#i had so many issues with this fuckass show

[leapinarmadillo]

i'm judging everyone, especially self proclaimed mj fans, who says the 2nd act Thriller staging was amazing in mj the musical. i was pleasantly surprised that the first act only had a snippet of Thriller within a medley (which btw WBSS was great). that was nice. we all know Thriller, so referencing it almost in passing like that felt like a nice nod and good use of time. well that got completely undone by the 2nd act. which i thought was in horrible taste. why are we dragging this legend's corpse around like this. they thought they did something really significant with the themes there. they thought they came up with some artsy excuse to (over)use Thriller. 1. it was incoherent 2. even if you can justify it, i don't care, i thought it was way too dark (in a serious, unfun way) and disrespectful to michael

[manwiththemagic]

I hate mfs who infantlize Dean. "My lil babyyyy 🥺 omg he was expected to raise Jack after Jack killed cas and—" DIE. DIE IN A PLANE CRASH.

DEAN IS A GROWN ASS MAN. yes he was sad about cas', yes he had the right to be upset but not at JACK?? it's so obvious it's not jacks fault your actually insane.

And babying an ABUSIVE man is insane. Yes I do love deans character but I can admit he was being toxic. Also there was way more going on than just cas??

Like his mf MOM was gone?? Crowley (a good ally) was gone, Kelly (an innocent person) was gone. Obviously cas was one of the few people he actually gaf about but OMFG.

THOSE destiel shippers just irck me. I myself fw destiel but not like this??

these are the same MFS that are like "Dean and cas' and their baby Jack🥺🥺🥺" I DESPISE YOU. because no. Just no. Dean was NOT a father to jack. You know he he WAS a father too??? LITERALLY ANY OTHER KID IN THE SHOW. PICK ONE.

like you want destiel as dads?? Okay. Claire is right there pal. Because Jack is sastiels kid, and Claire is destiels and I STAND on that fact.

Idk how many fans there are like this but MANNNNN. this is why Tumblr is better than twitter/fuckass x. Tumblr algorithm save me. Save me Tumblr algorithm.

ONE MORE THING.

I hate when people see smth to do with deans bond w/ Sam and just THROW IT AWAY and give it to Dean and cas. LIKE NO. No. Dean and Sam are the MAINNNN mfs of this show. Sam and deans relationship is legit why everything happens. Not in a wincest way or anything but GODDDDD.

gang be so fr.

OR. OR. WHEN PEOPLE PRETEND CAS DOESN'T GAF ABOUT SAM. COME ONNNNNN. They were friends gang. Cas talking about how he won't let Sam self sacrifice and about how he understands him now after being human.

OR cas' happiness when sam comes back w/ his soul in s6?? He obviously cares about sam. Sure you can bring up the destiel confession like "oh but he loves Sam bc of Dean and—" stfu. They still care about each other. Tfw all care about each other and it's upsetting when people throw that away ☹️☹️

Anyways thanks for reading. Uhhhh goodbye to my tedtalk?? I feel like shit RN and idk what to do about it. LMAOOO

Kill myself?? <<<<< Rant about non important spn issue online!!

[1343-40]

ok i'm insane in the brain thinking about rosie's place in the mota hockey au cuz. yk.

actually talked about this w @swifty-fox earlier tonight but i need this on my fuckass tumblr

i'm imagining that his career started pretty roughly--getting skipped over in the draft because he didn't hit his growth spurt at that point and his stats weren't good enough for teams to risk picking up a guy as small as him. he's doesn't have something as crazy as a 50 goal season with his USHL team or anything but he's a solid forward, yet all the teams see is him being 5'9" and way too light

he does get picked up in the third round, but it's by a team that already has a pretty good lineup, so he plays one or two games in the pre-season and gets sent down to the ahl affiliate for that entire first year. he's a pretty optimistic guy, so he's not particularly broken up about it--he makes friends with his teammates, he works on his game, he finally hits that growth spurt and puts on weight he was lacking to really afford to play in the NHL

eventually he does get called up in his second year, a couple times at that, but it's not nearly enough for him to get properly developed to play in the show. UNTIL the team gets so many injuries the management have no choice but to call him and a few other guys up to salvage the rest of that season. he kind of gets going on the third line, puts up a couple goals, puts up more than a couple assists, gains confidence, but it's clear there's no place in the lineup for him once the guys he's replacing go off LTIR--maybe he doesn't click with his lineys as smoothly as the front office hoped, maybe it's just harder for him to get used to the big boy league, especially thrown into the fray like that, but either way the management finds him lacking. at that point all the goodwill he's had is quickly running out and he is frustrated that they just won't let him play, won't even throw him a bone and put him on the fourth line

he gets placed on waivers and the expansion team (WHATEVER THE FUCK WE'RE CALLING THEM IN THIS AU. winnipeg fuckin jets) scoops him up bc their gm is smart like that and they see the potential in him, plus they need all the help they can get to fluff up the roster with solid guys. and he plays the second and third line at first, but then their coach (btw is it harding or?.. lol) mixes up the lines and rosie gets placed with buck and curt and boom it just fuckin clicks baby. it just fuckin works. he secures his place on first line that season

he's definitely putting up more assists than goals--he settles into his role of the playmaker and gets going, plus he seems like a total giver to me. like, his biggest issue is probably not shooting the damn puck enough. but he is where he needs to be for buck or curt or whoever it is that's wearing the right jersey to slam it home, and it's just good fuckin hockey

Also probably not a good chirper. he tries though. he tries. got into One fight in his entire career that he lost but boy he sure went down swinging. makes sure to keep contact with all his previous teammates he's befriended and goes out with them whenever the team comes to their city. nobody in the locker room lets him put on his music because he puts on shit like wes montgomery and herbie hancock

[fortemelody]

i was visiting chicago last weekend and i walked around and found a comic shop. i’ve been trying to find a place that sold archie sonic comics (becus i’m a collector even of subjectively bad and not cannon media) and i happen to find a handful so i was super excited! i picked up 3 of them.

it was issue 30, 41, and the knuckles spin-off 14.

what’s so special about this you may ask?

the first two are relatively normal. knuckles 14 however is the issue where charmy’s friend (mello) gets a laced chili dog from a carnival stand and proceeds to overdose on LSD -oh i’m sorry “lemon sundrop dandelion”- and dies (and then the chaotix eventually overdose too but live obviously)

i have watched way too many archie sonic youtube review videos and so when i realized that i had found that specific issue i almost lost my shit. i treated this like it was some rare collectors item that the world has never seen. i legit almost screamed. in reality this is just another horrible pender’s story that was worth a whopping 4 dollars. but listen y’all THIS SHIT SHOW OF A COMIC IS SPECIAL TO ME IN A COMEDIC WAY OKAY ☹️☹️☹️

i have yet to read it becus it’s been a hectic week but when i do i’m going to curl up by the fireplace, relax, and absolutely laugh my ass off.

OKAY NVM DID SOME RESEARCH AND APPARENTLY ITS A 3 PART COMIC AND THE SET UP (THE PLOT THAT I JUST DESCRIBED) WAS ACTUALLY IN 13 GODDAMIT there’s way too much lore to remember help me and why did this fuckass story have to go on for so long??? i’m sure some kid in the 90s was just dying to know the ending of the LSD caper their parents definitely wouldn’t approve of them reading 😭

[allthedamnlove]

i agree that drew and fiona had way more chemistry than madison and rudy😭😭

jj and kie were just like there…. if that makes sense?? like nothing about them gave couple. meanwhile rafe was on his knees with a ring for sofia🙂‍↕️

also the whole riara thing is like not it lmfao, like madison said kiara would not be kiara if she was with rafe so if they really make a romantic connection happen between them not only would it ruin her character but it would not make sense imo

i’m all for the partners in crime duo and going after revenge but for them to all of a sudden want each other in 1 season would throw the whole show off

rofia endgame or the writers will not know peace for the rest of their lives idk🙂‍↕️

See that's the thing it's like the end of mockingiay where katniss says that she doesn't need the fire from Gale but needs peace that peeta gives. Rafe needs love from a normal woman who's been in love with them for nearly 2 years...not a heartbroken girl looking for revenge

Oh Jiaras are 👌close to killing rudy Elaine and the pates so if they put rafe and kiara you will probably see the pates dead or something. I think what they meant by rafe and kies relationship being explored more is that they will find each other in violence and revenge. I'm so happy that kie gets to explore herself in the final season. I'm so fucking sick of rudys unprofessional ass ruining the entire show. So I want madison to get the attention full front and center. No men around her.

