#i got a hold of the undertale font nothing can stop me now

[teastarfall]

why do they call it little nightmares when i have big dreams about it

[cottoncandyreaper]

((I don't think I went through and did edits for this section...sorry in advanced 😂 second part of Undertale story))

He always claimed there was nothing left but I didn't believe him for one second! Settling at the bottom with the doors opening to darkness I stepped out without another thought so use to the sight but the slight whimpering from the elevator said not many people cared for the dark and stopped me in my advancement.

"Guys, I promise nothing is going to jump out and get you. I've done this so many times and it's always fine. Look, maybe this will help."

It didn't illuminate far but just enough as magic flooded my eyes and a simple bone appeared in my hand. It was probably the coolest glow stick around.

"Plus this thing can do damage too! So it's light and defense!"

One hit point of damage but they didn't need to know that part; Nicole stepped out first taking my empty hand and squeezed while waving the others out.

"Come on, the sooner we start walking the faster we get out of this place."

"Yeah, there's another elevator that takes us up and then out to hot land!"

Kloey had to tug Macie along linking hands and forming a human chain.

"F-fine...but make this a fast walk!"

Knowing that Macie was scared of something almost seemed like a useful weapon at school if she ever caused more issues and I was happy to use black mail if needed. With a slight pull we started on as I held the purple glowing bone out away from me lighting up the floor and some ahead of us; papers scattered everywhere and some trash but nothing to dramatic. I waved the bone around the sides showing off that there were just boxes and nothing more even in the direction of places I wanted to explore there wasn't much at all...one super big box but I couldn't open that even if I tried.

"Whats all in these boxes anyway Winny?"

Kloey spoke softly so not to startle anyone as we had mainly walked in the quiet.

"Parts, scraps of ther projects and unneeded tools. Alphys comes down here if she really needs something and knows it's been packed away but other then her most of these will probably go to waste."

"Why not give them to the humans?"

"Because we got these from a human. There's a big trash dump somewhere and that's where all of these were scavenged from."

"Oh...so humans were, dumping into the mountain for a long time."

"Yeah sadly."

She stopped there letting the silence join our company again for a bit more until we all screamed when Macie screamed so blood curdling I thought she was hurt.

"Something touched my leg! Oh my god something touched my leg!"

She ran around releasing her hold on Kloey to hide behind me grabbing my shoulders and shaking me.

"Kill it!"

"Macie stop!"

I hurt her elbowing into her ribs but it was the furthest issue from my mind as I turned and glared.

"Will you relax!? There is nothing here that can hurt you! It was probably just a piece of paper fluttering up from us walking and creating a breeze!"

"N-no!"

She was actually on the verge of tears shaking like a leaf when Kloey came around and held her.

"T-there were fingers! I f-felt at least two fingers brush my ankle!"

"There is literally no possible-"

"👇📫♒♏⚪◽📬📬📬"

((H-help...))

The girls screamed again but I panicked, wingdings, I knew them well given the fact that it was the only other language I knew and the only language Daddy and Uncle Papy knew besides English. He taught me that it was our family's language and I loved that I knew it. To the human hear it probably sounded like jumbled up backwards talking but to me it sounded like...home.

"🕈☟⚐ ✋💧 ❄☟☜☼☜?"

((Who is there?))

"Winny...w-what are you doing!? H-how do you know that it's staying!?"

Macie grabbed my arm shaking me but I yanked free as Nicole answered for me as I stepped away slowly towards the voice.

"You guys don't talk to her as much as I do or have...Winny's first language isn't English obviously since she's a monster kid. It's Wingdings."

"Wingdings?"

At least Kloey was calm as Nicole contiuned.

"Its just a language for her, her Dad and Uncle. From what she's told me no one else knows it."

No one else was suppose to know it so that's why hearing it here in the lab was just as terrifying. Did Daddy find out and come to cut us off and get hurt? But that...voice didn't sound like his. It was deeper and in pain or just so low on magic it hurt.

"👍✌☠ ✡⚐🕆 ✌☠💧🕈☜☼ 💣☜✍"

((Can you answer me?))

"✡📫✡☜💧"

((Y-yes))

I could feel coldness sliding up my back like a hand aiming for my neck as I released the bone letting it float further ahead illuminating close to the ground and finding someone I never knew, never saw even amongest the other monsters and I wondered if Daddy or Uncle Pap knew him. I thought they were also the only skeleton monsters around yet the ones laying on the floor on his back looking like he got ran over by a truck. His skull had cracks in it that seemed old so at least they weren't something to worry about. There were holes in his hands that layed limp on the ground scuffed up slightly from where he had fallen and dirt all over his clothes. He was a mess but he was alive who ever it was.

"✡📫✡⚐🕆 ✌☼☜📬📬📬☟🕆💣✌☠"

((Y-you are...human))

"☟✌☹☞ ☟🕆💣✌☠ 👌🕆❄ ✡☜💧📬 ✋💣 ☝⚐✋☠☝ ❄⚐ ☟☜☹🏱 ✡⚐🕆 ⚐😐✌✡✍"

((Half human but yes. I'm going to help you okay?))

He looked so weak and I think I saw just a bit of annoyance in his eye sockets as they looked me over but he was definitely not in a position to deny any help regardless.

"Winny..."

Nicole stepped closer laying her hand on my shoulder as she knelt down at my side.

"Sorry but, can you really help him?"

"Yeah I can...I have too. Sorry guys, tour is cut off early either way it seems."

I could hear Macie grumble as Kloey only nodded as I turned my attention back to the skeleton who's breaths came out as pained groans. Hovering my hands over his chest not knowing fully where he was actually hurt a soft green glow emitted slowly whisping around my skin and floated down into his shirt towards the bones hidden behind it.

"Whats that? Is that...your magic?"

Macie came towards me slowly probably wanting to be closer to the light it gave off yet still far enough from the unknown monster so it couldn't touch her.

"Its healing magic that Uncle Pap taught me. He's alot better at using it though so what ever I'm able to do can probably only be enough to make him more conscious."

His head rolled to look at me more directly from the corner of my eye as I looked up to Nicole with slight frown.

"I guess you should have stolen your mom's phone after all for this adventure."

"Yeah...but hey, at least we can all help carry him out if he can't walk."

I was glad Nicole was so nice and was a human that would prefer to befriend all the monsters then be scared or disgusted by them unlike some other people I knew.

"🏱🚩✌🏱🚩📬📬📬👎⚐ ✡⚐🕆 💣☜✌☠📪 🏱🚩✌🚩🏱✡☼🕆💧✍."

((Pap...do you mean Papyrus?))

I met his eye sockets with a small smile and nod.

"☟☜ ✋💧 💣✡ 🕆☠👍☹☜📬 👎⚐ ✡⚐🕆 😐☠⚐🕈 ☟✋💣✍"

((He is my uncle. Do you know him?))

His sockets widened noticeably enough as it seemed he was finally looking at me for real, his once fuzzy and unfocused eye lights steady.

"☟☜ ✋💧 💣✡ 💧⚐☠"

((He is my son))

"What?..."

I couldn't even answer back in wingdings feeling his words jump around my head with how for sure he just spoke them. Neither of them ever talked about their parents; I asked Daddy alot when I was younger if I had any grandparent's even and now that I thought on all the interacts he always seemed sad or confused. Like he tried to remember fully but he just...wasn't able too. And he seemed so quick to contiune adding on to the shock some more.

"Papyrus...and Sans...they are my sons...I haven't seen them for, a very long time I think."

"You think?"

He groaned getting the strength suddenly to move wanting to sit up as I stopped the magic and helped him to move till he could lean back against some boxes.

"You may not know much about healing magic...but it's stronger then you think..."

"So it's...helping?"

"Yes...thank you."

I was relieved that I was doing enough to help him and knew I could focus on the new information that still wasn't fully connecting.

"So you're their Dad...they never, talked about you..."

He hummed softly closing his sockets leaning his head back flexing his phalanges and moving his legs around like he was testing their function. Kloey, Nicole and Macie all sat around and behind me like backup incase something happened even if they couldn't do anything even if it did.

"What is your name?"

"Tell me yours and I'll share mine."

He chuckled some opening one eye that swirled with purple magic similar to my own.

"I don't even have to check your soul to know you are Sans daughter...he was always one to be suspicious of others on first meeting...my name is W.D. Gaster...and yours?"

"Winny Font...and these are my friends Nicole, Kloey and Macie."

"Friends?"

He scanned them over probably checking them, his eye lights lingered on Macie probably seeing the fact that was defiantly not the type of soul to befriend someone like me.

"Interesting."

[yesiamkiwi]

New fic: Fishbowl

Fandom: Undertale

Rating: T (rating may change)

Warnings: kidnapping, result of kidnapping. nothing violent yet

Papyrus leaps at the chance to help his father with important work, but when he arrives at his childhood house something he wasn't at all expecting is waiting for him. Torn between his morals and the want for a closer relationship with Gaster, Papyrus has to help the small mermaid living in his pool.

Chapter 1 under the cut

Also on ao3 (link in the notes)

Papyrus had never been very close with his dad. It wasn’t that he was cruel or neglectful, quite the opposite. He was well cared for, growing up in a large house with anything he could want. However, his father was very emotionally distant. Sure, if he had a problem he could go to his father, who would do his best to listen and provide feedback, but he always seemed slightly uncomfortable and out of touch with children. Which is fair, seeing as how Papyrus was an accident.

