a [ tailor ] and are known in the little palace as the [ viscerotonic ]. they are known to be [ resilient ] and [ elusive ] and vaguely resemble [ kristine froseth ]. 

death tw

- viktoriya zobova ( however, prefers to be called vika because every time one calls her by her full name she might as well be in trouble ) had never been more than average. born to average parents ( although grisha their powers pale compared to others ) into an average family and of course as the middle child, vika strived for more than simply being overlooked.

- truth to be told, she dreaded to be tested. to her it seemed like the final reminder that she was nothing special, average, merely an extra to someone other’s story. she even wished, she wouldn’t be a grisha, fearing that like her parents she’d belong to the lower ranks. however, if she turned out to be a simple human without any power, at least she’d be special within her family or could even try to make a story up that she was adopted or something ( i hate her -- ).

- however, the moment she found out about being able to alter people’s appearances with her ability *atla vc* everything changed - 

- truth to be told she knew she was considered to be lower rank among others but what really fueled her arrogance and the sudden feeling of self importance was her knowing that she possessed a rare ability. she didn’t care others treating her badly for her rank because “hey i can alter appearances and that is lit ( she probably didn’t say it that way - )

- ALSO ( here comes the moment i throw in my found family trope bcs i’m a soc hoe and this actually plays a big role in her story ) she’d found comfort in the friends she met.

- (lemme add my childhood friends trope bcs why not ) as vika was never close to her parents ( to be fair her being taken away for the training at such a young age did not really gave her the time to really bond with her family ) her little group of friends became her second family. they called themselves “blood is thicker water” ( gang ???) bcs 1) vika really thought the saying was blood is thicker water and not blood is thicker than water 2) they thought they were incredibly funny.

- they were pretty much known as troublemakers, especially with vika being a tailor it was easy to sometimes shift the blame on others. truth to be told, it only caused vika to be more frivolous. all the fun they had blinded her judgment and she viewed her ability as harmless.

- well, lets say vika becoming more reckless did not end up being the best character development (lmao). as usual , everything started out as a harmless joke. her friend asked her to change his appearance. however, this time they wanted her to change their whole face. not just the colour of their hair or eyes. vika was reluctant at first, she’d never done it before but in the end she agreed to it and much to her surprise she succeeded. she even bragged about it and told her friends ( of the bloody “blood is thicker water” gang (???) ) .

-  to cut a long story short, their friend ended up dying because of it. i have two versions for their death ( i haven’t decided on it yet *clown emoji*)

1) the person they changed their appearance into apparantly was involed in some shady stuff and had some pretty morally questionable people around him. they thought vika’s friends was that person they were looking for (bcs of the changed appearance) and killed them for some reason.

2) vika’s friend was supposed to be part of some mission they didn’t want to go to, thus changed their appearance to escape from it. however, ended up having to do another mission and ended up being killed. 

RIP nameless but vital character to vika’s bio 

- vika pretty much blamed herself for it and maybe her friends of their friend group as well. this incident also ‘humbled’ vika and now instead of being proud of it she hates it.

- right now, she doesn’t really know what to do with her future. she has this ‘oh so grand’ plan that one day she might be able to change her appearance (permanently) and then leave the little palace and live under a new name and lead a life where she wouldn’t need to use her abilities anymore.

personality ( i’m trying to keep it short i swear, i’m just adding a bunch of sentence here bcs i’m throwing all my ideas into this paragraph)

- she’s known to be pretty social. she loves to talk and honestly doesn’t know when to shut up. she can’t deal with silence because it forces her to think about things she doesn’t want to think about. although, her tongue is sharp and trouble seems to follow her, she also loves to dance around the issue, pushing her feelings away and replacing it with a witty joke instead. as if everyone does it the same way, as if everyone is supposed to understand. 

headcanons

- although she was tempted to change her own appearance many times. she never did because she is a coward and doesn’t trust her skills as much others might think she does.

- she views her ability as a form of art, perhaps that is also the reason she used to love to paint. honestly, she was never really good at it. average and above average with practice. her friend ( the dead one lmao ) used to paint with her whenever they could sneak away but with them gone, she doesn’t see a point in it anymore.

- she secretly envies the other grisha’s who can use their ability to fight. recently, she’d find herself trying to practice some punches so she doesn’t feel that useless in case of a dangerous situation. she also sucks at that so she’s probably in need of a training patner aka someone who is willing to train her or she has annoyed that much that they were willing to help her out ( wc ???)

- being personally trained by the darkling, one might assume that she’s loyal or even thankful towards the darkling. however, contrary is the case and she wouldn’t even grant him a dust particle of her trust. she doesn’t believe that he has the best interest of anyone in his heart and if she could, she’d probably spread rumors about him and telling others that he has some serious case of stanky breath.

wanted connections ( just some ideas, which can be changed ofc ! or some wcs can be connected ) 

(0/3) “blood is thicker water” friend group  : they pretty much grew up together. the death of their friend ( the friend needs a name - i swear...) caused tension within the group. while, one might have blamed vika for their death the other doesn’t and just wants them to be how they used to be. nevertheless, no one can deny that nothing was what it used to be). (( honestly these are just some ideas and we can plot wtv sddm )

training partner ( can be more than one ): connection mentioned in the hcs ! they help her a little out to become physically fit and level up her combat skills of -10. maybe they want something in return for it. help her out bcs they’re just nice or bcs vika annoyed the heck out of them etc.

person vika changed their friend’s appearance into: honestly we can do wtv with it. i just thought it’d be fun to play with the idea and having the person running around when they actually “died” and everyone belieed them to be dead until they found out that it was vika’s friend. might be angsty bcs it might remind vika of their friend.

angsty exes: listen, i love some angsty shit and i love to blame vika for all the problems. they might have dated before the whole dead friend fiasco happened. although, viktoriya acted as if she was fine after the incident ( which she wasn’t ),it only made muse a realize that vika and them weren’t as close as they believed and how much vika tied to hide from them.  BUT tbh anything would work i love a good angsty ex connection djddnd

random idea but i just liked the thought that this person once went to vika for some enhancing stuff. however, this day vika was not really herself, distracted, head in the clouds. so she accidenally might have gotten rid of some important scar or something.

enemies : lbr, vika might prbly be the type who has some enemies. she has no filter and might has stepped on someone toes because of it. (Also maybe gimme some enemies to lovers trope , adding this here quietly to not expose myself as a hoe for that trope )

HONESTLY GIVE ME EVERYTHING, gimme angst, fluff, tropes !!??? more friends, unusual friends, shippy stuff, platonic stuff, family connections djdsd GIMME