Also rafe might have hastily broke up with sofia but his ass is soo going to regret it. He has INSANE attachment issues and so he would want closure WHICH MEANS ANGST FOR US.

And also if anyone comes for sofia I won't hesitate to deck them cuz I'm sick and tired of everyone victim blaming sofia. Like sHe BeTrAyEd HeR BRO HE KILLED PEOPLE. And again a number one hypocrite cuz HE KNOWS that he has done bad shit yet broke up with her OVER THE PHONE. LIKE BE FUCKING RIGHT

I feel like one of the pates really really like rofia and also the confirmation by the directors further confirmation that their story is not over.

Oh I will take a pitchfork and go rafe s2 on all of their asses if they come for my ship. So they better watch their asses.

Also the body doubles for the beach scene in MOROCCO CTFU. Meanwhile drew carrying fiona across the beach for the enduro scene YOU CANNOT MAKE THIS UP. Yea so clearly we can see a difference in chemistry.

If the obxanon is true (I don't trust them) then the dire nearly dry ass chemistry in ep 6 to ep 9 must be because ep10 was filmed first after it. So naturally mads was pissed at rudy but at the same time....they both should have been professional and atleast showed some chemistry even if jjs dying. Its the fan favourite ship, both the writers and mads and rudy atleast should have taken it to a higher level in the scenes if jj was going to die. But nope, they were acting like they didn't even know each other LMAO. Its just very very sad like jj is an amazing character and I'll say that rafe and jj are kinda cut from the same cloth so I would have loved to see how their relationship evolved. But that's the thing with these fuckass 10eps we see no emotional development between the characters. The main reason why rafe and sofia seems "weird" (by the way they are wrong and don't enjoy life enuff) is that the editors cut so many scenes that it feels disconnected.

But yea again I wish and wish I see rafe crying his ass off at the wedding with sofia wearing an insane wedding gown with Valerie as the flower girl and mads as one of the bridesmaids

[inplodinggofer616]

the big G in the sky knew I'd be much too mighty if I had claws and fangs as a physical motif for my weird obsession with humanity's fancy new-fangled ways to brutally kill each other being very ingrained in my mind as a means to distract myself from my emotions and how it's become a way to express them despite this especially around my friends and of course leaves me wondering about the morality behind an obsession such as this and whether or not this is healthy at all for anyone least of all someone with a history of serious anger problems and a lot of beef with the world at large considering how much I feel as though I have been brainwashed by my parents, teachers and the myth of americana and if this arms obsession is a product of that and maybe that's why I feel like I'm a bad person sometimes but also I don't feel safe doing that because that would be agreeing with my mother who probably thinks that if I don't hold as many of her beliefs and live as close a life to hers as feasible then she won't go to heaven and how I can't complain about anything because she put me in this world and she can take me out which she always said in jest but knowing my anger issues stem from her I worry she could actually be liable to really do that should she find out about this whole shtick and also very frustrated that if she doesn't do that (not attempting murder being much more likely) I will have the perfect opportunity to confront her about things she said and her mother said and her shitass halfassed 'apology(?)' on her behalf but I cant be too mean grandma died very recently and if I press about stuff mumsy dearest herself said she'll just deny it. just be like 'oh I dont remember saying that so everything is better now because your rage is unfounded because your trauma doesnt exist arent you so relieved?' no you fuckass bitch take your own advice that you raised me on and admit to what you did ffs how else do you expect me to forgive you even slightly. oohooh or she'll pull her favorite move, where she mocks my actual genuine emotions because she thinks I'm doing it just to get her to pity me which DEFINITELY HAS NOT RESULTED IN A GREAT DIFFICULTY IN BEING ABLE TO GAUGE MY EMOTIONAL STATE OR EVEN SO MUCH AS WHAT THE HELL IS GOING THROUGH MY OWN GODDAMN HEAD HALF THE FUCKING TIME, BUT IF THAT'S NOT WHAT CAUSED IT OH GOLLY FUCKING GEE HOW IT VEXES ME SO

"hey why don't you like hanging out with us?"

*we're watching a tv show. an older black lady is in the hospital after exuding very serious symptoms and fainting at a farmers market and who I presume is her daughter (I don't watch this show on my own time so idk) is at her bedside and this character is a med student. the emergency room doctor says something about web md to suggest incompetence and petty fretting over nothing when the show had clear scenes and depictions of the aforementioned symptoms of what is later revealed to be a very serious heart condition. the real world problems poc face when it comes to healthcare are explicitly discussed amongst characters in this episode. the need for poc autonomy surrounding their healthcare is also explicitly stated by the daughter of the older black lady with the heart condition (I'm sorry I don't have names here I genuinely cannot remember them at all because I dont really watch this show, the show in question being 9-1-1 I think)*

'no i dont think it was a race thing tho'

*my brothers and I had been discussing the many ways marvel movies had jumped the shark*

'yeah and im also sick of all that woke crap' (she knows I'm bisexual btw just not about being genderfluid yet)

*grandma hadn't died yet (I believe this was in around october(?)) and had gotten talking about book bans and mentioned The 57 Bus, a book about a real agender highschooler who was burnt alive on a public bus for being queer by a guy who was pressured into it*

'oh but they had gay employees and were really nice to them' (at some point my (great?)grandparents owned a country club)

"idk ig I just like screwing around on my phone"

dad's a tesla driver and would prolly lick elon's boots until they were clean enough to double as mirrors and also made me spend more time than is generally considered useful learning vba and microsoft access (not entirely useless skills tbh but not very helpful because who uses either in the year of our lord that will pay me anything worth a fuck in an Economy™ that is so fucked I don't need to elaborate any more on just how fucked it is rn) oh yeah and as is Freedom-Loving American Tradition he spent more of my childhood at work, sometimes in an entirely different country for said job which is why my parents worry about my bond (or lack thereof) with my dad all the time and yet both refuse to acknowledge that having to work in order to be worth being kept alive is what caused this and can you believe that I made the realization about this part specifically because of the phone guy save button Ness/Ninten's dad in the Mother™ Series™? (on a tangentially related note, official english localized Mother 3 when?)

fr when I'm in that house every bone in my body is telling me I shoulda ran when I was like 10 and never looked back and I know people have had worse than this with their parents but this isn't about them and for that I am sorry but I can't speak for them nor do I wish to downplay my problems

[hotseok]

honestly, i haven't seen anyone accuse mx of this so idk why mbbs are inserting themselves in this issue. anyway, there where some names dropped (fuckass bfree and bobby for example), as well as the projects kpop stans were creating to ruin bts' image like#breakthewings project started by lovely exols. another thing that bothers me is that it IS pretty clear who the bullies are, because, over the past years, multiple celebrities, idols inculded, have admitted to treating the group badly when they were rookies. suju members, especially bastard shindong mentioned yelling at them and mistreating them few times when bts were teens and yet kpop fans are still saying the stories are made up and defending them? there is also many idols confirming that bts were often not given their own rooms at award shows and had to do make up and practice choreographies in the corridors, yet again, people ignore those statements and say it's just 'made up sob stories'. idk for someone who has been an army for quite a while much of this isn't any news, since boys have been talking about their issues, just noone but army listened

BOBBY??? suju members I am not shocked about & I seriously with all my heart and soul need them to disband but Bobby??? wow

[todayisdeadinside]

Lets fucking break this down.

