#i guess u can see that i love snow filters a lot ?

[han-jisung]

ミ★ 9 selcas of 2019 ミ★

i was tagged by those lovely people: @minknows + @glowsvt + @bincore @kmwoojins 💞

+ i'm tagging: @staykiz @chrryjin @kittylixie @yongbok-s @honeyboyfelix @seunie @snowyjisungs @bunnyminho @littleaprilcherryblossom

[vannahfanfics]

“Well, here is my description: I am a girl who loves to read, video games, draw and animated series (and also anime). I like guys who can talk about anything and who are affectionate. And I have a soft spot for bad guys. My dream is to become a psychologist to help people overcome their problems and become the people they once were and even better, and also because I like to analyze people. I hope this gives you an idea. <3″ 

@eu-ayk, Thank you for your patience! As you can imagine, medical school is grueling so I’ve gotten a bit behind on all my projects ^u^” I’m working hard to finish them all up though! So, your match-up!

I match you with...

Hatsuharu Sohma from Fruits Basket!

Yep, this is the one! Hatsuharu shares a lot of interests with you, especially videogames— there’s nothing he enjoys more than just lazing around with you doing some gaming, whether you’re playing against one another, cooperating, or playing two totally different games. He’s also somewhat into anime, especially because a lot of the younger kids like it, and he’s not a picky guy; he goes with the flow and will do whatever will make you happy! 

Hatsuharu is really laid-back and chill, and not afraid to say what’s on his mind most of the time. So that makes him a great guy to talk to, whether it be idle chatter or deep 2 a.m. philosophical rants. He loves to listen to you, too, ramble on about any old thing. Honestly, he’s just affectionate all around; this man is not shy when it comes to showing his partner he loves them! Such a sweetheart. 

He also thinks it’s great that you want to be a psychologist and help others! He and his family have suffered a lot, so it makes him proud that you want to devote your life to helping people overcome their traumas. He will 1000% come to you trying to get tips to try and give Yuki LOL, it’s really funny. 

Now, you said you like bad boys (don’t we all)? While Haru is sweet most of the time, sometimes the boy just has to snap... So here’s how it goes the first time you witness “Dark Haru”!:

Kyo’s got a smart mouth; we all know this. Most of the time, haru is able to just ignore the bristly cat boy, but, well... The first time Kyo pops off with something not-so-nice about you, Haru just snaps. 

Like, he has instantly flipped Kyo over judo-style, flat on his back on the tatami floor, leaving him stunned. Haru’s face is screwed up in a taunting sneer as he just eggs Kyo on to go scrap it out a couple rounds in the front yard, while Shigure is already opening the sliding door to keep it from getting damaged (again). 

Everyone looks to you in shock, expecting you to be startled by Haru’s sudden switch in mood, and are surprised to find you... blushing? 

Oh yes, you’re secret affection for bad boys has suddenly come to light... You can’t help but be exhilarated, seeing Haru acting so tough! And he’s gonna take notice, too, grabbing your chin and flirting hard. It’s a wonder you don’t faint from your heart rate sailing through the roof!

Of course, all it takes is Yuki lightly whapping Haru upside the head to get him to switch back to his normal, calm demeanor. Ignoring Kyo entirely, he just asks if you’re okay and if that side of him scared you... 

He’s a little baffled when you meekly explain that you kind of found it hot, LOL. Shigure is laughing it up in the background making all sorts of innuendos, and Kyo is still on his back, wondering where in life he went wrong. Well, Haru is at least relieved that his alternate personality doesn’t frighten you... That makes things easier.

So, I mentioned Hatsuharu loves to talk about anything and everything. You guys sure would have some weird conversations, especially as the night deepens and you get a little delirious with lack of sleep. Here’s a look at how one of those conversations might go!:

The starlight filtered in through the half-open window, which allowed the curtains to ripple gently, splaying ever-shifting shadows across your bedroom floor. You and Hatsuharu were sprawled on the bed, with you snuggled up into his side with one of his arms looped around your middle. His other casually propped himself up in the pillows, as he kept his gaze trained on you rambling on about some topic in psychology he had no idea about. Not that he cared; he loved to listen to you ramble all the same. 

After your voice fades into sleepy silence, Haru perks up, “You ever wonder if you’re the only person in the world, and everyone else you just imagined to keep from being lonely?” 

You sit up with a snort, a look of both amusement and incredulity on your face. “I’m just asking a question,” he pouts as you regard him with a shake of your head. “It’s weird to think about, right? Like, I know I exist, but how do you really know anyone else exists?” 

“You’re a dork,” you assure him with a playful nod. He purses his lips and narrows his pretty snow-white eyebrows at you, prompting you to gently punch him in the shoulder. “I’m just kidding. I guess I’ve thought something along those lines before... I’ve also wondered if we’re all simulations being controlled by aliens.” 

“Like the Sims?” 

“Yeah!” 

“That would explain why I walk into a room and suddenly forget what I came in there for,” he postulates with a look of revelation. You laugh, the sound ringing through the quiet bedroom and floating out your window into the night. Humming in contentment, you flop back down into the bed, half of your body slung over Hatsuharu. He didn’t mind —  he never did — and gently held your hips in his hands as you smiled sweetly up at him. 

“Well, even if you aren’t real, I’m still glad you’re a figment of my imagination, Haru.” 

“That’s sweet, but also kind of frightening.” 

Giggling, you shuffled up a little to press a kiss to the tip of his nose. Haru wasn’t satisfied with that, chasing your face as it retreated to kiss your lips longingly — like he really was afraid you weren’t real. You melted into his touch, his presence, and took comfort in his embrace as the night deepened around you. 

Well, if you were a Sim after all, you were grateful to your alien overlord for giving you such a great boyfriend, at least. 

Interested in a commission? Check out this post!

[garbagequeer]

hey hello im writing a piece for laptop ensemble that involves sampling and i need the most repressed/tender/yearning quotes you got. just as gay and heart wrenching as you can. but also no pressure I know youre a stranger on the web I just feel like you post that kind of stuff a lot thank you bye

hope this isnt like too late school keeps me busy :( (also can you put a read more on asks? guess i’ll find out). i ended up choosing many quotes from the same texts cause im indecisive as shit but i’ll bold my favorites from those in case that makes it easier for you!

anyways first of all you can never go wrong w richard siken as obvious as that is. these are both from you are jeff

You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won’t tell you that he loves you, but he loves you. And you feel like you’ve done something terrible, like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills, or shoveled yourself a grave in the dirt, and you’re tired. You’re in a car with a beautiful boy, and you’re trying not to tell him that you love him, and you’re trying to choke down the feeling, and you’re trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you’ve discovered something you don’t even have a name for.

Let’s say you’ve swallowed a bad thing and now it’s got its hands inside you. This is the essence of love and failure. You see what I mean but you’re happy anyway, and that’s okay, it’s a love story 

this one’s from planet of love (the format got fucked bc tumblr is not actually a finctional website but :/ )

I have a megaphone and you play along,                                                                 because you want to die for love,                                                            you always have.     Imagine this:You’re pulling the car over. Somebody’s waiting.                      You’re going to die                                            in your best friend’s arms.             And you play along because it’s funny, because it’s written down,you’ve memorized it,

from litany in which certain things are crossed out 

I make you pancakes, I take you hunting, I talk to you as if you’re            really there.Are you there, sweetheart? Do you know me? Is this microphone live?                                                       Let me do it right for once,

sorry about the scene at the bottom of the stairwell                                    and how I ruined everything by saying it out loud.            Especially that, but I should have known.You see, I take the parts that I remember and stitch them back together            to make a creature that will do what I sayor love me back.

We were inside the train car when I started to cry. You were crying too,            smiling and crying in a way that made meeven more hysterical. You said I could have anything I wanted, but I                                                                                just couldn’t say it out loud.Actually, you said Love, for you,                             is larger than the usual romantic love. It’s like a religion. It’s                                                                                                 terrifying. No one                                                                        will ever want to sleep with you.

from snow and dirty rain

I had a dream about you. We were in the gold roomwhere everyone finally gets what they want.

that scene from when harry met sally where sally says:

One day I was taking Alice’s little girl fro the afternoon. I’d promised to take her to the circus, and we were in a cab playing “I spy” - you know, “I spy a lamppost”, “I spy a mailbox” - and she looked out the window and there was this man and this woman with two little kids, and the man had one of the kids on his shoulders, and Alice’s little girl said “I spy a family”, and I satrted crying, you know? I just started crying, and I went home

(like anyone else sometimes cries when u see a family doing something nice? is it because i want to participate in a sense of family of my own but have been excluded as a gay person from it’s portrayals and it makes me go :^( cause i dont feel there’s room for me there but i want there to be and i just have to long for this nuclear family heteronormative way of life that i’ve been made to believe is idylic? is it because my parents got divorced and my dad’s an ass and my mom is just a very angry lady and i want to re-do my own childhood? who knows. should we ban movies? yes we should!)

from maurice (ultimate source of tender)

“There was something better in life than this rubbish, if only he could get to it, love, nobility, big spaces where passion clasped peace, spaces no science could reach, but they existed for ever, full of woods some of them, and arched with majestic sky and a friend”

