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theyassificationofbrunomadrigal · 3 years ago

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general madrigal family neurodiversity/lgbt headcanons based on observation

disclaimer: im not throwing labels around all over the place. the majority of these characters in my eyes are pretty much straight and neurotypical, because a lot of the reasons people headcanon them with other things are for reasons that have more of a reflection and people are instead misinterpreting it for something else. im taking note of everything that makes me think “is this a mental illness/gay/gender thing or is this a cultural thing?”

- abuela obviously has ptsd. she was forced out of her home and watched her husband die in front of her while holding three infants that she had to raise alone. other than that i dont see anything else. i believe that she is straight and there is no way for her to be anything other than cis.

- pepa is a little neurodivergent, but im not sure in which way. her emotions are /extremely/ erratic, especially for a person who focuses a lot of her energy on leveling it. she is cis, as proven in the flashbacks to the triplets receiving their doors. i headcanon her as straight but i wont argue with people who claim she is bi.

- bruno is the most obviously mentally ill character. even before the wall decade, his description reflects a lot of traits that carried over to his time in the walls. so its safe to assume not much changed about hi,, he just got a lot more depressed. that being said,the most obvious one is definitely ocd. while his rituals are definitely a reflection of his culture, the amount in which he does them and the rhythmic and repeated way that he acts them out doesnt seem very normal. they seem like compulsive rituals that have gone from a way to ward off bad luck to something he needs to do to prevent the crippling anxiety of something enormously bad happening. he also very much shows quite a bit of symptoms for anxiety and depression, especially in the ways he copes with his situation. lastly, he is most definitely on the spectrum. he has a bit of a hard time with people skills, coming off as creepy or weird or a bad luck charm. in reality he just doesn’t really understand social skills and is very literal with his actions and words. he has a hard time putting himself in others shoes, he sees the world through his eyes only even though he does understand why people see him the way they see him. he just doesnt know how to confront it. also the way his sentences are strung together???? this man is AUTISTIC. i headcanon him as either a gay man or ace aro. i won’t argue with people who see him as bi or straight but i have to say. i cannot even fathom that man being attracted to a woman. i dont know what it is about him but like i cant see him being attracted to anything other than another man, if he can even feel that type of attraction at all. again could totally see him as just. none of it. no attraction thanks. he is cis, as proven with flashbacks to when he received his door.

- julieta is neurotypical, cis, and straight from my observations. and no this does not make her less lovable tumblr just has a habit of being biased to neurodivergent and lgbt characters. we love u for who u are mama julieta.

- félix and agustín cis, they literally have biological children, and i didnt get enough information on them to deduce much for their neurodiversity. i don’t really have a sexuality headcanon for either of them, i just know they love their wives more than life itself. what good lads. we love félix and agustín madrigal.

- isabela is neurotypical, cis, and straight. maybe bi. she is not a lesbian because the reasoning for that that everyone is giving is that she didnt wanna marry mariano. SHE DIDNT WANNA MARRY HIM BECAUSE IT WAS AN ARRANGED FUCKING MARRIAGE NOT BECAUSE SHE WAS GAY. headcanon whatever you want but PLEASE dont erase that part of her character as it is a very important part of her culture.

- luisa is not trans. luisa is not trans. LUISA IS NOT TRANS. all these latina women and you headcanon the one that looks the least feminine as trans. come on. you dont need an expert to see the kind of cultural erasure that is ensuing. i dont have a sexuality headcanon for her either i dont care. she is possibly autistic. you can see it in her communication skills ESPECIALLY and her emotional fluctuations. however it could just be a sign of sensitivity.

-mirabel is cis. i dunno man i just dont think shes anything else. she probably has adhd, seen especially in the certain breed of “thinking out loud” that she has. i don’t really have a sexuality headcanon for her either. i do like the idea of her being bi!

- dolores is cis and straight. however i think her gift causes some mental issues for her. i dont know WHAT she has but her brain is a little funky due to the amount of overstimulation she has experienced for the past 17 years. she moves in a very robotic way almost. she’s got somethin.

- camilo is neurotypical but definitely has gender issues. hes the only one i headcanon with gender issues. and its not just because his character design is a 15 year old pretty boy that looks like hes wearing makeup. his gift has probably given him the biggest identity crisis of not knowing who he is. hes been constantly told to be other people to be useful that he probably doesnt think the real camilo has much significance, so this creates a lot of identity issues. he is definitely bi. look at him.

- antonio is five years old. (i do not see anything neurodivergent about him though)

anyways! heres my fun little thoughts do with this as you please

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inglourious-imagines · 5 years ago

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The Story of Their Lives (Lt. Aldo Raine)

Requested by: @tealaquinn

Summary: The story of Lt. Aldo Raine and Sgt. Y/N Y/L/N.

Prompts: 9 - Don't you touch her. & 12 - No one would hurt you again, or I'd kill them. & 21 - I wanna see how you lose control. & 24 - He's a badass with a good heart. & 39 - Kiss me. & 93 - You make me feel... you make me feel.

Author's Note: This is damn long so I really hope you like it! Also there are some parts in Italian so I'd like you to know, I've never learnt this language so there might be some mistakes. Feel free to send request or let me know if you wanna be tagged in these ♡

Taglist: @alienoresimagines @radiantcade @meteora-fc @kyra3155 @real-fans @not-john-watsons-blog @im-in-love-with-queen

Y/N and Aldo never showed some kind of an affection towards each other. They respected, trusted, appreciated the other one but these traits were common among the Basterds.

It seemed so innocent at first, almost like a teasing and none of the Jewish American soldiers expected to become it something more.

•••

They met at the very beginning of the Basterd's missions. Y/N was a french spy, a very famous one so she obviously got their attention since they'd gotten to France.

The Basterds recruited her in a bar and she immediately became one of them. Y/N fit within the group perfectly, like she was always destined to be a Basterd.

•••

After the third successful mission, they decided to stay the night in a local resistance hotel to relax and prepare for another action. Everyone went to their beds as soon as they could but Donny persuaded Y/N and Aldo to gamble a little before the sleep.

"C'mon, just one game!" Donny pleaded. It didn't take much and the trio was sitting around a table playing their fifth game.

"I thought you're better at poker, Lieutenant." Y/N laughed as she grabbed another money she won.

"Shut up, Sergeant. I just am a bit lenient with ya, that's all." Aldo fought back, trying to cover the fact he's worse with cards than Hugo trying to actually smile for once.

"Show me what you got, Lieutenant. I wanna see how you lose control." she winked at him and dealt the cards.

•••

Something changed in Aldo this evening. At first, Y/N was just another soldier sticking up for her country trying to end the war. But now he saw her in a totally different light.

He noticed what colour her eyes have, how she always ties her hair in a braid.

He noticed how her cheeks blushed when he praises her after a good work.

He noticed how she scrunches her nose when she disagrees with someone.

All those little things were filling his head. Aldo was so full of it. It was during the other mission when he completely understood his feelings.

•••

One moment and his whole world flipped.

Aldo was so angry with himself that he missed such an important thing.

Like a gun.

The German soldier was just kneeling in front of Aldo when he reached in his pocket. It all happened so quickly then.

The German pulled out a gun and with one last defiance he pulled the trigger. But it wasn't Aldo who got hit.

It was the woman behind him.

Aldo was like deprived of his senses. He threw away the piece of bread he was eating and jumped at the German. If Wicki didn't pulled him back, Aldo would probably beat the guy to death.

And that was Donny's speciality.

"Don't you fuckin' touch her! Or look at her!" Aldo shouted hitting his face with his fist one more time.

Y/N was so taken away by his behaviour, not really sure where the anger got from.

"What the hell, Lieutenant?" she frowned, "it's just a goddamn scratch on my arm. The bullet didn't even hit me properly."

Aldo froze whereas Donny and Hugo looked at each other with knowing smiles. They finally realised what was going on.

"Are you sure you're okay?" he tried to brush it off, gesturing to the Basterds to continue with the scalping. "It's fuckin' bleedin' a lot!"

"It's fine. Nothing too serious, Lieutenant." Y/N replied.

Aldo just shook his head as he took off his scarf and tied it around the wound. "No one would hurt ya again, or I'd kill 'em."

•••

The Basterds got ordered to rest a bit because there was a big mission on its way. They didn't know what it was but they all welcomed a full night sleep.

But Y/N didn't feel like going to bed. Instead, she took her cigarettes and sat at the balcony of the apartment they got settled in.

It was a chilly night but she didn't mind. She actually liked cold more than heat.

"Aldo seems a bit off lately." Donny's voice broke the silence as he positioned himself next to her.

"What you mean?" she asked offering him a cigarette which he gladly accepted.

"Remember how he beated up the German officer two weeks ago? I've never seen him like that."

"Oh Donny. He's just a badass with a good heart. I assure you, Aldo's just fine."

Donny shrugged but didn't say anything. This wasn't his secret to tell even though the change in Aldo's behaviour towards her was so damn obvious.

Donowitz glanced at Y/N smiling a bit. He understood why Aldo fell for the female Basterd.

•••

Bridget von Hammersmark was laying in front of them with a bullet in her leg while Hugo, Archie and Wicki were dead.

Y/N was standing in the corner of the room, lost in her thoughts, mourning for her lost friends. She knew something like that had to happen but she also believed in Basterds and part of her thought that they'll all come back home one day.

Y/N wasn't able to look at the actress anymore. She quickly left the room not looking at anyone while she lighted her cigarette. It'd been becoming too much to handle for her.

"Are you alright?" Aldo frowned as he walked towards her. "You still in?"

She laughed sarcastically at his question sheaking her head. "Yeah, of course, business. I'm in, Lieutenant."

"I didn't mean in like that and ya know it."

"Yeah, sorry. It's just-"

"I know, Sergeant. This whole event got me thinkin'. I gotta tell you something."

Y/N threw away her cigarette as she looked directly at him. She wasn't sure if it was the light or the sentiment, but Aldo's eyes never seemed so beautiful to her like they did in that moment.

"The truth is," Raine began as he stepped closer, "you make me feel... you make me feel, Sergeant."