"But why don't we think about it from Simon's perspective?" Why? Why on earth should we take this case of 5 teenage (4 underage) boys being overworked and used for their talent, shot into global fame young, left with mental health and addiction problems, at the hand of this millionaire old man, and consider Simon's perspective? How can you look at a case of 5 boys being abused and think "but what about the abuser? what was HE thinking?"

"Hes an entrepeneur, taking every chance to make the most money" THERE! You admit Simon is a greedy capitalist pig who was looking for ways to make the most money, even if it meant using children with lots of talent to skyrocket his own wallet. How can you say later in the post that Simon "cared about the boys" when he only ever cared about money? He wouldn't let them take proper breaks, they barely SLEPT during the years the band was together, Niall needed a knee surgery he didn't get, Zayn developed an ED just to control SOMETHING about his life, Liam's addiction issues are 100% because of how he was handled in the band. Simon isn't an "entrepeneur" he's a greedy old man who built his pathetic career off using and hurting people. 1D was his best shining example of that module.

The amount of albums and tours those boys put out during those 5 years was NOT normal and no amount of worldwide fame makes it okay. Them becoming famous DOES NOT MAKE IT OKAY. Do you remember being 16, 17, 18? Most grown men can't handle the schedule those children had, and you don't see any of the boys mimicking their band schedule in their solo careers. Once they went solo, they took longer to write songs that actually MEANT something to them, to plan tours at their own pace with enough breaks to be rested and ready for their next project.

Many artists are worldwide famous, many even more famous than 1D. None of them had the schedule 1D had. Being overworked as teenagers was NOT excused by the fame they achieved. They could have reached that level of fame with a better schedule and better care. I firmly believe they would have been MORE famous and lasted longer as a band if they HADN'T been so pump-and-dumped by Syco. Also, in case you forgot, 1D LOST X-Factor. They didn't even win Simon's fuckass show. They became famous ANYWAY, because people LIKED them. Without Simon, Syco, or X-Factor, sure, things would be *different*, but they'd almost certainly be *better.* Those boys, now men, would be happier. Liam might be alive.

There's a laundry list of people to blame for Liam's death, the industry as a whole and the capitalist system among them. Liam was a 31 year old talented man with a whole life ahead of him. He had so much love to give the world. Just because he metaphorically pulled the trigger doesn't erase the people who metaphorically loaded that gun over the years and pushed him to bring it to his head. There are non-famous examples of cases like this, where someone is pushed to suicide by someone else. Just because they killed themself doesn't erase the person who caused it. And no, Simon didn't solely cause Liam's death, but him and his company, and how he handled 1D, played a MAJOR part in Liam's addiction and his untimely death. To ignore that is to be willfully ignorant, and to suck the industry's dick, to be straight with you.

"Simon loved those lads when they weren't in working relationships." No he didn't. I don't care if he cried at Liam's funeral. I don't care if HE thinks he loved them. What he did to One Direction is not how you show love. Overworking and using teenagers for everything they can give for more millions is NOT love. If the CEO of your company made you work the way those boys worked, nonstop, and you developed lasting problems for the rest of your life, only to die at 31, would you want people saying "but their CEO loved them"?

Terrible post OP, absolutely garbage take. YOU need to think logically. Stop trying to play devil's advocate for a rich man who saw and took the quickest chance to use 5 babies.

It’s been a month so I’d like to talk about something. Simon Cowell gets so much hate since the hiatus of one direction and so so much allegations as well, in which I totally can see where they’re coming from.

But why do directioners never really thought about the entire thing from Simon’s perspective?

He’s an entrepreneur, and an entrepreneur is taking every single chance to make the most money off of the opportunity. One direction was his chance. I may be lame and cheeky on this, but if I was Simon I would do the same thing as he did to the lads such as making them to create as much songs as possible, work overtime etc.

“Simon is a businessman, not a charity.”

If Simon didn’t push the 5 young lads to their limits, yes they may be still together, or Liam may still be alive now. But would they ever be THIS big? No. Absolutely not, not even a chance, not even close.

Without Simon, one direction wouldn’t even have THIS fan base in 5 years. Wouldn’t have 5 studio albums out, wouldn’t have 3 world tours sold out within minutes.

Indeed nicole was the actual mother who gave birth to 1D, but without Simon they would’ve been NO WHERE ON THE TOP of the music history.

I’m not saying that I agree with Simon’s actions, but I’m saying that there’s NO ONE. Absolutely no one left to blame for Liam’s death BUT Liam Payne himself.

Also without a doubt, Simon absolutely loved the 5 young lads when they’re not in working relationships.

PLEASE. think LOGICALLY, not GENEROUSLY.

-thrucigarette.

[tg-headcanons]

what are your opinions on the quinx as characters?

I LOVE THE QUINX! I think that they started off as such amazing characters but, like everything else in this fuckass show, got their stories cut short to an unsatisfying conclusion. Had I written their stories, I would have done some things different, but in all there’s so much to go on with them. Specifically, that each of them represent a way that the CCG indoctrinates new members

First there’s Urie, representing those taken in after a family member in the CCG is killed in a ghoul related trauma. He is one of many people who have a sort of ghoul killing lineage. His father fought, then died, then he was taken in my people who echoed back to him that it was ghouls and their evil that killed him to keep him under their thumb, and it worked. Urie is shut off, simultaneously craving and rejecting belonging. He’s been raised in the idea that climbing ranks and killing ghouls is the best thing, that’s the best way to do good, it’s the best way to be good. I love this basis, and if I could change his story, I would have had it focus more of the other quinx bringing him out of his shell sooner

Then there’s Saiko, representing those coerced by teachers and parents to take dangerous positions they don’t want. The CCG can afford to incentivize parents to push jobs onto their children and it gets them more exploitable employees. Saiko never had a choice, she was made into a quinx under pressure and then trapped in her job. She never wanted to be there, but by the time she could stand up for herself it was too late. If I could change her story, I would have her work against the CCG, sabotaging them in any act of revenge she can reach and trying to dismantle their schools. She would have made an amazing revolutionary

Next there’s Ginshi, It should come as no surprise that I LOVE HIM. Ginshi represents those orphaned and in poverty who can’t afford to give up the CCG’s offers. First he lost his mother, then his father, then his sister got irreversibly ill. He was just a child, and he didn’t know what to do, so along came these adults who tell him that if he goes to their school under their custody and takes their job, they’ll take care of it. He didn’t know what he was getting into, only that this is the only help he has and there’s no one left in his life that isn’t telling him to do it. He became a quinx because he needed the money, healthcare, and housing, but unintentionally signed up to commit horrifying murders. He even understood it in the end, he was so close to getting that he was horribly wronged, but was killed off. If I could change his story, I’d have him live, and live to realize how the CCG had exploited and lied to him. Ginshi would be the first to reach out to ghouls, because maybe they have answers as to why the doves would do this, and he would learn just how awful the organization is. He of all people deserves to destroy that place

Finally, Mutsuki, the one done dirtiest of them all. He represents those exploited for social issues and mental illnesses that leave them vulnerable. He had a horrific origin, severe trauma and mental illness, and was a trans kid with no support. Combine all these things and you get a boy so vulnerable that he can pretty much be shaped into whatever they want under the guise of help, and have his wishes overriden with the argument that he’s insane if he ever protests. They never offered him any psychiatric care, never offered him decent transitioning care, only a job that they say will make people love him if he follows all their orders. They did the same to Juuzou, so it’s not like this is anything new. After that there’s the whole shitshow of racism and transphobia that befalls him, so this poor dude has a lot I’d do differently. For starters, NOT FUCKING THAT. Secondly, I’d have him reach out to the other quinx with his worries and what’s happened to him, and for the first time receive real support and assurance that what happened to him wasn’t okay. He isn’t crazy, it was really as bad as he remembers it, and it never should have happened. It should be changed so it can never happen again

