#i feel. well i'll be honest i don't feel very good. this has been a rough month for me

[with-my-murder-flute]

Re: The Tomb of Dragons ship situation/ending, spoilers for A Companion to Wolves and Angel of the Crows

Like I respect Addison's right to write the stories that feel meaningful to her, she doesn't have to just feed us fanbait, not every author has to do that

but I was white-knuckling up to the very last sentence of the book

I have trust issues ever since A Companion to Wolves, where the first book ends and you're like. I guess they have somehow found a way to survive and be happy in their unusual approach to society's sexual mores! And then the next book begins and it's like "Oh actually the main character is just resigned to permanent unhappiness with this, maybe he will dredge up a thin trickle of joy in life focusing on something totally different." And I'll be honest, I put that book down and never picked it up again, because I did the good girl Catholic thing and thought "Oh well I'll never experience sexual joy or deep enduring love but maybe I'll have like idk a career or some shit" long enough for one lifetime. NO MORE. I just gave up and went back to Every Marine a Wolfbrother.

And then Angel of the Crows was like, "I got shot down every single time I reached for queer joy or relationships and the one relationship that does remain is not really what I want or need and maybe I am a bit fundamentally unlovable, but I'll survive, we get by," and I was, again... I recognize this is not a story for me. It's not what I want from a story. But also, I am so disappointed and tired here.

So with this series I was just so much like... she does not owe us fanbait, I have trained myself to think it's tacky and bad to get upset that an author has not provided the exact kind of representation we want exactly how we want it. I watched the Good Omens fandom explosions and don't want to do that.

But at the same time. We have been hearing about the extreme gay agony of this beautiful muppet for FOUR BOOKS STRAIGHT. He is the world's most sopping wet little meow meow, and quite respectfully, if you do not want your fans to form a frenzy and start burning down uninhabited buildings due to an overload of unrequited textual sexual tension, MAYBE DON'T FOCUS ON IT QUITE SO MUCH.

So I'm here at the end of Tomb of Dragons going, "I guess I'm okay with this? I guess I can live? It's not exactly what I wanted and it's not delivered to the degree I wanted, but I guess we can get by here."

Is this what Stockholm Syndrome feels like? I literally don't believe Stockholm Syndrome is a real thing, I think it's been bunk since the day it was created, but also, this feels like what Stockholm Syndrome would feel like.

I will probably be able to like the new love interest! I can see myself in the future being happy with the way the story ended up going in, once I get over the fact that it went there! This makes sense and I can see it and reconciling all those feelings is what fanfiction's for!

I just also... am not so excited to see what else Addison's working on now. Because this overarching theme or emotional focus on the yearning for warmth and closeness and empathy and touch and desire, and the realization that you will just have to make do with slightly unsatisfying substitutes instead, is just way too similar to the defeatist ways I learned to approach life with when I was a child. It's exactly the mindset I wanted to get away from then and am still learning to let go of now.

I don't want to squash the fandom with my disappointment and negativity, and if fandom does just turn into everyone being angry and bitter that the author personally flipped them the bird and actually everything about these books is proof that they've always been shit, no thanks, not hanging out with that again. If I stick around, it's for Thara getting railed in exactly the way he wants in some happier future, and figuring out what that would look like.

[halewynslady]

Spoilers for the Rebecca show currently playing in Brussels

Mrs Danvers. She is immovable. She walks in straight lines for most of the play, it is like watching Pacman or Snake. She nails the monotonous voice. She is barely taller than ich, which is nice. (look, there is important shipping to be done in every Rebecca okay) She wears a black livrei, like the other servants. Her hair is pinned up so close to the head, that it may as well be short. As I said a very Gender performance. I love it. It is a really cool interpretation of her!

Time to go into handkerchiefs. Ich drops the handkerchief scene is present in its full glory.

And gets continued in a fashion.

When Mrs Danvers shows Ich the new room for ich and Mr de W in the more distant part of the house that was not used before, ich in her innocence and concern asks: ''I hope you will be able to hear us?'' poor kind thing. so funny. I almost feel bad for laughing (not really).

(at some point, later, chronology is gone again) We talk about Rebecca's decaying body too, which I like. Because I like my femme fatales messed up.

I also am in favour of conversational openers such as ''Do you believe in ghosts?'' Small talk and Mrs Danvers do not mix.

We get a few Rebecca voice-overs. Ich gets crushed under the Rebecca of it all. She starts to cry, pulls out handkerchief and behold a curly R in the middle of it. I believe gold R on white cloth (don't take my word for it, may as well have been red and I'm misremembering), reminds me of the 80th anniversary book edition. Ich curls in on herself on the floor, the handkerchief completely over her head, covering her Identity with R. Mrs Danvers shows up, helps her up, takes the handkerchief, and of course, snifs it to then wax about Rebecca's perfume...girl.... I love how you never change.

Her next brilliant plan is to hand Ich a plain handkerchief when she returns from rescuing Rebecca's handkerchief. She will bring Ich a handkerchief each day. One for every day of the week. Like preset, with an order to it. She completely unnecessarily adds ''this is tuesday (I don't know which day honestly, could be another) 's handkerchief. Today is tuesday.'' It is so her, it is so funny. I believe Robert was watching this unfold and just commented ''She likes you'' at ich, funny, which, hell, who knows with this woman.

The admiration Danvers expresses for Rebecca is unaparallelled. She loves Rebecca's Freedom so much. Rebecca was never afraid of anything. I'd love freedom too. It is very strong. A good message all around.

We have the white curtains for Rebecca's room of course and a lofty iron window frame.

Ich is hanging on this window frame, crying, her mermaid dress still on, when Mrs Danvers enters and we have the 'why don't you'' part of the story we all love. It was changed. In the way fanfiction changes it. With more compassion. More...well, I'll just tell you. Mrs Danvers first talks of how everyone envies Rebecca. Ich too. She does not leave herself out of the list either. She says it was not she who made ich wear this dress. It was Rebecca who made ich wear the dress. Which is a take, for sure.

She is very hung up on Rebecca. (I know, this is no spoiler) The fun thing is that Ich notices. She asks ''Did you love her?'', ''Did she love you?'' If my French is good enough Danvers replied quite vaguely to the second question since it is Rebecca and with Rebecca only Rebecca knows (my phrasing). I was overwhelmed to be honest that it got addressed this directly. What a dream come true.

When we are at the you are not happy here, you'd better jump -implied, there was a sentence added here which (again if I remember correctly) has Danvers suggest right as ich is about to give in to both go.

When they draw back from the window, they were cluching each other. Very much clutching, in fear, in gratitude, in sudden friendship,.... Mrs Danvers asks ich if she may help her and does help her out of her wig, to then look on her and now truly see ''you are but a child.'' YES, thank you, we know Maxim is a huge creep. *pushes Max off a cliff*

[metallicames]

Teenage dream

Part 1

Description: After a night of passion, the reader must return to reality and face her father and James and figure out which direction to go and whether to follow her feelings.

Warnings: angst (very little), age gap, petting.

⸻⭒⸱ 🖤 ⸱⭒⸻

The silence of the return trip overwhelms even my thoughts. My father has obviously been weird all day with me and James and now I don't know how to start the conversation. I feel terribly guilty and embarrassed but I want to make him understand that I did what I did because I wanted it for a long time and that James treated me in the best way possible.

"So... how long have you liked James?"

His question throws me off, I stop staring at the fields outside the window and turn to him.

"Well.. I've always had a crush on him to be honest." I confess embarassed.

"I would never have expected this thing... from either of you!" his tone is dark and serious, I can see he gripping the steering wheel tightly with one hand.

“Dad…I’m sorry, but I want you to know that it started with me…James behaved well, he didn’t-” my sentence stops halfway.

“Y/N don’t justify him, you’re a girl, he's a man, he could have avoided it!” the words come out of his mouth almost shouted.

“But I’m 20, I’m not a little girl anymore! You’re just annoyed that he’s your friend!”I exclaim almost trembling with anger.

"No, you don’t understand…you're my daughter I don't want you to suffer. I’d rather you never see each other again!” His words hit me, a lump forms in my throat and I try to swallow, holding back the tears.

"I don't even know if he'll be interested in seeing me again, it might have been the first and last time..” my voice shakes I don't want to believe my own words, in my heart I hope that James likes me even if this would make things complicated, especially with my father.

“Y/N I'm sorry to tell you but it's better this way, he's always on tour you're studying and you have to commit to college, it's not a feasible thing”. His tone becomes calmer and sweeter, I know he's right but I wish it wasn't like that. I go back to looking at the fields out the window getting lost in my thoughts until we arrive at our destination.

I spend three days with my head completely elsewhere, in class I can barely take notes my brain continues to process possible scenarios of what could happen. I don't even know if James has spoken to my father, I don't know what his intentions are, I feel suspended unable to act and think clearly. I don't talk about it with anyone, not even my roommate with whom I have a good relationship, I'm afraid that she'll confuse me even more and that she'll deceive me just to make me feel better.

While I'm lost in my thoughts in the college's yard my phone rings making me literally jump out of the bench and I come back to reality, I read the name on the screen - Hetfield - my head spins and I feel my heart rate increase, I stare at the phone unable to act, after a few seconds I take a deep breath and I answer.

"Hello? James?" I try to keep a calm and relaxed tone but inside I feel like I'm dying, "Hey! Sorry to bother you are you in class?" - "I just left", I lie shamelessly, actually I'm on a bench staring into space.

"Sorry, I'll be quick, what time do you finish tonight? I was thinking of picking you up, I need to talk to you” his tone becomes uncertain and I understand that my father must have said something to him, I remain silent for a moment before answering.

"Ummh. Ok fine, I'll finish at 6.30 pm, I'll send you the address of the exit so we can meet there" - “Perfect, see you in a couple of hours.” His tone is almost cold, detached as if he does not want to reveal any emotion and I begin to fear the worst.

We say goodbye and I spend the next few hours paranoid.

It's 6:20 pm and I head to the bathroom to get myself ready while I try to calm down, I don't know why I'm so nervous I almost want to throw up and my heart is racing like crazy. I take one last look in the mirror, -with my girly skirt, my college sweatshirt and my backpack I look even younger, shit- I think to myself.

I head towards the exit and find James' black pick up parked outside, the sun is setting, I cross the road and look around hoping no one sees me.

"Hey, hi James" I exclaim as soon as I get in the car, even though it's only been three days I've missed seeing him and smelling his perfume.

"Hi Y/N! How are you?" he turns towards me he takes off his sunglasses and looks at me smiling, I notice a change in his gaze the light I had seen when we were in the mountains has gone out and I glimpse a hint of worry. "I'm fine, and you? Are you tired?" I ask as I fasten my seat belt trying to avoid his gaze. “A little, I'm thoughtful, I talked to your dad. Wait let’s go to a quieter area...” While he speaks he moves the car away from the entrance. There is a few moments of silence in which I try to process the information. “What.. what did you say to each other?” My eyes look at him as he is intent on driving, I want to cry but I don’t want to create even more embarrassment so I hold back the tears with all my strength.

“He’s worried Y/N, and I feel like shit, you know, he’s a good friend of mine and I don’t want to wrong him. I don’t even know what to do, what happened the other day it's stuck with me.”

The pick up stops near my apartment and James looks at me again, his gaze penetrates me and makes me feel completely exposed, as if he could see my thought.

“I talked to him too, he wants to protect me but at the same time he forbids me from doing something that makes me happy, because I like being with you James, you make me feel good.” While I speak I turn towards him with my body shortening the distance, I see James’s gaze linger for a few moments on my legs and then rise to my face.

“Me too Y/N, I’ve thought about you often in these three days, but there’s always a part of me that tells me that it’s wrong. I’m much older than you and I should make the right decision even if it hurts.”

