#i got blended and turned into a lime cake help me

[ninety-pairs-of-socks]

okay gornite ebryone

[colleenmurphy]

It all started on a very normal evening out for drinks and dinner with her newest beau, a really sweet cop from Chicago that had dreamy blue eyes and a voice that could melt her brain into her shoes.

"So here I am half way down seventh and park just on my beat when I pull up and see this little girl, pigtails in ribbons, backpack too big for her pink sneakers the works. Then it dawns on me that it's the little girl that went missing four hours ago and her parents are frantic..."

Colleen was hanging onto his every word as he sipped his tequila and water and she occasionally drank her white wine. Then she smelled it...or them, rather. A noxious blend of cloying night jasmine and sickly honey mingled with mugwort and cedar capped off by bitter ivy and icy birch. To her it was gag inducing but it soon passed.

"I pull up along side her and ask her if she's lost 'cause she was walking all determined. Kinda like you.."

Biting his lip she resisted the urge to jump him right then and there. It had been many moons since Colleen had felt this spirit in this form. She felt a blush rise high in her cheeks as she drank deeply. Her time in Endor she'd felt it strongly only to be left well into the 1700s until he popped up again. But she digressed and turned her attention again from the annoying smell and back to Bill.

"She answered me with a tiny timid yes and she had these huge green eyes that just struck me and that's what pulled me into the search. I was well out of my way and technically on a different beat entirely. But I'd found her. I introduced myself and let her wear my hat and play with the buttons a little. But I really won her over when I hand delivered her to her mom on their front porch. Made me proud of myself that day. All the shit I did in my life, over there...that was a life away from what I did to get where I am now. I helped someone. I knew I was in the right line of work."

She smiled and again her ancient heart melted. Taking his hand in hers she traced his lifeline. Good and strong mount of Venus. Unbroken.

"You're awfully affection this evening, Col."

She smiled again before leaning over to kiss his cheek.

"It's Friday, I got paid and I'm with one of my all time favorite people."

"Ya mean besides Helene?"

A throaty laugh left him as he shook out a cigarette, something Colleen didn't quite approve of but couldn't fault him on since she herself had her own hand rolled cigarettes of a different variety in her purse. She'd already lit up I the ladies room to get her nerve up to even consider asking him about taking the next step she felt was right in their relationship.

"Yes. What was what drink you were trying to get me to try?"

"Oh it was a margarita...little different than what you're used to, babe. Aren't you Miss Colly Safety usually? You sure you want to mix your wine with liquor?"

Yes, he knew her very well, almost too well. But now was her turn to surprise him.

"I'm feeling a bit wild this evening. We don't have to be up early and we're booked for the Keys tomorrow evening. Helene's going to lose her mind when she sees the rental."

He stopped playing with the raven and triple moon charm on her bracelet.

"What if I told you it wasn't a rental?"

Their waitress came back over in a cloud of spun sugar sweetness of maraschino cherries and presumably spilled cheap vodka and Jasmine.

"Anything else for you two tonight? Dave in the back he can whip up somethin' quick if you've got a drive ahead of you."

"I'll have that margarita thingy..."

"Colleen you've never said 'thingy' in your life...are you sure?"

"Yes, I've had one glass of wine and it was paired with the usual crab cake and salad."

She was logical and practical but Bill had to admit that he was surprised.

"Ok, get your pen out Tammy...a double shot of silver tequila, a shot chambourd and Gran Mariner shaken over ice and garnished with the salt sugar rim and a lime."

A slow blink and a pop of her gum gave it away that Tammy was a touch impressed and jealous of Colleen and her taste in male company. As she walked away Colleen smelled it again. This time her stomach gave a lurch.

"I'll be right back."

"Ok, but the drinks are almost here."

Dashing off as fast as her feet could carry her towards the ladies room she bolted the door and made a fumble for her Tiger's Eye.

'Helene...do you feel it? Is it what I think it is?'

Colleen had been around for a very long time and she had grown to feel that nothing could frighten her these days. Until she felt the twinge of being hunted by whatever...no, whoever was giving off that god awful stench. A twinge of brimstone mingled now until it wafted away as quickly as it had come over. She stood there clutching her Tiger's Eye and shaking out a joint in there other. Slipping it onto her necklace chain she sighed and inhaled. Giving herself a good three minutes before breathing deeply and spraying herself down lightly with whatever was in her purse. Some aquatic and airy. Perfect. Walking back out she met his eyes and he shook head slightly as he chuckled.

"Did I miss something?"

"The other waitresses think there's a skunk out back, Col."

Biting her lip to stifle an equally embarrassed and amused snicker she blushed.

"Whoops..."

"Sorry about the wait...damn skunk must be back out there again by the dumpsters. Here's your drinks and your bill. Ya'll have a wonderful night."

"Cheers, Colly baby."

"Slainte, Liam."

A clink of glasses and a few sips and Colleen was feeling positively giddy. She had sipped from the fountain of youth for the sheer fun of it ( it's slightly carbonated and a tad salty with a tinge of Mangosteen if you really want to know ) and she had the privilege of partying in wine from many courts of many kings and nothing compared to the ambrosia that had graced her palate.

"Holy shit you've never made that sound before."

Opening her eyes she gave him a worried look that shifted to a flush of self awareness and the alcohol hitting her stomach. Liquid courage was starting to hit and she touched her necklace once more.

"Maybe you will...later."

She watched his eyes widen and a wolfish glimmer take hold. If the floor could have opened up she would have thrown herself in head first as she blew him a kiss.

"I said that aloud...hollyhocks and sunflower stalks.."

Cradling her head in her hands for a second she ended up laughing at herself. For the first time in ages. With him.

"You are literally the only person that talks in flowers when they're embarrassed and I love it."

"Only when truly and deeply embarrassed. But, at least I've got a nice little in onto the next subject."

Fiddling with her straw she sipped again. This time she was surprised to find a splash of grapefruit soda hitting her tongue. It was pleasant mind setter.

"I know your feelings on marriage after your divorce with Katherine and you know how my last relationship ended with Jeremy. But what about..

Her mother's voice rang out in her head.

'Every time you look at him you get lost in his eyes. I see what was, what could be and what will be. Just ask him.'

A flurry of activity hit as door the tavern opened in a whirl wind of rain and leaves. Helene's curls sprang out as she came in searching the place.

"Hey!"

Politely walking passed a few other couple she made her way over to their booth by the fish tank.

"I hate to break this up but...I've got bad news and good news. I'm an agent of change right now. Don't know what's got my tongue but this cat showed up and now I can't shut up. I'm too honest. Oooh..tequila!"

Taking a sip she pulled a face.

"Oohh. somebody's gonna feel that in the morning."

Bill chuckled as he finished his and took Colleen's hand.

"Oh, She's been dancing with the devil's lettuce, eh? Ok, here's my shot because she won't be blunt with you. You love her and she loves you. You know her knitty gritty past when it comes to love and you know she's into kinky shit. She's wild for and about you and you her. Colleen's at that age in a witch's life where babies are on the brain. Big time. She sees you she wants babies. Specifically your babies, k? We all know how you both are about walking the aisle again and I really don't know if she can..technically. But...yes, she wants to settle down and have a home with you. Buutt...here's where it turns like mega shit bad. We're being hunted. Someone's out there looking for Col and I and we need to skedaddle on out of here before they find us. I've got Mama Murphy on the case and Pops on it. How fast can you drive or should we let Col do it?"

"The smell!"

Bill to his credit was sitting there stone silent taking it in.

"Yep. So yes, let's get paid here and get to getting 'cause whatever it is is Big Mad and Big Bad. "

Helene wandered of towards the bar to ask about a to go cup of whatever that was that she just drank.

"This is the part where you run screaming for the hills, right?"

Tears had welled up in her eyes, partially from having her bubble burst in a big way. She and everyone that she loved and cared about were being hunted by something so god awful she couldn't put a face to the smell. But it was locked away so deep that could only mean something horrible.

"No...this is where I get you and your best friend, our best of honor, to our new home a bit sooner than expected. Which is good. We'll have time to talk about turning a third guest bedroom into a nursery...or something."

She smiled as she kissed him.

"Hey lovebirds! Let's get a move on, please! Paradise awaits us!"

[astringofmadhousefloozies]

Birthday Sequence

Three friends have their birthday in a month of each other, and the parties get progressively more interesting. Content warnings for coarse language, offscreen sexuality, underage drinking and the consequences thereof.

As always, check my Twisted Wonderland Fanfiction tag for more, let me know if you enjoyed reading, and if you want to chat or ask a question, my askbox is open.

~*~*~*~

"You look great."

Idia made a whine you were certain they could hear in Savannahclaw and put his face in his hands. "Why did no one tell me about the birthday event?"

"I dunno, because we'd all assumed you'd seen everyone else put on the prissy little birthday boy suit and dance around like an idiot while I did an interview, and realized you weren't exempt."

"But why didn't you make Crowley skip me?" He looked ready to cry, so you you got up on tiptoes to kiss his nose and dry his tears, which simply had the opposite effect.

"Because maybe I wanted to see you dressed up pretty for a change?"

He just groaned. "Wasn't the festival enough?"

"Never enough; not with you. I'll make sure me and Ortho are your bodyguards, okay? Now, get out there and pretend they're all in their underwear. I got a present on the table for you. And..."

"And?"

"If you're truly overwhelmed, I'll bring you back here to hide, and get you out of the monkey suit myself."

It took him three seconds to turn a truly absurd shade of pink, and flee out the door of his room. The only thing scarier than a crowd where you're the center of attention is a lover who's relentless in voicing her attraction, if you're a neurotic dweeb with a molten core of self-hatred.

~*~*~*~

He'd relaxed somewhat as the presents went on. After checking with each person if they'd rather he open it now or in private (shuddering every time someone said now, in fear of bad reactions), he'd so far wound up with a super mega deluxe vinyl release of the Moirai's most recent album (despite not owning a record player, but it came with the digital album and lots of feelers so he still liked it very much), piles of sweets, and wouldn't have to pay for the subscriptions on most of his game for at least two years. And, he still had a pile to go through.

"Who's this one?"

"That's me. Go ahead."

He lifted the lid off the box, and took out a little creature, a sofubi toy of transluscent grey plastic painted with pearly stripes and shiny green eyes. "I've never seen this Nyarochi before." He turned it this way and that, a small smile on his lips. "Where'd you get this?"

"I got it blank at that second hand shop you showed me."

"... Blank." You could see the gears turning.

"Why do you think I asked to borrow your airbrush?"

Turning, turning... there we go. "You did this?"

"Yeah, dude. One of a kind, just for you."

He looked back and forth between you and the toy, smile growing. Once finally settled on you, he lit up - literally; his hair let out a bright, sparking burst that left spots in your eyes. You think he might have said thank you, you were too busy reeling from the sweetness of his expression, all directed at you, and little Nyarochi was tucked in his jacket pocket until he finally left for his room, you in tow.

~*~*~*~

"Hey Sam."

"Hey, Yuu. What can I get for you this fine day?"

"I got a list. I'm making something for Lilia. Did you know he's a new year's baby?"

"I did!" Sam scanned the list, only to set it down and raise an eyebrow at you. "I have much of this, and can order almost all the rest. You do know I'm not allowed to sell alcohol to a minor."

"It ain't for me, though. Do you know where I can get it?"

He shuffled around in a drawer before sliding a card across the table. "In Stock Now! The solution to your problem."

It was your turn to raise an eyebrow. "Sam. Does Crowley know you're selling fake IDs?" Your turned it over. "Really, really good fake IDs?"

"Crowley lets me do what I want, because I might stop doing what he wants."

You laughed. "Gross. Alright, I don't know the price, but can I get a discount if I help you stock a few weekends?"

"I'll do layaway just for you, if you come in next week."

~*~*~*~

"Yuu!" Lilia leapt at you, and you swung him around in a hug. "It's so great to have you here! Where's my loot?"

"I got to finish it, let me go a minute."

He did, and watched with interest as you set up from your cooler. You ran a lime around the rim of a glass, and crust it with red salt before filling it with ice.

"Yuuuuuuu. My little darling. You know I'm too young to drink."

"No you're not, dude. it's an open secret, like what happens in that shed behind the gym stays there and you don't get admitted to NRC if you're completely heterosexual." You added the mix to the glass, before tossing in a celery stick and sliding it over to him.

He barked out a laugh and took the glass. "That's true all right." He sipped at it and smiled. "What is it?"

"At home they call it a Caesar. I made up a shitton and I'm leaving you with the recipe, which you have to follow. I figure you liked your tomato juice, so..."

"It is just my taste. Thank you." You'd only blinked, and he'd already finished it and slid the glass back. "More, please."

~*~*~*~

You'd learned two things tonight, of which you'd only dimly suspected one. The first was that Lilia could probably drink the entire school under the table, staff and ghosts included. The second, far more interesting thing, was that when tipsy, Lil talked about his past, and in his past, he truly redefined the meaning of "absolute slut".

Looking like a particularly cute teenybopper had not stopped him from fucking his way through most of the Court of Thorns, and a great deal of the places he'd visited, in ways both inventive and more than occasionally disturbing. You really, really ought to stop him; poor Mal was standing out on the balcony with his fingers in his ears, singing very loudly to drown out the noise, but you were too busy taking notes. Kalim was listening to his fellow Light Music Club member in awe, and Cater had been recording for the past forty five minutes, though you were pretty sure if he uploaded any of this his Magicam account would get permabanned for pornographic content.

"And that's when his sister - fabulous woman, cunt like a ripe fig and she'd start giggling every time you..." he stopped and swirled his empty glass. "Where'd my drink go?"

"You drank it all, dear. There's none left."

"Aww. Why'd I have to share it all." He set his glass down and plucked the half-full one from in front of Silver's sleeping form. "Hey, did I ever tell you what I got up to with his," nodding out towards Malleus,"his grandmother?"

You never found out, as Mal simply bodied him clean across the room before any more could be said.

~*~*~*~

"Vil."

"What."

"Can I borrow your lab equipment?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Why."

"I wanna make perfume."

He brightened. "Finally decided to stop smelling like a haunted house?"

"Vil, I actually pay real money for perfume that smells like a haunted house. I have multiple. Sometimes I layer them, to mix with the natural scent of the haunted house I already live in. And it's not for me, though if this works I might try to make stuff for myself."

He wrinkled his nose at you, somehow not creasing his makeup. "Why should I help you?"

You thought about it, and then shrugged. "Well. Why not?"

"... I hate that I can't argue with that. Come on."

~*~*~*~

You have no idea if the party was sedate because of the relatively few people outside of Diasomnia, or because everyone was scared of potential etiquette breaches. You could not complain either way; parties wore on you as they went on and Idia hadn't tried to leave in fear. Either way, Mal was starting to go from blandly cheerful host to fretful.

"What if there is too much cake? I don't wan't to have to finish it."

"You don't have to, dude. Cake's for sharing."

"When I was young, I was the only person at my party who wasn't a servant. So I would end up eating the entire cake by myself, every time." He stared off into the middle distance. "I don't really like cake."

"That's the single saddest thing I have ever heard in my entire life, holy shit dude."

"Why have a cake then, if you don't like it?" Idia was halfway through his piece. Third piece, actually. You envied his capacity to eat what seemed like his weight in buttercreme and not get nauseous, even if you worried for his pancreas.

"Tradition," Mal said, as if he was explaining the most obvious thing in the world.

"You should have done an ice cream cake, then. You actually like that."

"That is an option?" He paused, eyes full of wonder. "What else can be ice cream?"

You cut in before Malleus could continue down a road of ice-cream-everything. "You know, if you're that worried about leftovers, why not send a wrapped slice with the thank you cards for the gifts? Gets rid of it all so you won't be compelled to eat it ‘til you're sick."

Mal instantly grabbed you. "You are a brilliant, amazing, genius of a person. I'm glad you're my Son of Man and I like you very much."

Idia gave the tinest of coughs, looking towards the poison-coloured flames in the fireplace.

"You are mine too. I like the special case for my Dragon-Kun very much."

"Thought you would." He smiled down at his plate.

"Oh, shit, yeah. Here's mine." You brought the bag out from behind your seat and handed it over; Mal shredding it in his excitement.

"... What is this?" the box inside revealed a set of five amber bottles with screw-on tops.

"Your own special perfume blend. Rose petals from the Heartslabyul garden, blackberries, and the fruit of a blackthorn tree." You leaned back in your seat and struggled not to laugh at your own hideous pun. "I call it Feeling Thorny."

Good thing the box was well padded, because he dropped it in his laughter. Idia, bless his heart, wound up choking on some of the cake and needed an entire glass of water to stop coughing.

"I got the goods!" Lilia and Sebek had returned, the latter glowering at you over the top of a dusty crate as though he'd assumed you'd simply eat his precious prince alive the second his back was turned.

"What's the goods, Lil."

"Well, he's got friends he made here for this party, so I figured I'd crack something open from my stash." He pried the top of the crate with his bare hands, which would have made you need to sit down if you hadn't been already. "Saving this for a special occasion."

"Lilia, there's no need to bring that out for us."

"Nonsense! You deserve it! And this party's too damned slow. A little wine will be just the thing, and this is very light stuff, you'll all be fine."

You doubted that, but still accepted the glass of liquid gold when offered. It smelled sweet and floral, and to your pleasant surprise, did not taste like fermented misery when sipped.

Wait a minute.

"Lil, if I drink the fairy wine, I don't have to go live in the Valley of Thorns forever, do I?"

Malleus, seizing opportunity, sad "Yes" at the same time Lilia said "No" and Lil elbowed Mal in the ribs for it. "I'm not invoking any of our more traditional rules of hospitality. If I must," he said, elbowing Mal again before he could try to weave anything, "Let this be in return for being such wonderful friends to both me and my boy."

"I'll accept it." You sipped more as Silver wandered over and leaned over Idia for a glass himself. Idia simply drained his own to try and distract himself from the proximity of him before the anxiety kicked into high gear. Maybe it would vanish entirely if you got him profoundly drunk, you thought to yourself, but that wasn't something you wanted to try. He had enough issues without his deciding alcoholism was the solution to his problems.

Time to settle down and enjoy the evening. The wine didn't feel like anything, so what could possibly happen?

~*~*~*~

You woke up with a pounding head, your party clothes in disarray, and new and interesting pains. You examined yourself and your surroundings, and let things come back naturally.

Lilia, being very generous with his bottles, to the point of not letting a glass go empty at any point. Malleus sitting with his legs crossed and head in his hands, gazing warmly and not without hunger at a both very animated and disheveled Idia as he talked. You getting up to leave, and sitting right back down because your legs didn't work, so you'd simply...

Simply wound up here in Mal's bed, instead of home. With both of your boys.

The evidence wasn't the best. No telltale soreness, but you had a number of new and interesting bite marks, including one very high on your inner thigh with the dentition clearly showing fangs. Your underwear was in place, even if the tule of your pannier was shredded, so you didn't think you'd done anything more than very heavy petting. And to tell the truth? The idea of having done anything more didn't bother you - truly, there weren't other people you'd rather have done it with - but the idea that you had? And you couldn't recall all the fun details? Agonizing.

