#i got 26 years with him and that's more than anyone can ever ask

[azurescaled]

My apologies for being kinda quiet today.

[softshuji]

Any men out there wanna pretend to be my bf to get my parents off my case about marriage? I am so so serious right now.

[lvnleah]

this is a really long request ess t so feel free to ignore lol

Reader got pregnant young and drunk so has a young daughter and works in a pub. Alessia has been going to pub since joining arsenal bc it’s cozy and near her house and they met. They become close friends (they're in LOVE with each other but are kind of oblivious to eachother), everytime she has a chance Alessia spends time with R and R daughter, always always together, they're basically a married couple with a kid, to the point Alessias lockscreen is a picture of the 3 of them but she never told anyone about the pub and or R and her daughter (who basically grew up with less around, loves her like her other mum) because she wants to protect them. One day the arsenal girls ask her where she always goes, andl she takes them to the pub. At the pub less is nervous and when the girls ask her what is wrong she see a creepy man bothering R, when he touches her she goes mad, shocking everyone including herself when she punches him. Girls are shocked bc they saw sweet Alessia punching someone and they now know about her and R. Team learn more about R and her daughter and after meeting for good reader and daughter and see how they behave, they help Alessia finally confess her feelings. 💗💗

Finding home | Alessia Russo

I truly love this so thank you for the idea anon!

word count: 2.4k | masterlist

You hadn’t expected much when you clocked into your shift at the pub that evening. It was another long night ahead, and the buzz of conversation mingled with the clinking of glasses had already settled into a steady rhythm. At 25, you had your life together—or as together as it could be.

You had Daisy, your bright, energetic 4-year-old daughter, who was your world. You’d gotten pregnant at 21, and while those early days had been overwhelming, you found a way to cope. Between work and raising Daisy, you had a routine, a flow to your days.

Then one night she walked in—Alessia. She caught your attention the second she stepped through the door. You didn’t know who she was at the time. Just another customer. But something about her stood out. Maybe it was the way she smiled, that soft, genuine curve of her lips, or how her eyes crinkled slightly at the edges, filled with warmth even though you hadn’t exchanged more than a hello.

“Hi,” she said, leaning on the counter, her voice soft but steady. “I’m new to the area.”

You found yourself smiling back, something about her putting you at ease. “Welcome. What can I get you?”

You didn’t know it then, but that was the start of everything.

Over the next few weeks, Alessia became a regular at the pub. It didn’t take long for the two of you to become close. She’d just moved to the area, having signed with Arsenal, and though she was adjusting to her new life, she always found her way back to the pub. Back to you.

There was something natural about the way you two clicked. The conversation flowed effortlessly, and before long, you were hanging out outside of work. Coffee here, a walk there. Soon, she’d met Daisy, and the bond between the three of you grew quickly. Alessia had a way with Daisy, a knack for making her laugh in that full-belly kind of way that made your heart swell.

You weren’t blind to how you felt about Alessia. The way your heart quickened when she smiled at you, how your day brightened when you saw her name pop up on your phone. You knew, deep down, that you were in love with her. And you could tell Alessia felt the same. But neither of you ever said it. The fear of ruining what you had, of stepping over that invisible line, kept you both silent.

A year passed, and nothing had really changed—yet everything had. You were 26 now, Alessia 25, and Daisy, who had just turned 5, had started to call Alessia her “other mum” to other people. She adored Alessia, clinging to her whenever she was around, and you couldn’t blame her. Alessia made you both feel seen and cared for.

Movie nights with Alessia and Daisy had quickly become a tradition, a cosy ritual that the three of you looked forward to at the end of a long week. Tonight was no different.

Daisy, ever the ball of energy, was bouncing around the living room in her pyjamas, clutching her favourite stuffed animal while you set up the film. You smiled to yourself, watching her dance around in excitement. The movie didn’t really matter—Daisy rarely stayed still long enough to watch the entire thing—but it was the atmosphere that counted.

Alessia sat on the couch, her long legs stretched out as she tried to corral Daisy. “C’mere, munchkin!” she called, laughing when Daisy climbed up onto her lap with a dramatic sigh.

You grabbed the bowl of popcorn and settled in on the other side of the couch, the warm weight of the evening wrapping around the three of you like a blanket. Alessia leaned in slightly, close enough that your arms brushed, and Daisy nestled herself between you both, already giggling at something on the screen.

As the movie started, Daisy squirmed a little, trying to get comfortable between you and Alessia. “What’s this one called again?” she asked, her wide eyes flicking between you both.

“It’s Moana, remember?” Alessia answered, gently brushing a strand of Daisy’s hair out of her face. “We’ve watched it, like, ten times already.”

Daisy giggled, snuggling closer to Alessia. “Oh yeah! I like when she sings. You know, like this—” She cleared her throat dramatically before belting out, “I am Moana!” with as much enthusiasm as her little lungs could muster.

Alessia laughed, looking over at you with that familiar playful smile. “She’s a natural, don’t you think?”

You grinned, nodding. “Definitely. We might have a future superstar on our hands.”

Daisy giggled. “I’m gonna be just like Moana when I grow up. Right, Lessi?”

Alessia leaned down, her eyes twinkling as she whispered conspiratorially, “I think you’re already cooler than Moana.”

Daisy’s face lit up. “Really?”

“Really,” Alessia said with a wink. “Moana’s brave, but I bet she couldn’t dribble a football like you.”

Daisy giggled, delighted by the compliment. “You’re right! I’m better!” Then, after a moment, she asked, “Can we play football tomorrow? You can show me more tricks?”

“Of course,” Alessia replied, her voice soft. “I’ll teach you anything you want. You’re gonna be a pro in no time.”

Daisy seemed to consider this for a moment, then added, “And after football, can we have ice cream?”

Alessia glanced at you, raising an eyebrow as if asking for permission. You shrugged, smiling. “If you both behave.”

“Yessss!” Daisy pumped her fist, clearly excited about tomorrow’s plans.

As the movie continued, Daisy asked a hundred questions, as usual. “Why is the ocean magic? Can we go to the ocean tomorrow too?” she asked, leaning back against Alessia.

Alessia smiled, amused by Daisy’s endless curiosity. “We’ll have to see how far we can get after football and ice cream. It might be a bit too cold for the ocean though, we might have to stick to swimming.”

“Yay!” Daisy cheered, then turned to you. “Mummy, can we bring Lessi to swimming lessons with us?”

You exchanged a glance with Alessia, feeling your heart warm at how easily Daisy wove her into your lives. “Of course, we can, Dais.”

With that, Daisy seemed satisfied, and her questions quieted down as she nestled into Alessia’s side. Alessia wrapped an arm around her, keeping her close, and shot you a soft, affectionate smile.

“Guess I’m stuck with you two, huh?” she whispered teasingly.

You chuckled, nudging her gently. “You know you love it.”

“I really do,” she murmured, her voice so quiet you almost missed it, but the warmth in her eyes said enough.

You noticed how effortlessly Alessia fit into your life. She wasn’t just a guest here; she belonged. The way she held Daisy’s hand when a particularly suspenseful scene came on, or how she absentmindedly passed you the popcorn—every movement, every glance, felt like home.

Daisy, always the chatterbox, kept turning to ask questions about the movie, and Alessia, ever patient, answered each one as though it was the most important thing in the world. It was moments like this that made your heart swell.

Halfway through the movie, Daisy had curled up against Alessia’s chest, her eyes drooping with sleep. Alessia shifted slightly, careful not to wake her, and you caught the soft look in her eyes as she glanced down at Daisy. There was so much love in that look, so much tenderness that it made your breath catch.

You had become something of an old married couple, without ever defining what “you” were. There were stolen glances, playful touches, and inside jokes that only the two of you understood. You were always together, practically inseparable, and people around you began to notice.

Some of Alessia’s friends had caught on—Lotte had met you early on and was one of the few who knew the whole story. But others had only heard bits and pieces about a girl Alessia had met. She never mentioned your name or Daisy.

It was a Thursday night when Alessia brought some of her teammates to the pub. You didn’t know at first, of course. You were busy behind the bar, moving from one customer to the next, keeping up with orders. But when you glanced up, there they were, a group of them gathered at a table near the back. Alessia sat with them, looking slightly nervous, which wasn’t like her.

You could see her teammates chatting away, curious glances occasionally directed toward you. You wondered what she’d told them, if anything. Lotte caught your eye and waved, but the others didn’t seem to recognize you.

As the night went on, Alessia seemed more on edge. You noticed it in the way her eyes kept darting toward the bar, like she was checking on you. Then it happened. A man, one of the regulars you weren’t too fond of, had sidled up next to you at the bar, clearly a little too drunk. He’d been making comments all night, none of which sat well with you, but you’d brushed them off, used to dealing with that kind of thing. But when he reached out and touched your arm, something in the air shifted.

Before you could even react, Alessia was out of her seat. The sound of her voice, usually so soft, was sharp and commanding as she stormed over, eyes blazing.

“Get your hands off her,” she practically growled, her voice louder than you’d ever heard it.

The pub went silent. Everyone turned to watch as Alessia squared up to the man, her entire demeanour transformed. The sweet, gentle Alessia you knew was gone, replaced by someone fiercely protective, someone who wasn’t going to let anyone cross a line with you.

The man, clearly startled by her sudden outburst, backed off quickly, muttering an apology before slinking away. Alessia stood there for a moment, chest heaving, as if even she couldn’t believe what had just happened. Her teammates were wide-eyed, jaws practically on the floor. They had never seen her like that before.

When Alessia finally turned back to you, her expression softened instantly, concerned replacing the anger that had flared up moments before. “Are you okay?” she asked, her voice quieter now, almost tentative.

You nodded, still a little shocked yourself. “Yeah. Thanks.”

Alessia took a breath, running a hand through her hair as her teammates approached, clearly wanting answers. Lotte had a knowing smile on her face, but the others looked confused and curious.

“Everything okay?” Beth asked, glancing between the two of you.

Alessia hesitated for a second, then nodded. “Yeah, it’s fine. Just… protecting what’s important.”

It was then that she turned to introduce you properly to the team. “This is her,” Alessia said, her voice softer again, a small smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. “This is who I’ve been telling you about.”

You smiled awkwardly as the girls greeted you, and slowly the tension eased. They asked questions, mostly about how long you’d known each other, and how you met. But eventually, the conversation shifted to Daisy, and the smiles around the table grew warmer when they learned about your little girl.

By the end of the night, you weren’t just a mystery anymore. You were a part of Alessia’s world, just like she was a part of yours.

A few weeks had passed since the incident at the pub. Alessia had returned to her usual self, although there was a noticeable change in the way her teammates interacted with you now—warmer, more knowing. It felt like they saw you not just as a friend of Alessia’s, but as someone who was clearly important to her.

You hadn’t brought up what had happened, not wanting to make a big deal out of it, but it lingered in the back of your mind. Alessia’s protectiveness, her intensity that night—it had stirred something deep within you. You knew there was more to your relationship than just friendship, but neither of you had ever found the right moment to say it out loud.

That was, until one evening.

Alessia had just come back from training, and you were at home, tidying up after dinner with Daisy. The door swung open, and she stepped in, looking slightly flustered. Her hair was still damp from a quick post-training shower.

“Hey, you okay?” you asked, turning toward her, sensing that something was on her mind.

She hesitated for a second before crossing the room in a few strides, stopping right in front of you. Her hands reached out, resting gently on your hands, and she took a deep breath.

“I need to ask you something,” she said, her voice steady but laced with a hint of nerves.

You blinked, taken aback by the sudden seriousness. “Okay…”

Alessia bit her lip, “The girls—they’ve been telling me to just… say something. To stop being scared. And they’re right. I can’t keep pretending like this isn’t real.”

Your heart started to race. You had a feeling where this was going, but you didn’t dare assume.

“I love you,” she finally said, the words spilling out all at once. “I’ve been in love with you for a long time now, and I know you probably already know that, but I just… I needed to say it. I don’t want to be just friends anymore. I want to be with you, for real.”

Your breath caught in your throat as the weight of her words settled over you. For a moment, you couldn’t speak, too overwhelmed by the flood of emotions.

“Alessia…” you whispered, tears pricking at your eyes as you took in the sincerity in her expression.

She squeezed your hands gently as if to steady herself. “So, will you be my girlfriend? Officially?”

A smile broke across your face, and you nodded, barely able to get the words out. “Yes. Yes, of course, I will.”

Before you could say anything else, Alessia pulled you into a kiss. Her hand rested on the small of your back as the kiss deepened. It was something you’d been craving for a long time.

When you finally pulled back, Alessia was smiling “I can’t believe it took me this long,” she murmured.

You chuckled, shaking your head. “Honestly, I was waiting for you to figure it out. I was too scared.”

Alessia laughed softly, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Well, I’m glad I finally did.”

Just then, a sleepy voice from the doorway interrupted the moment.

“Mummy? Lessi? What’s happening?” Daisy rubbed her eyes, clearly having woken up from a nap.

Alessia crouched down to Daisy’s level, her smile widening. “Guess what, Daisy? Your mum and I… we’re officially together now.”

Daisy blinked, processing the information. Then, with a huge grin, she ran over and hugged Alessia around the neck. “Yay! Does that mean we can be a family now?”

You exchanged a tender look with Alessia before nodding. “Yeah, Dais. We already are a family.”

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Yandere diaries. || Toby x reader. A new (possible) series I got the idea to do of the creeps doing diaries showing them gradually becoming yandere.

3k words. CW: Yandere, adult content (mentions of arousal and references to masturbation), descriptions of violence and gore, unhealthy relationships, severe abuse, delusions, Toby slipping into insanity and also being an unhonest/unreliable narrator with how awful he’s being.

4/26/22 -

I met someone new today! We bumped into each other at a park I like to go to on Earth. They were so kind to me. We ended up getting ice cream together and exchanging numbers. I hope I can see them again soon.

5/11/22 -

I’ve been able to see them a couple more times. We’ve been messaging regularly, and have also called a couple of times. I’ve never felt so connected to someone so quickly before. We have a lot in common, and they don’t even mind any of my tics or odd quirks. We have a plan to meet up this weekend and go to the movies together, I’m really looking forward to it. I hope we continue to be friends with each other for a long time!

5/14/22 -

I just got home. We had such a fun time at the movies! We saw one of the more recent horror films together. They got scared partway through and clung onto me to feel better, and it made me feel really happy and protective over them. I wouldn’t mind seeing more horror movies with them in the future if it means that they’d do that again. We haven’t known each other very long, but I feel so connected and interested in them, I feel sparks every time they touch me. Is this what falling in love feels like?

6/21/22 -

I haven’t been able to see them for a few weeks because of our schedule differences. I feel like I’ve been excessively sad because of that. I just feel like my life is so much dimmer without them. I wanna go to the park with them again, eat ice cream, and curl up under a tree with them. I wish I could be with them every day.

7/29/22 -

We haven’t known each other for a very long time, but I’m certain they’re the person I’m meant to be with for the rest of my life. They make me the happiest I’ve ever felt, they understand me like nobody has ever understood me before, I just feel so carefree and excited in their presence. I think they might feel the same way about me too. I need to try my best to build up some courage and ask them to be my partner before someone else can.

8/11/22 -

I asked them on a date and they said yes!! I’ve never felt more excited than I am right now!! We’re going on our first date in a few days. I need to make sure I have a nice outfit to wear because I want to take them somewhere nice to eat, and then we’re gonna go for a walk together and stargaze. My life truly feels so complete and wonderful right now, I feel like I’m finally on a path to keep getting better with them in my life!

11/24/22 -

I haven’t been dating them very long, but I convinced Slender to allow me to invite them to Thanksgiving dinner. Normally we have to date our partners for a year, but I just know our relationship is going to work out, so I don’t feel the need to wait that long. They had so much fun meeting everyone, and they were happy the whole time. I felt a bit jealous that they didn’t pay as much attention to me, but that’s okay because there were so many new people they had to meet. I’m sure next time I invite them over they won’t pay anyone else any attention. I’m looking forward to having them over here more often!

12/14/22 -

I got into an argument with Jeff today. I had them over to visit me, and I stepped away for a minute to get us some snacks and Jeff so rudely decided to try and steal their attention from me. It isn’t fair! He was trying to make them laugh and hang out with him instead of me!! I got really angry and I started yelling at him, and he yelled back at me, claiming he wasn’t doing anything wrong. He’s not allowed to just walk up to them and act like they’re buddy-buddy. They’re my partner, and they’re here for me. Nobody else has the right to their attention but me.

12/25/22 -

I got to celebrate my first Christmas with them today. We spent a little bit of time downstairs with the others, but then I wanted to bring them upstairs to my room so we could be together alone. I gave them a bracelet with our names on it so that everyone would know they belonged to someone, and they seemed to like it. However, I got a bit upset at them. They said they had to go home so they could celebrate with their friends and family too, but aren’t I good enough? Aren’t I their family now? It doesn’t make any sense to me why they couldn’t just stay at the mansion, but I let them go. I’ll have a talk with them about this later.

1/24/23 -

We had another argument again. They have this friend that keeps overstepping his boundaries and I don’t appreciate it. He’s been hogging their attention recently and hanging out with them more and it’s seriously fucking pissing me off. They wouldn’t stop talking to him so I had to lie to them about him to finally get them to back off from him a bit. I wouldn’t normally want to do that, but it’s for their own good. Nobody should be hogging them away from me that much. Their friends are lucky I even allow them to talk with my dove at all. I think that’s what I’ll start calling them, now that I think about it. My sweet, soaring Dove.

