#i had to ask my mom for numbers that were coherent lmao

[vonlipvig]

STONKS!

of course i had to draw the four horsemen of capitalism of the not for broadcast universe, baby. sorry boys, i only invest in girlbosses.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 300: Days of Our Todorokis

Previously on BnHA: Hawks was all “hey Jeanist, wanna go on a road trip with me to my mom’s house?” Jeanist was all “you know it,” and so they hopped into Jeanist’s jercedes and took off. Hawks took a nap and had a flashback to his Dickensian childhood living in a abject poverty with his jerk mom and jerk dad, thinking heroes were make-believe until one day Endeavor arrested his dad and Baby Hawks was all “OH SHIT.” And then he saved a bunch of people, and the HPSC was all “what do we have here,” and blah blah blah, you know the rest. Back in the present, Hawks was all “well my life is currently in shambles, but on the plus side there’s no one bossing me around anymore so that’s pretty cool,” and then decided he was going to talk to Endeavor. Fandom was all “I can’t believe Hawks would side with his childhood hero over the man who burned his wings off and posted a video calling him a violent murderer who took after his abusive dad,” so that was fun and stuff. I can’t wait to see what piping fresh takes this new chapter will bring.

Today on BnHA: Our old friend Carbonation Carl tries to loot a Starbucks and gets his ass kicked by a senior citizen. Society is all “YEAH, WE’RE REALLY STARTING TO GET SICK OF THIS SHIT.” Old Man Samurai is all “this room won’t stop me because I can’t read it” and abruptly decides to retire, which, fun fact, is literally THE LEAST HELPFUL THING ANYONE HAS EVER DONE. Anyway so then a bunch of other punkasses follow suit, and while I won’t say that I’m actually starting to root for Stain to kill some peeps, just for the record I’m not not saying that either. Back in the hospital, Endeavor cries some tears because his life sucks, and then is confronted by his entire family, LED BY QUEEN REI, FIRST OF HER NAME, BACK IN BUSINESS AND LARGE AND IN CHARGE. Rei is all “fuck feeling sorry for yourself, we have a rogue Murder Son on the loose” and I swear to god I have never felt so alive.

so here we go! and just for the record, even though the last two chapters have been phenomenal, I don’t necessarily have any sky-high expectations for chapter 300, mostly because chapters 100 and 200 consisted of Mei Boobs, and Toadette and her horrific quirk lmao. so go ahead Horikoshi, what are you gonna pull out of your hat for this one

oh, back to this stuff again. sob

I guess there was only so much time we could spend having hospital antics and exploring Hawks’s past before we got back to dealing with the whole “the world has gone to absolute shit” issue huh, lol

omg

what’s with these bizarrely cute Noumus. why do I want to pet them

so the narrative text is going on about how people have been super paranoid about the Noumu ever since the USJ incident a year ago. so yeah, I guess the fact that there are now a bunch of them confirmed to be running around is really freaking people out even on top of everything else

wtf is happening here

what did this poor lil glass ever do to anyone. r.i.p.

OH MY FUCKING GOD

SODA SAM IS BACK ON THE LAM

tsk tsk tsk. my man has graduated from snatching purses to raiding cafes. going after that big money. this man has no business sense whatsoever lmao

OH BUT WATCH IT NOW!!

OH SNAP THE PEOPLE ARE FIGHTING BACK. WHATCHA GONNA DO NOW SAM

THIS MAN IS 172 YEARS OLD AND HE’S NOT HERE TO PLAY GAMES!!

WTF IS HE LIGHTING THIS THING ON FIRE OR SOME SHIT. GETTEM GRANDPA YEAHHHH HE’S CHARGING AT EM YEAHHHHHH

lmao so that was fun. and now we’re cutting to Wash!! omg. look at him

he’s so dedicated. too bad you don’t have a car like Best Jeanist. probably takes a while when you’re just running everywhere

you see?? you were too slow!!

NOOOO, GRANDPA. he defeated Pepsi Pete, but lost his life in the process. this is too tragic

anyway so the good news is that the cafe has been saved! but the bad news is, there really isn’t much of a cafe left. huh. I guess that’s one of the reasons why people are supposed to get a license to use their quirks like this

oh snap and now everyone is coming outside, and they’re none too happy to see poor old Wash over here

seriously Wash, get a bicycle or something. also the way this guy is gesturing so dramatically with his hand in this sort of “YOU SEE!! YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS!!” manner is sending me

OH MY GOD

HE SPEAKS. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS. IT MEANS JEANS PUNS ARE YESTERDAY’S NEWS, FOLKS!! MAKE WAY FOR THE LAUNDRY PUNS. CAN’T WAIT TO WATCH THIS ALL... UNFOLD

“the heroes had dwindled away” okay real talk you guys, it is literally only a matter of time before they press-gang the children into picking up their slack. I still don’t know how to feel about that, but it is happening one way or the other regardless. Child Soldiers 2 Electric Boogaloo. wonder if we’ll see a rise in vigilante action as well

OHO WHAT’S THIS? THIS IS A CHAPTER OF GRANDPAS HUH

-- no fucking way

WOW. WOW. WOWWWWWW

wow. so he didn’t do a fucking thing while the rest of the top ten were being turned into red mist in the previous arc, and now that it’s all over and they need his help more than ever, he decides... THAT IT’S TIME TO RETIRE. holy shit. “fuck you” doesn’t even begin to cover it my guy. you stand there and soak up those boos you coward

ohhhhhhh shiiiiit you guys. oh shit

the “I am not here” breaks my fucking heart for real though y’all. oh man. everything he worked for is gone just like that

(ETA: okay so a couple of the takes I’ve seen on this make it seem like All Might is somehow the bad guy here?? “this is what happens when society puts a bunch of glorified cops on a pedestal”, “finally the cracks in hero society are showing”, etc. etc. so, just a friendly reminder that this isn’t happening because of too much trust and a lack of critical thinking; this is happening because the villains killed all the heroes and broke a bunch of murderers out of jail. it’s happening because an organized league of terrorists succeeded in terrorizing, and so society is now understandably awash in fear and panic. like, it’s just wild to me that AFO is RIGHT FUCKING THERE, and yet week after week fandom still has their “IT’S ALL THE HEROES’ FAULT” signs still up on their lawns. BUT WHATEVER, MOVING ON.)

also though, so exactly how much time is passing here now? I wanted to go straight back to the hospital and see what happens with Deku and the Todorokis. please don’t tell me we’re jumping ahead sob. my aaaaangst

OH SHIT

STAIN. LISTEN UP BUDDY. I KNOW WE’VE HAD OUR DIFFERENCES, AND I STILL DESPISE YOU FOR CRIPPLING TENSEI AND TRYING TO KILL MY BEST BOY TENYA. BUT AS IT HAPPENS, THERE ARE ONE OR TWO OTHER HEROES OUT THERE NOW WHO I WOULDN’T MIND YOU PAYING A VISIT I’M JUST SAYING

LOL BUT IT ACTUALLY ISN’T THIS MAN, FFFFFF

sob. yeah I was talking about Old Man Samurai actually but YEAH. HEY THERE ENJI

also is this entire hospital actually run by characters from Super Mario Bros though. first Yoshi and now this guy, come the fuck on that is not a coincidence

lmao they stuck him in another one of these cavernous creepy hospital rooms

wtf is it with Horikoshi and these giant fucking rooms lately. Kacchan’s in chapter 298, then Tomie’s colossal house furnished with like one table and a TV, and now this. and the weirdest thing about it though is that “huge space with nothing to fill it up” is like the exact opposite of what you’ll usually find in Japanese homes lol

so now Enji is just sitting there thinking things like “my head is fuzzy” and “I’m alive” lmao okay. not quite all there yet, huh. I’ll give you a minute

I’m so fucking curious as to who his first visitor is going to be omg. either way it’s going to be interesting af, and either way fandom is probably going to feel some way about it but OH WELL

okay now his thoughts are getting more coherent! and he’s remembering Touya, and feeling regret for freezing up and forcing Shouto to deal with everything instead

!!! OH HERE GOES BRACE YOURSELVES Y’ALL IT’S ABOUT TO GET SPICY

NO TOUYA PLEASE DON’T CRY HONEY NO PLEASE

ohhhhhhh man

okay, I mean I didn’t expect you to, but so instead then you’re just going to do... what? lie there and wallow in regret and self-pity for the rest of your life? son you know that’s not how we deal with our problems here in Shounen

though also, I totally do get it though. honestly, thinking on it, I probably would have been disappointed with any other response. but so this is where the rest of his family (including his adopted son) come into play now though, because like it or not they’re all in this thing together. and so friends, I am once again asking you WHO IS GOING TO BE THE ONE TO VISIT ENJI FIRST

AHHHHHHH

KRANCH!!!! OMG AND THE OTHERS ARE SO TINY NEXT TO HIM THAT I ALMOST DIDN’T SEE THEM AT FIRST. IT’S BECAUSE THEY’RE TWENTY MILES AWAY ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THIS REGULATION HOCKEY RINK OF A ROOM

holy shit I’m so excited lkjlklhlglkasdsjldfk

SDKFJLSKHLKJL

the way she has him by his collar lmaoooo. “lol nah you’re not going anywhere pal.” damn straight, siblings have to be ride or die in situations like this. banding together for survival. strength in numbers

