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soobnny · 2 years ago

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eighteen — kim seungmin.

trope. best friends to lovers. college au. slow burn. angst. fluff.

synopsis. it takes you a while to realize being known is being loved, and kim seungmin just so happens to be an expert in the study of you.

word count: 19.8k words

warnings. just extreme slow burn. some curse words. sexual jokes. drinking and being intoxicated.

note. again my self indulgent take on seungmin in college :)

one.

Kim Seungmin has a habit of blowing up your phone every chance he gets. So, it really isn’t anything new to wake up to a million notifications from your best friend.

The range of apps from which he bothers you is astronomical.

(Instagram): _seungmin mentioned you in a comment: @ynbread lmao this video reminded me of u cos ure an idiot

(Tiktok): seungmin mentioned you in a comment: @ynbread us

(Twitter): seungmin replied to your tweet: I’m hungry can u reply to my messages

But nothing, absolutely nothing, can beat the 56 messages and 9 missed calls on your phone. You’d think it was an emergency if not for his last message, shining brightly through your screen.

minnie: i need a new face wash come with me so i can shut up about it 😡

You roll your eyes to yourself, skimming through the notifications on your lock screen without really opening them. It’s mostly just a series of Seungmin asking you if you were awake every hour with a few whining in between about how he’s bored and how you need to wake up.

While you’re laughing at his overdramatic messages (has he been hanging out with Hyunjin too much these days?), you accidentally unleash a storm upon yourself.

You hadn’t meant to click on one of the notifications, and now a taunting “read” is on the bottom of his messages.

Big mistake.

All hell is about to break lose.

The moment Kim Seungmin receives the small indication that you’re finally awake, his face flashes on your screen almost immediately in a Facetime call. It’s tempting to decline his call in favor of burying your face back into your pillows, but the clock reads 11am and you have an annoying best friend that needs your attention. You know never to ignore Seungmin. You’ve learned that the hard way.

Swiping on accept, his head of fluffy hair pops up on your screen. “Finally! What took you so long?” His phone angle shifts so his face shows now – it seems like he’s outside as he’s looking left and right before crossing somewhere.

“Sleeping.” You rub your eyes, propping your phone against a box of tissues so he can see you while you fix your bed.

“Didn’t wanna wake up cause you were dreaming of me?” You can hear the laughter in his voice.

Appropriately, you respond by gifting him your middle finger. “You wish.”

“Did you sleep well?” You hum in response even though you doubt he could hear you amidst the noise outside and the shuffling of your bedsheets. “What did you need?” You grab your phone from your nightstand, walking towards your refrigerator to get a glass of water.

“Face wash. You’re coming with me. Oh, and bring an umbrella, it’s drizzling a little.”

“Gonna have to raincheck.”

Second big mistake.

“Why?” He drawls his question, whining and pushing his phone deeper towards his face so you can see his visible disapproval at your response.

“Seungmin, I just woke up. It’s gonna take me forever to get ready, and you’re already outside.”

There’s a lack of response from his end after a few seconds. When you look back at your phone screen, he seems preoccupied. “Minnie?”

“Wait, wait. I have to hang up, give me a second.”

You tilt your head in confusion, but you don’t say anything else. This was a rare moment when you got to escape from Seungmin’s evil clutches of always dragging you along when he goes out. Looking through your closet for a change of clothes after you shower, you jump at the sudden and very rushed pounding on your door.

You should’ve known better.

Opening the door, a breathless Seungmin slips past the space before pushing your door closed. “Why was Crazy Karen on shift today?” He falls face first on your couch, still heaving after the cardio he’d done to sprint towards your unit.

Seungmin’s been quite the expert at sneaking into your very ��strict with visitors’ building. Not only has he befriended Derek (the security guard on duty when it wasn’t Karen), he’s gone through every possible entrance and has mastered the way to your door. He’s been doing it for the past three years, to the point you’re convinced he could navigate his way around blindfolded.

Funnily enough, he was basically a criminal in your building. Karen (Crazy Karen, as Seungmin likes to call her) has been trying to catch him for forever. You’re convinced that one more push from Seungmin and she’d be printing flyers with his face on it with a clear “BANNED” message in red bold font and taping it on the walls of your building.

Seungmin’s been able to escape her for months now. Though, despite being an expert vigilante, he still has his lapses. And today, he hadn’t been aware that Karen was on duty. “(Name), she hates me!”

“She hates everyone.” You deadpan. Seungmin’s always found it disturbing that Karen didn’t like him. He was an angel in everyone’s eyes – your parents, Derek the security guard, your professors, your friends. If only they knew better.

With the thousands of people that adore him, Seungmin doesn’t know why Karen was such a tough egg to crack. Maybe she knew better, that your best friend is the devil incarnate, but the devil incarnate that you adore.

“How’d you get here so quickly? Wait… were you already on your way here before I picked up your call?” You ask pointedly, leaning against the wall and furrowing your eyebrows at Seungmin who still hasn’t left your couch, instead making himself comfortable by draping his legs across the armrest and hugging your throw pillow to his chest.

“Yes, cause you were ignoring me!” The pout on his face is so exaggerated, you would’ve smacked it off if you didn’t have the biggest crush on him.

“I wasn’t ignoring you. I was sleeping!”

“Tomato, tomato. Same thing.”

You concede the argument with a sigh because God forbid he lost an argument to you. “Anyways, (name).” He’s whining again, staring at you while you skim through your clothes. “I’m so hungry, I could eat your couch.”

“You do you, I guess.”

“Do you hate me?”

“Only sometimes.”

This was the funny thing about your friendship with Seungmin. From an outsider’s perspective, they would’ve sworn you two disliked each other – from your pointed responses and backhanded comments towards one another. However, through the lens of your shared friends, they knew you completed each other. Nobody (aside from Minho, and occasionally Jeongin) could match your best friend’s personality quite well, and absolutely nobody could get him as soft as you could. It’s reserved for your eyes only.

Chan jokes around that Seungmin should never drive you away because he’s finally found someone who gets along with him terribly well aside from them. He agrees, but he would never outwardly admit it out loud to his friends or to you. But deep down, he knows that you two understand every inch of each other like you’re a reflection of one another.

With that said, he wouldn’t want to spend his time buying face wash with anyone else.

When he suddenly gets off the couch, you look at him suspiciously. He’s walking in your direction now, beaming with his eyes squinting and lips curving up and hair falling perfectly on his forehead – he looks so cute that your heart starts feeling something you can’t quite identify. “(Name).”

“Seungmin.” He grabs your hands without warning and your heart catapults out of your chest.

“Come with me to buy face wash and we can eat lunch together. Please please, cause I’m your best friend and you can’t say no to me.” Seungmin defends his case like a lawyer desperate to win.

He leans in impossibly closer to your face as a vindictive tactic to get you to say yes, and you’re embarrassed to admit it’s working. You tell yourself you’re only agreeing so he would stop fiddling with your fingers with his perfectly crafted hands and looking at you with his stupid, pretty eyes.

“Fine, now let go of me so I can get a change of clothes. Besides, aren’t you like the number one Touch Hater anyway?”

Seungmin smiles triumphantly to himself, slipping his hands from yours. “How narcissistic of you to think you’re the only one I enjoy holding. I like Kkami too! And Soonie, and Doongie–”

“Why am I being classified with your friends’ pets?”

Kim Seungmin doesn’t admit that you’re the only person he likes to hold. Instead, he shrugs and pushes you towards your bathroom so you could hurry up and he can finally buy his face wash.

two.

The next time Kim Seungmin blows up your notifications is after you’ve just finished your last class of the week.

He’s already waiting for you outside your building, leaning against a lamp post and scrolling through dog videos on Tiktok with a few quokka appearances.

The algorithm confuses Seungmin in that it’s so fast to pick up the videos you’ve liked – even if it was just one. He’s pretty sure he’s only getting these rather abundant quokka videos because Jisung had borrowed his phone once and probably liked a Tiktok. Now it’s everywhere to the point that Seungmin could probably tell you at least 5 facts about them.

He’s been standing there for a good 10 minutes now. He has given up on texting you to ask when your classes end (he reasons your professor must have overtime again), instead just adding a shit ton of videos to his “dog” collection on Tiktok.

When you exit the building with some of your blockmates, you feel your heartbeat pick up its pace at the sight of Seungmin in his oversized gray Dodgers hoodie (one of your personal favorites to steal) and some light washed pants with his cute smile and messy hair.

He looks a little embarrassed, as if he wants the earth to swallow him up right then and there. You suppose it’s because he’s been standing there awkwardly, having to look at people in the passing while waiting for you.

Once you appear though, the embarrassment fizzles away and Seungmin is making his way towards you with his hands buried deep in the pockets of his hoodie.

“One more overtime and I’m gonna have to report that professor.”

“You’re just saying that cause you’re impatient and you hate having to wait for five minutes.”

“10 minutes. I waited ten minutes today.” You laugh at the boy, attention wavering when your friends bid their goodbyes to you and Seungmin. You wave politely, and Seungmin mimics you, smiling sheepishly and waving back.

You know they’re tripping over themselves after Seungmin smiles and waves back at them. You’ve been told multiple times by your blockmates that your best friend looks like a walking dream – the campus crush from the International Law and Legal Studies building.

You don’t disagree, it’s not exactly like you were blind. Every time you’d walk with Seungmin anywhere, he was bound to get some attention from the people around you.

There are multiple admirers lining up for your best friend, shaking as they make their way up to him just to say ‘hi’ or purposely standing near him during college events. It also doesn’t help that his whole friend group were the campus crush from their respective majors.

Too bad for your blockmates and the multiple people lining up willing to donate their kidneys though. Seungmin doesn’t care much about anything and anyone outside his carefully selected circle.

He’s polite, smiling back and waving and holding small conversations but there’s always a hint of disinterest when they’d try to keep the conversation longer than he’d like. He isn’t stupid and knows there’s always an ulterior motive to get with him. He knows how easy it is to mistake politeness for interest.

“Come on, I want coffee.” How demonic is it to have a friend who’s convinced he’s Bill Gates’ son with the amount of times he’s asked you to eat out.

Seungmin pushes you forward by placing a hand on the small of your back, his other hand clutching his messenger bag, guiding you to walk ahead along the sidewalks of your university.

He makes sure you’re on the safer side of the road, bumping you to move to the side.

You stop in your tracks, shaking your head at the boy and he looks at you with utter confusion. “I’m not coming with you to buy overpriced coffee. I’ve used up all my allowance for the week.”

“Waited for you for ten minutes just to be rejected. Ouch.”

“Sucks to be you.”

You’re about to say your goodbye to your best friend, heels shifting to walk the other way when his hand easily wraps around your wrist, pulling you back to where he’s stood. You slap his hand away, pointing an accusatory finger at his direction. “You are not gonna convince me. Not again.”

Screw him and his large hands and how easy it is for him to maneuver them back around your wrist to keep you in place. “I’ll pay, just come with me.”

You surrender in an instant. Who were you to pass on free coffee?

Seungmin smiles victoriously when you start walking by his side again before his face falls in a pout, going off in a tangent about how you’re only willing to hangout with him if he’s paying and how he’s too young to be your sugar daddy.

You sigh in relief when you reach the campus coffee shop, the strong aroma of coffee immediately filling your senses as Seungmin breathes out in delight.

Going straight to the counter, he orders himself an Iced Americano before turning to look at you. “Just the usual?” You nod your head, moving away to find a seat for the both of you.

Every time you’re in a coffee shop (which is, a lot), you’re reminded of the first time you met Seungmin.

He was working part time at a coffee shop, trying to save some money for college and you were merely a customer. He had accidentally knocked the - thankfully, cold - coffee all over you. In compensation, he begs for your order again so he could make it for free.

He still knows your coffee order by heart up until today.

Taking both of your orders, Seungmin moves to settle back to wherever you’re seated when he spots Jisung and Changbin sitting at your table as well.

He should’ve known they’d be here today – they practically lived on coffee. Seungmin supposes this is what double majoring in Music Management and with Music Theory and Composition looks like.

“Not you two again.” Seungmin fakes exasperation, standing by Jisung who’s seated next to you before shooing him away, claiming that Jisung was in his spot. Jisung simply smirks knowingly before shuffling towards the seat next to Changbin.

“So, I have a funny story.” When Changbin speaks up, Jisung is quick to clasp a hand over his mouth.

“We don’t have a funny story.” He counters Changbin’s claim pointedly, shaking his head and glaring at his best friend.

But who could open up a topic and not proceed around Seungmin? He’ll pull up every piece of blackmail he has on his phone, appropriately labeled “to use against friends” and start threatening you. Absolutely no one can escape Seungmin, and that’s how you find Changbin telling the story of how someone had kissed Jisung and when she pulled away, all he did was say “thank you”.

“Who says that after kissing someone?” Your laughter triggers a smile on Seungmin’s face, too busy observing you to make fun of Jisung. He’ll save that for later when you walk home together. For now, the sight of you laughing is too enchanting to look away from.

Jisung, on the other hand, ignores your question. He’s already embarrassed enough.

“I don’t know! I was nervous! My brain doesn’t work sometimes, you know?” Jisung’s running his hand through his hair in frustration, desperately trying to defend himself, hands moving inanimately while speaking.

“Your brain doesn’t work all the time.” Seungmin retorts and the boy pouts at his younger friend.

“Can we talk about something else?”

You, in fact, do not talk about anything else much to Jisung’s dismay. On your way back home, Changbin brings it up again after jokingly kissing Jisung’s cheek and saying “thank you” right after.

A heavy arm swings around your shoulder, Seungmin pulling you towards him as he lets his other friends be with their teasing. You look up at your best friend, shifting your attention back to the ground when you meet his gaze.

You’re walking slightly ahead of the two boys, and Seungmin’s just asking you how your day was. He always does this. Every time he walks you back to your building, he’d always ask how your day went.

This might have stemmed from your first and only huge argument – when you kept your feelings to yourself because you didn’t want to be a bother to him. Seungmin’s made sure to create a comfortable space for you to vent to him ever since.

When you talk, Seungmin listens attentively. You don’t know if you love or hate it. It’s a little difficult to recount what happened in your day when he’s looking at you like that. Seungmin may tease you a lot, but you know he cares a lot and one of his ways of showing that is by listening to you.

Your quiet conversation is cut short when the two boys catch up with you, Jisung’s eyes narrow at Seungmin while he walks backward so he’s in front of Seungmin. “How come you like touching (name) and not us?”

“Don’t say it like that, you sound like a perv.” Changbin smacks the back of his head and Jisung giggles when his choice of words dawn on him.

“Sorry. I mean, how come you’re not disgusted to initiate physical contact with her! What about me?”

(Because I like her, Seungmin thinks but doesn’t actually say).

Instead, Seungmin smirks, keeping his arm around you before teasing his older friend. “Aw, is our Jisung getting jealous? Don’t worry, I’ll hold your hand once we drop (name) off.”

“Actually?” Jisung beams at what Seungmin says and he halts his steps, instead walking forward with his hand outstretched towards where Seungmin’s standing.

“No, fuck off! I was kidding!” You laugh when Seungmin detaches himself from you so he can properly run away from Jisung who’s desperate to hold the young boy’s hand.

It’s in moments like these, when the feeling of his arm around your shoulder still lingers, and Jisung’s words echo in your head (why does he only hold you?), and Changbin’s nudging your side knowingly, that makes you think.

Could you possibly mean something more to Seungmin? The way that he means to you?

three.

Apart from your notifications, Kim Seungmin has a habit of blowing up your ears.

You hear him before you see him. Winter seems startled at the sudden screech of your name from the other side of the street, laughing quietly to herself when she spots Seungmin running at you in full speed. She pays no mind when Seungmin latches himself around you, waving at her after finding a comfortable spot to rest his chin (on top of your head).

“That felt like it came out of a movie.”

You’re still waiting for your food with Winter by the food truck. Seungmin doesn’t seem to mind the wait. Despite learning over the years that he was impatient and usually annoyed at anyone and everything that made him wait, he’s also come to realize that he doesn’t mind the wait when it comes to you. Why else would he wait for you despite your professor being well known for always going past his allotted time?

He couldn’t do that for anyone else.

“What are your plans after here?” Seungmin directs the question towards the both of you, slowly unhooking himself from around you to look at the menu of the food truck.

“Might go to the mall and buy some airpods.” Winter mumbles, pulling her bucket hat down in embarrassment as Seungmin stares at her in disbelief. “Wow. You said that as if you’re just buying a pencil or something.”

“No! What happened is that… I thought I left my airpods in my mom’s car. But look at this.” She pulls out her phone, showing the notification that said ‘French fries (the name of her airpods) is far from the user’. “So I think I must’ve left it on the plane when I was coming back here from the academic break.”

Winter’s pouting now at the thought of her upcoming big purchase. “I can’t survive without them. How am I supposed to tune everyone out?”

“Order for Winter.” The conversation is cut abruptly by the man at the food truck with your orders. You break out in a smile at the sight of the food, taking it from Winter and whispering a quick ‘thank you’.

“Spending money is so easy, but saving feels like a war.” Winter adds before she smells her food, mirroring the smile on your face and taking a bite out of the hard-shell taco she ordered. Seungmin looks around for a place to sit, spotting a bench not too far. “Come on, you girls need to sit.”

Ever the gentleman, Seungmin carries your drinks for you while you eat your food and walk to the bench he had spotted. Taking your seats, Winter pats your thigh and nods her head. “You got yourself a good one. I approve.”

You’re confused for a moment before you feel the heat creep up from your neck to your entire face. Thank God Seungmin didn’t hear Winter implying that she approved of him as your boyfriend. If he did, he pretended not to hear.

However, he isn’t blind and can see your impossibly red face in abruptness.

“Woah, do you need something to drink?” He grabs his water bottle from his bag, unscrewing the cap and nudging it to your general direction. You gratefully take it from him, chugging down his water to try and cool yourself down. Winter all but giggles, pretending she didn’t almost trigger you to choke down on your food.

The next few minutes are spent in silence with you and Winter savoring your food and Seungmin scrolling through his phone to check if he had any deadlines he missed. One of his hands rests naturally on your thigh, as if it was the most normal thing.

When Winter finishes her food, she abruptly gets up from her seat, facing the both of you. “I’m gonna get going now so I can buy the airpods and wallow in my dorm until I fall asleep.” Your face scrunches up in amusement, nodding your head and getting up from your seat to give her a quick hug. “Take care! Text me when you get home.”

“I hope you get me for Secret Santa this year!” Seungmin earns a soft punch from Winter at his side comment before she’s off to the mall. Seungmin’s quick to pull you back down on the bench when Winter leaves, scooting so there’s almost no space between the two of you.

“Do you have plans after here?” You hum, trying to think if you needed to be somewhere. Chewing down on your bottom lip, you shake your head. “I don’t think so.”

“Good. You’re eating dinner with me. And don’t worry, I know what you’re thinking. We’re just going to the cafeteria on campus. I’m not gonna rob you off of your allowance.” You laugh in approval, taking another bite down your taco before tilting your body so you’re facing Seungmin, offering some up to your best friend.

“You want some?” You find he’s staring somewhere else instead of the food you had pushed up to his face. Trying to follow his gaze, you tilt your head with wide, doe-eyes before looking back to see if there was something behind you. “What are you looking at?”

Seungmin clears his throat, snapping out of his daydream. “Nowhere. Just…” You’ve never seen Seungmin this hesitant before. He’s pulling at the sleeves of the green sweater he’s wearing, looking around before he fixes his gaze on you again.

Without warning, he sticks his thumb out to wipe something at the corner of your lips.

“You had some sauce on your lips.” He’s looking straight ahead now, avoiding your eyes, as if he didn’t just leave you dumbfounded. “Close your mouth. You look like a fish.” Only then do you realize your lips have parted a little at his sudden actions.

And then, just like Winter, he abruptly gets up. You don’t notice the redness at the tip of his ears when he leans down to pinch your cheeks. “Jeongin says he needs me. I’ll meet you for dinner, okay?”

You don’t tell him you know that Jeongin’s still in class right now.

four.

When you arrive, Kim Seungmin is already there, waving you over to where he’s seated.

It’s packed, as usual, filled with college kids that lived in the dorm areas around the campus. However, Seungmin still finds a seat for the both of you.

Slipping past numerous sleep-deprived college kids, you make your way to your best friend. He greets you with a quick side hug before he’s pushing the best selling mango shake of your cafeteria in your direction. “Oh my god, they weren’t sold out?”

Every student in your university knows that The Sunshine Harvest’s mango shake was the best drink ever made in mankind. It’s the stall with the longest line in your cafeteria which explains why it always sells out so fast. Everyone would rush to the cafeteria after their last class just to buy a cup – and it was budget friendly. You’ve long given up on buying one (after months) as your schedule never lined up to when there were still some left. You complained about it all the time to Seungmin.

“It wasn’t sold out when I got there. Probably is now.” He shrugs, trying to act nonchalant even though your smile is tipping him over the edge.

All you did was smile, and Seungmin’s forgotten everything he’s supposed to say or do. It was definitely worth waiting in line for 30 minutes, he concludes.

Happily sipping on your shake, you ask Seungmin if you should start lining up at the food stalls to get dinner. He simply nods his head, telling you to go ahead so he could look after your seats while you search for what you want to eat. Seungmin takes the small time he has alone to calm down.

Then, he receives a phone call from you.

“Do you want pizza?”

“Pizza’s fine.”

“Okay, I’ll buy us pizza.”

“When you finish ordering, just come here and give me the receipt, okay? I’ll wait for it.”

“Minnie, you’re quite literally the most impatient man on this planet. I can do it.”

“And you had a long day of classes today. Get your ass back here.”

Within minutes, you’re back at your seat and Seungmin’s sitting you down, taking the receipt from your hands. “Good girl.” He ruffles your hair, dropping his hand right after to squish your pouting cheeks before he’s off to wait for your pizza.

You drop your head on the table immediately after he leaves. Something in the way he said ‘good girl’ has your heart racing, and you can hear him tell you the table’s dirty but you cannot function at the moment so your face takes the consequence of Seungmin’s words.

Moments later, Seungmin returns with your pizza, setting it down on the table before taking his seat across from you. There’s still steam blowing from the pizza from how recent it was baked, and you hear your stomach grumble at the sight. You start to fiddle with your fingers, contemplating whether you should wait for it to cool down or grab a slice right now.

It looks so tempting to take a bite off.

“Don’t.” Before you can even proceed with your devious plan, you feel Seungmin flick your forehead as if he knows what you’re thinking. It’s because he does. Seungmin has memorized your body language. He knows you want to take a slice, and he also knows it’s still hot, and your tongue’s gonna burn, and you’re going to regret it. You slump back in your seat in defeat.

Seungmin considers himself a genius when it comes to the study of you. While was a stellar student in his school subjects, nothing will come close to the extent of knowledge he has on you. He’s learned about you for years, to the point he thinks he might know you better than he knows himself. He can read you like an open book – his open book. He knows that when the tip of your ears turn red, it means you’re angry. He knows you fiddle with your fingers when you’re bored. He knows you’re one of the few people who puts milk before the cereal (he’s sworn to keep that secret safe with him).

If Seungmin were to write his thesis paper about you, he was sure he’d get a perfect mark. He’s been unknowingly tucking little things he loved about you in his heart, which is why he waited those thirty damn minutes just to buy you that stupid mango shake that you loved so much.

He’s looking at you now, staring intensely at the pizza as if it'll cool down faster if you sent it a threatening glare. He smiles to himself, where you can’t see, and he thinks – “Wow, I really really like her.” And for a moment, he thinks he’s brave enough to say it out loud, but seconds turn into minutes and the moment passes. Instead, he chooses to roll up the wrapper from your straw and flick it at you to get your attention and tell you it’s okay to eat your pizza now.

And you smile, immediately going in to take a slice. You smile, and Seungmin thinks he never wants to go a day without seeing you smile. He forgives himself for not being able to tell you how he feels right now. He thinks he still has time. He still has so much time in the world to confess to you.

“It’s still hot. Careful, okay?” You take a bite and immediately wave a hand in front of your mouth from the heat. He laughs at your eagerness to finish the pizza despite its temperature and he reaches to grab his own slice.

Seungmin wishes he can spend all his dinners like this.

It isn’t long before Seungmin’s walking you home. Despite living in the dorms within campus, he still pushes to walk you back to your building that’s a little outside of the campus. “I’ll walk you home. Come on.”

On the way back, you spot the campus cats and dogs. You squeal at the sight of them, immediately crouching down and calling at them to come to where you and Seungmin are. The cats come mewling by your feet. Seungmin mirrors you and crouches down to pick one up in his arms, checking their collars and cooing audibly. “Hello, mushroom.”

“Oh, she’s so cute.” You stand back up to pet the little kitten in Seungmin’s arms. She reminds you of one of Minho’s cats. Minho would love her. And then, you gasp. You spot the cutest golden retriever puppy, scratching at his collar. Seungmin puts the kitten down to follow you towards where the puppy’s sitting.

“Hello there…” You take a quick glimpse at his collar. “Fang. What a cute name.” You speak in a soft voice, lifting him up gently in your arms. Fang seems to immediately melt in your touch the moment you pick him up and give him some head rubs.

Mushroom’s meowing in jealousy when Seungmin gives his attention elsewhere.

“Want me to rub your back? Or give you some belly rubs?” You smile sweetly, moving your hard towards his back and moving your fingers along his fur. “Minnie. Do you ever think about how easy it is to steal them?”

He laughs at your proposition, giving it a thought. “Maybe sometimes. I’m already a criminal in your building. Might as well be a criminal on campus too.” Seungmin joins you to rub behind Fang’s ears, a smile creeping up on his face.

“It’s getting late. We’re gonna have to go.” Seungmin says gently and you pout as you put the boy down. “I wish I could put you in my bag and take you home. You’re such a good boy.” You bid your goodbye to the puppy before letting him down.

“That just made my entire day.” You say to no one in particular as you wave one last time to the cats and dogs who go back to playing amongst themselves.

On the rest of the way back, Seungmin complains about Minho and his Criminal Law professor, and you talk about the long list of long tests and quizzes you have lined up for next week. Conversation with Seungmin always comes so easy. And when he sees your building, he makes it a point to slow down his pace so you can finish your story about the time Ryujin put red dye in Chaeryeong’s shampoo bottle. And he listens.

With you, it’s easy to forget time.

You finish your story just in time. Seungmin won’t tell you he tried to time it perfectly so you wouldn’t be interrupted while you happily shared the story.

“Goodnight idiot. Don’t pull another all nighter.” As usual, Seungmin’s fingers find their way to pinch your cheeks before pushing you towards the glass doors of your building. You laugh when you notice Seungmin’s eyes brighten at the sight of Derek, and he immediately sends a wave to his favorite security guard which Derek happily returns.

“Goodnight. Walk home safely!”

On the way back to his dorms, Seungmin’s phone buzzes from the pocket of his jeans. It's a notification from Jeongin.

(Instagram): maknaeontop mentioned you in a comment: @_seungmin isnt this u with yn LOL

The post reads: “I’ll walk with you” is just an excuse to spend more time with someone before they go and that’s romantic as fuck.

Seungmin rolls his eyes and locks his phone before shoving it in the pockets of his jeans. How convenient is Jeongin’s timing to tag him in that post after he just walked you home.

five.

Kim Seungmin also enjoys complaining a lot. Despite being the one to offer his help, he’s holding up quite an attitude while he’s carrying your laundry to the laundry shop.

You were simply just texting each other, and you happened to tell him you were going to be doing your laundry today, and how you were dreading the long walk while carrying your shit ton of dirty clothes. That’s how you find Kim Seungmin waiting for you outside your building, taking his sweet time glaring at Karen.

“Seungmin in the building!” His arms are open when he greets you and you fall into them in an instant. Seungmin rarely offers to hug you first so you take the moment to wrap your arms around him and stay in his embrace. Although, his enthusiasm doesn’t hold though when he’s carrying two bags of laundry on each of his shoulders and you’re walking to the laundry shop together.

“You seriously didn’t have to do this.”

“You would’ve suffered from extreme shoulder and back pains, and I would’ve had to hear about it for the rest of the day. I’m doing myself a favor.”

You roll your eyes and the conversation falls silent. A comfortable silence.

You take the moment to look Seungmin over. He’s just wearing a white shirt and some sweatpants, and yet he looks like the most beautiful person on the planet. That’s Seungmin for you. He could wear anything and make it work.

Fuck, he’s an alarm clock, and you’re so dazed by the way his hair looks like fluffy auburn under the sun, and how the outline of his chest is easy to see through his white shirt, and how his muscles are flexing from the weight of the bags he’s carrying. Since when did he start going to the gym? Was he always this tall?

He looks painfully dashing and you’re unaware that you’ve made it to the laundry shop until Seungmin’s snapping his fingers in front of your face to get your attention. “Huh, wait. Sorry.” You flush in embarrassment at being caught daydreaming.

“Lost you for a second there.”

You immediately get to work. You’ve already separated your clothes prior to coming here, so you begin to pour two caps of laundry detergent into the washer. Seungmin mirrors your actions so you can finish your laundry earlier. Pile by pile, you start adding your clothes to the washer and push the knob to turn it to normal cycle setting.

While waiting, you and Seungmin simply sit on the floor and lean against the wall, staring at the washer with your head resting on his shoulder and your legs outstretched on the ground.

You wonder when you should do your groceries. Maybe on Tuesday after your 1pm long test? You don’t think you have anything else to do on that day. Has Seungmin finished doing his groceries or would he want to come with you? You think he has a full day of classes on Tuesday.

“What’s on your mind?”

“Huh, what?” You pull your head away from his shoulder, and Seungmin regrets asking what’s on your mind. It’s too late to double down though.

“You were chewing on your lips. Assumed you were deep in thought.” You don’t know how chewing your lips has anything to do with being deep in thought. Have you always chewed down on your lips when you were thinking of something? Seungmin curses himself for letting that slip out so easily.

“Just thinking about when I should do my groceries.” Seungmin quickly dismisses the topic in fear of his feelings being caught. It doesn’t seem like you want to talk much about groceries either. So, you fall back in your comfortable silence and your head is back on his shoulder and a smile instantly crawls its way to Seungmin’s lips while he leans his head on yours.

“Why does it seem like it’s taking longer than usual?” You whine, staring at the washer with your eyes squinted a little. You look at the clock to see how much time has passed by and then back at the washer as if it’d speed up if you did. “Yeah, I’m tired of hanging out with you.”

Seungmin’s head falls when you pull your own head back to stick your tongue out at him. He just chuckles at you, linking his arm around you so he can pull you back. “Come back. I was comfortable.” He wraps an arm around you so he can push your head back on his shoulder and your heart skips a beat when he nuzzles his head against yours once again.

“Shouldn’t have said you were tired of hanging out with me then.” You mumble, afraid that your voice would quiver if you spoke any louder. Seungmin simply dismisses you with a wave of his head. “Yeah, yeah, I’m sorry.”

Time always moves faster when you’re actually enjoying the moment because a few minutes pass and the washer stops, and now you have to take your clothes out and place them in the dryer.

Seungmin stays, telling you he’d help with folding up your clothes and bringing them back to your building – which is exactly what he does when the dryer finishes. And somehow, folding your clothes has turned into a competition between the two of you when he’s claiming he can fold much more than you can.

He wins.

“It’s just because you have big hands!”

“Your argument makes no sense.”

“It does so! See, see. Look.”

You lift your hand mid-air, explaining to him why more work can be done with less effort if you have big hands compared to having smaller hands. It’s like walking less steps when you have longer legs. You’re not sure you’re making sense yourself, and you’re definitely not sure how to function when Seungmin reaches to meet his hand with yours.

His hands are big.

“You do have tiny baby hands. Are your hands smaller than Felix’s?” The moment feels way too intimate for you. While you’re just comparing hand sizes, it's the warmth of his hands that catch you off guard and the feeling that you wouldn’t mind feeling his hand like this every day.

Seungmin thinks about how easy it’d be to just intertwine your hands together.

“Uh… I don’t know. We’ll have to see.” You instantly pull your hand back, packing your folded clothes back in your bags. You don’t know why your face won’t stop smiling at what just happened so you bury your head deep into the bags so Seungmin can’t see how red your cheeks are.

“They’re definitely smaller. You don’t have to check.”

Seungmin doesn’t admit either that he doesn’t want you to press your hand against Felix’s like you did with his.

six.

Even when you’re not together physically, he still finds a way to annoy you.

“That’s what phones are made of!” He explains over the phone while you’re grocery shopping. Seungmin doesn’t seem to mind that his only view in your Facetime call is your double chin and the piles of food behind you.

“What are you doing grocery shopping on a Sunday anyway? Isn’t this your sleeping day?” He says as if it was a matter-of-fact. “There are no rules stating I can’t grocery shop on a Sunday.” You deadpan before grabbing a bottle of shampoo from the shelves.

The old lady looks at you like you’re crazy and you blush in embarrassment, pulling your cart away and moving to another section of the shop. It must look like you’re talking to yourself.

“You’re stressed, aren’t you?” Seungmin shifts from his position so he’s sitting up and he can hear you better which catches your attention. “So maybe I am a little.” You grab some toilet paper before you start to walk to the frozen section.

“You know you can talk to me, right? I’m always here to carry the weight with you.” You smile at the rare words of affirmation from your best friend. It was never his love language. He showed his affection through his acts of service, so you appreciate that he’s lowering down his teasing to genuinely comfort you while you’re stressed.

“I know. It’s just…” So you talk to him.

You rant to your best friend while you’re walking around the grocery store, and while numerous other old ladies and men look at you like you need to seek psychiatric help. You tell him about your blockmates and how they rarely put in work during group projects and activities. Seungmin knows it’s bothering you more than ever now since exams are nearing. That meant so were a shit ton of project deadlines.

“Need me to talk to them?” You laugh, dismissing him while you examine the ice cream flavors available. “That’s just embarrassing for me. Though, I’ll admit they’d be scared shitless if The Kim Seungmin scolded them.” You lean down to pick up the Rocky Road tub for yourself and a Mint Choco for Seungmin.

“Don’t talk about me like I’m all that. I’m just… Minnie.” Your heart warms at how he uses your nickname for him. “And I’m serious. I won’t hesitate talking to them if you need someone to knock some sense into them.” Your best friend scoffs at the thought of your group mates and the unnecessary amount of stress they’re putting you in.

“It’s alright. I’ll handle them. Do you need anything?” Your grocery list has long been crashed out and discarded in your pocket, now just looking around to see if there was anything else you could fit in your budget.

“Do you think you can get me some eggs?” You hum, moving towards where the dairy products are. “Just one carton?” You ask, skimming through them before grabbing a dozen upon Seungmin’s approval.

When he tells you he doesn’t need anything else, you move to fall in line so you can pay for your groceries. Only then do you realize that Seungmin’s wearing the fuzzy socks you got for him a few Christmases back.

“I thought you threw those out.”

“Hm?” Seungmin asks you to clarify.

“The socks I gave you as a gift.”

“I would never! They’re my happy socks. Also, wasn’t this the Christmas when you received that Ghibli inspired night light?”

“Yeah! How’d you remember?”

“You were really happy to get it. You would not stop talking about it.” He smiles his Seungmin smile while recalling the memory. You had quite literally screamed when you opened it and Seungmin almost fell out of his ass thinking that you got hurt or injured.

“Best. Gift. Ever.” You stressed every word, looking ahead to see you’re next in line. “I’m taking that as a challenge.”

“Alright. I have to pay. I’ll talk to you later!”

“Text me…”

“I’ll text you when I get home, I know, I know. Bye!” You hang up the call just in time for the person before you to finish and you start loading your items on the counter. When you exit the shop, you spot Felix with his own bag of groceries as well.