2/17/23 -

I ended up getting into a fight with one of Dove’s friends. I was trying to make sure I could spend Valentine’s with Dove, but this friend wanted to be able to see them that day since he’s going on a trip soon or some other stupid excuse. It pissed me off. IM their boyfriend, that day is for US. I confronted him to get him to back off but he had the nerve to stand his ground. I had to beat the shit out of him to get him to understand his place. It’s been three days, and apparently, he hasn’t contacted them since. Good. One less pest I have to worry about. Dove was a little suspicious when I came home with torn-up knuckles that day, but I just told them it happened during training and they believed me. They even took the time and care to bandage me up. They really are so special to me. Nobody else can have them.

3/18/23 -

I’ve never really thought much about blood before. When it’s on myself or my victims, I’ve never really cared about it, I’ve actually usually thought it was gross, but it was different today. Dove got this gash when we were out on a hike from tripping and slicing their arm on a sharp rock. Normally the blood wouldn’t have bothered me, but it was just so pretty. The red spreading across their skin was just so alluring. Of course, I got them cleaned off and patched up as soon as I could, but my heart is racing just remembering it. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I hope they get cut again soon. I have to confirm if this feeling inside me is real or just a one-off.

3/28/23 -

It wasn’t a one-off. We were cooking, and they were using one of our sharper knives. My curiosity got the better of me, and I “accidentally” bumped into them from behind. They ended up cutting themself, and their blood was just as alluring today, flowing freely out of their finger. I ended up putting their finger in my mouth to suck the blood off, and I’ve never tasted something so intoxicating before. They were a bit confused, but I just played it off and they let it go. Holy shit. I feel like I have to taste it again. I have to. The red on their skin, the metallic lingering taste in my mouth. It’s so addicting. It honestly made me a bit excited, I had to take a moment to myself so they wouldn’t notice.

4/16/23 -

I bit them. We were making out, and I just felt myself getting so worked up. I pinned them down on my mattress, and I started kissing down Dove’s neck. I couldn’t help it, my heart was beating so fast and I felt myself getting dizzy, and I bit them really hard. Their skin was so soft in my mouth, and blood started oozing out, running against my teeth and my tongue, and my lips, it was so warm and exciting, it felt like I was getting drunk. Dove didn’t like it though. They screamed and cried and begged me to stop, and I didn’t want to, but I did. I bandaged them up and apologized and feigned innocence. They said they wanted to go home early, so I took them to not get on their bad side anymore. I was so worked up though. I had to take care of myself when I got home, I was just so turned on. I have to do it again somehow. They won’t like it, but I have to. Nothing has ever felt so pleasing before.

4/29/23 -

I tried to bite them again, and they realized it wasn’t an accident this time. They yelled at me and hit me to get me off of them, and I hit them back much harder. They looked so broken and upset while they cried, but their tears and screams got me just as turned on as their blood did. The bruise that formed on their cheek was so beautiful. I held them close and apologized a whole bunch because I don’t want them to hate me. I cried a lot and I meant it. I promised I wouldn’t do it again, which I guess I didn’t mean. However, they can’t just disobey me like that. I need to try and be on my best behavior so they can be more relaxed around me. I can’t have them fighting back every time I want to do something to them.

5/09/23 -

I think my Dove needs to be caged. They’ve gotten so used to flying free that they need to be grounded and brought back to reality. I keep trying to limit their interactions with others because they keep poisoning my Dove against me, and Dove tried to fight me today. We got in a big yelling match, but I was able to calm myself down in the nick of time so that I didn’t make things worse. I got them to calm down, and we’re gonna have some space between us for a few weeks. I think I’m going to take this opportunity to my advantage.

5/30/23 -

While we haven’t been spending time together, I’ve been working hard. I found an old house in the Underworld for cheap, and I’ve been rebuilding it and fixing it up. I altered it to be able to hold Dove in without their escape, and I’m so excited about it. I’ve got a bedroom I’m setting up for them, and a nice kitchen because they’ve always liked cooking with me. I know Dove is going to love it so much when I bring them here in a few weeks. It’s going to be the best thing for us. Dove is too innocent about the world around them, and I have to be able to protect them. Nobody else can do a better job than I can.

6/08/23 -

[Parts of the entry have been torn. Words are smudged or crossed out and it is not completely legible, but some of it remains visible. *Full translation will be added at the end for those that use translators/text to speech.]

I CAN'T FU—— BELI— TH—!! DOVE WAS TRY— TO MOVE!! THEY W— TRYING TO LE—E ME!! THAT STU— BASTARD [Redacted] TRIED TO TA— THEM F—M ME! WHEN ALL IVE ———— IS PROTECT TH— AND THIS IS —— REPAY ME?!? I'VE NEVER BE— SO ANGRY!!!

Dove is FUCKING LU—Y I had the home re—y! If not, I wo—d’ve just thrown th— in the fucki— basement!!! [Redacted] got wh— they deser—. I be— the- so bad you —— —king recognize —. I’ll du— the bo— som—ere else.

7/06/23 -

Dove hasn’t been making things any easier. Since they last tried to move away things have been such a fucking pain in the ass. They were so scared when I locked them in here. I wanted it to be a warm welcome, where I’d bring them here voluntarily, but they had to go and ruin it because of [Redacted] sticking his nose where it doesn’t belong. They tried to run away a few days ago, and I went to write about it but I was so fucking pissed I ripped the page to shreds. I had to break their ankles so that they wouldn’t be able to run again, least not for a long while. I’ve also been keeping them tied up more, but it’s easier now that they can’t walk. The bruises on their legs are just so beautiful. I think I might keep them like this, even though they cry every day from the pain and the circumstances, but their tears are beautiful as well. I have to get more painkillers soon for them.

10/18/23 -

It’s been a while since I’ve updated. Things have been going smoother lately. Every time Dove’s ankles start to heal, I’ve been breaking them again. I just can’t trust them because they tried to escape again. I’ve been enjoying myself a lot more. I can bite them and cut them and hit them whenever I want to. I can taste their blood and chew their skin and bruise their beautiful body however I like. Of course, sometimes it makes me sad when Dove gets so upset about it. I don’t know what to do. It gets me so turned on and riled up like nothing ever has before, but I also want them to love me. They haven’t been fighting back anymore, so I think they’re getting used to it. We’ll see.

12/25/23 -

It’s our second Christmas together. I got Dove a bunch of things they asked for since they’ve been so good. They seem to have given up hope of resisting me, and it’s made me so happy. They even made me a cake for Christmas, and it was so delicious. I’m so happy we can be together again like this, just a happy couple with no interruptions. It’s truly the best gift I could have received this year.

2/16/24 -

I’ve been letting Dove’s ankles and legs fully heal. They truly haven’t been trying anything, and they’ve been so devoted to being a good partner for me, I don’t think I need to break them anymore to teach them a lesson. They can nearly stand on their own now, and they seem so happy. They said it’s because they can hug me while standing, and that made me so happy to hear. We’ve started cooking together again. We’re becoming a happy family, and I’m so glad I was right that Dove is the one for me. They even let me bite them as much as I wanted today, and they let me scratch them too, they didn’t even cry out today. I could tell they were trying really hard, so it made me very happy.

4/25/24 -

Things have still been going well. Their legs have healed up perfectly. It’s been five months since I last broke them, and I think they’re so grateful for it. They don’t disobey me, they do everything I ask, they’re so affectionate and loving with me. It makes me so happy to know that they’re truly settling into life with me. I don’t think they mind how much I hurt them anymore. They don’t complain as much, but they still cry those same beautiful tears for me. I think they’re starting to enjoy it.

5/26/24 -

I have to go on an extended trip for a week soon because of work and I’m nervous. They said they’ll wait happily for me, but I’m still so, so nervous. However, earlier this month I was gone for a few days and they didn’t go anywhere. Dove actually welcomed me back happily. I think we’ll be okay. I think this is it, the true test. I know they’ll pass, but still, I can’t quiet the anxiety in my heart. I’ll have to spend as much time as possible with them and get out all my excitement before I have to leave. I’m going to miss the feeling of their skin beneath my fingers and teeth.

6/11/24 -

[This page has also been smeared and torn in anger. *Another fully corrected version will be at the bottom.]

I — FUCKING BE—VE THEY DI- TH— AG—!!! THEY R— AW—!! THE- STOL- SO MU— —IT FRO- ME!! THEY TO— THE MO—Y I HA- HIDDEN!!!! THE- TOOK FO— AN- CLO—— AN- LEFT!! I- SO FUCK—- ANGRY!!! I'LL K— THEM!!! I JUS- MIGH- FUCK— KIL- THEM!!! AT TH- VER- LEA— THEY— NEVE- WAL- AGAIN! WHEN I ———— NEVER ES— AGAIN! LOCKS, CA—S, CHA—S!! WHAT—— IT TAKES!!!!!!

Dove, you’d better pray to —y FUCKING DIETY in EXIST—— THAT I DON- FIN- —U!!! When I d-, you’re goin- to su——— much for do— th— to me.

--

6/08/23 -

I CANT FUCKING BELIEVE THIS!! DOVE WAS TRYING TO MOVE!! THEY WERE TRYING TO LEAVE ME!! THAT STUPID BASTARD [Redacted] TRIED TO TAKE THEM FROM ME! WHEN ALL IVE FUCKING DONE HERE IS PROTECT THEM AND THIS IS HOW THEY REPAY ME?!? I'VE NEVER BEEN SO ANGRY!!!

Dove is FUCKING LUCKY I had the home ready! If not, I would’ve just thrown them in the fucking basement!!! [Redacted] got what they deserved. I beat them so bad you can't even fucking recognize them. I’ll dump the body somewhere else.

6/11/24 -

I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE THEY DID THIS AGAIN!!! THEY RAN AWAY!! THEY STOLE SO MUCH SHIT FROM ME!! THEY TOOK THE MONEY I HAD HIDDEN!!!! THEY TOOK FOOD AND CLOTHES AND LEFT!! IM SO FUCKING ANGRY!!! I'LL KILL THEM!!! I JUST MIGHT FUCKING KILL THEM!!! AT THE VERY LEAST THEY'LL NEVER WALK AGAIN! WHEN I CATCH UP THEY WILL NEVER ESCAPE AGAIN! LOCKS, CAGES, CHAINS!! WHATEVER IT TAKES!!!!!!

Dove, you’d better pray to every FUCKING DIETY in EXISTENCE THAT I DON'T FIND YOU!!! When I do, you’re going to suffer so much for doing this to me.

[sissylittlefeather]

Kinktober Day 26: Blindfold

A Lovely Evening

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI, SMUT, MFF threesome

Word Count: ~2.8k

Kinktober Masterlist

“Greg, darling, I want to try something a little different tonight.” Bernice looks up at Greg through her eyelashes innocently. 

“What did you have in mind?” Greg asks offhandedly as he looks around the party at all the girls in their kitty cat outfits dispersed in the crowd of other beautiful women. 

“Greeeg.” Bernice whines, trying to get his attention. He finally looks down at her and smiles. 

“Yes, honey?” 

“I think we should find us a girl tonight.” She winks at him mischievously and his eyes widen. They've talked before about her desire to add another girl in the bedroom with them now that they've been together for a while. “I want to try out that blindfold we bought.”

She pouts and he nods, amused by her fascination with letting him be with another woman in her presence. He's definitely not opposed to the concept. He just thinks it's funny that she'd be so passionate about the idea. 

“Okay, honey, if that's what you want.” Denying her what she wants never really works in his favor anyway. 

“Can I pick her?” He nods. Why not?

“Sure, honey.”

******

You've been with Classic Cat magazine for almost two years now and you've already been a centerfold twice. You wander through the party with a tray of drinks and flirt with the few men present and hell, half the women too. Maybe you're not supposed to be attracted to the women, but you are, and it doesn't hurt anything to flirt a little. You've found that most girls will flirt with you even if they swear they're 100% straight. 

When you're not carrying drinks around, you sneak sips of champagne, so you've got a pretty decent buzz going by the time you approach what might be the most beautiful couple you've ever seen with your tray. 

“Drinks?” He shakes his head, looking you up and down quickly, but she takes one and gives you a dazzling smile. 

“Thank you, darling.”

“I love your hair. The color is just gorgeous!” She beams and then looks over at the man, who gives her an affirmative nod of some sort, before turning back to you.

“Oh, thank you, love! I'm Bernice and this is my husband, Greg.” She turns to him again. “Shake her hand, darling.” 

Greg takes your hand and kisses the back of it. He can tell that Bernice has chosen you, so he knows he'll have to lay on the charm pretty thick if he wants this to work. Your long legs and ass under your cat tail have him glad she's picked you and he's eager to make this happen. 

“I'm y/n. Has anyone ever told you how beautiful you both are?” Your drinks have made you bold, but Bernice giggles and Greg smiles genially. 

“Aren't you just the sweetest?” Bernice touches your arm lightly as she speaks and a shiver goes down your spine. She really is very pretty. Greg clears his throat and begins to speak. 

“Honey, we know this might be a bit unusual but-”

“We'd love for you to come home with us.” Bernice cuts him off and he looks at her, surprised that she interrupted him. She's more into this than he expected. 

“Oh…” You look between the two of them again and decide you don't have anything to lose. They're beautiful, you're horny, and you won't be young forever. 

“I would love to.” Greg is shocked at how easily you agree, completely missing the look that you share with Bernice. 

******

Their home is just as beautiful as they are. You compliment the place and Bernice takes both of your hands in hers and thanks you, leading you through the house. You all sit in the living room sipping cocktails to try to get acquainted. Greg watches the two of you together and realizes he's the only one who might be nervous about this as you and Bernice talk and flirt and touch each other easily. He also starts to wonder if this is more about Bernice than he originally thought. 

“Darling, you really are just gorgeous. Your eyes are so pretty. Aren't you cold in this outfit, though?” She strokes your shoulder and squeezes your upper arm. 

“Oh, I'm used to it. But you're sweet to ask.” You put a hand on her knee and she leans against you, turning to Greg. 

“Greg, darling, come keep our friend warm.” You can tell she definitely wears the pants in this relationship as he obediently comes and sits on your other side. 

“Would you like me to warm you up a bit, honey?” He asks, trying to act like it was his idea. 

“I wouldn't mind it.” You smile at him and he wraps his arms around you. Bernice slips her shoes off and tucks her feet up under her, leaning against the two of you. Without thinking, you put your arms around her and she turns her head and presses her lips to yours. She tastes sweet as she opens her mouth and deepens the kiss. You hear Greg inhale sharply as he watches the two of you with your tongues tangling together. This is not what he expected at all. She turns in your arms and presses herself to you and the kiss reaches a fever pitch as her hands begin to roam and you start pulling at her clothes. 

“Umm… ladies… maybe we'd all be more comfortable in the bedroom?” Greg asks tentatively, not quite sure what his role is here, since the two of you seem perfectly happy to pay attention to just each other. Bernice pulls back and nods. 

“Yes, let's get more comfortable.” She stands up and takes your hand. Greg holds his hand out to you and the three of you walk into their room. Once inside, Bernice walks to her night table and speaks over her shoulder to Greg. 

“Take your clothes off. Hers too.” He nods and begins to undress, stripping off his jacket and shirt and shoes. His hands go to the zipper on the back of your outfit. 

“Is this okay, honey?” You laugh. 

“Baby, I'm in your bedroom. You don't have to ask for permission. I've already said yes.” He chuckles and unzips your outfit, letting it fall to the floor. When he realizes that you weren't wearing anything under it, his eyes almost pop out of his head. 

“You thought there would be room for underwear underneath that?” You giggle and he kisses your shoulder. 

“I'm glad there wasn't.” He presses his lips to the back of your neck and you moan softly. You turn and pull him into a kiss and he settles a little, glad to be back into a participatory role. 

“Pants, darling.” Bernice says as she approaches the two of you, interrupting your kiss. She has a strip of black fabric in her hand. Greg obeys and removes his pants. He also wasn't wearing underwear, so his cock bounces free and the two of you stand in front of Bernice naked. She surprises both of you by going to you first and kissing you again. Greg watches wide-eyed as his dick twitches in his palm. When her hands move to your breasts, he decides to get involved,  coming up behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist, running one hand down to your center. He starts to make circles on your clit with his fingertip and you moan into Bernice's mouth. 

“Mmm, she likes that, darling. Look how hard her nipples are.” She pinches them gently between her thumb and forefinger and he looks down at you over your shoulder, groaning a little. You lean your head back against him as she moves her mouth down to lick and suck on your chest and he keeps up his movements on your sensitive bud. You feel an orgasm start to gather in your hips as he slips a finger up inside you. 

“She's about to cum, honey, I can feel it.” Greg whispers as your walls flutter around him. You whimper and grind your pussy against his hand. Bernice giggles and kisses you again. 

“Cum for us, darling.” She mumbles against your lips, reaching behind her back to unzip her own dress. You pull it down and off of her, unlatching her bra and pushing her panties down as quickly as you can. She presses her breasts against yours and Greg grunts.

“Goddamn it, that's...” When he realizes her pussy is so close to his hand where it touches you, he uses his forefinger to tease her clit as he pumps his middle finger in you and she moans pornographically into your mouth. Your hands run up and down her back, periodically taking a handful of her ass. Greg had no idea watching the two of you kiss and touch each other would turn him on so much, but his cock is rock hard against you and he can't get enough. 

