#i get it senior year sucks
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I'm not so far removed from undergrad life to get mad at the flaky schedule of a senior,
but 🙄 undergrads
#academic jerky#I've been given minions#and not just other grad student minions... ug minions too. useful only if you know where to use them#otherwise something WILL catch fire and that's me speaking as a former ug minion#i get it senior year sucks#but that's why you need to be careful about officially committing to things bc that's your first impression baby!#you gotta be careful!#maybe i looked like a scrungy bastard but i kept to my time committments
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no thought only MQF in brain* (*even more than usual yeah.....)
ok lads listen up. i love allllll Mu Qingfang designs ok? all the interpretations are cool and valid and dear ok BUT. whenever I personally try to draw MQF without a 'stache he just looks to me like a first-year med student ok hjdfhkfd
but anyway. when i was scrolling around and being completely normal about MQF i saw a lot of ppl say stuff like 'this is my 'mqf is actually pretty' agenda' and its alwaysss about peeled mqf SO I HAVE A POINT TO PROVE OK. mqf with a moustache can be also a prettyboy ok?? i can prove it 😭😭
so here are my qingfangs where i turned up the babygirl vibes to absolute max as i could hsdfjkhdskfh 💜
#mu qingfang#svsss#listen.......actually nevermind hfdjkhfk#im having. thoughts#hsjkdhkf#maybe ill also make a text post some time later because i cannot shut up im having lack of fics issues hjdfhfk#so anyway 🥰 hjkfh silly litol weary doctor amirite-#also some may have noticed that i have finally used the correct peak seniority for MQF aha well#(through gritted teeth) i have finally come to terms with the fact he is 8th its fine its whatever i like 8 anyway#it fits anyway of course the doctor peak is underappreciated smh smh smh smh#also btw if youve ever been influenced by my mqf design i have to let you know each and every time that happens i gain 5 billion years hjfd#<333333333#it makes me soooooooo giddy that ppl like him enough that i change their perception of him lmao jdfhkd#nothing gives me more power points than when the moustache propaganda claims another victim FR HAGHJKFD#so yeah 🥰🥰#wait also gotta mention that im not like bashing any other designs i want to make that super clear#i suck at tones i dont want this to get misinterpreted#all mqf good mqf 💕💕
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thinking about a no upside down au steddie fic where steve and eddie run into each other years after moving away from hawkins, and eddie remembers steve and his fall from grace as king, and is kind of intrigued to see what kind of person he is now
and steve doesn’t remember him at all at first, because, look, eddie changed his hair again, and steve’s had a few head injuries (no upside down but i imagine he still went thru some shit with the party and with robin), and he didn’t really think about eddie in high school anyway, and he’s trying to forget about hawkins as much as possible (besides the kiddos, but they’re all moved out for college now, anyway) (obviously he lives with robin)
but steve is different now, happier, more open, flirts with guys, flirts with EDDIE, and eddie….. well, he wants to know more! and he tells steve he knows him from hawkins, and steve’s sunny little smile flickers a little, but he just apologizes for not remembering him and mentions he has some memory problems
and they get to know each other, and eventually as eddie tells him more (and maybe with the help of some yearbooks) steve remembers eddie. and. well. they like getting to know each other. and they like each other. and then they get together
eventually they’ve been together for a while, and eddie thinks he wants to maybe introduce steve to wayne, and he mentions he’s going to go back to hawkins for a long weekend (as he’s done a couple times) and this time he’d like steve to join him
and again steve’s sunny smile flickers a bit, but he says he’d love to meet eddie’s uncle, and… they go to hawkins. and it goes well— meeting wayne, at least, but steve seems a little on edge the whole time they’re there, tense when they drive in, fidgety when they go to the grocery store, et cetera. eddie thinks maybe steve is nervous about staying with the man who raised eddie, which is ridiculous, because wayne LOVES steve.