‘Did you ever dream you had a friend, Alec? Nothing else but just “my friend”, he trying to help you and you him. A friend’ he repeated, sentimental suddenly. ‘Someone to last your whole life and you his. I suppose such a thing can’t really happen outside sleep’

we are all so lucky i don’t actually own maurice in english this would just turn into me quoting the whole book

ee cummings voices to voices, lip to lip

the thing perhaps isto eat flowers and not to be afraid.

from virgina woolf’s letters to vita

7 september 1925

january 21 1926 vita writes

I am reduced to a thing that wants Virginia. I composed a beautiful letter to you in the sleepless nightmare hours of the night, and it has all gone: I just miss you, in a quite simple desperate human way. You, with all your un-dumb letters, would never write so elementary phrase as that; perhaps you wouldn’t even feel it. And yet I believe you’ll be sensible of a little gap. But you’d clothe it in so exquisite a phrase that it would lose a little of its reality. Whereas with me it is quite stark: I miss you even more than I could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal. So this letter is just really a squeal of pain. It is incredible how essential to me you have become. I suppose you are accustomed to people saying these things. Damn you, spoilt creature; I shan’t make you love me any the more by giving myself away like this—But oh my dear, I can’t be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don’t love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defences. And I don’t really resent it …

and on january 26 virginia writes back

Your letter from Trieste came this morning—But why do you think I don’t feel, or that I make phrases? ‘Lovely phrases’ you say which rob things of reality. Just the opposite. Always, always, always I try to say what I feel. Will you then believe that after you went last Tuesday—exactly a week ago—out I went into the slums of Bloomsbury, to find a barrel organ. But it did not make me cheerful … And ever since, nothing important has happened—Somehow its dull and damp. I have been dull; I have missed you. I do miss you. I shall miss you. And if you don’t believe it, you’re a longeared owl and ass. Lovely phrases? … 

from virginia’s diary, about vita on december 21 1925

I like her and being with her and the splendour–she shines in the grocer’s shop in Sevenoaks with a candle lit radiance, stalking on legs like beech trees, pink glowing, grape clustered, pearl hung.

from virginia woolf’s to the light house

What device for becoming, like waters poured into one jar, inextricably the same, one with the object one adored? Could the body achieve, or the mind, subtly mingling in the intricate passages of the brain? or the heart? Could loving, as people called it, make her and Mrs Ramsay one? for it was not knowledge but unity that she desired, not inscriptions on tablets, nothing that could be written in any language known to men, but intimacy itself, which is knowledge, she had thought, leaning her head on Mrs Ramsay’s knee. Nothing happened. Nothing! Nothing! as she leant her head against Mrs Ramsay’s knee. And yet, she knew knowledge and wisdom were stored up in Mrs Ramsay’s heart.

Love had a thousand shapes. There might be lovers whose gift it was to choose out the elements of things and place them together and so, giving them a wholeness not theirs in life, make of some scene, or meeting of people (all now gone and separate), one of those globed compacted things over which thought lingers, and love plays.

there forced themselves upon her other things, her own inadequacy, her insignificance, keeping house for her father off the Brompton Road, and had much ado to control her impulse to fling herself (thank Heaven she had always resisted so far) at Mrs Ramsay’s knee and say to her—but what could one say to her? “I’m in love with you?” No, that was not true. “I’m in love with this all,” waving her hand at the hedge, at the house, at the children. It was absurd, it was impossible 

(fun fact: the spanish translation adds something that i’d translate as “one could not say what one meant / what one wanted to say”, which i really like and i was disapointed to find out isnt on the english edition)

It was love, she thought, pretending to move her canvas, distilled and filtered; love that never attempted to clutch its object; but, like the love which mathematicians bear their symbols, or poets their phrases, was meant to be spread over the world and become part of the human gain. So it was indeed. The world by all means should have shared it  

from the great gatsby

I didn’t want to go to the city. I wasn’t worth a decent stroke of work but it was more than that—I didn’t want to leave Gatsby. I missed that train, and then another, before I could get myself away (…) Just before I reached the hedge I remembered something and turned around. ‘They’re a rotten crowd,’ I shouted across the lawn. ‘You’re worth the whole damn bunch put together.’ I’ve always been glad I said that. It was the only compliment I ever gave him

from kafka’s diaries

may 27 1911: Today is your birthday, but I am not even sending you the usual book, for it would be only pretence; at bottom I am after all not in position to give you a book. I am writing only because it is so necessary for me today to be near you for a moment

parts from a from a letter he wrote to oskar pollak on february 4 1902

When we talk together the words are hard; we tread over them as if they were rough pavement. The most delicate things acquire awkward feet and we can’t help it. We’re almost in each other’s way; I bump into you and you - I don’t dare and you. When we come to things that are not exactly cobblestones or the Kunstwart, we suddenly see that we are in masquerade, acting with angular faces (especially me, I admit), and then we become sad and bored. Does anyone make you as bored as I do?

then I fall silent and you fall silent and you become bored, and I become bored and it’s all like a stupid hangover and there’s no use lifting a hand. But neither wants to say this to the other, out of shame or fear or - You see, we are afraid of each other, or I am.

Of course I understand it. It’s boring to stand for years in front of an ugly wall and it just won’t crumble away. Of course, but the wall is afraid for itself, fro the garden (if there is one), and you get out of sorts, yawn, have headaches, don’t know where to turn

You often talk with her, not only for the sake of talking. You walk around with her somewhere here or there, or in Roztok, and i sit at my desk at home. You talk with her, and in the middle of a sentence somebody jumps up and makes a bow. That is me with my untrimmed words and angular faces. That lasts only a moment, and then you go on talking. I sit at my desk at home and yawn. I’ve been trhough it already. Wouldn’t that separate us? Is that so strange? Are we enemies? I am very fond of you

from his leters to milena

Last night I dreamed about you. What happened in detail I can hardly remember, all I know is that we kept merging into one another. I was you, you were me. Finally you somehow caught fire.

jane wong. from clearing

We want to believe everything has meaning.Plums blossom over a power grid

and I am in love again. The shame of it.

from leslie harrison’s [sirens]

I’m not Penelope married to faith married to waitingbound in fine soft strands of silk dyed and stretchedin my world longing has teeth and fins has a tastefor blood longing is a room built entirely of knives

Lorde’s melodrama tour interlude

Don’t you wish you could go inside a heart, see the strings and atrium’s, everything beating and bleeding. It’s kind of funny, I spend almost every minute thinking about love. Being guided, and divided by love. But I’ve never seen it. It’s just a rumour, a comedown, an afterglow. I wanna see it, in colour. In the summer, I can almost picture it

from Andrea Long Chu’s on liking women

One day, you tell yourself, it will give you what you want. Then, one day, it doesn’t. Now it dawns on you that your object will probably never give you what you want. But this is not what’s disappointing, not really. What’s disappointing is what happens next: nothing. You keep your object. You continue to follow it around, stash it in a drawer, water it, tweet at it. It still doesn’t give you what you want—but you knew that. You have had another realization: not getting what you want has very little to do with wanting it. Knowing better usually doesn’t make it better. You don’t want something because wanting it will lead to getting it. You want it because you want it

ada limón, In a Mexican Restaurant I Recall How Much You Upset Me

But love is impossible and it goes ondespite the impossible. You’re the muscleI cut from the bone and still the boneremembers, still it wants (so much, it wants)the flesh back, the real thing,if only to rail against it, if onlyto argue and fight, if only to missa solve-able absence.

i dont think i need to get into mitski songs because you probably already know but basically pink in the night/come into the water/once more to see you/in happy when she says if you’re going take the train so i can hear it rumble one last rumble/in i want you from the first verse to the first time she goes “i just need a quiet place where i can scream how i love you” (YES the card thing is very important)/the first verse of i will (w emphasis on everything you feel is good i f you wold only let you)/abbey/strawberry blond

sufjan steven’s futile devices obviously predatory wasp of the palisades you know the drill 

was going to find some twin fantasy lyrics but i started thinking about famous prophets (minds) and like. emotionally left my body so. i wont be thinking about it or any other songs anymore it makes me too crazy

from frances ha

It’s that thing when you’re with someone and you love them and they know it and they love you and you know it but it’s a party and you’re both talking to other people and you’re laughing and shining and you look across the room and catch each other’s eyes. But not because you’re possessive, or it’s precisely sexual, but because that is your person in this life and it’s funny and sad but only because this life will end and it’s this secret world that exists right there. In public. Unnoticed. That no one else knows about. It’s sort of like how they say that other dimensions exist all around us but we don’t have the ability to perceive them. That’s what I want out of a relationship. Or just life, I guess.

from ellen lee’s notes on twin fantasy that i revisit constantly

there’s no going back to deliver these words to the ones they were really meant for. That’s how heartbreak feels, I guess. It feels like your heart in between the teeth of someone who’s looking away. When you’ve lost your loved object, what happens to all the things you have to say to them? When they’re turned away, what happens to all the things that you couldn’t, but desperately need(ed) to, say to their face? He dissociates himself from his own romance until it becomes a fantasy. You have your bleeding heart, you have a finite set of memories — when nothing new enters and you’re unwilling to let go, then you have a fantasy. The loved object enters into you and transforms.