You leaned over, holding your head, to brush the hair off of Mal's face. He looked at ease, and had managed to slot himself into his weird pillows, so at least he wouldn't wake up with a crick in his neck.. You checked your boyfriend, clinging to Mal's far side like a lanky blue limpet. On his collarbone, at the spot where you preferred to leave your own marks, was a bite similar to the one on your leg. You had to turn away at the sight; the images it brought to your mind left your flushed and dizzy with want despite your pain. How fun, to learn new and interesting things about yourself.

Idia stirred and sat up. He looked to you, to Mal, to you again. His face had no expression beyond starting to turn rapidly grey and sweaty.

You pointed. "That door."

He nodded once before stumbling off to bed and through the bathroom door, to puke away his hangover.

Alright, next step. You poked at your sleeping friend. "Mal. You alive?"

He opened both eyes, bloodshot with a hair-thin pupil, and started making a noise akin to a base boosted tea kettle up 'til you placed a pillow over his head to shut him up. Fortunately, it worked immediately, he lay where he was like an idiot until adjusting it so the pillow merely blocked the top of his face.

"Yuu. How are you feeling?"

You thought about it. "Like I got run through a laundry press. You?"

He smacked his lips and ran his tongue over his teeth. "My mouth has grown fur."

"Wonderful."

"Light hurts."

"Par for the course."

"I'm not sure what else yet. Where is Shroud?"

Another bout of heaving from Malleus's bathroom answered that thoroughly.

Mal pouted. "Poor thing. He didn't even have that much."

"We all had enough. I'm still remembering bits and pieces."

He reached towards you and grabbed your arm, squeezing. "You are... you..." As much as he struggled for the words, the anxiety in his voice made the meaning clear enough.

"I'm not upset over any of it. I just hate that I don't recall it clearly yet." You extracted your arm from his grasp, and slid off the bed. "I'm gonna get water from the hall bathroom. You want any?"

He smacked his lips again, and smiled, wider than you'd ever seen him do before, specks of blood still crusted in the grooves of his teeth. "I can still taste you on my tongue. I never want it to fade."

"Hhhhhholy shit you need water. Bye." You left to try and hide the wobbling in your legs that wasn't from the hangover.

~*~*~*~

"You."

You stopped, and stared. It took an entire four seconds to realize that the large, half-dressed green bean glaring at you from the doorway was Sebek before he styled his hair in the morning. "You mean like, my name, or just me in general?"

He pointed a finger, hissing out his words. "You finally did it! You evil little minx."

"I didn't, actually, or at least not what you think."

He kept going, trying to keep his voice down. "You've seduced Lord Malleus! And now you're going to try and steal the crown."

What in the actual fuck. And he wasn't done yet. "You cruel temptress! Leading him on just so that you could become a queen our people would detest! My poor lord, at the whims of some-"

"Hey, you jealous there, Zig? You mad you aren't serving him all ways? If you want his dick so bad-"

"Shhhhhhhhh!" He looked over his shoulder, back inside, before glaring back at you. "I couldn't do that in good conscience! Lord Malleus deserves someone who holds only him in their heart. He's not my whole heart, so I wouldn't try. You, you have damn near everyone here wrapped around your fingers! And it's still not enough for you!"

"Sebek! He is my friend. And I give zero fucks about the whole throne thing, just so you know. Why would I want to be a queen? That shit sounds exhausting. And he isn't going to ascend until my great grandkids are in the dirt, so, yanno, shit planning if I tried."

Sebek was trying to think of a rebuttal when a pair of hands squeezed him from behind. "Stop yelling. I'm going to brush my teeth." Silver let go and circled around, dragging his hand along Sebek's waist as he did. "Be ready when I'm back." With that, he walked past you with his small smirk to the bathroom you'd just exited, wearing nothing but one of Sebek's shirts.

You watched the hemline skirting the back of his thighs with entirely too much interest before looking back at Sebek. "God damn, dude."

"Say anything else and I will throw you out the window."

~*~*~*~

Mal had traded his bed for sitting on the floor, braced against the wall by the bathroom. He'd managed to close the drapes against the garish light of morning, and the sounds from beyond the wall had changed from sickness to a running shower as you gave Mal a cup. "Drink up, asshole."

"How am I an asshole?"

"Because it's your birthday we all got drunk at."

"Please blame Lilia for that. Fairy wine is not something humans should start the evening with." He sipped the water and grimaced.

"Taste bad?"

"I forgot I didn't want to put anything else in my mouth after you."

"Mal, no. There won't be a repeat, even if I don't really regret it."

He looked at you with heart about to break. "Why not?"

"It's not fair to either of you! I love you dearly, but I'm not in love with you. I'm in love with him." You sighed. Even as more of last night came back, you realized you may have broken the whole thing beyond repair. "And how would you like it if you saw me running around with someone else? Don't say you wouldn't be jealous. You've got a five mile streak of it."

Mal was silent, before saying very quietly, "I don't mind so much after having him too."

"Yeah, well." You put your head in your hands. "You're sure he didn't jump out the window to hide in his room forever after that?"

Mal knocked againt the door, wincing at the noise. "Idia? You are present? You're alive in there?"

A few moments before that shaky reply of "I'm not sure, check in five minutes."

Mal smiled. "That's promising, is it not?"

"You know I can hear you out there, right?"

"I didn't."

"I can." More silence. "Also, the window doesn't open."

You quirked your mouth. "Is the shower helping? I might need a turn."

"Some."

"Do you want to talk about last night?"

More silence, before a small, "Not yet," as the shower shut off. "Can I borrow a robe? My clothes are wet."

"Go ahead, Idia."

He exited in a cloud of steam and purple-black terrycloth, and simply laid down on the floor, gripping it as if he would fly off.

"Still bad?"

He noded, cheek pressed against the floor. Fresh from the water, his hair was low enough that you could make out the actual hair on his head, each glowing like the finest fiber optic thread.

"Well. I don't think any of us are going to class today. So stay as long as you need to."

"Thank god, I don't want to try those damned stairs until my head's on right." You thought to yourself for a moment. "Is Ortho okay?"

Idia actually managed a smile. "I told him I was thinking of staying over and trying to activate event flags."

It took you a moment to understand the implications of that. "Noooo. This was not your idea."

"Mal wasn't. But. Ummmmm." He held up a hand and wiggled it. "He was there?"

"Your boyfriend is interestingly pliable when someone puts their mouth on him. A trait you both share, actually."

You felt ready to burst into flames. This could not be happening. "So who's idea was you getting under my skirts, Mal? That bruise is going to last weeks."

"Yours, actually. You wouldn't let go of my horns until you were satisfied."

The memory of that, and more, hit you like a transport truck, and you simply laid down and refused to say anything until Lilia burst in, disgustingly chipper and with a platter of burnt toast to chew on until the worst of the hangover was gone.

[monstersandmaw]

Evening to ya, Ghosti✌️😆

Sorry if the wording sounds silly, but I wanted to ask if you know any rituals I could do for the New Years. 🤣 Christmas hasn't been exactly an easy time for me for various reasons and I tend to get the holiday blues pretty bad, and for a long old while New Years has felt very similar. I'm doing my best to feel hopeful and to have some faith for the new year, but it's turning out to be trickier than I anticipated. So I wanted to ask for suggestions as to do anything that could help feeling more hopeful, I dunno. :3

Though feel free to ignore this if you don't have the energy for it. I hope you had delightful holiday however you celebrated!!! 😊💖💖💖💖

Hey anon! (it’s now afternoon here in the UK, and it was morning when I started this! I got a bit carried away). I don’t know that I’m necessarily the right person to ask about this, but here are some ideas of things I’ve found helpful/centring/calming anyway which you could draw from. Other folks, please feel free to chime in with your favourite ways to put the old year to bed and welcome in the new one!

(first of all, I’m sending you lots of virtual ghostli hugs to help drive away those holiday blues. That sucks, and I’m so sorry it’s been so tough for you.)

Here’s a rundown of what’s below, and I’ll put in a ‘keep reading’ so that it’s not an incredibly long post! Some of it is more on the ‘spiritutal’ side of things, and others are just mundane and practical things.

Congratulate yourself on making it through the clusterfuck that was 2020

Make some tea and meditate on what’s been and what you wish for

Go outside, be still, and breathe deeply

Let go of negative events and thoughts by writing them down, then safely burning the paper

Disconnect from social media for a few days (or however long you’re comfortable with)

Start a bullet journal

Write lists of goals for 2021 and then refine/distill them down to 3 manageable objectives

Commit 100% to 6 months of positive change

Pick three dates/months in the year when good things will happen, and make them happen (including growing veg/fruit)

Light a candle on the full moon or New Year

Ok, so, first of all, you’ve made it through this year!! That’s no small accomplishment, given the sheer volume of absolute shite that has been flung at us from all angles, no matter where in the world you live. Celebrate that. Seriously, I’m not being flippant. Take a moment of stillness wherever you are, be ‘present’, and just think about the fact that you’re here, right now, reading this post. Not everyone is here any more for one reason or another, but you did it. Congratulate yourself and celebrate that. Treat yourself to a slice of cake (or something you really enjoy) specifically to celebrate making it through 2020.

Make a cup of tea (try a new blend or recipe perhaps, or stick with your absolute favourite), or make a comforting drink of your choice. As you pour the water into the cup, breathe in the steam and enjoy the scent of it. Try and imbue all the positive things - memories, achievements, moments etc. - that you encountered this year into the tea/drink, and think about them growing in strength as the tea steeps, and envisage them continuing on to next year too. When you drink the tea, you take the positive thoughts into yourself and they become a part of you. You could try it in the morning with a caffeinated drink (if you enjoy those) and let it fuel you for the day, or you could try a herbal tea at night to let the good vibes steep overnight while you rest. Make it part of your daily routine; a private meditation.

Go outside and find a quiet spot somewhere and either stand or sit and just soak up the atmosphere. If there’s a tree nearby, think about the way its roots are planted in the earth, its trunk stands tall, and its branches reach towards the sky. Feel that space inside you. Breathe deeply in and out, visualising your lungs filling to the deepest parts, starting at the bottom. Count to four for each inhale, and six out (or whatever you’re comfortable with, so long as the exhale is longer than the inhale). This will help to still you and calm you.

If you have something fireproof (can just be a ceramic bowl), take a piece of paper and make a moment to write down all the negative things about this year, using a pen that you’re comfortable with. If you’re not one for words, draw pictures. You can make it really beautiful or just scribble it all down - it doesn’t matter. Get that shit out. Look at it for a while and read it through, mentally letting go of each thing as your eyes pass over it, then light one corner (carefully!!!) and let it burn somewhere with good ventilation (a cooker hood is good for that, but outside is better). Visualise all that negativity being swallowed by the universe and let it go. My favourite line from the Seamus Heaney translation of Beowulf comes at Beowulf’s funeral when a Geat woman is singing her grief at his passing to the sky, and there’s the simple sentence: “Heaven swallowed the smoke.” How beautiful is that? The sky swallowed up her grief as she poured it out to the universe. The negativity might take some time to vanish from your life (it’s not going to disappear at the same time as the paper, sadly!), but watching it go can be the first stage of letting things go. I did this last year, and I’m only just letting go of the last things on that list, but it was a start, and it made me feel more at peace. 

Disconnect from social media. I know that with so much more happening online this year out of necessity, we’ve become even more dependant on our phones and computers, and it’s wonderful that we have this chance to connect with people when we can’t see them face to face, but social media can also act as a crucible for negative feelings. People usually post the best or the worst aspects of what’s going on for them or what they care about, so it leads to a skewed view of both the world and of what’s going on amongst our connections. It’s easy to start feeling insignificant next to someone else because of their achievements or their looks etc. and it’s also easy to start to get a bleak outlook when the news is full of terrible stories and people are reacting to it in a volatile and often knee-jerk way. Take some time off - uninstall the apps, or put the limiter setting on, or just step back - for a day, two days, a week, whatever you’re comfortable with. It doesn’t have to be forever. If you use those platforms to talk to people, tell them what you’re doing, and give them another way to reach you if they need. No need to isolate yourself completely!! Think about how you felt before you started it (write it down?) and do the same afterwards, and compare. If it didn’t work for you, then that’s fine too. 

Start a bullet journal! Now is the perfect time to start bullet journaling. I first started this year when I felt like time was slipping through my fingers and my life was out of my control, and it’s really helped me to get a sense of order back. It’s not the magic cure-all for procrastinators and time wasters, trust me, but it can help to organise your mind as well as your day, and keep track of your habits etc. It can be literally whatever tool you need it to be. There’s a trend on social media - particularly Instagram and YouTube - that shows off these gorgeous journals that are basically works of art in themselves, and while it’s absolutely fine to aspire to that if you want to, the essential point of the bullet journal is to be a tool. You can buy print-outs from Etsy if you don’t fancy doing your own spreads. But don’t get completely hung up on pretty spreads and layouts because you won’t use it fully then. If you’ve got ‘new book fear’, like I did, make your own! I literally started my journaling by folding a few pieces of paper over, slapping a few stickers on them to cheer them up, and writing some lists. I didn’t buy a ‘proper’ journal until July 2020 when I’d got the hang of what I wanted out of the tool, and how to use it. I adapted one or two things, and I’ll be changing one or two things for next year, but it was a good way to start.

Here are two ‘minimalist’ journals and styles that I found helpful when setting mine up. They focus on usefulness and practicality, rather than overwhelming, artistic spreads and cutesy designs. I’m about to do a ‘plan with me 2021’ journal video for YouTube, so I’ll put that up when I’ve finished it, in case that’s helpful. 

Elsa Rhae

Pick Up Limes

Write down the things you want to achieve for 2021. These can be more abstract concepts like ‘more organised’ ‘healthier’ ‘start a business’ etc. Then, when you’ve got as many things as you’d ideally love to achieve/accomplish/manifest (don’t hold back at that stage), take another piece of paper and choose a maximum of six from that first lot to focus on, and below that, choose just three absolutely essential things to focus on. Make those your things for 2021.  

Now, this one is a personal one for me, so it may not be applicable at all to you/others, but I’ll share it anyway. For me, I need to make some significant lifestyle changes for my physical and mental health. So, I’ve decided to commit to 6 months of really hard work to bring about those changes. Time is going to pass anyway, from January to June. Six months will come and go anyway. Where will I be in six months’ time? I could be physically and mentally exactly where I am today. That thought is super depressing to me. Or, I could devote 200% focus, commitment, and energy, and bring about those changes, and be the ‘me’ I want to be in six months’ time.

It’s like the adage of ‘given a week to write a speech, it will take you a week, but given a day to write the same speech, it will take you a day’ - your brain will tell you it takes the amount of time that you have at hand to accomplish the task, and that’s simply how long it then takes. Use those three things from the 2021 list above, and commit to making those three things happen.

As an aside, tell someone (whose opinions you value) that you’re going to do this. By telling someone, you’re helping to cement the idea in reality, and you’ve got a support to turn to if it gets rocky, someone to cheer you on, and someone to celebrate with who knew what a struggle and commitment this was to you in the first place. 

Pick three points in the year where good things will happen. Book yourself something nice, save up for something and have it delivered then, or tell yourself that you will have achieved [x] by May, or September, or December. For me, it’s a working draft of my novel, and certain health goals by October, but make it yours, and keep those points fixed in your mind. It will help 2021 not to be one amorphous mass of time, and will give it structure and form. You could also choose to grow something in a pot - lots of vegetables can be grown cheaply from seed in a pot on a windowsill, and you’ll have something tasty to eat at the end of it!!

Here’s a slightly gentler idea to finish with: 

On New Year’s Eve take a moment to yourself, go outside if it’s not raining or too cold etc., light a candle, hold it (safely) in your hands, and be still. It doesn’t have to be exactly at midnight, but it will help your focus if it’s dark. Otherwise, go to a quiet part of the house and turn the lights down so that the candle flame is your focus. As before, think about what you’ve achieved this year, and be honest, not just negative! It’s very easy to say ‘oh I didn’t achieve anything, it all sucks, it was all awful’, when there will be tiny victories tucked away in there, I promise you, even if it was the toughest year of your life. Then think about where you are at the moment, mentally and physically. Acknowledge that state of being. Look at it with honest eyes. This moment is not for anyone else, so you don’t need to colour it one way or another. It’s for you. If you’re finding it hard not to be negative, be neutral. Let those thoughts come and go, and then turn your mind to the future. Mentally feed those negative thoughts into the flame in front of you, one at a time. Say it out loud if that helps, but do what makes you comfortable. Let the light from the flame fill your mind and your heart, and think about your intentions for the new year.  

Tonight (30th Dec) is a full moon, so if that is significant for you, you may wish to do this tonight instead of tomorrow. 

I hope that some of that gives you some inspiration, and I hope that people will chime in with their own new year’s rituals and habits. Be honest with yourself but not harsh, and be positive but not unrealistic. This year has been one hell of a ride, and we’re not done yet... Here in the UK, we’ve got the highest numbers of Covid that we’ve ever had, we’re in the harshest lock down (Tier 4) and can’t visit anyone, and we’re also going through Brexit (which is proving a nightmare for everyone, especially small businesses...).

Control the things you can control, and learn and employ systems to ride out the things that are beyond your influence. And take heart - you have a family of folks on here, all across the world!

[litte-baby-girl]

Tips to make your Food more Spicier

Zesty nourishment was not a piece of my culinary experience growing up, yet when I was acquainted with it further down the road, I was snared. At whatever point I requested nourishment, I went for the fiery decisions. In the event that a dish on a menu had a star or a little chile pepper beside it, that was the dish I needed. I had my cutoff points, nonetheless. I recall when my companions at school went to get grill and got the most sizzling, spiciest kind – the thoughtful that accompanied portions of white bread for coolants. They stayed there eating it while their countenances turned red and sweat spilled out of them. I'm almost certain their lips and tongues were too numb to even think about evening taste the nourishment. That didn't appear to be charming to me. Fiery is acceptable; combustible isn't to such an extent.

Nothing makes me more joyful than cooking with bunches of flavors. Fiery nourishment doesn't really need to be hot. It can simply be stuffed with season, yet hot can be fun, as well. Perhaps hot nourishment is unfamiliar to you or you need to expand your resilience. At the point when I met my significant other, he didn't care for hot nourishment and now his resistance is much higher than mine. Possibly it's not how to eat zesty nourishment that you need to adapt however how to prepare fiery nourishment. How would you make nourishment hot and tasty however not require a fire quencher? How would you offset hot flavors with different tastes, for example, sweet or severe? Here are some useful hints on the most proficient method to prepare hot nourishment.

1. Find out About Different Spices and Cuisines

Making fiery dishes isn't just about dumping hot sauce on your nourishment. There are numerous sorts of flavors and distinctive fiery cooking styles. In Chinese cooking, Szechuan nourishment will in general be hot from bean stew oil and Sichuan peppers. Japanese cooking has fiery toppings, for example, wasabi and shichimi which is a mix of seven flavors including hot red peppers. Some Thai dishes additionally utilize a ton of chiles. South Indian food will in general be spicier than North Indian with heaps of red chiles and dried bean stew powder. Cajun and Creole dishes use flavor mixes with cayenne, paprika and chile peppers while Jamaican nourishment utilizes super-hot scotch hat peppers. Mexican food utilizes hot peppers, for example, habanero and jalapeno.