“I'm… oh… I'm gonna cum…” You whine as he pulls his fingers out and goes back to dragging his fingertips across your clit. 

“Oh, I wanna feel it!” Bernice almost squeals, slipping two of her delicate fingers into your pussy. She pushes them in and out as Greg stimulates your sensitive button and your orgasm gets closer and closer. Finally, it explodes inside you and you shudder and pulse on both of them, cumming hard as the electric ecstasy rushes through you. When you finally come back down from your high, Bernice giggles and kisses you gently. You feel Greg's hot breath on your neck as his heart pounds and he can barely contain himself. He's ready to throw you both on the bed and fuck you silly, but he knows this is Bernice's show. 

“Did you enjoy that, darling?” She coos. You nod fervently and kiss her again and then move down her neck and chest. You go to get on your knees in front of her and she stops you. “It's time for this.”

She holds up the blindfold and you nod. At this point, you'll do anything she tells you to. Now you understand why Greg obeys her like he does. You close your eyes and prepare for her to blindfold you, but she doesn't. 

“Now, honey, what are you doin’?” You open your eyes and see her tying the strip of fabric on Greg. He has his lips pursed and his hands on his hips. “I thought this was for her?”

“Oh, darling, hush.” She leads him to lay down on the bed. Giggling, she turns to you and gestures for you to come over to her. 

“Just relax, Greg dear, and let us take care of you.” Once he's in position, she starts to run her hands over his body and you follow her lead and do the same. She gestures for you to touch his dick, so you move down and start to stroke him, sliding his foreskin back and forth. He moans loudly and bucks his hips into your hand. She begins to tease his nipples with her tongue and you lean forward and lick a circle around the head of his cock. 

“Fuck. That's… I don't know which… honey that's amazing.” You and Bernice both giggle. He can't tell who is touching him where, but he's obviously enjoying it. Bernice kisses down his stomach and then keeps going to suck his balls into her mouth. He groans loudly and then she holds his cock in her hand as you both lick up each side. Your tongues touch as you drag them around his member like it's an ice cream cone. 

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” Greg slams his hand on the bed and grits his teeth. He can feel both of you as Bernice pays attention to his shaft, holding his foreskin back for you to give him soft kitten licks on the head of his cock. You start to bounce your mouth up and down on him, opening your throat to take him as deeply as you can and he whimpers. As you work, Bernice climbs back up his body and onto his face. “Which… honey?”

“Don't worry. Just lick!” Bernice giggles and he pokes his tongue into her pussy, holding her thighs in his hands. She moans and rubs her center against his lips, chasing her high as you use your hand and your mouth to bring him as close to an orgasm as you can. He makes some kind of sound and she gasps, reaching back to grab your hair. 

“Stop, darling, we don't want him to cum yet.” You obey, pulling off quickly. She backs away from his face and slides backwards to situate herself on his cock. She puts a finger on her lips to indicate you should keep quiet and then guides you to position your hips over his mouth, facing her.

“Can I take this off y- oh. What?” Greg can feel her as she sinks down onto him, but he can also feel how close your pussy is to his face. 

“Just lick, darling.” You say, trying to mimic Bernice's baby-sweet voice. She kisses you deeply as he starts to eat your pussy, running his tongue over and around your clit. 

“Oh my god.” You moan in your regular voice and press your forehead against Bernice's. He knows it's you now by the difference in taste and he'd recognize Bernice's pussy on his cock any day. 

“He's so good at it, isn't he?” She smiles at you as she begins to roll her hips against his. He groans into you and you whimper. Bernice moans softly. “How does she taste, darling?” 

He pulls back off of you a little to respond. 

“So sweet, honey. She tastes amazing.” She looks at you mischievously with her eyes sparkling and then moves you off of him. Luckily their bed is huge, because she lays you down next to him and then settles herself between your thighs. She starts out pumping Greg's cock as she begins to lick your pussy, but quickly becomes distracted by her tongue on your clit and stops what she's doing to him. Your back arches as she presses her tongue into your slit over and again before settling back up at the top, giving special attention to your hardened bud. A moan escapes your lips as a second orgasm starts to build in your stomach. 

“Umm… girls?” Greg asks, having been completely forgotten as Bernice laps at your pussy and you focus on the climax that threatens to overwhelm you at any second. He lifts the blindfold and almost cums immediately when he sees the two of you, her between your legs and you gasping and whimpering underneath her. He's never seen anything so erotic in his entire life. His hand goes directly to his dick and he starts to pump himself frantically, desperately enjoying the scene in front of him. 

“No, Greg darling, come here.” She backs off of you and moves him to be in between your hips as she arranges herself over your face. “Are you on the pill, love?” 

“Yes, I am.” You nod and she smiles down at you. 

“Good girl.” She pats your cheek and then nods to Greg, lowering her pussy to your mouth. You moan into her as he enters you and begins to fuck you with a steady rhythm. He pounds you as you lick her like your life depends on it. 

“Oh, darling, I almost wish you had a pussy so you could feel how good she is at this.” Bernice whimpers to Greg. 

“I wish you could feel how good her pussy is like this.” He moans in response. They kiss each other on top of you and you're so close to a climax that it almost hurts. “I'm gonna cum, honey.”

“Me too, darling, oh!” Bernice throws her head back and grinds into your lips as she cums on your tongue, sending you over the edge to throb and pulse on Greg's cock, which is enough to push him into his release as well, as he shudders and fills you with his warmth. The three of you rock and groan together as you ride out your highs. 

At the end of it, you lay on the bed together all tangled in each other. You’re in the middle, with your head on Greg's shoulder as Bernice is wrapped around you. All of you are sweating and trying to catch your breath. 

“That was… wow.” Greg is speechless as he looks up at the ceiling, replaying it in his mind.

You lay there satisfied and spent. Glad that you said yes when they asked.  

“Thank you, darling…” Bernice coos, stroking your arm gently, “for a lovely evening.”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Taglist:

@ccab @atleastpleasetelephone @deltafalax @msamarican @angschrof @lustnhim @jhoneybees @polksaladava @searchingforgravity @librababe99 @hooked-on-elvis @theelvisprincess @makethemorning @your-nanas-house @peaceloveelvis @mrspresley69

[coolberry-black]

Let me hold you (Worst Wolverine x Bartender Reader) Pt.1

Heyy, so this is my first post. Just a heads up, English is not my first language so let me know if you see any mistakes.

I plan on having 2 or 3 parts of this, and I hope you enjoy!!

word count: 3.3k

Warnings: age-gap, reader is 26, slight daddy issues, height and size difference

Reader is a bartender, and Wade's neighbor. Logan had wanted to meet her for a long time, but thinks he's too old for a 20-something year old like her. Little does he know, she's had a crush on him for a long time...

Logan, after moving in with Wade, kinda got used to his new life. The comments from the annoying asshole never stopped, as well as the grunty responds from the other. He didn’t want to make friends - he’s gonna lose them anyway.

But as soon as he laid eyes on you in the hallway of their flat, he couldn’t help but let them linger for a moment.

It was bad, sinful, even. You were a much too young, pretty thing for an old, grumpy man like him. Every afternoon, when you got ready for work, he heard you. He heard your lock close as you hurried down the stairs. He didn’t know what your job was exactly - he only knew that you came back home when the sun was already caressing the horizon. And when he went out for a smoke, he could still smell your delicious perfume in the staircase.

He felt like a pervert for enjoying the sight of your swaying hips, for wanting to talk to you, get to know you - what would a young girl like you do with him?

After another tiring morning with Wade fucking Wilson, he decided it’s time to clear his head. But the smoke wasn’t enough, he needed something to drink.

He quickly escaped the apartment, locking the door behind him. He breathed in deeply, closing his eyes as he could still smell you. You left thirty minutes ago - just enough time for your scent to leave the hallways, but it still lingered there, not just near your apartment, but in his mind as well.

“For fuck’s sake” he whispered, putting his hands in the pockets of his jacket, hurrying down the stairs. He walked and walked in frustration, but finally found a bar a bit further from the flat, and as he could tell from outside, a quiet little pub with few people, just what he needed.

Not expecting much to happen, he, without looking around much, stepped into the place, the door closing behind him with a loud thud. He sat down on one of the bar stools, ran a hand through his messy hair, and rubbed his tired eyes.

“Rough day?” a familiar voice asked, and Logan raised his head in an instant. Then, the scent hit him - a hint of rose and something sweet, youthful. It was you. His eyes looked surprised, really not expecting to see you, especially you here.

“Had a few, yeah.” he replied in a nonchalant voice after a few passing seconds, looking in your eyes, hoping you hadn’t noticed him looking up and down your body. You wore some dark blue jeans and a black tank top - not much, but the way it hugged your curves made him feel things that he thought were long gone.

“What can I get you?” you turned to Logan with a small, soft smile, with a kind glint in your eyes. The man was taken aback by the sweet and lovely look in them, as well as your angelic voice, speaking to him in a soft tone he wasn’t used to. From the way you were looking at him, he thought you probably didn’t realize you were his next door neighbor. Which he didn’t mind, but felt an unfamiliar, sharp sting in his chest as he pondered if you would even care.

“Just a glass of whiskey.” he replied, his voice low, but much more soft than the voice he ever used with anyone. You nodded, and turned around to make his drink. His mind wandered; what would you do if he said something flirty? Would those adorable cheeks blush with embarrassment, or would you be completely disgusted by him? Or maybe… would you flirt back? He moved around in his seat, trying to get his mind off the thought.

“Here you go.” you slid him the drink on the cold, dark countertop, and then look around to see if you needed to do more around the pub. You quickly grabbed a napkin, and started cleaning up - but couldn’t help staring at the man in front of you.

He was just looking at the glass in his hand, not yet taking a sip. His features looked angry, tired - not physically, but mentally. Like he’s had enough of everything life had to offer.

“You okay?” you ask, finally giving in to the urge to talk to the mysterious man. He looked up, but avoided your gaze as he downed the amber colored beverage in one go.

“I don’t remember asking for a therapy session with my drink” his voice sounded throaty and rejecting, pushing away the thought of you.

“It’s on the house.” you grinned, and then looked around, supporting yourself on the countertop “Everyone’s had a rough couple of years, and sometimes all you need is a stranger to talk to.” he looked at you with a strange, ‘are-you-kidding-me’ look on his face, then put the glass down, curiosity plaguing his mind.

“Why do you care? Don’t you have your own shit to take care of?”

You shot him a knowing look, not seeming offended by his rude words. You lean closer, and point at a man in the corner. The guy with grayish, short hair and a bulky body looked at only one point, his mind clearly elsewhere.

“That guy” you started “lost his daughter after the Blip. One moment, everything was fine - living a family life with a beautiful wife and a kid. The next thing he knows, five years passed, and the wife married someone else. He tried to find his daughter, only to realize that she got sick and died three years ago.” you stopped for a moment, feeling sad at the thought of someone losing their life like that. If a child lost their parents, they became an orphan - but there was no word, no explanation for the pain of losing your own child “When the dad wasn’t here, they didn’t have money for the cancer treatment. Since then, he sat in the same spot, every night.”

Logan thought to himself for a few moments. Now, knowing his story, he saw the sadness, the loss in the man’s eyes, he saw the way his eyebags ran deep under his eyes, he saw him absentmindedly tapping the glass in front of him, the cigarette in his other hand long burning to ash.

“That still doesn’t answer my question.”

“Look, I just want to be nice. Sometimes, you can get things off your chest and a stranger, like me, won’t judge you for it.” you turned around to help another customer sitting in a box, leaving him with his thoughts. Even though he still felt weird about telling someone his story, maybe you were right. Maybe it would take a big weight off his chest. And you looked like you would be easy to talk to.

When you came back to take a sip of your water, he stared at you for a few moments. Now, he felt a bit guilty for being such a prick.

“Hey” he called to you, and waited till you reached the counter “Can I…?”

“Have another one? “ you finished his sentence, and he nodded, shooting you an appreciated look. You smiled back softly, and got some ice out of it’s container “Is Wade tiring you out too much?“ you ask, your voice cheeky and a half smile playing at your lips as you looked at him.

He gazed at you surprised, and then sighing as he looked at the counter. So you did recognize him. “More than you can imagine. That fucker talks all day.”

“Went down once to the laundromat. He started talking about a movie and didn’t stop until I slammed the door in his face. But, he’s a good guy.” You said, giggling to yourself, and Logan couldn’t help but find that sound adorable. You suddenly stretched your hand out in front of him, waiting for a handshake “I’m Y/N, by the way”

He tried to hide the grin at the corner of his mouth as he grabbed your hand gently and gave it a small shake. He was still very much aware of how much stronger he was than an average human, his mutant genes giving him superhuman strength “Logan”

“Well, it’s nice meeting you Logan” your smile grew bigger, and his heart almost clenched at the sound of his name from your mouth. He tried to brush away the thought of you, saying his name quite differently, in the dark of the night, gasping and closing your eyes in pleasure… No.

“Yeah, you too. How long have you been working here?” he asks, surprised himself that he somehow cares.

“Since the Blip. Lost the job I had before, and this was available. The pay isn’t too bad, especially ‘cause rent is a lot less” you answer while cleaning a glass, wiping the water away with a towel. “What do you do for work, cowboy?” you ask playfully, looking at his straight cut jeans and the leather belt, the point of his cowboy-like boot just showing. He adjusted his flannel shirt, smiling at the nickname for a moment.

“I… I do construction work. It’s better than nothin’, I guess.”

“Hm, that’s cool. Sorry, I have to ask. Are you Canadian?” you ask, getting relaxed in the conversation. He looks at you, the corners of his eyes smiling at you.

“Is my accent that noticeable?”

“Maybe, but it’s nice. It’s a change for once, I like it.” you say, almost in a flirtatious tone. You couldn’t help but stare at his broad shoulders, his trained arms and the way his chest fell and rose with each breath. His tall frame would have intimidated you if he was standing in front of you, but it was also hella attractive. Before he came into the pub, before your first words to each other, you only met in the hallways of your flat. Even there, when you caught a glimpse of him arriving- or leaving from home, you watched him, afraid to start a conversation, but wondering what his voice sounded like, what color his eyes were.

“Looks like to me this world changed a lot since that… that Blip.” he said, trying to find the words. His voice quickly woke you from your staring, making you blush as you realized that maybe ogling at him was too much.

You talked almost all night, you sometimes going back to your work when someone needed a drink, but soon, as the day came to an end, it was only the two of you left in the pub. You laughed, talked, and felt amazing. Somehow, it was so easy to talk to him, and he relaxed too. Hell, even you drank a few shots after you cleaned up.

And he had a nice time, too. You listened, and he finally felt heard. You laughed at his jokes, and the thought that his flirting skills were rusty and needed some polishing were long out of his mind.

“You know, it’s been a really long time since I could talk to someone like this.” you stated, looking into his eyes deeply. Now, that you two were alone, you paid all your attention to him. You saw that his green eyes had some brown in the middle of them, and the dim lighting of the bar made it look like they were darker, much more mysterious.

“You’re not alone. I don’t think I had this much fun with someone in a while” he smiled back, his features looking much less tired than before. He saw the blush creeping up your cheeks, and he found it adorable. He wondered if you always blushed like this, and if your eyes always had that lovely glint in them.

You stared at each other for a while, the tension rising between the two of you. The air got thick, and both of you felt that something changed. It wasn’t just fun anymore, you felt your skin getting hot under his experienced gaze. You knew he was much older than you, and even if it was wrong, you’d be lying if you said it it didn’t make your stomach tingle with excitement. You supported your head on the countertop, leaning it to the side. Your neck exposed in front of him, Logan cleared his throat, his gaze catching a glimpse of the delicious curve of your jaw, your shoulders, your collarbone. He wasn’t used to this. You looked so… soft, unlike him. You looked like you would break if he touched you, and that made him want you even more. Was it wrong that he thought about you this way? Your eyes said the same thing he felt, and it made him crazy. Your lustful gaze piercing through him made his pants tighter.

“Logan?” you called out to him, finally breaking the silence. A shiver went through him at the sound if his name from your mouth, but he looked at you with a serious expression.

“Yes, sweetheart?” the nickname fell naturally from his lips, and thankfully he didn’t seem to notice the stunned reaction from you, as you looked away in embarrassment.

“I need to close soon, so… I think we have to call it a night.” you say, your tone almost sad. He looks at the door, and then back at you.

“I’ll wait for you outside. Girls like you shouldn’t walk alone in the middle of the night” He says, a small grin in the corner of his mouth. You blush at his words, you have to give him that he knows how to take a girl off her feet.

After everything is cleaned up, the lights are off, and you make your way to the door to close it with your key. The chilly night air hit your face as you breathed in deeply, looking at Logan from the corner of your eyes. In the street lights, you could see a few gray hairs shine in his hair, you could see th way he was so much taller than you… You swore you’ve never seen a more attractive man before. His eyes finally met yours, and smiled at you. The nighttime fit him perfectly - the moon shone bright above you, and he looked at you more softly than ever.

“By the way… I… don’t wanna pry, but… Wade told me a few things about you. I couldn’t get much out of his rambling, but… you’re like him, aren’t you?” you ask, and he turns to you, waiting for the disgusted look on your face. The word mutant echoed through his head, the hatred and fear his kind had to endure from humans making his heart heavy. He nods with a bitter look on his face. He knows that you are gonna hate him, and he doesn’t even want to look in your eyes, but he turns to you anyway…

And as he looks at you, he can’t see anything else, but curiosity and care. He’s almost stunned. You don’t hate him? You don’t want to push him away? Your fingers brush against his, and he initially wants to pull away, but doesn’t move his hand. Your gentle, small touch seems to ignite something in him, even if it’s not much: hope.