In all, I love the quinx, but I wish they had very different endings. They deserve to be a family who are alive, together, and given closure

[thepoisonroom]

okay in reddie whos the an and whos the sb?

okay i had no idea this was even up for debate but i have opinions and here they are:

let’s say we’re working directly off of the definitions given in the original niche post, so:

a sweaterboy “is stable [and] settled. the sweaterboy lives within a familiar pattern, and is, in all likelihood, highly competent at what they do. but is the sweaterboy happy? fuck no, dude! [...] the sweaterboy thinks that this is what relationships — of any kind — should look like: giving and giving and giving, and never actually asking for what they want. Because that would be selfish. the sweaterboy would never want to burden anyone; the sweaterboy, deep down, fears very much that they are a burden”

an absolute nightmare “is someone who has entirely rejected the task of trying to conform to societal norms. they know they don’t fit in. they know they’re not like everybody else. and while they are outwardly bold and defiant and confident, they’re often very lonely. they internalize their issues; they may be mistaken for aloof and uncaring when, in fact, they have big feelings”

let’s discuss the book evidence. we have:

eddie “needed to be protected from his own dim intimations of possible bravery” kaspbrak. lives under his mom’s thumb for years and years because he’s been taught to fear what will happen if he steps out of line even a little! his internal fear of being different, which i would argue is heavily mapped to his sexuality, is externalized in his fear of disease and especially in his fear of sexually-transmitted infection. he tries being a regular straight dude with a wife and a nine to five that he excels at but he’s deeply unhappy with it! he’s replicating what he knows as normalcy (i.e. maladaptive relationship patterns from his childhood) in a desperate attempt to conform which is some CLASSIC sweaterboy bullshit. eddie isn’t your conventional sweaterboy because his definition of what the aspirational norm looks like is so deeply colored by his hypochondria, so as readers we still register him as abnormal, but in his own way he’s trying to live the lifestyle that was prescribed for him that he associates with his mother (fearful, straight, cautious). 

i think the thing that hammers this home the most for me is book Eddie’s relationship with surveillance and being watched. the book repeatedly makes the point that eddie’s personality and self-image are directly contingent on being watched, and who’s doing it. the text makes the argument that eddie when he’s being watched by his friends, or when he’s alone, is fundamentally different from eddie being watched by people who enact violent mechanisms of social control (e.g. bullies who beat him up for not conforming, or his mother who inflicts medicalized violence on him whenever he steps out of line). we get a pretty unambiguous statement of this in the flashback where eddie remembers his gym teacher having an argument with his mother:

“i have the results of eddie’s last physical on file […] it says that eddie is a little small for his age, but otherwise he’s absolutely normal […] he loves to play games, and he runs quite fast […] when there’s nobody around to remind him of how delicate he is”

basically, eddie lives with this constant awareness of how authority figures in his life want him to be, and he conforms when they’re watching him, for the most part. this is how he can be totally capable of the same physical activities as other children and still buy into his mother’s insistence that he’s delicate and constantly ill; he has internalized that surveillance until it’s unconscious/second nature to replicate the behavior that’s expected of him. we also see this focus on surveillance when eddie talks about how he loves bill because he never calls him homophobic slurs, the implication being that other boys their age do. with his friends, eddie can let go of that internal voyeur that watches and polices his actions to make sure that he’s not behaving in a way that might invite unwanted negative attention. you actually see little flashes of this in the scene where ben meets eddie and bill and eddie has a bloody nose from talking back to some bullies! eddie by himself or with his friends is a brave little motherfucker in a world that’s determined to make him afraid (of himself, of the consequences of abnormality, of his sexuality)! i love him so much! but anyway!

basically, eddie spends his entire childhood and most of his adult life trying to bend himself into a shape that’s as small and unassuming and inoffensive as possible. he associates any deviation from the norm with sickness and lives in fear of what it would mean to be different in any way. stephen king literally doesn’t deserve rights but his scene of eddie cataloguing and packing the contents of his medicine cabinet after mike calls him? that’s a goddamned fucking portrait of the iron fist with which many deeply closeted gays try to control their lives. i’m not a hypochondriac but the worst years for my ocd happened when i was trying my hardest to avoid coming out to myself. the mechanism of control varies, but it all comes down to a desperate conviction that something unspeakably terrible will happen if you don’t enact all these horribly specific rituals to protect yourself. eddie’s mechanisms are pills and his inhaler and his marriage and i’m literally going to stop bleeding myself dry writing this oh my god i projected a little too hard there sorry.

anyway: richie “sometimes enchanting, often exhausting charm” tozier. gets beat up constantly because he canNOT stop himself from saying every fuckass thing that comes to his head! he’s whipsmart and observant as fuck and can’t keep it to himself and that gets him singled out by the bullies! i don’t have the exact quote but roll the clip of the part where it talks about richie’s face begging to be bent into new and interesting shapes by bullies ANYWAY. richie is someone who knows he doesn’t fit in and has given up on the task of pretending to! sometimes he’s charming and funny! sometimes he’s exhausting and weird as shit! but that’s absolute nightmarism babey!

the thing that really gets me about richie is that he’s subject to exactly the same normative surveillance as eddie and he canNOT keep himself from telling his audience to fuck off! we see flashes of this when richie hesitates before touching bill for fear that someone might see them and subject them to homophobic harassment. but he touches him anyway! yeah he looks surreptitiously but he touches him anyway! like richie is guided by feelings of deep love and devotion to his friends and he can’t help but express that and wow i’m getting emotional about richie too anyway!

richie as an adult is someone who is weird as shit for attention, but it’s a performance that deflects from his issues being emotionally vulnerable, which is classic AN. the movie got this so right with the part where richie admits he threw up after mike called him, and then tells the other losers he’s glad that they’re there together. like, everyone is shocked because this is a moment of deep vulnerability and sincerity from someone who’s performatively larger than life in order to keep people at a distance. the 2017 movie gives us this with richie deflecting the conversation about their fears by asking stan if the woman from the painting was hot, and again when he says that his biggest fear is clowns, a claim that is NOT borne out by what he sees inside niebolt. richie is, in short, someone who’s comfortable with attention but NOT with scrutiny; he isn’t ready to be seen with all of his vulnerabilities on display, so he puts on a show for people to look at instead. that’s the core of absolute nightmarism. it’s a committed performance of weirdness that’s intended to telegraph invulnerability, but a tightly controlled one that’s meant to ensure that people only look where you want them to. it’s a magic act that shows you something shiny so you won’t glance at where the soft spots are hidden. eddie wants you to look away because there’s nothing to see here, richie wants you to look but only at what he shows you.

i think the thing that cements it for me is the book content about richie’s nicknames for eddie. richie is SUPER demonstrative with eddie and is constantly calling him goofy nicknames and telling him he’s cute. but we get that great quote about how eddie hated being called eds, but sort of liked it too, because it was like a secret identity. that’s the core of the dynamic, imo. the absolute nightmare helps draw the sweaterboy out of their devotion to normalcy and emboldens them to be the version of themselves that they are without the outside pressures of authority and heteronormativity and whatever. the dynamic is book eddie wanting to be the person he is with his friends, the eds of it all, and it’s also book eddie fighting off a panic attack because he has to be brave when the losers need him, and it’s also movie eddie directly attacking pennywise because he’s been reminded of his own “dim intimations of possible bravery” like! i could go on but this is so fucking long anyway yes i think eddie is the SB and richie is the AN now roll the clip of the part where richie asks eddie if he knows what fucking is and eddie is like OF COURSE I DO and the text is like “he hoped he wasn’t blushing” like that’s the dynamic babe

[ohhicas]

I've only been into comics for a few years, but I've read enough of the old Flash stuff where I adore the classic incarnations of the Rogues. Honestly curious here: what's it like to be a fan of James Jesse back when he was retgonned around 10 years ago and see him brought back but now all mwahaha crazy evil? I'm way more used to Axel (and all that off-panel character development in Nu52, thanks DC) but even I find this kinda weird. Was James ever crazy evil in any arc?