On the off chance that you intend to prepare fiery nourishment, there are a few flavors and sauces you should have in your storeroom.

Allspice is developed in Jamaica. Its fragrance and taste is warm and sweet. Individuals at times erroneously think it is a mix of flavors since it is like the blend of cinnamon, cloves and nutmeg. Allspice is utilized in Caribbean cooking just as in preparing.

Chile peppers arrive in a wide assortment of warmth levels from gentle ringer peppers to jalapenos to seriously hot habanero and Scotch hood peppers.

Squashed red pepper, otherwise called red chile pieces or red pepper drops, is produced using an assortment of red peppers, for example, ancho, ringer and cayenne. You may know this flavor from the shaker bottles on the tables at Italian eateries and pizza places. Be that as it may, the root of red pepper chips is India. While new chiles have direct warmth and sweetness, dried chile pepper is all the more full-bodied and smoky. Furthermore, hot!

Curry powder is a mix of flavors including cumin, coriander, turmeric, fenugreek and numerous others. There are an assortment of curry powders that vary in flavor and length a wide scope of warmth from gentle to hot. Curry powder is utilized in Indian, Thai and Jamaican nourishment.

Chile powder, which is utilized in Mexican and Latin plans, is likewise a mix of flavors. It contains an assortment of peppers just as garlic, cumin and oregano and can likewise have various degrees of warmth relying upon the mix.

Ginger is utilized in Asian food just as in preparing. It is warm and fiery. You may not consider ginger a hot zest yet a lot of it can consume.

Harissa is a well known hot sauce utilized in Tunisia. It is normally produced using grounded red winged creatures eye stew peppers with olive oil, garlic, cumin and coriander.

Hot sauce, otherwise called stew sauce or pepper sauce alludes to any zesty sauce topping produced using bean stew peppers and different fixings. In the United States, hot sauces are ordinarily produced using bean stew pepper, vinegar and salt. The assortments of peppers that are utilized frequently are cayenne, chipotle, habanero and jalapeno.

Sriracha hot sauce is a customary Thai hot sauce made basically of ground chilies, garlic, vinegar, sugar, and salt. Sriracha is frequently called "chicken sauce" after the most generally sold U.S. brand's name. You can figure out how to make your own right now.

Wasabi is a hot sauce predominantly eaten with sushi and other Asian nourishment. It is a green assortment of Japanese horseradish. You can purchase wasabi in powder, glue and sauce.

2. Start Small

On the off chance that you are new to fiery nourishment, I wouldn't suggest beginning with habanero peppers. Take a stab at adding modest quantities of flavors to your dishes. Keep in mind, you generally include all the more yet you can't take it out once it's in the nourishment. Perhaps the greatest error individuals make with respect to flavors is to include excessively or too much. Test with only each kind of hot zest in turn to check whether you like it and on the off chance that it works for the dish you are making. Flavors should improve the kind of nourishment, not spread it up.

At the point when you are cooking aromatics, for example, onion and garlic for your sauteed greens or pasta dish, include a spot of squashed red pepper to the oil. This Asian Cucumber Avocado Salad has only a touch of cayenne in it to make it zesty. Take a stab at spiking your ketchup with a scramble of hot sauce for a hot kick. Swap out chime peppers in a formula for poblano or jalapeno peppers. Whenever you make macintosh and cheddar or need a cheddar sauce for your nachos, attempt this Spicy Vegan Cheese Sauce. Rather than simply salt, sprinkle some chile powder on your fries like these Spicy Raw Jicama Fries. Appreciate old top picks like Buffalo Tofu Fries with the perfect measure of warmth for you.

3. Increment the Heat Slowly

So you had a go at adding poblano peppers to your paella and you cherished it. That doesn't mean you should hop to habaneros next. At the point when you discover a flavor that you like and can endure, increment the level a tad. Take a stab at utilizing chipotle peppers in adobo sauce, being mindful so as to evacuate the seeds where a large portion of the warmth lies. You can utilize them to make this Chipotle Cashew Cream or this Smoky White Bean and Yellow Pepper Hummus. Add some minced jalapeno to your next dish and afterward attempt a fruity serrano pepper like right now. Attempt this Spicy Eggless Coriander Quiche which has reasonably hot green chiles for heat. Construct your resilience gradually until you discover the warmth level that is directly for you. In the event that you accomplish stir your way up to habanero peppers, attempt these Habanero Kale Chips and these Raw Habanero Pepper Crackers.

4. Serve the Heat as an afterthought

On the off chance that you are worried that your dish will be destroyed on the off chance that you don't care for the flavor or you have to oblige individuals with various tastes and resiliences, as opposed to placing the zest in the dish, serve it as an afterthought. Make fiery salsas, toppings and sauces and let every individual choose for themselves what they need and the amount of it they eat. This Black Bean and Corn Salsa utilizes two … check them, two sorts of tobasco sauce. This Vietnamese Tofu Banh Mi Sandwich is presented with a vegetarian mayo spiked with Sriracha and my Tempeh "Crab" Cakes accompany a Horseradish-Dill Mayo as an afterthought. These Crunchy Couscous Tacos are presented with a Sweet and Spicy Jalapeno Dressing.

5. Equalization the Heat

At the point when you serve something hot, make certain to adjust the warmth in the dish with different flavors that will chill it off. Numerous Mexican and Indian dishes will in general have harsh cream or yogurt just as lime and cilantro which all have cooling impacts. My Indian Curry Potato Latkes are presented with Cucumber Raita to chill them off. In the event that you are making a curry, offset the zest with coconut milk which will likewise include richness as right now Curry with Green Beans, Fried Tofu and Bean Sprouts. These Cajun Quinoa Cakes are presented with a Lemon-Dill-Sriracha Remoulade which is an ideal case of adjusting corrosive, herbs, warmth and smoothness.

6. In Case of Fire

In the event that you eat something that is excessively hot and your mouth is ablaze, water won't help. Have a go at eating a spoon of non-dairy sharp cream or yogurt, or eat a bit of bread, rice or a few saltines. Boring nourishments help assimilate a portion of the capsaicin so make a point to have some close by.

Notice

What's more, shouldn't something be said about the dish? Try not to stress, if it's excessively zesty, there are things you can do to fix it. Include some sharpness by pressing some lemon or lime on it or include something sweet like sugar or agave to adjust the warmth. On the off chance that you have a greater amount of the fixings other than the zest that went into the formula, include them so the level of flavor will diminish. In the event that you can, include coconut milk or other non-dairy milk to the dish. I once made a group of my Southwestern Tofu Scramble and added an abundant excess zest to it. It was truly unappetizing. Rather than tossing it out, I blended a couple of enormous spoonfuls of veggie lover mayo into it and put it in the ice chest. The following day, I had the most heavenly fiery vegetarian "egg" plate of mixed greens ever!

Zesty nourishment is scrumptious and it tends to be fun yet it's far and away superior when you are the one controlling the warmth level. I trust these tips assist you with increasing pressure on your cooking and get you to adore preparing and eating fiery nourishment.

[peacefulwriter88]

Dust to Dust

Chris (The Destroyer) X Curvy WoC

Warnings: M for Mature (SMUT), angst, mentions of violence

Prompt – “A woman’s sexuality is a moving target”

A/N: So…..Seb once again took me off guard after The Destroyer trailer. Like yea he’s trashy…..but does he want to help remedy my ruined panties because I’m ruined. So here this is.

This is also for my girl Saran’s writing challenge – hope you all enjoy!

I may or may not make this a series based off The Civil Wars last studio album.

His hands are sweaty. The moisture falls between the dry, thick callouses that are littered over his palms, and he constantly rubs it on the rough surface of his jeans, trying to calm himself. 250 miles. Six hours. Caked up bloods that’s littered on the right side of his body, the iron taste still lingering on his tongue as he turns down to your house, slowing to find a parking spot on the busy street.

Posh townhomes and houses slowly light up as he drives by with the illusion of a better life.

Your townhome is dark.

He knew it would be. When he texted you earlier, you had said that you had last minute decided to meet up with friends for drinks after your workout but could happily cancel and he had indulged the idea for twenty seconds. But then the ache on the left side of his forehead reminded him that he couldn’t, not in the state he was in so he had said that he’d use the spare time to get in and wait up for you – that you deserved to have a good time with friends. He didn’t need you seeing him like this – wanted to keep up the illusion of all the things he wasn’t. Needed to let the dim autumn twilight fall on the comfortable city suburb, to ignore him as another passerbyer as he tried to make himself human again.

Needed to become the person who wanted to make you proud.

He finds a spot a few yards down from 2278 Quail Lane, the modern townhome that stood like a castle – what had slowly become his refuge over the past few months. This life had always seemed like an illusion to him – how the small patch of green in the front of the yard now covered with oak leaves clashed perfectly with clean brick.  There were still people in the street despite the hour, people getting off work and walking their dogs or running in the blistery evening. He hoped they would ignore him. Needed them to ignore him.

He was already risking too much by coming here, by coming to you.

But he needed the safety of your arms. It was the only way to make himself whole again.

He takes a huge breath, sighing before he turns off the engine of the ‘97 Ford white van. It’s not his, it’s stolen, he’d deal with it in the morning – doubt anyone would miss it until then. It might throw you off – he typically drove a 2009 Ram Truck, but he was also a mechanic and it wasn’t rare that from time to time he’d have a new vehicle, ensuring its safety before returning it to its rightful owner. He hopes you don’t notice, hope he wouldn’t have to add it to the list of lies that he’d have to pile on tonight.

He hated lying to you but it was a means to an end if it meant your safety.

He grabs the large, black duffel bag that’s been sitting by his side from the 250 mile stretch and debates bringing it in. Makes it more dangerous if he does. But he can’t trust it out here, won’t get the sleep he needs if he does. He’ll push it under the bed, he decides, along with the 9 mm that being sitting like an airless weight tucked in the back of his jeans and he sighs as he pulls the key out of the ignition.

Just a night.

It was the first thing he had said when you had invited him over for dinner for the first time, drinking really expensive Italian wine that he was to prideful to admit he enjoyed as you coaxed him up to your room. ‘Just stay the night? Please?’ you had whispered in his arms hours later, both of you wrapped up in post coitus bliss and he had swallowed quickly, not wanting to. Knowing it was already risky being here in the first place. Then you had looked up at him with those tender eyes of yours, that look of ample devotion – two months in and he was dizzy from your spell – and had whispered back ‘A’lright da’rling. Just a night.’

One night had become hundreds.

He wanted hundreds more.

The van door is creaky as he exits the older vehicle, makes his presence known as the sound splices through the air, blending in with city traffic as he throws the bag over the side of his shoulder that is littered with the evidence of his crime.

Can’t think about it now. Just gotta push it down.

He makes it to your stoop easily, making a quick note of the leaves in the gutter. Knows you probably won’t take care of it and doesn’t want it affecting you in the winter and makes a note to make sure to clean it this weekend, maybe Saturday morning after breakfast. He smiles, allowing himself to relax for the first time all day as he digs in his pocket, looking for his keys. The idea of having you make some fancy form of pancakes in nothing but panties and his T-shirt, humming to yourself while he takes care of a simple house task you’d otherwise wave off. He loves knowing that the memory is special just to him, that it’s part of the gift of being in the relationship with you and with the cold, silver key ring finally found, he inserts it into your heavy duty locks, first the top dead bolt, then the second before finally the door. He had them installed the minute he officially asked you to be his girl – wanted to make sure you were safe. That’s all that mattered to him,

He moves in swiftly like a panther, locking the door behind him before leaning against the thick wood, allowing the heavy breath he’s been holding to finally escape.

Step one complete.

He closes his eyes, inhales the way the smell of cinnamon and spices mingle in the air. Those damn air fresheners you get from that fancy store that reminds him of safety and home, an autumn smell you lifted to his nose three Saturdays back as you smiled up at him, beautiful bold eyes drinking him in as you asked for his opinion. He remembers feeling insecure, out of place next to you in the small boutique, feeling the heat of patron eyes on the both of you, the odd couple that you were. You were so clean – make up perfectly molded to your skin, hair pulled up on top of your head in a messy bun. You were wearing jeans and a leather jacket and boots and looked like Abercrombie fall perfection. He still didn’t understand the woman you saw in the mirror when you criticized all those beautiful edges and curves that made you a woman when you didn’t think he noticed. You were beautiful and the memory makes him feel better, the way you had pressed your lips to his unabashedly as you pulled away and murmured you were going to get the scent anyways because you knew he secretly liked it and was too ashamed to admit it.

He takes three deep breaths before he pushes himself of off the door. Time to work. Happy hour with you always lingered longer and you’d probably be hungry when you got home. He’d order something wholesome, pizza or that Thai noodle stuff that he had an affinity for. Yea. He’d do that after he cleaned his fucking mess up.

First is the duffle bag, straight to the second guest bedroom that was never used, only barely when your folks were in town. It was your storage area, where you hid your extra clothes and other random supplies and he could keep it safe here for a while. So he opens the bag, pulls the black gun from out of his of his jeans, evidence of his damaged soul, the few rounds stilling jiggling in his pocket with his change. Pushes it to the bottom of the brittle bills, crisp and pristine and clean before zipping the rest up.

This would take care of the shop. This would take care of you.

His next move is the laundry – he needs to get cleaned, to rid himself of the evidence. The tan, thick hide jacket with the faux fur that hasn’t been brandished with blood is pristine but he knows he needs to clean it, if for his safety of mind. So he throws it aside, for now, he’d take it to the laundry in the morning with your other things. The least he can do. His boots feel heavy and he realizes he left a trail of mud up to the second floor, littering your hard wood floors and fuck he’d need to clean it because that’s not what he wants you to come home to. Next are his jeans, blanketed with more mud, and blood and sweat, and he pulls out his wallet and phone, throws it aside. Grateful it was hidden from the earlier scenes of the day. The thin black jacket comes next, he knows it’s dirty as it’s still wet with Tommy’s blood, and he stuffs it in along with his grey shirt. He throws some of your stuff in, he knows you hate laundry and it’ll be an excuse of why he’s washed a load before finally he takes off his boxers and he’s left butt ass naked throwing a tide pod into the modern machine. It whistles up, he selects a cycle and the water washes the sins away.

Now he needed to wash himself off it.

He finds his phone, on top of his wallet and sends a simple text your way,

Thai or Pizza luv bug? Gonna treat you to dinner and a nice massage tonight

Before he finds the other phone, the one you can never know about and pulls out the sim card, smashes it in. Throws it in the trash he’ll make sure to take out in the morning as the modern one buzzes beside him with your response.

Aren’t I a lucky girl Thai please! Shrimp and medium hot. So excitd to see you, I’ve miissssseeedd yu….

You’re tipsy he can tell, he can guess that fairy like daze that’s on your face as you respond in whatever bar you’re in and he can’t wait to wrap his arms around you, to inhale you, to kiss the vodka and lime off your tongue, to swap it for the bitter taste of copper that’s still infiltrated his taste buds.

He needs the safety of your love.

He makes the call to the restaurant easy, figures it’ll take them thirty minutes to get here and that with any luck, you’ll be home a lot sooner than that.  The he does his final cleansing – the one part that he hates after hits like this.  

Where he’d have to face the truth.

It’s in the form of a shower, the water spraying hot over his skin, over the years of scars and his buzzed hair and face. Washing the blood away from his body, from the scar in which the bullet grazed his forehead. Washing the regret from the bank. He wants to be human again. But he knows what that will require, it will require to think back to 11 a.m. this morning. To Tommy laying limply in his lap as Terri drives away, the sound of gunshots ringing over the buzz of an alarm. To watch the light flash out of Tommy’s eyes because it was a set up, they were fucking framed, again and it feels oddly familiar and scary. He allows thick, salty tears to fall down his face like a waterfall, to not hold back choking up the pain that’s creeped down into his bones. Tommy was one of the few people he had left from the old days.

And now he was dead.

For a few thousand dollars he was fucking dead.

And it was because he was trying so desperately to get out. To be a good man. To be a good man for you.

He’s in there far longer than planned, but by the time he departs he feels better. Able to kick of the way his body has been shaking, clean soap consuming his nostrils, his skin no longer sweaty or sticky from the hours of digging up a hole to place Tommy in. Has a plan to let Tommy’s ma know what happened, knows how to square things off with his crew and to sniff out the fucking mole that he knows keeps jeopardizing them. Jeopardizing his plan to get out for good and to start his life with you.

He wanted to be a whole man for you. To validate all the selfish things he wanted from you, like marriage and a family. And he could only do that if he got clean.

By the time he’s clothed, the cheap sweats he bought off a Walmart rack paired with a simple black t-shirt the doors clicking open and your voice infiltrates the space, high pitched and excited. You’re talking to someone, at first he thinks on the phone but as he listens to your ruffling, your overwhelmed feeling he can tell it’s the delivery boy with dinner. He comes down the stairs just as you sign the receipt, forging his signature and thanking the young boy who’s taking the opportunity to check you out, the way your work dress clings to your breast, the curve of your hips. ‘A woman’s sexuality is a moving target’ he remembered one of his mama’s boyfriends telling him as a child, ‘the right one will always keep you aiming’ and the memory takes him off guard, rippling against his brain as he drinks you in You’re wearing that emerald blue color that pops against your skin, that makes him dizzy and takes pleasure in the delivery boy taking you in, before bashfully turning away as you close and lock the door.

You nearly jump out of your bones when you turn, surprised to see him as he nears but he can see the shift in you, the way your smile widens as you watch him endearingly. You could have any man, any man in the goddamn world, and for some reason the world has granted him to be that man.

“Baby! You’re home early. I thought I’d get the jump on you.”

You smell like honey and vodka, like the first time you both met in a sketchy dark bar and he reveals in the way your hands wrap around him, the aggressive way your lips press against his own. He loves you like this, when you are soft and vulnerable, putting down the tough façade you put up for the world and allow yourself to be you. That you felt safe enough to be who you are with him.

“Wanted to surprise you so I went in early to get home before you.”

He pulls you back with him, one hand firmly on your waist as the other holds the bag of food, both forgotten by the both of you. Instead it’s your velvet lips on top of his own, dominating his as you follow him, your hands running through his hair as you moan into his mouth.

“Thought you were hungry.”

His back hits the open concept kitchen island where he gets rid of this bag on the island, his other hand happily grabbing at your ass. You moan out his name and he pushes his erection into you as you kiss him deeper.

“I’m hungry for you.”

You pull away far enough for to look into your eyes, your irises diluted with lust and that something else that tugs at the back of his heart, reminds him that he’s worthy of more than this piss shit trailer home he grew up in 90 miles south from here.