Gaster had always preferred to keep his distance from people. The one time he didn’t, he managed to get pregnant. The partner he had taken was a one time thing; his father hadn’t been interested in telling him. He carried the child to term and when Papyrus was born, he kept him still. He may not have wanted a child, but Papyrus was his. So he did love Papyrus, truly he did; parenting just didn’t come naturally to him.

Papyrus was quite lonely during his childhood, despite his father’s best efforts. He often bounced from extracurricular activity to extracurricular activity, hoping each one would bring him friends, but he had never fit in. Maybe it was his social skills. He always talked too loud, was always moving, was very blunt at times and clueless at others. Maybe it was just him, his personality. He always strove to be kind and helpful but perhaps he was too overbearing instead.

So in his adult years, when his father invited him back to his childhood home to consult on a project he was working on, he eagerly jumped on the chance. He had never been allowed into his lab as a child, too dangerous, apparently. He did know his father did very important work though. That’s why he was the Royal Scientist.

Pulling into the neatly paved driveway, Papyrus parked his red sports car, a gift from his father. He had no idea what to expect as he unlocked the front door. His father had never specified, simply stating that it was urgent.

Stepping into the foyer, he called out, receiving no reply. Moving to the intercom on the wall, he pressed the button and called again. There was no answer from the speaker, but his phone chimed with a text from his father, telling him to come out back.

The backyard was about an acre, with large trees lining the edges, perfect for climbing. There were gardens, properly maintained by the caretakers. He’d always slipped outside during nap time to watch them work, hoping to help. He was never allowed, but occasionally the gardeners took pity on him and let him sample some of the fresh veggies. The carrots were always his favorite.

Tucked into one corner of the yard was a large, above ground pool. His father was standing nearby, balancing on the ladder leading up to the water, frantically writing something down.

“Father!” Papyrus smiled, racing over to him. Gaster looked back at him, giving a small smile before turning back to his work.

“Ah, hello, son. How was the drive?”

Instead of answering, Papyrus gasped and raced over to him. His face and coat were scratched and torn. He didn't seem to be dusting anywhere, but the sight was still worrying. "What happened?!"

Again his father turned to him, a more mischievous smile on his cracked face.  “Come take a look. Be careful not to get too close, though.”

Papyrus scrambled up next to his father, the ladder slightly too thin for both of them. Standing a rung lower than his father he moved to heal him but was instead directed again to the pool. He gripped the side and hesitantly peeked over, his father’s reassuring hand on the collar of his shirt.

There, at the bottom of the pool, about four feet down, was a mermaid pressed against the side of the pool, glaring up at them.

The mermaid was the skeleton kind, their magic a stunning bright cyan, matching the surrounding water. Through the sun glinting off the surface of the pool it was hard to see, but their sockets seemed large and round, white pips of magic within pointed right at them.

“...Father,” Papyrus said breathlessly, “what….. where did you find them?”

Mermaids were extremely rare, so rare in fact, that many didn’t believe they still existed. Sightings were few and far, far in between. They were supposedly a hybrid between two to three types of monsters, one of whom being a special type of fish monster that no longer existed in modern days. And to see one in his old backyard was astounding.

“I found them in the shallows off the coasts of the Ebott Seas, a few hours from here,” he said with an excited gleam in his eye - the one he always got when he was close to a breakthrough.

“Wowie!” Papyrus beamed. “How did you convince them to come with you? And what about their family!? Group? Uh, school?”

“Oh, I didn’t,” his father said simply, turning back to peer into the waters distractedly. Papyrus’ expression dropped in dawning horror as he continued. “Their pod weren’t nearby, as far as I could tell. They were sunbathing on the shore, around the back of the island where no one would see them. Well,” he laughed, as if this were all normal, “no one but me. I was very lucky to be sailing nearby at the time.”

“Father… you can’t. You can’t just kidnap people!” he exclaimed incredulously.

“I haven’t kidnapped anyone!” Dr. Gaster turned to fix him with a disappointed look. “I’m simply keeping them here until I find a way to communicate, to explain what I’m trying to accomplish. I’m certain that once they know they’ll be willing to help me.” He sighed, leaning against the rim of the pool, staring down at the mermaid. “Unfortunately I cannot communicate with them.” he smiled ruefully. “I’ve tried hands, but they don’t seem to understand. I’m afraid they’re closer to fish than skeleton.”

His father’s font was hard to understand by anyone other than a skeleton. Not to say it was impossible, but it took a lot of time and effort. It was frustrating more often than not so Dr. Gaster simply used hands with those that needed. If the mermaid didn’t understand either, their language must be completely different than skeletons now.

“So, you’d like me to try and talk to them?” Papyrus was doubtful. “Maybe a fish monster would work better?” He climbed down the ladder, stretching his legs.

“Son,” Gaster quickly followed, grasping his shoulders firmly. “You’re the only one that can do this. You have to understand how important my work is. To study a mermaid’s SOUL could progress my research in leaps and bounds. This could help so many people, Papyrus. I’m afraid others wouldn’t understand. They’d put a stop to this before I can even begin.”

Papyrus was tense underneath his hands. This just wasn’t right but looking into his father’s eyes he saw the resolve and knew he believed in what he was saying. His father dedicated the past 45 years of his life to the study of the SOUL. His goal was to find a way to bring monsters back from falling, something believed to be impossible. He knew his father truly wanted to help people, he just wasn’t sure how holding a mermaid against their will would help.

As if sensing his doubt, his father let go of his shoulders to instead grip his hands. His face grew less wild and more pleading. This was honestly the most expressive Papyrus had ever seen the man. “I know this will help in so many ways,” Gaster continued. “I just need to communicate with them. Anytime I get close they try to drown me.”

Casting a glance back at the metal side of the pool, Papyrus sighed. He supposed if they could find a way to explain to the mermaid their intentions, and the mermaid agreed to stay, there would be no harm in it. However, if it was clear they couldn’t get through to them, or they didn’t want to stay here to help. Well. Papyrus loved his father dearly and wanted to please him but. This was another monster’s life.

“Okay.” Looking back at his father he nodded resolutely. “But you need to understand. If they don’t want to be here I can’t keep them. And…” he hesitated, not wanting to upset the man who raised and loved him all these years. “I couldn’t stand for you keeping them either.”

Gaster’s mouth twitched downward but he nodded, relaxing his grip and stepping out of his space. “I understand. Thank you. Now there are a few things I should warn you about."

Standing at the edge of the ladder once again, Papyrus stared nervously into the depths. The mermaid was still resting at the bottom. Their head had been resting in their arms but as soon as they noticed him at the surface they tensed back into a defensive stance. Papyrus shuddered at the sight of their bared fangs. Sure he had a set of his own, but this monster was clearly ready to use them.

His father had also warned him about their claws, much sharper than his own, hence the scratches on his father. Physical damage posed much more of a risk than the threat of drowning. Magical was still to be questioned though, as no one knew what their abilities still entailed. Anytime someone had supposedly gotten close to one they had simply swam away.

Skeletons, luckily, were a species of monster that didn’t need much air. All SOULs needed some sort of magical charge, which carried much more easily through air than water, but depending on the species, you could stay under for quite a while. Not to say it was impossible for a normal monster to live their entire life underwater, just that it wouldn’t be a very good one, even for a fish monster. Papyrus wondered if mermaids had evolved to live completely underwater and still function normally or if they still came to the surface for air.

It was times like these Papyrus was grateful he could heal so well. He took a calming breath and without further ado, he stepped over the rim of the pool and eased himself into the water.

[mr-beebleboose]

UNDERTALE FANFIC/NOVEL/THING

Adventurer by Name, Adventurer by Nature - Chapter 1

A/N: So this is basically an interpretation of the True Pacifist Route of Undertale, based on @therealjacksepticeye ’s playthrough of the game. The protagonist is my own character, not Frisk (no offence to them, I love the smol bean) but it follows the events of Jack’s playthrough and the dialogue is a word for word transcript from Jack’s videos. I started writing this about a year ago, if not longer, and I think it’s finally time to share it. If people like it, I’ll continue to upload it as I write it. This is just chapter 1, ending just before you enter the ruins, after your encounter with Flowey. In my word document, the characters’ dialogue is actually in the Undertale font but it doesn’t translate over to Tumblr so you’ll just have to imagine it’s in that awesome font. 

SPOILERS FOR THE WHOLE OF THE TRUE PACIFIST ROUTE OF THE GAME ‘UNDERTALE’ BY TOBY FOX. I DON’T OWN THE PLOT OR THE DIALOGUE IN BOLD OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS EXCEPT THE PROTAGONIST, KIT. I AM NOT MAKING ANY PROFIT FROM THIS.

They zipped up their jacket, laced their shoes and donned their backpack before grabbing the rope and harness.

Approaching the cliff edge, Kit Ross stared down into the deep, dark depths of Mount Ebott.

Legend has it that, hundreds of years ago, the village had been inhabited by a coven of witches and warlocks who had taken a drastic step in the monster vs human war, banishing the monsters underneath the mountain with a magic spell.

It was rarely taught in history classes, though, so it’s more like a myth. Either way, Kit was going to find out soon enough: they’d gotten bored and decided to go camping in the caves for a few nights.

They secured the rope around a boulder and clipped their harness to it. After a double check, they turned on their headlamp and climbed down into the abyss.

Wait, wasn’t it supposed to be getting darker the further they descended…? Yet, the cavern was strangely light at the bottom. Kit turned their head round to try and get a better look at whatever was emitting the mysterious glow: big mistake. In taking their eyes off the rock face before them, they failed to notice a particularly sharp, jagged rock that jutted out from the wall. It snagged on their rope and, before they knew it, snapped the rope and sent them plummeting to the rocky floor below.

