#i get why - a lot of cis people or people who aren't t4t don't understand how much transness impacts romance

[danmeichael]

supporters of queer m/f romance fiction so frequently miss out on the glory of transhets, and especially t4t transhets, which is a shame.

[velvetvexations]

anon really went Ah a trans woman who isnt skinny or hairless or feminine and doesnt want to be (thing that can also be true for cis women) clearly this must be a man. anyway (horny voice) wow you are a foot taller than me

I sure am~!

I don't know if it's your blog aesthetics or your kinks or your outspoken opinions on trans rights that gets me the most but i have a huge crush on you for all of the above

I'm a gift.

The way some of the trfs you reblog talk about "tmes" just sounds so much like the way a lot of incels I've seen talk about women, and it still makes me double take sometimes. I don't have an eloquent explanation of how exactly, but the vibe is just so similar to what I saw as an edgy teen on 4chan and it's so weird to see in places that claim to be "progressive"

lotta resentment

MALL ANON HAS A TUMBLR NOW??? we got side-characters fuck yes

an ever expanding cast

came for the trf takedowns and stayed for the neato aesthetic posts hope youre havin a lovely day miss velvet

thank you!

I’m so sick of people on this website taking every opportunity they get to accuse trans men who are just talking about their oppression of being 1. A violent misogynist 2. Not even trans 3. A straight up rapist or abuser. I’m actually so exhausted.

I know anon, and I'm so, so sorry. It's tiring. Take breaks as often as you can.

TRFs saying they need to post discourse and be rancid shit because theyre doing it for "the transfems who cant" (ex, trans women of color & sex workers) sounds INCREDIBLY similar to TERFs saying they need to Post Discourse and Be Rancid because "women in third world countries cant"

it sure is

Maybe i just misread it wrong but why was that one anon implying its bad for transmen to make “trans ppl should be having crazy t4t sex?” Jokes. Is there anything actually wrong about that joke?

I think you mean person I reblogged? They were saying it was sexual harassment lmao.

I feel like a lot of confusion about terfs and radfeminism is simply because a ton of self identified terfs arent radfems but are ppl whos politics abt men arent as intense (like dog standard gender essentialism) but for a lack of a better term coopt the terf concepts around transphobia.

That's certainly true, the term is becoming rapidly diluted not just from people who call all transphobes TERFs but all transphobes calling themselves TERFs. We're still not to where radical feminism is not at the core of it, though.

Some very weird trans people in the dropout tag are complaining about how dungeons and drag queens "makes them uncomfortable" PLEASE explain to me how this is literally any different from conservatives whose reaction to drag is "icky!!! Gross!" Like??? Do they think its progressive to shit on drag queens? Do they think this is ok because they happen to be trans? They sound like Republicans!

well see transfems who do drag aren't real transfems because something something

thoughts on this applying to transfem TRFs?

Blocked so I have no clue what this says.

Re: wounded gazelle. I don't even think it's always that and on purpose. Sometimes it very very blatantly IS. But other times people feel (understandably!) hurt by the backlash they are receiving and instead of thinking "This feels shitty... but could I possibly be in the wrong?" they think "I'm being attacked! This means I am a victim and therefore correct!" genuinely and through lack of self awareness rather than planned malice. Not always easy to tell the difference though!

They are very stupid and egotistical, that is true yes.

[nothorses]

No worries about responding to this one, but thank you for acknowledging some of the specific problems bi people have when dating monosexual people in one of your answers.

We're definitely perceived as greedy/ unfaithful/ in a phase/ going to cheat on someone with someone of the "opposite gender" because we're faking it, don't *really* like genders like our own or multiple genders- and people do get aggressive with us about this within the community. Or as you pointed out- we're heavily fetishized.

Whilst there are gazillion lovely monosexual people, the ones who create a hostile environment and have verbally abused me just for being bi really do make me want to stay away. Not just in terms of dating- but coming out as well. As soon as I acknowledge I like masc aligned people- I suddenly get treated differently within the community- and it's not in a nice way. I have to fall into pretending to be straight or gay just to feel safe sometimes.

Whilst I am having the nb gender question ™️ ATM I nonetheless am cis passing and will probably continue to be. I therefore cannot claim to know the dangers of dating cis people that a lot of trans people experience- so I do understand why people might see bi4bi and think it's weird and unnecessary. But while things aren't as bad it's still a thing for a reason. And sadly it's not *just* the fact that we relate to eachothers experiences/ might be more likely to get on.

Thank you for the solidarity. I love your page and I learn so much here- anyway I don't know how to do conclusions but I appreciate you

This is a great explanation! And I only want to add that I don’t think there needs to be a “you must suffer this much to ride” metric for using similar terminology to describe similar things. T4T and bi4bi both just describe similar dating choices for similar reasons. They aren’t necessarily comparing suffering, and that doesn’t need to be what the conversation is about; it’s just a naming convention.

Acknowledging yalls struggles is the bare minimum, and I’m sorry it doesn’t happen often enough that you don’t feel the need to thank me about it. But I’m glad I could cover it in a way that was helpful, and I appreciate it & you! 💙