#i got lazy and unmotivated

[rosie-autz]

hands you Jibanyan and Whisper as followers

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then leaves to finish the crossover au project

[lizardho]

Before I knew I was bisexual I was just insanely dramatic and weird around guys I liked. I had a crush on this guy in my ward - he was older than me, he played bagpipes and had a cheerful dog and an old Volkswagen bus that he worked on all the time. He also had nice scruff and unnaturally attractive hands and a good sense of humor, so I was like FULLY smitten.

I talked about him a lot and about how he was just so dang COOL, dang it, because he was so frickin’ cool. And I really liked him. I thought he was funny and smart and interesting and cool and fascinating and a bunch of other weird feelings I barely had the attention span to think about (I think my ADHD may have prevented me from coming out for a while tbh).

One day, I’m like 14-15, his dad is called to be my Sunday School teacher. His dad is this ex-military hardass with a chip on his shoulder for absolutely no reason and unattainable standards for his children. He spent most of Sunday School talking shit about his eldest boy and how he was rebellious and didn’t listen to him and how that was going to make him a bad adult and a bad son forever. How his son was too lazy and unmotivated to be successful because he didn’t listen to his advice on how to read the scriptures. He complained about how our generation was too weak to do things right and that our generation would surely be the one that brought the world’s downfall because of our laziness and sin.

And like, first of all, that guy can already go fuck himself for that. To clarify, that’s already stupid. BUT. He was talking about the man I had uncomfortable dreams about at least once a month. I couldn’t stand it. I’d get so mad I’d go home shaking sometimes because how fucking DARE he insult his hardworking stunning son by calling him lazy? For not reading the Bible the way his dad wants? When he’s already spending his time learning bagpipes? And fixing cars? And being cool? And cute? Who the fuck even cares if he uses the footnotes in the Book of Mormon? Who gives a rotten rat’s ass if he doesn’t use the scripture study manual his dad uses? He’s so cool he doesn’t even need it? So fuck off?

And eventually I got fucking Sick Of It and decided to mutiny. And by mutiny, I mean skip class. I’d just not go. And after a bit, adults started noticing and bugging me about it. At first, this was put off by small talk and excuses, but as my absence from Sunday School became more well-known, my excuses began to be rejected.

“Oh, Lizard, why aren’t you in class?” Uhm idk because my Sunday School teacher is mean to his kid and that makes me so mad wtf do you want from me? 🫠🤔

“Where’s your class, I’ll go with you!” Oh no ty I’d rather peel my own eyes than have my taste in men critiqued tyty 🩷

“Lizard, you should go to class, I’m sure they miss you!” And I miss the innocent days where my stomach didn’t hurt when a cool boy I knew was being belittled but unfortunately for us both those days are LONG gone and all that’s left is a budding psychosexual clusterfuck that will render me almost fully incapable of functioning for the better part of a decade so Bye Bye, sister Smith 🙂‍↕️

It had gotten to the point that ward leadership was involved. I was being approached by members of the Young Men’s presidency and the Bishopric to try and make me to back to class. They were telling me God had told them to find me and instruct me on my rebelliousness. This is where I implemented my secret weapon - women. Mormons are weird as hell about a lot of things, but especially about women. And I was GREAT with women. So to combat the leadership’s attention, I started helping women.

Our ward had a lot of new moms with babies who were, as babies tend to be, fussy. But for Mormon women the church is often their only social outlet, so they try to power through as long as they can even if it means enduring the exhausting ordeal of taking care of a fussy baby at church.

For what it’s worth, I have a lot of sway with babies. I got baby street cred. Me and babies have a rapport. I have always known this. I have always loved this. And in this crucial gay time in my faggot life my baby mind powers came in clutch - Every time I saw a member of the bishopric getting close, or a young men’s leader giving me side-eye, I’d start walking slowly towards class, passing by relief society. I’d wait until a mom’s baby had gotten too fussy and needed to leave the room, and I’d swoop in like a knight. “Oh, don’t you worry sister, I’ll bounce him a bit. You go back and hang out with your friends in class. You deserve a break.”

If it was a diaper change or something they’d tell me no. But if it was just some good old-fashioned baby fusses, I mean, they’d be moved almost to tears. They just got their social time back AND a free babysitter who is renowned as the Baby Whisperer. And because I was holding a baby as a favor for someone else, I of course could not reasonably be bothered to return to class.

So just like that, I was out of everyone’s sights. This went on for about a month before the straw that broke the camel’s back, which was that without my class participation the classes were quiet and awkward. I’d often take the brunt of Sunday school lectures by answering questions impulsively and over explaining myself enough that the clock could run out without anyone needing to do or say much. My absence meant everyone else was getting hit with the full unpleasantness of this guy’s bullshit. And so slowly, one-by-one, I had a group of about 8 kids on baby-holding duty. These new moms were so overjoyed, they and their husbands were both so actively in our corner that now chastising us was untenable. Now we had bargaining power. So the Bishopric approached us, confused beyond confused and uncomfortable beyond uncomfortable, and said,

“What’s it gonna take to get you back to class?”

The POWER I possessed in that moment was addictive. By being kind to the women of the ward and ignoring the Mormon de facto Rule of Law of following rules en-masse so the rule breakers feel left out, there were now so many people breaking ranks that we had effectively enacted a church boy labor strike. And they crumbled so fast it was almost like we had swayed God himself to our cause.

“I want brother assholedad gone. He sucks at teaching.”

I didn’t even have to say it. One of my rebels said it for me. I just nodded sagely and said “Yes, his class is not edifying. It’s better to not go and hold babies.”

And just like that, with a snap of my limp-wristed, Christ-wounding, bottom-brained fingers my faggot will was enacted. God’s revelation that brother shitdad was his chosen Sunday school teacher flipped on a dime. Suddenly brother shitdad was asked to be an usher and the fun dad of another one of my crushes was called in to teach us. I still stayed to hold babies a lot, but the rest of the class returned and all was well again.

Although I didn’t recognize it then, I think that was a formative moment for me in a lot of ways. I learned that being really persistently annoying will get me what I want from authority eventually. I learned that God’s will can be swayed by going in strike. I learned that ignoring men’s made up authority forces them to level with you as a person. I learned that caring for women, especially vulnerable women, can make a whole world happier. I learned that letting women rest can help them feel more love for the things that matter in their life. I learned that social bonds make everyone stronger and happier. And I learned that loving others in a gay way can change the world.

Be gayer. Read Terry Pratchett. I love y’all 💕

[katamarigender]

Guys what if itss not real what if ive been pretending the whole time.

[iloveyoubecauseyouarelove]

Hearing my ma go off about betrayed trust like 💀

It's not that deep not everything some does or doesnt do that you Dont like is Not a dig at you

Like my sibling didnt mention they gave 20 dollars to a friend for a game. I dont think it's unreasonable for my ma to have want to know but also it's not unreasonable for my sibling to have just not said. My sibling has hundreds of dollars, im sure 20 seems inconsequential. Should they have lied and said 5 dollars when asked? No, especially not with how hypocritical my ma is about even the "smallest of lies". But should my ma have feelings of betrayal at not being told to begin with? Also no, my ma just likes to think every behavior she doesnt like is an intentional personal attack

Like 1 time i was punished and had to leave my smartphone at home and take a backup phone to school. Keyword: school. I have no reason to be on the phone that has no apps no web right? And my ma doesnt always text me during school. She also told me i dont need to keep the phone On. So i left it off the whole day except for when i check my phone at lunch, around the time she texts me yeah? I dont get any texts so i turn the phone back off until after school. Turns out my ma texted me a Little bit after i turned off the phone. But she starts berating me about not texting her as a way to get back at her for punishing me and taking away my phone. I was just so ??? Damn confused. I explained to her that i turned my phone on at lunch and then turned back off after and she didnt care? And then she was like why did you have the phone off anyways? I told her she said to leave it off. She said she meant the ringer and i didnt know how to do that but also she said i could turn the phone off. She didnt care, she thought she disproved me and i was just trying to make excuses for trying to get back at her. I Might have told her i was going to answer during class and i dont have time during passing cause my classes were so far. She still didnt care. She put it in her mind i was trying to punish her for punishing me and so that's it. I wouldnt be able to change her mind

[un-fwuit-un-fwog]

Falling Behind

Synopsis: The Prefect has ADHD and was medicated for it back in their old world, but when they go to Crowley for help getting a diagnosis here, he brushes them off. They proceed to struggle until finally breaking down. (+ Crewel basically steps up as a father figure)

TW: Pretty descriptive with the negative effects of The Prefect's ADHD, Talk of medication, The Prefect cries, Crowley says the usual things people who deny/downplay ADHD say, Crewel has the "Help me help you talk" with The Prefect, The Prefect cries and is overall just GOING THROUGH IT

NOTE: I went off of my experience as a person diagnosed with ADHD and medicated for it. My experience with it won't apply to everyone else with it, but rest assured this won't be a fic that portrays ADHD like a silly, goofy little quirk. (This is a pretty self-indulgent fic, tbh)

Many people who are diagnosed with ADHD and medicated accordingly have the thought cross their minds every once in a while of "Do I really need the medicine?" When you're on ADHD medication for long enough, you forget what it's like to not function at the level you do when taking it. The memories of the difficulty focusing can slip away with time and leave you doubting. You were no exception.