Heart in their mouth, Kit squeezed their eyes shut and braced themselves for the painful impact of their body on the ground. Luckily for them, the rope had snapped just short of a dozen or so feet from the floor, meaning they landed with a heavy thud and a bump to the head, but otherwise relatively unscathed.

Sitting up and brushing off the dust from their clothes, Kit noticed that they had landed in a luminous bed of golden flowers. Odd; there was no one down here to tend for them.

Gingerly rubbing their head, they removed their abseiling gear and packed it into their bag. Walking for a bit, they inspected the nearby area (just rocks and darkness, nothing of interest) before stopping to pull out a water bottle from their bag. Just as they unzipped the rucksack, they heard a voice:

“Howdy!”

Instincts fuelled Kit and they turned, quickly withdrawing their pocket knife. Then it registered- they were stood in front of a yellow-petaled flower…with a face. That apparently just talked.

“…what the fu-”

“I’m Flowey! Flowey the Flower!” exclaimed the plant in a disgustingly sweet voice.

“I… I can see you’re a flower…”

‘How hard did I bang my head?’ they thought, holding the knife tightly.

“Hmm, you’re new to the underground, aren’t ya? Golly, you must be so confused!” cried the shrill voice with a shit-eating grin.

“Yeah, no kidding…” Kit mumbled. They kept the knife raised as they inched closer.

“Someone ought to tell you how things work around here!” Kit rolled their eyes, already sensing the craziness of the situation.

“I guess little old me will have to do! Ready?” Kit nodded hesitantly. “Here we go!”

Suddenly, the room went dark and two spotlights fell upon Kit and ‘Flowey’.

“See that heart?” asked the flower. Kit felt a heavy weight on their chest and looked down to see a red, heart-shaped pendant hanging from their neck on a gold chain. “That’s your soul; the very culmination of your being!”

Yeah, Kit was calling bullshit on this so hard. Nevertheless, they politely signalled for the yellow flower to continue.

“Your soul starts off weak, but can grow strong if you gain a lot of LV!”

Kit glanced down and noticed the pendant was surrounded by a mere layer of glass. They frowned.

“LV?”

“What’s LV stand for? Why, LOVE, of course!” the flower cried.

Kit resisted the urge to cringe.

“You want some love, don’t you?”

“Uhh…” Kit didn’t think so, anyway.

“Don’t worry, I’ll share some with you!” the flower winked and five…blobs appeared around it. Kit’s eyes widened in shock as they started to question life and their sanity.

They were dreaming, right? This couldn’t be real…they pinched themselves just to make sure, but nothing happened.

“Down here, love is shared through little white ‘friendliness pellets’.”

Okay, that definitely sounded fake; “friendliness pellets”? For a split second, Kit could have sworn that the flower’s face switched into a malicious grin, if only for a mere moment, but it could’ve just been a trick of the light. When they blinked, it was smiling, just as before.

“Are you ready? Move around! Get as many as you can!” Suddenly, the white ‘friendliness pellets’ were moving towards Kit.

Now, Kit didn’t make a deliberate move to grab them, but curiosity got the better of them and they didn’t move away from one headed for their arm.

They didn’t know what they expected to happen, but searing hot pain and an open, bleeding wound certainly wasn’t it.

They cried out and grabbed their arm before noticing the flower’s face: a terrifying evil grin.

“You idiot,” came the distorted voice. “In this world, it’s kill or BE killed.”

Kit sneered at the two-faced dick of a plant before them.

“Why would ANYONE pass up an opportunity like this?!” The face turned into a smug smile as the five orbs multiplied into hundreds and encircled Kit, leaving no gap for escape, except…

“DIE,” screeched the monster-plant, and the trap started to close in on Kit slowly. Unfortunately for ‘Flowey’, it wasn’t a very well thought out trap; the orbs hovered at Kit’s waist level, which just happened to be about 3 feet above the ground.

They brandished their knife and, in a very Indiana Jones style move, rolled forward under the bullets. They stabbed the blade through an exposed leaf, pinning it to the floor. The plant released a high-pitched shriek as the trap faded into nothingness.

“I don’t know what the fuck just happened or what the hell you are, but you leave me alone y’hear?!” Kit demanded angrily. ‘Flowey’ nodded (if plants can nod…) and tried to retreat underground again but was hindered by Kit’s knife.

They removed it mercifully, letting the flower go: they never were the one for killing. It quickly disappeared back into the soft earth with a squawk of fear, leaving the cave silent.

Kit sat back, staring at the bleeding wound on their arm. They put the pen-knife back in their bag and went to stand up when they came face to face with a purple fabric and a white insignia, surrounded by white fur. Shocked, they fell back and landed on their arm, inhaling sharply in shock and pain.

“What a terrible creature, torturing such a poor, innocent youth…” came a soft, warm voice from above them.

Kit scrambled back, getting to their feet and pulling their knife out again. They were certainly more scared now; there was no adrenaline, no fear or pain fuelling them now. This was a…a creature at least 3 times larger than Kit, not just some stupid plant. God knew the damage that could be done to them in this moment.

“D-Don’t come too close, I’m not afraid to use this!” they stammered unconvincingly, pen-knife trembling in their hand. This…being…was at least 6 foot tall, if not taller, and resembled some sort of bull or goat. It had small horns on its head and wore a purple…dress? Soft white fur encompassed its whole body, and although it didn’t appear threatening, Kit was extremely on edge.

“Ah, do not be afraid, my child,” said the being, kneeling down to match Kit’s height more, smiling a sincere smile. “I am Toriel, caretaker of the Ruins.” It gestured to the surrounding cave that was a lot less scary in the presence of this…woman? It appeared female, but who was Kit to judge someone’s gender…do animal-monsters even have genders? Either way, this being was no more threatening than a bumble bee bumping into a window on a hot, summer’s day.

“I pass through this place every day to see if anyone has fallen down,” she continued, standing up again. She had to be nearly 7 foot in height, towering over Kit’s tiny 5’6” frame.

“I came here to camp,” they explained, realising how dumb that sounded compared to the fact that the monsters from the legends actually exist. “I was abseiling down when my rope snapped and then I ran into that…thing,” they said, pointing at where the plant had appeared. “I didn’t…expect anyone to be down here,” they admitted, looking back up at the goat-woman-being.

“You are the first human to come here in a long time.”

“Makes sense,” nodded Kit. “No one believes in the myths and legends: they just think this is a normal mountain. When that kid fell down here and was never seen again, people started to avoid it like the plague. Now it…sort of makes sense.” Kit put the knife away in their pocket for easy access and hissed as their burnt arm flexed. As they looked down, they saw something odd – the heart pendant had a small crack in it and was glowing a little less brightly than it had been before. “Huh…guess that weed was right,” they mumbled, fingering it curiously. But…how could a simple necklace actually represent their soul? Kit hadn’t even been aware that souls existed until now.

Toriel gasped when she saw the wound, putting a gentle hand-thing on Kit’s uninjured shoulder. “Come! I will guide you through the catacombs,” she said, leading Kit to a purple archway that they hadn’t spotted before. It appeared to be made of marble, consisting of two huge pillars and a curved segment joining them at the top. Within the curved arch was a strange symbol that sort of looked like wings, in Kit’s eyes.

“This way.”

Kit grabbed their bag and shouldered it, Toriel leading the way further and further into the mountain…

[yanocon-blog]

Offcode - Chapter 1

**NOTE FROM THE CREATOR - I made this in Office, and there you can choose different fonts... Since that didn’t copy to here... here is a note: ANYTHING THAT IS WRITTEN LIKE THIS is actually written in Wingdings... Okay, now the story can begin...

“Aaand... there! Done!”

As the text editor in the laptop closed down, Yan laid back in his chair, stretching his arms and legs. After a extremely tirying hour, the college essay he needed to do was done and he could finally relax.

“Well, since now I don't have anything else to do, maybe I can finish it now...” - he thought to himself, while double-clicking the heart icon in the desktop. He was ready to face the final boss on yet another Undertale pacifist run. It was his third one, and he loved each one of them...

Yan was focused on the screen at that moment. He already had dinner and was back from the college about two hours ago. He studied at night, in a college near the exit of the city. It wasn't far away from his home, so he used to have dinner after 10PM. Yan lived with his parents, and didn't work, but was always trying to help everyone in every way he could. His dad worked at the city hall, and his mom was a music teacher. Yan himself was studying to become a teacher, and dreamed about one day having his own school.

The screen went white. The player defeated the final boss and destroyed the barrier once again.

That filled him with DETERMINATION...

Yan learned about Undertale a year ago, but he only got the game two months before. He was amazed that even after a year of spoilers, the game still managed to surprise him and make him laugh. Playing games on the computer wasn't on his list of “favorite things to do”. He preferred to play games on his console and on his phone, but Undertale changed that. Ever since he bought it, he went crazy about it and everything related to it. So he knew all about the different timelines and possibilities that the game offered. He told himself he'd NEVER do a genocide run, since he knew that doing that would corrupt his game, and he didn't want that.

All the characters were facing towards the sun. They were free.

“Ok, done. I should go sleep now, it's late...” - Yan said to himself. The player hold down the ESC key, ready to close the game and turn off the computer.

BUT IT REFUSED...

“Huh...? Why is it taking this long to close? Did it crash?”

The player tried again...

