#i get more compliments on it than i ever did before
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how they would react to you calling them “fine shyt”: the ultimate shytpost (bllk top 6 x reader)(no nagi sry)
FEATURING R. ITOSHI \\ R. SHIDOU \\ T. KARASU E. OTOYA \\ K. YUKIMIYA CONTENT mentions of insecurity (karasu's), truly a shitpost (otoya's), shidou is very very brainrotted, est. relationship for all A/N i am so sorry i don't think i will ever write for otoya properly (idl him much)
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RIN ITOSHI - aka the “what did you just call me?”
he's chronically offline, but shidou and charles are constantly blowing up his phone with dumb instagram reels and "lukewarm" tiktoks, whatever that's even supposed to mean. he's brainrotted enough just from being around them, so he shoots you a withering stare as the words leave your mouth.
you put a hand over your mouth, trying not to laugh. "rin, you do know what that means, right?"
"knowing you, probably nothing good," he says dryly, returning to his book. you pout, letting out an indignant huff. after a few moments of silence, he finally groans and sets his book back down.
"fine. tell me what it means, then."
"it means i think you're handsome, rin!" you frown, seeming more than a little offended. "can't you learn to take a compliment? i compliment you all the time, just in case you're forgetting!"
oh. he feels himself flushing, and as he opens his mouth to say something that might placate you, maybe an awkward apology -
"it's alright," you mumble, still pouting. "my sweet little rinnie poo -"
"okay, that is enough out of you -"
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RYUSEI SHIDOU - aka the "girl, i know"
he has an average screen time of six hours a day, enough said. not only is he caught up to date on all the latest slangs, but he also knows how good he looks - he's confident in his own skin. a little too confident, at times, but oh well. that's just how ryusei shidou is.
ryusei grins when you say the words to him, a twinkle in his eyes. "gotta whole roster of people sayin' that shit to me every day, don't gotta tell me twice."
you raise an eyebrow, skeptical. "oh, really? who says that to you?"
"zantetsu." he says smugly.
you frown. "what did you tell him it means?"
he's silent for a second before he admits his deception, close to tears, that he told his teammate it means "someone who's good at what they do". though you pretend to be frustrated with his antics, you can't deny he's actually kind of cute when he gets like this.
"i can still call you that," you offer, a small smile stretching your face. "if you want."
his face lights up. "really?"
"well, it's true, so..."
ryusei beams.
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TABITO KARASU - aka the "oh... okay..." (flustered)
tabito karasu knows he's not a bad-looking dude. however, though he might be confident in some areas, he doesn't really think of himself as particularly handsome. he's a very detail-oriemted person, and that includes being deeply observant about flaws, especially his own.
and so when you call him that -
tabito thinks he might just die.
which is stupid, because he's been with you for about a year now, and you tell him how handsome you think he is all the time. but the way you say this - all giggly and bashful and looking at him with such love in your eyes - it makes him want to take your face in his hands and pepper you with kisses.
and that he does, until you're both blushing messes, and your arms are looped around his neck as you give him a peck on the nose.
"i mean it, y'know. you are fine shyt." tabito snorts, but then sobers up instantly when he sees your wistful smile. "i tell you that all the time, but you never seem to believe it, so..."
"oh."
he thinks back to his first ever crush as a child, where the girl he linked rejected him publicly. there are prettier guys around, or so she'd said. it had shaped his thinking even as he grew up, that he might not ever be good enough. not for himself, and not for you.
but as he lays on the couch with his arms around you, he feels like the prettiest guy in the world.
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EITA OTOYA - aka the "you think my what is what??"
he's playing valorant with his noise-cancelling headphones on. he does NOT hear a single word of what you say.
moving on!
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KENYU YUKIMIYA - aka the "yeah. mhm. wait, WHAT -"
ah, kenyu, kenyu, kenyu. he kind of has to be "fine shyt", doesn't he - or else he'd be out of a modeling job! he's used to compliments by now; from family friends, from the photographers that work with him, from giggling girls in his classes. he truly has no "bad side". that is, until it comes to you, of course...
"really?" kenyu lets slip a slightly amused chuckle, a smile stretching his face at your words. "well, this is an unusual compliment."
"actually, on second thought -" you tap your chin with a finger. "you're actually not all that -"
and he thinks he feels his heart shatter.
"what?" he croaks, feeling physically ill. he's not online a lot, seeing as device use is bad for his eyes, but he's feeling like he's just been shot 57 times - somewhere it really hurts. "uhm… what do you mean by that?"
suspect’s girlfriend doesn’t think he’s pretty. vine boom. suspect’s girlfriend hates him. another vine boom.
“kenyu,” you laugh, “i was only joking! i mean, i have seen you drool in your sleep, and wake up from cat naps with the worst bedhead - but you’re still pretty, i promise!”
emotional damage.
vine boom.
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bllk masterlist || general masterlist © sirhamburrger 2025
#blue lock#bllk#rin itoshi#itoshi rin#rin itoshi x reader#rin x reader#ryusei shidou#shidou ryusei#ryusei shidou x reader#shidou x reader#tabito karasu#karasu tabito#tabito karasu x reader#karasu x reader#eita otoya#otoya eita#otoya eita x reader#otoya x reader#kenyu yukimiya#yukimiya kenyu#kenyu yukimiya x reader#yukimiya x reader#kai writes
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I was wondering if you could do Sevika and Ambessa x reader who still has the biggest crush on them even tho they’re dating? They get all nervous and giddy around them 🤭 just looking at them causes them to smile
♡♥︎Dating, but still Crushing ♥︎♡
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♥︎♡ Sevika ♡♥︎
♥︎ Sevika notices your nervousness right away. She’s been around long enough to recognize when someone’s acting out of character, and the way you get all fidgety and blush whenever she’s around doesn’t escape her.
♥︎ She gets a little smug about it. Her lips curl into a small, knowing smirk when she catches you glancing at her, eyes wide, a little smile tugging at your lips. She might even raise an eyebrow, like she’s amused by how cute you’re being.
♥︎ When you blush and look away, she’ll deliberately move closer, just enough to make you squirm. Her deep voice is low and teasing when she says, “You’ve been staring again, huh?” as if she’s almost daring you to admit it.
♥︎ Sometimes, she’ll catch your eye and hold it longer than usual, enjoying how flustered you get. She’ll flash a sly grin and lean in just slightly, murmuring, “You know, you’re way too obvious about it.”
♥︎ The way you can’t seem to hide your feelings around her amuses Sevika more than it should. She’s not the type to get flustered or nervous, so seeing you so openly enamored with her is both endearing and a bit of an ego boost.
♥︎ When you do something small like bite your lip or stammer over your words, Sevika won’t let it slide without a comment. She might lean in with a teasing smirk, “Getting shy on me now? Thought you were better than this,” just to watch you squirm even more.
♥︎ She’ll purposefully break the silence with her deep voice, saying something like, “What is it with you, huh? You look at me like I’m the only thing you’ve ever wanted.” She watches for the way you react, savoring the nervous little laugh or shy glance you give her in response.
♥︎ Sevika may occasionally drop a small compliment just to watch your face light up, “Did you know you look really cute when you get all nervous like that?” She’ll say it casually, acting like it’s no big deal, even though she can’t help but feel a little satisfied at the way you glow under her attention.
♥︎ There are moments when Sevika leans against something—casually, like she’s not trying to impress you at all—but she knows it gets under your skin. She watches your eyes track her every movement, and a sly grin tugs at her lips when you can’t hide it.
♥︎ She can tell when you’re thinking about her, even if you’re trying to hide it. There’s a slight twinkle in your eyes, and she’s seen that look before. It’s the kind of look that tells her you’re still in awe of her, like she’s the only one who matters. And it makes her feel… something she doesn’t always know how to deal with.
♥︎ When you don’t know how to control your feelings and start giggling nervously in her presence, Sevika might grab your wrist, pulling you close to her. She’ll look down at you with a half-amused, half-patient expression, “You’re gonna embarrass us both if you keep doing that, you know.”
♥︎ Sevika’s confidence shines through whenever she notices your crush on her, but she can’t deny the pull you have on her. You make her feel like she’s desirable in a way that even she can’t resist. She’ll catch herself staring back at you, sometimes even smirking like she’s trying to figure out just how much you’re really into her.
♥︎ She might occasionally challenge you in a playful way to see how far your nerves will go. “Come on, don’t act like you’re not thinking about me. I can see it in your eyes.” Her voice is teasing, and she enjoys watching you blush all over again.
♥︎ Sevika finds your awe of her oddly charming. When you look at her like you’re starstruck, she gets this quiet satisfaction from knowing that she’s the one causing it. It might not show on her face, but she secretly enjoys it more than she lets on.
♥︎ If you start fidgeting with your hands or avoiding eye contact, Sevika will place a hand on your arm, stilling you with a firm grip, looking down at you with a raised eyebrow. “You get nervous over every little thing, don’t you?” she’ll ask with a dry chuckle.
♥︎ Deep down, Sevika’s not immune to your crush. She finds herself drawn to how you can’t stop smiling at her like she’s your whole world. It makes her feel more powerful than she’d like to admit, but it also makes her heart beat a little faster when she realizes how much she actually cares.
♥︎ She’ll sometimes use her presence to keep you on edge—standing just a little too close or leaning over you when she speaks. It’s her way of testing just how much she can make you blush without saying anything overt.
♥︎ When you get caught in a trance staring at her, Sevika will lock eyes with you and hold your gaze for longer than necessary, her voice dropping to something almost intimate as she says, “What’s going on in that head of yours? You want to say something?”
♥︎ Her teasing comes with a sense of ownership. She knows she’s got you wrapped around her finger, and she uses that to her advantage. But beneath the teasing, there’s a subtle softness to the way she’ll touch you, like she can’t resist the connection you share.
♥︎ Sevika is oddly protective of you, too. If anyone notices how much you crush on her and comments on it, she’ll step in immediately, giving them a sharp look or cold retort, making it clear that you’re off-limits.
♥︎ On rare occasions, Sevika might let her guard down just a little. If you’re particularly nervous around her, she’ll pull you into a hug, holding you close for a brief moment before pulling away with a smirk. “You’re all over the place. Relax,” she’ll say, though she’s just as affected by the moment as you are.
♥︎ Sometimes, when she feels particularly soft and unguarded, Sevika might do something small to show she’s not immune to your affection. A soft brush of her fingers against yours or a quick peck on the cheek—nothing overt, but just enough to let you know she feels the same way.
♥︎ When you blush and try to hide it, Sevika will always call you out on it. “You think I can’t see you turning red? Cute.” And her voice will be low, almost like she’s savoring how flustered she’s made you, her smirk a little more playful than usual.
♥︎ There are times when Sevika just sits back and watches you with a hint of admiration in her eyes. She’s well aware of the effect she has on you, and, despite herself, she enjoys it. Your crush makes her feel like she’s the most important person in your world, and that, in turn, makes her fall a little harder for you.
♥︎ When she’s feeling particularly bold, Sevika will tease you with, “You know, you’re cute when you’re trying to act all nonchalant about me. But I can tell you’re just waiting for me to make the first move, huh?”
♥︎ As much as Sevika acts like she’s unaffected by your adoration, the truth is, she’s just as into you as you are into her. You’re her weakness, and she knows it. Every glance, every smile, it only makes her want you more. And even though she tries to act like she’s got everything under control, you still have the power to make her heart race.
♥︎ Sevika might not always show it, but she’s still crushing on you in her own way. The way you look at her, like she’s the only one who matters, makes her feel something she can’t quite put into words—something she’s not used to feeling. And she’s not sure what to do with it, but she definitely isn’t ready to let go.
♥︎♡ Ambessa ♡♥︎
♥︎ Ambessa notices how you’re still nervous around her, and while she enjoys it, she doesn’t let it show too much. She’s used to being admired, but the way you act around her is different, and it’s something that amuses her in a quiet, private way.
♥︎ When she catches you staring, Ambessa smirks to herself before deliberately leaning into your line of sight, as if daring you to keep looking. She knows how you feel about her, and she likes it—likes the way you get lost in her gaze. She’ll look at you, her eyes dark and calculating, as if she knows exactly what you’re thinking.
♥︎ When she teases you about your nervousness, she does it in a soft, but commanding tone: “Careful, darling. If you keep looking at me like that, I might think you’ve fallen for me all over again.” She enjoys the slight power she holds over you and the way you blush at her words.
♥︎ Sometimes, Ambessa will purposely make you nervous just to see the way you react. She’ll brush her hand against yours casually, watching your breath hitch as she does, then she’ll let it linger just long enough to make you even more flustered.
♥︎ When you try to flirt with her and completely miss the mark, Ambessa won’t make you feel stupid about it, but she can’t resist a sly, teasing comment. “Is that supposed to be a compliment, darling? I’m sure you’ll get it right next time.” She’ll wink or smirk, not out of malice, but because she enjoys watching you try so hard.