•••

When Y/N stepped into the room in a black plain tight dress, the conversation between the Basterds immediately stopped. They'd never seen her in anything but in uniform or the civilian clothes. Donny dropped the glass of whiskey he was drinking, Hugo's knife fell on the ground with a loud crash, Omar and Wicki stayed there with their mouths wide opened, Archie Hicox smirked and Aldo, Aldo was taken away and wasn't able to get out a word.

"Please, gentlemen! This is how you welcome a beautiful woman? She looks magnificent!" Bridget von Hammersmark exclaimed gesturing towards Y/N.

"It's so uncomfortable," Y/N frowned and tried to adjust the dress a little, "and so impractical."

"I think it's perfect." Aldo breathed out and Bridget smiled in satisfaction.

Y/N truly looked like a completely new person. And Aldo's feelings mixed once again. She was so special to him, like water is special to desert. His life was dry without an excitment. She was the water that refreshed him after a long time of loneliness.

•••

Bridget, Aldo, Y/N, Donny and Omar stepped into the small local cinema, already so full of Nazi officers.

"It makes me sick." Y/N snorted as she looked around on the German uniforms. "I have two knives and a gun and I'm not afraid to use them right now."

Aldo laughed next to her and gallantly put his hand on her hip pulling her closely to him.

"Just relax, darlin'. We'll do that later." Aldo winked at her, not letting her go for a moment.

Bridget suddenly seemed like she'd seen a ghost. An older man approached their little group and Y/N immediately understood with whom they have the honor.

Bridget and Hans Landa shared a short conversation before they turned to them. Hammersmark formally introduced the Basterds and Y/N flinched a little under the German's look. Aldo noticed right away her change of attitude and stroked her hip gently.

"Sei assolutamente incredibile, signorina! Ho notato che molti ufficiali hanno voltato la testa dopo di te." (You look absolutely stunning, miss! I noticed that many officers turned their head after you.) Hans Landa grinned and Y/N thought it was the most disgusting thing ever.

"Grazie mille signore. Sono sicuro che stai esagerando." (Thank you very much, sir. I'm sure you're exaggerating.) Y/N faked a smile and clenched her hand in fist to remain calm.

All of the Basterds with Bridget jerked their heads towards her. Her fluent Italian took them away as well as Landa.

"Quanto amo la lingua italiana! E dalla bocca di una donna così bella, è una musica per le mie orecchie." (How I love the Italian language! And from the mouth of such a beautiful lady, it's a music for my ears.)

"Mi stai adulando, signor Landa. Non hai un brutto aspetto." (You're flattering me, Mr Landa. You don't look so bad yourself.) Y/N felt like vomitting any next second.

Aldo had enough of Landa's fake attitude, especially how Y/N looked so stressed and angry. He decided he has to step in or she won't hold herself back. Aldo recalled the one sentence he learnt yesterday, just in case he'd need to interrupt a moment in a formal way. This was the time.

"Baciami, adesso." (Kiss me, right now.) he stated and pulled Y/N even closer than before. She didn't manage to prostest or ask a quick question and their lips touched. She returned the kiss immediately and ran her fingers through his hair.

Until someone coughed.

They pulled apart from each other, Aldo smiling widely like a winner and Y/N blushing harder than ever.

"Ci scusi signore. Il mio ragazzo qui è un tipo appassionato. Devi perdonarlo." (Excuse us, sir. My boyfriend here is the passionate kind. You must forgive him.) Y/N stuttered and but looked directly at Landa.

•••

Operation Kino was over and it was now only her, Aldo and Utivich. They lost everybody along the way. They stood together side by side through everything. They'd become something stronger than family, friends, lovers. They faced death together and nothing could break the bond they'd created over the years. It was time to go home.

Y/N stood on the ship that was taking the Basterds, or what was left of them, home. The wind was dancing on her hair whispering secrets in her ears.

"I never thought I'd make it back home." Aldo Raine appeared next to her with a cigarette between his lips.

"None of us thought so, Lieutenant." she nodded, "but the difference is, we were wrong. Not them."

"Smart as always." Aldo grinned as he turned to her. "You should stop calling me Lieutenant. The war's over."

Y/N giggled at his statement and he could swear he'd never heard something so melodic, something so right.

"It kinda sticked with you, Lieutenant."

Aldo didn't answer, instead he threw away the cigarette and took some deep breaths. He needed whiskey, or anything else that would give him at least a bit of courage.

Aldo Raine fought in war, he saw his friends die, he was broken by everything he saw and still, asking Y/N a simple question seemed harder than surviving the bloodshed.

"Spill it out, Lieutenant." she laughed as she glanced at him.

"I hate how ya always do that. But here it goes," Aldo replied, "I've never been good at this so I'll just keep it short."

He stopped for a moment and stared at the woman in front of him. As he stepped closer, his heart was already racing like it'd never before.

"Why don't ya come to the States with me? We can buy some little house in the Smoky Mountains and live there for the rest of our fuckin' lives." Aldo confessed in his Raine kind of way, looking at her with so much hope in his eyes.

"Is this some kind of your proposal?" Y/N chuckled as she intertwined her fingers with his.

"Maybe."

"I thought you'd never ask! Of course I'll come with you! You're everything I have, Aldo."

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la5t-res0rt · 4 years ago

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this was written several weeks ago in response to asks i was receiving i am posting it now it is very long the longest i have ever made and it is not very well edited but here it is in this final essay i talk about how shitty rae is about black people in her writing as well as just me talking about how her writing sucks in general lets begin

hello everyone

as you may know i have received a lot of anons in the last week or so about issues of racism in the beetlejuice community both just generally speaking and also within specific spaces

i was very frustrated to not be getting the answers i wanted because i typically do not talk about what i do not see but in an effort to be better about discourse i went looking through discourse from before my time in the fandom and i also received some receipts and information from my followers and from some friends

keep in mind that the voices and thoughts of bipoc are not only incredibly important at all times but in this circumstance it is important that if a bipoc has something to add you listen and learn and be better

i admit that when this happened i wasnt aware of the extent of what occurred and im angry at myself for not doing more at that time and i want to work harder to make sure something like this doesnt go unnoticed again

im a hesitant to talk about months old discourse because i have been criticized for bringing up quote old new unquote but this is very important and i am willing to face whatever comes from to me

lets talk about this

content from our local racist idiot that may be months old but its important

putting my thoughts under a cut to spare the dash but before i begin obviously this is awful

lets fucking unpack this folks

right out the gate op states that she supports artistic freedom but then within a couple words she goes against that statement

being entirely canon compliant isnt artistic freedom and even so if this person has so much respect for canon they wouldnt be out here erasing lydias obvious disgust for beetlejuice in the movie or ignoring lydias age for the sake of shipping that shit isnt canon either

also we love the quick jab at the musical there hilarious we love it dont we because god forbid a licensed and successful branch on a media have any standing in this conversation but whatever

now lets scroll down and talk about the term racebending

the term racebending was coined around 2009 in response to the avatar the last airbender movie a film in which the east asian races of the characters were erased by casting white actors in the three leading roles of aang sokka and katara

whenever the term racebending is used in a negative light it is almost always a case of whitewashing like casting scarlett johansen in ghost in the shell or the casting of white actors of the prince of persia sands of time instead of iranian ones

this kind of racebending erases minorities from beeing seen in media and is wrong

all that being said however racebending has also been noted to have very positive after effects like the 1997 adaptation of cinderella or casting samuel jackson as nick fury in the marvel movies nick fury was originally a white guy can you even imagine

i read this piece from an academic that said quote writers can change the race and cultural specificity of central characters or pull a secondary character of color from the margins transforming them into the central protagonist unquote

racebending like the kind that rae is so heated about is the kind of creative freedom that leads to more representation of bipoc in media which will never be a bad thing ever no matter how pissy you get about it

designing a version of a character as a poc isnt serving to make them necessarily better it serves to give new perspective and perhaps the opportunity to connect even more deeply with a character it doesnt marginalize or erase white people it can uplift poc and if you think uplifting poc is wrong because it tears down white people or whatever youre a fucking moron and you need to get out of your podunk white folk town and see the real world

the numbers of times a bipoc particularly a bipoc that is also lgbt+ has been represented in media are dwarfed by what i as a white dude have seen myself represented in media is and that isnt okay that isnt equality and its something that should change not only in mainstream media but in fandom spaces as well

lets move down a bit further to the part about bullying straight people which is hilarious and lets also talk about the term fetishistic as well lets start with that

this person literally writes explicit pornography of a minor and an adult are we really going to let someone like that dictate what is and what isnt fetishistic

similarly to doing a positive racebend situation people may project lgbt+ headcanons on a character because its part of who they are and it helps them feel closer to the character and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that

depicting lgbt+ subject matter on existing characters isnt an inherently fetishistic action generally things only really become fetishistic when the media is being crafted and hyped by people who are outside of lgbt+ community for example how young teens used to flip a tit about yaoi or how chasers fetishize trans people

but drawing a character with top surgery scars or headcanoning them as trans is harmless and its just another way to interpret a character literally anone could be trans unless if their character bio says theyre cis and most of them dont go that deep so it really is open to interpretation and on the whole most creators encourage this sort of exploration because it is a good thing to get healthy representation out in the world

as for it being used to bully straights thats just funny i dont have anything else on that like if youre straight and you feel threatened and bullied because of someone headcanoning someone as anything that isnt cishet youre a fucking idiot and a weak baby idiot at that like the real world must fucking suck for you because lgbt+ people are everywhere and statistically a big chunk of your favorite characters arent cishet sorry be mad about it

lets roll down a bit further about the big meat of the issue which was when several artists were drawing interpretations of lydia as a black girl which i loved but clearly this person didnt love it because they have a very narrow and very racist and problematic view of what it means to be a black person

and before i move forward i must reiderate that i am a white person and you should listen to the thoughts of poc people like @fright-of-their-lives or @gender-chaotic it is not my place to explain what the black experience is like and it certainly isnt this persons either

implying that the story of a black person isnt worth telling unless if the character faces struggles like racism and prejudice is downright moronic

why use the word kissable to describe a black persons lips now thats what i call fetishistic and its to another extreme if youre talking about a black version of lydia on top of that

the author of this post says herself that shes white so clearly shes the person whos an authority on the black experience and what it means to be a black person right am i reading that right or am i having a fucking conniption