BUT IT REFUSED AGAIN...

“Ok, that's enough...”

The player hit CTRL+ALT+DEL, bringing the task manager up, and tried to force close the game...

But it failed...

As the player closed the task manager and attempted to hit the RESTART button, the screen suddenly turned white...

THIS NEXT EXPERIMENT

SEEMS

VERY

VERY

INTERESTING

...

A bright green light warped through the power cord of the computer and when it reached the power brick, it went through its blue LED, emitting a glaring flash for a few seconds.

When it faded, Yan almost screamed out loud (he held up because of the time). Laid down on the floor, unconciously, was...

sans...

“WHAT? Am I dreaming? It must be... this is just on my head... right? There's no way he is re... … al... ...”

He stopped when he looked at his computer screen. It was back to normal, but the game window was black and had something written on it...

WHAT DO YOU TWO THINK

“... no... it's true... sans is here...” - the thought terrified Yan. How could this even be possible?

Sans was still unconcious, so that gave time for the player to analyze him. For the most part, he was the same, but strangely his jacket wasn't blue as usual. Instead, it resembled the color of the glare that ran through the power cord. A light-green, almost as the leaves in a tree. It reminded Yan about the text in the old computers he usually sees in videos...

… the color of code …

“ugh... where am i...?” - said Sans with a lazy voice... He woke up...

At first, Sans was confused. It seems like he didn't know what happened. He looked to the sides, analyzing the room trying to identify it. He failed.

“um... Are you okay?” - the player asked.

“yeah... i am... thanks for aski...” - he stopped when he looked at Yan, in shock...

“HEEYY!!! who are you??? where are the others???” - Sans screamed, running away on his back, accidentally hitting the wall. He was panicking.

“Oh, right... My name is Yan, and you are in my room. So... I think your name is Sans, right?”

“how do you know my name? where are the others? what did you do to them?” - Sans was talking out loud and harsh. He looked mad.

“Let's just say that... I know a lot about you... and you know me too... well... not personally...” Yan was sweating... How would he explain to Sans that he lived in a world that didn't exist? And all of his friends were inside a computer? How would he react when he discovered that himself was not real?

“hey, you didn't answer my last question... i'll give you another chance... answer me or you'll regret it”

* Yan - the sweating intensifies

“... … um... … how can i put this in words... …”

* The player tried to think of something to say...

* He failed.

“that's it. bud, you're gonna have a b... ...” - Sans stopped. He started to sweat, his face was perplexed. - “... wh-what... what happened to... my... powers...? i can't use them...”

Sans looked at Yan... worried...

“wh-what have y-you... done to me? what are you?”

Yan felt his sins crawling on his back... It was the time to answer Sans... *Why do I have to do this now? Please, he still needs to believe me after that...* - the player thought to himself... - *Well, here goes nothing...*

“I haven't done anything to you... You appeared here suddenly... I don't know how this was even possible... You couldn't... You aren't supposed to... You shouldn't...”

“Y O U    S H O U L D N ' T    B E    R E A L . . .”

Sans took a step back, terrified. What did he mean with “You shouldn't be real”?

“You seem a little unsettled about what I said... Maybe you felt a chill run down your spine? Heh...” - The player was looking at Sans with a mischievous smile on his face...

Sans was unsettled. Did Yan make a joke with him? Or was it a threat? Either way, it wasn't the right moment.

Yan stopped.

“Sorry if I startled you, that wasn't the intention... I thought that since you like puns, you'd laugh... That would make this whole situation a little lighter...” - Yan said, with a sad smile in his face. He was being sincere.

“um... don't sweat about that, pal... i'm just trying to understand what's happening, i'm totally lost... how do you know i like puns? do we know each other?”

“Yeah, I know you... We've met before, but not face-to-face like that... Actually, we've met like that... but you may know me by another name... since, well... 'i am the legendary fartmaster', heh heh heh...” - Yan started to laugh... Sans halted...

“wait... did you just said my secret codework? no one knows about it, except....... …. the kid..... ….”

Sans stopped again... He started to understand what was happening. And he didn't like what he was thinking...

“are... are you... Frisk?”

“No... I'm not Frisk... and yet... at the same time... I am... As I said before... My name is Yan... I   A M   T H E   P L A Y E R . . .”

Yan was talking in a calm, serious and cold tone... Sans's thoughts started to become a reality...

“so it's you... the anomaly is you... you're the one responsible for the resets in the timeline...”

“Don't call me that, I'm not an anomaly... As i said, I am the player... Come on Sans, I know that you're a smart guy... You already understood...” - Sans flinched.

“I heard that code because you told it to me... I know about the lab behind your house in Snowdin because I went in there... I know about how you gave up on trying to go home because you said that in our dinner... And I know all that because I am the player... I bought it... I played it... Sans... It's hard for me to say that... but... YOU LIVE IN A GAME... YOU SHOULDN'T BE REAL BECAUSE YOU'RE PART OF A GAME... A GAME I PLAYED...”

Sans's expression was empty. He felt like someone had taken his SOUL and smashed it with a sledgehammer. Everything he knew, everyone he met and lived with, all of that... Nothing was real... That explained the resets, the fear of constantly going back in time... reliving those same 6 hours... It was just a few times, but that still hurts...

“... a... game...? so... everything i lived thus far... wasn't real? all of the people i know... toriel... undyne... alphys... asgore...” - Sans took a deep and depressing breath - “... my brother... me… all of us are nothing more than pieces in a game?”

“Technically yes... sorry, I didn't want to cause this on you... After all of that, you may think that I don't care about you or your friends... but... Observing your lifes really helped me understand myself... So... I want to help you.”

“why even bother... it's all just a game... it's not real... it doesn't matter...”

Yan couldn't believe on what he just heard... Sans was once again, giving up on going back to his home because, in his vision, it didn't matter...

“DON'T SAY THAT!!! Sans, you should never give up... Because there are a lot of people that really care about you... being real or not!!! And don't even try to argue with me!!! We will find out why you lost your powers and I will return you home! That's a promise!!!”

Sans looked into Yan's eyes... Those deep brown eyes staring at him, with a sparkle he would never forget about it... That was definitely the kid he knew and liked to prank with. The same kid that made his brother love the humans, the same one that saved the life of Undyne and helped Mettaton reach his dream viewer milestone, the same one that helped Alphys with his secret... the same one that destroyed the barrier and freed the monsters from the Underground...

Those sparkly eyes never ceased to amaze him... And even now, in front of the anomaly he was searching for, he still felt the same about it... That feeling was comforting...

“hey kid... you know how i am with promises... so don't even think about breaking this 'bone'... i... … i believe you...”

The player was happy. It is still a mystery what happened... But both Sans and Yan are willing to uncover this as soon as possible... but... it was late...

“WHOA, look at the time!!! It's too late!!! We should go sleep... Please Sans, stay here in my room until tomorrow... I think you shouldn't go far from me since... well... you are a skeleton... and everyone else here is a human...”

“don't sweat about that, bud... you're not going to get rid of me anytime soon... g'night...”

* You turned off the computer and the light, and laid down on your bed...

* The promise to help an old friend to go home...

* It filled you with DETERMINATION.

[mellohi404]

Arial

Hi guys! So, I'm writing an Undertale story called "Arial," and I'm hoping that you guys like it. It's also on Quotev. If you want, you can look me up. If you're really bored or something. Anyway, on to Chapter 1! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Burning. That is the last thing I felt before the world became dark. I was traversing Mt.Ebott, when I felt something burning my back. Before I could react, the world went black and I felt myself falling. Am I dead? It was still dark and I was still falling. “Oof!” I hit the ground and the impact was really hard. “What did I land on?” I pushed myself off of the ground and saw yellow flowers. “Flowers? I've never seen this species before. Is it indigenous to this area? But...Where am I?” I went into a sitting position and there was a flower with a face in front of me? “Howdy! I'm Flowey. Flowey the Flower.” Am I hallucinating? “You're not Frisk. Who are you, skeleton?” Skeleton? I looked at my hands, and they were just bone...Except for some burnt skin hanging off of it. “That's disgusting.” I grimaced before pulling the skin off of my hand. “Yeah. No doubt about it. Not only is there a talking flower, I became a skeleton. I'm hallucinating. Or I'm unconscious. One or the other.” “Hey! Listen to me!” I looked up at him and he had a creepy evil face instead of the gentle one from before. “My brain is messed up. Imagining something like that.” “You are different from Frisk! They listen to me! You’re just being rude! Stupid Skeleton! Who are you?!” “My name's Arial.” My parents were writers, and they thought it would be really funny to name me after a font. At least it sounds like an actual name. “Leave that poor skeleton alone.” A woman's voice said from my right. A fireball appeared and shot Flowey, making him fly away. “Young skeleton, are you alright? Did that flower hurt you at all?” I shook my head. “No ma'am.” “My name is Toriel. Would you like to come to my home?” Why would I want to do that? “I have a new set of clothes for you to wear.” I looked down and saw that my clothes were burnt to a crisp. “I really liked that jacket.” “Please follow me, young skeleton.” She started to walk away, so I followed behind her. If I'm just dreaming or hallucinating anyway, what does it matter if I follow her? She took me around the place, which she said was called the ruins, and went through a bunch of puzzles that were “too difficult for me”. I could have figured those out in my sleep! “I apologise for this my young skeleton, but I am going to leave you alone. Please go down this hall by yourself.” She ran away and I shrugged. How difficult does she think this is? I'm not an infant. I walked down the hall, and nothing happened. I was almost at the end when I saw her hiding behind a column. “I see you.” I said in a bored tone. She didn't do anything, so I sighed before walking ahead. She jumped in front of me from behind the pole. “Do not worry my young skeleton. I was behind that column the whole time.” I deadpanned AND facepalmed. “I had no idea.” I muttered sarcastically. “I'm afraid I must leave you. Stay here, alright?” I nodded and she ran away. “Yeah. I'm not staying here. This seems to have a Wizard of Oz feel to it, so might as well just try to go home.” I walked down several halls, meeting some frogs called Froggits and other creatures of a similar caliber. I eventually made it to a building that looked like a house. I opened the door and Toriel was there. “Oh, young skeleton. I have a surprise for you. This is your new home! I also have a cinnamon butterscotch pie for you.” I nodded and said thank you when in reality, I wanted to stick my tongue out in disgust. I’m not a fan of cinnamon or butterscotch. “Here. It’s a sweater for you.” She held out a blue and purple sweater and I put it on. “Feel free to explore, my young skeleton.” “I want to go home.” I said bluntly. “H-Home? But, this can be your home now. I can tell you all about my snail facts.” “Please.” She sighed. “Fine, Follow me young skeleton.” She went down a flight of stairs and I followed her. We went down a hall until we got to a door. “This door will take you to the rest of the underground. I’m going to destroy it, so that no one can enter and no one can leave.” “Hey, hold on! Please, I need to get home.” She turned around to face me with one hand in the air. “Then prove to me you can survive down there.” She said in a voice, almost void of emotion. The emotion that I could hear though, was regret. “Toriel, stop! I know you don’t want to do this, and neither do I. Just stop and let me through!” “I’m afraid I can’t do that.” I sighed internally at her determination. “Toriel! Stop! I don’t want to fight! I’m a pacifist! Just stop!” She put her fists down and sighed. “Are you sure you’ll be able to survive on your own?” She asked in a quiet voice. I nodded and smiled at her. “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me.” She walked up to me and gave me a hug. “Be safe, my young skeleton.” I nodded and hugged her back. We were there for about another minute before she let go. “Please...don’t come back once you leave.” I nodded and she ran away. Well, here I go.