the journey home by dermot bolger(havent read this at all dont really plan to/dont know a thing about it either i just came across this shit like 2 years ago and i still think about it)

I wanted to hurt him; I wanted just to touch him. What I wanted I’m not really sure. If he had stopped and opened his arms I would have walked towards him; I would have sat on the kerb all night with him

adam b, sweet i have a (really gay) heart

i feel like my body is the extension of a lake. i feel really badabout not telling you the truth, sometimes. i feelreally small next to you. tall boys remind me of bean stalks.i wish i had your legs. i wish i could know your handsbefore i even touch them

aaaand i think that’s all i could think of and track down, hope this is actually helpful and not too long (i am indecisive no kidding). also ksjdfg it’s nice that you thought to ask me this and i did have fun going over all these quotes so thank you 💖💖💖

[thestaffofgrayson]

1-100 for the unusual asks, you meme lord

Mmmmkay so I cant help being sassy but also wanna give a real answer so we gonna do this -> Anything in parenthesis is a real answer everything else is sass central station

1) Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?  Im a dank soundcloud rapper check out my soundcloud at nobodycares540.soundcloud.fuck (I dont really use any of em tbh)

2) is your room messy or clean? *glances over* clean (m e s s y)

3) what color are your eyes? All 16 of em are different colors actually (blue)

4) do you like your name? why? No because its not Jojo (Yes!!! Love the name Perrin gonna be honest)

5) what is your relationship status? *sets status to its complicated* you could say im a bit of a player (deathly single)

6) describe your personality in 3 words or less? Im sorry who? (Described meme lord)

7) what color hair do you have? Minecraft Steve Brown (Ver Ver Pink)

8) what kind of car do you drive? color? No I run like sonic next question (nope fuck driving fuck boulder)

9) where do you shop? Uuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh (For what Next question)

10) how would you describe your style? Goku Black cosplay (Goku Black cosplay)

11) favorite social media account? The one with the Z U C C (Tumblr fuck snapchat)

12) what size bed do you have?  Uuuummmmmmm my size OBVIOUSLY next questions (Dont know tbh queen maybe?)

13) any siblings? Little shit brother (thats not even a joke)

14) if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?  Why this world fuck you what about mars (uuuuhhhhhh no idea gonna be honest)

15) favorite snapchat filter? Oh man! Love this one altho its not well known what ya gotta do is hit the delete button and when it asks if youre sure say yes :D (they change so often I dont pay attention)

16) favorite makeup brand(s)? Whatever it is Genji uses as eyeliner (dooont wear makeup)

17) how many times a week do you shower? I get clean by rolling around in the snow so maybe like 3 times a year (depends usually once a day with exceptions)

18) favorite tv show? I dont watch tv I AM the tv (The Office or if its Anime then Jojos Bizarre Adventure)

19) shoe size? M Y   S I Z E (size 10)

20) how tall are you?  hOWs ThE wEaTHEr dOwnTHeRe (5′9 - 5′11 somewhere in there)

21) sandals or sneakers? Gadget Shoes (legit those are cool but sneakers)

22) do you go to the gym? I think theeessseeee muscles speak for themselves (nope but I do martial arts)

23) describe your dream date  Killing all mortals and achieving a state beyond that of a god (iiiii dont know I dont really see myself going on a date)

24) how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? Why do YOU wanna know (no really why tho)

25) what color socks are you wearing? Well I’m at home on the sofa playing sonic the hedgehog and typing up responses to an ask on tumblr that about 5 people are gonna see. That being said, Dragon Ball orange. (not wearing em but I have a fuzzy pair of polar bear socks my friend Ana sent me that I love!)

26) how many pillows do you sleep with? Wait what do you mean not everyone sleeps with 25 pillows are they mad? (One for my head, one on each side, smol pillow, pillow pet)

27) do you have a job? what do you do? I am assistant regional manager at a paper supply company named Dunder Mifflin. (Not currently but I’m gonna apply to Gamestop and Costco here soon)

28) how many friends do you have? Toooooooooooooo many I hate mortals (honestly I’m too lazy to try and count rn)

29) whats the worst thing you have ever done? Well I haven’t seen Mulan don’t call the cops (Iiiiiiii’m not sure I guess cheated on my Chinese final freshman year but hey I needed to pass that)

30) whats your favorite candle scent? V o i d  (I dont use candles that much and I shooouuulld)

31) 3 favorite boy names Jo[seph] Jo[estar], Jo[taro Ku]jo, Jo[nathan] Jo[estar]  (uuuuhhhh I like my name so it would be Perrin, Joji, Donovan)

32) 3 favorite girl names Jolyne Kujo there is no 2 and 3 (Jolyne yes I know but I actually really like the name, Perrin is also a girls name so, Milly)

33) favorite actor? Shrek from Shrek the musical (Robert Downey Jr and Chris pratt)

34) favorite actress? Taylor after she sasses me and acts like nothing happened (Millie Bobby Brown)

35) who is your celebrity crush? McCree (Matt Mercer)

36) favorite movie? UM IS THIS A QUESTION LIKE??? OBVIOUSLY THE SHREK AND BEE MOVIE CROSS OVER SHREK B: HONEY AND SWAMPS (I LOVED Black Panther and Thor Ragnarok but Secret Life of Walter Mitty’s stuck with me for a loooong time)

37) do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? I don’t read cuz I’m not a NERD (I mean actual books I don’t ask me about it another time but comics I sure do I love the Marvel Civil War storyline)

38) money or brains? They say Money can’t buy happiness but it can buy me more games! Eat that SUCKERS (Honestly brains because then you can be smart which can make you a lot of money. So many more benefits)

39) do you have a nickname? what is it? Perriushium, destroyer of life and bringer of the new age (Pey given to me by my brother when he was still a baby and couldn’t say my name)

40) how many times have you been to the hospital? Enough to be immune to every disease known to man NOW IM UNSTOPABLE MWAHAHA (none for any of my own conditions or injuries but for family stuff about twice)

41) top 10 favorite songs All Star, All Star, All Star, Chum Drum Bedrum, All Star, All Star, All Star, Never gonna give you up, All Star, All Star (Bloody Stream, Sono Chi no Sadame, Flying Battery Zone, Stardust Speedway, Stand Proud, Goku Black theme, Halo theme, The Apparition, Shovel Knight main theme, Hooked on a Feeling)

42) do you take any medications daily? I take a shot of cold hard whiskey when I get up (nope I dont have anything)

43) what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) The largest organ of my body I’ll tell ya that much (I honestly dont know?? Smooth and soft I guess?)

44) what is your biggest fear? The Communists lol jk Communism is the only way (I’m not so sure on this one gonna be honest I do fear something I just cant think of it at the moment)

45) how many kids do you want? I mean I’m a 16 year old teenager in high school with no job and no relationship that being said 5 (NONE EVER NOPE 0 KIDS)

46) whats your go to hair style? Super Saiyan 3 (Idk I just kinda comb it to the left)

47) what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) All Star. Wait fuck wrong quest- (Two floor medium sized house) 

48) who is your role model?  Uuuuuuuuhhhhhh (uuuuuhhhhhhhhhh)

49) what was the last compliment you received? A like on my post we did it guys we hit one like so I’m here making this 1 like special (I was told that everytime my friend see’s my dyed hair it absolutely makes his day :D) 

50) what was the last text you sent? Yeah that’ll be $5000 for the kill nice doing business with you (Maaaannny pictures of Genji Shimada)

51) how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? WHAT SANTA ISNT REAL????!!!!!?!?!?! (It kinda faded over the years my last strands of belief were gone by 12)

52) what is your dream car? Odie’s car from Garfield Kart (The Mach 5 from speed racer there’s a street legal car look it up)

53) opinion on smoking? Jotaro does it so I do it too (PSA: Smoking doesn’t make you cool or look cool you’re just killng your lungs. I won’t try and make you stop as long as you’re aware I don’t want you smoking around me and you understand the consequences)

54) do you go to college? After that SAT I meeeaaaaannnn McDonalds might be hiring (I’m still in High School but I want to)

55) what is your dream job? To stand in a corner for 8 hours with a lamp shade over my head and make a clicking sound every so often (I would like to be able to draw, animate, design and/or play games for a living. Achievement Hunter would be a fantastic job but I doubt that’s happening)

56) would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? I wanna live in a cloud In the sky and abduct people to harvest their DNA and make clones which I can fight to the death with (eh somewhere quiet and disconnected from people tbh)

57) do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? They fetch pretty high prices on eBay you’d be surprised (Nope I dont use them at all I bring my own and take my own)

58) do you have freckles? My face is a giant freckle little known fact (not really thank god I would look real bad with em)

59) do you smile for pictures? *leans in* I’m gonna let ya in on a secret kid. I wait until the photographer is just about to take the picture and then I hold a middle finger over my face to block the proper shot. Do it enough times then they’ll be payin YOU to get the picture done (I do but I only open my mouth slightly)

60) how many pictures do you have on your phone? They’re all of people I’ve killed because they showed me a stale meme dont worry about it (960 exactly and they’re all either memes, fan-art, or my cute friends)

61) have you ever peed in the woods? Ew no I don’t go outdoors thanks (Yep once on a school field trip in which we hiked to the top of a mountain it was fun)