The faint hope that had been created inside me vanishes, I shrug my shoulders and start playing with the edge of my skirt so as not to show my disappointment. I thought he wanted to continue seeing me instead he seems to have found a nice way to tell me that he wants to move on with his life even if his body language confuses me. He seems cold and detached since I got in the car as if he wanted to keep his distance but at the same time I notice that he is holding back as if he fears what he might do if he let himself go, his eyes betray him.

"Ok, I thought you cared.. so.." I feel so stupid.

He moves closer with his body, reaching out a hand towards mine and squeezing it: "Of course I care Y/N, and seeing you here in front of me makes everything more difficult..".

The warmth of his hand makes me melt, without realizing it he is making the situation even more painful.

"If this is your decision I don't want to force you...it'll remain a good memory I hope for both of us and... I don't know what to say James.. " My eyes fill with tears of disappointment I look out the window avoiding his gaze.

An almost surreal silence follows, his eyes are fixed on me then I improvise, I undo my seat belt I take my backpack I open the door.

As I prepare to leave James grabs my arm forcefully, I turn around confused and I linger on his eyes, dark, intense.

Why is he doing this to me?

before I can process his gesture James comes closer to me, tightening his grip on my arm and kisses me tenderly on the lips, resting his forehead against mine, running a hand up my neck and then resting it on my cheek.

“your dad is right when he says it's complicated and if we keep going we'll hurt each other, I know what's right, but I need to keep doing the wrong thing” he murmurs.

I'm almost in shock, the constant alternation of different feelings leaves me in a daze that fades away when James kisses me again this time with more passion. I let myself go trying to turn off my brain for a moment while James slowly slides his tongue into my mouth, letting out a little moan. Our tongues meet, rolling over each other, savoring and intertwining with more and more passion and desire, stopping when lips are just barely touching and we breath each other's air, our breathing already labored. “I can’t resist you…” he whispers, placing a hand behind my neck.

I put a hand on his warm chest, and as James begins to kiss my neck I slowly lower it, feeling every part of his torso covered by the thin layer of his shirt under my fingertips, stopping just above his belt. I feel his altered breathing in my ear as he bites my lobe, returning to kiss me shortly after. My hand goes down meeting his big erection pressed against his jeans, I touch it making him pant harder in my mouth, I want him so much that I'm going crazy, his body is a magnet, I can't resist him.

Our hands explore each other's bodies, his fingers make their way along my bare legs giving me goosebumps, they creep under my skirt, I open my legs slightly to make room for him and I feel his big hand approaching my core. His thumb moves on the fabric of my panties sending shocks of pleasure through me as it reach my clit, I squeeze my legs slightly at the sensation and he smiles at me letting out a little giggle. While our tongues meet again his thumb applies more and more pressure moving my panties to the side making me wet from the growing stimulation.

Our mouths search and devour each other, our tongues intertwine while our bodies become impatient as do our hands.

I start to undo his belt and slide my hand into his pants, feeling his bulge under my fingertips and start to palpate it making him gasp deeply. When I open my eyes to admire him and stare into his blue iris out of the corner of my eye I see a car parking near us.

“Shit… that’s one of my roommates” I pull away from James and wave at her pretending to be indifferent while he still has his fingers stuck on my cunt. “Do you think she saw us? Do you want us to move?” he asks me almost dazed with his pupils completely dilated and his lips glossy.

“I don't know! Is better if I go back inside, they’ll all be back home now. I want to take it slow, I mean, see how it evolves and tell them about this later.” Obviously my body would like something else but I try to be rational and not give in to my instinct.

"Ok.. so are you leaving me go home in this state? You’re a mean girl!” he says looking between his legs, my eyes follow his gaze stopping on his boner, I swallow noisily.

“I know, I know fuck James… if someone sees us doing it in the car it would be pretty embarrassing, I'm saying this especially for you” I really care about him, I don't want any pictures or strange news about us to come out in some newspaper, even if a part of me would like to get in the back seat and do literally everything with him.

“Yeah.. You're right...unfortunately” he caresses my face delicately looking at me tenderly. “Will we talk in the next few days? I'm away this week but I would like to hear from you and maybe see you when I get back.” he stares at me with a sweet look but still dazen and horny.

“Of couse, we'll be able to reconcile our commitments, I'm sure”. We give each other one last soft and slow kiss I get out of the car with butterflies in my stomach.

I cross the doorstep with his taste still on my lips, I feel ecstatic, even though I know it will be difficult to hang out with someone like James the connection between us is too special not to try.

As I am about to fall asleep under the covers in my room, my phone vibrates, I immediately pick it up with a very quick movement, instantly coming out of my torpor.

Hetfield: "I still have your scent on me, I don't think I'll sleep tonight".

Well, I don't think I'll get any sleep either.

𝓣𝓸 𝓫𝓮 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓮𝓭...

[autistic-shaiapouf]

Oh haha yeah I'm definitely feeling better <- he is not talking to people

[munsonsmixtapes]

Taste Me

virgin!Eddie x fem!reader

summary: Eddie gets a tongue piercing and you give him the opportunity to do something he has never done before

cw: MDNI (18+) oral (f recieving)

This is part two to Touch Me part three

"That's really fucking cool," you told Eddie as you stared at his tongue piercing that he had been excited to show you since he had gotten it done. He had been wanting to get one for a while and your nipple piercings had encouraged him so he went for it.

He was still trying to get used to it but had a newfound confidence because of it. The thing made him feel hot, the shyness he had, the awkwardness, slowly melting away as you stared at him, your eyes darkening.

The two of you had made out a few times since the first time, you always stopping when it got a bit too heated. You were always so kind to him even though they contradicted your kisses. Those were always rough and sloppy, and lazy but that was the way you both liked it.

Eddie would have been lying, though, if he said he didn't want more. He felt like he was finally ready to kick it up a notch. To take things to the next level even though he was scared to. He didn't want to make you uncomfortable and to be honest, he would have even known how to ask.

"You look hot," you told him pulling him out of his thoughts. Really? You thought so? Coming from you, that had to be the highest compliment he had ever received.

"I do?" He asked, suddenly feeling nervous about having your hot gaze on him.

"Of course you do, baby." That nickname always made his heart swell. "Want me to show you how hot I think you are?" You asked, batting your eyelashes and Eddie could already feel his dick getting hard.

"Please." The word came out like a whine and Eddie tried his hardest not to sound desperate but he was. You grabbed onto the back of his neck then pressed your lips to his in a sloppy manner.

You took no time to slip your tongue into his mouth, letting out a moan as you felt the piercing against it. It was cold, but you liked the feeling, immediately imagining what it would have felt like against your hot, wet, cunt. But you knew he had never done anything like that before you so you wanted to treat lightly.

"Do you want to try something new?" You asked and even though Eddie had no idea what you were talking about, he still nodded enthusiastically. Like always, he was down for whatever.

"Something new?" He asked, his eyebrows furrowing. "Like what?" You had done pretty much anything besides penetrative sex so he was wondering what else there could have possibly been.

"Well," you responded, grabbing on to a piece of his hair, twirling it around your finger as you put in a flirty expression. "I was wondering if you wanted to eat me out. I bet your piercing would feel really good against my cunt."

Eddie's eyes went wide as his cheeks turned pink. He had been wanting to do exactly that for weeks, but couldn't get the confidence to ask.

"I'd love to, but I don't know how."

"Just do whatever feels natural and if you're struggling, I'll help."

"Okay," he nodded and followed you to the bed where you went to lie back, making sure that your legs were hanging off the edge, your feet planted on the floor.

Eddie got down on his knees in front of you, spreading your legs wide then putting one over each shoulder just like he had read about so many times. He then turned his head and pressed kisses up your leg, sweet and gentle just like him. He took his time to warm you up even though he was eager to get to it. And so were you, apparently, with the way you were squirming on the bed.

He repeated the same action on your other leg then came face to face with your cunt, still covered by your underwear, but it was clear how wet you were by the very damp spot. He pushed up your skirt to give him so more room then dove in, pressing kiss after kiss to your clothed cunt then introduced his tongue, making sure to apply a good amount of pressure so you would have been able to feel it underneath your underwear.

"Eddie, please," you whined and he was quick to pull the underwear off and toss it across the room before going on again, his lips colliding with your clit, licking and sucking on it as your hands found their way into his hair like they always did.

He didn't really know what he was doing, just trying to figure out what you liked and what you didn't. By the way you were grabbing at his hair, he concluded that he was doing a good job.

His tongue flattened against your slit and you let out a gasp as foreign feeling of the piercing against the sensitive spot. He licked across it slowly so you could feel it and a moan escaped your lips in response.

"So good," you moaned and Eddie just chuckled, feeling more confident in himself.

"Yeah?" He asked, pulling away slightly. "You like that?"

He licked one more time before sucking on the spot, even harder this time to see your reaction. Your heels were digging into his back as you pushed yourself closer to him to the point where his face was fully buried in you. He continued to suck on and kiss the spot, making sure to mix in his tongue every once in a while as your heels dug even further into his back.

He then shoved his tongue inside you, swirling it around and that seemed to cause you to come completely undone as your thighs pressing into the sides of his head as you clenched around him, his tongue hitting that one spot that made you see stars.

Eddie kept going as you reached your orgasm, trying to see how many you could hit as he worked on you, wanting you to be absolutely wrecked once he was done with you.

He removed his tongue then went back to your clit, swirling his tongue around it, wanting you to feel his piercing as much a possible. You were gripping the sheets now, wanting to give his hair a break, feeling for back arch the time.

"Taste so good," he said. "And look at you," he pulled away to get a look at you. "Taking me so well. Got any more left in you, hon?"

You weren't entirely sure where all of this confidence had come from, but it was hot. He was hot. As long as he wanted to keep going, you'd have the energy for it.

"So much," you told him between labored breaths and that seemed like an invitation so Eddie dove in for more, not wanting to taste every inch of you, wondering if it all tasted as good as your cunt.

You both stayed like that for hours, him buried between your thighs while you let him do whatever he wanted to you, orgasm after orgasm rolling through you. You decided that you would have let him do that for as long as he liked, loving the way he was able to know exactly what you wanted without even asking. And you supposed now that you were going to have to return the favor sooner or later.

[xiaq]

I want an AU where Steve is a werewolf and Eddie is a vampire except neither of them know about the other.

Eddie is the frontman of an up and coming band, but he's left his coven and surrounded himself with humans. They perform after sunset anyway so it's easy enough for him to hide his nature.

Steve has similarly left his toxic family pack and built his own pseudo-pack through the kids. He works as a park ranger. Or an ornithologist. Or something else nature-y/nerdy. But no one knows about his furry little secret.

Maybe Steve ends up attending a concert with one of the kids who has VIP passes and Eddie zeros in on Steve immediately at the meet and greet because he's pretty and preppy and delightfully out of place and also he smells good. And Steve is having similar thoughts, but he tries to play it off because there's no way an honest to god rock star would be interested in him and his polo and his boat shoes (also his hearing is temporarily fucked from the concert, so he doesn't register Eddie's lack of heartbeat).

After some light flirting, Eddie invites Steve back to his hotel and Steve is like, you know what? Yes. I am going to have a one night stand with the gorgeous front man of a metal band and I'll probably fall a little in love with him by the end of the night and it will break my heart when he kicks me out in the morning, but it will be an experience. Let me go drop off my kids and I'll be right back.

Except what he doesn't know is Eddie is planning to have a little snack while they're in the throes of passion––not enough to hurt Steve or anything, just enough that he'll have a pleasurable blackout and wake up tired but sated.

The only problem is that neck-biting (that breaks the skin) for wolves is the equivalent of marriage.