OH MY STARS I’M JUST WARNING YOU NOW THAT I’M ABOUT TO DISSECT EVERY LAST REMAINING PANEL OF THIS CHAPTER PROBABLY YOU GUYS. WE COULD BE HERE A WHILE

love how Fuyu has absolutely no idea how to segue into THE SINGLE MOST AWKWARD CONVERSATION SHE’S EVER HAD, so she just GOES FOR IT in pure small talk mode like they’re meeting up for brunch somewhere

I KNOW IT’S A SMALL THING, BUT I APPRECIATE THAT THE FIRST THING ENJI ASKS IS WHETHER THEY’RE OKAY

lastly while I can’t wait for more of this delicious Natsu angst, I also just have to say that Enji has as much reason to cry right now as anyone on the planet. you can’t deny that being confronted by your not-dead-but-you-thought-he-was-dead son who’s all “SURPRISE DAD I GREW UP TO BE A MASS MURDERER AND I HATE YOU AND EVERYTHING IS ALL YOUR FAULT AND NOW I’M GONNA MAIM YOUR OTHER KID” with a side order of “EVERYONE HATES YOU AND SOCIETY IS CRUMBLING AND NOTHING WILL EVER BE GOOD EVER AGAIN” is enough to bum pretty much anyone out. there’s a Pagliacci the Clown joke here somewhere. BUT DOCTOR, I AM THE NUMBER ONE HERO

oh man lol he is seriously falling apart

damn. like you guys, I’m sorry, go ahead and cancel me, but I do feel compassion for the man. it’s therapeutic for me to see an abuser actually feel remorse and be truly sorry and want to change and want to make it up to his family. and it’s also compelling as fuck to read a narrative about a family that’s trying to grapple with that, because let me tell you straight up, as someone who’s done a version of that song and dance -- it is exhausting. it is a piping hot mess. it’s a gigantic mishmosh of extremely volatile emotions that all somehow all contradict one another. love, hurt, hope, anger, betrayal, resentment, attachment, longing. it’s something you can both be desperate for and also want nothing at all to do with. and attempting to portray all of that and write about it is a monumental task, and one which Horikoshi has done so, so delicately thus far, and damn but I appreciate it. anyway, so I’m here and I’m ready for my latest helping of Todoroki Fam Feels you guys

GASP

oh man. OHMANOHMANOHMAN. CAN IT REALLY BE. IS THIS THE REDEMPTION ARC OF CHAPTERS 100 AND 200???

LMAO SHE’S ALL “WE ALL FEEL BAD YOU JACKASS STOP CRYING ABOUT IT”

LAY INTO HIM REI!! SORRY ENJI YOUR PITY PARTY HAS BEEN CANCELLED IN FAVOR OF A “SO WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT” PARTY COURTESY OF QUEEN ELSA OVER HERE. THE PEOPLE TOOK A VOTE AND WE WANT LESS WHINING AND MORE ACTION

oh my god look at this lady folks

NOTE THE HAIR BLOWING IN THE NONEXISTENT WIND. NOW WE KNOW WHERE SHOUTO GOT THIS POWER FROM

(ETA: btw guys, seeing Rei handle this crisis like an absolute champ despite everything she’s been through is everything, though. I’m reminded of Hawks’s line last week about people sometimes unexpectedly finding liberation when they’re backed into a corner. like things may be shit but goddammit her kiddos need her.)

THE CHAPTER IS ALREADY ENDING SOB, IT’S ONLY A 17-PAGER THIS WEEK, BUT GODDAMN WHAT A WAY TO CLOSE

oh my god. oh my god oh my god. AND FUCK YOU HORIKOSHI FOR CUTTING IT OFF THERE sob. it’s like each week the wait for the next chapter becomes more painful. the Todofam is about to get real, and on top of that Hawks is gonna crash the party at some point down the line, and on top of that we’re still waiting for Kacchan to have his own heartfelt discussion about What The Fuck Are We Supposed To Do Next with his best friend who’s currently in a coma. all I want to do with my life is read about these three things, and all I can do is simply wait as they are portioned out in agonizing, addicting little installments every week

anyway! tune in next time as we answer the question of whether or not fandom will finally run its train of logic all the way through to its natural conclusion and somehow manage to cancel Noted Abuse Apologist Todoroki Fucking Rei. don’t act like it can’t happen. you all know nothing is sacred lol. anyways but I’m ready for anything lol, bring it

[aethersea]

you know what, I never do these things, but actually I’ve decided I would like to get to know people better! I would like to partake of the mortifying ordeal! I would like to talk about myself for a bit!

ok for the next...let’s say five days I will answer any of these things that people tag me in, or any random personal questions you plop in my ask box. I don’t have an ask meme on hand but just....pick one you’ve seen recently, or make up questions of your own, and I’ll answer. (the answer might be ‘nope that’s private’ but I will answer.) (@ the anon who asked for book recs - I see you, I’ve been thinking of books all day, I’m going to give you SUCH a long answer, I hope you don’t regret your choices bc it WILL be full of gushing)

alright, let’s go!

🌻 Tag 9 people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @booksandchainmail​

Last Song: I’m currently listening to “Falcon in the Dive” from the Scarlet Pimpernel musical on loop. I watched one or two Scarlet Pimpernel movies when I was just barely too young to fully get what was going on, and the story’s held an odd but deep-seated place in my heart ever since. A few years ago I found out there’s a musical and most of the songs are pretty stellar (go listen to “Madame Guillotine” if you like big ensemble broadway numbers, it’s a banger, the bit where he cries out for God has been running through my mind on and off for a few days now haha not like that’s topical or anything), so every once in a while I spend a few days listening to them a lot.

Sometime last year I read the actual book, and got super into the whole concept of the Scarlet Pimpernel for a while. I plotted out Pimpernel aus for several fandoms, I read the entire wikipedia article, and I went looking for bootlegs of the musical. I didn’t find one, but I did find a full radioplay-style recording of the script, complete with full musical numbers, and listened to it like a podcast.

Reader, I was so disappointed. The play adds some scenes, bc a lot of the dramatic tension of the novel comes from internal conflict and that doesn’t stage super well, and the very first scene of this play – a play written in the NINETIES – features our dashing hero rescuing some aristocrats from a French prison, and then saying to the person in the next cell, who begs for rescue but is not an aristocrat, “We have enough of your kind in England.”

Enough! of your KIND! What in the merry frickety HECK my dudes!! The book has some rather unfortunate™ takes but it is from 1905, it’s regrettable but sadly to be expected. This play is from 1997. It has NO excuse. This scene wasn’t even in the book! What! the heck!

I was so disheartened that I lost my excitement for the play, and a couple songs later I stopped listening. It occurred to me just a few days ago that you could actually stage that ironically, with the person in the cell giving the audience a “can you believe this” look, and then the rest of the play could feature assorted non-aristocratic ensemble members constantly looking at the audience like they’re on The Office. And hey, maybe that’s what they did, or something similar – maybe that was never meant to be taken as a cleanly heroic stance, and the play deals with it in a complex way. It’s possible. I wouldn’t know. Kinda doubt it though, based on song lyrics.

Favorite Color: red, probably

Last Movie: I watched that new lesbian christmas movie with my family for christmas, the one with kirsten stewart and the guy from schitt’s creek. it’s very sweet and good and kinda sad, and I really enjoyed it. it also incidentally has the best gay best friend trope in probably anything ever, bc it’s not a trope (I didn’t realize until several hours after watching that it technically fits), it’s just a guy who is the protagonist’s best friend, and they’re just all gay, and then when he Gives Relationship Advice as a gay best friend always does, it’s advice about how to deal with your partner’s hangups around coming out.

actually every part of the gay best friend trope becomes better when they’re just best friends who are both gay. the big dramatic gestures (in this case, driving some ungodly distance in the snow on no notice) go from “haha how kooky” to “queer man will do anything he needs to to rescue his queer friend from an isolating & potentially triggering situation”. the relationship advice isn’t “honey you deserve some self-respect, treat yourself”, it’s a deeply sincere reminder of the vulnerability that is shared across almost everyone’s queer experience, and look I could ramble about this for a long time before reaching a coherent point but I’m INTO IT, okay? I’m into it.

Last Show: you want me to remember what show I last finished???? impossible, cannot be done, it was a long time ago and the adhd has eaten everything that happened before last week. here, instead I’ll tell you about another movie I watched, late at night with my mom in cozy companionship just a couple days ago. it’s called Quigley Down Under and it’s about a cowboy who goes to Australia and kills a bunch of racists, 10/10 would watch again. it’s from 1990 but it feels much older, with the music choices and the cinematography of a 70s Western. the cowboy is great, honorable and fearless and kind, but the breakaway star of this movie for me is the woman who attaches herself to his side and refuses to leave. her name is Cora, and she’s crazy, in the sense that she’s not altogether tethered to reality, but this never for a second diminishes her agency. she’s fierce and clever and compassionate, and she basically never does anything she doesn’t want to in the whole movie. her arc is about overcoming trauma by taking charge of her own fear and facing it head-on, she is never belittled or dismissed by the narrative or the protagonist, and look she’s just so cool. I love her. she’s so vibrantly alive. her story could probably have been handled with a bit more nuance, but honestly for the 90s it’s pretty great. I’m no expert, but I found nothing objectionable in it, just a bit of heavy-handedness.

anyway the theme of the movie is that racism is evil and racists deserve to be shot, and this too could have been handled better (not a single aboriginal character speaks a single line of english in this movie), but it follows through on that message in every way, while still being a fun kinda campy cowboy movie. overall a very good time.