Key word is were.

When you got thrown into Twisted Wonderland you learned pretty quickly that the medicine in fact does help and that you in fact do need it.

But how would you even go about getting it here? You'd need a diagnosis and for that you'd need a psychiatrist and for that you'd need money (and an official identity which you did not have as an alien to this world).

You tried bringing it up to Crowley, but he brushed it off. He said the same lines you had heard 100 times before, many of which you found yourself thinking from time to time: "You just need to make yourself work. You're unmotivated." and, while he didn't say it out loud, you could clearly tell that what he was really saying was that you were lazy.

You suppose you should have expected as much. No headmage that gave two hoots about mental health would be running a school that has no student counselor.

After that interaction you had resigned yourself to the fact that you'd have to come to terms with being a student and doing schoolwork with no relief to your condition.

You tried your best, you really did. You sat at your desk for hours on end as you tried to finish a simple homework sheet, but hours passed with virtually no progress being made. You couldn't force yourself to focus. When you did your body protested. Your brain refused to allow a single proper thought to form and your eyes wouldn't focus. If you forced the issue further, it only got worse. Your brain and eyes felt somehow heavier than usual and sometimes you swore they were slowly liquifying to a goo in your skull.

You didn't bring it up to your friends. You felt weird talking about it with them. One too many times being told you were faking or doing it for attention you suppose.

Your grades began to slip. Deadlines popped up when you could have sworn you had more time. You made little mistakes you chastised yourself for. You knew the material. You knew you knew the material.

. . .so why were you messing up.

Assignments piled up and slipped through the cracks. It's not like your teachers could notice how out of character this was for you. They didn't know how well you typically functioned when medicated, and it's not like you told them about the disorder in the first place.

Each night you held back tears of frustration as you tried desperately to get any work done. You weren't one to cry easily. In fact, you hadn't cried since you got to Twisted Wonderland, and even before that it had been a while since you last allowed tears to drip from your eyes.

But everyone has a breaking point.

You had gotten so far behind on your assignments that it was decided you needed more than to simply stay in the classroom to work during lunch and you were put in after school tutoring (although it felt more like detention).

The first few weeks you managed to keep it together. You taped over the holes that chipped away into your composure and did your best to hold down the storm of emotions that thrashed violently inside of you.

Another day of after school tutoring came around. By now not even Grim was having to stay for these sessions. There were other students that were in them, but they were in a separate classroom. You knew what was happening even if nobody outright said it.

You sat in Crewel's empty classroom for the second week in a row. The clock on the wall ticked impossibly loud. Every sound around you was amplified tenfold and you could feel it wearing on you. Your arms shook in a sick combination of frustration and exhaustion as you tried in vain to get one question done.

You could feel the ugly jaws of your pent-up emotions gnashing away at your already tattered walls of composure.

Crewel sighed as you once again failed to answer the question: "Look, I really do want to help you, but in order for that to happen I need you to cooperate and listen to me. Right now, it feels like you aren't doing that."

You had had this conversation with him before; with all your teachers for that matter. You used to it. YOU WERE USED TO IT.

You chanted the phrase in your head over and over again.

"What do you not understand."

He didn't say it in a malicious way. He sounded genuine, just. . .exhausted.

He didn't know. He wasn't aware of the storm in your stomach slowly making its way to your eyes. He didn't know.

You don't blame him, but when he said those words you finally broke.

It wasn't anything grand or dramatic like you see in movies. A small catch of your breath in a short-lived attempt to hold it together and then tears. You choked on your sobs as you tried to quell them. The only thing worse than crying is crying in front of people.

Your knees curled up onto the bench, up to your chest, and you hugged them: trying to hide your face and muffle your sobs.

It was no use. Crewel already saw the tears.

He was momentarily stunned at how suddenly you seemed to break down and could only watch as your whole body shook with the sobs you were trying so desperately to hold in.

When he finally snapped out of it he was still unsure of what to do, so he did the only thing he could.

You felt his large, fluffy coat be draped over your shoulders before he somewhat awkwardly sat a comfortable distance away from you as he waited for you to calm down.

When your sobs finally quieted to small whimpers he apologized for making you cry.

You explained it wasn't his fault and, after a bit of silence, you explained to him what was wrong.

He sat with you and listened patiently as you told him about your ADHD, the trouble you'd been having since you got here, and finally recounted your interaction with Crowley.

He led you to the infirmary not far from his office, telling you he'd be back soon and to rest for the time being.

Luckily for Crewel, the headmage's office was just about as far away from the infirmary as it could be.

He could scream as loud as he wanted without disturbing you.

By the time he returned to the infirmary it was late. He was about to apologize for leaving you there so long but stopped himself.

There on the bed was your exhausted form curled up in his coat and sleeping peacefully.

The next day he asked you a few more questions, and the day after that, he accompanied you to the doctor's office. (you didn't bother asking how he managed to get you registered as an actual person)

You went through suspiciously less steps than you had back in your old world to get the diagnosis, but you just chalked it up to the fact that it was clear by your appearance that you had been going through it.

You got your medicine the same day. Wait. . .did Crewel just tell the pharmacist he was picking it up for his child?

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[sweetlyvibe]

✎ . . . their reaction to you DEFENDING THEM .ᐟ.ᐟ

- 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭. 𝖪𝖾𝗇𝗆𝖺 𝖪𝗈𝗓𝗎𝗆𝖾 ⋆ 𝖲𝗎𝗇𝖺 𝖱𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖺𝗋𝗈𝗎 ⋆ 𝖪𝖺𝗀𝖾𝗒𝖺𝗆𝖺 𝖳𝗈𝖻𝗂𝗈 ⋆ 𝖠𝗄𝖺𝖺𝗌𝗁𝗂 𝖪𝖾𝗂𝗃𝗂 ⋆ 𝖭𝗂𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗈𝗒𝖺 𝗒𝗎𝗎

Rintarou stood quietly off to the side, his usual unimpressed expression fixed in place as someone started throwing accusations his way—something about being lazy or unmotivated. You, however, weren’t having any of it.

“Excuse me, but do you even know what you’re talking about?” you interrupted, stepping in front of Rintarou. “He works harder than anyone else, and just because he doesn’t broadcast it like some people doesn’t mean you get to judge him.”

Rintarou’s eyes widened slightly, caught off guard by your sudden defense. The tiniest smirk tugged at his lips as he watched you go off on his behalf. When the other person finally backed down and walked away, you turned to him, your face still flushed with indignation.

“You didn’t have to do that,” he said, his voice soft and calm, but his gaze held an uncharacteristic warmth.

“Yes, I did,” you shot back. “They were being unfair.”

his smirk deepened, his hand ruffling your hair. “Thanks, Y/n. You’re kind of scary when you’re mad, but… I like it.”

Keiji was trying to remain polite, as always, but the person arguing with him clearly wasn’t interested in reason. They kept cutting him off, questioning his decisions, and Keiji‘s calm demeanor was starting to falter.

That’s when you stepped in. “Hold on, why don’t you let him finish before jumping to conclusions?” you said firmly, crossing your arms. “Akaashi knows exactly what he’s doing, and if you actually listened to him, you’d realize that.”

The person stammered, clearly taken aback by your sharp tone, before awkwardly excusing themselves. Keiji blinked at you, his mouth slightly open in surprise.

“You didn’t have to do that, Y/n,” he said after a moment, his voice soft.

You shrugged, your cheeks a little pink. “I couldn’t just stand there and let them talk to you like that.”

A small smile appeared on his lips as he adjusted his glasses. “Thank you,” he murmured, his eyes meeting yours with quiet admiration. “You didn’t just defend me—you reminded me why I’m lucky to have you around.”

Kenma hated arguments, especially when he was the target. He’d much rather let the other person talk themselves out than get involved, but this time, they were relentless, criticizing his supposed lack of “effort” on the team.