Your eyes told him everything he needs to know, but if it wasn’t enough, you quietly say “Logan… It doesn’t matter if you are. I just want to know you, and nothing can make me think differently about you, alright?”

“Yeah, I… Thank you.” he says, his own words surprising him, but he doesn’t correct himself. You walk silently next to each other, and you wonder if it’s too much if you ask more about it. He somehow sees that your silence has nothing to do with the fact that he is a mutant, but it is much more about wanting to know more but being afraid to ask. “You wanna see?” he asks in a low tone, looking at you from the side, and seeing your eyes light up. Somehow, he felt safe enough with you. He wanted you to know him. To really know him, every wicked and rough part of him that he hid from the world. It already felt like you’ve known him for months.

He stopped on the sidewalk, looking around to see if anyone was roaming the streets this late. When he saw that there was no danger near you, he looks at you with a serious expression, and then after a few moments of silence, still asks “Are you sure? I don’t want you to get scared, bub.”

“I’m sure. I want to see you.” you reply, and after a moment or two, three shiny, nine-inch razor sharp claws spring from his right hand in between his knuckles. You gasp and take a small step back, but then curiously stretch your hand towards it. You caress the flat side of it, feeling the cold, smooth surface under your fingers. You have so many questions, so many things you want to know about him. “Does it…hurt?” You ask, concern noticeable in your voice as you take his hand in yours. He wants to pull away, afraid that the smallest cut of those weapons could hurt you.

“I’m used to it by now.” he says, and even though the word ‘yes’ never left his mouth, the positive answer to the question still lingers in the air. You turn his hand around, your finger lightly caressing the middle of his palm. His nerves stand on end, and he quickly retracts his claws to not cause any harm. The gentle touch of your hand almost makes him shiver, and you didn’t even realize the effect you have on him.

As soon as he pulls his claws back, you turn his hand to see the wounds, but you stand there, stunned. There is nothing, his hand is… as smooth as if nothing had pierced it just now. A moment later you realize, you’ve seen Wade regenerate limbs a thousand times, it must be much easier with a scar.

“Logan…” you begin, and even though he’s starting to trust you, he’s still waiting for you to be scared, to be taken aback by something like *him “*This is… I’ve never seen anything like this… it’s so cool!” you say excitedly, almost like a kid. The glint in your eyes almost melts his heart away, he finds you adorable as you talk on and on about how you feel about him and how you always liked superheros. He can’t help but listen, and just smile at how cute you sound.

The rest of the way, you talked, and you got to know even more about each other. As if not just a day had passed, it felt like you understood everything about him now. And he didn’t say much about his past, just that he’s from somewhere else, far away… From the pain in his voice, you realized that it was enough about personal questions from your side today.

When you reached your door, you turned to him, and looked up into his eyes “I’ve had… a lot of fun tonight. Thank you.”

He stared at you with a half-smile, his eyes piercing right through you “Me too, sweetheart. We could… repeat it sometime, if you’d like.”

You blushed at his words, and reached for his hand, gently holding his index finger in your much smaller hand “I’d love that, yeah…Goodnight, Logan” you, without a second thought, stood on your tip-toes to reach him, and pressed a kiss on his cheek, and he stood there, stunned, as you opened your door, and with a soft look and a wave of your hand, disappeared behind it.

He touched his cheek, confused, and an unfamiliar, but very pleasant feeling spread in his chest. He stayed there for a few moments, still repeating everything that happened that night. And his grumpy heart may have been a bit lighter to carry.

As you close your door, you almost jump with happiness. You take your coat off and hop on your bed excitedly as you replay everything that happened, your heart floating and your mind foggy with pink clouds. And, maybe it was too soon to say, but you really, really fell in love.

I hope you guys enjoyed it, thanks for reading, byeeee!!!

[lostbetweenvampiresandmusic]

If you're still taking requests, 26 & 29 With David, please ❤️

26. Where am i?

29. I'm going to regret inviting you in, aren't I?

I hope you like it!

------------------------

I closed my eyes in annoyance as a loud motorcycle raced past my house, ignoring the fact that it was nearing one in the morning. I already had trouble sleeping, and ever since the summer weather really decided to set through, it was only becoming more difficult.

The motorcycle drove past again. I sighed, getting up to close my window when suddenly the noise stopped. I waited for a moment, then shrugged. Clearly the midnight drive was over. I turned around, ready to step into my bed, when I heard a knock on my window.

I froze.

My bedroom was on the third floor. No one knocked on my window. Ever. I wasn't sure what to do. Stay here like this, pretending I didn't hear it? Turn around and see what had caused it? Maybe, I thought to myself, maybe I was just scaring myself. Maybe it was a branch hitting the glass, or maybe a bird dropped a snail right into my window? Who knew.

I shook my head. I knew. There wasn't any tree growing anywhere near my window, and the chances of a bird flying this late at night? Surely, the local owls wouldn't feed on snails if they could catch a mouse or a ferret or something. No, the knock definitely came from my window.

Tick tick

It was there again, sharp and demanding this time. I took a deep breath, reaching for the metal candelabra standing on my bedside table as I turned around.

Outside my window was a young man. Clad in black, a mean boyish face - suddenly I realised I knew exactly who this was. I hadn't personally met him before, but everyone knew his face. David. The unofficial leader of the boardwalk at night.

I shivered. It was never a good thing if he singled you out.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, my voice a bit more shaky than I would have liked.

"I don't know."

"You don't know?"

He shook his head. "Can you let me in?"

"Why?" I looked at him suspiciously.

"I want to come inside."

"With what purpose, David? What are you doing here?"

"You know me, then." He nodded to himself.

I frowned. That was odd, right? I sighed deeply, ignoring the uneasy feeling inside my stomach as I walked closer towards my window.

"I'm going to regret inviting you in, aren't I?"

David shrugged.

"Fine. You can come in."

As quick as lightning, the man moved, climbing - or rather flying, although I still don't necessarily believe what I'd seen - into my bedroom, sitting down upon my bed.

"Where am I?" He asked.

"You don't know?" I eyed him suspiciously, realising by the blank look on his face that he probably didn't. "Did you hit your head? Do you remember how you got here?"

"Driving."

"Well, you're in Santa Carla. I guess it was you on that motorcycle, although I have no idea if you crashed it or not. I think I would have heard that, you know? Anyways, ehm -" I looked at him, seeing a lack of any head wound, "I think it's best if we go out and find your friends. They know where you live and can help you better than I can."

"So you don't know me?"

"Not really. I mean, almost everybody in town knows who you are."

"I'm famous?"

"More like infamous," I decided as I put some shoes on, leading David down the stairs and into my car. This whole situation felt like a fever dream. The way he acted, more innocent than anyone had ever seen. As if he truly didn't know who he was or where he was.

"So, ehm, just so I can tell your friends what happened, do you know what day it is?"

David shrugged.

"The year?"

"Stopped counting in the sixties."

I frowned. He seemed twenty at most, so did this mean he just never knew or always forgot? It was weird, that's for certain.

"Anywhere I can find your friends?"

David shrugged again, not saying anything. Instead, he kept looking at my neck. I felt my blood rush to my face, felt his hand trace the artery in my neck. I shivered.

"You have sweet blood."

I pushed the brake, stopping the car as I looked at him. "I don't care. You are either keeping up a perfect act of amnesia, and you need some help," I said with a panicky undertone, "or you're messing with me for some reason. I don't care either way, I want you out of my car."

"Why, darlin', am I not good company?"

"Nope. Absolutely not."

David chuckled, and in that instance, I knew I was right. He had been playing me all night. But why? I looked at him as he stepped out of my car, a sly, satisfied grin on his face. I kept looking as he walked away, lighting a cigarette. When he was about seven feet away, he turned to face me, his eyes bright orange, his teeth sharp and deadly, his face morphed into a monstrous mask. I screamed.

I drove off as fast as I could. Once at home, I locked the car, ran inside and locked the doors, locked my windows - until a small voice in the back of my head told me I had invited him in. A sudden dread washed over me as i heard a howling laughter outside, as I heard him calling out. The dread spread inside me, growing larger and larger as I heard him come closer. As I heard his friends laugh. As I heard the click of the lock, and the door open.

[sadlynojellybeans]

So I am re-reading TOA and i have decided to write some things i noticed now that I know what is going to happen next.

THE HIDDEN ORACLE

Meg was about do develop a crush on Percy, and Apollo noticed. It was immediatly curbed by Percy mentioning his girlfriend. He did not even notice XD

Apollo actually got out of the three legged death race unscathed O.o Scared to death but unharmed

Lester is being surprisingly not pathetic??? I mean, he can't remember shit and has the constutution of a limp noodle, but he has not fainted in several chapters!!! Maybe it's because Camp Half Blood is a relatively safe space for them...

THE FORESHADOWING IN CHAPTER 26 IS DEVASTATING - he gets confirmation it is the emperors behind everything and he thinks "i would have rather tangled with Tartarus or Ouranos or Primordial Chaos" APOLLO PLEASE

Speaking of foreshadowing, Rhea?!??!? "Find your center. Enlightenment has to come from within" HELLO??!?!??

Apollo mentioning he caused an earthquake that wiped out most of Sparta and that he never liked the Spartans much??? What about HYACINTHUS???????

"I busted out some footwork the Nine Muses and I had been working on" please I want so bad to see Apollo dance. Especially Apollo as Lester

Apollo being absolutely convinced that he will never have a proper partner is tragic. "It was not in my destiny" bro

The Germani appear and the absolute first thing Apollo does is move in front of Meg. "Instinctively". This is the same guy that at the beginning of the book was evaluating which demigods would be best to keep on hand to throw at quests. I can't. Just how much exactly did he repress his protective instincts through the years and centuries?

I find so fascinating that Apollo wants to strike Nero down immediately after meeting him. Like, yes. Apollo is a god. And he would not allow anyone to threaten what he cares about. Even after his trials, he might be kinder and more attentive to demigods, but I think that anybody who crosses him (really crosses him) will have to start praying for mercy.

If there is one thing I can say about TOA is that it is certainly expanding my musical horizons, with all the songs I have to check out on youtube just to have an idea of what Apollo is singing about.

He did not suck during the confrontation with Nero?! Burst of godly strength saved the day and his dignity

"Just because she had lied about being my friend did not mean I wasn't hers. She was in danger. I was not going to leave her" man. He cares so fucking much. No wonder he never let anybody get close to him in the last years.

Didn't they say a sonnet was worse than a limerick in the next book?

"BLESS HIS CONNIVING LITTLE HEART". "Children of Hermes cannot rap". "[Cecil] was demoted to dancer" skjsjskansnkzbsnsmmsnzm

It's kind of ... sad? How happy Apollo is when flying on the giant ants. He is used to being a god who can fly whenever he wants, and a part of him is usually in the sky every day as he drives the sun chariot. And instead he has been stranded on earth, away from what is both his duty and something he greatly enjoys. "It felt so good to fly again. [...] For two or three seconds I was exhilarated".

AND THE ARROW OF DODONA IS FINALLY HERE AND TALKING FRIENDS!!!!

I cannot believe I am so happy because of a talking arrow

The arrow QUIVERED kjsnsksjsnsnzjxndnsk i love them so much

Not Apollo asking where Jason Grace is 💀

I genuinely cannot understand if this is foreshadowing or really lucky wording on Riordan's part. Rachel asks about Meg and Apollo thinks "She might as well have plunged the Arrow of Dodona into my chest". RICK. RICK DID YOU KNOW? HAD YOU ALREADY THOUGTH ABOUT THAT SCENE IN TBM OR WAS IT PURE CHANCE????

WE WERE ROBBED. I have been wondering for a few days if in TOA we ever see Apollo sing for fun (not to confuse enemies, not to open doors, not for any practical purpose. Just for the fun of it). The depressing answer seems to be no, although I might have forgotten. At the end of THO it is implied that Apollo, Leo and Calypso join the sing-along at CHB, but the fact that the books end before we actually see him sing is a travesty.

[silviakundera]

The Princess Royal ep 25 and ep 26 comments

I like that they gave us a lil preview of PWX's issues by including a scene where he explicitly worries about THE SRQ (her quasi boyfriend) being back with them -- because it ends on him self-soothing to himself that she's his wife. That's what he would tell himself in Life 1, that SRQ couldn't ever truly possess her because she was his wife. (I believe hot 40s PWX hallucination said something similar back in the bath scene.)

This is why he's so triggered by the idea of a divorce while she isn't as freaked out, because the emotional part is what's hard for her. She doesn't need to marriage arranged by the emperor to be united hearts. But to PWX, this was the one thing he had with Li Rong. The way he could keep her.

It's honestly such a perfect conflict for them to have, digging straight into the knot PWX still has in his heart. She's been reassuring him in this episode so far and now the lady with massive trust issues is confidently saying that they can just get divorced but not treat it as real, "our feelings aren't something a marriage contract can decide." But she isn't really hearing him any more than he's hearing her.

Indeed they toned down the argument from the novel. I thought this would happen, because the screenwriter seems scared to really let them be harsh to each other.

"Yes." Li Rong spoke decisively, "But this divorce is a sham. When the future is complete, we will marry again."

"Has Your Highness ever thought," Pei Wenxuan spoke calmly, "that after you and I are divorced, if I have someone else in mind, what will happen to Your Highness?"

Li Rong froze, and after a moment, she forced a smile: "If ...... you have someone else in mind, just let me know."

Li Rong squeezed her fan and restrained her emotions, "I am not an unreasonable person. No one should be tied to anyone for life, if you have someone else in mind ...... then ...... that's why you don't come back."

Both of them are taking turns stabbing each other in this conversation and just need a thousand hugs.

"I was reluctant to [divorce] because I cared about the relationship, and I wouldn't have given up even a little to the powers that be to do so. But you did not hesitate, you did not even think of any other way. You said to me before that if one is sincere, one should show respect. But when it comes to such a choice, Li Rong, you have never hesitated to choose power."   As Li Rong listened to these words, she felt as if she had been pressed into the water by Pei Wenxuan.   All around her was slow and quiet, and her whole body was soaked in water, struggling and unable to breathe.   She listened to Pei Wenxuan's words like the last ten years of her last life, when he scolded her again and again, "Li Rong, you're simply black-hearted and snake-hearted."

And Li Chuan would also ask her after the occasional drink, holding his glass of wine if he could, "Eldest Princess, do you think that if I were not His Majesty, I would still be your brother?"   She didn't care before, she could scold him wantonly, even tell him outright and openly, "Yes, I am such a poisonous woman with a snake's heart and a black heart and a rotten liver, what's wrong with that?   She could have smiled at Li Chuan and changed the subject as if she didn't understand, and simply said, "Your Highness is joking."   She thought she was used to it.   But in this life, when she got along with Pei Wenxuan as a new Li Rong, when she got a sincere "sister" from Li Chuan, when she got a solemn "I'll wait for you" from Pei Wenxuan, she felt that there was finally light in her life, light that washed away her mud and made her look up, and she began to yearn for those thoughts that had long been drowned in the palace and that she should not have had.   Because she had seen the sunlight, she felt a pain that she had never felt before come up as someone pressed her into the water once more.   She listened quietly to Pei Wenxuan's words.   He said, "The Li Rong I want, the Li Rong who is worthy of my watch, should not be like this."   Li Rong laughed as she listened, and she did not echo, did not answer.   She twirled a chess piece as if nothing had happened and only said, "I am only making a suggestion, accept it if you want to, I don't care if you don't want to be an official anymore, if you want to go and die and be pressed to the ground by Su Rongqing."    "How much do you think I care about you?" Li Rong placed the chess pieces on the chessboard and let out a low and mute voice, "If you are useless, it doesn't matter to me if you go to your death."   When Pei Wenxuan heard these words, he knew that they were Li Rong's words of anger.   If Li Rong was angry, she could say anything she wanted to say. He knew that, but he still felt pain.   It was because he had spent so much time with Li Rong that he had forgotten how painful it could be if this person dug into his heart.

Anyway, we got the unsent letters! And my man got his Xie Wei moment lol.

The return of Cui Yulang!!! My bro!! 👏👏

PWX, who has traveled back 20 years in time to be reunited with the love of his life: Wishing on lanterns, a ridiculous superstition

I really love how unhinged these two are, to be baby making & divorcing at the same time 😂😭

Am I disappointed they cut the sex scene? (which is very different from the kiss-fighting scene, do not fear) eh, I expected that tbh. But screenwriter, perhaps at least let the audience know they are banging on the regular now?

my body is ready for the horny divorce era!!! Please censors, let have us something 😭

Still do not like the change of making SRQ think he has a chance with LR. 🤔🤔 He was never that delu in the novel, and only proposed to her that one time as a lifeline when it looked like she'd gambled & lost. why would he even think this is possible?? He's canonically very smart, though deeply classist. Come 'ere screenwriter, I just want to talk?

But thanks for including the ominous SRQ line, "Then he deserves to die. Anyone who lets the princess down, deserves to die." The actor actually made an effort to look intense. #youtried

Immediately figuring out how Li Rong had clowned him again and acknowledging defeat, then setting fire to the Remonstration Office is as interesting as he's ever been. Finally we see someone worthy of being our princess' old aquaintance.