Currently Watching: started showing my sister Hilda the other day, and she’s liking it! I love that show, it’s so incredibly cute. can’t wait to see season 2

Currently Reading: lmao I wish. lately the brain has firmly rejected all attempts to read anything of any length. currently pending, bc I was halfway through them when my brain stalled out, are tano’s fic What Does Kill You Can Make You Stronger, Too, a Toby Daye book - I think it was The Brightest Fell, I got like half a chapter in and haven’t picked it up in over a month, the Locked Tomb series, and probably a few other things too. ooh! also a book called Making Sex by thomas laqueur, which is my fancy academic reading that I’ve been doing in short bursts for the past year or two when I feel fancy and academic. it’s about the development of the concept of biological sex and of gender in Western society, and it’s fascinating. has among other things introduced me to the idea that until quite recently, fathers were a matter of faith. the mother? yeah, you can watch the baby pop out, we all know who the mother is. but the father? how can you know? how can you really know? we have paternity tests these days, but for all of human history up until now, we've just had to take fatherhood on faith. (not to mention we didn’t even know what fathers were contributing to the production of a fetus. clearly it was something, since you can’t get pregnant without a penis getting involved, but we have literally not known what until the past few decades. and that is wild. it has colored ALL of human history, all of our conceptions of society and family and kinship and gender, all of it, and it hadn’t even occurred to me until it was spelled out for me in this book, and it’s just......wow.

Salty, sweet or savory: for christmas my sister and I made seven different types of cookie, most of them involving chocolate somehow.

Craving: no bc I ate so many cookies. unless sleep counts. or maybe pringles, it’s been many moons since last I had a potato chip and I miss them.

Coffee or Tea: no thank you

Tagging: @coloursisee, @krchy-tuna, @sam-j-squirrel, @xzienne, @mirandatam, @viciousmaukeries, @sepulchritude, @elidyce, and @navigatorsnorth bc it’s been a while since we’ve talked, and I’m super hyped that you’re married now. v happy for you!

[illfoandillfie]

Seaside Rendezvous - Part 3

READ PART 1  // PART 2

Request:  Can you please write a hc for going on a island vaca at a resort with your family after college finals and you meet joe (also a college student) and you two see each other a ton but you are always with your family so not much happens but flirty small talk and you both end up having a lot of sexual tension and go into one of your rooms when you’re family is out and just some smut happens?

Pairing: Joe Mazzello x Fem!Reader

Warnings: SMUT (FINALLY) 18+, Golf related double entendres, not-quite-hate sex, unprotected sex,but also protected sex, choking, oral sex (m & f receiving), mild spanking, shower sex, mentions of edging, handjob. 

Words: 8969

A/N: Ummmm, I don’t even know what to say. I kinda can’t believe I’ve finished it. Or how many words I took to do it. Thank you so fucking much to the anon who sent in the original request because this was so much fun to write. I really hope you enjoy the payoff for all the bullshit I put them through in the first two chapters. It might just be because I’m still so close to this story but I kinda wanna write more for them so if you have blurb requests about what else they got up to or whatever send them my way lmao

Taglist: @laedymoon  @somekind-ofcheese @dtfrogertaylor   @ezmina98  @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor @bowiequeen  @hannafuckingsucks @bemy-clementine

@ramibaby  @briarrose26 @d34d-0n-th3-1ns1d3  @painkiller80 @stephydearestxo​

You cursed yourself when you woke and remembered what was in store for the day. You cursed your Mom for being so intent on manipulating your love life. You cursed your Dad for being the type of guy who would make friends with the first man he talked to. You cursed Joe for being the first man your Dad talked to. And for everything else that’d happened last night. And then you cursed yourself again for getting stuck in this position and for flirting with Joe in the first place and for not sleeping with him when you had the chance. The very quick orgasm you’d been able to rub out before the rest of your family returned to your rooms wasn’t anywhere near enough. It wasn’t what you wanted. Maybe if you’d had a bit more time it would have been more satisfying. But you hadn’t been sure how long they’d take to finish their meal or whether they’d come straight up to the rooms or hang out downstairs for a while, so you’d rushed. It was almost worth it, though, to see your mother so surprised to find you sitting up in bed reading. She’d almost jumped when she realised you were there, hand landing over her heart like you’d sprung out from behind a wall and yelled boo. Of course, she’d had to pretend otherwise in front of Erin, not wanting to explain where she thought you’d actually be. Thank god she was going to be occupied all day because you did not want to have the ‘I just think you should socialise with people your own age’ talk that was all poorly hidden code for ‘I’m hungry for gossip and your sex life is the best thing to potentially tell everyone about’. The reminder that your Mom and Erin would be busy made you curse Joe again. If he’d not been such an impatient dick about it, you probably would have had the entire day to yourselves, to spend however you wanted wearing as few clothes as you deemed necessary. Instead you’d be spending the day with your Dad. Playing golf.

Joe, wearing a red polo shirt that looked way too good on him, greeted you stiffly when you met up with him and your father at the entrance to the golf course, obviously displeased about how last night had gone. He barely looked at you as you hired out clubs and made your way to the first hole, though you thought you might have caught him peeking at your ass once or twice. It’d be a lie to say you’d not specifically chosen the shorts you wore because of how good they made you look, though you weren’t sure if it was because you wanted to make Joe suffer a little or to tempt him into touching you again. Maybe a bit of both. Either way, he remained aloof, mostly ignoring you, for the first couple of holes anyway. If your Dad noticed any tension between you and Joe, he didn’t let on, talking to you both about the game and constantly sharing tips he’d picked up over the years. By hole number three he’d had made a couple of bad hits, having to head into a sand trap to retrieve his ball. Which left you and Joe. Standing there. Waiting. He cracked first. “Didn’t expect you to show,” he sneered, one eye on your father. “And miss this? You’re in a charming mood by the way,” “I’m not in any mood, I’m just a little tired.” “Sure, if you say so. Just, tell me this one thing. Is that because you were up all night thinking about me?” There was a triumphant cry from your father as he finally managed to get his ball free of the sand. You clapped as he returned to where you and Joe were standing, taking a theatrical bow. “Sorry, I’m usually a bit better than that.” “Don’t worry Dad, me and Joe aren’t very good so it’s probably better for us if you’re having an off day.” Alright Joe, you’re up,” your Dad said with a laugh, “Just remember to grip your shaft softly and stroke it smooth and you’ll get it in the hole no problem.” “And maybe don’t feel the ball up under the dinner table,” you said soft enough so only Joe would hear as he walked past you to line up his shot. You weren’t sure if he was just generally terrible at golf, or because you’d got inside his head, but either way it took him three tries to hit the ball and when he did he sent it off in the wrong direction. “Oh, bad lucky Joey,” you teased as he scowled at you. “As if you could do better,” “Watch me.”

You did do better, thank god, though not by much. You hadn’t gotten to the hole, but you were at least in the right general area. It was enough to piss Joe off further, his competitiveness coming out with his frustration. At the next hole he managed to get the ball in first try, earning a hearty congratulations from your Dad and a half-hearted one from you. “It’s because he took my advice,” your Dad said proudly, “I told him to put his head down and spread his legs a bit and see Y/N, he did it and it worked, straight in the hole. Maybe you should give it a shot too.” “Yes, Y/N, why don’t you try spreading your legs a bit more,” Joe laughed. You resisted the urge to ask him for a hands-on demonstration as you took your own, much less successful shot. As soon as your Dad was far enough away, leading you on to the next hole, Joe turned back to you. “Careful Y/N, more shots that pathetic and I might just win.” “You got lucky.” “Only right one of us should.” “Aww, you still mad I left you high and dry last night? Your hand just not good enough?” “Don’t act like you had any better. Besides, you don’t know I didn’t go off and find someone else. You’re not the only girl who can dress slutty and play at being the damsel in distress. “Nice try but the jealousy card won’t work. Already admitted to thinking about me all night.” “I did not admit that.” “Not intentionally but I can see it in your eyes. I saw it the moment you said good morning to me.” “Fine, maybe you’re right. I was thinking about you alone in your room, touching yourself. Trying to decide if you’d be using your fingers or if you were extra naughty and brought a toy with you.” “And how’d that work out for you?” “A shit night sleep actually. And I couldn’t make up my mind, both were such nice images. But I did come to one conclusion,” “Yeah?” “Yeah. You were thinking about me while you did it.” You were left scrambling to form a coherent sentence as he laughed and walked ahead.

By the ninth hole things were overtly competitive. Your Dad’s game had picked up, putting him well in the lead but you and Joe barely noticed, much too desperate to outdo the other to worry about anything else. Days of frustration, sexual and otherwise, had boiled into a competitiveness neither of you realised you were capable of. The in between moments, while you were unable to focus your aggression onto your balls, were spent at each other’s throats. Whispered comments ranging from insulting your game to insulting his manhood. Condescending tones and lazy double entendres. When you were trying to determine which of your clubs would be best Joe leaned over and cockily offered you one of his. “You could try my 5-Wood. Bigger head means you might have a chance of getting close.” “Sorry, Joe. Your clubs don’t have long enough shafts for me, couldn’t possibly be satisfying.” When he took an inordinately long time to make a shot you told him he could bang it in the back or slip it in gently but either way to hurry up. He fumbled it completely. Then, after your next swing he made sure to complement you on your bounce while staring directly at your chest. At hole 14 things got a little more personal. You casually let slip that you were, in fact, using your fingers last night, and asked Joe if knowing that for sure would have helped him sleep better. “You’re a fucking cock tease, Y/N,” he growled, “I don’t think you ever intended to sleep with me, you just get off from leading people on. Well I’m fucking done with it; you can go choke.” “Oh, kinky. Didn’t know you were into that kind of thing.” He huffed out a breath but otherwise didn’t respond.” “Don’t go quiet on me now, right when I’ve learnt about your little kink. You’d like to choke me, wouldn’t you? Did you think about it last night, while you were, y’know...?” you made a jerk off motion with your hand. “You’re right, I would like that, anything to shut you up for half a minute, but don’t pretend you’re not hot for it too. I can see you dripping from here.” “Well, you know me, I get off from being a tease apparently. You’re up. Try to hit the ball straight this time.”