So when Eddie bites Steve, instead of a venom-drunk human, peacefully slipping into sleep in his arms, he gets a very horny, very confused, werewolf who is now insisting that they're married.

I can't decide if it would be funnier if Wolves/Vampires didn't know about each other, Ie:

"You're a Werewolf?" Eddie says, "What do you mean you're a werewolf? Werewolves exist? No. Shut up. Prove it."

And:

"Holy shit. A vampire. Vampires are real," Steve reaches for Eddie's face and Eddie is so baffled by the everything of this situation that he lets Steve pinch Eddie's top lip and peel it up off his fangs for a mortifyingly long moment. Eddie draws the line when he starts poking at Eddie's incisors, though.

"Why do I feel funny?" Steve mutters. "Will your venom kill me?"

"How should I know," Eddie hisses, only a little hysterical, "I didn't know wolves existed until two minutes ago, I've never bitten a wolf before."

"And you won't be biting any others, mister. Infidelity is not ok."

The other option is that wolves and vamps DO know about each other but stay so isolated in their covens and packs (and loners are super unusual) that they never interact. So Steve and Eddie are both like, dang, I'd been raised to think all of your kind were smelly/ugly/gross, but you uh, don't fit into that box at all. Weird.

Regardless, Steve (still naked, probably) crosses his arms all huffy, like, "well, we're married now, you're not going to bite me and then cast me aside like some harlot," and Eddie is like "...I'm weirdly ok with this, actually. No arguments here." And eventually they live happily ever after.

[mcflymemes]

A HANDFUL OF MISCELLANEOUS PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue most likely taken from taskmaster, adjust as necessary

i was so shit at that.

i don't know what the hell is going on.

you know i'm strong, so if i break this, that's on you.

i'm under a lot of stress.

are you going to explain yourself?

this isn't fair.

there's a peep hole.

what am i gonna do with that?

i wish that was a joke.

was it that bad?

have you tried it?

it could take a few months.

there's something inside this.

i'm good at this! i'm very good.

can you argue with me though?

you look fabulous.

do you chase people?

we'll come back to that later.

was that wrong?

i would have done it... if you'd done your fucking job.

say it. we're all adults here.

whisper it to me.

that's enough!

god, i almost believed you.

look at me!

listen, i don't care about that.

we are lovers.

where's the cheese grater?

live your truth. if you like it, you like it.

i don't feel good saying this.

would you like some dessert?

i didn't say it was going to be funny.

this is amazing.

the least i could do was rob him.

they're all pieces of shit.

i make this look good.

how do you make cereal? do you add the milk first, or add the cereal first?

how dare you.

this has been a weird week for me.

i dressed as spongebob to go to a party.

i find it religiously insensitive.

let's never speak of it again.

are you married?

maybe you and i could hang out sometime.

i didn't realize you had a degree.

can i play a saxophone? no.

there's a dignity in total failure.

you look happy.

i am happy any day that i'm with you.

i just feel like we've got so much in common.

what life choices brought you here?

we're creatures of habit, aren't we?

would you like some champagne?

so... i've set it on fire.

when i don't smile, people think i'm dead.

he needs to smile more.

that's my favorite bee gees song.

i'm in quite a lot of pain.

am i missing something?

here we are!

what's your favorite swear word?

not today, satan.

you're doing so well today!

this is where the magic doesn't happen.

smells nice in here!

nice to know i'll never find love.

i don't know if you can tell, but i feel quite lonely.

shall we hold hands?

neither of you noticed this woman lying on the floor?

it's in your pocket!

don't know what's going on... but then to be honest, i've not had a clue what's going on for most of this.

i don't mean to be rude.

do you feel any sense of shame?

[changetyre]

Hold this Papa

SUMMARY: While facing symptoms of your most recent pregnancy Max is tasked with looking after your youngest daughter while on a meeting. Part of the Verstappen Family Verse

WARNINGS: Crack, fluffiness, pregnancy sickness

A/N: Happy Halloween! Enjoy.

"Max don't worry I can-" You were cut off by your wave of nausea forced to take deep breaths in order not to throw up right then and there. 

"Baby, stop it's fine. I can watch her, they'll understand." Max insisted. 

Today Max had an important Zoom meeting with his management team and other team bosses who had been making Max offers which he'd be a fool not to at least listen to. Lea was out with her uncle Lando who'd offered to take her for the day and you were going to stay with Lea and have a girl's day. 

That was until you woke up with the worst nausea of your pregnancy so far. You'd woken up immediately throwing up and had failed to keep much food down all morning. Max offered to cancel everything and take you to the hospital but you knew how important this meeting was and told him you could go after if it was still this bad. 

Max reluctantly accepted but he still knew you wouldn't be able to look after Ivy properly with the state you were in and he very much preferred if you could focus on trying to hydrate and keep some food down for now.

"Hmm I think it's getting better, I haven't thrown up that apple slice I had 10 minutes ago." You commented as the nausea somewhat passed. 

"That's good but I'm still taking Ivy." Max kissed your cheek before walking away needing to hurry for his meeting in 2 minutes. 

"Fine. But if she's too much trouble just send me a text and I'll come grab her." You hollered as he walked out. 

"Okay," Max yelled back before picking Ivy up from the living room where she had been playing and taking her inside his office which was still big enough for Ivy to remain entertained as he had brought in a few of her toys as well. "Okay, Ivy stay in here okay? Papa's going to be on a phone call so we have to be quiet but if you need something come to whisper to me okay." Max explained to his daughter. 

"Okay, papa." Ivy giggled not fully grasping the instructions but already too entertained with a toy she'd picked up from the floor. 

Max smiled kissing his daughter's head before walking over to his desk where he quickly connected to his Zoom call. 

"Morning Max, how's y/n doing?" Raymond, Max's manager who had been alerted of the possible disruptions asked. 

"Morning, uh, still feeling pretty poorly but she's putting a brave face on for me at the moment." Max answered polity. 

"Papa." Max heard the hushed voice of his daughter beside him looking down to see her handing him a Barbie doll.

"Thank you, Ivy." Max took it from her quickly muting himself as the meeting began. Ivy ran away happily. 

Max locked his focus into the meeting as soon as crucial information began to play out, taking a small notebook out he jotted down important points and questions he might have to discuss at the end so apart from a few glances to check his daughter wasn't in actual danger Max didn't fully process what his daughter was getting up to. 

"Papa hold this." Ivy ran back to Max handing him a wooden block which Max took and placed on his lap alongside the barbie he'd been previously given. 

"To be fully honest with you I care about the car, I need a good car and right now, dismissing the last few races, RedBull has given me a good consistent car, what are your guarantees?" Max asked. 

"Hold this papa." Ivy had once again run over to Max handing him a coloring book. Max took it without question looking down and noticing a variety of toys on his lap he had no recollection of receiving.

Looking back to the meeting he noticed Raymond struggling to keep a straight face as Ivy once again walked into the frame handing Max a tiara. "Put it on papa," Ivy whined when Max simply added it to the array of toys on his lap. 

"Shh okay Ivy." Max accepted not wanting to upset his daughter further putting the tiara on his head. 

"Looking good Max." Everyone collectively laughed in the meeting. 

"Just girl dad things." Max laughed with them. 

Luckily Ivy seemed to entertain herself with this for most of the meeting simply filling Max's lap with things as well as handing him things to wear but it also seemed to tire her out. Just as the meeting was wrapping up Ivy walked over to her dad once more. 

"Papa up." Ivy whined. 

Max happily picked up his daughter letting everything on his lap fall to the floor to set her down on his lap. "I'm almost done, Ivy." Max kissed his daughter's cheek as she wrapped her small arms around his neck resting her head on his chest. 

"Papa I miss mommy." Ivy sighed. 

"I know baby I miss her too, I'm almost done." Max rubbed his daughter's back soothingly. 

It didn't take much longer for the meeting to finally end but once it did Max looked down to see his daughter fast asleep in his arms.  

Walking back outside with Ivy in his arms he was relieved to find you in the kitchen having a proper meal which looked to be almost done. "How are you feeling my love?" Max asked you. 

"Aww my sweet baby." You first acknowledged your sleeping daughter giving her back a rub before answering Max. "Much better, I had a smoothie before this and managed to keep it all down." 

"That's great schatje." Max leaned down to kiss you. "Let me put Ivy in her bed then we can cuddle for a bit." 

"Sounds perfect." You smiled happily. "No more vomiting please." You spoke down to your bump jokingly. 

Despite the harder pregnancy, everything was perfect. 

[bowsandsturniolos]

pairing: sub!chris x soft!dom!reader

warnings: smut, dirty + sweet talk, hand job, begging, no actual p in v, teasing, edging, oral, no use of y/n, dry humping, use of vibe, pet names (baby, sweetheart, good boy, ma, etc).

-------------------------------------------------------------

you're on chris's lap, his boner poking into your thigh. you let out a shaky sigh, your resolve slowly crumbling more and more.

"chris, your brothers are home. this isn't.. no." you mumble, for some reason still trying to reason with him, knowing damn well he won't break.

"please, ma? i need you. s-so.. fuck. so bad." he whispers, rutting his hips up. your tongue runs along your inner cheek as you stare at the wall, thinking.

if you're honest, you don't really feel like having sex right now. but you still want to get chris off. you glance over at the needy boy trapped between your thighs.

"can you stay quiet?" you ask casually, cocking an eyebrow. you know damn well he can't. but maybe he'll try.

"yes, ma. i'll.." he swallows. "i'll be good. i'll be.. quiet." his breathing is labored, his stomach already heaving. you haven't layed a finger on him.

"take your clothes off." he shudders but wastes no time, immediately tugging down his red shorts, along with his white tee, leaving him in his red boxers, a prominent bulge tenting the crotch.

"those too." you say sternly, lifting your shirt over your head and tugging down your shorts, leaving you in just your panties and bra, which are a matching cherry red.

he slips off his boxers, pooling at his ankles. his cock springs free, flushed tip dripping with precum, shaft throbbing, veiny, and thick. you lick your lips at the sight.

you climb over him, hovering above him, lips inches from his.

"now, chris. what made you think you could be begging me all day to fuck you? whinin' in my ear like a fuckin slut." you grumble.

he looks away with flushed cheeks, his eyes full of shame. you grab his chin, forcing him to look at you again.

"i'm sorry!" he splutters, avoiding eye contact. "i've just.. been so hard for you all day i.. i need you mama."

"so what is it that you want, chris?" you coo, biting back a mischievous grin.

"i- i want you to.. to make me cum. please. i'm.. it hurts ma. i'm so hard i need.. i need help." he pants.

"be careful what you wish for." you say with a grin, pressing your lips to his before crawling back down his body.

you stop once your mouth is level with his standing dick. you smile, getting on your knees between his already spread legs.

you wrap your hand around his base, kissing his tip with purposeful pressure. his head throws back.

"nnngghh-" he whimpers out. you grin, latching your lips around his pretty pink tip, never once looking away from his bright red face.

your tongue swirls clean and precise circles over his leaking tip, the beads of precum leaving a salty and enjoyable taste behind.

he's gasping for air, stomach already heaving, white-knuckling his bed sheets. he's biting his lip so hard you think it might bleed, trying desperately not to make a sound, since his brothers are home.

you pull off and his grip loosens on the sheets, stomach muscles relaxing. he looks back down at you with furrowed eyebrows. "why.. why'd you stop?"

you smile. "don't worry sweetheart. gimme just a sec." you coo. "just cover your eyes for me, baby."

he does just that, breath shaky. you open your nightstand drawer, pulling out a vibrator.

"keep your eyes shut honey." you coo. you carefully climb between his legs and to his standing dick, very carefully switching it onto the lowest setting, praying he doesn't hear it.

when he has no reaction, you press the round end of the vibrator to his tip. he lets out a strangled moan, moving his hands from his eyes to grip the bed sheets.