You, however, weren’t about to let that slide. “Oh, come on,” you said, stepping forward with a sharp glare. “Do you even know Kenma? He works harder than anyone else. Just because he’s not loud about it doesn’t mean he doesn’t care.”

Kenma’s eyes widened slightly as he watched you defend him. The other person stammered before leaving, clearly overwhelmed by your fierce energy.

Kenma tugged lightly at your sleeve, his voice barely above a whisper. “You didn’t have to do that…”

“Of course I did,” you said, still fuming. “They were being unfair.”

Kenma’s lips quirked into a small, almost shy smile. “Thanks,” he said, his cheeks tinged pink. “But… you know, you don’t have to fight my battles for me.”

“I know,” you replied, softening. “I just couldn’t stand there and do nothing.”

Kenma’s gaze lingered on you for a moment before he muttered, “You’re kind of amazing, you know that?”

Noya was mid-argument, his fiery personality clashing with someone who clearly underestimated him. He was holding his ground, but the other person’s snide remarks were starting to hit a nerve.

That’s when you jumped in. “Hey! Who do you think you are, talking to him like that?” you snapped, stepping between them. “Noya’s one of the best players on the team, and he’s got more heart than you could ever understand.”

Nishinoya blinked, caught off guard as the person muttered an apology and backed off. When they were gone, he broke into a wide grin. “Y/n! That was awesome!”

You crossed your arms, still glaring in the direction the person had gone. “They had no right to talk to you like that.”

Noya laughed, throwing an arm around your shoulders. “Man, you’re fiery! I love it! You’re like my personal knight in shining armor.”

His teasing tone made you roll your eyes, but the way he looked at you—like you were the coolest person in the world—made your heart race.

Tobio wasn’t the best at handling confrontations, so when someone started criticizing him for being “too intense” on the court, he didn’t know how to respond. He stood there, frowning deeply, his fists clenched at his sides.

Before he could say anything, you stepped in. “Excuse me, but do you even know what you’re talking about?” you said, your voice firm. “Kageyama is one of the hardest-working players out there, and if you can’t see that, maybe you should just leave.”

The person hesitated before walking away, clearly intimidated by your sharp tone. Kageyama stared at you, his expression a mix of surprise and admiration.

“You didn’t have to do that,” he said quietly, scratching the back of his neck.

You turned to him, still fuming. “Of course I did! They were being ridiculous.”

His ears turned red as he muttered, “Thanks, I guess.” He avoided your gaze for a moment before adding, “It’s… nice to know you have my back.”

You smiled softly, reaching out to nudge his shoulder. “Always.”

For the rest of the day, Tobio couldn’t stop thinking about how fiercely you’d stood up for him, and he swore to himself that he’d work even harder—not for the critics, but for you.

[gildeddlily]

absolutely losing my mind because of these two!!!

so.

are these two actually toxic, or are they just kids who don't know how to communicate? easy, they're just kids! (this was fast)

reading the manga will not make you understand that (or im just stupid), and this is why I'm thanking the author on.my.knees for the spin-off!

so.

after watching the anime I fled to ao3, of course. read some works about Rin and Isagi, managed to not spoil myself anything.

then i read the U20 arc. after reading every ryusae I could find (writing one myself rn, doing god's work) I finished to read the manga cause, yk, I wanted to know what would happen with my babies and then boom! Reo and Nagi!!!

I didn't particularly care about them at first: Nagi was strong ofc, but kind of boring? he's not my favourite archetype, and while I loved Reo I hated their fight and wanted nothing to do with them. key word(s), at first.

then, then! I randomly read some fics about them cause they'd started to grow on me, and boom, tons of fics about their breakup/makeup. stunning works, ofc, but I started to see so many "Reo's fault" "Nagi's fault" "toxic relationship" that I kind of started to get uncomfortable (sometimes people throw around the word toxic when it's nothing like that), so what's to do? read the spin off ofc.

that I did, and now not only I love them both with all of my heart, but I'm Reo's number one fan (and kinnie)!

and I developed a deep hatred for those "toxic x" theories and takes. SO. let me blabber and rant.

they love each other so much!!

this is Nagi.

he thinks "damn, soccer/football is a pain, I hate sweating and running, but I don't hate Reo" even though most of the time he spends with Reo is spent playing soccer/football (I won't choose one english is so confusing- in italian it's literally called kick).

he doesn't feel forced to be Reo's friend, he likes it.

because Reo loves him, it's as simple as that.

he wants to be Nagi's friend "despite" Nagi's personality: this is something he currently says through the spin-off, which made me cry- Reo truly is the first person who ever accepted Nagi as someone who is lazy and unmotivated, who complains a lot, who doesn't put any effort in what he does, who doesn't offer much.

Or at least he thinks that he doesn't have anything special to offer, until Reo arrives.

he still has those terribly self-deprecating thoughts, but now he has something to offer, his talent.

(and after a period of happiness, their honeymoon phase one could call it, he starts to doubt the sincerity of Reo's care. from thinking "i'm not his slave, i'm his partner" he starts to doubt Reo's honesty: "maybe he only wanted to be my friend because of my talent, a talent he knows how to use"- since he still thinks that he's got nothing to offer! but we will talk about this later.)

this is Reo!

he thinks "I wanted to be the one who could make you love soccer/football, the one able to light up something in you" but he also thinks "seeing you like that, even if it wasn't me who'd done that, made me happy".

he's so jealous he's almost funny, and isn't that the most teenager thing ever?

who wouldn't be jealous after working so hard to be special to someone, just for someone else to take the place you're working so hard for?

it's terrible, but still, it doesn't stop Reo from being happy that Nagi found something exciting.

something that made Nagi as happy as the combo Nagi-soccer/football made Reo happy.

the thing is, Nagi thinks he's Reo's friend because of his talent, which maybe it's true. maybe, hadn't Nagi been a genius, they wouldn't have become friends, but his talent was the sparkle that made him become Reo's treasure.

Reo is someone who has everything, who gets everything he wants, or as he says everything except what he really wants.

for that, he has to work.

so, what he wants is to play soccer/football, and to play it with Nagi.

(in order to be Nagi's friend, he needs to work hard, because he needs to be honest and gain Nagi's trust- this is how friendship works: even when it seems flawless and easy, there's so much work behind it, and knowing it is important. most of the times we only realise it once we lost that bond- for example, Nagi. Reo already knew it, and this is why he tried so hard to not leave Nagi's side)

at one point, the two things became linked to one another, and his dream turns into "winning with Nagi, my partner". Because Nagi is talented, is special, and Reo saw his talent, and how Nagi was unable to do the same. He wants to show Nagi that soccer/football is fun, that his talent isn't a pain, that he is special, because Nagi doesn't know it, and for Reo a star that doesn't see his its own light? is just preposterous.

He cares for Nagi and loves everything about him, even all the "bad" things, and he doesn't think that Nagi has to change, and this is what, for me, makes their break-up way more serious and relatable for a lot of people.

it triggers a "I'll change to be better" "for me you never had to change" "I need to change for myself" dynamic.

2. changing and longing is way more fun when you're doing it together!!!

so they split up.

Nagi doesn't do it because he likes Isagi more, or because his style of play is more interesting, he does it because Isagi was stronger than Nagi and Reo: entering Blue Lock, Nagi had trust in Reo's ability to use his talent to win, he didn't even think about failing, and while Barou came close to making him feel like he could loose, Nagi overpowered him at the end- but then Isagi beats Nagi, and Reo with him.

Nagi understands that Reo's dream can't become reality if they aren't the strongest, and if being together doesn't work, maybe they should split up, part ways, become stronger and then join forces again, and win everything. win the world cup.

while his friendship with Isagi is sweet and I love them, for Nagi Isagi is like a cyclette.

he'll use the cyclette to get get fit and make his bf swoon over his legs, he won't stay with the cyclette once he doesn't need the training anymore. and even if he will, it will always be just the cyclette he uses to get fit "for" his bf.

(metaphor isn't metaphoring)

Reo doesn't know that.

he knows he's strong, but he knows that Isagi and Nagi are on a whole other level and he feels threatened. he fears that Nagi will choose Isagi instead of him, and he tries desperately to not loose Nagi.

Nagi is his dream. Slowly, day after day, Nagi became part of his dream, and now he's losing not only his best friend but the dream that made him free.

Reo says it himself- he knows that Nagi did the smartest thing by leaving, but he's young and scared and sees it as Nagi leaving him.

He feels abandoned, and he thinks that Nagi is abandoning his dream to go with the bigger fish, the apex predator, in order to become the best striker, by forgetting the promises they made at the start of Blue Lock, to stay together til the end.

