#i get mail

[mostlysignssomeportents]

I get mail

I, a total stranger, was thinking of befriending your kid, but before I did, I thought I'd ask you, are they a boring, selfish jerk?

It's fine if they are, I'm just really trying to find quality people to be friends with, so I thought I'd ask you, is your kid a dick?

Wait, don't get offended! How are people supposed to know whether to hang out with your kid if you can't answer a simple question?!

I, a total stranger, was thinking of inviting myself over to your house for dinner.

But before I do, I wanted to ask, is your cooking insipid, greasy and terrible?

Honestly, it's not problem if it is, I'm just trying to focus on eating food that isn't shit.

Oh, come on, don't be so touchy! How is anyone supposed to know whether to eat the food you cook if you won't tell them whether it sucks?

[lilithsaintcrow]

The Work For Today

Little things keeping me going right now, an incomplete list: Boxnoggin. Blissfully uncaring of my (so-called) larger concerns, he is focused entirely on brekkie, walkies, playtime, naps, more naps, loo breaks, snacks, more snacks, treats, yet more treats, more naps, dinner, and bedtime. He is thrilled that I am more likely than usual to walk away from the computer, lie down on the floor, and…

[lilithsaintcrow]

Reminds me of the several pages letter I once got (I guess the person had read Working For the Devil) that heavily implied I was the Whore of Babylon. The best part was the Beast of Revelation, hand-drawn, that looked like a brontosaurus with dyspepsia.

I was charmed, and glad that my public address is a PO box.

Thinking about the werewolf from the hate mail Lemgo council pharmacist David Welman (1595 - 1669) got after being accused of being a werewolf

[karnalesbian]

it should officially be recognized as a hate crime that i have to maintain a straight face when my fellow tax accountant coworkers discuss matters related to the Federal Unemployment Tax Act, which is almost always abbreviated for ease of reference. literally a harder task than everything the US marines have ever done i tell you

[vaugely10]

pet crew from a lil space au im fiddling with

+ extra under cut :]

MAIL SPACE SHIP! i used the post office van pearl built and just space-ificated it as much as i could :D

[wuntrum]

february's postcard 💌

[homo-ousios]

The three-ring binder is the apex of book technology, by the way. All the advantages of a codex, plus you can add, remove, and reorder pages at will - pages which you can furthermore protect from damage in transparent sleeves, and store commentaries, notes, and other paratextual addenda behind them without obscuring the primary content. Truly the queen of codices. Reblog if you love the three-ring binder.

[chipper-smol]

vibes for tonight 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

[runawaymarbles]

guess who just got exposed to WHOOPING COUGH!!!!!!! *jazz hands*

[phantomrose96]

Making this a random PSA since I’d never heard about this until I encountered it:

When you close on a house, you will receive scare-mail from scammers that use a lot of alarming language and look like they’re from your bank. These are scams.

Mortgage information is public information. So these scammers will have access to your name, your address, and the name of the bank your mortgage is with.

They love to send vague letters that explain nothing but make it SOUND like you’re in trouble if you don’t call them

And if you they can’t win you over with scare tactics, they’ve attached a not-a-check to maybe make you think they’ll give you money.

I blurred out my personal info but actually I WILL include the phone number, in the hopes that people who receive a letter like this and Google the number might see this info. Scam number is 1 800 916 8689

So if you see this kind of letter, or your parents, or grandparents, or loved ones, it’s a scam.

I told Patches she can eat it

[lilithsaintcrow]

If and Might

I have got to go for a run soon or I might lose my mind. Hopefully when the weather turns later this week there will be an opportunity. Anyway. Of late I am receiving quite a few, “why don’t you do X, Y, Z fun thing anymore?”–things like Tales from the Backyard, or various other free stuff. And I might as well answer directly. A lot of it is because those things take time and energy, and all…

[hinamie]

august

[meo-eiru]

I CAN USE MY LAPTOP AGAIN

This is my response to the student relations who refused to answer my mails and calls through friday to monday only to just reply with "Go to the IT" and to the IT team who were nowhere to be found during work hours and caused me to waste half my day in campus:

[seafoamsol]

8/4 is Perceptor Day!

Be careful not to shake the cage; the denizens will get very scared.

[wyervan]

👁️ 👁️ hey. I love your creepy moon

hey. i think he likes you too.

[vaugely10]

bad boys + lizzie!

lizzie runs a bakery, and the boys scare off any potential threats to the business...for some reason they cant get rid of the traders that popped up across the street.. (the clockers are not afraid of them, they are also not afraid of the clockers, however they are all scared of cleo)