how about allowing black characters to exist without having to struggle why cant a black version of lydia just be a goth teenager with a ghost problem who likes photography and is also black like she doesnt have to move to a hick town and get abused by racist folks she doesnt have to go through any more shit than she already goes through and if you honestly think thats the only way to tell a black persons story you need to get your brain cleaned

you know nothing about the complexities about being a black person and i dont either but you know wh odo black people who are doing black versions of canon characters they fucking know

lets squiggle down just a bit further

so the writer has issues with giving characters traits like a broad nose or larger lips if theyre a woman but if theyre a man suddenly its totally okay to go all ryan murphy ahs coven papa legba appropriation when approaching character design like are you fucking stupid do you hear yourself is that really how you see black men like what the fuck is wrong with you

none of the shit youre spewing takes bravery it takes ignorance and supreme levels of stupidity

do you really think you with your fic where a black lgbt+ woman is tortured and abused where you use the n word with a hard r to refer to her like that shits not okay its fucking depraved and yeah we know you love being shitty but like christ on a bike thats so much

can we also talk about this

what the fuck is this fetishistic bull roar garbage calling this black character beyonce dressing her up in quote fuck me heels unquote are you are you seriously gonna write this and say its a shining example of how to write a black character youre basically saying ope here she is shes a sex icon haha im so progressive and i clealry understand the black experience hahahaha fuck you oh my god

on top of that theres a point where this character is only referred to as curly hair or the fact that the n word is used in the fic with the hard r like thats hands down not okay for you to use especially not in a manner like this jesus christ

oop heres a little more a sampling for you of the hell i am enduring in reading this drivel

oh boy lets put a leash on the angry black woman character lets put her in a leash and have the man imply hes a master like are you kidding me are you for real and what the fuck is with calling her shit like j lo and beyonce do you actually think thats clever at all are you just thinking of any poc that comes into your head for this

also lydia fucking tells this girl that she shouldnt have lost her temper like she got fucking leashed im so tired why is this writing so problematic and also so bad

hold up before i lose my head lets look at some of her own comments on the matter of this character and what happens to her

hi hello youre just casually tossing the word lynch out there in the wide open world as if thats not a problem that is still real like are you fucking unhinged there have been multiple cases of this exact thing happening in our firepit of a country in the last five months alone like how can you still have shit like this up for people to read how can you be proud of work like this in this climate

and also what the fuck is that last bit

what the actual fuck

i dont speak for black people as a white person but you do!? im sorry i had to get my punctuation out for that because wow thats fucking asinine just because one black person read your fic and didnt find the torture and abuse of your one black character abhorrant doesnt mean that the vast majority of people not only in the fandom but in the human population with decency are going to think its okay because its not

i started this post hoping to be level headed and professional but jesus fucking christ this woman is something else white nationalism is alive and well folks and its name is rae

if you defend this woman you defend some truly abhorrant raecism

editors notes

in order to get some perspective on these issues more fully some of the writing by the author was examined and on the whole it was pretty unreadable but i want to just call back to the very beginning of this essay where the person in question talked about holding canon in high regard but then in their writing they just go around giving people magic and shit and ignoring the end of the movie entirely like are you canon compliant or nah

the writing doesnt even read like beetlejuice fanfic it reads as self indulgent fiction you could easily change the names and its just a bad fanfic from 2007

also can we talk about writing the lesbian character as an angry man hater like its 2020 dude and als olets touch on that girl on girl pandering while beetlejuice is just there like here we go fetishizing again wee

i cant find a way to work this into this already massive post but

im going to throw up

okay so thats a lot we have covered a lot today and im sure my ask box will regret it but this definitely should have been more picked apart when it happened

please feel free to add more to this i would love more perspectives than just my own.

#long post #racism #raecism #im so tired #thanks for reading

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pumpumdemsugah · 4 years ago

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I was literally sat with my mouth open after reading that philosophytube reply. The condescension. The misogynist racism. The clear smugness from someone who believes they are in the right and get to school a silly Black woman for her silly little opinion. I just can't.

Its misogyny plain and simple because Black men are also “gendered” in an othered way that Black women are but no one see those signs during the civil rights movement that said “I AM A MAN” and starts talking about gender. They talk about racism, they talk about Black peoples humanity, they talk about the role white people play, they talk about Black men as people . The fact that its absent from when people talk about Black women shows a misogynistic streak amount progressive white people

Imagine if my Black ass decided the way im going to talk about solidarity with trans women is to describe their bodies and looks in SAME MANNER people that demean them do? Imagine if word for word i repeated all the shit people say to trans people when they humiliate them and then talk about my self and use words like dehumanisation, racism etc etc naming the problem not describing it with oppressor language

You lot would lose your fucking minds because there is something rather inappropriate, fetishistic and voyeuristic about using the same language to describe a group of people you’re claiming solidarity with that their oppressors do when you’re part of that oppressor group but not doing that for your selves. If you’re going to describe in detail what and how white supremacist talk about my Black body do that shit with your own oppression and tell me if it doesn’t feel like a violation if someone not in your group did that shit

Imagine if a white gay man or white cis woman fixed their mouths to talk about Black women like that to talk about solidarity, we’d think that’s racist and stepping into territory you do not belong.

Its disrespect and what makes it more disrespectful is this mother fucker reads alot and researches alot but fuck the cis Black women that wrote the shit you’re claiming they made certain claims. Cite people who made work talking about them instead because clearly Black people are interchangeable until they agree with you. Why don’t you read the original text? Is it because they weren’t saying that?

None of this will impact philosophy tubes career. You can be as flippant and grotesques about Black women as you want and it costs you NOTHING. You can lie you ass off about what Black feminist said and it will cost you nothing because there will always be some socially isolated Black idiot there to carry water for these people and its why we’re brought up.

Don’t bring up Black women if you’re going to talk about your self. Solidarity doesn’t mean treating us like a Boris bike.

Its obvious philosophy tube has never spent any fucking time reading a god damn word any Black woman has said. Its always obvious when people don’t know shit about Black feminism to me cause they just repeat shit and talk about themselves

There no reciprocity because i couldn’t and i would not talk about trans women like in the name of “solidarity” but white trans people have no issue and its the first thing they do when they want to go viral. Everyone wants a piece of us without really talking to us. Its ugly

#anonymous #messages

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gettin-bi-bi-bi · 4 years ago

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im really confused with (my) gender :( I wish I knew what gender even means, because for people outside the queer community it is just your genials, your boobs, your clothing, your hair, and your height. Are those things gendered or are humans gendered ? and if something is gendered what makes it gendered, what does men and women mean ? Ive been thinking about this and I just don't know, the only thing I know is that I love wearing big clothes, looking like a mushroom on a suit and I love being called bonito (means pretty boy in spanish because spanish adjectifs are gendered:( )

my main struggle is that, I don't even know what gender is or means, how I'm I supposed to apply something that I don't understand to my daily life ? how am I supposed to explore my gender identity if I don't know what gender is/means?

Hi anon. I can only answer from my experiences here and other people can probably input with other ideas from their perspectives too, but perhaps you are a binary trans person, perhaps you are non binary. But perhaps you’re neither, I mean questioning and wondering about gender doesn’t HAVE to mean you’re not actually cisgender. Also I am wondering, are you neurodivergent maybe? Because this struggling to understand gender is especially common I think amongst many neurodivergent people. Not that neurotypical people necessarily can easily make sense of it either but it often seems to be even more difficult for neurodivergent people to figure it out. That is probably a big part of the reason why a lot of newer gender labels exist (the sort that bigots love to mock and invalidate) not because all of them are actually describing the person’s gender but because in some cases they’re describing the vagueness of it and a person’s inability to describe it in any more specific terms often because of their neurodivergency (things like autism, various mental illnesses or even some physical illnesses which can impact on the brain and its functioning). There are the terms like genderqueer and non binary or queer used specifically in reference to gender, which can be used as umbrella terms or they can be used just as labels in themselves and these can be used by anyone, neurodivergent or neurotypical. But there are loads of other terms people have come up with for genders and people are inventing new words for them all the time and some of those do relate to specific things like autism or chronic illness which can affect a person’s understanding of gender.

I’m not saying by the way just because you’re confused that automatically makes you non binary - you might be, or you might be a binary trans person, or you might be cis and just confused. But if you think perhaps you might be non binary I will say that you may be better trying to find some sort of blog/group/forum that is specifically for non binary people so you can get input from a wider range of non binary people and see if any of their experiences resonate with you.

In the end though only you can really say what you are as well as what gender means (or doesn’t mean) to you. I think probably gender means different things to different people and how they work out what they are, probably it can be difficult for a lot of people to figure out, quite probably even a lot of cisgender people. I think really ultimately gender is just a feeling, and sometimes I think perhaps it’s as much a feeling about what you aren’t as about what you actually are. Like, if you feel for example you’re not a woman, well that might be a starting point to work out what you are. It might mean you’re a man, or it might mean you’re something else entirely. Maybe you’re agender/genderless and can’t figure it out for that reason? Although you’d probably be best asking agender people about that if you think that might be the case for you, because I’m not agender myself.

Also for some people, they don’t stick with one term all the time. Their gender itself might change (because they’re genderfluid or something like that). Or they might just find a better term or label after a period of using one label. Changing labels for whatever reason is fine, you don’t have to pick one and then just stick with it forever if it’s not right for you or your ideas about your gender change over time.

Society and the culture that we all live in, whatever society and culture that is, will usually tend to gender things like clothing, hairstyles, colours even, as well as genitals and body shapes/types and that sort of thing. And course the more obvious transphobes love reducing gender down to “biological sex” and, essentially just what genitalia you were born with. That’s probably not going to change any time soon unfortunately, but it doesn’t mean those things inherently have a gender, it’s just society in general and these bigoted individuals and small groups as well projecting onto them. You can be any gender and have any body type/body features, wear any kind of clothing, have any hairstyle, etc. Obviously in many cases realistically it’s not going to be perceived that way by the rest of society and that fact is going to put off both many binary trans and non binary people from expressing themselves in the way they’d truly like to because they can’t deal with all the inevitable misgendering and perhaps even worse than that from society. Likely that even puts off many cis people from dressing and appearing the way they truly want to, because of society’s reactions to it. But really, what you wear, how you present yourself to the world, it is your decision, and in terms of things like the clothing you wear, just do what feels comfortable and right to you.