He greets you enthusiastically the moment he spots you, going in to give you a short hug and a small pat on your head. He’s smiling his sunshine smile as the two of you walk through the large shop together, and he’s kind enough to offer to carry one of your shopping bags for you as you exit. You decide to just take the train back to campus together as he lives in one of the in-campus dorms as well.

“Soooo… you and Seungmin together yet?” Felix stabs the silence with a knife, immediately going in for the kill. You scrunch your face, shaking your head as you look at him with your eyes squinted. “Felix.”

“No, but like! He’s always so happy when he’s with you. And even when you’re not around, he goes on and on about you. I’m pretty sure Changbin knew everything about you before he even met you.”

“Don’t give me false hope.” You nibble on your lip, looking down at your groceries as Felix navigates the both of you towards the train station.

Felix pauses, a small hand on your back to make sure he doesn’t lose you in the crowd of people waiting to catch the train. “It’s not false hope!” Felix is trying to find a way to properly articulate his thoughts to you. He’s not dumb – he sees the way Seungmin looks at you. Seungmin doesn’t need to tell him.

“Okay, listen to this. So, one time I went to their dorm, right? Cause I was stress-baking and I made too many brownies and I know how much Innie loves them so I went there. It was a little late in the night, and when I walked in about to announce my presence, Seungmin saw me.”

You look at him confused, but let him continue the story.

“Turns out, you had fallen asleep on him while the three of you were watching a movie, and there was this look on his face. I can’t even begin to explain, but he had this look, and he told me to be quiet so I don’t wake you up.”

You just scoff at his story.

“Fine, don’t believe me. One day, I’m gonna say I told you so.” He teases, and a faint smile forms on your face. “Let’s hope I get to hear that.” You feel your heart pumping at the thought. Felix seems really sincere with his words, but you didn’t want to hang onto something you don’t see yourself.

It’s quiet after that when you enter the train. It’s a little packed so there isn’t a seat for you and Felix, but he protectively stands beside you and ghosts an arm around you so you don’t fall when the train accelerates. Felix walks you all the way to your building before he hands you back your grocery bag.

“Bye Felix! Be safe.”

“Bye (name). Go and kiss Seungmin for me!”

“I hate you.”

He waves to you as he leaves and now the thought of kissing Seungmin is stuck in your head. Screw Lee Felix and his endless teasing.

seven.

You don’t see Seungmin until Thursday that week. You’ve been stressed. Really stressed. And Seungmin’s well aware.

He lets you rant to him at night, playing the part of your diary. He lets you be angry, he lets you be annoyed – without shame. He lets you feel every emotion and reminds you you’re valid for feeling that way.

You’re always thankful for Seungmin. You’re appreciative of the way he drops whatever he’s doing at any hint that you’re stressed just so he can listen. He doesn’t say anything while you rant, letting the moment be entirely yours. He simply plays his part as someone who’s there to hold the moment with you because he’s lucky enough to be the one to hear it.

So, on a Thursday, you text him asking if it was okay for you to drop by the dorms. He says yes in an instant, but tells you to come in 2 hours. He must’ve been busy.

But now, two hours later, you’re standing outside his dorm building with the carton of eggs you bought him and some jjajangmyeon. Jeongin, Seungmin’s roommate, is the one who greets you.

“(Name)!”

“Jeongin!”

He rushes to hug you, wrapping his long arms around you and lifting you from the ground just a little before placing you down safely. “How long has it been since you visited us? I’m a little hurt.” He accompanies you to leave your student ID with the guard, holding up the conversation and offering to bring the plastic bag you’re holding.

Jeongin announces your arrival by knocking on the door. How unusual for someone who also lives in that same dorm he’s knocking. Maybe he didn’t bring the keys with him?

There’s a sound of vague stumbling and cursing and rushing around before the door swings open to reveal a sweating Seungmin. “Hey. Long time no see.” He lets out a breath, one you think he’s been holding before he steps aside to let the both of you in. He smiles at you before his eyes land on the plastic Jeongin’s holding.

“My eggs! Thank you.” Seungmin pinches your cheeks in thanks before grabbing the bag from Jeongin who’s still chuckling over Seungmin’s very excited exclamation of his eggs. “And some jjajangmyeon, too? (Name), you sure know your way around my heart.”

“You’re welcome.” You sit yourself on their couch, noticing that the place has been tidied up a little. You laugh at the boys’ effort to clean up before you came over.

“You feeling better?” Seungmin plops down at the spot next to you, fixing his gaze on you.

“A little.” (Way better now that I’m here with you–).

“Good. Being stressed ages you faster. You’re already like half fifty or something.”

(--so I can strangle you.)

Jeongin nudges Seungmin suddenly, clearing his throat. You look at the younger boy suspiciously and suddenly Seungmin’s sweating again despite not doing anything. “I have a surprise.”

“You… have a surprise?” You tilt your head in confusion. Seungmin tells you to wait one moment as he waddles towards the door of their bathroom. What surprise could possibly be linked to their bathroom. “Seungmin. I swear to god if you show me one of your shit–”

Then, he opens the door and out comes running… Fang?

“Did you kidnap the campus dog?!” You shoot out of your seat, mouth dropping at the sight of the dog who’s excitedly jumping and demanding for your attention. “I was kidding when I talked about kidnapping them!”

“You said they’d cheer you up no matter what!” Your initial shock dissipates when Fang looks so cute barking and jumping at you, so you sit back down and he immediately hops on their couch to lay down on your lap.

“I helped too.” Jeongin states proudly, sitting on your left so you’re in between him and Seungmin who has taken the spot on your right. “You made the baby help you steal?” Seungmin rolls his eyes, rubbing Fang’s head. “He was more than happy to do it.”

Only then do you allow your heart to explode in your chest. Seungmin actually kidnapped the campus dog to surprise you because you’d been stressed for the week. Your emotions feel heightened, and you feel an overwhelming wave of love wash over you at its purest, unsolicited form.

He did this for you just because. He did it without expecting anything in return. He did it because you briefly mentioned how they made your day when you saw them that one time you ate dinner together.

You can’t do anything but stare at him for a moment, unable to really pay attention to Fang, not that he really needs it. Jeongin’s giving him enough attention by playing around with him. You’re absolutely dumbfounded at the heavy implication of care in his actions. Here he was next to you, holding with him all your feelings you’ve had for years.

“Thank you, Minnie.” You lean in to give him a small kiss on his cheek before you’re getting up to play with Fang and Jeongin. His pretty brown eyes go wide. There’s a deep inhalation while he sits there after you’d kissed his cheek. He’s taken by surprise, almost frozen in his spot.

He’d kidnap all the campus dogs and cats just to feel your lips on his cheek again.

He’s snapped out of his daze by the sound of knocking and almost immediately Jeongin’s rushing Fang back into their bathroom to hide him and their filthy crimes. They were going to return him. They were simply… borrowing.

Seungmin answers the door once Jeongin safely hides the cute puppy.

It’s Lee Minho.

“It’s just Minho!” Minho invites himself inside, waving at you once he spots you. “Why are you here?”

“I invited him so he could cook dinner for us. My wallet’s bleeding and I’m craving a home cooked meal.” Jeongin responds, opening the bathroom door to let Fang out again who instantly warms up to Minho. There’s obvious relief in his voice at not being caught. He was an accessory to the crime after all.

“Only if I get a hug from Seungminie.” Minho’s smirking, inching closer and closer to Seungmin who puts his arms out in front of him to block himself from the boy. “Move! You’re dirty! And don’t call me that.”

Minho all but laughs at Seungmin’s response, already having predicted it. He ignores Seungmin’s passiveness when it comes to affection, choosing instead to pet the puppy by his feet. “I’m not even gonna ask why you stole the campus dog.”

“We’re just borrowing him!”

“Can you steal Mushroom for me too?” Minho pats your head affectionately when he passes by you to make his way to the kitchen, looking through the pots and pans and ingredients to figure out what he’s going to be cooking tonight.

“Depends how much you’re willing to pay me.” Seungmin grins evilly, and Minho all but shakes his head at the younger boy.

It goes on like this for a while. You help Minho out sometimes at the kitchen because Seungmin and Jeongin cannot for the life of them cook without causing a fire, and then Minho pushes you to go back and play with Fang since Seungmin went through all the trouble kidnapping him for you (Jeongin couldn’t keep the secret and told Minho right away why they decided to steal the puppy).

You feel genuine happiness when you’re around them. The feeling remains even when you’ve sat down to eat.

Jeongin and Minho also can’t help but notice the happiness radiating off of Seungmin who’s staring at you and your smile when he thinks no one is looking.

eight.

Kim Seungmin’s friends are basically an extension of yours, like how your friends are an extension of his.

While some are closer with others, you don’t mind each other’s presence. Seungmin’s friend group is way bigger than yours – 8 boys including himself. As for you, you liked sticking with Winter, Chaeryeong, and Ryujin.

Hanging out in the big field of your school was supposed to be only amongst you and the 3 girls, but when the boys caught wind of your plans, they asked if they could tag along.

That’s how you find yourselves sitting on the field’s grass and chatting while some play a variation of volleyball by the side.

Everyone’s doing their own little thing, happy to just spend the afternoon with friends after a long week of classes. Ryujin’s bullying Chan, untying his shoelaces every chance she gets. Chaeryeong and Minho are discussing amongst themselves about their dance showcase coming up since they were both majoring in the same course (with Changbin constantly trying to bother them both – you wish Chaeryeong would punch him again so you could catch it on video this time). Hyunjin’s asking for Winter’s advice since he’s been tinkering with the idea of taking up Fashion Design. The rest of the boys are playing around with the exception of Seungmin who’s laying down on the picnic blanket you’d laid out.

“You mentioned you had a quiz today, right? How was that?” You look down at Seungmin even though he has an arm draped over his eyes to shield them from the sun.

“I think I did alright. Bolted out of there as soon as they started discussing their answers.”

The boy simply laughs, tuning out everyone else in favor of listening to your voice. It doesn’t last long though when Jisung is bothering everyone to play volleyball together. He claims it’s perfect since you were 12 total so exactly 6 people would be on each time like an actual game.

Feeling nice today, you decided to join in on his idea. Jisung is thankful for the support. It’s always his ideas that are turned down – though he’s to blame most of the time. Who thinks swimming in an ice cold lake is a good idea to hangout?

It’s only now that he thinks of something that’s normal to do so everyone gives him a chance.

So, you play. You, Ryujin, Chan, Felix, Minho and Hyunjin in one team and Seungmin, Changbin, Jeongin, Chaeryeong, Winter, and Jisung in another.

Your team wins both rounds. Seungmin’s just complaining about Changbin’s good at nothing while you switch courts to play a third round (even though your team’s already won). “That’s embarrassing.” Minho jests at the opposite team, laughing when Jisung pouts instantly.

“We’re just going to win again. Do you really wanna play another round?” Ryujin joins in on the teasing, finally creating a temporary truce with Chan as they were on the same team.

“Mean!” Chaeryeong remarks before slumping her shoulders. “She’s right though. They’re definitely gonna win again.”

“I hate all of you” are Seungmin’s last words before you play another round. The game goes by really quickly until Jisung accidentally spikes the ball in your direction and he’s immediately down on his knees apologizing to you.

Everyone’s eyes instantly land on Seungmin who’s already making his way to where you’re seated on the ground.

“I’m okay. It’s okay Ji!” Despite your verbal reassurance to everyone, he still places a fond hand on your head before he holds your chin, gently tilting your head on both sides to see if you were hit in the face.

Jisung’s now apologizing to both you and Seungmin.

Chan jumps on the opportunity to start taunting Jisung and how Seungmin was gonna be mad at him and Jisung’s sad attempts at getting the boy to hug him will all be in vain. “Chan, you’re my roommate. I thought you were supposed to be on my side!”

“I’m sorry, the roommate contract doesn’t cover taking your side.”

Seungmin doesn’t let the game continue after that, but nobody really minds, happy to finally take a break from playing.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Doting Seungmin is adorable as he’s wiping the sweat from your forehead, asking you a million times if you were hurt. He tells you it’s because he can’t pay in case you've broken a bone or something. You know better than that.

He was just being his ‘tsundere’ self.

“Yo, you guys ready for the midterms exams soon?” Chan opens up and a loud groan immediately leaves Ryujin’s lips in response. “Don’t even remind me.”

“I’m honestly just excited for the university festival right after.” Felix quips, hugging his knees to his chest. Winter and Hyunjin instantly agree, talking about wanting to help out with the booths.

“I wonder which artists are gonna perform. There’s no lineup yet, right?” Changbin asks, and everyone responds with a variation of ‘no’ or ‘I don’t know’ along with a list of some artists they wished would make an appearance.

“Ya, lovebirds!” Minho calls out to the both of you which catches your attention. “You’re going to the university festival after exams, right?”

Your eyes light up at the mention of the festival and you eagerly nod, completely disregarding how Minho called you lovebirds. Seungmin takes note of your excitement, smiling goofily to himself before replacing it with a straight face upon facing his friends. He knows they’ll never let him live it down if they caught him with that smile on his face.

Seungmin just watches as you start talking about which booths you wished to see and which artists you were hoping to perform, and how you were wondering if there was going to be a fireworks display at night.

Your grin is so wide and fond and excited that Seungmin can’t help but let his own smile unknowingly linger. Minho has a shit-eating grin on his face at the sight.

nine.

Hell week – the week before midterm exams – comes really quick, and soon you find yourself living through Seungmin’s coffee machine and 5 hours of sleep.

The campus library becomes your second home as does a lot of people from numerous departments, studying until ungodly hours and sneaking in cups of hot coffee. So, after eating dinner, you walk the familiar steps towards the library with your best friend.

Seungmin also seems to be running low on sleep, eyes drooping before you even made it to the library. However, ever the top student that he is, he fights through the exhaustion. He’s thankful for the distraction.

Ever since you mentioned your excitement for the university festival and the fireworks display, Seungmin’s mind has been eating at him to use it as the perfect opportunity to confess to you. It’s the only thing that replays in his mind when he isn’t doing anything — all the possible outcomes to a confession and all the possible ways to confess.

So, he’s more than grateful for the distraction.

Not so much the one in front of him right now though. You’ve been at the library for around an hour now, books and papers scattered around the table. Seungmin’s tapping his pen against his lips, elbow propped up on the wood of the table. Criminal law has long been discarded in his head, he’s read it way too many times for the past week in preparation for the exams.

“Stop looking. You’re distracting me.” You whisper for Seungmin to pay attention, not even bothering to look up from your own book as you shut your eyes closed to try the photographic memory you clearly don’t have before flipping to the next page.

“How narcissistic of you to think I’m staring at you.” He rolls his eyes just to be annoying before his cheek falls against his fist, eyes glazing over you again. He has little shame in his unabashed staring.

It’s how he notices your gentle shivering at the airconditioning of the library. “Did you forget to bring a jacket?”

You don’t hear him, and you don’t really have to as he’s already taking his hoodie off, dropping it on top of your book to grab your attention. “You’re shaking.” When you’re about to retort, saying he’d get cold too — he goes back to studying, placing his earphones in even though he isn’t listening to any music.

You notice it’s your favorite hoodie of his, the Dodgers gray hoodie, once you put it on. Almost immediately you’re engulfed in his warmth and his scent and you’re grateful for the jacket because your ass has been shaking for the last hour.

Seungmin’s attempt to get back to studying falls short when he catches a glimpse of you in his jacket that’s clearly too big for you.

His thoughts drift to the color of your eyes and the way your hair frames your face so prettily and how you look so cute with the sleeves of his jacket falling beyond where your hands are. He thinks about how it’d feel like if he went in for the first kiss, pressing his lips on yours without it being nerve-wracking.

He imagines everything and anything in that short amount of time, his notes discarded in favor of admiring you.

Seungmin is interrupted when you drop a copy of his perfectly written notes (from a class he took a year ago), asking him about a specific topic since you’re taking the class this year. He readjusts himself on the library seats, the ones he hates but puts up because you enjoy studying in the library so much.

Leaning in forward, Seungmin starts explaining to you the concepts of Politics and Governance and Health Laws. He glances at you with a frown when you seem to be staring at his notes blankly, having a hard time grasping all the information at once.

“You look like you’re fighting for your life in there.”

“That’s cause I am! How am I supposed to pass this class? Can it just be over so we can be at the university fest already?” Seungmin leans across the table to flick your forehead gently.

“You’re more concerned about the university fest than passing your exams.”

“Okay, mean.” You say to him with a frown, looking around to see if anyone’s looking before flashing him a middle finger. He rolls his eyes, pushing your notes further towards you before speaking again. “I’m not wrong though.”

He pokes you with a pen to get your attention, telling you to focus up before he’s explaining the concepts to you again. You try better to understand them now, repeating some of the things he tells you and answering his follow-up questions to make sure you really understand.

The soft smile he gives you when you answer correctly is enough motivation to perfect your exam. He looks like such a boyfriend right now. Lending you his hoodie, tutoring you on your exams, leaning in and smiling that soft smile directed at you. It takes everything in your head not to daydream of what it’d be like if he was actually yours.

You have to remind yourself he isn’t yours. He’s just your best friend. Your stupid boyfriend material best friend.

Similarly, Seungmin’s telling himself to get it together. He needs to stay focused on the upcoming exams and stop thinking about what it’d feel like to be yours.

ten.

It goes like this for a few more days until midterms week rolls through. And even then, you’d hold yourself in the library after an exam to study for the next.

Sometimes you’d be joined by Winter, and sometimes Jisung and Changbin would tag along which usually resulted in you trying to muffle your laughter underneath sweater sleeves. Who knew you could sneak in 12 cups of coffee in the library before actually getting caught?

Ever since then, Jisung’s been banned from your study sessions with Seungmin.

Tomorrow’s the last day of your exams, and you’re at Seungmin and Jeongin’s dorm to eat dinner before you head out to the library for the last time.

Seungmin’s out to buy dinner so you’re left with Jeongin who keeps trying to pry into yours and Seungmin’s non-existent relationship. “But you’ve definitely made out before, right?” Your face grows redder and redder every second that Jeongin speaks and you hit him with their couch throw pillow to rebut.

“We have not!”

“You’re right. Seungmin would’ve never shut up about it. But like, why not? Just get it over with and kiss!”

“We’re just best friends.”

“That’s what they all say.” Jeongin turns his full attention at you, smirking to himself before he starts making kissing noises. “Oh Minnie, kiss me already!” He purposely changes the pitch of his voice to try and imitate yours and you pretend not to feel the warmth on your cheeks.

“I’m gonna end up killing you before Seungmin does.”

He acts as if he doesn’t hear your comment (threat) and continues to tease you. “Seungminie, please fu—“

“Oh my god, shut up!” You almost jump at the poor boy upon realizing what he’s about to say next, and Seungmin arrives just in time before you can strangle the life out of his roommate.

“Am I interrupting something?” He glances at the two of you with an eyebrow raised, placing down the takeout containers on the table and motioning for you to sit so you can eat already.

“I think you might’ve just saved my life.” You send another glare at Jeongin and he raises his hands in surrender.

Seungmin just chuckles at this, coming up to sit beside you before he’s distributing the containers to the three of you. “What did you even do that made her jump you?”

“Everything he does makes me want to jump him.” You bark, squinting your eyes at the boy seated across from you and Seungmin.

“Woah, woah. (Name), I don’t see you like that. So eager to jump me?” You scoff loudly at his response, flicking a plastic spoon in his direction.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding! We both know who you really want to jump.”

The plastic fork follows with the threat that if he doesn’t shut up, the hot soup from your noodles is gonna be next.

“Alright, both of you calm down and eat.” Almost instantly, Jeongin’s hunching over his chair, terrible posture leaned forward to start twisting the noodles around his chopsticks. Seungmin angles himself close to you so that your shoulders are brushing, leaning down and blowing on his food before he starts to eat as well.

You try and fail to hide a smile at the physical contact.

On your way to the library, you exchange reviewers to ask each other questions. It’s a good way to retain your memory on the concepts. Jeongin doesn’t seem to know any of the answers to his questions, and Seungmin makes that face exclusive to when he senses something horrible is going to happen — in this case, Jeongin’s grade on this subject.

“Don’t worry. God’s gonna give me a miracle tomorrow.”

“Did he tell you that?” You nudge Seungmin’s shoulder, laughing at their banter when Jeongin sticks his tongue out at your best friend.

“Of course you’re gonna pass your exams tomorrow. Pre-law students are nerds. You fit right in.” Jeongin snorts which earns him a smack from his roommate. “Do you wanna get kicked out of the dorms?”

The rest of the night falls smoothly with the three of you minding your own business (Jeongin instantly gets distracted by his phone). It’s only before midnight that you find Seungmin asleep in front of you, head resting on the wooden table of the library and eyes closed peacefully.

You glance at him and you almost feel bad you have to wake him up. Your heart flutters at the small smile gracing his lips, snapping a quick photo so you can go back to this moment forever.

You brush his skin gently, and a smile appears on his face. It’s soft, reserved, but it feels like everything to you. Something in the way he smiled at your touch has you feeling something you can’t quite identify. It makes your heart hurt in s good way.

“Minnie, wake up.” Your voice breaks him out of his nap. He glances up, sleep still evident in his eyes. Then, his dreamy smile returns.

“Sorry.” You apologize to the boy while he moves to tidy up his things. He must’ve fallen asleep while waiting for you to finish studying.

“Don’t apologize.” There’s that sincere, intense look in his eyes that makes sure to meet your gaze, so you know he’s being serious, yet his words are gently spoken. He doesn’t want you to feel bad. It was his choice to wait for you.

“Go straight to sleep when you get back, okay? I know you love pulling allnighters, but it’s not good for you.”

On normal circumstances, he’d protest, telling you that he was still able to get a good 4 hours of sleep, but the genuine concern swimming in your eyes has him sealing his mouth shut and nodding instead.

“Alright.”

Seungmin finds he’d do anything for you.

eleven.

After you finish your last test, you get a text from Seungmin telling you to come to JYP Diner.

He explains that the boys wanted to eat together after completing the midterm exams, and that you should try inviting Ryujin and Winter as well (Chaeryeong was already there as she shared her last exam schedule with Minho).

You reply that Winter had retired for the day, and that Ryujin still had an exam later this afternoon. He tells you to hurry up and get your ass to the diner.

As soon as you open the door, Seungmin’s eyes land on you and the annoyed look on his face melts into a fond smile. He’s quick to get up, greeting you by the door before wrapping his arm around your shoulder to draw you to where they were seated.

The inside of the diner is warm and pleasant. You’re thankful for the differing scenery of the calm diner compared to the stress of your university.

The boys and Chaeryeong wave at you when you make it to the table, and you fall on the empty seat right next to your best friend.

“Oh, (name). You should’ve heard him when you were still on your way here.” Minho quips, grin growing when Seungmin kicks him from under the table.

“Why’s (name) taking so long?”

“Has (name) texted you guys?”

The rest of the boys join in, overexaggerating their imitation of Seungmin’s words from earlier. Barely concealed laughters echo around your booth when your best friend shoots them a friendly show of his middle finger before he shushes them, asking you what you wanted to eat as everyone else had already ordered.

“Hey, where’s Felix?” You only now notice the boy’s absence, and Hyunjin snorts in response.

“Immediately fell asleep after his Advanced Calculus exam. He was actually in tears while studying for it last night.”

“Just like Jeongin then.” Seungmin earns a rather harsh nudge from Jeongin. “That was supposed to be a secret!”

There’s a gentle smile eating at your lips once your food arrives and your sleep-deprived friends start gobbling up the food as if they were sentenced to life and this was their last meal. There’s always that unidentifiable feeling of comfort when you’re with them, and you’re grateful to have found such friends.

“What’s wrong?” Seungmin asks you quietly, noticing that you haven't started eating yet. Humming, you shake your head with the same small smile on your face.

“It’s nothing.”

Your after-exam celebration is continued over teasing and conversations about the university festival, and one by one, everyone starts excusing themselves to go back home. As usual, Seungmin walks you home.

He doesn’t let you walk into your building immediately upon arrival, asking you to wait for a moment. You comply, tilting your head with an amused smile on your face.

He’s rummaging through his bag now, looking for something before he pulls out two… tickets? He shoves one in your direction and it takes you a while to realize it’s a ticket to the university festival concert. They weren’t even selling yet, and when they did, it sold out pretty fast.

“How did you…?”

“Chan’s part of the student organizers.”

You immediately jump to coddle the boy in your arms, squeezing his rather larger body and pressing your cheek on his chest as you repeatedly say ‘thank you’. Your eyes are squeezed shut from beaming too much and your smile’s a little crooked from how genuine it comes out.

Seungmin can’t properly tell you that it’s no problem. He finds his words jumbled up because the sight he’s subjected to is so… beautiful. He’s blushing and somehow it’s making you blush too.

There’s something tucked beneath your smile, a certain kind of shyness in the way your eyes crinkle. It’s beautiful, as it always has been, but there was something about it that had Seungmin staring at your lips and back at your eyes. It’s like he’s being pulled in, and he’s unaware that he’s slowly and slowly minimizing the gap between you.

Just when he’s about to bite the bullet, an unknown voice startles him.

“Is that the little menace?”

Fucking hell.

Karen’s marching her way down the steps to where Seungmin’s standing, and you know it’s time he goes before Karen catches up to the boy.

“I guess I’ll see you later.” You laugh, but there’s that hint of shyness again, of being flustered as you wave at him. And then, you turn around to head inside your building.

Seungmin bolts back to his dorms, and he spends the rest of the afternoon thinking about what could’ve happened if goddamn Crazy Karen would’ve just kept her mouth shut.

twelve.

The university festival comes really fast, and you’re more than excited to spend it with your friends.

“Give me one second.” Chaeryeong’s gathering products from her desk and makeup bag, gathering them up on the floor and telling you to sit still as she rummages through her multiple tubes and brushes.

She maneuvers your head so you’re facing her before she slathers something on her palms, transferring the product to your face and rubbing it gently on your skin. A thin layer of concealer follows before she’s brushing powder on your face.

Earlier, you had asked if she could do your makeup for you and she excitedly replied with a ‘yes’ and a ‘come over right away’.

It’s how you find multiple brushes being dabbed on your face, hues of pink on your cheeks and a little on your nose before she’s patting a few glitters on the lids of your eyes. She lets you put on the mascara yourself so she doesn’t accidentally poke you with the wand (like she did the last time she did your makeup).

Then she’s on the search for the perfect shade of lipstick. “Let’s just put a little. Seungmin’s just gonna wipe it all off anyway when you two eventually kiss tonight.”

“Oh my god, Ryeong.”

“What! I’m not wrong.” She’s giggling as she tells you to part your lips slightly, applying the soft pink shade on your lips. “You look so pretty.” She coos more to herself, proud of her creation before she’s pinching your cheeks lightly.

She shoves a mirror to your face so you can reap the results of her hard work. She was right.

Chaeryeong did a wonderful job highlighting your natural features and letting the makeup work naturally on your face. You smile brightly, giving her a quick hug and showering her in ‘thank you’s.

“Okay, now get changed. Go, go! We’re gonna be late.”

When you step out, you’re met with the sight of Chaeryeong in a cute, sleeveless dress, leather jacket and fishnets. She looks stunning as she playfully turns around to show off her whole fit. “Damn, one chance?”

“Yeah, right. One chance with Seungmin, you mean.”

“Actually, I’d like to take a million chances with Seungmin.” She cracks into a fit of giggles. “You’re so down horrendous. Look, with the way you look, I’m sensing the first chance will be taken tonight.”

You give yourself a final do-over with Chaeryeong’s words, looking at yourself in the mirror. You’re wearing some loose slacks and a black tube top with a cream colored cardigan. For someone who didn’t have enough time to consult Winter and her amazing fashion sense, you’d say you did pretty well at dressing yourself prettily.

“Okay, okay. Come here, let me put lip gloss on you. I think some of the boys are here already.” You comply, letting her fix up some lip gloss on you before applying some on herself.

“They’re picking us up?”

“Yup. Minho, Jeongin, and Seungmin, I think?”

“Seungmin?” You thought you’d have more time to gather yourself and your feelings on the walk to the big field where all the booths were set up.

“Yeah, their dorm is nearest to mine. Come on.”

When you and Chaeryeong step out of her building, the boys are dramatically whistling and clapping their hands. Only when you’re near them do they spill their genuine compliments at the way you two look.

Seungmin’s knee-jerking reaction at seeing you so prettily dressed-up is to just stare at you unabashedly. There’s so much he wants to say, but his eyes remain glued open and his mouth shut.

“Yah, stop staring.” Minho smacks the back of Seungmin’s head and he’s stuttering out for something to say. He wants to tell you that you look beautiful, wants to say something charming to woo you over but he’s left with his mouth parted.

You just laugh at their exchange, taking your spot next to Seungmin as the five of you start walking to the big field. Seungmin looks so painfully attractive with his white shirt and jeans and converse and varsity jacket. He looks like the epitome of a boyfriend – so painfully dashing but also very painfully out of your league.

Meanwhile, Seungmin’s still kicking himself over for not being able to tell you how beautiful he thinks you look. He’s just hoping he’s presented with another opportunity to tell you – and he hopes by then, he’ll have enough courage to say it.

Earlier today, Jeongin and Minho gave him quite the heart-to-heart talk and convinced him to confess his feelings tonight. Besides, as they said, it was the perfect opportunity.

“You like her. You have for like a few years now. Stop being a pussy and tell her.” Minho’s words are rather straightforward. Jeongin groans before punching his arm.

Minho grabs at his arm, shrugging his shoulders before continuing to snack on the chips he had stolen.

“I’m not telling her.” Seungmin mutters to the boys, dejected. “I’m gonna ruin our friendship.”

“How sure are you?” Minho is stubborn as he continues to push Seungmin. “I’m not. But I don’t want to know.”

This time, Jeongin interjects. “Are you sure you don’t want to know? How would you live with yourself if she liked you all along and you let go of that chance so easily?”

“I won’t.”

“Exactly. No one lives a happy life entirely within their comfort zone. If you like her so much then she’s worth dragging yourself out of that zone.” Seungmin stiffens at his roommate’s words, mind racing to truly think about what he’s saying.

Since when did Jeongin get so wise?

As if Minho was thinking the same thing, he narrows his eyes before staring at the youngest of the group. “You got something you wanna share with the class? How come you know so much about asking someone out?”

“The two of you are just stupid. Anyways, just do it.”

The waters Jeongin’s treading on are dangerous, but well worth it if it meant Seungmin’s genuine happiness. He thinks it’s time Seungmin ripped off the poor excuse of a bandaid he taped around his heart and deemed all good now.

“Yeah, or I’ll do it myself.” Minho throws him a sly grin, voice overflowing with mischief.

“Absolutely not.” Seungmin shakes his head in protest, eyes gaping in horror. He immediately grabs the bag of chips from Minho’s lap which the boy immediately tries to grab back. “What’re you gonna do to stop me?”

“Tell Chaeryeong how you wanted her to be your dance partner soooo bad with some screenshots of your messages to me.” Minho should’ve known better than to challenge the one boy that held multiple threats towards each one of them.

His argument was unfair because he and Jeongin were the only people he told that to. Minho’s mood darkens, pulling back the bag of chips with force and resigning from his evil plans of telling you how Seungmin feels about you.

Minho valued his pride more than anything else.

“Look, I’ll do it myself.” Seungmin huffs, rubbing the back of his neck and falling back on his bed to stare at the ceiling. “I think.”

Then, Minho’s phone buzzes from right next to him.

“The girls are almost ready. Let’s start walking.”

thirteen.

When the five of you arrive, most of your friends are already there.

Chan’s the first one that sees you.

“Finally.” He greets you and Chaeryeong with a big hug before bumping his fists with the boys. What is it with men and their fist bumps?

Before you can mingle with the rest of the group, Chan leans in discreetly (or at least, as discreet as he could) and whispers to the boys. “Watch out if you’re wearing shoes. Ryujin’s been messing with everyone’s shoelaces the moment we got here.”

You laugh at his warning. Ryujin’s actually such a menace.

“That sounds just about right.” You pat him in the back before going in to give Ryujin a hug. Her face immediately lights up when she sees you and Chaeryeong, wrapping an arm around the both of you as she starts to move away from the boys.

“Ryujin has more rizz than you.”

“I’m not talking to someone who cried while studying Advanced Calculus.”

“Noted.” Felix instantly shuts up, moving to talk about another topic with Hyunjin who's laughing his ass off at Seungmin’s response at the poor boy.

“We’re just waiting on Changbin, Winter, and… Jisung?”

Chan’s head counting the group, pointing at each person and mentally noting down the numbers, making sure that no one was missing. You remember the time Felix had accidentally joined in with Beomgyu’s friend group when he thought he was following Seungmin’s feet. Chan almost lost his mind.

The timing couldn’t be more perfect when they show up from a distance. Jisung seems to be talking Winter’s ear off and Changbin’s trying to pull him back. Winter looks a bit overstimulated with his level of energy, but divulges in the conversation anyway. Jisung appreciates it. You smile at how easy your friends got on with Seungmin’s friends.

Felix excitedly points at the arcade booths lining up, some shooting games, prize wheels, virtual reality. Everyone else reciprocates the excitement, immediately running up to the booths and getting in line. Meanwhile, Jeongin’s dragging Minho at the claw machine. He’s always been notorious for having luck when it came to the claw machine games, and Jeongin was taking his chances the moment he found a bread plushie in the glass case.

“Get it yourself.”

“Chaeryeong!”

Minho shuts him up with a bread plushie he immediately wins for Jeongin. The youngest boy happily holds his prize and keeps his mouth shut.

Chan easily wins Ryujin whatever she asks for in exchange for her leaving his shoelaces alone. Ryujin is easily bribed when it comes to food and free prizes and she knows Chan would probably win most of the games she wanted. Jisung and Changbin were comparing their strengths and boasting about their muscles by the punching machine, and Chaeryeong’s dominating the shooting games with Winter.

“Oh my god, the Sunshine Harvest has a booth. I’ll be back.” Before anyone from the group can accompany you, you’re running towards the direction of the booth. Seungmin understands your rush. Their mango shakes were probably on the way to selling out fast if you didn’t get there sooner.

When you don’t return in the next 20 minutes, Seungmin is sweating frantically. He knows you can handle yourself, but there was now a chock full of new people who had just arrived and were littering the area. It’s when you don’t pick up his calls that tips him over.

“I’m gonna go look for (name).” Chan nods understandingly, and Seungmin disappears in a flash. He thanks his parents for his height at this very moment, scanning through the groups of people and excusing himself so he can navigate towards the Sunshine Harvest booth.

His heart drops to his stomach when he doesn’t see you there. But just when he’s about to panic some more, he spots someone hunched over to the very far left, away from the crowd, discarded mango shake container to the side. He practically leaps out of the bench he’s standing on, jogging in your direction.

He doesn’t have the heart to scold you when he finds you playing with Mushroom.

“(Name).” You jump back at the sudden voice, but instantly smile upon realizing it’s just Seungmin. You finally say goodbye to the cat, grabbing your empty bottle before standing up. “Sorry, did I take too long?”

“No, it’s okay.” You just don’t have to know how frantic he was while he was looking everywhere for you.

On the way back to your friends, you don’t realize his hand is glued to the small of your waist so he doesn’t lose you again.

When the group decides to split up, Minho and Jeongin are instantly sending Seungmin stupid dirty looks with their stupid wiggling eyebrows. He knows if he doesn’t confess tonight, Minho might actually do it for him.