it’s not til they leave the town altogether that steve relaxes, and eddie realizes it wasn’t “meeting the parents” but rather going back to hawkins. and speaking of meeting the parents, steve didn’t ever bring his own up, even though eddie knew they still lived in hawkins. and the way steve glanced around whenever they went in public, like he was scared of getting recognized
and he asks about it, and steve doesn’t really want to talk about it, but he gives eddie snippets of it. people he wanted to leave behind in hawkins, memories that resurfaced, things he wants to forget
eddie goes back to see wayne sometimes, and the first time he doesn’t know whether to ask steve to come, so he just mentions he’s thinking about going to hawkins for some weekend and steve immediately starts making plans with him as if the invite is implicit. they go back to hawkins several more times, steve still tense and pent up the whole time they’re there
over time steve reveals more and more to eddie. everything that made hawkins hell for him, from the things he himself did in high school to the things people did to him. stuff tommy and carol and billy said to him. some of it is just typical high school bullshit (and oh, the nancy thing.) some of it is the tragedies steve went through, the horrors he had to protect his kids from. the injuries he sustained. more generally the homophobia that permeated the whole town, keeping steve from being himself. the lack of support in the indiana public school system for a high school senior who’s had two concussions and gone through incredible trauma.
his parents. the reason why steve’s mail is addressed to ‘steve buckley’ now, not ‘steve harrington’.
(that doesn’t come out until much, much later, and eddie is kicking himself for ever suggesting steve come back to hawkins.)
eddie, who hardly had an easy time of it in hawkins, is absolutely blown away by what steve had gone through in the same town, right under his nose. the entire persona that steve was trying to leave behind — the cool as a cucumber, unaffected, douchey mask he wore to hide all that he had endured. the head injuries. the emotional tragedies he had gone through. the way he had to be the rock for the kids even as he went through the same things as them.
he tries to tell steve they never have to go back to hawkins again, and steve is having none of it. he tells steve wayne can come visit them in their new city, and steve thinks that’s completely unfair to the man who had raised eddie, seriously, you’re going to make him come all the way up here?
and well i don’t know exactly what the ending is but steve is so stubborn about trying to love hawkins because it was eddie’s home and he wants to be able to go see wayne because wayne deserves to see his kid and eddie deserves to see his uncle and steve doesn’t want to be the problem :(
#steddie#stranger things#this isn’t very fleshed out but just. hawkins as an incredibly scarring place for steve#something built up in his mind as a very dangerous place for him not just because of what happened there but who he had to be there#i think ultimately it would culminate in them going back to hawkins and running into steve’s parents when they least expect it#and steve gets to yell at them in public and tell them they suck and ruin their image and eddie is being his little guard dog next to him#baring his teeth#for the no upside down part of the au i think it would have to be like. nebulous tragedy of season 1 struck them#barb still died (sorry barb) so that his relationship with nancy falls apart. will and el are twins and they disappear the same night#steve knows the kids earlier in the timeline in this one and has already basically adopted them when will and el go missing#eddie was never the victim of a massive witch hunt but jason still harasses him during his third senior year and gets ppl to gang up on him#so he