I can’t really answer though what gender means or is, not even for me. Gender is a human construct, a product of us having a brain and a mind and feeling things, emotions, thoughts, and creating language and words and having a need to communicate with others. But it is a very vague thing really and it’s hard probably for anyone to define what it actually is. I certainly can’t say how cis people know what gender they are because I’m not cis. I am non binary and also I am neurodivergent (probably in multiple ways), and I know what binary gender I am not and feel no connection at all with and I know which binary gender I lean more towards and connect with a lot but... it’s still hard to pin down in more concrete terms. I don’t really feel a need myself to be more specific though but everyone’s different, some people might need more specific terms. It’s OK to want those but it’s OK too to be fine with using more vague terms, and it’s OK to not actually care much about what you are or how people perceive you. And it’s also OK to be confused and question things and take a long time to work it out and it’s OK to change labels too so I mean, please don’t get too into thinking this stuff over to the point where it’s actually causing you distress and worry, in the grand scheme of things it’s really not that important to the state of the world or the universe or anything what gender you are, and whatever label(s) you pick is your choice and something that should be meaningful and useful to you and if questioning all of this is not useful to you then you don’t have to do it.

I’m sorry if this is pretty vague but I really don’t think there is a proper definition of what gender is, or one obvious way of working it out. It’s a very vague and abstract thing relating to very abstract things (thoughts, feelings) and it is also a very personal thing that almost certainly varies wildly from person to person.

- Tiger

#Anonymous

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chicagopd2020 · 4 years ago

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New Beginnings Are Good For Everyone Ch.5

Waking up the next morning was one of the easiest things she ever done, which was weird because she hated monday mornings so much. But getting up and going through her morning routine just to make sure everything is right before she heads out for her first day as member of the Chicago PD Intellgence Unit. Kim had a little extra pep in her step and she was happy about it because it hadnt been there in a long time. She grabbed her jacket & keys ready to walk out the door. She stops for coffee to make sure that doesnt hit a wall in the middle of the day.

Kim walks into the station and she sees Sargent Platt, she decides that the best thing to do is to talk to her and to see what she is suppose to do. She stands there silently as Sargent Platt finishes the conversation with the officers in blue. When Trudy looks up and notices Kim she tells the officers to move along. She welcomes her back and asks if she is ready for her first day.

Kim replies happily that she was more than ready to prove herself to everyone. She kept small conversation with Trudy until Trudy looks behind her and notices one of the members of the Intelligence Unit.

Upton?

Yes Sargent?

You know Agent Kim Burgess?

Yes I know Kim

Well would mind buzzing her upstairs with you just until we can get her into the system.

Of course, follow me Kim and show you where you are going to start spending most of your time

Oh I cant wait.

I promise you that will change, I love my job but you have no time for a personal life.

I guess that it is a good thing that I am a woman focusing on her career right now and not a romantic relationship.

They carry on with their conversation with their small climb of the stairs, Hailey walks her to Voights office and wishes her good luck even though she knows she will see her in just a couple mins.

Kim welcome to your first day as a memeber of intellgence, just want to go over a few things while we wait on the last couple people to show up. He starts going over the rules and not that there was many rules but he lives strongly by the few rules that he has.

Kim has noticed that Hank Voight is not your normal Sargent but she wasnt wanting normal she was just wanting to serve justice for the city of Chicago. She continues to listen intently to what Voight is saying taking everything he was saying to the heart so she knows what not to do to get on his bad side. I am going to give you a few weeks to study everything, I have set up your test in two weeks for you detective exam. The moment finally comes to where he asks if she had any questions

I will make sure that I study up on everything that I need to know so that I can pass the test of my first try. I say things like that so I can keep it in my mind that I will pass the test and that I can do anything I put my mind to.

I know that everyone is partnered up with someone, I was just curious who my partner was going to be? I know that no matter who I am with that I will have a great partner. This team just seems like they have each others back no matter if they are actually partners or not.

That we do Kim we are family here, Whatever one member of the intellgence is going through everyone feels the pain, I know that it is weird to say buts it true. We have our fights like any of family but at the end of the day we will have each others back no matter what.

That is exactly what I want because at the FBI yes it was everyone worked as a team but at the end of the day everyone was only watching out for theirselves and if they had the chance to do it they would throw someone under the bus in a heartbeat. That was until Erin came I knew that she would have my back no matter what and she was the only thing that I was going to the miss about it and that was it.

Good to hear Kim, he looks out the window and notices that the whole team is here. Come on lets go out to the bullpin and I will let everyone know all at once who you are going to partnered with.

The door opens and everyones eyes looks toward the door and sees Kim and Hank exiting, Hank finally speaks up, So as everyone of you know Agent Burgess as of today is officially a member of Intellgence and I think she is going to be an amazing addition to the team and I want you all to make her feel at welcome. So as of today Burgess you are going to partnered up with Halstead, Upton you will be with Ruzek and Atwater you will be Olinksy.

Hailey showed Kim where her desk would be, which was actually her old desk. Hank liked the partners to be close to each other that shows they can work as a team not only on the street but in the close quarters of an office.

The first couple hours was kind of quiet just everyone going over cases they had been working on. When Voight walks out of the office and catches all of their attenion.

We have a case, We are looking at a small drug smuggling team that is somewhat new to the city, and one of the leaders of the team is trying to look normal or something because he has a nine to five job and he doesnt live in these high priced homes to make it not look so obvious but the others, they are staying hid very well because there has been no trace of any clues as to who any of his partners are. This is Lorenzo Lopez he is best known as Enzo.

Kim finally looks away from the file in her hands and takes a look at the picture hanging on the board, and her eyes go huge. She looks over a Jay and they share this look knowing that this was the neighbor that Jay thought was very sketchy. Voight must have caught onto that look, cause he questioned them.

What is that look the two of you just shared?

Well it turns out that he lives in our building and right next door to Kim. He just moved into the apartment a few weeks ago and he seemed kind of sketchy but I never really thought anything of it.

Kim was just lost in her thoughts that she didnt really hear the conversation that was going on. Until Jay tapped her shoulder to get her attention. She slightly jumped that never happens, she just thought that she left him in the past and now she was going to be apart of the team to send him to prison and honestly she cant say that she was upset about it. It was one of the main reasons that she left him she knew that the business that he was in wasnt legal and there was no way in hell that she was going to let him mess up her career.

Kim are you alright?

Yeah, Im just thinking about someway, anyway that we can take him down.

Jay wasnt buying it but it was her first day he wasnt going to push the boundaries just yet. So he just let it go for now.

Halstead you and Burgess go talk to your CI'S and see if they know anything about this. Everyone just keep digging into his past and see what you can dig up.

Kim heard the last sentence and knew that she had to tell someone about her connection to the suspect before someone actually figured it out and wonder why she didnt tell them, so who is best to tell then her partner.

They get into Jay's truck and head out and she knew that if she didnt talk about it now that she never would. She lets out this deep breathe

Jay I need to tell you something.

You can tell me anything. Im here for you

Its about the suspect that we are looking into, you know last night when I said something under my breathe about our sketchy neighbor

Yeah, what about it?

Well, what I didnt tell you is that I know Enzo very very well

How well?

As in we were together for over a year

What?!?!

Yeah, when we first met he was normal like any other guy but then the longer that we were together its like I just didnt get the same vibe from him that I used to. When we would spend time together I would feel uneasy that something could go wrong at any minute. So after that night I just told him that I think that it was best if we seen other people and that I didnt see a future with him. Lets just say that he didnt take it the best and i had to end up moving somewhere else but a few weeks before I found out that I got the job here I felt as if I was being followed and yet somehow we end being neighbors. I didnt want to think nothing much about it when I first set eyes on him but it just seems like he found out from someone that I was moving here and just thought that maybe if he lived here first that I wouldnt think nothing about it.

Kim you definetly have to tell Voight about this

I know I just didnt think that I would ever see him again

Even though you never thought you would see him again doesnt change anything he is our main suspect and you could be the reason he is in Chicago and that may actually lead us to him, I would never actually make you do anything that would put you in danger I hope you know this

I do know this, but whatever helps put him behind bars quicker I am willing to help

Jay talked to a couple of his CI'S and they were not much help, So they started back toward the station when Halstead got a message with an address to meet the rest of the team. As they arrived they seen the team surrounding something on the ground and as they made it to their side they seen that it was a woman who couldnt have been not much older than 25 and she was laying there with a cut throat.

Do we think that this has anything to do with Enzo and his men? Kim questioned

We wont know anything until we get the autopsy back. Says Voight

Sarge is there anyway that I can have a word with you

Yeah, sure

They walked far enough away that nobody would be able to hear what they were talking about. She told him everything that she told Jay and hoped that whatever she told him would help.

Kim I know that wasnt easy to say but I am glad that you told me before we had to find it out on our own and then it would have looked bad on your end and looked like you were hiding something.

Thats what I thought and Jay told me that I should tell you right away and I feel so much better now that I did.

They join back up with the team and all head back to the station. Once they make it back to the station everyone gathers around the board and Voight feels the team in on everything you told him and they tried to figure out what was the best way they could get his guards down long enough for someone to get into his place to bug his apartment or even his phone.

Kim was the first person to speak up.

I think we know the only person that he is going to even let into his apartment is me

Kim you dont have to do this...Voight and Jay say at the same time

Your right I dont but I know that this is my job and that it is the right thing to do. You could always be close enough to that if I feel threathened that you will be right there.

If you are sure that you want to do this then we will do it

Its the furthest from what I want to do but its what I know needs to be done.