It’s been three days, the first time since your relationship you’d gone without seeing the other and the tension is palpable in the air between you. It makes him snap as he leans back down into you, mouth dominating your own. You’re both hasty as your hands move to his T-shirt, pulling it over his head as he kisses you deeper, maneuvering to your couch because the bed seems too far away. You fall back on the large, plush cushions before your hands dragging his sweats down, groaning at the site of his erection before your inserting his cock into your mouth. There’s no warning as your nails dig into his ass cheeks, taking him by surprise as your tongue moves up the large vein of his cock slowly and you moan deep and sultry around the hard flesh. He nearly chokes, feels small spurts of pre-cum come up as he looks down at you, at how dirty you look, your bun coming undone as your lashes tickle your cheeks. He doesn’t want to be selfish but it feels good to feel loved by you, to hear your content sounds hum around him and he closes his eyes and throws his head back, erasing the memories of earlier to replace them with this.

Every tainted memory he wants to be full of you.

His leg stiffens, can feel his stomach knot up and he pulls away because he wants to satisfy you, wants to be buried in you and pulls away, causing you to mewl as you pout your lips. He smiles as he bends down and kisses you, deeper, savoring his salty taste mingled with your sweetness, crouching until he’s able to yank you up, causing you to squeal as he takes a seat. You take his cue, neither of you caring that the window blinds were a bit open and that if the neighbors squinted hard enough they could see him spread his legs, watch the way you pull your panties down before straddling him, watching him with those lust filled eyes. Could see the way you slowly fall on top of his cock, mewling as he firmly plants his hands on either side of your hips, carefully helping you until your both full of each other, trembling from the overwhelming sensation. You both look at each other with that same dangerous look of love, he falls into the way your fingers caress over the bullet graze, cup his chin and scratch the gruff of his beard. Falling for you had changed everything for him, wrong to right for the first time in his world and he couldn’t push you away like he planned because of this selfish feeling that was consuming you both.

You deserved better.

“I love you.” he chokes it out, the emotion taking him off guard and he’s blinking back tears he hasn’t realized were captive in his eyes as you smile down at him, leaning into him and kissing him softly.

“I know. I love you too.”

He wasn’t worthy of it but hearing those words nestled him in safety, made him feel complete. You rise high enough to shift before his hips are snapping back into you and you’re moaning his name, head thrown back as your hips take over. He likes the way you look when you ride his cock, not thinking about all the petty insecurities the world has thrown on you but focusing on your pleasure, drinking in your beauty as your body takes him. Your soft and hard and edgy in all the ways he needs and his name is a reverent song on your lips and he has to lean into you as he fucks you harder, his hands sloppily searching for that small bundle of nerves that causes you to scream, he knows letting your neighbors know the power he has over you.

And in between each pass, each look are those promised eight letters, three words that have him unwinding, falling in between that place of who he was and who he is and he feels the tears take over. All the regret of his life, the things he’s always thought he lost that now live within the both of you.

You cum furiously, your arms wrapped around him tightly before he follows, his hips stuttering as he whispers his praises for you. And then there’s the comfortable silence, drinking in each other’s breath as he finds his center again. He doesn’t measure how long you have been in the comfort of each other, instead he focuses on your breath measuring out, the way your hands softly rake through his fine hair – down his exposed back. The soft words you whisper against his scalp, your devotion and love and gratitude that he’s in your life.

These were the moments his mama always told him to capture. The moments he allowed to slip by until it felt too late.

Moments he wanted to keep with you.

Eventually, you both pull away, you insistent on peeing as you pull out of him and you both groan before your giggling about how his cum trails down your legs. He sits in his nakedness, allowing the dark night sky to consume his skin, before he takes a deep breath and pulls his sweats back up, finds his discarded T-shirt. The Thai is still sitting on the island and while you change into something more comfortable, your movement betrayed by the wooden creaks above his heads he pulls out two bowls, dishes out the meal. When you come down its in sweats that mirror his own, an oversized T-shirt that he’s gotten used to you stealing from him as it clings to your body’s curves and a smile as you lean up and kiss him again.

“I love you beautiful.” He whispers when you pull away and you smile and nuzzle his nose.

“I love you too. But I’d love you more if you cleaned up all that mud you caked in!” you tease him as you give his butt a swap before grabbing his bowl and making your way into the living room. It was October and you were on a horror kick and the movie for the evening was a classic – The Shining. He curses himself about the mud, he forgot all about it and follows you to the couch as you turn on the TV.

“I’m sorry honey…..I’ll clean it up when were done. I completely forgot.”

He knows you’re kidding and don’t really care about the mud being tracked into the house as you fall into his side, searching for the movie in your Netflix library as you cuddle into his side. The guilt still lives in his chest though, causes him to tense up and you maneuver enough to look up at him, the teasing glimmer in your eyes now gone. Replaced with the look of love.

“I know baby, I’m just kidding. Relax. It’s your home too and I know you will.”

You always knew the right words to say, always knew how to calm him down. Your hand trails up his thigh, falling into his hardened stomach from years of hard work as you nuzzle your face into his chest. He feels himself relax, to stop the rigid frame he’s in as he wraps an arm around you, places a kiss in your hair, inhaling the lingering smell from the shampoo as he tightens his hold around you.

“You always say that…..but I want to respect what you work so hard for.”

“Baby,” your voice is sterner, giving him that look you always do and he knows the lecture that’s going to come next. “This can be your home too. You spend most nights over here anyways. Most of your things are over here and it’s been a little over a year...”

He wants to peel away because of course he wanted to live with you. But if the people he worked with knew about you, knew about the small piece of heaven he’d cut out for himself where he was no longer Chris the piece of shit from the wrong side of the tracks but Chris your lover, the man that helped fix up around your place and took corny photos with you at arcades and went on romantic picnics with they tried to toughen him up.

By hurting you.

Slicing out all the parts of you that reminded him that humanity wasn’t an illusion.

So he kisses you on your forehead and mumbles,

“I know honey….one day.”

He feels you falling into him as you sigh,

“You say that all the time, but Chris I….I love you. I want you to move in. I don’t know…I like it when you’re here. I feel safe. Makes the place feel like home.”

He closes his eyes, his throat tightening. He knew that. Home was just a metaphor for the safety and warm and nostalgic memories of building a foundation in and that was how he felt about this one. He wanted to continue to build more with you here, wanted to capture you from this moment until you were both old and dying.

But he wasn’t good enough for you.

It was too dangerous.

He was buying time for something he didn’t really think he’d ever own, not long term.

“Me too darling. But…you….I just…”

He can’t find the words and you nod as you kiss his clothed chest, sitting up a bit before you return your attention to the TV, knowing that he’d get defensive, close up all over again if you pushed too hard. So you eat, silently, keeping your eyes focused on the movie. Focusing on dinner. He hated when you closed up like this, and he hated that he was the cause of it. But better this, silent arguments that would dissipate with the morning rays than to never have the pleasure of being in yours arms again.

Still doesn’t break his heart when he sees two tears fall down your face, salty reminders of the selfish man he continued to allow himself to be.

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[consulting-celiac-in-the-tardis]

31 Gluten Free Smoothies and Smoothie Bowls for Summer

New blog post! Now that summer is officially here, healthy smoothies are my kind of gluten free breakfast, lunch, dinner or night time snack! My favorite part about smoothies is how versatile they can be. Don't like bananas? Make a banana-free smoothie using melon or cantaloupe. Have a major sweet tooth? Meet my summer smoothie addiction: a superfood chocolate smoothie bowl (recipe included on point number 16 below!).

To make sure I could share smoothie recipes to fulfill each and every craving, I reached out to the blogosphere and am including delicious smoothie recipes from 27 other food bloggers I know and love. Like all of my recipe roundups, all of the smoothie recipes featured here are gluten free, but many are also free of other food allergens and/or appropriate for a vegan, paleo, keto or anything-in-between diet. So whether you're looking for smoothie recipes for kids, decadent smoothie bowls that will make breakfast feel like dessert or healthy smoothie ideas, this is the smoothie roundup for you!

1. Energy Boosting Red Smoothie (Vegan, Paleo) - Kitchen of Youth

This smoothie is beyond beet-iful...and I'll leave it at that.

2. Chocolate Avocado Date Smoothie (Vegan) - Savory Lotus

Just when I thought avocado couldn't get any more addictive, it appears in chocolate smoothie form.

3. Zucchini Bread Nana Ice Cream (Vegan) - Casey the College Celiac 

If you've never tried adding zucchini to your healthy smoothie, prepare to have your mind (and tastebuds) blown!

Like this post? Tweet me some love by clicking here: "Cool off this summer with one of these 31 delicious and #healthy #glutenfree smoothie (bowl) recipes. Whether you're craving a smoothie that's #vegan, #paleo, #keto or #allergyfriendly, this #healthyrecipe roundup is for you --> http://bit.ly/2scL5GI"

4. Wild Blueberry Ginger Kombucha Smoothie (Vegan) - Food, Pleasure and Health

Kombucha just got a smoothie bowl upgrade!

5. Banana Mango Smoothie Breakfast Bowl - The Forked Spoon

Make sure you use gluten free oats, and you can send your taste buds to a tropical paradise - at least in smoothie form.

6. Raspberry Banana Protein Smoothie Bowl (Dairy Free, Paleo) - Haute & Healthy Living

Once you find a gluten free protein powder that makes your taste buds sing, you'll have everything you need to whip up a delicious protein smoothie recipe like this one.

7. The Best Healthy Green Smoothie Recipe That Tastes Good (Dairy Free) - Jill Conyers

Learning how to make a green monster smoothie that actually tastes delicious can be challenging, but this smoothie recipe is a tasty place to start!

8. 5 Ingredient Brownie Batter Smoothie (Vegan) - Healthy Helper

When a healthy smoothie recipe actually tastes like your favorite gluten free brownies, you know you've found a winner...

9. Peanut Butter Jelly Smoothie (Low Carb, Dairy Free) - Peace, Love and Low Carb

Thanks to vanilla protein powder, your traditional PB&J sandwich just got a protein-packed upgrade.

10. Veggie Loaded Blueberry Pie Smoothie Bowl (Vegan) - Casey the College Celiac 

Pie in smoothie form? Yes please...

11. The Best Power Green Smoothie Recipe (Vegan) - Spaceships and Laser Beams

Is this really the best green smoothie recipe out there? I'll leave that up to you to decide! However, if you've never tried almond butter in a smoothie, this recipe will definitely motivate you to change that ASAP.

Like this post? Tweet me some love by clicking here: "Cool off this summer with one of these 31 delicious and #healthy #glutenfree smoothie (bowl) recipes. Whether you're craving a smoothie that's #vegan, #paleo, #keto or #allergyfriendly, this #healthyrecipe roundup is for you --> http://bit.ly/2scL5GI"

12. Energy Boosting Smoothie with Papaya and Avocado (Vegan) - Happy Foods Tube

I don't know about you, but this looks like sunshine in a smoothie to me!

13. Tofu and Strawberry Smoothie (High Protein, Vegan) - All Nutribullet Recipes 

Tofu just got a deliciously smooth and creamy upgrade.

14. Tahini Banana Smoothie (Dairy Free) - Foodal 

Who would've thunk that tahini could look soooo good in smoothie form?

15. Super Healthy Pomegranate Cranberry Almond Smoothie (Vegan) - Easy Cooking with Molly

Talk about vibrant food! This healthy smoothie is sure to catch any eater's eye.

16. Avocado Banana Smoothie (Vegan) - Curry Trail

Only three simple ingredients separate you from this green monster smoothie!

17. Chocolate Superfood Smoothie Bowl (Vegan) - Casey the College Celiac 

This vegan smoothie bowl may taste like dessert, but this chocolate smoothie is easy to make and loaded with superfoods and hidden veggies.

18. Wild Blueberry Cauliflower Smoothie (Vegan) - Amy Gorin Nutrition

Purple cauliflower has never looked so pretty!

19. Tropical Pineapple Carrot Smoothie (Vegan) - Peas and Crayons

There are a lot of pineapple smoothie recipes out there, but this one looks almost too good to eat. Almost.

20. Funfetti No Cake Protein Smoothie Bowl (Vegan) - A Whisk and Two Wands 

I've never tried using frozen chickpeas in a smoothie bowl, but the drool-worthy photos of this vegan smoothie recipe are making chickpeas sound just crazy (delicious) enough to try!

21. Blueberry Cheesecake Smoothie (Low Carb, Sugar Free) - Graceful Abandon 

Just when you thought cheesecake couldn't get any better, it got a smoothie makeover.

22. Power-Packed Orange Mango Green Smoothie - The Holy Mess

Freshly squeezed orange juice, vanilla protein powder (make sure yours is gluten-free) and creamy avocado ensure that this green smoothie is one heck of a tasty pre or post workout meal. Depending on the protein powder you use, this smoothie can also easily be made vegan, dairy free or paleo.

Like this post? Tweet me some love by clicking here: "Cool off this summer with one of these 31 delicious and #healthy #glutenfree smoothie (bowl) recipes. Whether you're craving a smoothie that's #vegan, #paleo, #keto or #allergyfriendly, this #healthyrecipe roundup is for you --> http://bit.ly/2scL5GI"

23. Chocolate Coconut Strawberry Smoothie (Low Fodmap, Vegan and Paleo Options) - E.A. Stewart

Cacao nibs and unsweetened shredded coconut are the perfect finishing touches for this refreshing chocolate smoothie recipe.

24. Peach Turmeric Smoothie Bowl (Vegan) - The Organic Kitchen

In light of my love of puns, I have to say that this vegan smoothie bowl sounds absolutely peachy!

25. Secretly Healthy S'mores Smoothie Bowl (Vegan Option) - Casey the College Celiac 

Want all the goodness of a s'more with none of the work of setting up a fire? Then this green smoothie bowl loaded with s'mores toppings is exactly what you need!

26. Strawberry Cauliflower Smoothie (Vegan, Paleo) - Katalyst Health

This strawberry smoothie is so tasty, it can convert even cauliflower haters.

27. Immune-Boosting Friendship Smoothie Bowl (Vegan) - Strength and Sunshine 

Whip up a delicious and healthy breakfast-for-two with unique smoothie bowl recipe, which features superfoods like apple cider vinegar, turmeric and ginger.

28. Purple Sweet Potato Smoothie Bowl (Vegan) - Rhian's Recipes 

If you're looking for unique healthy smoothie ideas, this purple sweet potato smoothie has your name all over it.

29. Green Keto Smoothie Recipe with Avocado and Mint (Low Carb) - Low Carb Yum 

If you've never tried using cilantro and lime in a green smoothie, this recipe is exactly what you need.

30. Filling Blueberry Smoothie Bowl (Vegan) - DIY Candy

This blueberry pineapple smoothie recipe consists mainly of fruit, but smoothie toppings like chia seeds will help keep you full and fueled all morning long.

31. Mango Berry Protein Smoothie - Garlic and Zest

Who knew that mangos, berries, (gluten free) protein powder, almond milk and ice would turn into such a dreamy and creamy smoothie when blended together?

Even though I've been whipping up gluten free and vegan smoothies for years now, I'm always looking for new healthy smoothie ideas...and this roundup has definitely added some new recipes to the top of my to-do list, as well as encouraged me to experiment with even more unique smoothie ingredients, like chickpeas and tofu.

Like this post? Tweet me some love by clicking here: "Cool off this summer with one of these 31 delicious and #healthy #glutenfree smoothie (bowl) recipes. Whether you're craving a smoothie that's #vegan, #paleo, #keto or #allergyfriendly, this #healthyrecipe roundup is for you --> http://bit.ly/2scL5GI"

Which smoothie recipe sounds the most drool-worthy to you? Tell me in the comments! via Blogger https://ift.tt/2sfdoFh

[beanjuice-duh]

Where Death Goes

a/n: @midnigtartist drew my headcanon, I’ma write hers Summary: Where does Death go, when he, inevitably, needs a break from the living world. Where does he go...to ease eons of suffering.  Warning: Existential crisis and some themes of insecurities w/c:~2.2k

He didn’t sleep.

However, that didn’t stop Kravitz from looking. It was hard not to look. He saw the sun beamed against Taako’s tranced figure. He hovered cross legged off the ground as his mind wandered into the indiscernible planes of his mind. He wondered where Taako’s mind went, where did Elven minds go to find reprieve? Had Taako been another sort of Elf, the kind Kravitz had known a few times. These silent, fluid beings of impossible beauty and grace, not to say Taako wasn’t impossibly beautiful or graceful. Taako was another completely. Entirely.

He was the closest to human without being human. A gray alignment but somehow vibrant in personality. Witty yet spoke in a slow, dazed like drawl that stuck on words as if preparing his speech as he came to him.

He was beautiful. Even like this, in his real skin. Tired, worn, the world on the shoulders of this small, selfish yet entirely selfless wizard. Kravitz didn’t need to sleep, so he observed.

Usually he kept his eyes closed out of courtesy. Taako’s ego didn’t need to catch Kravitz’s gawking. Kravitz sadly couldn’t help himself, not to day. His eyes skimmed the slightly illuminated outline, the beams of light bounced off the soft freckles that broke the surface across his olive toned skin. They were like dotted stars, constellations waiting to be traced, explored, and marveled at. His blond hair, unnaturally unkempt, out of braid hanging long and low touching the floor with its ends, Kravitz was glad he was relatively timeless. He didn’t think his life before had enough years to spend with Taako. He didn’t have enough time whatever life he had before. He was happy…

Time stood still now.

He could count the moments passing without worry of an end of any sort. He watched with keen vision things he would have missed living. The way dust swirled in as the outside wind drifted inward from the open window. The way the breeze uplifted a few strands of blond hair, swaying like tall grass in a summery field. He could watch Taako breathe… He could wonder aimlessly for hours what was going on in that complex mind of his.

It was such a good thing, Death had no end.

“And I’m done” He stretched phasing out his trance, his body slowly lowered to the ground.

Death had no end, but Taako surely did. “I still don’t know what’s the difference between you doing that and what Magnus and Merle do in the other rooms.” Kravitz mused sitting up on the bed as he fixed his shirt a few times. He completely missed the loop to one of his ties when he felt arms drape over his shoulder and a familiar anchor weigh down his constitution to move.

Taako breathed both knowing but not completely knowing, the effect he did on this shell of a person. “Well first off I don’t snore tha-that’s the important part. Second its faster, third I float, that’s kinda fucking like third level shit right there.” His long ears skimmed the back of Kravitz’s head as Taako nuzzled his face against his thick dreadlocks. “Why are you dressed?”

“I’ve got work.”

“Nah man, Lup and Barry are helping you. You don’t have to do that-that nine-to-five anymore.” Taako knew if he asked, Lup would cover for Kravitz. Taako had no sense of control, no sense of pace or space. Taako lived in a constant reaffirming urgency. As if solidifying the nagging thoughts Kravitz had pushed back into the wasteland of his mind. Taako was not timeless.

The silence was enough for Taako to realize he either said something off or something was off with Kravitz already. His arms slowly retracted as he sat back on his knees on the bed. “You know I only got a bed because it makes cuddling with you easier…” The sleepless elf smirked. “…don’t go” In a moment, the switch flipped, the mask dropped. Taako’s drawl crumbled inward into a small and nervous sound.

“I’ll be back before you and the guys are off on another adventure, I swear love.” Kravitz slowly stood and gave Taako the softest smile. He opened his arms and his cloak appeared over his shoulders and wrapped around him. He strode over to Taako, who at first looked away like a defiant child, then melted into the dark, brown finger tips that gently stroked the line of his jaw. “Soon” Death promised, his ice cold touch, his ice cold voice vanished from this plane  and left the elf in his worse state.