was never like Wanted by all of hawkins and can never return but he sure doesn’t feel welcome there besides w wayne#oh i also think it would be important that one of the trips steve snaps at eddie bc he’s so strung out and immediately regrets it#and takes it as proof that when in hawkins Steve Is A Bad Person and tries to explain this to eddie#eddie meanwhile is trying to convince steve that he’s not a bad person and that he was being mean because he’s completely stressed out#and he wouldn’t be so stressed out if he didn’t make himself come back to hawkins#anyway ultimately. steve realized hawkins is just a place where bad things happened. it is not a place that makes people (including himself)#bad. it’s just. a place. and steve did not grow and change for the better bc he got out of hawkins. he got better bc he put the effort in#god i just. love steve so much and the version of him in my mind is so much better developed than what the duffers are doing
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Best thing about being a Scooby Doo fan: you can meet some of the nicest people with some really cool ideas and hcs, there's such an abiding love for the franchise, which on its own is just AMAZING, such a wealth of content to dive into, and I haven't even gotten into the fan REDESIGNS and aus and-
Worst thing about being a Scooby Doo fan: people irl in public will come up to you with some of the worst Scooby takes ever (Scrappy found dead in Miami, SDMI revolutionized animation, etc.) and you have to restrain yourself from getting into a fistfight with some rando acquaintance/friend-of-a-friend in public ALL THE TIME 💀
#THERES NO WAY THIS ONLY HAPPENS TO ME RIGHT#its constanttttt ughhhh#james gunn i fucking hate you this is all your fault 🗡🗡🗡🗡🗡🗡🗡#not the sdmi stuff but the REST#there should be a jail sentence for scooby crimes i SWEAR#also this one dude today UGHHHHHHHU#ive never even seen him before (apparently hes been in my math class this year?) but with all the seniors gone (save me bc i love a party)#there was like 5 ppl in math today (4 of them good friends of mine) and this dude would NOT let up with the scrappy sucks sdmi is awesome bs#like i was just like no i disagree with you every time he brought it up but like UGH.#i think scrappy got a bad lot and deserves a chance to be the best he can be and sdmi is personally unwatchable to me because of how mean#they are to each other/the relationship drama plots. whats not to get we dont need to keep hashing this#i didn't make it a big thing though bc i didn’t want to start stuff but ugh#the only ppl allowed to make fun of scrappy around me are my besties and even theyre on thin ice so like watch it bub#blah#scooby doo
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a person about to tell me to my face that an 18-year-old dating a 14-year-old is perfectly fine just because age is a number
#whoop whoop#thats the sound of the police#you can all thumbs me down for that#or tell me to get off the internet#or tell me to suck on my fucking pacifier#i dont fucking care!!!!#if i was 18 i could NEVER date a 14 year old#24 dating a 20 year old?? ig. 24 dating a 28 year old?? sure why not. both adults that are able to consent.#18 dating a 14 year old?? 🚔🚔🚔🚔🚔🚓🚓🚓🚓🚨🚨🚨🚨#tryna strike a chord#and its prolly a MINNOORRR!111#sorry senior x freshman/potential middle schooler is WEIRD!!!#that 18 year old is on their way to college#that kid JUST started high school.
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Not me making an au where Ken ACTUALLY died (allegedly) in the original 10/4 but was saved by the kirijo group (to be used as a weapon. allegedly), but then it doesnt turn on so its deemed a defect and is dumoed out in the trash only for him to ACTUALLY wake up, be so overwhelemed by hisnsituation he forcibly locks his memories untila situation that forces those memories back out.