62) do you still watch cartoons? Well I mean SOME ONE spoiled my belief in Santa earlier so I’m a bit too old for that now. I have a boring desk job thanks LAZLO (I do spongebob is really funny to me still and I LOVE the original Teen Titans)

63) do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? McWendy’s next question (I dont eat either so)

64) Favorite dipping sauce? Drip dip dip I’m boutta rip please i want to die (I dont use dipping sauce either call me a heathen all you want)

65) what do you wear to bed? Well I take off the clothes I wore for the day, take off my earring, ring, necklace, eyes, hair, 3 layers of skin, and call it a night (Pajamas mostly and sometimes sweatpants)

66) have you ever won a spelling bee? *Obligatory Bee Movie Joke* (I’ve never even heard of a spelling bee in any of the schools I’ve been to)

67) what are your hobbies? Well I like to kill all mortals #ZamasuWasRight  (I enjoy martial arts, drawing, video games, game design, and walking around my house with nothing to do)

68) can you draw? UH BOI YOU DONT KNOW WHAT ART IS UNTIL YOUVE SEEN A SHITTY JOJO DRAWING OF MINE (I mean yeah but not well)

69) do you play an instrument? Electric Triangle (Actually, I play the Violin but not super well)

70) what was the last concert you saw? SORRY WHAT I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF THE CONCERT (I’ve never been to one that seems like the opposite of fun for me personally I hate hyper loud music, people, and crowds)

71) tea or coffee? Coftea next question (tea. I don’t drink caffeine if i can help it)

72) Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? I need my sugar sonic rings (Again, Don’t drink caffeine)

73) do you want to get married? I’m already getting married. MARRIED TO THE LIFE OF CRIME THAT IS UP TOP (I mean I would like to one day)

74) what is your crush’s first and last initial? My  Self (I don’t have anyone I’m crushing on)

75) are you going to change your last name when you get married? What’s crimes last name? Smigglesworth? (If my partners last name is something with an S cuz then I can be PJS)

76) what color looks best on you? You know the color mario turns when he uses the super star? T-that (Pink and Black)

77) do you miss anyone right now? PPFFFFFT NOOOOO WHATS A FEEL *CRIES* THOSE ARENT TEARS ITS JUST SWEAT IVE ANSWERED A LOT OF QUESTIONS OKAY (I miss all my internet friends :(  *cries*)

78) do you sleep with your door open or closed? It is neither open nor closed it is in a hyper dimensional state between open and closed in which no mortal can enter or exit but also cannot be blocked from passage (clooossed because otherwise the cats are gonna kill my fish)

79) do you believe in ghosts? I mean how else would I make a long and successful career as a ghost buster (I do!)

80) what is your biggest pet peeve? My pet, Peeve! Biggest one I know! (depends on for what tbh the other day a guest speaker was talking to the class and this kid was playing music in his headphones really really loud and it pissed me off)

81) last person you called? Called what? Called them a nerd? A good bean? A meme? MAKE MORE SENSE YOU ******* **** *** ******** (Well according to my phone, the name listed is “Mom”)

82) favorite ice cream flavor? I’ll ice your cream if you’re not careful (Vanilla with chocolate syrup mixed together is hella everyone GO TRY IT)

83) regular oreos or golden oreos? The fuck is a golden oreo?? (No seriously, what the actual is a golden oreo)

84) chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? *mario invincible star song plays as I flash color and dash down rainbow road* I’ll have to think about it (rainboooowww!)

85) what shirt are you wearing? Well I…. You see… The thing is…. excuse me for one second (yeah I can’t think of sass to this one but my favorite shirt! Sonic mania that my friend Tasha bought for me and I love it!!!)

86) what is your phone background?  RYUJIN NO KEN WO KURAE!! “What do you think of this color? Is it not beautiful?” If you dont know those HOW DARE YOU LEARN THEM AND WE ARE WATCHING DRAGON BALL (Genji lock screen and Goku Black home screen)

87) are you outgoing or shy? Does THIS answer your question >:D (Outgoing when I want to be, but I’m antisocial so it’s like I CAN be outgoing and personable but it’s highly on my terms ya feel?)

88) do you like it when people play with your hair? My hair is a pride to my race the Saiyans hair is a sacred thing I will advise you not to touch it (YYYEEESSSS I LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE DO THAT BUT THAT HARDLY EVER HAPPENS)

89) do you like your neighbors?  …..the what? Never heard of it before is that a type of appliance? (I mean they’re chill we don’t interact a lot which I’m cool with)

90) do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? Nothin can cure this ugly face fest of spring 2018 (I use face wash when I shower which is typically right after school not sure why it matters but there ya go :V)

91) have you ever been high? “I’m high on LIFE maaaannn” -Incorrect Shaggy quotes (N o p e  never have don’t plan on it)

92) have you ever been drunk? shots ShotS SHOTS SHOTSSHOTSHOTS (nope but I will one day maybe in College years)

93) last thing you ate? The shattering realization that my friends will keep saying OWO to me every chance they get (Pancakes! asked for french toast but I loooove the breakfast food so no complaints)

94) favorite lyrics right now someBODY Once Told Me The World Is Gonna Roll Me… (The lyrics to Bloody Stream dude it’s a  g r e a t  op)

95) summer or winter? Sorry I’m on Mars weather its ZXAR right now (eeehhhh winter cuz then I have an excuse to be inside and it’s also the ski season)

96) day or night? I am the darkness. I am the night. I am BATMAN (Night honestly I’m a fan of the darkness)

97) dark, milk, or white chocolate? Plllleeeeaaase its like asking if you’re heart is pure of evil or not. Dark Chocolate is a sin (Milk chocolate is the best chocolate fight me on that)

98) favorite month? See, some may argue for their birthday months, christmas, new beginnings to the year, but I say there’s only ONE spooky time :3 (Altho I’m one of the fools that’s gonna have to go with March because it usually has my favorite kind of weather for where I live)

99) what is your zodiac sign  I refuse to go by Zodiac signs until Ted Cruz is proven to be the Zodiac Kill————–”OLD MEME ALERT THIS IS THE MEME POLICE”   “I AINT GOIN BACK TO JAIL”  (Cancer! I wear a necklace of my sign all the time fun fact for ya)

100) who was the last person you cried in front of?  Me after writing all these (Don’t know actually I try not to cry in front of people ever)

[willag42]

Yuri!!! On Ice Fanfic Recs with Reviews  ["I” Authors]

Note: Doing some major reformating of the YOI fanfic rec pages. The pages that include my reviews are now having the posts separated alphabetically by author (see below). I am also creating separate page(s) that allow filtering the fanfics by category. It's a work in progress, but I'm having fun with it.

This page includes my YOI fanfic recs (with reviews) for authors whose names begin with "I".

Note: For any authors whom I don't know the gender, I refer to them with they/them. If any authors wish to correct me, please do so.

AUTHORS REC PAGES: #0-9 -- A -- B -- C -- D -- E -- F -- G -- H -- I -- J -- K -- L -- M -- N -- O -- P -- Q -- R -- S -- T -- U -- V -- W -- X -- Y -- Z

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Refer to this masterlist for all of my YOI fanfic recs.

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IDetestTragedy

Circus! on Ice (Series, 2 works)

Eventide Enchantment Rating: Teen -- Words: 14.8k -- Status: Complete -- Summary: For marketing’s sake, the lead star of the Circus! on Ice troupe wore a female disguise to hand out brochures. Finding himself surrounded by troublesome suitors in a bar, Victor fled while snatching a quiet bespectacled soldier. "Victoria" flirted with the soldier, jokingly asking for a kiss. However, the soldier affirmed that he wanted to kiss only the person he loved: Victor Nikiforov. Thus, "she" demanded him a dance as a compensation for their ruined date, and guess who fell in love for real during that dance?

The Ice Magician's Apprentice Rating: Explicit -- Words: 85.4 -- Status: WIP -- Summary: Becoming a new employee of the Circus! on Ice came with a lot of responsibilities. Could Yuuri live up to everyone's expectation as the apprentice of the world-famous Ice Magician? As for his sleeping arrangement, did staying in the same bed as Victor Nikiforov count as a privilege or a constant heart-attack? ❤❤❤❤❤  Words: 100.2k Status: Work In Progress Relationship: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov Tags: Historical fantasy AU; Circus; Ice skating; Magic tricks; War; Espionage ❤❤❤❤❤  Review: An original world AU where the countries and time period share similarities to earlier time periods in our world, but have their own names, histories, and conflicts. There is no fantasy magic in this story, just the performance magic tricks that we're used to. This story is very down-to-earth, focusing on a circus troupe that is basically a jack of all trades. Victor, the star of the circus - ice skater, magician, and performer extraordinaire - takes on Yuuri as his apprentice after the two connect during a whimsical evening of dancing and shared secrets. Yuuri is the greenhorn, learning the ropes and building on his strengths. He is particularly talented with ice skating and figuring out the truth behind the magic tricks. The story spends a good amount of words describing the performances themselves, including Yuuri's insights behind the tricks. More than that, IDetestTragedy will link videos in the story that show how the trick is done. I have not come across a fanfic like this before, and it is quite well done. There are several things I really enjoy about this fic: Victor and Yuuri's romantic interactions; watching Yuuri grow more adept at sleight of hand; Yuuri bonding with different members of the circus troupe; the focus on the magic tricks themselves; the realistic lifestyle lived by these characters. This is a great AU for sure!