The rest of the afternoon goes by so fast. You applaud the university and the student body for organizing the fest. The afternoon transitions to night so smoothly, you don’t even realize the amount of time that passed by.

The bright lights and the loud music is so exhilarating, and it makes you feel so alive — the most alive you’ve felt in the week. There are times when you dance along to the music, exaggerating your movements and Seungmin laughs with his head rolled back and you’d embarrass yourself over and over to keep hearing him laugh.

Seungmin takes the weight off your chest so easily. All he does is pat your head and squeeze your cheeks and accompany you wherever you wish to go and suddenly, you feel lighter. Happier. And it is so, so loud. Everyone around you is talking, crowded together but you can’t hear them. All you can focus on is the feeling of his hand in yours to make sure he doesn’t lose you in the crowd and the way it fits perfectly. Like his hand was meant to be crafted to hold yours.

It’s how you continue to feel when you find yourselves amongst the crowd of the concert, pretending to know the lyrics of the songs playing, screaming at each other when you actually recognize the song. Everything you do with him is something you wish you could capture in a photo.

He’s singing, and you look at him with a silent glee in your eyes, hoping to touch the same greatness that Kim Seungmin always held and hoping to burn the memory of his singing and his soft eyes and his hand in yours. You almost feel like flying.

His eyes are warm when you look at them, golden brown peeking down at you with fondness. You’ve always loved his eyes the most. It has always been his most obvious tell — of the things they feel and the things they’ve made you feel when he stared at you a little longer than normal.

Your lips quirk up in a smile, and you find yourself singing along to the songs with him. You were never the greatest singer, but with him, you felt like loveliest melodies and tunes flow out of you comfortably.

This time, Seungmin allows himself a quick glance at you from his peripheral vision, admiring your naturally dusted cheeks and your beaming eyes and your messed up hair from the wind and from running around all night. How could you stand there and sing without a care in the world and smile and look so, so beautiful.

And there are many things Seungmin considers to be beautiful. He loves the sunrise and the sunsets and the way the sky blends into a perfect mix of colors along the horizon before the moon chases the sun away. He loves the flowers and the trees on his way to his classes and the wind’s breeze wrapping you in a cold blanket. He loves the stars and their relentless twinkling and how they coat the night sky, making sure the moon is never lonely. But above all, he loves you and your smile and the way you chew on your lips when you think and how you make him feel like he can touch the sky.

Seungmin finds he’d sacrifice the sunset and sunrise and the twinkling stars if it meant he could call you and all of you, his.

He doesn’t say anything when he drops his varsity jacket on your shoulders and he doesn’t meet your eyes when you look up at him to thank him.

You make Seungmin trip over his own words. All tangled in adoration and longing. Between all the galaxies and universes, Seungmin concludes he’s lucky to have landed under the same stars as you.

With all this in mind, Seungmin’s sure he’s upgraded way beyond the like. He’s in love with you — in the hopeless, clumsy, exhilarating kind of way. And he finds that loving you is something he wants to experience no matter the outcome.

If he was told you’d never feel the same and if he’d still take the chance to fall in love with you, he’d say yes. It’s a yes again and again and again. Always a yes. He’d prefer the unrequited over never knowing how it feels to love you and every part of you.

“(Name)?”

Despite the loudness of the music and the fireworks and the people around you, you find Seungmin’s voice cut through them all.

Looking up at him, you find him looking at you in a way he never has done before. In the way he’s done so many times when you weren’t looking. There’s something swirling in his eyes, some kind of longing and desire.

I've been alone for too long

You've been there all along

The distance between you is closing. Seungmin’s heart is racing when he peels his hand from yours in favor of cradling your cheek gently, tracing along your jaw and soaking in every detail about your face.

Ethereal love

I will choose you now and everyday

Seungmin’s putting everything on the line, stepping into the unknown, heartbeat pounding in his ears. There’s still time for you to pull away, to run away from the certainty he feels about you, to shatter him into a million pieces.

He hopes you won’t.

His eyes flutter shut, but when he opens them again, you’re already gone.

fourteen.

It’s the first time Seungmin doesn’t blow up your notifications.

Jeongin confiscates his phone when he comes home to Seungmin downing a bottle of vodka. He’s immediately concerned for his roommate’s wellbeing and what could’ve led to Seungmin’s sudden want to get drunk.

“Hey, what happened?” He sits on the ground to accompany Seungmin, grabbing the bottle when he sees that it’s almost empty.

“Let me sulk properly.” Then, he’s grabbing the bottle back from Jeongin, chugging down the remains before harshly setting it down on the ground. A sharp sigh leaves his throat before he leans in to rest his head on Jeongin’s shoulder. And he sits there and lets him.

Jeongin lets him because Seungmin needed someone right now. “I fucked up, Innie.”

It’s the most fragile Jeongin’s ever heard from his roommate and he takes Seungmin’s hand to let him know that he’s listening. “Tried to kiss (name). I ruined everything.”

Jeongin’s face twists in confusion, heart rising in his own throat. He knows you like Seungmin back. And if Seungmin tried to kiss you, he would’ve thought the result of that would be a very happy phone call from his roommate – not him drinking until he forgets.

Seungmin feels pathetic, and Jeongin swears to get to the bottom of things. With sleepy fucked up eyes, Seungmin looks up at the boy, chin tilted up and lips quivering. “Do you think she’ll forgive me?”

“I know she will. Come here.” Seungmin bows his head faintly, head falling on Jeongin’s chest as he allows himself to be hugged – allows himself to be vulnerable and to feel because it’s something that doesn’t need to be taught, but needs to be remembered over and over again.

Jeongin wraps his arms around the boy. Seungmin attempts to swat his arms away, the way he’s used to, but he thinks it feels quite nice to be hugged.

He had downed the pain and was begging for the temporary buzz to kick in all while his fingers are clenched on the fabric of Jeongin’s shirt and his tears are leaving a wet spot where his face is pressed against.

There’s a burn in his heart, just under his chest and it’s squeezing so tightly. When he closes his eyes, all he sees is you and he cries a little more. Is this what it felt like to have someone to lose?

Even if he knows you won’t let his feelings get in between your friendship, the unrequitedness of the feelings Seungmin has held for years is dawning on him and it is so, so painful.

Jeongin shoots you a quick text to meet him tomorrow.

fifteen.

You wake up to a text from Jeongin which is how you know you’ve truly fucked up now.

You didn’t mean for it to happen, and you feel horrendous.

You’re honestly not even sure how it happened. What a grief it is that your memory works the way they do and how you don’t remember how it felt to have his face so close to yours. It deprives you of the memory of his eyes and his lips, and they let go of the feeling of his hand in yours while you watched the fireworks.

The human brain is beautiful, but how dare it cost the sound of his voice and the feeling of his hands cradling your face.

In hindsight, you know you shouldn’t have run away. But you were afraid. You were afraid it was just a heat of the moment thing and Seungmin didn’t actually want to kiss you. Were you the one that came onto him? Did you initiate the kiss?

Everything had felt so right before the fear settled in. You’ve been left with questions that were never answered before, all the voices in your head you’ve shut out for so long screaming at you. Was this how it felt to have someone to lose?

You bury your face in your hands in frustration. Did you ruin years of friendship because you wanted to know how his lips felt like on yours?

You’re not sure what you’re thinking when you walk towards where Jeongin tells you to meet up, but you do know you’re immediately regretting it. Especially when you see a familiar figure walking towards where you’re standing.

“I – I have to go.” You blurt out the moment you see him. “I’m sorry. I have to.. I need to be somewhere.” You feel selfish – walking away from him because you’re not ready to hear his rejection.

“Wait, (name). Let me explain myself.”

You don’t want to hear it. You don’t want to hear the words you’d been dreading to hear.

Backed up by your one-sided feelings, you turn yourself around and your fingers tighten around the sleeves of the jacket you’re wearing, and you shake your head as you try to quicken your pace so you can get out of there as soon as you can.

“I’ve been in love with you since we were eighteen.”

His sudden confession stops you in your tracks.

You find it physically impossible to turn around and look at him. Trembling lips are so easy to discern, especially on Seungmin.

“(Name), please… please look at me.” You will yourself to look at him, and when you brave eye contact, you notice his lips trembling in trial of a smile. But it’s sad, it’s so sad and his lips start to quiver. It’s difficult to ignore the crack in his whispers and the pain in his transparent eyes.

“I feel like I’m losing you.” The words taste bitter on his tongue. He knows exactly why.

They’re words he never thought he’d ever utter in his lifetime, and now that he’s saying them, the reality is hitting him much harder.

“Did I do something wrong? Was it because I tried to kiss you?” Seungmin’s having difficulty speaking, especially with the lump in his throat and the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. He hasn’t cried in such a long time. “I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.”

He sounds ashamed, and the break in his voice does nothing to disguise his guilt.

You hate that. You hate that you made Seungmin feel this way over one big misunderstanding. His confession repeats in your head over and over and you feel the buildup of bile in your stomach when you realize you’ve hurt Seungmin.

Your mouth dries. There’s so much you want to tell him, but you find no words escape your throat. It feels like there are fingers being shoved down your throat.

Before you can push down the nausea, Seungmin breaks eye contact. His heart is beating incredibly fast and he thinks he’s fucked up with you further by confessing his repressed emotions – confessing his feelings he was so practiced in hiding.

A spell of dizziness sends Seungmin tumbling backwards, heart racing and palms sweating. He looks at you, studying your expression, and the silence feels like it goes on for too long and he thinks he’s made a mistake.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

His sorry feels a lot like he’s saying goodbye.

Seungmin disappears in the blink of an eye.

sixteen.

It’s the first time in a long time that you’re the one blowing up his notifications.

He doesn’t reply to your texts. Granted it’s 3AM and the poor boy is probably asleep.

You’ve been tossing and turning for the past few hours, unable to catch even a wink of sleep with the amount of thoughts racing in your mind. The image of Seungmin, of his red eyes, of his tears, emerges from the night around you. It stubbornly laments, refusing you any form of peace. You deserve it.

Overwhelming sadness stunned you, shadowing over Seungmin’s confession. You don’t allow his words to linger. It’s incredibly unfair to feel hope when Seungmin’s out there feeling his most hopeless.

You’re about to turn again, forcing your eyes shut when the familiar ringtone of Facetime echoes from your phone. Almost immediately, you’re leaping off your bed, grabbing your phone from the nightstand.

Oh.

It’s Winter.

“Alright, what’s wrong?” You stare at her through the screen of your phone, and it looks like she’s making herself comfortable. She’s seated on her lazy boy chair, blankets bunched up around her shoulders and a mug of something steaming by her side.

“What?”

“I was gonna walk over to your building, but it’s 3am and I am not about to die just so I can come over and hug you. I’ll do that tomorrow.”

Your heart melts at Winter’s observance. She notices, even if it’s the most minuscule little thing. Winter always notices, and unlike the insincerity pouring from other people when they say they’re only one call away, Winter actually is. She’s one call, one text, one anything away.

“Come on, talk to me.” So you do. You tell her everything from the start. The very start.

You tell her that from the moment you met Seungmin, your mind had started crafting a romance story, even if you didn’t know it yet. He was working part-time at a coffee shop, and you’re not exactly sure how it happened, but you remember the cold sensation of coffee all over you and a promise to make it up to you. When he introduced himself, he shook your hand.

His hand felt like warm cookies dipped in milk.

And you tell her ever since then, you spent almost every day getting to know Seungmin and his love for the sunrise and the sunset and how passionate he is about singing but rarely ever does it in front of people and how he is repulsed by physical touch but never really minds when it’s with you. He’s still the same boy you met in that coffee shop, albeit he walks more confidently now. He grew into his features and had a broader back now, but he was still the same boy whose hand you held on the way to his dentist appointment. He was still the Kim Seungmin who smiled at you so brightly when he got his braces removed, and continued to smile at you today.

It’s been a long way since that coffee shop, but he’s remained to be the one true constant in your life. You’re convinced you were always destined to meet him. You reason it’s because you’d be a completely different person now if it wasn’t for him. If you hadn’t met at that coffee shop, you’re convinced Whoever Is Above would’ve found a way for you to meet over and over and over again.

Everything carries you to him, as if everything that exists were little boats that sailed directly to him — to where he was waiting. To where he’s still waiting.

And then you tell her about the night of the festival. How you almost kissed him, and how you regret every second after for not just pressing your lips on his. You tell her of his confession, and how you love him tenfold, even before you knew what love was.

Loving Seungmin was the easiest thing you’ve ever had to do. It was falling in love with his eyes and the sound of his laughter and the little things he reserves for you and for your eyes only.

“Why’d you run away?” It was a valid question. You don’t even know yourself.

“I guess I was just scared.” You hesitate with your answer, putting your arms around you and staring at nothing in particular.

“He loves you.”

“I didn’t know.”

And in hindsight, maybe you should’ve. When you look back for a sign that Seungmin’s loved you all along, you end up finding it interwoven in his teasing. He left so many signs, and you didn’t see a single one.

There was love in his long, overbearing messages — telling you to eat, asking you about your day, scolding you for worrying him. There was love in his phone calls, in keeping you company in whatever you did because he knows you don’t like the silence very much. The quiet left you alone in your head, and you despised feeling lonely. Love echoed in your laughter and reflected in your smiles even if your jokes weren’t funny. There was love, even in the tiktoks he sent you with the small comment of “us”. It was in the dinners you shared and in the absence of words because he just understood.

Maybe that’s what love is. Maybe this is what Kim Seungmin’s heart feels like. His love was never made up of grand gestures, it was always in the little things that told you his life is so intertwined with yours.

There was always love all along.

There still is.

“He just knows me so well, I thought he could never see me romantically after getting to know all my bad sides.”

“Being known is being loved.” Winter’s words linger in your head as you play a flashback of your years with Seungmin, replaying all the scenes.

Being known is being loved.

Everything hits you all at once. When he got you that mango shake you loved so much and complained about because it sells out so fast. When you saw the campus dogs and cats that one night, and how he remembered what you said. When he knows you’re deep in thought just because you were chewing at your lips. When he recalls the gift you got a few Christmases ago because it made you so happy. When he lets you borrow the hoodies you mentioned were your favorite. When he memorizes your coffee order by heart.

Love never needed to have the tsunamis and the thunderstorms. Love is just… love. It’s just the quietness, the stillness, the calm. Sometimes, it doesn’t have to feel like a million lightning strikes. It just has to feel like finally letting out that one breath you’ve been holding on for too long.

Being known is being loved.

“I have to talk to him.”

“I know.”

“I love him.”

“I know.”

“And he loves me.”

“He loves you.”

seventeen.

It isn’t even 8am when you’re pacing back and forth in front of his dorms.

You know Seungmin usually wakes up early, but you’re unsure of his sleeping patterns as of recently. You haven’t been given the privilege to know, so you text Jeongin.

Your fingers drum nervously on the side of your thighs, feet shuffling as you stare at their gate, thinking that any moment, he could walk out.

Last night, you practiced will-induced self conversations over how you were going to approach Seungmin today. You concluded it best not to practice anything you wanted to tell him. You owed him your honesty and a genuine, sincere undertone in your words and apology.

In all honesty, the moment you had arrived within the vicinity of their dorms, you had contemplated whether you should just continue right. Maybe you could just order an iced Americano at a cafe to remind you of Seungmin. Confrontation never came easy to you. But the thought of being an absentee in his life forever scared you and willed you to take the few steps forward towards the entrance of their dorms.

However, it’s been a good ten minutes since you arrived, and those ten minutes are not the most kind when you’re feeling nervous and about to throw up. It really leaves a lot of room for thinking, and right now it’s thinking that Seungmin wants absolutely nothing to do with you anymore because he thought you were so repulsed by the idea of him loving you and kissing you (even though you felt quite the opposite).

Just when you were about to take a step backward and contemplate the rest of your life, Jeongin walks out of the building pulling a still very sleepy and very disoriented Seungmin behind him.

“Okay, kiss and make up.” Jeongin clasps his hands together before pointing a threatening finger at you. “Don’t mess this up again.” And then he’s on his way back to the inside of their dorm building (peeking through their windows from time to time).

The first thing you discern is his incredibly puffy eyes. From sleeping or crying? You don’t know. And then it’s his pathetic attempt to smile even though he doesn’t feel like it. Seeing him like this, because of you, makes you want to fall on your knees and weep.

Your eyes trail to the rest of him – his messy hair, his slumped shoulders, his slightly shaking hands. The instinct to hold it is strong, you know it always manages to calm him down. But you don’t.

“(Name).” His voice sounds thick and heavy, looking at your eyes for a second before looking back down on the pavement. You recognize the pitch of his voice. He was sad and unsure.

You take a few steps forward, letting out a breath you didn’t know you were holding when he meets your eyes again. It has the same look the day he confessed to you. The same tilting of his head ever so slightly, albeit a little more tired and a little less hopeful. His eyes look like they’re filled with quiet thoughts, looking at you gently even though you had shattered them.

Seungmin, for the first time in a long time, looks regretful.

“Seungmin, I wanted to… I… I’m sorry.” He simply nods his head, sucking in a shark breath as he thinks this was it. This was the rejection he’d been dreading to hear.

“It’s okay.” He murmurs, your apology threatening to send a new wave of tears in his eyes. “I shouldn’t have said what I said especially when I know you don’t feel the same.”

“Wait, what? No… no. Seungmin, that’s not it.”

There’s a long pause before you speak again.

“I just… dd you really mean it? What you said yesterday?”

Seungmin cringes at himself, but the red blossoming on his cheeks and the way his features soften when he remembers his words give him away. With a defeated sigh, he runs a hand through his hair.

“Yes.” He admits, an unknown feeling swelling in the pit of his stomach.

That’s all you needed to hear.

Placing your palms on each side of his face, you pull him towards you in what you thought would be a romantic show of your feelings.

Instead, you underestimate his height and your lips crash into his nose instead. Seungmin stiffens in surprise, at the sudden proximity of your face to his and the accidental kiss you pressed on his nose, and then he laughs.

Seungmin laughs in the hopeless, clumsy, breathless, exhilarating kind of laugh that sends your cheeks flushing and your heart fluttering because you’ve missed that laugh so much.

He was never sure he acted right that night, that he wasn’t being selfish. But with your palms in his cheeks and your eyes reciprocating the same love all along, he knows he did the right thing. So, with a gentle sigh of relief, he tilts his head and presses his lips against yours.

Seungmin feels like he can finally breathe again. He kisses you with every love and affection he’s kept hidden for years and years.

You were venturing into the void of the unknown again, kissing your best friend, but it feels safe. There wasn’t that fear of the uncharted. There was only comfort as it always has been with him. The weight of happiness is so overwhelming, and Seungmin thinks there’s nothing more beautiful than kissing you after years of longing.

When the both of you pull away, the feeling of his arms around your waist and his forehead pressed against yours and the fond look on his face sends you toppling over. This was the image of your dreams.

He mirrors the soft smile on your face, hand moving to trace your face and your jaw before placing another kiss on your nose, and your cheek, and the corner of your lips. Your skin tingles at the way his lips and his warm breath tickles you, and your heart skips a bit when you realize you don’t mind feeling this every day for the rest of your life.

“Can I hear you say it?” He doesn’t need to say it for you to understand.

“I love you.”

Seungmin feels wholeheartedly content, heart bursting and ears burning red at hearing you utter those three words he’s dreamt about.

“I’ve loved you since you begged me to come with you to your dentist appointment.”

And then he laughs again, pressing his pointer finger on your forehead with a slight betrayal in his eyes.

“You’re telling me I could’ve kissed you for years now?” He speaks in exaggeration, and you know he’s truly thinking about it.

“You have all the time in the world now.”

“You know what? I like the sound of that.” He moves his hands from your face in favor of wrapping them around your waist – pulling you in the type of hug where you can completely relax against him and melt into his familiar intimacy. The one that’s been there all along, although a little held back.

You don’t know what’s next. With the vastness and unpredictability of the earth you stand on, you don’t know what follows. The busy morning highway is starting to fill your ears, and the sound of lives starting echos from afar. Somewhere in the distance, someone’s phone rings and there’s a sound of laughing and running from students alike.

You find that in the chorus of laughter and honking horns and ringtones, the world is telling you that you don’t have to know what’s next. All you need to know is the inhale and exhale and the quietness that Seungmin’s heart offers.

He’ll be here for a long time, continuing to know and know and know and love you.

eighteen.

8:24am

jeongin: FUCKING FINALLY

minho: ????

chan: language

8:25am

jeongin: (sent a picture)

hyunjin: oh my god????

changbin: our seungmin’s a big boy now

jisung: wdym i wont have to hear seungmin’s mopy ass anymore

chaeryeong: ^^ same with yn :(( but also so happy lol

8:26am

ryujin: EVERYONE CHEERED

jeongin: everyone say thank you jeongin

winter: u mean thank u winter???

hyunjin: felix is crying again

chan: WHY

felix: love is beautiful

changbin: me and who

note. hi hi thank u for making it to the very end of my first ever stray kids fic. i hope you ended up enjoying the ride ^_^ lmk what u thought and who i should write for next!

#k-labels #seungmin x reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids x you #kim seungmin x reader #stray kids oneshot #stray kids fic #stray kids seungmin #skz x reader #skz x you #skz x reader fic #skz fanfic #skz seungmin #seungmin x you #seungmin x y/n #college au #kim seungmin #seungmin fanfic #seungmin fic

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penelopeswifey · 2 months ago

Text

ACCIDENTALLY YOURS !

CHAPTER 1 —

I should've stayed in bed.. forever!

A/N: HII chapter 1.. sorry for the long wait!!.. pretty short 😢

You woke up today, actually feeling pretty well rested.. You've somehow forgotten the events of last night and was looking outside the window, admiring the view.

Today's gonna be a good day.

—Well, it would've been a good day. If you didn't check your phone..

Opening twitter, your hands were shaking. You tried to comfort yourself, reassuring that it can't be that bad.

It can't be that bad, It can't be that bad, it can't be that bad, It can't be that bad.

Oh.

You looked at the tweets in horror, no way. No way. No way you got your whole reputation destroyed because of a simple hobby!

There is no way your returning to the internet after this, your whole career, dignity and reputation just fell apart. This is way too fucking embarassing. Good thing you never deleted your job application for Applebee's..

—

ACCIDENTALLY YOURS!

SYPNOSIS: You, a well-known streamer, have always kept your two hobbies separate. By day, you entertain thousands with your snarky commentary, but by night, you secretly write. fanfiction about your favorite idol, Balladeer. It was a guilty pleasure—until a late-night stream led to a slip of the tongue and exposed your secret to the world!

In a single moment of poor judgment and a misclick, which by the way was totally not your fault!.. I think.. clips and memes about you spread like wildfire! It was embarrassing enough for everyone to know about your fanfiction, but it spiraled down even further when they discovered you were writing about the very idol you constantly claimed was overrated.

Just as you wallowed in self-pity, a notification pings on your phone. A familiar username and a blue checkmark.

Oh.

accidentally yours masterlist : chapter 2 —>

———

taglist:

@kaeuri @kazumiku @kyouzki @skyoverkill1 @flowzel @lalalaloveallmydays @sketcheeee @vi0let-writes @kunikuzushis-darling @js-a-silly-little-guy @simonisferal @jayzioxx @naevis-callingae @vxmp-loml @dxrling-xing @suzueuieeeee @kinanahana @help-whatdoimakemyusername @khisuko @dearanemo @heusalettle

#penelopeswifey #accidentallyyours #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin fanfic #genshin smau #smau #self insert #scaramouche smau #scaramouche #kunikuzushi #kunikuzushi x reader #wanderer #wanderer x reader #scaramouche x you #social media au #genshin impact x you #genshin #scaramouche x yn

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jjunieworld · 11 months ago

Text

21. half alive ⸝ ˚⋆

↳ mainly written, some texts. word count: 1.9k

the first thing you realized when you woke up was not the fact that you were in a foreign room and weren’t sure how you got there, but the fact that your head was absolutely killing you.

you looked around the empty room and found that you were on a couch. sitting up almost took you back out. your head spun so badly and the bright daylight wasn’t helping at all.

there were two pills, a bottle of water, and a note on the table in front of you. take both as soon as you wake up, you’re gonna need it. i confiscated your bottle, read the note. you did as you were told as you tried to remember how you got here, your fingers pinching the bridge of your nose.

suddenly last night's events came flooding back into your mind like a hurricane. it hit you so hard you sat back on the couch and banged your head off the wall behind it. you were alone in taehyun’s dorm.

you let out a sigh as you went to stand. you were definitely hungover.

it took you a while to get back to your dorm, thankfully the hallways were empty. you really wished you brought a jacket with you. you were still in your birthday dress and heels from yesterday and it was not fun to try and get around in.

before you even got to walk fully through the door to your room you were immediately taken into the arms of your friends. “jesus, y/n. you scared the shit out of us. please don’t ever do that again,” kai said.

you were guided to your bed. “i’m sorry,” you replied. you suddenly felt like you were gonna cry again. as you looked around at your friends, you saw that their eyes were red and it looks like they didn’t sleep a wink all night.

“don’t be sorry. none of this is your fault,” said yeonjun.

“where were you?” yunjin asked. you recalled the events after you ran as best as you could with your clouded brain. after, there was a moment of silence. you apologized again.

“y/n… it’s okay,” jake said. you leaned your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes briefly. you didn’t keep them closed for long. everytime you shut your eyes you saw that video. you saw everyone smiling at you, sakura’s words. and worst of all, you saw him. the look of horror on his face and the way his voice cracked when he finally spoke to you.

you dug the heels of your palms into your eyes, forgetting about the fact that you were still wearing makeup.

you pulled out your phone and turned it on as your friends spoke between each other.

“it turns out everyone on the fourth floor of the party were in on the whole thing,” jake started. “one of my classmates showed me the invitations sakura sent out. the next time i see her im gonna kill her.” you breathed deeply at that.

“i should’ve smacked the shit out of her too while i had the chance,” yunjin added. you turned to her, a puzzled look on your face.

“oh yeah, y/nie! soobin got tore the fuck up!” kai exclaimed, you flinched a little. not just from hearing his name but also because your head was still pounding. “sorry… redacted…” kai trailed off.

jake turned to you. “yeah! after you left, yunjin went up and smacked the shit out of him and then right after yeonjun just went in on him. his face is all fucked up.” you raised your eyebrows a little in shock and amusement.

“he deserved it, i would’ve done more if those fucking security guards didn’t pull me off,” yeonjun said.

before you got to reply, your phone finally finished turning on and a floodgate of notifications poured through. most of them were from your friends. two notifications stood out to you, one of them was a post on twitter sakura tagged you in.

you opened it and froze. yunjin took the phone from your hands and looked at it. a furious expression crossed her features. “that fucking bitch.” she showed it to the others and their faces went sour too.

you took your phone back from her and look through your notifications. you had a slew of texts from soobin that you decided you weren’t gonna look at right now. there was a new post from his twitter, which you had forgotten you had the notifications on for. it was song lyrics, with another tweet added that was for you. you inhaled sharply as you began scrolling through his social media, scouring it to see if there was some type of hint about everything that you’ve missed.

you didn’t get far. jake took your phone from you, claiming that going through his social media is just gonna do more harm than good. he was right, but your mind was still at unease. he scrolled through your phone a little and then sat it down.

“he’s blocked on everything now. you don’t have to worry about it,” jake said. you just nodded in response.

you reached up to touch your face to find that you were crying. your friends pulled you into a group hug and you cried even harder.

“i just… i just want to understand why…” you choked out through sobs. you felt your back being rubbed. “why would he do this to me?”

your friends let you cry your heart out for a while until you were too numb and too tired to shed anymore tears. your makeup was completely ruined now, not that it wasn’t already bad before. you didn’t care as you ran your hands over your face and saw them streaked with black after.

“i should’ve convinced you not to go to that party…” yeonjun suddenly said. his eyes were downcast and his knuckles were white as he held the hem of his shirt. you saw that there was dried blood on them.

“jjunie…” you trailed, shaking your head. he cut you off, “no. you wouldn’t be in the situation if i had. you wouldn’t have disappeared the whole night if i had.”

“if it never happened, we’d all be oblivious to the truth,” you spoke. hueningkai nodded in agreement. you dropped to the floor and leaned over and gave him a hug. “it’s nobody’s fault.”

“nobody’s but redacted’s…” yunjin muttered. you let out a sigh.

“i should've known something like this was gonna happen. i should’ve fucking known.” yeonjun spoke, slamming his hand on the ground. he leaned his head back on the boxspring of the bed. “they literally did something similar to me and i still didn’t see it coming until it was too late.”

you furrowed your brows at him. you still didn’t know the history he has with soobin and his friends.

“back when i was friends with them,” yeonjun started, “we were all really close, or so i thought. we were all planning on going to the same college, not this one, but a different one.” he rubbed his eyes as he sighed.

“the dean was a family friend of mine and so i said i’d put in a good word for them. once i praised them to the high fucking heavens it’s like a switch flipped. they used me. and after… after, they made sure everywhere i went a bad reputation followed me. it was a miracle i even got into this college.”

you held a hand to your mouth as he spoke. yeonjun let out a wry laugh, “and when my applications got declined and the dean stopped speaking to me and my family… it was all for nothing. all for them to end up right here at the same college as me. acting like they run the shit.”

you scooted over to where yeonjun sat and gave him a hug. your friends joined in with you. “i’m really sorry jjunie,” you said softly. he just shook his head a little.

“it’s in the past now. there’s nothing i can do to change it.” you all pulled away as he stood. “so, what’s the plan for today to get your mind off yesterday?” yeonjun asked.

standing to your feet, you held on to the edge of the bed for support. “i need to shower,” you announced. you felt disgusting and heavy with emotion. you needed a nice, long, hot shower to scrub yesterday’s events off of you. “and a nap.” you added.

your friends stood as well. “do you want us to wait here until you get out?” kai asked. you shook your head. “no, that’s okay. i really need a nap. and by the looks of it, you guys need one too.” your friends let out some small laughs.

“are you sure you want to be alone right now? we really don’t mind,” yunjin said. you nodded, “i’ll be okay, at least for the moment. go get some sleep and you can come back over if you want after or something.”

they reluctantly agreed and gave you one last hug before leaving your room. you sighed as you went to take a hot shower. you scrubbed your body raw and washed yourself over and over until you finally felt clean. you felt half alive as you moved around your room.

you froze as you were going to get dressed. one of soobin’s hoodies sat on top of your clothes. he must’ve accidentally left it when the two of you went to yeonjun’s yesterday. you brought it up to your face and inhaled. it still smelled like him.

sighing, you slipped in on and climbed in your bed, which also still smelled like him. you hated the fact that it brought you comfort. you reached for your phone and opened it.

you couldn’t even say he was the last person you wanted to see right now, because that would be a lie. despite everything that has happened, everything he’s done, he was still the person you wanted to see the most right now. and that broke you. all you could do right now was scroll through your camera roll and look at all the pictures and videos of the two of you, silently crying.

you wrapped the hoodie closer around yourself and buried your face down into it. all you could think about is the last time you laid in your bed. your bodies wrapped around each other. soobin telling you he loves you.

was it all a lie? all part of this elaborate plan? you went over all the moments you shared with him until you got to the very beginning.

did he even actually need your help that day? or was he just trying to make some money?

you scoffed to yourself. apparently, all you were worth to him was five hundred dollars and a quick fuck.

tears fell from your eyes. you made yourself open the messages he sent you last night.

i swear to you i’ve meant everything i’ve said to you.

bullshit. it was all just a fucking lie. you should’ve known. you should’ve fucking known. when has anything ever worked out for you?

at some point between your racing thoughts and mind numbing headache, you fell into a dreamless sleep.

masterlist.

summary: choi soobin has always been the popular kid surrounded by his popular friends. y/n… not so much. one night, soobin and his friends make bet that soobin can’t get y/n to date him in a month. unfortunately for y/n, they’re a hopeless romantic.

A/N: now playing: supercut by lorde 😞

taglist: @imagineyour-kpopboy @gothgyuu @carengene @spooksh0wbabe (if your name is bold it wouldn’t let me tag you!)

— kipo <3

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alovesreading · 2 years ago

Text

Chicken Shop Date | Part 4 |

By @imagine-that-100 and @alovesreading

Description of Part 1: Matty Healy x Reader (Female) | You and your best friend Amelia came up with a very simple idea of taking celebrities on awkward chicken shop dates, and somehow, it’s managed to become both of your jobs. In the past, you’ve found sitting across from some of the biggest stars on the planet and eating chicken nuggets easy. But then Amelia manages to score you a date with the man who you’ve been obsessed with since you were nineteen; Matty Healy.

Word Count: 18.7k

A/N: What better way to celebrate George’s birthday than a cute little Chicken Shop Date chapter! Me and @imagine-that-100 are so beyond excited to finally share this one with you lot, it’s such a wholesome one!!! We were giggling, blushing and kicking our feet writing it so we hope you love it! We absolutely love your reactions so please don’t be shy to share them with us, we’ve seen your love for this little story on here and on twitter and it makes us so giddy that you share our excitement over it. Hope you enjoy this one and thanks so much for reading! xx

| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 |

| N’s Masterlist | A’s Masterlist |

~*~*~*~ December 25th ~*~*~*~

Christmas time never fails to fill you up with joy as you get to reunite with your family and just laugh, catch up and shower everyone with gifts, but you are completely sure it doesn’t come close to the way your heart swells up every time you get a new notification saying that you’ve got a message from Matty.

It all started when you woke up to a text of his that said, Why is sleeping at your parents home always so much better? x which made you cackle loudly.

Finding a way to twist his words to tease him, you text him back a quick, Is that a dig at my bed? You can stay on my settee then next time bitch xoxoxoxox

No, you can’t banish me to the settee again xx Matty fights back in a matter of seconds and continues to add, I simply refuse xx but what has you raising your eyebrows in surprise is when he finishes by saying, And call me a bitch again and I’ll have you on your knees apologising for it xxx

Biting your bottom lip, you type, Is that a threat or a promise? and shortly after that’s sent, you add a cheeky, … bitch x knowing just what that would mean.

He acted like he wasn’t impressed, and you could just picture his face as he sent, Wow, really? At 10am? xx

Hilarious you think that’d stop me xx You bite back and to add more fuel to the fire, you send him a petty, Plus you started it xxx to remind him it’s all his fault.

You clearly have forgotten his effect on you because your mind starts to wonder places it shouldn’t at this hour and you’re only brought back to reality when your Mum knocks on your door to tell you to come downstairs for breakfast.

Your family and the reminder of the plans for the rest of the week engrossed you enough to completely miss Matty’s text that he sent a little after your texting was interrupted.

It was time stamped an hour ago and it said, Thinking back to this, I shouldn't be surprised... and the whole spitting thing? x

The last bit has you frowning because you’re sure you’ve not told him about any of your preferences in that aspect. So you send him back a text that’s basically you playing dumb on it, Spitting thing?

Eagerly waiting for a response, you almost jump in your seat when ten minutes later he says, Is our date really not memorable to you at all? Ouch, I demand an apology.

Giggling at his dramatic ways, you continue to play dumb on it by saying, It is memorable but what are you talking about?

You can almost picture him rolling his eyes at you and sighing and you’re left hanging for a response for a couple of minutes until he comes back with the link to a video and a time stamp.

Clicking on it, you’re brought to your date and when you skip to the minute he’s instructed you to, you realise what he means.

The exact moment plays when you say, “And Amelia didn’t like the spit on the camera.” to which he answered, “Only Amelia didn’t like it? So you enjoyed it?” and right after you hear yourself answer with a, “Maybe.” you go back to your conversation with your cheeks heating up.