The score at the end of the game was in your favour, but not by much. Your Dad just smiled at you as you cheered, amused by your celebrating but Joe was gritting his teeth. “Well that was fun,” your Dad said glancing at his watch, “do we want to play a few more rounds? It’s still fairly early,” “Actually, I really should head back,” Joe said, all smiles and polite words to your father, though perhaps a little more tart than he normally would have spoken, “I’ve got a thing booked for this afternoon so I probably should go shower and get changed. It’s been fun though; we should do this again.” “Not to worry Joe, thanks for indulging me today,” they shook hands and then Joe shouldered past you to return his clubs. “What about you Y/N? Up for some more?” “As fun as that sounds, I think I might head off too. I’ve been thinking about a mocktail and a bubble bath for the last three holes. Since the room’s free I might make hay while the sun shines.” "Cold drink doesn’t sound half bad now that you say that.” He walked with you back towards the main part of the resort, laughing and chatting about the game you’d just played, and commenting on how he’d missed having your sanity round the house. Joe was a little way ahead of you, but you determinedly kept your eyes anywhere but on the back of his head. On the off chance that he might turn around you didn’t want him to think you were staring at him. At the entrance to the lobby your Dad bid you farewell, heading off in the direction of the bar and leaving you to make your way upstairs.

Inside was quiet, most guests already out enjoying the sun and the sea. A handful of people milled around by the front desk with their suitcases, waiting to check into, or out of, their rooms and a few people wearing not much more than their bathers hurried past as you approached the elevator. The only other person waiting to head up to their room turned, eyes following a bikini clad woman, though he stopped once his vision met you. “There she is, The Tease. Heading off to make some other poor bastard miserable?” “You’re only miserable because you suck at golf. Fucking sore loser too, running off the second you found out I’d beat you.” “It was two points, it barely counts.” “Three points,” there was a ding and you followed Joe into the elevator, “And you of all people should know it’s not the size of the score that matters, only who you fuck over with it.” The words were barely out of your mouth before Joe was on you, pushing you up against the back wall and kissing you hungrily. If you’d been shocked by his sudden movement it didn’t last long, quickly giving way to the need to kiss him back. Your nails scraped at his shirt as you tried to press your bodies closer, helped by his hand sliding down to squeeze your ass as he pulled your hips into his. He leaned his other arm on the wall beside your head, anchoring you into place, not that you had any intention of trying to escape. He kissed you like he did at the market, needily and messily, though the intensity was a hundred times more, desire and frustration burning through you both. “Thought you said you were done with me,” you tried to sound disdainful as he pulled away, still firmly pinning you to the wall, but the words came out as more of a gasp than a sneer. “I said I was done with your teasing,” he managed to achieve the harsh tone you’d been going for as a second ding caught you by surprise and the elevator reached your floor, “C’mon,” he half growled, grabbing your hand to pull you down the corridor towards his room. You couldn’t help but giggle as he pushed you inside, still pissed off with him but more than a little giddy at the prospect of finally being able to do what you’d been wanting to do since you first saw him. He towered over you as he backed you further into the room, towards his bed, roughly tugging at your shirt, pulling it over your head and throwing it to the floor, before doing the same with his. You felt the back of your legs hit the bed and for a moment everything froze, both of you breathing hard. And then his hand was on your shoulder, pushing you down across the mattress, your legs dangling over the edge. He wasted no time in pulling your shoes and socks off as you unhooked your bra, tossing it aside. Your shorts came off next, followed quickly by your panties. “Already soaked for me,” his voice was rough and so were his fingers as he pushed your legs up and open wider, and delved into your heat, stoking the fire that had been building for days as he stretched you out. “Y-you say that like you haven’t been sporting a s-semi every time you’ve thought about me for the last-t four days. Oh fuck.” You whined as Joe wrenched his fingers free of you to dig through his bedside draw, ”No need to complain, gonna give you something better than my fingers in a second,” “Y’know your dick is in your pants, not the draws,” “Remember when a simple kiss could have you speechless? Fuck I miss that.” “What are you doing?” “Looking for a condom, swore I put them here.” “Are you clean? Cause I’m clean and on the pill and sick of waiting.” “You sure?” He asked already tugged his short and underwear off. “Yes, I’m sure. Just fuck m –,” you were cut off, breath catching in your throat as he thrust into you. “What was it you were saying about size? Seems I’m big enough to shut you up, finally.” And then he paused, swallowing thickly and squeezing his eyes shut as you both adjusted and revelled in the feeling.

The moment didn’t last long before he was taking you roughly, pushing gasps and whines from you with every snap of his hips. Neither of you were patient enough to slow down, desperate for a release from the energy that had pent-up with every flirtatious look and teasing word. “That - oh! - that the best you can do?” Joe didn’t bother to answer, just growled as he leaned over and moved one hand from your thigh to your throat. The tight squeeze of his fingers and the weight of his palm pressing into you made you clench down on his dick. He let out a low chuckle, “Knew you’d enjoy that. Been begging for it all morning.” You clutched at the sheets as he grabbed your ankle in his free hand and pulled your leg up, knee bent and foot resting over his shoulder. “Jesus,” he groaned as the change of position allowed him to sink deeper into you. All you could manage was a choked moan as he fucked you relentlessly, still squeezing your throat. He dropped his fingers to your clit, rubbing it in harsh circles that only made you moan more. “Please tell me you’re close,” he grunted. “Mmhm close, fuck Joe,” “Say that again,” “’m close,” “My name, say my name again,” You did one better, moaning his name as he released your throat completely. The rush of breath returning to you flooded your system making everything feel heightened, sending you careening into your orgasm. You chanted his name as you rode out your high and were still repeating it when he kissed you again, pulling out and following you over the edge, covering your stomach with his cum as your noses bumped together and you whined against his lips.

“Well,” you said, a little nervously, as he stood up and held out his hand to pull you up too. You felt a little unsteady as you stood, but Joe kept hold of your hand, his other reaching out to brush some of your hair behind your ear. “Yeah.” “Worth the wait?” “Absolutely.” He leaned in to kiss you softly, all traces of his previous mood gone. He was still standing close, foreheads almost touching when you softly said, “I gotta pee. And clean up,” waving a hand in front of your stomach. You both laughed as he let you go with a, “shit, yeah, of course,” and a lingering look. When you returned to the room he was waiting for you, bed covers draped over his lap as he leaned against the wall, a pillow shoved behind his back. His head was bent, attention focused on something in his hands though it was drawn back to you when you spoke. “So, that was something,” “Yeah, um, definitely something.” What’s that supposed to mean? You climbed into bed next to him, leaving a space between you as you made to lean against the wall like he was, blankets pulled a little higher to cover your chest. Instead he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pulled you into his side, shuffling closer so you could lean into him properly. “What you got there?” You pointed at the object that held his focus, a small package wrapped in brown paper. It crinkled as his fingers moved over it. “This,” he said, “was meant to be a goodbye present. I was going to give it to you on the last day we were both here as, umm, just like, a little, I don’t know, keepsake? It was going to come with a very funny note about how much fun I’d had fucking you into oblivion, or how your pussy was worth sneaking around behind your family’s backs or something like that. I haven’t written it yet, but it would have been fucking hilarious.” He paused, running his thumbs over the brown paper again, still looking at you, “Instead, I’d like to give it to you with an apology. For being such an ass.” “Joe, y-,” “I know you’re about to say I don’t have to, but I do. I was a dick. I knew you were specifically trying to keep your family uninvolved and I still did…. everything I did, and then I acted like a jerk to you today. So, I’m sorry.” He held out the package, but you didn’t take it straight away. “For the record, this is very sweet and you didn’t need to buy me anything…” “I know,” “… But I also wasn’t going to stop you from apologising. I’m really glad you did because last night sucked. But some of that was on me too. I was a bit of a dick too. But maybe not quite as much as you were,” Joe laughed and squeezed you tighter, “Will you just take the gift already so we can forget all that. It doesn’t matter.” You reached out for the package, sitting up a little straighter and unwrapping it slowly. The necklace and earrings he’d offered to buy you at the markets fell out onto your lap, a bright white and yellow plumeria on each item. “I went back and got them, that day at the market, after we separated. Do you like them?” “They’re lovely.” “I thought it’d be nice for you to have something physical you could keep, even after we leave.” “Thank you, I really love it,” you pulled him down into another kiss. “And again, they were going to be attached to a note about all the sex we, theoretically, had.” His face was serious as he spoke but there was a barely contained laugh in his voice that made you laugh too. “So, you’ve been imagining us having sex?” you swept the jewellery into your palm and leaned over to place it on the bedside table, “that demonstration just before, was that something you’d imagined?” “That was….not how I thought it’d go,” he said with a chuckle as he rubbed the back of his head, “not the first time anyway.” “How did you think it’d go?” “Less rough, for one. A bit clumsy and stuff but more…. intentional than it ended up being.” “So, not a spur of the moment thing after hours of winding each other up?” “Definitely not. I was going to be much more prepared. At least have a condom within easy reach. I found them by the way, I was looking in the wrong draw.” “You’re such a dork,” you giggled, shifting yourself to straddle his lap, looping your arms around his neck as his hands fell to your waist. “Think you’ve told me that before,” “Because it’s true. But I also imagined it’d go a bit differently.” “Different how?” “Like you said, less rough. I was also going to be on top, umm, because it’s been a while and I thought it’d be better if I was more in control.” “Y/N, shit,” Concern was written over his face but you cut him off before he could ask if you were okay. “No, it was good, Joe” you brought your hand to his cheek reassuringly, “really good. I’m happy with how it actually happened.”