Neither of them forgets the other.

Nagi leaves, and all he thinks about it "I need Reo to see this" "I can't wait to let him see how much I've improved", and he misses Reo, just as much as Reo misses him.

the only difference?

Reo is oblivious about Nagi's real feelings and thought process, and his thinking of Nagi turns into spiraling into depression and self-hatred.

so Nagi changes.

he starts to see the beauty in soccer/football, he finally sees what Reo had tried to make him see for months, and he's thrilled. he's having fun. he's grateful that Reo convinced him to not discard Blue Lock immediately. he's different.

different why? because Isagi beat him? because Blue Lock happened?

he changed not when Isagi beat them, but the moment he became Reo's friend, and found a reason to do something.

because Reo was the first person to ever tell him that his laziness, boredom, his oh so troublesome antics were alright, that he was what he was, and he was enough not only for Reo, but for the whole world.

Reo accepted him even when he was set on being static, made him want to change, and now that he's changing he feels worthy of being loved so much.

"you saw something in me back then, you forced to me work hard, and now thanks to you I ('m on my way to) realised my own worth, now I found something exciting"

he changes.

Reo sees him after what, a few days, and he's already improved so much.

and he thinks that he was Nagi's cage, his personal dead weight, that Nagi may have been his treasure but he wasn't Nagi's. that Nagi doesn't need him anymore. if Nagi doesn't need him, what will be of his dream?

(we could start a long-ass post ab mental health and recovering but I won't for my own sanity)

what's his worth then, since he got into Blue Lock just to stay with Nagi till the end- especially when he can't even be number two, with Isagi there- and Nagi won't be with him anymore?

he needs to change too.

3. destroying yourself in order to change (no fun)

Reo says that he isn't brave enough to destroy himself like the others do.

Isagi, Barou, Nagi, Chigiri, they all destroy themselves in order to become stronger and change, evolve, but Reo can't. he's scared, he's confused, the whole arc is just him looking like that. then what does he do?

he lets Nagi destroy him. "If I can't do it, Nagi will" don't you understand you're doing exactly what you say you're unable to do? the fact that you're not the one pulling the trigger doesn't mean that you're not killing yourself

he pushes Nagi until he snaps and tells Reo to fuck off, that he's a pain, that he's weak and someone Nagi doesn't want anything to do with, because that's what Reo thinks.

He thinks Nagi doesn't want to be with him anymore, he's feeling guilty for what he thought (later later), he's insecure- and instead of being reasonable, he founds a way to confirm his "irrational" fears.

"I'm not being insecure since Nagi confirmed it"

he sabotages himself. that's the nail in the coffin.

instead of destroying himself with football/soccer, by learning from a lost match, he destroys himself with life, by putting on the line his relationship with the person he (not exaggerating) loves most in the world.

he's unable to distinguish life from soccer/football (and this will be the aspect that makes him so different from most of the other characters), because since meeting Nagi they've become one thing. soccer/football is his life, Nagi is his life, because they're his only chance at being happy.

(Nagi is able to distinguish between the court and Reo: this way, Reo is just as special as Isagi is, since Isagi may have made him see the fun in soccer/football, but Reo made him get angry. Nagi who thinks that his strong quality is the fact he never gets angry, that he's a pacifist. Isagi is his soccer/football revolution, Reo is his life revolution.

Reo can't. they all insult each other on the field, but they're all friends afterwards. not Reo. not yet)

now he's lost Nagi, and his dream, and he has to pick himself up from the ground.

this is how Reo changes.

4. miscommunication is a beast

As I said before, Nagi starts to think that Reo only cared about him because of his talent. he's angry at Reo. he doesn't understand why Reo said those things, why he was so stupid, why he didn't understand Nagi.

he says "I'm not his toy" and he isn't, but really, try to get into his shoes.

he thinks his partner, his best friend, doesn't believe in them as a duo anymore, doesn't want to believe in them like he used to now that Nagi has changed, now that he's more "independent" from Reo.

"what, now that I know how to fight alone, he doesn't want me anymore?" that would be anyone's first thought.

and he doubts Reo's trust in their dream.

when did Reo start to have so little faith in them, in Nagi? when did he give up on them? he thinks that, after spending weeks trying to improve just to make Reo's dream true.

and he's angry, but he still hopes to play with Reo again.

he still want to, because him and Reo are partners and Nagi still believes in their dream. because he remembers Reo's passion, and he believes in him.

+) 5. being relatable as fuck

(what kid with absent/abusive parents never thought back on their action and went anxiously all "Am I just like them?")

Reo begs Nagi to stop being so strong, stop improving so quickly, stop running towards a place Reo can't reach yet, and isn't this a human thing to do? He desperately wants to be with Nagi, and thinks that he'd rather stop him from improving rather than lose him. He thinks "Please, give up on your dream, your ego"- and isn't that familiar?

he just thought the same thing his father, a man he hates and despises and who doesn't believe in Reo, told him. and he said that to Nagi. Nagi who gave him a ticket to the top by being at his side, who let him see hope.

he panics. am I just like him? Am I cruel enough to wish for someone to give up on their dreams, just to get something out of their failure?

he's different from his father, because he's seventeen, he's scared to lose his best friend, and we can be irrational in situations like this one. does he know it? no, the same way he doesn't understand that Nagi didn't left because of him.

so yes, he's in the worst head-space ever.

isn't he relatable? this is what that made reo my favourite character in a second, probably. he's so human and he makes so many mistakes and he's so stupid sometimes, but I can see myself in him very clearly.

and now.

in what way is their relationship not balanced? their love and care not mutual? in what way one used or manipulated the other?

I think they're flawed, and they made mistakes, and they hurt each other, but I also think that we throw in the word "toxic" the moment a relationship isn't perfect.

they're friends and they're teens, they will make mistakes and they will hurt each other, and their friendship (and they were roommates) won't be perfect- this doesn't make it less genuine or beautiful.

don't get me started on what happens in the manga (really don't do it) (all of this was just nagi's spin off!!!)

[mejaemin]

˚　✦　.　　. 　 ˚　.　. ✦　˚　　. ★⋆. 　.   ˚　　* . ✦　. ˚ . ✦ ˚ 　.　˚ .

untitled - yoon jeonghan

wc: 0.7k summary: jeonghan always knows what you need, and won’t ever hesitate to give it to you warnings: being v sad, being comforted + taken care of an: crazy how the only time i write for my main ult is when i myself need comforting…

˚　✦　.　　. 　 ˚　.　. ✦　˚　　. ★⋆. 　.   ˚　　* . ✦　. ˚ . ✦ ˚ 　.　˚ .

you walk in the front door, and jeonghan’s eyes light up from where he’s sitting in the living room. it warms your heart, truly, seeing the way he goes from all sunken into the cushions right into perfect posture, full of joy. you give him a half assed smile, too lazy and unmotivated to give him anything better. you can’t see it when you reach down to remove your shoes, but his expression softens and he’s on his way over to you to take your bag and help you.

when you stand back up, he’s got a hand on your shoulder, and all he needs to do is give you a look, silently asking do you want to talk? and it’s so sweet, seeing how much he cares to avoid even prompting a conversation when you’re not ready, you shake your head softly, immediately letting your head fall into his shoulder once the tears come.

he pulls you into him, a hand rubbing your back while the other runs over your head. “you’re okay,” he whispers into your hair, voice deep and comforting against your body. “i’m here.”

your patience has been tested many times today, people yelling at you and overall disturbing your peace. you’re good at keeping your cool, letting yourself fall numb to these daily occurrences, and essentially going on autopilot for the entire work day. you were still in that mindset when you got here, but seeing jeonghan, so sweet, treating you with such fragile care, it brings you right back to earth and all that frustration falls down to nothing but tears, your vulnerability coming through. there isn’t even anger anymore, just a feeling of being tired.

you pull your head away, wiping at the wet spot on his shoulder. he chuckles, holding your face in his hands to wipe at your tears with his thumbs.

“come,” he says, placing a hand on your shoulder to lead you into your bedroom. your feet drag, hurting and tired, yet he stays patient, matching your pace until he can finally push the door open and sit you down on the bed.

he sits next to you, letting out a little ‘oof’ as he does so. with calm, gentle hands he helps remove your clothes, gently lifting them over your head. it might be simple, but for every movement you make to help him in the process earns you a kiss on the cheek. words of praise fall from his lips all the way until your done, left in your underwear. wordlessly, you turn your back to him, and his cold fingers leave goosebumps on your arms as he unclips your bra. his eyes stay up as he grabs your discarded clothing, putting it away before grabbing a shirt for you. it’s one of his, on the baggier side.

he slips it on for you and it’s baggy enough to cover some of your legs and feel comfortable. with a gentle nudge he leads you to lay down, pulling the blanket over you before turning to shut the light off. when he comes back to bed, he gets on his side, covering himself with the blanket. he brings you close, draping an arm over your stomach, and eventually his breathing evens. you try to fall asleep too, but there’s too many thoughts plaguing your mind to let you do so.