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Ilsia (@snowbouquet)

Not by Choice

Rating: Mature Words: 91.0k Status: Work In Progress Relationship: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov Tags: Twelve Kingdoms crossover AU; Mythical beings and creatures; Slow burn ❤❤❤❤❤  Summary: When Yuuri was 10, he disappeared from the family onsen on a cold April evening, as if taken away by the unexpected snowstorm. When he was 18, he was found sitting on the blank surface of the ice at Ice Castle, the skating rink nearby. There was no snow, but he was covered in scrapes and completely naked, with his hair long and his eyes vacant. It took him weeks to start reacting to the world outside of his own mind. ❤❤❤❤❤  Review: You don't need to have seen the Twelve Kingdoms to understand this story. Ilsia takes care to clarify the important terms and details within the story or within the notes. I rarely see crossovers with the Twelve Kingdoms, so this was a special find I stumbled across. Once Yuuri regains his memories, about half of each chapter is spent in flashback showing his time within the Twelve Kingdoms, and the other half is spent present day in Japan with Victor trying to coach Yuuri in ice skating. Because of what happens to Yuuri, he is a lot more confident and rational in this story, less likely to panic. So the relationship between Victor and Yuuri develops differently from the series. We're treated to a lot more slice of life moments of the two, attending festivals and acting like tourists. It's pleasant to see these differences and watch these two lovebirds still fall in love. A recent plot development, while not surprising, promises a lot of interesting scenes to come, and I'm really looking forward to it!

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intertwingular (@abrcmhatford)

and this is the wonder (that's keeping the stars apart)

Rating: Teen Words: 21.7k Status: Complete Relationship: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov Tags: Avatar: The Last Airbender setting AU; War and post-war; Politics; Enemies to friends to lovers ❤❤❤❤❤  Summary: Viktor Nikiforov, son, warrior, and now, ambassador finds that peace is harder than war - the war sings through his blood, his bones, his mind; never quiet, never silent, a constant scream in the back of his mind. Katsuki Yuuri, son, outcast, prince, finds that quiet and secrets are hard to keep, when you encounter someone so determined to draw them out. ❤❤❤❤❤  Review: There's no Avatar in this fic. It's basically a post-war fic where Yuuri and Viktor are high ranking individuals from either side of the Fire Nation/Water Tribe war that have to learn to trust one another in order to maintain a tenuous peace. There's some politics involved and a whole lot of tension - Viktor, a warrior uncomfortable with the politics, and Yuuri with a tightly kept secret, both sides skeptical that peace can be kept - but the two eventually reach an understanding and help one another, which gradually grows into love. The tense atmosphere is captured very well throughout the first half of the fic. The first buds of a truce between the two is shakey yet sincere, and the gradual blossoming of love is heartfelt. I'd love to see more from this world, how Viktor and Yuuri try to maintain a relationship while maintaining peace between their two nations.

[theday]

anyways, ill say bye now... i hope ure well rested and have a good day!! (wait, i remember what i wanted to ask!! at least i think this is what i wanted to ask? anywys, do u know what u want to do now that ure finished w school? if u dont mind me asking, of course, i understand if u think its a bit personal!) ok, now im done, have a good day!! take care and stay hydrated!! (and now i really did send u a bunch of asks..)

omg i hope u dont mind but ill be answering the stuff from ur last ask here (the one where i… deleted everything) under cut bc itll be 2x longer now

so first !!!!! how i got into kpop!!! it was thanks to my good pal (@.briwoon) boxy! i follow her on twitter and despite her being a day6 stan twt i had her unmuted anyway bc.. after years of being an anime blog on tumblr and seeing all my anime mutuals slowly converting into kpop blogs one by one i was able to filter the kpop out of my brain?? smth like that since back then i wasnt into kpop and i didnt want to unfollow since im mutuals with most of them :-0 

another backstory - i was one of those people who never saw themselves getting into kpop? and i think the main reason was bc i thought liking kpop would make u seem lame?? due to the influence from people around me?? but as years went by and as my mutuals changed interests it stopped bothering me and that mindset kind of just? faded away bc who am i to call other people’s happiness bad?? but despite being okay with it i never really made the move to get into any groups lmao that was until i got tired of my interest at that time (seiyuu, japanese voice actors) and my interests would always. not last?? idk so maybe thats why i didnt want to get invested but it happened regardless 

anyway usually i wouldnt take notice of her rts but this . this beautiful man with orange hair and minion glasses caught my eye when i was scrolling through my timeline and i was like o worm? oh mu god? hes beautiful? so i slid into her dms and asked her whomst the beautiful man was and she sent me all their mvs after that from congratulations to i smile (the most recent mv at that time, late june) for me to watch :-D now at that time, from what little knowledge i had of kpop.. i understood that groups would be singing and dancing so i was prepared to see some sick moves or smth?? but then. i clicked on miss i smile and my wig flew off? bc… wtf.? they were playing instruments???? and they sounded good ??? so i was like oh my god? a band??????

before day6 i also had (have) a preference for bands and the way their music sounds so i was like?? ready to just. get on board yknow?? i watched how can i say and i saw the lanky noodle wearing glasses and i was like o fuck mu life? i caved and asked boxy for their names and other information and best decision of my life bc.. they really make me happy!!! after that like the day after ? myabe they did a vlive and i was like o shit? what do i do… so i downloaded the vapp and wowie i love it? its my second home…… i watched every vlive they had at that time and i thought that was a lot… (it isnt, compared to mx) and i was just rly content??

(ok i know u asked for kpop and not … day6 or other groups bc im gonna talk abt how i got into mx and astro too bc…… how can i Not.. u can skip this part tho i just wanna ramble abt my loves? ill tell u when u can continue)

that was peak happiness for me at that time.. until… boxy started talking about monsta x in our groupchat (with @.tokayhk) and she would just ramble abt this kihyun fella (who i vaguely knew bc my real life friend likes him and mx and i bought her his pc before along with the guilty clan part 2) so i was like hmm interesting… and honestly? i wasnt going to get into monsta x i really wasnt planning on asking her abt them (since i was scared id lose interest in day6 right after) but then.. she started linking videos and i .. my resolve crumbled down as i heard monsta x yelling and … this beautiful cover (which boxy sent to show us how powerful kihyuns vocals are but i was 2 focused on mister aka minhyukku) and she told us how funny these monsta men are and i was like o h no…………….. eventually one day in late august i asked her to tell me more about these monstas…… aftert that i watched every mxray episode (starting from season 2 bc i dont know 1 comes before 2) and even though i didnt know anyone who was on screen except jooheon i found it really funny and?? it made me laugh so much i love mx?? ya… boxys kind of like my guardian angel?? shes really the reason im living tbh… introducing me to all these lovely people?? thank u miss boxy i love u

now. for the astrosus….. they were a bit different.. because i didnt have boxys help and they were the first group i took interest in solely bymyself so i knew i was in for a wild ride (at first, i couldnt even differentiate brian from sungjin in day6 lmao) after stanning monsta x and day6 i became more?? open to kpop and i started watching unhelpful guides on youtube bc . they were funnie and idk its nice??/ and i stumbled upon the astro one (which wasnt that funny but more helpful than anythng) and i was like. oh worm? the cicada group… bc i watched a short clip of them catching that stupid cicada in their office as it appeared on my tl one day so i clicked on the video ..and after watching that it led me to another video of astro being extra for 6 minutes and those six minutes/????? best six minutes of my life because theyre so fnny and they made me laugh a lot? (combined with the editing from op) so bc they were funnie i decided to look them up and read their profiles/??? i watched their nimdle video and only knew mj bc his tag was the two letters m and j lol but it really made me bust both of my lungs i just?? laughed A Lot 

im not sure how i managed to put name to face so quickly but it mightve been bc after the nimdle videos i watched every ddoca and astro play as well as their vlives available bc..  i just inhale the content at godspeed?? 

for mx and astro i was drawn in by their personalities before their music because they were on more variety shows and had more chances to show dorky they all are which made it way quicker for me to fall for the two groups??? for day6 its a bit sad but the weekly scheduled vlives arent enough for me to tell what kind of people they are (although those r still hilarious) i just wish they would go on more variety shows?? its understandable if they themselves dont want to be on any shows though!!! i love all 3 groups with all my heart :-D 

ok if u skipped u can start from here ill be answering the questions now lmao

FIRSTof all,,,,, youre learning how to drive?? thats so cool >:-0 we’re not allowed to learn until we’re like...?? 18?? or 21 idk but not so Soon :-( and its cute u think abt me (or of what to say) but pleaseth stay safe... i hope ur driving lessons go smoothly until u end theM!!! hopefully youll be able to get ur licence :-D 

aNDD!!! the thought of drinking warm tea when its cold outside.. is so ?? nice to think about hecc u better drink that tEA and enjoy it !!!! stay warm and comfy miss RM ..... and it even snows there????? thats so cool tbh ?? (i love snow but maybe thats bc it doesnt snow here so i dont know the tru evil of snow but like.... its so.... white and fluffy??) i would ask u 2 take pics and show me but alas...... the time is not right :-( do u know when we’re allowed to expose ourselves?? i forgot rip... but its sometime next month right im excited???? since its near my birthday !!!!! 

ok now to answer this ask no i actually have no clue what i want to be after i finish school?? yikEs but last year i (jokingly) said i wanted to be a farmer??? idk if i might actually do that probably not i guess im just freestyling (going with the flow) for now we’ll see where life takes me 

and like i said u can ask me anything !!! im fine with it :-) alsooooo please dont ever feel bad about sending too many asks bc its a lovely thing to wake up to and i just?? get rly happy when i see all the asks in my activity :-D!!  