anyway hows your day going ;v
tagging in @n00dl3gal bc yknow. they were there for the whole ride fkdjdjdj
#my art#ken amada#persona 3#not me placing more coherent lore here#for real tag nuts only hfjsjwjjs#oooooh ken my beloved you are going through so much already in base p3 i just made it significantly worse#anyway he couldve survived ikutsuki just sucks and took advantage of the situation and just. lied to mitsuru#the 2nd years find him just after they meet up with shinji while searching for info on fuuka and hes clearly deactivated and out of juice#but they dont really have ANYTHING to bring him back up so they decide thar the next best thing is to bring him home#arguably this was more junpeis idea bc he thinks that getting it up and running would be pretty cool and yukari feeling really bad#makoto is along for the ride he sees an unconcious robot child and hes like sure lets bring him home#Mitsuru and akihiko are. VERY obviously terrified bc they KNOW who that is#if anything it prompts them to reveal about the truth about tartarus a lot earlier than intended bc yukari gets VERY sus at the seniors#anyway none of thisbwas about ken it was just about finding him and yeah homie is just kinda konked out for a bit
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*rocking back and forth in a corner* this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass this too shall pass
#lads I’m in the trenches right now ngl#I’ve got so much fucking work to be done with so little time it’s horrific#like honestly for my english essay I’m not even gonna fucking try anymore I just want to submit it on time I don’t fucking care lmao#fashion is like layers of stress I don’t even want to get into#religion can just suck my cock straight up#art feels like dead weight dragging behind me which sucks because I like art but that class is making me HATE it#anyways yeah I’m so glad this is my last year because I can not fucking do this again#im so stressed I can barely eat lmao#anyways I’m gonna tear my fucking hair out or go live in the woods#senioritis is fucking real PLEASE have better time management than me#I’m gonna melt into the floor#vent
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one of my stupider college regrets was not getting an ipad it sucks having my notes split across 17 different things and not being able to annotate PDFs and use them in class without my stupid laptop in my face but also i love pen and paper soooo much and i saved $500 so it’s fine
#if i go to law school i’ll get one though … or at least some sort of tablet. i’ll die if i can’t annotate legal readings#also sucks that it took me until my senior year of college to realize i had free printing all along in my department#we get charged in the regular libraries and stuff#i spent like $10 my first year JUST on japanese homework
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uh oh local tumblr user had a lot of fun recently and socialized and now the not having fun part of life is making them want to cry because the fun part of life is better
#my post#Local tumblr user will suck it up but is going to cry a little bit about it first#Love adulting by the way. Love how it sounds like life is just going to be more and more work for the next like 40+ years of my life#I know it’s because I have problems visualizing my own future but god damn. These are the years of my life I should be enjoying#And I am. I’ve had real good times#But also like why does it sound like these are the good years and it only gets more serious from here#Don’t take me serious I’m just having a hashtag senior year moment I had this in high school too#God my parents once asked what they did that made both of their kids so scared of being a grownup and I don’t know#Maybe being a grownup is just really scary and I’m scared of failing#Tumblr tags baby the perfect place to ramble#// complaining
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It's getting to the point where instead of being encouraged, I just get pissed when people tell me their friends' success stories with getting jobs as software devs without formal education.
Everyone is like "oh yeah my friend did it without a degree, you can too!" And I'm like ok how did they get past the auto rejectors that won't even look at you if you don't have a degree? How good were they before they were hired, and who supported them while they educated themselves? Or who agreed to take them under the wing and give them a chance even though they were green?
I know people are trying to be encouraging but it's starting to feel less like "I believe you can do it" and more like "if you haven't done it yet, what's wrong with you?" They'll be like "you don't need a degree to succeed, just a willingness to learn" and I'm like, I know that as well as anyone, but to the people responsible for making budget decisions, I'm too much of a risk. What do I have to show for myself to them?
Like at the end of the day it just feels like either these folks were super lucky or I'm super unlucky and either way, hearing their stories doesn't usually help or encourage me. I'm fighting an uphill battle here trying to convince folks who think we're in an economic downtown, that a US-based junior developer is a good investment. Yuck. If you don't have anything helpful to say then at this point just don't say anything 😭
#I've always done my best learning on the job#and I'm an extremely loyal employee#to a fault definitely#but nobody is hiring junior devs or if they are it's ALWAYS offshore#I'm busting my ass trying to learn enough to make myself look like the viable candidate I think i probably am#but I'm trying to learn around a full time job and I'm the sole breadwinner and have been for years#which is fine! i don't mind! but it does make it hard to progress in something so brain-intensive when 40hrs per week is eaten by my job#and it's just a really bad time to be looking for work as a developer#idk anything about the economy but whether or not we're in an economic downturn. execs think we are#and their opinion is in some situations more influential than actual truth. this is one of those situations#my company keeps saying they're in the best financial spot they've been in since before the pandemic#but the only non senior devs they are hiring are offshore#which sucks bc they used to be really good about hiring for devs internally among people who proved their worth#i missed the last wave of that by about two years#anyway. I'm just frustrated and annoyed#stop telling me your friends' success stories unless you have specific actionable feedback#and even then think twice if you aren't in tech yourself cause i get a lot of weird advice#or unless you're offering to connect me with your friend who can either mentor me or get me a job themselves#I'm tired of hearing about it#'just put yourself out there!' just put yourself out of my earshot
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I LIVE.... BARELY
first day of senior year... the school is overrun by sophomores, I want my graduated friends back :(
Most of my classes were pretty chill, it's just disclosure documents for the next few days (I'll wear off next Wednesday, probably)
I got a textbook for my AP Psych class, so tomorrow I need to pay for a locker and get that figured out.