^- me 90% of the time someone says James is coming back to recent media & it’s not a direct continuation of the comics prior to 2004

[ Warning: this is gonna get long and be full of a lot of assumptions. I can never form solid statements and things will get jumbled, because I suck at presenting things ]

[ this is my can of worms hill and you opened it so I’m dYING HERE ]

I mean, back in the earliest ages, no Rogue had a real personality to speak of? They were just “1960s Bad Guy in a different outfit” at the very start, with quirks! Like James having a thing for toys and nuclear powered flying tricycles. It wasn’t until that era ended that they started getting real distinct and into what a lot of ‘classic’ James fans loved and appreciated? 

(I think at least, I’m just One Person here pretending like I even understand HALF of what the ‘classic’ fandom enjoyed. I’m wildly speculating just going off what fanworks I’ve seen produced.)

(I don’t have all my scans anymore but I’ll toss in scans when I have them)

But that’s when we started getting things like James actually having specified friendships with certain people

or clear distaste towards others, and when you could tell he was more of a wild card than the others. Or when he decided to fuck off and hang out in Hollywood with Blue Devil for a bit, even siding with Kid Devil to deck out Captain Boomerang. 

Or when he decided to fuck off to Gotham, to mess with Catwoman by pretending he didn’t know who she was, but absolutely knew who she was because of how she walked and carried herself, but James being James was like “mmmmm long con, nope”

hey lil Cold, gimme all ur guns and don’t question why I’m in drag xoxo

Even then, he wasn’t shown to be vicious yet! He’d hopped around various places, was still considered A Rogue, A Criminal, and as far as any comic reader could tell by trying to count up how many civilians may have been crossfired at, he had no On Purpose deaths racked? Like, the only thing you could really argue was he may have made someone drive their car off a cliff once, but I’m like 98% sure they’re fine. He’s not a murderer, he’s just here for a laugh and a long-con for funsies because he know he can get away with it!

AND THEN WE GET A LITTLE OLDER, LITTLE DARKER

[ I’M PUTTING A CUT HERE CAUSE AFTER I THREW IT INTO DRAFTS, I REALIZED I GOT REALLY LONG, I’M SORRY IF MY LAYOUT SUCKS ASS FOR THIS. ]

little more 90s Hair. Little more 90s stereotypical “But what if EVERYONE WENT TO HELL” demon plots against Satanic Hockey Hair Neron. And James? still wasn’t evil? He was a little dismissive when everyone ELSE died sure but he still in the end turned around like “nghgng I’m THE ONLY ONE”, purposely got his ass down there, regretted it, and then beat Neron at his own game to save the entire fucking world. Because! He could! And he did it so well. STILL NOT EVIL, even when he had a chance right then and there to take over everything alongside Neron should he so desire. Like, two words, maybe some under the table BJs depending on how you feel about that pairing (I don’t), and bam. He would’ve bested nearly any other villain in the DCU save like, Satan himself. Or i guess one of those world destroyers. But we’ll get back around to those BOY HOWDY WE WILL GET AROUND TO THOSE. 

So James! Saves! The world! Sorta! Later they fight Neron again and his kid he somehow had somewhere down the road (it sounds like I’m complaining, i’m not, I love Billy and Mindy both I just wish they showed up like… ever again?) and he sTILL SAVES EVERYONE. 

Piper helps by their 90s ponytails combined. 

Somewhere around here, because dates and timing aren’t my strong suit, he also goes and messes with Bart for a bit. It’s pretty much a Spy Vs Spy episode, but with less bloodshed. 

ANYWAY IT’S AFTER THIS POINT THAT THINGS GET… where I think the majority of “James is a Low Rate Joker” comes from? 

For some unknown goddamn reason, in between issues (James wasn’t a Super Frequent Rogue? He’d show up, sure, but in the huge run of the series he’d just kind of vanish for 20 issues at a time and you’d go “welp, guess he’s still alive”) James went super-cop? like, the FBI? For some reason? Hired James “I am a probably still wanted felon, a man who has escaped jail numerous times, probably never served a full sentence, known Trickster and liar” Jesse. to the FBI. And for so many issues it’s like he legit just. Did this. He threatens to shoot Piper who he was up until this very moment, considerably very close friends with (as far as comics would show Rogue/Rogue friendships), unwilling to help his friend clearly framed for murder of his parents and losing his mind by the day. Despite James talking Hart down a little on the whole ‘THE MAYOR IS ROSCOE ADN NOBODY BELIEVES MEEEEEEEE” thing. 

Also he steals Digger’s dead ass corpse? 

FBI James is a fucking enigma. Here he is standing up for Gay Rights even though Piper is like “mm maybe I should forgive my abuser??”

BUT. AFTER THIS? WE GET COUNTDOWN WHICH IS JUST. Countdown is. IT’s a problem. James’s personality is IMMEDIATELY HORRIBLY u-turned into “well we need SOMEONE to be the Bad Guy to Piper’s Good!” DESPITE. ALL THESE YEARS OF COMICS.This is the shit you’ll see people who don’t know better or just want a reason to hate the Trickster (despite being 100% okay for them to just say he’s annoying/they don’t like his tights/acrobats are stupid) reference. James is, suddenly, very abruptly, a homophobe. Like an “ew don’t touch me” level homophobe because I’m pretty sure DC snorts cocaine and threw a dart at a board for “how could they make these two fight” and landed on GAY RIGHTS IS TRENDING. 

BUTSTILL IN THE FUCKING END OF ALL OF THIS?After so many issues of James being a complete fuckass prick? 

springboards himself from his current job of being railroad face putty to catching bullets to make sure Piper wasn’t gonna die. Without knowing the proceedings of this entire plotline, James out of nowhere after so much gaybashing, still finds it in him to leap into the path of multiple bullets and save Piper. Because, yknow, he’s evil!

Later it’s shown he’s been working to take everyone down (y’know, like when he was in the FBI) and left Piper specific helpful notes to do it himself. Because Evil Bad Guy! Helping his gone-good friend! Take down bad guys! 

DC I STILL HAVE SO MANY GODDMAN QUESTOINgsd

But yeah that’s. That’s where we last saw James. in 2007, dead, after saving Piper when he could have easily pulled a Joker and ripped HIM down to take hte bullets and etcetc, y’know. Something a Very Bad Person would’ve done, like the characterization we’ve seen now. 

His ghost (easily argued as Piper’s own mental construction of James sassing him) sasses Hartley to even, in his mental state, saw off James’s hand so Piper doesn’t have to lug his weight around and has a fighting chance at living. And in the end, when Piper’s fighting the thing that can destroy the fucking world, it’s shown only Piper was the one who could save them? Because his flute, and his musical ability, and [enter DC comic science here]. You could argue this was James, once again, somehow knowing the long-con at play here, getting screwed over at EVERY turn, and sacrificing himself so they ‘good’ team had a fighting chance.You could also argue this is me losing my mind trying to make sense of the things they made James do. (my running argument is he was purposely a prick to push Piper away, so he could keep him safe) 

Also Piper plays James a Swan Song of Queen as the final boss explodes and he’s fully prepared to die. So like. There’s that. 

AND THATS BASICALLY THE COMICS? The main, ‘canon timeline’ comics. I’m missing a LOT of little things here and there, but I’m not missing anything like body counts, or murder attempts, beyond the old Silver Age “Bad guy of the week” things like trying to make Flash’s head explode, or you know. Other “nobody really has a personality, we just have quirks”. 

MY NUMBER ONE GUESS TO WHERE THIS NEW PERSONALITY TREND COMES FROM?