“hannie..?” you speak up, voice tiny and hoarse due to being silent for so long.

after a beat of silence, you hear a ‘hmmm?’ come from beside you.

“can you..” feeling too exhausted to speak, you just tug on his arm, dragging him a little closer until his body is partially on top of you.

eventually he gets the message, picking the blanket up to scoot over, until he’s finally on top of you, he gently lowers his weight down, nuzzling his head into your shoulder. it’s a common occurrence to have him lay on you, the weight extremely soothing and healing to your mind. he’s more than happy to do it for you at any time, i mean, he’s not exactly one to complain about being held and cuddled every once in a while. finally, you relax, the pressure on your torso allowing your body to finally release its tension and sink into the mattress. jeonghan presses a few soft kisses into the crook of your neck before they finally still, resting against your skin as he sleeps. you’re right there with him, your arms tight around his body as your mind finally calms and you succumb to your own fatigue.

˚　✦　.　　. 　 ˚　.　. ✦　˚　　. ★⋆. 　.   ˚　　* . ✦　. ˚ . ✦ ˚ 　.　˚ .

perm taglist: @chenlezip @coquettejunnie

[ba9go]

50 rounds of uppercuts (pt. 2)

gymbro!bakugou katsuki x fem!reader

part 1 💥 part 3 (coming soon)

you hate to say it, but bakugou was right.

your eyes went wide as saucers. you did one rep, then two, and you made it to eight before you completed your set.

"holy shit," you breathed, slightly winded. you slowly lower your butt down to the ground. "i didn't know i could do that."

bakugou shrugs. "you're welcome."

"how did you know?" you turn to look up at bakugou with a frown.

"i see you here like, thrice a week," bakugou scowls. "you've just been holding yourself back."

and suddenly, you realise that you're talking to japan's number 2 pro-hero, dynamight. not only that, but he's a regular at your neighbourhood gym. surely, the number 2 pro-hero has better things to pay attention to aside from your half-assed hip thrusts?

nevermind that, this was THE dynamight standing next to you right now. should you ask him for an autograph? probably not, he's kinda prickly, right? or maybe that's just his branding? big, scary, intimidating dynamight— who's giving you gym advice like your average gym bro?

"what the fuck," bakugou sneers at you, crossing his arms in front of his chest. your eyes jump immediately to the way his biceps bulge and you blush like a fangirl. fuck it, maybe you will ask him for an autograph. you're sold. dynamight stan for-fucking-life.

"you got a problem? say it to my fuckin' face, pink cheeks," he practically hisses at you, and holy fuck, you're so sold. the dynamight branding. it fucking sells. this guy's brand image is genius. this is so good. literally the fucking best—

"would ya stop FUCKIN' ogling me like a piece of meat and fuckin' say somethin' like a normal person?! what are ya, a sociopath? ya got a fuckin' problem—"

bakugou continues berating you as you shift yourself out from under the barbell resting over your lap. he's so loud (as advertised) and angry (also as advertised) and you are so going to ask him for his—

"—just fuckin' ask if ya want my number or somethin', don't be so fuckin' weird about it for fuck's sake!"

autograph???????

'FUCK his autograph,' you think to yourself as you fumble for your phone in the pocket of your gym shorts. you open your contacts list but you don't even get to hand it to him before he snatches your phone from you and slams his number into your keypad.

"fuckin' weirdo," bakugou grumbles as he shoves your phone back into your hands, before turning around abruptly.

as bakugou walks away, you're left standing in the middle of the gym with stars in your eyes. and yes, you are still staring at his amazing figure. god, it's fucking illegal, the way his shoulders are so fucking broad and his waist is so fucking tiny.

he doesn't turn around to face you as he raises a hand to wave lazily. "see ya around, ya fuckin' dork."

his harsh words should not be making you this happy, but holy fuck, dynamight's branding was so fucking on-point.

it's only after he walks out of the gym that you finally tear your gaze from his back and look down at your phone.

you entered the gym feeling lazy and unmotivated. you left the gym a fucking dynamight stan.

god, you loved being a gym girl.

sorry for the inactivity. i had a stressful fucking week of uni and going to the gym was LITERALLY the HIGHLIGHT OF MY WEEK. super motivated to finish this fic now. this fic is a tribute to gym and all the gym girls and gym bros out there. SHOUT OUT TO MY FELLOW GYMRATS

taglist (thank you for your support!!): @anicaaa67 @maddietries @valeriyaaak @v3n7s @deimosjay @zaiban2989 @girls-overflower @notmeduhh @dreamcastgirl99 @busdriver-move-that-ass @atashiboba @kathsuhki @armeenix @channnee @antiwhores @sukunasbottomlefteyeball @kenqki @vikizzy @thesimpybitch @eempxth @hanta-seros-wifey @gold24fish

[remedyturtles]

10 with Leo and Raph would be so interesting. (Thought I can't really picture either of them saying somthing that mean to eachother, so maybe mystics are involved?)

I hope you have a nice day!

great minds think alike y'all. thanks @bluemoonsymphonies and anon for the prompt! i hope u both enjoy....

wordcount 1k, pre-movie

10. "Please... what am I doing wrong?" "What aren't you doing wrong?!"

Leo’s throat hurt. 

Just add it to the list of bullshit that Raph was doing to him. Because there was absolutely no reason that Raph had to come and interrupt him while he was snoozing on the bean bag. Like, this lecture could’ve totally waited until later. Maybe after Leo had gotten some fucking sleep. 

“You’re not taking this seriously!” Raph said.

“You could not be more of a broken record if you tried, Rapha.” Leo hadn’t gotten up from the bean bag and suffocated a yawn into his fist. He was tired of the grating arguments and he was tired, just bone tired of the fighting for no reason. And tired in general. Because his head was so loud and when he laid down to sleep there was just… screaming there too. 

“That’s because you’re not listening to me.” Raph poked him right between the eyes. “I gotta drill it in that empty head somehow.”

Leo twitched. That was a bit harsh, especially since it wasn’t a gentle poke. He was feeling a little ganged up on and crawled out of the bean bag to stand his ground, crossing his arms. “Yeesh, tell me how you really feel.” 

“I think you’re lazy and unmotivated.” Raph scoffed. “We’ve got so much we could be doing and you’re sleeping in the middle of the day.”

Leo… paused. Stared at his brother with a bit of hurt shock. He was really coming at him, no holds barred. He held up his hands in surrender and said, “And wow, I think you’re a huge jerk. What the hell, dude? For your information, I barely slept last night, so get off me.”

Something flickered in Raph’s eyes. But it didn’t stay. He scoffed again, louder and more derogatory, raising up his lip to sneer with his snaggletooth. “You’re not even trying.”

“Wow.” Leo repeated. Hands still raised, skin goosebumping, a chill from the undisguised scorn. This was different from the usual annoyed arguing. This was … mean. “Okay. Please, let's hear it. What am I doing wrong, then?”

“What aren't you doing wrong?” Raph spat back, chest heaving. Genuine anger sung hot and heavy. 

Leo stared. This sounded a lot like the inside of his own head. Which didn't make sense, because that wasn't Raph. He pushed and he pushed but he was never like this. Not his Raph. Not his lovable big lug of a brother who truly only wanted the best for all of them. 

“Nothing to say?” Raph tilted his head to the side. His eyes were rather blank, now that Leo was making painful eye contact with him. 

“Are you feeling okay?” Leo prompted.

Raph blinked rapidly, surprised, then shook his head. “What are you talking about? You’re the one who's a problem here."

"Yeah, something is definitely wrong." Leo stepped forward, cataloguing other symptoms as he went. "You give me a hard time, you piss me off, and you nag me. But you're never, ever mean. So what gives?"

Raph was sweating. Not any of his usual sweat, not a scent Leo could pinpoint with scary accuracy. Something unheard of. When Leo got closer, he could see the pin-pricked pupil and too-quick breathing. He practically growled at Leo as he got close. 