"i didn't tell you you could uncover your eyes, did i?" you whisper into his ear. his eyes are screwed shut from pleasure anyway, but he's still disobeying you.

"cover your eyes like i told you to. and don't move them unless i say." and with that, you turn the vibrator up to the highest setting, grab his base, and press it to his tip.

he lets out strangled moans, kicking his feet, curling his toes. his stomach caves in like a juice box that a little kid ran dry.

you can tell it's too much, but he never once complains. he doesn't trust his own voice right now. you swirl the vibrator around his head.

he gasps at the change in sensation. precum leaks down his buzzing shaft. suddenly, you get an idea. you turn the vibrator off, to which he whimpers and kicks his feet. you knew he was close.

you immediately drop down on him, taking him fully in your mouth. you swirl your tongue around him a few times, making him whimper and whine, eyes still covered.

you pull off just about an inch, switching on the vibrator. you hold it to the base of his cock, sending vibrations all throughout his dick.

you swallow around his now vibrating dick. he lets out uncontrollable whines, moans, whimpers and pleas. you continue to suck him off with the vibrator until he's rutting into your mouth.

once he's about to cum, you remove your mouth and vibrator. he cries out, whimpering. "n-no! wha-!? mama, please.. i- i was so good! i-" he begs.

"i know, baby. it's just not time for you to cum yet. you can open your eyes." he removes his hands from his face, revealing the tears of pleasure and frustration streaming out.

you grin. he looks pathetic. and that's exactly how you like him. you straddle him, hovering over him. you take his cock and pin it to his tummy, his underside facing you. you lick a stripe up his underside.

he lets out a gargled moan. you sit on his base, your lace covered cunt on top of the underside of his cock, pinning it to his tummy, tip sitting right above his belly button.

"wha.. w-what're you doin ma?" he asks timidly.

"whatever i want to. now sit back and feel." he nods. you start to grind your hips on him. he moans, eyes shutting and fingers gripping the sheets.

you run your hands all over his tummy. you've always loved his tummy. it's so fun to kiss, bite, suck, leave hickeys on.

you've also always loved that he doesn't have a literal six pack, the slight stomach pooch that he has makes you wet every time you look at it.

you start to rub circles over his tip. he ruts his hips up, this whole time letting out strangled whines and moans.

this goes on for a couple minutes before he screams suddenly. "m'gonna cum!" his eyes screw shut, back arching.

you begin to coo sweet nothings. "yeah? you gonna cum all over this pretty tummy of yours, your gonna cum all over yourself baby. yeahhhh, that's right." you hum softly, rubbing circles over his inflamed tip.

"nnnghh-!" and then he cums. his back arches as he cries out, his warm white seed shooting out all over his stomach. you drool at the sight, heat pooling in your core, wishing he'd came on your stomach instead.

"good boy.. look at you. all messy for me.. yeah.." you coo sweetly, still grinding on him, rubbing his tip.

"mmph- that's.. ma i'm done." he whispers, starting to get overstimulated. you grin.

"ohhh, baby. you thought you were done?" you chuckle, grabbing the vibrator.

-------------------------------------------------------------

author's note: hey yall! i haven't made a fic in a while so im a bit rusty, but i hope you guys enjoyed! love yall sm! with love, bows, and sturniolos. 💗🎀

@whore4mattsturniolo @evie-sturns @rysturns @sweetshuga @sturnsvelocity @emely9274

[t-a-a-1]

Dandelion

One-Shot 3K-Words

Summary: After confessing your love to Optimus and being rejected; he discovers how much you mean to him.

A/N: Lots of yearning. A little bit of jealousy. Somewhat suggestive content. Angst. Optimus desperately needs you and he is a bit horny on this so beware.

Dandelion

....

It has been three months since you confessed your love to the leader of the Autobots.

And three months since he rejected you. 

You knew it was going to be this way. You weren't angry even when deep down, you hoped he would feel the same.

Maybe it's the human nature to love the unloveable. But when you think about it, there wasn't a single thing you did not love about him.

"I am honored but-"

You raised your hands to stop him. No. You didn't want the "It's not you, it's me" talk. You didn't want it, nor needed it. To you, it's stupid because although he may say that, you know the truth. If you were someone else, maybe a Cybertronian, he could love you. 

You didn't want answers. You didn't want to hear him. He had rejected you and that's the end of it. You just wanted to be honest.

That's it.

You began to be more distant. You weren't angry. Things just feel awkward. It's not like you didn't want to continue being friends but that was not possible at the moment. Is it really a friendship if deep down you still hope that he will change his mind? Optimus didn't deserve that nor did you.

You stopped going to the base so often. One or twice a week at most. You continued talking to everyone as you usually do but with Optimus it's different. Now you only greet him not wanting to start a conversation. He doesn't seem to mind your change and although it hurt you to see his indifference, you knew it was for the best.

But ... he noticed.

....

"I'll be going on patrol duty."

Optimus looks around the base as he announces his departure. Bulkhead is with Miko practicing some boxing, Arcee is chatting with Jack while Bumblebee and Raf play video games. 

His optics fall on you. You were talking to Ratchet about something he couldn't decipher. Although his old friend was focused on his work, he still talked to you. You seemed content and wondered the reason behind your good mood. 

"(Y/N)," Optimus walks towards you and Ratchet, interrupting the conversation.

You stand on the elevation floor. Facing him face to faceplate. You were so small, yet he felt intimidated by you. 

"I'll be going on patrol," he repeats himself. Optimus doesn't know why but it has become complicated to talk to you.

"Yes umm, you already said that?"

You used to go on patrol duty with him. Usually, the nights will end with the two of you on the top of the base. With you smoking a cigarette and drinking a beer. Optimus would sometimes enjoy a barrel of oil with you. 

The two of you would talk for hours, sometimes it would last until the sunrise. 

"Do you wish to accompany me?"

That's what he wanted to ask. But nothing came out of his voice box. He stays quiet for a few seconds and leaves. 

....

Ratchet hears a heavy sigh coming from Optimu's vents.

A few seconds.

And another one.

And another.

And another.

And one more.

"Would you stop doing that?"

Ratchet looks at the Autobots' leader and Optimus has the audacity to look confused. This angered the doctor who was very well aware of the situation.

"If you miss (Y/N) so much why don't you talk to her?"

"I don't understand-"

"Ah! Tsk,Tsk," Ratchet raised both of his hands and moved them in front of him. He didn't want to hear any excuses coming from Optimus. "You know exactly what I am saying."

Optimus looks around to make sure no one is around. 

"(y/n) confessed... to have romantic feelings towards me."

For a very small second, Optimus regrets telling Ratchet the truth because the expression on his face isn't comforting.

"A human ... falling in love with a Cybertronian?" Ratchet questions, speaking to himself more than to Optimus. "Well, historically speaking, Cybertronians are not unfamiliar with inter-species relationships. But with a human ... this will be a first."

"I rejected her," Optimus says not feeling quite certain if he should have shared this with Ratchet. Not because he didn't trust him to keep a secret but because you trusted him not to tell anyone. "But now I am afraid that has severed the friendship we had."

"Have you tried talking to her?"

"I do not believe she wishes to speak to me."

Ratchet noticed the worriness in Optimus' faceplate. He knew things had been different between the two of you since months ago. At first, he thought it had been a fight. Something that could be fixed with a simple conversation. But it was more than that. Maybe it cannot be fixed.

"And you Optimus?" the doctor asked. "How do you feel?"

Optimus takes a few seconds to think. He breaks eye contact with Ratchet and looks at the ground. Optimus looks at his right servo, it's been a while since he has held your soft body. 

"I am ... quite saddened by her distance. I may not share the same feelings but I care for her deeply. More than I am willing to admit."

"And did you tell her this?"

"She wished for me to not speak of the matter again and I obliged," Optimus vents heavily again. "I did not want to give her any more pain."

"Processing pain is necessary to heal," Ratchet puts his left servo on Optimu's shoulder plate. "And you, old friend, you might have to learn that your friendship with her might not be the same ever again."

....

"Reporting to you live, (y/n), Jasper News."

He sees you more on TV now than in person. He has always been a fan of your work and how you are so passionate about telling the truth. 

Optimus turns off the TV from his private quarters and heads to the hangar. He finds you there. Not sparing him a glance but his optics were glued to you.

You wore a white long-sleeved button-up shirt with a black skirt that highlights your figure. Your hair was kept in place with a hair clip and you wore glasses. Black heels with pink cheeks and red lips. You had come out of work and came straight here. 

"Oh, Prime. Were you going on patrol duty?"

Were you actually talking to him? Why couldn't he talk? You were smiling at him and yet he couldn't say a word. His voice box may not be working because no matter how much he tries nothing would come out.

He nods.

"Can I come with you? It's been a while since we have ridden together."

Four months and 15 days to be exact. 

He couldn't say a word. And only nods again.

....

To say that he was nervous was an understatement. He could feel and see everything. 

Especially, the skin of your legs on his seat. Optimus was too distracted. So much so that he didn't notice the bump of the road. Casually, you were drinking water and as you were about to take a sip, the water came out from the bottle due to the commotion. Your white shirt became wet, making your black brassier visible to his eyes. 

"Shit. Prime, can you make your widows dark?"

You ask him, feeling uncomfortable at the wet fabric against your skin.

"Of course," Optimus didn't question why he just followed your orders. He darkened all of his windows even the front one. 

He didn't expect you to start undressing. Slowly unbuttoning your long-sleeved shirt. Revealing to him your black lace bra. Optimus honks out of nowhere, steam coming out of his pipe. 

"Are you alright?" You ask him as you put your shirt on top of his air ventilations, hoping your shirt could drive quickly so you could put it back on.

"My apologies, I just-" he is again without words and he made a mental note to tell Ratchet to check up on him "I ... Please can you put your shirt back on? I do not wish to disrespect you."

"What do you mean?" you ask him innocently. Until a stupid idea crossed your mind. "Wait, I thought human attraction was impossible for Cybertronians?"

Optimus keeps quiet and keeps driving.

"Prime ... Do you find me ... attractive?"

He can't answer. If he says yes, what would that imply? If he says no, would that hurt your feelings even more? More importantly, he doesn't know. The only thing he is aware of is that his spark is agitated. He vents air hotter than usual. He is driving faster, and his processor is unable to understand the speed limits.

"What am I saying? Of course, you don't."

Optimus couldn't understand how you could say that when his enstril could sense your perfume. Something new he had never smelled before. Exquisite, delicate and sweet. It's you, your natural smell. The type he can't get tired of.

No. He can't think like that. It's not possible. Something in his system must be wrong.

"I met someone at work."

He didn't like the sound of that.

"I didn't want to say anything until things were steady but I think they are now."

Optimus slows down. He hasn't talked to you for so long and expected this night to be one of those he used to enjoy. The nights in which you would talk about the stars and he would do nothing but listen. The nights in which you would talk about a book and he would ask you about your favorite character. 

The nights in which he could watch the whole universe in your eyes.

....

"The scans are all good, Optimus," Ratchet says. "No anomalies were found."

"Are you sure of these results?"

"Confident."

Ratchet studies his friend's faceplate. He is usually the quiet type. Much had changed about him through the years. But nothing can go unnoticed by him. He knew Orion Pax and most certainly, he knew Optimus Prime. 

"But if you tell me your concern, then maybe I can run a specific analysis."

"It's my spark."

"What?" 

Ratchet was perplexed, he was not expecting that.

"It's in pain," Optimus stands from the gigant medical bed and sits on it. "And my processor only recreates memories of (y/n)."

One second passes.

Then another.