Mark Hamil|’s OG run as him in the old live action show. That characterization was fun, for the time, and I even enjoyed it cause it was just that off the wall and you could tell it was what they used to decide he should be the Joker for the BATS Joker. Consider it a prototype (combined with all the previous comic jokers but that’s not for this long ass post) 

And if it’d stayed there, that’d be it! That’s it! But then JLU came along, and they referenced the old show for their version of James with a sprinkling of early-era comics, and a lot of people loved and watched that show. That was their version of the Trickster, because it was their first meeting with him! And I can’t fault that! But that guy was clearly off his rocker and I’m sure if the JLU allowed a higher rating, it would’ve been even closer to the old TV show. 

And both of THOSE were heavily, heavily referenced for the CW version, which as I’m at this point now means I need to slap my usual anti-CW tag onto things. I hate the CW James. There is so little comic in him it’s almost disgusting, and they ramped up so much of the Joker side of JLU & OGTV he might as well just be the Joker. It’s not a good representation of him at all. I have, also, only seen his first appearance episode, so maybe I’m wrong? But when you fuck up hard on the first run, why would I return for round 2? 

So with ALL THIS– 

REBOOT TIME. Whatever the newnew remake is calling itself. 

At first! With how James was! In the first panel flash of him clearly behind the scenes tugging so many wires and lines, watching everything with a bucket of popcorn while pulling others to his side, sitting pretty in an old museum? warehouse? highlighted in purples and vintage toys, I was like “holy shit this it. This is My Boy, back from the goddamn limbo-dead. It’s him.” But then“taking over the city entirely” to do? What? Turn it into the world’s biggest Trickster themepark? Make everyone wear striped leggings and combat boots? Martial Law of murder if you don’t carry rubber chickens? This is already veering from anything major James has ever done. As it stands I can’t see the gag here. Its’ weirdly dark and edgy, and way too close to something we saw the 90s TV show Trickster do, in the episode where he basically took over the place. The previews show him being what I’m assuming a Judge, Jury, & Executioner joke– and unless this spins into a Clopin song and dance number and his little hand puppet crops up to slam the button on the guillotine, I’m not having it, DC. 

They’re trying to tie him back into the CW, despite the writer saying he really enjoyed the Neron-era things with James (if I’m remembering the interview correctly). And it’s also why you may see me constantly saying “Well I sure as fuck hope Neron shows up” at anything new that’s released, to explain away all of… this.

This isn’t him. If they wanted a murderous Trickster, they should’ve just used Axel. The kid, canonly, tied explosives to stray dogs and homeless people. AXEL is the not-good Trickster, the murderous Trickster, the one you aren’t suppose to feel sorry for beyond being in way over his head due to his young age. 

i think I somehow didn’t answer your question

TL;DR

it sucks? it’s also great because there’s a .5% chance that maybe they’ll do it right and won’t reference the fucking 90s noncomic media. But then they do. And all I can do is laugh and shrug like ‘welp I expected nothing’. But when they get it RIGHT it’s like christmas came early.

[firelord-frowny]

i’m bored and annoyed so imma rant about how fucking dumb my job is 

my profession, for someone with my credentials, pays an average of 50 dollars per hour. you know how much this damn place is paying me? 27.50.

we ARE NOT allowed to work more than 15 hours per week. And yet...

there is literally no agreement in place dictating how many hours we ARE expected to work each week. Nor is there an agreement on what days we are supposed to work on. 

there is no protocol in place for what steps we need to take if we miss a day. there is literally NOTHING in writing about who we’re supposed to inform that we’ll be absent, or how/when we can make up for the absence. but like. given that we don’t have schedules ANYWAY, i guess that’s a fucking non-issue.

time cards are due in the MIDDLE of the week. meaning that on Wednesday, we have to fucking guess how many more hours/days we’ll be at work for the rest of the week. 

if i say i plan to be there on thursday but wind up not being able to show up after all, i still wind up getting paid for thursday since they already submitted the time sheet. so on my NEXT paycheck, they fucking subtract the amount. but okay, even though that’s annoying as fuck, i can see how that’s fair. AND YET...

if i come in an EXTRA day after time sheets have already been submitted, they won’t add that time to my NEXT paycheck. i would essentially just be working for fucking free. so for some fuckass reason, they’re perfectly capable of TAKING money, but can’t be bothered to add it. 

they never had me even sign a contract agreeing to work there lmfao. 

[sophygurl]

WisCon 42 panel MCU’s Black Superheroes

The full title of this panel was Show Me My Respect: A Critical Look At The MCU’s Black Superheroes

The panel description:

Has the MCU done its black characters justice over the last 10 years? Did Disney allow Ryan Coogler to give Black Panther the respect and nuance it deserves? Did the Russo Brothers f*ck up everything in Avengers: Infinity War that the black and NBPOC writers and directors established in building complex characters and storylines? Let's explore this decade-long journey into Phase IV to see how the MCU has and will continue to treat us.

The moderator was Jennifer Cross, with panelists Aunterria Bollinger and K. Tempest Bradford.

Reminder that these panel notes are only my own recollections and the things I managed to write down - my notes are incomplete and likely faulty in places. Corrections and additions are always welcome. Especially please do correct me if I get names or pronouns wrong!

Also I name panelists as that’s publicly available information but not audience members unless requested by that person to have their named added.

[I came into the panel a little bit late, so missed intros and probably some other stuff.]

Tempest was talking about the black best friend trope and that DCTV does this a lot. Rhodey is very underused, and Civil War turned him into the disabled black best friend. 

Jennifer said Don Cheadle deserves better! Iron Man 2 gave complexity to Rhodey and Tony’s relationship and Civil War messed a lot of that up. It also made Rhodey disabled in a super questionable way [I missed some of this statement]. It was a literal cheap shot and felt like Joss Whedon saw him as an expendable character to use to elevate white man pain. Also the fact that Rhodey just automatically sides with Tony - what happened to the tension between them and Rhodey holding Tony accountable for his actions?

Jennifer made an aside to let the audience know that the panelists were going to be using a lot of code switching and AAVE references. She then went on to say “Fuck Infinity War - Russo brothers, take your white man pain to Ralph Lauren and buy some more polo shirts.” (lol)

Jennifer brought up that two black American men go to Wakanda for the first time and said nothing about it. Also they made Wakanda look “dank as shit.” 

Tempest said the amount of Cumberbatch she had to stare at in Infinity War was too much - she skipped a whole movie to avoid him! (me too) One problem with IW was that there were just too many people in it, so they couldn’t properly focus on anyone. 

Tempest added - why didn’t they just ask Shuri to fix things from the start? She was finally going to fix it, but she got interrupted by more man pain! Jennifer added that she loved the “you tried” moment with Shuri. 

Aunterria talked about IW’s short shifting of Wakanda as if they were saying “well we gave you a whole movie - what else do you want?” But also how much worse it might have been if that had been the first introduction to Wakanda instead of coming out after Black Panther. 

Jennifer brought up Winter Soldier and how Sam got to have a whole back story about his PTSD. In IW, we see him helping other people with their trauma but they never address how events are affecting him. She talked about how PTSD varies from person to person, and about how it can affect black people differently, especially.

Tempest brought up the gaybaiting of the series. Jennifer adds that she hates shipping, but she loves Sam and Bucky. 

Tempest said that Sam has more back story than Rhodey in terms of story that isn’t tied to a main white character. She will also never forgive Tony for shooting him in the face in Civil War. Marvel tries with regards to race, but their attempts are inadequate. 

She went on to talk about the character of M’Baku in Black Panther. She has a friend who was initially very upset about the inclusion of this character because in the comics the portrayal is very racist. Then he saw the movie and saw how great the character was. This is what happens when you give black people agency. Ryan Coogler had a lot of freedom in how he made BP.

Tempest added that white directors may try, but when trying to fix race in one area, they often make it racist in a whole other way. She brought up the Mandarin, for example. Why don’t you just ask an Asian person?

Jennifer said she wanted the panel to primarily focus on black people. The MCU fucks up all people of color, but the panel is specifically about black characters. 