♥︎ If you stammer over a simple “hello,” Ambessa will raise an eyebrow and look at you with that trademark, unbothered air of hers. “Careful now, darling. Don’t choke on your words,” she’ll tease, a sly smile curling at the corners of her lips.
♥︎ Despite her teasing, Ambessa secretly finds your nervousness endearing. It’s like she’s the only one who gets to see this side of you—the side that’s still so captivated by her, and that makes her feel oddly special, even if she doesn’t admit it aloud.
♥︎ Sometimes, when she’s in a particularly playful mood, Ambessa will deliberately drop a compliment that’s so smooth it’s almost unfair, just to watch your face light up and your nerves get the best of you. “You should smile more, darling. It suits you.”
♥︎ She doesn’t want to overwhelm you, but Ambessa enjoys the power she has over you. Every time you blush or get flustered, it feels like a small victory to her. But she’s not cruel about it—she’s just… amused.
♥︎ If you try to flirt with her directly, saying something even mildly suggestive, Ambessa will respond with calm confidence, “Is that your way of telling me you’re still interested? Because I’m already aware, darling.”
♥︎ When you’re around her and you get a little too shy, Ambessa will call you out with a laugh, “What’s wrong? Have I got you speechless now?” Her teasing tone is playful, but there’s a warmth there, almost like she’s enjoying the attention.
♥︎ When you attempt to play it cool and fail, she’ll keep her distance, letting you stew in your nervous energy before saying something cutting yet teasing: “You really don’t know how to handle yourself around me, do you?” But there’s always a glimmer of affection in her eyes.
♥︎ Ambessa has a knack for turning the tables, and she’ll use your nervousness to her advantage. If you get all flustered when she gets close, she’ll make it a point to stand or sit even closer to you, enjoying how you become even more tongue-tied and restless.
♥︎ If you get overly nervous and accidentally trip over your words, Ambessa will just chuckle softly, a sound so confident and knowing that it makes your heart race. “You’re adorable when you’re trying so hard,” she’ll say, and you’ll feel like a fool—but in the best possible way.
♥︎ When you nervously ask her a question, Ambessa will give you a patient, almost indulgent smile, her eyes locking onto yours as she waits for you to finish. When you get to the end, she’ll respond with a dry “Was that so hard?” to playfully remind you of how easily she can fluster you.
♥︎ If you smile at her without saying anything, Ambessa will step closer, lowering her voice so it’s just between the two of you. “You look at me like you want something, darling. Should I ask what that is?” Her voice is smooth, her presence commanding, and you can’t help but feel all the more enamored.
♥︎ When you try to act casual and fail, Ambessa will reach out with that cool, steady hand of hers to lightly graze your arm or shoulder. “Relax, darling. You don’t need to try so hard with me,” she’ll say, her tone both teasing and comforting.
♥︎ Ambessa has a tendency to playfully make you aware of how obvious you are. “You’ve been staring at me for minutes now, darling. Is there something you’d like to say?” She’ll keep her voice low and seductive, enjoying the way your face turns crimson under her gaze.
♥︎ If you get nervous in public, Ambessa will guide you through it, her hand on your back in a way that’s almost possessive. “Stop worrying, darling. You’re mine, and I’m not letting you embarrass yourself.” She’ll say it with quiet confidence, and that confidence rubs off on you.
♥︎ Ambessa doesn’t mind when you get nervous around her. In fact, she loves the attention. She enjoys watching you try to hide it and can’t help but be a little smug when you fail. It feeds her ego, but in a way that’s soft and almost… affectionate.
♥︎ When you shy away after a compliment, Ambessa will chuckle softly and take your chin in her hand, tilting your head back to look at her. “You should learn to accept compliments from me, darling. You’re going to hear a lot more of them.”
♥︎ If you smile too much when she’s around, Ambessa will pull you in close by the waist, just enough to make you feel her warmth against you. “You like looking at me, don’t you?” she’ll say with a sly smile. It’s her way of acknowledging how utterly captivating she finds your admiration.
♥︎ Ambessa loves that she’s the one who makes you smile uncontrollably. She’ll sometimes pause, watching you try to hide your giddiness, and then say in a low voice, “You’re adorable when you try to act serious around me.” It’s her way of letting you know how much she enjoys your affection.
♥︎ She’ll often pull you close for a brief, soft kiss when you’re least expecting it, just to remind you that she knows how you feel and that you don’t have to be so nervous around her. “Relax, darling. You’ve got me,” she’ll whisper in your ear afterward, her hands resting possessively on your hips.
#arcane#arcane x reader#arcane x female reader#arcane x you#arcane x y/n#ambessa headcanons#ambessa fluff#ambessa x you#ambessa x reader#arcane ambessa#ambessa arcane#ambessa medarda#ambessa medarda x reader#sevika x you#sevika imagine#sevika x y/n#sevika headcanon#sevika i love you#sevika arcane#arcane sevika#sevika x reader#sevika
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can i get one SMUT #45 with Quinn?
Thank you for requesting <3
SMUT #45 “Look what you did to me, I’ve had to deal with this all day.”
📞 dialling…
She stifled a giggle as soon as she heard his keys rattle in the door, putting the last of the dishes in the drying rack before folding the cloth over the oven handle. Quinn’s bag thudded from the entrance, his footsteps heavy along the wooden floor until eventually his hips thrust against her ass and his breath fanning over her neck. He slammed his hands on the counter either side of her, ensuring she could feel his erection and chest against her back. Y/n said nothing, she just smiled, a single giggle slipping out, feeling his heavy breathing behind her. He wasn’t mad, frustrated at most.
“You think it’s funny to send me shit like that while I’m working?” his voice was low, rumbly in her ear.
Turning her head ever so slightly to meet his eyes, she gave him something like an innocent smile, yet he knew well her little games. She replied, turning her whole body to face him, “I send you a lot of things, Quinner. What are you referencing?”
Y/n’s fingers found the strings of his hoodie, peering at him with doe-like eyes and excitement fizzling in her stomach as his gaze burned into her. Soft-spoken and calm Quinn was everything she wanted and more, yet there was something riveting when he was wound up. He asked for one thing from her, and that was to not send him risqué photos or videos while he was working, knowing he wouldn’t be able to compose himself and the pretty, lacy lingerie that hugged her perfectly had his cheeks flare up at the second he opened his phone. There was nothing worse than trying to escape the rink while his dick strained in his sweatpants, teammates and staff members trying to catch a few seconds to chat while he just needed to get home for some relief.
“Don’t get clever,” he took one of her hands and pressed it to his cock, releasing a shaky breath feeling the heat rush through him, “look what you did to me, I’ve had to deal with this all day. Do you need something, pretty girl? Because I can give it to you right here, right now.”
She only grinned, taking her bottom lip between her teeth slightly and palming him through his sweatpants, relishing his mouth falter and stifle back a noise, “Ah, so you did like the set. I don’t need anything, darling, I just wanted to know your opinion.”
He didn’t like the set, he adored it. The way it barely covered anything, the lace allowing her nipples to peek through, the panties complimenting the curve of her ass, the way she toyed with the bra strap in the video, pulling it off her shoulder for him and the worst part of the whole situation, the end where her voice - honey coated and airy - said his name while beginning to pull her panties down her hip, only for the video to cut off.
“You gonna help me out? I think you owe me that.” He dipped closer to her, kissing her neck lightly before placing a harder, wetter kiss to the skin, trailing along her column. She tilted her head to the side, giving him more access. Wildfires of tingly sensations spread to her stomach, his mouth moving slowly, meaningfully, working its way along the flesh to suck purple bruises in punishment to her actions.
Y/n released a low whine, hands tugging his sweatpants down his hips and dipping into his boxers, pulling his cock out with a gentle grip. She chuckled at his groan vibrating against her skin, giving him broad strokes from his base to his tip until he pulsed in her palm, driven by his grunts with every rub until the pad of her thumb met his tip. He clenched his stomach, hand gripping her ass and kneading roughly when she rubbed little circles over his slit, pussy throbbing feeling the pre-cum glide easily with her touches.
“Fuck-” he rasped into her ear, bucking his hips into her hand. He craved her touch, her soft touch when she slid her hand along him, pace speeding up the more he grunted and fell apart. He’d been needing it all day, all day since he watched that video and the locker room was no place for his activities, plus, he’d never bring himself to such a euphoric climax the way she could.
She tangled her fingers in his hair and pulled his face from her neck, colliding her lips with his passionately, slipping her tongue into his mouth and lapping at the muscle until the combined pleasure of making out and stroking his cock coaxed loud, elongated moans.
“Happy now, Captain? Better now you’re getting the attention?” she teased, lips brushing his with half-lidded eyes.
“Y/n, fuck-” something tightened in his stomach, something that was begging to claw its way out and spill over her hand, but it felt too good. Her hands just brought so much craving for a euphoric bliss. His eyes fluttered close, voice airy and strained like he was holding back to enjoy the coil tightening in his core longer, “faster, please, faster.”
She mocked a pout at him, only slowing down her strokes to languid motions, feeling his hands bruise her backside in desperation. She’d never seen him so needy in the years they’d known each other, but his whines falling from his mouth had heat pooling into her underwear and lips reconnecting with his again, giving him a bruising kiss and winding frenzied moans.
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"Perfect"
A/N:
-fyi guys, It's not spell checked, so please ignore any mistakes. <3
John Price x Reader
"Y'real lucky Cap, got y'self the perfect bird, dont' ya'?"
John rolled his eyes and clicked his tounge in annoyance, he had invited the rest of 141 over for dinner before going out to the pub down the street because he wanted to properly introduce you all.
Now, they had heard of you briefly in casual conversation and vice versa however they never met you, not formally at least, perhaps seeing each other in the halls of the base (when you can to drop of Price's lunch he so ~conveniently~ forgot about) but nothing more than that.
What the great John Price himself didn't forshadow was the way all of his team would fawn over you, yeah you were a doll, HIS doll, he was quickly getting annoyed by the amount of compliments they were giving you, Gaz's especially, so he did the onlybthing he knew to do, deflect.
"The lass has dolled her self up because we have company, normally shes slouching 'round the house, Gaz, they only ever looked like this in the begining, ya know, so dont let yourself be fooled, y'know how the girls are these days,"
What he didn't account for in his little outburst was the effect his words would have on you, who was waiting outside the door...
-----------------------------------------
You had always had problems with your looks, always feeling inferior, comparing yourself to others never feeling enough. It was a habit that stemmed from your mother, and her constant need to nitpick at everything little thing about you.
It then progressed to your constant need to be "perfect". To always look presentable no matter who or what was going to be there. A full face of makeup, hair done, and outfit hiding whatever you deemed to be the "problem" parts of you today.
You never trusted anyone enough to show yourself in these moments where you didn't deem yourself to be presentable enough. Always terrified of being judged or ridiculed by someone else just like you did yourself. Always terrified that someone would validate your fears of not being enough.
Thats why when John had first asked you out you thought he was joking, you looked around trying to find his group of friends snickering between themselves. You didn't, of course, but that still didn't stop your hesitation, nor did your hesitation stop his determination.
I mean can you blame him? You were gorgeous standing there in the grocery line looking like the perfect little house wife, sweet and kind, how could you not expecting him to snatch you up before anyone else had the chance.
He was an amazing boyfriend constantly telling you how much he loved you, how beautiful you looked, how loved you were.
He was the first person you managed to be properly comfortable around, able to be less "perfect", you thought that he never judged you for it.
That's why as you when you began to walk to the dining room with a tray of freshly baked lasagne in hand, you were horrified to hear your boyfriend, the one person who you thought didn't care how you looked around him, the one person that made you feel loved. Telling his friends how you "fooled" him into dating you and you were not as "perfect" as you used to be.
In all honesty, you wish you were more shocked. That this senario hadn't played through you head countless times before that you hadn't had a small voice in the back of your mind telling you how you didn't deserve him, how he was only still dating you out of pity.
You had hoped that it would never happen, that it was all just made up in your head. You wished in that very moment that this was all a dream that you could wake up and find John besides you, not talking about you negatively but instead kissing your forehead softly before leaving for the base.
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But that wasn't the case, you weren't dreaming, he wasn't waking you up sweetly by kissing you on th forehead, and the rest of your boyfriends squad was sitting in the room infront of you.
You had no time to think about that, you needed to be "perfect".
���The "perfect" girlfriend.
•The "perfect" host.
•The "perfect" person.
Always kind and caring, always looking "perfect"...
Before you knew it you were stepping through the threshold of the door to the dining room, a "perfect" smile plastered on your face, your body going through the motions. Your mind was racing but you can't let it show on your face, you have to be "perfect"
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You...you, HAD to be... you had nothing else to give, no matter how many times John has compliment you, no matter how many times he told you, that you were enough it's obvious you weren't because if you were then why was he saying that?? Why would he be saying you weren't good enough??
You had let yourself get too comfortable, too happy, you had lost your control, you had forgotten that you needed to be "perfect". You felt sorry for John, he had to deal with you when you weren't.