[turnabouttoothbrush]

Sick.

Alright everyone, for those of you who missed the memo I have my college application in (for real y’all), my church-mandated therapy completed and the rebuttal to that GARBAGE psyche eval being sent in on Friday, and I got a job with an NPO which for now I’ll keep quiet about (since it technically isn’t a job so much as it is I’m volunteering in an unusually prominent capacity).

So yeah I actually have stuff going on in my life now. (I haven’t even mentioned yet that I got two callings in the Church. They’re gonna let me teach Relief Society! Me! And coordinate the YSA’s visiting teaching like I actually, like, know anyone in the YSA.)

Anyway. That, of course, doesn’t mean I should be neglecting my loyal(?) fans - as of late I’ve updated my ask blog recently and I’ve been uploading fanfiction at a fair clip, so now it’s your turn to be entertained by me, the great Airey, before The Hiatus™ begins.

By the way, can someone update the TVTropes page so I don’t have to do it? I think the last couple MSTs haven’t been taken into account there yet.

Today’s sporking that I’m totally not writing because I’m actually just procrastinating on writing a talk I have to give in sacrament meeting next Sunday is of some fic on AO3 that I found while I was going through the Undertail tag for stuff to put in the queue. It caught my eye because the dynamic between Sans and Papyrus (yeah, this is a fontcest fic, that’s why it’s here) is freakishly similar to the dynamic I’ve been using in some of my Liquidmantis fics. (Mostly this one.)

Of course I might just be seeing things. Fuckin wild, though, I’ll say that much.

Anyway, without further ado, Sick.

“I’M SO SORRY.”

Sans could only stare at his feet, slowly wriggling his toes against the fibres of the carpet to see if he could feel them. He could not.

“how long.”

“GOD, I’M SO, SO SORRY.”

The fact that the fic actually uses the allcaps/no caps “speech” patterns makes it all the funnier.

Man, wouldn’t it be great if you could change fonts on AO3. I’d put all my fics in Comic Sans just to punish people for reading them.

Sans tried to focus his swimming vision. Even sat down, it felt as if his legs were going to give and he would collapse forward. Papyrus was on the other side of the couch, bouncing his leg and wishing he weren’t to stupid, so ignorant as to think opening his mouth was a good idea.

Papyrus leaned forward to pacify Sans, who was stunned, locked in place, and winced when Sans leaned away.

“how long, papyrus,” he choked.

Papyrus was frantic. A barrier had been removed and like it or not, it was all coming out.

Side note: the archive warnings for this fic are Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings and Rape/Non-Con.

He clamped his hands to his mouth, but couldn’t stop the torrent.  

“I-- A WHILE. I DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO-- I DIDN’T MEAN-- IT’S SICK, I KNOW--”

“how long’s ‘a while’.”

Papyrus snapped his gaze away.

“GOD, IT COULD HAVE BEEN ANYONE. IT COULD HAVE BEEN ANYONE. WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE YOU?”

Sans didn’t have an easy answer for him.

He didn’t even know where to begin.

“I-- I CAN’T STOP IMAGINING US TOGETHER, AND IT EATS ME UP INSIDE, I CAN’T CONCENTRATE, I CAN’T DO ANYTHING, I HATE MYSELF FOR THINKING--”

“don’t.”

Papyrus was almost bellowing in panic, arms swinging, spittle flying from his mouth as everything he had ever known crumbled around him.

“DON’T WHAT?”

“don’t-- don’t say things like that.

it ain’t right.”

“WELL, I’M SORRY TO BE THE BEARER OF BAD NEWS, BUT THIS SITUATION ISN’T RIGHT! AND I’VE GONE AND RUINED EVERYTHING--!”

“you haven’t.”

Papyrus threw his arms up in exasperation, a frenzied ball of movement. Sans sat there.

“WELL, WHAT WOULD YOU CALL THIS, THEN? IT’S NOT AS IF I COULD POSSIBLY EXPECT YOU TO RETURN MY FEELINGS, IN FACT, IT WOULD BE WRONG IF YOU DID--!”

Sans spoke without thinking, anything to make him feel better.

“what if i did, huh?”

Unfortunately the author is determined to make us uncomfortable.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Papyrus froze, until they were staring at each other. Sans wanted to vomit.  

“PLEASE DON’T BE CRUEL. THIS ISN’T THE TIME FOR JOKES.”

What the hell was he doing.

“it ain’t.”

Astonished, Papyrus leaned forward, tempering his urge to pull him into a crushing hug.

And making the POV inconsistent.

“Y-YOU WANT TO--?”

“yeah.”

Papyrus gave in, throwing himself around Sans.

“I COULD CRY!”

“i know how you feel,” he murmured, an idiot.

I’m sure anyone even passingly familiar with the Undertale fandom has come across blogs whose sole purpose is unending, vitriolic tirades against both fontcest and fontcest shippers. They’re everywhere.

Look, guys. Here’s my official So, What Colour Is Your Toothbrush?-endorsed opinion on fontcest:

And here’s my official opinion on people who run blogs like that:

I MEAN SERIOUSLY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHO ACTUALLY GIVES A FUCK

It was a matter of slowly working their way through the dating rulebook. And at the start, it was if nothing had changed. Had the conversation been ignored, their dynamic was the same, except pepper with more glances from Papyrus, and more awkward silences on Sans’ end.

“WEARING CLOTHING, I SEE.”

“yup.”

It’s a shit ship, so block the tag and move on with your life.

It might be incest, but it’s also fuckin’ pixelated video game skeletons. Who cares. I know I selected this fic for sporking solely because *Grunts* Bad Ship, but hey, fucked up is fucked up. I’m not targeting any shippers over this.

And then it grew closer. Papyrus stood a little nearer, when they were on duty. Sans gave him the occasional chaste peck on the head. And, after Sans had checked and checked again that nobody would see, he let Papyrus hold his clammy palms under the sentry desk. Until, finally, Papyrus tapped Sans on the shoulder when they were at home relaxing in his bedroom as the racecar bed had even springs that wouldn’t dig in when he got comfy, and cleared his throat.

“I WAS THINKING, WE COULD… BECOME CLOSER.”

Anyway that might have been a little off-topic. But quite frankly this fic is rather well-written and it really is only here because it’s (intentionally!) got a totally screwed-up dynamic and oh yeah it’s the Confirmed™ worst ship associated with this long-suffering game.

But it’s mostly the worst ship because why do y’all skeletonfuckers have to do this to me :( :( :(

And I want no part in the anti-fontcest children’s parade.

Sans looked up from his book.

“you wanna cuddle?”

And Sans knew that look anywhere. He had shot it to enough people in passing.

“IN… A MANNER OF SPEAKING.”

I will not make a bone pun.

I will not make a bone pun.

I will not make a bone pun.

Sans felt his chest tighten, as if in a vice.

“oh, you wanna… i… kinda assumed you weren’t really into--?”

Boning-

THIS JOKE IS SO OBVIOUS AND EXPECTED THAT I CAN’T HONESTLY CALL IT HUMERUS!

“IT’S NOT THAT. IT’S JUST... HARD TO TALK ABOUT. PRIVATE. YOU’RE MY BROTHER, AFTER ALL.”

The statement hung in the air, and Papyrus quelled the little flame of self loathing that came with it,

Gotta admit, I have a bone to pick with how the author keeps randomly switching POV!

because it didn’t matter anymore. He could be honest. Sans could only stare back, distant. Gone.