[austinpanda]

The Spokane Diaries 03.30.2019

A lot has happened to the moving plan. And currently the plan could best be described as a vague, amorphous thing, with no clear destination, and too many tear-stained exclamation points. So I think it wise if I pause for a minute to summarize everything that’s happened up till now, with all its context, the choices we made and events which befell us.

When the plan was first formed, we immediately picked the city of Spokane, Washington to move to. It was just the right size; big enough to have everything we need, small enough not to have traffic. Decent amount of snow each year. Not next to a mountain, but a river with a gorgeous waterfall runs through it, and you can take a cable gondola ride across it. It hosted a world’s fair in the 70s, and some of those constructions remain. It has very friendly pot laws--just go in, show your ID, buy your pot.

Then, cause I’m such a genius, it occured to me that we’d picked Spokane kind of quickly, and mostly because we’d just visited Seattle, and this seemed an affordable Seattle. Perhaps, I wondered aloud, we should take a moment to consider the possibility of non-Spokane, of a different city entirely. Surely we didn’t pick the perfect place on the first attempt without even considering the rest of the lower 48, right? What might happen if we think outside the Spokane box?

A good deal of the filtering and decision-making about possible places for relocation occurs quickly and automatically. We don’t want to live anyplace that doesn’t get a decent amount of snow each year, so the bottom half of the country is therefore immediately discarded. We don’t want to live in a state that doesn’t allow recreational weed. We want natural beauty, or at least some sort of geographical or geological feature that makes it a winner. And it had to be affordable; we want to be able to afford living there and save for our dreams simultaneously.

For a period, Bangor Maine ruled the roost. It’s cold. It’s got New England natural beauty, and touches Canada, America’s hat, that country full of nice people who will never shoot you. Stephen King lives part time in a mansion in Bangor; you can take a picture of yourself standing at its spooky wrought-iron gates. It’s affordability was so-so, but it was on the eastern seaboard, less than a day’s drive to places like Boston, which was incredible! And hey, there’s always a chance you might be getting drywall screws at the hardware store and bump into Stephen King and get a selfie with the best-selling horror author ever! No mountains nearby, but...New England! Think of being there in the fall, when the leaves change color. Find a highway that’s not too heavily travelled and go driving in October and take pictures of the red, orange, and gold trees.

Problems began cropping up. The fact that the affordability was “so-so” didn’t help, and while Maine has legalized pot, political wrangling (and the endeavor’s own inherent complexity) have created a situation where dispensaries are not open for business yet, and I can’t tell when they will be.

And if anyone reading this doesn’t know about my relationship with pot, here it is: I have one, and I don’t particularly like living someplace where it’s banned for foolish reasons, such as:

It’s a gateway drug! (Then so is milk, and watching TV, and breathing air. Post hoc ergo propter hoc, dumbasses. You can’t even make that argument with alcohol, which actually can kill you.)

It robs you of your ambition! (Kinda, in that it softens the effects of certain unpleasant realities which I determine can’t be changed, and makes them easier to live with.)

It’s bad for you! (So are bacon and lethargy. That’s my decision to make, not someone else’s.)

It feeds a system whereby people are enslaved, brutalized, and killed! (No, the fact that it’s illegal feeds it. Make it legal, and no one ever shoots anyone over it again.)

Think of the children! (To quote George Carlin, fuck the children. Or possibly give them weed, too. You know how much less trauma I’d have suffered in high school if they’d had a weed club? I could have been networking in high school, for chrissakes. I might even have gone to a better college.)

Pardon that diversion. So, when last we checked, the husband and I were considering Bangor, Maine to be a possibility, but not necessarily the front-runner. What other places could we consider? Friends made suggestions; we checked them out. An early favorite was Marquette, Michigan.

Ah, lovely Marquette. It’s a picture postcard lakeside beauty. It sits on Lake Superior, and has the largest wooden dome--The Superior Dome--in the (country? known universe?). It was a small town, but it had a university and a pride parade, so it wasn’t that unfortunate squalid reactionary kind of small town. It’s beautiful in the fall, even though the fall only lasts a week. And it has that natural beauty/interesting feature we wanted, Lake Superior. With a lake that big, it’s just as good as living on the ocean, in that you can’t see anything but water all the way to the horizon, but without hurricanes. And Marquette was very affordable, best affordability of all considerations so far.

Couple of problems. Weed was just made legal by vote, but no dispensaries yet, and that could take a couple of years. And because Marquette is such a small town, with a population south of 21,000, we grew worried about our ability to find jobs. And then there was the snow.

Marquette gets about 200 inches of snow per year. One may immediately think, “Okay, well, then at least it’s less than 200 most years, right? Like 150 some years?” This year, Marquette had over 200 inches before the end of February, and they have snow as late as May. Let’s say they don’t get much more this year, and end up with 215 inches of snow per this year. That’s EIGHTEEN FEET of snow. I would sum up the first year of such conditions with, “Wow, cool! That’s a ton of snow!” And years two through infinity would be, “Holy fuck, please make it stop snowing!”

By this point, we had started with Spokane, changed our minds to Bangor, changed our minds again to definitely Marquette, then to maybe Marquette, and then all the wheels came off.

The year 2019 began, and it began poorly: the government was shut down, and because he was deemed essential, Zach was forced to continue working (for the IRS!) for no pay. Then he had a traffic accident--for him, a mountain of trauma, stress, and unwanted interaction--and his car was deemed a total loss. And the title wasn’t in his name. And his parents had to sign and notarize things, and he wasn’t close with them at the time, and they live in Montana.

All this stuff results in many extra hours of Bad Brain, lots of anger, and self-recrimination, and stress, and paperwork and interacting with potentially unpleasant people who may give you the help you need, and may not! Meanwhile, we have to keep working. Have to keep paying the bills. Have to keep making music (him) and trying not to subconsciously steer every moving plan we formulate into the rocky, prickly pear-studded embankment of failure with depressed second-guessing (me).

This brings us to a couple of weeks ago. We still have not been paid for Zach’s car by our insurance company, because of the many steps required to get the car titled in Zach’s name, all of which require signing and notarization, some here, some in Montana. And then, my brain decided to throw this out there: We’ve been to Denver. They have weed. They have mountains. They have snow, and jobs, and they’re closer! It’s under a hundo to fly there, and the flight is just over two hours. Easier to move to; easier to visit. In fact, specifically we chose Boulder. It features more snow and fewer traffic jams than Denver, though we could commute to Denver, if necessary for work.

Then, would you believe, problems. Boulder (and Denver, to a lesser extent) are not very affordable at all. It’s just right in every other aspect, but in price, it’s ungood. We’d have to spend maybe $100 less per month on rent there than here in Austin. In Marquette, with a little luck, we could spend $500 less. Think what we could do to Zach’s student loan bills with that shit! Think of the medical care and dentistry and car repairs and utility bills we could afford with that! None of that happens if we choose Boulder. We get mountains, but we pay dearly for them.

Now, to step back a smidge, consider this: I know that there will be problems with any choice we make. We’re not going to make a choice that results in us driving a U-Haul from our microscopic apartment in Austin to a mansion in Shangri-La. And I figure there’s pretty much one thing that’ll soften this transition: money. How much sounds like enough? Here’s how I tend to think of it: I’m about to do something that will involve me hanging from a rope tied to a loose branch over a thousand-foot chasm, and the only thing I’ll be able to influence is how good a rope it’s going to be. How much am I willing to pay to make sure the rope won’t fail? What if a $100 rope isn’t nearly as good as a $1,000 rope? What if the best rope you can get costs $10,000. Are you willing to spend less than that, if there’s even a chance you could save it up? ($10,000 is what we’re aiming for, by the way.) 

Something tells me there’s an easier solution to this conundrum, but it may be prohibitively difficult to find. Like...the perfect mate exists, but unfortunately, he/she/whoever lives in Turkmenistan and there’s absolutely ZERO chance that you’ll ever be within a thousand miles of ‘em, literally or figuratively. But! There’s always the chance that someone reading this may think, “Well, the solution is obvious; you just need to ignore concern X and move to city Y, and you’re kind of a dumbass for not figuring that out yourself.” The choices, then, are to ignore our concerns about weather, jobs, weed, ease to relocate to, distance from Austin, etc. and just move to Boulder, Colorado, Marquette, Michigan, Bangor, Maine, Spokane, Washington, Rapid City, South Dakota, Ashgabat, Turkmenistan (its capital!), or someplace else. Bam. Book it. Done.

