#i felt my heart sinking then | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cosmojjong · 2 years ago

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:(

#feeling sad #but also very numb as well #i keep swinging from crying to feeling nothing #i don't know when i'll actually realize that my grandpa is gone and i won't see him anymore #i don't think it's fully hit me yet #i cannot believe that it's happened #around two weeks ago we were sitting on his couch and he asked me to sit closer as we spoke #and then we held hands and talked about the trip i wanted to go on #that was the first time i had seen him after so long #and he was like 'my sweetheart i want to pay for that trip' and i was like 'oh no please don't worry'#and he said he really wanted to do it for me #his hand was a bit wrinkly but big and warm and he always had this sweet smile on his face #i always felt so cared for and so safe in his presence #he was the first and only man who loved me with his heart #i was his little chick his only granddaughter and even when i grew big he would give me pocket money or pay for my ice cream #i just cannot fathom a life without him #sending messages to my grandma i'd always include him and now it's nothing anymore #even yesterday i went to her house as he passed in the morning #and the alarms went off as he was supposed to take medication but of course he didn't #i felt my heart sinking then #i felt like he would come out of the bedroom or the bathroom but he didn't #when i went to the bathroom his shoes were there.. untouched.. he won't wear them ever again #i don't know why i'm sharing all this here but i don't get the time to be emotional in real life #not because someone's stopping me but because there's so much to decide on and to sort out suddenly #and the fact that his will is that we fly him to where he was born so we can bury him there #but i don't know if i'll be able to go with my health issues #and if i don't go i'm going to beat myself up over it so much because how could i not attend his funeral #when he did so much for me #he'd starve and save up money for me to be able to have clothes and find warm food on my table when i was a child #he did so much for me and yet i am over here debating and worrying over the flight and over everything

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stellasettos · 3 months ago

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IT WAS ANOTHER MIRACLE OF JUDAISM NOT MIRACLE OF JUDAISM OH GOD

#falsettos #i felt my heart sink when i heard hello god

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inkblackorchid · 1 year ago

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Love how this outtro contains both the biggest slap in the face the show has to offer as well as arguably my favourite shot of all outtros, full stop.

#yugioh 5ds #yusei fudo #aki izayoi #akiza izinski #faithshipping #orchid watches 5ds (again)#anyway guess who deadass forgot that the recap episode was a thing that existed #I do always like seeing Carly but ep 130 is easily a contender for the most forgettable episode in the entire show #also.#the d r e a d as I realised that I've reached the final stretch of the show #like this is it. this is the final outtro.#when I tell you I literally felt my heart sink knowing I'm about to get to the final WRGP duel and the ark cradle arc #and CRY LIKE AN IDIOT OVER THE ENDING AGAIN #I'm in too deep help me #I've said it before but THE GRIP THIS SHOW HAS ON ME AFTER TEN YEARS #anyway so if you're wondering why my rewatch is going at s snail's pace now?#IT'S BECAUSE OF THIS #I'M NOT READY TO CRY DAMN IT #episode 130 #screencaps

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yamsgarden · 4 months ago

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Just some more Still Wakes the Deep blah blah, but omg having just been diagnosed Diabetes type 1 myself recently, it makes me only love and feel for Roy 10X more...

This shit is litteraly poison, but so does the food we eat with how much sugar there is in ugh OTL

Never thought in a million year I had DT1, I had 0 symptoms and am in pretty good shape, but then suddenly, organs are starting to hurt really badly out of nowhere...

Don't wait too long poeple and check with your doctors even if there's ''nothing'' T0T and to all Diabetic ppl out there, keep on fighting 💪✨

#random #delete later #first 2 weeks of diagnosis i didn't realized what it meant to live with this #but the 3rd week it really sinked it and i couldn't stop crying everyday #i felt even more like a failure and it made me even more angry that my biological parents left me with that #being adopted i have no medical history and i was already living a quite healthy life style #ofc it could have been even better but now i have to do many extra steps #everything's back to normal now but holy shit that hit me like a truck #plus it was urgent since it had been MONTHS it was left untreated and my family doctor just never told me or bothered to check my blood tes #so ughh idk it sucks with life being already hard as it is #high blood pressure now this... tho theyre probably related #i prepared my bucket list sooo i guess LET'S GO?! jk jk #i'm scared to have a heart attack or stroke in the middle of nowhere where no one i love is around... and that'll be it #but i mean if it happens it happens i guess XD #i'm hopefull now but holy shit... fucking pancreas who just decides to stop working #when you read more about DT1 it just feels like a bad employee who suddenly doesn't want to work anymore #and the good boss cant do anything about it #oh well #as long as i can still create art i'll be fine and happy #diabetic? more like diabethicc

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toadtusks · 4 months ago

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The Prime Deities care deeply for their creations but in the end will still prioritize the safety of the Betrayers, their siblings, over them. Even if those very siblings are the biggest threat to all mortal lives.

#critical role spoilers #I can’t articulate as well as smarter people on here but oh my god Brennan your mind #when the archmage said the weapon was to help the Primes get rid of the betrayers I felt my heart sink #I love how messy this all is #I can’t wait to see how it all goes down

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bellatrixdulac · 7 months ago

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When Lumine's VA introduced Itto in the 4.6 stream as "And Itto, the harbinger of..." I know I lost 10 years of my lifespan.

#casually throws the rock to the side...ah so that was a joke #no seriously because we probabily miss one fatuus still #I felt my heart sink at that ngl #arataki itto #genshin impact #genshin impact 4.6 live stream

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hisohisoart · 29 days ago

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Im feeling things tonight.