She added that she loved watching Rhodey kick Tony’s ass. When he said “you don’t deserve to wear this suit” - it was a calling out of his privilege. She also found it suspect that Rhodey didn’t notice Tony’s PTSD in Iron Man 3. He’s a veteran and a general and would be trained to look for those signs. She said “we’re 10% of the population in LA - find one of us and pay us to fix this stuff.” Especially important to find a black veteran officer to inform Rhodey and Sam’s characters. She no longer trusts white people to write black people. 

Jennifer moved on to Valkyrie. She said she does love Thor because Chris Hemsworth. Also Taiki Watiti did surprisingly well. She loves Tessa Thompson. 

Aunterria talked about her love for Danai Gurira as both Michonne in The Walking Dead and Okoye in the MCU. However, she still falls under the trope of the exceptional black woman giving it all up for a man. 

Tempest countered that saying that Okoye fights for Wakanda over a man. She and T’Challa fight alongside one another and it’s clear that she would do the same for Shuri if she was queen. BP is not just about awesome black men, but black women too. There isn’t enough complexity in the other black characters in the MCU with the exceptions of Heimdall and Valkyrie. Asgard also had random Asian and black characters walking around that are never addressed or explained.

Jennifer loved Valkyrie drunkenly stepping off the ramp. Also the quietness of Heimdall’s character even when had more to do than just standing there. She talked about being a big Norse Scandanavian folklore nerd and said Asgard looks the way it’s supposed to look - it was actually diverse as shit. It took a man of color to finally make it look almost accurate representation-wise. She references the show The Almighty Johnsons as a show about Norse gods living in New Zealand. 

Jennifer wonders if it’s going to take only poc behind the scenes to give us proper treatment. Way down in her soul is an optimist that “no amount of beating with Lucille can shut up” that wants to know if it can happen any other way. 

Aunterria said she’s not optimistic about this. She can’t think of a poc character written by a white person that’s done anything meaningful or purposeful or accurate. 

There is much collective groaning about Iron Fist.

Aunterria talked about making Luke Cage bulletproof but not talking about police violence. Giving black characters powers without engaging in the social issues around them. 

Jennifer said she is mixed about Luke Cage. It’s the embodiment of respectability politics. But there is an effort to show Harlem and the gentrification of it. There’s this idea that poc don’t have any room to make mistakes. BP did so well that Kevin Feige is begging Coogler to come back. 

Jennifer said that she loves the women in LC - especially Misty. There are lots of women who are all different people, all unapologetically black but in different ways. She’s watching it for the women. Praises Alfre Woodard. 

Tempest uses headcanons to make movies better.

Jennifer addressed how Tessa Thompson was the one out of the women in the MCU cast to ask Kevin Feige about them wanting their own movie. Why did the black woman have to be the one to ask for what all these white women have been wanting? Why couldn’t ScarJo take her white appropriating ass up there and ask about it?

Tempest talked about the TV part of the MCU technically being in the same universe. TV shows have to include the big events of the movies but not the other way around. She said she stopped watching Shield when Daisy’s transformation killed the black male character (Trip) for one episode of white pain. Jennifer also stopped watching it in season one.

Aunterria is still watching Shield. She wondered if Trip had been killed because of the possibility of his entering into an interracial relationship. She said there is a new black male character (Mack), but his arc is all about suffering. Last season had a storyline about aliens enslaving white people, which was interesting. But the people of color come to save the white people. Jennifer interjects “Killmonger wasn’t wrong...”

Tempest adds “Joss is the most fuckassed fuckass to ever fuckass.” Jennifer asks what about Stephen Moffat? Tempest said - he’s second.

Aunterria said Shield did make the black man the team leader at the end of this season. Jennifer said - so he has to suffer for his reward now and his reward is to parent a group of white people? That’s even more fucked up!

Tempest said that BP gave her hope. Jennifer said - see, she’s not the only one with optimism. Tempest said that Coogler has some power right now - maybe he can bring in some friends and fix some more stuff.

Aunterria said that being a black writer right now is also hard because there is so much to fix. There is so much shit to work on before you can even focus on your craft - so it’s more work for them.

Tempest said her hopes are with the movies over the TV shows.

Jennifer said - “especially fuck babyvampJessica” (Karen from Daredevil). It’s like the paler you are, the more people will die for you. 

Tempest said - as far as cleaning up, BP didn’t have to do that work because they were starting from scratch. There must be other characters that can be brought into the MCU movies that can be written by black writers.

Aunterria said those do exist, but the funding isn’t there. Tempest - but Gods of Egypt somehow got funding!

An audience member asked about Heimdall and if he would come back. Jennifer said that Idris Elba has said no on that. 

Tempest talked about actors being semi-responsible to the narrative of their characters. RDJ even saying - maybe it’s time for me to go? Jennifer added - and then they throw more millions at him and I can’t be mad about that. Tempest said that we know all those people who were turned to dust are coming back. It was a bold decision to kill some of them - but we need to sunset one story in order to have a sunrise on another. Also - “fuck Thanos.” 

Tempest said that something that ruins a narrative almost as much as white supremacy is the irresponsible choices of actors going on and on - except for all of the cast of BP - they can stay as long as they want.

Jennifer said that with Disney owning Marvel, Deadpool is now officially a Disney Princess (lol).

Tempest said she sat through all of Wolverine Origins just to see Hugh Jackman naked and she is done with Deadpool now.

An audience member asked about the character Cottonmouth on LC. Jennifer talked about him as a complex character bridging socio-economic status’s. She added that if you put trauma in a black character’s history, you need to do it in a way that is not just for show. She said the opposite of the example would be Zoe Walsh.

A member of the audience asked about Lash’s purpose on Shield. Aunterria said he filled in May’s backstory and explains things to us about her that we weren’t getting just from her side. But he was mostly there for gratuitous pain and suffering of a black man and Asian woman. 

Jennifer said the MCU is allergic to black love. “Tweet that.” She wants to see a black male character saving a black female character - not just everyone else.

An audience member asked about Miles Morales. Jennifer said - we’ve had four Peter Parkers in fifteen years! Tempest said Tom Holland is at least finally a good one. Kevin Feige has said there is space for Miles, but she wonders who is going to write him? 

Jennifer closed the panel with a firm statement for the white members of the audience, especially. She said - you will take everything good from our culture and appropriate it, but not our pain. You’ve taken our stuff for fun value and for show, but you don’t address our pain. 

This panel was also livetweeted pretty extensively with #blackmcu if you want more/other perspectives from it. 

[For context, I’m white.]

[jamfingers]

I’m so tickled

Lmao damn. When I got off work and turned my phone back on, I saw a tons of notes over this post, which is interesting and unexpected bc this side blog is really just for me to fan over stuff I like and not even completely about K-Pop/BTS specifically. The funniest part was that like half the reblogs w/ responses were just people proving my point and showing their asses, bc I'll bet my life savings they didn’t see this post, this post, this post, or even shitpost 1 and shitpost 2 I made when I was tipsy from celebrating BTS’s win - all before I even made the post that apparently triggered so many. Not to mention the fact that if you simply search my blog tags, BTS is my #2 most used tag, which doesn’t happen overnight for a blog almost a year old so... I do realize most of the neg overreactions coming at me was from younger ppl misunderstanding or altogether missing my point. I can admit that particular post wasn’t well worded, but since I have neither the time, care, nor dedication to chase down every splintered thread, I’ll do my best to be nice in this general response. Can’t say I’ll succeed as I’m tired and mildly irritated but leggo.

To clarify what seems to be the biggest misunderstanding: I was in no way invalidating the work that went into winning the award/fighting off the antis. We did earn it, the award is BTS’s/ours. They win an award from a major music chart with no direct promotion in the host country all whilst coming from a small company? No fucking shit, Sherlock - it goes w/o saying, hence why I didn’t on the bitch baby magnet post, which was one out of a string of a dozen preceding it that had already stated as much.