He leaned in to kiss you again, smiling as he paused just before your lips touched. His breath was warm on your lips and you thought he probably would have said the same of yours, except that you’d stopped breathing. You closed the gap, a series of soft shallow kisses that gradually lingered longer, became deeper. Your chest felt tight and there were butterflies going wild in your gut. Perhaps it was the conversation you’d just had, vulnerable and candid, or just the dramatic shift from how you’d interacted earlier in the day. Whatever it was had you feeling more nervous than you had when he pushed you against the wall of the elevator or even when he tore off your clothes. He was more careful in the way he touched you, more deliberate, so you gathered he was feeling something akin to what you were. His fingertips rested softly against you, contrasted against the faint marks left from where he’d grabbed you so tightly before. Perhaps being so open had been a mistake. It wasn’t something you usually let happen after only knowing a guy for a few days. But, then again, it wasn’t like you had forever with Joe, just a few short weeks. He pulled you tighter against him, chests pressed together, and you tried to shut off your brain, stop overthinking and just focus on Joe and the moment at hand. It was slow this time. Before you’d been in a rush, desperate lust driving you to move fast and hard, spurring each other on. A feeling like if you didn’t hurry up and fuck you’d lose the chance. Even before that, when you’d kissed at the market, when you’d gotten so close in your bathroom, it was always rushed for fear of being caught out. But this time, there was none of that. That frantic need had mellowed. There was no clock to outrun, no chance of intrusion from well-meaning but unwanted relatives. You could take your time, soak each other in. And you did. Dragging your hands down over his shoulders until they rested against his chest, able to feel his heartbeat speed up under your palm. He brought his lips to your neck, pulling sighs and heavier breaths from you with each slight scrape of his stubble. Even when you finally rolled the condom down his shaft and lowered yourself onto him and he brought his hands up to cup your breasts and you moaned as you rode him, even then it was tender, almost delicate. A quiet sort of desire that drew you onwards until you were muffling your moans in his neck and quivering as you came undone

Afterwards you cleaned up and began to redress. Joe had slipped his underwear back on while you were in the bathroom, before collapsing back onto the bed. “What are you doing?” he said softly, watching as you picked up your shorts from where he’d thrown them into the floor. “You can’t expect me to walk back to my room half naked,” “I don’t go back to your room just yet.” “But my family…” “Are all busy,” he kneeled up and grabbed your hand and pulled you back towards the bed, “Your Mom and sister will still be occupied with the hula show and your Dad is probably having a nap or relaxing by the pool. We still have time.” “I don’t want them to see me leave here,” “They won’t. Just come back to bed for a little longer.” You worried at your lip for a few seconds, thinking it over. You’ve spent the last half a week wanting nothing more than to be in Joe’s bed, why are you in such a rush to leave? Finally, you nodded and dropped your shorts again, climbing back into bed in nothing but your shirt and panties. Joe wriggled closer, throwing his arm over you as you curled into him. “I’ll check if the coast is clear for you before you leave. And I’ll come up with some way to throw your mother off, okay?” “Thank you,” “Least I can do.” You shuffled around, getting comfortable, and lay your head against Joe’s shoulder. “Can I ask you something?” he said softly, “you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” “Sure, what is it?” “Your Mom mentioned a breakup, last night. I assume that’s got something to do with why,” he waved his hands around the both of you, “this is happening.” “Yeah, kind of. I guess I just need something casual at the moment, no strings, no labels, just fun.” “I can do fun,” “Yes, you’ve made that abundantly clear. What about you? There a particular reason you’ve had to come to Hawaii to get laid?” “You kid but that’s not actually that far from the truth. Started with a bad breakup more than a few months back. And I mean bad. Been in a bit of a dry spell ever since. One of my friends suggested I take a break after we were done with exams, just head off to somewhere new and use the time away to find myself or, whatever hippy bullshit he’s goes on about. But I figured, fuck it, why not go somewhere new.” “How’d you pick Hawaii?” “It was cheap and sunny. And there was a high chance of seeing some cute girls in bikinis.” “The three most important things to think about when booking a vacation.” “Well, seems to be working out well enough.” He let his hand slide down your side until it landed on your ass, squeezing it to make you laughed. “So what do you have in mind then? To throw Mom off I mean. Gonna make it a whole lot easier to sneak around if she’s not constantly watching us.” You talked quietly for a bit longer, plotting a potential plan, but, both worn out, it wasn’t long before your breathing evened out and you fell asleep with your head in the crook of Joe’s neck, his soft snores filing the otherwise silent room.

Waking up was hard, the nap not having lasted as long as you would have liked. Convincing yourself to get out of bed was harder still. You knew you had to so you could get ready to meet your family for dinner but the draw of staying cuddled up to Joe was very tempting. You hadn’t realised how much you’d missed the feeling of being so physically close to someone since you’d dumped Eddie. Plus, staying meant you got to make out some more and, really, that sounded like a wonderful way to spend the night. With a sigh you pushed yourself up and finished getting dressed. Joe stirred as you were slipping your shoes back on. “Where’re you going?” “Shower. And then down to dinner,” “What time is it?” “It’s like, six o’clock, just about.” “Shit, really? Guess you should go then.” “I’ll come back later, after Erin’s asleep,” you grabbed the jewellery Joe had given you from the bedside table, already planning on wearing it to dinner. “Pretty sure the last time you said you’d be back, you ended up ditching me to go drinking with your parents,” “Well if I don’t show up, you’ll know where I am. See you later.” “Wait!” Joe sat up suddenly, throwing back the covers “I said I’d help you sneak back.” “Stay in bed, I’m sure no one will see.” “No no no, I’ll check. Don’t want you getting mad at me again.” “I wouldn’t,” “You’ve withheld sex once before, I’m not risking it again, he laughed, throwing a shirt and shorts on, “besides, couldn’t let you leave without…” his lips were on yours in a heartbeat as he pulled you close. “That’s so unfair, making me wanna stay,” “Guess you’ll just have to make sure you come back then. Now wait here for my signal.” You chuckled as he slipped out the door, his footsteps treading slowly down the hall until he was in sight of your room. A moment later there was a knock at the door. You peeked out to find Joe, hand held up beside his face like a gun. He put a finger to his ear like he was listening to a hearing device, “Coast is clear. Safe to move. Go! Go! Go!” You laughed as you followed him quickly back down the hall, his finger gun drawn the whole way, holding it out as you rounded a corner. When you reached your room he waited until you’d pulled out your key before announcing, “The eagle is in the nest.” With a final glance around to double check you were definitely alone, you called him a dork again, leaned up to kiss him once more and then ducked into your room, grinning.

Dinner went slower than you wanted, but no one suspected you were lying when you said you’d spent the afternoon on the beach. Erin, unhelpfully, announced that she and your Mom had also been on the beach, but it was large enough and busy enough that it was reasonable for you not to have seen each other. There was also a question raised about your jewellery, but you covered by saying you’d bought it the day you bought Erin hers but had forgotten about it until that afternoon. Other than that the meal passed incident free. Afterwards you all made your way out to the pool to relax and have a drink or two. The only interruption was a brief lecture from your mother. From her position on a lounge, she caught sight of Joe heading towards the bar. If he’d been closer she probably would have called out to him, instead she suggested you go and get her a refill. Before you could do more than sigh and swing your legs off your own lounge chair, she threw out an arm to stop you. Joe was leaning against the counter of the bar, chatting up another girl. Her eyes narrowed as if she were trying to read their lips despite how far away she sat. She couldn’t miss it however when the girl wrote her number on a napkin and handed it to Joe. “Would you look at that. You know, this is what happens when you play hard to get Y/N. There is a time to make a man work for your attention, but a vacation is not it. The girls back home will be so disappointed for you.” You lay back down and tuned her out as much as you could, trying not to smile at how well the plan you’d hatched had worked. After that it was just killing time until you could go upstairs with Erin and wait for her to talk herself into exhaustion. Patiently, you listened to her babble about the tiki statue she’d decorated, pointing out all her artistic choices but refusing to let you pick it up off her bedside table for a closer look. When she finally did fall asleep you watched the clock tick for another fifteen minutes, just to make sure she was really out. Then you changed into your bikini and a robe and left the room as quietly as possible.