#im very tired #and im listening to something very slow and lazy but heartfelt #it fells as though the world is slowly sinking #my sight is all blury and i can feel my heart beat in my ribs and in my throat #it's a very slow feeling #very thick and heavy #like molasses #the best this i can compare it to is when i'd come home from school and pass out #and i'd wake up to my mom calling me down for dinner and it was dark out #and time felt thick and dark and heavy #and mom would look at me and ask if i'd just woken up in that fond soft voice #it isn't unpleasant just a tad overwhelming

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the-toasted-teacake · 2 months ago

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Just caught up on quali... 🥲

#obviously disappointed with the Q1 exit #but even more than that I just felt my heart sink anticipating the 'narratives' and the hate #it's just so fucking tiring

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jkpng · 5 months ago

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Well .

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egg-emperor · 1 year ago

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Twitter had a way of reminding me why it's been a lot better for me that I've been staying away from it a whole lot lately. saw two takes about Eggman on my tl that deeply irked me but I'm being so brave about it lol. I need to keep this Twitter avoidance up

#no I'm not about to rant about them I've been getting better at managing my feelings and reactions #I felt my heart sink seeing them and feelings of dread lol maybe it's cus it's been a while so it hit harder but why is my body so dramatic #I just blocked and I'm moving on 👍

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yamikawaii · 9 months ago

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i wanna go home i wanna be with yoomiee

#im rlly sleepy and just thinking #theres nowhere thats ever rlly felt like ''home'' to me even the house i lived in for the first 18 years of my life even the one i do now #ig bc in both of them and in any other place ive been i was never rlly a priority i was just.someone existing there #ive never rlly been anyones Equal.may be an inferiority complex but it feels like sinking and ive never known what its like to not feel it #i just feel the inherent knowledge that im below everyone else at all times idk #but i like to imagine me and yoomtah as Equal no matter what kinda actual enhancements she has as a cyborg we're on the same level #bc i think the only way i'll feel ''home'' is by being acknowledged as something that is Not inferior #as something that deserves a place to exist comfortably without feeling entirely alienated and lost #and i can kinda imagine what itd feel like when i envision her and i together #with the exact same love and respect for each other just being comfortable together feeling At Home with each other #its warm and comforting but it doesnt feel like much more than an idea bc ive never rlly had it for real #also im aware that irl me wouldnt be equal to her at all bc she can do Everything and iiiiiiii Cant do anything ever #but my si aka realer-than-irl me has cool magical girl powers and has killed for her multiple times so its fineeeeeeeeeee #i would be unstoppable if this vessel i was placed in could shoot heart shaped lasers but alas #does any of this even make any sense jm rlly tired and just rambling abt yoomtah As usual #i want to go home i want her to take me home

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sylvaridreams · 1 year ago

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Bourbon got world completion today, let's GO Bourbie doll.

#gw2 #so proud... i had a moment while finishing Timberline Falls #where i looked at how much I had left to do and felt my heart sink. thought i had a whole nother map to do #but nope i am FINISHED #\o/ WAHOO

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minotaurmilkbucket · 1 year ago

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bad mistake trying to open tumblr at work that one time. i scrolled and nearly saw dick sucking art on my dash and i had to scroll away faster than a powerwalking gay man

#it was nice art tbh #and at first glance i didnt realize it was a dick #but then when the realization hit i felt my heart sink #it sunk because this was my FIRST WEEK at work

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seariii · 11 months ago

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IN A BIT I'M GONNA PLAY WITH A FRIEND BUT IF MY INSOMNIA DOESN'T LET ME SLEEP I WILL TRY TO MAKE A POST ABOUT HARUKA BEING SERVANT OF EVIL AND MUU BEING DAUGHTER OF EVIL BECAUSE GUYS THOSE SONGS FIT THEM SO SO SO SO SO MUCH

#i sang servant of evil earlier and almost died trying (still sick) BUT BOY DO I LOVE THAT SONG #and come on you can take seari away from the music but you cant take the music away from seari #< almost used real name there and felt my heart sink

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looking-cool-joker · 2 years ago

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Alright, I’m obsessed with tiny bendy he is the cutest little critter

#just rambling #joker watches someone play batdr #no but i actually felt really bad about audrey hurting him #and i love the added details with the teary eyes #although it made my heart sink

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septembersghost · 2 years ago

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the stanley donen gene kelly vincente minnelli fred astaire influences in this movie are so immediately potent i'm losing my mind it really says something about me that i've watched like a dozen movies in two weeks and the two that hit me hardest are the one about the *checks notes* real life musician from the late 50s-70s where i knew the basic facts and big hits and tragic ending going in yet still attached so much to the human aspect of the story and *checks again* the romantic musical that intentionally riffs on old hollywood and the illusory draw yet necessity of dreams and is bound to be heartbreaking

#and before these two the one that got me most last year was ttb where i also knew the real story and heartbreaking ending #and in fact already knew the music itself and yet it still both shattered and consoled my heart and felt like a revelation #it's that they're all about art and music and humanity and passion and the art of making art #ur girl is sinking back into her classic hollywood and musical theatre roots i fear #i'm unwell #ironically my feelings for these movies is actually proof that i'm very firmly returning to myself #myself is just unwell <3 #i have one small complaint but i shan't voice it #also i have not slept but we're pretending it's fine.#jess.mess

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