“BUT NOW THAT THINGS ARE AS THEY SHOULD, I FELT AS IF I SHOULD BE TRUTHFUL. AND TELL YOU THAT I-- I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT REALLY--”

The vice tightened still. It felt as if leeches were wriggling in his ribs, cold and lurid and fit to pop.

Terrible skeleton puns aside, that’s a great line but they’re fucking skeletons man, what do they have to do with leeches.

“oh.”

“BUT I WOULD REALLY, REALLY LIKE TO--”

Dammit. That settled it then. Damn it, damn it, damn it. Fuck.

Papyrus was so naive regarding sex that Sans could fob him off with anything. Great. Good to see that smaller failure was aiding this massive, hideous failure.

I told you we’d be making jokes about that for the rest of the lifespan of this blog.

Cunt was probably a good call for this, even if it wasn’t his usual choice. Probably feel better for Pap.

At the slight nod of resignation that Papyrus misunderstood as playing coy he rested his hands behind his skull and let his cock materialize.

There it was. Huh. How awful.

Wanting it to be over and to return to his book, Sans moved his joggers aside, lowering himself on Papyrus’ cock but finding he was bone dry. Heh.

Too bad I already made the “humerus” joke.

Sans grit his teeth, willing himself to become wetter, before slowly pushing down again. Papyrus’ hands pulled at the bedsheets, twisting them until they almost split.

“OH WOW, THAT’S-- THAT’S KIND OF SORE--”

Papyrus stuck two digits in his mouth, coating them in saliva, before briefly pulling out of Sans to finger him. Too hard. Too clumsy. Scraping.

Is it bad that I’m kind of enjoying having an awful-sounding sex scene here that actually knows it’s awful?

Insides slicked, Papyrus moved to try again.

“thanks,” Sans croaked.

“DON’T MENTION IT,” Papyrus soothed, “EVERYONE NEEDS HELP SOMETIMES.”

Yeah, help with that

BIG

FAT

B O N E

Slowly he pushed until he had sunk in entirely, before holding himself still for Sans’ sake. His head was thrown back, breaths shallow and quick, eyes locked open. All he could do was pant and try to process the feeling coursing through him, pulsing from his pelvis to the ends of him, and back. Like he was feeling the low hum of electricity.

Sans scrunched his eyes shut, trying to accommodate his brother’s cock,

SHAKE THAT BONE

SHAKE THAT B̷̝̙̹͕͍̣̰O̡̻͖̮N͍̥͍̥E̴̺̗

and above that, trying not to retch. Something foreign had wormed its way into him, and all he had to do was bounce on it until Papyrus came.

… The full realisation of what Sans was doing cut through his fog, and he looked to where they were joined, Papyrus hissing through his teeth as tears trickled down his face.

God almighty. There was nothing lower.

Except maybe writing this.

Or redistributing said writing packaged with lame jokes and references.

In an effort to distract himself, Sans parted his legs a little, before laboriously rising up to sink Papyrus’ cock--

He was going to gag.

-- Back in, feeling it pulse and twitch as he writhed underneath him.

“OH MY GOD, SANS,” he squealed, “SANS, SANS, SANS, GOD, IT’S--”

Down. Up. Clench once or twice for effect, to help Papyrus along. Sans was always good at that. Making Papyrus happy.

I mean... that’s one way of putting it.

Papyrus, in response, looked at Sans dead on, like a corpse looking back at him from a slab.

Sexy.

>A-Airey haven’t you written necrophilia before-

NOT FUCKING YET I HAVEN’T

GHOSTS DON’T COUNT

(SPOILERS FROM THE MOTHERFUCKING FUTURE: I have.)

At the sight his arousal heightened

Then again I guess corpses are by default sexier than skeletons.

and his back arched, pelvis nearly lifting Sans’ knees off the bed entirely, distracting him from his duties. He was yelping with every movement, years of suppressed arousal finally being expressed, and with the man he loved.

Sans looked down at him with pity. Love, revulsion, and pity. Whatever had gone wrong had gone spectacularly wrong,

Well it certainly is a spectacle of some sort.

for both of them, something far beyond the little flaws they had. This was not ‘sleeping all day’. This was not ‘neuroticism’. This was not ‘nagging’. This was sick. A massive, gaping chasm across their egos, and this was the easy fill. This, of all things, was the easy route.

Wearily, Sans sunk himself down and Papyrus scrabbled his legs, panting like a rabid dog.

*pumps shotgun*

He yelped.

“YOU FEEL SO GOOD-- IS-- IS THIS ALWAYS LIKE THIS--?”

“yeah. sex is supposed to be fun.” “I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I’M HAVING AN ABSOLUTE BLAST. A PARTY IN MY GROIN, BUT NOBODY IS INVITED EXCEPT FOR YOU.”

Sans actually chuckled at the very Papyrus turn-of-phrase, and that was the kindling that set his guilt alight. What were they doing?

“please-- please don’t talk while i do this.”

Papyrus looked hurt.

“-- it’s distracting,” he said.

Grinding forward and back, letting him really feel the soft insides of his cunt.

Brothers didn’t do this.

I’ve got 4,380 words in front of me that apparently beg to differ.

Sans wondered if he could tap into the little tidbits he knew of Papyrus, that came effortlessly with years of cohabiting, or if that would make this act even more of an abomination than it already was. Still, it was worth a try. If it worked, it would be over far sooner, and Sans could blister his bones

...h-how??

clean in the shower and not think for a while. Better this than have his thoughts bubble into blains of resentment, and that could not ever be allowed to happen. This was a burden he was taking on to make his brother happy. His innocent, sweet brother, that couldn’t be tarnished by a lover that might wish him harm. Take advantage of him. Sully him. His strong, fragile brother.

Oop, this took a hard turn into yandere territory, didn’t it.

Sans was always good at keeping him company when nobody else would. And if he couldn’t do it now, what was he good at?

If Sans didn’t have Papyrus, what else did he have?

“you’re real big, y’know.”

Papyrus glanced up at him, not understanding, and Sans calmed his shaking breaths, his juddering hands.

“your dick. it‘s real big.”

Papyrus felt a huge jolt of arousal, scrunching his face

HOW

in response to the spike in this delightful new feeling.

“WH--”

“real thick, too.”

I’ve noticed that on AO3, any time someone gets complimented during a sex scene it’s always tagged “praise kink”. I honestly thought that was standard procedure - am I just naïve?

Papyrus felt a pressure build, until it was almost burgeoning, and it compelled him to thrust harder, faster, until Sans was entirely off the bed, suspended by Papyrus’ hands as he was pummeled. Any harder and his hips would snap. It was a brutal, desperate fuck. Sans could barely speak.

“gonna-- gonna split me in half if you keep that up, h-heh.”

Papyrus looked to him through his bleary, pleasured haze, and it seemed very appealing. God, Sans, above him, naked, face contorting in pleasure as they fucked (how very scandalous!), it was everything he could have--

“y-you gonna cum, pappy?”

That did it.

Papyrus’ body locked in place, before a guttural, broken groan crawled out of his mouth as he spurted his seed in a very sore, very weary Sans.

His hips began to spasm as his body experienced release for the very first time. He looked as confused as he did blissed out, toes curling and grip tightening enough to bruise bone.

Fun fact: you can actually bruise bone. It’s less severe than a fracture but it swells up and looks bad and, I hear, hurts like shit. (Note: admin has never sustained a severe traumatic injury in their life, despite their seeming best efforts.)

In exquisite, writhing agony, Papyrus continued to thrust as best he could. It felt like he was on fire, like his nerves were being individually set alight and tugged on and abused, and he didn’t recall ever feeling so fantastic,

I dunno about you man but that description didn’t make it sound so fantastic to me

so finally fulfilled.

Sans had his eyes shut, and Papyrus attributed it to arousal.

“I--I CAN’T-- I CAN’T STOP THIS MUST HURT I’M SORRY--”

He was hammering into Sans smaller body like he was battering a nail into a wall, over and over, while Sans could only make hiccup noises upon each impact until finally, Papyrus slowed, spent. Wincing at the raw piece of flesh between his legs, Sans scraped himself off, wincing as Papyrus’ painfully hard cock intensified the pain of removal before lying down, wheezing and prostrated. His cunt vanished and he was left with a tingling, hollow warmth.

Also I still can’t get over fucking magical genitalia.

Papyrus turned to face him, eyes lidded and grin dopey, cuddling up and peppering him with kisses.

Sans responded. Hands on his shoulders. A kiss on the scalp. Stroke it; one, two, one, two--

Stroke what?

“DID YOU… FINISH?”

No.

“yeah.”

But the fic’s still going. :/

Papyrus’ shoulders sunk in relief.

“OH, GOOD! I WAS WORRIED, SINCE I’M SO INEXPERIENCED.”

“night.”

Sans turned, eyes open, to face away from Papyrus, his book no longer holding any appeal.

“... TIRED! YOU MUST BE EXHAUSTED. OF COURSE, I… WAS QUITE VIGOROUS IN MY LOVEMAKING!

On the one hand, I really want someone to voice act this in that goofy fanon Skeletor knock-off voice. But on the other hand,

I UNDERSTAND YOUR RAMPANT LAZINESS.”

Papyrus gave him a gentle smooch on the back of the head.

“I’M OFF TO GO HAVE A SHOWER. I LEAKED LIKE A FAUCET, AND I DON’T LIKE THIS STICKINESS.”

Sans winced.