Joe answered after the first knock. “Should start calling you beaver,” you said as you stepped inside, noting the confused look Joe gave you, “because you’re so eager.” “Oh, my mind went…somewhere else entirely.” “Perv!” you laughed, giving him a playful slap on the shoulder. “Is it pervy to ask what you’ve got on under the robe?” “A little but I’ll let it slide.” His eyes raked you up and down as you slowly pulled the belt of your robe loose, letting it fall open. “You wore it,” he grinned, meeting your eyes briefly before lowering his gaze back to your scantily clad body. “Had to compete with the pool bar girl somehow,” slowly, you let the robe slip off your shoulders, falling to the floor in a heap. You lay a hand against Joe’s chest, walking him further into the room, “If you want I can make this quick, so you’ll be ready to meet her later.” He gulped, shaking his head, “I don’t think making this quick is going to be a problem.” “You don’t even know what I’m going to do yet,” you kept your eyes locked on his as you ran your fingers along the waistband of his shorts, sinking to your knees as you tugged them down along with his underwear. “Jesus,” he whimpered, watching closely as you spat into your palm before wrapping your hand around his cock. “You weren’t lying were you? So hard already. Guess I better get started then.” Keeping your eyes up, you gently began to kitten lick around his tip, gradually trailing your tongue further down the underside of his shaft and then dragging it back up to focus on his tip again. When you decided he was suitably worked up, his breathing heavy and uneven, you took him between your lips. His hand fell to the top of your head but he didn’t try to force you to take more of his dick, instead just rested it there as you set the pace. You bobbed up and down on his cock, deliberately going slow so you could adjust. Every so often you’d return to lavishing his head with kisses and licks before sinking back down and hollowing your cheeks. When you felt your jaw getting tired you pulled back, slowly working your hand over him instead. “I’m not gonna last much longer,” “I figured, from the why you’ve been panting and moaning.” “Can’t blame me, you’re very good at this.” “Well, I try. If you want I can try deepthroating you until you cum.” “Fuck, you can do that?” “It’s been a while, might require a position change but yeah I should be able to. You up for it?” “Yes, god yes. Where do you want me?” “Might be easiest if I lie on the bed.” “Sure, whatever you think is best.” You giggled at how earnest and excited he sounded as you took his offered hand to stand up again. You took a second to stretch your muscles, knees stiff from the rough carpet, before climbing onto the bed. “This gives me a little less control than before so if I need to stop I’ll tap you okay?” “Yeah, of course. I’ll start slow. One question though,” “Shoot,” “Can I choke you again?” “You mean while you’re fucking my throat? Yeah that sounds hot. Ready?” Joe nodded as you got as comfortable as you could be with your head hanging over the edge of the bed. You were reminded suddenly that this was the exact spot he’d fucked you hard after you’d come back from golf, except you were turned the other way around. A shiver running through you at the thought. When you were ready you gave Joe a quick tap to let him know and then tried to focus on staying relaxed as he slipped back into your mouth. You could feel his hand resting against your throat again, not squeezing, just gently tracing his fingers and thumb up and down your neck as he slowly worked his cock deeper. The sensation of his fingers helped you stay calm and focused as you held onto his hips, controlling his movements as much as possible. As he gradually fucked you deeper, drawing extra gags from you, he brought both hands to your throat, thumbs almost overlapping towards the base of your neck, squeezing harder the longer and faster he fucked you. “Fuck, Y/N,” he panted, “can feel my dick moving in your throat. Under my hands. Holy shit that’s hot. Can see it too, when I move my hands away.” He did exactly that, releasing your throat so he could watch his cock move under your skin. It wasn’t long before his hands were back in place though, pressing down on the bulge. You hummed as you felt him tighten his hold a little more. “I’m, fuck, I’m g-gonna, gonna cum.” You squeezed his hip a little tighter to let him know it was okay. It was all the invitation he needed, holding himself deep in your throat and squeezing tight as he moaned through his release. When he finally released your throat and stepped back you rolled onto your stomach, coughing a little as you tried to get your breathing back to normal. “Are you okay?” he asked, rubbing your back as the coughs subsided. “Yeah, I’m great.” “You’re fucking incredible is what you are,” he tilted your chin up so he could kiss you softly, “But you’re going to have to stop wearing that bikini for the rest of your vacation because, after that, I’m not gonna be able to see you in it without cumming in my pants.” You chuckled as he sat down next to you, leaning your forehead on his shoulder. “Just give me a couple minutes to collect myself and I’ll return the favour,” “No rush, I’m a little worn out myself. You still got that vodka?” “Yeah, umm, think it’s in the wardrobe.” You patted his leg as you stood, head still a little dizzy from having hung upside down, and made your way to where he’d indicated, finding the bottle almost as soon as you opened the door. “Balcony?” He nodded as he pulled his pants back on, following you out. This time you both opted for the chairs, rather than sliding to the floor, but you pulled them so they were next to each other, facing out across the ocean. You unscrewed the lid and took a swig of the vodka, before handing the bottle over. For a minute you sat in silence, listening to the waves against the shore, passing the bottle between you. Until Joe’s voice cut through the quiet. “So, what’s on the cards for tomorrow? Your Mom booked another activity that you’ll be stuck doing?” “Nah, don’t think so. Well, I think I’ve been uninvited from whatever she had planned. She’s pretty disappointed about you chatting up other girls and me not being visibly upset by it. Don’t think she can stand to look at me right now.” you laughed. “Does that mean you’ll be free all day then?” “Yeah. I’ll have to double check in the morning in case she’s calmed down, but I should be.” “Cool.” “Any requests for what I should wear?” “ Hmmm,” he leaned in, making a face like he was thinking hard, “don’t really mind as long as it’s easy to remove.” You thought he was going to kiss you again but instead he grabbed the bottle from your hand while you were focused on his lips, leaning back as soon as he hand it in his grasp and taking a sip. “Fuck you, I was drinking that,” “Think you were a little too distracted to drink. Besides I’m cutting you off again.” “Bullshit, I’ve barely had any,” “No, but I want you on the bed.”  You giggled as he grabbed your hand and practically pulled you out of your chair, leading you back inside. The vodka was almost dropped in his eagerness to get you out of your clothes again, but you caught it in time, leaving it safely standing on the bedside table as he pulled at the ties of your bikini top. As soon as it hit the floor Joe grabbed your hips and turned you towards the bed, giving your ass a small spank as you hurried to lie down. “We should talk about what we’re into,” he said nonchalantly as he followed you into the middle of the bed, kneeling between your parted legs. “What, like bands and books and shit?” “No dummy, kinks and stuff. Since we’re working on a strict time limit, we should probably discuss it, make sure we’re both having fun.” “Okay, now?” “Later, when I’m not eating you out.” You laugh stuttered into a whine as he dropped his head to press a kiss to your bikini bottoms, right over your clit.

He made you cum twice with his mouth and then once again on his cock, fucking you into the mattress while your nails left marks along his back. After, while your legs stopped shaking and your heartbeat slowed back to normal, you and Joe talked some more. He lay on his stomach, head propped up in his hands, looking up at you as he explained that you absolutely could start calling him Beaver, since he felt he’d earned the nickname now. Your fit of laughter hitched as you noticed the clock on his wall. “Shit, is that really the time? I should go,” “Already? You’re ruining my plans Y/N,” “What plans? I don’t believe you’ve ever made a plan in your life,” “Excuse you! I’ll tell you, I had big plans. Plans that involved cuddling you while we drank some more.” “As fun as that sounds,” you chuckled, “if I stay, I’ll fall asleep here. And if I fall asleep here it means I won’t be in my bed in the morning. And if I’m not in my bed in the morning I’ll be in for another lecture about looking after my sister and a whole bunch of questions I don’t want to answer.” “That’s fair, I guess.” “Besides, I’ll be back here tomorrow…or today I guess.” “Okay,” he exhaled the word against your stomach as he left a kiss there, “But I’m going to have to fuck you, hard, to make up for it.” “Oh, of course. Wouldn’t expect anything less. Though maybe something more, a spanking or something.” “You’d be into that?” “Mmhmm,” “We really need to talk about what else we’d be into.” “Tomorrow, when I come back, we can make a list and then check them all off.”

True to his word, when you returned to his room the next morning he greeted you with coffee he’d ordered from room service, and a discussion about which kinks turned you on and where each of your limits lay. But once you had it all sorted out it took almost no time at all for him to have you face down ass up on the bed, pounding you through two solid orgasms as he slapped your ass. And then, after a little recovery, he had you again, a leg wrapped around his waist and your hands pinned to the wall above your head. It seemed that, now you’d actually been together, it was all you wanted to do. In the moments when he wasn’t touching you, you could almost have said you missed it. Missed the warmth of his hands, the taste of his mouth on yours, the way he could make you feel with just his fingers let alone any other part of him. He strongly hinted he wanted to have you again, perched on the bathroom sink like he would have the night he came to your room had you not been interrupted, except that you had to leave. As part of your mother’s punishment for letting Joe get away you were once again on babysitting duty. The whole afternoon was to be spent keeping your eye on Erin while your parents joined a couples only hike. “Honestly, I’m starting to think this was about more than being starved for gossip. Wouldn’t be surprised if she’d convinced herself that we’d miraculously discover we were going to the same college and end up dating for real. That sort of romance novel bullshit. Probably had the wedding planned already.” “Hey, we knew we’d have to steal moments between activities and stuff. At least we can do the whole running-into-each-other-by-accident routine while your parents are away. I’ll help you watch Erin.” “That’s lovely of you, but you don’t have to.” “Y/N what else am I gonna do? Plus I like Erin. She’s a sweet kid, for the most part.” “You will have to keep your hands to yourself though. She spots anything and she’ll go blabbing straight away.” “I think I can restrain myself for a few hours,” “Really? Not been doing so great at the whole restraint thing the last couple of days.” “Fair point. Maybe you should give me an incentive to behave,” “Well if you don’t I might just have to tie you to the bed and edge you for a while,” “I said give me an incentive, not tempt me into misbehaving. You keep making suggestions like that and I’ll finger you by the pool just to make sure you follow through.”