No wonder he was complaining! It's okay, though, you can fix it. You can ALWAYS fix it. John won't need to feel cheated, like you fooled or tricked him. You just need to get back into your routine.
You just need to be perfect again...
#john price#price x reader#angst#task force 141#tf 141#captain price#john price x reader#john price x you#Kettle
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It had been a grueling 48-hour mission, the kind that left you sore in places you didn’t even know existed. But there you were, walking across the darkened compound with the rest of the team, carrying the weight of a job well done. The silence between you all was heavy, save for the occasional grunt or sigh from the other soldiers.
You weren’t really sure how you felt about your current position. You were a soldier, but you were also something more—always having to prove yourself in a male-dominated field. You’d been through it all, the mockery, the doubts, but you’d earned your place. Still, you couldn’t shake the feeling that some of the men you worked with still saw you as the new kid, regardless of your combat experience.
Then there was Ghost. Simon Riley. You knew his reputation before you’d ever set foot on this team. The cold, brooding soldier with a sharp edge and an even sharper wit. He didn’t seem like the kind of guy to care much about anyone, but he had a knack for seeing through you. No one could read you the way he could.
And that’s when it happened.
The squad was gathered, unloading the gear, taking a break, when Simon, ever the enigma, suddenly shot you a glance. It was just a quick look, one that seemed to linger longer than necessary. Then, with a slight tilt of his head, he did it.
The bastard winked at you.
Your breath caught in your throat, and for a split second, you didn’t know whether to laugh or punch him in the arm. The audacity. You fought the grin tugging at your lips, focusing on your pack instead.
“Don’t let it get to you, Sergeant,” he said, voice muffled by his mask, but there was no mistaking the smirk that came through.
“Get to me?” you repeated, trying to keep your composure. “You’re real cute, Ghost.”
He stepped closer, his imposing frame blocking the light overhead. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“Sure, if you want to keep thinking that.”
He let out a low chuckle, the sound rumbling from deep in his chest. “Don’t act like you didn’t enjoy it.”
You glared at him. “You’re insufferable.”
“That’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me all day.”
And just like that, you were sucked into his orbit. For all the tension, for all the unspoken words, there was something about his presence that was oddly comforting. Sure, he was a bastard, but he was your bastard.
Later that night, while the team was celebrating their success, you found yourself on the balcony of the safehouse, staring out into the distance, lost in thought.
"You know, you looked like you were going to explode back there," Simon said, his voice cutting through the quiet.
You turned to face him. He leaned against the railing, arms crossed. "What can I say? You’re annoying."
"Come on," he said with a grin. "Admit it. You liked the wink."
You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t suppress the smile that tugged at your lips. "I liked the part where I almost punched you."
He chuckled, stepping closer. "Careful, Sergeant. You might start giving me ideas."
You met his gaze, the teasing energy still crackling between you two, but there was something else now—something that didn’t need to be spoken.
"You're lucky I like you, Riley," you said, leaning against the railing beside him.
He raised an eyebrow, his voice dropping lower. "Oh, I know."
The bastard had a way of making everything feel like a game, but in that moment, you realized you didn’t mind the challenge. Not one bit.
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#writers on tumblr#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x oc#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley x female oc#simon ghost riley x female reader#simon riley x female reader#cod x reader#ghost cod#ghost#fluff
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Dress- YJW
warnings: NSFW| dirty talk, semi-public sex, choking(only a little), MDNI 18+
You knew as soon as Jungwon stepped through the door today that you were about to have an interesting night. For one, he was in a much better mood than he normally was after work and secondly, he was clingier with you than usual. Not to say he was ever in a bad mood when he came home but today it was different. He hadn’t let you out of his sight once since he got home, immediately wrapping you in his arms for a hug and planting a kiss on your lips. You two stood like that for a while just enjoying being with each other. But every time you tried to walk away to continue with what you were doing he’d just pull you back into him and pout whenever you tried to leave. “Baby no don’t move please. wanna hold you, missed you so much today”. You never could deny him when he started asking so nicely. “Wonie, what has gotten into you today? Is everything okay”? At that he finally released his hold on you and walked into the next room. You followed him just a little confused about what he was doing. “I’m perfect baby, just missed you is all. Hey, I’ve got an idea, let’s go out tonight. We can get all dressed up and go out for drinks and then go have dinner”. You had to admit, the idea did sound nice, it would give you a chance to actually spend time with your boyfriend which is something you hadn’t gotten to do much of recently. “That sounds like a lot of fun baby. But are you sure everything is okay? You seem different today”. He simply turned to you, smiled and winked before answering “I’m fine baby, I promise. Just wanna take my pretty girl out on the town and spoil her”.
You’d never seen Jungwon get ready as fast as he did tonight. He was showered and dressed within 30 minutes leaving you to take your time. Eventually you had to lock him out of your room because he was starting to become a distraction. It had started with him sitting on the bed watching you with what you can only describe as a predatory look in his eyes. Then when you weren’t looking he had come up behind you placing little kisses up and down your neck. “You look so beautiful princess. Can’t believe how lucky I am to have you”. You turn around quickly dodging his embrace “Jungwon baby thank you but I need you to go away. If you want us to actually leave the house you need to let me get ready in peace”. He walked backwards towards the door putting both of his hands up in surrender “sorry baby, I’ll leave you to get ready in peace” and with that he closed the door behind him. You felt a tiny bit bad for kicking him out of your room like that so you thought you’d reward him later for being so good to you.
Once you had finished getting ready, you walk out to the living room to grab your jacket signaling that you were ready to go. Before you could go anywhere Jungwon looked up at you letting out a wolf whistle “damn my baby looks gorgeous for me”. No matter how many times he complimented you it always made you blush. “Thank you baby, dressed up just for you”. Jungwon was really starting to regret his suggestion to go out, not that he didn’t want to take you out and spoil you, he just really wanted to fuck you more. One look at him told you that. “Hm, I'm the luckiest man in the world, baby. We should get going now yeah”?
The entire ride from your place to the bar was one filled with tension, you were both displaying extraordinary amounts of restraint so as not to jump each other's bones in the back of the cab. The bar Jungwon took you to was very fancy and in a great neighborhood. He was able to steal you two a booth tucked away in the corner. Over the course of your time at the bar you two may have been drinking more than was planned originally. You two weren’t drunk by any means but you weren’t exactly sober either. But the thing that always seemed to happen when you two were tipsy was that you both became less aware of your surroundings and more aware of each other. The touches started out innocent, but quickly became lingering. Eventually that meant Jungwon placing a hand on your thigh, inching it up ever so slightly. If you were sober it might’ve been nearly imperceptible but the slow drag of his palm against your skin made you feel like you were on fire. Without the watchful eyes of anyone else he leaned in and started kissing you, pulling back just enough for it to appear innocent from the outside. “Baby, you look so sexy for me. Can hardly control myself right now”. You didn’t want him to either, one word from either of you and he’d have taken you right then and there even if you were in public. You grab his hand slowly inching it in between your thighs but stopping it inches away from the intended destination. He tries to move his hand so he can finally touch you the way he’d been wanting to all night. “Do you wanna know a secret”? He was hoping you’d say you wanted him just as much as he wanted you. “Tell me”. You pull him into you leaning forward just enough to place a delicate bite on his ear lobe “I’m not wearing any panties”. Once you said that, you released your hold on his wrist. With absolutely no hesitation he moved his hand just enough to come in contact with your pussy. He started to touch you albeit with less urgency than he normally would’ve had. “You do this for me baby”? Your only answer was a nod of your head. “Get your things, we’re going”.
Jungwon was eerily silent the entire ride home, you thought maybe there was the slightest chance he was mad at you for doing that, but what you didn’t know was that he was trying to control himself. But it was another story once he got out of the cab, he was perfectly fine waiting until you had gotten up to your apartment but then when you moved to step out of the cab he saw the briefest flash of your bare pussy and he lost all semblance of control. When you had entered the lobby of your apartment building he did a quick glance around to make sure no one was out there before he dragged you into the stare well. You had no time to protest before he had you pushed up against the wall. “Fuck baby, you’re so dirty leaving the house without any panties on”. Before you could wrap your mind around what was happening Jungwon snuck his hand up your dress wasting no time finding your clit and rubbing it. He’s quick to throw his hand over your mouth, silencing any moans that were threatening to slip out. He’s quick to grab your leg and hitch it up before he starts fucking two fingers into you. “So wet for me baby, was this what you had in mind when you chose not to wear any panties tonight”? All you were physically able to do was nod your head. He’d kept the pace of his fingers slow and steady, you surmised it was to work you up further. Just as he’s finally started to pick the pace up he’s quick to pull his hand out of your dress at the sound of someone walking down the stairs.
Before you two could get caught he pulled you out of the stare well and back into the lobby. You knew one look at you two would show how flushed you were and how hard Jungwon was in his pants. The wait for the elevator was torturous, Jungwon was all but flush against your back trying to hide the hard on he was sporting. You two were lucky enough to get an empty elevator. As soon as the doors close Jungwon is back on you once again, trapping you in the corner of the elevator and kissing you like a man starved. You knew your time in the elevator was coming to an end so you snuck your hand in between the two of you and palmed him over his pants. The way his hips immediately start rocking into your hand leaves you both dizzy. If you had the time you would’ve gotten on your knees and given him the best head of his life right there for everyone to see. Instead what you do is pop open the button on his pants and push them down just enough to pull his cock out. You can tell he’s taken aback by the sudden movement. He tries to stop your movements but you’re too quick, taking him in your hand. Your movements are quick and slightly impatient setting a punishing pace for him. “Fuck baby, we can’t do this here, anyone could see”. He was such a hypocrite, having had no issue fingering you in the stare well where anyone could’ve seen you two at any moment. “Hm but do you really want me to stop”? His hips had started to grind forward creating more friction for him. “No please don’t”. That’s what you thought. Taking a page out of his book you speed up your movements and start whispering into his ear, which is a move he always made on you. “Baby, you have no idea how much I need you to fuck me right now”. As he goes to speak the elevator stops, Jungwon is quick to tuck himself into his pants pulling you in front of him to hide what had been going on. He does this in just enough time before someone steps into the elevator. The air is awkward between you two, you could tell by his body language Jungwon was irritated.
You’d no sooner walked into your apartment before Jungwon had you pushed up against it bringing his hand up to wrap ever so slightly around your neck. “Did you think that was funny baby? Answer me”. You should’ve known you wouldn’t get away with your stunt back in the elevator. “Just wanted to make you feel good baby”. He doesn’t buy it for one second, scoffing while tightening the grip on your neck. “Should make you get on your knees for me baby, but I’m too impatient for that. Need to fuck you now”. He takes his hand off your throat to undo his pants and take his cock back out. He’s too impatient to undress you, opting to push your dress up around your hips. He picks you up, wrapping your legs around him. He’s about to push into you before you grab his hand and move it back to your throat. He’d only ever choked you a couple of times, each at your request but never during sex. He’d never be able to put into words how much he liked when you asked him to choke you. He pushes into you, bottoming out in one swift motion. He’d normally wait for you to adjust to him but the way your pussy is sucking him in he can’t find it in himself to care. His pace is so fast that you can’t catch your breath. But it’s also so good that you don’t care about anything else but the way his cock feels inside of you. “Am I fucking you good baby”? You were shocked he even needed to ask you that, especially with the way you were moaning for him. “You- fuck- you always fuck me good baby. Can’t get enough of your cock”. You aren’t sure how he still has the energy to fuck you against the door when he’s pistoning into you how he is. “Always so good at taking my cock baby. Been waiting to fuck you all night”. You’re all but screaming his name at this point, overwhelmed by everything, by the drag of his cock inside of you and how good he smells up close. You’re overwhelmed by the way he’s looking at you and with the sweat starting to drip off of his hair. In short, you’re overwhelmed by him. “Fuck Jungwon, I’m gonna cum, you’re gonna make me cum baby”. His hips falter at that, a telltale sign he himself is about to finish. “Gonna cum too baby. Where do you want me”?
You’re so far gone that when you babble out your answer to him you miss his reaction. “Cum inside me please, it’s okay”. You two had never had sex raw before, even though you were on the pill it just never got brought up. “Princess wants me to cum inside her huh? Fuck- you’re gonna take what I give you then”. With a few more sloppy thrusts Jungwon buries his face into your neck letting out the most sinful moans before cumming inside of you. As soon as he pulls out of you, he all but collapses on the floor pulling you with him. You two lay there for a few minutes trying to catch your breath. Jungwon is content in that moment, but he knows that he’s nowhere near done with you tonight. “What got into you tonight Wonie”? He himself isn’t even sure, he just knows when he saw you once he got home from work that he needed to fuck you good and hard. “You got into me baby. Don’t tell me you didn’t like it. I felt how wet you were at the bar”. He had you there. You were just as insatiable as he was. But before you could go to answer he’s flipped you around so he’s laying on top of you. He leaves kisses down your neck slowly moving his way down your body. “Hmm baby, I’m sorry we didn’t get to dinner tonight. But I’m going to have to insist we skip straight to dessert”. With that, your night was about to get a lot more fun.