Alone.

Downstairs Merle and Magnus were in the kitchen, Merle propped up and sitting on the shoulder of Magnus who was using oven mits as puppets to pass the time. “What smells like baked Bugbear shit?” Taako’s nose scrunched up. His sour demeanor no doubt a clear indicator to his roommates whatever peace (Kravitz) was with him had just exited the building. He strode over to the oven and lowered the flame without waiting for the answer.

“I’m baking a cake!” Magnus smiled, “A vegan one for Merle.”

“Who knew, eggs are alive!” Merle slapped his hand against his cheek dumbfoundedly. “All this time I was breaking Pan’s word by..,breaking eggs on a pan.” Their smiles dulled when Taako slammed the fridge close after pulling out a bottle of key-lime gogurt and began to chug. “Someone is mad….” Merle whispered to Magnus.

“What should we do?” Magnus blinked, “I’ll ask him” he turned his head and opened his mouth wide. “Taako are you UPSET?”

“Why the fuck would I be you walking meat-muffin.”

“Welp, I tried.” Magnus turned back to the oven, checking on the cake through the little oven window. Merle scaled down Magnus’s back and waddled over to Taako placing a hand on his knee.

“Now, Taako do you need me to cast Calm Emotions on you? You’re acting a little hostile and—“

“CUT IT OUT.” Taako hissed, Merle’s face pallid when suddenly Taako pointed his finger at something…above his head. He looked around and found Magnus was opening the oven. “You’ll ruin the cooking time if you keep opening the oven.” He corrected the large human man then turned to the small dwarvian one. “What did you say, Daddy?”

“Ok, well first, if you consider me your fatherly figure I am immensely proud but please don’t call me the “daddy” thing…I’m pretty hip the kids.” Though he had a small feeling Taako did it mainly because he KNEW it was an uncomfortable slang the kids used these days. “Second…what’s up? Everything ok in Taako land?”

“Well…Taako land was occupied by two, now its just one.” He sighed.

Magnus whipped his head around with a small pout, “what about us?” He was immediately hushed by Merle.

“Kravitz left to do shit, I thought when Lulu and BoringPants took up reaping Kravitz would stick around more but it’s the same as before, maybe worse. He stays for a day or two and leave for I don’t know when. What if its getting longer, what if one day he won’t come back and I’m left alone again and—“ His eyes were glossy, mouth dry from rambling, he was looking away, into the distance into a future he was fabricating in the tormented tornado of his anxious mind. “I just want to know where does he go…and why is it more important than me…I’m Taako…from tv.” He joked. Taako’s voice broke into a small hiccup, then into a silent sob.

When abandonment was all he knew, lies and ulterior motives…it was hard to fathom what Kravitz did. What kept him away…What was going on in that skull of his?

Kravitz returned to his realm. Where the air was stale, the world was just as cold as he was naturally. As he appeared he glanced down at his fingertips. There was no longer a rich stretch of false flesh wrapped over his skeletal form but as he fingered the bones of his forefingers together he could still feel Taako’s skin on them. He could almost feel warm emitting from between his pressed joints, the texture burned into the marrow of his bones.

He pulled his fingers together and couldn’t stand the way the stark white looked. He forced his skin back over his reaper skeleton. Something that never bothered him before. Before, he didn’t care what he looked like on this plane of non-existence he made as a ‘home’ base. Flesh was a disguise, it was a false persona to blend among the people and the living because he was neither a person or alive anymore.

There was no warm to be gained, no age to pass, he was nothing. A still and stolen martyr who’s memories of a time when his heart beat last sounded more like white noise than anything fond. No, fondness now belonged to a pair of jeweled eyes wearing a 2 foot wizard’s hat. Warmth personified was hands running along his chest and lips soaked in ale, pockets heavy with stolen goods including  whatever part of Kravitz that allowed this feeling.

The memory of this feeling…or perhaps he was able to produce this himself. It had been so long since he forced something human out of him. Something Taako pulled out of him naturally. Perhaps it was magic, it was all Taako’s doing and undoing of Kravitz timeless…motionless…loveless days.

“…crap…” he sighed, guilt riding up on his conscience. He had lied to Taako. Work was not the problem, like he had said, Lup and Barry were beyond capable. They made sport and dates out of reaping and left Kravitz with only minimal amounts of work to keep him busy. Something he both loved and hated. More time with Taako was what he loved. What he hated was knowing the more he lingered the more he was falling for whatever madness this was.

Death couldn’t be human. Death couldn’t be alive. Death couldn’t love…Death wasn’t supposed to love or be loved. Now there was no undoing Taako’s trick. Kravitz was changing and it terrified him. He dared to face the white noise that was his pained human life. He dared to face his downfalls and death for the sake of regaining what it was to be alive, to love living properly.

Taako deserved a man who knew how to love. Surely one point in Kravitz’s living life, he loved. His eyes closed, the white noise crackled in his ears as slowly his mind began to shift the channels of his mind searching for a moment, Kravitz had felt love back when he was able to truly appreciate it. When he opened his eyes, the noise was gone and in his space was a gold harp.

He arched an eyebrow, looking over the rather large, imposing instrument with some scrupulous theories of what this could mean. His large hand stroked the smooth, waning arch of the majestic instrument then lightly touched the strings, accidentally plucking a chord.

Kravitz froze. He looked at the lightly trembling string; the soft, resonating sound brought something to his mind. Something he had missed in that split second of wonder.  There was a light, tickling tightness forming at the pit of his chest. Urgent now, he turned and stood by the end of the harp and pulled his hands back. He didn’t consciously think about what he was doing, but his fingers positioned themselves over and began to pluck.

Soft sounds, ethereal and whining in nature filled his once empty space. Thoughts flooded him, the more he played the more the tightness hunkered down in him and made home. He more he played he saw bejeweled eyes. Coy smirks in one instance, soft vulnerable lips pressed to him. Daring hands but timid actions, flushed cheeks pressed to his chest. The sounds brought moments in the sun watching the honeyed tinted glint of the sun bounce off his hair, or warm days by the fire listening to roaring laughter and memories while fingers tucked between and locked in place.

The harp pulled these thoughts from Kravitz. Each pluck of the string ripped Taako from his mind and made him ever present. Every motion from the first to the last, building to something great. Something beautiful as his hands pulled back and struck a final melody that softened and lingered on him.

Love had been there. Perhaps during his living days he had loved once…perhaps he had…just as he had once played the harp in hopes of his future in music. The bard died with his harp, but that did not mean Kravitz died with him. The harp was still here as were the memory of a heart and the swell of love. Kravitz smiled to himself, perhaps the living and the dead could find a middle ground after all. A way to love for all of Taako’s days that remained and after…

As death wondered where his life may go, he noticed a black feather fluttered from above and landed on his harp. “Raven…” He chuckled, “do you know how far Death would go for love?” He inquired, phasing out of this plane, eager to return to Taako.

Where the living waited for death, with arms opened.

[asfeedin]

Turn Vegetable Greens and Herb Scraps Into Flavorful Pestos

[Photograph: Vicky Wasik]

In my old, pre-coronavirus life, I aspired not to waste food, but I’ll admit, I wasted a fair amount anyway. I may have intended to use up the rest of that ginger, or those herbs leftover from that recipe I made a few nights ago, or the bag of limes I was sure I needed for daiquiris that I ended up being too tired to actually make. I may have had noble intentions, but life often got in the way and eventually I’d have to toss my shriveled scraps in the compost.

Today is different. Almost overnight, quarantine living has forced me to become a more efficient home cook. It’s also made it easier to be efficient—I’m home and I’m cooking every meal so I have every opportunity to make the most of what I’ve bought.

As I’ve detailed before, one of the main strategies I’m leaning on at home is what I’m calling “component cooking.” I’m not really following too many fully fleshed-out recipes, but instead am building components: blanched or roasted or pickled vegetables; poached or roasted meats; cooked beans; and condiments aplenty. Then I’m mixing and matching them in as many ways as I can dream up, which keeps meals varied and interesting.

One very easy component we can all make with ingredients we probably have in our fridges are herb sauces in the style of pesto or chimichurri. They’re endlessly variable and versatile.

Fennel-frond pesto. [Photograph: Daniel Gritzer]

Here’s an example: This fennel frond “pesto” I made using the tops of four bulbs of fennel I’d bought. The bulbs themselves ended up in a rich bean stew. The fronds went back in the fridge. In my old life I would have found them there a week later, wilted and yellowing. But in this new existence I actually managed to do something with them before they went bad.

I picked the fronds and got about a quart’s worth. Then I added some garlic cloves, some lemon juice and zest, a dollop of Dijon mustard, and a number of anchovies that almost bordered on being obscene. I topped everything off with a big glug of olive oil and blended it until I had more than two cups of sauce. Was it “pesto”? No, not really, but it had that kind of vibe.

It was bright and herbaceous and salty, and it was great spooned over the fennel and bean stew I made. It also made a really good pasta sauce, and was delicious swirled into fresh ricotta cheese as a snack. It was even better as a dressing for a salad of roasted carrots, fresh parsley, and sliced red onions. I didn’t start out with a plan for how to use it, but it’s been easy to find ways. It would’ve been killer tossed with a plain bowl of beans, but I’m all out now, so I’ll have to try that with whatever herbal concoction and pot of beans I whip up next time.

For one dinner, I tossed sliced roasted carrots, parsley, and red onions with my fennel-frond pesto, then mounded them on top of a potato cake with thinly sliced roasted lamb. This wasn’t a recipe, it was just a creative way to combine components I’d whipped up. [Photograph: Daniel Gritzer]

Here are a few tips for making your own herb sauces with whatever you have on hand, whether during quarantine or any other time.

How to Invent Your Own “Pesto” Sauce

Not every green herb sauce is pesto, but you get the point. [Photograph: Vicky Wasik]

“Pesto” is in quotes here because not every herb purée is a pesto, just like not every soup is chicken noodle. But as a shorthand, it’s probably the most widely understood way to talk about puréed, oil-based herb sauces.

Be Open to “Herbal” Possibilities

[Photograph: Vicky Wasik]

When it comes to choosing herbs to turn into pesto, of course there are the obvious options like basil, parsley, and cilantro, but don’t stop there. Chives, scallions, tarragon, and mint would all be great additions, as are fennel fronds and even carrot tops.

You can lean on softer herbs more fully without worry, like parsley or basil or fennel fronds. Others may be a little too assertive to be the only vegetal component. Woodsy herbs like oregano and sage could be tasty in moderation, but they might come across too aggressively on their own. Ditto for oniony scallions and chives. It of course depends how you use it, but it’s often smart to cut very bold herbs and vegetables with more mild ones. Parsley, spinach, and even kale are all good picks for diluting a more pungent herb’s flavor.

Alternatively, you could go all in on the bolder greens, but then be sure add less of the sauce to your food, or cut it another way (see eggs and nuts below).

One more trick that might come in handy is softening and taming the raw flavor of the greens or herbs by quickly blanching them in boiling water before shocking them in ice water and then puréeing (it even works for basil). You can blanch and blend most any herb or vegetable, but it’s especially useful for tougher, fibrous ones like kale that can seem gritty when processed raw.

Go Nuts (Or Don’t)

Mortar and pestle not required. [Photograph: Vicky Wasik]

True Genovese pesto wouldn’t be pesto without pine nuts, and while you certainly don’t need nuts for a flavorful herb sauce, they’re an ingredient worth considering for their fatty richness and thickening abilities.

If you do add nuts, there’s no need to limit yourself to pine nuts. Pistachios, almonds, cashews, walnuts, pecans, and more can work well. One thing to remember is that roasted nuts tend to be drier and may not blend up quite as smoothly as plump raw ones do.

Cheese Ain’t a Bad Idea

[Photograph: Vicky Wasik]

Once again, classic Genovese pesto serves as a template and its inclusion of finely grated hard cheeses like Pecorino and Parmigiano-Reggiano is another option worth considering. Cheeses add yet more richness and fattiness, but they also add complexity and their own form of tang, thanks to their lactic acid content.

Must you add cheese? No. But you probably won’t regret it either. If you do, it’s better to stick to harder grating cheese like Parm, though you may be able to purée in a soft and spreadable cheese like chèvre with good results. Just skip the semi-soft ones like cheddar and the soft-rind ones like brie.

Don’t Sleep on Eggs

Pesto, pesto, pesto. I know, enough with the pesto. So let’s look at another Italian classic: salsa verde from the Northwestern region of Piedmont. It’s a parsley-based sauce that’s served with many things, including bollito misto, a feast of boiled meats.

There’s a lot that’s great about salsa verde, from its salty and herbal capers to briny, funky anchovies. But perhaps coolest of all is the hard-boiled egg that often gets blended in. Sure, it gives the sauce a subtle eggy quality, but it’s not obvious and I’d wager most blind tasters wouldn’t pick it out. What it really does is help thicken and emulsify the sauce for creamier results.

Punch Up the Flavor

[Photograph: Vicky Wasik]

There’s no way to list all the ingredients one might decide to add to a sauce like this, so I’ll just rattle off a bunch off the top of my head. I’m sure you can think of more.

Citrus juice and zest (in particular, lemons and limes)

Capers and caper berries

Olives

Anchovies and tuna, or even a splash of fish sauce

Spices (black pepper, coriander seed, cumin, fennel, etc.)

Garlic and other alliums like shallots

Mustard

Chili peppers (fresh, dried, pastes, or pickled)

Some fresh or roasted tomatoes or bell peppers or rehydrated dried peppers (see romesco and pesto alla Trapanese for ideas)

Ginger

Watch Out for Acid

Acid in the form of lemon juice or vinegar can brighten up a bright green oil-based sauce. I added lemon juice in the fennel frond pesto I made. Do watch out, though, because heavier doses of acidic ingredients can turn bright green vegetables a duller army-green color, and you may lose some of that vibrant, fresh green flavor too.

Speaking of Oil

Olive oil is the real star in these sauces, its grassy green flavor pairing perfectly with whatever herbs and vegetables you’re using in your sauce. But if you don’t have olive oil, a fresh neutral oil (read: don’t use that old sticky bottle you’ve been slowly drawing down for months) like canola, grape seed, or vegetable oil can all work. They won’t add much flavor of their own to the sauce, but if you add enough other flavorful ingredients, that’s just fine.

Get Creative

Sicilian Trapanese pesto has tomatoes mashed in. It’s still a type of pesto! [Photograph: Vicky Wasik]

Don’t be afraid to experiment. Have an eggplant you don’t know what to do with? Maybe roast it, scoop out the flesh, and mash that into your pureed herb sauce as well. It will be a totally different creation, but… why not?

Wondering if some green tomatillos might find a home in your sauce? Well it works in Mexico, so there’s a decent chance you’ll come up with something good.

Point is, take the time to look through your fridge and pantry, think about what you have and what it might taste like as part of your sauce. Really try to imagine the flavors and textures and how they might go together. You have better instincts than you may suspect, so take the risk. You may stumble on a genius idea.

It’s Okay to Use a Blender

I have a history of blathering on and on about the wonders of the mortar and pestle, and I believe it as much today as I always have. But I’m also a very pragmatic cook, and it’s important to remember that we’re not always trying to create the absolute best-possible thing. Often all we really need is something tasty that we can use to make our meals more pleasurable while using up ingredients that might otherwise go to waste. If using a blender is the difference between you actually doing it and just thinking about it, please plug that sucker in and blend away.

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Tags: Flavorful, Greens, Herb, Pestos, Scraps, Turn, vegetable

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[wineanddinosaur]

We Asked 16 Beer Pros: What’s the Most Unforgettable Beer You Ever Had?

Some beers are simply unforgettable. They might not necessarily be the best, rarest, or most profound you’ve ever tasted, but they stay with you. They capture a moment, reminding you of special times or people in your life.

We asked 16 beer professionals, from brewers to label artists to Instagrammers, to share their most memorable beers from the past.

“For me it would have to be a tall thin glass of super fresh Herold Pilsner right from the source. Thirteen years ago, I got to travel with the patriarch of modern beer journalism, Michael Jackson, to do a collaboration and some tasting events alongside him. Herold Pilsner is a brand of beer made in Herold Březnice Castle Brewery, a small brewery in Březnice, a small town 60 kilometers south of Prague. I vividly remember we had an afternoon off and so we sat around the brewery sipping this grassy-spicy pilsner and talking more about American jazz and English rugby than our day jobs as a writer and a brewer. R.I.P. Michael Jackson. As the OG craft beer evangelist, Michael was an evocative storyteller and a serious historian and he is surely the single most responsible person for the global craft-beer renaissance we are all enjoying today.” — Sam Calagione, Founder and CEO, Dogfish Head Craft Brewery

“One of my most memorable beers would have to be Bitches Brew by Dogfish Head. When I initially started drinking craft beer, I kind of closed myself into this box. I thought I only liked pale ales or IPAs. I avoided stouts because they seemed so heavy, and pilsners were boring to me at the time. I started working for Dogfish in 2015 and began exploring more flavors. I decided I had to get rid of this preconceived idea that I wasn’t going to like something I hadn’t even tried. That’s when I drank Bitches Brew for the first time and fell in love with its delicious and complex blend of mild fruit, coffee, bittersweet dark chocolate, honey, and its dry finish. Also, who wouldn’t love a Miles Davis tribute beer? Bitches Brew spiraled me into my new love for dark beers, and inspired me to expand my palate. Nowadays I will pretty much try any style of beer you place in front of me — and I mostly have Bitches Brew to thank for that.” — Megan Stone, Brewer, Modern Times Beer

“On my first visit to Belgium in May of 2000, on one of New Belgium’s fifth anniversary trips, we visited Brouwerij Boon. I was so excited. We were going to be toured by Frank Boon — it was like meeting your rock hero. I cannot remember one moment of the tour; my heart was racing, my palms were sweaty, I was dizzy and kept thinking, ‘Don’t lock your knees and keep smiling.’ When the tour was over, Frank (I call him Frank at this point) suggested we walk down the street to a café to have a few beers. When we sat down, I was right near him and he suggested we split a bottle of Oud Kriek Marriage Parfait. To this moment, I can see the navy of Frank’s sweater and pink beer’s hue, hear the pop, smell the bouquet, taste the tart, and feel the effervescence. It is a forever moment. And is one of my favorite beers.” — Lauren Woods Limbach, Wood Cellar Director and Blender, New Belgium Brewing

”Early in the process of purchasing our building, the then-owner was nice enough to give us a bottle of Samuel Adams Triple Bock (1994) that he had been cellaring since its release… We decided to open the bottle once we finalized the purchase. Well, that process was long and trying, so opening that bottle was a sweet celebration. A beer brewed well before we were old enough to drink it, by pioneers of craft beer, christening our journey on a trail they blazed.” — Tommy Kennedy, Owner, HOMES Brewery