And another.

And one more.

"I do not like to question the ability of your processor," Ratchet doesn't move, he only procures to look at his friend in the optics. "But have you thought that maybe your processor is thinking of (y/n) because she has sparked your software of ... attachment?"

Optimus doesn't say a word and this only confirms Ratchet's suspicions. He has noticed how Optimus has been more distracted. His optics ever so lightly brightened up whenever he heard your name. The longing in every heavy vent his friend would so as the minutes passed without talking to you.

"How do humans ... Show affection?"

Ratchet doesn't need answers. He already knows and he doesn't want to make Optimus feel bad for having emotions. He's actually glad to know that his friend is capable of feeling something at all. Even after everything he is been through.

"From what I've read, giving flowers is a common practice."

"Do you think if I give (y/n) flowers will my feelings be clear?"

Yet, he wonders if it's the right thing. Is this desperation for connection or does Optimus' spark really glow for you? Either or, he wasn't one to make a conclusion.

"I am not certain but I think it's a start."

....

Took longer this time for patrol duty. Making sure he looked everywhere. But being in Nevada's desert didn't help much. There were cacti and grass but nothing that he particularly liked for you.

Until he found something you might like. 

It was delicate, more so than you. It took him an extra hour to get back to base because he was driving slowly. He didn't want to cause the flower any harm, it had to be in perfect condition for it to be worthy of you.

When he finally reached the base, he even took look longer to transform back to his original size. Making sure that his mass-shift didn't disturb the flower. 

He walked to the hanger, with a single dandelion in right servo. It's so minuscule and nervousness starts to kick in his system.

Out of the many kinds of flowers there are on your planet, will you like this one? If you did, would you be kind enough to spare him a smile? Anything that could alleviate his suffering just a little?

He can't deny it. Not anymore. Your absence has devastated him. In ways he can't describe. There may be millions of languages on your planet but not a single one could ever describe the feeling of yearning he has. How can he explain something he has no words for? How can he explain that his spark cries your name and his body begs for your affection? How much he craves for your attention or to at least be worthy of it. May Primus forgive him but would he would throw away his honor if that meant you could take him as yours.

Will this single dandelion be enough to express that?

Optimus is delighted to see you here. His thoughts had gone insane thinking that you were waiting for him. 

Instead, he sees you on the elevation floor, arranging many flowers into a small little white base. There are many of them. Of all kinds of colors and shapes. Then he thought how stupid it was for him to think he was worth even a simple look from you. 

"Hey big guy, guess who got flowers today?" you were content. Looking so happy that his circuits might corrupt. He wanted to be that to you. He wants to be a reason for you to smile. Just him. "I thought I should come and put them in a place where everyone can appreciate them."

And suddenly he gets this strange urge. A dark thought of destroying that which you love, those flowers and especially whoever gave them to you. Because why? Why is it that those flowers can give much more happiness than him? What do they mean to you? Does the person who gave them to you love you more than him?

"Well, what do you think?"

He looks at the flowers once more. His dark thoughts quickly go away. 

He is reminded of the dandelion on his servo. 

You deserved more than this. 

"They are ... adequate."

.....

He doesn't know how long he has been staring at the dandelion. He has grown a hatred towards it. 

Optimus wants to let it go. For the wind to take it and for him to forget about it. Yet, he can't find the energy to do so.

"I am in love with you."

He re-played that scene again and again. Deep down a part of him wished he could go back in time and fix it. If he was sincere with his feelings from the beginning, would things be different?

Would you be with him now? Probably. You will be here, on top of the base and on this cold night, he will carry you close to his chassis. Close enough for you to feel the warmth of his spark. The heat intensifies as it only does when he is near you. 

You would tell him stories and he would listen. Looking at you from time to time because the stars above him did not compare to the beauty of the creature he was holding. 

"Prime?"

He stops daydreaming and finds you next to him. You take a seat, close to him. The vastness of the Nevada desert and the night sky were your view. 

"Are you alright?"

"I am."

He lied but it's not like he can say the truth. He can't tell you that his spark glows in pain for the so much yearning he has for you.

"I am sorry," you look into the distance, a part of you is ashamed and even afraid to look at him "I know I have been a little distant."

"I believe the word 'little' would be an understatement," his voice comes out as aggressive but the last thing he wants is to intimidate you. "But I cannot phantom myself putting any type of blame on you."

"I should have never confessed."

"No," his voice is softer now and he takes the time to look at you. Suppressing his need to hold you closer, he holds onto the dandelion instead, trying to get the courage he needs to give it to you. "I admire your honesty."

"Looking back at it, I am glad you rejected me," you put a string of your hair back on your ear. He knew this action of yours. You did that whenever you got shy and he wondered if he ever made you feel that way. 

"If you didn't I would have never met Alex and I wouldn't have been this happy."

Could you please end his misery? Could Primus be merciful and take his spark right at this moment? Because he can't do it. He can't. Not when he was asked you so many times to call him by his first name just for you to reject him.

Now, you found someone. Someone unknown to him with who you made a connection. A connection so strong that you deemed him honorable to be called by his first name by you.

"Is he ... Worthy of your affection?"

"Yes, I believe so."

But then again. He had his chance. He lost you and your friendship. Optimus knows that after tonight things will be different. As much as he wanted you, he knew you weren't his. Now, he feels stupid and ashamed for ever thinking the universe would be so kind as to gift you to him. 

"(Y/N)?" he calls your name so softly as if his voice box had glitched just for a small second. But you noticed. "Would you allow me to indulge myself in your company? Just this one time?"

There was nothing to say. You just nod.

Blissfully unaware of Optimus' sentiments. 

Unknown to you the dandelion, is still in his servo. 

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

A/n: The romance was extremely rushed because this is a draft of what's to come in my fanfic 'The Darkest Hour' Of course the story above was a very cramped version of it and everything will happen way more smoothly. I think this story was just points and ideas I want to implement later down the line but I am still not certain in what way I want to take the romance. So I made this to help out and decide what route to take. 

Not this one I think.

Anyway, I am sorry for any mistakes I made. I don't proofread. 

For any questions, comments, concerns, or requests, you may send me a message/ask on this account.

Thank you for reading!

....

Dandelion Prequel:

https://www.tumblr.com/t-a-a-1/769321108184891392/dandelion-prequel?source=share

[srslylini]

season 2 has a structure problem and that makes act 1 flow naturally enough and it sets up the next acts perfectly well, but they wanted to do so much more than what they were

1. setting up

2. capable of doing in 9 episodes

had they just cut a few plot lines everything would've moved far easier. For example

1. cut the Smeech thing entirely. Sevika and Jinx don't need this to find themselves together and start a found family. That scene In Silcos office was so moving and everything I always loved about Arcane, stuff like this is what's needed. In fact move the prison break to act 1 and have them handle that together, Jinx can still make Sevika her arm, and everything could've still moved the same. It would've fit so much better and there also would've been so much more time to develop anything else with the magic system and act 2 wouldn't feel like it was overflowing with anything and everything. Isha is a character that as of in the show can be cut so easily and that's so sad because she'd be so interesting. Everything about her would've worked and SHOULD HAVE worked but she also just felt like Plot and a thing to make Jinx sad over again. Either don't do that or make Isha not a character like this???? I liked her scenes with Jinx so much and the scene with Jinx freaking out after finding out that Isha was taken to prison was genuinely so good, I'm still holding on to the hope that they didn't actually kill her

2. either cut that shit with the tree because let's be so honest that basically only happened so that Heimerdinger, Ekko and Jayce could meet, since we do NOT even really talk about the tree in act 2? that was so weird. Like either actually make it a thing or find different ways to let characters meet naturally. I dont know, the show was so good with that in season 1. And if they truly wanted the tree scene at least make it make sense and don't randomly drop it Idk.

3. I LOVE Mel she is like my favorite character but the plot with the black rose takes so much necessary time away from what we actually need to focus on. I heard they want to make different shows so they are setting this up but it just doesn't work. Mel could've so easily been integrated into the main plot line and it would've also made so much more sense at that. Though I'll just wait on act 3 before I judge too hard. (if they actually DARE to make her pregnant Istg)

4. Making Jinx that hero character for only like, what, a few seconds was so strange. I hope act 3 gets that better but that, first of all, happened mostly out of no where and a few touches to her shoulder after the prison scene was also not??? helping??? either set that up from the very start or don't do it at all. She isn't a hero, she is a tragedy and someone who needs help and room to breathe. The scenes where they tried to make that funny, in my opinion didn't land at all. She doesn't need a hero complex she needs calmness and stable relationships. Let Isha live I swear to GOD.

in fact that leads me into the next point

5. Have Vi realize she doesn't want to be an enforcerer sooner? I actually do like how rushed that part felt don't get me wrong, but if they wanted a reunion between Jinx and Vi don't randomly put it into act 2 with barely any build up. Let Jinx and Vi realize it during the fight, they kinda did do that but??? just didn't move that anywhere. it's so strange. If they had cut the Smeech stuff they could've easily used the third episode to make Jinx and Vi slowly reconcile. Which also means I think Vi would've been such a better "symbol" than Jinx. Vi and Jinx, for me, show what Zaun is made of, and Jinx is quite literally the valid pain, distrust and anger of Zaun, and she as well as Zaun desperately need healing. Like that would've been SO COOL. that's just my opinion though, so there is that.

6. If they had made Vi the symbol the conflict between Caitlyn and Vi would've felt a lot more natural as well. Like??? Also Caitlyn should've had so much more time if they wanted that switch up in the end to work. Cut the black rose stuff and that would've worked perfectly fine.

7. Now do NOT get me wrong, Ambessa's character is so interesting and I feel like exploring her is so cool but she and her plot just doesn't fit into the Piltover/Zaun thing. It makes it too big for what the show is. In fact I (and now this is just my opinion, anyone can have their own just saying lmao) would've either cut out Ambessa's character/plotline or subtly continued Ambessas drama with Mel, which would give Mel, who didn't get taken by the black rose in my version, a lot more to do and way more interesting stuff too. Again this is very much my opinion and doesn't mean anyone needs to share it, but I feel like they could've easily made Heimerdinger be the one who gets Caitlyn to where she was/is with Ambessa. It would've expanded Heimerdingers character and it would've stayed in the setting they already perfectly build up, Piltover and Zaun. Also, Heimerdinger wouldn't just feel like a random joke character anymore.

8. The Pit fight stuff could have been SO interesting and I feel had we not stayed with Viktor Christ so much which was also so weird at times, we could've gotten so much necessary insight on Vi. If we follow my idea it could've been Vi forced to be a symbol because of the person she is. The embodiment of Zauns loyalty, strength and resilience. And then the fights that will come out of that forcing Vi to face so much stuff she shouldn't etc etc (I haven't fleshed that one out yet don't come for me) and that could've ended in her pit fighting era, which should've taken at LEAST an episode and not a random montage that just gets forgotten??? for no reason at all. Really hope act 3 talks about that cause??? I feel with Vi as the leader the healing of Zaun would make so much sense, because Jinx realistically can't do that. The idea of Jinx being in that position IS interesting I just feel it wasn't established/developed enough.

9. I really really liked how from the very beginning Viktor's safe haven did not in fact feel safe. There was always a very uneasy feeling and that's what I love about the show. I was always waiting for the shoe to drop and it happened, that was amazing. Though I would've either established a lot of this way earlier on in the show or made it not so, and now walk with me here Ik its magic, unrealistic. That does sound strange but having Viktor suddenly float in space with white silver flowing hair and his dead assistent next to him was... very very out of no where. It was like a lazy show trying to get away with "yeah well it's magic so of course this works" and I hate that because even magic needs explanation and build up. So yeah. Either cut that shit out or have it established sooner. And while seeing the one person who helped Jayce as a kid did kind of help, it still wasn't enough for THIS, though again MY OPINION. Also we spent way too much time there, it was getting ridiculous. So much time could've easily been lent to stuff that actually needed it. I actually laughed out loud when Viktor started the healing process with Vander because come ON now, and I do not think they wanted me to laugh.