#kpop fanfic#kpop scenarios#kpop writers#enhypen#enhypen fanfiction#enhypen fic#enha jungwon#enhypen smut#enhypen jungwon#yang jungwon#jungwon smut#jungwon#jungwon enhypen#enha smut#kpop smut
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i love art student danny im begging for more🙏 literally anythinh
Welcome Notti's "Not So Innocent" Notebook where I write some filth to make your Friday a little bit better <3 || 18+ mdni pls and ty
an: can this be classed as filth? i don't know. NONNIE, I AM GONNA BE SO HONEST WITH YOU, THIS ASK MOTIVATED ME TO FINISH THIS SO TYSM<3<3 this was originally going to be called "Crude Drawing Of An Angel" but i couldn't commit to a full fic, sorry! :(
The droning bell signalling the next period droned over Daniel’s campus. The lights were dim in the typically busy art department in his college. All the students had left after the lesson had ended, but here he still was, with you sitting pretty on his lap.
He didn’t understand why he was so nervous about it. You’d done this numerous times before, just when you actually had clothes on. Adjusting his glasses, he pushed them up the bridge of his nose before exhaling deeply, feeling the breath fan against his face slightly from his nostrils.
Maybe it was because you’d given him your time of day. You were special to him, not like he’d fully tell you that, as you’d been becoming his muse subtly. The way he hid his sketches around you explained that in more ways than others. Danny was used to just hiding in the shadows of the college art studio, left to his own devices to doodle in his crisp sketchbook or to play around with a new set of oils he’d bought due to him running low, but not this.
He’d completed many real-life pieces beforehand, but that was using models as references out of an odd Playboy magazine he used to keep hidden from his parents before he’d moved on campus. But having one on his lap? So intimately too? It was enough to make him drunk on the intense nerves he was feeling.
“Have you never had a naked lady on your lap before?” you whispered smoothly, eyebrow raised as your bare tits brushed against his clothed chest. Lazy arms rested on his shoulders, a knowing smile on your face as Danny looked on edge, unsure on where to place his own frantic palms to keep you stable in his lap.
Danny’s face fully flushed at the question, breathing hitched before he chuckled awkwardly, flashing a bashful smile that revealed his shiny braces whilst his brown doe eyes studied your own features. He let the question simmer in his mind for a moment, a gulp following as he tried to remove the embarrassment growing in his throat.
“N-No. Never,” a croaky voice replied, stuttering and fumbling on his words as his growing nervousness became more palpable.
“First time, huh,” you mumbled, a soft hand trailing from his shoulder to cupping his burning cheek with a smirk. “Makes sense why you’re so jittery then,” you added, brushing a soothing thumb over the scorching apple, making Danny divert his gaze elsewhere meekly.
He swallowed timidly again, squeezing his eyes shut briefly, his Adam’s apple bobbing slightly at the harsh gulp. Bashful and fidgety hands moved to hold your bare torso’s sides ever too tightly, nails piercing the flesh, as the grip on your body felt like a clammy vice.
Giggling softly at his skittish body language, you couldn’t help but feel a flutter of cuteness in your stomach. He really was a nervous thing. “You’re so cute, Danny,” the compliment rolled off of your tongue sweetly, your thumb coming down to trail his freshly shaven jawline. “All bashful like this…” you trailed off, thumb now pressing against his bottom lip with a gentle ease, “makes me wanna keep you like this forever,” you continued with another small, giddy smile.
He didn’t dare look at you. If anything, he didn’t know where to look. Did he look at your bare tits or at your face? Both ideas made his brain fuzzy— a flurry of frantic thoughts jumbling together— and his insides jump with excitement.
Danny was painfully hard. The tension of his erection in the confines of his boxers didn’t help. It was embarrassing, really. How the hell did someone get hard from a woman just sitting on their lap? His giddiness was the equivalent of a horny teenager having their first partner kiss them for the first time, and if anything, that made him more cuter in your eyes.
“Someone’s a bit excited,” you giggled, eyes flicking down to his clothed hardness before looking back down at his face from above. His eyes had followed yours, as your hand came to guide his gaze back up on your own when you cupped his jaw, flashing a knowing smile.
“I-I’m not!” He protested, practically blurting the words out in desperation but failing miserably to convince you. “I’m just not used to it, that’s all,” he added with another bashful mumble, his doe gaze fixed on yours.
“Keep telling yourself that, Danny,” you teased lightheartedly with a small scoff. “I bet if I whispered in your ear right now that you looked beautiful, you’d come in your boxers,” you added with a smug smile, to which Danny replied with wide eyes. “Or maybe if I taught you how to touch my breasts properly you would too?”
“I mean, is that really necessary? I don’t—” Danny messed up his words dramatically, his cheeks pricked a deep crimson colour as you looked down at him with that cheeky glimpse in your eye. “—think it’s necessary, that’s all,” he tried to protest again with a low voice as slow hands came to place his hands on your soft breasts, the intimacy of the action electric.
“That’s better,” you mumbled quietly, half-lidded eyes darkening at the sight. “Such a good boy for me, aren’t you, Danny?”
“Y-yes,” he muttered almost instantly, following your eyes so intently. Such a good boy for you, following your every movement like an eager little puppy. It made you adore him more really, he was useless like this, and that’s what made it endearing.
Danny shifted uncomfortably on his stool, the stifling hardness of his erection fighting his boxers was becoming torturous. It created some friction that made you gasp softly on your own part, before you giggled at Danny’s discomfort.
“Who knew you could get hard just from looking at a naked woman, Danny?” you teased, giggling as you came down to rest your lips against the shell of his ear. “You look so pathetic right now,” the purr rolled off of your tongue so intoxicatingly for Danny, as his thumbs came to graze against your nipples almost hesitatingly.
You gave him the nod of affirmation, and almost instantly he started to roll his thumbs in circular motions until your nipples became hardened peaks. Danny could feel his body burning with an overwhelming passion he’d never felt before. Something about touching a bare body for the first time made him ever so pathetically aroused, and God did it look good on him.
“Good boy, Danny,” you praised ever so seductively into his ear, hot breath hitting it ever so harshly. “Just like that, mhm, that’s right,” you added whenever he stopped, (a subtle prompt for him not to stop) to which he quickly started to do the motions again.
His hips started to buck pathetically as he whined when you pressed a searing kiss onto his mouth. You began to move with him, his trembling hands still groping your breasts with a sort of palpable passion now. It was no doubt that he was close to coming, the way his movements became desperate and erratic was in no doubt because he was chasing his inevitable release.
Tongues twisted together in your mouths as you silenced his moans when they dissipated from you two making out with each other. You devilishly smiled as you felt his head tilt back and his eyes shut whilst you trailed your kisses down his neck. He groaned out in his response, a guttural one, as he became overwhelmed whilst riding out his high.
Panting as you tried to gain some composure at the same time as Danny, you laughed breathlessly as you looked down at him again, removing your lips from his neck. “Did you just come in your boxers?” you asked whilst amazed that he’d actually come in his boxers as Danny’s eyes widened at the uncomfortable stickiness he was now sitting in.
“For fuck’s sake…” Danny muttered, laughing meekly. “I’m sorry, I just got carried—”
“No, Danny,” you cut him off, pressing your pointer fingers against his lips. “That was fucking hot”, you continued, before letting your hand rest against your side.
“I-It was?!” He exclaimed dumbfounded, eyes wide as his breathing was still a little unsteady. “Yes, it was,” you murmured, brushing a gentle hand against the side of his face. “And next time we’re like this…” you whispered against his lips, “I’m going to make you even more excited so you come harder.”
like art student!danny? fancy sending me an ask so you can be included in my notebook! - notti <3
#art student!danny#notti's nonnies#notti answers#nottivagos#f1#f1 scenarios#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 x reader#daniel ricciardo#daniel ricciardo fanfic#daniel ricciardo imagine#daniel ricciardo smut#daniel ricciardo x reader#dr3 fic#dr3#dr3 x reader#danny ric x you#danny ric imagine#danny ric#danny ric x reader#one shot#formula one#formula 1#formula one fic#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 fic
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Wedding Nerves – Glen Powell
Glen and I met over two years ago. We dated for a year and a half before he asked me to marry him. After the planning and rescheduling due to Glen's filming schedule, we finally were getting married today. I finished my makeup and hair before my bridesmaids helped me get into my dress. When everything was done, I slowly walked toward them.
"You look gorgeous!" My maid of honor giggled. I couldn't help but spin around.
My bridal party started giving me compliments and fixing little things. Suddenly, we were interrupted by a sporadic knock on the door.
"I'll get it!" My maid of honor said, still smiling. When she went to get the door, I couldn't hear them at first. The only thing I heard was, "We have to tell her!"
"Tell me what?" I asked as I walked towards the door. I froze when I saw Jeff, Glen's best man, standing in the doorway. "Jeff, what's wrong?"
"Y/N," he sighed as he jogged toward me and gently grabbed my hands.
"What's wrong?" I asked, my heart now in my throat. "What's happened? Is it Glen? Is he okay? Where is he?"
"We don't know."
I pulled my hands out of his and took a step back. "What do you mean?" I asked, my voice soft. "Jeff, where is Glen?"
"I have every groomsman looking for him," he tried to reassure.
"Glen's gone?!"
I covered my mouth and turned away when all my bridesmaids walked into the front room and started panicking. Between angry threats and overly reassuring comments, it got too much. I struggled to decide whether to scream, cry, throw up, or all three. Before I could really decide, Jeff's phone started ringing.
"Hello?" He answered instantly. "Really? That's great."
"What's great?" I asked.
"Adam found him," Jeff explained, still holding his phone to his ear.
"Where is he?"
"He's on the beach. Adam is going to. . ."
I didn't wait for him to finish. Instead, I turned and ran out the sliding glass door that opened to the beach. I searched the beach and the second I saw him, I sprinted toward him.
I slowed down when I got close. It was then that I saw him on the beach, in his suit, running his fingers through his hair, and murmuring to himself. I completely stopped when I was about six feet from him.
"Glen?"
He instantly spun around when I said his name. "Y/N," he gasped.
"What are you doing out here?" I asked, my voice breaking. "Are you. . . Are you leaving me?"
"No!" He said quickly. He closed the gap between us and grabbed my hands. "I would never ever leave you, darling."
"The guys couldn't find you," I started to nervously ramble. "And they came and told me. I'm not sure why Jeff told me, but he did. Maybe it's because we're getting married in an hour. . . Or we were supposed to get married in an hour."
"Y/N," he gently cut me off. "I didn't mean for. . . I wasn't going to. . . I told Jeff that I was going for a walk and would be back. I guess he got nervous. I am so sorry, baby."
"Will you please tell me what's going on?" I asked, my voice breaking.
"I wasn't overthinking you," he said firmly. "I wasn't doubting my love for you. I was doubting me."
"What are you talking about? Glen, you're scaring me."
"I'm really sorry, honey," he sighed. "I've been thinking about our life together and. . . Wow. You look so beautiful."
I let out a small giggle when Glen just now realized I was in my dress. He smiled as his eyes went back up to mine. "You are even more gorgeous than I pictured you'd be."
He pulled me and pressed a gentle kiss to my lips. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him back. Until I remembered where we were and where we should be.
"Glen," I whispered, breaking the kiss. "Please just tell me what's going on because all I can do is think about how you're going to leave me at the altar."
He tightened his arms around my waist but the look in his eyes slightly faltered. "I couldn't sleep last night," he finally started to explain. "It wasn't because I couldn't marry you. It's because. . . I kept thinking about my career. It's already kept us apart for half of our engagement. I constantly go out of town, leaving you behind. My career is going to interfere with our life."
"It won't."
"But. . ."
"But nothing," I cut him off. I gently grabbed his face as I added, "You will not let it happen, Glen. Sweetheart, we have battled your filming schedule since we first started dating. Once we were engaged, we still made time for each other. Once we are married, nothing is going to change."
"My job takes me away from you," he tried to counter.
"I'll come visit you," I shrugged. "And we'll Facetime every night, call every day during lunch, and text constantly."
"Most of my movies have me kissing and filming love scenes with other women," he said, avoiding my eyes. I grabbed his chin and made him look at me.
"I know you love me," I said firmly. "I know that kissing those other women means nothing to you. I know that I am the most important woman in your life. I know you love me and would never break my heart."
I stood on my toes and pressed my lips to his. He tightened his arms around my waist as he roughly kissed me back. We broke the kiss, both of us breathing heavily.
"I'm sorry I made you worry," he whispered, his forehead pressed to mine. He leaned back and added, "I got worried that I wouldn't be a good husband to you."
"You are going to be an amazing husband, Glen," I whispered back. "You have taken care of me since the moment we first met."
"I'll always take care of you, Y/N," he said with a playful chuckle, finally turning back into the Glen I first met and fell in love with. He leaned in and pressed another kiss to my lips. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he pulled me closer.