(but I really wanna be in his head during the audience with the emperor: I burned down a government office and you're murdering witnesses already?! damn girl, we're gonna tear this country apart 💀)

Onto Round 3, we are:

Li Rong: 2

Su Rongqing: 0

[justagalwhowrites]

Lavender - Ch. 26

A trip outside the QZ turns dangerous. A continuation of Lavender Ch. 1-25 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Injuries from canon-typical violence. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI, 18+ only.

Length: 5.2k

Tuesday, June 6, 2023 - Two Years Later

“I’m not doing this with you again, Joel,” Tess snapped, staring him down from across the table. “I’m not letting your obsession…” 

“It’s not fucking safe, Tess,” he cut her off. “When was the last time we went out and didn’t run into raiders? Last two months have been especially bad…” 

“You think it’s safe for you and me but not safe for her?” She demanded.

“No, it’s not safe for anyone,” he snapped back. “But you I trust to actually kill someone, you can take care of yourself. Who knows what the fuck she would do if she gets picked up by fuckin’ raiders…” 

“Who knows what you would do if she gets picked up by fucking raiders, that’s what you mean,” she knocked back the rest of her drink. “I’m done with this shit, I’m done with your paranoia around Doc dictating our goddamn operation…” 

“When have I ever dictated a damn thing about our operation?” His jaw clenched. 

“How about when you told your brother, our partner, to leave town without consulting me because she got hurt?” She said. “Or when you killed not one but fucking two FEDRA guards in the QZ because you saw them as a threat…” 

“They were a fucking threat!” 

“Not to mention the time you made the call to leave me in the QZ when you took her outside the first time,” she snapped. “Even though you knew you’re a goddamn liability where she’s concerned! You need to get over this woman who you’ve had nothing to do with in damn near 15 years, Joel! She’s done with you, you need to be done with her. Fucking leave it.”

She went to leave but he followed her. 

“You take her out there and I’m not goin’,” he said. “End of story.” 

“Tell me what the fuck it is you want, Joel!” She yelled. “Because it sure seems like you don’t want to be anything to anyone. You didn’t want anything with me! It sure seemed like you could have had whatever you wanted with her and you didn’t take it and now you’re doing this and I don’t fucking understand you! Do you really think she’s just going to accept us not bringing her out anymore? That she’ll just listen to whatever the hell it is you tell her? Because you’ve got a funny taste in women if that’s what you’re after…” 

“She isn’t one of us, she doesn’t have to know when we go out!” He yelled. “No one says we have to involve her in shit, Tess…” 

“And when she asks?” She demanded. “When we need more medical gear?” 

“We bring Andrew out,” he said. Tess stood there for a moment, just blinking at him. “He talked to me few weeks back. Wanted me to consider bringing him instead of her, he’s worried too. He’s heard shit from other smugglers and guards about what it’s like out there. He’ll go, she’ll still get what she’s after and he will actually fucking look out for himself. Besides, the chances of raiders trying to grab him are a whole hell of a lot lower than with her.” 

“His wife know about this plan?” Tess asked, a bit calmer now. 

Joel shrugged. 

“Not my business.” 

She looked at him, shaking her head. 

“You better pray nothing happens to him,” she said. “Because if it does and she finds out it was your doing…” 

Joel shrugged again. 

“Long as she’s alive to hate me?” He said. “I don’t give a shit.” 

Tess sighed. 

“Fine,” she said, resigned. “Talk to Andrew. Tell Doc, don’t tell Doc, whatever. I’m done trying to make sense of your shit with her.” 

She stalked toward the door. 

“Going to the Speakeasy,” she said. “Appreciate it if you didn’t join.” 

Joel sighed. He could hardly blame Tess, not when she was right. He poured himself more whiskey. He’d never been able to find a balance he felt like he could survive with you. There was so close that it felt like he was on the edge of a cliff and gravity was winning. The feeling that he was inches from destruction. But then there was so far that felt like he was stretching and reaching, part of him always trying to get to you. It didn’t matter what else it strained, what else it hurt, there was the constant pull toward you. There was no middle ground. There was either too close or not close enough. 

He went to the clinic when he knew you’d be at school but Andrew still greeted him with a “She’s not here.” 

“That’s the point,” Joel said. “Here for you. Rather she not know. Have a minute?” 

Andrew flagged down a woman to watch the desk and led Joel outside the clinic. 

“Next run, I’m not takin’ her,” he said. “Still interested?” 

“Why the change?” Andrew frowned. “You weren’t going for that before.” 

“Raiders are getting bad,” he replied. “You and me they’d just kill. Her…” 

Andrew nodded. 

“Can’t tell her,” Joel said. “Not until we’re back, she’ll try to stop you going.” 

“Trust me, I know,” Andrew said. “Luckily, Doc is Doc and she keeps a thorough log of what meds she’s after and what’s she’s used. I won’t need to ask her for shit.” 

“We’re heading out this weekend,” Joel said. “It’ll be a few days. Make sure your wife’s on board.” 

He just nodded and Joel was thankful, once again, that you had a friend like Andrew. 

***

“Doc,” Ellie sighed dramatically, drawing the word out as she trudged into your classroom and flopped into a desk, putting her head down. “I’m so freakin’ bored.” 

“Hi, Ellie, I’m doing well, thank you for asking,” you smiled. “How are you?” 

She raised her head enough to glare at you before putting it back down. 

“If all I’m going to do is go shoot infected for FEDRA why do I have to know about verbs?” She asked. 

“Because everyone needs to know about verbs,” you replied. “Can’t read or speak without them.” 

“Can they make them less boring at least?” She lifted her head again. “Because right now they feel stupid as fu… something stupid.” 

“Want something not boring?” You asked. Her head shot up. You smiled conspiratorially. “I got you stuff.” 

“Oh fuck yes!” She winced. “Sorry. Heck yes?” 

You just laughed and went into your school bag, pulling out photo copies of books that were in libraries of other schools that Derek got you into when he’d go teach his photography course. Ellie came and stood in front of your desk, leaning over to see what you were grabbing. 

“Got this whole thing on black holes,” you said, handing her a packet. “This one on a probe that is still probably flying through space and should be past Pluto by now.” You gave her another packet. “And then this on roller coasters.” You gave her a magazine. 

“Hell yeah!” 

You gave her a look.

“What? I said hell,” she said. “That one doesn’t even count.” 

“Go sit in your corner you gremlin,” you rolled your eyes but smiled anyway. 

“Gladly,” she smiled, chin tilted up, and took her bundle of pages over to the beanbags. She started with the roller coasters as you put on a tape and started grading tests. 

“Hey Doc?” She said after a few minutes. 

“Hm?” 

“Did you ride roller coasters?” She asked. “Was that like… a thing everyone did or was it kind of special?” 

“Well,” you shrugged. “It kind of depended. Most people did at least once but it was still kind of special. There weren’t roller coasters near where I lived as a kid and my grandma didn’t have much money but I went to a theme park with a friend once when I was about your age. And a few times with a friend and his daughter when I was in college. I rode some roller coasters then. They were pretty fun but most of the time when you went to theme parks, you spent a lot of time waiting in line.” 

“Ew,” she crinkled her nose and went back to reading. 

“Hey Doc,” Riley trudged in. 

“Hi Riley,” you said, holding out the book she’d been reading when she came to sit with Ellie. She took it and went and plopped on the other beanbag chair. “Rough day?” 

She just grunted. 

“I’m here if you want to talk,” you said, going back to grading. 

You weren’t surprised when she didn’t take you up on it. Ellie was far more likely to talk to you than her older counterpart. She’d come to your classroom almost every weekday for the past two years. For a while, she was pretty quiet. She’d bring in her reading or take from the shelf and go sit in the corner. You didn’t press her. A few months in, she’d do more than ask you questions about her reading. She talked about her classmates, the issues with FEDRA teachers and administration, about the comic books she liked. You’d started looking for the series she mentioned when you went to the underground markets or were outside the QZ as well as books about space. She’d quickly become a bright spot in your day. 

Riley, on the other hand, had become more withdrawn the last few months. She’d never opened up to you the way Ellie had, but she seemed to like you better than her other teachers and she always put in an effort in class. But lately, she’d been tired, preoccupied. You’d tried talking to her but hadn’t gotten very far - something made all the more frustrating by the fact that you were pretty sure there was no one else at the school checking in with her. She was at risk of falling through the cracks of the system and you weren’t sure you were enough of a net to catch her. 

Derek was always trying to tell you that you couldn’t save everyone and, consciously, you knew he was right. But that didn’t stop you from trying. 

It’s part of why you’d pressed so hard working on your cordyceps treatment theory. It took years - literal years - of working with samples and trying different formulations but, earlier in the year you’d found something that actually seemed to work. The right chemical combination delivered in the right way and the samples didn’t grow. They stayed in the tissue where they’d been implanted, not stretching beyond it. 

“Do you know what this means?” You asked Elias, all but shoving your notes into his hands. “We could make it so a bite isn’t a death sentence. It’s not going to cure anybody but it can make it so people can leave the QZ, go near infected to wipe them out without needing to worry as much… I mean it still needs trials but…” 

“It’s a great idea,” he said, sounding exhausted. “But do you really think we’ll be able to get the powers that be to divert manufacturing to synthesize it? Let alone the process it will take to make the factories to produce the stuff?” 

“Elias, we’re talking about something that can start getting the world back,” you looked at him, baffled. 

“I know,” he clapped a hand on your shoulder. “And I’m telling you that I don’t know that there is a world to get back.” 

You just stared at him for a moment in disbelief. 

“I’ll run it up the chain,” he said. “But… I’m not optimistic.” 

He walked away, leaving you alone with your notes in your hands. 

So you did the next best thing you could think of. You found Marlene. 

“This is…” she looked through your pages. “I mean, I don’t know shit about the science of it but your tests…” 

“They’re not tests on living subjects,” you hedged. “I mean, in the before times we’d be years out from human trials but give that the bitten are pretty much dead men walking, if we can equip people going outside the walls with this stuff we can always just see if it works when the inevitable happens… It’s not a cure and it’s by no means a sure thing but it’s a start.” 

“I’ll take a start.” 

You weren’t able to get anything more out of Riley before the weekend and Andrew was out at work on Saturday, which made you oddly nervous. Marta said Jess said he was sick but something felt off. He’d been fine on Friday… 

Derek was convinced you were being paranoid but you still woke up feeling uneasy on Monday. 

Riley missed class entirely that day. Ellie looked particularly downtrodden at lunch but didn’t say much. When you asked if something was wrong, she just shrugged, looking distracted. 

Andrew was still missing when you got to work. 

“I’m sure he’s fine,” Derek said when he came to meet you that evening. “He probably just has the flu or something. I’m sure Jess would have gotten you if it were anything serious…” 

“You’re right,” you sighed. “I know you’re right. I just… something doesn’t feel right.” 

It set your teeth on edge. You couldn’t sit still, tapping your pen on charts when you had a patient, the front desk when you didn’t. 

“Can you not hover?” Marta asked. “I’m not Andrew, for me it’s just weird.”��

“Sorry,” you sighed when the front door of the clinic flew open and Tess and Joel came running in, all but dragging Andrew between them. 

Your eyes went wide. Andrew was covered in blood, his head hanging limp. You screamed for help as you ran for him. 

“What happened?” You frantically pulled at his clothes, trying to get to his skin. His face was pale and his eyes were closed. You looked back over your shoulder. No one else was coming yet. “Help me!” 

“We were almost back,” Tess said quickly. “Raiders came out of fucking nowhere, Andrew was in back…” 

You got the bloody shirt raised enough to see the bullet holes. You scrambled to stem the bleeding as Kristen and Lee came up from the back. You kept your hands on Andrew’s stomach, your skin turning red with his blood, trying desperately to hold him together. They started trying to move him and you moved with them, hands still on him, until someone held you back. 

“You can’t help him,” Marta’s voice was thick, wet. “You can’t do it, it has to be someone else…” 

“I can…” you reached for the doors but she held you in place. 

“You can’t,” she said. “You’re too close, you can’t.” 

You weren’t sure when you’d started sobbing but your face was wet and your vision was blurry and you were too covered in blood to do anything about it. You turned to Joel and Tess. 

“Why was he out there?” You asked. Tess looked at Joel. You raised your voice. “Why was he out there!” 

Tess looked at Joel again. He just stared at the ground. 

It was like something in you snapped. Everything you’d tied up in him for decades, everything you’d felt, everything you’d longed for, everything you’d imagined existed for yourself in another time and place and world with Joel at core of it. It broke open, spilling out of you in a rush. 

You shoved him. He didn’t move to stop you. 

“It’s you, it’s always fucking you!” You pushed him again. “Decided you were done seeing me so you dragged him into it!” You threw your entire body weight at him. He caught you and held onto you until you forced him back. “I can count on one FUCKING HAND the number of people on this planet who are happy I exist and you had to take him? You hate me that fucking much?” 

Joel’s eyes finally left the ground and met yours. He was was in so much pain you could almost feel it. You stopped pushing him. His shirt was covered in your bloody handprints. 

“He has a wife! He has kids! He fucking matters to people and you dragged him into this?” You were panting for breath, still crying. You didn’t think you could stop crying if you tried. “I’ve spent half my life in love with you, Joel, half my fucking life begging to matter to you and instead you just…” A sob choked you for a moment. “I wish I’d never fucking met you. I wish you never touched me. I wish you never called me that night I wish you never came to fucking Boston I wish you just got the fuck out of my life and left me alone!” 

You went to shove him again but arms appeared behind you and Derek pulled you back into his chest, holding you in place. 

“I hate you!” You snarled it at him. “I wish it had been you, it should have been fucking you!” 

He just stood there, staring at you for a moment as Derek held you tightly to him, before Joel turned and left. After a moment, Derek’s grip on you loosened. Your head spun. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Tess was staring at you. “You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about…” 

“Fuck off, Tess,” you snapped. “You could have put a stop to it, you could have just not let him come…” 

“Not Andrew,” she shook her head, stepping close to you. “Joel. How dare you. The shit he’s done for you, the shit he’s gone through for you…” 

“For me?” You snapped. “No, it had nothing to do with me! It’s always been about him, Tess, and you’re a fucking idiot if you don’t see that.” 

“You could have walked away at anytime,” she all but snarled at you. “You could have actually stayed away from him, told him no when he fucking caved and you never did, you never fucking did…” 

“You think it’s my fault?” You snapped. “All his shit…” 

“You could have left him with me!” She yelled. She took a second to calm down. “You could have left him with me and you fucking didn’t. You just hung on…” 

“Of course I did,” you said, quieter now, too. “I didn’t have a choice.” 

She looked at you, the side of her shirt wet with Andrew’s blood. 

“I’ll go tell his wife,” she said. “I hope he makes it.” 

You felt unsteady on your feet and Derek’s arms went around you guiding you to a seat in the empty waiting room. You looked down at your hands, splotched with drying blood. Andrew’s blood. You stared at the wall. 

Jess came in. You weren’t sure how much time had passed but she was frantic. You stood up and she grabbed you, choking on her tears. You held her loosely, still in a daze, and she sat beside you, holding your bloody hand. Derek’s hand was on your back. You stared at the wall. You weren’t sure if you were really blinking. You weren’t sure time was passing. You weren’t sure how long you sat there. The blood on your shirt hardened as it dried. Jess’ hand stayed firmly in your own. 

Lee came out from the back and you and Jess jumped to your feet, hands still clasped tight. 

“It was close,” he said. “But he pulled through.” 

You didn’t really hear anything else Lee said after that. He let you back to see him and he was just coming around when you did, his eyes heavy and voice groggy. 

“What happened?” He managed after Jess had fawned over him for a minute.

“You were a dumbass who went outside the QZ,” you tried to sound upset about it but you were too happy to see him alive. “What were you thinking?” 

“Wanted to be the cool one for a change,” he smiled a little at you. You just rolled your eyes. 

“I’ll give you two a minute,” you leaned over and kissed his forehead. “But I swear to God Andrew you pull that shit on me again…” 

“I know, I know,” he said. “You’re the cool one and you’ll kill me to keep the title.” 

You went back to the waiting room. The clinic was closed but it was shortly before curfew and Derek was standing near the door. 

“Hey,” you sighed, coming over and pressing your forehead into his chest, expecting his arms to go around you. They didn’t. 

“He looking OK?” He asked. His voice was distant. You frowned. 

“Yeah,” you pulled back from him. “Everything OK?” 

He laughed darkly. 

“No, no I can’t say everything’s OK,” he shook his head. Your frown deepened. “Is Joel the reason you wouldn’t move in with me?” 

You froze. You had been so mad at Joel you’d forgotten that Derek was even there. Derek, who you’d never told about Joel. 

He pressed on. 

“Is Joel the reason that, when I asked if you thought about children, you said no?” He asked. “Jesus Christ, we’ve been together for almost seven years and you never thought to tell me you were in love with another man? A man you were regularly leaving the QZ with?” 

“Derek…” 

“Did you ever love me at all?” He looked like he was on the verge of tears. “Fuck, I tried to build a life with you!” 

“Of course I love you…” You were crying again. You weren’t quite sure when you started. “I just… It’s different and… Nothing happened with him, it’s been years, it’s been so long and…” 

“But you still loved him,” he said. “Right? You were still in love with him the whole time you were with me, right?” 

You didn’t say anything. You just tried to keep from sobbing. 

“That’s what I thought,” he ran a hand through his hair, turning away from you. “Fuck!” 

“I’m sorry,” you whispered. “I wasn’t trying to hurt you I just…” 

“You just what?” He asked turning back to you. “You just thought you’d lie to me forever?” 