"Relax." Leo smiled, charming, getting another step closer to the lion's den. Flickering his gaze over Raph to try and find some kind of clue. "I get you, I know you want me to try, etc etc. But you wouldn't just brush past me telling you I hadn't slept, because you know I hate being honest about that. You'd be beating my ass with a pillow to go to bed then and try again in the morning. So either you've been possessed by a demon or cursed. Which is it?"

"I'm not –" Raph lurched forward.

But Leo had already spotted it. He pinched the little bug between his thumb and forefinger and pulled – a parasitic scarab bit down into the skin of his neck. The moment it left Raph's body, the little pincers wiggled agitatedly in the air, and Leo surveyed the bug with a distasteful eye. 

Raph inhaled sharply, hand flying to his neck, and took two staggering steps backwards. He breathed, "What the fuck."

Leo waved the evil little beetle at him. "Did you piss off someone? Maybe walk through a magical rainforest?"

"I – I – " Raph's face morphs into one of pure horror. "I'm so sorry."

"Aw, buddy." Leo opened a portal and flicked the beetle through it, sending the fucker to the moon. Then he waved it away and opened his hands in offer. "It's okay. I know you better than that." 

Raph scooped him up in a hug so tight it took his breath away. He squeezed and squeezed and Leo bore it with the patience of someone who'd been a teddy bear for this man many a time. 

"It's okay." Leo mumbled to him. 

"Not really." Raph replied, miserable.

"You didn't mean it." Leo shrugged.

The arms around him tightened. Raph shuddered a breath.

"Okay, maybe you meant it a little bit." Leo amended, because it wasn't like this conversation was new. Just the vitriol at which he spat it. "But bud, I know you're not coming at me to hurt me. I'd never think that. You're literally doing this because you want me to be my best. I'm not stupid. I'm just really, really good at acting like it."

Raph pulled back enough to show his red eyes. "Then why won't you work with me here?"

Leo couldn't say, because I'm scared my best isn't good enough. Instead he pat his big brother's arm and said, "Let's get you checked out and make sure that beetle didn't cause any lasting effects, hey?"

"Leo–" Raph growled.

Too late. Leo eeled out of his grip and danced away, waving over his shoulder. "Come on, chop chop, I don't have all day you know."

Raph… sighed. And followed, shoulders hanging.

[shaisuki]

Can you do (separate scenarios of course <3)Bachira, Nagi, Chigiri, and whoever else you’d like to add in a scenario where their chubby and soft girlfriend tries her hardest not to be insecure about her body but the insecurity really sneaks up on her a lot? So like, when the bfs find out, not only do they comfort her, but they show her just how much they love and adore her body if you catch my drift <3 Thank you so much!!

❝ ENDLESS ADORATION. ❞

FEATURING. BACHIRA MEGURU, NAGI SEISHIRO, CHIGIRI HYOMA, BAROU SHOUEI

CONTENT WARNINGS. body insecurities + self-loathing + body dysphoria + smut + mean barou + implied fingering + degradation.

NOTES. i'm so sorry it took so long nonnie. it wasn't deleted or anything but i hope you like it, nonnie. thank you for requesting!

SYNOPSIS. don't ever let them catch you being insecure about your body, they had plenty of ways to show you how much they adore your body and you.

BACHIRA MEGURU

“you could be so mean to me, baby.” he whispers. his hands roaming all over to the expanse of your soft body. his bright yellow eyes glowing more than ever at its reflection in the mirror.

he got you trapped from his grip. his arms snaking to your soft middle while his jaw rests on your shoulder. caught in the middle of you criticizing yourself and bachira wouldn't allow that. “how selfish.” he mutters. his teeth grazing at the shell of your ear and it sends the slightest of tremors throughout your body.

you can't help but to tear up a bit. “h—how am i selfish, megu?” you stammer. avoiding your reflection at the large mirror in front of you. you don't want to see yourself nor catch him staring at you with those round eyes of his. so full of life, enthusiasm. confidence. a thing that you will never attain.

“you're selfish for hating, keeping this body that is mine. who gave you that idea, hmm? it's not your place to judge this body that i dearly love and its owner.” he hums, chuckling that it reverberates to your skin and to your aching core. his palm gliding through your stomach lifting the pesky clothing to reveal the stomach that's far from being leaned nor toned. it is round, the excess fat protruding giving you the impression of a pouch but bachira could careless about it. his fingers sinking to the soft flesh, like paws of cat kneading and pressing the fleshiness of your skin.

“what if this cute stomach of yours is flat? i couldn't hold it. what i am going to do with my hands...” he mutters, pinching your stomach then his fingers glides through the skin of your thighs. “this thighs of yours, how is it going to crush me if this isn't that thick, warm me even. so selfish.” prying your thighs open and his hand settles to the mound between them. slender and nimble fingers brushing through your panties. rubbing your slit and a huge grin plastered in his face when the wetness of your fat pussy began to drench your panties.

“don't be mean to this body of mine, baby. perhaps i'll show you what i'm capable of to make those silly ideas forming in your head disappear.” he says, pressing a chaste kiss to your round cheek.

“i hope you can take me cause i ain't stopping.” bachira's eyes glowing more than ever and you know what it means when he get this riled up. his grin wider and you braced yourself. you know it all too well and you accepted it.

those thoughts of yours wouldn't be visiting you anytime soon after bachira had fucked you into oblivion.

NAGI SEISHIRO

nagi isn't insecure.

the word is foreign to him and the feeling of it. he's lazy, unmotivated and such unwanted thoughts isn't welcome and worth worrying over. why would he bother with such thing when in the first he didn't care. that's what he thought until he met you.

his soft, chubby girlfriend who had been nothing but loving and supporting to him. nagi didn't quite the gist when he caught you staring at yourself in the mirror with a frown in your lips. he only looks at you briefly before going back to his console. paying it no mind since when did nagi felt of being insecure.

then it began to affect him and yours. mostly yours. when you began to push his affections.

“seishiro, not now please.” your voice coming in a low whisper. gently pushing your white haired boyfriend in his head. shifting into more of a comfortable position in your bed. nagi groans, lips curling into a frown. a rare occurrence of him. he doesn't get upset since he don't like giving things the benefit of his time when he can give it to something more important.

he doesn't stop though. his huge build hovering above yours before putting his whole weight to yours. “sei!” you scolded him but nagi didn't listen burying his face in to your neck. nuzzling like a cat, he's almost purring from it.

he shakes his head. interlocking his fingers with yours. placing it beside yours and you were left powerless against your boyfriend's overwhelming strength. his lips finding refuge in your neck, tongue moving to lick the soft spot of your neck.

this isn't nagi who would make an effort to go down in you. well, at times when he's feeling it. the need to show you how much he loves you.

“pretty.” he murmurs. his hand now holding your thigh even though his large palm engulfs the majority of your thigh it wasn't enough to cover how big it was. placing it beside his torso grind his bulge to your cunt. “i always need you, want you.” he says. pressing a sloppy, lazy kiss to your lips.

nagi isn't good at words but he's willing to try for his soft, chubby girlfriend. it would be troublesome if he can't get his girl out of those thoughts of hers.

CHIGIRI HYOMA

chigiri's blessed with his looks that every people that within his eyesight cranes their neck to marvel at his looks. it didn't matter that he was rather feminine than other girls and he gets teased a lot by the guys around him. he just take after his mother.

there's no time to feel inadequate at things let alone how he perceive himself. he couldn't remember when the last time he felt insecure or been really insecure about himself and then he fell in love with you or it is that how being in love is. he have you and he was contented at that and being with you. he has to fight the battles that dwells inside you and chigiri isn't good at it. comforting another human being even it is his significant other.

so he tries. sees your eyes brimming with tears whenever he calls you pretty and he's confused.

“i'm not chigiri! look at you, you're beautiful and i'm not, you're lying.” he was taken aback at your outburst at him but he is quick to wipe your tears away while he whispers the very words that comforts you.

his sweet, crybaby.

“so, i am but you will always be my pretty baby.” brushing the loose strands of his reddish pink hair to see you better. he kisses you desperately like you were the air to fill his lungs to breathe again and you both stared at each other. he smirks when he sees you're already in a daze. mind spinning and only you can think is him.

his nimble fingers working through the garment of your panties. toying with hem before pulling at it downward to show that pretty pussy he's deprived of.

so he pumps his finger full in in your sopping hole. watch as it drips with slick coating his fingers. hear that delicious squelch while he stretches you. his ego inflating the more he hears you moan, call his name in the same breathy way that got you begging from him. all your insecurities dissipating like bubbles from the way his fingers stretches you out. he could do this forever.

wait until he fucks you dumb. you will forget those stupid insecurities along with your name.