"So," I giggled, breaking the kiss, "are you ready to spend the rest of your life with me?"
"Yeah," Glen chuckled, "I am."
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Kon x M'gann HC's Part 2 Pretty Please with All the Fixings?
Loving the story.
Alrighty! Part 2!
So, to start off, I’ll just ramble a bit more about M’gann and Kon’s dynamic, then finish up the story :) Also posting this again because I think it turned out SO GOSH DARN CUTE! X3 (P.S. listen to “Bewitched” or “Serendipity” by Laufy. I feel like it captures the ✨ vibes ✨)
So it’s no surprise, after reading part 1, that Kon’s biggest flaw is that he’s very immature. He can get pouty and possessive when M’gann is paying attention to someone else, or when she’s gone for a while. He’s also a bit of an attention seeker, and he loves compliments and positive reinforcement of any kind. The first time M’gann gave him a kiss on the cheek, his world changed forever. Pretty sure it took the other guys about five minutes to snap him out of it. But, thankfully, as the story goes on, Kon gets a crash-course in a lot of things, including curbing his immaturity. He learns that you’re not supposed to roughhouse with girls (unless they’re comfortable with that sort of thing, and even then, don’t hurt them—super-strength and all), and he learns that sometimes M’gann is gonna pay attention to other people or go away for a little while and that’s normal and he doesn’t need to be overly upset about it. (He still pouts and misses her, though. It can’t be helped.) But the thing that he still has a problem with, to this day, is being a bit too aggressive when it comes to defending M’gann. The first time they met another Martian who was horribly rude to her, Kon almost brought out the laser eyes! Like, that dude would have been dust in the wind if the other TT hadn’t stepped in. Kon just can’t stand the idea of anyone hating M’gann, and for such a superficial reason no less! She’s beautiful and should be treated like she’s beautiful! (His words, not mine :) Ultimately, Kon HAS to keep himself in check on that account or else he risks starting an interplanetary war, but boy it’s hard.
M’gann sometimes falls back on her old habits and becomes a “yes woman,” agreeing to everything Kon wants to do even if she secretly wants to do something else. Cassie and Steph are the first to take notice of this behaviour, and help teach her to say “no.” If she’s uncomfortable, Kon isn’t gonna realise it on his own unless she tells him. She’s got to learn to put her foot down on things or she’s gonna be miserable. So M’gann practises this and other types of conversation in front of her mirror at night, and the first time she ever said no to one of Kon’s ideas, she felt so proud of herself! She wouldn’t stop smiling for the whole day! Kon had no idea why she was so happy, but when she was happy, he was happy, so it was a good day all the way around.
The dates they like to go on involve taking long walks around Earth. Neither of them had ever seen an ocean before, so they went to go see the ocean. Neither of them had ever been to a cheese factory before, so they went to go see a cheese factory and got free cheese curds on the way out. Then they went to a real baseball game and ate real hotdogs—they went to a museum (which M’gann liked more than Kon did, but they made it fun in the end)—they went on hikes, marvelling at all the different types of trees and bushes and butterflies and spiders and ants and birds and they even spotted a deer in the distance—and all the while, they would take pictures. So. Many. Pictures. M’gann has this old-school Martian camera and puts photo albums together of all the stuff she and Conner do together, like they’re already an old married couple. lol. Then, of course, when both of them are too tired to go out anywhere, they curl up on the couch and watch some of those old sitcoms M’gann grew up on. M’gann’s favourite is “That Girl” and Kon’s is “Hogan’s Heroes.”
Okay, now I’ve thoroughly set up how much fun they had together, time to make it all come crumbling down.
In the last post I said that Kon kept M’gann’s secret about being a white Martian and her past from the NTT and the JLA, but there was one person he was obligated to tell: Lex Luthor. Being that he was secretly working for the bald maniac, and it was his job to report in with any new information he’d learned, he had no choice. Even when he tried to lie or exclude details, Luthor grew suspicious of him and forced the info out of him. So when the reveal of his betrayal happened, it was so much worse for M’gann. Lex used what he had learned to help take her down, and also create a rift between her and Kon, because he wasn’t supposed to be getting attached to M’gann anyway. Kon was ordered to forget about her because he was never going to see her ever again, and M’gann wanted to forget Kon for sharing her most sacred secret. Not to mention, he had been lying to her from the start about his past, about his intentions, and who knows what else. Had he been using her to get information about the Justice League? About her uncle? Yes, he had, and he wanted to tell M’gann that he was ashamed of what he had done, but Lex wouldn’t let them be in the same room, so M’gann was left to think all sorts of awful things about him. It was a dismal day. This event is covered in full in another post which I will link below.
Now, of course, this story has a happy ending (because happy endings are the best kind of endings). Lex is eventually defeated, Kon is freed from him and LexCorp, and for once he gets to call the shots in his life. The first is going to M’gann and trying to make things up to her in any way he can. Now, at this point, M’gann knows that Lex was twisting Kon’s arm to a certain extent, so her anger is a little softened, but she still feels like an idiot for trusting him so easily, and she’s nervous about trusting him again. He’s still such an immature person—who knows what kind of big mistake he’ll make next?
Kon plucks up his courage and makes a traditional Martian apology to her—the big ceremonial kind meant for state officials and royalty when they’ve severely messed up something BIG—and begs her to give him one more chance. He knows full well that he’s a bit of a dunce when it comes to girls and Earth culture and even being a good person (again, his words) but he wants to be a better friend, he wants to be a good hero, and more than anything else he wants to be the best boyfriend he could possibly be for her. When he was making his decision to finally stand up against Lex, he was afraid of what Lex would do to him… but then he thought of M’gann. He remembered how much she meant to him, and that Lex was planning on hurting her as a part of his evil scheme, and even if it meant Lex would go ahead and terminate him and make another clone, he didn’t care. M’gann mattered more. And she always would. So, with all of this before her, M’gann was quite stunned, to say the least. For a moment, she didn’t know what to say. Given the fact that Kon had partaken in much of Lex’s plan willingly, the JLA agreed that some form of punishment was only fair, so it had been decided that Kon would spend a year on the Kent farm, essentially doing community service by helping them with all the chores. He would be confined to the property during all of that time, too, so the two of them were going to spend the next year in different places. M’gann hesitantly answered Kon’s apology with a “Maybe… I could write to you… and we’ll see where it goes from there.”
Kon was so happy. He plowed through all his chores on the Kent farm each and every day—Ma and Pa, and sometimes Clark when he had the time—would teach him things and show him to do stuff, like carpentry. And then, every day he’d go and check the mailbox, waiting for a letter from M’gann, and when he’d get one, he’d race up to his room (Clark’s old room) and read it ten times over. Then he’d grab a paper and pen and write his response, filling her in on all the things that had happened on the farm the last week or so. They wrote to each other non-stop that year, eagerly, patiently waiting for Kon’s sentence to be up. And when it had been a full year, and Kon came back to the city and the NTT, he and M’gann went for a walk in the park, and without saying a word, they both knew… there was no one else they’d rather spend the rest of their life with.
(Then the picture is from a little party the gang threw in celebration of their victories over all their villains, including Lex, and everyone was encouraged to wear their home country’s traditional garb, and maybe even bring some traditional food or a traditional party game. It was a fun night, and M’gann and Conner got to see each other dressed up for the first time (probably. I haven’t written out each individual episode for the NTT yet, but I like to imagine this is the first time ☺️))
Part 1 👇
Kon’s backstory is included in this post… 👇
#art#fan art#dc#dc comics#teen titans#the new teen titans#m’gannxconner#m’gann m’orzz#miss martian#conner kent#kon el#superboy#miss martian x superboy
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c09709e33f033265cc0cfb0b062f2472/c489c771258de1e5-8a/s540x810/23ad078cce9d5a07ba553a77dbcd6379ab18a87f.jpg)
Take Me to Church
Chapter 4: Losing My Religion
Kim Dongyoung x Reader
Word Count: 6,510
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut, Small town AU
Rating: Explicit. MINORS DNI!
Summary: As Y/N's due date draws near, new friends enter her life, and old ones leave.
Content Warnings: Cheating, religious themes, pregnancy, toxic parents, Reader gets called a whore, smut (making out, oral, dirty talk). If you think I missed a warning, please let me know!
A/N: This is part 4 of the "Take Me to Church" series! If you would like to be tagged for the last part of this series, you can fill out my taglist form here. If you'd like to catch up on the rest of the series, check out the masterlist!
Taglist: @lov3lymoon96, @xomakara, @sweetinsaniiity, @shadowkoo
Fic is under the cut.
For a long time, you thought about whether you wanted to actually host a gender reveal party or just tell everyone that you were having a little girl at your baby shower. In the end, though, you decided on the latter. After all, you never really liked gender reveal parties, and you didn’t want to stress yourself out by planning an additional event during your pregnancy.
When you shared your thoughts with Dongyoung, he wholeheartedly agreed, saying, “I never really understood why gender reveals are so popular, anyway. They just seem like a hassle for everyone involved.”
“I mean, I understand wanting to celebrate your baby, and finding out the sex is a huge milestone. I just think it’s more stress than it’s worth right now.”
“I understand, love. Speaking of celebrating our little girl, have you started planning the baby shower yet?”
“I haven’t, but Nayeon and Jisoo have. They’re so excited to have a niece,” you said with a laugh.
A soft smile formed on Dongyoung’s face as he responded, “I’m happy that you have friends like them in your corner. You deserve all the support you can get.”
“Thank you. I love you.”
“I love you too, baby.”
With a smile, you placed a gentle kiss on Dongyoung’s nose. When you pulled away, you noticed a faint blush on his cheeks, and your heart did backflips in your chest. All you could think about as you watched his reaction to the small gesture was how handsome you thought that he was and how much you loved him.
Your thoughts were interrupted, however, by your boyfriend’s voice saying, “Love? Are you ok?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you replied, shaking your head to snap yourself out of it. “What’s up, honey?”
“Are you sure it’s ok to bring Jaehyun here to meet you while he’s in town?”
Fuck.
You’d forgotten about the plans you’d made with Dongyoung’s best friend. Jaehyun was staying at a hotel near your apartment building for a few weeks so that he could meet you and catch up with Dongyoung before the baby arrived. If you were being completely honest with yourself, you were incredibly nervous to meet the man that Dongyoung had named his son after. Still, you smiled and said, “Of course, love. Just text me when you’re on your way from the hotel. I’ll do my best to look presentable.”
“You always look presentable, baby.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I do, but have I ever passed up an opportunity to compliment you?”
“No, I guess you haven’t.”
“Exactly. I’ll be back. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
With that, Dongyoung left your apartment to pick Jaehyun up from his hotel. You’d heard countless stories about Dongyoung’s best friend, and while you were excited, you couldn’t shake the anxiety that planted itself firmly in your stomach after your lover left your apartment.
To distract yourself from your nerves about meeting someone that was so important to the man that you loved, you decided to do a bit of cleaning around your apartment. Nothing too strenuous, since you didn’t want to overwhelm yourself, just a bit of organizing to occupy your mind. It worked better than you expected it to, and before you knew it, you felt much better.
When you heard your door opening and voices filling your living room, you knew that Dongyoung and Jaehyun had arrived. You rushed to put away the socks that you were organizing, then joined them, a bright smile plastered onto your face.
“Hi, my love,” Dongyoung said, “This is Jaehyun.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” you said, the fake smile you wore to conceal your nerves never once leaving your face.
“Likewise,” Jaehyun began. “I’ve heard so much about you.”
“All good things, I hope,” you said with a chuckle as you turned to Dongyoung.
“Of course they were all good things,” your lover responded with a smile. Unlike yours, however, his smile seemed genuine as he watched you and Jaehyun interact.
With a soft laugh, you turned back to Jaehyun and said, “What did he tell you?”
“I’m not sure you wanna know,” he responded.
The jokes cut through the awkwardness slightly, but you still felt nervous around Jaehyun. After seeing him smile, however, you realized that it was different from your typical anxiety whenever you met someone new. It was the same feeling of butterflies in your stomach that you felt the first time you laid eyes on Dongyoung when you saw him at the bar in your hometown on that fateful night.
You loved Dongyoung dearly, but you still had to admit that Jaehyun was incredibly attractive. It was kind of jarring, actually, how good he looked, considering that he presented himself the exact opposite of how Dongyoung did. Your lover always took care to put his best foot forward, with his hair always neatly combed and his dress shirt and slacks always pressed. Jaehyun, on the other hand, was dressed casually in baggy jeans with holes in the knees and a band tee, and his hair looked like he rolled out of bed shortly before Dongyoung picked him up. Regardless, they both looked incredible.
You were snapped out of your admiration by Dongyoung asking, “Are you ok, love?”
You shook your head in an attempt to rid the thoughts from your brain and replied, “I’m alright, honey. Just thinking about some things. It’s nothing important, though.”
“Are you sure?” Jaehyun asked, mirroring his best friend’s concern.
“I’m ok; I promise. Thank you for asking, though.”