10. The stuff with Vander, Silco and Felicia (while cute) was unnecessary and weird. What I liked the most about Vander taking in Vi and Powder was the feeling that he didn't do it because he necessarily knew them very well but because he knew their mom was dead (that did show he and their mother did kind of know each other but so do like all the people in the lanes that is kind of established) and wanted to PROTECT. This new context sadly makes it feel like "well of course he stopped everything and took them with them and cared for them he knew them since birth, duh" when I always wanted to feel "well Vander is in his heart a good man who saw what terrible stuff this war and fighting did and then took in orphaned children because of course he would do that" if that makes sense? I feel this new thing took away so much from Vander, but again that's maybe just me.

11. So many jokes and scenes didn't land with me. The scene with Jinx trying to show Sevika her middle finger was SO GOOD and so Arcane that seeing the scene were they try to make it funny with Jinx's trousers and that enforcerer felt so out of place? Like what. That scene could have EASILY been cut and nothing would have changed at all. And that's what is the worst because there isn't one scene in season 1 that I feel could've been cut and there are so many of them in season 2.

12. Introducing Maddie in act 1 made me believe she'd be a bigger, even more of a threat to Zaun, character than she was and that's so sad. What I loved about season 1 is that every single character mattered. Even those we saw maybe once. This time around I hardly cared at all for any new character because they didn't feel like a Person anymore, they just felt like Plot. In season 1 episode 1 there is this scene, the first scene Vander gets to speak in. The only reason Huck meets the woman and the man to trait was basically so we get to know how the undercity works and establish Vander as basically its leader and protecter; The one people are loyal to etc. But it doesn't feel that way. It's something that naturally happens and every character in that scene, even the man and the woman we never see again, mattered and felt real.

yeah so those were really just my thoughts. I could very much go on but I also don't want to.

[ssentimentals]

come and get your love {kim mingyu}

pairing: kim mingyu x fem!reader

prompt: arranged marriage! AU, in which mingyu is a popular dj and fem!reader is a famous news reporter. it gets worse before it gets better.

warnings: none! it's not the usual sweet/fluffy stuff everyone is used from me though.

one.

mingyu stares at the window and wonders if he's ever heard of someone jumping out from the sixth floor. surely someone did, right? and they probably stayed alive, right?

'focus.' wonwoo hisses next to him, jamming his elbow hard to mingyu's right side.

mingyu blinks back to the present, looking at the contract in front of him. his sign looks almost foreign on it and to be honest the more he looks at it, the more this whole 'jumping out of the window on sixth floor' idea starts looking great. mingyu turns his head and his gaze lands on you. the only person here with who he's unfamiliar and isn't this ironic? how most unfamiliar person for him in this room is about to become the closest person to him in his life?

'thank you.' your voice is clear and you even muster a smile to the lawyer. a fake one, but still a smile. 'can we get going now?'

'where are hurrying, oh the love of my life?' mingyu asks, raising his voice to sound more dramatic. 'my legal wife, my petal-' wonwoo elbows him hard but mingyu keeps going. 'don't you want to get to know your husband more?'

mingyu waits with baiting breath for your reaction. it's a test from him, sort of. depending on how you'll react he is going to correct his behavior later on. your eyes bore into him with no emotion, nothing on your face betrays how you're feeling. staring at him for few seconds, you simply stand up and walk away, not gracing him with any kind of reply. wonwoo sighs like he's dying next to him but mingyu pays him no mind; he saw your eyes and despite how well you tried to hid it, he saw it - emotion. and he is going to see it again.

two.

'is that wall really that more interesting than me?' mingyu asks, turning towards you. 'it can't be.'

he watches as you slowly turn, facing him. it's been a week since he last saw you and now that you two are back together for fittings, he can't help it. mingyu is not sure what's wrong with him but something about you makes him itchy. he wants to poke you, annoy you, ask you questions, talk to you - anything to get your attention. and when he has it now in form of your raised eyebrow, he can't help but grin. 'so. anything you want to ask from me, my wife?'

your lips twitch and he spent too much time with wonwoo to be able to recognize when someone is trying to hide a smile - it's exactly what you're doing right now. he probs even further: 'i wonder if you're one of those sirens. do you think your voice will lure me in and that's why you're staying silent?'

you uncross your legs and his eyes zero on that motion, focusing a bit too hard on how pretty and long they are. how good they look in those black straight jeans. how nicely they'd look wrapped around-

'it is,' you say, voice not as cold as last time but still rather emotionless. 'the wall, i mean. it is more interesting than you.'

mingyu fakes a gasp, clutching at his chest in an horribly outstaged offence. 'i'll have you know, i'm plenty interesting.' there's a smirk in the corner of your lips and it's such a sexy look on you that mingyu gets thrown off for a second. 'c'mon, ask me something.'

you sigh like he's the biggest annoyance in your life but mingyu sees the way you're biting your inner cheek in order not to smile and he's winning. he's so, so winning. 'mingyu,' you start and he likes the way you say his name. 'are you very upset that there'll be no more parties on ibiza with some hot models for you? now, that you have a wife?'

mingyu blinks. icy chills run down his spine and it's a struggle to keep his expression neutral. 'keeping tabs on me, wifey?' he asks, going for lighthearted but he's too tense to make it look natural.

you roll your eyes, huffing. 'no need to, you're doing a great job by being on every single news portal yourself.'

and it's true, that's the thing. mingyu is a popular dj, of course he's where the party is and yes, in the nice company of pretty people most of the time. but the way you said it - like he's some dirt on your shoes, like you think his whole life is only this, like you know him already when you don't know a damn thing about him - makes him angry. livid, even. he should say something back, something equally bad, but then designer walks in and you two are picture perfect couple again. mingyu kind of hates it. he also hates how he can't even hide the awe in his eyes when you walk out in a white dress, looking stunning.

three.

thunder rolls in with all its might, showing exactly why all flights are cancelled. mingyu watches how mother nature reminds everyone who's actually in charge here, while you're busy stressing out at the background. he turns, focusing on the way you zip and then unzip your bag, grabbing laptop from it with a big sigh. before he can even think it through, question is out of his mouth: 'how can i help you?'

you freeze. you look shocked when you turn to him and he doesn't blame you - it's weird to ask that when both of you are not speaking terms exactly. 'what?' you ask, stuttering a bit. it's kinda cute. 'you want to help me?' mingyu nods. 'why?'

god, you really never want to make anything easy for him, do you? 'because maybe i'm not an asshole you think i am?' mingyu tries but you don't budge. 'fuck, okay. is this how our marriage-'

'fake marriage,' you but in.

'fake marriage is going to be?' mingyu asks. 'we will not talk to each other and you will react like i'm trying to poison you every time i bring you tea? aren't you tired of this?' mingyu moves closer to you. in this huge hotel room you look so small, especially when you wrap arms around yourself like you're doing now. 'our flight got cancelled, but you're stressing out here like our wedding did. i asked a simple question and you're acting like-' he throws his hands in the air, loss of words. you stare back at him, guarded and he suddenly wants to give up. 'actually, nevermind. i'm going to take next room, text me if there'll be any updates about flights.'

mingyu is.. emotionally drained. whenever he tried to take steps towards you all he was met with was a concrete wall. he knows your first meeting could've gone better but the way you're shutting him down is brutal. he grabs his bag and moves to another room, when you softly call out his name. and maybe he shouldn't give in so easily, but it's you and he's ready for anything to get you to talk to him.

'i'm sorry,' you mumble quietly, looking up and meeting his gaze. 'i just- flight is cancelled and we will be late for all our appereances tomorrow and people will be angry-'

'they all will wait,' mingyu interrupts. is this what got you so stressed? you thinking that some people will be angry at you? mingyu instantly despises this idea, you thinking that some people have this power over you. 'they will wait however the fuck they need to wait for us, okay?' a suspicion creeps in his mind. 'did someone say something to you?' the way your eyes widen is an answer enough. 'who?' mingyu asks, raising his voice a little. 'tell me who.'

his voice and tone is firm enough for you to just give him your phone with a message thread with one of the directors of tv channel open. mingyu reads through the messages and grits his teeth so hard, his jaw clicks. 'let me talk to him,' he looks back at you, pleading for you to give permission. 'please. no one should ever talk to you in this way. let me talk to him and i will remind him his place.'

mingyu probably looks very scary right now, but he doesn't care; how dare someone speak to you like that? how dare someone make you this stressed? you nod and mingyu quickly goes to get his phone, typing number of that director. he walks out to call him without noticing sincere small smile playing on your face.

four.

it goes better after that. you two are talking and it's a big win for mingyu. one week full of tv appereances and interview recordings flies in a blink of an eye with your company, especially when you open up to him more and more. mingyu thinks marrying someone who is this smart and funny is not the worst thing in the world.

five.

two weeks till the wedding and mingyu takes you out on your first real date. or well, you don't know yet that this is a date but he's about to drop that bomb soon. the restaraunt is nicely lit, food is delicious and the way candle lights dance on a naked skin of your shoulders in this dress makes him a bit dizzy.

'is this a date?' you ask, looking up at him when waiter brings dessert.

mingyu likes having your eyes on him. he always wanted your attention and now that he has it, he never wants to lose it. he reaches out for your hand, smiling when you let him interlace your fingers together. 'yes, for me. i'd love it if you'll treat it as one, too.'

your eyes are mesmerizing. how mingyu is supposed to concentrate on anything else when you're looking at him like that? your thumb gently caresses his skin. 'it's a date for me too.'

six.

it's all very new. mingyu is not in a rush but he really doesn't want the first time he kisses you to be the wedding so yeah, maybe he is in a rush. it's not like you're complaining though.

'easy there, cowboy,' you giggle, when he pushes you against the door of his bentley. 'what's got you so worked up?'

'you in this dress,' mingyu mutters, leaving small kisses on your neck. 'you dancing to my dj sets. you being next to me. you, just you.' mingyu stops right in front of your lips, practically vibrating with need to learn your taste. 'let me. fuck, please let me, i-'

you kiss him first. and it's everything he thought it'd be and then some more. mingyu kisses back, devours you whole against that car and leaves a stinging bite on your lower lip when he finally pulls back. he brings your foreheads together, breathing heavily. 'we could've been doing this from the start if you didn't act like you had a stick up your ass.'

'fucker,' you mutter, slapping his bicep but with no real heat behind it. 'get off me.' you push him gently and when mingyu steps away, you smile. three days till the wedding and mingyu already is not sure how he's going to survive them without your kisses. 'thanks for the night, mingyu. you were amazing up there.'

mingyu preens, something warm fills his body at your praise of his skills. he knows he's a damn good dj but hearing this from you means so much more. 'i'll see you tomorrow?' he asks, smiling.

you burst out laughing. 'yes, mingyu, i'm not going to skip my own wedding.'

mingyu grins, not wanting to admit how relieved he is to hear this. 'just checking.'

seven.

true to your word, you don't skip the wedding. you are there, looking like an angel in the white dress, making mingyu's heart want to jump out of his ribcage. you kiss sweetly by the applause from everyone and mingyu holds you tight during your first dance.

'forever with me, aren't you excited?' mingyu asks, gently swaying you.

'two years by the contract don't sound like forever,' you say, grinning. 'getting a bit ahead of yourself, mister.'