He added a, If that's not a spitting kink confession, idk what is baby x right after he sent the video and you have a quick think on how to conceal that.

How’d you know that wasn’t just a bit for the video? You try to play with him since you actually wanted to keep him guessing.

But he surprises you when he says, I can watch it back and tell exactly when you’re telling the truth now baby, you’re like an open book x And whilst you’re trying to gather yourself again after melting over that, he sends another text that has you burning up head to toe. This just assures us we’ll have proper fun later baby, so it’s a win really xx

So does this mean you’re into that… You almost hate how shy the text sounds but you’re once again completely overcome by the way he makes you feel.

Are the shows not proof enough? Comes through from him and his smirk comes to the forefront of your mind, completely sure he’s smirking at his screen after having sent that.

Trying to play it cool, you reply with, I think they only spark more questions x

You have to hold back a screech when he sends, Lucky for you baby, I have loads of answers xx

And this time, as you decide to go for a breather after it all, you give him exactly what he’s giving you back. I’d ask for a list but I sorta wanna work them out on the job xx

It was a mistake from you to not expect him to have a comeback to that so you choke on your spit when he says, You gonna get your hands dirty and find out? xx

But you’re fully determined to leave him breathless so with your self control clouded by your filthiest thoughts, you reply, Hands, chest, face, mouth… The list goes on xx

Fucking hell… If you had been on a call then you would’ve died at the groan he let out reading that, Baby why do you have to be so far away? x

On the other hand you are giggling away as your tummy flutters from his reaction and you continue teasing him to keep him on his toes. Alright control yourself, it’s only 2pm x

It bites you back when he sends, You’re a little brat, aren’t you? which has your heart going faster at the thought of hearing him say that to your face.

Hmm call me that again xx Your inhibitions are out of the picture at this point but he is making you go insane with such little effort. It was unfair really.

And what? He texts back, daring you to finish your statement.

But you don’t give him the pleasure of knowing, You’ll find out about that soon enough xx Now be good and go on celebrating baby Jesus’ birthday x.

As opposed to adult Jesus’ birthday? He answers to take the piss out of your wording, Also need I remind you I’m a raging atheist?x

You cackle out loud at the reminder of that Genius interview and you just can’t not send him a screenshot of the exact moment along with, Oh no need to remind me when this exists (I can hear that image) x

Matty knows just how to get you, though, because you’re blushing slightly embarrassed when he says, Obsessed much? You must’ve had that saved cause that was too quick x

You’d love that wouldn’t you? X You quickly reply not letting him get the pleasure of your silence so you’re the one to end the conversation with a bit more teasing, Go play with your new toys Matthew, talk to you in a bit xx

Even though you truly had wanted to text Matty again soon after that conversation took place, you’d gotten carried away around your family and it wasn’t until later in the evening that you’re able to sit down with a cup of tea beside you to talk with him.

You would’ve loved to continue teasing him through text but you want to see his face now so you decide to FaceTime him.

With the biggest grin on your face, you start the video call with a loud, “Merry Christmas!” as soon as he picks up and you can’t even find it in yourself to care how overly chipper you sound as you greet him.

“Merry Christmas baby!” Matty matches your enthusiasm and he’s beaming at you, he finds you glowing under the warm lights that come from the Christmas decorations around your parents home. “Have you had a nice day?” He asks with a soft look on his face, it was a joke how much he found himself to be missing you after he stayed at yours before you went away.

“Yeah it's been really good, how's your day been?” You’d rather hear him talk about his day since yours had been fairly normal, like any other Christmas.

“Yeah busy. So much family, so many questions.” Matty almost rolls his eyes, annoyed at the situation but now he’s escaped to his room for a bit and he gets to see you, he’s happy. But he pouts as he says, “Barely got to text you, but it’ll be more chill over the next few days.”

Pressing your lips together, you try to hide the big grin that wants to break on your face and you shake your head in amusement, “It's okay, my family have been keeping me busy too. I was forced into the kitchen, reason being I'm always eating too much fast food on my dates so my Grandma was making me cook.”

A smile tugs at the corner of his lips and he tilts his head to the side to ask, “She thinks you only eat chicken nuggets?”

Aware of how ridiculous that sounds, you chuckle “I think so.” And you’re about to say something else when you’re distracted by how adorable he looks with his messy curls, tired eyes and that soft smile of his. “You look cute by the way.”

Matty’s eyes crinkle at the corners when his smile gets bigger at your compliment, “Thanks baby, you do too.”

Right then you could only hope it was dark enough for him not to notice your cheeks tinting red. “What did you get for Christmas?” You switch the topic when you see the shadow of a smirk forming on his face.

“Got this nice cardigan that Mum had made for me.” He lifts one of his arms up to show the sleeves of the clothing piece and you can’t help but be in awe at the pretty pattern of it and how soft it looks.

“Looks very cosy.” You compliment effortlessly, wishing you could cuddle him at that very moment.

But then he lifts himself up more to show what he’s wearing under it, “Not as cosy as my hoodie.”

“Oh my god,” You giggle, “As if you have it on still.”

“Of course I do.” Matty assures with a slight frown to pretend like the prospect of not having it on still was ridiculous, “Best present I got, baby.”

Shaking your head in disagreement, you state, “I'm going out tomorrow to buy you something better.”

“No, don’t” He warns you sternly, “I’ll be fuming if you do.”

But you don’t listen to him, rolling your eyes you go against his wishes, “You can be fuming all you want, I've got something in mind that I think you'll like so I'll be getting it you, no arguments. I’m just sorry I didn't get it before.”

He pouts hearing you apologise for it, “You really don't have to get me anything.” Doing his best puppy eyes for you to listen to him.

Yet that doesn’t work, it only makes you want to get it for him even more. “I want to, so absolutely nothing more on the subject until I hand it to you.”

“And when will that be?” His inquiry is purely in hopes to know how long until he sees you again and maybe it being before what you’ve arranged on the last day of the year.

“New Year's Eve?” You reply but it sounds like a question since you’re not sure exactly when you’ll be coming back home.

He deflates a little at the fact that he won’t be able to see you earlier so he says, “I get home the day before?” in the same tone as your previous answer, again hoping the information brings you to see each other before the already planned day.

But you bite your bottom lip as you remember the texts you had earlier in the day, “Are you being cheeky again?”

“Only if you’ll let me.” Matty’s signature smirk is directed at you once again and you’re screeching on the inside.

“I’m going to refrain, you know… I think we should let the tension build.” Is your polite way of admitting that you could absolutely not be in bed with him and not fuck his lights out if he wanted to stay with you again.

He scoffs out a laugh, “Let the tension build or you can't trust yourself to keep your hands off me.”

“Okay, absolutely no need to call me out like that.” You point out in warning and then remind him in a simple way that it wasn’t only you with the wandering hands, “And speak for yourself.”

He doesn’t let you pin it all down on him though as he bluntly recalls, “I think it was you that pushed me down on your bed, not the other way around.”

“Matthew,” You hear the very distinctive voice of Denise ring through the phone and you want to die when she shouts, “I don't want or need to know that.”

“Oh my god, no.” Your hand is instantly over your mouth and your cheeks flame at what she’s just heard Matty say.

You know he’s got AirPods in so she couldn’t hear you but the fact she’d just heard him say that you’d pushed her son down onto your bed makes you want to curl up into a ball and die. That was not how you wanted Denise’s first impression of you to go.

“Don’t eavesdrop on a conversation then, Mum.” Matty scorns, his eyes presumably on her to the right of him and not on his phone at all.

“Maybe just close your bedroom door so I can’t hear in future.” You can hear Denise backchat, but then she asks, “Who’s the lucky lady anyway?”

Immediately, you want to hide under your blanket. This can’t be the way you meet his Mum. It can’t be, you’ll never live it down.

“Not on Christmas,” Matty thankfully saves you. But it seems she’s persistent as Matty stands up and starts moving around his bedroom so she can’t see his phone. Him scolding her does make you giggle though, “No Mum, absolutely not.”

And you hear a little of her argument, but ultimately Matty just ends up saying, “Baby, I’ll phone you back shortly.”

“Okay,” You nod, and he’s gone in a panic before you even have the chance to get your goodbye out.

You wait for him to call back as you scroll through your phone and catch up with Amelia on what your families have been like so far. You’re giggling away as she tells you what her Aunt got everyone when Matty calls you back about 40 minutes later.

He smiles when he hears your giggles die down as you answer, “Sorry about that, she wouldn’t leave me alone and I promised I'd protect you.”

You shake your head, not agreeing on how he’s putting it. “I honestly love Denise, Matty, it wouldn’t bother me.”

He raises his eyebrows like he’s concerned over your naivety, “It would, you just don't know it yet.”

“You’re so nasty.” You scold him but you’re trying not to laugh at the situation.

But Matty can just picture so clearly what would happen if you met his mum right then and continues to warn you, “You won't be saying that when she doesn’t stop texting you. She tends to go a bit too overboard far too quickly.”

“Listen if you’ve not scared me off I doubt your Mum will.” You take the opportunity to tease him and it makes you chuckle when he rolls his eyes at your antics.

“Yeah, sure. You keep telling yourself that.” His fake annoyance makes your laughter continue and you see how he can’t fight the smile that breaks out on his face.

Remembering how your conversation was cut short before, Matty asks, “What did you get off Dimz for Christmas?” wanting to hear more about your day.

“I don't know yet.” You sip on your tea, looking at the gifts you have for her untouched under your tree.

“How come?” Confusion written all over his face since he thought you were spending the day together too.

“We have our Christmas’ together tomorrow instead.” You start explaining, “We always want each other's reactions so we save our presents for each other for tomorrow.”

He grins knowing what this meant, “Perfect excuse to call again tomorrow and find out what you got.”

You melt inside at the way his face lights up at the prospect of another promised call, “You don’t have to have an excuse to phone me. Like even if you’re bored, it's fine. Me and Ames do it all the time.”

And you truly mean it. You would very much encourage it because the way that you feel every time he texts you is becoming your favourite thing.

“I'm afraid you’ll get tired of my voice.” Matty jokes to get a laugh out of you.

But his heart swells when you assure him, “If it's not happened in the past decade, I doubt it could happen now.”

He feels himself becoming more and more affected by the things you say so he plays it off like that was a boost of his ego and playfully says, “Obsessed!” He lets out a whistle exaggerating it all and your cheeks grow hot at his dramatic actions.

“You wish.” Is the only thing you can think of saying, aware that he has the advantage here with his knowledge of you.

And he proves just that when he smirks and backchats, “You’ve got a tattoo for one of my songs and a top exclusively stating that if anyone isn’t me, you’re not interested… So I don’t reckon I need to be wishing for anything, baby. It’s just facts.”

You sigh and roll your eyes, knowing this all was brought up to him by none other than your best friend, “I still want to kill Amelia for telling you that.” and you elect to not blame yourself for wearing said top to his gig a few weeks after he was told about it.

Matty just smirks at you through the phone, leaning closer when he says, “I have a feeling she has more to tell actually.”

Pressing your lips together you take half a second not to react to him because she knows far too much about you that you’re not entirely ready for Matty to know yet. He’s a big boy, he can find things out for himself.

“You better not even try to get her to speak.” You point a finger at him.

“Why?” Matty raises his eyebrows playfully, but there’s a suggestive tone to his voice when he asks, “What are you gonna do about it?”

You smirk back, not letting him affect you this time, you just flirt back, “It’ll end up poorly is all I’m saying.”

“Yeah whatever,” Matty narrows his eyes at you playfully, “I’m willing to bet your bedroom has at least one poster of me up on your wall.”

“Remind me to never FaceTime you in my bedroom whilst I’m here.” You allude to him being right without actually giving him confirmation and you make sure that he will never ever see your bedroom walls.

Matty laughs at that and the both of you fall into easy conversation. Him talking about his day and you both share lots of anecdotes about your friends and family.

Neither of you have it in you to stop grinning at the other, your laughter mixing together as more stories are shared which ends up in him promising to text Amelia so she can get him your funny childhood pictures you’ve just told him about. And it seems that the sole mention of her name was enough to summon her somehow.

A text from your best friend pops up at the top of your phone as you’re talking and your eyes go a little wide when you see, IF YOU'RE IGNORING ME BECAUSE YOU'RE ON THE PHONE TO YOUR MAN I'LL BE KEEPING YOUR CHRISTMAS PRESENTS WOMAN!!! LEAVING ME ON READ FOR AN HOUR! THERE'S ONLY ONE PERSON THAT’D MAKE YOU DO THAT!!! DON’T BECOME ONE OF THOSE GIRLS THAT GETS A MAN AND STARTS IGNORING THEIR BEST FRIENDS!!!!

“Oh Christ, she’s getting arsey I’m not texting her back. One second.” You swipe off FaceTime so Matty just appears in a small corner of your screen and you quickly tap on your iMessages.

“Don’t let your friendships die because of me.” Matty chuckles a little, knowing you well enough by now that you and Ameila love each other just as much as him and the guys love each other. Nothing on the planet could break you apart.

As Matty says that, you’re replying, Wow, calm your tits Dimz! Co-dependent much?!?!

“I was doing shots with her at one this morning, she can chill out.” As you send the text off, you shake your head a little, faking annoyance and tell Matty, “She’s coming round here tomorrow too, so she needs to calm down.”

“I’ll tell her to stop interrupting us if you want?” He can already imagine Amelia’s reaction to him telling her to leave you two alone and the way he could play it so she would freak out. “No don’t because that will open up another can of worms that I can't close.” You reply with a sigh, knowing she’d make such a big thing out of one single comment from him that would leave you to clean up the mess for weeks afterwards.

That sparks curiosity in him again, having the very brief knowledge about her incessant interrogation after what had happened yesterday. “She stopped questioning you about yesterday?”

You sigh a little before explaining, “Not for the whole ride home and she outed me to her Mum which was more embarrassing.” and you will your cheeks not to burn in response to you actually telling him this.

“Did you tell her what happened?” Matty can’t help but smirk when he asks you that.

At the same time, Amelia's reply comes through and it has you wanting to throw your phone and scream, Don’t be getting cocky with me now because you’ll be getting to reenact one of those smut scenes you used to read about religiously in a few days time x

“Yes,” You answer his question with a small faintly embarrassed smile, “And she still thinks I’m not telling her everything.” It makes the both of you chuckle, but then you remember what her Mum said and you tell him, “Linda thinks I was serious about being in my slut era.”

Not rising to her games, you just respond, Goodnight Amelia x and close the app before opening Matty back up to be your full screen, and you smile seeing his big grin at what you just said.

“Only for me I hope.” He says and your smile is switched for pursed lips and narrowed eyes.

And as he says that, you see another message come through at the top of your phone that reads, Stay grounded Y/N xxx and you can practically hear her laughing from your house. The little bitch.

You hate that she holds so much power over you. All you need is for her to not tell Matty how fucking crazy you once were until after your date on New Years. You’re so close, you can’t let her fuck it now.

You roll your eyes before you’re directing all your attention back to the man who loves teasing you. “And you can keep hoping.” You state with a forced blank face, trying to appear serious.

But he scoffs loudly and rolls his eyes at you, “As if you aren’t.” And he steals your refutation from your mouth when he adds, “Do I need to bring my previous arguments back?”

Your silence is loud as you bite your tongue remembering all that he knows and what he could find out so you just give up and settle for a defeated “No.”

Winning this has a triumphant smile glowing on his face and you wish you could be stronger and not give him the satisfaction of it causing your own smile. Matty hums and then finishes by saying, “That’s what I thought.” And even when you roll your eyes at him, your smile doesn’t falter, neither does your erratic heartbeat.

Matty Healy really is going to be the death of you.

~*~*~*~ December 26th ~*~*~*~

Just like he had promised he would do, Matty calls you the following day a few hours after Amelia left to go back to her parents. You’d once again been texting Matty all morning, so he knew when was best to FaceTime you, and as soon as he was able to escape from his family again, it was the first thing he did.

“What did you get off Dimz?” He eventually asks after greeting each other. Having thought about it for quite a bit now and the curiosity is eating away at him.

And it only gets worse when you instantly reply with, “I don't want to talk about it.”

“What’s that meant to mean?” He’s taken aback by your point blank refusal to answer a simple question, and he can only think it means Amelia has caused some trouble so his curiosity grows stronger by the second.

Your defeated sigh makes him glow in anticipation of the answer, “Let’s just say the presents were themed and you will never ever see them.”

“Oh my god, tell me what you got right now.” Matty can’t take you being vague with him now because it only makes him more eager to find out.

Seeing your face, he knows you��re keeping your ground so before you even have said “Nope.” his camera pauses for a few seconds and you know he’s minimised your Facetime call to go somewhere else and by the way you can see the camera slightly shake, you ask, “Who are you texting?”

“Your best mate.” He states bluntly, almost done with his text.

The second you hear that fall from his lips, you let out a loud, “No!” as your blood runs cold and your heart drops.

Matty shrugs, sending the text without caring about your reaction, “Too late.”

And he finds you so adorable when you huff and cross your arms in annoyance. You can only say, “I hope you get lost in her dms.” since it’s exactly what you’re hoping to happen so that it saves you some great embarrassment.

“Please,” Matty waves you off, “I’m on her close friend's story.”

Once he tells you that, your heart drops once more. “No, please tell me you’re not.”

“Oh I am.” He smirks as he nods his head, very satisfied by the content he’s gotten to see from both of you. “I’ve seen you drunkenly dancing to my songs baby. Please continue with those moves for me more often.” You know exactly what he means and it makes you have to hide behind your hands as your cheeks start burning up.

But then he makes it even worse for you when he cheekily adds, “Preferably when I’m there and you’re pressed against me.”

You have no idea how you don’t scream out loud at that because you certainly just hear a deafening scream inside you. Taking a deep breath, you let your hands fall from your face and you try your hardest to appear unaffected by his words. “Maybe if you stop pushing my buttons you’ll get some of that on a lucky day.”

It isn’t necessarily an empty promise because in all honesty you would absolutely love that, but you know it’ll be a guessing game to know when the chance for that to happen will appear.

He salutes like he’s just received orders from a general and then proceeds to ask, “What did you get Amelia?” with the fakest innocence as he’s now trying to play good boy.

You shake your head at him first, but then tell him, “Aitch merch.” and both of you burst out laughing. Eventually you end up telling him that you got her a lot more than some shit Aitch merch but that was the funniest thing you got her.

An hour after the subject moved on and you completely forgot about the curly haired singer trying to see what presents you got from your best friend, Matty takes you by surprise when he excitedly gasps, “Now that is the sexiest blanket in the world.”

“Nooooo,” Your eyes go wide immediately, not even needing context about what he’s clearly just seen because you just know.

Amelia’s Christmas presents… All you can think is, Kill me now.

You’re so embarrassed as you complain, “You’re not meant to see it! How have you found it?!”

He lets out a cackle first before he finally answers, “She sent it to me but she's just put it on her story too and tagged us.”

“No!” You throw a small hissy fit as you open Instagram to check the damage. And when you see the picture she took of you proudly holding up your new blanket with a big goofy smile on your face, you yell, “The little bitch.”

You want to die because this new blanket Amelia got you, wasn’t just any regular blanket. This one has the picture of you and Matty standing beside each other, with you in your Robbers girl get up, after your chicken shop date, and it's huge. Yes you absolutely love it, but you did not want Matty to see it.

“That’s fucking amazing,” He continues to laugh and though you love hearing his chuckles, you’re too mortified to properly appreciate them. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

You frown at him like he’s lacking all forms of critical thinking, “Because you’re not a fucking psycho like she is.”

“I can see you absolutely love it from these pictures, do not lie to me.” Matty defends Amelia then, and it’s just the best set scenario because he can just continue to take the piss out of you. “That's probably the best present you’ve ever received.”

Whilst he is correct, apart from the fact he bought you presents himself so they will hold a very special place in your heart forever, you don’t give him the satisfaction of knowing that.

“Oh right ‘cause it’s you?” You roll your eyes at him playfully as your sarcasm is painfully obvious in your tone.

But Matty doesn’t let it faze him because he says, “Anything to do with me it’s always the best baby, you should know this already.” with the most smug expression on his face.

Looking at him with an eyebrow raised, you answer with, “I wonder how you can walk around with such a big head.”

You should’ve expected him to be funny as he says, “I wobble a little sometimes but yeah it’s alright, thanks for asking.”

Fully having to swallow your laugh and bite the inside of your cheek to keep your stern face, you simply sigh, “I hate you.”

And it becomes another sigh when he smirks at you and replies, “Well, baby, I doubt that.”

~*~*~*~ December 27th ~*~*~*~

“Hey baby.” Matty greets you with a big smile on that cheeky face of his.

You grin, “Hey Matty.” and you want to silently scream at how good he looks today.

He looks well rested and really bright and happy. His curls are unruly, just how you like them and already you want to silently scream where he can’t see you because he looks so fucking fine.

No one should be looking so good at almost 1pm the day after boxing day. The 27th is a day to do fuck all. All you’ve done today so far is make breakfast for your family and wrap the present you went out and got Matty yesterday.

“What are you up to today?” Matty asks you and you give him the boring answer of answering your emails for upcoming work events and more celebrities you have to research before the Golden Globes.

But before you have to do that, you want to speak to him, so after you finish explaining your process, you ask him, “What are you up to anyway? Have you had a change in scenery?”

You’re sure he has. It doesn’t look like his childhood bedroom that you’ve come to know when he gave you a little room tour.

“Yeah,” Matty nods, smiling at the fact you could tell, and he spins himself around so his background changes behind him as he’s explaining, “We’re somewhere in the Peak District in this house that Mum rented out for Lincoln's birthday today. Big family meal later, chefs coming in and everything.”

“That sounds like so much fun.” You can imagine how big and stunning the house might be.

He shrugs, knowing already what it’s like to have these family events and how he does enjoy them but he half wishes you were there with him. The one thing keeping him from saying it out loud is how he knows if you were there you’d be suffocated with questions.

“Hope so, but until about an hour before I’m gunna be bored as fuck and you told me to call when I’m bored so here I am bothering you again.” Matty ends up saying with a soft smile on his face, hoping to see on your face that you’re just as excited to always be talking to him like he is.

Frowning slightly you correct him, “I’m literally doing fuck all you’re not bothering me.”

That has his smile growing bigger and as he settles on his bed, getting comfortable to continue speaking to you, he asks, “What have you been up to?”

“Other than what I already told you, I’ve been really lazy and napped after I had breakfast.” A little embarrassed smile shows on your face, still a bit shy when being so open and honest to him about simple things like that.

You don’t think you’ll ever be over the fact that he said he would listen to a podcast if you were the one talking, you’d like to think that comment on your date was real, and with the way he acts you’re certain it was sincere. You’re still breathless over the fact that he’s always so attentive when listening to you talk about your pretty tame days compared to what his days look like as a musician.

And right then Matty reminds you just why, despite it all, he makes you forget everything to just focus on the way he makes you feel. “Wrapped in your new blanket?” He teases you with that smirk of his and your cheeks instantly heat up.

Trying not to smile at his satisfaction from getting you blushy again, you roll your eyes and reply, “I’m going to need you to stop referencing it please and thank you.”

Matty hums like he’s thinking about it, lips pressed and brows furrowed for a few seconds, only for it all to turn back into a smirk when he finally says, “Never.”

Your facetime ends up turning into just keeping each other company, with the conversation never really dying out. Yes there were quiet minutes throughout the call, when you were typing out an important email or Matty was reading something or other that he didn’t want to bother you with.

But you found yourselves aimlessly chatting, with time passing you by far too quickly for either of you to notice. You were googling various actors and directors who were going to be in attendance at the Golden Globes and making notes on them and because Matty was curious, he made you tell him everything that you’d found on them. He wanted your opinions on what you’d seen and if you thought they were any good or not.

Both of you laughed when Andrew Garfield was mentioned and you told him straight up that you weren’t doing any research on him because you practically knew it all. You’ve seen his new show Under The Banner Of Heaven so you didn’t really have to do much more fact finding on him as he was certainly one of your and Amelia’s favourite actors.

That in itself though, sparked Matty’s curiosity about if you put this much effort into researching your chicken shop dates, and then the inevitable question of ‘did you research me?’ to which you found your cheeks burning when you admitted to him that you didn’t have to do any for him or the band. As Matty’s smirk grew, you’re sure his ego did too and you tried your best to get back to your work as he continued teasing you for it.

Matty kept you entertained by going back to your research and adding some of his knowledge about the people you were googling about. Films that he’d liked from certain directors or intricate facts about their careers and how they got to where they are now, some actors small roles when they were younger or parts they had auditioned for and didn’t get.

Once again, speaking to the curly haired man is the easiest thing in the world. So much so, that you don’t realise just how long you’ve been talking to him until your phone pops up with the alert that you only have 20% battery remaining. And knowing it was near enough fully charged before the call started made you look at the time and you gasped when you saw it was 5:47pm.

Matty questions you on your shocked expression, wondering what had you gasping, but then it’s him who has the same reaction as you ask almost rhetorically, “How the fuck has five hours passed?”

“You’re kidding?” His jaw drops and he taps the screen to check the time on his own phone and he’s genuinely just as surprised to see you were right.

Talking to you felt like no time at all. If Matty had to guess he would have taken a shot in the dark that you two had been talking for a little over an hour and a half but no more than that.

But now he looks out of the bedroom window and sees it's dark and he realises that he’s got to be downstairs in the next 10 minutes before his Mum will undoubtedly come and shout at him for not being punctual.

“Fucking hell,” Matty gasps, immediately putting his propping the phone up against the wall of the desk he was sitting at before he starts scrambling about, “I was meant to get changed before dinner.”

Despite your best efforts, when you see him pull his top over his head revealing his chest you pretend like it doesn’t make your heart stutter for a second. Immediately flustered, especially when his next move is to walk around to the suitcase on his bed and unbuckle his jeans and drop them, leaving him in just his black Calvins.

You try and fail to keep your eyes solely on your laptop instead of your phone, but as Matty is pulling on his black dress trousers, he’s smirking back at you trying to act unbothered when you so clearly are.

The curly haired man teases, “You’re entertaining trying to not look at your phone right now.”

To try and save some embarrassment at being called out, you just admit, “I’m just trying to be a decent human being.”

“Leave your morals elsewhere because I very much enjoy your eyes on me baby.” Is what you hear next and if that’s not a green light you don't know what is.

However, that does not mean that you’re okay when you look back at your phone to see him picking out his white shirt and shrugging it on, his chest still on display, and his new tattoo standing out even more to you.

You can feel just how hot your cheeks have gone with this view you have though, and the fact you were caught out makes your embarrassment worse, but you sort of embrace it as you let yourself shamelessly watch him button up his shirt.

At the same time, you ask him with mortification clear in your voice, “Will there ever be a day where you don’t make my cheeks burn?”

It’s not like it’s even your fault at this point. He just looks so good and he’s confident in the most casual way about flaunting his attractiveness off to you. His slutty little waist that becomes defined when he tucks his shirt in, not to mention the way those trousers hug that peachy arse of his.

You need it to be New Years Eve stat. You don’t know how much longer you can take.

“Not if I can help it.” Matty smirks at you getting closer, making you blush again when he winks at you. And after he chuckles at you hiding behind your hand for a moment, he sees that he really has to head down, so he announces, “I've gotta run baby. I’ll message you though.”

“No, just go and enjoy your night.” You tell him, not wanting him to be on his phone when he should be spending time with his family. Smiling, you say, “I hope the food is good.”

“Thank you, I'm sure it will be.” Matty grins and then blows you a kiss before waving, “See ya later baby.”

“Bye Matty.” You grin, catching his kiss before blowing one back at him.

Both of you end the call with massive smiles on your faces and hearts beating a lot faster than they should be.

~*~*~*~ December 28th ~*~*~*~

It’s a few minutes past 1am and you feel like you’re back in school since you’re still doing your research on the endless list of people from the film industry that’ll be attending the event.

After you’d ended your call with Matty earlier you had wanted to go back into it but your thoughts had distracted you and you had needed to go on your phone to aimlessly scroll so your brain would shut up.

After that, Amelia had given you a call just so you could update each other on how you were going about it and sharing the information you had so far on everyone. Though that had ended up on Amelia finding out you still had a third of people to properly look through and she gave you a playful scolding for ‘letting your man distract you from work’.

You’re almost done now, only two people left and since you’re really tired you decide to put everything away and get ready to go to bed, deciding to finish the last two early in the morning tomorrow. After you come back from the bathroom with your fingers cold from the freezing water, you practically throw yourself on bed and get under the covers the quickest you could.

Forcing your eyes to close so you could get to sleep faster ends up being interrupted by your phone vibrating next to you where it's placed on the bedside table.

Frowning, you fully think it’s Amelia again but you find it so weird she’d call this late considering how she is about her early sleep schedule when she’s not out. But once you turn your phone around to see who it is, you’re met with a facetime from Matty coming through.

Answering rather quickly, “Baby?” is the first thing he says in a loud whisper as if he was trying not to make noise but failing.

“Hey Matty.” Your voice sounds hoarse from how long you’ve not spoken as you’ve been keeping quiet for everyone sleeping at your parents’ house.

That’s when Matty realises you’re snuggled up in bed already and so his eyes widen and a worried expression appears on his face. “Did I wake you up? Shit sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up.”

You chuckle at the way he’s slurring his words, and now seeing how pink his cheeks are, you can tell he’s drunk. “It's fine, don't worry I’m just being a Grandma and going to sleep early.”

“Hottest fucking Grandma in the world if you’re calling yourself that.” He states with such conviction, it has you wanting to screech into your pillows.

You’re so glad it's dark in your room so he can’t see the way you get all embarrassed. You hide into your pillow a little more but you distract him anyway by asking, “How was your night?”

“Was fucking mental baby,” Matty tells you as he puts his phone down so he can still see you, and he starts unbuttoning his shirt as he explains, “These chefs started singing and it was like a full on opera… I’m so confused as to who actually cooked the meal for us because I really dont think it was them two now.”

Your eyes wander a little as he finishes undoing his shirt, “That sounds like so much fun.”

His smile turns into a pout as he takes his shirt off and tosses it somewhere behind him. “It would have been so much more fun if you were here too.” Right after he says that, he’s grabbing his phone and plopping himself down on the bed.

You grin as he rests his elbow on the bed and his chin on his hand, “You're cute, but I bet you had a great time with your family.”

“You would have loved it. Food was amazing,” Matty’s mouth water a little reminiscing about how good it all was but when his eyes are drawn back to your face–which he can barely see–, his chest tightens thinking about just how much he wants to see you again.

So in his drunk state, he confesses, “I miss you baby… so much.”

And you can’t hide from him the fact that you feel the exact same way, so you reply with an honest, “I miss you too.”

“Is that weird to say?” He asks out but before you can even assure him that it isn’t, he continues his ramble, “I hope it's not, I just really like you and I've not felt so myself around someone in a long time. You make it easy baby, I really miss you.”

You are melting hearing him so easily say that and it has you pinching yourself to make sure you aren’t dreaming.

The feeling is reciprocated and you make sure to tell him just that, “It's not weird to say at all. I feel the same, not felt as comfortable as I do around you with anyone new for a long time.”

Matty has the biggest smile on his face after you say that, his insides coating with this warmth he’s not felt in a while and as his eyes close from how big his grin is, he continues with his sincere words, “I really like you.”

Biting your lip, you feel your stomach doing somersaults, “I really like you too.”

“I just wish you were here. I wish I was cuddling you again. You keep me warm. Helps me sleep.” He admits it all, and it’s especially that last bit that has your heart growing in size because you’ve not heard that he has trouble finding sleep lately.

You’re sure if you try to give him a cohesive answer, you’ll fail so you go straight for a little joke so you can calm yourself down at least for a few seconds. “Maybe you should have got yourself a heated blanket.”

But Matty makes it so hard to collect yourself when he rolls over on his back and you see him shaking his head, “No, I’d rather have you.”

The way his curls fall messily over the pillow, and how pretty he looks as his face softens from his exhaustion, has you wishing so hard that you were there beside him and that time would go faster just so it could be New Years and you could have him all to yourself again.

“Me and my heated blanket?” You joke once again with a little smirk on your face that he can’t really see from how dark it is and the way his eyes keep closing against his will.

“Might consider if it was your better blanket.” Matty smirks and forces his eyes open to see your reaction, which ends up being a little giggle, “You know, the one with me all over.”

“Of course you do.” You reply with your smile still unwavering on your face.

In his drunken mind he gets the tiniest bit defensive then, “I’m better than that blanket though.”

And you give him the pleasure of agreeing with him, “Yeah, I prefer the real deal.” It’s not even a burden to admit that because you would take cuddling him over anything, any day.

Matty can’t stop his giggles and his grin grows bigger at your answer. “I'm so excited for New Years. I can't wait to take you out.”

It really is all he can think about, counting down the days wasn’t enough anymore and with the way he always keeps his eyes on the hours ticking by, knowing it was an hour closer he’d be in your company again. He’s at the point now where he’s eagerly awaiting a text back from you all the time, hoping it's you calling him and not someone else.

And hearing you say, “I'm excited too.” makes him happier than he’ll ever admit.

You’re just smiling so brightly at him and he can see it dimly lit by your phone, “I think you’re gorgeous you know?” Copying your position, he lays on his side and snuggles his pillow, “I really do. You’re hot as fuck but you’re also really gorgeous.”

You have to move your phone for a second, aiming the camera to the ceiling just so you can silently scream into your pillow and thanks to his hazy mind, he misses the few seconds it takes you to let it out.

“Thank you Matty.” You finally say after you’ve brought your phone back where he can see your face.

“See? Look at you!” The brightness of your phone lit up your face and Matty found it so fucking adorable seeing you with your cheek pressed against the pillow and your messy hair, tucked in with the covers up to your chin and that grin of yours he was growing obsessed with.

“I wish I could kiss you right now.” He confesses with a sigh, making your heart beat erratically in your chest.

“Matty…” Is all that you can mutter in almost a whine as if you’re pleading for mercy on your heart.

But he doesn’t stop and when he continues saying, “What? I really enjoy kissing that pretty face of yours.” You just hide your face into your pillow, needing to at least have a break of how he’s looking at you because you can only take so much.

“No, don’t hide.” He quietly complains, making you turn back to see him on your screen and you’re about to laugh at his frown but the second he catches a glimpse of your face again, he says, “There we go.” and you’re back being an utter mess.

Your free hand covers your face that’s burning up at every little thing he keeps saying and it’s your turn now to complain about it all, “It’s so unfair!”

It almost sounds like you’re throwing a fit and he finds that hilarious so he cackles before asking, “What’s unfair?”

There’s no reason for hiding anymore, not when you’ve both been admitting many things throughout the whole call. And you know he’s saying all this because of the alcohol making it easier for him to say this all out loud to her but you hope so much that you can hear him say all of it again when he’s sober.

So pouring a bit of your heart out you answer his question, “How easily you make me go like this.”

At this point you should really know that everything to come out his mouth will have you in shambles, because that’s exactly how you feel when he replies, “Well then it’s unfair for me too because I’m a proper mess for you baby.” And he gives you more to add to the list of things that will replay in your mind forever when he continues his confessions, “Think about you all the time.”

“I can’t.” You mumble instantly, everything sending you into a brief state of disbelief along with burning cheeks and a massive smile that won’t leave your face. You hide behind your hand once again and Matty giggles with a loopy smile, loving seeing you react to him like this, but his eyes keep closing from how tired he is.

It’s endearing watching him try and continue the conversation, and you answer him as you watch him try his best not to fall asleep on you. There's another few minutes of conversation before you get his attention again and his eyes reluctantly peel open.

