#i h8 myself bye

[ghoulish-art-tendencies]

Hi! Do you want to rant about space dementia? I always like learning about new songs and their meanings :)

Bye <3

I DO.!!1! Okay so let’s strap in bc this might be a little long. Sorry!!!

First i’ll put the put the song for reference

Okay to understand this analysis, you have to understand what “space dementia” actually is. Space dementia is a type of (fake) sickness that some astronauts will get, that makes them feel lonely/depressed, and that they or anything else doesn’t matter anymore. Basically because they’re in a giant space of literal nothing, it makes them feel so insignificant and also feel like just another nothing floating along in it.

Now, there is 2 separate analyses for this which might make this really long so..sorry. One looks at it through the more direct lense of space dementia, while the other is how Space Dementia can parallel the feelings of a toxic relationship. You can skip one or the other if you want and i’ll label them.

Also throughout this I will be saying him when referring to the person singing due to the person singing Matt Bellamy and I can differentiate what I am talking about.

SPACE DEMENTIA THROUGH A DIRECT LENSE:

“H8 is the one for me

It gives me all I need

And helps me coexist

With the chill, ooh”

Although this part is one of the few confusing bits to me, h8 is often used as hate in chat, which could be saying “hate helps me coexist with the chill” such as being cold and hateful yourself helps you coexist with the chill of space that makes you feel worthless.

“You make me sick

Because I adore you so

I love all the dirty tricks

And twisted games you play on me, ooh”

Okay starting off “you make me sick” is fairly obvious; space dementia is making him sick. “Because I adore you so” is interesting and i love this lyric. Obviously if you didnt love space you wouldnt go and be an astronaut and go into space in the first place. Its saying it exactly as it means: i love you so much that I came to see you for myself, even if im getting sick because of you. “i love all the dirty tricks / and the twisted games you play on me” is basically again saying he doesn’t care what space will do to him, he will still love it as it is.

“Space dementia in my eyes and

Peace will arise

And tear us apart

And make us meaningless again”

“space dementia in my eyes” is literally about how its consuming him and is inside him and how much its affecting him. “peace will arise / and tear us apart / and make us meaningless again” grouping these all together as they basically say the same thing. Saying that everything will eventually stop existing (either the sun consuming earth, black holes consuming space) and make them all meaningless again because everyone, everything will be forgotten, even himself (especially if hes stuck in space).

“You make us wanna die

I'd cut your name in my heart

We'll destroy this world for you

I know you want me to feel your pain, ooh”

“you make us want to die” again, makes the guy want to die bc of how depressed and meaningless its making him feel. “Id cut your name in my heart” he would do anything for space because he loves it so much. Carving your name into my heart is often seen as a metaphorical act of love. “we’ll destory this world for you” not entirely sure on this, but could just be a reaffirmation of literally doing anything. “i know you want me to feel your pain” space is the one inflicting this sickness onto him, making him feel lonely and empty just like space is.

After that is just repeating lyrics but thats Part 1.

-

SPACE DEMENTIA REPRESENTING A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP:

now, this is my favourite/most thought out interpretation, but there are so many different interpretations that follow a similar path of toxic relationship, so that’s what I will explain. If anyone else has thoughts please share though! <3

“H8 is the one for me

It gives me all I need

And helps me coexist

With the chill, ooh”

Hate is the one for me and the rest of this could be like how it helps him coexist in this world even though its not healthy. It could be like he is used to love being hateful possibly from trauma as a kid.

“You make me sick

Because I adore you so

I love all the dirty tricks

And twisted games you play on me, ooh”

Now starting on the actual toxic relationship, I will be talking about space as a person and referring to them as so, so don’t be confused (using she/her for space as well so it doesn’t get more confusing). “you make me sick / Because I adore you so” he loves her so much, so sticking around even though its making him feel horrible about himself. “I love all the dirty tricks / and twisted games you play on me” he loves them all because he loves her so much, even though they’re dirty and twisted. He can’t see past his love for her.

“Space dementia in my eyes and

Peace will arise

And tear us apart

And make us meaningless again”

“space dementia in my dementia” could be referring to how hes blinded by love, and how eventually everything will tear/fall apart and make everything that they had meaningless.