'what can i say, i'm very confident.' mingyu spins you once, twice and then pushes you back into his arms, right where you belong. 'your heart eyes are giving you away, by the way.'

your laugh is quickly becoming his favorite sound. he smiles too at your giggles. 'you're not exactly being subtle either,' you say playfully. 'happy that you got me in the end, mingyu?'

mingyu leans in, capturing your smile in a sweet kiss. cameras are going crazy and people around are clapping, thinking that it's all fake but it's the single most real thing in his life. 'you have no idea how.'

a/n: this was a request from anon like month ago and i got around it only now, i'm sorry :( hopefully whoever requested this is happy with how it turned out, cause i kinda like it <3 - nini

my other seventeen works are here

my formula 1 works are here

[midnightshindig]

what if cecil’s spouse was one of the guardians omniman killed in the first episode 👀

Cecil x OgGotG!Reader

Damn we all need some therapy, huh?

I've been getting a lot of angst requests and if you requested angst, and I haven't done it yet- especially if it's a Viltrumite reader, it's mostly because I'm mentally quite soft and it takes a lot more out of me to write good angst than good smut or fluff

Don't let this make anyone feel bad or stop requesting, I love it, but I just wanna be transparent about my process

You guys are amazing at requests though I eat this shit up EVERY time

Fic below the cut!!

I'll be honest idrk how to format this

Cecil and you are married in secret due to your status as a Guardian of the Globe

and it actually works out quite well

He's able to trust you to not die, and he's not constantly anxious you're going to get murked in battle

your power is super healing, like on some Deadpool type shit it should be virtually impossible to kill yo-

what the fuck.

Cecil and Donald arrive on scene at GHQ and there's blood everywhere.

Literally.

Everywhere.

Now Cecil is a tough man, he's been through stuff that would make the average person lose touch with reality

But this makes him almost throw up.

By far the worst part is that he can tell which blood Is yours because it's actively bubbling and trying to pull itself back together

The rescue team is trying to scoop you into a pile so you can reform, but there just isn't enough of you

Just blended and mashed guts and viscera, like your insides had been slushies before you'd died, and you'd been torn to shreds

but your blood was bubbling

could you even really die? Could you feel this? Could you think? What was Cecil going to do?

He watched you struggle to come back, and after THE IMMORTAL couldn't be resuscitated, he knew it was over

Your blood levelled and there was no effort to reform

maybe you'd finally died, perhaps you'd just given up

He didn't know.

He's pissy when he gets home, he can't cry, he's not sure he physically can

He wants to, but he's alone now, in his house, there's nothing stopping him

but he can't.

He looks at your wedding photos on the mantle, and down to the band on his hand

The cleanup team leaves yours in a box on his desk the next day

and he sobs.

He sobs so hard and so violently Donald clears the room, before excusing himself.

He hasn't cried since he took his job the GPA, this is decades' worth of tears just built up and pouring out of him as he clutches your ring to his chest

His was a black tungsten band, yours the very same band with Lonsdaleite set in. The two strongest materials available to him so you could wear it in battle.

He remembers asking you to marry him, and sobs harder

The two of you are on the beach, a ridiculous venture to get Cecil over his distaste for it. He's younger then, shortly after accepting his position at the GPA

"Y'know-" you start, adjusting your sunhat as he grimaces on the towel laid out for him, under a large umbrella "I don't understand how you can hate the beach, it's so cheery!"

"You get sand in your ass and the water is polluted, there are screaming children everywhere and this beach allows dogs."

You roll your eyes, leaning over to kiss the top of his head before standing back up

"Well I'm going into the water, you don't hate me, do you?"

"No, of course not. I know what you're doing, Y/n, it won't work."

"Noooooo, of course not" You wink at him, leaving him under his umbrella as you head into the water.

Ah hell.

He adjusts so that the ring box in his pocket isn't so obvious

This should go well. This has to go well.

You're at the beach until sunset, when Cecil is so anxious he springs into action without any thought

He doesn't have a speech prepared

He doesn't have anything prepared except the ring in his pocket

but fuck, it's so picturesque.

"Y/n- Y/n get out of the water!" He calls to you, but you just stick a tongue out at him

"If you wanna talk to me you have to get in!"

He can't believe you're doing this to him- or rather, he's marrying you because you do this to him.

And so Cecil plunges into the water, all the way up to his hips in it before he reaches you

You smile wide at him "Ahh you got in!! What's up?"

The wind blows the hat off your head as Cecil pulls out his ring, unable to kneel due to the water

"Will you marry me?"

"..."

"...??????" He's stressing out

"...!!" You're estatic

You tackle him into a hug, plummeting you both into the water

so much for not getting his hair wet

"Oh Cecil- this ring is beautiful!"

"Haha- I know, and it's resilient too, you can wear it while fighting..."

"and never take it off..." He finishes to himself, wiping the tears from his eyes and hoisting himself up, braced against the desk in front of him.

"Ugh... that's embarrassing. I can't believe it." He tries to put back on the tough guy act, but there's a pain in his heart and in his gut and everywhere. It hurts everywhere.

This is when Donald pokes his head back in with a box of tissues and a warm beverage

He doesn't say anything, just brings it over and sits in the desk chair next to where Cecil is holding himself up

After a long silence, Cecil nods at him, taking a drink from the mug

It isn't better, but it helps.

[justtheclippy]

Tips and FAQ for Asks

Hello beautiful humans, I want to do my best to get to everyone's asks so here are a few things you can do to help make that happen! (if you're looking for the cast stream master list, skip to the bottom)

Please don't spam the same question repeatedly. I will get to you eventually, I promise! But when you submit the exact same thing multiple times, it just slows me down. I've got one single brain cell, please have mercy.

No spoiler requests. I cannot tell you anything about future episodes, when they will come out, what will happen to certain characters, how the story ends etc. We're limited on what we can say in general until more episodes release. The entire cast has signed NDAs (non disclosure agreement) preventing us from revealing anything, but more than that, we wouldn't want to ruin your experience of watching and engaging with the show organically! Trust me, just enjoy the ride, it's better that way.

Don't take anything too seriously. Please keep in mind most of these answers will just be for fun. My thoughts and opinions on the character, both for silly things like favorite dessert and more serious things like character analysis, are not hard and fast canon. Same goes for any of the actors. We can speculate about our characters, we know and understand them well, but when in doubt, assume its allllllllllllll non-canonical haha

Read through previous asks. This will help prevent asking things I've already answered. I'm going to be tagging (i swear I'll do it fr) my answers with #amanda asks and #tadc asks so you can find them more easily. If you do ask a question I've already answered IT'S OK DON'T PANIC I won't be upset haha

Even though I'll be tagging my answers so you can easily find them, here are a few frequently asked questions just to get them out of the way. If you decide to ask me something I've already answered, or something that goes against the guidelines above, I'll probably skip it, you silly geese.

Q: I've seen people use several different pronouns for you, what are your preferred pronouns? A: They/them and I prefer masc leaning terms generally! I'm queer, NB and very open about my identity. But people will sometimes use she/her because they don't know. I will never get upset with someone for not knowing- it's ok. But now that you've read this, you know! So you can go forth educated. You're welcome to correct anyone who doesn't know, but please be kind to each other. We've all been the person who didn't know before.

Q: What do you think of X ship? A: I love and support all the ships! Ships are part of a healthy fandom, keep creating content that makes you feel seen and that YOU want to see, that's the foundation of creativity. And if anyone disagrees with you, remind them that a lot of classics are just fanfiction about the gods at the time. It's always been here.

Q: What is your favorite ship? A: Bunnydoll and Buttonblossom, because the dynamics are so much fun.

Q: Do you like X AU? A: Yes. It doesn't matter what it is, yes. I love the AUs and if it's a new one, you better include a link so I can find it. I want all of them, thank you so muuuuuuuuch~

Q: Have you seen or played X game/show/movie/meme etc.? A: Always happy to chat about other media! But if you wanna ask about something specific, please include a link or explanation because lets be just so very honest, half the time my brain is off in adhd land so there's a good chance I'll have no idea what you're talking about at first.

Q: Have you watched Raggedy Ann & Andy: A Musical Adventure? A: Not yet! But due to VERY POPULAR REQUEST I will be putting together a watch stream to watch it live with yall. Once that's happened, I'll put the link here.

Q: Have you seen Queen's second game and will you be playing it? A: Yes, we've all seen the trailer and we're very excited! We will be playing it as a full cast, just like last time, as soon as the game is finished. For now, please go enjoy the demo and support the team! Once it's out and we're ready to stream it, I'll post the link here.

Q: Can you come to X convention? A: I will come to any convention that yall want to see me at!

BUT

In order for that to happen, you have to request me directly with the convention. Most will have either a request form on their site or a specific email for requests. Just write in that you would like to see me at their event, and then they will get in touch with my agent to book me!

Q: Can I request a song for you to sing? A: Of course! I promise yall I'll do my best to put out more songs this year. If there's a cover you want me to consider doing, or an artist/composer you'd like to hear me work with, let me know!

Outside of that, if you just want a little clip, you can drop requests in the asks and if I know the song I might record a bit. This is COMPLETELY dependent on time, especially if I'm busy. Please understand ❤️

You can also make requests during stream signings, which is easier to accommodate in the moment. Just put the request in the order notes, and I'll sing a little bit for you while I sign IF I know the song. So choose wisely.

Q: I want to be a voice actor! How do I get started? A: The best advice I can give on this subject is to

Join the Voice Acting Club Discord

It is one of the best resources available for anyone interested in getting started. Tons of articles and information on equipment, treating your space, what demos are and how to know when you're ready for one, tips on auditioning, workshops and classes, Q&As with industry professionals, plus casting calls.

Q: Can I write an ask just to show you cool stuff or tell you you're awesome? A: Of course you can! You can also tag me in stuff, that's ok too. I appreciate all the love and support yall have shown for me, Ragatha and the show in general. Yall are truly incredible. ❤️

Q: Do you have a PO Box so we can send you stuff? A: I'm setting it up THIS WEEK. I will post it here when it's ready.

Q: Where can I find X stream that the cast did? A: Moving forward, I will keep a master list of our group streams in order of date aired, to the best of my ability. If I miss one, let me know and I'll get it on here!

Saberspark TADC Cast Interview

Streamily Signing #1 (Amanda, Michael, Alex, Marissa)

Streamily Signing #2 (Amanda and Michael)

Streamily Signing #3 (Amanda and Sean)

Streamily Signing #4 (Amanda, Sean, Alex, Michael, Marissa, Vera, Hamish)

TADC Fan Game Stream: Game 1

Streamily Signing #5 (Amanda, Alex, Ashley, Sean, Michael, Marissa, Vera, Hamish, Wiz)

Fast Food Simulator Charity Stream (Amanda, Lizzie, Marissa, Michael, Ashley)

Marissa's Streamily Signing CRASHED by Amanda, Alex, Michael, Max (RU Caine/Jax), Julian (DE Jax), Adam (NL Jax), and Philip (NL Chad/Max)

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Epic Buddie Fic Rec | February 17th-23rd 2025

I got braces put in last week - for the second time in my life mind you! - so it's been a pretty miserable week for me 🙃 so I started a 9-1-1 rewatch to cheer me up 😄 (and because I'm in 9-1-1 withdrawal, only 10 days to go!!!!)

I also want to rec a 9-1-1 rewatch podcast I've been listening to, Tales From the 118! They don't have a tumblr so I'll just link to their first episode. I've really been enjoying it!

Complete

love bite by Tizniz/ @tizniz (Werewolf Eddie, Established Buddie | 1,8K | Mature):

“It’s okay, Eddie.” Buck soothes, “This is okay. You’re allowed to give into these instincts. There’s nothing wrong with it. You can bite me all over if you want.”

just hold on until the sun comes up tomorrow by thelikesofus/ @thelikesofus (Post-S4E14: Survivors | 2K | Teen):

“Buck,” Eddie says Buck’s name like a promise, like a prayer. “You're having nightmares and I'm not sleeping. If we're both going to be awake all night we might as well be awake together.” OR Why should either of them have to face the darkness alone when they have each other?