That afternoon was a strong indication of how the rest of the vacation was going to go. You sat on the edge of the pool, watching Erin as she tried to prove she could do a handstand in the water. After you’d been there for about fifteen minutes Joe wandered over, both of you making polite small talk - nice to see you, what have you been up to since golf. Erin didn’t suspect anything, just yelled at Joe to watch her do a handstand before diving back underwater. Joe sat beside you, fingers almost but not quite touching as your feet bumped together below the surface. You chatted as vague acquaintances pushed together by repeat accidental meetings, though if anyone had bothered to listen in they would have heard Joes lewd comments about how your bikini turned him on and your downright obscene response asking if he preferred you in the bikini or naked and spread out on his bed. It was playful and flirty and led to another night of making near pornographic noises as checked off a few more of the kinks you both liked. And that was the routine you found yourselves falling into. You’d spend time with your family during the day, flirt with Joe whenever the opportunity arose, and then spend a good few hours of the night fucking each other’s brains out. On the floor and the bed and with your hands holding tight to the balcony railing. Occasionally, when you had adequate warning, Joe would end up on the same activity your family was doing, making polite small talk with your father as your mother tried to subtly convince him to make a move on you. You found it incredibly nerve wracking but, more than once you took the chance to fool around a little when you became separated from the group. Teasing touches as you both leaned against the same fence to admire a view, stolen kisses behind the bus, and once a quick handjob while you were meant to be snorkelling with everyone else.

On days when your family didn’t do much more than lounge around on the beach you’d make an excuse and disappear for a few hours, and then return hoping you didn’t look to fucked out for them to notice. You used every excuse you could think of – a spa session you’d booked the night before, interest in seeing a hula show or joining a yoga class, or just a desire to get out of the sun for a bit. You even disregarded everything Joe had told you about faking sick being a bad idea, pretending you had period cramps and a headache to get you another whole day to yourself. Joe came to your room that time, letting you pull him into the shower laughing. You’d had to slam your hand over his mouth as the room door opened and Erin yelled something about forgetting to grab the sunscreen before she hurried out again. It was a close call but also a huge turn on. You’d been right when you told Joe sneaking around would make things more fun.

Sometimes you’d catch sight of him and leave your family on the beach or by the pool under the guise of getting a new drink and instead end up with your tongue in Joe’s mouth, practically dry humping around the corner from where they sunbathed and joked around. When they asked what took you so long, you’d tell them it was so busy you’d lost their spot in the crowd. Joe never seemed to mind the sly nature of your meetings or the need to be quick and quiet. He’d spot you and wait for a moment when he could come up behind you and and whisper something about how it was a struggle to keep his hands to himself when you looked so good. Then he’d tell you to meet him in the lobby bathroom or whatever other secluded spot was nearby. When you arrived, he’d waste no time in pushing you to your knees or bending you over with your hands against a wall while he pulled your panties to the side. Whatever was easiest and fastest. The first time you’d been a little surprised, whining as he pushed you against a wall and kissed you hard. “Jesus Joe, I’m coming back to yours in like four hours, you couldn’t wait?” “Those shorts you’re wearing are so fucking hot, can’t blame me for wanting your cunt so bad.” He only got more intent on pulling you into dark corners and private areas when he saw you wearing the jewellery he bought you. You took to wearing the necklace and earrings constantly because every time Joe saw you in them it seemed to turn him on, something about it proving you were his to use, and it’d inspire another mindblowing round of sex, only made more satisfying by the days of stolen moments being as good as edging to work you both up.

It was everything you’d wanted when the idea of a holiday romance first occurred to you. Days spent relaxing, taking in the sun and the sea air and exploring a stunningly beautiful part of the world. Nights spent indulging in casual sex that wasn’t just a laugh but also made you feel incredible, with someone you enjoyed talking to and spending time with. Just what you needed to truly put your breakup and everything about that relationship behind you. It wasn’t ideal, what with having to dodge your family constantly but keeping it secret meant it was just yours and there was something very satisfying about that. All your previous relationships, no matter how brief, had been shared with others. Your mother telling everyone about your first kiss, your friends making you spill details about one-night stands and more long-term partners.  But everything that happened between you and Joe was just for the two of you. The distance stopped your friends from getting involved and you were doing everything in your power to keep it away from your family. And that felt really good. Of course, as soon as you got back to college that would change. Enough time would have passed that you wouldn’t have any problems answering your friends demands to know if you’d seduced anyone, Justin Timberlake or otherwise. You’d spill the beans about everything, of course. After all, they deserved to know how right they’d been.

[1800-seungshine]

acts of kindness.

group: txt. member: choi yeonjun. genre(s): fluff, highschool!au. summary: a bandaid and an umbrella. who knew that a simple act of kindness one fateful day could lead to a blooming friendship and possibly even more. (bullet-point format) word count: 1.5k

note: what better way than to publish a scenario as a 100th post! this is my first time writing since last year and this time it’s not wanna one but about one of the txt boys. i’m very nervous about how it turned out ooft. hopefully, i didn’t butcher it too much since i haven’t watched a lot of videos to grasp yeonjun’s personality lmao. anyways, thank you for the likes, follows and reblogs i’ve been getting :’)) i appreciate it very much aheh. happy readings!

ok wow i’m so rusty 

bear with me y’all lmao 

i know that yeonjun would have probably graduated by now but let’s pretend that he didn’t lmao teleport yourselves to last year aight

choi yeonjun is known around the school for being one of the coolest and nicest seniors around.

he’s popular with all the girls, guys and even the teachers love him.

he’s involved in the dance club but also an honorary member in the music club. he’s the guy they call when they need someone to sing or rap.

basically,, sis is your talented all rounder smh how rude is he amirite

you were also a senior like yeonjun except you weren’t as famous around the school and you’re more involved in academic clubs. 

there are a large number of students who know you but that’s because you often help out with tutoring.

the teachers are quite fond of you as well since you’re quick to jump when they need help, even if they didn’t think they needed help.

overall, you’re a helpful person. 11/10 good citizen yknow.

but due to being in different classes, you don’t know yeonjun that well and vice-versa; you two only pass each other in the hallways.

hence you recognise his face but you don’t really know his name.

[inserts jungkook’s “i know her face but i don’t her name”]

you don’t know much about the social circles around the school since you usually find yourself cooped up in the library during break, helping out younger students with their assigned work

and if tutoring wasn’t the case, the academic clubs you’re in always seem to have endless lunch meetings.

look at me trying to fix a plot hole lmao

but you have heard the name yeonjun thrown around here and there

you just shrug it off though since you don’t know who the guy is or what he looks like.

your paths never really cross anyways.

but that won’t be the case for long :^D

it all started when yeonjun found himself in the school library, printing his assignment last minute (it was due the next class). 

being in such a rush, what yeonjun didn’t realise was that he gave himself a paper cut

“ack!” he feels a jolt of pain, causing him to stand there as he flails his hand around, a pained expression on his face as he internally screams because hey it’s free real estate the library

you were going over to the printer to collect the documents which were you but you momentarily stopped as you watched this dude making a bunch of pained expressions in a single minute, grumbling to himself.

from his endless mutterings, all you could make out was “why does paper hurt so much? why is the world forsaking me? i hate this library.” 

we love a dramatic boi

stifling a laugh, you walked over to check up on him. 

“hey are you ok?” 

realising someone had approached him, yeonjun pulls himself together as he clears his throat. 

“oh yeah, i’m good. just a paper cut, nothing major. i can handle it.” 

doubting his statement, you rummage in your skirt pocket for a bandaid and after successfully finding one, you hand it to him. 

“i experience paper cuts quite a lot. more than i want, really.” you tell him, chuckling a little bit, “here you go, just so it won’t irritate you as much.”

he looks down at the bandaid you gave to him, staring at the sky blue background and the drawing of a polar bear lying down. 

“what a cute bandaid.” yeonjun mumbles, chuckling in amusement at the design before he looks up, his eyes immediately meeting yours as he sends a smile. “thanks...” 

you reciprocate with a smile, “no worries.” you say to him before walking off. 

left in a small trance, yeonjun finally snaps out of it as he smacks his forehead. 

“i forgot to ask what her name was!”

time skip yeet 

it was nearing the end of another school day and of course being the last period of classes, you couldn’t help but to zone out for certain sections of it.

you stared out the window again, taking note of how the huge grey clouds that formed earlier began to cover the sky and rain started to fall.

as you watched the rain transition from light sprinkling and now pelting down, the school bell rings as realisation hits you. 

you didn’t bring your umbrella today. 

releasing a tiny groan, you shut your eyes in frustration before shaking your head at yourself. 

“seems like we’re walking home in the rain today.” you say to yourself as you pack your things, placing them in your bag. 

as you near the school doors, you briefly stop your tracks to take off your blazer, placing it over you as you let out a sigh, “well there’s no other choice.” 

with your blazer providing some sort of shelter, you exit out of the school gates in a rush. 

what you didn’t know was that someone was waiting for you.

choi yeonjun to be exact. 

he notices you power walk through the large groups of students walking together, with a blazer above your head. 

and suddenly he finds himself trying to catch up with you, “hey!”

luckily for yeonjun, his yelling caused you to halt and his long strides helped him block your path. 

forgetting his original plan of thanking you and asking for your name, he takes your blazer and places it in your arm whilst shoving the umbrella he had in your other hand. “take it, you’ll get sick.” 