“I just thought I could love you,” you said. “I do love you, it’s just not the same as him but I thought… I thought it could be. That if I ever could with anyone it would be with you because I do love you, I want to love you that way, I want a life with you…” 

“Wanting it just isn’t enough,” he shook his head, a look of sad disbelief still on his face. “Especially not after you lied to me for half a goddamn decade. It’s just not enough.” 

“Derek…” 

“I’m sorry,” he shook his head. “I can’t do this, not with you. I hope you get what you want someday, I really do. But I can’t do this.” 

He left and you stared out the front door, into the darkness, for a while. You weren’t sure how long. Eventually, you walked in a daze to Andrew’s room. Jessica had her head down on one side of his bed, his hand on her head. You pulled up a chair to the other side of him. 

“Hey,” he whispered. 

“Hey,” you managed a smile. 

“20 years later and we’re still the codependency crew,” he smiled back. 

“Yeah,” you sat down and put your head down beside him. “We are.” 

Tuesday, August 15, 2023 

“You know you don’t need to keep coming over, right?” Andrew asked, smiling down at you from the couch, his head propped on his fist. “Don’t need as much help now…” 

“Who said I was coming over for your benefit?” You scoffed. You were lying on your back, baby Jonah - named for Andrew’s father - on your chest. He was big enough that he was just starting to run and it seemed like he wanted to do that and nothing else. You swooped the toddler toward your face and blew a raspberry on both cheeks before lifting him straight up overhead, making whooshing sounds. He giggled and clapped his chubby little hands. “I’m clearly just hanging out with my best friends.” 

Elizabeth came over and hung her head over your own, her curls bobbing as she cocked her head at you. 

“Auntie Doc,” she said, her voice very serious. “Did you know your teeth are bones?” “Are they really?” You said. “Thank you so much for telling me, that is very big news…” 

“We’re reading a book about the body,” Jess flopped on the couch beside her husband. “We learned about the skeleton today.” 

“OK sweetie, Auntie Doc’s arms are getting tired so you have to move so I can bring your brother in for a landing,” you said. Elizabeth scrunched her nose but obeyed, stepping to the side so you could bring Jonah back down to your chest. 

“Who needs the gym when you have tiny humans to lift, hm?” You kept a hand on Jonah while reaching out to tickle Elizabeth, who shrieked and giddily fled toward the other side of the coffee table. 

“Alright tiny ones,” Andrew clapped his hands on his legs. “Bed time, let’s go.” 

He got up - slowly - off the couch and you lifted Jonah so he wouldn’t need to bend all the way down to reach him. Elizabeth whined all the way down the hall. You smiled. 

“I know a lot of it didn’t work out but damn,” Jess sighed. “You’d be such an amazing mom.” 

Your heart clenched at that. 

“Thanks,” you said quietly. 

“Are you planning to stay here again?” She asked. You lifted your head to look at her. 

“I feel like you’re asking me not to,” you smiled a little. 

“Not exactly,” she crinkled her nose. “But Andrew had his follow up today with Lee and…” she glanced down the hallway before lowering her voice. “I really want to f-u-c-k my husband now that he’s cleared for it which is a little tricky with you there.” You laughed. 

“I mean I guess if you want to have THAT kind of relationship with the guy,” you said dryly. 

She laughed, too. 

“Look, I’m definitely not kicking you out,” she said. “Lord knows he probably cock blocked you enough through the years when I was outside the QZ for work. If you won’t be OK at home, stay here with us…” 

“No,” you sighed. “I need to get used to it.” 

You’d hardly been to your apartment since Andrew got hurt. You’d only slept there twice since outside a few naps here and there. Otherwise, you’d been at Andrew and Jess’ place. At first, it was to help with the kids. Or that was the excuse you told yourself, anyway. Andrew had barely even made it into the apartment after being released. He needed help doing everything for weeks and you wrangling the kids gave Jess the space she needed to take care of him. The clinic had all but removed you from the schedule while Andrew recovered, you coming by for a while on Saturday and Sunday but otherwise just teaching and helping them. You’d started going back for a few hours most days but you were still at Andrew and Jess’ place all the time otherwise. 

You knew your apartment was going to feel lonely. Not just because Derek was gone but because you’d smothered the loss with Elizabeth and Jonah and the feeling of being needed. It was time to get back to real life. 

“You’re sure?” She said. “Because I mean it, you can just move in if you want…” 

You laughed at that. 

“No,” you shook your head. “I’ll go home. It’ll be good for me, I need to start adjusting.” 

“Hey,” she said, making you look at her. “You know we love you right? Me, him, the kids? Because we do.” 

You smiled. 

“Love you too.” 

You were right, your apartment was lonely. The air was stale and everything had a fine layer of dust. You made a mental note to try to set aside time to clean the place the next day, it desperately needed some TLC. As you went to bed you sighed and opened the bedside table drawer. Below a few notebooks was the picture of you, Joel and Sarah. 

It hadn’t sat by your bedside in years now. You took it out sometimes to look at when you were home alone but it always went back in the drawer when you were done, tucked away. Your fingers traced the contours of their faces. You wondered what Sarah would look like now. She’d have been the same age Joel was when you first got together - a little older, actually. That was difficult to picture. 

It was hard to think of her in that way. She’d gotten stuck in time, forever nothing but potential. She hadn’t figured out what she wanted to be yet, so you had a hard time picturing her having a career - just images of her looking happy and successful. But you could picture her in a wedding dress, Joel walking her down the aisle with a proud smile on his face. Her cradling a tiny baby with his mother’s springy curls and his grandfather’s nose. Her giving advice to her little sister - now a teenager with long dark hair and her dad’s warm brown eyes - about how to survive college. 

It didn’t seem to matter how much Joel seemed to hate you, how much you desperately wished you could hate him, he’d been built into you somehow. You couldn’t shake him, no matter how hard you tried. 

You put the picture back in its spot beside your bed and tried to sleep, feeling more alone than you had since Joel left you before the outbreak. 

It wasn’t a deep sleep. When there was a quick, quiet knock at your door, you woke with a start. You frowned, glancing at the time. It was well after curfew. You got up and looked through the peephole and saw Ellie, huddled against your door. 

You fumbled with the locks, rushing to get the door open. She hadn’t been in class in a week, you’d asked several administrators where she was and no one would give you a straight answer. You’d gone by her room to check on her and she was nowhere to be found but she hadn’t taken much with her if she’d left. You were about to go to Elias and try to leverage what little FEDRA connections you had to see what records they had about where she’d gone, see if you could get to her. Riley had vanished, too, and you just prayed Ellie hadn't gone after her.

Instead, she’d shown up at your door. You’d given her your address and schedule months ago when she showed up in class with a black eye. 

“You ever feel unsafe,” you said. “Come to me. I will help you, I will drop whatever I’m doing and I will handle it, OK?” 

“OK,” she said. 

She hadn’t shown up with a black eye since. You hadn’t pressed. 

“Ellie,” you pulled her into your chest the second the door was open. Her eyes were teary. She looked exhausted. “Where have you been, what’s been going on? I’ve been asking administration where they sent you but…” 

“Doc,” she sniffed as she pulled back from you and held out her right arm. You gasped, your hand going to your mouth. There was a vicious bite there, the teethmarks deep in her flesh. “I’m in trouble.” 

A/N: AND WE'VE REACHED THE SHOW TIMELINE BUCKLE UP FOLKS!

Yes, everyone got super blown apart this chapter. That's the goal, they're at their most emotionally vulnerable just at the start of this big trip, it's going to be great and angsty and they're going to be forced to reckon with their shit because it's right at the surface heading into these extreme situations GET READY!

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Thank you so much for reading and interacting and getting into this story I decided to write one day. It means so much to me that you're invested in it and I love you all!

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[honeymark]

𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 | 이태용

Every relationship comes with a story. This is ours.

𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐃𝐄 𝟎𝟒 ; in which you & Taeyong tell your respective sides of your love story.

# 𝑫𝑼𝑹𝑨𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵 :: ~11 minutes (2.2k words)

# 𝑾𝑨𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑺 :: insecurity, infertility

『 The video opens with a shot of Y/N and Taeyong walking into the studio. The set is white, with two white chairs seated across from each other, a white table, a set of white earbuds, and a set of white noise-cancelling headphones. Y/N takes a seat in the chair to the right, while Taeyong sits in the chair across from her. 』

Taeyong: (smiles) “You look really pretty, Honey.”

Y/N: "I think you look prettier.”

Taeyong: (chuckles) “Thank you.”

“Can you introduce yourselves?”

Taeyong: “My name is Taeyong, I’m 26 years old, and I’m a freelance webtoon artist.”

Y/N: “Hi, I’m Y/N, I am also 26 years old, and I’m a pediatric nurse practitioner.”

“How long have you been together?”

Y/N: “We dated for 6 years ㅡ”

Taeyong: “ㅡ and have been married for 2.” (smiles)

“How did you two meet?”

Y/N & Taeyong, simultaneously: "In Dr. Yoo’s biology class.”

Y/N: “At the time, the humanities majors and science majors were under the same college, so we all had to take the same pre-requisites. Taeyong and I happened to sit next to each other in the middle of the second row.”

Taeyong: “We didn’t talk to each other until you yelled at that girl, though.”

Y/N: “I didn’t yell atㅡwell, actually, I guess I yelled at her.” (sighs) “Taeyong is too nice for his own good. Like, he’s the type of classmate who’d give you the answers to a test if you asked politely for them, so of course there were people who took advantage of him. There was this one girl who never showed up to class unless she needed to. On the rare occasion that she actually did show up to class, she would always sit next to Taeyong and ask him for all of the answers. I never really paid too much attention to it, since it seemed like Taeyong didn’t mind, but the closer I watched, the more I realized that he actually did mind.” (pauses) “It bothered me how she’d always act like that, so I just...went off on her.”

Taeyong: “It was the first time anyone had ever stood up for me. I took Y/N out to coffee after that lecture.” (smiles)

“What was your first impression?”

『 The video cuts to Y/N putting in the earbuds, then sliding the noise-cancelling headphones on over her ears. 』

Taeyong: “Can you hear me?”

Y/N: (furrows eyebrows) “What?”

Taeyong: “I love you.”

Y/N: (smiles) “I love you too.”

Taeyong: (laughs) “You can still hear me!”

Y/N: (shakes head) “I’m reading your lips, I swear!”

《 HIS SIDE 》

Taeyong: “Y/N was a lot friendlier than I was expecting her to be.” (chuckles). “To be completely honest, I was always a little intimidated by her, even before she stood up to that particular classmate. Y/N was always really serious in class; she never took her eyes off of the professor, she never talked to anyone unless she had to, and she always kept her notes really organized. She also wasn’t afraid to ask questions or admit when she didn’t understand something, which was something I really admired about her, since I didn’t have that kind of confidence.” (pauses) “I also thought she was really pretty. Sometimes I drew portraits of her when she wasn’t looking, but don’t tell her I told you that.” (smiles)

『 The video cuts to Taeyong putting in the earbuds, then sliding the noise-cancelling headphones on over his ears. 』

《 HER SIDE 》

Y/N: “My first impression of Taeyong?” (pauses) “This is gonna sound pretty bad, but I didn’t think highly of him at all at first. All he did in class was sleep and draw in his notebook. He didn’t take notes, he didn’t pay attention to the lecture...he just walked in, sat down, kept his head down all throughout the class class, got up, and left.” (chuckles) “But what made it even more unbelievable was the fact that he never made less than an A on anything. He always did better than me on our exams and assignments, and I couldn’t understand why. How was it that he, someone never paid attention in class, scored better than me, someone who always paid attention and studied her ass off?” (sighs) “So...yeah, I didn’t think too highly of him, but it was out of my own jealousy.”

《 BOTH SIDES 》

Taeyong: “You didn’t like me much at first, did you?”

Y/N: “...No, I didn’t. Sorry, Yong.”

Taeyong: (laughs) “I already know, Honey. You don’t have anything to be sorry about.”

Y/N: “I love you lots now.”

Taeyong: (smiles) “I already know that, too.”

Y/N: “What’d you think about me? You probably thought I tried too hard, right?”

Taeyong: “Not really. I always admired you a lot for how hard you worked. You were just sort of...intimidating.”

Y/N: (shrugs) “It’s okay. A lot of people seem to think the same way.”

Taeyong: “I don’t think that way now.”

Y/N: (laughs) “Thanks, Honey. I appreciate that.”

“What do you like most about each other?”

《 HIS SIDE 》

Taeyong: “It’s so hard to think of just one thing, and I know that sounds really cliché, but it’s true. Y/N is my superhero. And not just mine, either. All of those kids that she sees every day, I know she’s a superhero to them, too.” (smiles) “I can’t imagine the things she has to go through and hear and see at work, but she always remains so courageous and resilient. Y/N is also very strong in her beliefs, but she isn’t afraid of admitting she’s wrong or that she doesn’t know something. She’s mature too; she’s proactive and always focuses on growing from her experiences. She doesn’t pity herself when things get tough, she always picks herself up and keeps going, and she ㅡ wait, I’m talking too much, aren’t I?” (laughs) “I’m always learning from Y/N. That’s one of the hundreds of reasons why I’m in love with her.”

《 HER SIDE 》

Y/N: “If I had to choose just one thing...I really love how diligent Taeyong is. He truly puts 110% of himself into everything he does, whether it’s in his work or his relationships with people or his cooking, literally everything. He’s just so hard-working, and he always pushes himself to do his absolute best. Of course, there are plenty of times when he gets discouraged, but he never tells himself that something’s impossible or that he can’t do something…he always knows what he needs to do to get something done, and he sticks with it no matter what. I really admire that about him. Seeing him do his best always gives me the strength and inspiration to do my best, too.”

《 BOTH SIDES 》

Y/N: “You’re really cool, you know that?”

Taeyong: (points to himself) “Me?”

Y/N: (nods) “Yes, you, Mr. Lee Taeyong. You changed my world.”

Taeyong: (smiles) “You changed mine, too. I’m grateful every day that you agreed to marry me.”

“When did you realize you’d fallen in love?”

《 HIS SIDE 》

Taeyong: “I don’t remember exactly when it was that I fell in love with her, but I vividly remember realizing it after coming home from class one day. It was during our senior year, and I had skipped my last class to go home early because I was really discouraged about some project that I had. I tried not to show how upset I was, but she could already tell that something was wrong without me even having to tell her.” (smiles) “I talked to her about what was going on, and she said something to me that really...stuck with me. She said, ‘Embrace where you are at this moment, and move on when you’re ready.’” (pauses) “No one had ever said that to me before. That’s the moment when I realized, ‘Wow. I am so head-over-heels in love with this person.’”

《 HER SIDE 》

Y/N: “I realized it pretty quickly, to be honest.” (smiles) “I remember I was really stressed out for this upcoming exam that basically determined whether or not I would be admitted into the nursing program at our school. I was so focused on studying that I kind of neglected my health, but Taeyong was there beside me the entire time and made sure I didn’t skip any meals and that I was allowed myself a break every now and then. He basically made sure that I was actually taking care of myself, and for some reason...it just gave me so much peace. Just being with him brought me so much peace.” (chuckles) “We were only a few months into the relationship at the time, but somehow, I just...knew. I knew that he’s my person, that he’s the person for me.”

《 BOTH SIDES 》

Taeyong: “When did you realize?”

Y/N: “Pretty early. Like, definitely before our 100 day anniversary.”

Taeyong: “That is pretty early.”

Y/N: “What about you?”

Taeyong: “Closer to a year into our relationship. Well, actually, I think I knew earlier, I just didn’t realize it until our senior year of school.”

Y/N: “What made you realize?”

Taeyong: “Just the things you said and the way you acted...you understood me so well, and you motivated me to be my best. That’s how I knew.” (smiles)

“What is the biggest insecurity in your relationship?”

《 HIS SIDE 》

Taeyong: “...My biggest insecurity is…I’m scared that I can’t provide for her.” (pauses) “In our culture, it’s expected that the man provides for his family…but with my job, I don’t exactly make enough money to support the both of us.”

『 Taeyong pauses again, and he takes a moment to wipe away the tears streaming down his cheeks. The camera switches to Y/N, who is also starting to tear up. The PA passes a box of tissues to Taeyong. 』

Taeyong: “Sorry about that.”

PD, from off-camera: “No worries. Do you want to take a break?”

Taeyong: (shakes his head) “No, I’m okay.” (takes a deep breath) “It’s a responsibility that I know Y/N does not and would never hold over my head, but still...there are so many things I want to do for her. I want to give her a big house and take her on a nice vacation and just...provide everything for her so she won’t have to work so hard and so often...” (sighs) “Y/N deserves the entire world, but I feel like I just can’t give it to her.”

《 HER SIDE 》

Y/N: “My biggest insecurity...”

『 Y/N opens her mouth to talk but starts crying before she’s able to speak. 』

Y/N: “Shit, I’m sorry.”

PD, from off-camera: “It’s okay. Take your time. We can move onto a different question, if you’re more comfortable with that.”

Y/N: (shakes her head) “It’s okay, I just need a second.”

『 Y/N takes a moment to dab away her tears. Taeyong scoots his chair closer to hers, and he reaches out to take her cheeks in his hands. 』

Taeyong: “You okay?”

Y/N: (nods) “Yeah, I’m fine.

『 Taeyong frowns, then takes the headphones off and the earbuds out. 』

Taeyong: “Sorry, forgot I had these on. What’d you say?”