“Yeah?” Matty asks, but when you see his eyes focus on his phone, your heart beats a little faster seeing the way he smiles in response to seeing you.

“You need to close your curtains and turn your big light off so you can go to sleep.” You tell him because at this rate he’s just going to fall asleep as he is.

Matty hums in response, knowing you’re right, but he also can’t help but tease, “You just want me to take my pants off.” because he realises he’s still half dressed.

And when you just stutter for a response, not expecting him to say that, Matty giggles a little and the noise makes you smile. “I love teasing you.” Matty says as he gets himself up, bringing you with him to draw the curtains.

“I know you do.” You smile, and the singer can tell you’re embarrassed by him admitting that. But he loves it when you say, “I’ll have to get you back soon.”

“You can tease me anytime you like, baby.” Matty grins as you watch as his screen descends into darkness accompanied by the noise of the light switch.

As your cheeks grow warmer, you also hear the sound of his trousers presumably being unzipped and the shuffle of him getting them off. But the camera eventually settles with just the faint glow of his phone on his pretty face which is snuggling into his pillow again.

“Come get in bed with me baby.” He tiredly mumbles, “I need a cuddle.”

“I’m there in spirit.” You tell him and you find it comical that the man that claims he doesn’t sleep well with no one beside him is once again almost asleep as soon as his head hits his pillow.

His eyes are closed again, and the more he talks the slower his words come which makes you smile. He’s clearly a tired boy and you’re tired yourself so you decide to call it a night.

You softly say, “Get some sleep Matty, yeah?”

“Okay baby.” Matty nods very slightly, his eyes still closed though. But he smiles as he says, “You too.”

“I will.” You assure him, your heart bursting during this whole interaction.

But it hits you a little more when after a beat of silence he repeats himself, “I miss you.”

“I miss you too.” Your chest is truly aching with all the feelings you have stored for him.

Despite him almost being asleep, he finds it in himself to tell you, “Imma call you again tomorrow so we can plan our date, okay?”

“Okay.” You nod, despite him not being able to see you.

The sincerity in his voice has you smiling too as he says, “I'm so excited for New Years.”

“Me too.” You grin.

“Night night baby, speak to you tomorrow.” Matty mumbles, his face fully pressed into his pillow now.

You take a few seconds to memorise the sight, before you softly say, “Goodnight Matty.” and end the call.

~*~*~*~

This morning you decided you would let Matty rest, as after a night drinking you usually want to stay in bed for the majority of the morning so you’ve left him to it. You wanted to text him wishing him good morning and that you hoped his head was okay after all the wine, but you didn’t want his phone to go off and disturb his sleep, so you left it.

Instead you busied yourself, you went out and did the food shopping for the family even though you were leaving in the next few days. Regardless, you went out and did it, and as you were half way through unpacking it all and putting it away into various cupboards, your phone starts vibrating and when you take it out of your pocket you see it’s Matty FaceTiming you.

“Morningggg!” You answer excitedly as the call connects and you prop your phone on the windowsill so he can see you.

Instantly you’re met with a loud groan, and when you look at your phone, you giggle seeing that Matty’s face is all scrunched up with his head still in his pillow.

“I’m far too hungover for you to be this chipper so early on.” Matty says as he turns his brightness down on his phone a little, his eyes being far too sensitive to your light setting. “I called because I thought you’d be half asleep like me.”

“I’m sorry baby, I’ve been out this morning.” You lean forward over the worktop so you can see him properly, and you grin seeing how cute and tired he is, “I'm ready for the day.”

You don’t realise you’ve even done it, but Matty grins at you when he asks, “Did you just call me baby?”

Knowing he was right and that you must have done it, you try to maintain some confidence instead of immediately shying away like you’re used to. You ask him with raised eyebrows, “Is that not allowed?”

“It’s allowed,” Matty nods, entirely amused yet he also really loves that you said it, “But I just didn’t expect it.”

You hum, letting yourself smile at him, but you change the subject, “How are you feeling?”

“Rough.” The curly haired brunette admits, “Had one too many glasses of wine.”

Even though you could tell that last night, you coo, “Aw no.” as you don’t want him feeling unwell.

Matty lets out a long sigh before he snuggles back into his pillow, he tells you, “I need a cuddle baby.”

“Wrap a blanket around yourself and consider me giving you one.”

“Not good enough, I need you in my arms.” He says as he pulls his duvet up around his shoulders and pouts at you.

You can’t stop smiling at him as you tell him, “If I could teleport, I’d be there in a heartbeat.”

It warms his heart immensely, but so does yours when he coos, “Need you.”

“Aw Matty,” You chest aches for him, you wish you could spend a full day cuddled beside him, it's a crime you can’t yet. “Don’t make me feel bad I can’t be there.”

The curly haired man chuckles a little, but he asks you, “Can you just take me about your day with you? Podcast me.”

And you’re really not going to argue with him. You chat a little as you put your shopping away, and you do it leisurely because you always find yourself looking back at him.

You both joke a little bit about the shit that you are doing and more boring plans for both of your days, but you’re not really surprised that after forty minutes or so Matty’s eyes have fallen shut. You only notice after you finish telling him a random story from your childhood, and you see that he’s doing the exact same thing as last night.

Even today, it's still just as endearing seeing him snuggled into his pillow, and it warms your heart that he feels comfortable enough to fall asleep around you. Once again, you take a mental picture of him like that, longing to be seeing him like this in person preferably with you in his arms again.

You watch him for another minute before you catch yourself and how odd it really is of you to do. All you can do is blame it on the mental turn of events that now somehow you get to see the man you’ve fancied since you were 19 on your phone falling asleep listening to your stories that he asked to hear.

Life is fucking crazy, but you’ve never been more grateful for everything thats happened for you to get here.

You whisper, “Sleep well Matty.” before you reluctantly end the call.

~*~*~*~

“Hi.” Matty shyly greets you when you pick up, you recognise he’s wearing his Chicken Shop Date hoodie, his curls look freshly washed and the visual makes you smile even harder.

“Heyyy!” You reply just as enthusiastically as you had earlier and it’s all because you’re really growing fond of these calls of yours and you think it’ll be a habit you’d really like to actually adopt and it not only being because you’re away for the holidays on the eve of your date.

He grins at your tone but it falters a bit when he says, “I’m so sorry I fell asleep on you.”

“Don’t apologise, it's fine. You were really tired, it's fine.” You assure it hadn’t been anything to apologise for, you actually are still thinking about how pretty he looked in his slumber, all calm and soft features. It had you asking time to run so you could see it next to you once more.

But he’s stubborn as he thinks it was rude of him to fall asleep when you were talking so he tries again, “It’s not fine, I apologise.”

You’re not having it so with a stern look on your face you simply say, “Matty.” to make him stop.

It’s a short-lived expression of yours because when he automatically replies, “Baby.” your cheeks start to burn and you have to look away.

Matty chuckles when he catches the way you roll your eyes and your hands come to press against your hot cheeks, “Really it just takes me calling you baby to get you all embarrassed?”

Shaking your head without looking at him, you only say, “No comment.” knowing that he already has an idea of that being a statement and there’s no need to ask about it.

A few seconds pass and your hands are still on your cheeks, only this time your hair has fallen over your face and he can’t properly see you, and he wants to see your face when he tells you about the news for your date on New Year's Day.

His voice is soft when he says, “Don’t hide baby.”

And you get flashbacks to the night before so, “Matty, not again.” leaves your lips subconsciously, once again with that subtle begging tone since you know that whenever he starts saying things like that your chest tightens in a way that you’re not sure is healthy.

“What do you mean again?” Matty frowns utterly confused, he doesn’t remember saying that earlier.

You pause for a second to see if he’s joking but seeing his face stay blank has you laughing. “Oh, you don’t remember all that you said last night?” You tease him about it, your brain already liking what this means.

“No.” He replies with a frown, wary of what he could’ve said for you to react like this.

“I mean, it wasn’t that bad.” You start saying, fighting hard against letting it show that you’re about to mess with him, taking the best out of this opportunity really. “Do you remember calling me a gilf?”

It hadn’t necessarily happened like that but referring to his hot grandma comment that way made his face contort in the funniest confused expression that made you almost burst out laughing.

“What the fuck no? Why would I call you a gilf?” Matty tries hard to think about any reason for him to call you that but he can’t come to any conclusions.

He wants to know the context but his curiosity is left unattended when you only shrug and say, “I don't know but you did.”

“Fucking hell.” He swears under his breath, scorning himself for being such a loose mouth when drunk.

Smirking, you continue the teasing recap, “Do you remember begging for a cuddle?”

“No but I'm not surprised, this room is freezing.” That one lets him find a bit of relief since it wasn’t weird and he hopes the rest of what he said stays the same.

But he’s laughed at by his past drunk self when you continue with, “What about how much you missed me?”

“Wow, I really play it cool when I’m drunk, don't I?” He chuckles a little but he focuses on the way you seem so satisfied remembering everything, like you actually liked hearing all of it and that is enough for him to feel settled about it all.

Until you decide to play with him a little.

“Wasn’t the half of it baby.” Your smirk grows, as the cogs in your brain turn and you finally think of something that could get the best reaction out of him, “You also said something about going through my Instagram… You know, for my pictures.”

His heart drops hearing you say that and you see him freeze like he’s been caught red handed, “I told you about that?!”

And it’s when his head goes into his hand that you’ve stumbled across something you never got a second imagined would be true.

You gasp loudly, “Oh my god! What?!” is all you can almost yell in disbelief and when you see him looking incredibly concerned about it all, you burst out laughing. “Matthew! You’re nasty!” You playfully scorn between loud cackles, you cannot believe he actually just admitted to that.

“Wait, what?!” He quickly says, not truly understanding why you’re reacting like this if he had said that the night before, “Didn’t you just say I said that?”

His eyes are wide and his jaw is hanging as he’s fully shocked, it all has you doubling over in laughter, truly incapable of catching your breath. “I was joking about that.” You clear up as you finally are able to calm down and then another cackle leaves you, knowing now you have something valuable to get him back whenever he tries to tease you.

You sigh, a smirk tugging at the corners of your lips, “Oh my fucking god.”

Matty’s hands are over his face again now, entirely embarrassed and he pleads, “Stopppp.” as his fingers drag down his cheeks.

But you’re absolutely loving this. “Oh this is so good to know.” You say excitedly.

“Why are you like this?” Matty sighs, his cheeks slowly getting more red and you’re absolutely loving every second.

“Can’t believe you just outed yourself like that,” You laugh, knowing that this fact that you’ve stumbled across is doing wonders for your ego, “You’re so easy, aren’t you?”

Matty pouts, “You’re being mean now.” as he tucks his curls behind his ear, something that you know by now he does when he’s a little nervous.

“If you think this is mean, you’ve seen nothing yet, big boy.” You tease, still smirking.

Matty grins and raises his eyebrows suggestively hearing you call him that, “You can call me that again.”

“Absolutely not.” You chuckle, but you keep the power you currently have over him when you state, “I’m curious now, though.”

“No you are not.” Matty shakes his head, knowing exactly what your next sentence is going to be.

“Yes,” You smirk, “And you’re gonna tell me what your favourite picture of mine is.”

“I’m not.” Matty shakes his head, trying not to show you his embarrassed smile and he can feel his face flame even more.

“Yes you are.” You demand, but he shakes his head again, so you plead, “Baby, please?”

How can he deny you when you call him baby and you’re just staring at him all doe eyed and eager. He embarrassingly admits, “The one at the Miu Miu party. Not you and Amelia, just the one of you.”

“Oh yes,” You smile, remembering what you were wearing and the picture you posted on Instagram fondly. You big yourself up, “I looked fucking hot in that mini skirt suit.”

“You certainly did, baby.” Matty smirks, agreeing with you after he unhides behind his hand and releases a long sigh.

“Right, wipe that smirk off your face because I want you embarrassed again.” You grin, not letting this go whilst his cheeks are still pink.

Matty puts on a brave face and acts unbothered now though, “Well I’m not anymore.”

“Sure you aren’t,” You tease him, “You’re sure you’re not embarrassed after you’ve just admitted to fucking your fist to my pictures?”

Phrasing it like that has Matty’s eyes jumping wide open. His dick twitches in response to your words and the various memories of him actually doing that whilst he was away on tour and the majority of this past week.

Matty says your name hoping it’ll make you stop, “Y/N.”

“Oh Y/N now is it?” You grin, finding him even more amusing now.

All he can do is sigh, and he looks straight at you as he admits, “You’re driving me insane.”

“I sure hope so.” You smile, enjoying every sweet second of his reaction, “Quite like this turn of events.”

Matty pleads, “Stop.”

“What?” You grin, acting all innocent, “I’m not saying anything.”

Matty runs his hand through his curls and sighs into the distance, as he can’t look directly at you for a few moments which amuses you further. And when he does look back at you, you love seeing him not be as cool and confident as you know he usually is with you.

“You’re never gonna let me live this down are you?” He asks you, and you hope that you’ll be able to draw this reaction out of him again sometime.

“Never.” You confirm, grinning like a fool, absolutely loving how sheepish he currently looks.

You understand why he likes doing this to you now.

“Can’t wait for you to see my Golden Globes dress.” You bite your lip loving the way his eyes seem to light up at the mere mention of it, but then roll back when you add, “Might ask for the thigh slit to be even higher.”

Matty lets out a groan of pleasure at the mere thought and the noise makes you press your thighs together. Thankfully the man can’t tell as his eyes are closed as he’s groaning, “You’re going to murder me.”

You chuckle a little at that and nod once he looks back at you. This might be the best news of your life.

Matty Healy has cum to the thought of you. Life goal achieved. Next goal is to make him cum in person, and hopefully he will return the favour so you can die a very very happy woman.

“What about the one where I'm in my GQ awards dress at the hotel?” You have to ask, because that is one of the others that you think he’d use. “Did you like that one?”

“Yeah, I liked those ones too.” Matty reluctantly admits, loving but hating the fact this has you all excited.

“Mhm, bet you did.” You tease him again, “Dirty boy.”

“Don’t start with that.” He sighs like it pains him to hear those words come from your mouth, but it’s a pain caused by not having you right there with him because a second later he’s smirking at you through the screen, “Are you trying to get me going?”

You match his smirk, your tummy fluttering at the way he’s looking at you, “Should I be?”

Matty continues teasing you so the previous conversation is dropped, smirking even more at the way you seem to be recoiling into yourself under his gaze, “Dunno, depends on which mood you’re in, baby.”

But you know what he’s trying to do, so you bring it all up over again, “I don’t think I really need to do much now, though. Can just show you my Instagram account from now on.”

He lets out a long sigh, his face completely falling after your words, “Oh you love knowing this, don’t you?”

To taunt him more, you nod eagerly with the biggest grin on your face, feeling triumphant really, “Absolutely. I have you right here.” You point at the palm of your hand, eyes narrowed playfully at him and nose slightly scrunched as if you’re taking the piss out of him.

All it takes for you to fold is him saying, “You sure do baby.” in such a sweet voice with the softest of smiles.

“Stop it.” You warn, pressing your lips together as you’re really holding back from reacting but you feel everything he says lighting up every nerve on your body.

Matty chuckles, his eyes still staring at you like it’s impossible for him to look somewhere else, “What?”

You roll your eyes at his attempt to appear innocent and you shake your head to say, “Just let me have my moment.”

“Right, sorry.” His hands are up as if he’s giving up yet a shit eating grin breaks on his face and his stare is so intense you have to look away.

You warn him before you even look back at your phone, “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” He tries to sound the most confused, “M’not doing anything.”

You point an accusing finger at him when you turn back, “You are! And you know exactly what it is.” He seems to grow even more amused at your reaction, making you sigh, “How have we gone from bullying you for getting off to my pictures to me not being able to look at you, fucking hell.”

He shrugs his shoulders, “I have that effect.”

“I don’t need you having a bigger ego, so stop it.” You try to make your statement serious but he can see straight through you and the way he’s got you right where he wanted.

“Do you really want me to stop though?” Matty plays with you, an eyebrow raised and you squirm in your seat in silence. He lets you sulk in the lack of words but when it gets longer than he expected, he just can’t hold back from teasing you even more, “Cat got your tongue?”

Keeping your stoic face the best that you can, you shake your head, “Just thinking of a way to shut you up.”

But your whole face falls when he replies, “If you were here baby, there’s loads of ways I would love for you to shut me up.”

His eyes scream mischief, and you cannot wait to find out what it is that he’s been thinking about and planning for weeks for your date that is so soon, you just can’t quite believe it, “Only two days now.” You bite your lip to conceal the massive smile that’s threatening to tug at the corner of your lips.

Yet you fail because seeing you smiling this big at him, has Matty matching it and his insides melt thinking about having you next to him once again, “Couldn’t go slower if you ask me.”

And you’re about to say how you feel the same way, like time is playing tricks on you when something seems to go off in his head and he continues, “Oh, that reminds me,” Matty smiles, “I have questions about New Year’s Eve?”

You raise your eyebrows curiously, and you lean forward giving him all your attention, “Go on.”

“So George and Charli are hosting their first party in their new house in the evening and I wondered if you wanted to go to that? And if you did, I still want to take you out so thought I could take you out to dinner earlier on and then we go to their party whenever.” Matty tells you but he also doesn’t want you to feel like you had to spend the night with other people when your original plan was to spend it with just him, “It’s honestly fine if you don't wanna go to theirs, I can take you out later on then, but if you did I will take you out earlier.”

You can see that the singer is rambling on for nothing though, because you nod, “I’m up for going to their party if they won't mind me coming.”

“They don't mind at all, George asked me to ask you.” Matty tells you, “He said Amelia can come too if she wants.”

And Matty is telling you the truth, when George asked him if he was coming, Matty point blank said no and that he was going on a date with you and then George told him to bring you with him afterwards. He said to invite Amelia too if she wasn’t already busy and Matty promised he would ask.

He’d been nervous about it though because he didn't want you to think that he was trying to get out of your date to go to his mates house. It was the complete opposite, he would rather spend the night with you, yet at the same time if you felt comfortable enough, he’d love for you to become friends with his friends too.

“I’ll ask her, thank you.” You smile, and clarify, “So we’re going out earlier?”

“Yeah,” Matty nods, and he suggests, “Maybe I could pick you up about four and we go out near you in Brixton somewhere? And you can stay at mine later when we get back from George’s?”

“Yeah, that sounds good.” You nod, trying not to smile like a fucking idiot.

You can feel your heart pounding in your chest at the mere thought. Never have you ever been more excited for a date, and you’ve been on a lot of them at this point.

“You ever been to The Laundry?” Matty asks, bringing you out of your thoughts.

Thinking about it for a moment, you remember the restaurant he’s talking about and nod, “I went in for drinks once last year I think. It’s nice.”

Matty smiles and raises his eyebrows curiously, “Would you let me take you there?”

As if he even needs to ask.

“I’d go to McDonalds with you, Matty.” You try and put it as plainly as possible how little you care about where it is you go. As long as you’re with him, you will have a great time, “I took you on a date in a Chicken Inn, anything is better.”

“Okay,” Matty chuckles, realising as well that it really doesn’t matter. He had fun on your last date and he knows that’s everything to do with you and not just the bit that the both of you were playing up to. So he smiles and nods, “I’ll book a table for like half four and then we can go to George’s afterwards. If that sounds okay with you?”

“Sounds perfect.” You bashfully grin, really letting yourself get excited about it now.

Matty grins right back, but it's more in reaction to your face in the corner of his screen as he’s putting in his details for the reservation that makes him pause. You look so fucking cute, he can’t help but tease you a tiny bit as he taps back onto the FaceTime so you take up his full screen again.

Matty asks, “What’s that smile for?”

At the risk of being cringe, you don’t hide your emotions from him this time. “I’m excited… I’m happy.” You shrug a little, feeling your cheeks heat up at the admission, but you ask, “Am I not allowed to smile?”

“Course you are.” Matty grins right back, and he takes a screenshot of how cute you look in this moment, before he ruins it by teasing you even more. “I just like knowing I'm the cause of it, baby.”

At this point, you drop your phone so he can’t see you anymore. You really just need to take a second to silently scream and not look all flustered in front of him.

You can hear him laugh and you silently scream into your hands for a moment before taking a deep breath and designing some composure. Matty laughs when you pick your phone up and you have your lips pressed together and you look all flustered.

Even more so when you whisper, “You’re going to be my cause of death.”

He teases you for a minute more until he goes back to finishing the reservation. You chat as he does it, and the both of you confirm the time of half 4 and then Matty books it.

Truly, you’ve never been so excited for a date. And Matty feels the exact same. Maybe it's because he’s never actually had to wait for a date this long, but also because he is genuinely so excited to be back in your company soon.

You spend the next half an hour talking about everything and nothing. But you do end up asking him about his plans, “What are you doing tomorrow?”

“We have to leave this house tomorrow, so I think because I’m not too far away from Sheffield imma go call and see Wheels and Alex,” Matty tells you, although he should probably text his best friend and ask if he can just gatecrash her day. The curly haired man explains, “I think they are up visiting her best friend and Alex’s family.”

“That sounds fun.” You smile, “You’ll have a great day.”

“I always do when I see her to be fair, she’s one of my best friends.” Matty smiles, “She’s a gem.”

You can’t help but think that’s pretty adorable of him. You’re aware she’s his ex-girlfriend, but she’s happily married to another legend and the way Matty still regards her so highly after so many years of not being together must mean she’s lovely.

And you’ve followed her for years, just like you had Matty, and you’ve always thought she was great. So there’s nothing stopping you from nodding and agreeing, “She seems it on her socials.”

Matty smiles hearing that, but he also gets a little excited when he realises and tells you, “You’ll meet her.”

“I will?” You raise your eyebrows questioningly.

“Yeah, I’m certain that she’s going to George and Charli’s.” Matty thinks out loud. “I’ll double check tomorrow.”

You hum in response to that, smiling and the thought just makes you even more excited for New Years. But you then get lost in your thoughts for a moment, wanting to know something but you don’t know whether you should ask or not.

After internally debating it for a few seconds, you just ask Matty, “Can I ask you a personal question?”

Matty nods, “Course you can.”

He has nothing to hide from you, and you’ve been hiding nothing from him so he doesn’t mind telling you things about himself.

“You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.” You give him the option, not wanting to pry too much.

Matty brushes it off and encourages you, “Hit me baby.”

“Okay Britney Spears.” You chuckle a little before you go serious and ask him your question, “Do you get on with Alex now?”

“Because from an outsider's point of view - who obviously has no real insight into what was happening - it always seemed like a personal dislike you had between you. Like it wasn’t just for the sake of not liking each other, it was actually fuelled.” You look around your room as you find your words to ramble on but when you glance back at Matty and can’t quite gauge his reaction, immediately you backtrack, “I’m not explaining this well. Sorry… You don’t have to answer.”

“No, it’s okay.” Matty assures you and he goes on to say, “The simple short answer is yes. We get on, and everything is fine now.”

Matty continues with a small smile on his face when he explains, “Even I find it funny sometimes that after a decade of not liking him, he’s actually a really good mate now. Makes me laugh, can chat about things that aren’t just music and we can both embarrass Wheels so it’s quite funny too.”

You absolutely love that nickname he has for her. You sort of only know 1975 lore of where that nickname actually came from, but you’re sure you’ll ask him or her at some point if you do end up meeting her at George’s party.

“I’m sure one day I’ll tell you the full story, it’s too heavy for a FaceTime… I’d wanna tell you in person,” Matty pulls on the end of his curls before he tucks the ringlet beside his ear as he says that, which again you notice is his nervous behaviour, “But yeah, we’re friends and he’s actually a good laugh.”

Recognizing he was a little nervous saying that, you shake your head, “You don’t have to tell me anything… I wasn’t prying for details, I just wondered if you got on.”

Matty can see you starting to panic a little, so he eases your worries, “No, I know you weren’t, but I will tell you at some point… It’s everything that’s made me into who I am today so I don’t want to hide it from you.”

Hearing how sincerely he said that makes your chest ache. And you get the vibe the story will be a rollercoaster of emotions so the mere fact he actually felt comfortable enough with you to even discuss possibly telling you, means the world to you.

When you softly tell him, “As long as you’re comfortable with that.” Matty can’t get the smile off his face.

You're far too cute for your own good. All he wants to do is hug you and cuddle you into him and never let go.

He assures you, “You make me comfortable, baby.” and your heart proceeds to melt.

Christ knows how you’re going to make it through this date.

“Good, I’m glad…” You trail off, that smile now back on your lips as you're entirely obsessed with him. But that’s not to stop you from teasing again, “Will you sort out my dates with them tomorrow please?”

Of course Matty fakes an offended gasp then though and you have to bite your lip to stop yourself from laughing. The singer asks with wide eyes, “Can we have our second one first please?”

You laugh and nod, but instruct him, “Just plant the seed and I’ll do the rest.”

~*~*~*~ 29th December ~*~*~*~

Both you and Matty stayed up chatting again last night, both until you were almost falling asleep on each other again. And today with him being busy you’ve not FaceTimed because he had been busy with family in the morning, and he’d gone to Sheffield in the afternoon, and you were spending the evening and night over at Amelia’s.

Regardless though, you’ve been in contact most of the day, and it's been incredibly flirty. And that all started this morning after you’d already been messaging for a while and you moved on to the topic of the films you had to watch for the Golden Globes, but then the conversation changed to what your favourite films of all time were.

You seem to have pretty similar taste in films, despite the few niche ones that Matty name dropped that you had yet to see. He said that you could watch them together, but you said if that’s the case, then you’d be making him watch some Rom Coms that he’d yet to see because he thought they were too cringe, but he would trust your judgement.

You name a few, and Matty ends up scorning you for watching La La Land and you automatically defend it. Telling him that it has to be one of the ones that you watch together because it's full of music and romance, but then you warn him that he isn’t allowed to make fun of you when you inevitably cry at it.

Noooo baby, you can’t be upset when you’re with me, can’t have that xx Is the message you receive first, and he makes you coo at your phone but then he sends you another which makes you have a completely different reaction: However, I’m always here if you ever need a shoulder to put your legs on xxx

The gasp that you let out makes your family that you’re sitting around look at you and ask if you’re okay. Obviously, you just play it off like you’ve not just had a mini stroke in reaction to that message.

He really is going to be the death of you.

You take a minute to compose yourself, and you literally have nothing to reply to that other than scorning him. Because you really can’t be sexting him so early in the day.

Matthew…

It’s 11am!

His reply seems innocent, but you know he’s far from it. You can practically picture his smug grin as he typed out, Just giving you something to think about, take your mind off being sad x

You decide to scold him whilst also flirting, Yeah, and putting me in an entirely different mood xx

But Matty just teases you right back, Mhm good, think of me baby xx

You’re a menace xx You reply, biting your lip to try and stop the embarrassed smile that’s dying to make an appearance on your face.

When his reply comes through, all you can do is shake your head, You know it xxx

Flirting like this goes on for the rest of the day. Many times does he have your jaw dropping at his teasing messages, but you give it him right back most of the time.

You fear that he only liked you on your date because of your un-fussed humour that you can turn on and off, so you bring that back for some of your texts. You want to appear more confident to him and not always the embarrassed and flustered mess that you are most of the time when you FaceTime.

If anything continues after New Years, you’re sure that you’ll become accustomed to Matty and what he’s like, but you really don't want to get too ahead of yourself. So you just make yourself appear more in control of your emotions over text and you flirt with him first too when the opportunity arises, and Matty can’t lie he loves it. But he also loves when he can see that he’s got all flustered too. He just really likes you.

The day seems to pass the both of you by, never really being out of contact and before either of you know it, it’s quite late on in the evening and Matty has just crawled into the spare bedroom of his friend’s flat.

He’s just had a shower and he’s quite happy to actually just spend some time texting you without any other distractions. What are you up to baby? xx

Matty knows that you’re either still at Amelia’s family home, where you’d spent most of your afternoon and evening, or you’re about to be on your way home. Selfishly, he hopes that you’re alone again now so you can FaceTime each other.

But unfortunately that’s not going to happen as he finds out you’re still with your best friend when you reply:

Nothing just finding my 2022 dump pictures because Amelia is beside me pestering me to do one before the year is up x And a few seconds later, he also receives, What about you? xx

Matty tells you honestly, Still at Wheels and Alex’s flat, I had a drink so they said I could stay the night. Just got in bed xx

But he’s just gave you a nice opportunity to tease him so you say, Threesome sounds hot xx

And you’re left expecting a snarky comeback but your throat runs dry when he replies with a sarcastic, Please and a selfie of himself shirtless in bed, completely alone and follows it with, No sex for me tonight. I’d need you here baby xx

Biting your lip, you quickly type, Such a shame I’m not there, I’m sure you’ll survive xxx

You’re trying so hard not to react so Amelia doesn’t pry into your conversation but he makes it so hard for you when the next thing he says is, Don’t think I will, wanna facetime? xx

For your own sake you decide to make a joke out of it, just in hopes to get your heart rate back to normal and your cheeks to not be burning, Wow somewhere in the distance I can hear Too Shy playing xxx

Yet that continues to not work out for you because he has your breath hitching in your throat and your heart racing even faster when his text comes through and it says: Mmm no, I need to fuck you properly first before we do it over the phone xxx

Fucking hell.

You close your eyes and bite your tongue for a moment and will yourself not to have any reaction so your best friend doesn’t ask what was said. When you open your eyes you take a deep breath before typing out your reply as if that hadn’t taken your breath away and made you press your thighs together.

Have it all planned out do we? xx

And it’s barely a minute later he replies.

You know I do xx

The memory of him admitting to having enjoyed your pictures before, comes to the forefront of your mind then and now reading that text, you’re fully giddy knowing he wants you just as bad as you want him. So you ask for some more information, How’d you like to have me then? xx

Legs up and wide open for me preferably xx

Yep, you definitely need to go home.

Whilst you’d love to continue with the way this is going, you really can’t whilst you're still with Amelia. You end up responding a little sarcastically with, That sounds like a workout x

He replies with, You best be up for some cardio then baby x and you’re just glad it’s back to normal flirting that has you a bit more composed.

If it’s with you, can’t wait xx You cheekily say, a smirk on your face that he can’t see but he’s definitely picturing as he reads your text.

And it’s him saying, Awh yay, gym buddies! x next that has you hiccupping a laugh.

Fuck off, you dickhead😂 is all you say back, biting the inside of your cheek when Amelia looks up from her phone with a frown at the way you’re shaking from chuckles scaping your lips.

Thankfully she’s more entertained with what’s on her phone so when Matty says, Don’t start calling me that now, I might like it x back and you silently laugh at it, she ignores you.

You fake having known that and smartly reply, I was just trying to get you in the mood for what I’m about to post x

But his next text has you pausing and holding your breath as it says, I’m rock hard baby, don’t worry x and now all you’re left wondering is if he’s being honest or playful.

Trying not to hint the way that has you head scrambled, you tell him, I’ve got you covered baby x

A massive grin tugs at the corners of your lips when you see his next text reads, I hope I’m going to appear in it xx

But you want to keep teasing him some more so you only give him a vague, Maybe if I'm feeling generous xx to keep him on his toes.

If you could see him through your screen, you’d see the way he’s just smirking at his phone like a lunatic and how fast his fingers move on the keyboard to send, You better had baby xxx

Guess you’ll just have to wait and see xxx

You’re playing it so cool now but you’re very much looking forward to seeing his reaction to some of the pictures you’ve chosen to be in your next Instagram post.

You chuckle softly when he says, And how long will that wait be? xx

And Matty can hear your voice in his head when he reads that you reply with, Someone’s eager x

All he can say to that is the truth and it has you internally squealing when you read him say, For you? Always x

Matty is left to scroll though the things he’s missed whilst he’s been socialising today as you’re taking your time to reply. He likes to think he’s teased you enough to have you all flustered for him, but in reality you’re saying your goodbyes to Amelia and her family before getting in the car and driving a few minutes back to your parents.

As soon as you get in though, you select all the pictures you and Amelia had just chosen out and you post them captioning it as, 2022 you were the year dreams came true, onto my even more slutty 2023 x

Matty jumps as the notification comes through on his phone. He was waiting for your reply anyway but seeing that come up at the top of his screen has Matty wishing his phone would work faster so he could see what you’ve posted.

After a long agonising ten seconds, your profile loads along with your new post and he smiles at the caption you put on that all but quotes his words on your first date. But then his eyes are drawn up to the post itself and he’s eager to see what awaits and he likes it instantly.

The pictures you’ve posted range from cute to sinful, and Matty can’t help but love every single one. There's a few of you and Amelia, both of you having fun and it’s clear for anyone to see that you’re the best of friends and you love each other loads.

There's a few other behind the scenes pictures of a few of your dates. But Matty’s heart feels full when he gets to a picture where he can see you’ve got the Polaroids you and he took after your date pinned up. He’s so beyond glad he makes an appearance in these pictures.

There’s another picture of you in that Miu Miu mini skirt suit where you’re dramatically posing in the hallway of a hotel against the wall which has him groaning a little. There's another in your outfit from London Fashion Week, and then he’s met with a picture of you and Phoebe Bridgers taking a selfie where you’re pulling faces at your phone.

The second to last one makes him laugh too, and he knows it’s from Boxing day because it was a picture of your new blanket that features him on it. This time instead of you holding it up, it’s lay out on your bed and you have lay over yourself and you're grinning down at ‘him’ trying not to burst out laughing.

Matty is on his way to bully you for posting two pictures of him in your 2022 dump, and he’s about to call you a simp when he checks the last picture. And immediately you’ve got him in a chokehold.

His dick twitches in response to seeing it, and he palms himself to try and ease the way blood is rushing to it seeing this picture of you.

Whilst the second to last picture is a wholesome one of you lying down on your bed, this one is far from in. In this one, you’ve got your dress on that you wore for the GQ awards - and Matty knows it's the one because he’s looked at it far too many times at this point - and in this picture you’re propping yourself up on your elbow, whilst holding a rose down to your lips from above with your other arm.

It’s the dress that has Matty in pain though. The way your breasts look like their about to burst from the top of it, begging for the restricting material to be released, and the thigh slit of the dress is showing the curve of your arse as you’ve picked that leg up, crossing it over the other with your Louis Vuitton heels still on.

And now Matty is growing harder with the more he looks at you, and somehow he knows you’ve posted this one just for him. To toy with him, to edge him, to tease him, because that’s what he’s been doing to you all day.

Reluctantly, he tears his eyes off the picture of you to go back to message you, accusing, You did that last one on purpose x

Got my notifications on I see… It’s only been a minute since you posted so you decide to taunt him for it, Obsessed.

You’re certain he’s just rolled his eyes at you when he comes back with, Don’t let it go to your head xx

No way are you letting him get away with it though, instead you encourage him to do what he apparently normally does with your more revealing Instagram pictures. You reply, Enjoy yourself baby x

And you should be surprised, but you genuinely aren’t when he tells you, Call me that again please xx

You’re smirking at your phone at this point as you head upstairs to your room as you start typing out, Oh baby, do you also need my hand to take your mind off doing this at your best friend and her husband’s place? x

And then you throw yourself on bed to wait for his response, which comes back very quickly after and it hilariously says, Don’t be a smartarse baby, you’re making this weird x

You’re giggling to yourself, knowing he’s just trying to sneak his way out of the way you’re giving him a taste of his own medicine with your teasing so you call him out on it by sending him a text that reads, Even if I made it weird you’d enjoy it far more than you’d expect it, don’t fool yourself x

Just to toy with him a bit more and continue to test the waters with him, you make sure to add, I expect at least a thank you in return x

The, You can get a little more than that x that he sends next has you squealing into your pillow for a few seconds but when you bring yourself to look back at your screen and type a response, you see he’s sent something more that has you breathless.