Dongyoung and Jaehyun both smiled, and the three of you spent the rest of the day asking questions to get to know each other. You could tell that it was important to Dongyoung that you and Jaehyun got along, so you really tried to make a good impression. Jaehyun was clearly trying to do the same, but he didn’t really have to try. He had the kind of confidence that drew people in, and you couldn’t help but think that you really did like him.
As Jaehyun was getting ready to leave, you asked, “We’re planning a baby shower for some time in the next few weeks. Would you like to come?”
“That sounds great. Thank you,” he replied, pleasantly surprised by the invitation.
“I’ll have Dongyoung let you know when we have an exact date and time.”
“Why don’t I just give you my number so that you can tell me directly?” Jaehyun asked. You were surprised by the suggestion, but you still agreed. Once the two of you had exchanged phone numbers, Jaehyun smiled and said, “It was nice to meet you, by the way!”
“Thank you! It was nice to meet you, too,” you replied.
With that, Dongyoung left to take Jaehyun home, and you were left alone with your thoughts. Sure, you thought about games and party favor ideas for your baby shower, but you also thought about how you felt about your lover’s best friend. Did you really think that he was attractive, or did you just like that he was nice to you? Truthfully, you had no idea, so you decided to do your best to push the thoughts away.
As you worked with Nayeon and Jisoo to plan your baby shower, however, you found yourself getting distracted frequently. Your best friends definitely noticed that something was going on, but they decided not to push you to talk about it. After all, they were fairly sure that you would tell them when you were ready. And, if it wasn’t something you were comfortable talking about, they would still do their best to support you.
When the day of the baby shower finally came, you spent the entire morning feeling like a nervous wreck. Sure, you were excited to celebrate your baby, but you also couldn’t help but worry that something would go wrong. After all, your parents, Dongyoung’s parents, and Jaehyun would all be in your apartment for hours on end. There was no way that you were going to get through the party without any problems, and you knew it.
As guests actually started to arrive, you only felt worse. Regardless of how you felt, however, you put on a happy face for the sake of the people that you cared about. Once everyone arrived, you exclaimed, “Welcome! Dongyoung and I are so happy to have you all here to celebrate our baby.”
“Do you know if you’re having a boy or a girl yet?” your mom asked.
“Well, yes. Dongyoung and I found out at our last appointment. We were planning to announce it today, actually.”
“Why not just have a gender reveal party?” Mrs. Kim asked, every word laced with judgement.
You opened your mouth to answer, but before you could, Dongyoung interrupted by saying, “I didn’t think it was a good idea to plan two separate parties. (Y/N) has been so worried about the baby, I didn’t want her taking on any additional stress. A baby shower can be overwhelming enough to plan without a gender reveal party added on. Isn’t that right, love?”
“Yes, that’s right. Thank you, honey,” you replied, relieved that he’d stepped in to defend you.
Mrs. Kim seemed surprised that her son answered her question on your behalf, as evidenced by the way her eyes widened briefly before she went back to her typical expression of false indifference. It was petty, and you knew it, but you felt a sense of pride when you heard Dongyoung finally act like an adult when it came to not letting his parents treat you like dirt because they had a problem with every little thing you said and did.
Despite the awkwardness after Mrs. Kim’s question, the baby shower went surprisingly well. Everyone loved the games that you’d planned, there were more than enough snacks, and the gifts that everyone brought for your little girl brought tears to your eyes. Your mom made a blanket using the softest yarn you’d ever seen, your dad bought a photo album that was perfect for preserving precious memories, and Nayeon and Jisoo worked together to buy the highest-quality car seat that they could find. Even Jaehyun brought a gift, a small gray teddy bear for your baby to snuggle with once she was old enough. Every moment made you emotional as you thought about how loved your little girl already was before she even came into the world.
After the gifts were all opened, you smiled and said, “Dongyoung and I have one more announcement planned before the games begin.”
“What is it?” Jaehyun asked.
“Well,” you began, “Since we found out at my last doctor’s appointment that we’re having a daughter, we’ve been discussing names. After a lot of careful consideration, we’ve made a decision.”
“What name did you choose?” Nayeon asked.
With wide smiles on your faces, you and Dongyoung answered at the same time and said “Jiyeon.”
Everyone seemed confused about the name, but no one said anything until your mom asked, “How did you choose?”
Dongyoung stepped back to let you explain, “Well, I knew that I wanted to name the baby after someone that I care about, and Dongyoung suggested naming her after a close friend. Obviously, my closest friends are Nayeon and Jisoo. I didn’t want to choose between the two of them, though, so Dongyoung suggested combining their names.”
Your two best friends started to cry, and you pulled both of them into a hug. Once she felt like she could speak again, Jisoo said, “We love you, (Y/N).”
“I love you guys too, if that wasn’t obvious.” You laughed slightly after you spoke, and everyone smiled at the sweet scene that played out in front of them.
After the announcement, you moved on to games. They were relatively uneventful, with the exception of one particular moment with Jaehyun that you could only hope didn’t catch Dongyoung’s attention. The two of you were put onto a team for charades, and he looked at you and said, “Can’t wait to play with you,” with a smile and a wink.
You hated yourself for it, but you couldn’t help but feel giddy when Jaehyun winked at you. Sure, you loved Dongyoung, but you also really liked the attention that you were getting from his best friend. Still, you knew that it was wrong to think that way about Jaehyun, so you did your best to ignore the feeling.
Other than the small moment with Jaehyun, the rest of the baby shower was pretty uneventful. Games were played, snacks were eaten, and not a single moment went by without you feeling loved by the people that you cared most about. You got emotional as you thought about the fact that the love you felt in that moment was the same amount of love that Jiyeon would receive when she finally arrived.
After the baby shower was over and cleaned up, you and Dongyoung went right to your shared bedroom to rest together after the chaotic day you’d had. At least, that was what you thought was gonna happen. Dongyoung apparently had other plans, though. When you got to your bedroom, he immediately pulled you close and kissed you with what could only be described as pure desire. As you felt his lips on yours, you couldn’t help but feel a similar desire start to build.
When Dongyoung pulled away from the kiss, you were left speechless. As you tried to catch your breath, he begged, “Needed you all day. Please?”
In an instant, you regained your confidence, and with a teasing tone in your voice, you asked, “Please, what?”
“Wanna taste you.”
Your false dominance was toppled in an instant when you heard his words. Wanting nothing more than to feel his mouth on you, you asked, “Please?” with your voice barely above a whisper.
“Gladly, baby,” Dongyoung replied with a laugh, amused by your attempt at taking control. “Lie down for me, ok?”
You scrambled to do as you were told, and Dongyoung wasted no time finding a comfortable position between your legs once your clothes were off. He started by softly kissing your inner thighs, and you let out quiet moans at the sensation. Your hands found their way to his hair and pulled, and he groaned against you.
“Fuck! Need more, please,” you whined, desperate to finally feel him where you wanted him most.
“Your wish is my command, baby,” Dongyoung answered, finally starting to gently tease your clit with his tongue. You moaned loudly, bucking your hips up at the feeling. When he noticed what you were doing, Dongyoung groaned against you again, and you only got more turned on from there.
“Fuck, right there,” you whined when he moved his tongue a certain way.
“Here, baby?” he asked before repeating the gesture.
“Yes, holy fuck,” you moaned, pulling his hair as you lost yourself in pleasure.
Dongyoung continued to tease you with his tongue, and you knew that you weren’t going to last long. After all, it’d been far too long since the last time the two of you were intimate, considering how stressed and busy you’d both been. He hadn’t even been between your legs for very long, and you already felt like you were about to break.
If you were of a clearer mind, you would have been embarrassed by how little time it took for your orgasm to start to approach. You were not of a clear mind, however, so all you could think about was how good it would feel to come undone on Dongyoung’s tongue.
With a loud moan, you warned Dongyoung that you were close, and immediately after, you tumbled over the edge into euphoria with a loud moan of his name. He continued to pleasure you as you rode out your release, but when he felt you pushing his head away, he stopped. While you caught your breath, he stood up to find you a glass of water. You, however, had other ideas.
It didn’t take long for you to come down from your release, so you stood up and dropped to your knees in front of where Dongyoung stood before he even had the chance to leave the room. When you looked up at him with a mischievous smile on your face, he knew exactly what you wanted to do. Still, he decided to tease you by asking, “What do you want, angel? I need you to use your words.”
“Wanna return the favor. Please?”
“Of course, love. Can’t wait to feel your mouth around me.”
You made quick work of removing his pants and boxers, and before Dongyoung even had time to process what was happening, your mouth was around him. You moved slowly at first, which he appreciated, but once you started to hear soft moans leave his lips, you started to move your head just a little bit faster.
“Fuck, baby. Just like that. Your mouth feels so good around me,” he said with a loud moan. As he lost himself in the way you felt, his hands tangled themselves in your hair, and he started to thrust gently into your mouth. He tried to exercise some self-control, since he didn’t want to overwhelm you, but admittedly, he struggled quite a bit when it came to controlling himself around you.
Just like you did when your positions were reversed, Dongyoung knew that he wouldn’t last long. The way you moved your mouth up and down his shaft, moaning as you took as much of him as you could, brought him closer and closer to the edge. With anyone else, he would have been incredibly embarrassed by how little time it took him to feel his release start to build, but since you were the one bringing him to the edge, he didn’t care at all.
With one more well-timed swirl of your tongue, you felt Dongyoung release in your mouth and heard him moan your name. When you were sure you’d taken all of it, you swallowed his cum with a smile on your face, and he felt like he was going to come again just at the sight. He was far too tired for that, though. So, once he caught his breath, he carefully got into bed and reached his arms out, silently asking you to cuddle with him.
When you saw Dongyoung reaching for you, you smiled and carefully got into bed with him. Once you found a comfortable position, you were asleep almost immediately. Dongyoung, however, was awake long after you drifted off, thinking about some things that he’d noticed during the baby shower. He was sure it was nothing, but doubt still danced around the back of his mind like the world’s most insufferable ballerina. Regardless, he knew there was nothing he could do about it while you were asleep. So, he decided that he would ask you about it when the two of you woke up in the morning.
The next morning, Dongyoung woke you up by asking, “Hey, honey, can we talk?”
“Of course, love. What’s going on?”
“Is there something going on with you and Jaehyun?”
Fuck.
You had two options: you could tell Dongyoung the truth about your newfound attraction to his best friend, or you could completely deny everything in the hopes of pretending that everything was fine. After a brief moment of consideration, you decided on the latter.
“No, of course not. Why do you ask?”
“I noticed the way he was looking at you during the baby shower. Were you uncomfortable, honey? I can talk to him if you want.”
Oh, bless his heart. With a smile on your face to hide your nerves, you said, “I’m ok, honey. Honestly, I didn’t even notice it. I don’t want you to get into an argument with your friend because of me.”
“Alright,” Dongyoung replied, suspicion evident in his voice. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
After your conversation about Jaehyun, any time spent with Dongyoung was awkward, to say the least. Conversations were short and to the point, the two of you weren’t spending as much quality time together, and he didn’t even let you kiss him half the time. You wanted to say something, anything, to fix things, but you didn’t know what you could say. So, you continued to hope that your relationship would get better at some point.
Just like you’d hoped it wouldn’t, your relationship with Dongyoung only got worse. The moment that it really started to fall apart was the day that his parents decided to visit the two of you at your apartment. You knew that they were coming, since the visit was arranged in advance, but you still felt unprepared when you heard a knock on your door. Regardless, you plastered a fake smile on your face and answered it, and Mr. and Mrs. Kim stood before you.
“Hello!” you said, hoping that your fake excitement was convincing enough. “Please, come in.”
You moved out of the doorway, and Dongyoung’s parents entered your apartment, scrutinizing everything from the color of your walls to how expensive your furniture was. You saw the way that they looked at your bookshelf, like they were trying to decide if you were intelligent enough for their son based on the books you owned, but you decided not to comment on it. After all, it was important to the man you loved that you had a good relationship with his parents.
The tension in the room was palpable, and the awkward silence that settled in your living room only made it worse. Still, you were determined to finally make a good impression, so you smiled and said, “How are you two doing today?”
“We’re fine, thank you,” Mr. Kim replied.
“Can I get either of you something to drink?” you asked, desperate to keep them happy until Dongyoung came home from dropping Jaehyun off back at his hotel.
“No thank you, dear,” Mrs. Kim said, clearly unamused by your attempts to stave off the awkwardness that permeated the room. “We just want to know how you’re doing.”
“I’m fine, thank you. I’ve been much more tired than usual over the past few months, but I am so relieved that Jiyeon is developing the way she should be.”
Both of your boyfriend’s parents looked uncomfortable after you answered Mrs. Kim’s question, not expecting you to respond beyond saying that you were fine. An awkward silence hung in the air as they tried to hide their discomfort, and Mr. Kim was the first to break it by asking, “So, when will my son be here?”
“Dongyoung should be home any minute. He just left to give Jaehyun a ride back to his hotel.”