“The first time I was able to try a bottle of 3 Fonteinen Oude Gueuze, my impression of what beer was and what it could be dramatically shifted. At the time, I was predominantly a wine drinker and worked in the wine industry. That beer helped promote a shift. Its ability to so clearly represent a place, the delicate balance yet explosive character, the absolutely unique and uniquely delightful aroma and flavor, and the clear display of mastery in working with a few simple ingredients in a specific location; it inspired me to further explore truly wild beverages and beer, and ultimately to work with my wife to open our brewery years later.” — Trevor Rogers, Co-Founder and Head Brewer, de Garde Brewing

“The last very memorable beer I drank was an ESB in a little brewpub in Ohio. It was the perfect pour on a cold night after a long day spent in airports. The beer was a gorgeous example of the style and I paired it with a plate of authentic pierogies and sausage. It was one of those nearly perfect moments you find at quiet corners of the bar from time to time.” — Dr. J. Nikol Jackson-Beckham, Diversity Ambassador, Brewers Association

“The most memorable beer that I’ve ever drank is Jean Chris Nomad by Cantillon. I’ve had my fair share of Cantillon beer, new and old, but what stood out about this one was its tantalizing wine character. It will likely forever be in my top five lambic beers of all time. This is one of those lambic ghosts that not many have tried but my friend Sean had our buddy Rob and myself over and casually pulled it out and surprised us. I won’t ever forget that.” — Roman Estareja, Beer Instagrammer, @theyoungcraftenthusiast

“During a family gathering at my parents’ house, after everyone went inside for cake, I was once able to steal a bottle of Miller High Life from the back patio table, sneaking it up into the treehouse in the corner of the yard behind the shed. Looking down on the house below, while relatives milled about, I drank the beer with little ceremony and enjoyed the feeling of being completely alone up there — the feeling that no one could tell where I was, or what I was doing.” — Jason Synan, Co-Owner and Head Brewer, Hudson Valley Brewery

“The most memorable beer I’ve had recently would have to be one of the two imperial stouts we released in celebration of our fifth anniversary, All 5th Anniversary Everything. Each had different adjuncts, my favorite being the one made with wild Thai banana, cinnamon, coconut, toasted coconut, vanilla, and macadamia nuts. It was the first banana beer that I actually found delicious, with an amazing texture and rich flavor. It almost reminded me of banana bread.” — Geriz Ramirez, General Manager, Other Half Brewing

“One of my most memorable beer moments was the first sip of Surly Brewing’s Todd The Axe Man IPA after I successfully defended my doctoral dissertation. I’ve had this beer several times prior, but that first sip in my new Dr. BeerCat pint glass, a commemorative gift from my lab mates, after my defense, was incredibly satisfying. Every time I smell the citrus aromas and taste that tropical hoppy bitterness, I remember what I’ve accomplished, and the family, friends, and colleagues present that day who supported me throughout graduate school.” — Caroline Campion, Co-Founder, CatsOnTap

“One of my first great drinking experiences was in Germany when I was hanging out with my mother at a beer garden. I drank a Hofbräu Dunkel, which was my first experience with dark lager. Most people in America have an association with lager as the light macro beers that they find everywhere. This beer inspired the first beer that I wrote a recipe for. Plus I really appreciated the environment of the beer garden, the atmosphere, and the culture of beer. What was also really memorable was the look on my mother’s face when she saw the liter stein being served to me, and even more so when I ordered another one five minutes later.” — Jack Hendler, Co-Owner and Brewer, Jack’s Abby Craft Lager

“When we travel to Belgium, our first stop is always Cantillon. I always start, and pretty much stick with, their Gueuze. On one particular visit, owner Jean Van Roy treated us to a very old bottle of Gueuze made by his dad, Jean Pierre, in the late 1970s. It was the last year they used artificial sweeteners to make their very sour beer sweeter and more palatable for consumers. The bottle was appropriately covered with dust and cobwebs, and the Gueuze tasted like burnt marshmallows. Drinking this beer with Jean and my husband, Vinnie, at Cantillon was one of the most memorable beer drinking experiences of my life!” — Natalie Cilurzo, Co-Owner and President, Russian River Brewing Company

“One of the strangest, yet enjoyable, beer experiences I’ve had was at a Beachwood BBQ’s annual Sour Fest back in 2015. During the middle of the chaos, I managed to snag a glass of Sauer Power, a collaboration between Freigeist Bierkultur and Jester King Brewery. Up to that point I couldn’t remember having anything like it, tart and smoky, as if someone had slow-smoked stone fruit for 15 hours. It definitely wasn’t for everyone, but holy hell did that beer leave a lasting impression on those of us who had it that day.” — Vito Trautz, Marketing Brand Manager, Brouwerij West

“Everyone has their ‘gateway’ beer — that brew that turned their head, made them realize that beer was much more than the commercialized bullshit we grew up to know. No offense to the Corona with the lime wedge I knew in my early 20s, or the artificially colored and flavored malt liquor I choked down on the assumption it was impressive to do so… It was Epic Brewing’s Big Bad Baptist, an imperial stout that uses roasted coffee — the cupid, if you will, that caught my attention. I’ve been a heavy consumer of coffee since my teen years, and this big, bad beer gave me just what I never knew I needed. It occurred to me that I just hadn’t met the right brew until then. Living in Maine, winters are long and challenging, with ridiculously short days, just the right formula for a warm fire and a heavy stout. I found comfort in this, and started to hone my palate, seeking new styles to try, with an open mind, stepping through that portal into the amazing world of craft beer.” — Heidi Geist, Founder, The 48 Beer Project

“One beer that comes to mind was a beer I’d had in my cellar for several months, Allagash Midnight Brett. As I was getting ready to move back from Portland, Ore., to northern Vermont, probably late 2014, I was trying to work through some of the beers I had piled up. I’ve always had a huge amount of respect for Allagash, though didn’t have any real expectations for this beer. As the name implies, it’s a dark brettanomyces beer, which isn’t really a go-to for me. But, the thing that stood out for me was the sensation of the carbonation. The way this beer rolled across my tongue can be described like the last bit of an ocean wave, reaching as far as it can into the beach until the foam crackles and sinks into the sand. It sent an intense meridian response blossoming out of my brain and tingling down my spine… It was one of the coolest beers I had in a long time and sent waves of pleasure ringing through me. I’ve had it again, as well as many beers since, yet haven’t found that perfect carbonation again. It was like Champagne carbonation without the sweetness or degree of alcohol to it. Just talking about it makes me feel it in my body.” — Vasili Gletsos, Owner and Brewer, Wunderkammer Bier

“This question was oddly harder than I thought it would be… I have always seen beer as a catalyst to adventure; whether it’s on the palate, a bar stool, or an Instagram message from a homebrewer on the other side of the planet. My most memorable beer was on a backpacking trip with my husband over Thanksgiving. We decided to forego the pressures of the holiday and get into the middle of the Mendocino National Forest. We got lost on the way out there detouring around downed trees and closed roads and then nearly stuck in deep snow but eventually made it to the trailhead. We hiked in and set up camp next to this crystal clear, freezing steam and made a makeshift rock ‘refrigerator’ in it. That night we made a fire, ate some MREs, and opened a Russian River Framboise For A Cure. Although I have always loved this beer, the combination of the quest to get there, the effort to pack it in, how it was perfectly cooled by the creek, sitting under the stars with my husband and dog in the middle of nowhere; a beer has never tasted so good.” — Mikaelaa Crist, Beer Instagrammer, @craftybeermaven

The article We Asked 16 Beer Pros: What’s the Most Unforgettable Beer You Ever Had? appeared first on VinePair.

source https://vinepair.com/articles/16-brewers-most-memorable-beer/

[agendahammer79-blog]

Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

[If you love Thai spices, you’ll adore this dip. Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip is sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free and low glycemic. Suitable for all stages on an anti-candida diet.]

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

Although I love to travel, I tend not to do it so much. The HH and I do love a little junket, mind you, but haven’t really taken one of those epic “across-Europe” or “to Bali and back” or “let’s-explore-the-fjords-of-Iceland” kind of trips. (Our one big adventure happened way back when we were first together, when we spent 10 glorious days in Newfoundland, strolling through untouched forests, staying and rustic B&Bs, spotting moose wandering off the highways, or whale-watching on the ocean**).

These days, we’re more likely to take a few days here, a few days there, and chillax at a resort up north by the pool. It’s all good.

But back in the days BHH (“before the HH”), I did venture on a major trip by myself to England, to visit my dear friend Sterlin.

At that time, Sterlin had just  wrapped up one job and was staying at home for the interim before the next job began. We timed my visit to coincide with her free days. It was epic!

Besides being eternally besotted by the English accent (or, more correctly, accentS, since every 2 blocks or so, it seemed to change), I was, of course, dumbstruck by the history, the regal architecture, the small-yet-intimate feel to the towns, the culture that permeated every nook and cranny (and there were quite a few crannies, as I recall).

In my short 10 days in the country, we managed to visit London (three times), Stratford, Nottingham, Cambridge, Oxford, and a slew of other smaller spots that escape me now. I loved the historic architecture of the cities, the museums that seemed to be on every corner, pristine fields and hills out in the rural countryside, and the ingrained history in every cobblestone.

I learned about university students’ secret codes, “public” vs private schools, the true history of Robin Hood, and how taxi drivers had over 2 years of school just to memorize the labrynthine streets of the city. Everyone I met from the clerk in the grocery store to the neighbor walking her dog to Sterlin’s work colleagues all seemed possess a magical air of elegance and gravity about them, simply by virtue of having been born in that country.

Now, as I’ve mentioned before, Sterlin was not known for her culinary prowess. Nevertheless, she determined that she’d prepare a homecooked meal for meal at least once during my stay (as it turned out, she managed that feat twice in the ten days!).  Along with Date Pasta, another of her newfound staples was a Green Curry stew, made with chicken (still on regular rotation on my plate in those days) and a slew of vegetables enrobed in a rich, glossy coconut milk base and spiced with fragrant Thai green curry paste.

I was hooked immediately, demanded the recipe, and promptly made the dish as soon as I got back to North America. I’ve been a fan of all things Thai ever since.

My version of the dip. The HH and I devoured this in short order!

This Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip from Brandi Doming’s new cookbook, The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less may not be a stew, but just like a classic Thai recipe, its marriage of sweet, salty and spicy–with the tiniest hint of sour from the lemon and bitter from the almond butter–it will win you over with the first taste.

Both the HH and I LOVED this dip. Like, loved-so-much-I-wanted-to-kiss-it. Or loved-so-much-I-didn’t-bother-with-crackers-and-just-ate-it-off-a-spoon. And also, loved-so-much-I-would-adopt-it-if-I-could. Yeah. Loved-so-much-that-Chaser-got-jealous. THAT much. The HH said, “You really should make this again. This is delicious. Definitely make this again. . . ” all the while stuffing his face with dip-coated nacho chips.

Anyone who follows plant-based bloggers is likely already familiar with Brandi and her signature “8 ingredients or less” oil-free recipes.  I was excited to see that many of the recipes were also gluten-free and free of refined sugars, too, so they would be suitable for a diet like mine.

Along with stunning photos and recipes, the book also provides a full chapter on “The Vegan 8 Kitchen,” (with everything from “Getting Started” to baking tips, Brandi’s pantry staples, seasonings, sweeteners, nut butters and other natural fats, flours, starches and other kitchen equipment), plus individual chapters on “Breakfast,” “Scrumptious Snacks & Appetizers,” “Time-Crunch Lunches,” “Sauces and Dressings,” “Easy Entrees,” “Comforting Soups & Stews,” “Sides & Dips,” “Crowd-Pleasing Desserts,” and “Staples” (like    spaghetti sauce, BBQ sauce, spice blends or homemade nut milks). There’s also a full chart of Imperial-to-metric equivalents.

Some of the recipes I can’t wait to try include Bakery-Style Blueberry Muffins, Spice-is-Nice Baked Oatmeal Squares, Sunflower-Cinnamon Chia Balls, Creamy Lemon and Garlic White Bean Crostini, 20-Minute Alfredo, Mexican Tahini Chickpeas, BBQ Chipotle Green Lentils with Potato Wedges, “My Favorite” Savory Meatless Bean Balls, Teriyaki Patties, Ultimate Broccoli-Cheese Soup, Hungarian Red Lentil Soup, Sweet Potato Cornbread and No-Bake Chocolate Espresso Fudge Cake–plus about 50 more!

Brandi and her publisher graciously allowed me to share the Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip here. Do give this one a try–it’s truly tantalizing and keeps nicely in the fridge. Just be warned: this dip likely won’t last very long.

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

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Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

reprinted with permission from The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less by Brandi Doming. Published by Oxmoor House.

Brandi says: “If there was ever a dip that won over taste testers, this is it! One of my tricks for super-creamy bean dips is to use white beans, which create a really smooth dip—a big help for oil-free recipes. This dip is creamy like a hummus with bold Thai curry flavors that complement the sweet potato beautifully. With the garnishes, it makes a lovely presentation for a gathering.”

1 packed cup (248g) cooked, mashed sweet potato 1 (15-ounce) can white cannellini beans, drained and rinsed, or 1 1⁄2 cups cooked white beans (255g) 2 tablespoons (30 ml) fresh lime juice 2 tablespoons (30 ml) roasted smooth almond butter 2 tablespoons (30 ml) low-sodium soy sauce [I used Braggs aminos] 1⁄4 cup (60 ml) Thai red curry paste [I used Thai Kitchen] 1 teaspoon (5 ml) dried basil 1⁄2 teaspoon (2.5 ml) ground coriander 1⁄4 teaspoon (1 ml) fine salt Optional: roasted sliced almonds, fresh chopped basil for garnish; crackers, chips, or sliced vegetables for serving

Add the mashed sweet potato, beans, lime juice, almond butter, soy sauce, 2 tablespoons (30g) hot water, curry paste, basil, coriander, and salt to a food processor; process for 3 to 4 minutes or until very smooth. Scrape the sides and process again. Taste and add more salt, if desired. Garnish with almonds and basil, if desired, and serve with chips, crackers, or assorted sliced vegetables. Makes about 3 cups (720 ml).

Nutrition per 1⁄2 cup: 151 calories | 3g fat | 6.8g protein | 24.7g carbs | 5.4g fiber | 3.8g sugar | 704mg sodium

NOTE: Bake the sweet potato at 400°F (200°C) for 45 minutes to an hour until very soft. I would advise against steaming or boiling, as it will add extra water to the potatoes and dilute the flavor. Peel and mash 1 cup (248g) of the cooked potatoes. The roasted almond butter is slightly sweet, which complements the spicy curry flavor well, but if you’re allergic, you can sub with tahini for a slightly different flavor profile than the original recipe.

Suitable for: ACD All stages (if you use an ACD-safe red curry paste); refined sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free, vegan, low glycemic.

Disclosure: Links in this post may be affiliate links. If you choose to purchase using those links, at no cost to you, I will receive a small percentage of the sale.

Subscribe for recipes and more about living well without sugar, gluten, eggs or dairy! Click here to subscribe to RickiHeller.com via email. You’ll receive emails sharing recipes and videos as soon as they’re posted, plus weekly updates and news about upcoming events. A healthy lifestyle CAN be sweet!

Source: https://www.rickiheller.com/2018/10/thai-red-curry-sweet-potato-dip/

[studyshrine7-blog]

Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

[If you love Thai spices, you’ll adore this dip. Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip is sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free and low glycemic. Suitable for all stages on an anti-candida diet.]

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

Although I love to travel, I tend not to do it so much. The HH and I do love a little junket, mind you, but haven’t really taken one of those epic “across-Europe” or “to Bali and back” or “let’s-explore-the-fjords-of-Iceland” kind of trips. (Our one big adventure happened way back when we were first together, when we spent 10 glorious days in Newfoundland, strolling through untouched forests, staying and rustic B&Bs, spotting moose wandering off the highways, or whale-watching on the ocean**).

These days, we’re more likely to take a few days here, a few days there, and chillax at a resort up north by the pool. It’s all good.

But back in the days BHH (“before the HH”), I did venture on a major trip by myself to England, to visit my dear friend Sterlin.

At that time, Sterlin had just  wrapped up one job and was staying at home for the interim before the next job began. We timed my visit to coincide with her free days. It was epic!

Besides being eternally besotted by the English accent (or, more correctly, accentS, since every 2 blocks or so, it seemed to change), I was, of course, dumbstruck by the history, the regal architecture, the small-yet-intimate feel to the towns, the culture that permeated every nook and cranny (and there were quite a few crannies, as I recall).

In my short 10 days in the country, we managed to visit London (three times), Stratford, Nottingham, Cambridge, Oxford, and a slew of other smaller spots that escape me now. I loved the historic architecture of the cities, the museums that seemed to be on every corner, pristine fields and hills out in the rural countryside, and the ingrained history in every cobblestone.

I learned about university students’ secret codes, “public” vs private schools, the true history of Robin Hood, and how taxi drivers had over 2 years of school just to memorize the labrynthine streets of the city. Everyone I met from the clerk in the grocery store to the neighbor walking her dog to Sterlin’s work colleagues all seemed possess a magical air of elegance and gravity about them, simply by virtue of having been born in that country.

Now, as I’ve mentioned before, Sterlin was not known for her culinary prowess. Nevertheless, she determined that she’d prepare a homecooked meal for meal at least once during my stay (as it turned out, she managed that feat twice in the ten days!).  Along with Date Pasta, another of her newfound staples was a Green Curry stew, made with chicken (still on regular rotation on my plate in those days) and a slew of vegetables enrobed in a rich, glossy coconut milk base and spiced with fragrant Thai green curry paste.

I was hooked immediately, demanded the recipe, and promptly made the dish as soon as I got back to North America. I’ve been a fan of all things Thai ever since.

My version of the dip. The HH and I devoured this in short order!

This Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip from Brandi Doming’s new cookbook, The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less may not be a stew, but just like a classic Thai recipe, its marriage of sweet, salty and spicy–with the tiniest hint of sour from the lemon and bitter from the almond butter–it will win you over with the first taste.

Both the HH and I LOVED this dip. Like, loved-so-much-I-wanted-to-kiss-it. Or loved-so-much-I-didn’t-bother-with-crackers-and-just-ate-it-off-a-spoon. And also, loved-so-much-I-would-adopt-it-if-I-could. Yeah. Loved-so-much-that-Chaser-got-jealous. THAT much. The HH said, “You really should make this again. This is delicious. Definitely make this again. . . ” all the while stuffing his face with dip-coated nacho chips.

Anyone who follows plant-based bloggers is likely already familiar with Brandi and her signature “8 ingredients or less” oil-free recipes.  I was excited to see that many of the recipes were also gluten-free and free of refined sugars, too, so they would be suitable for a diet like mine.

Along with stunning photos and recipes, the book also provides a full chapter on “The Vegan 8 Kitchen,” (with everything from “Getting Started” to baking tips, Brandi’s pantry staples, seasonings, sweeteners, nut butters and other natural fats, flours, starches and other kitchen equipment), plus individual chapters on “Breakfast,” “Scrumptious Snacks & Appetizers,” “Time-Crunch Lunches,” “Sauces and Dressings,” “Easy Entrees,” “Comforting Soups & Stews,” “Sides & Dips,” “Crowd-Pleasing Desserts,” and “Staples” (like    spaghetti sauce, BBQ sauce, spice blends or homemade nut milks). There’s also a full chart of Imperial-to-metric equivalents.