It’s a picture of himself that reminds you quite a lot of the Consumption bit at the shows, for he has his free hand down his underwear and since he’s got no trousers on you can clearly see his We Are Kings tattoo in all its glory.

But what has your mouth going completely dry is the fact that it’s a live picture and when you curiously press on it to see if you can get anything else from it, you find yourself hearing Matty let out a soft moan of relief when his hand disappears under his pants.

All inhibitions are out of the window after that, and you let yourself be openly horny for him then when you say, I like that sound you made there x and as if that information wasn’t enough, you just need to let him know, I’ll be having fun with that later, thanks baby x

Matty had no idea noises could be hear from the picture so he pressed on it to hear it himself, cheeks blushing when he listens to what you’ve pointed out and in attempt to sound like he meant it, he types, I knew you’d enjoy that x

He finds himself thinking there had been a switch in you after he sent that and he loves to have it confirmed when he reads you’ve texted him, I hope you think of me the way I’ll be thinking of you later tonight x

Should I be expecting to hear my name all the way from Muswell Hill then? x He hopes you don’t hide back because this is just another taste of what he got that night in your room when you both got carried away and even though he stopped it before anything could happen, he’s been playing it on his mind and growing fonder of that side of you.

You decide you have to tease him then, because after the picture you just got, you want to give him something else to think about. Opening your camera, you immediately turn off live pictures because you’re not having the same thing happen to you.

After pulling your top off, you ruffle up your hair, just enough so it’s not neat as it lies around your shoulders and you lean back against your pillows again. Picking your phone up, you turn it landscape and you take a few pictures of yourself that show off some cleavage but leave out what he’s dying to see.

And you settle on one picture in particular where half of your face is cut off, but your mouth is open and it almost looks like you’re moaning in the picture. Your fingers grazing your collarbone, hair sprawled out over your pillow and covers over you just enough for him to be left begging for them to come off.

Mhmm hope you heard it xxx Is what you add as a caption to the picture and it’s a lie to say that you aren’t biting on your thumb nervous to see his reaction.

Matty takes a good minute after the picture comes through to process it all. His instant reaction is a loud groan that has him throwing his head back and cursing under his breath. He isn’t sure what else to say back other than, Fuck me x since his head is all scrambled from seeing you like that.

In 2 days xx You cheekily reply, and still feeling the power you have over him, you continue with, Good things come to those who wait x

His text comes faster than the last one and it only says, Cum* xxx

You giggle seeing that message come through, but with him still replying to you, you don’t think he’s doing with that picture of yours as you intended, so you tease him, Replying still??? Don’t edge yourself on my account baby xx

Watching the three dots come up on your phone feels like edging itself though. You’re hanging off his every word but you can’t let yourself feel ashamed about it. Especially when you see his response.

Oh but I love a bit of edging xx

You choke when that comes through. You had your theories but to see it written down and the fact he’d said it makes your mouth a little dry and you’re trying not to get flustered at all the thoughts running round your head.

You bite your lip as you type your reply, almost nervous to even be this forward over text with him. Holding your breath, you tap send on, You’ll change your mind on that after I have you begging to cum xx

The squeal that you let out when you see it change from sent to seen is obscene, and you find that you can’t look at your phone because you’re a little scared for his reply. When you see the three dots bubble up in the corner of the screen you end up throwing your phone to the end of your bed as you can’t handle the anticipation.

After a minute, you collect your phone knowing his reply will have come through by now. And when you see his message, You can’t do this to me right now baby x you can’t help but laugh.

Reading back over that has you smirking to yourself and gathering some more courage, you end up reminding him, You started it x and you scold him and you have to tease him one last time before you call it a night, Don’t give what you can’t take xx

Once again he shows you just how everything you give him, he can give you back three times worse when his reply comes through and you read, I’ll show you all I can give on new years baby, promise xx

It’s pure excitement that bubbles in the pit of your stomach and you’re sure that tonight you’ll go to bed dreaming of what that day will be like.

It’s not teasing anymore when you leave him with a, Can’t wait xxx

You can only hope that when you wake up the next morning, the day magically rushes by and the hours shorten just so you can finally go on the second date you’ve been thinking about for ages.

~*~*~*~ 30th December ~*~*~*~

“You know,” Matty raises his eyebrows at you through and you can’t help but take a screenshot of how cute he looks, “I think it’s really rude that we’re both back in London and you won’t let me come see you.”

Both of you got home today, you around midday and Matty just a few hours ago as he’d been driving for most of the day. You’ve been on your FaceTime about an hour and a half now, and Matty keeps complaining how you won’t let him come over.

But you really can’t, you’ve got no self restraint left at this point, you would never make it to the date if he came over, so you just keep with your initial plan.

You shrug him off again and say, “I like to build tension. What can I say?”

Matty sighs, his chest deflating as he pouts again, “I should have just driven an extra hour and come straight to see you.”

“No,” You shake your head, “Because you can’t be trusted keeping those hands of yours to yourself. You have my Instagram at your disposal if you wanna get yourself off tonight.”

Not that you have a leg to stand on. You’re practically itching to get your hands on him again. You’re dying to fuck him after your conversation last night. This truly has been the longest week of your life.

Matty closes his eyes and dramatically falls back onto his settee as he says, “You’re never letting me live it down, are you?”

“Nope,” You grin victoriously and you love the way he opens his eyes and he pretends to be annoyed about it, but the more he looks at your smile the more he can’t help but grin at you. You tease him a little more as you say, “Hope you enjoyed last night's treat too.”

“Alright, enough.” Matty says a little louder before he brings his phone closer to his face and warms you, “I’ll make you pay for it tomorrow.”

You smirk at that, and despite knowing exactly how he meant it, you turn the comment on its head and play innocent, “I don’t mind paying for our food.”

“I wasn’t talking about the food.” Matty smirks right back, knowing what you’re up to and he loves the way you can’t work up the courage

“I’m excited to take you out.” Matty smiles wholesomely, dropping the act now to be genuine.

“I’m excited to finally be going out,” You grin, your heart beating a little faster at the mere thought of what tomorrow could hold. “It feels like the longest three months we’ve had this planned for.”

Matty hums in agreement, “Longest of my life.”

You’ve got a feeling that after tomorrow, your life won’t ever be the same again. And you can’t wait.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A/N: We hope you enjoyed this one! Rest assured that New Years Eve is coming next, and it’s spicy! Thanks a million for reading, we can’t wait to hear your thoughts on this one! See you soon with the next part over at @imagine-that-100 blog! xx

Taglist: @red---moon @drinkurkombucha @vinylandcoffeecollection @better--oblivions @kennedy-brooke @faveficz @indierockgirrl @slutformattyhealy @kmsmedine @cecefaith @benkidgenius @avasjunkpile @spicyraccoonlordking @lizzylynch1 @ofbluesandyellows @kipperthedog2004 @slutforcoffein @madamedesmond @iamhallucinationnn @imagines4peeps @siwiecola @eaglestar31 @neverlieliliac @olliewhinchester @internetmultifandomfangirl @wellwellhereiam @dania7361 @kurdtbean @mawanji @jazzymariexoxoc @picklesandsprinkles @home-of-disaster @maelialuv @londonalozzy @ker0senebunny @golden-hoax @thouarntsage @belledawnidk @confusedcrayon @how2understand @harringt8ns @sheisaaantisocial @brumantrack @real-actual-human-person @eddiemunsonsgroupie @hemmings8376 @darlingbravebelle @defnotgracee @fabulouslyflamboyant5 @deamus-liv @itsjustsocialimplications @lauren--maex @ithinkivegonemad11 @stclen-sweethearts

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nancy-reads · 1 year ago

Text

you belong with me

pairing: fred weasley x reader

summary: fred wakes up after a wild night with his team to his phone buzzing nonstop after his latest tweet. Turns out he accidentally invited his old chemistry partner (and long-time crush) to the second game of the season. pining and fluff ensue.

warnings: a tiny little bit of spice at the end (it's really not that much i just want to warn you guys)

authors note: i promise the sequal to am i the one you think about will come out, i just got a bunch of inspiration to write this all of the sudden and wanted to share it with you guys!!

CROSSPOSTED TO AO3

As soon as Fred woke up, he regretted everything. His head was pounding, his throat was dry, and his muscles ached. Every part of him wanted to lie back down and never get up again.

His memories of last night were fuzzy at best. He was hanging with some of the boys from his team, celebrating after their first game of the season. Many beers were passed around, and for some reason, Fred had a vague memory of the team shouting at him over and over to do it.

Strange. They probably wanted him to take a bunch of shots or something. Usually, he’d be down, but not during football season. He had games to win, and Superbowls to play at.

Fred opened his eyes and blinked sleepily. As the world came into focus, he realized that his phone was buzzing, and had been for a while. He rolled over, chugged a glass of water, and grabbed his phone.

His jaw dropped as he saw the flood of notifications.

Fred Weasley’s Secret Crush?

Fred Weasley Invites Mystery Girl to Sunday’s Game Over Twitter

Football Hearthrobb Fred Weasley Has a Girlfriend?!

Holy shit.

There was only one person this could be about, and he might just die from embarrassment if he was right. You had probably completely forgotten about him, while he still liked all of your Instagram photos on his private account.

Fred scrolled through his notifications to see what looked like a million from Twitter alone, and a text from nearly everyone he knew.

Taking a deep breath, he tapped the Twitter app and clicked on his profile.

Fred Weasley @thebetterweasley

never would have gotten to the nfl without my college chem partner @ynln… tickets to the next game on me?

Fred’s eyes widened as he reread his tweet over and over again. He could feel his entire body heating up as he fought the urge to bury his head in his hands.

He just blew it. Entirely. You would never be interested in him now. You’d just think he wanted the attention, or worse, just for a quick fling.

Fred couldn’t imagine ever only wanting a fling from you. You and your gorgeous hair, beautiful eyes, and the way you talk way just mesmerizing. He could never focus during Intro To Chemistry because you’d be sat right next to him, eyes sparkling and pen flying as you took notes.

And he saw your grades. You were basically a genius, acing every test and perfecting every project. You were probably in grad school right now or in some sort of job for brilliant people who are saving the world.

You probably had no idea who he was.

After an embarrassingly long time spent moping, Fred got out of bed and reluctantly headed to the gym to work out. In between reps, he responded to the thousands of texts that he received, either congratulating him or calling him an idiot.

He definitely knew which ones were right.

His tweet had millions of likes by now, so there was no chance that you’d missed it. He’d been contacted by loads of news outlets, asking for a quote or an interview or anything about you, and he’d denied all of them. The passive-aggressive text from his manager, Alicia, was enough to make him want to delete every social media account he owned.

Fred had just finished his last stretch routine and was headed toward the showers when he got a notification.

Y/N L/N @ynln

maybe i’ll swing by…see if we still have chemistry

Fred could feel the heat spread from his neck all the way to his hairline. He wanted to giggle and kick his feet like a lovesick teenager. Maybe he didn’t ruin everything after all?

You tweeted it a minute ago..would it be weird for him to like it immediately?

Yes. Yes, it would.

That didn’t make him want to do it any less.

As Fred headed to the shower, a massive smile adorning his face, he immediately hit the call button because he had to tell someone about this. You responded to his tweet. He wanted to jump around and squeal like a kid with a crush.

Which was pretty accurate, to be quite honest.

“George,”

“Freddie, I just finished my workout, is this really that imp-”

“She responded to my tweet!!” Fred nearly shouted. He was bouncing on the balls of his feet, eyes shining with excitement. He didn’t recognize himself as he looked in the mirror. His smile was too big for his face, and his ears were bright red.

“It did have more than a million likes, Fred. I think she kind of had to.”

“Don’t ruin this for me George. I’ve liked her for so long, what do I even do now?”

Fred could hear George’s exasperated smile from miles away. “First, you are going to take a deep breath. You are a cool NFL football player, not a horny teenager. “

“Right. Yes.”

He took a deep breath, but his heart was still racing and the butterflies in his stomach would not go away. Come on Fred, you are gonna be normal about this. You can do it.

“You got that Fred?” George asked. Fred murmured an affirmative. “Okay, now you are gonna get tickets to the VIP booth, four of them.”

“Four? Why-”

“Because one of them is for Mum, as you know she will get there somehow if you’ve invited a girl.”

“That’s fair, actually.”

“Also, the public loves her so I assume that your girl will want to meet her too.” Fred pointedly ignored how his heart raced at the words “your girl.” George continued, “You’re also not going to be the asshole who makes her go alone, so give her a couple tickets for her friends.”

“When did you get so smart with girls?”

George chuckled. “Oh this is all Angelina. I don’t know anything.”

“Yeah, that makes a lot more sense, Georgie.”

“Hey!”

Fred hung up as he orders four VIP tickets for the game. He immediately sends one to his mum, but he pauses before sending it to you.

see you at the game! you better be wearing red and gold…

Fred added a winky face, then immediately deleted it. He didn’t want to seem too juvenile or worse, weird. His thumb hovered over the blue send button, rereading the DM over and over. At last, he admitted defeat and sent a screenshot to Geoge.

F: does this sound okay?

G: yes. stop worrying.

F: you act as if you were not the same way when you asked angelica to the yule ball

G: shut up

Fred snorted as he switched back to Twitter. He took a deep breath, steeled himself, and pressed send.

For the rest of the week, Fred practiced harder than ever. All eyes were gonna be on him this week, and he needed a win. More importantly, you were gonna be at this game, and he knew who he wanted to dedicate his touchdown to.

He’d been thinking about it since that freshman year chemistry class when he was nothing but a rookie tight end, and the NFL was nothing but a dream. The crowd goes wild, but the only person he’s looking at is you.

Christ, when did he become such a romantic?

He felt a smile split across his face when his phone buzzed during a break.

Y: i looked through my closet and i don’t know if i have any red and gold…might have to steal something of yours

F: stay after the game and maybe we’ll see

The two of you didn’t text often, maybe a couple of times a day, but it was always a highlight. Locker room talk had devolved into just making fun of Fred’s puppy dog eyes and lovesick smile whenever he opened his phone.

Someone from the press got a picture of him smiling at his phone, and the internet exploded even more.

Fred Weasley Caught Blushing At His Phone During Practice

Fred Weasley’s Smile Has the Internet Swooning

Fred Weasley’s Mystery Girl: Who Is She?

Part of him wanted to feel embarrassed with all the attention, but he was too grateful that you had finally given him the time of day to really think about it. He was laser-focused on every play and worked extra hard at the gym. They would win the game this week, even if it was purely by his will.

Fred had never been this nervous for a game before. Every single playoff game, championship, or even the Superbowl hadn’t prepared him for this feeling.

His girl was up there, and he had to impress you today.

The crowd screamed louder than ever as he ran onto the field with his team. There were signs everywhere, asking if you were here and making jokes about Fred being a loverboy. He couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across his face as he looked around the stadium, taking it all in.

There was nothing he loved more than football, and having other people love him for it was even more special.

Still, Fred tried to catch your eye in the VIP booth, and his smile widened when he saw you talking to his mum. Embarrassing as it was, everyone loved her, so she was probably the quickest way to your heart. Eventually, though, his mum took pity on him and pointed him out to you.

And shit, your smile when Fred finally looked into your eyes. The two of you were far away, so it was hard to tell, but he already knew it was beautiful. He stared at you, probably for longer than was considered normal until the whistle blew and he was forced to follow his team.

This was probably the best game his team had ever played. Everyone was in sync, and the plays they’d worked on all summer were gaining them yards across the field. Everyone could feel the energy in the stadium as people cheered his name.

The only problem, Fred hadn’t yet scored a touchdown. Halftime had just ended, and the team was up thirty-one points. He could feel the coaches wanting to pull him out and let the best people rest while they had such a great lead, however, he silently begged them to let him stay in.

Just one good play and I’ve got this.

And his chance finally came halfway through the third quarter. They were only a few yards away from the endzone, and Fred knew that this was his chance as Oliver called the play.

The whistle blew, and Fred didn’t even see the other players as he sprinted into the endzone, dodging anyone who attempted to get in his way. He and Oliver were in perfect sync as he threw the ball straight into Fred’s hands, securing another six points for the team.

The crowd screamed as the touchdown was announced, and Fred couldn’t stop himself from doing a little victory dance. His eyes found your booth as he headed to the sideline, and he blushed from head to toe at your reaction. You were jumping around and screaming with joy (he hoped) and you looked adorable.

In a moment of confidence, he caught your eye, placed his hand on his chest, and held out half a heart, mouthing “This one is for you.”

Part of him wondered if he was coming on too strong, but the other part was enamored with you as you clasped your hand over your beautiful smile and held half a heart back.

The crowd let out an “aww” as you showed up on the screen beside him, and he couldn’t stop himself from beaming at the nearby camera. He could feel people tapping away at their phones to post on social media, but he didn’t care. You were cheering for him.

The game continued, and Fred was mostly put on the sidelines to give some of the rookies a chance to play, as it was looking pretty good for his team. He couldn’t stop himself from stealing glances at your booth, so much so that the team was beginning to notice.

“Fred, loverboy, the game is this way,” Lee Jordan teased.

“Staring at your mom, Weasley?” Andrew Sloper asked.

Even Oliver, who usually had a stick up his ass, joined in on the fun. “God, Fred, you’d think Taylor Swift was here or something.”

Fred was happy to laugh with them. He hadn’t remembered feeling this giddy in a long time, and he couldn’t push the smile from his face. Part of him was eager for the game to be over, so he could go see you.

Still, his hands shook and butterflies erupted from his stomach when he thought about heading up to your booth. Would conversation flow? Would you even like him in person after all these years? Did you only come for free tickets or for internet clout?

That wasn’t it, he knew. You were too kind, too good to do that when it was obvious how head over heels he was for you. Still, part of him worried.

Fred was sure his team was sick of him by now. He’d been agonizing over his hair for the past thirty minutes as he prepared to leave the locker room and finally see you. He’d blown you a kiss as he left the field, and he was wondering if he’d come on too strong, and clearly if his hair was wrong it would ruin everything.

Maybe he was panicking a little bit. He’d texted you a few minutes ago, giving you instructions on how to get to the family and friends area outside the locker room. He hoped his mum would guide you there, as the last thing he wanted was for you to get lost and attacked by rabid football fans. You didn’t deserve that.

After a few more minutes, he realized that his hair was hopeless (it looked fine) and decided he would rather not leave you waiting. With a last look in the mirror and a deep breath, he headed out of the locker room.

The area was crowded; full of girlfriends, wives, children, and all sorts of family and friends of the team. There was a buzz in the room of people talking, laughing, and generally celebrating the win. The sounds got even louder as he entered, and Fred could see people acting like they weren’t staring at him.

Still, he wasn’t paying attention to anything but you as you locked eyes across the room. You gave him a shy smile, and he couldn’t stop himself from beaming as he headed straight for you.

“Hey,” you said. Your eyes were piercing, and very distracting. He couldn’t seem to form a thought as he stared into them.

“Hey,” he said back, stupidly. He hesitated for a moment as the butterflies felt more like stampeding wildebeest in his stomach. “Did you enjoy the game?”

There was a teasing lilt to your voice as you responded. “I don’t know. It was alright, I suppose.”

“Alright?” Fred asked in mock annoyance. He placed a light hand on your back as he guided you out of the family area. “I guess next time I’ll give my free VIP tickets to someone else.”

You snorted. “As if you have someone else to give them to.”

“Hey! I have plenty of people to give tickets to.”

“Like who?” you asked. “Your mom?”

Fred smiled and placed a dramatic hand on his chest. “You dare insult Mother Weasley?”

You smiled and stared at the ground as you shook your head. “Never. We had a great time hanging out tonight.”

He gave you a soft smile. “I’m glad. I have a feeling that you’re going to be her new favorite.”

As the two of you neared the press area, Fred straightened and pressed his hand slightly closer to your back. He didn’t want to be too forward, however, he knew how aggressive the press could be. “For this next part, just be careful of the reporters. Our security is really good, and honestly,” he chuckled a bit, “I could take most of them, but I don’t want anyone making you uncomfortable.”

You nodded and pressed a bit closer to him, making him blush even harder.

It was a small hallway, and the press was kept behind some silver barriers that allowed the two of you some space to walk. Cameras flashed and videos recorded Fred and you walking past. You had the prettiest smile in the world, and Fred couldn’t stop looking at you as you gave an especially beautiful one to the cameras.

He’d have to find that photo later.

Fred was desperate to grab your hand as the two of you walked toward his convertible, but his hands were sweaty and shook at the thought. You looked gorgeous in the moonlight, and he couldn’t stop his eyes from dropping to your lips.

As the two of you sped off, you looked at him and raised an eyebrow. “I believe I was promised a jersey after the game.”

He smirked. “I’m pretty sure I said we’ll see.”

“So you don’t want to see me in your jersey next game?”

“Who said you were getting invited to my next game?”

“Seemed like someone enjoyed having me there tonight,” you said, looking away from him, a teasing smile on your face.

Fred smiled. “When did you get so confident? I remember it took forever for us to actually talk when we met.”

“I know it may surprise you Freddie, but some of us grew up a bit after college.”

“Really?” he gasped, dropping his jaw. “That's crazy.”

“And,” you added, “some of us have learned how to tell when someone is flirting with us.”

That's when Fred’s jaw dropped for real, and red spread all the way to his ears. He turned back to the road, focusing on driving as hard as he could. Letting you see the giddy beam on his face was not an option. Your hand moved toward the center console, right next to his, and every part of him itched to hold it.

He cleared his throat. “So, uh…how have you been?”

He listened to you describe your life and your job as if he had not been stalking you on Instagram since he met you. It seemed like you had thrived since college, and Fred felt his heart soar when he heard how happy you were. You deserved everything, and Fred silently hoped he would be there to see you get it.

As the two of you pulled into the parking lot, Fred caught you staring at him, biting your lip as he backed into the spot. He smiled to himself as he got out of the car and opened the door for you.

“Dinner?”

Dinner was perfect. Fred couldn’t stop laughing and smiling in your presence, and it seemed like you were having a great time as well. Every so often the conversation would lull, and he would catch you staring at him as the two of you enjoyed your meal.

He did his share of staring as well, but he hoped that he was less obvious about it.

(He wasn’t.)

Fred finally found the courage to grab your hand as the two of you were leaving the restaurant, with your head thrown back in a laugh that rocked his world. You just looked so adorable that he had to hold you, even if it was just your hand.

He knew it was the right choice when you immediately squeezed his hand. He squeezed back, which caused you to do it again, beginning an all-out hand-squeezing war that only ended when the two of you were laughing too hard to continue.

Christ, your laugh was just so beautiful. You looked so free and so happy when you simply threw your head back and laughed, letting your joy overtake your entire body. Fred could feel himself staring, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to be a part of your sunshine.

Too soon, you stopped laughing and just stared back at him. He held your gaze for a moment, letting his eyes flick to your lips every so often. He stepped closer to you. Close enough to touch you. Close enough to lean in…

Close enough to kiss you.

You’re eyes slid shut as Fred leaned in and placed a hand under your chin to tilt your face up to meet his. Slowly, so terribly slowly, he leaned in and pressed his lips to yours.

Your lips were soft, and they seemed to meld with his perfectly. Fred could feel his pulse racing as you tugged on the lapels of his jacket to get closer. Christ, he just wanted to be closer to you, closer, and closer.

You opened your mouth slightly, and Fred took that opportunity to part your lips and deepen the kiss. He felt you inhale sharply and panicked for a moment until he heard your small moan at the movements of his tongue. All Fred knew was that he wanted to hear that sound again, and again, and again until you couldn’t make it anymore, until you were tired and sick with pleasure-

You gasped as you pulled away from him. Your lips were raw and red, matching the blush that colored your cheeks. It was silent for a moment as the two of you gazed at each other.

Fred smirked. “So…do you think we still have chemistry?”

#this isn't inspired by recent events at all #nope #not me #fred weasley x reader #fred weasely x yn #fred weasley #harry potter #fanfic #xreader #writing #sports romance

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rintarousgirl · 1 year ago

Text

i wanna be yours — 5. star treatment

✦ - Y/N is a small business owner, offering her services not only as a designer but an at-home makeup artist and cosmetic producer as well. She's perfectly content with her small life when she's approached by the manager of the INARIZAKI band, asking for her to fill the position of backstage artist on short notice. Needing the money, and wanting the experience, Y/N agrees. Little does she know of the fatal attraction she will share with the band's lead, Suna Rintarou

a/n: ik this chapter is a bit short, and that it's a bit overdue but i've been so busy LMAO. p.s i know about the typo in oikawa's post shh. anyways, i hope you all enjoy lovies!

You woke up in bed with a splitting headache, the pounding pain behind your eyes being near unbearable. A weak groan escaped your mouth as you threw a hand over your eyes to block the sun.

Thankfully, drunk you had the courtesy of leaving a glass of water and an aspirin on the bed side table. Slowly, squinting as your eyes struggled to adjust to the light, you swallowed down the aspirin and took big mouthfuls of water to ease your dry throat.

As you think to recall last night, you stand up to change out of your clothes. You're sweaty, but you notice that you are wearing a change of clothes. They're a bit baggy on you, clearly made for someone a lot taller than you were. You rub your head, trying to recall what had happened.

"You're covered in flour," Rintarou points out from his spot at the counter. You glare at him, before looking down to your soiled clothes.

"I never said I was a clean cook. The messier it is, the better it tastes."

He hums non-committedly and takes a sip from his tea. "I'll go steal some clothes from Osamu, stay here."

"Where am I supposed to go?" You huff and turn back to your pizza.

Right, you had made homemade pizza with Rintarou. So, you were now wearing Osamu's clothes. Lovely. From before that though your memory goes iffy. You struggle to remember a good amount of it, as if you'd blacked out or something. Which technically you probably had. You remember vomiting, and hanging out with Suna for the rest of the night till you were sober enough to drive yourself home.

After peeling off your clothes and showering, you head back into your room. Your studio apartment was small, which meant you had communal washing and drying. You'd make sure to wash Osamu's clothes as quickly as possible.

Picking up your phone, your eyes widen at the surplus of notifications. You had over thirty text messages, and over thirty thousand notifications from twitter. You could get used to a lot of twitter notifications with your business, but all that in one night seemed impossible to you.

With slightly trembling hands, you opened twitter, feeling a pit grow in your stomach as you scrolled through your notifications.

Despite all the negative posts from fans, you find yourself smiling at the pictures from last night. After making pizza, you and Rintarou had joined the others, dancing and playing games until everyone was either black out drunk or exhausted. You also remember doing karaoke with Yachi, laughing at the video of the two of you that Atsumu had posted.

Exiting twitter, you switch to your messaging app. You notice a few short messages between you and Rintarou, and that you'd gotten Yachi and Osamu's numbers in your phone at one point. Instead, you look at the texts from your friends.

Sighing, you gnaw on your lip. You send a quick to Kenma, Bokuto, and Kuroo assuring them that you were okay and that you'd explain later before pressing on the call button.

It rings only once before Akaashi picks up. "Y/N? Are you alright?" are the first words out of his mouth, and you swallow softly with a sigh. You collapse back down on your bed, rubbing at your eyes.

"I'm alright, 'Kash. Don't worry."

He huffs. "You could've told me that last night."

"I know, I'm really sorry. I, uh, I went to an after party and I got a bit drunk."

That quiets him a bit. "You never get drunk. Not really at least."

"I know," you groan, feeling a bit more regret seep into you. "I was being stupid, okay? I'm sorry I didn't text you or anything. I know you worry a lot."

"It's alright. You're an adult, Y/N. I just...I wouldn't want you to get hurt when I could've done something about it."

"Well, don't worry. I don't plan on doing that again anytime soon. I mean...I embarrassed myself plenty."

There's a teasing tone to Akaashi's next words. "I saw. Kuroo went crazy when he found out you were working for INARIZAKI. I managed to convince him not to harass you about it though. You puked on him, huh?"

"Thanks," you say dryly, "but don't remind me." You drag a hang down your face, shame burning on your cheeks. "It was so bad. But technically, I puked in the bowl so not on him."

"That's still bad."

"I'm going to hang up on you. Why can't we talk about like...I don't know, the pizza or something."

Akaashi laughs, and you find yourself smiling despite it all. "Whatever let's talk about your adventures in person. Favorite cafe at three?"

You hum. "Favorite cafe at three," you confirm.

As you're getting ready, your phone dings with a text message. Absent-mindedly you pick it up and open it.

<- previous | next -> | masterlist

★ - suna was not very chill when he sent that text. he was on the other side of the screen acting like a nervous wreck

★ - osamu's the smaller twin compared to atsumu seeing as atsumu still did have his vb career, just not as long. that's why his clothes aren't completely baggy on y/n (and are what she's wearing in the photo on suna's twt)

★ - akaashi spent most of the night awake waiting for you to text him till bokuto eventually convinced him to sleep for at least a few hours

taglist:

@mannaornot \ @gojoscumslut \ @sunarots \ @alienvarmint \ @tojirin \ @tkooooop \ @cheriesdear \ @shotenvinsoot \ @wolffmaiden \ @riiceandsoup \ @thebrownemo \ @vivian-555 \ @effmigentlywithachainsaw \ @rukia-uchiha-98 \ @weird0o0 \ @seiamor \ @rory-cakes \ @blue-violin \ @reveusecherie \ @hellokittylover9 \ @yourlocal-bunny \ @keniza \ @cerberuspuppy1 \ @baramii \ @kirbyscreeper

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pablotorresgf · 1 year ago

Text

no te contaron mal- Pablo Gavi (english version)

after an argument, pablo let’s his actions speak louder than his words.

warnings: curse words,cheating, asshole! gavi, gaslighting. no happy ending

#notes: i’m a little rusty with my writing, feedback is appreciated. please like & reblogㅤᵕ̈ (lowercase intended)

you were sat on your couch trying to shut the world around you. you couldn’t stand it anymore, you couldn’t stand not being able to voice your thoughts around your boyfriend without an argument spurring up afterwards. a relationship was supposed to be built up with trust and communication, you always told yourself that but you never knew when it disappeared in your relationship.

after a while you opened your eyes and let out a sigh. your eyes adjusted to the light, looking around you were trying to locate your phone. feeling somewhat calmed down you unlocked your phone and opened the messages app, you clicked on the pinned conversation and a photo of Pablo and you for your year anniversary adorned the contact information. you sent him two text; one asking where he was, the other reminding him to be careful, no matter how mad you were at him you could never wish for him to be in danger. swiping out the conversation you opened up your best friends messages, your eyes skimmed the last texts you had sent her, paragraphs of you telling her about the argument Pablo and you had. averting your eyes to the bottom of your texts you saw that she read them but never answered. weird

the digital clock on the coffee table read 2:56 am and you decided to get yourself ready for bed. heading upstairs you entered the bathroom and focused on getting the mascara clumps from under your eyes off your face and brushing your teeth. leaving the bathroom you made the bed and decided to try to go to sleep now knowing if you’ll be able to while Pablo wasn’t home.

the next morning you woke up and patted down the spot next to you. empty. you opened your eyes while trying to adjust to the light around your room, you sat up and reached for your phone on the nightstand. your notification bar showing you a bunch of notifications some from your friends, others from your siblings, a handful from twitter, and from your best friend. opening your siblings text first you saw all of them sending you pitiful texts and a lot of links to post, and articles. clicking on the links pictures of your best friend leaving a house party in a disheveled state hand in hand with your Pablo. you were in disbelief and denial, there had to be a reasonable explanation on why your best friend and your boyfriend were leaving a house party hand and hand and looking like that, but as you opened your best friends messages, you knew all the allegations and rumors were true. rows and rows of sorrys, and he said you guys weren’t together were displayed on your screen. you scoffed and left her on read, she wasn’t worth a reply from you not now and especially fucking never.

hearing a door closing you head shot up, hearing footsteps approaching your room and the door opening you were face to face with your cheater of a boyfriend.

“you better have a good ass explanation for this Pablo, or god hopes i don’t fucking knock some fucking sense into you, you prick.” you yelled out exasperated.

“i’m pretty sure y/b/n already texted you what happened, and you saw all those articles, there’s nothing for me to explain.” he replied nonchalantly.

“what the fuck Pablo, how can you just stand there so calmly, we’ve been together for over a god damn year and you go throw all away and with my fucking best friend, you’re a coward! how did it even happen, why the fuck did it even happen?” you yelled in need of answers

“i wasn’t thinking right, and she sent me a text telling me that there was a house party and that if i wanted to go and i accepted. i got there and we were just talking and then we kissed, it turned into more than that and she guided me into this room. the urge and curiosity got the best of me i just wanted to see what it was like if me and her… you know.” He was going to continue before you cut him off

“no i don’t fucking know Pablo because never has it crossed my mind to go fuck your best friend, never! did you always think of her like that or what?”

“ no y/n i didn’t but she was all over me and i was drunk out of my mind and she was there and you weren’t. you weren’t there with me so it’s your fault i got drunk, you were the reason i was drinking if you had just not caused the argument none of this would’ve happened! at least i didn’t do it with multiple girls it was just her that’s all. it meant nothing and you know that.” he finished off

“oh! do i really know that? and what do you want me to do to get on my knees and thank you that it was only her? huh! it would’ve hurt less if it was some random fucking girl but no you wanted to sleep with my best friend someone i’ve known for years!” you yelled back while getting off the bed in search of a bag and your necessities. you didn’t even pay to mind Pablo following you around you just wanted to grab your shit and leave.

“what are you doing?” he said while grabbing the bag from your hands. you looked at him like if he was stupid and snatched your bag back. he continued to pester you until you burst.

“you’re fucking delusional if you think i’m staying with a cheater that fucked my best friend!”

“but i still love you.”

that made you laugh. you genuinely laughed in his face and looked at him to see if he was seriously you couldn’t believe what you were hearing. he didn’t love you, his actions spoke way louder than his words.

“i’ll rather be dead than love a disgusting person like you.”

#pablo gavi x reader #soccer imagine #fc barcelona #football imagine #spotify #pablo gavi angst

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ventithedrunkbardehe · 2 years ago

Text

Hello hello

I'm baackk~

Warnings: English is nkt my first lanuage so there might be grammar errors, also typo's mighz happenen here and there, also swearing

So let's get started shall we?

Streamer!reader accidentaly revealing their relationship with the Xsoleil boys ft.Nina!

You were just doing an ordinary drinking stream, or so you planned to. You didn't realize how much you got caught up in drinking and started answering the questions in the chat. You didn't realize how much of a bad idea it was beacuse of your drunked state. You took a sip of your drink as you read out the next question

'Is there anyone that has your interest in NijisanjiEN' - you rewd the question out lous and without even thinking you answered to it. "Mhmm... And I'm so glad that he's actually my boyfriend..." - you said as you took another sip.

Ver

"I mean who wouldn't love Ver... He's just so perfect, and handsome, and cute, and everything else you could ask for..." - you continued babbling about your boyfriend as the whole chat turned into a mess, both hate and love coming from fans. You would've kept going unless Nina called you up that you should stop the stream since you were so drunk and you didn't realize what were you talking about. You argued a bit with her ws she tried to convince the fans thru the phone call that you were saying nonsense and it was just beacuse you were drunk. But everyone knowing that you're one of the most honest streamers out there, why would you be babbling lies about being together with Ver. Nina luckily got you to turn the stream off and go to bed, but you weren't ready what would happen tomorrow.