BAROU SHOEI

barou doesn't play nice nor comfort you with those silly, sweet words that one needs to hear when in a struggle of battling with themselves. he simply doesn't need to play nice and comfort you and what only to question it again.

his actions says otherwise. he got you on all fours, your ass raised in a position you never knew you could. his hands gripping your round stomach so tight while he pounds you from the back. it is relentless. the groans and the moans mixing with one another while you hold tightly in his muscular arms his other hand cupping your jaw. forcing you to look in the mirror.

“you are nothing but my cocksleeve.” he says in between grunts. his red eyes glimmering, peering at his girlfriend who is currently sobbing, moaning like a broken record while tears streamed down at her round face. you whimper at what he just called you.

“you are. there's no denial in that. look at you, crying a baby and yet your pussy squeezing me like a whore.” the words stung and he spoke it the way he means it and barou isn't known to lie. his tongue made of barbed wires that is meant to hurt, talk about how awful everyone and you believed it that you are his own for him to use. your cries a little louder and thick droplets of your tears falling from your eyes.

it's funny how his words hurt you and it works like magic forgetting your earlier dilemma of hating yourself, of hating the body you live with.

you let him. bruise your body with his thrusts, with his touch. if this is the only way to forget everything so be it.

and so he did. he breathes in your cheek. growling at the way your cunt clenches tightly around him. you did feel so good to him. he cups your jaw harder, squishing it with much strength that you can't speak. your body reeling in sensitivity that you failed to notice how he pays attention to your soft bits. particularly to the parts where it leaves you frowning and he loves every part of you.

that's why he gives them the love, the care that you will never bother to give but available to scrutinize and he's filling out that so one day, you'll stop looking at them that they've wronged you and barou isn't the one to get mushy. he is still the hotheaded, competitive, bulky man that would not admit he loves you but his actions tells another story.

with the tight squeeze of your cunt around him, he finally reaches his high. yours and his orgasm hurling at you both that he can't help but to bite your shoulder and you — only a broken moan that music to his ears.

if this is the only way to shut you up and comfort, he'll do it over and over again until you can't speak no more and your eyes are brimmed with tears.

[torantuga]

i was unmotivated to draw this week so i forced myself to draw in diff styles - and i chose to redesign emmk cus i love them both sm (even tho i dont even enjoy td anymore)

buut then i got the idea of maybeeee i could make a what-if scenario where julia-mk-emma alliance could be made

so here they are!

EXPLANATION BELOW!!! (warning, maybe ooc but it's a rewrite + redesign)

sooo what im bringing to the table is a rewrite of their characters - esp s1

JULIA

for julia, i wanted to make the twist villain thing for s2, which might sound weird... but i can explain

she mantains the happy-go-hippie personality as a facade during the time she stays in the island, whilst in the background she's actively sabotaging other contestants with the help of mk. she only shows her true colors after mk betrays her (which i kept the same, probably after the merge tho) and she gets kicked out. (iii feel like mk would stay longer BUT not be a finalist, mainly cus in this redesign she plans things through very VERY carefully)

she would be used as the main villain for s2, and she would be like julia in mid s1 probably - petty, strategic and, most importantly, deadly. she replaces her tropical, pinkish clothing with blueish popular outfits and she becomes mean as she can be. hostile, she becomes someone to fear as she turns her gentle face into one full of disgust for those around her.

MK

So. you guys know i love MK - shes the whole reason i still havent let go of td - so im giving her the best character ever!

calculative, observative, and sneaky, shes the definition of a stellar strategist. she makes herself look average just to pass by smoothly, and she sabotages everyone she cans to assure she stays that way until the very end.

though she's snarky, she understands that overdoing it might get her on a radar. she observes everyone she can to understand them on face value in order to know how to approach them.

she's naturally drawn to julia, as she notices things in her behavior that differentiate her from genuinely nice people like priya or emma. her smile twitches when no one looks, her eyes do not smile along with her mouth... she's as fake as she can be.

so she observes her during the first episodes, trying to make a conclusion and find a way to get her on her good side.

so she confronts julia alone, which makes julia drop the act and threaten her. mk assures julia that shes in no way trying to threaten her, and that she wants to form an alliance, which julia then accepts after some convincing that they were probably the best duo in the game so far.

she's still got a lot of character outside julia though, and she shows it through her snarky attitude when it comes to everything, and her master thief tactics that she uses to hack and learn what challenge is going to happen and how she's going to eliminate certain people that oppose a threat to her.

However, a duo like them always needs a backup to throw under the bus at any circumstance of danger, so they decide to pick a gullible, insecure person....

EMMA

A nice, silly girl that has some bottled up anger from years and years of frustration she was told to keep in because of her internet persona.

after a messy break up and a fine that cost her almost thousands of dollars, she's pretty sure the bottled up anger is now cracking. she's no longer a youtube star, as her ex's channel was the only thing keeping her trendy, so she no longer needed to spread herself thin to please an audience - to please him.

so! chase is here! hm! how the FUCK is she supposed to continue the game knowing that her stupid ex is in the same tv show as her?!

he's dumb, lazy, and apathetic. he shouldn't be there to begin with!

...so she tries to ignore him as much as she can, though he sometimes makes her want to scream.

either way, her ex aside, she tries to be kind to everyone she meets, but everyone sees her as gullible and naïve cus of it. shes letting everyone see her insecurities by simply existing, and though she's friends with bowie, everyone guesses she won't make it far. she's fun, silly, but also weird in her own way.

mk observes emma and concludes that she's the perfect pawn for their game, and so she finds her alone to play mindgames on her, knowing that her biggest insecurity is not being a good people-pleaser.

mk manages to convince emma that she should join the alliance, and so she accepts. emma's not happy about it though, but she understands mk wouldn't let her join if she didn't saw potential.

THE ALLIANCE

mk, julia and emma are underestimated due to their actions, so it's not hard to cheat in challenges that way. emma finds this a bit uncomfortable, but she helps them with social intel. she's the least suspicious of the bunch, so she can eavesdrop with ease since she's not seen as a threat.

they manage to kick out chase and ripper with ease, and they go unpunished through the series.

well. until mk betrays julia, that is.

mk knows that her days are counted if she keeps julia around for too long, so she frames her as soon as she feels things going against her. it is not pretty, and julia swears on her life she'll take her down.

but she didn't betray emma.

mk never mentioned emma being in the alliance, causing her to get the boot as soon as possible, which is 2 episodes after julia.

emma stays to be in the final five, but she doesn't end up winning.

mk swears it's so that they can team up next season, but it's something more.

HOW EMMK CAN STILL WIN

mk originally was going to betray both of them, but she couldn't. not emma.

emma was a genuinely nice person to be around, and though she was useless when it came to actual scheming, she was funny and understanding.

mk had a big crush, long story short, and couldn't bring herself to see emma get hurt like that. if she had had a crush on julia, which she thought she had, she would've still betrayed her. it was strategy, and there were no hard feelings.

but emma? mk believes seeing her sad face would probably ruin her. she's a truthful person, and mk admires that.

so she and emma stay friends, and continue being alliance members in s2, which escalates into something more.

S2

i believe s2 wld be julia vs mk in terms of main villains, and emmk wld be the main focus when it comes to mk and emma screentime.

julia tries her hardest to sabotage, and mk counterattacks in default, leaving them to battle for dominance all the way til the merge, when mk gets eliminated instead of julia. emma is heartbroken due to her ...friend.. getting kicked out, and she follows the next elimination.

idk for s3 but maybe mk wld be a finalist or win cus my girl needs a win under her belt!!!

[purpdrawsthings]

ᏆͲ'Տ მსს 𝙵𝙾𝚁 𝑇𝐻𝐸 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 ＯＦ 𝔗ℌ𝔈 𝒱𝐼𝐸𝒲𝐸𝑅𝒮 !

He's no longer here.

ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST MY BELOVED I LOVE YOUUUUUUU

Anyways wth it's been 6 hours since the sketch my apologize I'm on a family trip rn sisgdihssihdidhsid

I kinda got confused on what colors to use + I was very very lazy and unmotivated to shade each part individually so yeah you get this.

Anyways I just wanna say my god that last ask was really unexpected like I didn't think he would get controlled by more terrifying version Puzzles

Oh and if youre asking how I did that funni font at the start it's just an app ✨

Hey chat I have an idea why don't we call this guy "Scripted 3"

Wait that sounds so cool sidsishdidh

Cannon?? Explodes

Anyways uhhhh enjoy this lazy ass piece ig aidgdihsoshsodhs I'm so lazy to type guh..