Some of the recipes I can’t wait to try include Bakery-Style Blueberry Muffins, Spice-is-Nice Baked Oatmeal Squares, Sunflower-Cinnamon Chia Balls, Creamy Lemon and Garlic White Bean Crostini, 20-Minute Alfredo, Mexican Tahini Chickpeas, BBQ Chipotle Green Lentils with Potato Wedges, “My Favorite” Savory Meatless Bean Balls, Teriyaki Patties, Ultimate Broccoli-Cheese Soup, Hungarian Red Lentil Soup, Sweet Potato Cornbread and No-Bake Chocolate Espresso Fudge Cake–plus about 50 more!

Brandi and her publisher graciously allowed me to share the Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip here. Do give this one a try–it’s truly tantalizing and keeps nicely in the fridge. Just be warned: this dip likely won’t last very long.

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

    Print This!    

Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

reprinted with permission from The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less by Brandi Doming. Published by Oxmoor House.

Brandi says: “If there was ever a dip that won over taste testers, this is it! One of my tricks for super-creamy bean dips is to use white beans, which create a really smooth dip—a big help for oil-free recipes. This dip is creamy like a hummus with bold Thai curry flavors that complement the sweet potato beautifully. With the garnishes, it makes a lovely presentation for a gathering.”

1 packed cup (248g) cooked, mashed sweet potato 1 (15-ounce) can white cannellini beans, drained and rinsed, or 1 1⁄2 cups cooked white beans (255g) 2 tablespoons (30 ml) fresh lime juice 2 tablespoons (30 ml) roasted smooth almond butter 2 tablespoons (30 ml) low-sodium soy sauce [I used Braggs aminos] 1⁄4 cup (60 ml) Thai red curry paste [I used Thai Kitchen] 1 teaspoon (5 ml) dried basil 1⁄2 teaspoon (2.5 ml) ground coriander 1⁄4 teaspoon (1 ml) fine salt Optional: roasted sliced almonds, fresh chopped basil for garnish; crackers, chips, or sliced vegetables for serving

Add the mashed sweet potato, beans, lime juice, almond butter, soy sauce, 2 tablespoons (30g) hot water, curry paste, basil, coriander, and salt to a food processor; process for 3 to 4 minutes or until very smooth. Scrape the sides and process again. Taste and add more salt, if desired. Garnish with almonds and basil, if desired, and serve with chips, crackers, or assorted sliced vegetables. Makes about 3 cups (720 ml).

Nutrition per 1⁄2 cup: 151 calories | 3g fat | 6.8g protein | 24.7g carbs | 5.4g fiber | 3.8g sugar | 704mg sodium

NOTE: Bake the sweet potato at 400°F (200°C) for 45 minutes to an hour until very soft. I would advise against steaming or boiling, as it will add extra water to the potatoes and dilute the flavor. Peel and mash 1 cup (248g) of the cooked potatoes. The roasted almond butter is slightly sweet, which complements the spicy curry flavor well, but if you’re allergic, you can sub with tahini for a slightly different flavor profile than the original recipe.

Suitable for: ACD All stages (if you use an ACD-safe red curry paste); refined sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free, vegan, low glycemic.

Disclosure: Links in this post may be affiliate links. If you choose to purchase using those links, at no cost to you, I will receive a small percentage of the sale.

Subscribe for recipes and more about living well without sugar, gluten, eggs or dairy! Click here to subscribe to RickiHeller.com via email. You’ll receive emails sharing recipes and videos as soon as they’re posted, plus weekly updates and news about upcoming events. A healthy lifestyle CAN be sweet!

Source: https://www.rickiheller.com/2018/10/thai-red-curry-sweet-potato-dip/

[ladystylestores]

Creamy No-Bake Mocha Chocolate Vegan Cheesecake • The Healthy Foodie

A truly heavenly dessert that contains nothing but wholesome ingredients, this sinfully creamy Mocha Chocolate Vegan Cheesecake will totally blow your mind!

While in Costa Rica, there are a couple of things that I truly missed. One of them was tofu — call me weird, but I happen to love the stuff and not only is it very hard to find over there, but their firm tofu is the equivalent of our silky; so yeah… not very good for cooking! — and the other one was baking and creating yummy desserts! I just never found myself in a proper set-up for that…

I ended up getting back home not long before my birthday, and then Easter was just a handful of days later. With cheesecake being my favorite dessert in the whole wide world — the only one thing I truly miss since going vegan — and well, chocolate and Easter being so totally inseparable, I didn’t have to think very long before deciding that I was going to whip some kind of a Vegan Chocolate Cheesecake for the occasions.

The plan was to make the cake for my birthday — which I had to spend confined at home — and that should’ve given ample time to share the recipe with you in time for Easter, but then life got in the way, I had to get my water pump fixed instead, yay-fun-NOT, I’ll spare you the details… and so plans had to change!

But I still made the cake — boy ô boy, be happy that I did! — and I’m still sharing the recipe with you today! In time for next year’s Easter!

Joking aside, you can totally make this cake for just about any occasion, no need to wait for your birthday, or for Easter. And while it might look like it’s super complicated and seems like it would take forever to make, know that it really isn’t that hard at all, and that it comes together fairly quickly, too.

But honestly, the only thing you really need to know is that this heavenly cake is sinfully delicious. And yes, one can totally use the words heavenly AND sinfully together in the same breath. This cake is living proof of that! What’s more, you’ll never believe that it’s made with nothing but healthy stuff and wholesome ingredients.

Oh, and whoever you share it with will love you for the rest of their life!

For the crust

Start by lining the bottom of an 8″ springform pan with parchment paper. To do that, remove the ring and cover the plate with parchment paper; Fold the excess paper back under the plate and, while holding it in place with one hand, put the ring back in its position with the other hand. Bring the excess paper back from under the pan but do not cut it off.

Now combine the ground rolled oats, almond flour, cacao powder, cinnamon and salt in a large mixing bowl. Add the melted coconut oil, maple syrup and vanilla extract.

Mix with a large spoon or rubber spatula until well combined.

Transfer the crust mixture to the prepared pan and press it delicately at the bottom, going slightly up the sides, then place the pan in the fridge for that crust to set.

To press the crust, I like to use a flat bottomed glass, or similar flat object… it makes the job so much easier. If you find that the crust tends to stick to your glass, just dip it lightly in cold water.

For the creamy mocha filling

Now let’s get working on that yummy filling. It’s fairly easy, you’ll see! Start by placing the raw cashews and hot coffee in the container of a high speed blender.

If you didn’t have a high speed blender, you could probably get away with using a conventional blender, or even a food processor, but your cake won’t turn out nearly as creamy… 

Process the cashews and coffee until smooth and creamy. Start that blender on low and progressively increase the speed to high, and stop to scrape the sides once or twice during the process to be sure that every last bit gets incorporated.

Once smooth, add the date paste, coconut milk (be sure to use the full fat kind), coconut oil (no need to melt it this time), maple syrup, lime juice, vanilla and salt.

Again, process until well combined, smooth and creamy, stopping to scrape the sides as needed.

Pour in the melted unsweetened chocolate and resume blending until it is fully incorporated.

My favorite method for melting chocolate is to chop it super finely and then melt it in a small saucepan over very low heat, stirring almost constantly until about half of the chocolate is melted. I then kill the heat and keep stirring until all the chocolate bits are melted, returning to the heat briefly if and as needed.

Transfer every last bit of that delicious, creamy mocha chocolate mixture into the chilled prepared crust.

Every last bit I said… don’t try and leave some at the bottom of the container on purpose, just so you can lick it clean later! What? Who, me? No! I certainly did not! Alright, you got me… I did. But it was just a little teaspoon, I swear!

Now gently tap the sides of the pan, or bang it a few times on the counter, to even out the top and eliminate any potential air bubbles that may have gotten trapped in that sea of deliciousness…

Make that top all beautiful and nice and even by smoothing it with a small offset spatula and then place your cake in the fridge until it’s completely set, at least 4 hours, but even better yet, overnight.

That is what your cake will look like when it’s fully set. Then you’ll be ready for the next step…

For the chocolate topping

Once your cake is fully set, place the chopped dark chocolate, coconut milk (again, use the full fat variety), coconut oil and pinch of salt in a small saucepan.

Melt over very low heat, stirring almost constantly until about half of the chocolate chunks are melted. Remove from heat and keep stirring until fully melted and silky, returning the pan to the heat source briefly only if and as needed. It is very important that you do not let the mixture become hot.

Now take your cake out of the fridge and slowly pour the melted chocolate mixture right over it.

Again, gently tap the side of your pan and give it a little shake to help the chocolate settle and get really even and smooth.

Delicately transfer your cake to the fridge to set, from 10 to 30 minutes, depending on whether you plan on garnishing the top with chocolate shavings.

If you didn’t have any chocolate shavings and would like to make your own, check out this post to find out how I make mine…

Now, if you’re going to garnish your cake, you want to do that while the chocolate topping is still on the soft side, after about 10 minutes of refrigeration; this way the shavings will adhere to it. Then, return the cake to the fridge for another 20 minutes or so, until the chocolate topping is fully set.

On the other hand, if you’re not going to garnish that top, simply leave the cake in the fridge until fully set, about 30 minutes.

As you can see in the pictures, I went ahead and topped mine with a mountain of shavings and then chose to also toss a few roasted coffee beans in the lot!

Once the chocolate topping is fully set, carefully remove the cake from the pan and place it on a cake plate.

To release the cake real cleanly, it helps to slightly warm up the side of the pan. I find the best way to do this is by delicately heating it with a propane torch or warm cloth. If you choose to use a propane torch, make sure that you maintain a good distance from that pan and that you don’t stay in the same spot for more than a few seconds; keep that flame moving, or you may end up melting the cake!

Keep your finished cake in the refrigerator but if time permits, be sure to leave it at room temperature for about an hour before serving. Trust me, your taste buds will thank you!

Mocha Chocolate Vegan Cheesecake

A truly heavenly dessert that contains nothing but wholesome ingredients, this sinfully creamy Mocha Chocolate Vegan Cheesecake will totally blow your mind!

Servings: 16

For the creamy mocha filling

For the chocolate topping

Optional garnish

Chocolate shavings, ***

Whole roasted coffee beans

Springform pan

High Speed Blender

For the crust

Line the bottom of an 8″ springform pan with parchment paper. To do that, remove the ring and cover the bottom with parchment paper; Fold the excess paper back under the plate and, while holding it in place with one hand, put the ring back in its position with the other hand. Bring the excess paper back from under the pan but do not cut it off.

Combine the ground rolled oats, almond flour, cacao powder, cinnamon and salt in a large mixing bowl. Add the melted coconut oil, maple syrup and vanilla extract and mix until well combined.

Transfer the mixture to the prepared pan and press it delicately at the bottom, going slightly up the sides; place in the fridge to set.

For the creamy mocha filling

Put the raw cashews and hot coffee in the container of a high speed blender and process until smooth and creamy; start on low and progressively increase the speed to high, and stop to scrape the sides once or twice to be sure that every last bit is incorporated.

Once smooth, add the date paste, coconut milk, coconut oil (no need to melt it this time), maple syrup, lime juice, vanilla and salt and again, process until well combined, smooth and creamy, stopping to scrape the sides as needed.

Pour in the melted chocolate and blend until fully incorporated.

Transfer the mixture into the prepared crust, tap the sides a few times to even out the top and eliminate air bubbles, then smooth the top with a small offset spatula.

Place the cake in the fridge until completely set, at least 4 hours.

For the chocolate topping

Place all the ingredients in a small saucepan and melt over very low heat, stirring almost constantly until about half of the chocolate chunks are melted. Remove from heat and keep stirring until fully melted and silky, returning the pan to the heat source briefly only if and as needed. It is very important that you do not let the mixture become hot.

Take the cake out of the fridge and pour the melted chocolate mixture over it, then gently tap the side of your pan and give it a little shake to help the chocolate settle and get really smooth.

Delicately transfer the cake to the fridge to set, about 30 minutes total. However, if are going to garnish the top with chocolate shavings, you should do so while the chocolate topping is still on the soft side, after about 10 minutes of refrigeration, and then return the cake to the fridge for another 20 minutes; this will ensure that the shavings adhere well to the chocolate topping. If you’re not going to garnish that top, simply leave the cake in the fridge until fully set, about 30 minutes.

Once set, carefully remove the cake from the pan**** and place it on a cake plate.

Keep your finished cake in the refrigerator but if time permits, leave it at room temperature for about an hour before serving.

*Use a coffee grinder or small food processor to grind the oats **Melt the chocolate using your favorite method. Me, I like to chop it super finely and then melt it in a small saucepan over very low heat, stirring almost constantly until about half of the chocolate is melted. I then kill the heat and keep stirring until all the chocolate bits are melted, returning to the heat briefly if and as needed. ***If you want to make your own chocolate shavings, check out this post to find out how I make mine ****To release the cake real cleanly, it helps to slightly warm up the side of the pan. I find the best way to do this is by delicately heating it with a propane torch or warm cloth. If you choose to use a propane torch, make sure that you maintain a good distance from that pan and that you don’t stay in the same spot for more than a few seconds; keep that flame moving, or you may end up melting the cake!

Calories: 539kcal, Carbohydrates: 44g, Protein: 9g, Fat: 40g, Saturated Fat: 24g, Cholesterol: 1mg, Sodium: 122mg, Potassium: 536mg, Fiber: 6g, Sugar: 23g, Vitamin A: 26IU, Vitamin C: 1mg, Calcium: 72mg, Iron: 6mg

If you’ve tried this recipe, please take a minute to rate the recipe and let me know how things went for you in the comments below. It’s always such a pleasure to hear from you!

You can also FOLLOW ME on PINTEREST, FACEBOOK, INSTAGRAM and TWITTER for more delicious, healthy recipes!

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Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

[If you love Thai spices, you’ll adore this dip. Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip is sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free and low glycemic. Suitable for all stages on an anti-candida diet.]

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

Although I love to travel, I tend not to do it so much. The HH and I do love a little junket, mind you, but haven’t really taken one of those epic “across-Europe” or “to Bali and back” or “let’s-explore-the-fjords-of-Iceland” kind of trips. (Our one big adventure happened way back when we were first together, when we spent 10 glorious days in Newfoundland, strolling through untouched forests, staying and rustic B&Bs, spotting moose wandering off the highways, or whale-watching on the ocean**).

These days, we’re more likely to take a few days here, a few days there, and chillax at a resort up north by the pool. It’s all good.

But back in the days BHH (“before the HH”), I did venture on a major trip by myself to England, to visit my dear friend Sterlin.

At that time, Sterlin had just  wrapped up one job and was staying at home for the interim before the next job began. We timed my visit to coincide with her free days. It was epic!

Besides being eternally besotted by the English accent (or, more correctly, accentS, since every 2 blocks or so, it seemed to change), I was, of course, dumbstruck by the history, the regal architecture, the small-yet-intimate feel to the towns, the culture that permeated every nook and cranny (and there were quite a few crannies, as I recall).

In my short 10 days in the country, we managed to visit London (three times), Stratford, Nottingham, Cambridge, Oxford, and a slew of other smaller spots that escape me now. I loved the historic architecture of the cities, the museums that seemed to be on every corner, pristine fields and hills out in the rural countryside, and the ingrained history in every cobblestone.

I learned about university students’ secret codes, “public” vs private schools, the true history of Robin Hood, and how taxi drivers had over 2 years of school just to memorize the labrynthine streets of the city. Everyone I met from the clerk in the grocery store to the neighbor walking her dog to Sterlin’s work colleagues all seemed possess a magical air of elegance and gravity about them, simply by virtue of having been born in that country.

Now, as I’ve mentioned before, Sterlin was not known for her culinary prowess. Nevertheless, she determined that she’d prepare a homecooked meal for meal at least once during my stay (as it turned out, she managed that feat twice in the ten days!).  Along with Date Pasta, another of her newfound staples was a Green Curry stew, made with chicken (still on regular rotation on my plate in those days) and a slew of vegetables enrobed in a rich, glossy coconut milk base and spiced with fragrant Thai green curry paste.

I was hooked immediately, demanded the recipe, and promptly made the dish as soon as I got back to North America. I’ve been a fan of all things Thai ever since.

My version of the dip. The HH and I devoured this in short order!

This Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip from Brandi Doming’s new cookbook, The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less may not be a stew, but just like a classic Thai recipe, its marriage of sweet, salty and spicy–with the tiniest hint of sour from the lemon and bitter from the almond butter–it will win you over with the first taste.

Both the HH and I LOVED this dip. Like, loved-so-much-I-wanted-to-kiss-it. Or loved-so-much-I-didn’t-bother-with-crackers-and-just-ate-it-off-a-spoon. And also, loved-so-much-I-would-adopt-it-if-I-could. Yeah. Loved-so-much-that-Chaser-got-jealous. THAT much. The HH said, “You really should make this again. This is delicious. Definitely make this again. . . ” all the while stuffing his face with dip-coated nacho chips.

Anyone who follows plant-based bloggers is likely already familiar with Brandi and her signature “8 ingredients or less” oil-free recipes.  I was excited to see that many of the recipes were also gluten-free and free of refined sugars, too, so they would be suitable for a diet like mine.

Along with stunning photos and recipes, the book also provides a full chapter on “The Vegan 8 Kitchen,” (with everything from “Getting Started” to baking tips, Brandi’s pantry staples, seasonings, sweeteners, nut butters and other natural fats, flours, starches and other kitchen equipment), plus individual chapters on “Breakfast,” “Scrumptious Snacks & Appetizers,” “Time-Crunch Lunches,” “Sauces and Dressings,” “Easy Entrees,” “Comforting Soups & Stews,” “Sides & Dips,” “Crowd-Pleasing Desserts,” and “Staples” (like    spaghetti sauce, BBQ sauce, spice blends or homemade nut milks). There’s also a full chart of Imperial-to-metric equivalents.

Some of the recipes I can’t wait to try include Bakery-Style Blueberry Muffins, Spice-is-Nice Baked Oatmeal Squares, Sunflower-Cinnamon Chia Balls, Creamy Lemon and Garlic White Bean Crostini, 20-Minute Alfredo, Mexican Tahini Chickpeas, BBQ Chipotle Green Lentils with Potato Wedges, “My Favorite” Savory Meatless Bean Balls, Teriyaki Patties, Ultimate Broccoli-Cheese Soup, Hungarian Red Lentil Soup, Sweet Potato Cornbread and No-Bake Chocolate Espresso Fudge Cake–plus about 50 more!

Brandi and her publisher graciously allowed me to share the Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip here. Do give this one a try–it’s truly tantalizing and keeps nicely in the fridge. Just be warned: this dip likely won’t last very long.

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

    Print This!    

Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

reprinted with permission from The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less by Brandi Doming. Published by Oxmoor House.

Brandi says: “If there was ever a dip that won over taste testers, this is it! One of my tricks for super-creamy bean dips is to use white beans, which create a really smooth dip—a big help for oil-free recipes. This dip is creamy like a hummus with bold Thai curry flavors that complement the sweet potato beautifully. With the garnishes, it makes a lovely presentation for a gathering.”