As you woke up the next day, you're phone was blown up by how many notifications you got from Twitter. As you opened the app you saw several clips about you talking about how much youlove Ver and so glad that he's your boyfriend. You saw how many other streamer friend of yours tried to protect you, as you got embarrassed from reading all the tweets about your mistake, you finally got yourself together and wrote an apology tweet saying that you were sorry and that too drunk to even know what were you talking about, you didn't mean to say boyfriend as in a relationship but as a good guy friend. After ypu posted the tweet out you immediately called Ver up.

"I'm so sorry about everything honey, I was just-" -he cut into your sentence

"It's okay, but next time make sure that you don't get caught up in drinking and start spilling tea about our relationship okay? Anyways I'll go over to your place in a few minutes okay?" - he said

"Okay, love you" - you said as you giys put the phone down.

'This will be hurting for a while...' - you tought as you looked at the screen of your monitor that had twitter open.

Hex

"I mean who wouldn't like Hex... Just look at him... He has such an attractive voice... His humor... Ahh I could talk about him all day." - you said. You continued talking about him as you took several sips from you drink. You didn't ralize thst you were talking about him for like 5 minutes straight untill Mom came to the rescue and called you up to stop the stream which took her like almost 10 minutes beacuse your drunk ass didn't realize what was going on and you guys ended up arguing untill she finally got you to end the stram and to to bed.

When you woke up your head was hurting like hell, as you remembered back what did you do last night's stream and immediately went up on twitter to see clips about you talking about you dear boyfriend Hex, and others trying to protect you. When you got yourself together you wrote an apology tweet, saying thst it was just a big missunderstanding that the word boyfriend you meant was not the 'in realtionship' term but it was as 'guy friend' term. Hoping that people will belive you as you posted it. After a few minutes of continuing reading the tweets about your mistake your phone buzzed. It was you boyfriend Hex. You immediately pickee upand started apologizing to him about the accident.

"It's okay... Hopefully it will go down in a week or two..." - he said as you were on the verge of tears. "But to be honest... I never imagined that you love me this much" - he chuckled at your reaction as teased you.

"Oh shut up... This is embarrassing" - you said as you huffed and joined to laugh with him.

Doppio

"Pio-chan is just so cute... He's like a giant baby... His laugh... ahh so cute. Everything about him is so cute..." - you continued babbling about your boyfriend. Some of your streamer friends in the chat tried stopping you, writing to you on social media, but Nina saved the night. She called you up talking you down from continueing the stream as you were drunk drunk. After a few minutes of talking and arguing a little she finally got you to stop the stream and get yourself together and go to bed.

The next day you woke up with a terrible headache from being drunk yesterday night.

"Fucking hangovers..." - you said as you tried to get out of bed and get some painkillers. After ypu took them, even tho your head was still hurting you went up on twitter to see everything about your mistake that was clipped and posted everywhere. Everyone was talking about your little tea spilling. You saw some of your friends trying to stop the people from talking about these matters, but everyone knew that they won't die down from just these tweets. You were reading the tweets about yourself as the phone buzzed on your desk. It was Doppio. You didn't really want to answer it being a bit scared how he would react to it. But you eventually picked it up.

"Good morning darling~" - he said lively.

"Good morning" - you said back to him, it was hearable on your voice that you were nervous and embarrassed.

"Are you worried about yesterday night?" - he asked in a softer tone.

"Mhm... I'm sorry" - you answered.

"It's alright it's alright! My company might kill me but let's tell the fans ye? I mean it won't die down until they get to know the thruth yea? So why not make it easier for everyone?" - he said in a reassureing voice.

"I-... Pio-chan... Are you okay? Are you drunk? As I know I was the one drowning myself in drinks and not you." - you asked worriedly laughing a bit.

"Yepp a 100% sure!" - he answered immediately.

The two of you agreed to announce your guy's relationship and after tweeting it out the both you turned your social media's off. Soon enough he arrived at your place and you guys went and played games.

@lonelysimpfor2dmen thank you for the request ❤️ sorry thst it took this long 😭🙏

Hope you guys enjoyed it! Have a nice day! Byeee!

#nijisanji #nijien #nijisanji en #nijisanji en x reader #xsoleil x reader #xsoleil #ver vermillion #hex haywire #doppio dropscythe x reader #doppio dropscythe #ver vermillion x reader #hex haywire x reader #nijisanji x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #x reader

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sizzlingpatrolfox · 6 months ago

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it's hard to imagine that if they actually dated she would be posting bts content from 2020 to prove it. like she would have to have something she took herself. she has been stoking these rumors for years and she has yet to show something that proves they have ever even met irl. i hope the rumor that he moved out before enlisting is true because this is getting old.

"she has been stoking these rumors for years and she has yet to show something that proves they have ever even met irl." Exactly, yeah.

There was someone yesterday or the day before who sent an ask arguing in favor of every story she posted the other day and how she couldn't have possibly gotten those from anywhere else when she very much could've. All I'm gonna say is people have literally worn Jimin's fake love outfits because somehow fans got a hold of it, and someone was able to get his mail from BTS own home. Also, when that guy posted the heart jikook photo and some other Jimin photo from Japan in like 2018/2019, everyone immediately and unanimously agreed that he couldn't possibly be their friend anymore because if he was he wouldn't have posted those photos. And I agreed with that because I've also seen how Jimin seems to handle his personal relationships and to keep their exposure to a minimum. We don't even see social media posts with sungwoon or saeon who are also somewhat public figures.

But I really don't care about "debunking" any of it, I think the back and forth between "this is legit proof" and "that isn't legit proof" is stupid and annoying.

I've been told before stuff like why do you get so defensive about it but it's not defensiveness. It's annoyance because I really seriously geniunely don't care if it's real or not, and it's annoying that people want me so bad to care. Like why does it matter??? I don't have that parasocial of a relationship with Jimin, but have those anons stopped to think they might have a parasocial relationship with ME? Because I really can't understand why they want me to care so bad.

Last December, I was on holidays right, and I sleep with my phone next to my bed and the phone vibrated like three or four times in a row and it woke me up (I have really light sleep). I checked it and it was just before 7am and the phone had been vibrating because of tumblr notifications. I opened them and it was I SWEAR like 3 or 4 messages recounting every single instagram story the actress had ever posted or some shit. I blocked that anon immediately. Nothing had even happened!!!! That person just felt like obsessing over this woman's instagram and that was it. So they had to come and give me all their "proof" and accusing me for not believing in it.

I've also realized how much ammo she gets by doing these slight, sneaky """reveals""" because it's actually what gets people talking more than they would if she just posted a photo of Jimin sitting on the toilet. People post her stories, then go check them, then check her comments, a couple of hours later they check to see if she's deleted them, etc etc. All while others on twitter were sharing the stories left and right and comparing it with the bangtan bomb and trying to decipher if it was really Jimin behind that flower emoji.

So, yeah that's really it. Also not directed to you, but to some other people. Don't ask me or expect me to care... I might've cared years ago when I still believed Jimin and Jungkook were a thing but I've been saying more like two years already that they're not fucking each other, so there's literally no reason at all for Jimin dating to ever affect me. And even when I did believe they were fooling around, I never ever said "they're totally in a committed exclusive real relationship and have been married since 2015" because I've never believed that.

I've been a fan of Harry Styles since I was 15 years old and it has never bothered me to see him making out in public with the whole lineup of Victoria Secret's models because I've just never been that person. So even if it wasn't the reaction people expected me to have, you're just gonna have to believe me when I say Jimin dating rumours do not bother me.

Lastly and I really doubt I'll be addressing this topic again unless something really significant happens, there really isn't necessary "proof" for me to take this seriously. I just don't have enough information to believe in this rumour and that's just it. I'm not going to be thinking harder and trying to connect barely-there dots for someone else. If there is something there, or there was at some point in the past, I'm gonna need taennie level of proof.

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brandogenius · 9 months ago

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hi love can u write lucy having a crush on fem!reader like maybe reader is on booktok or something? a blurb or an one shot pls pls pls

EEEE!!!

‼️RPF‼️ BLURB

lucy having a crush on fem!reader who is maybe quite famous on booktok/ youtube as a content creators who makes videos / content dedicated and based on books

fem reader having a dedicated video every month and on tiktok where she reviews her favourite books she’s read this month and lucy EATS IT UP

lucy stumbled across your content one day when tweeting a post asking for more book recommendations. a lot of people were sending links to your tiktok and your channel and lucy got intrigued.

lucy was like “damn. this bitch gets me” because she’s so specific with her books and thoughts she doesn’t think anyone else can get understand / relate but you do

she honestly falls for you the minute she finds your tiktok of rating your favourite wlw book. how you go in dept on it and express how it’s hard to find good proper wlw representation in movies and books. lucy’s like “ok yeah i’m down for her real bad”

ends up following you on youtube AND tiktok and it comes up on those boygenius update accounts LUCY HAS FOLLOWED READER ON TIKTOK!!

after a couple of weeks / months, you follow her back too (she wasn’t even expecting it) she just kinda woke up one morning to the tiktok notification READER HAS FOLLOWED YOU BACK and seen you’ve followed her back on twitter too.

honestly lucy gained like confidence in that moment on an impulse decision she decides to send you a dm asking if you want to go for coffee but the way she sends it in this meme format that’s like [the office, season7, ep 18, minute 14:45] and you look at the office at rhag minute and it’s quoted “shouldve burnt this place when i had the chance”

anyway lucy ends up doing that in your dms but with a book!’ and it’s like [book name, chapter 5 sentence 3] and if you were to look at this and decipher it, it makes out ‘so, want to go get coffee sometime?’ and it’s so nerdy but also so cheesy and cute because she knows you’ll get the reference since it’s the latest book you read.

you replying back to bed with like [book name, chapter 5 sentence 5] ‘sure, where too?’

#pom writes #anons #lucy dacus x reader #lucy dacus fluff #lucy dacus x fem reader #lucy dacus one shot #lucy dacus au #boygenius fanfic #boygenius au #boygenius one shot #boygenius x reader

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starry-hughes · 9 months ago

Note

Kendall’s period is irregular but when it comes she gets it really bad and Elias is always there to take care of her

kendall skips practice that morning. she couldn’t get out of bed and had to call to tell everyone she wasn’t able to go to practice. she almost cringed at the notification from twitter saying she was absent from practice for a “medical (non-injury) reason”.

elias got home with breakfast and some comfort items. the first day was the worse for her always. and it wasn’t like she could prepare since she was so irregular. she just woke up and realized she would have to change the sheets and sobbed from pain as elias coaxed her into the shower this morning.

“hi älskling, how are you feeling?” he says as he grabs her heating pad from the nightstand drawer and gets it set up. “i’m hurting bad,” she mumbles. “i brought some medicine and snacks. did you drink your water?”

“yeah. i’m not really hungry though.”

“i need you to eat though, help get your caffeine levels back up and energy.” he climbs into bed with her and lets her choose how she wants him to lay. “thank you,” she whispers.

#kendall and elias

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lastbluetardis · 1 year ago

Text

Sacred New Beginnings (20/?)

Summary: James Noble thought he traded away his chance at love and a happy-ever-after when he signed a contract with a record label that turned him into an international celebrity. But a chance meeting in a dive bar may prove him wrong. Ten x Rose AU This Chapter: Teen, ~5600 words AO3 || Ch1 | Ch2 | Ch3 | Ch4 | Ch5 | Ch6 | Ch7 | Ch8 | Ch9 | Ch10 | Ch11 | Ch12 | Ch13 | Ch14 | Ch15 | Ch16 | Ch17 | Ch18 | Ch19 |

All hell breaks loose in the hallway: cameras flash, voices shout, and Rose is frozen at the door. James springs into action at once, flying to her side and swallowing the sudden nausea that threatens to buckle his knees.

How did they find him? How do they know where Rose lives? How do they know her name?

“Get back. Get inside,” he says woodenly, grabbing Rose’s arm and pulling her away from the cameras that are snapping dozens and dozens of photos. There’s a delivery person standing at the threshold, holding a travel tray of drinks and a bag of food. James takes them from him. “Thanks, mate.”

He utterly ignores the paparazzi, who are shouting his name and hers while asking all sorts of questions, and instead slams the door behind him.

Fucking hell. This is it; his worst nightmare is coming true. He’s been found, and Rose has been found, and now the entire world will know her name and her face and where she lives.

“How did they find me?” she whispers, her voice brittle.

She’s pale as a sheet, white as a ghost—or maybe he’s got that backwards?—and she’s clutching at the front of her robe, as though people are still trying to sneak a photo of her in such a state of undress. Righteous fury rises up in him, and he has half a mind to go out into the hallway and roar at the parasites who thought it proper behavior to snag a cheeky photo of himself and Rose during their private hours together. He wants to rage at them that they ought to be ashamed of themselves for any pictures they got of Rose in her dressing gown.

He drops the breakfast he no longer wants onto the kitchen island and stalks back to the bedroom for his phone. The sheets and pillows are rumpled from their morning activities, a mockery of the peace that’s been shattered to oblivion.

The moment he turns off the “do not disturb” setting on his phone, it blows up in his hand. All the notifications he’d seen and ignored from an hour earlier are from Donna, who tried to warn him about the circus in the corridor. Twitter and Instagram banners are warring with each other for the top spot as the newest notification, and he’s getting dozens of texts amidst the series of missed calls from his team.

He slumps down onto the mattress and rings Donna, but he’s vibrating with so much tension and energy that he springs to his feet a moment later and begins pacing.

His cousin answers within seconds. “You’re in a steaming, heaping pile of shit!”

“What happened?” he demands, voice cracking. “What the fuck happened?”

“I don’t know. Something must have happened in the middle of the night. We’re working on putting the pieces together. When I woke up this morning, I found all sorts of rumors and speculations that mentioned Rose by name.”

“They’re outside her fucking flat!” he snarls. “A whole fucking swarm of them!”

“I know,” Donna grits out. “New photos are emerging. Jesus Christ… in your bloody pants?!”

“I didn’t realize we were opening the door to the fucking wolves,” he seethes. “We just wanted to order breakfast. Rose opened the door. She opened the door in her dressing gown and everyone saw her like that and they took pictures and called her by name and… Fuck, Donna. What am I supposed to do?”

His legs give out, and he pulls on his hair until it hurts. It’s just like before, when he had awoken to an empty bed and a whirlwind of notifications that nude photographs of him had been leaked and gone viral across the internet. But it’s so much worse now because it’s Rose, the person who has become his best friend, the one good thing in his life, the person who deserves the absolute best from this world.

“I’m on my way to her flat right now.” Donna’s tone is painfully gentle, and it makes him want to snap at her. “So’s half your security team. How’s Rose? Is she all right? How’s she handling this?”

James is now painfully aware he left Rose all alone in the kitchen without saying anything at all to her. His chest hollows out and he’s desperate to be with her, to hold her close and apologize for everything that’s happening, to promise her he’ll fix this.

“Call me when you get here,” he says, then he ends the call and flies down the hall.

Rose is sitting on the couch, scrolling through her phone with her forehead in her hand. He aches for her, and he forces his anger to soften so he doesn’t make this worse for her.

She hears him approaching and glances up with an emotionless expression. Her voice is hollow when she says, “The game’s up. We’re everywhere.”

She hands her phone to him, and part of him doesn’t want to look, but he takes it anyway. It’s a Twitter page—she has a Twitter?—and it’s full of them. He grinds his teeth together when he sees her shocked face in the photos, dressed in nothing but a satiny pink dressing gown that barely disguises the fact she’s naked underneath. Then there’s him in his boxer-briefs and rumpled t-shirt, with mussed hair and swollen lips and a ring of red around his neck that makes it so painfully obvious they’d just had sex.

Fuck fuck fuck.

“Rose, I’m…” I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.

Her phone buzzes in his hand before he can start reading any of the articles that are popping up across the Twitter feed.

“Everyone’s calling me,” she murmurs, taking her phone back from him and declining the call. “Friends. Coworkers. My boss.”

“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” he croaks, sinking to a crouch in front of her. He covers her trembling hands with his and brings them to his lips to press kiss after kiss to her knuckles.

She nods absently but doesn’t say anything. The silence between them is stifling, so different from the lighthearted laughter of her bedroom that morning.

“Donna’s coming over, as is my security team. They’ll get rid of everyone outside.”

“What’s the point? They’ll just come back.”

Yes, they will. James doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t know how to fix this, but the one thing he can do is take care of Rose right now. He knows all too well the state of shock she’s in, and when he’d been in her shoes, all he’d wanted was for someone to tell him exactly what to do and exactly what to say.

“Why don’t you get a shower?” he suggests, rising to his feet and tugging at her hands.

She doesn’t resist but also doesn’t speak, and he ignores the panic in his gut that’s telling him that everything is ruined, that everything he built with Rose is crumbling to ash.

“A nice, hot shower,” he says, guiding her through her bedroom and into the bathroom. He even goes so far as to turn the water on for her, testing the temperature until it’s just shy of scalding, exactly how she likes it.

Rose is staring straight ahead at nothing in particular. He brushes his arm down her sleeve and asks, “Can I take your robe off?”

“Oh. Right. Yeah. Sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for,” he promises, unlacing the feeble knot Rose had hastily made.

Rose covers his hands, and for the first time, she meets his gaze head-on. “Neither do you.”

He merely shrugs, but Rose catches his hand and squeezes. “James. Look at me.” He doesn’t want to, but he does nevertheless. Her eyes are so gentle that it makes something twist deep in his chest. “This isn’t your fault. Okay? It’s not your fault.”

She then wraps her arms around him, and he melts into her. They cling to each other, not speaking, but simply being present together. He tucks his face into the side of her neck, breathing her in, and trying to quiet the fears screaming at him that it’s all over.

“I’m sorry,” he rasps. “I never wanted this to happen. Not like this.”

“I know.”

They stay in the embrace for several moments longer, listening to the pitter-patter of the water beating down on the floor of her shower.

James eventually leaves her to wash up in peace, and when she’s done, he showers too. He doesn’t have any of his own soap or shampoo here, so when he’s finished, he smells exactly like Rose. It’s comforting enough to soothe the raw nerve from the morning’s events.

He dresses in the same clothes as yesterday, wishing he had something else to change into, and when he joins Rose in the kitchen, he’s relieved to see her picking at a croissant. Well, it looks more like she’s shredding it, but he convinces himself she swallowed down a few bites.

She offers a weak smile that he tries to return.

“Has Donna called?” he asks, jutting his chin to his phone.

Rose shakes her head. “People keep knockin’ on the door. Haven’t even looked to see who it is.”

“Good. Don’t open the door yet. Not until Donna and my team get here.” He rubs his fingers into his eyes. “Have you read any of the articles yet?”

“Some,” she admits. “It’s all the same: you’ve been datin’ a nobody called Rose Tyler for the past few weeks.”

“You’re not a nobody!” he squawks.

She snorts humorlessly. “Better than bein’ called a whore.”

“Excuse me?” His tone is icy as rage sparks through him.

She shrugs. “Some people think I’m a hired escort for you while you’re in London. Seems an even split of opinions, honestly. There’s a poll goin’ viral on Twitter about it.” She scrolls through her phone. “Girlfriend is winning over escort, 55% to 45%.”

“I hate people,” he growls under his breath. But then he sobers and says, “Try not to read anything on the internet. I know it’s tempting, but please don’t. It won’t do you any favors. People can be quite nasty under the mask of anonymity. They’ll say whatever they want to sell the story that’ll make them the most money. Some of my fans can be brutal too, thinking they know what’s best for me. Please just… just try to stay off Twitter.”

“Everyone’s followin’ me now, too. Ten thousand new followers and climbing. Five hundred and more DMs. It’s made Twitter unusable. I haven’t even checked Instagram yet.”

“Fuck,” he groans, beating the heels of his hands into his brow. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” she reminds him.

“Yes it is,” he snaps. “If you were dating a normal bloke, nothing like this would ever happen to you. It’s because it’s me that your life is being thrown upside down and torn apart for everyone to scrutinize. I’m a disease, infecting everyone around you, and it finally got to you now, too.”

“Well, tough. If I wanted to date a normal bloke, I’d date a normal bloke. But I decided I want you, you numpty, and you’re not responsible for anyone else’s behavior other than your own, so stop blaming yourself for everything that’s happening.”

James wants to keep arguing, even though he doesn’t know why. He doesn’t want to fight with Rose, but this sympathy, this acceptance, this forgiveness… it’s almost too much to bear. It’s easier to lash out, to put the blame on himself, to infuriate everyone else around him until they, too, blame him.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” he instead mutters.

Her eyes flash with a hint of anger. Good. It’s time for the mask to fall away, time for her to stop seeing him as blameless.

But rather than condemn him as he expects, Rose says, “Don’t you dare accuse me of ignorance. I knew exactly what I was signing up for by being with you. And I won’t lie, it scares the hell out of me, but I decided ages ago that you’re worth it. So don’t treat me like a child who doesn’t know better, ‘cos I do.”

He snaps his mouth shut before he can say something incredibly stupid. And as though to save him from himself, his phone chimes from the kitchen island with the name Donna Noble printed in bright white letters.

“Are you here?” he asks without greeting.

“Obviously. We’ve got half your team here and the other half is at your house. We’ve got some police with us to help disperse the crowd. It’s a zoo out here.”

He can hear it: a cacophony of voices shouts indistinctly from the other end of the line, and he can hear several people barking at them to back up and clear some space.

“Should I come down…?”

“Don’t you dare,” she warns. “Stay exactly where you are. Who’s the landlord of the building, by the way? We should probably let them know of this fiasco.”

He sighs. “It’s Rose’s father. Well. Stepfather. Tyler Peters.”

Donna pauses for a beat, then says, “At least he’ll be easy to get ‘hold of. Right. Stay on the line with me ‘til we get upstairs.”

James listens to every chaotic second of Donna’s trek, from the shouts in the background to her telling people exactly where they can shove their cameras.

“Bloody hell, we can barely get through this corridor. Oi, move it! This is a fire hazard, this is! Back up back up back up back up, oi, hands to yourself!”

If he wasn’t so miserable, he might have laughed to hear his cousin yelling at everyone who came within two feet of her. Alas, he stays quiet and steps up to the door, ready to welcome her in.

“We’re here, knock knock knock.”

As she says the words, three hard bangs rattle the front door. He peeks behind his shoulder to make sure Rose is well out of sight before he cracks open the door. The moment he’s visible, the shouting grows louder and the paparazzi snag more photographs. A combination of some of his security team and police officers have forced them several meters away from the door, yet it’s still close enough for them to get some good shots.

Donna, River, and a junior agent named Adric steps into the flat before he slams the door shut again. Within moments, he’s being pulled into his cousin’s arms. He hugs her tight and rests his chin on her shoulder.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispers into his ear, giving him a squeeze.

He drops his arms from around her, prompting her to release him, and when he pivots towards Rose, he finds River perched on the couch next to her, speaking softly.

“The plan is to get you back to your house,” Donna says, shifting from concerned cousin to professional publicist in an instant. “Unless you wanted to go somewhere else?”

“I haven’t thought about it,” he says, “but I can’t leave Rose here.”

At the sound of her name, she locks eyes with him.

“You… you’re more than welcome to come home with me, but you don’t have to, if you’d prefer to be somewhere else. I don’t think you should stay here alone, but if that’s what you truly want, I can arrange for officers to stay here with you.”

She shakes her head. “No. I’m comin’ with you. I should… I’ll pack a bag.”

Rose stands and brushes past them to head down the hall, but he catches her hand and says, “Take your time. There’s no rush.”

With that, she heads to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her.

He sighs and scrubs his hands down his face. “This sucks.”

“Yeah, it does. Of all the ways I thought you’d be found out, this wasn’t it,” Donna admits.

“Did you figure out what happened?” he asks.

Donna hesitates for a moment, biting her lip.

“What? Tell me. I deserve to know who violated our privacy like this.”

“Please keep in mind that it was an accident,” she prefaces, but already he’s getting angry at this mystery person who leaked Rose’s identity to the whole world. “Apparently it was Rose’s mother.”

That stuns him enough that his anger is abruptly gone, replaced with confusion and a cloying emptiness in the pit of his stomach. He knew Jackie had despised his very essence, but he never would have thought she would’ve put her own daughter at risk…

“An accident?” he asks skeptically.

“A report went in to a magazine reporter in the middle of the night. Two girls who live here overheard Jackie Tyler say that her daughter was dating James Noble; she was quite upset about it, mind. I take it you didn’t make a good first impression?”

“Not the time, Donna,” he snaps.

She holds her hands up and lets that subject drop before she says, “The girls passed along the conversation as a tip. Early this morning, the magazine did some digging, trying to verify the information. That digging leaked to other tabloids, and it all snowballed ‘til everyone showed up here to find out for themselves.”

He groans and digs the heels of his hands into his eyes. “Great. Just fucking great. And what’s this about people thinking Rose is a hired escort?”

Donna rolls her eyes. “Elitist arseholes who don’t think she’s good enough for you since she’s not rich or famous.”

“Didn’t help they caught her in her dressing gown,” he mutters murderously.

Donna winces. “No, it didn’t. But this is fixable. The flurry of speculation will run its course over the weekend, and once it’s out of everyone’s system, you can start setting the record straight.”

“I don’t want to set the record straight, I want things to go back the way they were before!”

He’s well aware he’s whining like a child, but he can’t help it. It’s like if he just gets angry enough, things will go back to normal.

Never mind the fact that he’s tried that before, and it has never worked.

Rose emerges from her bedroom with a suitcase in her hand. She eyes them tentatively, as though catching on to the bitter mood that has settled over the kitchen, but says nothing. Instead, she sets her suitcase down and gathers up her laptop and a stack of papers and notebooks, which she shoves into a backpack.

“I’ve got to do some lesson planning,” she explains to nobody.

“Of course,” he says. “No problem.”

“Has there been any more news?” she asks, striving to keep her voice nonchalant.

“News?” he squeaks, then clears his throat to force his voice back to his normal register.

“About what happened? How it happened?” Rose peeks up at him through her lashes, gnawing on the corner of her thumb with such force he’s worried she’s about to rip her cuticle off.

He reaches out to thread his fingers through hers, tugging them away from her mouth as he lies, “No. Nothing yet.”

“Right. Good. Yeah.” She finishes packing up her school bag, then smooths her hand down her fuzzy blue cardigan. “Do I look all right? Is this okay?”

It’s only now that he realizes she applied a full face of makeup. The red of her lipstick makes her lips look more kissable than usual, and the arc of eyeliner makes her beautiful eyes utterly sparkle. His heart trips over its next beat.

“You’re perfect,” he promises, bending to kiss those ruby lips for a fraction of a heartbeat.

She smiles slightly into the kiss before she pulls back. “Don’t smudge it.”

“Yessir,” he says gravely, snapping off a silly salute.

She laughs, and for a moment, they both forget about the morning, and it’s just like any other day together. But then River approaches to usher them toward the door, and the illusion breaks.

As Rose shrugs into her coat, James excuses himself down the hall to her spare room-turned-library. He immediately goes to the shelf he remembers Rose saying housed her favorite books, and he picks two of them at random, then grabs two other random books from the bookcase she’d said held all the books she hasn’t read yet. He can’t give her peace, but he can try to give her the comfort that comes with losing oneself in a book.

Everyone’s waiting by the door, staring quizzically at him. Rose is the first to notice what he’s carrying, and her entire face softens.

“I… I thought maybe you’d want to do a bit of reading,” he blurts. “And I didn’t know if you’d like what I have on my bookshelves. So I thought… books.”

“Books,” she repeats quietly. Then she meets his eye and says, “I love books.”

He smiles, then draws in a deep breath. “Ready to face the wolves?”

“Awoo,” she halfheartedly replies.

James slips his free arm around her waist then nods to River to open the door. Several officers have created a barricade with their bodies, keeping the horde of reporters out of arm’s reach, but there’s nothing to be done about the cameras, which begin to click and flash the moment he and Rose emerge.

He bends down until his lips are at Rose’s ear and says, “Keep your eyes on the ground and keep walking. Don’t react. You’re doing brilliantly.”

She follows his instructions to the letter, keeping her head bowed while they slowly amble down the corridor and to the lifts, with the police officers and security agents creating a bubble of protection around himself and Rose.

The main foyer of the building is just as bad, and outside is even worse because now regular people have gathered by the hundreds to try to catch a glimpse of him and Rose. Everyone is shouting his name, and some are shouting hers, asking how they met, how she snagged him, how long they’ve been together. Some questions are less polite.

“Ignore them,” he whispers again, fuming at the sight of her crimson cheeks. “It’s okay. We’re almost to the car. We’ll be getting into the back seat. You first, behind the driver.”

He keeps his hand planted on her spine as they walk to the car, where the back doors are open for them.

“In you go. Slide all the way over. Take your time. No rush.”

Once Rose is settled into her seat, he climbs in beside her, mindful of the books he’s carrying. The din of fans and paparazzi lessens when the door shuts behind him, but the buzzing in his head is loud enough anyways.

It’s slow going for his driver to get some distance between the crowd, but after a few minutes, they speed for his house amidst the sparse morning traffic. James is disheartened to see another crowd of fans and reporters on his street, crowding around his driveway. More police officers and his security agents have formed a barricade, but it doesn’t help the screams and shouts of his name.

I need to get a new house. Somewhere secret. Somewhere easier to protect.

His heart sinks to see that his security team has set up an entire perimeter around his property to control the swarm of people wanting to stick their nose in his business. He led Rose out of one hell and into another.

A soft, warm hand slips across his, rubbing soothing lines along his knuckles. He clutches Rose’s hand as though it can anchor him to the present, keeping the swarm of darkness at bay.

Inch by inch, the driver pulls the car into his garage and closes the door behind them, giving him some privacy. They each get out of the car and step into the house, which feels cold and empty. He heads to the thermostat and cranks it up, wanting Rose to be as cozy as possible in his home, and sets her books onto his huge dining table.

“Right,” Donna says, breaking the brittle silence around them. “Not much else to do, is there? Let the story run its course. If you’re feeling cheeky, post a statement on social media, or a cute photo of the two of you. Or let the paparazzi shoot themselves in the foot; already your fans are getting hashtags trending, outraged on your behalf at the photos they took.”

Usually James is uplifted to hear about his fans being good people, but apathy is all he can manage. He’s been hollowed out, exhausted beyond mere physical fatigue.

“Thanks,” he says, pulling Donna in for another hug. “I think we want to lay low for a bit.”

He receives a nod of agreement from Rose.

“Fair enough. Oh, your mum’s on her way here. She heard about the news a few minutes ago and couldn’t get ‘hold of you, so she let me know.”

James frowns and stares at his phone, which he now realizes has been oddly silent for the duration of the car ride home. The screen stays black, no matter how many times he presses the power button. All the notifications blowing up the device must’ve drained the battery.

“Can I get you anything?” Donna asks. “Either of you? Rose? You doing okay?”

“I think so,” she answers. Rose glances at him, but he has nothing to offer her, so she returns her attention to Donna. “I think we’re okay here. We’ll just… I dunno… stay in.”

Donna casts her a sympathetic look, then she says to him, “Your security team is out in force, so are several local police officers. We think the crowd will die down a bit once they realize you’re being hermits for the weekend. But security will be vigilant. I trust you know better than to sneak off on your own anywhere?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know the drill.”

“One last piece of business,” Donna says. “As your publicist, I feel obligated to confirm the news that you and Rose are, in fact, dating. Is that all right? It’ll be as simple as that. No details, no photos, just an announcement.”

“Sure, fine, whatever,” he says, waving his hand at her. “You know best.”

“Damn right I do,” she says, but he can see the gentleness in her face that threatens to break the delicate grip he has on himself.

With one last comforting squeeze of his arm, Donna departs, leaving him and Rose alone. But are they really alone, when dozens upon dozens of his fans and paparazzi reporters are making a muffled commotion outside? Would it help if he goes outside and requests they leave him alone?

(He knows it won’t… he’s tried that before.)

So where does that leave him? He feels like he’s going to burst out of his skin. He’s radiating with so much tension that he’s not sure how he hasn’t detonated. Despite being the largest house he’s ever lived in, the space feels too small, too cramped, like there’s not enough air for him to breathe.

James begins to pace a frenetic circuit around his living room where he mindlessly picks things up and puts them down in a new location. Yes, redecorating, that’s exactly what he needs. He needs to move things, to do something, to put all his energy into not thinking about the sordid photos going viral and the gross accusations people are making about Rose and…

“Hey, slow down.”

Rose steps in front of him and takes the bookends—that admittedly shouldn’t be relocated off his bookcase—out of his hands and sets them on the coffee table. (Bookends don’t go on coffee tables, Rose, what are you thinking?)

“Talk to me,” she pleads.

“And say what, exactly? This whole morning has been a scene straight out of my fucking nightmares?”

“Yes, actually,” she says, and it surprises him enough that he pauses his agitated movements. “Stop trying to pretend everything’s okay, or that you’ll make it okay. ‘Cos it’s not okay. I’m not okay, and I don’t think you are either. But I want you to tell me that, rather than running from me.”

“I’m not running, I’m walking.” Rose pins him with a glare so fierce it steals the rest of his sarcasm straight from his tongue. He sighs and admits, “I’m not fun to be around when I get like this, so I’m trying really hard to be a half-way decent person at the moment.”

“I don’t want you to be a half-way decent person, I want you to be James.” She cradles his cheeks, forcing him to look down at her. “I want you to be my James.”

All the fight goes out of him and all the voices in his head shout on top of one another. He slumps, dipping his head until his forehead rests on hers, and it all spills out of him: how much he hates that this has happened, how much he loathes the paparazzi and some of his nosy fans, how much he wishes he’d been the one to answer her door, how scared he is that this will drive her away, how worried he is about her reputation, how angry he is at everyone who had a hand in outing them. Everything. Every nasty, gnarled thought, and when he finishes his tirade, he’s calmer. Whether that has to do with everything he’d said or the fact that Rose is rubbing his back and nuzzling her nose into his, he doesn’t know, and frankly he doesn’t care.

“There’s my James,” she says, pinching his waist playfully.

“Your James just… just… verbally shat all over you.”

Rose breaks into a giggle and muffles it by burying her face into his chest. He holds her tight and smiles secretly into her hair.

“Thank you,” he whispers. “And I know it’s not my fault, but I’m so sorry this happened.”

“I know. This certainly tops my ‘weirdest day of all times’ list.”

“Oh yeah? What used to hold the number one spot?”

She pulls back and gives him a cheeky grin. “The night a famous singer bought me a drink and asked me to dance.”

“Huh, kinda weird that happened to you twice now,” he teases.

She laughs aloud, and the sound is enough to loosen the knot of tension that continues to wrap around his chest. He ducks down to catch her lips in a sweet kiss.

They pull away after a few moments, and Rose rests her head on his chest, seemingly content to stand there with him. The silence is solemn, but not uncomfortable, and for a moment, James hopes that maybe this means they can come out of this mess unscathed and, more importantly, together.

“It was my mum,” Rose murmurs, the words so sudden that for a moment, James has no idea what she’s talking about.

But then he remembers his conversation with Donna, and swallows hard. “What?”

“My mum,” she repeats, not lifting her head from his chest. “She was so angry when she left last night, and she must’ve complained about it to Dad. And people overheard her. That’s how everyone found out.”

Rose sounds so miserable and dejected that he’s desperate to do anything to take that tone out of her voice.

“It was just a bit of bad luck,” he says, pulling back slightly to try to force her to look at him. She doesn’t; she keeps her eyes level with his chest. He places his fingers beneath her chin and nudges upward, and she finally meets his gaze. “It wasn’t your fault. And it wasn’t your mum’s fault. Those girls didn’t have to send a tip into the papers, but they did. So it wasn’t your fault.”