“Who’s Jaehyun?” Mrs. Kim asked.
“Oh, he’s Dongyoung’s best friend. He’s been visiting for the past few weeks since they haven’t seen each other since Dongyoung and Joy got married.”
The mention of Dongyoung’s ex-wife brought back the awkwardness that you’d tried so hard to get rid of, and you kicked yourself for mentioning his wedding. You desperately wanted to save the situation, since you knew that this visit could make or break Mr. and Mrs. Kim’s view of you, but you didn’t know how. Luckily for you, however, before either of his parents could say anything else, Dongyoung opened the door and said, “Hi, honey! I’m home!”
“Hi, my love,” you replied, moving from your spot to give Dongyoung a hug.
Mr. Kim cleared his throat when he thought that the two of you had been hugging for too long, and Dongyoung immediately let go. With an obviously fake smile on his face and shaky hands, he said, “Hi, mom. Hi, dad. How are you doing?”
“We’re fine, Dongyoung,” Mrs. Kim answered. “Spending more time with the mother of our second grandchild has been lovely.” As she said this, she turned to you with an obviously fake smile of her own.
The small talk continued for what felt like an eternity before Mr. Kim finally decided to say what was on his mind. With a sigh, he said, “Listen, son. We know you say that you love (Y/N), but are you sure that this is what you want?”
“What do you mean, dad?” Dongyoung asked in response. “A life with the woman I love is exactly what I want.”
“You don’t love this woman, Dongyoung,” Mrs. Kim chimed in. “You love the things she lets you do that Joy wouldn’t.”
“That’s not true,” your lover replied, though his voice was softer than when he’d spoken to his dad.
“Isn’t it?” Mrs. Kim pressed. “Your whole relationship started with an affair, right? So, there was something about (Y/N) that you liked that Joy didn’t have. She’ll only be bad for you in the long run, though. I mean, really, Dongyoung. Do you honestly think that you can get another job as a pastor when you’re running around town with a whore like her?
Dongyoung went silent at his mother’s question, not even stepping up to defend you after she called you a whore. So, you decided to defend yourself by saying, “I think you would do well to remember that it takes two to do the devil’s tango, ma’am. Your son is just as guilty as I am.”
Mr. and Mrs. Kim gasped, shocked that you actually had the audacity to talk back to them, another thing that Joy would never have done. After a brief silence, Mrs. Kim huffed and said, “We’re leaving. Goodbye, Dongyoung.”
Dongyoung’s parents left your apartment, and Dongyoung was once again completely silent. However, you were not going to let him get away with not speaking up for you, especially considering the progress he’d previously made when it came to standing up to his parents. So, you asked, “What the fuck was that?”
“I’m sorry! I panicked!”
“You didn’t panic at the baby shower. What was different then?” He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, you added, “Wait, I know what it was. It was the fact that people were watching, right? That’s all you ever cared about. It’s why you broke up with me, it’s why you married Joy, and it’s why you tried so fucking hard to convince everyone that everything is perfectly fucking fine. Well, guess what? It isn’t.”
“I know,” he replied, sounding defeated. “Can we please talk about this another time?”
“There’s nothing else to talk about, Dongyoung. There’s definitely a lot for me to think about, though.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
You ignored his question and spat, “I’m going out.”
“Where the fuck are you going?”
“None of your goddamn business!” you yelled as you grabbed your purse and left.
Once you were out the door and certain that Dongyoung couldn’t hear you, you called Jaehyun and asked, “Are you busy?”
“I’m never too busy for you. What’s going on?”
“Can you meet me at the park by your hotel? Dongyoung and I got in an argument, and I need to clear my head.”
Jaehyun was surprised that you went to him of all people for support after an argument with Dongyoung, but he couldn’t really say that he was upset. He liked you a lot, so he was happy to be a shoulder for you to cry on when you needed someone. Hoping he didn’t sound too excited, he replied, “I can be there in twenty minutes. Is that ok?”
“Yeah, of course,” you responded before hanging up and leaving for the park.
It didn’t take long after you arrived at the park for Jaehyun to show up. When he got there, he pulled you into a hug, and you cried into his shoulder while he rubbed your back. Once he was certain that you were done crying, he asked, “Do you wanna talk about it?”
“His mom called me a whore, and he didn’t say a word.”
“What?”
“His parents visited today after you went back to your hotel. Near the end of the visit, his mom called me a whore. He said nothing. Couldn’t even look at me.”
“I am so sorry, (Y/N).”
“I just don’t understand why he’s so afraid of them. He’s almost 30 years old, for fuck’s sake. He should be able to say, ‘Hey, mom, don’t call my daughter’s mother a whore.’”
“He can’t?”
“No, he won’t. He’s always been that way, though. The whole reason he broke up with me when we were in college was an ultimatum that his parents gave him. If he didn’t break up with me, they were gonna stop helping him pay tuition.”
“He never told me that.”
“I mean, why would he? It would paint him in a bad light, and he can’t fucking handle that. It’s always been about his image for him. Back then, he had to be a model student. After college, he had to be a model husband, a model father, and a model pastor. Now, he can’t have that picture-perfect image that he wants, and I think that’s a problem for him.”
“I am so sorry, (Y/N). You don’t deserve that.”
“I don’t know about that, but thanks.”
“No, seriously. You don’t deserve to be treated like you don’t matter just because he has an image that he wants to maintain.”
With a soft smile on your face, you said, “Thanks, Jae. That means a lot to me.”
A subtle blush appeared on Jaehyun’s face, and all you could think about was how badly you wanted him. Without really stopping to consider whether it was a good idea, you kissed him.
A small noise of surprise left Jaehyun’s mouth when he felt your lips on his, but he also didn’t push you away. It was wrong for you to do this, and both of you knew it, but neither of you could find it in yourselves to stop it. For you, this moment was an escape from your shitty relationship with Dongyoung and a way to finally feel wanted again. For Jaehyun, it was a chance to show you that he could love you better than Dongyoung ever had.
When you pulled away for air, you looked into Jaehyun’s eyes, and you realized that you desperately wanted to be with him instead of Dongyoung. The realization scared you, so you abruptly said, “I have to go. I’m sorry,” and went back to your car. Jaehyun seemed puzzled by your sudden departure, but he said nothing.
When you got back to your apartment, you texted Jaehyun again, hoping to clear the air between the two of you.
Y/N: I’m sorry about earlier. I don’t know what happened. Jaehyun: Did I do something wrong? Y/N: No, I did when I kissed you. I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. Jaehyun: But what if I want it to?
You didn’t respond after that, instead choosing to turn your phone off for the night. Then, you went to bed, crying yourself to sleep as you thought about the mess that you’d gotten yourself into.
Weeks went by, and your relationship with Dongyoung was strained at best. He continued to help you prepare for Jiyeon’s arrival, but the two of you didn’t talk much outside of that. Initially, you tried to have conversations with him in an attempt to bridge the gap between the two of you. Each time, however, you were met with either brief answers or none at all, so you decided to just give up.
Dongyoung finally decided to put a bit of effort in, however, when the final court hearing was over and the order of dissolution was signed, officially ending his marriage to Joy. When he came home from the courthouse, his copy of the paperwork in hand, the first thing that he did was pull you into a hug and kiss you like he was seeing you for the first time in years. You melted into the kiss, enjoying the feeling of his lips on yours, but you didn’t let the feeling distract you from the fact that you were still angry with him.
When Dongyoung pulled away from the kiss, he said, “The divorce was finalized today.”
“Is ‘congratulations’ an appropriate thing to say in this situation?”
“I think so, since this means I can ask you something that I’ve wanted to ask you since we were in high school.”
“Dongyoung what the fuck-”
You were interrupted by Dongyoung getting down on one knee and asking, “Will you marry me?”
To say that you were shocked by the proposal was a massive understatement. Marriage was something that you hadn’t discussed with Dongyoung at all since getting back together, and you honestly didn’t understand how he could possibly think that this was a good time to do it. Between your stress about your pregnancy, your recent fights, and your newfound feelings for Jaehyun, you knew what your answer had to be from the moment he asked the question.
“No, Dongyoung. At least, not yet.”
Dongyoung’s face fell at your answer, and he asked, “Why not? It’s the perfect time, isn’t it?”
“Are you fucking serious? You literally could not have chosen a worse time. I’m going to be giving birth soon! Or did you forget that?”
“Then we can schedule the wedding for after Jiyeon is born,” he responded, desperate to make it work.
“Dongyoung, Jiyeon isn’t the only reason I said no.”
“Then why did you say no?”
“Because we have a lot to talk about before I would even consider marriage. What happens if we have an argument, and you stop talking to me again? What happens if your parents don’t like how we choose to raise Jiyeon, and you can’t stand up to them? What then, Dongyoung? Am I supposed to just sit there and take it? Make our daughter just sit there and take it?”
Dongyoung wanted to say something, anything, to make the situation better, but he had no idea where to start. If he was being completely honest with himself, you were completely right. He was horrible at handling stress, and he knew that he had to get better at standing up to his parents. He really didn’t know how to do that, though. So, he decided to just stay quiet, hoping to avoid escalating your heated conversation into a full-blown argument. The silence only made you angrier, however. You saw his silence as giving up, not even caring about the situation enough to respond to you.
When you and Dongyoung first got back together, you genuinely wanted to believe that your relationship was worth saving. The more you thought about it, however, the worse you felt about staying with him. Still, you decided that you would give him one more chance to say something, anything to prove that he cared. With a defeated sigh, you looked at Dongyoung and asked, “Do you seriously have nothing to say to that?”
“What do you want me to say?”
“Anything to indicate to me that you give a fuck!”
“Do you honestly believe that I don’t?”
You hesitated for a moment before you answered, “I do think that you care about me, at least a little bit, but I don’t think that you care enough about me to put in the effort to actually make our relationship better. I think that you just want to ignore the problems we’ve been having so that you can pretend you finally have the perfect little family that you wanted when we were in high school.”
“That’s not true.”
“Well, I’m tired of waiting for you to prove it to me, Dongyoung. I’m done.”
“Wait, (Y/N), can we-”
“No. I’m done trying to fix things between us. Trying to do this again was a mistake. You have a week to find somewhere else to live. I do not want you in my apartment anymore.”
“I’ll talk to my parents. They offered to let me stay with them after they found out about the divorce, anyway.”
Dongyoung left the room to call his parents, and you finally allowed yourself to cry for the first time in far too long. Deep down, you knew that trying to rekindle your relationship with Dongyoung would only end in heartbreak. Still, you desperately wanted to let yourself have hope that the two of you could be ok. As time went on, however, you realized that your relationship was hopeless.
After Dongyoung packed his things and left with his parents, you called Jaehyun. With a deep breath, you asked, “Can you come over?”
“Of course, what’s going on?”
“We’re done,” you said, hoping that he couldn’t tell that you’d been crying.
“Oh, I’m so sorry, honey. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“Thank you,” you replied before hanging up the phone and continuing to sob.
When Jaehyun finally got to your apartment, the first thing that he did was pull you into a hug, rubbing your back as you sobbed into his shoulder, just like you did the night that you kissed him. When you finally felt like you could speak again, you looked up at him and said, “I just couldn’t do it anymore.”
“Hey, I understand. Do you wanna talk about it?”
You shook your head and answered, “Can you just hold me, please?”
“Of course.”
For the first time that day, you smiled as you said, “Thank you.”
The room was silent after that, but it was a comfortable silence, like a warm blanket protecting you and Jaehyun from further strife. Jaehyun was the first to break the silence when he laughed softly and asked, “Can we sit on the couch? My feet hurt a little bit.”
“Yeah, of course.”
You took Jaehyun’s hand and led him to your couch, and once you found a comfortable position, he pulled you close, wrapping his arms around you as if he was trying to protect you from the pain that Dongyoung had caused. In a way, he was successful. You felt like nothing could hurt you as long as he held you close, which you greatly appreciated, given the stress of the day.
While you and Jaehyun sat together on your couch, you talked about whatever trivial things came to mind, like music that made you happy and the things that you were doing before everything went to shit. It didn’t take long for you to get too tired to continue carrying a conversation, though. When that happened, you looked up at Jaehyun and asked, “Can we go to bed? I’m really tired.”
“Of course, honey,” he said, laughing softly.
With that, you led Jaehyun to your room and found a comfortable position on your bed. Once you were settled, he wrapped his arms around you and sighed, delighted to hold you close for the night. As you drifted off to sleep, you found that you weren’t worrying about what was going to happen next. Instead, all you thought about was how safe and loved you felt in Jaehyun’s arms.
Thank you for reading! I cannot wait for y'all to finally read the end of this series. If you liked this, please like and reblog! If you want to read the rest of this series, check out the masterlist! If you wanna be tagged when the last part is posted, fill out the form here! If you want to check out my other works, check out my main masterlist. If you want to see what else is in the works, you can check my upcoming works list! If none of that interests you, or there's something specific you want to see, feel free to send a request via my asks or dms!
Thank you again for reading, have a wonderful day!