1 packed cup (248g) cooked, mashed sweet potato 1 (15-ounce) can white cannellini beans, drained and rinsed, or 1 1⁄2 cups cooked white beans (255g) 2 tablespoons (30 ml) fresh lime juice 2 tablespoons (30 ml) roasted smooth almond butter 2 tablespoons (30 ml) low-sodium soy sauce [I used Braggs aminos] 1⁄4 cup (60 ml) Thai red curry paste [I used Thai Kitchen] 1 teaspoon (5 ml) dried basil 1⁄2 teaspoon (2.5 ml) ground coriander 1⁄4 teaspoon (1 ml) fine salt Optional: roasted sliced almonds, fresh chopped basil for garnish; crackers, chips, or sliced vegetables for serving

Add the mashed sweet potato, beans, lime juice, almond butter, soy sauce, 2 tablespoons (30g) hot water, curry paste, basil, coriander, and salt to a food processor; process for 3 to 4 minutes or until very smooth. Scrape the sides and process again. Taste and add more salt, if desired. Garnish with almonds and basil, if desired, and serve with chips, crackers, or assorted sliced vegetables. Makes about 3 cups (720 ml).

Nutrition per 1⁄2 cup: 151 calories | 3g fat | 6.8g protein | 24.7g carbs | 5.4g fiber | 3.8g sugar | 704mg sodium

NOTE: Bake the sweet potato at 400°F (200°C) for 45 minutes to an hour until very soft. I would advise against steaming or boiling, as it will add extra water to the potatoes and dilute the flavor. Peel and mash 1 cup (248g) of the cooked potatoes. The roasted almond butter is slightly sweet, which complements the spicy curry flavor well, but if you’re allergic, you can sub with tahini for a slightly different flavor profile than the original recipe.

Suitable for: ACD All stages (if you use an ACD-safe red curry paste); refined sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free, vegan, low glycemic.

Disclosure: Links in this post may be affiliate links. If you choose to purchase using those links, at no cost to you, I will receive a small percentage of the sale.

Subscribe for recipes and more about living well without sugar, gluten, eggs or dairy! Click here to subscribe to RickiHeller.com via email. You’ll receive emails sharing recipes and videos as soon as they’re posted, plus weekly updates and news about upcoming events. A healthy lifestyle CAN be sweet!

Source: https://www.rickiheller.com/2018/10/thai-red-curry-sweet-potato-dip/

[drycoin14-blog]

Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

[If you love Thai spices, you’ll adore this dip. Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip is sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free and low glycemic. Suitable for all stages on an anti-candida diet.]

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

Although I love to travel, I tend not to do it so much. The HH and I do love a little junket, mind you, but haven’t really taken one of those epic “across-Europe” or “to Bali and back” or “let’s-explore-the-fjords-of-Iceland” kind of trips. (Our one big adventure happened way back when we were first together, when we spent 10 glorious days in Newfoundland, strolling through untouched forests, staying and rustic B&Bs, spotting moose wandering off the highways, or whale-watching on the ocean**).

These days, we’re more likely to take a few days here, a few days there, and chillax at a resort up north by the pool. It’s all good.

But back in the days BHH (“before the HH”), I did venture on a major trip by myself to England, to visit my dear friend Sterlin.

At that time, Sterlin had just  wrapped up one job and was staying at home for the interim before the next job began. We timed my visit to coincide with her free days. It was epic!

Besides being eternally besotted by the English accent (or, more correctly, accentS, since every 2 blocks or so, it seemed to change), I was, of course, dumbstruck by the history, the regal architecture, the small-yet-intimate feel to the towns, the culture that permeated every nook and cranny (and there were quite a few crannies, as I recall).

In my short 10 days in the country, we managed to visit London (three times), Stratford, Nottingham, Cambridge, Oxford, and a slew of other smaller spots that escape me now. I loved the historic architecture of the cities, the museums that seemed to be on every corner, pristine fields and hills out in the rural countryside, and the ingrained history in every cobblestone.

I learned about university students’ secret codes, “public” vs private schools, the true history of Robin Hood, and how taxi drivers had over 2 years of school just to memorize the labrynthine streets of the city. Everyone I met from the clerk in the grocery store to the neighbor walking her dog to Sterlin’s work colleagues all seemed possess a magical air of elegance and gravity about them, simply by virtue of having been born in that country.

Now, as I’ve mentioned before, Sterlin was not known for her culinary prowess. Nevertheless, she determined that she’d prepare a homecooked meal for meal at least once during my stay (as it turned out, she managed that feat twice in the ten days!).  Along with Date Pasta, another of her newfound staples was a Green Curry stew, made with chicken (still on regular rotation on my plate in those days) and a slew of vegetables enrobed in a rich, glossy coconut milk base and spiced with fragrant Thai green curry paste.

I was hooked immediately, demanded the recipe, and promptly made the dish as soon as I got back to North America. I’ve been a fan of all things Thai ever since.

My version of the dip. The HH and I devoured this in short order!

This Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip from Brandi Doming’s new cookbook, The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less may not be a stew, but just like a classic Thai recipe, its marriage of sweet, salty and spicy–with the tiniest hint of sour from the lemon and bitter from the almond butter–it will win you over with the first taste.

Both the HH and I LOVED this dip. Like, loved-so-much-I-wanted-to-kiss-it. Or loved-so-much-I-didn’t-bother-with-crackers-and-just-ate-it-off-a-spoon. And also, loved-so-much-I-would-adopt-it-if-I-could. Yeah. Loved-so-much-that-Chaser-got-jealous. THAT much. The HH said, “You really should make this again. This is delicious. Definitely make this again. . . ” all the while stuffing his face with dip-coated nacho chips.

Anyone who follows plant-based bloggers is likely already familiar with Brandi and her signature “8 ingredients or less” oil-free recipes.  I was excited to see that many of the recipes were also gluten-free and free of refined sugars, too, so they would be suitable for a diet like mine.

Along with stunning photos and recipes, the book also provides a full chapter on “The Vegan 8 Kitchen,” (with everything from “Getting Started” to baking tips, Brandi’s pantry staples, seasonings, sweeteners, nut butters and other natural fats, flours, starches and other kitchen equipment), plus individual chapters on “Breakfast,” “Scrumptious Snacks & Appetizers,” “Time-Crunch Lunches,” “Sauces and Dressings,” “Easy Entrees,” “Comforting Soups & Stews,” “Sides & Dips,” “Crowd-Pleasing Desserts,” and “Staples” (like    spaghetti sauce, BBQ sauce, spice blends or homemade nut milks). There’s also a full chart of Imperial-to-metric equivalents.

Some of the recipes I can’t wait to try include Bakery-Style Blueberry Muffins, Spice-is-Nice Baked Oatmeal Squares, Sunflower-Cinnamon Chia Balls, Creamy Lemon and Garlic White Bean Crostini, 20-Minute Alfredo, Mexican Tahini Chickpeas, BBQ Chipotle Green Lentils with Potato Wedges, “My Favorite” Savory Meatless Bean Balls, Teriyaki Patties, Ultimate Broccoli-Cheese Soup, Hungarian Red Lentil Soup, Sweet Potato Cornbread and No-Bake Chocolate Espresso Fudge Cake–plus about 50 more!

Brandi and her publisher graciously allowed me to share the Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip here. Do give this one a try–it’s truly tantalizing and keeps nicely in the fridge. Just be warned: this dip likely won’t last very long.

Photo: Antonis Achilleos; Prop Stylist: Mindi Shapiro Levine; Food Stylist:Margaret Monroe Dickey

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Thai Red Curry Sweet Potato Dip

reprinted with permission from The Vegan 8: 100 Simple, Delicious Recipes Made with 8 Ingredients or Less by Brandi Doming. Published by Oxmoor House.

Brandi says: “If there was ever a dip that won over taste testers, this is it! One of my tricks for super-creamy bean dips is to use white beans, which create a really smooth dip—a big help for oil-free recipes. This dip is creamy like a hummus with bold Thai curry flavors that complement the sweet potato beautifully. With the garnishes, it makes a lovely presentation for a gathering.”

1 packed cup (248g) cooked, mashed sweet potato 1 (15-ounce) can white cannellini beans, drained and rinsed, or 1 1⁄2 cups cooked white beans (255g) 2 tablespoons (30 ml) fresh lime juice 2 tablespoons (30 ml) roasted smooth almond butter 2 tablespoons (30 ml) low-sodium soy sauce [I used Braggs aminos] 1⁄4 cup (60 ml) Thai red curry paste [I used Thai Kitchen] 1 teaspoon (5 ml) dried basil 1⁄2 teaspoon (2.5 ml) ground coriander 1⁄4 teaspoon (1 ml) fine salt Optional: roasted sliced almonds, fresh chopped basil for garnish; crackers, chips, or sliced vegetables for serving

Add the mashed sweet potato, beans, lime juice, almond butter, soy sauce, 2 tablespoons (30g) hot water, curry paste, basil, coriander, and salt to a food processor; process for 3 to 4 minutes or until very smooth. Scrape the sides and process again. Taste and add more salt, if desired. Garnish with almonds and basil, if desired, and serve with chips, crackers, or assorted sliced vegetables. Makes about 3 cups (720 ml).

Nutrition per 1⁄2 cup: 151 calories | 3g fat | 6.8g protein | 24.7g carbs | 5.4g fiber | 3.8g sugar | 704mg sodium

NOTE: Bake the sweet potato at 400°F (200°C) for 45 minutes to an hour until very soft. I would advise against steaming or boiling, as it will add extra water to the potatoes and dilute the flavor. Peel and mash 1 cup (248g) of the cooked potatoes. The roasted almond butter is slightly sweet, which complements the spicy curry flavor well, but if you’re allergic, you can sub with tahini for a slightly different flavor profile than the original recipe.

Suitable for: ACD All stages (if you use an ACD-safe red curry paste); refined sugar-free, gluten-free, grain-free, dairy-free, egg free, vegan, low glycemic.

Disclosure: Links in this post may be affiliate links. If you choose to purchase using those links, at no cost to you, I will receive a small percentage of the sale.

Subscribe for recipes and more about living well without sugar, gluten, eggs or dairy! Click here to subscribe to RickiHeller.com via email. You’ll receive emails sharing recipes and videos as soon as they’re posted, plus weekly updates and news about upcoming events. A healthy lifestyle CAN be sweet!

Source: https://www.rickiheller.com/2018/10/thai-red-curry-sweet-potato-dip/

[heatpeen03-blog]

Métier (Washington, DC)

Metier Restaurant 1015 7th St NW, Washington, DC 20001 202.737.7500 www.metierdc.com Wed 08/08/2018, 07:30p-10:35p

Given how much I enjoyed Kinship, I think it was pretty much a given that I'd eventually try Métier. Named after the French word for trade or occupation, the restaurant opened in April 2016 and is again the work of Chef Eric Ziebold and partner Célia Lauren. However, compared to Kinship, it's a tasting menu-only sort of place, one serving Ziebold's vision for elevated, contemporary American cuisine. Métier was awarded a Michelin star in October 2017 (which it has retained), and perhaps more importantly, was deemed the best restaurant in the DC area by Washingtonian at the start of this year.

Métier is located underground, underneath Kinship, and is accessed via a private elevator. Upon stepping out of said elevator, you're invited to relax in the salon, where you can partake in an hors d'oeuvre and apéritif.

Tonight's welcome cocktail was an anise hyssop-melon spritz, a lively, invigorating concoction showcasing a deft balance between fruitiness and herbaceousness.

To munch on, we received a dish of egg white bavarois with marinated caviar and Yukon Gold chips, which was pretty amazing. The custard melded the perfect creaminess of egg with a touch of sweetness, while the onion and caviar adding wonderfully contrasting hits of zestiness and salt. Think of this as the best sour cream and onion potato chips you've ever had.

La Ultima [$17.00] | Mezcal, Amaro Montenegro, Green Chartreuse, Lemon Given that we were in here for about 20 minutes, I went ahead and ordered a cocktail from the upstairs bar. The drink smelled strongly smoky from the mezcal, with a distinct vegetal character and traces of citrus. Taste-wise, I got more smoke up front, leading to a marked savoriness and an interesting herbal-astringent element that I couldn't quite put my finger on--it was almost like a "hot" radish, if that makes sense.

After some time, we were called into the main dining room. Penned by Darryl Carter (who also did Kinship), the space is a blend of the modern and the antique, and seats about three dozen. Note the 14-seater private dining room in the back.

Above we see the evening's menu, comprising seven courses at $200 a head, inclusive of service but not tax or beverages. And speaking of libations, I opted for the wine pairing ($145), though of course there's a pretty extensive bottle list if you'd prefer, with prices ranging from "reasonable" to "used car." The menu notes were a nice touch I have to say. Click for larger versions.

1: Iced L'Abeille Garden Ratatouille Leo Steen, Jurassic Park, Chenin Blanc, Santa Ynez Valley, CA, 2012 Given the hot weather we were having, it felt appropriate to begin with such a bright, refreshing course. An unconventional ratatouille of sorts, the vibrancy of the veggies was on display--unmitigated, yet bound together by the potency of olive oil. The paired Chenin Blanc fit the bill nicely too, smelling fruity and earthy while the palate went in a sweet 'n' savory direction, with a steely minerality and agreeable acidity.

The dish was accompanied by lángos, a type of Hungarian fried bread. Airy and light, it had a sweet-salty thing going and actually reminded me of Chinese you tiao.

2: L'Abeille Garden La Ratte Potato Fondant | Sautéed Chive Blossom, Lobster Coral Emulsion and Australian Black Truffle Château Latour-Martillac Blanc, Pessac Léognan, Bordeaux, France, 2005 Next was as decadent of a preparation of potato as I'd ever seen. The Rattes themselves were pleasantly firm to the bite, and showed off a restrained richness that matched up beautifully with the luxuriousness and brine of that lobster sauce, all while the truffles imparted a further muskiness to it all. The dish stood up well to the paired wine. A Sémillon-Sauvignon Blanc blend, it displayed a sweet, oxidative nose and a palate rich and rife with nutty, buttery, oaky, vegetal nuances. Interestingly, it actually became much more fruit-forward when taken with the food.

For course #2, bread duties were handled by airy, chewy, subtly tart slices of pane francese, which I eagerly used to sop up the remaining liquid on the plate above.

3: Madras Curry Poached Atlantic Halibut | Coconut Creamed Corn with Compressed Mango and Cilantro Alzinger, Loibenberg, Riesling Smaragd, Wachau, Austria, 2016 Halibut arrived flawlessly cooked--it was about as perfect as it gets. The fish possessed just the right amount of curry spice, which was smoothed out by the sweetness of corn and coconut while the cilantro offered up a citrusy accent. Along with the halibut came an Austrian Riesling, one brimming with rich fruit and stone on the nose. Its taste was super fresh, vibrant, with more fruit and minerals alongside a pleasing tartness and acidity--it did a great job linking up with the sweetness in the dish.

4: Sautéed Moulard Duck Foie Gras | Duck Confit-Stuffed Savoy Cabbage and Peach BBQ Sauce Domaine Raspail-Ay, Gigondas, Rhône Valley, France, 2015 I was a bit scared of this next course. First off, I'm very wary of sweet foie gras preparations, and this had peach. Secondly, there's duck confit, and that just sounds like heavy on heavy. Fortunately, the dish actually worked, very well in fact. The foie itself was spot on in its sear, and had all the classic flavors you'd expect, while the cabbage worked beautifully for contrast. The surprise here was the confit, which ate as you'd expect, but somehow managed to not be overwhelming; I could say the same about the peach. Obviously, we had to have a wine that could stand up to the heft of the course, and the GSM blend made sense with its generous helping of (tannic) red fruit, pepper, and spice.

5: Martin Farms Minute Steak | Grilled Onions, Morel Mushrooms, Okra Croutons with Garden Herb Vinaigrette and Roquefort Dressing Château Latour-Martillac, Pessac Léognan, Bordeaux, France, 2009 I rarely see minute steak on menus these days, which I suppose makes sense given that it's typically not the sexiest cut out there. Ziebold's version, however, was a winner no doubt. It was tender, sure, but also one of the most flavorful steaks I've had in a while, and I absolutely loved the zippiness and acidity from that herb vinaigrette, while the onions and 'shrooms imparted further complexity to the dish. The meat called for a powerful red wine, and the matched Bordeaux met the mark. Comprised mostly of Cabernet Sauvignon, it was pretty prototypical of the region with its soft, velvety palate of robust berry fruit commingled with some almost meaty notes and a touch of heat.

The steak came with a serving of the Chef's famous Parker House rolls, which were oh-so buttery and airy and salty and just as good as I remember from the CityZen days. And yes, I made sure to mop up the remaining liquid above with 'em.

6: Key Lime Meringue | Crème Fraîche Cake, Granny Smith Apple, Cucumber and Shiso-Lime Granité Château Rieussec, Sauternes, France, 1988 With the savories done with, it was time for Pastry Chef Anne Specker (a CityZen alum) to shine. Our first dessert really did recall the essence of a classic key lime, playing the tartness of citrus against the sweetness of meringue while the granita added a bracing, herbaceous component. Going along with the course was a Sauternes with some nice age on it. It was just what I wanted, displaying loads of honeyed, stone fruit-esque sweetness balanced out by a fresh acidity and a touch of nuttiness.

7: Nut 'n' Honey | Ochoa Farms Tomato Confit, Peanut Butter Cream, Honeycomb and Yellow Tomato Sorbet Kelt, Tour du Monde, VSOP, Grande Champagne, Cognac, France The humble tomato was the hero in our final (proper) course, its slightly savory disposition making itself known for sure against a backdrop of peanut--very neat. To drink, we moved away from wine and into cognac, specifically an ocean-matured example filled with warmth, sweetness, and spice, along with notes of wood and mature grapes.

At this point, I was provided a shot glass of milk granita and instructed to construct my own milk shake, choosing from flavors of chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry-verbena. I think it's obvious from the color which option I picked. In hindsight, I should've gone with Neapolitan.

Next came some wonderfully crisp, buttery, freshly baked malted vanilla shortbread cookies.

Rum Old Fashioned [$17.00] | Santa Teresa 1796, Bitters, Simple Syrup, Lemon Zest I requested a digestif and was brought this rum-based cocktail. It had a nose of warming spice and caramel mixed with citrus. The taste was sweet and fruity and chocolatey from the rum, with a smidge of bitterness and a long-lasting finish filled with brown sugar.

Guests were provided a vial of Old Bay olive oil to take home. And fortunately, I had no issues taking this in my carry-on luggage.

Tonight's meal effectively confirmed Ziebold's position as one of the top toques in DC. His food isn't necessarily flashy, but it is pretty much flawless (as was the service). There's a familiarity to the dishes, yet I still find myself pleasantly surprised at every turn. I get a restrained playfulness in the cooking, as well as a sort of quiet confidence that must, I imagine, stem from years and years in the biz. I think it's safe to say that Métier's got to be one of the premier dining experiences in DC.

Source: http://www.kevineats.com/2018/08/metier-washington-dc.html