“But if I hadn’t introduced you to my mum like that…”

“Not. Your. Fault.” He interrupts her by resting his fingertips overtop her lips.

“Still feels like it,” she mumbles around the digits before moving his hand away from her mouth. “I haven’t been brave enough to talk to my mum yet, other than to tell her I’m safe. I dunno what to tell people. My boss is demanding a meeting with me first thing on Monday. And my friends want to know all the details. It’s exhausting. I dunno how you’ve done this for all these years. It’s been two hours, and I want to just… just…”

“Disappear?” he supplies, knowing exactly what she means.

She nods, and sighs.

“Want to know the secret? Distraction.” He darts his eyes around his living room, searching for anything that can get him and Rose out of their heads for a moment, and he lands on his television and gaming consoles. “Right. You and me. Mario Kart tournament.”

Rose pulls back, confusion written across her face. “…Mario Kart?”

“Mario Kart.” He flashes her a wink and clicks his tongue in a way that usually makes her laugh, but only pulls a half-smile from her.

“Sit,” he orders, half-guiding, half-pushing her to the sofa before he turns on his Wii console.

“Hey, you made fun of me for having a Wii,” she grumbles, but she’s smiling, so the words carry no bite.

“Excuse you, this is the next gen Wii,” he boasts, then he comes to sit down beside her with the controllers, which he pops into a steering-wheel-shaped attachment. “No changing the subject. Are you ready to get your arse handed to you in Mario Kart?”

He’s so relieved to see a broad, genuine smile steal across her face that he kisses her soundly. When she kisses him back with equal vigor, warmth blooms in his chest and his toes curl into the plush carpet.

She pulls back after many long seconds and grins devilishly at him. “Oh, you’re so on.”

#ficandchips #dwfic #doctor who #ten x rose #sacred new beginnings #ten x rose au #james x rose #romance #angst #hurt/comfort #my fic

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stardustshelb · 1 year ago

Text

"Strawberry" Part Six - The End

TW: Language and sexual content

Word count: 7,939

Chapter Sixteen

The worst part about the bachelorette trip, other than my inevitable goodbye to Josh, was the bachelorette trip in itself. And as horrible as that sounds coming from the maid of honor, it was the truth. This trip has been full of drama and part of me wondered if Riley regretted ever planning it. If it weren’t for meeting Josh, I’m sure I would have been miserable the entire time. Then again, none of the drama would have existed had I not met Josh in the first place. Maybe I was the problem all along. I couldn’t shake the thought of being the reason why this trip had been such a bummer. I rolled over to check the time on my phone. I could tell it was morning from the daylight entering through the sheer curtains, but I didn’t expect it to be already past 10:00 a.m. I couldn’t believe I slept in so late; I couldn’t believe nobody woke me up. At the same time, I had no idea what was even on the itinerary for today. Maybe I really was the root problem of this trip. I turned off DND to find zero missed notifications. Ouch.

I rolled out of bed and felt a slight headache forming. I wasn’t sure if it was due to the three glasses of wine or bawling my eyes out before bed. I glanced at myself in the full-length mirror beside the bed and noticed how swollen my eyes were. Yep, definitely from crying. I needed to get some cold water on my face ASAP. I made my way out of my room and across the hall to the bathroom.

When I walked out into the hallway, I noticed the house was eerily quiet. It almost felt like I was home alone. I walked into the living room hoping to find a warm body, but it was empty. I checked the dining room and the kitchen—both were a ghost town. I glanced out the window and felt my stomach drop. The rental car was gone. Was everyone hanging out without me?

“Hello?” I called out but didn’t get a response. In a panic, I made my way to Riley’s room and didn’t even knock before entering. I found her sitting on her bed with her headphones in her ears and she was staring down at her phone. She jumped when she realized I was standing in front of her.

“Shit!” She yelled as she took her airpods out.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” I said as I took a seat next to her on her bed.

“I’ve been on Twitter all morning,” Riley said.

“And?” I asked.

“I don’t think anyone knows who we are, but there is a lot of speculation about you specifically,” Riley said.

“Why’s that?” I asked.

“Well, did you realize that yours and Josh’s hands were touching?” Riley asked me while she held her phone out for me to see. As if I were seeing Abby’s TikTok for the first time, I was shocked that I had missed that detail. Our pinky fingers were touching as we sat on the living room floor. I don’t even remember our hands doing that. It must have been a subconscious need to want to feel connected to him.

“Shit,” I said.

“Have you heard from Josh this morning?” Riley asked.

“Not a word,” I said with a sigh.

“Well, I don’t care if I sound immature, but you can’t be the first one to text him,” Riley said.

“I won’t,” I said. “Hey, where the fuck is the rental car?” I asked when I realized why I came to her room in the first place.

“Abby got so upset that she booked a hotel for herself last night. I told her she was being ridiculous, but… Well… That’s Abby,” Riley said while shrugging her shoulders.

“I know I have been a shitty friend to you this weekend, but–” I started.

“Nope,” Riley said as she held her hand up to silence me. “I refuse to let Abby speak poorly of you, so I will hold you to the same rule. You’re both important to me and I refuse to listen when you guys try to talk shit about one other.”

“Ok fine,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“She will be back this afternoon. I tried to talk her out of leaving, but when I realized she had already made up her mind, I told her she could take the car,” Riley said.

“What about Maddie and Brooke?” I asked.

“As far as I know, they’re in the dark about what happened last night. I just told them that Abby needed to get away for a bit because there was a blow up, and they didn’t ask questions,” Riley said.

“Wow, really? They weren’t even the least bit curious?” I asked confusingly.

“Actually, Brooke said she was waiting for there to be a fist fight between you and Abby all weekend, so they weren’t surprised honestly,” Riley said with a laugh.

“I wanted to beat her ass so bad last night,” I said, forming a fist.

“You’ve literally never punched anyone,” Riley said, rolling her eyes.

“I’d gladly let her be the first,” I said while punching the palm of my hand.

“It’s the last day of our trip. Can we avoid conflict today? Pretty please?” Riley asked as she put her hands together like she was begging.

“I will be on my absolute best behavior,” I said as I took her hands in mine.

“Bestie, why are your eyes so swollen?” She asked as she rubbed her thumb below my eye.

“I cried myself to sleep because Josh left after the TikTok fiasco,” I said as my voice cracked.

“Why didn’t you come get me? I would have cuddled with you,” Riley said.

“I didn’t want to bother you. It sounds like you were busy coddling Abby anyways,” I said with a smirk.

“You should have. I didn’t get any sleep last night anyways. I definitely will be going to bed early tonight,” Riley said as she let out a yawn. “We have to be at the airport by 6:00 a.m. tomorrow.”

“Don’t remind me,” I said, throwing my body on the bed like I was a child throwing a tantrum.

“Yes, ma’am, so you better not stay up all night with you-know-who,” Riley said as she playfully poked my side.

“Well, I can always sleep on the plane,” I said as I stuck my tongue out at her.

We decided to spend the morning packing our suitcases and getting everything ready for a quick exit tomorrow morning when we’d have to walk out the door by 4:30 a.m. Abby made it back from her dramatic hotel getaway, but I had yet to see her come out of her room. I wouldn’t have cared if she spent the whole day isolated, but I knew we owed Riley a great last day of her bachelorette trip. I would play nice because I knew that after tomorrow, I wouldn’t have to see her again until Riley’s wedding at the end of next month. And then after that… never again. Despite moving away, Riley was still having her wedding in Oklahoma because all of her family still lived there. I was already looking forward to the days she’d be back home while we prepped and planned for her big day. School would be out by then and I could devote all of my time and energy to being her maid of honor. The one she deserved from the start.

“Are you ready?” I heard Riley ask when she popped into my room.

“Yep,” I said as I grabbed my phone off of the charger and my purse off of the bed. We planned to grab lunch together and then spend the day sightseeing. Riley said she wanted to ditch the itinerary and just be spontaneous. It was nice seeing her loosen up a bit. I checked my phone in the backseat of the car and frowned when I still had yet to receive a message from Josh.

Lunch, sightseeing, and straying from the beaten path was actually a nice change. Everyone, including Abby, was civil and seemed to have a nice time just going with the flow. I was glad we could give Riley a positive ending to what was a less than perfect weekend. Unfortunately, I was secretly spiraling on the inside. It was now almost 7:00 p.m. and I still hadn’t heard from Josh. While the day with the girls was fun and much-needed after our falling out, I spent more time trying not to think about him than I spent thinking about anything else. Against my better judgment, I opened my phone and composed a message: “Did you already decide to cut ties with me?” I stared at the text, hesitating if I should send it or not. I didn’t want to text him first, but I was driving myself insane wondering why he hadn’t reached out to me all day. Fuck him for making me feel this way. I started to feel anger towards him which was something I never would have expected. I cleared the message and decided it was best not to text him. If he wanted to, he would. I put my phone away and continued to watch the chick flick that Riley picked out for us to watch together. I listened for the girls’ laughter as a cue for me to laugh as well. I couldn’t focus on the movie because my mind was completely elsewhere.

Suddenly, I saw my phone light up out of the corner of my eye. I quickly grabbed it to see the name I had been waiting for all day.

Plagiarism: “I have been working and am finally free. I’d like to see you tonight.” I stared at his text wondering how to respond. I couldn’t help but to feel annoyed by the fact that he unexpectedly left me last night and then didn’t reach out all day. He knew how upset I was last night when he left. Then again, he didn’t owe me anything. I had a choice to make: Should I give in and let him come over even though I knew it was going to make it harder to say goodbye? Or should I sever ties early to protect myself? Truthfully, there was no right answer. I would be grieving him either way.

Me: “I’ll let you know when to head here.”

Plagiarism: “Counting down the seconds…”And just like that, every ounce of anger I had toward him vanished. I turned my attention back to the movie and silently prayed for the credits to start rolling.

For the last time, I waited patiently by the front door to sneak Josh in now that the girls had gone to bed. As I waited for him, I reminisced about our time together the last few days. I’m not sure I ever believed in fate but I was glad for whatever force of the universe brought us together on that plane. I was thankful for the limited time we had together and would cherish these memories forever. I had finally accepted (or at least I was pretending to accept) that our connection was just temporary. I heard him make his way up the steps and I opened the door to let him in. My heart practically jumped out of my chest now that he was next to me again. Without saying a word, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug. I inhaled his cologne and felt my lungs expand as I breathed him in. His arms rested around my lower back as we held each other in an embrace. It was as if we were starting our silent goodbye at that moment even though he had just arrived. I didn’t want to let go, nor did he.

“Let’s go to your room,” he whispered in my ear. I felt goosebumps all over my skin as I finally let go to follow him down the hallway. We entered my bedroom and before I could even lock it, Josh had me pinned against the back of the door. I gasped as his mouth met mine. It was as if he had some sort of animalistic hunger take over him. I moved my hand to lock the door before his mouth started to travel down my neck and to my chest. I felt his hands grip my ass as he pulled me closer to him. I pulled my shirt off and felt one of his hands move up my back to undo my bra. His mouth remained on my chest as he kissed and nipped my breasts. I ran my hands through his hair as he effortlessly pulled my pajama shorts down to where I was standing in front of him completely naked. He buried his face between my thighs and his tongue worked its magic. I felt his firm grip on the back of my thighs as his tongue swirled around my clit. I grabbed handfuls of his hair as my head slammed back against the bedroom door. I moaned his name as my body shuddered in his strong grasp. I felt my body tighten as I fought the urge to scream. I moaned even louder and I swear I felt his mouth switch to a smile while his face stayed between my thighs. My eyes rolled back and my entire body writhed until every cell in my body spasmed because of his tongue. He didn’t stop and I physically felt like I was no longer standing but that he was anchoring me down with his tight grip. I pulled his hair back to try to get him to free me from this intense pleasure, but he continued to suck my clit until I felt another release. “Joshua Michael,” I moaned with what I swore would be my final breath.

“My forbidden fruit,” I heard him say as he kissed the top of my entrance before standing up. I stayed there in a post-multi-orgasm haze, silently thanking the door for supporting me as I tried not to collapse. Before I knew what was happening, I felt his strong arms lifting my body up and my legs wrapped around his waist. I let out a gasp at the shock of his sudden movement. I looked down to see his large biceps holding me up. Josh carried me to the bed where he gently tossed me on top of the mattress. Biting my lip, I watched him start to undress. He kept his eyes trained on me as he slid the condom over himself. I waited in anticipation for him to make his way to the bed.

“Come here,” I whispered as I scooted closer to the edge of the bed. He grabbed both of my legs in his arms and pulled me to him in one swift movement. I gasped as he entered me all at once. He was anything but gentle as he allowed that same hunger from earlier to take over as he took me. He pounded me so hard I thought he was going to shatter my pelvis. I wanted to watch his biceps pulse as they held my legs up but I couldn’t keep my eyes from rolling back into my head.

“I’m going to miss this,” he said as he continued to thrust. I grabbed fistfulls of the sheets and pulled them over my face to hide my blushed cheeks.

“I want to see your face. I like to watch you as I fuck you,” he said. I removed the sheets and looked at him as I wrapped my legs around his body and pulled him closer into me which I didn’t think was possible. I arched my back and grinded on him as he rapidly entered in and out of me. I moved my hands up and gripped his biceps as I watched him throw his head back. I moaned his name and I felt him release as he came. Both of us gasped for air like we had been drowning when he collapsed on top of me. The smell of sex, his cologne, and sweat was in the air.

“Let’s get cleaned up,” he said as I felt him kiss the side of my head. I never wanted to leave this bed. But against my will, I got up to collect my clothes and made my way to the bathroom to wash him off of me.

“I can’t believe I have to set an alarm for 2 a.m.,” Josh said as he held his phone with the clock app open. I snuggled closer next to him and wished time would just stop.

“Are you up for pulling an all-nighter?” I asked as I kissed his arm.

“Of course,” he said as he put his phone on the nightstand. We laid there basking in the golden glow from the lamp. I looked up at him and his dark brown eyes were smiling at me, and for a moment, I thought I would get lost in them.

“What did you do today?” I asked.

“We are starting our tour soon, so today was just full of meetings. We had to create a rough draft of a set list and even filmed some promos. It was kind of exhausting and overwhelming honestly,” he said with a soft laugh.

“How long will you be touring?” I questioned.

“We’ll be on the road for six months,” he said.

“Holy shit,” I said. “Are you guys coming to Oklahoma on your tour?”

“Uhhh,” he said nervously. “We’ll only be in Oklahoma for the bourbon meeting next month.”

“Damn, I was hoping I’d be able to score front row tickets,” I said jokingly.

“You can have a front row spot at any or all the shows. You tell me which ones you want to go to and I’ll make it happen,” he said. I couldn’t tell if he was full of shit or not.

“I’ll be out of school for summer soon, so maybe I’ll take you up on that,” I said. My heart fluttered at the idea of not only seeing him again but also being able to watch him perform.

“Oh, you’re old news, now,” he said with a smirk.

“Huh?” I asked as my eyebrows furrowed.

“Nobody is talking about Sam and Danny’s TikTok performance anymore according to our social media team. They posted some cryptic promos online to get the platforms talking about our upcoming tour instead,” he said with a wink.

“Ah, man. I was hoping you’d be my claim to fame,” I said with a sigh.

“Sorry, your 15 seconds are over,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

“Will you let me know when you’re in Oklahoma next month?” I asked. I watched his eyes scan the room as if they were searching for an answer that seemed to elude him.

“Strawberry, I already told you that I don’t want to intrude on your personal life,” he said as if he were annoyed that I brought up the burning question again.

“You wouldn’t be,” I said. “You say I could have front row tickets to all of your shows but you don’t want to see me when you’re in my home state? It’s confusing.”

“It’s just—” he began.

“I’m leaving him when I get home,” I admitted for the first time. I was even surprised that I said my thoughts aloud.

“Strawberry…” he said with a sigh.

“No, it’s not because of you. Well, that’s not totally true. It is because of you. You have inspired me to stop living my life in a dormant state. I finally feel like I have something worth living for. I have a pulse, I have a mind, I have a heart, and I am free to use them however I see fit. It’s like you’ve awakened me in some way, Josh. And I know I sound crazy, but it’s true,” I said. I felt like I had just screamed the words off the pages of my figurative diary. I suddenly felt embarrassed by my bold confessions. Without saying a word, Josh tilted my chin up with his hand and I stared into his eyes.

“It’s important that you live your life the way you want without fear. I’m just happy to have been a small part of your new beginning,” he said as he gently kissed me. For the rest of the night and into the early morning of the new day, we held each other for hours, had deep conversations, and enjoyed the time left before his alarm went off. For the rest of my life, I would curse the sound of that alarm. I felt my soul split into two as I kissed him goodbye one last time.

Chapter Seventeen

I had only been gone for four nights, but I felt like I was stepping into unfamiliar territory when I got home. I had a little under six hours before Kenneth would be home from work which I was grateful for because I was trying to decide how and when to call off our engagement. I walked through my front door and was nearly tackled by Sassy. I missed my girl so much I wanted to cry as I got down on the floor to cuddle with her. I buried my face into her fur and wrapped my arms around her. I stayed with her on the floor until her zoomies wore off. I got up to drag my luggage to the bedroom where I could start to unpack. I unzipped the suitcase and started to throw my dirty clothes into the laundry basket. I didn’t get far into the task when my phone started to ring. I glanced at the screen and noticed Kenneth’s name.

“Hey,” I said as I balanced the phone between my ear and shoulder.

“Hey, are you home?” He asked.

“Yes, I just walked in,” I said.

“Did you have a good time?” He asked.

“Yeah for the most part,” I said as I continued to sort my laundry.

“Did you make any new friends?” He asked.

“Um, Maddie and Brooke seemed cool but that was about it,” I said.

“You didn’t hang out with anyone else?” He asked. Ok, he was definitely fishing for something.

“Uh, we met some people when we were out one night and they came over to play drinking games,” I said nonchalantly.

“People as in…?” He asked.

“Is there something you want to ask me, Kenneth?” I asked.

“We can talk about it when I get home. I’m going to leave the office early, so I’ll be home in a couple hours,” he said. I could sense he was angry. Maybe the tough conversation was going to come earlier than I planned for it to. Maybe I shouldn’t start unpacking in case I need to leave again.

“Ok, well, I’ll be here,” I said trying to sound calm as we hung up the phone. I could feel my anxiety start to get out of hand so I took a seat on the bed to focus on my breathing. Sassy nudged her face against my legs, and I was grateful to have my loyal companion back. I reached down to pet her as I continued to take calculated breaths. I knew that no matter what happened after Kenneth got home, I would always have Sassy by my side.

I was folding my now clean clothes from the dryer when I heard Kenneth’s truck pull up in our driveway. I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the impending interrogation. I was guilty. I knew that. But I had already served a sentence being trapped in this relationship and I was ready for liberation, no matter how painful it would be. I continued to fold my laundry when I saw him standing in the doorway to the laundry room.

“Hi,” I said in a quick breath.

“Hey,” he said. “Are you happy to be home?”

“Uh, kind of, yeah,” I said, continuing to fold my clothes.

He crossed his arms and said, “Yeah, I guess partying with rock stars isn’t as fun as life back in Oklahoma, huh?”

“Rock stars?” I asked.

“Cut the shit,” he said. “Our PR team recognized you immediately. I had that TikTok emailed to me four times in one day.”

“We met the band in Nashville and invited them over to hangout. It wasn’t a big deal,” I said.

“Oh, well, you and Josh looked pretty cozy,” Kenneth said. My heart strings pulled at the mere mention of his name.

“How come you didn’t tell me y’all were in business with Greta Van Fleet?” I asked not only trying to change the subject but also because I was genuinely curious.

“I’ve never concerned you with details about work. I wouldn’t have thought you knew who they were anyways. I guess I was wrong about that,” he said as he began to take off his dress shoes. He carried them off into the bedroom and I smoothed over the piles of folded clothes when I heard him charging back down the hallway.

“What the fuck is this?” Kenneth yelled as I looked at the small, white rectangle in his hands. And as if all of the oxygen in the room suddenly disappeared, I felt like I stopped breathing. I stared at the card from Josh from the bouquet of white roses he had sent to me the day after we met. The card I tucked away into my suitcase to keep Riley from knowing the delivered flowers weren’t for her. It must have fallen out when I was unpacking.

Kenneth read the card aloud as if I didn’t know what it already said, “Thinking of you, -J. Are you fucking kidding me? That’s it. We’re not partnering with them anymore. I’m pulling the plug on that deal tomorrow morning,” Kenneth said with a scoff.

“Why would you do that? They love your bourbon!” I exclaimed.

“I’m not going to be made into a damn fool,” he said as he stormed off to our bedroom. I stayed put in the laundry room trying to collect my thoughts. I wanted to call Josh but I knew now would be the literal worst time to do that. I followed him into the bedroom as I felt myself preparing for battle.

“Don’t ruin this business opportunity because of me, please,” I said.

“Thinking of you… Of YOU?” He stressed. “Why would a celebrity give a fuck about you?” He asked with a mocking laugh. I bit my tongue because I knew he was just trying to hurt my feelings. My silence angered him even more. “This explains why you fell off the face of the earth during your trip. You didn’t give a shit about me. You were too busy fucking a guy who wears rhinestones and glitter!” He yelled. I watched his eyes fall to my left hand. “Where’s your engagement ring?” I looked down at my hand and realized I never put it on today. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I did wear it or where I even put it.

“I’m not wearing any jewelry,” I said as I attempted to cover my tracks. “But we do need to talk.”

I spent the following weeks simply going through the motions. I returned back to work but lived my life in a complete daze. I was in autopilot mode and moved like a machine, constant and without breaks. I convinced Kenneth to keep the partnership with the band. It wasn’t easy to do but I was happy he finally agreed not to cancel. He says it was because he wouldn’t want to pay them since he’d be breaking the contract, but no matter the reason, I was grateful. If anything, it kept the small dream of Josh coming back to Oklahoma alive.

As far as our engagement went, those ties were severed. And honestly, it was the first step I needed to take toward my new life. I was a few weeks away from summer vacation, so I had been slowly packing up my things. Kenneth so kindly allowed me the grace of getting to stay in his home until I had time to look for someplace new. As if everything were back to normal, Kenneth and I continued to coexist except for the fact that Sassy and I now slept in the guest bedroom. We continued to live our lives as roommates but this time, we didn’t communicate at all. Unfortunately, the same went for Josh and I… I hadn’t heard from him since we said our heartbreaking goodbye in Nashville. No phone call. No text. Nothing. I knew it would be like this but I just didn’t think it would still hurt weeks later. I was back to my lonely life with only Riley’s FaceTime dates to keep me sane until summer. I didn’t really have a plan but I figured I would take everything day by day. I had enough in my savings account that I would be able to support myself on my own. And as much as I didn’t want to ask, I knew my parents would be willing to help if I needed anything. Riley said the same thing which floored me; she shouldn’t be worried about taking care of her grown ass best friend while she was busy planning a wedding in a different state. That was one thing I was grateful for: Riley had me stay busy with wedding planning since she was living 738 miles away from the venue. I finally felt as if I were being the maid of honor I should have been all along, but I was grateful for any task she gave me that kept me from thinking about him.

Chapter Eighteen

One month later

“We ain’t angry at you, love. You’re the greatest thing we’ve lost,” I sang along to my music as I packed a tote bag with my personal items. I had to be at the venue in 30 minutes for my hair and makeup appointment, but that was no big deal since my new apartment was less than 15 minutes away. Today was Riley’s big day and I was so excited to see everything we’ve been planning come to life. Kenneth agreed to watch Sassy at his house for the night since I wouldn’t be home from the wedding until after midnight. Although our relationship had been over for quite some time, we still remained civil which was best case scenario given the circumstances. Even if we didn’t originally end on the best terms once I told him the truth about Nashville, we had spent over a decade being a part of each other’s lives. We weren’t friends nor did we talk, but it was comforting to know that we weren’t enemies. Truth be told, Kenneth admitted he was unhappy in our relationship too. This separation was what we both needed.

I didn’t mind attending the wedding without a date; I knew I would be too busy making sure everything was perfect to entertain anyone all night anyways. I grabbed my maid of honor dress, a navy backless maxi dress with a plunging bodice, and hung it up in my backseat. I was so thankful Riley chose a dress that was not only stylish and sexy, but also one that I could wear again after today. I went back inside to grab my phone, wallet, keys, and tote bag. I got in my car and continued the song that had been on loop for the past month for my quick drive. “And we’ll all be here forever,” I sang loudly to an audience of none as I turned into the venue parking lot. The wedding was set to start in a couple hours. I was the last of the bridesmaids to get her hair and makeup done since Maddie, Brooke, and Abby actually had to travel to be here. I collected my things from my car and took a deep breath before I made my way to the bridal suite.

Standing next to Riley as she said her vows, I tried everything in my power to hold back tears. I felt so genuinely happy for her at this moment that I was overcome with emotions. She pledged her love and commitment to Mike who stared back at her with such adoration. I don’t think anyone in this room had a dry eye. I was honored to both witness and be a part of the most important person in my life’s happiest day. After their kiss, I handed her bridal bouquet back to her and cheered loudly as they made their way down the aisle. I looped arms with the best man and followed Riley and Mike down the aisle to head to the reception hall. As we passed by the hundreds of smiling guests clapping in their seats, I locked eyes with a face that caused me to stumble. Quickly, the best man grabbed my arm and caught me before I fell flat on my face. No way. There is absolutely no way. I felt my cheeks blush from the embarrassment as I regained my footing.

“Thank you,” I said to the best man who still kept a hold on me in case I took another spill. I looked back toward the guest who caused me to trip, but I didn’t see him. It was all in my head. I shook the nerves off and entered the reception area to mingle with the guests while Riley and Mike took photos. But first, I made my way to the bar. If I was going to get on the dancefloor later like Riley had commanded, I needed some liquid courage.

“One glass of chardonnay, please,” I said to the bartender. I figured I’d be the first guest to take advantage of the open bar. I watched the bartender grab a corkscrew to open the bottle of white wine when I smelled a familiar scent of cologne.

“Make that two glasses, please,” I heard his voice say.

“Yes, sir,” the bartender nodded to the person standing beside me. I felt like I was frozen and couldn’t move.

“I don’t think you’ve ever looked more stunning than you do right now,” I heard him whisper into my ear. I turned to see if my imagination was playing a trick on me; alas, there stood Josh in a perfectly tailored suit. I was speechless, afraid that I had fallen asleep in the makeup chair and would soon wake up from this dream.

“Thank you,” Josh said to the bartender as he grabbed both glasses of wine. He reached out for me to take the second glass but I still stood there as if I were paralyzed.

“What are you doing here?” I asked once I finally found my voice.

“Riley invited me, so I wanted to surprise you,” he said, flashing that heart-stopping smile of his.

“What? How did Riley even know how to get a hold of you?” I asked.

“She said she kept my number from when you sent it to her before I came over for the first time. Remember when she had to run my background check?” He said with a laugh.

“I can’t believe this,” I said, shaking my head. There was no way that this was really happening.

“Come on,” Josh said as he stuck out his arm for me to grab since both of his hands carried our glasses of wine. I looped my arm through his and allowed him to escort me to a table. He pulled my chair out for me and I sat as the millions of questions flooded my brain. He took the seat next to mine and grabbed his glass of wine.

“To Riley and…” He began but clearly forgot the groom’s name.

“Mike,” I said with a laugh as I touched his glass to mine.

“Yes, Mike, I knew that,” he said as he took a sip. Liar.

“How long have you been planning this?” I asked.

“Riley reached out to me two weeks ago, and since our bourbon meeting is on Monday, I decided to stay in Oklahoma for the weekend. I flew in this morning,” he said with a wink. “And you can’t get mad at me for not telling you that I was in town because Riley wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Well, this is going to be awkward when my date gets here,” I said. Josh stared at me with a look in his eyes like he had just seen a ghost. He cleared his throat and shifted in his seat.

“I’m kidding!” I finally said after watching him sweat a little.

“That wasn’t funny,” he said as he finished his glass of wine.

“How have you been?” I asked.

“I’ve been good, I’ve been good. We’ve just been preparing for the launch of our new partnership and also the tour. I’m actually excited to have this weekend off,” he said.

“Where are you staying while you’re here?” I asked.

“Wherever you are,” he said with a wink. I felt my skin getting warm.

“Bold of you to assume I’d let you stay with me,” I said while taking a sip of my wine.

“I’ll beg if I have to,” Josh said as he stood up. He grabbed his empty wine glass and leaned down to whisper in my ear before heading back to the bar. “You know you’ve had me on my knees before.” My jaw was practically on the floor.

When Riley and Mike made their grand entrance into the reception hall, she gave me a wink when she saw Josh and I sitting together. I subtly flipped her off which made her laugh before Mike pulled her into a kiss. I was sipping on my second glass of wine, so I knew I needed to take it easy since my maid of honor speech was coming up. After the stunt she pulled, I really wanted to add that Riley was a sneaky bitch into the speech I had prepared, but I decided against it.

“I love weddings,” Josh said with a sigh as he glanced around the room.

“Aren’t you against the idea of marriage?” I asked, raising my eyebrow.

“That’s a harsh way of putting it, but essentially, yes. That doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy weddings,” he said with a soft smile. “Weddings are a celebration of love and happiness. For some, it’s the best day of their lives. And to be a witness to that, it’s moving.”

“I know what you mean. Did you see me crying during Riley’s vows?” I asked, biting my lip.

“Strawberry, I watched you the entire time,” he said. I rolled my eyes and laughed at his ridiculous statement. “You don’t believe me?” He added.

“Why would you stare at a bridesmaid the whole time during a wedding ceremony?” I asked.

“Have you seen you in that dress?” Josh asked, giving me a wink and nudging my knee with his. He began to laugh and said, “I also saw you almost fall down the aisle once you realized I was there.”

“Yeah, thanks for that,” I said playfully, hitting his arm. He grabbed my hand before I pulled away and held it.

“It’s really good to see you again,” he said. “You look happier than ever.”

“Thank you, I am,” I said, giving him a genuine smile. I stared into his brown eyes that I swore held me captive.

After Riley and Mike’s exit, I headed back inside to grab my belongings from the bridal suite. It was the most magical evening full of laughter, love, and light. My maid of honor speech was a hit and I even got out on the dance floor more than once. Truth be told, I didn’t need the wine after all. I was running off the fumes of simply being around Riley and Josh, the two people who bring out the best in me.

“So…” Josh said, shuffling his feet. “Would you like to come back with me to my hotel?” I hesitated because I knew the pain and longing I felt after our last goodbye. I wasn’t sure I wanted to go through that again. Even now, the grief I felt because of our fleeting time together still hit me in waves. I honestly can’t even listen to Greta Van Fleet’s music because it was too painful hearing his voice.

“I would love to spend more time with you, but I don’t want to be hurt again,” I admitted.

“Conversation only, I promise,” Josh said, holding up his right hand as if he were taking an oath in court.

“Yeah, yeah, we all know how that goes,” I said, shifting my weight to my other foot. My heels were killing my feet and I wanted nothing more than to take them off.

“I will not put you in an uncomfortable situation. I’ll stay five feet apart from you in the room at all times. Six feet even. Hell, I’ll book the room across from mine and we can talk on the hotel phone if you don’t want to be around me,” he said.

“Oh, so you remember how to use a phone?” I asked as I felt my cheeks get hot with my bold comment. He sighed and looked down at the tile floor.

Without making eye contact, he said softly, “I’ve been hurting too, ya know?” I moved closer to him so that he would look into my eyes.

“Let me run back to my apartment to grab some things I need and to change out of these fucking shoes. Text me your hotel information, and I’ll be there,” I said looking into his eyes.

“Can you at least stay in that dress?” He asked while biting his lip.

Looking and feeling like an idiot wearing a formal gown with Chaco sandals, I entered the elevator in Josh’s hotel lobby. I had my overnight bag slung over my shoulder with comfortable pajamas stashed inside, but I decided to stay in my dress a little longer per his request. I hit the button and felt the butterflies in my stomach move as I made my way up to the highest floor. I found his room and knocked lightly on the door. He opened the door and I immediately crossed my arms when I saw that he had changed out of his suit.

“Ok, not fair that I was asked to stay in my formal attire, but you get to wear comfortable clothes,” I said, narrowing my eyes.

“You never asked me to stay in my suit,” he said. He looked down at my feet. “Your feet seem to be more comfortable, though.” I rolled my eyes and made my way into his hotel room. I placed my bag on the desk near the door and noticed a tray of chocolate covered strawberries and a bottle of wine on the table.

“Cute,” I said as I pointed to the tray.

“I was feeling nostalgic,” he said grinning.

I finally convinced Josh that he had seen me in my dress long enough, so I made my way into the bathroom to change into my pajamas. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen me completely naked on more than one occasion, but I still wanted to keep my guard up. I exited the bathroom and grabbed the tray of strawberries before climbing into his bed. He opened the bottle of wine and poured two glasses. He made his way over to join me.

“So will you fly back to Nashville after your meeting on Monday?” I asked as I accepted the glass he poured for me.

“Yes, that evening we will head back,” he said as he began to remove the plastic wrap off of the tray of strawberries.

“We?” I asked.

“Well, the guys are flying in Monday morning for a quick trip. I obviously got here early,” he said, biting into a chocolate covered strawberry.

“So, I actually have a funny story about the bourbon company,” I said as I took a sip of my wine.

“Oh, that you are engaged to the head of the company?” He asked as he raised his eyebrow.

“First, were. Past tense. Second, you knew?” I asked with my mouth agape.

“Yeah, that was a fun conversation between our PR teams. Another reason I never reached out to you, by the way,” he said as he finished his strawberry.

“Kenneth almost pulled the whole deal, but I convinced him to keep it,” I said nervously.

“It all made sense after you and Riley reacted so strangely when I pulled out the bottle,” he said laughing. “I guess we both had secrets.”

“Well, I don’t have any more secrets up my sleeve. And I don’t need to know about any of yours that have happened after me,” I said as I began searching the tray for the perfect strawberry. He grabbed my hand before I could pick the one that caught my eye.

“There hasn’t been anyone after you,” he said quietly as he held my hand. I looked up to meet his gaze as it burned through me. I looked down at our hands as they rested on top of the tray of strawberries. You can’t. You can’t do this again.

“I promise that I was going to call you when I came back to Oklahoma for the meeting. I had every intention to reach out to you before Riley invited me to her wedding,” he said softly. I still stared at our hands because I was afraid to look into his eyes again. He removed the glass of wine from my hand and placed it on the bedside table. He took both of my hands into his and moved his head to where he was in my line of vision.

“Our tour starts at the end of next month, and I have little to no free time between now and then, but I want to make you another promise,” he said. I closed my eyes as I braced myself for what he was about to say next. “Every moment that I have even half of a day to spare, I will be coming to you or flying you to me,” he said. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you since the first moment I saw you in the airport.” I laughed as I felt the tears forming behind my eyelids.

“And I know what hurt you’re talking about because I have felt it too. Every Goddamn day since I left your Airbnb,” he said with a crack in his voice. I opened my teary eyes to see that his eyes matched mine. “So, if you are up for some traveling this summer, I would love for you–” but before he could finish his sentence, I shut him up with a kiss. Our first kiss since we said goodbye in Nashville. He pushed the tray of strawberries to the floor and pulled me closer to him on the bed. His hands held my face as my tongue parted his lips and we breathed each other in. The electricity I felt the moment we touched for the first time on the plane was still between us. It never left, and it never would.

The End

#greta van fic #josh kiszka #josh kiskza fanfic #greta van fleet #joshua michael kiszka #greta van fleet smut #greta van smut #gvf series

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