Love Language by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S8A, Getting Together | 4K | Teen):

When Eddie reluctantly reveals he can speak Swedish, Buck ends up learning a lot more about him than he bargained for.

i wanna feel you from the inside by shortndiaz (Vampire Buck, PWP, S3 | 4K | Explicit):

Starts with ‘wanna go for the title?’ and ends in some blood and sex

Eddie 2.0 by bellabrady (Eddie Moves to Texas | 5K | Not Rated):

Or: After Eddie moves to Texas, Buck adopts a stray cat and names it Eddie.

🔥 The Great Valentine's Day Debacle of 2025 by giselleslash/ @gigi-gigi (Valentine's Day, Getting Together | 5K | General):

Eddie books a couples Valentine’s Day weekend for him and Buck. Except they’re not together. Eddie is an idiot.

tell me that you'll never let me go by farfromthstars/ @farfromthstars (Eddie Goes To Texas, Getting Together | 5K | Teen):

From the apartment, he calls Buck, who picks up after two rings. “Hey, did you make it okay?” Eddie leans back against the pillows on his bed and closes his eyes, wishing he was at home on his couch with Buck next to him. Or that Buck was here with him, at least. “Yeah, just got back from my parents’, actually.” “How’d it go?” Buck asks. His voice is warm, even through the phone. “Did Chris talk to you?” “A little bit,” Eddie says, and allows himself a smile. “Buck, he– he hugged me and told me he missed me. Of course, then he remembered that he was mad at me, but for a minute–” “That’s– that’s awesome, Eddie,” Buck says. “Hey, uh, I gotta run, but keep me posted, okay?” “Sure,” Eddie says, confused at being cut off so quickly. “What are you d–” But Buck has hung up already. ~ Eddie goes to Texas. Buck is being weird. It only takes them both five days to crack.

this life that we make by farfromthstars/ @doeeyeseddie (Post-S8E8: Wannabes | 5K | Teen):

Eddie stares at his bottle of beer and grits his teeth. He has to go, he knows it’s the right thing. He’s going to go. Why does he want Buck to ask him to stay so badly? “Why did you never ask me to stay?” Buck makes a sound, a mix of a hiss and a hiccup, and when Eddie turns to look at him, he suddenly looks as if he’s in pain. “Eddie, I–,” Buck rubs his hands on his thighs. “Did you want me to?” “I want you to be honest with me,” Eddie says. “And I guess I hope you’re not actually this…unbothered by my leaving.”

🔥TRUST! by pairofraggedclaws (PWP, Quarantine | 8K | Explicit):

“I get used to it, I guess. Kind of. After a while,” Eddie says. Then, very quietly, “I’m just, uh, sensitive.” “Oh,” Buck says. Eddie's just sensitive. Eddie, his best friend, who he has now seen when he comes. Who comes in under a minute if he isn’t getting some on the regs. This is – this is – interesting. * Love and premature ejaculation.

Good Job! by pretty_boy_buckley (Post-S8A, Getting Together | 8K | Mature):

Buck begins giving Eddie little star stickers to encourage him, Eddie really loves them

I don't wanna miss you like this by rainbow_nerds/ @rainbow-nerdss (Eddie Moves To Texas, Love Letters | 9K | Teen):

Once he was home—or, as Chris puts it, back in his stupid, shitty apartment, he sat down, poured himself a drink—then another, once he downed the first—took out his laptop, and started to type. It was surprisingly easy, once the alcohol hit his bloodstream, to write it out. To put himself in the mindset of someone who loved Buck and couldn’t keep it inside anymore. Eddie Diaz was living in El Paso—miles away from his best friend who needed him, struggling to cross the invisible distance his son was keeping from him. There was no quick fix for either—but he was working on it. And in the meantime, he could do something to help Buck feel better from afar.

I lose my feet in my father's shoes by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S8A, Chris Coming Home | 12K | Teen):

Just as Eddie is planning to move to El Paso, Chris gets into a fight at school, and Helena and Ramon decide they've had enough, sending Chris home.

The Pieces of You (I Carry With Me) by Kwills91/ @kwills91 (Post-S8E8: Wannabes, Getting Together | 12K | Teen):

Eddie makes Buck a baby box and chickens out of giving it to him, leaving it in his closet for years and trying his hardest to forget about it, and what it might mean. Until Buck is helping Eddie pack for his move to El Paso and happens to find it.

disappearing into the distance by bucksclipboard/ @endofthedaymp3 (Eddie Comes Back From Texas, Getting Together | 16K | Teen):

Eddie wasn’t sure why he and Maddie weren’t close. It was strange, considering her little brother was the most important person in his life. Still, when the door opened, tight hugs were exchanged and cheerful welcome homes rang in his ears. “Does Bobby know? I gotta call Bobby!”, Chimney yelled. “Could you wait a minute?”, Eddie interjected. His eyes darted between them for a moment and landed on Chim, deciding he was his best bet. “Maybe first explain to me why I went to see Buck and his loft was empty. Am I missing something? Did he move?” or: eddie comes back from texas – only to find that buck has left los angeles

WIP

🔥 Gentle On My Mind by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, Shannon Lives, Buck/Eddie/Shannon | 16/? | 96K | Explicit):

In which Shannon lives, tells a lie, and sends hers, Eddie's, and Buck's lives down a very different path

🔥 Doe & a Drop of Golden Sun by ohstars/ @oh-stars (Canon Divergent, Dad Buck | 13? | 58K | Teen):

Buck doesn't mean to keep secrets from everyone, but he also can't talk about the pain he experiences on a day to day basis. With his nine-year-old living across the country and his custody limited to one monthly visit, Buck doesn't know how to share this part of himself. How does he tell his team of six years that he's had a kid this whole time? How does he tell his sister? How does he tell his Edd-- best friend? It's fine. The universe isn't going to give him a choice in the matter when the worst thing imaginable becomes his reality.

Podfic

🔥 [Podfic] Paralytic Narcolepsy Guy Hates Buckley & Diaz by oRóisín (oKathleen) // fic by eightpackdiaz (Outsider POV, Canon, Getting Together | 30-45min | Teen):

Paralytic Narcolepsy Guy is forced to listen to Buckley and Diaz talk to and about each other in his unconscious presence over the years. He insists he fucking hates them. But then he also accidentally helps them get engaged.

[shipmansflannels]

"who asked first" with the yellowjackets

yay! I'm back! the decision to open a new blog just for yellowjackets wasn't easy at all, but since it's been a year since this obsession has barely gone away and I already had an extremely confusing blog with layouts and the like, I wanted to start over with this one. hope you like it. I'll make a very simple and small prompt first, and then I'll make the masterlist and the oneshots/fanfics. stay tuned! sorry for any grammatical or coherence errors, english is not my first language and I'm trying to improve!

--------

who asked first with the yellowjackets girls...

jackie taylor.

well, if we're going to be honest here, you definitely asked first.

of course, jackie had already been rehearsing for weeks how he would ask you out. but she's obviously a girlfaillure, so you definitely asked first.

it was probably when she least expected it. it could be at soccer practice, or when you were coming home from school together and you had the audacity to ask her to go out with her to some hypothetical and boring place in the middle of the street… whatever.

all I know is that this little loser was eager for you to ask, and she definitely rolled out the classic, "took you too long…"

shauna shipman.

again, you asked first.

shauna doesn't have the social tact to ask you out (she's just like me), and drunk is even worse, so you actually had to make the first move most of the time.

just like jackie, it could have been when she was at soccer practice, or when she was alone enough to vent to her journal and you were able to get close to her without scaring her. anyway, the thing is, shauna was already secretly expecting this to happen (a lot of her journal pages were about you btw), so it wasn't a surprise either when you asked her out.

despite everything, you didn't have any difficulties on your first date. she's pleasant company, I suppose.

natalie scatorccio.

one of the rare exceptions where she asked first.

okay, don't be fooled, either. natalie is very cocky from time to time, but asking to go out with you is definitely one of the times she tends to weaken. so, kevyn probably dared her to do it and she just took advantage of her cooler personality to use it on you.

but that doesn't mean it's a bad thing. in fact, it's kind of a good thing (and probably depressing for her) because she only felt like herself when she asked you. I see in nat a huge tendency to ignore some of her feelings, especially when it comes to people she likes.

the invitation was probably also full of teasing on her part, from body language to the words used for it. and somehow she made it look cool and convinced you to accept it.

things that only natalie scatorccio could do.

lottie matthews.

for some reason, I'm 100% sure you asked first.

I know many of us think of lottie as a completely carefree, liberal and often bitchy enough person to ask someone out on a date. but, if we count the pre-crash, I think she was a very insecure person and uncertain of her feelings, more due to the influence of the pills.

so, as incredible as it sounds, you asked first. it was in an extremely relaxed conversation between you that the invitation ended up unintentionally, and she was visibly panicked when she agreed.

lottie is probably the type of person who has a rehearsed speech in front of the mirror while getting ready, and with her enviable style and expensive clothes (some stolen), she would do anything to make your date the perfect date.

taissa turner.

she asked first.

taissa is confident enough to ask you out, I have no doubt about that. but she definitely spent weeks planning the perfect invitation, just in case everything went wrong and she needed to run (just like what happened when she thought about breaking allie's leg before nationals).

anyway, taissa would certainly ask first and it would be quite a surprise for you. taking into account that, from the moment you accepted, you would discover that van also knew about her friend's ideas, and later that half of the team also knew. it would be a shock because you wouldn't understand tai's intentions at first.

but none of them are necessarily bad. one, is that tai was really excited if you accepted, and her anxiety couldn't stop her from wanting to tell the world. two, because she was overly excited that you had agreed to go out with her, and wanted the world to know it as well.

van palmer.

as much as I would really like to prove otherwise, you asked first.

van has the same problem as lottie, but in her case, it's excessively because of the sarcasm jokes and high charisma. she thinks she's being too much for you and that asking for something like that on this level would end up scaring you away.

in the end, it's totally the opposite, but it's going to take van a long time to figure that out, specifically. the invitation would happen when she least expected it, probably when you were feeling confident enough to pass notes to her during classes.

it's a cute invitation, and one that van would hold in question for a long, long time.

misty quigley.

there would be no other answer. she asked first.

misty has no shame in admitting that she has a crush on you. and of course, to ask you out on a date, this shame decreases even more. she doesn't even care if she will be made fun of by her colleagues, what really matters is that she planned everything for you to accept.

and when I say everything, it really means everything.

from the moment she will slide up to your table and quietly ask if you accept, to the tone of voice she will use to persuade your brain to accept, to the place she will take you hand in hand and then let it slide. … she literally thought of every detail.

and, well, knowing misty quigley's ability to create plans, the whole thing worked out… until you figured it all out and admitted that you liked it even more, much to her surprise.

laura lee.

you asked first, of course. there would be no other answer either.

of course, not ruling out the possibility of laura lee asking first, given her hidden impulsive personality, but, in this case, taking the obviousness into account, you asked, and had to be careful with every line said in the invitation.

of course, it needed to be at a time when you were alone, because you were afraid that pressure from other people would make you feel suffocated. this, of course, did not happen. she thought it was a classic weekend outing, like you guys usually did, until she realized your real intentions.

and, truly, at no point did it make her feel restrained or scared. she was ready to be vulnerable and be herself around you, no matter what.

(but, if you casually ask lottie at some point, she will definitely claim that she saw laura lee rehearsing some speeches and compliments for you in the locker room mirror…)