My AP Bio teacher is awesome, he's new to my school this year but I already LOVE his class; this year is going to be awesome with him (he has a shelf full of MCU action figures, and he quoted Screen Rant in class and I was the only person in any of his classes so far to catch it)
I want to go to sleep, but I also need to finish my room and I want to write, because I haven't gotten the chance too yet. We'll see how that goes lol
#high school#senior year#first day of school#I hate the bus driver though and I don't want to ride it anymore but I don't have a car and my mom's response was to 'suck it up'#so...#either better luck with my dad or I just kind of deal with it for a while until I can get my own car
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pictures of me in my apartment a year ago finishing up my last class for my degree ever sighhh
#🍄.txt#i remember crying so much being so anxious at leaving for college (an hour away mind u) my junior year#< i was also recovering from a very very bad time with my chronic illness and literally any change would trigger symptoms#so 🤫#but it helped me learn so much and i genuinely had so much fun 🧎🏻♀️ especially my senior year#i don’t think i’m ever going to have anything like that again in the future unless i move out which.#the job market? the scary amount of development happening in my city driving up rent to ridiculous prices? like#hmm wonder if i could convince oomf to get a one bedroom and we just slide two twin beds together 😮💨#anyway all this to say. i yam so sad#and also will always slightly mourn the rest of my college experience because of covid taking two years away from me#just a little. sucks it was only like 2.7 full years
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I don't know how much sense this makes but I need a Langelique Cinderella AU, I think it'd work pretty well
#brought to you by:#my last post about angelique's fuck-ass sneakers#& juliet#and juliet#&j#okay but genuinely I think it would work really well#like Angelique is working for lady and daddy cap right#ignore how I called him daddy cap we did Romeo and Juliet for the school play this year and that's what we all called him#and like May and Juliet are the quote unquote evil stepsters#but you know they're not evil they're just like way nicer in comparison to their parents#and like you know the prince holds a ball to find a wife and it's this like whole thing#because lady and daddy cap want Juliet and may to go to like end up with the prince#and like the prince is still Frankie here because maycois is goated let's be real#and like this is kind of where you could either make it centric to a specific ship or you could just do like the whole thing as an au#you could say that like Frankie likes May but when they approach the capulets they're like oh Juliet you want Juliet and it's a whole thing#and you could do jumeo because I don't know maybe Romeo is like you know what Paris was like in the actual Romeo and Juliet play Romeo is#like Paris and the capulets hate him because Lance has kind of like pushing Frankie to be with Romeo but Romeo wants to be with Juliet#and Juliet wants to be with Romeo and blah blah blah but Lance and Angelique specifically comes in where it's like okay but what if Lance i#also looking for a new partner at these balls because you know his wife like died and he needs someone else to share the throne with and#that's why both may and Juliet end up going because their parents don't care about the age difference because their parents suck and they'r#just like you're going to end up with royalty one way or another and you know Angelique is like be safe and actually parenting them and#and warning them and making sure they're prepared to like actually go out to this ball because royalty or not it's still dangerous and#they're both like why don't you just come with us and it's a bit where like maybe April and William play the role of fairy godparents#and you know Angelique is able to go and she meets Lance and they have their little shoe thing and they have the Cinderella ark meanwhile#there's the whole love square with May Frankie Juliet and Romeo and Juliet gets to have a moment where it's like how are you so controlling#that you're pushing May to get with a man like 30 years their senior yet you cant deal with me getting with the wrong rich guy and may is#like screw y'all Juliet was The Golden child anyway okay I get what I want now and it's all happily ever after#and angelique gets Lance a magical girl transformation and some CLEAN FUCKING SNEAKERS EVEN MINE ARENT THAT DIRTY N I DONT CLEAN EM FOR SHI#anyways