This is a lot of the reason why I’ve been depressed recently: because I had a big, fat, beautiful GOAL for a while, and it got turned into a big, distressing, confusion. The best idea we’ve had so far to decide how to approach it? We’re going to save up and visit Boulder. Then we’re going to save up and visit Spokane or Marquette or Bangor. We’ll go to the places. We’ll observe our reactions. We’ll try to smart-decide instead of dumb-decide. We’ll be open to suggestions.

Marquette, Michigan

[sugabeans]

wanted to do the other unusual asks questions bc i had time 

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 

is your room messy or clean?

what color are your eyes?

light brown

do you like your name? why?

what is your relationship status?

single single forever 

describe your personality in 3 words or less

quiet, loud, happy 

what color hair do you have?

dark brown 

what kind of car do you drive? color?

it’s my parents.. a silver corolla 

where do you shop?

anywhere where there is a sale! 

i always shop on aliexpress lol 

for clothing, a lot of my clothes comes from walmart, garage, dynamite, f21, bluenotes, h&m, (all from the sale section hehe) 

how would you describe your style?

skinny jeans when it’s cool outside, flowy shorts when it’s warm 

both plus a tshirt 

and sneakers or boots as footwear bc i hate feet with no socks 

favorite social media account

what size bed do you have?

queen size!

any siblings?

1 sister 

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

japan 

why? because it seems like a nice place to be ;u; 

favorite snapchat filter?

i like the standard flower crown one - the one that lightens your face and adds a crown, and does nothing more 

favorite makeup brand(s)

idk i don’t wear makeup 

how many times a week do you shower?

once every day so 7 times? 

favourite tv show?

haikyuu 

shoe size?

generally an 8 

how tall are you?

sandals or sneakers?

SNEAKERS ALWAYS HO MAN 

do you go to the gym?

describe your dream date

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

a lot.. i’m not going to count but it’s def over $100 in cash 

what color socks are you wearing?

i’m actually not wearing socks rn bc i showered recently 

but it’s always plain black 

how many pillows do you sleep with?

do you have a job? what do you do?

i’m currently a research assistant and we’re doing things with phonetics and the perception of sounds and such - though i won’t have this job in september bc it’s a summer job 

how many friends do you have?

idk what are friends 

whats the worst thing you have ever done?

cheated on a test? 

flicked a booger into my classmates hair (when i was 8) 

scribbed marker on mommy’s white couch? 

sacked a boy in grade 6 by whacking his balls with a broom?

turned down a boy and RAN AWAY many times 

whats your favourite candle scent?

i don’t like scents but something fruity like strawberry or cherry?

3 favourite boy names

kevin haha

idk any others that i really like? i mean, if i hear a nice name i’ll probs be like “ah that’s a pretty name” but i can’t think of any off the top of my head that i particularly like 

3 favourite girl names

can’t really answer their either 

favourite actor?

don’t have one 

favourite actress?

also don’t have one 

who is your celebrity crush?

kevin woo 

favourite movie?

i still really like mulan 

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?

i do not read a lot and my fave series is dengeki daisy 

money or brains?

brains 

brains will bring you the moneys 

do you have a nickname? what is it?

karinabeans is my self-proclaimed nickname lol 

gabby calls me rainbow 

how many times have you been to the hospital?

never 

i just go to the doctor or walk-in clinic

top 10 favourite songs

don’t make me do this LOL 

do you take any medications daily?

no 

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

combination

my eyes and lips and around both areas + forehead are dry af

but under my lips and near my nose are SO OILY CRIES 

what is your biggest fear?

how many kids do you want?

2 

but i also don’t want kids 

whats your go to hair style?

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

i think it’s a decent size - probably bigger than most people 

who is your role model?

what was the last compliment you received?

can’t remember honestly 

what was the last text you sent?

it was to my student’s mom saying i stopped by but no one was home so i left 

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

can’t remember but i stopped believing pretty late 

daddy showed me this website that showed you where santa was currently and i 100% believed it was real 

what is your dream car?

one that drives 

tbh i want one of those little ones lol the environment friendly ones 

bc it’s just gonna be me driving it 

bc i’m going to die alone 

opinion on smoking?

I HATE 

it’s disgusting 

if you smoke, i’ll like you less as a person 

if i smell it on you - then i have a bad opinion of you 

do you go to college?

no i go to university

i’m in my 4th year  

what is your dream job?

i want to be a speech language pathologist 

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

suburbs 

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

yes, who doesn’t? 

i reuse the containers 

do you have freckles?

no 

do you smile for pictures?

always 

how many pictures do you have on your phone?

a hecka lot 

have you ever peed in the woods?

maybe i have? i’ve been camping a number of times and maybe i did?

do you still watch cartoons?

hell yeah teen titans is life 

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

mcdonalds 

Favorite dipping sauce?

sweet and sour boi 

what do you wear to bed?

a loose tshirt and shorts 

or if it’s cold out, sweatpants and a sweater 

have you ever won a spelling bee?

no pfft i can’t spell for shit 

what are your hobbies?

can you draw?

no but i wish i could 

do you play an instrument?

no but i used to play piano and flute 

and violin and guitar but i wasn’t very good at those 

what was the last concert you saw?

troye sivan? 

tea or coffee?

tea 

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

lol neither i’m not american 

tim hortons for life 

do you want to get married?

yes but no 

i like the idea of marriage and living with someone i love for the rest of my life 

but like, getting married requires someone to be married to 

and it also requires you to spend a lot of money to get married (if you have a ceremony and shit) 

too much work 

what is your crush’s first and last initial?

DR 

are you going to change your last name when you get married?

no i’m keeping my last name forever

it will live and die with me bc i don’t often see my last name anywhere

what color looks best on you?

red, like most people 

do you miss anyone right now?

yeah i miss my crush lol 

it’s silly but i want to see him 

i’m sure he doesn’t care to see me though 

do you sleep with your door open or closed?

closed 

do you believe in ghosts?

yes

what is your biggest pet peeve?

last person you called`

again my tutor’s mother LOL 

favourite ice cream flavor?

red bean or some typa chocolate rocky road or idk but chocolate definitely 

regular oreos or golden oreos?

regular

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

chocolate 

what shirt are you wearing?

a univeristy of toronto tshirt i won in my first year 

what is your phone background?

suga smiling ^^ 

are you outgoing or shy?

very shy 

do you like it when people play with your hair?

I LOVE IT 

but no one plays with my hair

it’s so sad 

do you like your neighbors?

i guess? there are some who are too loud though and smoke and ugh 

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

i wash it in the shower at night

have you ever been high?

no 

have you ever been drunk?

i don’t think so 

last thing you ate?

i drank tea 

that’s not food lol uh i ate snow pea leaves 

favourite lyrics right now

can’t think of one 

summer or winter?

winter bc cold 

day or night?

day! look at the sunshine~

dark, milk, or white chocolate?

i like dark, i also like milk, i dislike white 

favourite month?

december! 

what is your zodiac sign

cancer

who was the last person you cried in front of?

i only cry by myself 

[ultears]

Could you tell how you make those wonderful gif edits, and what effects and apps you usually use? I just love them!!! If possible can u make a tutorial please? Thanks in advance ❤❤

First of all, thank you so much!! That means a lot because I put lots of effort into making them. :) Second of all, you didn’t actually precise what gifset you’ve seen and therefore what effects you want me to explain, but I’m going to guess it’s this one because it has like, 500 different things going on :’) (if not, feel free to send me another ask specifying which gifset, although basically, any effect I’ve ever used is in this one, so it’ll be explained) 

I only use Photoshop CS6 for all of my gifsets (I don’t use anything to make the caps/frames because I feel like it’s easier to just make them in CS6) and I use a Macbook Pro if that does anything? Idk, just for the screenshots I guess haha

For these tutorials, I’m going to assume you have basic GIF-making knowledge but if you need a tutorial for that too, just send me an ask and I’ll teach you how I do it (because everyone does it slightly differently)

Disclaimer: I’m in no way an expert, most of the things I know about GIFs are thanks to the tutorials of people before me and lots of trial and error. Also, I suck at explaining things. 

I’m gonna put this under a cut or else it’s gonna take so much space oml

GRADIENTED GIFS

So these gifs are probably the easiest to make out of all of the ones in this set. I’ll be using the hand for the example because it was slightly harder to get there (you’ll see why shortly)

So you start by making your basic gif: (I edit all my gifs at 540px but these are saved at 268px for Tumblr dimensions)

Because this is a colour-matching gifset and not a vibrancy, I skip my step of basic colouring (which usually includes lots of curves, vibrancy, and selective colour, and you can see that the most in my lyrical fairy tail gifsets) Instead, I’m going straight for the gradient layers. I start off with a full black and white to get the colour contrasts, and then I put the gradient of the colours I want:

Now for this gifset, I had a basic self-made psd (if you will) that I copied on every gif to get the same colour, so I’ll do that now (it’s made up of curves, vibrancy, brightness/contrast and exposure layers)

Now, I didn’t think there was enough of a contrast between Yuuri’s hand and the background, so I added a curves, brightness/contrast and levels layer BEFORE the gradient ones so that it would affect the entire colour schemes to get this:

And there you go, that’s the gif! The one with the skates didn’t use that last step because I liked the contrast between the skates and the background already without additional layers, so that’s why it was easier. I also added snow on it like I did with all other gifs in the set, so I’ll do a separate tutorial in here for that.