“UNLESS YOU WOULD LIKE TO JOIN ME…? WE DON’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT COVERING UP ANYMORE.”

“i’ll pass, thanks.”

“NO PROBLEM. ENJOY HAVING ONE OF THOSE HIDEOUSLY LONG NAPS,” he ribbed affectionately, “WHILE I’M OFF TO BE A PRODUCTIVE MEMBER OF SOCIETY.”

“yeah.”

The door clicked shut, bathing Sans in a pale, blue night, and he felt cum coat the inside of his ribs.

I cannot emphasize enough how weird the skeletonfucking is. Shit ain’t normal. Get it together, Undertale fandom.

Papyrus, despite having the understanding needed to appreciate the pleasure that came with sex, lacked the capacity to discern when it was appropriate. He would readily take and understand a ‘no’, but saw nothing wrong with pestering Sans every time he was hard, which, given his recent discovery of sexual gratification, was often.

It’s talking about THIS GUY

GET IT TOGETHER, UNDERTALE FANDOM

Sans was currently doing the dishes. Papyrus had swanned in after him and pressed his erection into the bulk of his tailbone, breathing heavily.

“SANS,” he purred, low and dripping with want. He slipped the front of his pants down, slowly rubbing it over the polyester of Sans’ shorts and leaving them wet with precum. He gripped in earnest before humping, jostling Sans against the counter, the motion summoning his own cock.

He couldn’t deal with the shame of enjoying it in earnest, not yet. And Undyne would be arriving soon for dinner.

“i’m-- i’m not--”

Papyrus was fucking his clothing, panting and moaning in want. He squatted to improve the friction, rutting loudly enough to fill the kitchen, while Sans gripped the counter in an effort to keep from falling off the stool he was stood on.

“--really in the mood right now, pap.”

Papyrus slowed as the words sunk in, before blinking. Then, he stopped entirely before rooting down the front of Sans’ joggers.

“... BUT YOU’RE HARD. IS SOMETHING THE MATTER?”

“just… not feelin’ it,

...I’m sorry. I’ll show myself out.

bro,” he lied.

Sans cursed at himself. This isn’t the way he had seen his life going.

“... OH. WELL, DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT! THEY ALWAYS GO DOWN AFTER A WHILE, EVEN WHEN THEY’RE REALLY, REALLY HARD.”

Sans put the dish in the sink, leaving the water to fester, before giving Papyrus a confused glance.

“can’t you just go jerk it in the bathroom?”

Papyrus cocked his head.

“WHAT?”

I think y’all’ve noticed I’m having far too much fun with the Undertale dialogue box generator...

Oh.

“... y’know? masturbate?”

“I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT IS.”

Sans balked.

“how the hell can you not know?”

“YOU NEVER TOLD ME.”

*insert sweet summer child joke here*

Something twisted in Sans’ gut. A wrong he had to make right. Another bout of self-abasement he apparently couldn’t refrain from.

“go sit down,” he said quietly.

Papyrus did so, his considerable erection tenting his shorts as he sat down in the living room, legs spread, self consciousness not occurring to him. Sans followed, sitting next to him.

“take it ou--”

Papyrus had already done so,

On the plus side, you’ll never catch me with a Harambe joke here.

In 2017, at least.

looking very pleased with where the situation was headed. Slowly, Sans gripped the hard mass of Papyrus’ cock, before softly tugging, as he would his own. Papyrus whimpered, raising his hips off the sofa in desperation.

“don’t shut your eyes.”

Papyrus looked at him, eyes lidded, cock twitching. Sans averted his gaze.

“don’t look at me, either. look at what i’m doin.”

S̶̗H̯̜̤̩͉̺̘A̴̼̤͎͝K̵̼̝̰ͅÈ̗̱̖̟̮̮  T̙̮͓HA̶̝̺̖̰̪̭T̛͖̣̳̞̫  B̸̘̗͇̥͍̬̜͔͐͋̉̑͗̿̐͠͞ͅO̠̜̜͑ͫͅN̶̜͕̥͓͙̤̓̉ͫ̍́͝E̘̼͕̫͆̄ͬͭͨ́̏ͥ͢͡

For effect, Sans tugged a little harder than he should have, and Papyrus moaned.

If he learns, he’ll do it himself. Lighten the load. Get it over with once, save himself the hassle in the future. To quiet Papyrus’ worries, Sans tugged on it one more time, and squeezed a yelp out of him.

Papyrus clumsily pawed at Sans’ cock in tandem over his sweatpants.

“D-DOES THIS FEEL GOOD?”

Fuck. It actually did.

“y-yeah.”

Sans took a deep breath, feeling a growing, gnawing heat, and resumed his ministrations.

I fuckin’ hate that word.

Jerking evenly from the bottom to the leaking tip, the flesh of his cock sliding to accommodate the motions as it slowly grew wet with precum.

He felt himself drip.

He had been so wrapped in self-rancour these past few weeks that it was becoming harder and harder to have it stick. Now it was just… Happening.  He didn’t protest when Papyrus fumblingly pulled his fat cock out.

It was just.

Happening.

This isn’t the kind of Happening I’ve been waiting my whole life for-!!

Papyrus looked to what Sans was doing, scrutinizing, studying as an apprentice would, before inexpertly mimicking the movements. Squeezing too hard, and rubbing too quickly. Thinking back to their last time, Papyrus removed his glove before hesitatingly spitting into his palm. Filthy. Dirty. Good.

Bad.

Sans sighed in resignation because with the benefit of lube he was probably going to cum this time.

On cue, Papyrus began to jerk again, and Sans’ chest rumbled in pleasure. Papyrus looked smug.

“OH, YOU DO MAKE NOISE! NOT SO HIGH AND MIGHTY NOW, MR. SILENCE-IN-BED MAN.”

Sounds like the world’s worst superhero to me.

...okay, maybe not the world’s worst superhero, but definitely up there.

Sans could only watch as he came undone, legs opening to accommodate Papyrus’ movements as they grew more confident, until they were jerking each other off in perfect tandem

But this is certainly the world’s worst proposed Olympic event.

and Papyrus’ louder vocalisations were joined by Sans’ quiet, more restrained moans. The sensation still being a novelty to him, Papyrus came first, loud and thrashing and uncontrolled, yelping, “SANS! SANS!” as if he would never be able to say it again when it was all over. Papyrus’ grip went limp and fell away, just as Sans’ climax was building. He could take comfort in the fact that at least he had never cum. Hide behind that last bastion of dignity.

Dignity?

On this blog?!

Papyrus ducked down, and before Sans could process what was happening, his cock with slicked with saliva as Papyrus fucked him with the wet cavern of his mouth.

“d-dude--!”

Caught off-guard, he came in Papyrus’ mouth, gripping his skull on instinct and pressing him down until he could only make choked noises. Papyrus gave him two solid thuds on the hip, a signal to tap out, and Sans let go. He was shaking from the come-down, eyes unfocused.

“s-sorry, sorry, didn’t mean to be so rough.”

“I LIKED IT! THAT FELT GOOD.”

BAD.

Sans wasn’t quite sure how to quantify what he was feeling, but a small part of it was ‘relief’, while the bulk was ‘overwhelming self-loathing’, but that wasn’t new.  Absently, he glanced to the clock on the wall while he adjusted his sweatpants.

“geeze, we cut it close.”

“WE DID. I LIKE THE IDEA THAT WE MIGHT BE CAUGHT. IT MAKES IT FEEL BETTER.”

A statement like that regarding the one of single deepest taboos available did not inspire confidence in Sans.

Tchyeah, what’s next, cuckoldry?

“you remember what i said?”

“‘DON’T TELL ANYONE’, YES, I KNOW. BUT I COULD HANDLE ALL THE SHAME IN THE WORLD IF IT MEANT I COULD BE WITH YOU.”

Sans couldn’t.

Papyrus sat up, hoping they hadn’t stained the couches.

“I DON’T LIKE THE SNEAKING AROUND. THIS IS OUR HOUSE, WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO WHAT WE WANT.”

“that’s naive.”

“SO? I THINK PEOPLE ARE KINDER THAN YOU ASSUME.”

That’s until you tell them some shit about incest or-

Fuck okay that random line hit kind of close to home.

Jeez, maybe I should stop presenting myself as being oh so non-judgemental. It really attracts... things. Uncomfortable things. Secrets I agree to keep even though I don’t wanna and it’s stressing me out and making me feel sick and now I’m vagueblogging about it in the middle of a sporking because this is the one place I’m sure the guy who told me doesn’t read.

...moving on.

The doorbell rang, and Papyrus set about cleaning himself up at once. He pointed to himself.

“HOW’S THE FACE?”

“fine.”

Papyrus opened his mouth.

“dude, swallow, there’s some hangin’ out in the back of your jaw.”

He gulped, before opening his mouth again.

“... yeah, there ya go.”

Papyrus stood up, striding over to answer the door.

“you sure it’s undyne?”

“Are you scrubs even home?!”

“nevermind.”

I’m genuinely surprised she didn’t actually walk in on them, this seems like the kind of fic where it would happen.

Undyne chewed her way through her spaghetti dinner, engrossed in her own story, open mouthed and braying.

“-- So then the guy said to me ‘look, I didn’t steal anything! I thought they were giving away free samples’. If I caught him eating a grape, I’d have bought it, but the thing is he had a computer under his arm. He had just walked out with it!”

Why do I feel like anyone who’s ever worked in retail probably has a story similar to this one?

Papyrus balked, enthralled, while Sans watched them both.