Yeetus :3

@michaelscorneroftheinternet @dorriostareyes

[shira-cosmic-star]

Thoughts for Pennies pt 11

This a sad thought I got. All of the ghouls are suffering from something in their lives. I’ve talked about Ritsu on post and now I’m going to talk about Jin.

Jin loves his mom so much. He planted her favorite flowers on his balcony. He waters them and looks at them pretty often. He tells Mc that it’s his mother’s favorite. It really shows how deep their son’s and mother bond is. I can only imagine why he doesn’t like his father and how much his mother really meant to him.

What if his father is a sleazy type of man, who sleeps with other women? Or was abusive in someways? Or maybe his father wasn’t there often for the both of them and his mother was a stay at home mom and took care of Jin?

Jin’s mother died due to some type of illness. It was said to be a psychological illness. We don’t know what illness it is. It very much could be more than one too. It could’ve been depression, which all mental disorders can be genetic/inherited.

Which explains why Jin is easily irritated, “lazy,” has an addiction to smoking, sleeps a lot, feels unmotivated and isolates himself from others. Jin hasn’t met anyone who is willing to build a real genuine connection with him. His “best friend,” turned on him too. People around him in his dorm likes him for his money, status and looks. He doesn’t even know if he can fully trust Tohma.

Then Mc enters into his world, and little by little. Mc is slowly chipping that ice around his heart. He hates the fact that Mc is walking on eggshells around him. But he opens up little by little about the flowers that are his mother’s favorite. He helps her in Vagastrom’s dorm. He saves Mc, Luca and Kaito on the mission. He even sends the cruise for Mc and Jabberwock. Heck, even though he used Mc to set his dorm back in order. He buys them three dress with accessories and shoes to go with it. All for the party and he chose them to dance with.

Mc was the only one he danced with, mainly because Mc is the only one he felt comfortable dance with. Mc never asked for money, never tried push him or anything, never tried to seduce him (which I imagine so many girls from his dorm tried to), never forced him to talk about his life. Sure they were curious about some things about his life, but when he tells them to end the topic. They do.

Jin even trust them to do some of the tasks he tells them to do. Clean his room, telling the chief what to cook, getting Tohma, wash his clothes, send them to the dry cleaners and the list goes on. Maybe it’s because his mother was this nurturing woman that some of the qualities, Mc has shown towards him?

There’s a reason why he allows Mc to hang around him. He isn’t the type to use someone and throw them away when he’s bored. Besides out of all the women and men in his dorm. He chose the most basic and none problematic person to assist him even though he can literally tell Tohma or anyone to do it. Yet, he trust Mc.

(Now if you’ll excuse me. I’m going to cry because Jin is one of my favorites. I’m too sensitive for this😭)

[uchihaharlot]

Hi!! Just discovered your blog and love your writing — I’d love to see more Sasuke content!! he’s my absolute favorite 🫣🫠 personal headcanon but I feel like he’s the type that would fall for a friend, or friend of a friend, and not even realize it until he’s getting mad she’s not coming onto him like everyone else does, and then he thinks about that and he’s like oh wait…

and then he’d like make it his mission in life to get her to beg for him in evvvvery way 😏 if you are taking requests, I am horny af for him and would love to see your take on Sasuke finally *ahem* winning her over and giving her more than she knows what to do with, taking everything he wants from her…

but also mainly just any nsfw Sasuke content from you would make me sooo happy 🥵💕

Hello my lovely ☺️ welcome to my little slutty corner of the world and I’m glad you’re here. When I saw your request(s) I got so damn giddy. Sasuke was my original Uchiha bae. Called him, Sasbae 😂😂 I still love him, but more like an ex boyfriend now.

Lmao Sasuke inadvertently falling for a friend of a friend that he saw for all of ten minutes once is just too funny for me. And all too real for him. (SO LINKS WONT LET ME ADD THIS TO MY MASTERLIST??)

NSFW; Sasuke getting blown like the wind by a girl he couldn’t even wrap his head around; so she wraps her lips around his head

Like he wouldn’t even know what to do with himself. I think out of all the Uchiha, Sasuke is the easiest to fall the hardest. Maybe Shisui second, but he’s somewhat more precautionary with his heart. Sasuke just gets struck with Cupids arrow and his soul is on fire 🔥 his heart burns and his blood boils with the intensity of a thousand stars. He just goes from chill to one hundred too fast. And gets livid about it, Shisui consistently badgers him too which makes the situation even worse.

Of course this girl knows what’s coming; she’s not stupid. No woman is stupid when it comes to garnering the attention of an Uchiha…if you do manage to catch their eye(s); consider yourself lucky. And she’s going to milk it for every ounce it’s worth. Sasuke is also the baby Uchiha, so even as an adult now, he needs and wants a lot of attention. Many years of being doted on by his older brother has spoiled him a bit. And he won’t admit it, ever. It’s like fighting tooth and nail with the neighbor over whose side a single damn weed is growing on. He wants her affections first and without having to make a move, but he’s not lazy or unmotivated. He’s just rather expectant and catered too.

And dear Sasuke; he’s not a romantic man. lol. He’s the tough love kinda of guy, he actually likes to be the one who gets chased, but this girl doesn’t want to go that route, she wants to be hunted like prey. So when she doesn’t fall for his reverse psychology tactic (he tried to leave her hanging one day—just out of the blue and he was so awkward about it, which she found endearing). He gets even more mad! She knows the game all too well and he loathes her for it.

This goes on for several weeks. That push and pull between to stubborn individuals who want nothing more than to feel one another beneath the other, but also are scared of the consequences of getting hurt. It’s a slippery slope. And eventually Sasuke caves, falls right into her lap, I honestly don’t see him making the first move, but he is going to pester her about how she feels about him.

They will spend an afternoon sparring and mildly arguing about this. It’s so damn funny, arguing over who should make the first move. Who does that? Apparently Sasuke. And you know what, she just does it. Does it knowing full well he wasn’t expecting her to.

Pins him to the ground and kisses his lips soft, but deep. Holding his face tenderly as she brushes the hair from his eyes. His cheeks are glazed with pink; and if she hadn’t known any better…there was a shift in his breathing. Which causes her to slip her tongue over his bottom lip.

Yes, this is exactly what Sasuke envisioned. Just all the permission needed to rub his thumb over her clothed heat and make her gasp in his mouth. Each subsequent sound he swallows whole as his courage, and cock, grow beyond magnifying proportions. He doesn’t think or recall a time in his life where he’s ever been this hard.

Quickly, he’s exposed: her lithe fingers mapping and touching every crevice of his aching cock. He groans, even just mere touching he wants to cum. The moment her mouth hits his sensitive flesh; he’s a mess. Gripping her hair and squeezing his legs around her. It doesn’t take long for the familiar feeling of orgasm to barrel from balls to shaft, and he’s not ready. But he can’t stop it.

He’s probably never busted a load this fast or fat, how many minutes was that? Three? Five? He’s almost embarrassed that he’s cumming this fast in her mouth, but how could he not? The way her lips look plump with her wrapped around him. How easily she sucks him into the back of her throat, undulating her mouth and tongue over his shaft. Yea, he’s in heaven and when she hums. That’s when a torrent of his seed pulses down her gullet. Hot and sticky.

From there his cheeks are red; and he gets standoff-ish. Totally, very much Sasuke. Though he’s not a complete ass wipe, once his hearts out of his throat, the favor is more than ten fold reciprocated and by the gods. Nothing, absolutely nothing, is more arousing and ethereal than catching his lazy gaze as he swipes up her slit. Nose, mouth and chin dribbled with her slick, his grip on her waist holding her in place. Sasuke’s been considering this for months, months.

Making her girl brain into mashed potatoes is easy street, 1 2 3. All that cocky and arrogant banter between them was really just covert foreplay, and telling Sasuke how cute it was that he came fast was stupid. Really stupid, since all he has to do is suck on her clit, undoing her with solely his mouth. Nursing off her orgasm until she’s a jittery mess, incapable of sitting up afterwards. Can only stare at the sky, blinking and thinking how to fucking rack her brain around this.

It’s awkward, but just for a brief minute. Hormones aside, he’s lot entirely a touchy feely guy, but doesn’t protest when she wants to sit close to him afterwards under a tree. His dormant emotions take time to develop, to process all this outwardly. Inwardly he’s conveying them perfectly, but how he expresses them is something else.

[spooky-holiday]

KLOKTOBER DAY 12: TATTOOS OR PIERCINGS

I got really unmotivated so I stopped posting for the past few days :[ this drawing is very simple, kinda lazy, I just wanted to post something today lmao

unrelated, but today is my birthday >;-)