Second point, and unpopular opinion alert, K-Pop did win too bc the guys’ win was a landmark in music history for their genre, just like PSY’s was in ‘13. Because doesn’t matter if other fandoms have unclaimed us, supported us or dismissed us, or what they said about the award, we’re still what unexposed Americans are currently seeing when they search BTS and K-Pop. Salty fuckass stans can’t change the fact that BTS are categorized as K-Pop and earned milestones for the genre. Along with opening more doors for East Asian and Asian-American, etc. talents, BTS and ARMY are now, for the time being, representative of the entire K-Pop genre in mainstream American media, esp for ppl who didn’t know what K-Pop was outside of “Gangnam Style”. That means ARMYs are the first wave of exposure to passionate K-Pop fans for many ppl who are now interested and how we act towards other K-Pop/Western fandoms/faves in social media will reflect on the whole genre, but especially so on the boys since to many they’re the current face of the genre. Not a terribly hard concept to grasp. Most ppl seemed to get it and agree, but the ones who didn’t were too busy bitching about how shitty other fandoms were to realize I was talking about more representation in mainstream American media being good for the artists. You’re crying to the wrong person.

Thus my third point, that winning gracefully in the face others’ hate/racism/complaints (real or not) instead of having a conniption at every dissent/unpop opinion or gloating obnoxiously about the award, is a win for us and the boys, hence my “stay humble“. Kill them with kindness basically. If the spotlight is bigger and brighter, even just one person acting a fool is going to be duly noted. The post wasn’t even made with the thought in mind that there would be a huge issue, but I was already starting to see how overzealous replies were turning ppl off/feeding the trolls on Twitter/Insta as well as how ARMYs being welcoming was fostering ppl to stan the group, so I dropped a reminder. Then, lo and fucking behold, many of you here showed your asses and proved my point with the poorly researched ad hominems.

Chill. If you still don’t get it now, idk how to clarify further. Stay pressed or don’t. Either way, hop off my dick and next time pay attention to who you’re trying to bitch out. Also, while I do welcome genuine discourse, I have a policy about posting/responding to hatemail, so coming into my inbox with a whine and cheese dance about shit I already know only results in me rolling my eyes and deleting, just fyi. Don’t waste your time or mine.

[elliethesuperfruitlover]

*ahem*

so am i just gonna have to get specific representation MY DAMN SELF. i mean COME ON. im using my brain to finally work and think about the future and all that. and i feel like i’m being picky but im tired of busted up fucking plot holes and the same old shit every time. only the light skinned women or girls who’re considered conventionally attractive. and they’re either the “right size” or theyre dark skinned (the only one in the show) and have a fucking attitude. when the hell am i going to STOP being viewed as a threat, or a stereotype, and be seen as a fucking person???? with thoughts and feelings and input that deserves to be heard. ESPECIALLY IN THE MEDIA. i know black folks dont get much shit as is, and if we get something half decent, we’re shit all over, or killed, or it’s snatched. and if it isn’t taken from us, we treasure it, waiting for the next good thing to happen, billions of hardships throwing themselves at us. and specifically, as a black queer neurodivergent gal, there’s no fucking space for me. im not going to be seen, nor represented how i wish to be. i’m either a threat, nothing whatsoever, or the life, the being, and the moment until it’s inconvenient for white people to deal with. stealing things people have been ridiculed and teased for, and suddenly it’s all the fucking rage. then after it’s gone, i’m pushed to the curb again, fucking trampled by the same people who said i was at least partially equal to them. 

i cant find even a half decent place that i see myself where it’s not sprinkled, or dare i say, doused in anti-blackness and misogynoir. i mean, but it’s only a show, right? it’s not that big of a deal, shows can’t represent a group of people, or person as to where it impacts them, right?

then tell me why the princess and the frog is my favorite disney movie.....

tell me why hidden figures almost never goes unwatched whenever i see it.

tell me why i have been talking NON-STOP about invincible because a show has just a single black girl who speaks her mind, and is a BADASS.......but amber’s ripped to shreds isn’t she. she “was stupid from not telling mark her mind” and “she led him on” and “i hate amber more than omni-man” and “amber is the real villain” (which is laced with anti-blackness)

it’s because REPRESENTATION MATTERS, fuckass. i wouldnt binge watch things that i fucking hate. if i see myself in something, and it’s authentic, and it’s real, im holding onto it like my fucking life depends on it. oh wait? it does.

cant wear this or that. “she must think she’s grown” NOPE. but i sure as hell can legally work, get vaccinated, and have a learner’s permit. isn’t that “the life” isn’t that what i’m supposed to do? join the society that was broken to begin with until i crumble, lose my job, and find myself in the same place.

or no, i’m still just a child apparently. shouldn’t be speaking for myself, can’t make my own decisions. i “need to be taken down a peg”

and here come the stereotypes again. “angry black girl” “in someone’s face”

and of fucking course when i bring up the fact that something is racist then i need to “lower my voice” and “calm down” and am taken outside the door and told “this happens, just ignore it”

from the same motherfucker who doesn’t think that white privilege exists, calls m a feminist “derogatory” when i bring up the fact that something is sexist, and literally makes the joke “monkeys climb trees” when we were celebrating black history month, and one of the classroom doors was decorated with a tree. but apparently i need to “chill out” and let the cishet white person get their fucking way like they all have for the past hundreds of years.

that shit sucks. and it stings. and it stays tearing me apart at one in the fucking morning.

also (we’re not done, strap in)

if i see one more fucking person excuse homophobia with the bible, im fucking snapping and finding a girlfriend and posting the picture FRONT AND CENTER of my fucking instagram. or better yet i’ll finally find a pair of fishnets and do what the fuck i want without guzzling down the dredges of my personal disapproval for once. it sounds quite tempting to be honest at this point.

so, story time lovelies.

yesterday (well, er, two days ago, it was friday afternoon) one of my dearest (/j) classmates decided to post a story which held a screenshot of the bible where it mentioned that “a man shall not sleep with another man like he does with his wife” okay and the bible changes like night and day. there’s so many fucked up stories in the bible that justify this, that, and the other. and like?? you expect me to want to BELIEVE that shit. absolutely not. just say you’re a homophobe and LEAVE MY QUEER ASS ALONE. jesus fucking christ.

this isn’t the first time she’s posted something i found quite offensive, and frankly, rage inducing. it was the “there’s only two genders” and taking off 3 years of my life with the “man=penis, woman=vagina” BULLSHIT which is wrong on multiple accounts. intersex people exist and ARE REAL. and gender isn’t tied to genitalia. and it’s also not binary. and clothes and colors dont have GENDERS. they’re fabric and things we fucking see, not an end all be all to the type of person someone is, how they think, talk, act, and what fucking hangs between their legs. job prospects. none of that. another video from a few months back, still on the gender thing in which this cishet man stated (who probably has fucking guns laying on the mantle in front of the fireplace, right below the decapitated dear) that “kids are too young to think about this” little kids don’t give TWO SHITS about gender, they just see people as people, and they love their friends. their biggest worries are what’s for dinner, or who’s gonna play on what on the playground. if we teach them that OTHER TRANS KIDS EXIST. and that they deserve to be treated the same, we won’t have issues. at all. and if they end up being confused, let them ask questions, and answer them accordingly. IT’S NO BIG DEAL.

so...no. so she’s blocked (permanently) and i honestly don’t give a fuck at this point. i have no tolerance for bigotry in my life, or brain, and i have had, im sure, a LIFETIME full of toxic people who think shitty things about me and i just??? bitch? AM I PRESSED ABOUT IT? no. HAS IT CAUSED ME SLEEPLESS NIGHTS AND PANIC ATTACKS? of course, i have trauma and severe anxiety, what else did you expect?

yeah um....i think im done. this has just been RIPPING me to shreds for the past few minutes. had to get it out.