#kvanity#dovenet#keopihausnet#kpop fanfic#kpop imagines#kpop smut#kpop fluff#kpop angst#nct x reader#nct fanfic#nct imagines#nct fic#nct angst#nct smut#nct fluff#nct 127 fanfic#nct 127 x reader#nct 127 angst#nct 127 fluff#nct 127 smut#doyoung x reader#doyoung fanfic#doyoung angst#doyoung fluff#doyoung smut
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His uneasy agreement to try and get ahold of Montague is enough to sate her as she drops the topic entirely, more entranced by the idea of him that she keeps building up in her head.
An older male model with a pension for silvers and diamonds, a smooth juxtaposition to Valeria's fiery reds and golds, maybe they're business partners! Regularly hired and scheduled together for that opposites look. Though she doubts she still models in her 30s, unless she really did cave and get those surgeries her agent suggested one time...
Involuntarily Price shudders at the idea of anyone touching her with a scalpel and she shakes off the thought entirely just in time for Midas to answer in the positive about her gift-giving question.
His answer and further clarification almost causes her to drop a sleek black phone in surprise, a laugh bubbling out as she struggles to contain her disbelief.
"A condo?! Why, whatever made you buy such a thing!" She giggles out the question, clearly enjoying this entire experience and less than disoriented externally about the time jump.
She glances up from her phone picking to Midas with a look, something a bit smug and a bit of something else entirely as she catches his expression when she mentioned the stalker. "I've had plenty of freaks bother me, I'm used to it by now. I wouldn't be surprised if I still had any all the way here too but like, who knows."
Price does give a soft frown as she learns he's less than thrilled to speak about himself and she can't help the way her eyebrows furrow in an upset understanding. Normally she'd try and yank that information from people, tearing and prodding at their weak points until they told them everything she wanted to know. But Midas was clearly different, clearly he saw something in her worth the patience it took to deal with her and she decided she didn't want to press that specific subject.
She steps up close to him when he stands. "I hadn't meant to ask about the past I know from legend but I won't ask anything more even if I'm terribly curious about what led you to get such nice tattoos," Price practically coos out the compliment as she smooths out a hand by his collarbone, fingers toying with the collar of his shirt to get a better look at the large tattoo on his neck.
"I've always wanted one you know, did I ever end up getting it?" Her hand drags down just a bit before she removes it entirely to take a proper hold of his arm, smiling like the cat who caught the canary while looking up at him through her eyelashes.
"Oh, yes! Ugh like, I hope I have really cute shorts or something. Is this island chilly? I'm still not great at regulating my body temperature thanks to this little trinket, you know?" She flicks the relic with her free hand.
At the door to where the cursed Valeria had been brought, Midas gave one last nod to Brutus before taking a quick breath. He knocked twice before opening the door and stepping inside.
The sight of them was...stressful. Valeria was indeed around 20. The differences in her appearance almost as jarring as he'd imagined the Prince had been to everyone, with a smaller frame, her hair black, red underneath not quite her natural color, and much darker makeup than Midas saw Valeria wear these days. Skye's skinny jeans on them would be humorous under different circumstances.
He put a polite smile of his face despite the worry nagging at his core, not knowing exactly what to expect from the younger version of the person he'd come to adore.
"Hello, Miss Price. I apologize for the confusion you must be feeling." He said with a short bow, hands behind his back, "I am Midas, it's a pleasure to meet you."
He left out his royal title on purpose, thinking it might bring about a line of questions. Though, it might be a moot point with the crown sitting in his hair. And his armor. And the gold gauntlet. And the gold on his damn hand that he regretted not keeping behind his back now.
"This is my yacht, we call her The Marigold. The man who showed you to this room, Brutus? He brought me to speak with you. Said you were...expecting a photoshoot?"
@king-midas-fortnite
Between the time of being left in the room and Midas arriving Valeria had found herself entertained enough trying to guess the passcode of the phone she'd found in her pocket. It was nice, with a heavy black case and some odd symbol on the back that she almost recognized.
The man on the lockscreen, however, was a complete stranger to her. He looked nice despite the scars over one of his eyes which she decided he pulled off well.
Idly she wondered if he was some model she didn't know yet.
Leaning back into the couch and kicking her feet to stave off her boredom she continued to make up an entire life for a man she only had a singular image of. Valeria decided he was a model, an older one of course but that's not uncommon for male models, and he probably did a lot with high class attire. Anything but shades unless it was a summer shoot and they were sitting on his hairline rather than his actual face.
She shifts again to sit back up, nail tapping on the screen to keep it from going dark, just in time for Midas to knock and enter.
"Oh thank gods, like, where the HELL am I?" Yet, she doesn't even bother to actually look at him while he talks.
At least until he says his name and she perks up instantly. Valeria's head whips to look at him, flaming embers flying off of her hair and fortunately cooling before scattering across the couch.
He continues to talk and all she can do is stare owlishly at him as she takes in every feature from his face to the crown and his hand.
His hand.
"No way," Her words came out more like a gasp of awe as she slowly stood up, eyes sparkling with curiosity and literal sparks as the relic around her neck clinks against the gold bands. "Brutus? Is that really-" A laugh bubbles out of her mouth and she sheepishly tries to cover her mouth. "No, no I'm sorry, um, oh wow."
Valeria takes a moment to try and compose herself but it's clear she has a very specific question in mind.
"Like, I had assumed it was a shoot but now I have no clue what's going on but like, you're," She clenches and unclenches her fists as if trying to contain herself. More flames flutter from her hair as she talks.
"I can tell, oh my gods, you're The Midas aren't you? Not, not a model dressed up for some tattoo shoot right?"
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Senior photo time with newly painted shoes! As before, done with Jacquard Lumiere metallic acrylic paint in the 552 Bright Gold color
(Image ID in Alt text - pleas let me know if I should put it in the main text here or not!)
#art#artists on tumblr#gold paint#leather#shoes#For the same friend as before#After wearing the first pair he told me the best compliment he's ever recieved is that the shoes had more character than he did#Really happy with how these turned out!#need to get painting again#maybe if I paint more I'll feel less overwhelmed x.x
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That post about huge red flags from exes is going around and I’m like well mine requires some background reading
#xrdslog#um basically. made a bet they could convince me to kiss them and constantly hinted at it until it happened and then bragged about it a lot#then I told them I was aro#then we got a headmate that they had a crush on and started dating#and then used that to argue that I should date them bc it’s easier if it’s both of us#and then prioritized me over him#also: this headmate is one I have a father and son relationship with#so what the hell#also told me they fixated on people and they still loved me but they were fixated on their friend so couldn’t give me attention#their friend who they called their not-girlfriend. because that friend’s husband wasn’t comfortable with her being poly#and they still wanted to date her so they just called her that instead#gifted me an expensive adult toy and then took it and gave it to said not girlfriend#which. ok sure. but then why tell me it was a gift#demanded to talk to certain headmates and made a big fuss about knowing exactly who did what even though they were rarely correct#pushed me away whenever they were sad and then was upset I wasn’t comforting them#I baked banana bread once on a whim and then they constantly made me make it for them when I didn’t want to#NEEDED music playing at night and fans on them and they got upset if I didn’t want to sleep by them even though I couldn’t#‘pretended’ to choke me when I got a rare item in final fantasy before them#wanted to rp with me but demanded I start it because they were tired of starting rps with their friend. ok. not my fault ?#more than once tried to get me to sign a lease with them even though I had no money or job#got mad at me because my art was good? and they didn’t think theirs was or that they were creative?#did not ever compliment me without an insult attached for the last three years of our relationship#constantly tried to talk about sex or illegal things in front of my mom#constantly bragged about how they were going to become rich when their grandma died and hoped it happened soon#The Entire Trauma Part where they barely comforted me at all#oh also I spent basically sixteen hours a day in VC with them every day and they broke up with me for not spending enough time with them#even though I could not Possibly have spent More time with them#there is more than this. but this is off the top of my head. lol.
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Mirror, mirror, on the wall...
Who's the fairest of them all?
#lowkey cringy caption but I thought it was fitting given the context#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#original character#who I still haven't figured out a tag system for lmao#Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness#alternative title: what a difference half a lifetime can make#summiya at 18/19 vs summiya at 34/35 is like night and day. she barely even looks like herself anymore#or maybe.. she looks more like herself than she ever did? what came before wasn't her. it was an empty porcelain doll devoid of personality#hiding the rotten nature underneath that's been steadily seeping through#and now that she has been thoroughly destroyed her outward appearance finally reflects what she was like inside all along#but just as she manages to convince herself of it. she looks in the mirror and refuses to accept that this is who she really is#where did that gorgeous girl who was so excited for her wedding day go? or the one who lit up upon being showered with compliments?#what happened to them? to her? how did she sink so low?#she was supposed to be better than this... better than her siblings. she was always better than Zaheer and Aiza#but now she's easily the worst of the free. their betrayal doesn't even compare#she deserves death for what she did. she looks at the bruising on her throat and wonders why it wasn't enough#why he didn't press just a little harder. then at least she wouldn't have to live with the shame#how awful of her to wish for that. she is getting what was coming to her. she did all of that for the shame. it is her punishment#she doesn't get the mercy of dying and escaping the consequences of her actions#she is by no means innocent. what's happening now is simply justice being enacted. she's sure of it#she's alone and ruined and miserable. having driven away everyone who could have possibly cared for her. not that anyone did#perhaps it's better that way. maybe then no one else will look at her and realise just how different she looks from her younger self#she wasn't happy back then either but she was content. she was taking the first step towarcs the perfect life she was promised#now that very save perfect life is crashing and burning all around her. perhaps it was inevitable. it was always going to end this way#(sleepy tags so I apologise if they make no sense whatsoever or are just rehashes of stuff I've said before. I'm tired. gonna go to bed now)#oh. before I forget though:#injury tw#bruises tw
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i need to learn to compliment people becauze i am always thinking it and its not even like im afraid theyre gonna think im stupid or weird its just like my brain short circuits about it until they have already passed me and i have lost the opportunity to compliment a stranger
#txt#gekkering#ever since dressing more like idk alt i guess emo goth whatever you want to call it#i get more compliments on like outfits and stuff than i ever did before so like i know its fun to be complimented and i have never felt#weird about a compliment so thats not a fear anymore#now i just dont know what it is LOL#i went to an antique store yesterday ans the cashier i believe was trans and also like incredibly goth i wanted to compliment them esp becau#se they complimented my necklace but i was just like o__o#alas
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"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(
#repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns#im not unsafe btw just. :^) scared :^)#tired.#starting to stop walking on eggshells kind of. in a cowardly way. like responding some of my real thoughts but at 4am#i want to scream. im not like that but i want to yell and tell her to leave me alone forever and i just want to be able to rest !#and to not be afraid. i want to move. i want to drop off the face of the earth. i want to go to bed. i want to stay awake and on guard.#idk. im tired. im so tired and i want it to stop. it's not even a big deal.#the thinly veiled insults bother me more than anything else. insult sandwich on compliment bread.#im so pretty im so stupid im so funny. im smart im too insecure im beautiful. im the most interesting person she knows im evil im talented#it's not even the worst thing it just pisses me off so much. do you think this is helpful to say? do you think this is normal?#do you think you'll get what you want insulting and belittling me as long as you tell me you think im attractive?#it's always how pretty i am. like some superficial bullshit is going to make up for an insult or make the insult disappear#and everyone else gets to leave but if i leave she'll die and it'll be all my fault and this is just like x y or z#and didnt i know she almost experienced trauma as a child but didnt? and how that effects her?#fuck. i hope she sees this tbh. how fucking insulting to see something someone's experienced and say that couldve maybe happened to me#but the person who couldve done it lives in another country and never came here.#what the fuck. what the fuck.#so it didnt happen to you? you cant lay claim to it at all? yet you think you understand me or that even if it did happen it's all the same#im going to lose my mind. im so. fucking. over it. but im a coward and i dont want her to die so ill grin and bear it.#and she'll tear out all my skin and ask if it's a little too much and ill say it's fine and she'll say im so gorgeous but i'm disgusting#but at least im kind. and ill say okay. because if i say anything else it's a threat on her fucking life.#tbh im only posting this now bc i know no one will likely read it. perpetual coward when it comes to this shit#because if i tell someone the full extent they'll ask why i didn't leave sooner. but i did!#i left and i got bombarded and overwhelmed and i was so tired of being scared of running into her everywhere#and i just. eased back in. and said it would be less this time. and it is so much more. it is so much worse.#ive lived in that fear before and i was so tired of it. it was a big reason i moved so far for college. and i cant just run away#so this seemed better. but it's so much worse. id rather hide every day of my life. keep an eye out everywhere and run away.#it wasnt so bad really. it was tedious and nauseating and i only ever explained it to one person. but it wasnt impossible.#this is much closer to impossible. this is soul crushing every day. and the things she does arent even as bad i dont think#it just doesnt stop. at least in high school i eventually got it to stop. i just had to be avoidant. this. wont stop.
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