『 The studio bursts into laughter. Y/N smiles as she kisses him and whispers something into his ear. The video cuts to a refreshed Y/N. 』

Y/N: “Taeyong and I both love children. We’ve always talked about living in a big house and having lots of kids and dogs…but the reality is that...” (sighs) “The reality is that having a future like that is...unrealistic.” (pauses) “It’s very hard for me to have children. We’ve been trying for two years now, and on the rare chances that we do get pregnant, I always fail to carry the baby to full-term.” (pauses again) “It’s really stressful, you know? Our parents are always asking us when we’re having kids...and I don’t have the courage to tell them that I can’t. I can’t do the one thing our society expects me to do, and I know that I would never hold these expectations over anyone else, but still...I just can’t help but feel insecure.”

《 BOTH SIDES 》

『 Taeyong reaches over to wipe the tears from Y/N’s face. She smiles and takes his hands in hers. 』

Y/N: “Thank you, Honey.”

Taeyong: “You know that you’re more than enough for me, right?”

Y/N: (nods) “I do. You too, you’re more than enough for me, Taeyong.”

Taeyong: (nods, then sighs) “I just…feel so bad, sometimes. Like, I wonder if you’d be happier without me.”

Y/N: “There is not a single universe that exists where I’d be happier without you.”

Taeyong: “I know.” (smiles) “I love you, Y/N. You’re all I need.”

“What is something you’d like to say to your partner?”

《 BOTH SIDES 》

Taeyong: “Y/N, my beautiful wife, thank you for loving me and supporting me all these years, even though I’m lacking in so many ways.” (smiles) “You’ve seen me at my highest and at my lowest, yet you’ve continued to love me just the same. You’re my everything, Y/N. I will work my absolute hardest to continue to make you happy. I love you so much.”

Y/N: “My lovely Yong, thank you for loving me so much every single day. Thank you for accepting me for who I am and for never asking me to change. You’re my best friend, my soulmate, my entire world. Thank you for being you, Lee Taeyong. I am genuinely so, so in love with you, and I have never been happier. I’m excited for our future together.”

Taeyong: “Thank you for everything, Y/N.”

Y/N: (smiles) “You too, my love. Thank you for everything.”

『 The interview ends. Both Y/N and Taeyong stand up and bow to the staff before stepping off-camera and exiting the studio. The camera cuts to the PD, who is wiping away her tears. The video fades to black, with the crew laughing in the background. 』

[turbulentscrawl]

If I may ask, may you do general headcanons for emil, if not then just ignore this💜

Suuuuure can!

!Edited on 01/26/24 to add a few more small HCs!

Warning: Mentions of abuse (a lot)

-Emil’s health situation is as complicated as it is depressing. He suffers from chronic pain that’s a result of the years of abuse he’s endured—both in the dog fighting ring and in the asylum. Ironically, he’s got some of the highest pain tolerance out of all the survivors, but it’s difficult to tell when he’s I the middle of his worst days. (This pain tolerance is all psychological, however. A little something he developed as a defense mechanism.)

-Pain medicine does little for him now. He was on such high doses of opioids while in the middle of his shock and bloodletting treatments that they don’t help much anymore while also having dealt him some lasting issues like low blood pressure and brittle bones. This bone weakness, his parkour movements, and lowered sensitivity to pain mean he tends to suffer more severe injuries in matches than most.

-Emil’s communication skills have improved over the last few years, but he still struggles with writing and social cues. He’s used to the body language of dogs and angry men, so things like confident shoulders and direct eye contact make him nervous. If those behaviors are displayed towards Ada or another special person, he may become aggressive.

-In addition to his communication struggles, Emil’s emotions are also rather stunted; he often has disproportionate reactions to events and stimulus around himself. (He especially tends to under-react.) It’s very rare for Emil to cry or become genuinely angered. He spends most of his time with that pitiful, placating, resting smile and just letting the world whirl around him.

-Emil’s attachment to Ada mostly comes down to hers being the first truly kind hand he’s ever been offered. Despite any dubious motives, Ada does genuinely care about helping people, and at the time of meeting Emil she had not been a practicing physician long enough to be come jaded or careless. Other doctors did not spare Emil any sympathy because he was quiet and obedient, but Ada still gave him those. Her being in trouble is one of the few times this emotional reactions will be high—he’s terrified of losing his only source of comfort, and will become desperate and violent in order to keep her safe.

-Emil likes “being in a daze” because when he’s drugged up his constant pain is muffled. But he’s also less aware in general, and he’s so desperate for affection that he’s willing to forego the relief to be alert around Ada, or anyone else who dotes on him. Also similar to a dog, he’s fiercely loyal to Ada because she takes care of him. It’s not impossible for him to become attached to others too, but it will take time and repeat exposure to get over his protective urges. He’s more likely to get along with children and people Ada specifically introduces him to.

-Emil doesn’t have much preference in regards to food; he’s used to eating slop, scraps, and dog kibble. He does, however, like cakes because Ada always gave those to him as a “treat.” They represent another form of praise and affection to him. He prefers to eat with his hands than utensils—it hurts to try gripping those tiny things.

-Emil is afraid of dogs, and this unfortunately includes Wick. He and Victor don’t get along well because of how much the pup means to the Postman. He does seem to have some fondness for Ann’s cat, though.

-Most love languages work well for Emil, but Physical Touch and Words of Affirmation are his favorites to receive. (He rarely knows what to do with the gifts he’s given, however.) To give, he likes Acts of Service and Gift Giving. Emil loves to be touched gently, for any reason. Pet his hair, rub his back, massage his hands, he doesn’t care as long as you’re doing it with the intention of being loving and gentle. He even easily forgives missteps that aggravate his pre-existing pain. Uneducated as he is, Emil still knows what remorse looks like. The gifts he gives are rarely valuable in a monetary way, but he likes to share pretty things with the people he loves. A wire ring, a nice rock he found, the undamaged wings of a dead butterfly, you get the idea.

-Sexual abuse was among the abundance of mistreatment he suffered growing up. If and when Emil does engage in those sorts of activities, they require patience and a lot of communication to avoid triggering him. Ironically, he does better with those things when he’s NOT being regularly treated by Ada because the memories are buried too deep to crop up.

-Emil is somewhere between the ages of 25 and 28. As an adult, he grows facial hair, but he's not able to shave himself due to both a nervousness about knives and unsteady hands. Ada does it for him about once a week, and it's a time-consuming activity due to Emil needing regular reassurances.

-Another trait he's picked up from his canine company is "licking his wounds." And other people's if he cares about them enough. You've cut your finger? In his mouth it goes. Saliva does tend to promote healing to an extent, so most people let his behavior be.

[inexplicifics]

26 for the domestic ask meme, if it strikes your fancy? <3

“Geralt,” Jaskier says gently. “Buy it.”

Geralt grimaces and turns away from the jam-seller’s stall. “It’s too expensive.”

“My purse is currently very full,” Jaskier points out. He’s just come from a month-long engagement at a count’s manor, entertaining a series of house-parties, and though he had cuckolded the count, repeatedly and with great gusto, the count had actively encouraged the affair, and had therefore not had Jaskier turned out without his due earnings when the festivities were over.

“Your purse,” Geralt says pointedly. Jaskier knows the witcher’s purse is rather leaner, on account of the local alderman being somewhat less generous than his liege lord.

“And what’s mine is yours, and has been for years now, darling,” Jaskier says. “Besides. You know if you don’t use it, I will, and I’m doubtless going to buy far too much wine and then you’ll be irritated at making Roach carry it, or I’ll be far too tempted to buy that doublet in the window back there - yes, the green and yellow one with lavender trim. Isn’t it striking?”

“It ought to be struck,” Geralt says, giving the magnificent doublet a look of extraordinary disgust. Or, well, to anyone else it would doubtless appear to be no more than a slight twitch of the lip, but Jaskier knows it’s pure disgust, and that’s what matters.

He wouldn’t actually buy the doublet. The yellow is a shade which is quite wrong for his skin. But he has no qualms about using it to tease Geralt into being nice to himself for once. “There, you see? You ought to save me from myself, and your eyes from having to behold its glorious extravagance.”

“By buying myself jam.”

“Precisely.” Jaskier beams. “And then you will have jam, and I will not have that doublet!”

Really, coaxing Geralt to do nice things for himself is a better use for his rhetoric training than Jaskier ever expected to find out in the world.

“Hm,” Geralt says, eyeing Jaskier dubiously. Jaskier grins brightly back at him. “I saw a pair of absolutely tremendous trousers, too,” he says helpfully. “They’ve got ribbons!”

Geralt glowers at him very impressively and turns back to the jam-seller, who has been watching the whole exchange with obvious interest. “The strawberry,” he grits out. “One jar.”

“Two!” Jaskier says, draping an arm around Geralt’s shoulders. “One is hardly going to put enough of a dent in my purse, darling.”

Geralt eyes him dubiously. “One. And one pot of the raspberry,” he says.

Raspberry is Jaskier’s favorite, and for some inexplicable reason Geralt loathes it. Jaskier’s witcher is so damn sweet sometimes; Jaskier doesn’t know how the whole world can fail to see it. He’ll fix that, he swears. He’s made them see his White Wolf is more than a Butcher; by the time he’s done, Geralt will be beloved, or Jaskier isn’t a master bard. Which, of course, he very much is.

The jam-seller hands over two wax-sealed pots with a cheerful smile, and Jaskier watches Geralt put them very carefully in his pack, and thinks that he isn’t going to regret leaving the doublet behind at all.

[cellarspider]

26/30 PIE to the face

(Previous) | (Index) | (Next)

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We return to a movie that is going to linguistically hurt me again, Prometheus. You get to read a ramble about PIE. You’re welcome.

Content warning for MORE OF ME. I cannot be stopped.

So. Imagine you have found a sleeping alien. You believe that they were on a mission to destroy humanity as a disappointment. What do you do? Not waking them up is certainly an option. But what if you do? You’re going to want to not disappoint them.

One could, for example, study the records still maintained within the alien ship. Learn about their culture. Get more than one guy to learn their language, particularly since this translator you’ve got seems to be a little gung-ho on things like “seeing [his] parents dead.” That’s a bit of a warning sign.

And hey, something horrible happened on this ship, probably right before or right after this alien was put into hibernation. There’s a lot of dead bodies on the ship. Having a trauma counselor or three there would be a good call. People trained in de-escalation, definitely. Give you a chance to talk the alien down, and help them process stuff in what’s hopefully a culturally appropriate manner, given your xenological research before waking them up.

You’ll probably want to make sure to take the “kill humanity” button away from them too, that would be a good idea. And, preferably, not have exploded the head of one of their colleagues.

Am I describing a process that would take years? Yes. It should. This is the most important thing humanity’s ever done.

It’s been two days since the Prometheus landed.

As stated before, my faith in fictional humanity was not high in this scene.

David wakes the Engineer up. Rather than any of the measures I described above, the Engineer is met with David, Weyland, some security guys, Doctor Franenstein the head-exploder, and Shaw.

It took most of the humans a good hour or so to stop looking like death after waking up after a two year nap, and this Engineer’s been under for a thousand times longer. The poor bugger is visibly hung over and feeling sick, almost falling over on Weyland.

Shaw starts demanding David ask where they’re from, what’s in the ship’s cargo, why was it made for humans, all in English as Weyland tries to talk over her. They are speaking a language that only took its modern form 1600 years after the last events on this ship took place. The Engineer has zero clue what anyone’s saying.

The Engineer remains silent, and visibly disturbed by how Wayland orders his security guy to hit Shaw, which just makes the still unintelligible questions louder and less coherent.

And then David starts speaking to them.

There was a short dialog between them filmed, but in the final cut, the Engineer doesn’t speak at all.

The final cut also removes Weyland’s pitch for why he should have immortality–he created life in David. David is something more perfect than human. Therefore Weyland is a god, and gods never die.

This is, as you can imagine, not convincing. It would’ve made Weyland slightly more explicable as a character, but the movie hasn’t even done that for its lead, so of course it doesn’t for Old Man Capitalism.

In the full release, David only says a few sentences. To quote Anil Biltoo, who wrote the translation:

The line that David speaks to the Engineer (which is from a longer sequence that didn’t make the final edit) is as follows: /ida hmanəm aɪ kja namṛtuh zdɛ:taha/…/ghʷɪvah-pjorn-ɪttham sas da:tṛ kredah/ A serviceable translation into English is: ‘This man is here because he does not want to die. He believes you can give him more life’.

This is–okay. In the theater, I did not know precisely what this language was. But I was making a fair imitation of the Engineer's expression in response to this, because I was pretty sure it was PIE.

Proto-Indo-European, that is. A massive swath of world languages are all traceable back to one source, though we have no records of it. Linguistic reconstruction of how they evolved from earlier roots allows us to infer a language that must have existed, and we call that the Proto-Indo-European language. PIE for short. And this is a big ol’ slice of PIE right here. 

And I had a whole thing in early drafts of this post. I’d convinced myself over the years that my inexperience with PIE had led me astray in the theater. I’d convinced myself this was a PIE conlang. Meaning, I thought this was a language created for this movie that sounds like a cousin to PIE. That’s still howlingly weird, for reasons I’ll get into. But then I saw this featurette:

[Video description: A behind the scenes featurette for Prometheus entitled “Language Of The Gods”. It interviews Anil Biltoo on his work for the movie, in which he explains the concept of a proto-language, of PIE in specific, and what he did for the movie.]

It’s PIE. It’s a different reconstruction of PIE than the current standard, but it’s PIE.

And I feel vindicated, because that’s what I heard in the theater. David opened his mouth and out came PIE. 

I can actually read a few words in the excerpt. I could hear them in the theater. The word /hmanəm/ is clearly meant to be a root word of “man”, which standard reconstructions indicate is the descendent of PIE *ǵʰmṓ. /Namṛtuh/ is very clearly from PIE *ne-mért, “not-die”, because anything that looks like “mort” in an indo-european language probably has something to do with death. And “/kredah/” is close to PIE *ḱréddʰh₁eti, hence Latin “crēdit”, hence modern italian “créde”, “he believes”. 

PIE is just like that, sometimes. Some roots are unrecognizable, others are instantly identifiable. I’ll include my attempt at a gloss (a brief technical explanation of the meaning and grammar) at the end of the post.

The implication is that the Engineers taught their language to humans. That was Proto-Indo-European, which then spread from there. I almost started laughing in the theater at this. 

In the real world, we know a few things about where PIE came from. PIE was probably spoken by people north of the Black Sea, at least five thousand years ago. This guy who’s just woken up with a hibernation hangover went to sleep three thousand years after that. 

But, y’know what? Fine. Let’s say it’s a liturgical language. David’s done the equivalent of walking up to somebody and speaking to them in church Latin. Weird, but not impossible that it could be understood. Or maybe they’re just so damn long-lived and linguistically conservative that it’s more like talking to somebody in an old-timey news broadcaster voice. Still weird! But comprehensible.

But you know what we can’t possibly link back to PIE? Egyptian, Sumerian, Akkadian, Hawaiian, or the Mayan languages, most of the other ancient cultures the movie says the Engineers definitely contacted. Did all those come from the same ur-language? We don’t know. We can’t know, because our reconstruction methods are ineffective past a certain point. But if they did, then their root language had to have existed before the Bering Strait closed off the Americas from Asia, making any common ancestor at least twice as old as PIE. The movie’s implication is that it was PIE. The language of the gods is PIE. PIEngineer.

Apparently everybody who the Engineers talked to just forgot the language of the gods, save for the linguistic descendants of some nomads on the Black Sea Steppe.

And that’s before we get into the worse implications. We can’t tie East Asian languages back to PIE. Austronesian languages. American languages. African languages. Were these people just not contacted by the Engineers? Did they forget? Did they refuse to listen?

None of these are good answers! None! They’re all bad!

In Anil Biltoo’s defense, he’s an academic linguist, and, to my knowledge, not one who’s a conlanger. Ridley Scott specifically wanted to work in the oldest possible human language, and Biltoo delivered on that, based on modern scholarship. He did not make an alien language that evolved into a human language. If Scott had wanted that, David and Jesse Peterson would probably go feral for the project, but they weren’t asked. What would be the most naturalistic thing to do, if you wanted to get across the idea that humans inherited language from the Engineers?

You make a Proto-Human language. People have tried before, and others have argued their attempts are bullshit. This is one of those times that Wikipedia has a “the neutrality of this article is disputed” flag at the top of the page, because there are nerd fights everywhere on this. We don’t even know if a Proto-Human language ever existed–there could have been multiple independent origins of language–but if you’re writing fiction, sure, Proto-Human exists.

Come up with a vocabulary and grammar that could work for Proto-Human, have David speak it to the Engineer, it sounds alien to everybody, nobody gets to be the special children of the gods, and no linguistics dork in the audience will laugh at you.

They will definitely laugh at what happens next, though.

But the post is not done! Bonus linguistic nerdery below, including a sample of my constructed language and its script.

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Citations for alt-text rambles:

https://moomin.fandom.com/wiki/Stinky 

https://www.deviantart.com/pretty--kittie/art/Prometheus-Engineer-407327934 

https://www.uni-wuerzburg.de/en/news-and-events/news/detail/news/new-indo-european-language-discovered/

Edit: additional citations!