“You make us wanna die

I'd cut your name in my heart

We'll destroy this world for you

I know you want me to feel your pain, ooh”

“you make us want to die” space is making him want to kill himself becuase of her toxic behaviour. “id cut your name into my heart / we’ll destroy this world for you” he would do anything for her basically. “I know you want me to feel your pain” shes making him suffer, possibly disguising it as how shes suffering.

TLDR: or Basically, if that made no sense, this guy is stuck in a toxic relationship and he is too blinded by his lover for him to leave, and shes constantly hurting him, but he sees it as love. He would do anything for her, as he feels like nothing matters except her.

Now for side notes on why else I love the song beside the lyrics. I LOVE Matt Bellamy’s voice in this song specifically. The high notes he manages to pull off are just beautiful. Not only that but the instrumental at the end after the lyrics come to an end just ascends my body every time. It truly feels like you’re floating in space and that everything feels BIG around you, and yet empty. The song feels and sounds so sorrowful too and I think the emotions come through so well through both the vocals and backing track. Something that stuck with me that someone told me was “it sounds like a 70s art studio in the middle of the night” and GOD yeah it really does. Everything about the song is perfect and I hope I never get tired of it from playing it on repeat too much.

thank you for coming to my ted talk on Space Dementia. Sam try not to write a whole essay for every ask about a special interest challenge (IMPOSSIBLE). Im so glad to have this out of my system though and it probably made no sense whatsoever as all my thoughts are usually incoherent written down or said aloud. ^_^ Thanks for the ask and permission to rant and have a great day <3

[telly0uwhat]

i h8 myself for doing this. bye

[lavymaplemoon]

Finished scripting my first youtube video! It's an authortube introduction, so it's pretty easy and straightforward. Who am i? what do i write??? do i enjoy centaurs?

i hope i can get over my fear of the camera soon. i've never been photogenic, and until i find the lighting and angle combination that doesn't make me h8 myself, i'll stick to talk-sprites.

if i get rid of that insecurity, will i be able to speak when the film starts rolling? i don't know, when i perform in front of the camera it's like the biggest phantom audience i've ever faced, and they all use gossip forums and hate the way i move my mouth. it's bc *i* hate the way i move my mouth. until i'm comfortable nothing will get easier, and that's my entire life's struggle.fdjhfjd

i used to be a theatre kid! i performed all the time, in the heat of the summer, projecting my sonnets over the barrage of cicadas and police sirens. but cameras are robots and robots are scary (and sexy.) hey, by the way, one of my projects is a robot/scientist love story.

have a lot of writing work to do, platforming to figure out, life to take care of. ok bye!

[chappell-roans]

Timothée Chalamet attends the 94th Annual Academy Awards March 27, 2022

[cplusbass]

only elite gamers will reblog 👌🏼

[gyeheoni]

has this been done before

[fauxspirited]

i’m not even sure what i’m doing anymore 🙃

[tigerjpg]

i cant believe i got an ask about my favourite bands and i forgot to mention. my favourite band. queen

[cowedboy]

tempted 2 draw myself bein gay but *side eyes chapter 4 of tffc*

[mythologicalidiots]

.

[chrvstenpress]

non woso related, but i love my school and being able to live with views like this

[bonecage]

[raidsent-a-blog]

❛ Hey! ⎯⎯⎯ hey, wait up, ❜ jogging up to Jade upon catching sight of her in the lot, Stiles mindlessly thumbed at the straps of his backpack, sneaker-clad feet falling into an expectedly graceless stride alongside her.  ❛ ⎯⎯⎯ what’re your plans now? After...all of this, I mean? I don’t think I ever got around to asking. ❜    // @xbycode   sc.

[sawthetruthinme]

the funniest part about my conversation w taylor is when she complimented my hair bc *that* was the moment that i suddenly decided to get emotional when i was trying SO hard to keep it together the whole time,, so i started tearing up while talking about my bangs?? literally for no reason?? it was the stupidest thing.. and i could tell that taylor thought i was gonna say something emotional about my life bc she was looking at me w so much empathy and had her you have every ounce of my attention face on, but no... psych... i just couldn’t hold myself together long enough to say “thanks i just got them cut” and move on... and i could tell she didn’t really know what to say bc i got emotional over literally nothing so she just went in for another hug akdjdjfjncns

[leeknown]

.

[justastraightupmess]

yknow i could go to class today. but also i skipped yesterday so i might as well skip todays classes too ;o