TYPOGRAPHY

To be honest, I wouldn’t really be able to explain these very well considering it was my first time using them, so here are the links to the tutorials I followed. It was lots of trial and error until I got the method down, but I was happy with the end result, so I’d recommend them.

Typing the name: [x] (I actually did this one without a tutorial but this one resembles what I did, I was just too lazy to put the cursor bar lol) 

Writing “love”: [x]

So, if you followed the tutorial the same way I did, you’re going to get something like this:

Similarly to the hand, I copied the gradient I wanted (I didn’t need to put the black and white one since those are already the base colours): 

However, because I wanted the opposite colours, I clicked the little “reverse” button in the properties > gradient map to get this:

From there, I added the same PSD as earlier to reach the colour scheme:

And there you go, that’s it for the text ones! Just missing the snow. I know this makes it look simple but that’s because I didn’t make the tutorial myself for the hardest part, lol. (The handwriting one took me about an hour, so don’t despair if it takes lots of time because it’s definitely a hard effect to get a handle of)

AI / GLASSES

Alrighty! Well, these two are the object ones, and probably would’ve been considered the easiest ones if I didn’t have to deal with finding the exact image I was mentally picturing for the glasses, whoops. 

So the “Love” character comes from episode 5 when Yuuri presents his theme. I tried taking the frames where the sign doesn’t move. So, we start off with that basic gif:

Over these frames, I placed a ‘colour fill’ layer that matches the colour of the board on which Yuuri wrote, which actually gives us a completely opaque colour over everything. 

After that, I added a layer mask so we could see only the writing of the character through the fill layer, hiding everything else in the frame: 

This doesn’t look like a gif because I covered up everything that moves, but it is one! You’ll only see movement later when I add the snow, which is the only thing that moves in both this gif and the glasses one. Now, like the other gifs, I added the gradient (also reversed like the writing to get the proper colours) and the psd to make it darker like the others as well, and you get to this:

And there you go! That’s how I made the Ai gif. You can also do it like I’m about to do the glasses, with a singular screencap, turned into multiple frames.

So for the glasses, I searched online for an image that I thought resembled Yuuri’s glasses and found these, which I was satisfied with: [x]

To get to the shape I wanted, I messed around with the image size and the canvas size until I got them approximatively the size I wanted them in my usual 540x304 canvas size, like this:

Now that I had my image, I converted it to a frame timeline like with most of my gifs, and copied the image into multiple frames so I had this:

Now, for all intents and purposes, although nothing is moving (yet), this is a gif because it has the multiple frames going on a loop. Like with all of the other gifs I’ve made, I put the gradient layers (this one had a black and white one because there’s blue in this one as well) and the PSD:

And that’s it! Again, just missing the snow to make it look like a moving gif. I’m guessing that you can see my pattern at this point, haha! Now I’m going to screw it over with the final two gifs, that are a little different. Whoops. 

CHARACTER CUT-OUT GIFS

Welcome, friends, to the most time-consuming form of gif I have ever made. Luckily, only the cutting out of the character takes time, the rest is pretty straightforward from what I’ve done in the past gifs, and you can reuse the cut-out characters for any future gifsets as well (I used these cutouts from a previous gifset I made, this one here) 

I learned how to do these cutout gifs (well I had a general idea on how to do it but her explanations make it so much clearer) thanks to bae’s @katsuukis ‘s tutorial here, so you should probably just follow her tutorial ‘cause mine’s a mess. :’) 

You start off with your basic gif. (the fewer the frames, the less you’ll want to jump off a bridge while doing it: this example is 11 frames, but the other gif is 58 frames, and let me tell you, it was unpleasant) I try keeping it the original size of the frames (in my case, 1280x720px) so it’s easier to edit the masks to remove the backgrounds. (but I will be saving them at 268px later on) 

I chose the frames for this one so that it looks like an eternal loop, but you can do whatever you want! 

Alright, now for the masking. You’re going to select both the frame in the timeline and its equivalent layer. Using the ‘quick selection tool’, you’re going to select around Yuuri until you have the whole background, like this:

And you’re going to click ‘refine edge’ (in the top bar) so it looks like this. I use the same settings as Alice recommends in her tutorial, and it seems to do the trick. And then you click ‘OK’:

Then, you’re going to right click, choose ‘select inverse’, and you’re going to click the little rectangle with a circle in the middle of it at the bottom right under the layers (if you hover over it, it says ‘Add layer mask’) 

And it should give you something like this:

Because this is a tutorial, I did this a little sloppily, but the more detailed you get with the mask, the better, so take as much as you need to get it how you want. And, you’re going to redo this for every frame. (this is why it’s better to have 11 frames than 58, lol) Now that all the masking is done, I resize the gif to its usual 540px width. In the end, it should give you something like this: 

The edges for this gif seem a little rough but imo they look better when you have a background, which is what we’re going to do next. 

In the layers section, under all the images of Yuuri, you’re going to place a colour fill layer, like this:

This colour matches the purple end of the gradient I’ve been using. The shades are completely the same. (#9c9fb7) And from there, you’re pretty much set. You don’t need to put a gradient on this one, but you do have to put the PSD, so:

Note: the psd I’ve been using for all of these gifs was based from these gifs, meaning I adjusted all the colours to get what I wanted from the gifs containing Yuuri’s face in them. So logically, these are the first gifs I made for the set. But yeah, that’s it! Just missing the snow, once again. 

SNOW

So, on all of the gifs, you can see there’s a light snowfall going on. Probably to no one’s surprise, I also learned this trick from @katsuukis tutorial here, and really it’s pretty simple, although I changed it a little because I hate using smart filters, lmao. 

We’ll use the glasses for the example because it’s the only gif in here that started out not as some frames from the show or an animated text, but literally just an image copied into multiple frames (you’ll see why having the multiple frames was necessary now as opposed to just keeping the one frame) 

So you start off with this:

You’re going to open your chosen file for snow in Photoshop. I found that the one Alice uses is a little too thin in snow (considering I’m incorporating the snow into the gradient instead of leaving it white on top) so I found a very similar gif that just has more snowflakes (or maybe I’m crazy) (I’m not 100% sure if it’s this one because I didn’t save its origins but here:)  [x] :

So you open the gif up in Photoshop, select as many frames of it as you need (I made the glasses gif to be 24 frames, so that’s how many frames I’m taking from the snow) and copy them:

Go over to your main gif (the glasses in this case), select all the frames and click ‘paste frames…’:  

And make sure that you select ‘Paste over selection’ then click ‘OK’:

It should look something like this, which is completely normal:

In the Layers section, create a new group, and place all of the snow layers in there. (Rename the group ‘snow’ if you want) Move the newly created group between the black/white gradient and the gradient of your choice (mine is the purple/off-white one):

Finally, when selecting all of the frames in the timeline and the group that contains the snow, change its mode from ‘Pass through’ to ‘Screen’

And there you go! That’s how you add the snow (here it is in 540px so you can properly see the effect). 

And that’s actually all the effects I used to make that gifset. It was way more than I thought it was, but explaining them all made me realise how much I learned, haha! If I didn’t go into enough detail for some of these, just shoot me another ask and I’ll try to explain more than I did here. 

[krassetorte]

Thanks for tagging me, @dr-jillianholtzmann

A - age: 18 B - biggest fear: Rats scare the shit outta me C - current time: 10:32 pm D - drink last had: Water E - every day starts with: Checking out whether there are any new Snapchat filters. I freaking love them haha F - favorite song: I don’t really have one. I have lots of songs that I like very much though. G - ghosts: I guess. But they can be explained with science. H - hometown: A small town in the East of Germany :) I - in love with: Cats. All the cats. J - jealous of: people that make accurate cosplays. Teach me the miracle, please! K - kissed anyone lately: I got a New Year’s kiss from one of my best friends. But besides that, unfortunately not. L - last time you cried: When the Hamilton YouTube channel released a video of the cast singing “One Last Time” in the White House for Obama and literally everyone else was bawling in it and I started too lmao M - middle name: Don’t have one N - number of siblings: one younger brother who is three years younger than me O - one wish: I have two wishes for my life: 1. work at buzzfeed and 2. appear on Drunk History P - person you last called/texted: My best friend Q - question you’re always asked: Would are you going to do after school? R - reasons to smile: Snow, Skiing, being out with the squad, seeing cats on the streets, hot chocolate, food etc. S - song last sang: Burn from Hamilton T - time you woke up: 9:00 am because my teachers was ill today U - underwear colour: light blue V - vacation destination: Amsterdam, New York, Scotland, New Zealand, Norway… I just love to explore new places (: W - worst habit: I bite my nails :( X - x-rays you’ve had: Probably two or three. My wrist was broken when I was like 7 and during the first x-ray they couldn’t find out so I was running around  with a broken wrist for a week before they did it again and then finally figured out xd Y - your favorite food: Sushi and Ice Cream Z - zodiac sign: Leo but I really don’t about it haha

Tagging @hab-doch-nur-hrnshn-gesagt @fabrikfehler @ghost–tits @spooky-holtz @jemalil @holtzmanntrash @dancingwithholtzmann