Movies in 15 Minutes review of Prometheus by @cleolinda, as retrieved from the Internet Archive. Hat tip to @kantama for identifying it!: https://web.archive.org/web/20120726203957/http://m15m.livejournal.com/23209.html

PIEngineer gloss

Alright, for the language nerds in the audience, I’ve put together a potential gloss, entirely based off of PIE roots available on Wiktionary and a shaky understanding of PIE verb construction:

/ida hmanəm aɪ kja namṛtuh zdɛ:taha/…/ghʷɪvah-pjorn-ɪttham sas da:tṛ kredah/ this.[singular neuter??] man.NOM [anaphoric demonstrative].1.NOM.MASC here not-die EMPHATIC/towards.3MASC.PRES(?)…life-many-[resultative or inchoative verb suffix? adjective of possession, accusative singular?] [genitive singular reflexive?] give.[middle 3S] believe.[stative(?) 3S] A more literal translation would therefore be “This man here does not (want to) approach death…he believes he (can be) given more life-having to himself.”

I am not good at figuring out suffix affixation for PIE verbs, so I probably missed or misinterpreted a few in there. I’m not sure how to break down /zdɛ:taha/ in particular, and /sas/ is a bit mysterious to me. Biltoo definitely created his own PIE reconstruction for this. Vowels are all shifted (ex *éy -> /aɪ/), there’s more palatal consonants (*ḱi-Ø -> /kja/, *polh₁-r̥-m -> pjorn), and other sound shifts I’m too scatterbrained to categorize right now.

PIEngineer to Tade Taadži translation

Alright. I previously mentioned that I have a conlang. I have yet to mention that it is distantly related to Prometheus, powered by the spiteful creative energy this movie engendered in me.

So it’s only fair I translate this passage into my language, write it in my script, and give a thorough gloss.

Jàà odormàà, hu sàà id aannãgu … midadjã kii jur kaas ʻus mogeso. /jɐː odoɾmɐː hu sɐː id aːnːãgu/ / … /midadjã kiː juɾ̥ kaːs ʔus mogeso/ This.VOC not-native-person.ALL, death.INST not go.ATTR want.PRES. Forever.NOM give this.ALL 2S.VOC ACC 3S.NEAR.ponder.PRES.3P.FAR.ACC

Translation notes:

I am assuming David is speaking formally, clearly, and respectfully in this translation, even if one of the people he’s being respectful about is Weyland. Both Weyland and the Engineer are thus addressed using the Vocative case when first directly mentioned.

Due to the formality of the speech, formal style glyphs are also used: these require significant planning ahead of time, to identify ligatures, aesthetic considerations, and, ideally, to select a total number of words that works out to a multiple of six, as this is culturally the ideal number for a line of text.

Formal ligatures can cross glyph boundaries, and are read every time you encounter part of them in the left-to-right, top-to-bottom reading order. The most common ligatures are between grammatical markers, as in this text, but can extend to whole glyphs or even individual components of them. If one is feeling particularly artistic, aesthetic ligatures may also be joined between thematically similar glyphs.

Gendered pronouns are not used in this context. Politeness dictates that any third person pronouns be replaced with the equivalent of “this” or “that”, unless given express permission to use more informal terms of address. This is especially true when referring to non-native speakers, as they do not have an equivalent social role to the five (yes, five) genders of Taadži culture.

The word for “non-native person” used to indicate Weyland literally means “thing that has a spirit”.

Following my shaky PIEngineer gloss, I tweaked the verb in the first sentence: “to die” would normally be “hur hybà” (lit. “to stand at death”), but this has been changed to “hu iddà”, “go to death”, indicating that Weyland fears even getting near the idea.

The word for “forever”, “midadjã”, is derived from the word for 6^6, or 46,656. Tade Taadži uses a base six number system, because I felt like taking Jan Misali up on his heximal advocacy.

The normal word order for the language is SVO, but in dependent clauses it becomes OVS, just to make things harder for everyone, including me, who muttered “ah fuck” when I had to check my notes to remember where to put an allative and vocative in there. It’s after the verb, apparently.

The language has verbal person marking in some contexts, and I deliberately bent the second sentence into a more poetic mode so that I could show it off while retaining formal speech, referring to Weyland’s belief as if it’s a person. The glyphs ligate the person marker to the tense marker, Both to save space and for aesthetic purposes.

I had no word for “believe” when I started writing this sentence, so I grabbed a verb already associated with thinking during unmoving meditation to stand in for it, to get across the idea that “this is something he has thought about a lot”.

It’s a shame David’s being polite, because while I didn’t have a word for “believe”, I do have a word for “to believe despite evidence to the contrary”.

Bonus citations:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daemon_(computing)

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[14dayswithyou]

more teo fluff PLEASE THE KIDS ARE STARVING

✦゜ANSWERED: No, they can stay starving xoxo

Never in my life have I seen the words "Teo" and "fluff" in the same sentence.........

But with that being said; this man has an (expensive) skincare routine, and wouldn't mind doing it with you in his spacious bathroom. He'd be lying if he said he didn't secretly enjoy domesticity.

Teo has never actually dated anyone in all of his 26 years of living... The closest he got was crushing on a certain someone in high school.

Teo willingly paid for Leon's mother's hospital fees -- as well as Jae's university tuition and the startup fees for Violet's flower shop.

He never explicitly told you what he studied at University, but would always show up to more than half of your morning classes. He spent most of it on his phone, but it was nice having him sit next to you.

He's willing to watch Attack on Giants with you if you asked, but would much rather be doing something chaotic in the city instead ^^;

You didn't hear this from me, but he only ever sleeps on the left side of the bed. You can claim the right side all to yourself if you somehow manage to bag him.

And if you do somehow manage to bag Teo -- or at the very least, make him catch feelings -- then he'd probably spend his nights listening to The 1975 in a dark room instead of messing around with his FWBs.

Dyed his hair green because he lost a bet and didn't want to be a coward. What was the bet?? Who knows 🤫 (I knows lmao)

[canonicallyobserving911]

Several Sentences Sunday

Fanonwriter2023 on AO3

Where CANON and FANON collide!

Season 7 FANON Speculation: Buddie Multi-Chapter Fanfic - Hiatus Reading: “I’m still in love with you but... I needed to learn how to love myself too!”

Chapter 26 will be posted soon.

This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

Currently 25 chapters completed: 973.1K Words; Rated: Mature

One chapter will be posted at a time.

___________

I'm excited to finish writing Chapter 26 because at the end of Chapter 25, the Diaz family had just returned to the U.S. and after they made it home, Eddie checked his voice mail and there was a message from his cousin about an attempted delivery of a SpedEx package for Buck. Buck had no idea who it was from and he worried about it all weekend into the New Year.

They attended Maddie's and Chimney's New Year's Eve party which turned out to be an engagement party for them but they told their found family they got married while they were in Italy and that Buck adopted Chris on Christmas morning. Everyone questioned them regarding why the didn't tell anyone about their nuptials but they reassured them they're going to have a vow renewal ceremony in May of 2024 so they can all celebrate with them. But they didn't tell them they put a bid on a house in Italy and they aren't planning to until they believe the time is right.

On January 2nd, Buck accepted the package from the SpedEx delivery driver and after he opened it and viewed the contents, he collapsed and became unresponsive and unconscious right after Eddie entered the room.

___________

Here's a snippet from Chapter 26 of Eddie panicking and calling emergency services.

___________

Even though Eddie doesn’t have an ECG machine in his medical bag, he knows the signs and symptoms associated with a bradycardia event and that’s exactly what he believes Buck’s experiencing.  It’s been more than a minute and a half since his eyes closed and he’s worried out of his mind. He’s been counting the seconds ever since he put the pillows underneath his head and his ankles and he’s still counting but now he’s reached two minutes and Buck's entering the danger zone and he needs to get help fast.

For a brief moment, he considers lifting him up, carrying him to the truck and driving to the hospital but he knows that’s his heart talking instead of his rational mind which is filled with LAFD protocols and his paramedic training.

He doesn’t have any of the necessary equipment needed to revive him and if his husband dies on his watch, he’ll die too and that’s not an option.  He's already lost one spouse and Chris has lost one parent and him and Buck promised each other they're going to die on the same day at the same time 50 or 60 years from now, so he has to act quickly. Instead of continuing his mental debate about if he should call emergency services or drive Buck himself, he removes his phone from his pocket, dials 9-1-1 and waits for what seems like an eternity.

“9-1-1, what’s your emergency?”

“Yes I’m at 4995 S. Bedford St. and I have an adult male, 31 years of age whose unconscious and unresponsive and I need medical response.”

“Ok sir, can I get your name?”

“Eddie Diaz!  I’m a firefighter and a paramedic with the 118.”

“Eddie!”  Linda asks.

“Yes!  Linda, I’m so glad it’s you.”  He heaves past the sob lodged in the back of his throat that feels like a ping pong ball and continues.  “Listen, it’s Buck… SHIT!”  He stops talking because he remembers he's supposed to follow protocol for her recording and he tries again.  “I mean you need his first and last name for the call.  It’s my husband Evan Diaz and he’s also a firefighter with the—the 118.”

“Ok Eddie, I’m checking to see which RA unit is the closest to that address but can you tell me what happened?”

“I—I came into the living room; he was swaying back and forth and I caught him before he—he hit the floor.  I manually checked his vitals by doing the ABC method… I opened his airway, checked his breathing along with his circulation then I—I grabbed my medical bag and I checked his pulse, his blood pressure and his heart rate but all of them are still low which is why I believe he might be having a bradycardia event.  Linda… oh my god, whatever is happening to him is more serious than a syncope event because he’s still unresponsive.”

“Can you tell me how long he’s been down?”

“It’s been more than two minutes but I didn’t start counting until after I caught him.”

“Ok, Eddie, our closest unit is about 6 minutes away.”

He frowns and loudly asks, “Six minutes?  Why?!  I’m sorry please—please forgive me for being loud but I... I—I’m asking because there’s a firehouse less than 4 minutes from here.”  He feels like he’s about to jump out of his skin because the proximity of their home to the closest fire station in this area is one of the reasons he decided to purchase it.  He wanted to be close to one for Chris just in case they ever have to call.

“You’re right Eddie there is but they’re returning to their station from a call and they’re caught in a backup on the I-110 and…”

He interrupts her.  “Linda, I—I can’t wait any longer so… I’m going to pick him up and drive him to the hospital myself…”

“Eddie?!”

He keeps talking and he thinks he can hear Sue talking in the background too but in this moment, he needs to get his husband the help he needs.  He says, “Linda, I need to…”

“EDDIE!”  She calls his name again but louder this time because she needs to get his attention. 

The panic he feels is threatening to escape his lungs and he wants to scream but he swallows it again and responds, “Yeah?”

“Eddie, listen to me.  I know it’s hard but I need you to remain calm.  Are you listening?”

Eddie’s practically hysterical but what is he going to do next? 🥹

Will he listen to Linda and follow protocol or will he pick Buck up and carry him to the hospital himself? 🤷🏽‍♀️

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This is an EPIC LOVE STORY!

Fic Summary: Months after Buck and Eddie were hit by the same lightning strike; they’re still struggling with the aftermath of it.  But before they make their love confessions, they’ll spend time getting to know themselves as individuals first. Eddie learns to enjoy the simple things in life as he participates in activities on his own and with new friends while Buck learns the rest of the 31-year-old deep dark family secret about his conception and birth. Their journey to forever is still a work in progress but once they finally admit they’re in love with each other, everything that follows their love confessions will be cataclysmic.

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Chapter Summaries

Chapter 1 - Eddie makes a new friend while Buck receives devastating news regarding the sperm donation he made for Connor and Kameron.

Chapter 2 - Buck does a lot of research to learn more about the abnormalities found in his red blood cells and Eddie starts a new therapy journey that’s all about him and not the traumas he’s experienced.

Chapter 3 - After more than a month, Buck and Eddie finally spend time together outside of work but it doesn’t end well and they part with a lot of uncertainty regarding their places in each other’s lives.

Chapter 4 - Eddie has a few realizations about his life which causes him to consider moving back to El Paso, TX while Buck continues to be reminded of his past which causes him to take an impromptu road trip across America.

Chapter 5 - Both Buck and Eddie have difficult conversations with their parents and Buck finally learns the truth behind the reason why his mother despised him while Eddie finally tells his mother about the way she tries to control him.

Chapter 6 - More than two weeks after Buck pushed Eddie away after suggesting they needed a break; Eddie decides to try again. Eddie’s there for Buck when he’s at his worst just like Buck was there for him when he was at his worst and he won’t let Buck give up.

Chapter 7 - After Buck’s mental breakdown, Eddie has his back the same way Buck had his when he had his own breakdown more than a year ago.  They share several vulnerable and emotionally intimate moments with one another and they begin to realize their small, sweet and caring gestures matter just as much if not more than any grand gesture ever could because these are the foundations of a long-lasting love relationship.

Chapter 8 - Buck, Eddie and Chris all have their own therapists and during their sessions, they reflect on their pasts while they’re in the present so they can prepare for their future together as a family.

Chapter 9 - Buck and Eddie are there for each other when Buck has to testify as a witness during the trial.  But by the end of it, they’ll both realize their individual and shared traumas are going to keep resurfacing until they talk about them, deal with the fact that they’re in love with one another and face the fact that they can’t live without each other.

Chapter 10 - As Buck and Eddie finally begin to confront their past traumas, they realize how much they need each other to fill in the gaps of their memories.  Additionally, the universe screams at them for what appears to be the one hundredth time so Buck can realize he doesn’t have to ‘find it’ because he already ‘made it’ and Eddie’s reminded tomorrow isn’t promised and he doesn’t have to die alone if he doesn’t want to.

Chapter 11 - A “virga” or dry thunderstorm is in the forecast but once the rain starts, the thunderstorm happening outside won’t be able to match the storm brewing inside between Buck and Eddie.  It’s the universe’s final scream and when the tumultuous winds begin to blow, they’ll have one last chance to hold onto everything they’ve built over the last six years or they’ll lose it all forever.

Chapter 12 - Buck and Eddie have always shared a deep physical attraction and an emotional intimacy that’s unmatched but now that they’re in a relationship, they’re learning how to navigate the romantic intimacy they’ve been waiting for six years to explore. The love they have for each other is a once in a lifetime, soulmate, love of their lives type of love that transcends space and time.

Chapter 13 - While navigating the newness of their romantic relationship, Buck and Eddie take advantage of every moment they spend together. As their individual lives, people from their pasts, time constraints and the possibility of losing each other again make attempts to interrupt and interfere with their journey to forever, they love, care for, support and hold onto each other even tighter to withstand it all.

Chapter 14 - Buck and Eddie can see the lights at the end of the tunnels regarding the results of Buck’s Cancer Screening along with everything else they’re dealing with. But are the lights they see exits to the tunnels or are they headlights on different runaway trains that are speeding towards them in an effort to interrupt their forever?

Chapter 15 - Buck and Eddie have known they were exactly who the other one wanted in a partner since they met six years ago when they agreed to have each other’s backs. They’re in a romantic relationship, they’re both preparing to ask the other one to spend forever with them and by the end of the seventh week into their relationship, together they will plan their most important and greatest adventure for their future.

Chapter 16 - As Buck and Eddie begin to prepare for their marriage ceremony that will take place in Rome, Italy in December 2023, they start planning their first international adventure as a romantic couple. Even though Chris is still the only person they’ve told about their relationship, several people who know them have already witnessed the love they share and as the days continue, others will witness it too.

Chapter 17 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to departing Los Angeles for their international adventure, a moment in time will remind them; life is fragile, tomorrow isn’t promised and every second of everyday should be cherished because everything can change in an instant. The result of that realization will cause them to hold onto each other even more.

Chapter 18 - As Buck, Eddie and Chris prepare for family gatherings before and during the Thanksgiving holiday, the “Santa Ana Winds” start to blow and all sorts of expected and unexpected familial drama ensues.

Chapter 19 - As Buck and Eddie get closer to their wedding day, the universe begins to align everything so that some of their parent and children's relationships are strengthened while others come to an abrupt end.

Chapter 20 - With only 14 days remaining until Buck, Eddie and Chris depart Los Angeles, CA traveling to Rome, Italy, for their first family adventure, an early morning conversation about “tying up loose ends” helps Buck and Eddie realize there are still several things left unfinished on their ‘To Do’ lists. The question is will there be enough time to complete all of them?

Chapter 21 - Buck, Eddie and Chris are finalizing their ‘To Do’ Lists, double checking their itineraries and packing their suitcases in preparation for their trip to Europe so they can board their flight that departs Los Angeles, CA on Friday, December 15, 2023 at 3:25PM.

Chapter 22 - While Buck, Eddie and Chris spend the first 8 days of their European family adventure in Italy, their primary reason for going will be fulfilled as well as several others they hadn’t considered or anticipated.

Chapter 23 - As the Diaz Family continues their Italian family adventure, they’ll say, “Ciao” or hello and goodbye to a lot of things almost immediately after they become an official and legal family.

Chapter 24 - After Buck, Eddie and Chris arrive in London, England on December 24th; the Diazes immediately start preparing to spend their first family Christmas together. During their stay, each of them will hear a few choice words that will be the life raft to get them home to complete their searches to be seen and to be found.

Chapter 25 - After spending more than two weeks in Europe, Eddie, Buck and Chris are back in Los Angeles and they’re getting ready to attend Maddie and Chimney’s New Year’s Eve party. During the event, they have plans to make two surprise announcements but the question is, who’s really going to be surprised, the Diaz family or their found family at the 118?

Chapter 26 - Will be posted soon.

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Read chapters 1-25 are available on AO3.

Continue reading on AO3

Chapter 26 will be posted soon.