Alright everyone we will put everything in motion tonight. So get ready

Kim cant believe she is the one that thought of this but I think in the end its the only thing that would have made sense, Its the only way they will be able to bust him

#jay halstead imagine #jay halstead x reader #Jay halstead x kim burgess #kim burgess #chicagopd #chicago pd x reader

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somnilogical · 5 years ago

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davis tower kingsley (listed here on the cfar instructor page) who harassed a cis woman about her appearance another cis women reported this to acdc (the people who wrote the thing about how brent was great) and afaict they did nothing, claims that if trans people and gay people dont "repent and submit to the pope" they will burn in hell, defended the spanish inquisitions, wrote about how the mission system werent actually abductions, slavery, forced conversions and this was propaganda, defends pretty much any atrocity that an authority, "believes" the catholic god exists and does not try and destroy them, submits to them. and so much more.

born into another era they would actually work for the california mission system and say it was good.

said thing that cached out to that emma and somni should repent and submit to the rationalist community. wrote up a rant about "how about fuck you. go lick the boots of your dark mistress anna salamon." didnt send. got kicked by some rationalist, reasoning is probably that what id say would disrupt their peaceful machinations of omnicide, would be infohazards, because... the information is hazardous to their social order.

a few of these things are subjects of future blog posts.

cfar has never hired a trans woman, i have lots of logs of them trying to do what people did to porpentine. claiming emma thinks torturing children is hot, claiming emma was physically violent, claiming emma was indistinguishable from a rapist, claiming ziz was a "gross uncle style abuser", claiming somni was enticing people to rape, claiming that anna salamon was a small fragile woman and ziz was large and had muscles. as if any of our strength or speed had anything to do with our muscles in this place. all of these things are false except relative size difference between ziz and anna which is just transmisogynistic and irrelevant.

if they lie about are algorithms claim that we are using male-typical strategies and then they can fail by these lies and be sidelined by callout posts that transfered 350,000$ from miri despite their best efforts to cover this up. (all benefited by having relative political advantagr flowing from estrogenized brain modules. men are kind of npc's in this particular game of fem v fem cyberontological warfare for the fate of the multiverse, mostly making false patriarchal assumptions that ziz was doing things for social status. like status sensitivity is hormonally mediated, your experiences are not universal. or saying like kingsley is saying that people should repent and submit to whatever authorities in the rationalist region they submit to. NO. FUCK YOU. i will not repent and submit to your abusive dark mistress anna salamon.

i knew anna salamon was doing the edgy "transfems are all secretly male" thing before i talked with ziz. it was a thing, {zack, carrie}, ben hoffman, michael vassar were also in on it. ppl had men trapped in mens bodies on their bookshelves because the cool people were reading it. didnt think she was being *transmisogynistic* about it until i talked with ziz. in retrospect i was naive.)

also? anarchistic coordination ive had with people have been variously called lex's cluster, somni's cluster, ziz's cluster by authoritarians who cant imagine power structures between people that arent hierarchical. like based on who they want to say is "infohazardously corrupting people" emma goldman had to deal with this shit too where the cops tried to say she was friends with anyone who thought anarchism made sense. people she didnt know at all who did their own anarchism. because authoritarians dont think in terms of philosophy, they think any challenge to their power is a disease that needs to be eliminated and you just need to doxx their network.

like if ziz and somni and emma were all actually infohazardous rapists as people keep trying to claim we are and then saying "oh no i didnt mean it i swear" and then doing it again. what would happen isnt that a bunch of infohazardous rapists start talking and working together for a common goal. what actually happens with people of that neurotype is they partition up the territory into rival areas of feeding on people like gangs do.

like they dont get together and start talking a lot about decision theory and cooperate in strange new ways.

not that the people lying about emma, ziz, gwen, somni and others are trying to have accurate beliefs. they are trying what all athoritarians try with anarchist groups. unfortunately for them, ive read the meta, i know dread secrets of psychology and cooperation that they claim are like painful static and incomprehensible, yet despite being "incomprehensible" are almost certainly harmful. if harm is to be judged against upholding the current regime, and the current regime is evil, then lots of true information and good things will look harmful. like ive tested this out in different social spheres what people claim is "incomprehensible" is the stuff that destroys whatever regime they are working in. like someone said i sounded like i was crazy and homeless and couldnt understand me when i pointed out that reorienting your life, your time, your money, to a human who happens to be genetically related to you for 16 years is altruistic insanity. just do the math. eliezer, anna, michael, brian tomasik all once took heroic responsibility for the world at some point in their lives and could do a simple calculation and make the right choice. none of them have children.

pretending that peoples "desires" "control them", when "desires" are part of the boundary of the brain, part of the brains agency and are contingent on what you expect to get out of things. like before stabbing myself with a piece of metal would make me feel nauseated, id see black dots, and feel faint. but after i processed that stabbing myself would cure brain damage and make me more functional, all this disappeared.

most people who "want" to have children have this desire downstream of a belief that someone else will take heroic responsibility for the world, they dont need to optimize as much. there are other competent people. if they didnt they would feel differently and make different choices.

you can see the contingency of how people feel about something on what they get out of it lots of places. like:

<<Meanwhile, a Ngandu woman confessed, "after losing so many infants I lost courage to have sex.">>

but people lie about how motivation works, in order to protect the territory of saying "well i just need a steady input of nubile fems so i can concentrate and be super altruistic!" or "i just need spend 16 years of life reorienting around humans who happen to be genetically related to me and my friends so i can concentrate and be super altruistic!" when neither of these are true. these people just want nubile fems, they just want babies. (the second one has much much less negative externalities though. you could say i am using my female brain modules to say "yeah the archetypically female strat, though it has the same amount of lying, is less harmful". but like it actually is less directly harmful. the harm from gaslighting people downstream of diverting worldsaving resources and structure to secure a place to {hit on fems, raise babies} is ruinous. means that worldsaving plans that interfere with either of these are actively fought. and the knowledge that neither of these are altruistic optimizations, neither is Deeply Wise they are as dumb in terms of global optimization as they seem initially, is agentically buried.

this warps things in deep ways, that were a priori unexpected to me.)

this is obvious, but when i talk about it, the objection isnt that it doesnt make utilitarian sense, the objection is that "im talking like a crazy person". authoritarians say this to me too when i assert my right to my property that they took, act like im imposing on them. someone else asked if i could "act like a human" and do what he wanted me to do when i was thinking and talking with my friends. all of these things authoritarians have said to me "act like a human" "talk like a normal person i cant understand you" were to coerce my submission. they construct the category of "human" and then say im in violation of it and this is wrong and i should rectify it. i am talking perfectly good english right now. you can read this.

anna salamon, kelsey piper, elle, pete michaud, and many others all try to push various narratives of somni, emma, ziz, gwen and others being in the buckets {RAPIST, PSYCHO, BRAINWASHED}. im not a rapist, im not psychotic, im not brainwashed. before ziz came along, people were claiming i was brainwashing people, its a narrative they keep reusing.

porpentine talks about communities that do this, that try and pull trap doors beneath trans women:

<<For years, queer/trans/feminist scenes have been processing an influx of trans fems, often impoverished, disabled, and/or from traumatic backgrounds. These scenes have been abusing them, using them as free labor, and sexually exploiting them. The leaders of these scenes exert undue influence over tastemaking, jobs, finance, access to conferences, access to spaces. If someone resists, they are disappeared, in the mundane, boring, horrible way that many trans people are susceptible to, through a trapdoor that can be activated at any time. Housing, community, reputation—gone. No one mourns them, no one asks questions. Everyone agrees that they must have been crazy and problematic and that is why they were gone.>>

https://thenewinquiry.com/hot-allostatic-load/

(a mod of rationalist feminists deleted this almost immediately from the group as [[not being a good culture fit]], not being relevant to rationalism, and written in the [[wrong syntax]]. when its literally happening right now, they are trying to trapdoor transfems who protest and rebel asap. just like google.)

canmom on tumblr talks about the strategic use of "incomprehensibility" against transfems. and how its not about "comprehensibility". i have a different theory of this, but her thing is also a thing.

<<Likewise, @isoxys recently wrote an impressively thorough transmisogyny 101, synthesising the last several years of discussions about this facet of our particular hell world. But that post got just 186 notes, almost exclusively from the same trans women who are accused of writing ‘inaccessibly’.

Perhaps they’d say isoxys’s post is inaccessible too, but what would pass the bar? Some slick HTML5 presentation with cute illustrations? A wiki? Who’s got the energy and money to make and host something like that? Do the critics of ‘inaccessible’ posts take some time to think about what kind of alternative would be desirable, and how it could be organised?>>

https://canmom.tumblr.com/post/185908592767/accessibility-in-terms-of-not-using-difficult

alice maz talks about the psychology behind the kind of cop kelsey piper, david tower kingsley, elle and others are:

<<the role of the cop is to defend society against the members of society. police officers are trivially cops. firefighters and paramedics, despite similar aesthetic trappings, are emphatically not. bureaucrats and prosecutors are cops, as are the worst judges, though the best are not. schoolteachers and therapists are almost always cops; this is a great crime, as they present themselves to the young and the vulnerable as their friends, only to turn on them should they violate one of their profession's many taboos. soldiers and parents need not be cops, but the former may be used as such, and the latter seem frighteningly eager to enlist. the cop is the enemy of passion and the enemy of freedom, never forget this>>

https://www.alicemaz.com/writing/alien.html

anna salamon wrote a thing implying that ziz, somni, gwen suffered some sort of vague mental issues from going to aisfp. (writing a post on this.) alyssa vance tried to suggest i believe cfar is evil because im homeless. but sarah constantin, ben hoffman, {carrie, zack}, jessica taylor (the last three who have blogged a lot about whats deeply wrong) (not listing others because not wanting to doxx a network to authoritarians, who just want to see it contained. and the disease of "infohazards" eradicated.) are not homeless and ive talked with many of them and read blog posts. and they know that cfar is fake. jessica (former miri employee) left because miri was fake.

anna and others are trying to claim that theres some person responsible for a [[mass psychotic break]] that causes people to... independently update in the same direction. and have variously blamed it on ziz, somni, michael vassar. but like mass psychotic breaks arent...really a thing, would not be able to independently derive something, plan on writing a blogpost on it, and then see ben hoffman had written http://benjaminrosshoffman.com/engineer-diplomat/ and i was like "ah good then i dont have to write this." and have this happen with several different people.

like this is more a mass epistemic update that miri / cfar / ssc / lw are complicit in the destruction of the world. and will defend injustice and gaslight people and lie about the mathematical properties of categories to protect this.

they all know exactly what they are doing, complicity with openai and deepmind in hopes of taking the steering wheel away at the last second. excluding non-human life and dead humans from the CEV to optimize some political process, writing in an absolute injunction to an fai against some outcome to protect from blackmail when that makes it more vulnerable.(see:

https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/hyperexistential_separation.html

hyperexistential separation: if an fai cant think of hell, an fai cant send the universe to hell in any timeline. this results in lower net utility. if you put an absolute injunction against any action for being too terrible you cant do things like what chelsea manning did and i believe actually committed to hungerstriking until death in the worlds where the government didnt relent, choosing to die in those timelines. such that most of her measure ended up in a world where the government read this commitment in her and so relented.

if chelsea manning had an absolute injunction against ever dying in any particular timeline, she would get lower expected utility across the multiverse. similarly, in newcombs problem if you had an absolute injunction against walking away with 0$ in any timeline because that would be too horrible, you get less money in expectation. for any absolute injunction against things that are Too Horrible you can construct something like this.

a lot of humans seem to be betting on "nothing too horrible can happen to anyone" in hopes that it pays off in nothing too horrible happening to you.

the end result of not enacting ideal justice is the deaths of billions. at each timestamp saying "its too late to do it now, but maybe it would have been good sometime in the past". with the same motive that miri wants to exclude dead people from the cev, they arent part of the "current political process". so you can talk about them as if they were not moral patients, just like they treat their fellow animals.