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#back on my super personal posting bs#last basketball game for the band tonight#augh and misery but at least it’s at Cool Big Semi Circle. Two hour drive at least tho. sigh.#if u from my state you know what I mean. actually wtv it’s obvious idfk Tacoma Dome moment lmaooo#man. last thing of band for the whole year kinda sucks ngl#our band is fucked don’t get me wrong but a part of me still loves it with a lot less cynicism than most of my friends n other band kids do#part of me is like yeah there’s stuff that sucks. but also this is where I’m meant to be and I’m having a good time#the reality is that our director sucks our band sucks nobody practices and we don’t really play well#but in my head#I’m doing well#i practice. a lot. because I like it#All my friends are here#I’m doing what my dad did in Highschool and being like him makes me really happy#which is especially why I’m switching to drumline next year to hopefully be on snare#I’m actually gonna kill myself if I get cymbals i fucking HATE cymbals I will fight my Director on this actually so hard#cus I don’t know shit about percussion#but my dad is a drummer and so is one of my senior friends who is sticking around after they graduate this year#and they’ve both agreed to teach me over the summer#so I’m gonna go fucking crazy hard into practicing so I can do percussion ensemble next year and do drumline too#I’m literally gonna dig in my trenches and fight tooth and nail to get what I want#and I’ve never really done that before#It really feels like I’m determined to prove myself worth of being a snare#not cymbals#not bass#snare#I feel like I was kind of always meant for this; I’ve just been putting it off yknow?#I’m the child of two divorced music majors#my dad is a drummer who was in band his whole life#he loves it. he loves it so much.#my parents moved to New York to chase their dreams and become musicians
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exam period is making me progressively less human
#ib program#biology is killing me#school sucks#senior year#i hate it here#i need time to speed up#24 hours is not a good deal for an ib student#since when is the weekend two days#who decided that#i need to get a grip
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re: the american education system showing high school children their "dead" peers in an effort to lessen teenage drunk driving after prom,
the suing part is one hundred percent true but several parents (including my mom <3) threatened to personally beat the ass of the principal at the time
#i'm small town they all grew up together#when my brother graduated i had just finished seventh grade#and my mom walked up to my brother's now former principal and was like alright henry you have a year#you have a year where you have none of my children in your school. i recommend getting your shit together in the mean time#and the high school had a different principal when i hit ninth grade#mer rambles#the new principal was lisa and we already had beef though thankfully my mother and grandmother were not involved#i got dress coded a lot bc wearing a belt was part of the dress code and i did not own one and had no interesting in procuring one#because i'm autistic and belts fucking suck#but every time i got dress coded teachers would send me directly to the principal bc i had an attitude problem you know how it is#and i'd walk in and lisa would be like “belt again?” and i'd be like “yeah :) how are my grades doing :)”#bc the first time i got sent directly to her i told her to pull up my grades and tell me that a belt mattered to my education#and she would just tell me to go back to class beltless#i was in... sixth or seventh grade at the time?#then lisa moved to the high school my first two years and then became superintendent#during the senior pep rally i was leaving the rally to go to my favorite teacher's classroom bc it was loud#and lisa and one of the other school board members were in the hall bc it was an Event#and they're like Where Are You Going Get Back In There and i was like well lisa i still have anxiety attacks so i'm gonna go be somewhere#else. is that alright with you? and she just waved me off :) <3#i'm a nuisance to any and all authority figures
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