“DID HE THINK THAT WOULD WORK?”

“Yeah!! He thought I was just gonna be like ‘oh shit dude sorry for the confusion’, instead of laughing and punching him real hard. It’s nuts what people’ll do when they’re caught! I’ve got another story, some guy tried to smuggle an entire toy piano up his--”

She looked to dinner.

“-- You know what, it can wait ‘till later.

So, what have you been up to, Paps?”

Papyrus hemmed in thought, methodically spinning his fork. Sans was cramming as much into his maw as he could manage, staining his shirt.

“WELL,” he began, “I’VE BEEN TRYING TO WORK ON MY LEG STRENGTH RECENTLY, NOW THAT I’VE BEEN TAKING RUNNING MORE SERIOUSLY.”

Undyne nodded in appreciation.

“You doing those leg squats I taught you?”

“I AM.”

“Cool.”

Squats > all other forms of exercise

You laugh, right up until I murder you with my thighs.

(Hey, I used to fence, okay...)

“SANS HAS… HAD A BURGER NAMED AFTER HIM AT GRILLBY’S.”

She looked back, pleased.

“What’s in it?”

“bun, cheese, ketchup.”

“That’s so gross, I’m gonna order, like, five.”

Alright now I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Please note that this is a blind sporking, by the way, or at least it has been for the past little bit since when I found the fic I only read up until the “You don’t know how to masturbate?” scene.

Which, by the way, I typo’d ‘masturbate’ as ‘mustardbate’ just now. >_>

And without missing a beat, Papyrus decided to add to the conversation further, all cosied up in the living room, sat against the the beaten up dining table.

“SANS AND I ARE IN LOVE!”

And by the way I’m psychic.

Sans dropped his fork. A dawning, creeping horror set upon him.

“You’re bros,” she snorted, “of course you love each other. You guys fall out, or something?”

UNDYNE RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN

Sans looked to Papyrus, broken. He couldn’t handle obloquy.

obloquy

...geez, this is the first time in, like, ever I’ve had to actually look up a word in a fic.

Google says it’s “strong public criticism or verbal abuse” or “disgrace, especially that brought about by public abuse.” I assume the author’s going for the second definition here.

The thing is, the word hasn’t been in common-ish use since the 1850s, and even then - I mean, I’ve read books from the time when people sorta used the word and I’ve never heard it before.

Which makes it kind of out of place in an Undertale fanfic, don’t you think?

Please, people, there’s nothing wrong with looking up synonyms when you need to sound cool - but do try to keep context in mind. Don’t use a word that turns back only one result in Google Books.

He could barely handle waking up.

“please.”

“SHE HAS TO KNOW.”

Papyrus stared at her, while Sans stared through her.

“papyrus.”

She laughed, less emphatically this time, still chowing down on her pasta.

“Didn’t think you were one for gross-out humour, dude. Bleh! You got me.”

He held the gaze until finally, it sank in.

“Y-You two are…?”

“SLEEPING TOGETHER,” he said plainly, “YES.”

Undyne retched, and Papyrus dimly hoped that it was his cooking. She could only sputter in disbelief as her mind tried to put together the pieces.  

“Papyrus, that’s… That’s sick.”

“WE LOVE EACH OTHER, AND WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF OUR LIVES TOGETHER.”

She gagged again, guts shaking, a thick trail of saliva dangling from her mouth before hitting the floor.

“WE’RE GOING TO GET MARRIED, ONE DAY.”

She threw up, splattering the carpet in slurry while Papyrus recoiled in disgust.

That’s... a tad extreme.

“UNDYNE!”

Sans braced his hands to his skull. This wasn’t happening.

“LOOK--”

She grabbed her coat and left, stepping out into the porch, unable to process what she had heard, before turning around, sprinting back into the living room and grabbing Sans by the collar. Oh. She was going to kill him.

Good ending?

“You think you can force people to do whatever sick shit you want, huh? You think you can force Papyrus to do whatever the you want, freak?”

Dully, Sans noticed the spears manifest, but snapped back to awareness when Papyrus cleaved them out of the air with a whoosh of magic and a snap of bone.

“NOBODY,” he thundered, “IS FORCING ANYONE.”

“You don’t have to lie for him, you don’t--”

Papyrus stood his ground, squaring up, feet planted firmly and his stature looming.

“WE’RE IN LOVE, DEAL WITH IT OR LEAVE.”

A torrid mixture of pity and disgust swirling in her gut, she tossed Sans back to the couch and stormed out the front door, slamming it behind her and leaving them in silence. Papyrus released the breath he had been holding while Sans noted that yes, he was still alive, and yes, the shame was insurmountable. The room stunk of fresh bile, the acrid, foreign reek of vomit.

“... I DIDN’T THINK SHE WOULD ACTUALLY LEAVE.”

Hahahahahahaha who’s the audience stand-in now??

“yeah,” Sans scolded, more acquainted with the real world and thus how people usually react to such situation, “she did.”  

“I ASSUMED SHE WOULD JUST… UNDERSTAND. LIKE WE DO.”

Sans said nothing, and Papyrus slowly sunk down to sit.

“OH NO.”

He scratched at the nape of his neck.

“OH NO. DO YOU… DO YOU THINK SHE WENT RIGHT HOME--?”

“i don’t know.”

Papyrus jolted, before setting out to get the vinegar. He had thirty minutes to kill until Undyne arrived home, and he wasn’t going to do it in a fog of regurgitated spaghetti. The motions would distract him. The act of making something clean.

In this fic?

Papyrus called, and she picked up on the first trill.

“HI, UNDYNE!”

Nothing.

“I, UM… WANTED TO TALK ABOUT EARLIER.”

Breathing. Oh good, she was there.

“I THOUGHT IT WAS BEST THAT YOU KNEW.”

The room was emptied of noise, and he could feel Sans’ gaze bore into him.

“I ONLY TOLD YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE MY BEST FRIEND. YOU DON’T HAVE TO UNDERSTAND. YOU DON’T HAVE TO LIKE IT. BUT PLEASE, PLEASE DON’T TELL ANYONE ELSE.”

Finally, a response.

“... I won’t tell anyone else.”

Hey look just once can I find a fucked-up fic to spork that isn’t somehow relevant to my life situation that’d be nice

I mean, what.

Papyrus could almost whoop, she was on board, she understood!

Would it come across as defensive if I pointed out that agreeing to some kind of “Don’t ask, don’t tell” situation doesn’t mean you understand? Or condone? Definitely not condone.

Hell, I don’t condone anything on this blog except improving your craft.

Love like this wasn’t wrong, it came with blood!

“OH, I’M SO, SO HAPPY YOU--”

He was cut off by the dialtone. His sentence trailed off.

Oh… A poor signal. No problem!

He rang her number again and it rang out before going to her answering machine.

git rekt

‘Heya, Undyne here! If you can’t get me, I’m--’

He hung up and tried again. Four rings, then to answering machine.

‘Heya, Undyne--’

He hung up, and tried again.

‘Heya, Undyne here! If you can’t get me, I’m either wailing on some punks, or in the shower! Scream your message down the phone, and I’ll get back to you later!’

He declined to do that.

“I JUST WANTED TO, UM… SAY THANK YOU. IT MUST HAVE BEEN QUITE THE SHOCK! SO THANK YOU FOR TAKING IT SO WELL.”

I’d like to know in which universe is vomiting all over the kitchen floor and then trying to kill someone ‘taking it so well’.

Then again I guess she didn’t actually kill him.

He left a pregnant pause hanging in the air, long enough for Undyne to pick up if she were in the room. She didn’t, so she wasn’t.

“I LOOK FORWARD TO TRAINING. SEE YOU!”

Another pause, just in case she had walked in. She must have went outside, to have not picked up for so long.

“BYE-BYE, UNDYNE!”

He hesitated, before hanging up, and staring at the phone in his hand. Sans was slumped on the couch.

“only thing i asked you to do.”

“SHE SAID SHE WOULDN’T TELL ANYONE.”

“one thing, papyrus.”

*insert “You had one job!” joke here*

Sans held his face in his hands, his face as locked in place as ever, his bones hanging where they fell.

“what the fuck’re we gonna do.”

“ARE YOU ASHAMED?”

I’m feeling second-hand shame just from having this in my search history, if that’s worth anything.

Sans looked at him, too upset for tears, lodged firmly in a miasmatic fog of ignominy. He then stared forward into nothingness. Papyrus tugged at his gloves, guilt setting in.

“SANS.”

“yeah?”

“DO YOU LOVE ME?”

♩ I’m your wife-

Wait. Wrong thing.

“yeah.”

“IN WHAT WAY--?”

“you happy?”

“... YES.”

Sans chuckled, low, dark, and humourless.

“then in whatever way you think.”

Papyrus made the decision to take that statement at face value, because good boys didn’t pry into things they couldn’t handle the answer to.

And... that’s the end of that.

You know... as I said, this is well-written. And it was intentionally written to be disturbing and to have a warped dynamic.

So why did I spork this, again?

Stupid ship, and disturbing subject matter - intentional or not! - is always welcome here. I’d spork my own fics if I could do so objectively. (And by own fics, I mean my recent uploads, since I have indeed sporked my own fics before.)

But yeah. That’s where this leaves us.

Content aside, a good fic, apart from some POV trip-ups and the author occasionally trying a bit too hard with the vocabulary.

Guess that’s it for today. I promise I get to those liveblogs before they turn into another The Classic Lit Week/Longer That Never Was.

Toodles!