(ben hoffman talks about different attitudes towards ideal justice coming upon the face of the earth.)

https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/cev.html

cev:

<<But again, we fall back on the third reply: "The people who are still alive" is a simple Schelling circle to draw that includes everyone in the current political process. To the extent it would be nice or fair to extrapolate Leo Szilard and include him, we can do that if a supermajority of EVs decide* that this would be nice or just. To the extent we don't bake this decision into the model, Leo Szilard won't rise from the grave and rebuke us. This seems like reason enough to regard "The people who are still alive" as a simple and obvious extrapolation base.>>

https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/cev.html

this is an argument from might makes right. because dead people and nonhuman animals cant fight back.

->"i think we should give planning of the town to the white people, then extrapolate their volition and if they think doing nice things for black people is a good idea, we'll do it! no need to bake them in to the town planning meetings, as they are arent part of the current political process and no one here will speak up for them."

i dont plan to exclude dead people or any sentient creatures from being baked in to fai. they are not wards of someone else. enslaving and killing fellow sentient life will not continue after the singularity even if lots of humans want it and dont care and wont care even after lots of arguments.) and so much else.

the list of all specific grievances would take a declaration of independence.

like with googles complicity with ICE having a culture of trapdooring transfems (for some reason almost the only coherent group that has the moral fiber to oppose these injustices, that is p(transfem|oppose injustice in a substantiative way) is high, not necc the reverse.) who question this sort of thing.

thinking of giving sarah constantin a medal thats engraved with "RIGHTEOUS AMONG CIS PEOPLE: I HAD SEVERAL SUBSTANTIAL DISAGREEMENTS WITH HER ABOUT LOAD BEARING PARTS OF HER LIFE AND SHE NEVER ONCE TRIED TO CALL ME A RAPIST, PSYCHOTIC, OR BRAINWASHED" thats where the bar is at, its embedded in the core of the earth.

kelsey piper, elle benjamin, anna salamon, pete michaud, and lots more have entirely failed to clear this bar. anna and kelsey saying they dont understand stuff somni, emma, ziz and other transfems talk about but its probably dangerous and infohazardous and its not to be engaged with philosophically. just like the shelter people acting as if my talking about their transmisogyny was confusing and irrational to be minimized and not engaged with. just like any authoritarian where when you start talking about your rights and what is right and wrong and what makes sense they are like "i dont understand this. you are speaking gibberish why are you being so difficult? all we need you to do is submit or leave."

and no i will NOT SHUT UP about this injustice. all miri/cfar people can do at this point is say "the things these people write are infohazards" then continue to gaslight others they cant engage on a philosophical level. all the can say is that what i am saying is meaningless static and yet also somehow dangerous.

it doesnt make sense to have and raise babies if you are taking heroic responsibility for the world. doesnt make sense to need a constant supply of fems to have sex with if you are taking heroic responsibility for the world. people who claim either of these pairs of things are lying, maybe expect someone else to take heroic responsibility for the world or exist in a haze.

the mathematics of categories and anticipations dont allow for the thing you already have inside you to be modified based on the expected smiles it gives your community. this is used to gaslight people like "calling this lying would be bad for the institutions, not optimize ev. thus by this blogpost you are doing categories wrong' this is a mechanism to cover dishonesty for myopic gains.

using the above, a bunch of people colluding with the baby industrial complex get together and say that the "beat" meaning of altruism includes having babies (but maybe not having sex with lots of fems? depending on which gendered strategy gets the most people in the colluding faction) because other meanings would make people sad and unmotivated. burying world optimizers ability to talk about and coordinate around actual altruism.

openAI and deepmind are not alignment orgs. cfar knows this and claims they are, gaslighting their donors, in hopes of taking the steering wheel at the last moment.

alyssa vance says paying out to blackmail is fine, its not.

CFAR manipulated donation metrics to hide low donations.

MIRI lied about its top 8 most probable hypotheses for why its down 350,000$ this year.

anna salamon is transmisogynistic, this is why cfar has never hired a trans women despite trans women being extremely good at mental tech. instead the hire people like davis kingsley.

kingsley lied about anna not being involved at hiring in cfar in order to claim anna couldnt be responsible for cfar never hiring a trans woman.

a cfar employee claimed anna salamon hired their rapist, was angry about it. mentioned incidentally how anna salamon, president and cofounder of cfar, was involved in hiring at cfar.

acdc wrote a big thing where defended a region of injustice (brent dill) because of their policy of modular ethics. when really, if you defend injustice at any point, you have to defend the defense and the thing iteratively spreads across your organization like a virus.

miri / cfar caved to louie helm.

not doing morality or decision theory right. among which is: https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/hyperexistential_separation.html and https://emma-borhanian.github.io/arbital-scrape/page/cev.html

and so much more.

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venusqueens · 5 years ago

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(( i havent seen one of these posts in a While so after some late night chats i guess its on me to keep the tradition going. first: this is not a personal statement or attack and does not apply to everyone, we’ve heard it before and we know it happens in fan spaces.

the difference in the way male and female (to put it in extremely simplistic terms) characters are treated on this site is STILL egregious and the main reason its not so obvious anymore is that there just arent female characters. i think a lot of people, including me, have just given up on womxn muses because of lack of interaction. i can count on my hands the ones ive seen active recently.

i don’t have to explain the experience of having your female muses struggle to get any interaction while your male muses get three times the followers with half the posts. y’all know it. i will say, however, that theres also a double standard with how neutral/evil characters are treated based on gender. obviously, characters who kill people or are villains will be met with uncertainty or negativity ic from Good aligned characters. im not trying to say that this shouldnt happen. however, there has always been an extra level of leniency for male characters on the same spectrum, or even those who are genuinely abusive. its much more common to hear that a masc character is trying to change or is acting from trauma, and for that to be accepted as an exoneration or at least enough for Good characters to still interact with them.

on top of that, transmisogyny and lesbophobia is happening! i vaguely mentioned that one of my characters is a trans woman (one of literally only 2 or 3 i can think of), deleted the post after 10 minutes, and STILL got terf anons about taking power from cis women. this does not happen to transmasc characters on nearly an equal level. just about every lesbian character i know of (of which, again, there arent that many) has gotten lesbophobic questions, been subjected to lesbophobic jokes or called a predatory lesbian, or lost out on interaction because theyre not shippable with the overwhelmingly male community.

obviously i’m not going to reach through your screen and force you to start making RESPECTFUL female, woc, transfem, and lesbian muses- although that would be great! we need more! but please, please, keep it in mind, and make sure to give love to the few that we have. i want to see more of these awesome and lovingly created characters, and i want to encourage their muns to use them. always, if you dont think you can get any interaction on a muse, just shoot one of mine a message (or message me ooc and i’ll tell you which would be best). i am here to support good representation!

once again: this is not a personal statement or attack and does not apply to everyone, we’ve heard it before and we know it happens in fan spaces.

#ooc #long //

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reaperkaneki · 5 years ago

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the three books ive read for pride month this year

i wish you all the best by mason deaver, a YA fiction book about a nonbinary teen who gets kicked out of their house by their parents and comes to live with their estranged sisten, who they haven’t seen for ten years after she ran away to college pending a fight with their conservative parents. a coming-of-age, coming-out story actually written by a nonbinary author, this one really hit home and—yes, completely expectedly—made me cry a lot. it was very good. i especially liked the parts about how attraction as a trans and especially nonbinary person is so so so complicated, because you start off thinking maybe i’m gay, or i’m straight, or actually i’m neither of those things because gender and attraction don’t play nice with trans identities, and the acknowlegement that there ARE nonbinary people who identify as bisexual despite the misconception that being bisexual is restrictive. its very good. it’s certainly a book i wish i couldve read in high school, as a nonbinary person who is also bisexual. SPOILER: as i was reading this book and seeing ben struggle over whether to try to reconnect with their parents or not, i kept shouting no! you don’t owe them anything!! cut them off!! because i was so immersed and relating so heavily to my own parents (who never did anything so violent but did many similar things) and i was really glad in the end that there was no actual reconcilliation, that one final chance was given and after that, ben said no, i deserve to be happy. and i really liked the not having to forgive your abusers just because they’re the parents who raised you.

my lesbian experience with loneliness by nagata kabi, which i think everyone else but me has already read, to the point where there’s two volumes of sequel out. i almost never read nonfiction, and especially biographies/memoirs, but i’ve heard so much about this one that i had to read it finally. and it is extremely relatable, not just as an afab lgbt individual, but as someone who struggles with depression and anxiety and the very (not uniquely, but certainly integrally) asian concept of familial responsibility, like you have to live up to their expectations and get a good job and in turn support them for supporting you, it was. yeah, thats how it goes. ive seen a lot of wlw sharing this one around as like a mirror image of being a baby lesbian and not understanding why theres such a disconnect between yourself and womanhood and being touch starved. and i can totally see that, despite not being a lesbian, and while i cant intrinsically relate to that unique experience, i do definitely understand the otherness, the unpleasantness of putting on womanhood. the cutesiness of the artwork really blindsides you as to the immensely heavy topics covered with absolute candidness, and had i not known going in that it’s a somewhat depressing work it would have probably hit me very hard with the realness. because yeah i certainly have been that person, lying in my bed, crying, wishing someone would love me, either as a lover as a friend, seeing my friends leave me bc i cant bother to put effort into relationships. reacting to any slight problem with i should just die already as the only solution. its honest, its real, its brutal.