“i- but,, what-” you fumbled, taken by surprise due to his sudden presence and gesture.

but before you could utter a coherent sentence, yeonjun had already turned the other direction, running in the pouring rain. 

time skip bleep bloop.

the next day, you made sure you went to school earlier than usual. 

you stopped by a convenience store on the way to school, purchasing a box of chocolate milk as a way of saying thanks to the guy who helped you out the previous day.

unsure of what time yeonjun would arrive, you aimlessly walked back and forth the hallways where you usually see him.

with the chocolate milk in one hand and the umbrella in the other, you take a look at the flower patterned design on it, grinning at it in amusement.

you chortled in amusement when you saw it last night, wondering how a guy who seemed so cool had such an umbrella. 

as you direct your gaze away from the umbrella, you look up to see a figure walking down the hallway. 

“hey umbrella guy!” you let out a small yell, waving your arm as you were sure of the familiar face.

hearing your voice, yeonjun then jogs lightly to you with a cheeky grin plastered on his face. 

“oh, hey bandaid girl.” 

you raise a brow at the nickname, smiling softly. “bandaid girl?” you repeat before snapping out of the thought at how cute the nickname was.

getting to your original point, you hand him the things in your hands, “this is for you!”

yeonjun slightly tilts his head to the side, looking down at the umbrella and the chocolate milk.

“just a simple gesture to say thanks since i didn’t get the chance to do so yesterday.” 

he lets out a small chuckle, placing his bag down to unzip his bag, putting the umbrella back before pulling out a carton of strawberry milk.

standing upright, yeonjun places the strawberry milk in your hands. “seems like we had the same idea, i wanted to say thanks for the bandaid but i didn’t get the chance either.” 

taking the strawberry milk from him, you let out a soft laughing as you sheepishly scratch your cheek out of habit. 

“this is quite strange, i don’t really know your name so i don’t know whether to call you umbrella guy or to ask what your name is before thanking you.” 

forming a wide grin, yeonjun stretches out his hand, “the name’s choi yeonjun but umbrella guy also works i guess. nice to meet you.” 

“oh you’re yeonjun. oh goodness, i should have known.” you say with realisation, hitting your forehead lightly before replying with a similar grin, “i’m y/n but bandaid girl’s just as fine.” 

you take his outstretched hand, shaking it as firmly as possible, sending a sweet smile at his way. 

“it’s very nice to meet you, yeonjun and thanks for the strawberry milk.” 

“likewise, y/n. thanks for the chocolate milk as well, i appreciate it.” 

having twenty minutes of free time, the two of you open your cartons of milk as you walk around the school, spending some time chatting with one another.

“so you’re choi yeonjun, the popular senior who everyone thinks is cool right?” 

“yeap, and you must y/n the smart tutor senior?”

“smart isn’t the proper word but i do tutor the younger grades.”

“wait— hang on! what do you mean by everyone thinks i’m cool? i am cool.”

“well, that’s what i first thought too when i heard stories about you but your flower patterned umbrella ruined it.” 

“ok hold on,,, that was my mom’s.” 

“uhuh ok.” 

“what? you don’t believe me?? :’(”

as the day slowly begins, the empty hallways begin to be filled with laughter and voices of two people who never really knew the impact of their benevolence until now. 

[sunshineparkers]

@vosska <3

a compilation of the golden™ moments. i have more but you can only attach ten images i think rip. 

oh man, my boy lee. it’s been a year bro. a year since 

LMAO

all jokes aside you’ve literally been a blessing to my painstakingly atheist life (i’m not atheist but it makes a good joke). you’re someone that i truly consider my best friend. i don’t know how i’m gonna say all of this because there’s so much to say and knowing me i won’t be able to say it all coherently :( 

let me start off by saying yes this is gonna be one hell of a emotional ramble, kid.  

i love you so much and even though it’s only been a year, i feel like i have known you for so much longer. you inspire me everyday to be a better person, and cheer me up when i am down (that mom intuition), support me in all that i do, and you just are the best person and friend i could ever ask for...dude. you’re like my second mom, in that you give me advice whether it’s friends, school, driving, boys, whatever. i feel so much more at ease when i talk to you, because everything i’m going through you’ve gone through and you know and just being there for me is such a blessing. because of our age gap, i feel like i can confide in you more and rely on the things you tell me. not to mention, when i’m sad, after talking to you, i always feel better. we don’t even have to address what i’m sad about, just us talking makes me feel loads better. our conversations are never forced and literally as i typed this, you texted me asking “how was your day” and just that you do that is adorable. i love hearing about your day and the things in your life, and i love sharing about my day and my life and our relationship is so chill i love.  now school...whoo boy ok. you have literally been a god send this year in terms of my mental sanity and grades. i don’t think i would’ve gotten through my first year of high school without you. in the beginning of the year when we didn’t have eachother’s phone numbers, i remember being excited to come home just so i could message you on tumblr lmaooooo. i remember our first phone call which was a w re ck™. i was on a bus going to volleyball with all my friend’s screaming in my ear and the connection was so bad, but it was the highlight of my week.  you’ve kept me sane and stable, when i was about to fall apart from ap or essays or some stupid shit. you would roast my teachers with me, calm me down, and help me out, even though you had your school load aND were an hour ahead of my time zone. the biggest thank you i want to give you is about helping me edit. you seriously don’t know how fucking grateful i am of you. without fail you would seriously and fully help me edit and write my thesises. every thesis i wrote with your help got the highest score, and every paper that came with it did too. i remember when i wrote that speech worth 25% of my grade and you stayed up late helping me rehearse it over facetime even though you were so tired. you were folding laundry while i was over here going “aNd sO THe cONflICT OF thE 2016 ElecTIOn haS BEEn baD FoR AMericA BECause damn fucKING TRUMP”. and that time i wrote that short story and you read it and loved it and it made me so happy and confident <3 i could go on, but this is long enough as it is, thank you for everything you’ve done for me this school year. it makes me sad that i couldn’t have been a better friend to you when you were stressed and feeling down.  ok damn you’re so supportive. like i’m like “ya boy made a smoothie today” and you’ll be like 

i love you for that. 

besides being there emotionally, mentally, and being my professional paper-editor, you’re just the best best friend any one could ever ask for. you’re so fun and adorable and nice, and funny and just so lovely to hang out with. i can be myself around you, i can have fun, i can love the things i do without apologizing (love me some ring ding dong by shinee), and most importantly i feel happy and i feel loved. 

i love you so much, youre amazing, and i’m sorry this is so long damn i did not expect it to be this long (ok yeah i did because i looove you) and you’re precious and i hope we stay friend until we’re dead, and then in hell we’ll be friends. when you write your first book i better get it autographed ok. ok

-your little sister from missouri,  anish

[ranger-kellyn]

Thanks for writing the Phaesphoriashipping content bc there is so little, and I think you might be the only one left. I love you so much. Don’t know if that’s weird. Just wondering what got you into this ship and what inspires you to write about this rare pair.

It’s been my absolute pleasure!! ;v;

What got me into the ship? Admittedly, I have NO clue what precisely drew me to the pairing.  I’ve always favored Cynthia since she was introduced.  She was just always my Number One. 

Then along came Diantha in gen 6 and I was just absolutely smitten.  I roleplayed her for a time back in 2014-15 I think, and with how little attention she got in the games and anime it honestly gave me MORE to work with.  With less things canonically to go off of, there’s less things to essentially “prove me wrong”.  If that makes any sense.  

As for what keeps me writing for them, I think they’re characters who I can just. Generally adjust for whatever I’m wanting in the moment.  

Second Chances was inspired by Style - Taylor Swift, and Portugal - Walk The Moon.  They were some of my warm up and cool down songs on my old workout playlist.  Style was about reconnecting with an ex, and the lines from Portugal, “One summer turns into ten summers, one love turns into ten others, but this memory is still with me” demonstrates time apart, and just those two things kept building this story in my mind while I would be at the gym.  

I knew I wanted them to be older, have a rough break-up, and learn to bridge that relationship back together.  I wanted something slice of life, like you would see in a cheesy hallmark movie.  (In that story I also vent some of my issues with my own mother through diantha and well venting through her is a bit of My Thing aha) 

Getaway Car was obv inspired by Getaway Car - Taylor Swift, as well as most of the whole reputation album.  The explanation Blair gives in Ch. 2 was very much based off my own inspiration for the story. 4:32am on the dot, two days after the album dropped, I woke up with a story in mind for Getaway Car.  I knew it was a phaesporia story, and from there it was just a matter of piecing things together into something coherent.  

I also wanted to put my own personal knowledge of filming to use.  My mom had produced a few small films, been an extra on the show Nashville a bunch of times, and played some small roles in other local films.  I’ve been an extra in one of her films, and I’ve been on a bunch of the sets she’s been on, and I’ve been around people who have done big projects.  I’m not super knowledgable, but I probably know more than you’re average person, and when I do have questions, I have a range of people to ask.  

Though, I guess, at the end of the day I just think they’re great characters who happen to look even better next to each other, and I just have so many story ideas for them it Haunts Me lmao