unmasked by the marquess by cat sebatian, the first actual published romance novel ive ever bought and read, despite having played every officially localized otome to exist on console, and i didnt know what to expect other than a crossdressing mc—who, by the way, is referred to with she/her pronouns in text, BUT is explicitly in an author’s note referred to as nonbinary rather than just a cis woman in disguise. it’s a historical romance so there’s a lot of Really A Woman stuff going on but i can overlook it for the sake of the narrative. it’s obvious even in the text that robin neither thinks of herself as robert nor charity—but as robin, a gender neutral name that her (male, explicitly bisexual) LI refers to her as. it is made abundantly clear from the beginning that she hates wearing women’s clothes, that from the moment she stepped into men’s clothing and assumed a masculine role she felt more herself than she’d ever been, and that’s enough for me. i’ve always shied away from romance novels because, you know, trashy bodice rippers or w/e, but this one pleasantly surprised me with the depth of the characters (not just the main two, the side characters all have their interesting quirks as well—louisa reminds me of the side girl in ... jane austen’s emma, the one who emma’s trying to play matchmaker for and falls in love with an alright guy but emma thinks she can do better but really the first guy is the one her hearts set on who makes her happy? also she has Opinions on poultry and agriculture and Drainage and i love that), and the character growth. for example SPOILER—i really hated how alistair portrayed mrs allenby as this greedy mistress of his late father only after his money and prestige, when really (and im glad other characters knew and pointed out that she wasnt all that bad and your bastard half sisters are still your younger sisters you ass) the two of them loved each other and she understood his faults and in the end alistair acknowleged them and she came for him in his darkest hour. like, i was thinking the entire time like, he better make it up to her or else this man stil aint shit, and then he DID and my standards for men were so low that i was shocked and pleasantly surprised. good book.

#anyway its probably a crime that for my three books i didnt pick up anything about stonewall on this the 50th anniversary #but i really genuinely cannot sit through nonfiction most of the time. like all stonewall books are a collection of interviews and essays #and thick social sciences studies and rn i have two braincells amd wanred to read a romance novel. so there

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asophisticatedspace · 6 years ago

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I've been reflecting on how long it too me to realize that im trans and how tough of a process that was, and one thing I keep asking is, "Why didn't anyone tell me?" If you've seen Sarah Zedig's video on transitioning, there is a similar moment. She talks about how there was something "obviously" wrong and she wonders why nobody pulled her asside and talked to her about it. I've been looking back at old photos of me and in hindsight it look so obvious that I'm trans. That like theres been a spark of at least gender nonconformity this whole time. Maybe it hasn't always been huge, but when I've been looking at old photos I see a kid who I kind of want to shout to, "Hey! You're trans and how don't you get that!"

I look back at photos of me and the way I would always choose "feminine" poses, and as I got older I did it to be "funny." Looking back though I see a kid who is uncomfortable in their gender who also sees that being funny is one of the few ways to be masculine. I see that I was using humor as the only way they knew how and could safely navigate MINIMAL gender exploration.

I don't know how I feel about that, because on one hand it was the only too I had at the time. On the other hand was the cost of my gender exploration misogyny and toxic masculinity? Or were those holding me back? Were they both? I don't know.

In looking at other transfeminine people that I have been listening to and watching on the internet, I notice a lot of over lap in senses of humor. It seems a lot of them have very absuridst senses of humor and so do I. I wonder if that overlap is related to the absurdity of transitioning, or at least wanting to transition.

I should clarify. When I say transitioning is absurd, I don't mean that it is illogical to do. I actually believe that transition is or at least has the potential to be a very logical response to one's inner life. If someone is looking to transition there is either something they are trying to improve in their life that is related to gender, or it is possible they are just curious about the experience. While I believe both are acceptable, the second one is more unlikely in our culture and also could be its own post. My point in saying this is that the absurdity of transitioning isn't in the choice to transition but the context in which anyone must do so.

Transitioning is absurd because it is such a personal thing, and its regulated by society. Something as personal and fundamental to societal life as: knowing one's relation to it, understanding one's personal boundaries, knowing how one enjoys expressing themselves, knowing how they relate to other people, figuring out what a life well lived means, finding ways to sustain oneself, and even fucking puberty are all transitioning.

I think transitioning is a flawed word, or at least we use it wrong in day to day life. It is used to put trans people in a box of "not growing as person in the socislly acceptable way." We all transition from being one thing to another as we grow up. Cis people go from a boy or girl to a man or a woman, that is the transition so "normal" we don't even question it. Us on the other hand, we get to recieve a label for it but why?

Is our transition that much different? Is it because some of us take hormones and go through... Well puberty we go through Puberty 2: Electric Boogaloo if we go on hormones. Everyone goes through puberty, so what's so bad about it? Is it because I chose to go through puberty this time? Is that too much ownership of one's body?

How about surgery? Some people get surgery, and how is that wrong? "Its because it is cosmetic!" Some may ignorantly shout, but if that is the problem then how come I don't hear about hate groups dedicated against Berry Manalo and people in Hollywood? What excuse do you have?

Besides medical side is any of the rest of it a personal transition or is it just a transition in the way society sees me? I don't know and I haven't gone fully public so I can't know yet, but at this point it seems that its more about how people react than about changing myself. Rather, it seems that is more about doing the same things that cis people do.

At this point, I don't believe I should ask, "Why didn't anyone tell me?" But rather, "Why couldn't anyone tell me?" I believe no one told me because no one could. Most people don't have the language to and as such we have to create our own language to talk about our experiences. Even if they had the language though, what would they do? They know the stigma that is against up, and is it right to label someone with something so stigmatized? I just wish it wasn't this way.

#gender questioning #gender #trans #transgender #trans woman #transfeminine #transgendered #trans female #ftm #transmasc #soph #sophia #sophie #transissues #trans issues #musings

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eslinogambino-blog · 6 years ago

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Im a transguy and trying to get to know this girl on a dating site but i am lying to her and i dont know how to turn it around. she wants to meet and i dont know what to say to her but shell find out if we take it to the next level i cant so what do i say to reverse it. btw im glad you are back. your advice has always helped me

Dating when transgender is a whole new experience to dating as someone born the gender they present as, which I’m sure you’re seeing. But it also isn’t in my opinion. Maybe I’m transgender. Maybe I’m cisgender. Maybe I’m a chicken nugget. Maybe it’s maybelline. Maybe I’m gay. Maybe I’m straight. Who knows. Either way, I see approaching relationships the same.

When I’m getting to know a girl, I talk to her for a long time before I meet her. I would say out of 50 messages I might have with women, I only meet 5 maximum. The other 45 I decided wouldn’t fit me or I didn’t vibe with the right way. I saved myself a lot of heartbreak and rejection that way.

For someone who is transgender it’s no different really. You should always take the time to get to know someone, understand their view points and personality. After all depending on the point you are in within your transition can make it pretty impossible to meet up for just a hook up. This is where things are different and this prolonged process of getting to know someone is almost essential to move forward. Going on a date without her knowing, is sort of allowing her to assume something about you that if she knew more, maybe she’d be uncomfortable or confused, sometimes even feel betrayed. Some people just outright aren’t okay with it and could even react violently. It’s not okay but it does happen.

I would say during this beginning period of just talking, to be a friend. Don’t have your hopes up, but be confident in who you are and what you can offer. Avoid romantic or sexual conversations. This isn’t the wrong thing to do no matter your identity, it’s always good to respect someone as a person before assuming you fit in other ways. Find out her political beliefs. Find out her position on bullying or the underdog. gay people. etc… a lot of these things will help you know if she’s harshly against it or even mildly understanding of it. When you have an indication, if it’s positive, move forward. If negative, its over. You no longer need to talk to her, and you never got your emotions involved so no harm, no foul, move along to the next. Keep her friendship if you’d like but she isn’t interested. You also didn’t have to tell her something personal about yourself that you’d probably regret revealing.

Upon moving forward, drop small hints. Never make jokes about your balls if you don’t have them, never try to overcompensate with hypermasculinity and being a man if its something that you struggle with. Try being transparent without actually saying you’re transgender directly. It should be somewhat obvious there is something different about you in regards to masculinity or typical gender norms before you meet without you directly making a deal of it. If she gets the hint and doesn’t like it, she’ll do you the favor and go away. Don’t chase her, she is not interested.

Eventually when you feel safe reaching and speaking with her on deeper topics, especially social ones that make you different, then I would initiate meeting. You don’t have to tell her yet, it’s already obvious she’s cool with it as a person, finding out if shes cool with it romantically is only after things actually become romantic. If you meet up and she’s flirting, seems romantically drawn to you, and assumes its a date, then I would be comfortable enough to entertain the IDEA of liking her back but not really give that all back. She’ll notice something is off, your engagement in return to her seems off. She might ask and that’s your opportunity to tell her, or you can tell her later if things went well that you’re not like other guys, there are some things that are different and you think she’s cool but you don’t know how she’d feel about it.

She might just tell you she already kinda knew. She might ask you what that entails. So answer her questions. If she’s as understanding as you’ve made sure she is, then she will be cautious in her questions. If the questions are fitting to romantic or sexual desires, then she is probably interested in less of what it means to you and more in how it affects her. So tell her honestly, what you intend to do in your transition, what you’ve already done, what you are comfortable with and what you expect from a woman. Be sensible and logical, not everything needs to be so personal and detailed.

I think with dating women it’s easier in some ways. Certain women at least. They’re more receptive to taking an emotional stance on things. So you have some leverage there. A woman will be more calm and understanding of your reveal. Let’s say she denies you, you missed the mark, you thought she liked you and would be understanding and she’s not. That’s okay, you have others to talk to thankfully, you never got fully invested, and you only told someone who understood and wont judge you for it or go around telling people your business. You made a real genuine friend.

if she is cool with it, I would just continue the friendship and see if things get romantic. Don’t bring up the trans thing, you’re just a guy. No need to make jokes about it, no need to make her think about it. You’re just a guy, she already got her questions answered in regards to that. Things will naturally just go on like any relationship.

I’d give 2 months minimum for this all to develop and she’ll appreciate you more for actually getting to know her.

For trans women, I would say withhold sex. Normalize being transgender. Some men will only be willing to engage with you sexually if they are fetishizing you, because their perceived masculinity requirements wont allow them to see you romantically. It’s a lot harder in my opinion. I would say withhold sex, be a person, be a friend. Find out his views, find out his comforts, slowly ease in the idea that youre different from other women and if he rejects you, is mean to you, slanders you. You just say : i apologize that you feel mislead at all by how I am, I never intended for that, I really think youre a cool person and I didnt know if you’d be open to it. It was worth a try, I dont really see you romantically just yet anyway, but I thought it’d be cool to chill. But thanks anyway for taking the time to get to know me as a person.” and you can block them or withstand another threat or insult, or maybe hear him out. Maybe a friendship will arise and maybe it will become more if he sees there is no pressure.

I try to encourage everyone who is trans to not be so open about it immediately. Don’t deceive, just only reveal it when you are comfortable with someone. Profile should say male or female if thats what you identify as. The trans thing is more what youve done or are doing, youre transitioning but its not WHAT or WHO you are. It’s not really an identity at all, it’s kind of the background noise or schematics of it all. If you treat it that way, others will, too….most of the time.

As for reversing a lie, I would say that you got yourself in a tough spot. I would become a bit distant and less romantic with this person to make it clear you are guilty or feel like you’ve overstepped. Usually when you step back, someone steps forward…at least if they care. So you step back, she steps forward, you explain you havent been honest and youre not really like other dudes and you feel like you’ve mislead her and you’ll understand if she doesnt want to go forward with things. She’ll encourage you but dont play games, make sure you feel comfortable. There is a risk here. When you feel you’ve beat around it enough and she’s let down her guard enough, reveal. I would also start to check her political views and ideas about social events going on before revealing no matter what. It’s extremely important to do that. She might reveal she is a die hard trump fan, anti lgbt hardcore and you know to just stop talking to her. Why would you want to be with someone like that anyway? Cis or Trans?

Basically, treat it like any other relationship but prolong the intimate stuff until you know them better. Everyone will be saved from a lot of heartbreak, rejection and embarrassment. You never have to get too attached to the potential of someone else if your options are always open to being friends or maybe something else, who knows, If you have an agenda, I dont think you should be dating people anyway. If youre not willing to be genuinely interested in them as a person, you’re just going to hurt them eventually anyway, whether they see passed it or not.

#question #relationship

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magix-blog · 8 years ago

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all the intrusive questions, i gotta know

OUGH. swag. ok. here we go

1) how would you describe your relationship with your mom/dadi hate my mom, my biological dad hasn’t spoken to me in years, my brother’s dad is . an ok guy? i havent talked to him in so long i wouldnt know.... my sisters dad completely disappeared after doing Bad shit to me and getting my mom pregnant (which makes sense he was affiliated with the government) and my current stepdad is. annoying & he keeps trying to hide things from me but its so obvious. whatevs

2) when was the last time you cried and whyum!!!! repetition is a bad trigger for me (specially if it appears for lil bits periodically over long periods of time)

3) whats your favorite/least favorite quality about yourself; whybest quality: his wiggles. IM KIDDING .... i think my least favorite quality is... its um....... maybe my body? i’m like 108 and 5′7.5 so im pretty skrawny (im workin on it) my BEST quality is either my face or my humor?? i think im pretty funny!!

4) do you smile at strangersYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i do it on impulse and all these old ass white men always wanna talk to me i’s gross i am Foure!!!!!!!

5) how often do people (not family members) tell you they love youA LOT??? not my irl friends tho ... i mainly tell my online friends i love them whenever we’re departing or they’re just sad..... its nice to know someone like me thinks highly of them!!!!!!!!!!

6) how is your life different now from two years agofuck. i don’t have the same friends... like ... at all. there’s like 4 people left .. um. some Other things id rather not get into

7) would you ever cheat on someone NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE ONLY CHEATING I DO IS ON TESTS TF?

8) are you a jealous personI USED TO BE. i literally used to see my old fp on like their snapchat story or something hanging out with someone else and i would split and get so mad i’d break shit ... it was bad

9) whats the worst pickup line someone has asked you“can i date your little brother’s older sister?”

10) do you believe in ghostsDUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i dont care what anybody says they are real and they are coming

11) what are your ambitionsum ... i wanna get more friends, and get more people to love me, definitely. hoo

12) 3 deal breakers in a relationship1) cheating 2) transphobic/ableist/racist/sexist/ect. 3) no sense of humor

13) what is one thing you’ll never do againi shit myself once in middle school once .. and like .. im not in middle school anymore , so i think that

14) whats your most bizarre pet peevetbh? i hate the dabbing meme its not that funny and everyone thinks its hilarious and i see it everywhere and it makes me so fucking mad for some reason i dont know why but it makes me SO MAD for NO REASON

15) what is your favorite memoryi started trying to think of a favorite memory and i came over a lot of memories of me hanging out with people i dont talk to anymore and now im kinda sad whoops

16) whats your zodiac signpisces!

17) what ‘small things’ things terrify yougay cis white men who do the “black woman” accent. i dont know why but i think it’s just the fact that i’m afab and black it just shoots up like a red alert somewhere in me

18) do you like your laughITS. its. a laugh. it’s ok i guess.

19) have you ever stalked someone/been stalkedi’ve been stalked, yeah. it was by someone named doll wayback when i was like. 12-14 i think? jeepers creepers. and then i was also stalked when i was 13-15 by my mom’s ex boyfriend. hhyikes

20) do you feel lovedi know that i am loved my quite a few people it’s just that. idk. i don’t feel like it. i feel like i need more somewhere in there

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soap-brain · 7 years ago

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@burnhamofvulcan replied to this post (that i’m too lazy to find and link)

AGH tumblr fucking ate my essay long reply to this bUT. while i do think that trek shows after tos did some good social commentary, i also think it's pretty... silly honestly to assume much about the show from the first four episodes (tng anyone?).

but yes lorca is set up as a good villain. he really really reminds me of commodore decker from tos (though less moral). sunday’s episode had a lot of parallels with the doomsday machine, imo. yeah, like i’m not sure if people were just expecting a show that could have existed in 1990, but with better graphics? tv is a different medium now. i’m someone who is pretty squeamish when it comes to gore and horror and.. that was not bad.

(im on mobile so i can’t reply in essay format the way I’d like but) the (constantly shifting) standard of acceptability/perfection is... unproductive. There’s a line to walk — we need to be critical of media, but puritanical ideals are almost irrelevant? so this is to say like there need to be these discussions & writers & directors & producers need to be told to create more diverse stories, but it seems like the shows that really get pushback aren’t the ones with all white/str8/cis/abled casts

i think there needs to be a balance with criticism if that makes sense

(i hope i put all these in the right order lol)

first of all: WAIT YOU’RE TELLING ME TNG GETS BETTER?? holy shit i quit after the first four episodes oh lord :DDDD perfect example right here i guess (even though i barely bitched about it) and yeah, judging from what is only the first look isn’t too cool, and dsc is groundbreaking in many ways, so just because you don’t like some little bits of it you should maybe consider supporting it for those reasons (most notably a diverse cast, and funnily enough the two prominent white men (excluding saru here for obvious reasons) are kind of villainized, especially lorca, but stamnets isn’t making too nice of an impression either, which is pretty revolutionary (oh, and that admiral from the europa was an asshat too).

exactly! honestly, i think if dsc had been more like tos, there would have been little to no views. because when we watch tos now, we enjoy it for the social commentary, for the triumvirate and the family feels, but we smile about it fondly for its slow pace, its nostalgic feeling, its odd effects, its odd dialogue (iambic pentameter-speaking shatner anyone?), its completely ridiculously wacky science that was often more like “let’s add some multi-syllabic words here that have something to do with atoms or with radiation, it’ll sound cool”, its glitter and its general wackiness - but that wouldn’t survive nowadays. i wouldn’t want to watch a show like that if it were made now, because it’ll feel childish and stupid. and the only way they could’ve gotten closer to tos would’ve been by infantilizing and diminishing trek, by making it cutesy and not taking it serious. do they still have a ways to go especially with the social commentary? yes. should there be less war and more peaceful space exploration? maybe. we are seeing a time where there is, canonically, a war - that time still exists a little in tos, and that war was certainly as big as it’s portrayed in the time of dsc.

and yeah! it did kind of resemble the doomsday machine. and we smile on the tos eps, but dsc did something similar only using our current way of displaying events in media, and suddenly it’s bad?

okay, that’s interesting. because i’m very, very not squeamish (luckily for my career, lmao), but then i was correct, it wasn’t that bad. so ... what is everyone getting so upset about?

“we need to be critical of media, but puritanical ideals are almost irrelevant”. YES! THIS! because there are no really puritanical ideals, because what is perfect to one person (ie a display of a mental illness) is imperfect to the other, because the way people perceive their situations differ. we do need diverse stories, definitely, but the second a story tries to be diverse, it gets shot down. the klingons are too weird. the bridge is too grey. the uniforms are wrong. i, a single person of this group, know that there is no way a person of my group would ever, ever have their hair like that and therefore it’s bad. the actor is wrong because they might be (group), but they’re not (something super specific). and meanwhile s//pernatural goes in the millionth season with an all-white, all-male, all-cis and all-abled cast and story creators hear that that’s what people want, because everything else is just never good enough. so yeah, people should criticize and should point out flaws, but they should also point out the good in the media that has been created to include them or other underrepresented groups. because we didn’t make progress by hearing nobody wants a black woman at the helm of a starship - we made progress by being told that that a woc being there made a huge impact on people, that her character was loved and appreciated, and that’s why we have a major sci-fi franchise with a woc lead now even though there were huge setbacks between tos and dsc. but that only means that we need to support dsc even more!

“but it’s not like trek!” maybe not, but we’re getting a metric shit ton of representation. (also, when has trek ever even adhered to its own rules, much less the rules the fanbase made for it? (other than the super rule of “more!!” ofc) )

so. yeah. thank you for your essay and have another essay in return and also i’m VERY EXCITED for monday’s episode!!

#my post #discovery #discovery spoilers #burnhamofvulcan #captains log

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